#im paraphrasing here but that just happened

[savage-rhi]

Magentah

[xxplastic-cubexx]

WAIT WAIT WAIT CHERIK MPREG IS CANON

i cannot stress enough how canon cherik mpreg is, yes my friend

[jils-things]

im honestly so glad i never found myself relying on chatgpt or any ai that is supposed to help you in homework. its really embarrassing when a professor finds out

[red-dyed-sarumane]

im already at like 51% in kamicity ensemble & im still losing my mind over the fucking "aww rime are u in love ur thinking about someone again" "WHAT. NO. also how did u know im thinking about anyone. but i do keep thinking about rim." "see u love rim" "NO. its the same kind of feeling i have for u and the others. why are u blushing" "u basically just said u love me" "NOT LIKE THAT. AS A FRIEND." "well i think its okay to love a human or a girl or yourself" this reads like a fuckign fanfic i cant believe this is official

[aria0fgold]

I'm coming for jokid next-- I'm coming for the pairs that had gripped me in a way that this song's hold on me is so unreal that I have to pass it onto my favourite pairings.

[phantomrose96]

twice now ive started and not finished silt verses. (no particular reason i didnt finish, ive really enjoyed it both times and keep thinking that i gotta get back to it.)

a moment that really hit me, and i think i'll always remember, is in hayward's first episode. the series starts with carpenter, so we know that worshipping the trawlerman is illegal and a bit about what that worship is like, but not much about how worshipping other gods works. even with the deer/hound people (who i forget if they happened before or after hayward's intro), that's another illegal and hidden religion. it leaves space to assume that the deadliness and the human sacrifice is WHY these gods are forbidden.

and then hayward's ep happens. and he says, offhand, like it's something completely unremarkable (paraphrased), 'people following those kinds of gods wouldn't get in trouble over it if they could just be reasonable about these things. there's a right and wrong way to do this, like how every new building starts construction by drowning two criminals in the cement foundation.' hearing that, and hearing how casual he was about it, i felt my entire understanding of the setting shift drastically.

legality wasn't about whether a group of worshippers do or don't kill. it was about what worshippers kill the acceptable targets, in the right way. and suddenly i find myself much more distrustful of a society that's motivated to create acceptable targets than i ever was of how carpenter and faulkner do things.

its a really chilling and well done bit of writing.

someday ill get past five episodes. im sure i'll really enjoy it.

Yes!!! YES!!!!

I've mentioned once or twice in my ramblings here that that was also my biggest "Oh" moment for TSV.

I started out episode 1 vaguely thinking of Carpenter and Faulkner as if you'd made a podcast following TMA Avatars as main characters. We know right off the bat the Trawlerman's people are human-sacrificing cultists. Obviously Nana Glass wasn't a good person. She killed people! And she got killed in a police stand-off because she was a mass murderer. And we know Carpenter and Faulkner are following in her same line of work so, really, we're following antagonists aren't we?

And then my "Oh" came later with (not necessarily that Hayward scene specifically) but when I went "Oh. The Trawlerman's people are being persecuted by the authorities not because they're human-sacrificing cultists. But because they're the losing human-sacrificing cultists."

Because actually, the legal authorities, the politicians, the corporations, are all very much part of human-sacrificing religions. That part is allowed. These "backwards hick" gods are illegal and horrible, because their kind of human sacrifice is uncivilized. Unlike the civilized people's human sacrifice, which is allowed because the corporations and the institutions have okayed it :).

They do so much with it over the series.

Also I see you're only on episode 5 so actually I'm putting this part beneath a readmore since I checked and this is about episode 7

The episode with Paige recounting what happened to Vaughan is what drove it in for me, I think. It plays out line-for-line like a corporation going through lay-offs "These are tough times :(. We understand this is difficult for everyone leaving us today :(." but they are... just... allowed to kill these employees they're letting go in a ritual sacrifice. To a legal god. And Paige thinks surely they won't--surely good people won't do that--but they do, very much, kill Vaughan.

Money is tight and times are hard and ritualistic human sacrifice is, in fact, incredibly allowed... As long as you're one of the legal powers, doing it the correct way.

[genderqueerdykes]

Just wanted to say thank you for providing an easy and calm way to learn about intersex!

I tried to step into it in 2024 cuz I wanted to learn more about it, how it affected people, and what I as a perisex person could do to be supportive, etc. but when I first tried to open a conversation with anyone and ask questions I got zero answers and a whole lot of "Our lives suck and it's the trans communities fault!!" (obviously paraphrasing but that's what the majority of it sounded like).

I was even accused of "Being trans intersex" which I never said I was, I mentioned I was trans and asked if/how the communities overlap and apparently it's impossible for trans people to try and learn about intersex people without malicious intent??? Easy to say I noped out pretty quickly cuz I felt no need to support a community that seemed to have so much aggression towards my own.

And then I started following your blog back in mid December I'm pretty sure and the first few intersex posts I saw I didn't pay too much attention to but as of recently I've actually started to open more and trying to properly read them through or check out intersex articles you share, like the ones from a week or so ago and it's really helped me get a new understanding of the whole group! Still trying to get a grasp on how to best be supporting but I'll get there eventually!! :)

- ☣️ anon

hey, you got it! i appreciate you for reaching out and letting me know, the thing is that's why i just try to focus on information when possible. i don't like assuming the worst in every single person who asks a question. information is hard to find on intersex variations, people, bodies, and lives. google is virtually no help. posts on here tend to err on the hostile side, which is just. sigh. why does this have to happen in every pocket of the community?

unfortunately, that is the point that we're at right now and i'm sorry to hear it, but i'm glad that you've found my blog helpful! i don't like the state of affairs with much of our queer communities in general, because hostility tends to be the first expression and it's not a good way to help people learn. so many intersex people are tired of having to explain things and have becoming disenfranchised and jaded and respond with a "we shouldn't have to teach you (everything)," and it's like. well... yeah. that's kinda on us.

so many times have seen "just google it dumbass" type behavior from other intersex people and i really hate it it. i don't get why the intersex community is so focused on alienating people like that. and i don't get why someone would accuse someone else of being trans intersex like that. also i've had to calm down about it too but we gotta stop taking everyone else in bad faith and assuming the worst. i get that we're hurting but we really have to calm down and explain things kindly. its not hurting anyone to be kind

frankly i don't like the amount of transphobia coming from a lot of intersex people right now. it makes me so tired. that's such an awful attitude, as if being intersex somehow absolves one from other types of bigotry. it doesn't... intersexism isn't "more" important than transphobia. you don't get to be transphobic to someone just because they may have hurt you, especially if it was on accident. please don't hurt someone if they hurt you on accident.

i honestly am very deeply sorry about all of this happening. at this point i'm just very tired and i don't want people to hurt each other for no reason. but thank you for sending such a kind message, i'm glad i'm able to provide an opportunity for people to learn! i really just want to talk about it without having to get mad. ive done it before and at this point im just tired. i dont like the default emotion being anger in intersex spaces. i don't participate in any intersex communities rn for that purpose. im trans.

i found out i was intersex thru trans people and the trans community. and it wasn't people who identified as trans intersex or anything it was just people who knew intersex bodies were a thing. i don't know why so many intersex people take every little thing a trans person wants to do with their body so personally i can get that a lot of things really are intersexist but honestly it's so overdone at this point. i really don't have an issue with a lot of things anymore because it all feels so petty. like at a point its not productive and getting angry at everything that involves a body that doesn't fit into the male-female body that doesn't explicitly say intersex and intersex only. we do not own the c oncept of having a non conformative body. please leave perisex trans people alone if they're looking for information and not harming anyone. it's not helping them understand us better.

take care anon! stay safe! i'm glad i can help give some information on the subject!

[richonnesbitch]

Any favorite Richonne moments? Rewatching season 6 and forgot about Michonne immediately slamming the woman who punched Rick. I couldn’t help but think how that meme of kevin hart being held is so Richonne coded lmao

Every richonne moment is my favorite moment tbh 😂

I, too, really love when Michonne body slammed that random woman who punched Rick. And it being directly after their first night together makes it sexier. Like that is HER man, she's decided. Like, they're so iconic. Imagine every scene with your ship being their best scene. That's crazy!

But to answer your question I'll name a few of moments I especially love. Some of these are probably underrated, others probably not. It's not gonna be in any type of order because it's too hard to rank lol. But here are five.

1: Taking Judith To Hilltop

Whenever Carl is dying and Alexandria is getting bombed by the saviors, the group decides they need to evacuate to Hilltop. Rick asks Michonne, the person he trusts most in the world, to take Judith to Hilltop. And we all know how much Rick (and Michonne) loves his children so this was definitely a huge thing to ask. I just find it beautiful the amount of trust he has in her. I love that Andy quote where he's like "Rick trusts her with his life and his children's lives." I can't remember the full quote so I'm definitely paraphrasing but it's a great moment. And unfortunately I can't find a picture of the moment either.

2: Mowing Down Walkers with the RDIM

This whole scene is just so crazy to me. It starts off with Michonne annoyed she has to just stand around while everyone else does all the work. Fed up, she decides to ignore Thorne and take charge. She grabs the RDIM and runs and runs and runs pretty far away from everyone else, mowing down walkers along the way. And then all of a sudden who appears next to her? Rick. Do you know how fast he would have to have been running to catch up with her? He's crazy lmao! It's also really sweet in another way too because he knows she might get in trouble for this so he gets himself in trouble with her. Partners in crime! And also im sure he couldn't just let her run into a horde of walkers by herself. Anyway, they mow down the walkers and then Rick sets the RDIM up to explode and grabs Michonne's hand and runs away from the impending explosion with her. And if you notice when they go behind the tree, Rick puts her ahead of himself. He also shields her body with his when the explosion happens. We know what happens next. They start staring into each other's eyes and neither of them are capable of resisting each other so they have a little makeout session complete with tonguing and moaning. Classic richonne. Noticing their connection, Michonne says "come on" referring to how he should leave with her. He warns that "They'll find us, they will." She tells him "we'll make it so they can't." And he's under her spell so of course all his most recent refusal just goes out the window as he tells her "not like this." It ends with a signature forehead touch. I feel like this is a thing richonne generally does when they feel distant from one another. Physical touch is big for them so I feel like the forehead touching is a way to reconnect them I think. It's beautiful. So anyway they head back to the rest of the group to help. Thorne's goofy ass decides that Michonne, or Dana, is more trouble than she's worth and aims her big gun at her. Somehow Michonne's bodyguard Rick notices this immediately. It's crazy how he ALWAYS has eyes on her to protect her. No wonder she said she only feels safe with him. He sticks himself between the gun and Michonne, blocking her from Thorne's view and successfully saving her from being killed. I love seeing how protective Rick is of his lady.

3: Rv Hand Hold

So after their first kiss and first night together, they are tragically robbed of the chance to spend the morning together when Jesus lets himself into their home to speak to Rick. This world moves fast so they don't really get the time to breathe before Jesus and the rest of the group are on their way to Hilltop. Michonne sits bashfully in the passenger seat, wondering if last night meant as much to Rick as it did to her. And Rick notices this (because he always has eyes on her) and eases her mind by grabbing her hand. Of COURSE it meant as much to him as it did to you.

4: Michonne Saving Rick From Winslow

So I've talked about how much I love Rick being protective of Michonne but I also love when Michonne is protective of Rick. Okay so this moment happens when Rick and Michonne are trying to recruit those worthless useless garbage people to fight against the saviors. Their leader (who I'm not naming because fuck that bitch) wants to put Rick to the test like the dumbass she is. To test him, she decides to take him "up, up, up" which is code for "throw you in a hole you can't climb out of with no weapons while a spiked walker comes at you." Michonne, sensing this bullshit, nervously grabs Rick's hand to stop him. She goes to say something but Rick stops her and comforts her. He goes up there anyway and gives Michonne a reassuring nod once up there. The leader says some sort of bullshit to him, I don't know what because I zone out any time she speaks. Anyway she pushes him down the hole. Michonne screams at her "what did you do?!?!" before running to find Rick by looking through a hole. She yells his name and he looks around confusedly for a few seconds before figuring out where her voice is coming from. He lets her know he's okay. And then Winslow comes at him. Again he has no weapon so he frantically tries to climb out but to no avail. Michonne watching this through the hole yells directions to him. "The walls. USE them!" And he does! And it works! Michonne's plan works and she saves his life. It's just a fun example of how Michonne's guidance always helps Rick.

5: Unclenching His Fist

So after a very endearing family fun day for the Grimes family, it sadly gets cut short when Scott (or whatever his name is) delivers the news that some random ex savior (that really no one cares about) got killed by someone. This is bad news and Rick is visibly upset by this. Michonne notices this and reaches a hand out to him.

His hand is closed and she gently opens it.

She not only comforts him but let's him know this burden isn't only his. It's hers too. And that they will get through this together. Michonne has always been able to comfort Rick in a way no one else can and vice versa.

So in conclusion, these are just a few moments I really love and why I love them. Again I wanna say that every moment is my favorite richonne moment so this is definitely not a ranked list. I had to limit myself to just five because I could go on and on and on and on and on and on if you let me 😂 but if you wanna know more of my favorite moments I don't mind sharing them. Thanks for the ask! This was so fun to write.

[thetisming]

i genuinely wish i could articulate my thoughts on nicky because sometimes i think it comes off as just 'hes gay and makes me sad' because thats easy to say and articulate but like. he is a character who doesnt matter. not just like tamara and micah and yuri and luca and flint, but he isnt in the story. hes optional. and like, hes really fucking strong. hes been training most likely his WHOLE LIFE. of course hes strong. he doesnt matter. hes optional and you simply dont have to see him and his dad doesnt even seem to care about him and ??? i know a lot of what im saying has been said but bear with me here. and understand that ! some of it i was thinking before i saw other people say it. which just means im right. anyways. 👍. also i talk about oliver a lot here because. well you ujderstand

"sometimes i pretend the whole reason this tournament exists is so that my father and i could fight each other. but i suppose that wont be happening now..."

"nicky?"

"ah, oliver! don't worry. i need not be consoled."

paraphrasing because i dont remember but! fuck!!! all he wanted was to impress his dad! and then when oliver tries to console him he just brushes it off!!!!!!

something else is that. he knows about the prophecy. he knows what the point is. the winner defeats the wizard king. and yet he still wants to win. isnt that fucked? he knows and yet he wants to win to impress his dad. this is something i think about all the time. hes willing to be doomed forever, just so his dad will be proud of him.

and like, again hes been training forever. and then what, this other kid comes along and he arrived in this world like, maybe a week ago? and he still wins. whatever. this is lightweight. but he keeps winning and it isnt fair because hes been training his whole life. and then he wins. he actually wins ultra-ultimate. and he goes on to defeat the wizard king, the thing he wanted to do to make his dad proud.

and then theres like. nickiver, right? sure, this kid is winning the tournaments but thats fine. because it isnt the main one. and hes pretty. and hes firery and stubborn and hes strong and he fights on his level and it's fun and theyre nemises and they argue. and this kid is also just fucking clueless when it comes to any hints about nicky's crush. and then this kid wins ultra-ultimate. and then he sees this kid win pandora's box. and maybe now, if he didnt before, he fully understands the complete weight of defeating the wizard king. because he loves this boy, and he opened the box. he opened the fucking box and he climbed the tower and if he didnt arrive in the world. nicky wouldve done that. for his dad. for his dad's thousand year revenge quest. and again he loves oliver. and he sees him change after defeating the wizard king and maybe they get married and maybe for a bit theyre happy. but oliver defeated the wizard king, which is what nicky was meant to do. it's a good thing he didnt. or maybe not, because it came at the price of oliver.

and like, hes a kid. okay. hes maybe 13, 14, around oliver's age. and he loves fighting and familiars and i doubt he has any friends and i doubt he has anyone. but then he has oliver and oliver is nice but also argues and hes so clueless and hes perfect. hes the perfect guy and nicky loves him and theyre friends (despite their nemisis status). but again oliver defeats the wizard king. and yeah i think nicky probably befriends esther but. he had oliver. oliver was possibly his first non-familiar friend (i do think his familiars are his friends even after the whole thing) and he has him and then he doesnt. and he slips away because of that fucking prophecy. and hes gone.

and also, nicky's scared of being unimportant. he wants to matter. he wants to impress his dad he wants to be important. and hes fucking not, and it's heartbreaking. he was removed from wotww. i say this a lot but every other named character had a cameo. almost every place had a mention. but not nicky (and not giovanni either) (unless you count. french car guy.). nicky doesnt matter. nickys unimportant. nicky doesnt impress his dad. he matters so much to me but overall oliver is the hero of the story so oliver is going to win. nicky is optional in dotdd but god thats better than him not being an option at all.

and something i always think about with the hope and hopelessness line is. nicky holds onto hope. and oliver doesnt. nicky, the neglected, optional, moon coded boy, holds onto hope. and oliver, the loved, hero, adored, sun coded boy holds onto hopelessness. we're given every reason to think it wouldnt be like that. but nicky holds onto hope and oliver doesnt and of course oliver doesnt because hes the hero. hes the pure-hearted one. these things dont just go well. hes the pure hearted one so of course he wants to defeat a great evil, even if it ruins him.

but nicky? he holds onto hope in the end. hope. the character who would make perfect sense to be hopeless, hes the one who holds onto hope. he has hope. maybe hope is all he has. either way, he holds onto hope. and that drives me crazy.

and hes also fun. hes a fun character! hes dramatic and his lines are cute and hes clearly in love with oliver and hes funny and charming! all of this tragedy, and hes so charming still. and i think that does a lot. like, a silly character who says things like 'exactly as i expected... from my NEMISIS!!!!!!!!!' and then you find out hes tragic and his father is neglectful and hes moon coded and he has a moon charm on his coat?? LIKE!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! AWESOME. and to top it all off. hes even gay.

anyway i love nicky i hope this ?? made sense. if it ever seems like my thoughts on him dont go deep they do im just awful at words & enjoy to make silly posts. i like him a lot

[glitchedmagic]

okay. under the assumption that namemc spoilers are a troll, i think i have my final wildcard prediction:

gem and pearl said (paraphrasing) that the mobs were all weird and that wasn't really the wildcard nor a spoiler. it's the last episode, so presumably grian didn't want everyone to die to random wildcard effects (some people was probably fine)

so my prediction is decaying/corrupting world. something about the world is falling apart. maybe gravity changes? blocks getting replaced? shrinking world border? idk exactly but i feel like this would be fun for a couple of reasons

a sense of finality to the season. it has to end here because the world is literally falling apart

a deadline. its got to be tempting for the cc's to drag out the last session and try and gear up/prepare/get enough content. this puts a hard clock on the season

a strangely thematic ending (imo). this world was weird and wild. things happened that were not supposed to happen. eventually all of that energy had to break and the world broke too

the fanart would fuck. just. so hard. after a season of ridiculousness, the drama artists deserve to go ham

anyways even if this isn't the wildcard, im going to hc the server corrupting as the season ends. a treat for me

[feketeribizli]

okay gax divorce is extremely intriguing to me i have to admit, but for the life of me i can't figure out what it's about. what happened man 😭😭

might be exposing myself here as ive been only focusing on the results and not how we got here lmao but basically the jist of it from how ive been perceiving this is:

during qualifying max impended george which IS dangerous and normally gets penalized but from what i know they were both on outlaps so it doesnt fucking matter. to me at least. max gets pole george is p2 with a 0.055 difference (which is hot and means a lot to me because i thought merc would be flopping hard. cause thats what we do now)

come race day and max gets a one-grid penalty, george inheriting pole which again. is not a big deal to me (i cheered i wont lie) cause youre still front row and you literally said youll get the lead back in turn one. which you did and you won and hes humbled and humiliated in p4 (my man got fucked with the tyre strategy i just want to point that out. i loved the double overtake hazing ritual he got tho)

max radio after the race shading george and talking about karma (it was funny. bit cringe if you ask me. and why did horner yabba dabba doo on saturday)

and we couldve moved on soooooo fast but comes the post-race press and obviously they have to bring the debacle up and max starts airing shit out (screw someone... like... sexc 🥹). according to him george pulled some next level snake shit with the stewards to get him penalized (everyone wouldve done that) and he basically called george a two-faced skanky ass hoe (drivers act different behind the cameras? should we be surprised? should we call mohammed ben suleyman?)

allegedly max said some other, worse shit that i wish we had on camera but we only got ted kravitz paraphrasing it as "you and your fia mates" which is becoming a point of contention here (as george is the head of the drivers association that has been trying to stand up against the fia for better and more clear rules and regulations, right now mainly in support of max against the stupid punishments he got) (max, whos running to the head of fia on his own. tho im not too clear on this but if we wanna get serious about this it needs to be said) (this situation is also like a free blocklist cause some of yall have real braindead takes on it)

tldr; guy who maximalizes 100% of the track vs guy who maximalizes 100% of the book of regulations. these two have a history of clashes so something like this was bound to happen again 😁

it just really gets me because as a regular guy all of this seems so small and inconsequental to me and these two (well. max mostly) managed to blew it up so much

[loquarocoeur]

then i need to ask, in yours (yes, the original fic) there was a paragraph, (and i’m paraphrasing here) that went smth like:

max doesn’t know what him being all sweet with kids does to charles.

so i’ve just been thinking about lestappen + kid(s) for a like week or something.

i’ve been having my own thought about it, especially on maxs side, because i can see two things happening there. either, he wants kids, and he’d be the best dad, like, ever, (ice cream before dinner and buying the kid everything it wants, spoiling it to the level charles does leo in puppy eyes does) OR he says (i’m kind of speaking for experience here, coming from a not so healthy family myself) that he doesn’t want kids out of fear of fucking them up just like he got fucked up.

with charles i really don’t know, i think he does love kids, and he loves taking care of leo and everything, but … IDK

i need to hear ur thoughts on this because somehow u always capture the ✨lestappen essence✨ perfectly

(also im not asking this with a fic expection or anything, i think that IF they ever were to get a kid, it’d probably be years after both of their retirement so they can both really focus on them, so its purely a ques out of interest)

Ah yeah I'm not ready for a kid fic tbh, don't really plan on writing one any time soon, buuut I think Max really really wants kids, although he's very hesitant because of how he was brought up and he doesn't want to fuck them up, but I think that would obviously make him an even better dad. I think he's actually thought about it so much that he's planned it all out for in a few years' time, but he hasn't had the serious conversation with Charles because he's still scared about it

I think Charles would be at that stage where he knows he wants specifically three kids someday but he insists no he isn't thinking of kids in the near future, he's not dad material yet, and then as soon as he sees a child he gets the worst baby fever you've ever seen and he's begging Max to take one home and Max has to be like no, schat, you can't sneak it into your luggage, that's kidnapping

And they would definitely both be the best dads spoiling their kids to the point that they would have to take turns being 'bad cop' telling the other one and the kid no they can't go to Disney Land again that's the third time this month and also eat the fricking vegetables

[dovetalez]

rewatching 1899 because I sold my soul to Bo and Jantje and im on ep.3 around 56:38

Daniel points out the fog and how it’s “almost like someone sent it here to stop that madman” (paraphrasing) and the way Maura defends him 😭. I can’t help but feel bag for Daniel. I love him but Eyk and Maura are my beloveds they’re my otp I cannot help it.

Anyways I think it’s really interesting how the conversation plays out ESPECIALLY after the scene with Ángel and Ramiro; again paraphrasing because I don’t have much time to find the exact quotes, but Ángel says something along the lines of “you can’t change the nature of things, I will always be who I am and you will always be who you are” and thinking abt the true husband/key eyk theory makes me want to implode. Maura is constantly choosing Eyk, she does in the beginning by opening up to him the way she does, (I’m sure there are faults in my statements but like I said they’re my otp and I’m just excited to ramble about them) and even though their letters all say trust no one they have this weird invisible pull to each other. Also before I joined tumblr, everytime I rewatched it I would always focus on Sebastian. I think it’s really interesting (I could be looking to much into this of course) that some of the time when Eyk and Maura are interrupted it’s because of Sebastian— and he always kinda has this look or behavior around them. It just makes me think if hypothetically he had seen this happen over and over again, he definitely sees patterns. Again with what Henry says, I don’t need to state the line because we all know it— takes me back to this same statement of “you can’t change the nature of things” god I love the dialogue in this show.

I just think personally, there are a lot of things I know I choose to exaggerate knowing Jantje and Bo write very with the flow of the show— (flashbacks to andreas saying he stopped trying to understand Jantje a long time ago gives me a giggle) but the way Eyk and Maura behave around each other is no coincidence I won’t except any other answers. They love each other.

[kroosluvr]

hi!! as a fellow royal trio-truther ive been ADORING and loving your posts so much <3 you mentioned that you've like mentally re-wired shusumi so i was curious if you had a list of head-canons for how they develop in the game/post-game!! Im super curious to hear (: also any head-canons for the akesumi dynamic would be great bc I hate how little the game developed them together !!!

OMGGGGGGGGG HAYYYYYYYYYY ok so. first. look at this (idr if i posted this here already but if i did look again heh..)

ok now ill actually talk under the cut

note that some of this is headcanon territory bc i just be frolicking at this point

some backstory i fell in love w sumi as soon as her art was revealed i was like omfg peak design PEAKKKKKK i love her so much so i was really excited abt her but i feel like there were so many loose ends w her confidant and namely her crush on protag sometimes doing her a disservice (it turned ppl off from her (understandable bc i also dislike when writers make a female character out to be dependent on a male character) but also made other ppl weird abt her in the same breath....... shivers. people who overly-romanticize/sexualize mentally ill characters (especially girls/women) freak me out sorry

anyway that put me off frm p5 fandom for a hot minute. BUT regardless. i think people often focus on like "shy cute sadgirl kouhai crush-on-protag" for her which on top of atlus's.......mediocre handling of her also does her character a disservice... shes so multilayered!! she houses such insane convoluted levels of distress and fear and anger and reluctance and most of all STUBBORNNESS. i think her headstrong personality is not really emphasized in fandom but i can totally see it (maybe its just me but).

ok moving on to my shsm delusions i think to turn sumire's canon crush on its head i want to make them doomed to never get together. i think 3rd semester is so tense and high-emotion that royal trio are so deeply intertwined w each other:

like they all are mildly-to-a-lot suicidal so they hold onto each other so tightly to make sure none of them spirals and does anything bad. i think in the end they just want the other two to be Okay, even if they themself doesn't. if the other two are ok, then it's all good.

ok back to shsm LMAO i think seeing their relationship as like an odd high-emotion situation makes sense. they love each other, obviously, and provide each other comfort, but the idea of a relationship slips thru their fingers like water. is that right...? is that how it is? like i said up there they just crumble under the weight of their own love. tldr theyre in no place to "date" each other........ but they have their "almost." they're inseparable, they love spending time with each other, but knowing in the back of their heads that it won't last, and they'll have to leave it be one day. "sometimes when i really love someone i leave them alone forever." peak shsm to me. "let's run away together - but what if it's not enough? what if all of this fear and sadness still stays? i take a man down to the river and he throws away his sadness but hes still left with his hands, he's still left with the river (paraphrased richard siken). peak shsm to me. i think they try to treat eachother so softly and gently that it fucks it all up, actually. peak shsm to me. it's not codependency in the sense that theyre not trying to save each other - they're just trying to salvage out some love from it all. all of these terrible things that happened: there's still love, right? there's still love. but the pain can't all be sifted out, and everything still hurts. but they still love. (they just don't date or even talk to each other much after graduating and i think they talk to akechi but to each other its suddenly COMPLICATED. i hate these guys)

ironically i think if you throw akechi in the mix it stabilizes out and i think shuakesumi could totally have a happy married ending. but shsm as a pair i dont see endgame for them. peak for me is that theyre in love and then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget each other (they don't)

(If this sounds ridiculous and stupid im sorry. i just like shoving too-many-emotions onto my favs sometimes (a lot of the time))

IN REGARDS TO AKESUMI i think my latest 2 comics describe how i feel abt them pretty well!!! link 1 and link 2. actually i think akesumi's friendship is a great way for me to explore how i see/portray/feel about sumire, because i see them as way more similar than the game pays attention to. they're both stuck in their ways: sumire in her cowardice, hiding from the incident and refusing to move on, and akechi entrenched in his own traumas and feeling like he doesn't deserve more than that. their self-hatred manifests in two opposite ways but its very similar at the core. they both like. have no fucking clue what they're doing in terms of handling their pasts so that's why i think them working together to get around their own respective traumas is so fascinating: akechi is terrible at it, pushing sumire too far, but at the same time that perspective is something that she needs. meanwhile, her sensitive and observant personality shows akechi that like, you can have This too: a soft, good love. to have someone care about you unconditionally, so gently. you deserve that, too. yeah i can explode my head off now

i did not proofread this.

[penelopepitstopp]

hi sorry to bother you and you don't have to answer if you don't want to but I was curious as I've heard some stuff about the reasons ed stopped doing his double act with ray peacock but you seem like you'd know more so I was just wondering if you could elaborate what happened?

again feel free to ignore im just quite new to off menu and only really know james's past stuff xx

I've had a few questions like this from people and sorry I've never answered them before but I was never quite sure what to say to be honest.

It's obviously quite sensitive for both sides and is not something I feel like I should comment on as they both kept what happened mostly private.

However, I do understand I probably know more than most thanks to being introduced to their podcast at a stupidly young age (thank you older foster brother) and keeping up with Ed’s career, and thought that perhaps me saying what I know to be true will be better than people speculating.

I do have my own personal opinions on some things but I'll leave them out of this and keep it to just what they have said or done publicly so it's purely objective, and be as respectful as I can (also I have not kept up with Ian's career so most of the more recent stuff is second hand from people who have)

(Oh, also I will refer to Ray as Ian as that is his actual name and he chooses to no longer go by Ray)

So, okay, this is what's out there:

- First a bit of background: Ian is quite a bit older than Ed (13 years) but met Ed when he was at university as he did a show there. Ian said he liked Ed because he was by far the most polite boy who came up to him. He later offered Ed a job as a director for his Edinburgh show.

- Ed continued to help Ian out during uni and after he left, Ian would occasionally get him gigs.

- When Ian started the The Ray Peacock podcast with Raji James, Ed was initially a guest but pretty soon became another host. He was still only 21 at the time. The podcast later went on to become The Peacock and Gamble podcast which was massively successful for the time.

- Ed was still living with his mum at the time but seemed to also spend a lot of days/nights at Ian's too. They were clearly extremely close.

- The podcast naturally lead on to them becoming a double act which they toured and took to Edinburgh. They tried to get some telly shows commissioned but none of them got the green light. They kept mainly to live shows, radio, and occasional guest spots on telly.

- During their time doing the podcast, Ian was diagnosed with depression (he would talk about this openly sometimes and has since done a mental health podcast)

- Ed never talked about anything like that at the time but has since talked about struggling with managing his type 1 and body image issues after he lost weight, so I don't think it would be unfair to say they both probably weren't at their best mentally around this time.

- An incident happened during their time on Fubar radio where Ed felt slighted by the station bosses (I believe they were not paying him judging by what he said to John Robins) and he decided he didn't want to work for them. Ian liked the steady gig so continued on as a solo show.

- Ed started to get a lot more solo gigs and telly work, along with many others of his generation of comics. Touring with Greg also helped him massively.

- Ian has admitted he went a bit crazy on twitter for a while. During one of Ed's early solo Edinburgh runs, Ed did a promotional interview. He didn't mention Ian and this caused Ian to send a number of very passive aggressive tweets to him which Ed didn't engage with. All tweets were later deleted.

- Ed tweeted at a slightly later date something that was not directly at Ian but was assumed to be. I will be paraphrasing a lot here but it was basically something like "Your life hasn't gone the way you wanted. I'm sorry. But don't use that as an excuse to ruin my night." Rob Beckett also got involved, again not mentioning anyone directly, but appearing to stand up for Ed.

- All of their old podcast episodes were later no longer available on official sources.

- Ian did a Q&A on his podcast after he and Ed has split up and was asked if they were still friends. He said they didn't speak anymore. He did also however, cut ties with almost everyone in comedy.

- Another time Ian confirmed he was the one who stopped talking to Ed. He did not elaborate as to why.

- However in more recent years they have at least had some communication. Ian did a retrospective on the Ray Peacock podcast and it pushed him to call Ed. I did not hear this myself but have heard from others it was quite sweet.

- Ed has mentioned Ian by name a few times on various podcasts and always seems to have no ill will. He has said he is grateful and was very lucky to be given the opportunity by him. He also said he wouldn't be where he is today were it not for people like Ian and Greg Davies taking a chance on him.

- After the tragic death of the comedian Gareth Richards last year, Ian tweeted that he and Ed had spoken and agreed to re-release the interview they did with him for the podcast. As far as I'm aware that's the most recent occurrence of them mentioning each other.

And yeah, that's pretty much all I think. And while I won't say any more on the matter, I will say that their podcast was a massive part of my childhood and they both provided me with so many hours of laughter. So wherever they are with each other now (and I hope that they are broadly fine), their time as a double act was fantastic and meant a lot to a lot of weirdos. And nothing can change that :)

[emleeeeeeeeee]

waiit i just read chap 508 of lookism and gun might actually die. bc logically theres no way this arc is gonna end if gun's alive. and if dg isnt charles' second body and he turns up at the very end, he might actually kill gun. or if ui daniel turns up. also makes sense with like, when ptj said a character thats been there from the very start is gonna die, he also said that the character is gonna have like, a major part in the plot (obviously im paraphrasing here but whatever) and at least for this arc, gun kinda is the plot. and if gun dies, that makes it easier for everyone else to take down charles choi, which i think might be the next arc?? bc ptj did say that lookism is ending this year (i think) so its a pretty good sign.

but i think the problem with this is that gun's potential death hasnt been foreshadowed as much as other deaths that have happened in the series (olly wang) but it might be like a jiho type death where its for shock value.

EDIT:LOOKISM ISNT ENDING THIS YEAR MB GUYS