#im so glad you're feeling better
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I'm sorry this isn't a submission, but I felt a little nervous to submit this publicly. I don't really want people knowing who I am. I suggest tagging this ask with a TW for abuse mentions. I don't go into any explicit detail but still feel it best to provide this warning.
I grew up in an abusive household and continued to live in the same house for the next 21 years of my life. Some time last year, I cried to Lord Hermes and prayed that he please deliver me from this house. I asked to move away. I even asked specifically to move to Greece someday (which I still currently want to do). I begged for him to get me out of that house, out of the place where almost all of my trauma had taken place.
This year, I spontaneously was told we were moving, and it wasn't just a move a few cities away, we were going completely out of the state. It was a big move and would completely uproot our lives. At first, I took the news poorly. I was angry and even in denial. I desperately fought the change and tried to find ways to stay in my home state. However, I knew I had no choice in the end and relented. I started packing my things and reluctantly accepted the inevitable move.
If I'm being honest, I actually was kind of mad at Hermes for a bit of time. I know it sounds dumb, especially since I had literally asked for it, but it was difficult for me to come to terms with such a massive change. At the time the move was announced, I had also finally started building an actual life for myself in my home state. I was making friends, planning for college, and putting myself out there, so it was a little devastating to have all of those plans immediately turned on their heads. I was forced to go to a specific college now, I was forced to say goodbye to healthy and new friends I made, I was forced to see my home state for what feels like it will be the last time in my life. I was terrified, and I was bitter, even knowing I asked for it.
But when I finally arrived at the new house, I began feeling a little better. Slowly but surely, this heavy weight started lifting from my chest. I made new friends quickly, I felt more motivated to take care of myself, and I even started going outside more often. Even though the house is much smaller and I have to be around my father more physically, I began building more self-confidence, helping me set aside his presence more and focus on myself. I had asked for Lord Hermes' help in adjusting to the change and apologized for feeling so bitter in the beginning, and despite my complex feelings about the move at the start, he lent me his assistance anyway. I am very grateful for his understanding and his willingness not to judge us humans for the feelings we have, even towards things we literally ask for.
I wanted to tell this story in order to share my experience and express that it's ok for us to have negative feelings about the actions our deities take or even the way a prayer is answered because at the end of the day, any change can be difficult, and I feel that deities understand that humans struggle with significant changes. Lord Hermes is especially patient and kind. I feel that he understands humans in a way that cannot be easily described. He's seen both the best and worst of us, yet he chooses to continue reaching out to us anyway. He chooses to continue forming close relationships and staying by our sides and helping us through the toughest transitions of our lives. I hope he'll be there with me in my final transition from life to death - the biggest change of them all.
Lord Hermes is a god of Change and Transition, I think, and of learning to accept both of those things. He is a wonderfully caring god, and to anyone on the fence about worshipping him or even just reaching out, I encourage to give it a chance. It's a decision you will be forever grateful to yourself for because once a friend, Hermes will always be a friend. ❤️
Thank you for sharing your story! /gen
#tw abuse mention#hail lord Hermes!#im so glad you're feeling better#Hermes delivered me from an abusive household so your story hits somewhat close to home for me#I wish you the best of luck#reblog#temple of hermes#ask#anon#hermes deity#hermes worship
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helloooo my dearest darling listeners, i am back on my soapbox to regale you all with the marvelous things i witnessed/experienced on my Whimsical As Fuck™️ three hour drive today. not necessarily in order <3
some cute does with bigass floppy ears / very sweet waitress who called me "hon" and put the most tasty looking crepes on my table / a pair of hawks divebombing a golden eagle / a kite (the bird) / a flock of magpies / some GORGEOUS scenery / a rainbow / lovely rain sprinklings / MORE gorgeous scenery, i mean what the fuck / fields of purple/orange/red tipped bushes / a meadow of buttercup-yellow very tall grass, in which many picturesque trees stood / lots of fluffy, adorable, tasty cows / a large herd of likely-feral horses with a wonderful variety of patterns & colors / the fluffiest husky ever / the juxtaposition of cold wind through an open window + warm sunlight / the most stunning snow-coated mountain of whites and blues in the sun, wreathed in clouds / no seriously some really fucking Gorgeous scenery, i was near tears with some of it
#i am feeling. Better Than I Have In A While#you know! last night i was very unhappy that i would have to do this drive!#but after my 2 hour doze in the ihop parking lot#and a nice breakfast of crepes and tea w/ my book#i was feeling better and decided Fuck It. im gonna make myself enjoy this drive#im gonna take my goddamn time and really absorb my surroundings#by fuck i will stop at a rest stop and take a walk! and i did all of it!#life is actually worth it! glad to have continuous confirmation of that#its so nice to drive and actually see things#beautiful landscapes... wildlife... Geography...#instead of just Flat. Scrub. Brown. More Scrub. Dirt. Dead Scrub aka Tumbleweed. Boring Brown Hills. No Weather.#i can go outside the clouds are Full and the air is Fresh and birds are Singing and i am Alive#absolutely unprompted#i expect the feeling of realness to fade soon but i will enjoy it while it lasts!#and maybe if i feel it often enough it will outlast the disconnect!#now i think i am going to treat myself to a pork bun i just bought & get one of the nice beers from the garage#ive Earned It!#you all treat yourself to something you like as well. we have all earned it simply by existing!#you're here today! Yippee! indulge!#im feeling so fucking whimsical today... ill go work on setting up my extra monitor and figuring out how the fuck that works!#my mic has already arrived! i have hope that i will do a test stream Soon!
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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aw she's bleeding :((( good luck surviving ta whoever did it lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooo
#two#the war organization#oc stuff#oc: nebulous empress#eyestrain#blood#she looks at you like this and you're donezo kaput on your highway ta hell#nebbie inspires me ta make the most intricate pieces imaginable its insane#i feel like the lineart looked better tho :/#anyways enjoy this ig#im glad yall like her so much b/c i think abt her a lot#shes hard ta write skljfdsklfjskldfjskd#FUCK MAN#after the rfs arc idk what the fuck ta do w/her#like shes too cool ta just toss her aside i cant do that#ill figure it out maybe#the rfs is probably years from now w/the way two updates are going 💀 (they're not)#spacie scribbles
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I'm somewhat mad right now. not about anything crazy, just remembering stuff and all that 📀🔧 tss
#that fucking cat that I hate#bro was so hatefilled we had never seen anything like it#oh yeah if you're genuinely curious on what I'm mad about it's about the incident IYKYK#sprunki#fictionkin#alterhuman#clunkr#clunkr fictionkin#clukr#sprunki clukr#sprunki fictionkin#clukr fictionkin#sprunki silver#ALSO I'm still happy about those Sprunki fictives I met#Fun computer my beloved your so cool#im so glad I made you and Funbot#that actually makes me feel better#thanks then
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GERUUUUUU, it’s me L1anArts4u. I made another fanart!!!!!! That comfort drabble hit me hard and i thought, why not draw it. I wouldda post it on my acc if it wasn’t for the fact it got hacked and i gotta deactivate it TvT. Anyways, i’ll create a new acc soon, ALSO, I’M HAPPY YOUR FINALS ARE OVER. And u feel better (rlly late HAHAHA) from your sickness, Write well, i look forward in drawing them for youuuuuuuu >////<
#I WAS SO WORRIED YOU DEACTIVATED#im glad you're okay now!!#thank you for your kind words#(/ω\)#i feel better now dont worry (´•ω•)♡#IM SO HAPPY YOU WILL BE BACK o(≧∇≦o)(o≧∇≦)o#geru.talk#THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS#I LOVE IT!!!!!!
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I've had enough character development for this year. Can we skip to the beach filler episode?
#lmao#had a great day mostly but im feeling the burnout#hindsight im glad im gonna be taking summer off from college#yeah it'll take me a bit longer to get my degree but i crammed in a lot of shit within a year#and working on projects and theory and application non stop#caught up to me#there's still a part of me thats like BITCH TAKE 1 CLASS THATS 1 LESS TO WORRY ABOUT#but the other is like BITCH 1 CLASS AINT GON DO SHIT CHILL YOU OVERACHIEVING CHICKEN FRIED FUCK#“you take everything on like you're running out of time even though the thing you need most is rest.”#thank you friendo for calling me out on my bullshit 🙏🏻💯#maybe i should hire them to tell me when i need to slow the fuck down#cause even though ive gotten better with taking care of myself i get so caught up with my ambitions that it bites me in the ass#that and when you're disabled and if you get that window of opportunity where you feel good you want to crank all the shit out you can#before going back into hibernation mode#vicious cycle#anyway i be ranting#no magenta here but some other color that we shouldn't be able to comprehend but we do anyway
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Art vs Artist 2023!! 💥 I didn't expect the year to be so colourful... but there is a Severe lack of purples. Anyway, it was a literal struggle trying not to add Pavitr art because he keeps infiltrating every month T-T
Happy to say I'm proud of the art evolution! Thank you Spider-Verse for pushing me outside the box and really embracing the fun and whimsical style of Mumbattan. Who knew mimicking old timey comics would be so much fun?
high quality versions of the above images under the cut!!
i fuckin love this clip i want it tattooed on my soul
#i'm so very grateful for spiderverse giving me such a boost in terms of art style#atsv came along and i tried to cement myself as “you're that guy who draws pavitr all the time” and like. mission accomplished?#been up to my eyeballs with so many things in my real life and feeling pretty low all the time. but im glad i still had the energy-#-to pump things out every now and then. the art and its evolution is more or less a sign im still doing stuff#in fact i think a big reason for the departure from my old style was simply because the new one encouraged me to have fun#like “it don't need to be perfect. messy lines are a part of the charm. bleeding colours and imperfect inks are what makes art cool”#so in a way i think changing art styles made ME feel a lot a better about myself and what i do to some extent#but yeah. other than that... if you told me to name anything interesting that happened to me this year i couldn't tell you#it's just not that kind of year for me#i got chalice of the gods for my birthday tho! so that was a real blast to the past#might post some doodles i've made of some scenes pretty soon#happy 2023 yall!! manifesting that next year is a good one#art vs artist#artoftheagni#art vs artists 2023
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nobody here really cares about my object show opinions im sure but just to toss my Coin Opinion into the Hat Internet. feel like its weird to try and paint cabby as wrong for spending so much time taking notes on people when it was established not too long ago that she cant remember most things if she doesnt write them down
#i feel like the 'what if i forget' / 'then ill tell you again' line was supposed to be sweet but it just came off as. like idk meanspirited#like i get it bot hates other people defining them thats basically the only thing they talk about as a character#but i think maybe in this situation specifically they need to kind of get over it#i feel like im still watching ii out of obligation cause i still wanna see how it ends. season 3's been pretty mid all the way through tbh#inanimate insanity spoilers#ii spoilers#unrelated to the cabby thing but trying to act like balloon and nickel were the same level of awful to each other is. so weird.#why are they dancing around so much what nickel did to suitcase. like ok thanks nickel im soo glad you're trying to be better now but.#but can we talk about the person who you caused so much stress she started having paranoid hallucinations#like can we bring that up please#anyway. looking forward to tpot i love tpot#brifdi
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Hi! As someone who now kinda wants to check out Trigun because of the hype, do you recommend that I can start with Stampede? Or do I really need to watch the OG anime first to better understand/enjoy it? Thank you! 🙋🏻♀️
you can start with stampede! i'd say knowing the context of the original enhances the experience but isn't necessary to enjoy the show. I would consider stampede more viewer-friendly, especially for those of us who are used to modern storytelling conventions (the original suffers the consequences of general writing trends in anime at the time it was produced and of the fact that it was produced long before the manga was finished, so the story is somewhat disjointed and has a lot of filler which makes it REALLY hard to get into.) if you do end up liking stampede, however, I'd suggest trying out watching at least SOME of the original because it adds a lot of cool nuance and context to the story that stampede tells!
#your only REAL handicap is that you're missing out on references that clue you into the context of the story early on#and quite a few references in the finale. but none of those references are hugely necessary to understand the plot so you should be fine!#i didn't DISLIKE the origial and like i said im glad i watched it first but it was. REALLY hard to get into.#even as someone who understands writing trends & enjoys a lot of older anime trigun is. a product of its time.#there's almost no context given for the story you're witnessing until a good 20 episodes in.#the main villain isn't named at all until halfway through the runtime#and even TWO EPISODES BEFORE THE FINALE i still did not have enough information to fully understand what the hell was going on#vash was going into the final fucking battle and i still didn't know what knives WAS let alone what the fuck he WANTED#not to mention nick was FULLY DEAD and i still didnt know what his deal was. like ok go off king have ur moment bleeding out in the church#but can you EXPLAIN WHATS GOING ON BEFORE YOU SUCCUMB TO THE BLOOD LOSS PLEASEEEEEEEE GOD#stampede does that whole thing WAY better imo. it sprinkles the backstory more naturally throughout the show#again. part of this is 90s writing conventions. but there's only so much i can take fr#it was like comparable to evangelion in terms of LACK OF CONTEXT#anyways. this isnt supposed to be me complaining about the original. it had its moments. i watched 24 episodes of it like it was not BAD#but like. i think the story really benefits from the way that stampede chooses to lay everything out. is what im saying.#tldr watch them in whatever order but if you like stampede try the original#you might not like it more than stampede but you WILL feel cool when you realize how it all relates to stampede#asks#vash is also WAAAAAY sexier in stampede. HOWEVER. the women of the show are like 10 times sexier in the original. so. pick your poison ig
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idk if this is glaringly obvious but a lot of Rosienne is just me projecting growing up with undiagnosed ADHD
#💌 personal#🥀 rosienne#what if you're always too much for everyone and no way to make yourself palatable to others works#so you're just angry and jealous and eternally convinced nobody will ever love you or even accept you because you're always too much#and you expect everyone to mock you at all times#and you feel dumber than everyone else around#and being stuck in high school doesn't help you because it's high school and it inherently kind of sucks#anyways i love my boy im glad he's able to have some better experiences than me <3#oh also i this sounds depressing but i AM better now dhfjdjfj#due to not being in high school anymore <3 (and also finding better friends)
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Sometimes I still think about how sweet it was when that anon checked on me last year when I was posting overly dark jokes. Thank you whoever you were, that was kind
#i am so much better now but last year was a bad one for me#there was a time in the fall where i literally couldn't get out of bed just because it felt pointless#anyway my mom also forced me to make a doctors appointment and luckily my doctor is super kind and got me on a good medication#but it also was just from stuff like losing my job struggling in school and going through the hurricane etc#im just so glad that i was pushed through that by concerned folks because im enjoying life much better now and that wasnt that long ago#anyway if you're struggling badly right now pls know its not hopeless#reach out for the help youre given and try to see yourself as worth it to fight for#take it little steps at a time#celebrate the small victories like having a shower or taking a walk or answering a call#the best thing for me other than the doctor was just finding ways to be around other people more#instead of feeling defeated i had to think of ways i could fix the loneliness that was affecting me so much#i had to get proactive like i started volunteering and started a book club etc#also i just made myself be very honest with the friends i already had about my struggles and it helps with feeling closer to them#and less alone in it all#because its not that uncommon to have those kinds of struggles and it helps other people open up about their own or just know how you are#the hardest things to do were the most rewarding things in the end#volunteering gave me a reason to get out of the house meeting new people and trying new things and feeling good about myself and#i had to remind myself that i was able to offer things of value and that other people like having me around actually#like the book club is something my friend group looks forward to so much and made new friends through and i started that!#even though i was nervous about it and didnt know if theyd like it at all#other people need you just as much as you need them and thats the truth bby#p
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i have to admit its kinda crazy being involved in fandoms again since the last time ive really been involved in a fandom was during my steven universe days
#soren.txt#aka when i was a teenager and what was happening in my life at the time was really Not Great#so i guess ive spent the past couple of years recollecting myself and everything#its nice that im finally in a stable point with my mental health so that i can actually connect with other people again#among other things#in case you're wondering. the o/wl h/ouse fandom doesn't really count bc i was sticking to the sidelines 90% of the time#with my own little niche in the corner lol#i do appreciate t/oh a ton though even still for getting me back into writing#there was straight up a period in 2021 where i was just writing a ton and not posting any of it bc 1. i wasn't confident in my skills#and 2. i was extremely depressed. like extremely *extremely* depressed so i didn't feel worthy of posting any of it#im actually glad i didnt. i think it was better to just have this little story solely for me and not worry about quality#im pretty sure writing was one of the things that helped me crawl out of my depression rut#so im grateful for it
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Not to be mean but can people not send me asks, asking if they can "liph//yo beam" me?
#im sorry but i do not ship it. at all.#the ship makes me viscerally uncomfortable.#also imo??? hiyori deserves So Much Better than lxl#like. they treat her so awfully when it comes to romance that its just sad to read abt#like if you ship it!! good for you!! im glad that the ship makes you so happy!! /gen#but that ship is NOT for me!!! i just. also.#do not like the whole ''i have trauma with women but you're different cuz you're not like other girls'' trope that they would have#hiyori deserves someone who wont literally call her ugly and say that she'll be rejected bc she doesnt look pretty#and that she NEEDS to throw all of her ''ugly clothes'' away. like im actually mad that they made lxl tell her that in canon#lxl are shallow assholes. i love them but theyre genuinely so horrible to her and they literally told her that#she wont be a heroine bc she doesnt look pretty anymore. i cannot like a ship that puts one down so much like that.#im sorry. normlly i wouldnt rant abt a ship i dont really like in the tags but im trying to keep this post out of the main tags#to avoid upsetting people who had nothing to do with this ^^#but this isnt the first time ive gotten asked that or been sent unsolicited liph//yo#even though my blog makes it VERY CLEAR how i feel abt the ship :/#sooo ^^^
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man there's this one post that I can't track down but I gotta talk about it
it talks about how the op was singing in the kitchen and their roommate slid around the corner and was relieved that they were singing bc they don't do that then they're depressed, and that the kitchen had been silent for 3 months. thinkin about that post today
#mostly bc .... i just realized that people have had that same recognition for me.#i got horrifically depressed in college. my sophomore year.#and when i dont feel badly. i frequently wear flowers in my hair. theyre pretty and i like to match them. but that takes energy.#and i hadnt even noticed that id stopped#until one day i went 'hey. its been a while since ive done that. lets wear some pink flowers today'#and my piano teacher looked at me and said 'oh good. youre feeling better today. im so glad'#and whrn i went ???????? he said. 'you're wearing flowers again. you havent done that in a long time and youve been really down.'#'but your flowers are back! im happy for you'#and now whenever i see that post im like. oh. other people see me like the op's roommate does. my flowers came back.......
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I was the one who's struggling to going through y6 but the realization I had when I realized you're my fav MineDai author a while back made my brain blue screen heuwje
Honestly thank you for the good food in both mediums ‼️‼️
OHH YOU'VE ALSO READ MY MINEDAI FICS??? mortifying BUT i'm so glad you enjoy my stuff hi ^^ !!
#snap chats#i love makin stuff for em.. they make my brain happy#also hi :) hope Y6 is A Game for you#ik a lot of people squint at it. i am one of those people#its not a terrible game it's just reaaaally mid imo and the plot's not saving it#but w/e we can talk bout that when you finish it i hope you're able to find more joy out of it than the typical player !#O BTW I SAY MORTIFYING CAUSE IM REALLY INSECURE ABOUT MY WRITING ☠️☠️#'snap why post then' because i have an agenda and i want to Not be an insecure baby about my writing#i do love writing when i get the ball rolling because with writing i feel like i can better explore why i love these charcters#i can only do so much with comics and all and sometimes comics just cant fully convey what im trying to say#but UGH minedai... i love writing them the most No Shit but i just do#their dynamic is so fun and interesting and i dont really see it portrayed in a way that tickles me#not saying how other people do it is bad or wrong obvi its just that there are aspects of it i dont see touched on too much#it makes me really happy when people say they like my writing because of that tho#cause i truly dont expect people to- sometimes i feel like i portray them wrong or just not in a way people like#so yeah im glad you like my fics ! def gives me motivation to keep writing :)#but yeah sorry for the prattle- again thank you for reading ^^#i hope to have more minedai stuff done. i just gotta think of stuff first..#too busy being ill over my cringe and writing fics for that- which i have a new one ready i just have to look it over again
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