#im not going to comment I'm not going to do it

[dorliart]

Oooh.

Am I the Asshole for ruining my best friends excitement?

Im going to have to keep this very vague for personal reasons, so throwaway Account naturally.

Okay so for context, I'm originally not from The Isles and have found myself there now. (I know, I know, big deal woah etc. I'm using a vpn, and being safe, don't worry). So I've been living with some people on one of the isles, everyone has been truly very friendly and welcoming despite me not once having told them where I'm from exactly. But I feel like I've made friends and maybe even people I would consider my family. Now here's the problem. Apparently where I am now people have been really pushing the First Flight Ritual. At first it was only sort of vaguely talked about at school, and people have been bringing it up around me a lot since my wings have already fully grown in, a bit early. I had assumed it was a myth or legend or at most something older cousins tell their younger cousins when they want to look cool or intimidate them, but apparently not?? It keeps getting talked about more seriously, and even teachers and educators have started bringing it up.

Well and here's the actual problem. My best friend has been talking about it just as long, having heard about it from their big sibling a lot (which they really miss since they moved, so I get it) but they've been getting more extreme with it. They talk about actually wanting to take part in it as soon as their wings have grown in, even! If they haven't finished growing in! Like what! I thought it was common sense to know how fragile newly ingrown wings are, especially with not having been able to put any muscle strength on them?

I have been trying to reason with them for the better part of two weeks, but they won't listen at all. I've tried to explain it to them, but it was no use. And it's not like they don't know the risks either. They're so smart and they know about biology enough to know that this is not a smart course of action, they just won't admit it!

Things finally came to an all out argument a few days ago, when I all out told them how incredibly stupid this was. They could die!! But they didn't care. Just said I was selfish and was ruining what they were working and excited for, and jealous of their ambition. I'm still furious about it, but after storming off I've done a bit of reflection and while I don't regret what I've said and my stance, I do feel a little bad about having blown up so much.

So, am I the asshole for telling my friend it's stupid to participate in a ritual that is very likely to kill them?

Edit: guys I know it's a sacred ritual and everything but don't y'all think it might be wrong to continue a ritual that is actively killing people??? What is wrong with you

Edit 2: yes I will be deleting comments calling me a traitor and telling me to move down. This is not helping the conversation here.

if you're trying to get into the head of your story's antagonist, try writing an "Am I the Asshole" reddit post from their perspective, explaining their problems and their plans for solving them. Let the voice and logic come through.

[cheriladycl01]

Bags Under our Eyes - Lando Norris x MakeupArtist! Reader

Plot: You work as a makeup artist and hairstylist and end up having to do Lando’s before he goes to the O2

It wasn't like you werent familiar with Lando Norris, you'd actually met him a few times. You were sort of hired, freelance, by McLaren as his stylist for events he went too. You were a makeup-artist primarily but there was a few times where the stylist had cancelled last minute so after that one time they trusted you with it all.

Hair Makeup and Clothes.

You were the pure definition of freelance, you didn't have a set place you worked and just worked purley when work came to you.

You started off, fresh out of sixth form working in the newest Sephora in London. And from there you started to do your own work, wedding makeup, birthday makeup, and just whatever took your fancy.

Then you picked up something last minute for the BBC when they were interviewing Lando. It was pretty last minute and you'd been in France only 12 hours before getting the call but after the last eurostar back to London St Pancreas and no sleep you were with Lando.

Pretty much whenever you saw him you were on lots of caffeine and practically crawling through your day.

But this was the biggest job you think you'd ever had. You were doing Lando's makeup for the F1-75 launch at the o2 and being invited there to watch the whole thing.

You werent reallhy into cars, or racing for that matter and you felt bad accepting the ticket but there was part of you was desperate to see your work up on stage.

But you didny know how it was actually Lando who kept asking Mclaren to ask for you and give you these opportunities as he wanted an excuse to see you!

"Hey!" you smile at the team that was setting up to get both Lando and Oscar ready.

"Hey girl! Are you ready for tonight? Heard there's going to be live music and Jack Whitehall is commentating the whole show!" one of the stylists for Oscar exclaims.

"Y/N!" A voice exclaims and you turn to look at the intrusion to see Lando poking his head round the door Oscar sauntering in next to him, a placid and nonchalant look on his face.

"Long time no see!" you grin at him, showing him into the seat he needed to be sat in. You face him to the mirror away from you with a roll of your eyes as he refused to turn himself around just staring up at you.

"So, excited for tonight?" you as running fingers through his hair to which he closes his eyes.

"Not really, big crowds and events arent really my thing" he offers.

"Mmmmm, well im sure it will be over before you know it" you grin. You start to position his head looking at the curls and the shape they were already and debating if you should wash it.

"When did you last wash you hair" you ask pulling at his curls a little.

"Damn, didn't kow we were like that Y/N" he says and your eyes roll as you face him to the mirror.

"You've used to much gel, were going to have to wash it!" you complain before taking him to the basin to rince and wash his hair. After about half and hour of putting in product and later diffusing to get his natural fluffy curls you send him back to the chair.

Oscar went off with his team to go choose some clothes which left you and Lando alone in the room.

"So, we've known each other for a while when will you let me add you on literally any social media?" he asks looking at you in the mirror trying to catch your eyes that are on your makeup that your placing out next to him.

"Hmmm and why would you want that, I'm just your makeup artist" you chide, coming to the front of him and starting to add a little bit of concealer under the dark circles forming.

"You need more sleep" you say as if it was nothing. Not even glancing at him, just using the brush to cover up his lack off sleep.

"Mmmm been practicing on the sim for the new season. New car and all that" he smiles happy that your noticing these things about him.

"Work life balance is important for an athlete you know!" you tell him as you brush through his eyebrows, pulling tweezer up seeing a few out of place ones.

"Mmmm says you, thats your third coffee! You always tired or is it just on your job?" he laughs and you once again roll your eyes too him.

"Look ill give you my number if the next time im asked to do this," you gesture to his face. "I dont need so much concealer to cover up the bags" you offer and his face lights up in a smile.

"Done! Are you free next week its my cousins, uncles mothers friends neighbours birthday" he grins cheekily and you laugh shaking your head.

"You are impossible Lando" you laugh.

"Mmmmm impossible to resist" he winks and again you laugh. You did find him funny, and handsome, he always made sure you were alright ... what was the issue? You thought to yourself.

Liked by lando and others

y/user: this was by far the best event I’ve done in a while! Thank you so much for @ McLaren for inviting me to the launch and letting me style @ lando for the night!

Tagged 3 People

View all comments

lando: Ah always love seeing my biggest fan :)

-> y/user: since when did Carlos and Zac Brown get here?

-> lando: haha, blocked 🚫

-> y/user: but the clout! Jk jk don’t cancel me

fan1: will never skip a Lando/ Y/N post!

-> y/user: neither will I

->lando: neither will i

fan2: they’re so funny I swear to god!

McLaren: We hope to see you at the MTC soon! 🧡🍊🦁

Oscar Piastri: where did you get those flowers? 🌹

-> y/user: shhh 🤫

Instagram Story Caption:

After a Long Day at the o2 🫶🏼

Taglist:

@littlebitchsposts @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount

[messrsrarchives]

sending you so much love and so many hugs Robyn!! i can’t really contribute to the conversation because i’m cis, but i’m so glad you’re speaking out about how trans people are being treated and, as much as you’ll be missed on tiktok, doing what’s best for your wellbeing. i think i speak for everyone that follows you on here when i say that we’re so, so proud of you 🫶🫶🫶

i've been thinking about this since it came through and im prefacing by saying that when i say "you", i don't necessarily mean You in particular, just the general you.

I MEAN FIRST OF ALL !!! thank you 🫂🫂🫂 so much <333 it truly means so so so much, but this ask is a good opportunity for me to yap here about it so i hope you don't mind <3

because this is 10000% a discussion for cis people to weigh in on!

i mean not necessarily to the same extent. trans people - and those from other communities that jkr has harmed, but i can't speak for those - will be more educated on it, we'll have more to say about the repercussions etc, but the fact this is a very trans-centric discussion is why people are upset.

because yes, we know more but also,,, we're more at risk. see here: deadname leaked. these discussions are ones that we are more adept at having (because we have to have them daily with people irl) but when those unharmed stand to the side and let us take the reigns, that's where issues arise - that's where the complacency stems from.

because trans rights isn't something for trans people to fight for alone, it's something for Everyone Who Cares to fight for. and in this space, when we're having anti-jkr discussions, if it's just thsoe harmed talking about it? that's where the negative comments i've received come in. the ones calling me dramatic or over the top or making it seem as if this is a Robyn issue rather than a general issue, yk??? because when support isn't widespread and instead concentrated on a few accounts, yes it's going to seem dramatic.

i'm thinking here about when i spoke about how people engage with celebrities (specifically ben barnes) and i got SO many negative comments. i said that the way people engage with them and force the universe on them will result in their engagement, and i got called over the top and told that i was "taking it too far",,,,, and then. three days later. he says he would take part because if he Didn't? it would "be a disservice to the millions of people that have messaged me". yk like,,, Yes. we know more. we spotted that risk before those unharmed did, but we were also ignored because i know that i and other trans creators spoke about the treatment of fancasts last year,,,, and here we are.

we (and by we i mean all communities that jkr has harmed) need Everybody to stand With us. not just nod when we speak, but be unapologetic in it. listen to us. have discussions with us, and have discussions in your own spaces. open yourself up to the prospect that, hey, maybe trans people can point the way because they know more, and then we can participate, yk?

i think one of the now deleted videos spoke about this but i get tagged a lot in comment sections. i get tagged a lot By Creators as a "@/messrsrobyn has a lot of videos about this" and whilst on one hand! that's great! i'm so so so glad to be a source of information. but on the other,,, isn't it sad that rather than having the discussions themselves, it gets handed over to someone harmed by it??? like if the people tagging me had One video about jkr, i'd be less upset. it's the fact that they Don't have ANY information about it, they never speak on it despite having (in some cases) bigger platforms with more influence, yet the reigns just get handed over, so more people come to me, and then when i talk about it again for the new people, i'm over the top and dramatic and i never shut up.

which is where education comes into it:

those harmed will be able to talk about more in depth, absolutely. but those unharmed should also be speaking about it too. it shouldn't be down to those that are harmed both inside and outside of this space to take on that full responsibility, it should be a general discussion. because if only we are fighting for it,,,, our voice is systematically weaker, and it just seems like a Personal issue when really,,, trans or cis, jkr is a threat. and more people should be receptive to acknowledging and discussing that. (again, maybe not as in depth, but it's the constantly watching to see who is safe and who isn't that's tiring)

and there's a lot of factors. i'm not ignorant to that. but i'm also abundantlyyyy aware that this (mainly over on tiktok) has been a very trans-centric fight with a small minority of us speaking about it, when really, the fandom as a whole should stand strong in their anti-jkr stance and should be combating the massiveeee rise of complacency that we're seeing with all of the hype for the reboot.

cis people might not have as much information as us, but that's because they are not harmed directly by her transphobia.

they don't have to watch headlines. they don't have to watch donations. they don't have to see where her money is going. or what her voice is saying.

We Do.

and it sounds theoretical (not to just trauma dump lol sorry) but the Cass Report??? an incredibly transphobic medical report that jkr pushed for and publicly endorsed? that report was SO baseless, full of misinformation and transphobia and it was meant to restrict trans healthcare. instead it's stripped me of All healthcare. i am not on the medical database. i don't Exist in the medical world, despite having many medical issues that need medication lest i literally potentially Drop one day. that's not a hyperbole - i need that medication, and i don't have access to it because of a report she pushed for, and then said she was "proud" of.

it's not theoretical if you're living it, and it's tiring to fight in your own corner when so much more could be done if others did the bare minimum, which is standing with us, not nodding on the sidelines.

and again, this isn't an attack on you specifically anon! you've just given me the opportunity to yap about it here <33 this is a discussion Everybody should be a part of, because when it's just trans people expected to speak on it? deadnames get leaked for being "too dramatic"

when really, all we want, is for people to Proudly Stand With Us.

[chawsthetransfemdino]

As someone who's experienced all 3 of these, lemme add some commenting

The snow isn't horrible. Its definitely on the better end of places to bleed out at bc of the sheer drama that comes with staining the snow red. The only real con is that its cold, so if u dont die ur gonna be miserable

Yea this ones just spot on. I have no comments. Have a gold star

NO GOD NO BATHROOM FLOOR SUCKS TO BLEED OUT ON. ITS SO UNCOMFORTABLE AND HARD AND EVERYTHING STAINS AND IT ISN'T EVEN THAT DRAMATIC LIKE IF U WANT DRAMA DO IT IN THE SNOW OR SOMETHING BC BATHROOM BLEEDING OUT IS MISERABLE. Im sorry op but I'm afraid you have to go move your clip down

top 3 places to bleed out:

1. the snow

2. your lover/best friend/homoerotic comrade’s arms

3. bathroom floor

[doodler16]

I feel super bad because Valentino is a character I really like visually and conceptually but he is such a horrible character.

I love Moths, moths are my favourite insect probably, so a character inspired by moths is already up there for me (I wish Vaggie had a better moth motive tbh) PLUS I love the whole Heart theme he also has going on, I feel like it actually justifies him being red, and the purple makes a really nice analagous color scheeme.

Then there's his POTENTIAL as a villain. Out of all the Vees he is the one who clearly has a more presonal conection to a main character of the cast (Vox and Alastor just have weir beef with eachother, and Velvette has no relation with any of our main cast) and I feel like if he wasn't written like a volatile stupid clown (Cause let's face is in all his scenes he is either super dumb, or super agressive) but more of a suave manipulative person that doesn't inmediatly come across as an abuser but more of a smart manipulator. He could possibly be one of the best antagonists in the show. There are a lot of stuff about him that make me go "Yeah I like this character" but I also feel like I can't say I like him because people will think im a rape apologist, which I'm not. I just like his design and potential, I don't condone his actions at all and obviously Angel doen't deserve to be trapped with him.

It's just the fandom/criticdom is so strict that I feel like the moment you compliment/like Valentino for whatever reason they all jump at you and consider you a rapist by defect. When people don't do this with let's say Alastor, who is ALSO an abuser, yet people never hate on his fans for "Being slave owners" or "having control/powerhungry fantasies" or whatever. I find it very hypocritical and double standarish, if I'm honest.

Yeah, liking Valentino is a double edge sword. If Valentino’s whole personality wasn’t a rapist personified then I’m sure at most or half of the fandom would openly like him. I do see YouTube comments walking on eggshells when it comes to him.

Even I will admit when watching the show with my brain off, Valentino was at least top 5-10 characters I enjoyed. At the end of the day, me personally I don’t care if people like or compliment Valentino. You can obviously like an evil character and still acknowledge they are bad.

Though, there are some people in the standom who are very protective and say very questionable things regarding Valentino which do not help their case. Obviously there are bad actors in the fandom who go way too far.

Valentino is supposed to be a suave manipulator:

💀 But the show doesn’t illustrate that aspect. Season 1 just showed a man-child rapist who complains and beats up his sex slave any chance he gets. He has so much potential. Valentino could’ve been the Slade of the Vees. Getting into the Hazbin Hotel squad’s heads, planting seeds of doubt: especially to Angel Dust. Indirectly cause drama in the hotel, the possibilities are endless.

The difference between Alastor and Valentino is the way they conduct and interact with their slaves. Valentino uses any chance to beat, exploit, rape Angel Dust. Valentino is super aggressive and annoying to deal with. Alastor is also a loser but he has a prim, proper, mysterious reputation to uphold.

Alastor’s interaction with Niffty and Husk are practically nonexistent. When Niffty and Alastor do interact, they are pretty chill so far. Husk and Alastor’s only interaction is in episode 5, where Husk expresses concern about Mimzy to Alastor and brushes Husk off. Alastor teases and mocks Husk similarly to another overlord (wink, wink nudge nudge) does to him. Then Husk exposes Alastor’s ass, causing him to forcibly use the chain and threaten him.

Whether you see Alastor threatening and dragging Husk with chains is abuse is up to you guys. You guys can argue about it. Me personally, I want to wait because Husk, Alastor, and Niffty’s dynamic is so nonexistent that’s hard to put a read on how Alastor treats them especially Husk. The other big difference is that Valentino is rapist and Alastor isn’t.

[kojitheopossum]

Comes at you with potential songs for the playlist

The Dismemberment song - Blue Kid

Your description of the kill makes me think of it, especially the "I've got no angel to keep me in line" he doesn't have human morality that tells him "killing humans bad", it just has the vibes of him marinating an employee to kill later one

Animal - sir chloe

He wants to kill, he wants freedom - idk how the story's gonna continue but the "i tried to love you, but you're not my type"might be fitting

Choke - i don't know how but they found me

Etho doc beef. Don't have much else to comment on look at the lyrics

Tongues & teeth - the crane wives

Yeah yeah of course I'm giving you crane wives I'm mentally ill and gay

Etho pushing away bdubs, he'll ruin him

The Wolf - crane wives

See above

Entropy - awkward marina

A discord fansong? Really? Yes. Listen to the first section. Chose to link the 2014 version cause it's more raw than the new version to me

That's enough for now, hope at least one tickles your fancy

hmmm besides the last one im familiar with all of these. prefacing this by saying i appreciate you taking the time to suggest stuff but like i said im super picky

i agree with what u spoke about when linking the dismemberment song, but the other lyrics feel way too affectionate to just be about the random dude, maybe bdubs tho? ill mull this over

animal: i rlly love this song!!!!!! and i like the comparison to acting nonhuman. but, at least how i interpret it, the singer doesn't have any romantic love for the other ? but I might have to ignore that cause I like the behaving like an animal part

choke: ur gonna have to explain this one more sorry 😭 beef does Not show up OH WAIT IM AN IDIOT YOU MEAN LIKE HATE TOWARDS EACH OTHER ok i cant delete that that was rlly funny. anyways yes that would fit ill mull this one over too

tongues and teeth: lmao i get it ive been a fan of them before watching the life series and saw them in person a few months ago.

anyways. the singer of the song repeatedly warns the other of their behavior but still says theyre fine with them staying if they ignore all that. the singer also seems to have very little to no actual love/affection to their partner. eeltho doesn't want bdubs to stay with him but at the same time he does really care about dubs but I do like the vibes

the wolf: maybeeee maybe maybe I gotta go listen to that one more admittedly

entropy: oh I like this .... I don't think I've heard it before but I respect the mlp song grind. I especially like the part about others trying to make a hero out of him/making him nice/making him make sense. he doesn't obey the unspoken rules of people like the other characters expect. good pick 👍

also sorry this took awhile cause . I wrote this and then forgot about it lmao thank u again tho

[captainkingsley]

i will Not comment on posts with stupid takes about Ashton I will Not,

(proceeds to ramble in my own tags because idk where else to dump this)

[kawareo]

"I knew a guy with wild opinions, i'm going to share them cause they were so insane that they were funny"

A bunch of people who have never met anyone ever, apparently:

Also damn, viral on tumblr.com. Definitely something everyone wants and is useful and is in no way an annoying and kinda shitty thing to happen to you

[andiv3r]

Having to block everyone who has "wincest dni" in their bio not because I ship wincest (because I have come to the conclusion that I actually don't) but because I do think it'd be fun to poke around at the very real weirdness of their relationship that I've noticed in the show so far. And I'm 99% sure that my poking around will get seen as shipping.

[lgbtlunaverse]

I was watching a clip of the nutcracker on youtube and someone complained about the ballerina dancing as clara because "an adult playing a 12 year old is creepy" and guys. I think we need to shut down takes. No more takes until we figure out what's going on.

[residentialsinyomakai]

Fighting this squid rn, he doesn't seem happy

If anyone has McKraken headcanons they wanna share I would NOT be opposed,,,,

[joyflameball]

I want more surface level horror analyses that don't go into unnecessary meta detail about the number of windows there are and instead focus on the emotions and how the horror scares you rather than extensive explanations on what is secretly going on and I'm not fucking kidding

[cdroloisms]

I just came across your post about vagueposting and I think I agree with it, but the situation you most likely wrote it about is hardly a "vagueposting" because you could say who it was about after reading it literally one time and that person got jumped and insulted in the anon ask anyway so discussing it in person could be safer...

I'm reeeally sorry for bring up a past situation, but I don't think it's a good idea to write nasty things about another person and specific details about how they interact with the fandom and their post, say things that will help to easily identify a person and at the same time insult them or say how you think they feel about the characters or the story based on your feelings about their one take that you didn't like and then call it's "vague" because there is no name in the post. I mean, It can lead to bad consequences, it literally did in that situation.

And yes, I do think people have the right to discuss bad takes or takes they don't like, but there's a way to do it without giving away every detail about the post and the person who wrote it so everyone knows who you're talking about, and if you're not good at being vague, just discuss it in a private chat.

this ask is old but i was busy last week, so forgive me for the late response. i was debating answering it at all, but i dont want myself to be misunderstood, so just. to clarify under the cut.

i'll agree with you that the post/situation in question wasn't vagueing. now, i don't know exactly the difference between the number of followers i have and the number of followers that the blogger in question has, and when it comes to the number of active dsmp followers i think both of us have even less of a clue. that being said, both of us frequent much of the same circles, so i think it's fair to say that many of my posts will end up being exposed to a very similar audience to his, and so therefore this response about the situation you're talking about will be just about as clearly traceable to a specific person as the post he made that started the situation in question. just as a general observation.

if i'm understanding your ask correctly, while vagueing a take is fine, the vague shouldn't be clearly identifiable if you're going to speak badly about it or disagree heavily. to which i have to ask what, specifically, is defined as clearly identifiable? i think most takes in this fandom can be pretty easily traced to a person, even if that person is not the only person that believes in that take--just as an example, c!tommy as a butterfly pinned behind glass was a take in response to the c!sam and c!dream stream after techno escaped, and grew to be a pretty prominent theme to the point of a zine being modeled after it, but i can also trace it to a pretty specific tumblr post with a name attached. i also think that that same statement probably isn't true for many fans who maybe joined later on in the fandom. i mean, i'm aware that i'm being pedantic here, i'm aware that the situation in question created conflict specifically due to it being within dreblr and in a space where multiple people would've seen both posts and felt ensuing awkwardness bc they know both people either on a personal or acquaintance level, but i mean the same applied ages ago whenever strategist-interpretation and trauma-interpretation c!dream apologists felt like going at it again on the dash.

in this scenario specifically, what made the situation clearly identifiable was the nature of the take that was being discussed. the main identifying detail was the take that the asker was asked about, imo, and i mean ... yeah i mean. most takes that haven't blown up pretty heavily do end up being tied to one or two people? i mean, staged finale is a take that can be tied to three people who argued in favor of it the most before the rest of dreblr got on board only in late 2021. i simply don't think that a take that maybe only one person has argued for (which, i dont remember the statistics of the take in this situation, so i dont remember how many notes it had or how many people in total may have expressed public agreement towards it, honestly) is exempt from discussion when it is posted in a meta or analysis space as an analytical piece, which i do think applies to this take from what i remember about it and how it was tagged.

and back to the discussion of what's acceptable as far as directly responding versus vagueing, i mean, a lot of the discussion i've had on my blog (abt discourse etiquette in General in meta spaces on dreblr moreso than this specific situation, largely bc i did want to avoid commenting on a situation that 1) i really had no business in and 2) i have reason to be biased about. the main reason why i'm talking abt it now is bc hopefully enough time has passed for feelings to be less fraught and bc i want to make certain thoughts of mine clear, in case they weren't clear enough in my original posts abt dreblr and whatever) revolves around both direct responses and vagueing having their reasons as well as pros and cons, and both will likely continue to exist in analysis spaces and generally i don't think it's productive to really comment on what people can or can't do on their own blogs. in this scenario, i don't think "vagueing about one specific person in a way that may be clearly identifiable to parts of their audience" is uniquely unacceptable? a direct response very clearly would make the person in question identifiable -- outside of how it's kind of impossible to make a post vagueing someone in a way where No One has Any Idea who you might be talking about without making the post like, incoherent inherently, if vagueing (not identifiable) is okay and directly responding (identifiable) is okay, then why is vagueing (identifiable) not okay?

now, i understand that any situation where the person in question might be identifiable, some people may take the open disagreement as permission to harass them. and obviously, harassment sucks. part of the whole point of opening up this conversation on my blog was bc i worry, with the way that a single conflict between dsmp opinions has kind of rippled through dreblr recently and the responses to this "situation," that an environment is being created with too much of a forced global consensus that punishes people for stepping out of the status quo in both opinions and behavior, which is obviously bad for the whole community, and was looking to voice some of that and have a conversation on solutions. and i understand that in this situation, a lot of your problem with the blogger has to do with his general attitude in discussing the take and his statements on the person who made it. now, i think you have every right to find his statements offensive and disagreeable and to unfollow and/or block him. that being said, i am not exactly a PR agent, and i want to reiterate that what people do on their own blogs isn't my business and i don't think it should be my business. or uh, anyone's business, for that matter. i don't think that everyone "in dreblr" is beholden to keeping to a certain person's standard for "acceptable" disagreement and "acceptable" sharing of their own opinions on their own blog as long as they're not inciting harassment, which entails, like, actively encouraging harm to happen yk. i mean, you can think that the blogger was being rude or an asshole and prefer to never see him again, that's fine. that's your prerogative. but i mean, i'm not gonna tell the guy how to interact with the fandom on his own blog, haha.

to be clear, im not telling you what you can or can't do on your own blog either. if you wanna make a post about how his posts contain harmful rhetoric, how he's an idiot, or how he's rude bc you disagree with his public posts on this situation or on the dsmp as a whole, i mean, i'm not gonna handwring over it and tell you that you're not allowed to do that. it's none of my business, and i like to think i'm not that hypocritical. and honestly, i think that in a space where we're talking about analysis, commenting on harmful rhetoric happens often and should happen often when it happens -- literally anyone can make an analysis post that has harmful rhetoric, and sure it's fiction and no one has to answer to the analysis police for making a bad analysis post, but i've also been in this space and seen enough truly mind-boggling amounts of parroting takes about torture that make people sound like CIA psyops to go "well saying that someone's analysis post contains harmful rhetoric is really rude" pfft. again, i'm not saying i'm immune to hypocrisy, but i've certainly malded enough times in public about the shit people have said in this fandom to take issue with that. now, getting a little less into the strictly-analysis side of things, i understand that insults like calling someone an idiot may not sit right with everyone, to which i say. block to your heart's content. but c'mon man i've called people idiots before i'm no saint 😭😅

anyway. i hope this clarified some things, anon. take issue with whatever and whoever you like, honestly, whether that's me, the person that i just not-vagued for the last however many words, etc etc -- again, your prerogative. and i agree, it's a shame the situation devolved into stuff like insults in both bloggers' inboxes when it really didn't have to be like that like. at all.

[deer-with-a-stick]

if netflix makes Luo Ji non-chinese I'm going to throw myself off a fucking cliff

[bitegore]

i'm coming to the conclusion that if every two weeks i go to make a post like 'i miss having friends who were mean to me but who, importantly, i could be mean back to, because the understanding was just that we were mean to each other and there were no hard feelings and also sometimes we'd fight each other physically also for fun without hard feelings, and the minuge the feelings got hard everything fractured into a million pieces because that wasn't how they were supposed to be and it was all good until someone crossed a line' its possible that, like, , i'm not very happy with my current crop of friends.

and furthermore given the way i keep coming at it i think the issue may possibly be 'i think my friends are kind of mean to me but i'm not allowed to be mean back'

which honestly connects way too many dots. but the last thing i want to be about it is, like, sensitive. I just miss getting to play on the same field.

[owlf45]

when it comes to the unfinished fics that haven't been updated in 3 years and had an authors note that said the next chapter was ready and would be out in a week and the author has no other social media that i can find (not naming names but i have like 3 fav fics like this), yes, I'd take the mediocre continuation half bc i wanna know the author is safe and half bc i have reread the entirety of the fic several times and i need to see where it goes as long as it makes sense.

oh i get that. it's always scary when there's no way to check in with the author too.

since my DC binge, i went back to ff.net just to scope around and see if i could find my old favs. luckily i managed to find some of them crossposted to AO3 and follow the authors' new works there, but it was hard going back in time and seeing so many authors i adored who were just... gone. one of my favorite authors, someone who honestly contributed a lot to my writing style regarding mystery and slow-burn thriller, had passed away.

obviously we never met and im not even sure i left comments on their stuff (i was pretty shy about it) but i raved about their stuff for weeks. i still remember it being the highlights of my month years ago. parasocial relationships yes yes yes, but seriously. the joy i get from getting emails after years, or seeing someone move their account and getting to see them interact again... it's not unnoticed!

(also yes, rereading the whole fic after an update is soooooo mecore i love it when i do that and then get re-obsessed all over again. its amazing.)