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thewalkingdead-fan101 · 4 years

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In this hell Daryl Dixon X Reader part 9/??

Hey guys!

Its finally time for part 9, I really hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! It turned out a little bit longer than I anticipated! I hope everyone is safe, and healthy and I just want to wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Seasons Greetings! Thank you for being patient and so lovely!

Warnings- Slow burn, General Walking Dead stuff, Blood, Gore, Swearing, Shane descending further into insanity, walkers, Sophia.

I looked to my left, spotting Dale looking at me worriedly.

I place a hand on my chest, wiping my fore head with my free hand.

“I-I uh, I heard most of it.. if not all of it.” “I’m sorry.” Dale shook his head. “No, Dont be.. I should thank you..”

“Thank me?” “For showing me that, that is who my brother is now.” “(Y/n), if I’d known you were there I wouldn’t have said anything.” “I heard him threaten you Dale. I’ve noticed the change in Shane since Atlanta, You don’t have to try to cushion this.”

“I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.”

I sighed, walking over to Dale, hugging the older man.

“It’s not your fault Dale… It’s his own.” I softly spoke.

Dale had started to relax, softly patting my shoulder.

We both pulled back from the hug and shared a soft smile.

“I’ve got to go, Sorry Dale.”

“No, you go on.” He nodded.

I turned away and made my way to the house.

I searched for my brother on the way back to see the others, sighing with relief as I don’t see him anywhere.

A strong scent drifted throughout the house, the source coming from the kitchen.

The stairs softly creaked as I made my way up to the second floor, Carol smiling at me as she noticed me.

“Ill take that for you.” She rubbed my shoulder, taking the towel from my hands.

“Thank you.” “I need to keep myself occupied, im starting to go stir crazy.” She softly chuckled, retreating back towards the bathroom.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the door to the guest room open, Daryl emerging.

“Hey you.” I smiled as I turned around.

“Hey.” He nodded, his head motioning to follow him to the room.

I sat on the bed as I watched Daryl pull his vest on over his tank.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Spoke to Hershel.” “Oh… what did he say?”

“He don’t like me in ‘ere. Said I can go back with ya.” “Oh, is that so?” I smirked, getting up making my way over to him.

His eyes were locked on me, as if he were a hawk zoning in on its prey.

I softly placed my hands onto the front of his vest, straightening it out. I glanced up to find his eyes already fixed onto me. “What?” “Nothing.” He shook his head. I smiled as I dropped my hands from his chest, only to have Daryl’s hands reach down to get a hold of mine. I looked down, watching as my fingers intertwined with his.

“Look at me.” Daryl muttered. I glanced up and smiled once again, watching his face intently.

“What are ya’ smiling at?” “You, Im just glad that you’re okay.” “It’ll take a lot more than a dumb horse to keep me down.” He mumbled. “You’re only human Daryl.” “Nothing gets by ya’ does it?” He joked lightly.

I chuckled and playfully shoved his chest, moving toward the door.

Daryl’s hands grabbed my waist, pulling me back into his embrace as he playfully ran his hands along my sides, a squeal leaving my throat as he took advantage of his surprise assault, setting me on the bed to continue his attack.

“Daryl, Da-“ I cut myself off with a string of laughter, his fingers digging further into my side.

“No, No stop-“ I continued to laugh. After a few moments, his hands stopped as he moved them both up to cradle my face, pressing a soft kiss against my lips. I pulled back, a smirk evident. “You sure got some nerve Dixon.” I shook my head, smile tugging on my lips. He tilted his head as he looked at me. “Thinking you can kiss a lady after putting your hands on her like that.” I smirked. “Lady? I ain’t seen no lady.” He smirked back. “Oh you shit!” I laughed as I lightly smacked his shoulder, causing him to laugh the slightest bit more.

My heart swelled as I watched him laugh, truly carefree in this moment. I can’t help but think about how beautiful he is, the way his eyes slightly sparkle, and how his nose scrunches up, accenting the way his skin slightly crinkles by his eyes, and with each rumble of laughter that emits from his chest his teeth become that little bit more visible. The more I stare at him, the deeper my love for him grows.

I reached my hand up and gently brushed the hair out of his eyes. “Dont be gettin’ all sappy on me now.” Daryl teased. “It’s hard not to sometimes.” I smiled.

He rolled his eyes as he leant in for another kiss. Before his lips connected with mine, there was a cough coming from the doorway. My attention moved to the door, where I saw Hershel standing, annoyance clear to read on his features. Daryl sighed, dropping his head to rest against my shoulder briefly, before pushing himself up. “Hershel, hi.” I softly smiled. “I think it’s for the best if the two of you left now.” He nodded towards Daryl and I. “Oh, Of co-“ “Don’t worry, we’re leaving old man.” Daryl cut me off before I had a chance to say anything else, grabbing the little amount of belongings that he’d had with him in the room, pushing past Hershel.

I looked over to Hershel and stood from the bed. “I’m sorry Hershel, he-“ “I have rules in this house. Rules of which I expect the people that live under this roof, ‘guests’ included to follow.” He stated, shaking his head head as he left. I glanced down, only to see one of Daryls discarded shirts on the floor at the end of the bed. I bent down, collecting the stray shirt and left the now vacant room.

The rest of the after noon had flown by, we were all seated by the small campfire, in the middle of our tents and vehicles, eating beans and rice, courtesy of Maggies gift basket to Glenn, who still seems to be feeling bad about whatever it was that the gift pack was given to him for.

I looked over to see Lori sitting with her little family, her eyes made short contact with my own as she did a small nod.

I subtly watched Rick, noticing that he kept stealing little glances at his wife abdomen, lifting her hand to press a soft kiss against the skin there, giving her a soft smile when she looked over to him.

Daryl was sitting on top of the RV, after deciding that we needed a watch while we had the fire lit, preferring a little bit of alone time too. Glenn was sitting with Dale and T-dog, all talking about the differences in the wiring and production of Dales RV compared to others. Andrea and Carol were quietly chatting, in between myself and Shane, the latter sat beside Andrea, the most sour look on his face. I followed his gaze, only to realise that it’s his ‘Best friend’ on the receiving end of his glare. I lightly sighed as I stood, picking up my plate, collecting everyone else’s that had finished and taking it to the tub.

“You alright there baby sis?” Shane spoke up from behind me. I continued to wash the dishes, I turned to grab his, only for Shane to pull them out of my reach. “Yeah, im fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” “Just checking up on you is all.” He smiled. “We haven’t seen much of each other.” He finished. “What are you talking about? We went on a run together this morning.” “It doesn’t matter.” He laughed.

“Okay, can you give me your dishes now?” I asked as I rolled my eyes. “No I can’t, now just listen to me, you can do the dishes later.” He chuckled passing me the dish towel to dry my hands and placing his dishes in the sink. I took the dish towel from him and wiped my hands, hanging it back over the makeshift rail we have. “What do you want Shane? Im tired and I want to finish my job and goto bed.” I sighed.

“Right, well, I uh- I found this when Andrea and I went out earlier.” He mumbled, pulling a decently sized book from behind his back. I took a step towards Shane, eyeing him and the book suspiciously. “Shane, you didn’t-“ “Shut up, take the damn book.” he waved the book up and down in front of me.

I reached out and took the book from his hands, examining the book.

The book had a thin layer of dust covering it, other than the fingerprints where Shane had previously held it. The top right corner of the book was slightly bent, the edges lightly deteriorated, the pages now a slight cream colour instead of the pristine white they once would’ve been. I blew the dust off of the cover, softly wiping it. “Your pregnancy: Week by week.” I read aloud. “Yeah, I read a little bit of the about author section, the guy who wrote it is a baby doctor.” “An OB/GYN?” I asked. “Yeah that, seems to know his stuff.” He nodded as I turned the book over to have a skim through the blurb. “Thank you.” I smiled softly, giving him a small side hug. “Dont mention it.” He replied patting my back. I pulled back and looked at him, only for Shane to now look at my abdomen. “What?” “How far along are you now?” He asked.

I thought for a moment before looking back to Shane. “How long has it been since the CDC?” “Four weeks, three days.” He nodded, his gaze moving toward the campfire. “Then that makes me-“ I paused, calculating in my head.

“Nine weeks and three days.” I finished. “Give or take a few days.” I added. “Well shit.” He chuckled. “Yeah, little bean is growing quickly, still seems like it was only yesterday I was peeing on a stick at the quarry.” I joked. Shane said quiet for a second, deep in his mind. “It was a lot different back then, I wish it was like that again.” I watched as he shot daggers at Rick. “Do you mean back when Rick wasn’t in the picture?” I asked. I heard a sharp inhale and watched as Shane’s whole demeanour changed. “No. How could you even say that?” His eyes bore into me. “Im sorry, you’ve just been acting different.” I sighed, placing the book down on the chair, turning and moving towards the tub once more. His rough hand grabbed onto my upper arm, his grip harsh as he spun me to face him. “Shane-“ “You don’t know anything.” He cut me off. “Rick is my best friend.” He sneered, his grip on my arm tightening. “Shane, let me g-“ I tried to talk. “You have no business asking this.” He looked me up and down, disgusted. “Shane.” I warned, looking around us. “You think im not happy my best friend is alive?” his grip was now tighter than it was previously, I could feel my arm starting to throb under his hold. “Shane, you need to let me go.” I stated sternly. “I’ll let you go when you let go of this stupid idea you go stuck in your little head.” He pulled me closer, speaking down to me. “Let me go Shane.” “You’ve been spending too much time with Dale.” He paused. “He is filling your head with this Horse shit!” He sneered, throwing my arm away from his grip, storming off. I watched my brother storm off, kicking the ground as he neared his tent, barging through the material. I shook my head, glancing at the book before going back to finishing the dishes. As soon as I finished washing and drying the dishes, I wiped my hands once more and moved to pick up the book, making my way back over to the small group, absentmindedly rubbing my arm. “Hey guys, im going to head to bed.” I smiled softly. I heard a chorus of goodnights, and looked over to Lori, who had looked over to me and smiled. “Goodnight sweetie.” She looked over to my arm and sent me a questioning glare. I softly shook my head, causing her to sternly look at me. I turned and made my way towards the RV. Daryls attention instantly landed on me, brow raised.

“What do ya’ want?” “I was just coming to say night.” I smiled up at him. “Ok.” “Ill see you later?” I asked, in which he only responded with a short nod. I made my way back to my tent, as I entered it I placed the book down on my bed, turning to get dressed. “Oh Jesus Christ.” I gasped, my hand making its way to my chest as I saw Lori, sitting on the small chair near my back pack of clothes, a worried expression on her face. “What?” I asked, noticing her gaze looking me up and down, before fixating onto my arm. “What happened?” She asked, standing up and making her way over to me. “Nothing, im okay Lori.” “Did Daryl do this?” “Oh my god no!” I laughed, quickly changing my tone to serious when I notice she wasn’t messing around. “No, Lori, No. Daryl didn’t do this.” “Who did?” She asked, coming closer to examine my arm.

I followed her hands as they reached out and grabbed my arm, seeing the red print on my arm, a purple shade already developing on the irritated skin.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” “Shane happened, it doesn’t hurt though.” I smiled. She lightly pressed her index finger against the skin, causing me to flinch. “It doesn’t hurt though.” She mocked, a small smile evident on her face. “What happened (Y/n)?” “We were just roughhousing.” I lied, not wanting her to get involved, well anymore than what she already is. She nodded her head, a little suspicious, but not pressing the conversation further. I took a seat on the bed and picked up the book, looking up at Lori. “He got me this.” “Shane?”

“Yeah, said he found it on a run.” “Thats surprising.” “I’d say, considering he has the ‘If it’s not essential, it’s not worth bringing back.’ Rule.” I laughed. Lori laughed along with me. “Alright Honey, if you need anything, come get me.” She hugged me. “Night Lori.” I smiled hugging her back. Once she had left, I flipped the book open, flicking through the first few weeks which were neatly typed onto separate pages, in their own chapters. It didn’t take long to find Chapter/Week Nine.

At the top of the page it had a small chart with the baby’s information, and in big bold lettering I read: 9 Weeks Pregnant; Your baby is as big as a green olive.

I stayed up and continued to read.

This is the week that your baby develops out of their embryonic stage and officially enters the foetal period.

The baby’s liver, the spleen and the gallbladder are all under construction now, as well as the baby’s tiny muscles are forming.

I absentmindedly started to caress my abdomen as I continued to read.

While it's too early to feel any kicks yet, it's not too early to hear something, your baby's heartbeat might be audible on a doppler machine! “Yeah as if id have access to that.” I scoffed.

The spinal cord "tail" at your baby-to-be's rump has all but disappeared! Your baby is looking more and more like a tiny human.

I continue reading the next few pages, taking in all of the information about Bean, not even noticing Daryls presence until I feel an arm slide over my stomach.

I put the book down, making sure to save the page im on.

“Hey.” He mumbled into my ear, as a turned to face him.

“Hey.” “I thought ya’ were going to bed..” “I did, but I got caught up reading.” “Oh yeah? What?” “Just some baby stuff.” He nodded. “Baby Dixon is the size of an Olive.” I yawned, Daryl yawning after me. “Ain’t that big.” He said, laying on his back, moving his arm behind his head, his other arm pulling me into him, closing his eyes. I looked up to respond but heard his light snores, signalling he fell into an instant sleep. I leant over his chest and turned the dim lantern off, snuggling back into Daryl.

The next morning I woke up, seeing Daryl in a deep sleep beside me. I carefully climbed over him, checking to see if he was disrupted once both feet were on the ground, watching as he grumbled and rolled over, facing my side. I quickly dressed, pulling on some shoes, exiting the tent. I made my way to the supply tent, running into Lori who had just walked out, a toilet roll in hands. “Morning.” She smiled. “Morning.” “You need to use this too?” She asked, lifting the Toilet paper. “You know I do.” I chuckled.

We both walked away, towards the second field near the stables, tucked away in an area with a little more privacy.

“I didn’t think you’d be awake this early.” She smirked, turning around as I squatted.

“Oh really? Why is that?” I asked, as she handed me the roll, taking what I needed. “Well, your first night back with Daryl.” She suggested. Even looking at the back of her head I could sense her grin. “Nothing like that happened.” I shook my head smiling at her antics, finishing my business, standing up. I walked over to where she stood, switching positions. “So, nothing happened?” She asked. “No, we just had a little bit of small talk, and fell asleep.” “So, did you end up reading any of that book last night?” “Yeah, I read the complete chapter covering the ninth week.”

“Anything interesting?” She asked.

“Just some key developmental points, Bean is the size of an olive though.” “He won’t stay that size for long.” She chuckled. “Trust me, it won’t be long until he is the size of an orange, then the size of a coconut and then the size of a watermelon.” She spoke. “I don’t even want to think about how much bigger bean will get.” “You know you can’t keep calling the baby bean right?” She asked as she walked over. “You need to have a name for them.” She continued. “I know. But I feel as though im going to know his or her name when I look at them.” I paused. “So for now, it’s bean.” I smiled as we walked back to camp.

We made it back to the communal tent, using a few drops of the sanitiser that Glenn had brung back from a run before leaving. As we left the tent, a stick had snapped to the right, Lori and I both looked over to see Carol coming to us, a smile on her face. “Morning Carol.” I smiled. “Morning ladies.” She responded, her basket being transferred to her other hand. “Morning.” “How do eggs sound for breakfast?” She asked, a small smile on her face as she held up the basket containing a dozen or so eggs. “Sounds good.” Lori responded as I smiled. “Need any help?” I asked. Carol shook her head. “No honey, I will manage.” She smiled, lighting the fire, setting up the rack and pan, instantly cracking the eggs and scrambling them. The door to the RV opened, Dale stepping out, his favourite mug rested between both hands as he breathed in the morning air, a smile on his features. Andrea was next to exit the RV, stretching and making her way over. Andrea walked right past Lori and I, barley acknowledging us as she made her way to Shanes tent.

I shook my head and sat down on one of the seats. “Okay guys, breakfast is getting served.” Carol called out, serving some egg on the plates. “Thank you.” Lori smiled, grabbing three plates, sitting them on her chair. “I’ll be back.” Lori stated, walking to her tent. I grabbed two plates and smiled at Carol. “Thank you.” “You’re welcome sweetie.” Daryl was the next person to emerge, looking around grumbling and walking over, sitting on the ground in front of the seat I was in, leaning his back against the front of my chair, positioning himself between my legs. “Here.” I handed him his plate and fork. Daryl nodded in response and took his plate from me, starting to devour his meal. Carl shot out of the tent, followed by Lori, and lastly Rick, who had all taken a seat, Carl yawned as he rested his elbows onto his knees, then propping his head up on his hands, softly tracing in the dirt with his shoes. “Carl, honey don’t do that.” Lori spoke sweetly, handing Carl his breakfast, then Rick his. “Leave him be Lori.” Rick sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. “Morning all.” Shane called out, walking toward us all, sporting his police cap, bending down to grab the last plate Andrea following, her face as hard as stone almost, grabbing a sharpening block and her knife, taking a seat on the small log by the fire, sharpening said knife. I looked over to my right and watched as Glenn took a seat at the base of one of the trees closer to the house, and T-dog was crouched down by the fire, warming his hands.

We all ate in silence, Carol walking around with the pan offering leftovers to whoever wanted any. “Daryl?” She asked. “Thanks.” He nodded and held his plate out. I looked over to Glenn once again and followed his gaze to Dale, who had nodded at him. I looked back to Glenn and watched as he walked toward us all, his hands in his front pockets. “Um, guys.” He started, rubbing his face with one hand, grabbing everyones attention. “So... the barn is full of walkers.” He finished. Simultaneously, everyone had stopped what they were doing. I had stopped running my fingers through Daryl’s hair, and Daryl had looked up from his food. Andrea had stopped sharpening her knife and Carols eggs started to slowly burn. I looked over to Lori who was worriedly looking at her husband, whose expression was unreadable. Rick then stood up, Shane stepped forward. “Lets check this out.” My brother spoke loud, as he headed for the barn in question. We all followed Shane, desperate to see if what Glenn was saying was the truth. Shane was the first to make it to the barn, slowly and cautiously walking to the doors. The group stopped a few metres back and waited as Shane looked through the gap of the wooden planks. After a moment he turned around, storming towards us, scoffing.

“You cannot tell me you're all right with this.” He pushed past Rick.

“No I'm not, but we're guests here. This Isn't our land.” Rick responded. “This is our lives man!” Shane snapped, turning back to face Rick.

“Lower your voice.” Glenn spoke up, trying to not draw attention to us.

“We can't just sweep this under the rug.” Andrea said to Rick.

“It ain't right. Not remotely.” Shane paused, pacing. “Okay, we've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or we've just got to go. Now we have been talking about Fort Benning for a long time.” He finished.

“We can't go.” Rick answered.

“Why, Rick? Why?” Shane asked.

“Because my daughter is still out there.” Carols answered. I stood forward and put my hand on her arm, squeezing gently as her hand rested on top of my own. “Okay.” Shane paused, scoffing, covering his mouth with his hands. “Okay, I think It's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility.” He nodded towards Carol. I pulled Carol closer to me, and holding her hand.

“We're not leaving Sophia behind.” Rick shook his head. Out of the corner of my eye, I watch as Daryl takes a step forward, annoyance written on his face.

“I’m close to finding this girl. I just found her damn doll two days ago.” He pointed in the direction of the creek.

“You found her doll, Daryl. That's what you did. You found a doll.” Shane spoke down to him.

“You don't know what the hell you're talking about.” Daryl walked forward, chest out.

“I’m just saying what needs to be said. You get a good lead, it's in the first 48 hours.” Shane started to yell.

“Shane, stop.” Rick tried to reason, matching his volume. I moved Carol behind me and took a step forward, softly grabbing Daryls arm, instantly knowing that with whatever Shane is about to say a brawl will most likely be the end result. “Daryl, don’t.” I whispered to him to have him shake me off. “Let me tell you something else, man. If she was alive out there and saw you coming all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction!” Shane yelled at Daryl.

Daryl started shouting and trying to get past Rick, as was Shane. “Daryl, he’s not worth it.” I tried, grabbing his arm and pulling him back, Glenn and Rick pushing Shane away.

“Back off!” Rick called out, pushing Shane back. Lori placed her hand on his arm and went to speak.

“Keep your hands off me.” He glared at her, walking away. Rick took a moment, regaining his breath.

“Now just let me talk to Hershel.” He paused. “Let me figure it out.”

“What are you gonna figure out?!” Shane screamed walking towards Rick. “Enough!” Lori was quick to defend her husband, placing her left hand on Shanes chest and pushing him back.

“If we're gonna stay, if we're gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it. This is his land.” Rick spoke, his voice firm.

Dale took a step forward, looking at Rick. “Hershel sees those things in there as people.” He begins. “Sick people, his wife, his stepson.” He gestured to the barn.

“You knew?” Rick asked.

“Yesterday I talked to Hershel.” He nodded.

“And you waited the night?” Shane asked, Jaw tight. “I thought we could survive one more night. We did. I was waiting till this morning to say something. But Glenn wanted to be the one.” He defended himself.

“The man is crazy, Rick, if Hershel thinks those things are alive or no-“ Shane started to raise his voice once more, but was cut off.

I slightly jumped back as the chained doors to the barn started swaying, Loud growls and snarls coming from behind it. Daryl was quick to push me behind him, making sure to keep one of his hands connected to me so he knows I was still there. Lori ran to Carl and held him, making sure that we was okay, as Shane and Rick stared at the Doors. “Screw this.” Shane mumbled. “What? What are you going to do now? I think you’ve done enough.” I spoke up “I’m dong a perimeter check on the barn. Some one has to make sure that WE are SAFE.” He emphasised, storming off to inspect the barn.

We all made our way back to the small camp, all of us except Shane. Daryl had made sure that he had eyes on me the entire walk back, stealing glances at the barn as well as making sure I was in front of him. “Daryl, im okay, im back at the camp.” “We need ta’ talk.” He nodded toward the tent. “We can talk here.”

He shook his head and I sighed, walking to our shared tent. Upon entering Daryl had pulled me into a hug.

“Daryl, what’s going on?” I asked as I softly ran my hands along his back. “Don’t go near that barn, ya’ hear me?” He grumbled. “What-“ “Ya’ hear me?” He repeated the question. “Yes Daryl, I hear you, But wh-“ “I’m going ta’ prove that son of a bitch wrong.” He drawled out. “I don’t want you going out there!” I tried to reason with him. “I have ta’ go out there.” “No you don’t, give yourself a lit-“ “The longer I stay ‘ere, the longer that girl is out there.” “Daryl, you still aren’t healed properly.” “Im healed enough.” He argued.

“You’re a stubborn asshole Dixon.” I paused, shaking my head. “There’s no point in trying to talk you out of this. Just please, come back to me, come back to us.” I pleaded. “Ya’ know I will.” He responded, before roughly kissing me. He took a step back and left.

I took my jacket off and placed it on the end of the bed, leaving the tent once more and looking around. Dale was on watch, and Lori was sitting at the bench table with Carl, home schooling him.

I spotted Glenn pacing by the now put out fire. “Hey Glenn.” I called out, making my way toward him. He looked up from his feet, a worried expression painted on his face as he looked at me. “Glenn, what’s happening?” I asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Maggie.” “What about Maggie?” I asked. “She most likely hates me now. I told you guys about the Barn, She asked me not to.” He continued to ramble.

I looked over towards the Greene’s home, to see Maggie walking toward the chicken coop. “Glenn.” I tried to stop his rambling. “She asked me to not say anything-“ “Glenn.” “And instead of doing what she asked me to do, I completely ignored her.” “Glenn.” I smiled. He finally stopped rambling and looked at me. “I have three things im going to tell you.” “What?” He asked. “One: Maggie likes you, she wouldn’t have reacted the way she did yesterday if she didn’t.” I smiled. “Two: You told us something that you felt we needed to know. You’re an honest guy Glenn and that is one of your best qualities, if she doesn’t like you, that’s her loss.” “That was only two.” “Im getting there.” I chuckled. “Three: Go to Maggie Glenn, Talk to her.” I smiled. He slowly nodded his head and took a breath. “Okay.” He whispered, hyping himself up. “Im going to go and talk to her.” He nodded, walking toward the house. “Chicken coop!” I called out after him, watching as he turned and ran after Maggie. Glenn was out of sight in no time, eager to talk to Maggie. I looked to my left, watching as Shane did yet another walk around the barn, stopping every few seconds, looking around and occasionally rubbing his face. I don’t know who he is anymore. My brother is changing, not the man I once knew, not the kid I spent the first half of my childhood with. He looks like an addict, wanting his fix of his addiction, instead of drugs or alcohol, its Lori.

I softly shake my head and turn away, making my way to the RV, looking up at Dale. “Do you want me to take over for you?” I called out, blocking the harsh glare of the sun from my eyes. Dale looked down and smiled. “No, it’s alright, Glenn is meant to take shift next, just waiting on the boy.” He responded with a polite nod. “Okay, if I see him again, I’ll send him your way warden.” I joked, saluting him. “At ease.” He joked back, a small chuckle being heard.

I looked over to where Glenn was slowly making his way back to us, flicking his hands toward the ground, his cap carried in his left hand. “Hey, uh, she let me talk to her.” He stated as he came closer. I covered my mouth with my hand to hide my smile, stifling a laugh, trying to regain my composure. “Oh, how did that go?” I asked, still trying hard to not laugh. “She cracked an egg in my cap..” He held his cap out, showing me the broken yolk and fragments of shell. “I see.” I nodded. “Does, does this smell bad to you?” He asked, handing me his cap. “I am not smelling that.” I chuckled. “I will wash it out for you while you go and get cleaned up though.” I smiled. “Thank you.” He breathed out. “You’re welcome, just know that Dale is looking for you.” I smiled as he made his way to get cleaned up, his eyes widened as he looked back at me. “Its my shift.” He ran to get cleaned up. Dale looked over to us and shook his head as Glenn rushed around. I took his cap to our washing area and got to work, rinsing it under the tap, and picking out the eggshells, putting a little drop of detergent and scrubbing it gently, hanging it up once I finished.

I looked over to see Dale throwing Glenn his hat, having a small conversation with the young man, then entering his RV. “Hey, (Y/n).” I looked over to where Lori was, now walking toward me. “Hey, what’s up?” I asked, placing my hands in my pockets, meeting her halfway. “I know.” She paused. “I know, that this is a big ask, but would you mind sitting with Carl for me? Just for a little bit? I’m trying to make life a little bit more normal for him, im going to go look for some books, maybe ask Patricia if she has one she could lend me.” “Yeah, of course I can.” I nodded. “Thank you, so much.” She smiled, patting my shoulder as she headed toward the house. Carl had his nose buried in his book, writing down what his mother had told him before hand. “Hey Bud.” I smiled, taking Lori’s seat. “Oh, hey.” He smiled halfheartedly, looking up from his book. “Whats wrong? You don’t look too happy to see me.” I frowned. “Its not that, I just don’t need a babysitter.” He looked down. “A babysitter? Who? Me?” I asked, pausing. “No, im not a babysitter.” I shook my head, as I pointed at myself. “I think your mom, asked me to come over here so you could watch me.” He looked at me, a small smile appearing on his face. “We all know that I can get into quite a bit of trouble, and she must’ve thought that I needed someone to make sure I was being good.” “Yeah, I won’t let you get into any trouble.” He responded, shaking his head. “Exactly! So how about you show me what it is you’re writing down?” “Mom is just doing basic maths, you know, multiplications.” “Which ones?” “Nines today.” “Oh, well did she tell you about this nifty little trick?” I began. I grabbed his hands and held them out in front of him. “Say we are looking for 9 x 6, put your sixth finger down and you’ll get your answer by counting your fingers on each hand.” “What do you mean?” He asked, looking down at his hands, his sixth finger now down. “So, how many fingers are up in front of your sixth finger?” “Five.” “Okay good, and how many are after it?” “Four.” “Now, the fingers that are up before your sixth finger is what represents the tens in units, and after your sixth finger is the single units.” “So fifty-four four?” He asked, adding it in his head.

“Yeah, My grandma taught me that little trick because I struggled with Math, she called it the FMM” “Do you miss her?” “Everyday little man, im jus glad that her time was before this happened.” I smiled and messed his hair up. “Hey!” He grumbled laughing. Carl had ended up using the method that I had taught him, occasionally sign for help with the higher problems. “Ive finished my multiplications.” He smiled. “Oh, okay good.” I smiled, checking the page where he had written it all down. “Where did mom go anyway?” He asked. “She went to find some more books.” I smiled. Carl groaned and dramatically dropped his head against the table. “This is boring.” He tilted his head to look at me. “Okay, what is something you liked at school?” I asked, scanning his work.

Carl looked up, thinking about his response, when his eyes lit up. “Yeah?” “When I could talk to my friends. You know, like I talked to Sophia.” He nodded. I looked over to him as he mentioned Sophia’s name, having to find my breath again. “Mom says Shane is scared of the walkers in the barn.” He started. “But he thinks that Sophia is dead, he wants to leave.” Carl looked down. I placed his book on the table, lifting his chin up so he could look me in the eyes. “Shane is wrong. We are not leaving okay, we will find Sophia.” I started, Carl looking away. “Hey, Carl look at me sweetie.” I called, moving his chin once again to be face to face with him. “We will find Sophia, okay, I can feel it, we’re close.” I nodded, wiping the tear from the corner of his eye, pulling him into a hug. “Okay, how about we do some division before your mom comes back?” I asked as I rubbed his back. He softly nodded against my shoulder.

Carl had flown through his divisions, proving that he was a really smart kid. “Hey you two, how are your math problems coming along baby?” Lori asked, kissing the top of Carls head. “Ew, mom stop.” He laughed trying to wriggle out of her hands.

“Did you do your nines?” She asked, taking a seat on the other side of Carl. “Yes mom, (Y/n) showed me this cool trick that her grandma showed her, its the FMM” “The what? I’m sorry.” “The Finger Multiplication Method, FMM is a better way to say it.” I answered. “I see.” She smiled, trying not to laugh. The door to the farm house had slammed shut, Rick making his way over to where Shane was leaning against the rusted tractor near the barn. The two men stood discussing, more like arguing over what our course of action would be. “Mom, can I go and help T-dog?” “Yeah honey, just don’t leave the camp.” She nodded, watching as he ran over to the RV. “What do you think they’re talking about?” Lori asked, gesturing to her husband and my brother. “Shane is probably trying to defend his wants.” “They need to agree on what to do, they need to make a decision already, it’s tearing the group apart.” She sighed. “What do you think we need to do?” I asked, now facing her. “I don’t think we should rush into anything. I don’t feel safe with those walkers in that barn.” “Lori, neither do I, but I am siding with Rick here.” I paused. “Shane wants to be right, and he is willing to get all of us kicked out of a safe place, a home.” I continued. Lori looked back towards the two men. “Lori, at the end of the day, you have to do what’s the best for you and your family.” “I know.” She nodded. I stood and went to walk away. “Wait, please.” She grabbed my hand. I looked at Lori confused, and sat back down, holding her hand with both of my own.

“Lori, what?” “I need to be honest with you.” “Whats going on?” “Before, at the quarry, before Rick-“ “I know.” I cut her off. “Shane and I-“ “I know.” I nodded my head, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. “How did you know?” She asked. “You and Shane weren’t really discreet.” I smiled. She shook her head, embarrassment covering her face. “It’s okay, I don’t care.” I shook my head, comforting her. Lori took a deep breath. “This baby, is Ricks baby.” “Even if it is Shanes baby, it will never be his baby.” She finished. “And that baby, will be loved, no matter what.” “This baby, will still have an aunt in me either way, Carl does too. You know that.” Lori nodded her head, reaching a hand up and wiping her tears as she hugged me. “Thank you.” She whispered. Lori stood up, and wiped her hands on her jeans. “I uh, I better go and get some vegetables for dinner.” She nodded, leaving to get vegetables.

I walked over to the RV, searching for Dale and Glenn, both of which were missing. “That’s odd.” I whispered to myself, climbing the ladder of the RV, picking up the rifle, pacing around the roof. Rick and Andrea had met at the cars, discussing their route. “Hey, be careful up there!” Glenn called out, running with a cup of water. “I am being careful.” I rolled my eyes. “Just hang on a second! I’ll be up.” Glenn called out, entering the RV, coming right back out and climbing u the ladder, taking the rifle from me. “What were you doing?” He asked after catching his breath. “I was covering your ass.” I paused, looking for Shane. “What happened?” I asked.

“Andrea said something to Dale. He said he needed a minute and asked me to get him some water and that he would keep watch.” “Do you know where he is?” He shook his head. “Do you need help back down?” “No, Glenn. I can manage, thank you.” I smiled, descending the ladder. I looked over to where Andrea and Rick were talking, looking at the maps on the hood of Shane’s Hyundai. “Also shows she could be moving this way south. If Sophia kept in that direction, she might have gotten out of the forest and into the farmland.” Rick Paused, gesturing to the roads. “So we take 74 up to Ivy road, then push down south on foot through the forest till we hit Christopher, go east a couple of miles and then double back.” He finished. I watched as Hershel walked closer to Rick, pulling his sleeves up.

“Rick.” He greeted.

“Hershel. We just have our guns out because we're gonna go look for Sophia.”

“Before you do that, I could use your help with something.”

“Count me in.” Andrea nodded.

“Thank you. But I just need Rick.” Rick looked at Andrea, nodding.

“I’ll be down at the barn keeping watch until you're ready.” She nodded, tucking her gun into the back of her jeans, Rolling the map up. “(Y/n), You wanna join me at the barn?” She asked. “Oh, no. Thank you. I need to talk to Dale.” I smiled. “Okay, Im going to head to the barn. Can you put the mag in the RV?” She asked, holding the map out. “Sure.” I nodded, taking it from her. I took the map and placed it on the table, looking through the books Dale had sitting on one of the benches with a note that said ‘throw away’. I looked through the pile and noticed ‘the wind in the willows’. I smiled and grabbed it, making a mental note to tell Dale I borrowed it, not that he’d mind anyway. I looked around, looking for Carl, who was sitting on the log by the cooking pot, a stick in hand, drawing in the dirt. “Carl!” I called out, getting the young brunettes attention. He smiled as he saw me, standing up, tossing the stick aside. “Yeah?” He asked looking up. “I found this, figured it might help get you through the boredom of camp.” “What is it?” He asked taking the book from my hand. “Just a book I loved when I was your age.” I smiled. “Oh cool, thanks.” He beamed, moving back to his seat, opening the book. I took a seat near the pit and checked our medical supplies, seeing what we need and writing it down. It wasn’t very long until Shane was storming past us.

“Hey, Shane, Can I talk to you for a sec?” Carl called out, making Shane stop and turn as I looked up.

“You okay?” He asked moving towards the boy.

“Yeah. I know you think Sophia's dead. And that we should stop looking for her.” Carl paused. “Bu-But that's bullshit.” He finished.

“Hey, man, watch your mouth.” Shane started getting annoyed. I sat the small box beside me and stood up, ready to intervene.

“We're gonna stay here until we find her.” Carl told him.

“You think that's what we should do?”

“It's what I know we should do.” He confirmed.

“Then we stay. That means we got to do whatever we got to do to make that happen. Hmm?” Shane asked, an idea forming. An idea that wouldn’t be good.

“Like help out with chores?” Carl asked innocently.

“Mmm. Like help out with the chores.” Shane nodded. “Carl. Come here for a minute.” Lori called out, clearly uncomfortable.

“Why don't you go see what your mom wants? Hmm? Go on.” “Hey, Carl. Don't let me hear you talk like that again.” He called out after Carl had left. “He is just a kid Shane.” I spoke. “Yeah well he is a kid that needs to learn his place.” “That makes two of you then.” I crossed my arms. He shook his head and headed for the RV. “Shane!” I followed him. “What?” “What are you going to do?”

“Nothing!” He brushed me off. The closer he got to the RV, the faster he walked. “Sup?” Glenn called down, surrendering his hands as Shane looked at him. Shane walked into the RV and started banging around. “What’s up with him?” Glenn asked. I shrugged and waited for him to come out.

“Son of a bitch!” I heard him mumble, practically running out. He looked up at Glenn.

“You see where he went?” Shane asked. “Who?” Glenn asked. “Don't even try to shit me, okay?” He snapped. “Shane!” “What?” “Dale. Glenn. Did you see where Dale went?” He asked. “Yeah, he asked me to run and get him some water.” “He said he'd cover me on watch.” Glenn finished. “And he was gone when you got back, huh?” “Yeah. You think he's okay?” Glenn asked. “Oh, he's fine.” Shane nodded. “Why'd he bail then?” “So you wouldn't tell me which way he went.” “I don't get it.” Glenn looked at me. I shrugged. “No, man, you don’t.” He stormed off once again.

Glenn looked down at me once more, a questioning look on his face. “I honestly, don’t know.” I sighed. “Something doesn’t feel right though.” I continued as I held my hand in front of my eyes, blocking out the sun. “Isn’t that Daryl and Carol?” Glenn asked, looking over toward the tree line, headed into the forest. “Must be.” I nodded as I watched the two of their silhouettes disappear. “You alright (Y/n)?” Glenn called out. “Yeah, im fine.. Im just tired.” I nodded, taking a seat on Dales camping chair. “Are you sure?” He asked. “Im positive Glenn, Fatigue is a symptom that coincides with pregnancy.” “Oh, right.” He chuckled. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back to rest against the RV, taking five minutes to just try to relax. The sound of Glenn calling out to Maggie, quickly deciding to climb down from the RV. “(Y/n), can you cover me for a minute.” “Of course, go.” “Just don’t climb up there!” He called back, trying to catch up with Maggie. “Im pregnant, not missing a limb.” I called back, starting to climb the ladder. I bent down to pick up the rifle. As I stood back up, my head started spinning, I looked down and my hand had grabbed onto the blue camp chair. I lowered myself down and looked around my as the burred motion of my vision, slowly became more clear. I looked down to my hands, knuckles turning white as I gripped the chair, trying to centre myself. Maybe I should have listened to Glenn. As I turned to look, Glenn had taken and placed the smaller basket to the ground, gesturing around the two of them with his hands. Glenn had finished talking, moving to come back when Maggie had called out to him, walking over and bringing him in for a kiss. I smiled, looking away so I didn’t come across as a creep. Andrea was pacing in front of the barn, occasionally stopping, searching around for Shane, im assuming. “Hey, Thank you.” Glenn smiled as he climbed the ladder, joining me atop the RV. “You’re welcome.” I smiled, handing him the rifle as he held his hands out. “So, Maggie and Patricia have invited us all to the house, I asked Lori, she said we should be fine without someone on watch for a bit.” He smiled, placing the rifle down. “Oh, no, I- I can’t just stay up here.” I shook my head. “Why?” “No reason, I can stay.”

Glenn looked at me, a worried expression on his face.

“(Y/N), what’s going on?”

“It’s fine, its nothing too big.” I sighed. “Im just feeling a little light-headed.” I finished. “What?! I told you to not climb up!” He scolded. “I was fine, until I wasn’t.” “Famous last words.” He shook his head. Glenn looked around, thinking to himself. “Ill go and get some help.” He started to descend the ladder. “Glenn! No! Look, I can get down.” I stated, getting up, moving to the ladder. Glenn was already down and looking up at me. I slowly turned and started to climb down. “See, I can do it. Just have to be slow.” I smiled as my left foot hit the ground. “No more climbing up there.” Glenn shook his head. “Glenn, if I need-“ “No, no more.” He stated, guiding me down to the house. “Okay, fine.” I surrendered. I smiled as I noticed Carl was sitting at the table, with Beth and Patricia. Lori came down and grabbed my hand, taking me a little bit further away from the others. “Rick told Shane.” “About-“ I looked down. “Yeah.” “He thinks Rick isn’t built for this world, doesn’t think that Rick will survive.” “Don’t worry yourself over Shane, Lori. He will get over it. Rick will survive, you know it, I know it, the group knows it.”

“Ill be back, Watch out for Carl?” “Of course.” I nodded, I looked over to see T-dog and Andrea walking over to the house. “Do you know what's going on?” T-dog asked hands by his sides.

“Where is everyone?” Andrea asked. I made my way back over to the group and stood on the step behind Maggie.

“You haven't seen Rick?” Glenn asked Andrea.

“He went off with Hershel.” “We were supposed to leave a couple hours ago.” She finished.

“Yeah you were. What the hell?” Daryl interrupted, joining us, Carol behind him.

“Rick told us he was going out.” Carol spoke out from behind Daryl.

“Damn it. Isn't anybody taking this seriously? We got us a damn trail.” Daryl stated annoyed, throwing his right arm towards the tree line. “Oh, here we go.” He stated as Shane walked toward us. “What's all this?” He pointed at the bag.

“You with me, man?” Shane asked, bringing a pump action shotgun out of the bag.

“Yeah.” Daryl answered, grabbing it and pumping the shotgun, resting it up on his shoulder. “Shane, what do you think you’re doing?” I asked, taking a step down towards him. Shane looked at me, a scowl on his face, looking around at everyone else.

“Time to grow up.” He spoke. “You already got yours?” He looked to Andrea.

“Yeah. Where's Dale?.”

“He's on his way.”

“Thought we couldn't carry?” T-dog asked, taking the gun when Shane handed it to him.

“We can and we have to.” He started. “Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. But now we know it ain’t.”

“Shane, enough.” “How about you, man? You gonna protect yours?” He held out a gun to Glenn. ”That's it. Can you shoot?” He looked to Maggie.

“Can you stop? You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight.” She tried to reason.

“We have to stay, Shane.” Carl stepped forward. Lori rounded the corner and saw Shane and all of the guns.

“What is this?” She asked.

“We ain't going anywhere, okay?” Shane looked to Carl. “Now look, Hershel, he's just gotta understand. Okay? He--well, he's gonna have to.” He stood forward. “Now we need to find Sophia. Am I right? Huh?” Shane knelt in fronton Carl. “Now I want you to take this. You take it, Carl, and you keep your mother safe. You do whatever it takes. You know how. Go on, take the the gun and do it.” Shane nodded, holding the gun out for Carl.

I reached forward and grabbed the gun before Carl could and glared at Shane as Lori swooped in and pushed Carl behind her.

“Rick said no guns. This is not your call. This is not your decision to make.” She spoke firm.

“Oh shit.” T-dog got our attention. I moved forward to take a closer look into what we were witnessing. Along the fence line we watched as Jimmy, Rick and Hershel were leading walkers to the barn. “What is that? What is that?” Shane growled as he pushed past everyone running for the three men by the barn.

“Shane!” Lori and I both yelled, protesting.

The closer he got to Rick and Hershel the more the shouting had escalated. “What the hell are you doing?” My brother shouted.

“Shane, just back off!” Rick tried to talk Shane down.

“Why do your people have guns?” Hershel had asked.

“Are you kidding me? You see? You see what they're holding onto?” Shane had started pointing at the walkers.

“I see who I'm holding onto.” Hershel corrected him.

“No, man, you don’t.” Shane shook his head. I watched as Daryl held the gun up, ready to shoot, Shane

“Shane, just let us do this and then we can talk.” Rick had once again tried to talk Shane out of his rage.

“What you want to talk about, Rick?” “These things ain't sick. They're not people. They're dead. Ain't gonna feel nothing for them 'cause all they do, they kill! These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us.” Shane yelled

“Shane, shut up!” Rick yelled.

“Hey, Hershel man, let me ask you something.” Shane started. “Could a living breathing person, could they walk away from this?” He asked as he shot the female walker three times in the chest. “Shane stop!” I yelled moving forward.

Daryl stood infant of me and pushed me back with his body. “Stay outta this.” He growled. “Keep her here.” He looked at Carol, who had rested her hands on my shoulders, turning back and holding the gun to the walkers head. “No! Stop it!” Rick shouted once more.

“That's three rounds in the chest. Could someone who's alive, could they just take that?! Why is it still coming?” Shane asked Hershel, shooting it another two times. “That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?” He shouted, shooting it two more times. “Shane, enough!”

“Yeah, you're right, man. That is enough.” Shane agreed, walking up to it, shooting it in the head. Hershel dropped to his knees as the walker had fallen, just watching as it lied dead on the floor. “Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone!” He shouted. Carol gasped as Shane mentioned her daughter, hand moving from my shoulders to her mouth. “Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us. Enough. Rick, it ain't like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting right here, right now.” Shane yelled as he ran to the barn. “Take the snare pole. Hershel, take the snare pole. Hershel, listen to me, man, please. Take it now. Hershel! Take it!” Rick shouted, trying to get Hershel to take the snare. Shane grabbed a short handled hoe, bashing against the lock on the barns door. “No, Shane. Do not do this, brother. Wait!” Rick tried to reason.

“Don't do it!” Glenn yelled. “Shane! Enough is enough! Stop it!” I screamed.

Shane had pried the lock off of the door, moving the plank securing it, leaving only the old chains. I looked around, Lori was moving Carl behind her, Maggie was on the ground with her father, her sister with jimmy. It was chaotic, everyone was shouting. The doors started opening, one by one walkers had started to pile out. Andrea and T-dog rushed forward to help Shane on the frontline, next was Daryl running to aide them. My heart ached for the Greene family, Maggie was crying and I watched as Glenn went to comfort her, she nodded and he moved forward joining in on the walker massacre, with regret on his face. Shane looked back, and shot the walker that Rick was still holding, Rick had turned around to check on Carl and his wife before looking back to the shit show in front of us. Gunshots continued to echo over the property as Daryl shot the last walker. Our group had lowered their weapons, looking over the damage they’d just done. The snarls of another walker could be heard and we all waited for it to emerge. My tears instantly fell as the little girl walked out of the barn, Carols cries, magnifying the shock. Carol had ran forward before I could do anything. “Sophia? Sophia! Sophia. Sophia. On no. Sophia. Sophia.” She tried running past Daryl, who had grabbed her and pulled her back, both of them dropping to their knees as she sobbed. “Sophia.” I moved my hand to cover my mouth, as I cried into it, watching as Rick walked forward, raising his gun. I closed my eyes as the last gun shot sounded. The sound of Carols sobs, being branded into my brain.

Series Masterlist Next Part

#daryl dixon #daryl dixion imagine #daryl x you #daryl x reader #daryl fanfiction #The Walking Dead #twd #x reader

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spiralesbian · 4 years

Text

ALRIGHT

here’s my full Stranger Avatar Sasha Archivist timeline:

(also, thanks to @artbyblastweave for being so interested in my lil au!)

SEASON ONE

sasha james is hired as the head archivist of the magnus institute!

her assistants are jon, tim, and martin

tim takes the thematic role of martin (aka getting tormented by my worm wife jane, and stays in the archives)

sasha reads thru statements and is a skeptic! she really does not believe it’s real until jane comes along.

“tim……………………..did you die here?”

“no, but every time i come to work i die a little more inside.”

cute timsha moment in the supply closet tho.

until martin kool-aid-mans through the door and gets them out of there

jon used to work in artefact storage so he hides in there. he’ll be fine

i actually can’t remember how they all get out but they do it KKJSDGFJHD

sasha takes everyone’s statements. tim is fucked up, martin is also fucked up, jon is actually fine though he seems pretty normal about this whole situation most definitely.

sasha realizes this is a bit more than a regular archivist job.

SEASON TWO

sasha gets paranoid of course. she learns more about gertrude because she never got the chance to meet her

she takes a statement from a guy named michael shelley. weird dude. then helen shows up :)

jon is most definitely himself he is just a normal regular grumpy jon i swear :)

sasha starts to manifest her powers a little bit. she doesn’t know it, but she is an avatar of the stranger, and a prisoner of the eye.

she starts to notice more things about jon? similar to this comic but with jon

eventually she + tim + martin help get jon out of the grip of the NotJon. this is my au and i get to choose who dies (it’s no one because i miss the s1 archival assistants too much).

jon is pretty fucked up from this though and at like a season-3-tim mindset already.

fucking goddamn leitner avatar of the fucking whore shows up to trap the NotJon in one of his shitty fucking novels. fuck this guy tho

he’s like Sasha We Must Talk and shes like okay but stay 8 ft away from me at all times you bitch

she leaves the room for 10 minutes and pipe murder occurs. good riddance

wait are the cops in the season i genuinely can’t remember. if they are, their roles don’t change very much. melanie and sasha feud, battle of the bi queens

SEASON THREE:

uh oh! girlie’s be framed for murder! she crashes at her ex gf georgie’s flat. also the admiral is there don’t think i would EVER cut him out of this story

(also jon is georgie’s ex too because i think that would be fun JDHBFHS)

sasha learns abt an upcoming web ritual (mirroring the unknowing), all that shit. gets kidnapped a ton of times, as usual.

helen is like “i am going to kill you because i hate gertrude <3 i was that dumb bitch’s assistant for too long” but michael busts out of the door like Hi Guys and traps her in the hallway.

sasha also gives her statement about a leitner she found as a child that marked her. its a stranger book and we learn her edgy orphan origin story how her parents were both murked by the stranger. fucked up if true!

back at the archives jon is like so fucking tired of this shit honestly and now martin is also pretty paranoid. also jm romance subplot is still very present!

tim is just trying to protect sasha at all times and he’s pissed she keeps leaving the country and getting fucking kidnapped

(remember when jon persuades the traffic cop?) sasha starts to fill her archivist role in a different way. she can shapeshift into the subject of a statement and uses her affiliation with the eye to coerce statements or info out of people. (example: if she needed a live statement from the guy in #90 Body Builder, she could temporarily make herself look like jared hopworth to the guy and ask “what happened to me?” or “what did i do?” and the guy would be like well he built some fucken bodies i guess let me tell you all about it) while reading the statements in america that refuel her, she fully shapeshifts into the statement giver while reading out loud.

once again i truly can’t remember daisy + basira’s roles until the end of the season. also melanie get shot by the ghost at some point

anyways sasha gets kidnapped by trevor and julia and they gerry lays out all the shit for her and she’s like ah! i’m fucked

tim offhand mentions the web ritual to martin and he loses his shit cause he’s marked by the web blah blah this isn’t a web!martin thing i swear i just need someone to fill tim’s role in the ritual and a lonely ritual would be fucking boring as hell as we learned from ass man peter lukas. i hate that man

so they make the plan to stop the web ritual (which is fucking hard when the offense knows your every move) so sasha, basira, daisy, jon, and martin go.

tim stays back at the institute to burn shit and distract elias. elias does some fucked up shit as usual and it makes me sad

the ritual starts! they have a plan to blow it up and run but like. u know how it goes

instead of the unknowing-stranger-dream-sequence, we get everyone kinda mixed up in a huge spider’s web on the big stage and its still quite confusing because this ritual not only manipulates the prey, but also the prey’s perceived reality. the web is also in current control of the buried coffin cause they think that shit is kinda fun. they yeet daisy into it.

hard to describe what happens, but basira keeps her cool, jon is a bit lost in his own mind, sasha tries to use her powers to escape but fails. she manages to get through to martin through the strings and mounds of spiders and she tosses him the detonator.

[squishing spider noises]

SEASON FOUR:

martin doesn't die, i told you i can't kill the og archival assistants! he does lose most of one leg though, he took the blunt of the explosion.

sasha in da hospital in da coma. tim is mad he can’t wake her up and then my man ollie says “ur fucked up mate” and she wakes up

(and because coma jon has such wild hair controversy, i’m establishing that her head was shaved when she was in the coma. it grows back thru s4. it she keeps one side shaved cause she’s cool)

meanwhile tim is recruited by that dumbass man you know who i don’t even wanna say his stupid fucking name

sasha gets daisy out of the buried. they become avatar pals!

(there is the biggest blank in my memory where all of season four should be. at this point i should just relisten to the entire fucking show but i would literally just forget it all again)

melanie says hm. fuck this! and blinds herself. she goes to live with georgie (and that’s the moment jon and sasha realize they are both georgie’s exes FHFHDJD)

tim continues to fight the lonely pull. he thinks that since p*ter l*kas is tied to the institute, he can blind himself out cause melanie was successful. he is wrong. he is also interrupted by elias midway, and only blinds one eye, and loses most of his sight in the other. elias’s hold on him is weak, but this just drives him way farther into the lonely.

gotta be honest i remember the end of season four but like i couldn’t visualize what was happening at the end so i like don’t understand what happened JGDKFJGD but sasha intervenes (???) and peter yeets tim into the lonely (???) and sasha jumps in (??????) after him. elias is just there i guess?

instead of “look at me martin,” sasha finds tim and at this point her form is warped and hard to recognize because of stranger powers, and tim is almost 100% blind, so she says “don’t look at me, see me. see me tim, it’s me.” and finally creates a clear image of herself. “it’s...it’s you. you’re my sasha.”

they break free and go to scotland i guess KHSDDKDSF

idk what happens with jon and martin im losing continuity at this point. fuck it, they smooch <3

“ah these are the statements.”

“yes. basira said last week she’d send some up as soon as the archives weren’t a crime scene. and she wasn’t sure which ones you’ve read already, so she, she just said she’d send a bunch.”

“.........Hello Sasha.”

(alternate ending: personally i think sasha would read through each statement before speaking them aloud cause that’s what i would fucking do, so she would get this statement and be like “lmao tim come look at this elias trying to prank me dumb bitch think i’ll start the apocalypse for him. fucking little puny bitch boy. anyways what do you want for dinner?”)

SEASON FIVE:

“just. listen.”

“...i’m dead. and you have been chosen to be my replacement as head archivist. hopefully, this means you, jon, but if someone else is hearing this, and elias has made a different choice for some reason, then these words are still very much intended for you.”

sasha in full stranger avatar mode and is like 8ft tall and her faces shift a lot as they go through the realms. except the stranger is the second to last one (the panopticon is last obviously).

helen and michael actually talk shit out in the spiral hallway and now they are mlm wlw solidarity and both like tim and sasha are such bi and trans icons <3 this is so fun don’t you love the fearpocalypse <3

oh daisy n basira trapped in the hunt, and jon and martin are trapped in the stranger. wtgfs + the admiral are like in space or some shit idk but they are ok :)

not much to report other than she is my monster wife <3

i really don’t have many theories to how everything in s5 is gonna pan out, and i would like to closely mirror the actual show, so maybe as we get closer to the end i’ll build more on to this! thanks a lot for all the notes on my first sarchivist post!! also if u wanna make art this specific au DEF tag me in it i’d love to see!!

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the-omni-princess · 5 years

Text

Frozen Heart [Chapter 8]

Author: @the-omni-princess

Summary: After the war against Hydra, King Bucky comes home to take what has been promised to him since he was young, you. But he is not the same person as the young boy that you grew up with. Can she break through his tough shell and bring back the young man she once fell in love with? Or will she be forced to marry the monster everyone thinks he’s become?

Word Count: 5.2K

Pairing: King!Bucky x Fem!Reader (Royalty Au!)

Warnings: Absolute and utter fluff!, badass!reader, mild language, a self-harm mention (not reader), Nudity but no smut

A/N:

I’m back! With so much fluff you’ll cry!

So, I have legit like four chapters done so if it all goes well I’ll be posting one a day, plus some one-shots I did!

No smut yet, but I got a one-shot smut Im posting tomorrow and then this series getting smutty :D but 18+ only or you’ll be getting blocked

[Series Masterlist] [Masterlist]

----

Light flooded the once dark room as Natasha opened the curtains. You groaned, turning to your side and pulling a pillow over your eyes. "Five more minutes!" You cried out, your voice gruff with sleep.

Wanda poked her head out of the bathroom to speak, "Rise and shine! You need a bit of a pick-me-up so here I am, your bath is already drawn, and I'll be washing and braiding your hair."

You took a peek from underneath your pillow that sheltered you from the harsh morning light. "With the oils and perfume Pietro brought over?" You asked in a whisper, still desperate for sleep, but slowly being coaxed out of bed.

Wanda nodded, "One time offer so hurry up!"

"I'm coming!" You conceded, stretching your back, and letting the pillow fall off your face.

Five minutes later you were laying in the bath, Wanda washing your hair, her nails scratching your scalp as she shampooed your strands. You groaned softly, melting into her palms as you sipped on your coffee.

"So, y/n," Natasha, who was sitting beside the tub, doing your nails on your free hand, started to say. "How's the King treating you?"

You sighed softly, "I should have known you two were up to something, this sort of pampering only comes before events or when you're buttering me up," you teased. It had been about three months since you had moved up North with Bucky, and the seasons had shifted to autumn, the mountains already had more snow on top of them, bringing the cold to you. Bucky was swept up in work, busy trying to make sure the kingdom had enough in storage to last the winter. In the morning he would rush to meetings, and in the evenings when he could, he would find you around the castle. You were slowly familiarizing yourself in the halls, the passageways had a lot of wrong turns that could throw someone off, which just reminded you of your garden maze back in the South.

So far Bucky had been spoiling you rotten, and despite the multitude of interruptions, he was trying his hardest to spend time with you. He had managed to sneak himself away to give you a silver constellation necklace on a small golden chain, the constellation his birth was tied to, a necklace that never left your neck. He was still working on the greenhouse, but with his help, you managed to fix up the library, including a new window seat with pillows and fur-lined blankets.

You still remember the day you had found his personal study, the place he mentioned he destroyed during a rampage when he first came back from the War. It was an utter mess, books and maps littered the floor, the desk had splintered, and one wall had a hole in it, left behind most likely by his metal arm punching it. You immediately started to clean up the room, and that's how he found you that night, asleep, curled up against the desk, clutching a map of the Southern and Northern Kingdoms, the room mostly cleaned up. He had picked you up and tried to tuck you into bed, but you only buried yourself deeper into his arms, happy for the extra warmth.

You had also begun to bring warmth to the castle, one that you had heard the maids whispering about once. Naturally grown flowers from the nearby village were found in multiple rooms, scented candles from the lovely old lady two villages down the mountain, even representatives from other nations had mentioned the life seeping into the palace. You even had constellation lights added into your chambers, a fact only a select few people knew, and a new book on Morse code since you found out Bucky and Steve learned it in the War.

You had also frequently checked in with Steve, who sent Scott with you since he only trusted a few personal guards with your life, and Scott already knew the Northern Kingdom since his daughter Cassie lived with her mom and stepdad in the North. Steve was also doing perfectly fine as King, making you prouder than ever, and finally had a date with the Lady in court he had been eyeing.

Yet despite the many attempts you had of making this new home, well homely, something always felt missing. Love. Bucky. Always busy, always tiring himself out, wearing himself out too thin, he put the needs of the people and you above his own. You told as much to Natasha and Wanda, the latter having moved on to conditioning your hair now.

"I love him, gods, I absolutely adore him, but he needs to think of himself every once in a while. He has too many duties, taking on everything at once, and I have a feeling that's why you two are currently pampering me," you looked towards Natasha, who had a smirk on her face.

"You're reading my mind, y/n/n," she teased. "A King needs a Queen, henceforth, we are making you one. He has a meeting with his advisors today about increasing the storage for the grains to survive the winter. We both know you have been working on a plan, a good one, but you're too scared to tell him outright."

Wanda combed out your hair, massaging oils into your scalp as she spoke next. "Show everyone you will be a magnificent queen. Today, you're not going to just look like a queen, you're going to act like one. They won't respect you until you show them you're not some show pony princess from the south."

You smiled faintly, "You two are always scheming behind my back, but it is a good idea. Finally, be heard, be in charge, pull some of the weight of the duties off of Bucky, spend more time with him," you sighed and melted against Wanda's magical hands again. "Let's be a Queen." You whispered softly.

You let the two do their utter best, and by the end of it, you looked absolutely regal. A simple pink lace evening dress, and a tiara made of crystals on your head, you held back a proud smirk when you looked at yourself in the mirror. The tiara was made of rose gold, which caught the light when you moved, just enough to catch people's attention without being flashy. You finished the look with the constellation necklace Bucky had given you, which shone brightly against the pink lace.

You pushed your shoulders back, and held your head up high, deciding to use your best regal look, one you had perfected over the years. You entered the strategy room, all eyes going towards you. Advisors circled the table, maps, and plans along the table, with Bucky at the head of the table. Everyone was standing and considering the red faces of more than one advisor, you had interrupted a rather heated fight. You locked eyes with Bucky, who instantly smiled as he saw you, the cold expression he had when you walked in had melted just at the sight of you.

You took your time walking towards his side of the table, standing towards his left as you would if you were seated on thrones, taking your time to address the table. "Good afternoon, my Love," you happily kissed Bucky's now clean shave cheek. He had decided to go for the haircut and shaved after all, with hair just long enough for you to get your hands through it. You then turned to the advisors, "Good afternoon everyone, I have decided to join you all." You smiled warmly, leaving no room for disagreement, full well knowing you would still get some. Bucky looked at you a bit confused but also in awe, taking in the new order in stride, trusting you fully.

His advisors, however, weren't as welcome. "With all due respect, princess, we are speaking about a matter that does not concern you," a white-haired official spoke up, you recognized as Baron Ross. Despite Bucky's surprise of your presence, he knew Natasha and Scott had been teaching you everything to know about Northern Politics, including all the nobles and advisors in court, and who to be wary of.

"Well, Baron Ross, it does concern me. I may have been born in the Southern Kingdom, but the people of the Northern Kingdom will be my people soon enough. Unless you are saying that feeding said people is a topic that should not concern the leader of the people, I should and will be here." You kept your head held up high, determined not to show the fear in your heart that they wouldn't like you. It doesn't matter what they think, you reminded yourself, Bucky chose you and that's all that matters.

Another representative, one you couldn't see, spoke up. "Then what do you suppose you could do about the problem at hand? What could you possibly know about the situation?"

You bit back the growl growing in the back of your throat, Bucky wasn't as suppressed, you could see him tense, no doubt about to lash out at the man who questioned your ability. You gently placed your hand on top of his metal hand that was gripping the table. He visibly relaxed, as the metal had sensors to fire into his nerves, something you had asked Shuri once, and your very touch soothed him.

"Well, I know you have all been bickering about the food storage for the past month. Quarreling like children will only hinder the people instead of yourselves as we all know the Royal and Noble silos have been full for months. Besides, I've been working on a solution that will help the people that all parties should benefit from." You effectively shut the rest of the table up, and all eyes were on you as you explained your idea. Halfway through, Bucky had intertwined your hands together, letting you take charge of the room with his silent support. By the time they closed for the day, you had a fully functional plan and agreement in place that suited everyone's needs while also helping the kingdom.

You walked hand in hand with Bucky, who was in complete awe of you. "You were absolutely amazing, My Love! You going to be a magnificent Queen, you practically already are one!" He gushed, making you blush.

"Took a little push from my ladies but they were right, it's time I help ease the burden upon your shoulders, My Love," you kissed his cheek playfully, glancing behind you towards the personal guards flanking you, new ones you noticed. "What shall we do with our new free time?"

His face lit up, no doubt a grand idea forming in his head. "Follow me, it's time I introduce you to somebody," he sounded excited, already tugging you outside to where the Royal animals were kept.

He whistled once inside, his grip on your hand faltering as he took a step forward. A flash of pure white bounded towards the two of you, jumping into Bucky and knocking him backward. You yelped as his hand was ripped away from you, but all you could hear was his laughter as he wrestled with the white fur on top of him. It took you a moment to realize it was a pure white wolf attacking Bucky with kisses. He finally managed to sit up, and your heart melted at the sight before you. The juvenile wolf was still nipping at him, kissing his face, and yipping happily as he rubbed her ears and muzzle. A breathless Bucky looked up towards you, the bundle of fur managing to tire herself out, now curled up in his lap, definitely too big to fit there but managing to crush him anyway. "This is Aurora, my wolf, she's still a pup but she's already fiercely loyal, and ball of energy," he cooed at the wolf pup, who just whined and nuzzled into the hand scratching her ear.

You knelt beside the two, noticing how the wolf bared her teeth towards you as you got closer to Bucky. "She's absolutely beautiful," you said softly. Bucky gently took your hand in his own, presenting it to the wolf. She sniffed at you warily before nudging your palm with her muzzle. Bucky led your hand, gently brushing the wolf's fur. She was softer than most of the furs in your bed, and soon she closed her eyes, trusting that Bucky wouldn't let you hurt her. She whined softly, and as Bucky let your hand go, she relaxed against your hand, happily letting you scratch behind her ears. Bucky couldn't help but smile, overjoyed Aurora loved you. You sat beside him, Aurora nudging herself onto your lap to enjoy your affection. You cooed at the wolf, "You're such a good girl, aren't you? Such a good Wolfie, so soft and pretty!" The wolf in question melted against you, practically purring in your arms.

Bucky whistled, and her ears perked, but she stayed contentedly in your arms. "She loves you more than me!" He accused dramatically.

You laughed, shrugging, "I'm just that amazing," you teased, giving Bucky a toothy grin.

He chuckled, standing up, "There's someone else you need to meet," when you looked up, you noticed how nervous he was. He tried whistling again, a different tone, and Aurora slowly got up, still looking towards you with her golden eyes. She curled into a ball beside you but now off of your lap, causing Bucky to groan. "Yep, you're definitely the favorite."

You giggled, running your fingers through her fur as she whimpered happily. "So, who is this new person I need to meet?" You asked happily, grinning up at him.

He smiled bashfully, "Wait here, close your eyes, My Love," he leaned over and kissed your temple just as you closed your eyes. You had your hands on your lap, hearing him shuffling around, and the voice of one of the animal keepers. He came back towards you and placed something small and furry in your arms before taking a step back. "Open your eyes, My Queen," he whispered into your ear, goosebumps raising, and a shiver ran down your spine.

You looked down, gasping softly at the small bundle of grey and black fur, a tiny wolf pup in your arms. You cooed, the pup looking up at you with bright blue eyes, which were just a shade lighter than Bucky's eyes. "Aw! You're the sweetest little thing!" You kept cooing, happily holding the pup close. She whined softly, relaxing into your arms, making you smile warmly at the pup. "What's her name?" You looked up at Bucky who was currently taking a picture of you and the pup, his own heart melting as he saw the bundle of fur curl into your body warmth. "Raine," he said with a grin, already putting his phone away and sitting beside you again. "It means Queen. This cutie was born four months ago, and we were waiting for her eyes to open so she could meet you. In another month, she starts her training and before you know it, she'll be attached to your hip like Aura is to me." He was smiling proudly, and the pup whined softly, diverting your attention to the pup.

"You precious pup!" You kissed the wolf's head, who just whimpered, nudging her muzzle into your cheek. You showered the pups with kisses and affection, practically purring loving words towards them. Both wolves eagerly soaked up your affection.

"Technically, she's supposed to be a wedding gift, but I could help myself." Bucky tenderly pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear, smiling warmly towards you.

You launched at him, hugging him and kissing him gently, careful of the wolf pup in your arms. "Thank you! A million times, thank you, Bucky. She's absolutely precious! I love her so much, and I love Aurora so much, and most of all I love you so much!" You gushed, grinning at him.

He gave you a goofy smile, absolutely enamored by you, and he noticed the wolf pup yawning in your arms. "I believe it's this little one's bedtime," he kissed your temple once you two broke apart, and you stood gingerly, still clinging to the pup, walking beside him to put the pup to bed, Aurora staying close to your legs. "And you're welcome, My Moon and Stars," you grinned at the new pet name, your smile making him melt. You put the pup into the fur bed, Aurora curling herself around the pup protectively. "Aura practically adopted her," Bucky explained, taking your hand in his, smiling as the two of you walked back into the castle.

"They are absolutely gorgeous," you grinned up at him, holding yourself close to him. "What should we do now, My Love," you said softly, following him towards his chambers.

"How about a movie? We can finally watch that other movie you wanted me to watch, Moana, and I made sure that we both have tomorrow off." You said goodnight to the guards posted at the door to his chambers, grinning as the doors closed behind the two of you.

"So, an entire day with you all to myself?" You teased him, pressing yourself against the ornate wooden doors. "Sleep in, relax all day, kiss all day," he followed suit, leaning against you, your chests pressed together.

He tenderly laid his forehead against yours, your lips ghosting past each other. "I have a picnic I want to take you on, on this beautiful spot I think you'll adore."

Your lips curled up in a smile, "I'd love that," your hands ran up his chest, mapping his muscles out. "Kiss me, Bucky," you whispered softly, locking eyes.

He tilted your chin up, moving the inch closer to your lips, your lips melding against his. He pressed against you harder as you deepened the kiss; you sucked on his bottom lip, smirking at his resulting groan. His hands wrapped around your wrists, pinning them against the door, making your heart skip a beat.

You broke the kiss, taking a deep gulp of air, your chest heaving against him. Your corset wasn't really helping matters, the restrictive material making it hard to breathe. Bucky noticed, yelping as he took a step back, letting your arms go. "Shit, you can't breathe!" He fussed, his hands freezing right above the lace of your dress.

You nodded, "It's okay, help me out of this thing, before you try taking my breath away again," you teased. You walked a bit into the room, turning and shifting your hair to the side to expose the strings of the dress and corset underneath. You looked over your shoulder, Bucky standing there, frozen in place, unsure what to do. "It's okay Buck, I trust you," you encouraged him.

He stepped closer, but still didn't grab the strings. "I don't want to make you think you have to do anything you're uncomfortable with," he spoke in a meek voice.

"Like I said, My Love, I trust you. If I want you to stop anything, I'll tell you. If you think it's too far, just ask me and I'll answer," you gently led his arms to the edge of the strings. He nodded, tugging the beginning of the strings loose, you let out a harsh breath, instantly feeling better.

"May I kiss your skin, My Moon and Stars?" He whispered softly, his breath hot against your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.

You managed a weak "yes," your body ready to relax against him in total trust. You felt his lips against your neck, just against your pulse point. You moaned softly, the gentle touches lighting your skin on fire. As he tugged more strings loose, he lightly kissed your neck and shoulders. Your eyes fluttered close, melting against him. "Tell me more about courting traditions," you murmured softly.

Bucky chuckled behind you, a bit confused by the complicated corset, but getting the hang of it. "Well, a courting starts with a silent promise written down. The person being courted can only read that promise during their wedding ritual. Any gender can start it towards any other gender and technically at any age, but it typically is done when they are both of age. Courting can take months, or years, or longer. Like how Dum Dum and his wife started courting when they were thirteen, and they married when he came back from the war." He loosened the last few strings of the dress, and you let it fall, now only in the corset and your panties.

"Keep going," you whispered softly. You felt Bucky nuzzle into your neck, kissing any skin he could find while he continued loosening the corset and speaking.

"The person doing the courting spoils the courted person, proving to them and to others that they can provide for them, physically, spiritually, mentally," he paused, kissing right below your ear on your soft spot, making you purr beneath him. "Sexually," he finished the corset strings, which had just enough give to stay on your body.

"Care for a bath instead of a movie? We don't have to do anything," you quickly added, letting your hand slip into his hair, gently carding through the strands. "You could tell me more about the rituals," you mumbled before noticing how silent he was at your idea. "What's wrong, My Love?" You asked softly, turning and quickly holding his face in your hands, running your thumbs across his cheeks soothingly.

He melted against your palms with a small sigh. "You won't like what you see when I am not clothed," he whispered softly. It didn't take a genius to realize he was ashamed of his scars.

"Nonsense, I love you, not for your looks but for your heart," you pressed a tender kiss to his forehead. "We don't have to, this isn't just about my comfort, it's also about yours. Let me hold you close, all of you," he looked down towards you, smiling faintly before nodding.

"I trust you," he whispered softly. Your heart melted, you knew he didn't give out his trust freely, as his trust was more guarded than his heart. You two had made your way to the bathroom, and you turned on the water to the bathtub, turning back towards him as it filled.

You kissed his nose playfully, "No hanky panky," you teased, unbuttoning his shirt.

He chuckled, nodding, "No hanky panky," he mumbled.

You smiled warmly, already letting your hands gently push back his shirt. He visibly tensed as you exposed his left shoulder. The scars where metal met flesh were angry and red, and months of watching the healers patch up others could tell you it was partially self-inflicted. You kissed the scar gently, gauging his reaction. He relaxed just a smidge as he closed his eyes, surrendering fully to you. You let the shirt fall to the floor, kissing every scar along his shoulders and collarbones. His chest was an array of multiple scars and burns; you didn't stop to think about what caused all of them, it was all in the past.

"These scars aren't ugly, My Love. They are your own constellations. They are a map of your past. They mean that you are strong, and you survived terrible things, that you are a warrior." You saw him start to relax as you kiss more scars, practically whimpering as you kissed his skin. His body was well sculpted, made from the gods, is all you could think. Pure muscle, toned, golden skin; you let your hands happily explore his chest and stomach, lightly mapping him out.

Eventually, he melted against you, accepting that you weren't running away or scared. His hands found their way to your hips, running up your back and tugging at the strings of your corset. "May I see you as well, My Love?" he murmured softly against at the shell of your ear. You nodded, biting your lip as he tugged the last string free, letting the corset fall, leaving you in only your panties and the constellation necklace around your neck.

You were a bit insecure, your arms crossing against your chest as you looked away. Bucky's hands stopped you, gently moving your arms away before tilting your face up to see him. "You're absolutely beautiful, doll," he spoke softly. Your nipples hardened from the cold air, a small shiver running down your spine as goosebumps raised on your skin. He chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to your collarbone, "Absolutely perfect," he mumbled. You whimpered softly, your eyes fluttering close at his touch. He ran his hands down your body, before they found their way to your hips, tugging you in as Bucky pressed his lips against your own. That was heaven, you decided. Soft lips of velvet and a faint taste of coffee and vanilla, you loved kissing Bucky.

Your hands stopped the water in the bath, before blindly tugging at his pants as you kissed him, his hands curling against the band of your panties. A few moments later you both stood naked in front of each other, unknowingly both nervous about what the other would think. You locked eyes with Bucky, gently taking his hand and leading him to the bath. He sat in the warm waters first, leading you in the tub. You sat between his legs, happily leaning against his chest, your fingers already tracing patterns into both of his arms.

Nothing about what you two were doing was sexual, both of you needed the intimacy with each other, reassuring the other was really there. "Tell me more about courting," you whispered softly, leaning your head on Bucky's shoulder.

He smiled warmly behind you, wrapping his arms around your stomach to keep you close. "Well, there are cases of mutual courtship, where both parties spoil each other," he spoke softly, one of his hands leaving your stomach to run through your hair.

"There is?! Why didn't you tell me? I would love to spoil you," you whisper-yelled, turning in his arms.

He chuckled, nuzzling his nose into your neck. "Your very presence spoils me. You're my Northern Star, Doll," he whispered softly.

"I never got the chance to ask you what that means," you carded your fingers through his hair, unknowingly soothing him, his eyes closing.

"There's a part of my story I haven't told you yet, My Love," he kissed your exposed neck, smiling faintly as you purred beneath him. "I've been in love with you since we were younger, the beautiful princess I couldn't get enough of. I had a lot of flings when we were younger because I thought you could never be mine, even engaged I thought you'd only see me as your husband out of necessity and not love. During the war, once Steve rescued me I sat for a month, waiting, healing. During that month I read through every letter you had sent me during the time I was gone, and Stevie even let me read his, all of his mentioned me in some way. It took me the middle of a war, already losing everything, to realize you loved me the way I loved you. After the war and multiple mental breaks, all Steve had to do was mention you and it set me right again. You, doll, guide me back home just by existing, you're my Northern Star." You practically melted into his arms as he spoke, gently curling his hair around your fingers. "Sometimes I believe the reason the crown fell onto my head was so that it may also fall upon yours. The kind yet fierce, loyal and brave, intelligent and beautiful Princess. The woman who was born to be a Queen," he murmured into your neck, goosebumps raising where his breath fanned across. "The sexiest woman in the world, the woman who owns my heart."

You practically whimpered in his arms. You were right, you most definitely would not survive lovemaking with him. He kept his metal hand firm on your lower stomach, dangerously close to your core, which sent heat directly towards it. You tensed, feeling his right hand at your rib, just a hair below your breast. "I promised not to try anything," he whispered softly, both hands freezing, "I just want to hold you."

His voice soothed you, and you relaxed against him. "I trust you, truly I do, I've just never... I haven't..." You fumbled for words. Your cultures were very different from each other. In the Southern Kingdom, practically every one of Noble birth waited until marriage, while in the North it wasn't expected of Nobles to do as such, in fact, most didn't.

"You've never had sex before. I understand, doll," he reassured softly. "I will wait for you. Whether it's on our wedding night or even afterward, I'll wait an eternity for you. I'll never push you to do something you don't want to."

You felt hot tears build up in your eyes, you quickly blinked them away, feeling nothing but absolutely loved. Every time you thought you were at the peak of your love for Bucky, he proved you wrong, you couldn't stop loving this man and he kept proving he absolutely adored you. "I want to, and I want you, wholly and fully. I just don't want my first time in a bathtub." You teased lightly, a yawn almost breaking your words. You nuzzled closer to him, your eyes suddenly feeling heavy.

He chuckled behind you, the vibrations sending warmth throughout your body. "Rest, My Love, I'll tuck you in bed, and we have tomorrow off, remember? All the sleep you want," he kissed your temple lovingly, reaching over and tugging the drain loose.

He stood, quickly grabbing a towel and wrapping it around you, picking you up bridal style. Your eyes closed, content in his arms, quickly approaching sleep. "What clothes would you like, My Love?" you hummed in acknowledgment but smiled playfully, tucking yourself deeper into his arms and not answering. He sighed softly, "You little troublemaker," he teased, slowly placing you under the covers of his bed. You whined when he pulled away, much to his amusement. He kissed your hair, smiling as he smelled your lavender shampoo, "I'll be right back, promise," he whispered softly.

He quickly dried off, tossing on a pair of boxers before joining you in bed. You quickly found his body warmth, snuggling closer to him, letting the blanket between you get pushed away. You weren't scared to be completely naked in his arms, fully trusting he wouldn't try anything, you just weren't quite ready (well frankly have the energy) to do anything tonight.

He pulled blankets and furs above the two of you, elated to wrap his arms around you. He kissed your temple, making you purr in your dazed state. He chuckled, thinking you looked positively adorable. "Goodnight and sweet dreams, My Northern Star," he whispered softly, his voice luring you into a restful sleep.

TAGS:

Frozen Heart Tags:

@jsmith509 / @lumar014 / @littlemissporter / @kaylaphantomhive

@damnbuckyishot / @aveatquevale- / @booksbeforebois

@marvelgirl7 / @minetticatinwonderland

Bucky Tags:

@cassandras-musings / @darkness-doughter / @novaddictx

(Striked out means it wouldn't tag you)

For a tag, just reply/comment, if I don’t see it, just message me. Tell me what you think! Literally, any comment makes me happy! Like, comment, reblog, interact <3

#Frozen Heart #bucky barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes #bucky x reader #princess!reader #king!bucky #royalty au #arranged marriage AU #childhood friends to lovers #My writing

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devourer--of--books · 4 years

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Remember that one time I wrote a Tangled AU?

Context

During 2016, I submitted a few stories for Tagatha Ship Week. Not my best work, but some of my most known works nonetheless. Amongst those, I had a Tangled AU that was originally meant to be a one shot (which has been deleted because sweet lord that was bad), then turned into a draft for a multichapter story and then turned into this cursed WIP I completely forgot about, which you can find on both Ao3 and FF.net under the name of ‘blinking in the starlight’.

Every once in a while someone comes across it, as it was the case with ‘if you’re not the bride’ and it would remind me of its existence. But unlike IYNTB, I have no interest in rewriting it or continuing this story.

A few weeks ago I found the original draft for ‘blinking in the starlight’ in my dad’s old computer, so I thought I might do a post no one asked for (some people did, you guys are great, humoring me like that) on what the plot was supposed to be.

But after sitting with it I wasn’t fully satisfied (as usual, fml). So, like the clown that I am, I decided that since we are already here, might as well make it into an actual AU post, mind my language, I’m frustrated.

Blinking In The Starlight: Tangled AU

Okay, so I’m gonna presume that you read the WIP, so if you didn’t, maybe check that out first and then come back to this post. Or don’t, it’s not like it’s a very complex narrative anyway.

Many, many years before this story starts, there was a cruel sorcerer named Rafal.

He tormented the Endless Woods for centuries, extorting kingdoms and stuff, you know, very much a two-dimensional character whose motivations I definitely did not think through. Being evil I guess?

No one could defeat him, because he always somehow ended up knowing the traps were coming and was two steps ahead. No one knew how, so they just like, presumed it was because he was psychic or something.

Until one day, a young vain prince named Arthur of Camelot decides to order a hunt to the big blue falcons, to get their feathers as a present to the girl he was courting, one Lady Guinevere.

Would you believe those birds were Rafal’s spies? Now that everyone was hunting them, they could no longer listen in as easily.

So when Prince Arthur campaigns against Rafal’s evilness and challenges him to a duel in which he tricks the sorcerer and defeats him, stripping him of most his powers (and therefore his immortality), everyone was shook

Don’t ask me how he did it, I honestly do not know

But instead of killing Rafal, Arthur agrees to spare his mortal life as long as he gives him a powerful love potion for Guinevere and never shows his face around Camelot ever again.

Rafal is pissed, but says sure why not, because he knew Arthur would be crushed once the potion effects wore off and Guinevere left him anyway

So yeah, they became King and Queen, everyone thinks Rafal is dead, Camelot became known as the guardian kingdom of the Endless Woods alliance, yada yada.

Meanwhile, Rafal, now mortal and still pissed af, looks for a way to get his immortality back, because he is now old and tired all the time.He goes to one of his oldest allies and they tell him a rumor about a woman named Vanessa who found a way to stay young forever using a bird.

It takes a few years for him to track her down, but when he does, he tries to convince her to show him the bird. Vanessa is like that sounds like a you problem, so he threatens her and she tells him she ate it to save her life during her pregnancy (do not ask me how this works, why she couldn’t have healed herself like usual, I don’t know okay)

Rafal is pissed again, because Vanessa was still looking young, so either she lied or she was omitting something and decides you know what, screw you and murders everyone, trying to find the damned bird.

But then he hears soft singing from the closet. A little girl named Sophie, who apparently had inherited the bird’s ability to restore youth.

First, he thinks of raising her as his daughter. But then, one day she’d try to leave him for a boy, so he decides to trick her into thinking he was that boy, so she’d never want to leave him.

He sells her this bullshit story about everything being a fairytale like the ones her books, makes himself look like a teenager and tells her he is now going to take care of her because they are true loves and whatnot

Using the money from his previous evilness (why am I like this), he builds a tower and gaslights the hell out of her telling her is was to keep the danger outside, when actually he was caging her in. Her guards are all mercenaries and her maids are kidnaped slaves so, hm, that’s nice

He keeps visiting her to restore his youth, but he needs the macguffin Arthur used to take away his immortality (I didn’t specify what it was in my draft, so let’s say its Excalibur, for the sake of storytelling) to restore his full greatness, so he starts a long-long-plan to overthrow Camelot once he gets him hands on the sword.

However, Sophie is a person of her own, even being manipulated and gaslighted. She wants to go outside and see the world. Obviously Rafal won’t let her, and even gives her a ring to summon him and stuff, so she won’t think about going anywhere out of his sight.

But she ends up doing it anyway because she’s Sophie

Now hold on a minute.

Back in Camelot, Arthur has already died, Guinevere ran off with Lancelot and Tedros is a brat, walking around with Excalibur (not knowing how powerful it actually is) playing glorified police officer for the royal guard as a way to prove he’ll be a good king someday.

Festival season is approaching and prince Teddy is on a man-hunt (woman-hunt?) for the thief that has been ambushing noble carriages.

They have some good banter, but the thief always manages to distract him and get away.

Guess who is the thief

It’s Agatha, leave me alone, I was 15 and loved cliches, shut up

Yes, I know I’m now almost 19 and still love cliches, moving on

Agatha is stealing money from the rich like a robin hood pro, because festival season is expensive and poor people need to eat okay

But prince-holier-than-thou keeps showing up so she decides to be petty and steal directly from him. Girl just wanted some gold, but ends up with Excalibur because Tedros is an idiot

So he chases her through the woods for days on end, hot on her trail, and Aric gets caught on the crossfire between them. Agatha presumes from his uniform that there is a castle near and decides to hide there.

Tagatha ends up in Sophie’s tower, and she hides Excalibur to bargain with them.

She strikes a deal with Tedros to show her the festival in exchange for Excalibur.

Agatha is just f this shit im out, she didn’t want the sword in the first place and last thing she needs is going to Camelot with a pseudo-police-officer.

But then Tedros realizes he doesn't know how to go back to Camelot and Sophie makes him promise not to turn Agatha in. Agatha is still skeptical, so he promises to lift taxes for the lower classes and she agrees to be their unofficial guide back to Camelot.

Princes can't break promises, don’t ask

The three of them escape the tower.

Shenanigans ensue.

There’s a scene of Agatha helping people in a tavern and Tedros is like???? she nice????

Sophie finding out that the old wizard from her story was the guy King Arthur supposedly killed and doubting Rafal’s lies.

There’s Tedros explaining his need to be just and abide by the laws all the time due to the pressure of his father’s rep after the three of them nearly die of hypothermia (?)

Sophie telling them about her talent.

Very wholesome really.

Meanwhile tho, Aric finally manages to alert Rafal that Sophie left, and Rafal summons his birds to look for her, figuring out that she had Excalibur (how? Idk)

When the trio reaches Camelot, it’s still a few days before the festival. Agatha says she is done and needs to be on her way, but Tedros (softly, may I add) asks her to stay, at least until the lantern scene/day/tradition/thingy

Their unspoken feelings are all over the place and Sophie decides to play matchmaker.

They stay in an inn (why did Tedros not sneak them into the castle, you ask? I don’t know, don’t ask) and Sophie makes the guy tell them there is only two rooms. She then makes up some balloney about wanting to be by herself, so Agatha and Tedros share a room.

Yeah, you know what I’m doing, don’t you: there’s only one bed.

Some other tropes for a very fluffy chapter equivalent of the score of Kingdom Dance, which is my favorite song in the Tangled Soundtrack, fight me, is such a good ‘falling in love montage’ song

But the fluff doesn’t last long, because the very night of the festival, just as you can almost hear Tagatha singing ‘and at last I see the light’, Rafal’s birds find Sophie and take off her ring by force.

Rafal crashes the festival, stealing Excalibur from Sophie and unleashing his coupe against Camelot, back to being immortal and super over-powered.

He throws Sophie back in her tower, and when she doesn't comply and asks him to stop we have a ‘I never loved you’ ‘you were always just a bird to me, a dumb bird’ moment and Sophie is just destroyed because aside from her new friends (whom she believed were dead) Rafal is all she has.

Back in Camelot, complete mayhem is being wrecked, bloodshed and stuff. Agatha manages to rescue Tedros before his execution and they figure out that they need to rescue Sophie and get Excalibur to kill Rafal for good.

“Insert part one of TLEA here”, bitch, I kid you not, that’s exactly what I wrote wtf even is this draft

Somehow it all leads into this big confrontation, in which Sophie strips Rafal of his immortality using the sword but can’t bring herself to kill him. So she asks Tedros to do it, so he can prove himself to his kingdom.

I do not know where Agatha is during this, but I’m pretty sure she’s like, fatally wounded or something

Rafal reveals to Tedros why Arthur spared his life the first time and offers him a potion to make Agatha return his (already mutual, you idiot) feelings.

Tedros is like, nah, I’m gonna kill you, and Rafal is like are you sure she won’t just ride off and leave you like your mama?

And Tedros is just, honestly, man, I’m not, but I’m not gonna force her. Then some analogy about caging birds and Rafal is dead.

Yey, happy ending.

So Tedros and Agatha are left in this limbo, because she poor and she a criminal and he a prince.

Tedros decides to have Agatha take the glory of killing Rafal to redeem her in the public eye, grants her a title, she makes Sophie her lady-in-waiting and they all live happily ever after the end.

#school for good and evil #The School for Good and Evil #school for good and evil series #blinking in the starlight #sge #Sophie of Woods Beyond #Agatha of Woods Beyond #tedros of camelot #Tagatha #tagatha ship week 2016 #Rafal

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withallthingslove · 5 years

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the handmaid’s tale s2ep11 thoughts

under the cut because spoilers

overall a pretty decent episode. it felt very much like old handmaids tale which was nice

this show’s pattern seems to be very slow start and then everything happening at the end

eleanor is quickly adding to my list of favorite characters in this show. Even if she is unstable i love that she sees through the bullshit and knows that even though lawrence was raped in this situation as well that june was raped because of him and the society he created. eleanor sees through everything in gilead and i love it

june saying she wants to kill him too you go queen

the scene with lawrence and june drinking.... while june is a motherfucking badass and she has bounced back from hitting rock bottom i dont think she’s well. and lawrence knows that too which is why he made the mental health comment. this season is definitely about changing june. there have been hints of it in previous seasons but this is when she goes through more of a personality transformation

wow the marthas really run gilead we stan

i think it’s pretty obvious from the start that serena is setting up fred. the way she said goodbye to rita, she knew she wasnt coming back. and I think her beginning nerves were because she was nervous about what would happen to fred not really tuello betraying her

and of course fred is his cocky normal self but its heightened even more when they are alone. I’m conflicted on how serena acted with fred... part of me thinks she still loves him. Because they’ve always been this delusional power-hungry team that have a connection. But then part of me viewed it like the end of the wolf of wall street where margot robbie’s character gets leo’s character to fuck her one last time and butters him up and then shes like “i want a divorce”

the scene in the woods with them at the econo family’s house was beautifully shot. the scenery, the camera work. beautiful. The conversation that took place... solidified more to me serena was setting him up. It seemed like she was saying goodbye in a way. She brought up what she was unhappy with and reminisced with him, and when he said he didnt need to live in dc i didnt believe him and i dont think she did either

but fred admitting he was sterile..... um wow if he wasnt such a terrible human i would be proud of his character development

more proof serena was planning to cross him though is that her reaction was very sad instead of like rushing to comfort him

glad they didnt show the waterfords having sex because honestly dont need that in my life and any scene of them doing it is a waste of time to me

for a second i freaked out when it looked like lawrence had abandoned them because i hadn’t read that in the spoilers for the episode

are they coming after lawrence because of his liberal tendencies? or because he wasn’t performing the ceremony?

june walking through jezebels like she owns the place. i love her confidence

the bartender being concerned about beth made me happy i feel like she’s really well liked and i hope nothing bad happens to her

also the bartender knowing about lawrence robbing all the museums is another good way of showing he isnt really that much better than the other commanders considering fred and serena did the same thing

ugh winslow....

june trying to give herself the speech and then snapping. It’s interesting because in one way it shows she has lost her humanity the way emily and moira had. one thing about june in the book was that she always “kept her humanity” and that was shown in the second season when june couldnt bring herself to kill the waterfords. But the longer june stays in gilead the more unhinged she becomes. BUT I would also argue she has more humanity now because she cant suppress her disgust anymore and so she reacts. So while its more unhinged I think its also more like a new aspect of her personality being born

love that the martha helped her and that the marthas literally cleaned up the entire scene they really are bomb ass bitches. QUEENS

lawrence giving june the gun.... what are they gonna do shoot off whoever comes to the house? or is that for when they try to escape

if june is staying and not escaping after this season i could see her truly going underground/on the run at the end of the season and not going to someone’s house to be a handmaid

mmmmmm tuello is fine and still stand by the idea that he and serena will fuck

fred immediatly doesnt trust him which is actually smart of fred but i also think that it was more fred was insecure about himself and projected. not that he felt something was up. just my personal opinion

fred is such a dick the way he yelled at tuello once they parked but its the way ive seen every privileged white man get mad about anything small so it was perfect delivery

when tuello said they had crossed into canada and all the soldiers came out... YESS WE STAN A KING

It was so satisfying for tuello to say what fred was being arrested for as the americans looked on. SOOOO satisfying

As for Serena.... I think my question from earlier was answered in how she looked at him. She does still love him and so part of her felt terribly guilty for playing him. So the way she was treating fred earlier was because she does love him still but also knew she was betraying him

For the next few episodes... im guessing serena defected and gave fred up or gave them both up hoping doing so would let her see holly. Which ugh. If this season ends with serena in hawaii with holly instead of nick and june in hawaii with holly im gonna fucking riot.

anyway based on the preview moira, luke and holly visit fred and serena and fred is in a jail cell and its said serena betrayed him. but I couldn’t tell if serena was in a jail cell too. My guess is kind of what i predicted earlier in the season and that serena’s long term plan when she left canada was not to get holly back to gilead but was to find a way to leave gilead and take holly with her so i imagine she will try to get custody of holly ughhhhh.

If nick and june can’t be there to parent her then luke and moira should. not serena

im interested to see what happens in the next few episodes because so far this season has been all over the place and so who knows how it will end (i know some of what will happen but not everything and i want more spoilers)

#the handmaid's tale #the handmaid's tale spoilers #handmaid's tale #june osborne #elisabeth moss #serena joy waterford #yvonne strahovski #nick blaine #max minghella #joseph fiennes #fred waterford #bradley whitford #commander lawrence #tht #thtspoilers #tht spoilers #mine #hulu

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crowsent · 5 years

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👶,⭐,💘, and💻. Love you!!

thank you for ask anon! writer ask game is here if yall wanna send in something. still taking asks for these btw

👶- advice for new writers =

yall this is hella fucking generic but PRACTISE. theres a reason almost literally every writer on tumblr gives the advise of “practise practise practise” and that reason is it works. practise doesnt mean ‘oh just write bc youll automatically get better over time’ it means ‘write bc if you dont, you wont figure out what you need to improve.’ did yall know that i literally had no sentence variation in the past? i started every sentence with [character name] or [character pronoun] and i didnt realise until i was 15/16 and i only realised bc i started writing a lot.

i think there’s a fear of failure with new writers. there’s this lingering doubt of “what if its not good?” and boy howdy i will answer that question right fucking now. it wont be good. when i compare my current work to my earlier work, my earlier work sucked fucking shit. i spelled soldier with a fucking ‘j’ and i had no idea what the hell a point of view was. and thats okay. whoever tells you that youre going to perfect writing is a fucking liar. there is no perfecting writing. 20 years from now, imma look at the writing from today and im gonna think it sucks shit. writing is a process. its a craft. you get better and better over time and the way you get better is by experimenting w different styles, different genres, different ways of writing.

and the only way you can experiment and improve is through practise. in video games, especially rpgs (which are my favourite kind of video games), you struggle in the early game. youre at a low level, you dont have good equipment, you have a hard time moving to the next area. but the only way you progress is by grinding, gaining levels, and getting stronger. same w writing. if youre a level 1 writer, just starting out, no idea what to do, just experiment. fuck around a bit. write crackships, write rarepairs, write niche self-indulgent reader/character fics. at the end of the day, you should write for yourself. its good and cool if other people like your stuff and validate all your hard work, but at the end of the day, the one who should enjoy your writing the most is yourself.

you WILL mess up and you WILL struggle, but thats the only way you can improve. i struggle with pacing the most. still do. but others might have pacing down pat and struggle instead with word choice or pov or something else. cant figure out where you need to improve if you dont write, so just practise and worry about all the fine print later

⭐️- how do you get your inspiration? =

this is definitely not universal, but i just sit on my bed, close my eyes, and meditate. cycle through all my emotions and thoughts and filter them out. then i just toss everything out the damn window. like. id just meditate for a while, focus on breathing, on experiencing the present, picture a field and a tree and myself and breathe. thoughts fly by and i let them happen but dont focus on it.

meditating gives me some semblance of emotional control bc i normally have none, and it gives me kind of this space. this safe space that only exists for me and me alone. so i use that space to let the world drift away. just me and my thoughts and sometimes, those thoughts end up being good writing ideas. but i usually meditate for a set amount of time. like 15 minutes or 30 minutes so i dont write until i finish meditating.

then when i get out of my headspace, i open up my laptop and see what i remember. thinking too hard about something causes it to muddy up. same with art. in digital art, artists flip the canvas to refresh their eyes, see if there’s anything weird or wonky about the illustration that they normally dont see bc theyve gotten used to it. flipping the canvas is like giving our eyes a jumpstart and lets us see what we could do better. in traditional art, its turning the canvas this way and that or repositioning yourself. meditating is like that. a break. a cleanse. a kind of pause where you dont think about anything and just try to process what you already have. you relax and kind of let yourself float down a river of thoughts and sometimes, a fish would jump out of that river and youd go “hey, thats a good idea. i should try that” so when you get out of the river, youre refreshed and ready to go.

same principle with showers. more ideas come to you in the shower when you dont have anything to write with bc youre not thinking about it. youre not focusing on finding inspiration or motivation so ideas naturally flow through you. you know that feeling when you want to do x then someone comes along and says “hey you should do x” and suddenly all motivation to do x leaves? same w your brain. focus too much on “i should be writing” or “i want inspiration” and its never gonna come. just let things happen. at least, thats how i do it. some people might get inspiration by reading or watching tv. everyones different so if thats not what works out for you, dont feel pressured to try my method

💘- what’s your favorite AU? Least favorite? =

magic au. specifically fantasy au set in like a pre-modern era. shows like avatar where theres all this magic and fantastical beasts and so on and so forth. semi-modern like six of crows and nevernight are great too. i want that magic to be woven into people’s lives. harry potter is okay but there’s like this separation between magic and muggle. there’s this feeling of “magic” but like as a tool. like a spoon or a gun or a shovel. i want magic au’s that are INTEGRATED with the world its set in.

like in atla, earth kingdom people have trains they move with bending while fire nation people have machines powered by heat and steam. both correspond to their bending and makes sense for the world they live in. but if your plot is like harry potter and its less worldbuilding and more action, then there’s this book series called seasons rising (read it. so good) where there’s a bunch of spells but the spells have character. the people using the spells GIVE it character and it feels much more intimate. pokemon does the whole fantasy mixed w reality better. give two trainers the exact same pokemon and by the time that pokemon reaches lvl 50, its gonna have a different moveset, different fight style, etc bc it was shaped by the world and people around it. i like harry potter but tbh it could have been so much better

for the least favourite au, it’s A/B/O i dont like the whole “omegas are only good for breeding hurr durr” and “alphas are violent and aggressive and cant control themselves around omegas” thing and it squicks me out. major squick. i read the original harry potter squick (THAT one. yeah. you know the one) and i still hate a/b/o more. i get why people like it, and there are one or two fics set in a/b/o au that i enjoy reading, but as a whole, i severely dislike a/b/o fics.

the themes are squick, the character dynamics get so messed up, and shipping dynamics (bc a/b/o fics usually have shipping) just get so blown out of proportion. there are so many a/b/o fics that turn ooc or the character interpretations radically change or something else. no hate against a/b/o fans bc yall are amazing for writing/drawing yalls au. there are things that you can only do in this setting and exploring those things can be incredibly fun for people, but for me personally, its not an au i like to visit.

💻- three works of yours that are must reads =

i. dont know what fandom youre in anon or your genre preferences. so ill just rec you one fic for a different fandom each with kind of different genres. ts masterlist is on my side @hufflepuff-deceit and regular fanfic masterlist is on my writing blog @crownonymous

(BNHA) Viper. its my first serious attempt at fanfic in YEARS and its my baby. currently has 7 chapters, i havent updated it in a while bc im hyperfocused on ts rn, but i love it to bits. its just all of my fav bnha fics crammed into one fic. quirkless kind of villain izuku with stain as a mentor as they work together to bring light to the injustices of hero society and where bakugos bullying has visible and long-lasting repercussions? sign me the fuck up. you can read it on ao3 HERE bc its not on tumblr. kind of fast-paced, has a lot more action scenes than anything else ive written. heavy plot-wise but has a lot of humour and comedy to break things up

(Kimetsu no Yaiba) I Pray To God He Hears You. not related to my other kny fic oleander which is a multichap retelling au. iptghhy is a standalone one-shot and kind of a character study on one giyuu tomioka. i love him so much. giyuu is my baby and i adore him. so of course i wrote a sad fic focusing on him. well technically, the fic focuses on giyuu AND his relationships. SPOILERS for chapters 130 and 131 of the manga. focuses mostly on giyuu and sabito, but there’s a fair bit of giyuu and tanjiro and urokodaki. you can read it HERE bc this is also not on tumblr. also deals with heavy things but more emotion-wise since it doesnt have that much of a plot. loss. grief. moving on. survivors guilt. that kind of stuff. very sad. hurt but with comfort, especially at the end.

(Sanders Sides) Logan’s Birthday Fic: Logicality. just what the title says. i wrote 5 different fics and published them all on logans bday but the logicality one received the most feedback and honestly? the cutest of the bunch. its gonna be crossposted onto ao3 but for now, you can read it HERE on my ts sideblog. theres no plot since its literally just domestic and relationship fluff. and puns. patton is in the fic, theres gonna be puns. nothing but good things and warm feelings bc logan deserves it.

thank you so much for such interesting asks anon! i enjoyed answering these. have a lovely day!

#crowsas answers #kny #bnha #sanders sides

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formerlyrunephoenix6769 · 6 years

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I was asked and ask, and in my flu causing feverish state, I deleted it. So if you’re out there and recognize this question (and I’m paraphrasing) please reblog and @ me.

So If i remember, the question was along the lines of

“Why isnt there huge amounts of stuff, for shows like She -Ra and TDP, are they not as popular?”

Lets go for a ride...

I think the reason why we dont get the same amount of content generated for shows such as The Dragon Prince and She-ra, say in comparison to shows like RWBY.

And by content, I mean, theories, memes, art and in depth analysis, boils down to 3 things.

1) Time to Generate.

Both The Dragon Prince and She-Ra have only recently dropped their first season. Now both have their second season coming rather swiftly, esp in the case of The Dragon Prince. Season 2 is dropping tomorrow: Feb 15 2019 over on Netflix.

She-Ra’s is set to be released April 26th 2019, again on Netflix.

The Dragon Prince S1 was released on Sept 14th 2018, and She-Ra: Princesses of Power, Nov, 13th 2018.

In TDP case, that is a 5 month and 1 day turn around and SPOP, 5 months and 13 days turn around.

It is rather unheard of for an animation to have their Second season be ready in under 6 months. Usually it is anywhere from 10 months minimum to a year or in some cases, even longer.

I put this down to the success of the two series and how the audience received them, and Netflix wishing to capitalize on it, and the hype generated.

Lets just hope that the both properties dont feel rushed as a result.

So with such little time, and a very short hiatus in terms of tv shows, (which is when most of fandom generated content tends to be created), that gives very little time for their respective fandoms to leave their senses and devolve into some sort of animeesque Lord of the Flies in a matter of weeks, in a bid to cope.

(RWBY FNDM, I’m looking at you with your ‘Beehaw’s’ and YORSE, and ‘Scheehaw’s’. I still cant believe you made Arryn read that with her own eyes!!)

(You can tumblr search Yorse yourself, I aint making anyone look at that cursed image without their consent. You’ve been warned! ;p @hammertime-rwby i shake my head in your general direction... ;D )

Time to generate can also be reflected in how long a show has been on air, thereby garnering a wider and much larger fanbase with a broader set of creative skills, which in turn results in more fandom content generated, esp if there is the potential of shipping.

And bloody hell does SPOP have some crazy potential on the shipping front,

2) Time to Mature and Fandom Engagement.

As a show matures and the audience leans learn more about the characters and the world that they inhabit, the nature of fandom created content evolves. It also depends on the verve of the show itself.

The way in which a show is presented, the topics and themes they cover, the way the characters and the world are presented, can vicariously dictate how the fandom engages with the property, go forth and multiply.

For example:

Sherlock is very meme worthy and that tends to be reflected in the content that is generated by the Sherlockians.

RWBY has been out for 6 volumes and has a very dedicated and passionate FNDM, but it is also broad, large and incredibly diverse.

It is also rather vocal and has very strong differing opinions from one end of the spectrum to the other, which in turn creates YT reviews, reactions and rebuttals and heated retorts.

These polarising pov’s can then go on to permeate to other branches of social media, such as twitter, tumblr, discord etc etc

Same with fandom accepted headcanons and lore...

(I’m still on the fence about you Renora Rodeo Round up... You’re on thin ice! ;p )

But it has taken a number of years to cultivate.

Neither The Dragon Prince or She-Ra has had the time to do that, yet!

But I’m certain that will change in the coming future.

She-Ra has already generated quite the buzz on both the positive and negative sides, due to being based on a much loved, older, property, ‘She-Ra 1985′, but that is a mine field which I covered on my previous blog before some asshat decided to axe it.

Also, the themes that Netflix She-Ra seems to be covering, which helped generate a lot of the negative backlash towards the show, will most definitely continue to be polarizing... So I would keep an eye out if YT and people picking stuff apart is your jam.

On the other side, what SPOP seems to be trying to deliver will also generate lots of awesome content. Just look at how this took off,

“Hey Adora”

And this cinnamon roll’s preoccupation with ‘force captain orientation’,

The Dragon Prince strikes me as a show that would generate deep reflective analysis of world and characters as well as theories, much like its older cousin, Avatar Last Airbender, once there is more to comb over and speculate on.

These two shows are presented differently and they way they are tackling certain themes in their respective narratives are also vastly different, which could also have a lot to do with their respective target audience and intended demographic, so it stands to reason that the results of fandom generated content would be different.

3) Platform and Format.

This I believe is one of the most important aspects which ties the previous points above.

If a property is delivered week by week, such as RWBY, there is time, for the FNDM, after they make amazing screen shots and insta analysis and excited speculations, to go over it again and allow the episode to sink in.

(which both TDP and SPOP could do, as they have episodic episodes but that is an entirely different post)

There is time for the fans to go sit back and react to what they have seen, whether that is creating beautiful fan art, crafting in depth theories, character analysis, extrapolate potential world building.

A week by week delivery culminates in an emotional impact that is allowed to foster and grow, thereby gives space and time for the individual to go off and create content for their respective fandom.

Fanart takes time, fics take time.

The not knowing what could happen next opens up the avenues of thought out speculations.

Having a week to go over everything to that point and process new info. Being able to take your time to research and prep before you put it out there, results in good, in depth analysis and well crafted work.

Time gives breeding ground.

(Some wait years for lore.. Overwatch fandom, I dont know how we do it! But we all cant be Tracer!)

Because, we are so salivating at the the mouth for insta gratification and ‘binge’ culture has become so prevalent where media is concerned.

When a property is delivered all at once, it gives no breathing space for speculation and wild theories.

For a particular scene or interaction between characters to have an emotional impact and thereby create emotionally significant fan art, that is reblogged and shared in that moment, give it time to resonate with its respective fandoms.

And there for have time for other members of the fandom to be inspired to go off and create their own stuff in what ever medium is their forte.

Because we are on this fast paced ride, not only from the start of the chapter 1 to end of the first ‘book’, so to speak, but also the social media need to be the first to create the content for the fandom, the type of content generated, how and why, is hugely different and may not at first glance look like it is forth coming..

It just takes time to sink in.. To go back through and re-evaluate.

Being inspired by a particular interaction between two characters , or a certain facet of the world that an fan may have noticed and wishes to expand on, art wise, fic wish or theroise, loses its validity when you know that the next episode could answer your burning questions in less than 5 seconds.

And so you stave off for the dreaded nine episode when your eye balls are nearly gumming together and you know you have work in 4 hours but you need answers to the burning questions..

and so results.

This is not the content creators fault, in anyway. This is quite literally the way in which it is delivered.

Its is pretty much,

II) However, in Conclusion

The perceived lack of fandom interaction/generated content, in the social media platforms that a fan chooses to consume, or is available to them, does not mean that a show isn't popular.

The ties to previous projects, such as SPOP to She-Ra 1985 and The Dragon Prince to Avatar Last Airbender are vastly different.

Expectations are vastly different.

Fandom interaction and generation of fandom content, is not a measure made of how popular a show is.

Also, politely, remember the demographic of which these shows are aimed at.

Be respectful of the show creators, the property, the characters and the narrative that the show creators have painstakingly crafted and put out into the world.

The story that they want to tell.

Again,

a reminder,

Tomorrow, 15th Feb 2019 , Season 2 of The Dragon Prince.

(im gonna go back into my fluey coma now)

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 5 years

Text

2 big posts in one day? it’s more likely than you think!!!

Moze gameplay breakdown babey here we go

shit sorry i forgot my tl;dr the first time i posted this: the tablet is big important and might have eridian writing on it, it ties into the temple, the loot gun, the tablet in tannis’s infirmary on sanc-iii, and the planet holograms in Eleseer from TPS. also you get a special melee tool to break the purple crystals that i'm like 70% sure are Eridium and also, you’re never gonna believe this, but I talk about Atlas for a little bit because of it.

“lair of the harpy”

ah harpies. I’m shifting into Percy Jackson mode

just putting this out there

anyway as for what “Lair of the Harpy” means in bl3? Well we’ve seen in the We Are Mayhem trailer a bunch of flying Maliwan bots (i am assuming rn that those are Maliwan, anyway)

these green fucks

(u can tell that’s Jakobs Manor cause of the railing on the left) so i imagine that’s why it’s called the Lair of the Harpy. Could also be the lair of some evil woman character, idk lmao.

Far more interesting than the Harpy thing, to me anyway, is this:

i wonder if that’s gonna lead us to the psycho basement with tv heads being hanged where the Hammerlock siblings are standing in front of the fireplace

i wonder...

nah but for real. I would almost bet money that the Vault on Eden-6 is in that giant volcano/mountain area. It just feels right. we’ve seen it both dormant (the leaked footage) and active (the 3rd trailer) so I imagine opening the Vault would cause it to activate. Tho I’m still hoping onto the hope that it’s a moon pool. Just saying, Randy, if you’re reading this... just saying.

we also see this glowing sparkle icon again, which I think pretty much confirms from the We are Mayhem trailer that those will show us where the Moxxi crew quests are.

we see an enemy called “Shredder Fanatic”, personally I’m a fan of Splinter, but to each their own. Uhhh but for realsies they probably deal some blade damage or have a high RoF weapon.

a cool detail I noticed about the minimap is that elevated areas won’t get discovered until you reach that level. Thank god lol

part of this camp is made out of an old sailboat, which i think is pretty fuckin rad

makes me wonder if we’re ever going to see the areas of Pandora affected by the flash freeze again. How long do seasons last on Pandora again? I swear it was like 5 years or smth. oh well lol

i wanna know what this big thing is!! it looks cool. they mentioned that eden-6 was going to have a shitload of broken-down ships, so maybe this is related to it?

another look at what i'm assuming is Jakobs Manor. this is very hard because I keep getting distracted by the gameplay lol I’ve seen this video seven times! it shouldn’t be that enthralling!! and yet!

the combat music in this area is so fucking solid btw i am jamming the hell out

in awe at the size of this place. I’m digging the elevated hallway. i am very much getting a hogwarts vibe from here. the far right looks like an observatory, even.

“Big Donny’s Chop Shop - Open 7 Days” lmao

a gramophone and it looks like we can interact with it! i hope it plays classical music while we go on a murder spree

some sort of bridge? i assume that’s how you actually get up to Jakobs Manor. that may be why our quest is “go to Jakobs Manor”, we gotta fix the bridge before we can.

A Typhon journal!!!

No audio, though :(

From the radio: “catastrophe lead [???] to a lets play (flay?). Craving some meat in a bite sized package? then try festy flesh meats with a bandit on the go. hey, we know you want it, but do you have the time to hunt it down? ...”

-moxxi speaking about her crew challenge i can’t understand the radio here-

[different voice] “... for an exciting announcement from the CoV’s own ministers of murder: Pain and Terror! Those guys are cooking up one hell of a sh-” [player turns off radio] I gonna assume he was about to say “show” cause they’re a Penn and Teller reference. These are the guys from the arena with the giant skull thing, i think i have talked about them before?

Eden-6′s version of the shock cactus?

El Dragon Jr.

OwO are those the same purple rocks as Promethea?

They look like they are growing out of a stone tablet, i mean look at the green light. also they have that same star pattern inside them as Amara’s arms and Maya’s phaselock!!! Which makes me think it’s raw Eridium just... growing out of a stone tablet. which IS WILD!!!

AND WHAT IS MOZE HITTING IT WITH?!

FUCKING ENERGY BLADE

that is not her normal melee weapon, BY THE WAY

she normally uses her Stab! knife!!!

when u try to break the purple rocks on Promethea, iirc the player character can say something to the effect of “have to come back here later”, so it’s possible later in the story we get something (the glowing red/orange/yellow) energy sword to break the purple rocks (eridium???). and yes you KNOW i pointed out the colors because Atlas.

After meleeing it, Moze says “let’s open you up” so im wondering if maybe those stone tablets come into play later? the (eridium?) crystals explode into sparkly purple powder

glowing green!!!! It’s weird, I feel like these are eridian ruins/tablets growing eridium or some shit. we’ve seen the ruins have lines of color across them before, but never strictly on one side. and also never saw them grow eridium. i wonder if that is a reaction to us opening the second vault on pandora? eridium grew on pandora from the 1st one, now it’s spreading because of the second? I deffo think Eridium is from the second dimension (it started growing on pandora after the opening of the Vault) and it’s our key to getting there.

OwO

hey doesn’t that look familiar? I’ll give u like

10 seconds

...

yeah it’s the symbol from the gun

YEAH BABEY

AND GUESS WHAT

YOU KNOW HOW THE GUN WAS TIED TO THE TEMPLE

YOU KNOW HOW I WAS TALKING ABOUT TANNIS’S FLOOR TILE IN HER INFIRMARY ALSO BEING TIED TO THE TEMPLE AREA???

LET ME GO GRAB IT

THE TEMPLE

AND YOU KNOW I WAS REPLAYING TPS THE OTHER DAY FOR MY ANGEL ANALYSIS AND

FUCKING

ASGHDJUYKFDJTYHSRTAGR

THAT’S LABELING A PLANET IN THE HOLOGRAM

AAAAAAAAAAAAA THE ERIDIANS GAVE US A LOOT SPEWING GUN BUT THE GUN MAKES SENSE BECAUSE VAULTS VOMIT UP LOOT ALL THE TIME BUT IT’S NOT LIKE THE LOOT WE GOT WAS AROUND WHEN THE ERIDIANS CREATED THE VAULTS

ALSO I AM VERY CONCERNED THAT CORPSE IN THE TEMPLE IS TYPHON NOW AND THE BOOK IS HIS JOURNAL. WHY WOULD MAYA BE GIVING THE JOURNAL TO THE LITTLE GIRL? IS SHE ALSO RELATED TO TYPHON?

OKAY SORRY I GOT EXCITED but uh yeah idk if that writing/those symbols being the same was intentional or not but it exists and i'm losing my mind over it

i also just wanna know why the rocks are growing eridium and glowing green like what the fuck are your SECRETS

Aurelia shows up as you cross the checkpoint at the bridge, so it’s pretty much 100% confirmed the Hammerlocks are helping us with the jakobs thing. considering Aurelia is contacting us and not Alistar, im REALLY worried about the shot in the We Are Mayhem trailer where he has red eyes. please don’t hurt him. also i love how Aurelia calls herself a rich bitch. she makes that shit rhyme lol

another look at that big tower thing. May be a different one, actually. idk!

round the corner and see a little camp on the left. through that tunnel up ahead leads us here

we head to the right and Zer0 ECHOs us, asking us to kill someone to complete a crew challenge

The target’s name is Heckle (and his rage name is Hyde)

Interestingly he has a megaphone strapped to his mouth

wild.

Lots of stuff! Zer0 sends you mail for killing the target and you are informed that the Crew Challenge is completed. You also get a challenge completed for doing it. You ever notice the actual gameplay of borderlands is very tied to yellow and blue? the color of the title is yellow and the vault symbol for it is red (except for TPS). just odd to me idk

looks like a little envelope icon appears under your minimap when you have mail in your inbox!

we can see some cryo freezing the swamp water here! that’s my favorite thing. the electricity is cool, but ice is cooler.

i love the way this dude runs. also we now know that his pickaxe is to burrow his way into the ground

looks like it will create a huge pink cloud so you know when its about to happen, giving you time to stop it. nice.

getting closer. guess that wasn’t an observatory after all. Awww mannn

lootsplosion from the loot tink

bigger lootsplosion from his bag

i believe this is our first look at an ‘artifact’ which are replacing relics from bl2 and oz kits from tps. and like the interviews said, they’ll be effecting movement! this one turns your slide damage into cryo damage, lets you deal more radiation damage overall, and allows you to slide faster and further. i wonder how broken this can get on a downwards slope with a super high level slide relic. let’s break the sound barrier!

anyway, that’s all i saw that caught my eye. I still haven’t completed my Mask of Mayhem analysis, I was kinda hoping something during E3 would help me figure out who those mystery robed maliwan guys are on it, but alas we got nothing of real substance. oh, i also gotta finish that mural piece... aw fuck

#borderlands #bl3 #borderlands 3 #moze #moze gameplay breakdown

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just-a-dumb-gay · 6 years

Text

So how this would all probably go is gonna probably sound a little...boring? Idk. If it were to happen it'll probably be alot more dramatic and cute in the show than just typing it out. And this is realistic, if it did happen it could (and probably would, typical TV cliche things and all that) go exactly like this.

So what would probably happen is we don't see Peez get hurt, just maybe a few things blow up (perhaps caused either by Hope's messed up magic or some weird af monster) or just something happens wrecking the place and hurting quite a few people.

Everyone ducks and hides to try and avoid getting hurt. Then when it's over everyone starts coming out from their hiding spots and everything. (Just pretty much the usual in these situations.)

We then see Josie come out from hiding looking around and then she spots Penelope lying on the floor, we can't tell if she's alive cos she's on her side and has her back to the camera.

Josie runs over to Peez and rolls her onto her back then starts checking for a pulse or to see if she's breathing.

When she can't find anything she starts crying, so when Josie starts getting upset Lizzie comes over. She tries to hug Josie but Josie just pushes Lizzie away.

Josie starts looking around trying to think of anything that could help while Lizzie just watches unable to think of anything she can do to help.

Then Josie has an idea, she doesn't say anything but it's clear by the look on her face.

So she puts her hand on the floor and starts siphoning magic from the school, after a few seconds she then puts her other hand on Penelopes chest and starts whispering some spell we've never heard before.

The lights would probably start flickering and everything to make it seem alot more dramatic. Although actually that would probably be realistic, siphoning from the school would mess with the electrics an all that if theres alot of it in there.

1 of 2 things could happen and it doesn't really matter which, both could be good:-

1 - Josie stops the spell because it doesn't appear to be working and just as she gives up Peez comes back to life.

2 - Josie is in the middle of the spell and Lizzie looks like she's about to step in and stop it because Josie's nose is beginning to bleed (like with Bonnie when she tried to much magic) but then Peez comes to life.

Penelope sits up and looks around trying to comprehend what just happened, and by this point Josie is crying alot. Just now with happiness.

Before Peez can say anything Josie hugs her and nearly knocks her back down. So she keeps one hand on the floor to keep her balance and uses the other to hug Josie.

Peez notices Lizzie watching looking beyond shocked and mouths "What happened?". Lizzie, still stunned answers with, "You died..."

Just after Lizzie finishes saying that Josie backs away a little but rests her forehead against Penelope's and says something like "I thought I lost you."

Peez rests her hand against Josie's cheek and wipes away a few of her tears while trying to lighten the mood a little by saying "You really think I'd let death get the better of me?" in typical Penelope Park confidence.

Josie just smiles a little not really knowing what to say, she's just glad Peez is okay.

(And now we get into the still highly possible if this did happen, but a little less likely and more just what I'd want to see)

Peez doesn't say anything else, just gently kisses Josie's nose then changes position slightly so she can hug Josie properly.

Then it'll probably change to someone else. Maybe we'll still see Posie in the background depending on who it changes to.

Later we see Josie in Ric's office getting yelled at while Penelope stands back and is leaning against the door or something (probably still looking damn good despite just being brought back from the dead). Or possibly being checked over by Emma for anything dodgey.

Turns out Josie used some kind of dark magic she read about (that way this also gives us an point for us to start seeing some dark Josie) in books Ric had hidden away, but she got curious so found them and looked through them. That whole scene probably wont be anything much, just Josie getting yelled. And they don't find anything obviously wrong with Penelope, but most major spells have some sort of consequence.

After that (like last scene of the episode where we see these 3) Posie are asleep in Josie's bed. Or at least Josie is asleep, she's got her on Penelope's chest and Peez has both arms wrapped tightly round Josie.

Lizzie then comes in and pauses when she sees the 2 of them. Penelope opens her eyes and when she sees Lizzie standing there she carefully sits up but keeps her arms wrapped around Josie.

Lizzie - *kinda mean* (she obviously still wont like Peez much) "You know she was terrified she'd lost you earlier, I don't think I've ever seen her more scared."

Penelope - *stays quiet, expecting some sarcastic comment*

Lizzie - "I don't like you, but it's clear Josie still does. But I swear if you hurt her again, you will regret it."

Penelope - "I have no intention of hurting her, I never have..."

Lizzie - "Why do I feel like there's more to add to that sentence?"

Penelope - "She told me you read the note. Why?"

Lizzie - *trying to play innocent but major sarcasm* "I didn't know what it was when I picked it up, oops."

Penelope - *brushing hair out of Josie's face* "Well if you read the note then I'm sure you know what else I wanted to add to that sentence."

Then we get a shot of Lizzie looking shocked and Peez with a small smile on her face and boom scene ends.

Then in another episode we find out there was a part of the spell Josie didn't know. The part that mentions whoever is brought back to life will have their life linked to the person that brought them back. What physical pain one feels, the other feels. If one dies so does the other. And we dont find that out from Ric looking through the books, im thinking more along the lines of Josie gets a paper cut while her and Peez are studying together and Penelope feels it too. Like the thing between Katherine and Elena when Katherine wanted the moon stone. (I am getting that correct right? Honestly after 8 seasons of TVD everythings kinda blended and I don't remember what was when, I just remember bits and pieces.)

#legacies #posie #penelope park #josie saltzman #lizzie saltzman #lulu antariksa #kaylee bryant

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canadiankazz · 6 years

Text

The Fifth Time - An L.A. by Night Fanfic

Things have been going very well for a while between Annabelle and Jasper, but it only takes one phone call to throw a wrench into everything.

L.A. By Night Alternative Universe where Jasper has been feeding from Annabelle for several weeks and they have developed a Blood Bond. SPOILERS for the end of Campaign 1 including the one-shots. This was written before Season 2, Episode 3.

It’s worth reading the rest of the series before this part.

The Entire ‘Feeds From’ Master List Can be Found Here

I lay no claim to owning any of the characters involved. Warnings for some mild BDSM in this part.

As always, special thanks to @cravatfiend for the support, feedback and encouragement during the writing of the drafts. Special love to @gokaiyellow for their additional input and for being as patient as they can. Thank you to everyone else who has enjoyed this series so far. When I first wrote this, I thought this part might be the end. It isn’t. I’m currently finishing parts 9, 10 and 11 with ideas for more.

Also posted to the author’s Ao3.

First published Feb. 7, 2019.

The Fifth Time Jasper Fed From Annabelle

“I have an idea I want to float past you,” Annabelle said.

Jasper glanced up at her. Her eyes were almost sparkling with mischief. He quirked his eyebrows at her. “Go on, then. I'm listening.” He was, but his main attention went back to the Jenga tower between them. His hands were very careful and dexterous, but even those most skilled at fine manipulation will find it difficult when a Jenga game goes on for too long and the tower starts to get wobbly.

“I'd like to, um... do something similar to what we did last time...”

Jasper could hear the blush in Annabelle's voice even though it couldn't be seen in her cheeks. He smirked to himself and he gently wriggled a block free. Who would have thought any Nosferatu could make someone blush? Take that, Toreadors.

“And which last time was that?” Jasper teased as he placed the block on top of the tower.

“You know... on the bed... with the neck biting...” Annabelle said, flustered.

“Ah, yes,” he smiled, showing his fangs. “You really enjoyed that one.”

Annabelle made an annoyed, scrunched up face at him. She knew he was teasing her. “Yes. That one. I'd like to do something similar again, but... “

He waited for her to pull out a Jenga block. It was stuck, but she managed it.

“But...?” he prompted.

She put the block on top of the tower. It wobbled, but stayed up. “But I thought you'd maybe like to... um... chase me?”

Jasper looked puzzled, not sure he had heard her correctly. “Excuse me?”

“You could chase me...” she shrugged, embarrassed. “Never mind, it's a stupid idea.”

“No, hold on.” He put a finger up. He didn't like her thinking she was stupid. “So... you'd like me to chase you, and pin you down when I catch you?”

Annabelle's jaw was tight and she found she couldn’t look at him. It sounded so cringy when said out loud. “Yeah...”

“Like, in the street?”

“No, around in here.” She gestured a little to the sanctum around them. They were currently in Jasper's lounge. The Jenga tower was set up on a little table between them.

“You do know that I know these tunnels better than you,” he reminded her.

Annabelle was very aware. She shrugged. “It was just a thought I had. Never mind-”

“No, I want to do it.”

Annabelle looked up at him. “Yeah?”

“I mean... with the safe word and all, but... yeah. It could be fun.” He was grinning again. Annabelle's stomach did a little flip whenever he grinned like that at her.

She swallowed. “I will fight back though, this time. You'll really have to hold me.”

Jasper tilted his head down a little so that his stare and grin took on a Kubrick style. “Sounds good,” he growled.

Annabelle bit her lip. “Okay.”

“And when would you like to... begin this chase?”

“Um...” Annabelle glanced at the Jenga tower. Jasper got the impression she was going to do something a second before she did it. She deliberately pushed the tower over in Jasper's direction and shouted “Now!” She sprang up and bolted out of the room.

Jasper's laugh had a snarl in it. She was adorable. He brushed the Jenga blocks off his lap, in no hurry to begin. This was his home, after all, and he knew there were only so many places she could go. The fun would be over much too quickly if he just sprang up and caught her in the first minute. He stood up, cracked his neck back and forth, then activated Obfuscate and disappeared. His Beast stirred, interested in the proceedings. It had been a long time since there had been a hunt.

Annabelle darted through Jasper's workshop and turned down a passage. She looked behind her, but couldn’t see or hear anything. She tried a door and found it to be locked. Another door opened and she found herself in a library. She paused and looked around. She was so tempted to stop and look through Jasper's books, but she couldn't linger. She thought she heard something behind her and wriggled in behind a shelf. She stayed as still and as quiet as she could. Annabelle realised too late that she hadn't closed the library door and cursed herself. She held her breath for a moment before she remembered she didn't have to breathe. She caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Did a book shift?

“Better keep running,” came Jasper's sudden hiss in her ear.

Annabelle just about leapt out of her skin. She yelped and sprang up. He was nowhere to be seen. She scurried out of the library, seriously spooked. She thought she could hear him snicker behind her.

Annabelle sprinted down another passage and made several turns. She somehow found herself back in his workshop. She paused for a second and took off her jacket. She flung it towards Jasper's lounge, hoping it might be some kind if distraction, and moved in the opposite direction. This, at least, she knew fairly well by now. This was the direction of the bedroom.

The bedroom, of course, was a dead end. She knew that. He knew that. But she also knew that they were probably going to end up there eventually.

She thought she could hear movement behind her again as she scampered into the bedroom. She got as far away from the door as possible, with the bed between her and it and turned to face her stalker. She couldn’t see him, but she knew he was there. She bared her fangs and hissed in challenge, like she had seen other Kindred do, calling on some ancient Brujah memory in her blood. She heard an answering snarl come out of thin air and her opponent became visible. He was in the room, just in front of the door. Jasper kicked it shut behind him without looking back at it. The door slammed solidly home with a loud bang!

Brujah and Nosferatu stared each other down in the little bedroom, both daring the other one to make a move. Annabelle smirked, betraying the game, and tried to fake Jasper out. She ducked left, then right. Jasper cut the knot and simply jumped over the bed to get to her. He cleared it easily and slammed into her, shoving her against the wall. She landed hard, wrestling with him as he tried to pin her arms down. She used her strength against him and tried to wriggle free. Annabelle aimed a knee at Jasper and it connected. She broke free and made for the door, but he was right on her. Before she could turn the knob, he pinned her to the door and grabbed her wrists. Annabelle twisted and fought, but Jasper held her fast against the solid door. He leaned in and she could feel his mouth on the back of her neck and shoulder. “Keep... still...” he snarled quietly. Gently, without breaking the skin, he scraped his fangs against her neck. It was a warning and a promise.

Annabelle froze. She shivered at the sensation. Slowly, she tested her wrists again, but he was holding them fast. His whole body was pressing her against the closed door, with her facing the wood. She could push him off and away, but not without using some vampiric power.

“Blush for me,” Jasper rasped in her ear. Something familiar in her belly coiled like a spring in anticipation. She did as he asked. Instantly, she began to breathe hard. Her pulse raced. Her skin and blood warmed. She heard a pleased growl rumble fourth from directly behind her. The sound of it made her insides turn to jelly.

Jasper took two steps back away from the door, taking Annabelle with him. He had her arms restrained, crossed over themselves and her chest like a straight jacket, with his cold hands holding tightly to her wrists. She made another effort to struggle free, but he moved with her, countering her twisting motion. He steered her to another wall and pinned her there, away from the door. He leaned in very close and whispered “So far, so good... what colour is the stoplight?”

“Green,” Annabelle grunted as she continued to struggle against him. He was using the wall to help pin her arms, giving him a free hand to help brace himself properly.

“Good.” He used his teeth to move her tank top strap aside and down her arm. She was wearing a thin strap top this night. His Beast was getting very excited, but he was deliberately taking his time. “I thought I told you to keep still.” He nipped her exposed neck and drew a tiny scrape of blood. Annabelle hissed in pain. Jasper growled deep in his throat as the scent and sight of Vitae hit his senses. Annabelle could feel the vibration of it, but said nothing to stop him. She did stop struggling though.

Jasper licked the little wound closed and sniffed his way down her neck. It was then that Annabelle realised that he was teasing himself as much as her. She grinned despite herself.

“Would you like me to bite you?” he asked in a hushed tone.

Annabelle's voice shook a little when she answered. Her body had a vivid memory of the pleasure, the ecstasy that followed the brief pain from his bite, and it was craving it. “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Please?”

She could hear him snarl in amusement. “Well, that's a first.”

Annabelle blinked. “What?”

“Someone saying please.”

She felt his muscles tense for a moment, then he suddenly spun her around to face him with her back pressing against the wall. Before she could react, he plunged his fangs into her neck with a hungry snarl. She gasped. He was biting hard, very hard, and the pain was intense.

“Yell..mmm...nnn....” she mumbled, losing her words as the bliss followed and began to roll over her brain and though her body.

To her mild surprise, Jasper pulled back. He had blood on his teeth. He was still holding her against the wall, but his grip relaxed noticeably. His bite mark on her skin oozed Vitae, thick and red, in a line down towards her cleavage. She too was hit by the scent of it now, and it was a powerful scent indeed. Her Vitae was warm with her Blush of Life. Her Beast growled and twitched in her chest, as if confused.

“Mmm?” Annabelle frowned at him. The pleasure was fading. Why had he stopped?

Slowly, deliberately, carefully, Jasper dipped his head to lick at that escaping blood drop before it disappeared into her shirt and bra. “You said 'yellow,'” he murmured. Despite his gentleness, Annabelle could feel that his whole body was under extreme tension, holding back his Beast with both hands on the metaphorical leash.

Annabelle shivered and whimpered at his lick. His tongue was oddly cold against her warmed skin. Her chest heaved up and down as her body reacted to the stimulus. “...'M okay...” she mumbled. “Was just... sharp.”

Jasper chuckled. “Sorry. Got a little... carried away.”

“Mmm… It’s okay.” Annabelle took a deep breath and braced herself. She knew that she could back out now, and Jasper would let her. She didn’t want to back down though. Her body was craving release as much as his was craving her blood. “Green.”

Jasper's mouth went back to the bloody wound and he started to suck her Vitae out of it. This time, there was no pain. That part was over. Now, there was just the pleasure.

And oh, what pleasure it was. Jasper was going slow and tender again, but was gradually speeding up and increasing the pressure on her while he did so. Annabelle was soon moaning. Her knees felt weak and she struggled to support herself. Jasper put an arm around her to keep her upright and against the wall. She clung to him. Her previous struggles to escape turned into her pressing, grinding herself against him, wanting ever more stimulus. She could feel herself building up again deep inside to a climax, and the small cognisant part of her brain, the part responsible for this kind of base desire, prayed she would get there before he pulled away.

She did. Her moans got louder and she shuddered in release. She could hear and feel Jasper growling in response. A few seconds later, she was dimly aware of him pulling back and licking her wound closed. She slumped against the wall and against him, her legs shaking. Little aftershocks rippled through her.

Jasper smiled to himself, very pleased. Once again, he could feel her pleasure, taste it in her blood. This was something he could definitely get used to. His Beast lurked below the surface of his mind, reminding him that it would be so easy for him to continue until he had taken her last drop, but he was very firmly in control of himself and knew he would do no such thing. Jasper scooped Annabelle up into his arms and carried her the short distance to the bed, where he lay her down. She sighed, still getting her breath back. Annabelle's Beast writhed, as always unhappy with the situation, but she was getting good at ignoring it and letting its complaints be drowned in her sea of endorphins and after glow.

When she opened her eyes again a short while later, Jasper was sitting on the bed by her feet, watching her in the dim light of the room. He smiled at her without showing his fangs. He didn't feel the need to ask her if she was good. He already knew the answer to that.

“I like watching you... after. You always look like you've had the best time of your whole life.” He frowned, then corrected himself. “Un-life?”

She chuckled. “Well... you're pretty good.”

“Thank you.” He bowed his head a little. “Who says Nosferatu don't know how to show someone a good time, huh?”

“I've never said that!” Annabelle grinned.

This time, Jasper's smile was toothy.

Annabelle stretched and tried to adjust her top and bra back in place, only to find the strap of her tank top, which Jasper had previously moved with his fangs, snap in two in her hands. They both snickered.

“Oh, no!” Annabelle was partly dismayed and mostly amused.

“Oops... I must have bit it too hard, sorry,” Jasper said, though he didn't sound very apologetic.

Annabelle was trying to examine her bra strap, which still seemed to be okay. The structural integrity of the tank top was ruined though. The right front and back of it hung down without the support of the strap, exposing her bra to Jasper for the first time. It was black lace. Very sensual. Definitely date night.

“It's okay,” Annabelle sighed. “Going to have to get rid of it now though.”

She had meant later, after she got home, but Jasper shrugged. “Take it off. I'll be right back.” He slipped off the bed and headed for the door.

“What?” Annabelle blinked at him, surprised.

He paused at the door. “Take your top off. I'll give you something else.”

She smirked at him. She suspected that now was his time to blush pink if he could.

Jasper disappeared into the passageway and Annabelle did as he asked her. She wriggled out of the ruined top and dropped it to the floor. Part of her was glad she didn't have to get up. She wasn't sure her legs would allow her to walk yet, after that. She lay on the bed in her nice bra and jeans and wondered if she should cover up a little more, but Jasper returned before she had a chance to. He had a black, fuzzy bundle in his arms and tossed it gently to her. He seemed to be deliberately trying to not notice that she was under-dressed.

“Here,” Jasper said.

Annabelle examined the article of clothing she had been given and gave a little squeal. “It's the labradoodle hoodie!”

“I recall you liking it.”

“I recall thinking you looked adorable in it!” Annabelle countered.

“Well... you can keep it,” Jasper said.

She was already slipping it on. The sleeves were way too long and the hood was way too big. She felt like she was swimming in fuzzy black wool. “I can? Really?”

“Sure,” he shrugged. He had a closet full, and didn't need that one any more.

“Thank you,” Annabelle beamed at him. She reached for him, her hands seeming almost small in the long sleeves. “Come here.”

Jasper crawled onto the bed with her and they settled in each other's arms. She rested her head against his lean chest. She still had Blush of Life on, and he could feel her warmth and breathing. It kind of made him wish, for just a moment, that he had learned it too. It's funny, the little things you forget about being alive.

Later on next night, Jasper and Annabelle sat on Jasper's bed together binge watching a vampire Anime on her laptop. The main character was a more eldritch abomination take on Dracula and was fighting a horde of vampire Nazis who had invaded London. They were on episode nine of ten and things were reaching a climatic, bloody end.

They were interrupted by Jasper's phone going off. He checked the number. It was the Baron of Hollywood. “Sorry, I have to take this,” Jasper told Annabelle. He extracted himself from her and the bed and took a few steps away to answer the call. Annabelle paused the video and watched him. She saw that his phone still had a scrape on its case from when he had been run over by a truck the month previous.

“Good evening, Baron,” Jasper said smoothly into the phone. Annabelle's eyes widened a little and and swallowed.

“Is it Victor?” she mouthed silently to him. Jasper shook his head at her. She couldn’t hear the other half on the conversation, only what Jasper was saying.

“I am very well, thank you.” Jasper gave Annabelle a tiny smile. She smiled back, relaxing somewhat. Jasper was on good terms with Baron Abrams. Annabelle fidgeted with a loose thread on the sleeve of Jasper's black labradoodle hoodie that he had given her. She was still wearing it and had slept in it the day before. It was very cosy. She wanted to sleep in it forever, or until the fabric fell apart, at least.

“And yourself?” Jasper continued into the phone. “...Yes... Yes, it is... I can, but I think that the Baron of the Valley may need to be reminded by someone that although I am in his coterie, I am not always in his barony, and he does not always listen to me. …Yes, sir, I do.”

Annabelle put a hand over her mouth to suppress a giggle.

Isaac Abrams was telling Jasper something very interesting. Whatever it was, it was making Jasper grin a lot. He glanced at Annabelle again and she could see a moment of doubt and conflict in his eyes. He seemed to come to a decision.

“Yes,” he told the Baron. “Yes. I can. ...Yes, sir. I'll see you soon.” He hung up.

“What was that about?” Annabelle asked.

“I have... good news and bad news.” Jasper came back over to her. “Isaac Abrams is giving me another opportunity to... look after another political prisoner of his from the Ivory Tower.”

“Oh.” Annabelle strongly disapproved. To her, this didn't seem like good news and bad news at all. It only seemed like bad news. Jasper could see it all over her face and feel it in her blood. “Do you have to?” she asked him.

Jasper shrugged. “No, but... I'd like to.”

Annabelle frowned deeply. She was disappointed in him. “Jasper...”

“Annabelle. This is what I do. This is my job,” his tone was gentle. He wasn't going to let her talk him out of this. He had been conflicted for a few moments, but his mind was made up now, and he was unlikely to want to change it. “Yes, I could tell Abrams 'no'. Hell, you could order me to tell him 'no,' and I might have to comply with that, but that may damage my reputation with him, and staying on the Baron's good side is better than not.”

“Are you going to feed from this new person?”

He had already thought about that too. “Yes.”

Annabelle's level of upset went up a notch. “But you don't have to... I accept that you're being given a job. You're a prison guard, fine. But you don't have to...”

“I might need to, at least a little bit, to keep them weak, to help make sure they won't break out,” Jasper explained softly.

That did make a degree of sense, but Annabelle still didn't like it. She was quiet for a long moment. Jasper habitually ran his tongue over his fangs before speaking again.

“I'll understand if... you don't want us to have another feeding date again,” Jasper said very quietly. He cursed himself. Now she had him thinking of them as 'dates' too. He was also mentally preparing himself. He was going to miss it, miss her, if she told him 'no more.' He couldn’t lie to himself about that.

“I don't know, Jasper,” she sighed sadly.

“We don't have to stop though,” he continued. “I unfortunately can't allow you to come back here while there's someone in that cage, but... we could go somewhere else, if you still want to.”

Annabelle had been looking down at her hands, but looked back up at him again. “I can't come here again?”

He shook his head. “No. No one will. I have to keep this new prisoner a secret. I shouldn’t even tell you that I am getting a new person. I only am because... you've spent so much time here, lately.”

Annabelle bit her lip. She looked like she wanted to cry.

“I'm sorry,” Jasper told her. He was genuine.

“It's okay,” Annabelle sighed. Deep down, she knew that they couldn’t keep up what she and Jasper had been doing forever, but at the same time, she was also going to miss coming down to his sanctum. “You're right... we don't have to stop. I'm going to miss this place though.” She sighed again. “Do we have time to finish the series?”

“No, not right now. I have to go see Abrams. Sorry... again.”

Annabelle pouted and packed away her laptop. She bent and scooped her ruined tank top off the floor where she had left it and stuffed that in her bag too. Jasper watched her carefully and noticed that she was trying very hard not to cry. She had a hard lump in her throat. He swallowed.

“Hey... come here,” he said. He opened his arms and drew her into a hug. She clung to him, sniffling. Jasper was head and shoulders taller than her and easily rested his chin on the crown of her head. “Shh... it's okay, Annabelle,” he said softly. “All that's changing is that you won't be able to come down here any more, and why would anyone want to? It's literally a hole in the ground.” He heard her snicker a little, though it was muffled. “And anyways... now you can travel and not worry about when and where... and who... I'm going to eat. You can do your own thing and I'll do mine and sometimes, if you'd like, we can still meet up for... dates. It's not the end of the world, and it's not the end of... this thing we have. It's just changing.”

He could feel Annabelle nod. He smoothed her hair with his hand and she let go of him and stepped back. She still looked a little sad, but she knew Jasper was right.

Annabelle pressed something round and plastic into Jasper's hand. It was one of her little fake tea light candles. He stared at it and smiled slowly.

“Keep one here and think of me, yeah?” Annabelle requested.

“Sure,” he promised her. “Always.” He couldn’t not think of her lately, but having this little reminder might be nice.

Jasper knew that Annabelle would be okay. This was a blow to their relationship, but he did not want to miss this opportunity from Abrams. Annabelle was free to come and go from the city, and indeed had been thinking about leaving L.A. for long stretches of time. Jasper did not want to lock her up, but he did need a reliable feeding source if he was going to keep existing. It would mean going back to his violent, non-consenting feeding habits, but he was okay with that. His Beast certainly didn't care if his victim said 'yes' or not. Annabelle giving him permission all these previous times had been the delightful exception to the rule. If she did wish to eventually continue their dates, he didn't have to give up on non-consensual feeding all together. He had a feeling that she would eventually give in and would want to see him again, to feel his fangs in her skin again, but that it would take her a while. That was okay. He could wait.

The following evening, there was a new prisoner in Jasper's cage, and Jasper was extremely excited. He didn't know how Baron Abrams had obtained this rival from the Ivory Tower in the first place, and at the moment, Jasper didn't care. The Baron didn't always answer his questions, and he didn't want to push his luck.

As delighted as Jasper was by this change in his fortune and being given a second chance by the Baron of Hollywood, there were still a few downsides to this. Namely, he was going to miss Annabelle coming here and spending the occasional days and nights with him in his sanctum. He also was going to have to go hunting on the regular for food for his victim, but that was okay. He was very good at hunting, even if he didn't eat the humans himself. Additionally, he kind of wished he could tell Nelli about this, if nothing else just to see her face. He was going to enjoy quietly, privately, lording this over her. Otherwise, so far as Jasper was concerned, this was excellent.

The vampire in the cage was a male Kindred still in Torpor, enforced by a wooden stake through his chest. The Torpor would end when Jasper pulled the stake out. Jasper knew that his victim would be starving as his Beast reacted to coming back to life, as it were, so he had a woman- beating drug dealer with a concussion all ready to go. The other vampire was wearing a black silk shirt, now ruined, of course, by the stake. Jasper smirked to himself. He had no intentions of getting this guy a new shirt.

Jasper carefully placed the meal, who was bleeding lightly from a head wound, into the cage next to the vampire. Then, in one firm, swift action, he yanked out the stake, stepped back and slammed the jail door shut. The vampire's eyes snapped open and he hissed in pain, rage and hunger. The Beast commanded him to pounce on the nearest source of blood and he did, very quickly ending the man's life. Jasper locked the door during this distraction and took a few more steps back to watch.

The caged Kindred finished feeding and got his wits back. He looked around in anger and bewilderment. “What the...?! Where the hell am I?!” he demanded. Then his eyes fell on Jasper and he recognised him. His eyes filled with more rage, and just a hint of horror. “You...!”

The last time he had seen this Kindred, Jasper had been about to hunger Frenzy at the Highland in Hollywood. Jasper had briefly entertained the notion back then of leaping over the table and ripping into this insufferable Toreador's throat. My, how the tables had turned.

Jasper grinned at his newest captive. This was going to be fun. “Hi, Chaz.”

#la by night #l.a. by night #vampire the masquerade #fanfic #fanfiction #jasper #annabelle #jaspabelle #kinky shit #yes the jenga tower is in reference to another geek and sundry show :3 #and the blush for me line is taken from another vampire rpg fic but i hope i am forgiven for that #jasper/annabelle #times jasper fed from annabelle

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missjackil · 6 years

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SPN Did Something Pretty Amazing

One thing I have always liked about Supenatural, is that theyre willing to try things no other shows have done. Most of the time it works, sometimes it doesnt, but theyre not affraid to think outside the box. Things like having a cross-over with Scooby Doo, or episodes like The French Mistake, or Fan Fiction, are great, though theyre doable only because of the premise of the show. In the supernatural world, nothing is impossible. The heros die and come back a lot, old characters come back in various ways, in dreams, time travel, or even as the same character, and this is ok because again, in the supernatural world nothing is impossible. However, this newest amazing thing, at its core, didnt come to pass because of supenatural influence, but because of human actions, and viewer acceptance. Two brothers and their Angel buddy, adopt an adult orphan son. Think about that. What show has ever done such a thing? None. In similar cases, like 3 Men and a Baby, Full House, Two and a half Men, there is one defined Father, and then the other men are uncles or support for the one father. But not on SPN, all 3 have been defined as this kid’s father, even though none of them are biologically his father. Even before Luficer died, we saw this beginning. And even stranger still, there were always strong efforts to keep Jack away from his biological father, which is also not a common practice. When dealing with an older child, theres always a “let them chose” clause. But thats never really been the case on SPN, it was always “Keep Lucifer away from this kid” and justifiably so, I might add, but its still strange for TV isnt it? Yet, somehow this all worked. Now, this isnt a debate on who deserves to be Jacks main father, which would obviously be Sam but to just talk about how the show managed to make this happen and be completely accepted by the viewers.

I work with several SPN fans, though Im the only one who wouldnt really be considered a casual viewer, meaning Im the only obssessed one LOL but the others arent involved in SPN SM on tumblr or twitter, they dont go to conventions and none of them are into shipping. (thats right, it seems most casual viewers dont ship the characters) yet all of them think its cool that Sam, Dean and Cas are Jack’s fathers, none of them think its creepy, incestuous, or gay. One did joke that it sounded like the synopsis of a very bad porno, (2 brothers, and their buddy take in a young adult orphan as their own) but then said that its a very cool concept. What I think made it work, is everything thats gone down in the last 13 years. I dont care if youre a wincest shipper or not, but theres no closer relationship on the show than Sam and Dean. We know now they are “stuck” with each other, they wont be finding a significant other and building their own family, and even in the end, they’ll be together. Be it on Earth, in Heaven, Hell or the Empty. Also, they have no closer companion than Cas. Whether or not you like the character, canonically, Cas is their best friend that they love as a brother. Since the show revolves around family dynamics, good ones and bad ones, we’ve seen Sam and Dean in every position. As brothers, sons, cousins, friends, and even as husbands breifly to Lisa and Amelia. we never really got to see them as fathers. The show could have remedied this by having one of their ex girlfriends show up with a kid “Surprize!!” but Im glad they didnt. This would automatically put one brother in the position of Dad, and the other as Uncle and Cas is just that buddy in the trench coat. The way it was done, put all 3 men in a fatherly position that developed over different time lines and circumstances. Im going to try to break this down in an unbias manner. We can all feel free to disagree with the outcome, but its how the show itself unfolded this little highly unorthodox family. Cas was the one appointed to be Jack’s father. Kelly gave this duty to him when she decided to allow herself to die to let her son be born, and Cas accepted. So it looked as though Cas would be this boy’s father, but as it was, Cas was dead when Jack was born. Sam came to the plate next. His relationship developed organically with Jack. Some may not have seen it coming, but Sam was determined long before Jack was born, to NOT kill him, but to try to let him be born without the worry that he would be evil. When it was apparent they couldnt take his grace and make him human, Sam knew it didnt mean Jack HAD to be evil. Sam took the role as mentor right away. Caring for Jack and having genuine compassion for him. We were given the hint Sam felt fatherly when they showed him reading a parenting book. (my god that was the cutest thing) So the writers flipped the script and gave Sam a head start in the father field. Also, with Sam being first, it added this layer of beauty, because Sam fell in paternal love with the son of his torturer. He wasnt enlisted, or pushed, it just happened, and thats beautiful. Dean came last, and as a story teller, I can see why they chose this route. It had been established since S1 that Dean is good with kids and naturally paternal. To have him be the first “father” would leave Cas and Sam on unlevel ground through lack of experience. For Dean to follow up second from Cas, would make it too shippy, and Sam would probably never make it out from under the “uncle” title. and wouldnt we always wonder if Sam held a little resentment inside? Jack being the son of Lucifer for starters, and Dean taking him in as a son? Over the seasons, Sam has made it very clear, he never wants to be #2 in Dean’s eyes, and this could bring around some bad brother drama. Dean starts off hating Jack. Indeed he was way too nasty to him in the beginning. Not even gonna debate that, but for Sam, Dean gives the kid a shot. He discovers that yes, Jack is a good kid and now Deans natural paternal side clicks on. And keep in mind he didnt try to step onSam and take over. Yes they showed Dean and Jack bonding more than they did Sam, but he didnt take over. He made sure taking Jack out was ok with Sam, so did Cas. They both respected that Sam has been Jacks primary care giver since day 1, and Sam isnt selfish or possessive (over anyone/anything else besides Dean) so Sam is happy to share Jack so he can have as much positive influence as he can. So I give TPTB credit for coming up with this formula, my only complaint being that they didnt need to make Dean as hateful as he was, they could have just made him hessitant and standoffish at first and that would have been enough but it is what it is, and that part is over thank Chuck. Now, most of us knew the “3 dads” thing was coming because the cast talked about it a lot, but those of us who dont follow the cons and interviews, still were pleasently surprised that this came about. I havent heard anyone complain that its creepy, even though if you tell someone whos never seen the show “On my show, the 2 brothers and their friend adopted an 18 yr old kid” they’d look at you funny. We complain about the writers all the time because they do screw up a lot, but I like to give them credit when I can. This is one of those situations. They made something that seems creepy on the outside, not only acceptable, but wonderful, simply by how it was written. I feel the same way about how they handled the return of Mary. It didnt pan out as well as it could have, and thats really a whole other meta, but Im glad they didnt take an easy route with her making her a zombie, or Super Mom and put her in a really human position of a mother meeting her adult sons for the first time, but Ill save that for another post :)

#.#Sam Winchester #dean winchester #castiel #jack kline #my meta #jacks 3 dads

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drunklander · 7 years

Text

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 313

Ermagherd guys, Droughtlander. It’s here. But it’s here with Hamilton stuck in our heads, cheesetastic secksi times and the knowledge that the beginning of next season is probs the most like the oh-so-high-up-on-that-pedestal-S1A than anything else in the series. (In a strange new place! Trying to build a home! Except this time they’re doing it together! With the kiddos! Plus a doggo! *grabby hands*)

I know I’ve been on the *cough* less than positive *cough* side of things a lot this season. And last season, if we’re being honest. And I was going to apologize for that, but honestly, I’m not sorry. That’s just how I fan. I flail about what I love, I rant about what I don’t. I’m *very* aware that’s not everyone’s cup of tea and that I’m the sort of fan the cast and crew shit on in interviews and on twitter. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But I enjoyed the finale for what it was. I squee’ed! I yelled things at the teevee! I side-eyed like whoa! So basically the same-ish reaction I’ve had to most of the episodes.

(I never bothered doing a full S2 rewatch, but I might do one for S3 just to see if it flows any better when watched all in one go, but I have a feeling it’ll still feel more like individual units than a cohesive whole.)

Anywho, beer-fueled nonsense that offers nothing of substance under the cut.

Finding more and more that I miss the old-style title cards.

Hard pass on doing this VO twice, tbh. Like we know obvi she’s not going to die. Just have it be where it plays out in the story.

Ok but all I can think about when the carriage stops and the crowd of people walk by is the part in The Mummy when they’re all like zombified and chanting Im-Ho-Tep.

I was just about to snark on Claire apparently having a change of clothes in the damn carriage but alas, we didn’t have to headcanon that she went and changed somewhere. No snarking for me.

Although for fucking serious? She changed back into the same damn outfit?! Ffs. Let the damn woman wear a different dress.

Aw, Fergus lets his wife come with him and doesn’t leave her behind in the woods with Willie. (I heart Marsali.)

“I’ll gut you” is apparently Young Ian’s go-to threat. It’s cute he already has a signature murder-style. Now you just need a rad serial killer name, dude. Take the hiatus to think about it.

This whole thing with Claire and Geillis is like ♬ I know, you know that I’m not telling the truth. ♬

I love that the Army/Navy rivalry spans both time and country.

But for real. Lord John in this scene is my goddamn everything. Sorry, Captain Babyface. I like you, but I need my dude out of those handcuffs and LJG is fucking *bringing it* right now. Can Jamie keep the handcuffs though? They might come in handy once he’s back on the Artemis... ;)

Ok but the final lingering shot of the pining face. Why. It was such a great scene. Lord John helping his buddy. Jamie being like yep, I still get in trouble, thanks for the assist. A nice goodbye. And it could have just ended there and been perfect, but nah, gotta smack everyone over the head with 1000% commitment to my least favorite trope.

#GetJohnABoyfriend2k18

Ah a “why are you here” callback to ep. 111.

For real though, Geillis is fucking nuts. Claire knows Geillis is fucking nuts. Claire knows Geillis has Young Ian. WHY ARE YOU LIKE HAVING CASUAL STORY TIME WITH HER, CLAIRE! DON’T TELL HER THINGS!

CLAIRE WHY ARE YOU TELLING GEILLIS ABOUT GOING BACK TO THE FUTURE! WHY ARE YOU TELLING HER ABOUT BREE! THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA! STOP SHARING THINGS WITH PSYCHOPATHS!

Also, we’re just casually talking about time travel in front of Hercules? I mean, I guess since he’s enslaved, no one gives a shit what he hears because it’s not like he can do anything?

“He was one of my favorites.” She’s fucking nuts but I still do love Geillis.

*zones out through discussions about the mechanics of time travel*

Did you really think you *weren’t* going to get locked in, Claire? YOU KNOW WHAT GEILLIS HAS DONE, YOU WERE CLEARLY GOING TO BE LOCKED IN. BREAK THE FUCKING WINDOW OR SOMETHING IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT.

I get that this is a parallel to the pilot when Claire’s watching the dancers at Craigh na Dun with Frank from the grass, but part of me is still wicked uncomfortable that they’re again using Black people as basically set dressing. I know it’s in the book, I wasn’t a fan of it there either.

How I think of Margaret during her Visions R Us office hours, basically.

Man, they really committed to this damn rabbit and bird thing. Maybe it’s some folks’ jam, but it never really struck a chord for me and the more they kept bringing it up, the more it makes me roll my eyes. Maybe because birds and rabbits were never a thing with Jamie and Claire? So it just seemed wicked random and kind of forced? Whatevs.

Hated Margaret channeling Bree in the book, hate it here.

This whole thing is so much weirder in the book, but just because they made it less weird for the show doesn’t make it good.

Like if we’re getting an exposition dump from Archibald about the prophecy, we really don’t need the weird Bree thing about someone coming to get her.

Yi Tien Cho channeling Inigo Montoya is kind of my everything. “I’m Yi Tien Cho. You are not worthy of this woman. Prepare to die.”

Petition for Rihanna’s “We Found Love” to be Yi Tien Cho and Margaret’s wedding song.

Omg so much explaining what we’ve already all figured out. We need to headcanon like 75% of Jamie and Claire’s reconciliation, but let’s spell out 2378235 different ways what Geillis’ plan is. (Maybe it wasn’t that many ways. But we’re doing a fuckton of exposition dumping in this episode.)

Ok seriously. The guy with the alligator head drinking chicken blood. Ugh. We got white savior stuff last week, but at least Temeraire had a part in the plot and got some agency at the end? Still problematic, but (maybe?) as minimally problematic as it could be if it was going to be included? This is literally just a backdrop for a conversation with Margaret. Blergh...

And then they have them carry off Archibald Campbell as Yi Tien Cho and Margaret look on in horror and omfg this is not good.

(ETA -- In which Roxane Gay says it better than I could: “It’s all very colonial fever dream, not so vaguely racist, and I honestly forced myself to let it go so I could continue with the episode.”)

“We lost Faith. We will not lose Brianna.” This line sure would have hit home a little harder had we actually seen Jamie give a crap about Bree at any point during the season. In the moment it works, but looking over the whole season *weakly gestures, tired of wishing things had been done differently*.

The goodbye kiss just in case though hits me in the feels.

Well isn’t Geillis telling Claire “a life for a life” a nice perversion of Claire telling Jamie that he owed her a life in season two.

And then Jamie grabs her hand all gently and I have feelings about the two of them at the stones/pool, guys.

Why does dead!Geillis look super fake? I have questions.

Slash Young Ian is gathering up jewels or something, right? Before he runs out of the cave? He’s like picking shit up off the ground...

Still could have done without the bones in Joe’s office bit, tbh. But whatever.

I know she’s like a bit traumatized, but Claire holding a bloody machete is my aesthetic.

Awwww, lookit that lil family. *heart eyes*

Omg but the stuff on the ship is the eye of the storm. Like the episode is the storm. And the sex is the eye. Because in the eye of the hurricane, there is quiet. For just a moment. GET IT?! GET IT GUYS?! OK FINE I’LL JUST KEEP SINGING HAMILTON OVER HERE BY MYSELF.

I’m way too proud of myself for this tweet though:

“Surprised I dinna have a full head of white hair, after all I’ve suffered these past few months.” ONE LAST WTF, JAMIE *SIDE-EYE* FOR THE ROAD! (I know Jamie has been through some shit. But literally ever since Claire showed back up, he’s managed to make almost everything about him so even though it’s a little joke, this line is just icing on the omfg, you’re killing me Smalls cake.)

#TeamClairesVeryFineSkin

I for real thought this wasn’t going to make it into the show. I didn’t think the quickie in ep. 309 was going to make it either. Glad they both did.

Claire being like yep, I can remedy the I’m still wearing clothes situation, stat, is my everything.

It’s so cheesy, guys. I love cheese.

Jamie’s bangs though, guys. Can we get the man a new wig haircut before next season?

Omg, that ass grab. That ass grab is my everything. Idk why. But omg. RIP me.

They def have made the sex a little less explicit this year. Except for the rape that they decided to shoot like a softcore porn, wtaf. But like, that doesn’t matter? It’s never been about the amount of skin showing? It’s about showing the two characters being wicked into each other, because if they weren’t then going through all the shit they go through wouldn’t be worth it? I’m *rull* glad that the show has finally realized that that’s an important thing to actually have on screen instead of condescendingly telling us that it doesn’t matter or we should headcanon it like they did all last year.

Ok, here for Claire going full mama bear at Young Ian, but girl. How much doctoring do you really thing you’re going to be able to do in this exact moment if you go up on deck.

Slash, what was she waiting for the whole time everyone else, including the two people she was with, was clearing the deck? I know, I need to just go with it, but this is silly.

Ok this is the only time we needed to see this/hear this VO. Beautifully shot. The Faith music is gorgeous, but like I’m not reading anything into it like she’s watching over them or anything. More just like Claire’s in a liminal state between alive and dead like she was when Faith died.

Dude, kiss your wife when you’re both on the surface and it’s been established she’s alive. (I mean, it’s super sweet, but SWIM, JAMMF, SWIM!)

All snark aside, there’s something a little beautiful about Claire spending half the season basically drowning, unable to really save herself and no one else around who cares enough to save her. And now here she is again, literally drowning and unable to save herself, but this time there’s a handy ginger around to lend a hand. Because she’s not alone anymore. And I have feelings. So many feelings. All the feelings. Feelings.

As they’re floating on their scrap of wood, let me take the obligatory detour into the 20 year old grumble that there was definitely enough room on the door for Jack too. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, ROSE.

The thought of crawling around in the sand in wet clothes gives me hives.

“I told you I’d never leave you again.” ilu, claire bear.

Ok but they’re both so sad that the ship went down and everyone’s dead and stuff and it’s moving and yay for hugs, but like. You know nothing about where you are? Why jump to the worst case scenario? The beach is literally littered with stuff from the ship? You made it so other people might have too? Also, clearly all of the important people lived because otherwise this whole half of the season was pointless?

That being said, these two are really good at making their faces show feelings.

It’s really not a strange question to ask where you are, Jamie. You were in a shipwreck. GPS isn’t a thing. I’d say it’s a pretty normal question to have, bro.

OK BUT LOOK AT CLAIRE’S FACE WHEN SHE SAYS AMERICA HERE COMPARED TO HOW SHE WAS FEELING THE LAST TIME SHE ARRIVED THERE. EVERYTHING IS OK NOW, CLAIRE! I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT THE FRASERS GETTING TO FINALLY START A LIFE TOGETHER, GUYS.

Literaloling over the rando family just walking away like yeah, uh, you guys do you.

fin.

#*#drunj!der yells about outlander #outlander starz #outlander 3x13

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weapon13whitefang · 7 years

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if beth comes back this season, what episode do you think she'd come back in?

S8E5 or S8E8

Why? Well, time for some delusional rambling thoughts I’ve had.

Y’all can blame @bethgreenewarriorprincess and @bethgreeneishopeunseen for this because sometimes I go through and see just what has the Team Defiance people so damn excitable and I think “I can kinda get behind that” or “I get what you’re saying but I feel like you stepped to quick into a sinkhole, friend”.

With TD, I keep seeing stuff about Mirrors. And mirrors keep sticking to me because I have a fascination with the use of mirrors in films, in history, and in superstitions. Mirrors are just fascinating.

I’ve talked about these before, but here are some things I like about Mirror superstitions

If a mirror falls and breaks by itself, someone in the house will soon die.

Someone seeing their reflection in a room where someone has recently died will soon die themselves.

Breaking a mirror will bring seven years of bad luck. This superstition dates back to the Romans, who believed that life renewed itself every seven years and that breaking a mirror would thus cause damage to the soul it was reflecting at the time for that duration. It was also inforced by the rich in the 1700s due to mirrors once being extremely expensive to afford and was meant to scare a worker from breaking the mirror or they’d owe the owner seven years of their life to pay it off.

Some ancient cultures believe that mirrors reflected the ‘shadow soul,’ and could show the true nature of the person being reflected.

In the Jewish religion, it is important to cover all mirrors in a house where someone has died while the family is sitting Shivah (the seven-day mourning period). It is said that if the mirrors aren’t covered, the spirit of the deceased may become trapped in one and not be able to move on to the afterlife.

Some cultures insist that mirrors should be covered at night and when people in the house are sleeping, to make sure that a dreamer’s wandering soul doesn’t get trapped in one. In Serbo-Croatian culture, a mirror was sometimes buried with the dead, both to prevent the spirit from wandering and to keep evil men from rising.

One legend says that viewing a mirror by nothing but candlelight will show you your reflection – and that of any entities inhabiting your home, be they ghosts or otherwise (Hence the whole Bloody Mary thing).

Ideally, no mirror should be hung so low that it “cuts off” the tallest household member’s head because doing so may cause headaches.

Mirrors were often used in magical and psychic rituals for scrying – remotely viewing another person or place – and communicating. They could also be used in magical rituals of divination – fortune telling and reading of the future.

Ancient Chinese believed that mirrors frightened away evil spirits who were scared by their own appearance. If the mirror was broken, the protection was lost.

Mirrors have also been used in many cases of literature. Here’s to name a few:

Snow White by The Brothers Grimm

The Queens Magic Mirror

The Lady of Shalott by Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Lady is condemned to watch the world indirectly, via a mirror that exhibits to her the shifting scenes of Camelot.

Through the Looking-Glass by Lewis Carroll

Alice steps through the mantel place mirror into a reverse world.

Dracula by Bram Stoker

Jonathan Harker realizes he’s in trouble when he can’t see Dracula’s reflection in a mirror.

Richard II by William Shakespear

Richard calls for a mirror to smash just before he’s about to be removed by Henry

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone by J.K. Rowling

The Mirror of Erised (The Mirror of Desire) is mentioned by Dumbledore to show the “deepest, most desperate desire of our hearts.” and has been known to drive men mad.

Mirrors are used in films, television, songs, art, books, and common objects found around many households. There are superstitions and legends and all kinds of shit that float around mirrors… And to me that’s fascinating. So you can imagine why the concept of mirrors speaks to me in all this craze.

Now you asked, which episode do I see as being the return episode. I gave you two answers, but my first one is the main belief because of the fact that 8x5 is episode 5x8 backward… Episode 5x8 was “CODA”, the episode where Beth was shot down. Episode 8x5 is supposed to be called “THE BIG SCARY U” (Very odd name they have coming for these next few episodes in fact - “Some Guy”, “The Big Scary U”, “The King, The Widow, and Rick”, and ”Count to 5″)

I say 5x8 because everyone wants to talk about “Alice Through The Looking Glass” - a book I mentioned above - where Alice walks through the mirror above the mantel place and ends up in a world that’s a reverse (a backward) world of the one she knows.

Which would play into this theme of “what was isn’t what is”, to put it in simple terms. We saw that with Morales’ return. Morales was a friend of Rick and Daryl’s, but now he is Negan (Well technically he ain’t shit now cause he’s dead but you get what I mean).

Basically, I’m thinking that Beth coming back could play out as a reverse of the last time we saw her. The last episode we saw Beth alive was in 5x8. What could happen is that in 8x5 we get a full on, no doubt about it, reveal of Beth being alive. I don’t know what she’s doing or where she is… But we get this shot that openly proves to everyone watching, that we are seeing Beth Greene. No words are said. And it’s not a long enough shot to give us too much. But it’s her. We see Beth shot down at the end of CODA… What if we see her standing up and alive at the end of THE BIG SCARY U? That is a reverse of what we saw in 5x8.

8x8 is me wondering if they’re going to play Beth as a Coda again. At the end of season 5A, Beth died. But at the beginning of 5B, Beth appears again as a sickness mind trip of Tyreese in 5x9. S5E8 was the 59th episode overall of TWD.

S8E8 will be the 107th episode of TWD overall. That’s 48 episodes between them… For those of you who find significance in the importance of numbers and their meaning, here are a few things about 48 you can read (x).

The overall thing I took from that is the following:

The number 48 is especially adept with visual and auditory artistic expression — painting, sculpting, decorating, music, and so forth.

Although business oriented, 48 is even more a social number. It supports and encourages the creative expression of others. And it tends to raise the level of optimism when participating in activities of a group.

The energy the number 48 represents includes imagination, effective communication, tolerance, joyfulness, optimism, and dynamism.

Take what you will from that… But if we wanna be fair to 8x5, that’s 45 episodes between them. And from the same link above, reading about 45, here;’s the things that stuck out to me:

If the number 45 is in the heart’s desire position of the chart, it means the person really, really wants to do something with a large positive impact on the welfare of humanity.

If the number 45 is in the personality position of the chart, it means the person tends to present themselves as a tolerant and humanitarian individual.

With a number 45 prominent somewhere in a person’s environment, interpret the situation as if it included humanitarianism, idealism, getting things done, and/or whim.

These two numbers both represent tolerance and encouragement of getting something done and helping out a group… Seems pretty accurate for what is going down and what is needed.

Anyway, what I see possibly happening is that in 8x8 we hear Beth’s voice or we see a distorted image of her. Kind of like how she’s not really there when Tyreese is dying. How she’s not the one driving the truck, but Rick. Someone may see Beth but instead of it being her, the person thinks it’s just them going crazy or hearing/seeing shit. In 8x8 could be 5x9′s reverse/backward world and then in 8x9 we have a full shot of Beth and then 5x10 could be a flashback series… Basically it could go backwards. We last saw her in Sasha’s flashback and before that it was as Tyreese’s delusion and then before that it was Coda as a limp “corpse” in Daryl’s arms. Maybe this time it’s all backwards.

Im starting to ramble.. Sorry, Nonny! This was longer than i meant it to be. Didn’t mean to dump that on you!

#twd #team whatever happens will happen #team defiance #team delusional #team I don’t care but I’m having fun okay

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afoolsingenuity · 7 years

Text

Bite Sized Books // Where I Declare My Love For Mariana Zapata’s Books

I have been intending to write a review for Mariana Zapata’s books for a good long while. A month, even! I read them when I was on holiday and adored them in every way. At least, the first ones I read (the two I read when I got home weren’t quite as good but they showed great potential). I knew I wanted to tell you guys how brilliant they were but I really couldn’t find the words to say why other than to flail and say read them! I still knew I had to feature them, though. There are just some books you have to talk about even when you’re utterly inelegant about them. I mean, even Zapata’s worst books were enjoyable they just weren’t up to scratch to my favourites from her.

The Ones I Adored

The Wall of Winnipeg and Me – Mariana Zapata

Published: 28th February 2016 Source: Bought Genre: Sports romance, Contemporary, Adult My Rating:

Vanessa Mazur knows she's doing the right thing. She shouldn't feel bad for quitting. Being an assistant/housekeeper/fairy godmother to the top defensive end in the National Football Organization was always supposed to be temporary. She has plans and none of them include washing extra-large underwear longer than necessary.

But when Aiden Graves shows up at her door wanting her to come back, she's beyond shocked.

For two years, the man known as The Wall of Winnipeg couldn't find it in him to tell her good morning or congratulate her on her birthday. Now? He's asking for the unthinkable. What do you say to the man who is used to getting everything he wants?

This was the first book from Zapata I heard about. I am a girl who loves romance, and more specifically sports romance, and I also adore fake relationships so when I heard there was a book which included all three of them you can bet I was interested in reading. Only problem? It was over 600 pages long. The average romance is like 300 pages, you can imagine I was intimidated by a book which was twice that. It’s why I didn’t bother buying until I knew I had all the time in the world to read it, when I was on holiday. I almost didn’t pick it up even then, luckily I avoided that mistake and found my first of my favourites from Zapata.

I adored Vanessa, she puts up with no crap and she didn’t swoon for Aiden just because he was some hot shot NFL player. She didn’t care. He had been a means to an end so could pursue her career. She handed in her notice and didn’t look back and I didn’t blame her as Aiden was annoying as hell, he was an island, and he didn’t stand up for her. She would have stayed focused an independent from Aiden if he hadn’t offered something she wanted, money to truly give her the independence she craved, she just had to marry him to help him stay in the US. Easy, right?

Well, it’s safe to say from there I fell in love as Aiden stayed being gruff and focused, but a little less of an island under Vanessa's influence. And I adored it. I didn’t even notice the length of the book because I was so invested in these characters. I swooned and sighed and grinned like and idiot and fell head over heels. I truly did, this was the best. Don’t be put off by the length but strap yourself in for a slow… very slow ride. This is the ultimate of slowburn. The romance moves at a glacial pace and it might frustrate the hell out of some. I was on the edge of my seat and loved every minute, though.

Dear Aaron – Mariana Zapata

Published: 10th June 2017

Source: Bought

Genre: Romance, Contemporary, Adult/New Adult

My Rating:

Ruby Santos knew exactly what she was getting herself into when she signed up to write a soldier overseas.

The guidelines were simple: one letter or email a week for the length of his or her deployment. Care packages were optional.

Been there, done that. She thought she knew what to expect.

What she didn’t count on was falling in love with the guy.

Then onto the second of Zapata’s books which I read. I hadn’t got this one on my radar until Nick reviewed it (funny how Nick often is the person who puts romance on my radar). I wasn’t quite as eager to get a hold of this one because Nick had said the pacing was a bit off with some of the romance and that it could have been shorter, the concern I had when it came to buying Wall of Winnipeg. I went ahead, though, because I loved the idea of a couple writing to one another and falling love. The concept slayed me and the reality was even better than expected.

Ruby and Aaron were so cute together. Ruby was brilliant and I loved that she lived with her parents still but was pursuing her career because I live at home too and it isn’t great but it’s a good means to and end. And Aaron was great building this friendship with Ruby as one of his few contacts back home so he could cope throughout his deployment.

I adored it and was totally sucked in from the start. I was gone for Aaron and adored Ruby from the very beginning. She was way geekier than me but I totally got her and her fandom ways and her quirkiness and how utterly why she is. I just connected with her straight away as I saw a lot of myself in her.

I loved how the format of the book demonstrated the progression in the relationship. We begin with emails being sent with them being a bit awkward as hey got to know one another and slowly connect. It then changes to IMs as the pair get closer and talk more often and it develops as they grow closer. It totally worked and I loved it.

This was such a cute book and I was expecting it to be angstier because Aaron was in the army but it actually was way more cute and fun and I loved it for that. It was nothing like I thought and everything which I wanted in a romance. I had a silly grin going on while I was reading and I'm not ashamed of that fact.

Kulti – Mariana Zapata

Published: 20th March 2015 Source: Bought Genre: Romance, Contemporary, Sports Romance, Adult My Rating:

“Trust me, I’ve wanted to punch you in the face a time or five.”

When the man you worshipped as a kid becomes your coach, it’s supposed to be the greatest thing in the world. Keywords: supposed to.

It didn’t take a week for twenty-seven-year-old Sal Casillas to wonder what she’d seen in the international soccer icon—why she’d ever had his posters on her wall, or ever envisioned marrying him and having super-playing soccer babies.

Sal had long ago gotten over the worst non-break-up in the history of imaginary relationships with a man that hadn’t known she’d existed. So she isn’t prepared for this version of Reiner Kulti who shows up to her team’s season: a quiet, reclusive, shadow of the explosive, passionate man he’d once been.

Nothing could have prepared her for the man she got to know.

Or the murderous urges he brought out in her.

“Sal, please don’t make me visit you in jail. Orange isn’t your color.”

This was going to be the longest season of her life.

And then the third, and in some ways my favourite. I actually had to figure out how to connect my Kindle to my phones internet to read this one while I was away because I brought it halfway through reading Dear Aaron because I knew I needed to read more Zapata and especially this one. It was another that had come onto my radar when I heard of Wall of Winnipeg because sports romance! I was put off by the fact it was a football (soccer) romance because I am not a huge fan of football, I see it enough on TV at home, do I really need to read a romance about it too. Also, the last sports romance which involved football I tried to read was Scoring Wilder and I hated it so I thought I might not like Kulti I was convinced by the fact Zapata wrote it and I am so glad I was.

I think this one clicked for me because I adored the fact it was a romance with an age gap. I was full on in love with Kulti too. Also, it was so similar to Pitch and my favourite ship in that (Mike/Ginny 4eva) that I was fully in love from the beginning.

This one was an enemies to lover romance and it was spot on. Even better, Sal wasn’t the usual girl in her early twenties falling in love but instead 27 and had several years playing on the football team who was focused on her career. She was determined to be the best she could be (with a few exceptions) and she was determined to do her best. And Reiner Kulti was a grumpy guy who had passed the peak in his career and who really didn’t want to be coaching when he was a world famous player. And he had been a dick to Sal’s brother and was basically horrible to anyone he spoke to and so Sal wasn’t willing to put up with crap from him at all.

I loved the dynamic between the two whenever they spoke and how throughout the book they grew closer. First, they became friends before any hope of romance happened. And then there was Sal’s family! I adored her parents and would have happily had them feature far more in the book. I would return to read more about Kulti and Sal’s life given half a chance.

This was the best kind of sports romance for me. It was about a female athlete for once and was absolutely brilliant. It even had a really good age difference romance for me to love. I will read all the books!

The Ones I Liked Less

Under Locke – Mariana Zapata

Published: 19th January 2014

Source: Bought

Genre: Contemporary, Romance

My Rating:

He was my boss, my brother’s friend, a Widower, an ex-felon, and a man I’d seen casually with a handful of women. But he was everything that gripped me, both the good and the bad. Worst case scenario if things turned awkward between us, I could go somewhere else. I’d gotten over epic heartbreak before, one more wouldn’t kill me.

After moving to Austin following six months of unemployment back home, Iris Taylor knows she should be glad to have landed a job so quickly... even if the business is owned by a member of the same motorcycle club her estranged father used to belong to. Except Dex Locke might just be the biggest jerk she’s ever met. He’s rude, impatient and doesn’t know how to tell time.

And the last thing they ever expected was each other.

But it was either the strip club or the tattoo shop.

… she should have chosen the strip club.

It just makes me sad when you read a book which doesn't work for you from an author you love. I mean, I still haven’t read all of Zapata’s books so there is still a chance there are more from her I don’t like but it made me sad as this was the first book by her I didn’t adore. It was partially a me thing for me to dislike it. I wasn’t a fan of the whole motorcycle gang aspect of the book. I may have enjoyed Sons of Anarchy but it’s a bit iffy when it comes to gang things. Also, when I began reading it was the last day on my holiday and my brain wasn’t totally focused on the book. That lack of focus when it came to reading this meant I didn’t become fully absorbed either.

It had all the usual marks of a Mariana Zapata book but it just missed the mark for me. I think it was the fact it was a biker gang book and Dex was just not what I wanted. He came across as a dick (hence the nickname in the book) and whilst he revealed a softer side his dickish tendencies were too much for me.

It was a good read for some, I’m sure, but not for me. It makes me sad but there always has to be one, right?

Lingus – Mariana Zapata

Published: 7th August 2015 Source: Bought Genre: Contemporary, Romance My Rating:

Most people would describe Katherine Berger as a responsible girl with a big heart, a loyal friend who takes care of those close to her, and the possessor of a wicked sense of humor. There was something about her that most people didn't know. "My name is Kat Berger, and I love porn."

When twenty-five-year-old Kat is dragged to a porn convention by her best friend, she's both embarrassed and nervous. The last thing she ever expected was to meet someone who makes her laugh like no other. This is a story about acceptance and friendship, and a love born out of the most unexpected of places.

This was a really good friends to lovers story and I enjoyed it. I didn't fall head over heels for it like Zapata's later books but you can see the essence of the great stories she writes and I did enjoy it. This only ended up on the bad list because I wasn’t head over heels and totally absorbed like I expected to be.

The book starts at a porn convention so it was safe to say I was a little hesitant going in to see whether I'd like it. Turns out it was hilarious and I enjoyed it. Sure, occasionally Kat and her friends seemed a bit OTT, almost like caricatures of who they really were because they were too much. But I did enjoy it and I loved Kat's close-knit group of friends and how they were all so close.

I thought some stuff went too fast in this book and some things too slow but the pacing wasn't a major issue. It was the first time I felt like a Zapata book was a touch too long though. I actually noticed a bit of a drag in the story towards the end.

As a whole it's a funny romance that I enjoyed as a weekend read. It may not have ticked all my boxes but it did tick a lot of them.

Now I have declared my undying love for Mariana Zapata I feel a strong need to go read those last two books by her. Who was the last author whose entire backlist you went and bought after one book? And any awesome romance authors you feel the need to recommend?

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#a fool's ingenuity #books

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