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#im not fully happy with the background but who cares it looks cute and im sO HAPPY TO DRAW AGAIN HOLY MOLY SHIT
itty-bitty-sunshine · 3 months
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Heard it was international father's day, so of course I had to draw the father & daughter duo of all time
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almayver · 1 month
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hi alma!!!!! i see you often rb phumpeem fics. do you have any personal favorites that you would like to recommend?
HI Anon!!!! OH BOY. Do you know who you sent this ask to? OF COURSE, I have personal favorites, and I'm very, very happy to gush about them, thank you dear anon.
So first I did a mini smut rec a couple of weeks ago (A MONTH AGO?? Time flies, damn) and I stand by all of those so here. All of them are very, very beautiful, and fun and have a lovely grasp on the characters and their relationship (Also if you are not reading Cole's omegaverse fic I urge you to fix that right now. I breathe for that fic)
Also, this has to be obvious by now, but I'm very biased, and I think that @thunder-point @alan-apologist and @therethatstar are gifts of the universe to fill our world with great writing. So yeah.
Muse - Very sweet take of phumpeem after the kiss. Love the imagery and the flow of it. Just really nice.
Around the sun - Different first meeting AU featuring absolutely smitten Phum!
reach for me a bit (this loop is infinite) - HYBRID AU MY BELOVED. Cole rewrote my brain chemistry with this one folks. I keep thinking about them. Its very sweet and lovely, with Peem being very protective and caring!
Now and forever - This one is just a very beautiful introspective look from Phum about his relationship with Peem and the group, and its sweet and a little smutty and just very beautiful and soft.
Tiny moments everyday - I'm fully cheating here because this is a TanFang fic, but you don't understand the emotions this fic made me feel. I'm always here for soulmates AU, people we need more We Are soulmates AUs. And Phumpeem are cute in the background
pretty in blue - GLORIOUS SMUT, courtesy of Alan of course no one is surprised. But also, OH MAN, this one is very sneaky and it's actually POETRY. You are like yay smut and then a line comes that makes you clutch at your chest and process the emotions. Once again its Alan so really we shouldn't be surprised.
I hope it's not the kind of rain that only soaks you for a little while - This one is a soft little hurt/comfort that took my heart. Very soft and sweet and beautiful.
your back beneath the sun, wishing i could write my name on it - Star wrote this “Phum thinks they are FWB” that was very beautiful and also had me cackling
Counting stars - and then @danonenen was inspired by that one to write a “Phum thinks they are FWB” that actually had me very emotional and feeling a lot for my sweet insecure boy.
Wild geese - A very cute short different first meeting AU with some lovely ruminations about love
My dog really digs you - This one is an ongoing multichapter that I'm so invested in! A bit of magic and curses and loneliness. So fun!
hand under my sweatshirt, baby, kiss it better - Star makes you feel like you are in this house party watching two strangers fall in love in real time and you will have the time of your life
in the cracks of light, i dreamed of you - A fic about soulmates. In the most beautiful way possible. This fic has my heart and soul and if you want my thoughts on it I keep leaving my ramblings on the comments. So go read it, weep, leave your own comment and read mine.
i got an appetite (you too, just maybe) - The famous and beloved lap sitting fic. Really really cool exploration about feelings, and desire. Just fun!!!
Not without you - I see this as a tribute to Peem. And its a truly beautiful one. Featuring insecure Phum and the friendship group being lovely as always
Take my self-control - Short fun different first meeting au (Yes i like different first meetings im aware).
When I look at you - A bit of a canon divergent fic about Peem drawing Phum. Very fluffy and fun.
Every day's a memory - This one to me is a classic. Just a collection of drabbles, not all of them phumpeem but all of them very lovely and sweet.
There are SO MANY more, and as always go to the AO3 phumpeem tag and have a look around because oh gods so many good fics! These are just the ones that stuck with me a bit. Also I will say some of the best fics are the ones that are being written here through a weird form of exquisite cadaver through asks and tags (like the hanahaki fic Cole is threatening my sanity with (yes i made the og post but she escalated the situation)). So def check the tag here and try to catch some of those because oh gods they are glorious.
Thanks for giving me the chance to rant about phumpeem fics because i do love to do it!
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tsotc · 2 years
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your and your boyfriend's ocs are all interesting, i'm looking forward to when the carrd is done. amnuai and absinthe are cute together! could you tell me more about anurak and petrichor's dynamic? does amnuai have a "i'm saddled with unnecessary feelings" moment(as you mentioned ce is like edgeworth.)? and i'm curious about udomwit's dynamics with petrichor, estmund, and anurak. how does udomwit handle anurak and jerome's.. differences?
Anurak is actually one of Petrichor's more regular clients and as such their relationship is like "I'm your therapist but by god I want to hit you with a car" and "I want to strangle you for failing to use Lady Halone's name in place of your 'god'". Anurak doesn't live at Façade save for when he's having a psychotic girl moment and the church isn't letting it stay with them for Psychotic Girl Reasons. Petrichor is a very reasonable person but oh my god you're fucking insane what's wrong with you.
I don't think that Amnuai has had that moment purely because Absinthe doesn't have a brain for the most part. Ce is ungodly unaware of cer own emotions but incredibly in tune with other people's, including absinthe, so doesn't find it hard to dance around cer feelings for him in a way that still allows for his affections and cer caring. There's a chance that ce's been like that to Petrichor before (they get along well and are mostly sane and normal, unlike Literally Everyone Else) but it manifested like "Would that I could live in a world without Absinthe. I find it difficult to lay my heart to rest when he's around." "Im going to call you a slur are you okay with that" (SAID JOKINGLY).
UDOMWIT. MY GUMBLY FUCKING MEOW.
Despite being one of the most eccentric people there (minus anurak, who believes halone speaks through him etc. etc) she's fully convinced that she's destined to be a background character in everyone else's stories and acts as theatrical and as memorable as possible to try and cement her place in other people's legacies, if only for a night. She and Petrichor are playing gay chicken in the sense that wit won't allow herself to burden someone like him with her love and petrichor is solving peoples problems to avoid dealing with his own (he and amnuai tend to bond over this). She loves him though and it's clear for everyone to see. Udomwit calls everyone "love" and "dear" but it shows up a lot more with petri than anyone else, she loves through food and asks him to taste test her menus and desserts a lot, the act of sharing a business together is one of love as well.
Wit has known Estmund for a very, very long time. He's actually the one who taught her more refined cooking stuff when she came to Coerthas for the first time (up until then she was mostly just a homecook and that hasn't really changed). This Was A While Ago. 18 summers or so? Udomwit is like 38 and Estmund is like 52 but nobody believes how long they've been friends bc one larps as a vampire and the other Goos His Face everyday with Plant Goop to keep looking 25. Hyur curse. Whenever Estmund comes to visit he brings a sodoku or crossword book and they do it together. The two of them tend to bounce resippies off of each other a lot and its nice when they cook together because everyone goes home with like 3 full plates of food because god these two don't know how to cook small portions when they get excited about food.
She. Does not handle Anurak well. She's bad with conflict because oh she just wants to keep everyone happy and well fed and safe but isn't incapable of putting her foot down when things get dire, even if it really does break her heart a little to do so.
Anurak keeps its head down at the bar unless Jerome is there mostly under threat of Amnuai Is Going To Beat You To Death. They get on rather well, don't get me wrong, but only whilst Anurak is having a normal one and when things stir up with Jerome she isn't usually the first to jump in to stop it. This isn't out of lack of responsibility or anything, just that she's a Little Scary when she's angry or being authorative and Petrichor is better at de-escalation wrt those two. Anurak. is like a cornered animal 9 times out of ten, Udomwit is a calming presence for the most part and let's him get the stress from being Catholic out a little bit when Petrichor isn't around.
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agustsvga · 3 years
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ali abdul & f!reader relationship headcanons;
a/n; best boy ali 🥺! my sincereliest thank you for 104, say whaaa? excuse any errors, feel free to reblog/like, interact and stay safe my dearest friends and readers! p.s.—im thinking of buying a baby yoda as my birthday present, should i do it?
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Who would ever get tired of falling in love with someone like our sweetheart, dearest starlight in green tracksuit, Ali?
His parents being supportive of your relationship, fully understanding love like yours are to be treasured. You were holding back your tears, for fear Ali’s parents wouldn’t accept you as their sons beloved, but all your fears went away when they said they were happy about it, and wished you two a blissful life and a happy future together
Ali was very shy, nervous to make the first move but caved in. One beautiful evening, he held your hand while on a walk together, and his heart was feeling like they were in paradise. After a while, he gestured kisses on your palm and hand, his lips lingering there longer to feel your skin against his lips, which he calls heaven
Giving you gifts such as little trinkets that reminds him of you, and dates like picnics on the beach or relaxing at home watching movies together, occasionally turning into him teaching you his language and learning about his background and culture, and his life before he moved to Korea. His heart skips every time you ask him more about his life back in his home country, and your interests in learning of his language, traditions, and culture, that was when he knows he’s fallen for you
Spending time together meaning he catches the tiniest thing about you that he was in love with, like your laugh, your smile, everything about you in general—for no reason at all. He guess it was the way you lean closer to him when he’s telling a story, how focus you look when you’re reading anything he finds that peaked your mind, hugging him at random times and whispering in his ears “I love you”, never worrying him about your thoughts on his hand, telling him love was more than what you see of the eye, and you would never let judgement get in the way to love wholeheartedly
You were the one to initiate the first kiss. Ali became a stuttering mess and blood rushed to his face, making them feel hot. Goodness, your lips were so warm and soft…could he ask you for another?
“Do it again please,” He whispered, since it was only the two of you. You kissed him again, and again, and again…
Same goes to him, he was so used to hiding his hand, scared of judgement from others. But then you, his angel and beloved, proved that you still love him the same and that you don’t care about his hand. Since then, before he goes to work and before going to bed, you’d kiss his hand and tell him you love him, and everyday that feeling grows
He isn’t one for late night deep conversation, he believes he wouldn’t be himself when he’s talking. But one sleepless night drove him to do so when he watched you cooed over his baby pictures, saying things like “What a cute baby you were!” and “You look so adorable with your hat and mittens!”, he was smiling to the ears and his heart was almost jumping out of his chest, he asks you, “Sweetheart, do you think one day we can have a family of our own? I can see a little girl or boy with your smile and eyes, my nose and ears. That sounds lovely, doesn’t it?”
“I think that sounds beautiful. For now, we focus on ourselves, build our life carefully, one thing at a time. Then, when the time is right, we can discuss about our tiny bundles of joy together.”
He was on top of the world to have you as his beloved, goodness, you deserve the world!
One night while you were asleep, he pulled you close to his chest, he spoke to you softly, “Thank you for everything, (Y/N). You deserve so much better than I am. A better home, a better life than this small house, and a beloved with a better job than as a factory worker. I’m sorry for not being able to provide much better than this. But I want you to know, that I love you, (Y/N). I…I will do everything if it means you can live a good life, if not to your expectations, I promise I will make you happy. You deserve it, always.” Kissing your head and pulling you even closer. He knew making ends meet were hard for people like him, but for you, he would do it all over again if you asked him to, because when he loves you at the willingness he didn’t even think his heart could, but he would always be eternally grateful for it
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chocominnie · 3 years
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One Last Time 02  —  Pjm. (M)
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⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader
⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst
⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…
⇢ Song : xxxxx
⇢ Previous : 00   01
⇢ Word Count : 
⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!
⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken
⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?
Your eyes shoot open, chest heaving heavily as you let out a blood curdling scream. Not this again. The same dream over and over again each night. It leaves you sleepless. The time on the clock on your nightstand reads 3:04 am. Just only four hours ago is when you fell asleep. But a full night’s sleep hasn’t happened for a year so why would it matter anyways.
Once you catch your breath you unplug your phone from the charger and read some of the notifications. From your window, the night-time critters sing their songs along with the persistant owl that’s somewhere around the apartment complex. You’d only noticed him, the owl, just a few months ago when your cat started meowing with his hoots. 
A missed call from your uncle. 
Immediately you unlock your phone and dial the number. Bringing your index finger to your mouth you gently nip on it waiting for it to answer, The rings are agonizing to you. If something has happened you only wish and pray it wasn’t as bad as you think. He’s the only parental figure left in your life.
‘‘ Princess! Hello I was just calling to speak to you earlier. But I realized you are five hours ahead of me and you had probably went to sleep.’‘
His soothing voice calms your emotions making you let out a tiny breath of air. Thank god.
‘’Hey Charlie.” You sigh. Looking towards your left, you spot Clara purring quietly next to you. You can’t help but to smile while bringing a hand over to rub her head with your thumb.  She’s so small under the shining moonlight from your window.
Her white coat shines brightly amongst her, making you remember the first night you had brought her home. All she did was sleep, and it worried you because you had no prior expierence caring for anything, let alone a small animal. Clara only drank kitten milk and slept back then. Occasionally being awake enough to nip at your fingers whenever you pet or touched her.
Now she’s a bit bigger and walks around the apartment like she owns the place. Quite the little attitude she has, but its too damn cute for you to scold her whenever she does something wrong. 
“ Yes I did fall asleep from after a gathering at someone’s house.’’ You continue on, bringing your knees to your chest after opening the curtain of your window fully.
The moons brightness illuminates the entire room, but not so bright for you to complain though. ‘’ Oh- was it Jimin’s? Tell him I said hell-’’
You bite your lip hard at his name. He doesn’t know and you wont even dare to let him know. Knowing him, your uncle would have a fit and oppose to come back to Seoul to ‘set the record straight.’ to Jimin. That’s the last thing you want to do, cause trouble.
‘‘ It was his brother’s house warming party.” You say, lowering your tone in your voice. You look at the nightstand for a couple of seconds just before opening the top drawer of the wooden, polished piece. Your hands shakily pull out a picture of you two together.
It was taken at  Marne-la-Vallée, France right infront of Cinderella’s castle. That was the day that you and Jimin had to went to Disneyland in Paris, France. You cant help but to think, with the picture in hand, that it was one of the best nights ever. It was also the same night your virginity was taken.
‘‘ Oh.. I know that tone. Are you two arguing at the moment.”
You shrug, “ I mean you could say that.’’
No you cant.
‘‘ Alright alright I won’t talk more of him. Let’s change the subject.” He chuckles deeply into the phone.
‘‘ How’s Europe? Anything new happening on base?”
‘‘ Same old Same old. It’s been what? 2 years since I’ve left Seoul? The food is different over here. They don’t have kimchi pancakes sadly.”
You can only imagine the frowny face he makes at you whenever he doesn’t approve or like something. It always turns out to be funny.
You giggle into the phone shaking your head slightly, “ Of course. You are in Europe Charlie. Where are you getting food from anyway if you are on base?’’
‘‘ I can go off base to a certain mileage when I am off duty. I just have to report back in time. But you do know that you can always come live on base with me...’ He trails off.
Oh boy. Here he goes. He’s always talking about moving you on base with him. Hell, he’s been talking about it since before he had to go to be based in Europe. By then you were twenty years old and old enough to live by yourself. Growing up in Daegu, Korea since you were six, you felt as if Korea was home to you and you definately weren’t ready to leave yet.
Especially, after losing your parents here. Around eight years old, your aunt and mother were on the way to pick up your father from the airport. With your mom and dad also being military and based in Korea with your dad’s bestfriend, your uncle Charlie, your father had been called to take military leave to go and be based in Korea for the National Guard.
On the way back from the airport, a drunk driver had struck the car knocking them off the road and colliding head first into the railing of the bridge. All bodies were reported dead upon collision, including your aunt. Charlie didn’t take the news well at all, and so did you. Only eight years old and still a bit new to a foreign country. It was devistating for you and Charlie. Charlie did what was right and stepped up to be your legal guardian while taking some time off from the military. Till this day, he treats you like his sacred little daughter and you can’t ask for anyone better than him.
 “You are old enough to live on your own and housing is avail-”
You jump at his voice on the line again, being too spaced out from the tragic memory. Before he can go on any longer you cut him off. ‘‘ Im fine with the apartment you left me. Im paying the bills on time and taking good care of it.”
‘‘ Alright fine. But that option is always available you hear me? I will always be ready for you to come with me.’’
‘‘ Okay Charlie” You groan.
‘‘ Alright.. sweetie it’s getting late on this side and it’s already 3 am on your side. Get some sleep okay? Don’t you have a model shoot thingy or something? You have those a lot.’‘
‘‘ Yes i actually do in a couple of hours. It’s been a while since I’ve did a shoot. Please eat and sleep well. Don’t injure yourself.’‘
‘‘ I promise. You promise to do the same right?’‘ He says, rustling movements are in the background.
‘‘ Yes I promise. Good night sleep tight..’‘ You smile as you wait for him to finish the rest.
He chuckles one last time on the other end, ‘‘I’ll always love you, goodnight‘’
Beep Beep Beep
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You in a racy light pink lingerie with white duvets and sheets is the concept of your comeback. It’s supposed to symbolize the “Night After’’. Camera’s click and directors yell and praise you in your subtle yet damaging moves and facial expressions. You want.. no need for this comeback to be successful. Not only did your manager schedule this, but she is making sure that they release this same very day.
Nobody in this company’s industry has ever did this before. But you, you are sort of the special one. The special foreigner as they say. It’s not like you don’t like it but you don’t like that they label you as that. Stylists, employee’s hell even anybody who works there treat you as a princess. It’s not bad, but it’s just weird.
‘‘ One last one. Give me a sexy yet innocent look mama.’‘ Elliot, the director says, smiling wide at you.
You slip a finger into your mouth and do a little pout with your lips.
Elliot busts out into a roar of happiness with his hands clapping furiously. ‘‘That’s it mama yes! That’s just what we needed!’‘
Adjusting his microphone earpiece, he turns around to greet and thank everyone, ‘‘ Alright everybody this concludes our shooting! You all worked so hard today. Make it home safe, eat well.’‘
Finally. You sigh out in relief and close your eyes. It’s been a long day. Almost 6 hours of shooting. Three Videos, and five swap outfits for each session of shooting for the ‘’ Night After’’.  As everyone heads out and starts cleaning up you bow your head slightly and thank them.
A stylist brings you a satin robe to cover yourself in. You thank her and put it on just before getting up from the bed and walking towards wardrobe. Once you are done putting on your clothes, your manager leads you straight out the exit. Outside awaits the car that drives you everywhere. Literally everywhere.
‘‘ Tomorrow somebody has put in a special request for you to appear as the main lead girl in their music video. It’s short notice and I told them I would have to bump some things around and notify you. But they are paying us and you good money to be in it.’‘
Money? Sounds like a plan.
‘‘ It’s fine. Who am I shooting for?’‘ You say, fluffing your hair just a little while inspecting yourself in the rear view mirror.
Your makeup is still intact with no ruins and the contacts they had given you suited you very well. A hazel with a slight bit of teal. Suddenly the car moves off into the busy streets of Seoul. You can’t help but to notice every couple that walks along the sidewalks. They seem so happy, glad to be around each other.
On the floor of the car lies your little mini backpack filled with all of your items and belongings. Picking it up, you begin to dig through it looking for some hand lotion to soothe your semi-dry hands. Once you find it you gently start to squeeze the tube.
‘‘ Kim Namjoon.’‘
You freeze. Namjoon? The same Namjoon from the group? Joonie? It’s been well… a year since you’ve seen him in person. Hell since you’ve seen all of Bangtan Sonyeondan together. Except for lastnight when Hoseok and.. that guy showed up.
You sigh already knowing the answer from the question you are about to ask.
‘‘ From…?’‘ You ask then put the lotion back in your bag. Slowly you rub your hands together to moisturize.
Your manager quickly flips through the daily planner, ‘‘ Bangtan Sonyeodan but this is for one of his mixtape songs.’‘
Thank goodness.
‘‘ That’s fine. What time will the car be arriving tomorrow?’‘
‘‘ 8 am on the dot. You need to be there by 8:30. I’ll be tending to one of my other models tomorrow so you will be alone. I can send som-’‘
‘‘ No no it’s truly okay. I know how to manage things myself. Besides, I learn from you.’‘ You reassure her with one of your winning smiles, laying your head on her shoulder.
‘‘ Aigoo what am I going to do with you?’‘
The day ends very well. The movies you’ve been watching have kept you occupied. But not occupied enough for you to keep crying at all the sad parts in the chick flicks. Breakups, someone had died, someone had even just spilled something onto the floor and that was enough to send you into tears.Only because when the main lead boy rushed to help clean it up, it reminded you of Jimin last-night helping Isabel.
‘’What is going on with myself.’’ You blow your nose into a tissue for what seemed like the thousandth time today. Clara lets out one of her meows beside you then goes back to grooming herself.
You place her onto your lap and begin to run your fingers through her fur over and over again. Such a soothing effect to you as you stare into space sulking in your thoughts.
Why is it that you weren’t enough for him? Why is it that every single little thing reminds you of him? You gave him your all and he gave you his but what happened? Where did you go wrong? Cooked, cleaned, satisfied his needs. You guys had even started to plan out what you wanted out of a family. When you wanted a baby and what you would name it. It was fun. The whole relationship was fun. Right until that scandal.
Ding.. Ding.. Ding.. DI-
You unlock your phone immediately to stop that annoying dinging noise. Not surprisingly it’s a text from Jeon Jungkook.
Kookie : Im coming over I’ll be there in exactly 3 minutes.
Kookie: Don’t think about leaving either.
Kookie: Im bringing someone with me.
Kookie: We need to have a serious talk babycheeks.
You roll your eyes at the nickname he’s given you. No matter how many times you tell him you want him to change it, he declines. There’s no point in asking anymore.
Why would he want to talk anyways and who is the person he’s bringing. Eh.. it might just be Ryan they seem to do everything together as a team.
As soon as you step foot out of your bed the sound the door clicking makes your head shoot up. How in the living hell does he know the password to your house? Rage takes over you. That’s something that you hate. When people invade your personal space. In this case, personal home.
‘‘ Jeon fucking Jungkook!’‘ You scream, abruptly stomping your feet all the way to and out your bedroom door. Suddenly you stop at the sight of the two faces staring back at you.
Jungkook’s expression holds a concerned yet upset face while the other just stands there calm and cool. But you on the other hand are way besides that level.
Your eyes must be filled with rage and the expression on your face is no good. How dare he disrespect you like that? Bringing him into your home, knowing the bad blood between you two. Oh, they both have something coming towards them. You begin to walk to them again making each step make the floor shake.
‘‘ Get out. Both of you. One you invade my personal private home..’‘
You grab both boys by their collars, making sure to grip the one on the right’s harder than usual. ‘‘ Two, you fucking invite him over here.’‘ You drag each of them towards the exit. Which is going good until Jungkook rips your hands away from his shirt and takes you over his shoulder.
You’ve had enough of him and his invasive ways. Pounding on his back with your fists, you make sure to scream into his ear. “ Put me the fuck down Jeon Jungko-”
You hiss at the stinging sensation on your ass. Did he just? Jimin stands there awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. You make sure to make eye contact with him and roll your eyes. Something that always had and will piss him off.
‘‘ Hush. I told you all of us needed to have a deep talk about you.’‘
Jungkook plops your frail body onto one side of the couch in which he sits next to you. He motions for Jimin to come sit across from the both of you but you aren’t having it.
‘‘ Don’t you do it.” You glare at him. Jungkook sighs harshly only to pluck your forehead two times. You whine and rub it with your index and middle finger.
Jungkook shakes his head in disapproval, ‘‘ When are you ever going to learn? Jimin sit down now.”
‘‘ Truthfully.. I feel as though I shouldn’t be here so-”
“ Good. Get out you are unwanted.” You snap back causing him to give you one of his long stares with no facial expression at all.
Jungkook glares at you just before getting up to throw his hands in the air full of disappointment. “ Enough! “
Yelling. Something else you don’t like to hear being done at yourself. You finally sit still and quite avoiding any eye contact with the both of them.
He sits back down and clears his throat. Jungkook gives Jimin a look before continuing on.
‘‘ I gathered us here to talk about you..”
‘‘ Why. Im fine. How many times do I have to say it. Im fine im fine im fine im fucking fine!’‘ You exclaim, getting more mad by the second. When will people accept this?
‘‘ Baby.. ’‘
Your eyes shoot up to him and his soft voice. You didn’t want to but you did because his voice to you is like candy that melts into your mouth.
‘‘ Don’t call me that. You have a girlfriend at-least be loyal to her rather than what you did to me.’‘
‘‘ Fuck is anybody going to just sit here and listen? Can we at-least get to the source of the problem? Huh?’‘ Jungkook leans back into the couch clearly pissed by your attitude.
Jimin’s the first to speak and holds a firm eye contact with you, almost daring you to break away from it.
‘‘ Fine. Im just going to cut straight to it then. Why are you so jealous? You aren’t okay at all. I seen the way you looked at us yesterday. You wanted to break down so bad but you didn’t. It looks like you’ve been dropping weight day by day why aren’t you eating well?’’
You’re taken a-back by his jealous comment. Although you are you just cannot admit it. You are jealous. You do want him back. You cant bear to see him with another girl but you. But the fact that Jimin is concerned makes you really hope. Just hope that there is something left of you still in his heart.
‘‘ Jealous? Jealous tuh.” You scoff, leaning into Jungkook’s arms where you rest his head on your chest. You only do this just to see Jimin’s reaction and by the look on his face he doesn’t enjoy that move one bit.
‘‘ Yes jealous. I mean why else would you put almond extra-
‘‘ Woah. No need to go there. We established that it was a so called accident lastnight.” Jungkook does finger quotes into the air and looks down at you.
You lift your head up and furrow your eyebrows in annoyance, “ So called? So you really believe that I did it on purpose. Wow Jungkook. Escort yourself out.’’
He sighs, wrapping his arms around you securly in hopes of you settling down a  little, “ Honestly it’s not like that. I wasn’t there to see you bake them nor was I watching her eat it. Im just saying that you knew Jimin was coming and obviously his girlfriend was going to come too. It’s a little sketchy is all.”
There’s no fixing what he said. Him adding onto his explanation just made things sound worse than what he’s trying to say. You don’t have time to be ganged up on, nor like it at all. It’s best if they both just leave, to not turn nothing into something.
‘‘ Get out. Now. Before I call and tell Ryan what you said and then she’ll definitely deal with you.’‘ You say, removing yourself from off of him and onto the other side of the couch with your legs crossed.
Mad isn’t even the word to describe yourself right now. You’re just a mixture of all emotions.
Jungkook now looks of sorriness written all over his face. You bite your lip and shake your head while pointing towards the door. He sighs heavily and takes one last look at you while removing himself from the couch. You watch him slip on his coat and shoes.
Jimin gets up from his spot on the couch, ‘‘ I’ll be leav-”
‘‘ Sit down we aren’t done talking.” 
He looks at you with his eyebrows furrowed, sitting back down slowly.
Jungkook keeps his head down as he wraps his blue scarf around his neck. Poor baby, but he shouldn’t of said it. “Please better yourself and talk it out with each-other. Im leaving.”
‘‘ Make it home safely.. Kookie.” You sigh once the door closes behind him. Now you’re here. Face to face with Park Jimin.
The same Jimin who cheated on you. The same Jimin you haven’t seen in a while. You take a few moments to take in his appearance. He seems to have re-gained his muscles that are peaking through his black, longsleeve shirt. His thighs are still thick, just like his luscious lips. Of course he changed his hair color to black. But who knows, he might change it again.
‘‘ You’ve been doing well?’‘ You say, voice low but enough for him to hear. You drop your eyes to your lap instead of keeping intact with his.
‘‘ Yes. But you have not. Im disappointed in you. Why are you doing this to yourself? Don’t do this because of me.”
‘‘ Jimin you don’t know the feeling. You don’t know how it feels to be left wondering why you weren’t good enough for someone. Why they had cheated on you. You don’t understand at all and wont ever.’‘ Your voice cracks on the last sentence and you an feel the lump in your throat become sore.
He bites his lip unsure of what to say next. Those words had hit him good inside. ‘‘ Im sorry. I truly am. But you know the reason why we had to end it. I fucked up bad and the media was making the scandal bigger and messier day by day. It was better to just call it off.’‘
One by one your tears start to drop. You nose begins it’s running trip but you sniffle it back up.
‘‘ You could of denied it. You know you could of made a statement and denied it. But you felt something for her didn’t you? Didn’t you?’‘ You semi-yell, sobs already starting to take it’s way over.
He bites his lip once again and ruffles his fingers through his hair, “ Baby..’’
You wipe your tears with your hands making your face even more puffy from the crying. “ I am jealous. I am I admit it Jimin. But do you know i have been suffering for one year and two months? I can’t sleep at night because im so used to your touch at night. I look at every couple in Seoul and think to myself, Dang they seem so happy. What’s their secret?’’
Jimin sits up, making eye contact with you with tears welling up into his eyes. It hurt’s you more than yourself to see him crying. It always has.
‘‘ Please don’t do that. Don’t do this to yourself. Please get help from someone to try and move on. Please. I don’t like to see or hear you make yourself suffer.’ He begs, getting up from his seat and coming towards you.
Jimin sits next to you, hesitantly opening his arms up to you. Would it be wrong to embrace him? He’s being too sincere, but thats what you want right? You decide to just do it, and lean into him only for him to pull you in closer into his chest.You just lay there crying and sobbing while he runs his fingers through your hair. You shouldn’t be doing this. He has a girlfriend. But it feels so right.
‘‘ What does she have that I don’t? Why couldn’t you love me the same way you love her “  You cry into his chest, soaking his shirt with your tears. 
You’d been waiting for this moment to just let it out. Let everything out.
‘’ Please don’t make this harder than what it is right now. Just try and forget me and move on. Please.” Hypocritcal. How does he expect you to get over him when he’s the one whos holding you so tight right now. Soon enough his sniffles join yours in harmony.
You raise your head up and look him deep into the eyes while you wipe away his tears, “ Don’t cry Jimin. I’m the one supposed to be crying over you. Don’t cry.’’
He takes your hand away from his face and wraps his fist ontop of yours, “Please promise me you will move on okay?’’
You shake your head no, “ I can’t make that promise.”
He doesn’t say anything. He gently cradles you in his arms and lifts you up. You don’t think to where he is going. You just close your eyes and grab onto his shirt firmly not wanting to let go.
Soon enough you feel the cold sheets over your bed. He covers you in the duvet and leans down to your forehead.  A kiss. Your fist is still locked onto his shirt in which he tries to pry it away but you don’t want to let him go. He sighs and raises his arms up as he takes off the shirt revealing an extra plain white wife beater under it. Taking your other hand, he wraps your hand into another fist onto the shirt to where both of your hands are holding onto it.
‘‘ Please better yourself for me baby. Sleep and eat well. “
Is all he says before turning off the lights and walking out your bedroom door.  You can hear him putting on and zipping up his heavy coat but you just don’t make a sound.
The apartment door clicks and beeps letting you know he’s already gone.
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keilemlucent · 4 years
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best nest: headcanon special
best nest headcanon for salem’s ver of rut season hawks? say no more my dudes (nsfw at the end)
physical changes:
there’s a bunch of these in the fic so lets get into it fellas
so in general, from the brief articles i researched, birds can go through some physical changes during a mating season for like a number of reasons but also realism be damned it was fun
i hc hawks as having weird nails, rut-season or not. normally, they’re darker at the cuticle and grow a bit faster than normal. rut-season? they grow very fast, fully-blackened, curl a bit. he can cut and file them, but it’s sorta fruitless as they grow quickly and are a bit thicker and thereby harder to deal with
eyes? keigo’s pupil shape is always a little off, but during rut-season, they’re nearly fully slit shapes.
wings!! plenty of bird species have changes in their plumage come mating season. typically brighter colors and pattern changes. keigo’s don’t change from their crimson, just have patterns made by small, thin, nearly clear filaments. it gives them a lil iridescent effects. the patterns are symmetrical between the wings and probably add contrast that might change the shadow/highlights of the feathers?? maybe creating an illusion of his already huge wings looking bigger?? this is me spit balling
in addition, they are very sensitive. in general, keigo is just oversensitive as fuck. especially if he hasn’t n*tted in the past hour or so. dude gets pent up fast.
alright now to whaat everyone wants to talk about
keigo’s fat cock
dude just needs to breed! dicks gotta impress potential mates and damn does it. a lil thicker, a lil longer, nasty huge balls. immaculate as y/n said
i haven’t even mentioned pheromones, but the dude is reeking of them whether he wants to or not. they probably don’t have a wide range of feelings and urges they can induce. prolly like horny & safe. but like hey isn’t that what we all want??
the fangs are just because of the cute edits like?? have u seen them? adorable. 
there’s no biological reason its just What I Wanted
emotional changes
this has got to vary whether kei has a ‘mate’ or not
in the case he doesn’t already have an established mate, the dude is just horny. balls to the wall wants to fuck everything in sight constantly. secure a mate, get them in nest, fuck until babies. easy
oooo but with an established mate?? there’s emotion rapport there. 
keigo isn’t a complete bird so there’s human dimensions to his rut- an established mate with like a background would elicit more of these feeling
basically like, protective!! gotta keep them safe and happy because they need to Have my Children but also bc love you know??
i imagine there might be some cognitive dissonance between like instinct and emotions here, especially in moments where its been an hour or two since y’all banged
besides the point, kei’s is gonna be an aftercare king once he gets some of his need to rail you outta the way. mostly because you’d be undoubtedly wrecked and if he wants to not have be pulp and nut by the end of his rut, he has to try and take care of u as he can
in the fic when i said he ‘handles the details’, i imagine this would be stocking up on easy to prepare food, medicine and like topical aids. just to help u out!!!
the chirps
the chirps
if we’re going full bird, we’re going full bird
lowkey it just sounds cute, kei letting go a little and falling into his more instinctual patterns and he just lets lose some bird sounds
over the course of the rut, you probably end up figuring out what certain tones and vocalizations mean
happy chirps, sad chirps, needy chirps, lil comfort coos, things like that
the nest
im a cancer and a homebody so this part is ~*self indulgent*~ 
basically, protective of his mate right?? gotta keep them safe 😤
most surfaces in the home are padded with some sort of blanket or sheet
literally i can see keigo dropping an insane amount of money on just nesting supplies, sleeping with them and scenting them before situating them just right all around
this is probably a long process bc it has to be perfect before he ruins it with u that’s part of the fun
in the fic, there’s a bed against wall windows which is just a nod at the central part of the nest being a spot where keigo can get a good, high vantage point to see any potential threats 
idk if keigo’s like “damn better fuck them near a window so i can scare of competitors” or “if we’re this high up i can always see if someones coming at us” 
whatever the case it’s definitely more instinct avian brain 
in the end, the whole nest is scattered with his softest feathers, his smell and pheromones. perfect. chefs kiss.
and lastly u gotta except the nest!! 
keigo’s put days into making it just for u two, and you gotta basically like, claim it and him 
once u do, it’s fucking time my dude
horny shit (nsfw) (warning: somnophilia) 
im practicing getting filthy on this account bare with me
in classic rut fashion, he is going to rail you until he’s sated and instinctual somewhat confident you’re pregnant. that’s the core of the whole rut right??
i’ve hc’ed him as having some agency during despite his need to stuff you with nut, but im truthfully not sure how much agency. 
point blank he’s gonna wreck you!!
face-down, ass-up preferred. feelings primal and nasty. 
he likes marking you up too oooo boy. you’re the only person who’s gonna see him for the next few weeks but he’ll  be damned if you’re not covered in scratches, bite marks and hickeys in your most sensitive spots
makes kei coo with pride, seeing you all fucked up and claimed by him. especially if you’re sleeping next to him, fucked out and safe in his arms. all the parts of his brain are sated and that’s probably the only time he can get proper rest
lowkey there’s probably a fair amount of cock warming involved, just ambiently. keigo wants you close, safe and filled with cum and what better way to assure this state other than keeping his nearly perma-hardened cock deep in your cunt for hours on end
he’s nice enough to grind up into you every once in awhile, help you come even in your sleep to keep you comfy and holding his cock just right in your cunt
ugh the existential peace kei must feel when he’s balls deep in his mate while in their nest..... ugh. wow. fucked out dream <333
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bee-cried · 4 years
Text
SoRRY I JUST WANNA FANGIRL ABOUT THE BLUES REAL QUICK
This ship is my HEART
I love them so much omg. I just wanna talk about them in the mth universe real quick okay? Okay.
I love how SBJ wrote Boomer.
I SINCERELY LOVE THE WAY SHE WROTE HIM.
Oh god. Im going back to my early 2012 days when i was obsessed with fanimations of the Powerpuff girls and i would legit sit around and watch hours of the same animated stuff (im looking at you rrb x ppnkg Katy Perry ET fan music video)
But because we were all pretty young at the time and not really that creatively original, we all sort of just made Boomer some innocent, soft boy in the fanfics who instantly fell for Bubbles and they would just be a couple.
BUT GAH DAMN DID SBJ SUBVERT MY EXPECTATIONS.
Being a kiddo at the time, and assuming that only people around my age were writing ppg fanfics, I was like "TCH, why is everyone on Deviant art obsessing over this More Than Human cRAp. I caN wRiTE a BeTTeR fAnFIc."
But then I read it.
And it was more than grammar/spelling errorless, unlike most fics I read.
the characters had DIMENSION.
I didn't expect to see
Blossom as a dancer
Butch into Blossom (i was a big cry baby over color crack ships, but her fic became the exception.)
Brick being mature and scary
BOOMER AS A GOOFBALL
AND BUBBLES LITERALLY DENYING HIM OF HIS AFFECTION
Talk about a full 180.
And I know, I KNOW THAT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A BIG DEAL. BUT OMG WHEN I TELL YOU THEIR EARLY INTERACTIONS ARE SO FUCKIN-
AHHHHHHHHH
Its the way Boomer tries to pin her for me.
It's the way he's literally obsessed for me.
It's the Bubbles seeing right through him for me.
IT'S THE "MR. STEAL YO GIRL" ATTITUDE FOR ME.
Boomer has literally worked so MOTHA FUKN hard to get this ONE GIRL'S ATTENTION who , as Brick clearly puts it, "IS THE ENEMY"
And he falls for her over a Mariah Carey song. HE KNEW IF YOU COULD SING LIKE MIMI... BITCH THERE IS NO COMPETITION.
Omg i feel bad for Hailey.
Oh yeah and, he and Hailey... Bruh. This guy gets his ex to agree to play an Avril song with him just so he can serenade BUBBLES.
THAT IS SO
Boomer. Omg that is so Boomer cause it's like his thought process>> "I know we broke up, but your guitar skills are awesome and I really need you blessing.... Yes by your blessings im referring to your guitar playing...Yes this is for another girl"
" ...Yes it's for Bubbles... Please don't hate me."
And just the fact that Bubbles is like, "Hun, I don't care if you're up there singing "I will Always Love you" to me. If the name ain't Will, you can gon' 'head and chill. "
But Boomer is so determined.
Everytime he gets the chance to impress her, he doesn't hesitate. He's sung to her in the rain (sort of). He picked up on joining the school musical just to have the slim opportunity of kissing her. Can you imagine him , up at like 1 a.m on a school night watching a bunch of musicals foR BUBBLES.
And their banter is so cute! Bubbles knows Boomer's game and she likes to play it just enough to keep HERSELF entertained. She is fully aware she's tempering with a ROWDYRUFF BOY. She see's his tricks from a mile away.
So they just go back and forth and back and forth because really, even though Boomer says he doesn't take his shenanigans with Bubbles seriously...
This is the only thing he's had to work for. Like legit, everything else he's got was because of a hand out or advantages.
His musical talent: a handout from HIM
His first girlfriend: The advantages of his good looks
JS Inc: An advantage from being Bricks brother and being a rowdyruff boy
No neck joe: His advantage of playing instruments (and because he was a ruff boy)
Him becoming popular: his advantages of, music, rrb background and good looks BOOM
BUT DON'T NONE OF THAT SHIT IMPRESS BUBBLES ENOUGH TO GIVE HIM THE TIME OF DAY 😭
She doesn't care that he's hot, that he's popular, that he can literally play her anything ahe wants, just how she likes it. She doesn't care that he says "he'll be nice" or "play fair" or whatever, or that he's literally so charming, so smooth, he treats her as if she's the only girl to exist in his world. He's tried to amplify that he cares about her by hurting other people- BUT IT'S IN HER NAME.
No. What Bubbles want is simple...
It's commitment.
If he can't be committed to love her (I mean look at how easily he threw Hailey aside), or be there when she needs him, or simply BE COMMITTED TO BEING A GOOD PERSON.
Then she can not date him.
Because she doesn't just want to date a cute guy, she wants to be in love with someone she trusts...
And at first it seems like Boomer just wants to have her as an accessory to his life, and he DOES. The guy literally expects her to drop her relationship with Will just so they can live out his five minute fantasy.
But slowly he realizes, it's more than that magnificent voice. He likes to see her flustered and he doesn't like seeing her upset because of what people say about her. He doesn't want her to be annoyed by him, or to just brush off his advances.
He starts to really want her.
Like REALLY want her, because whatever they've built, that's the only thing he's had to work for in his life, and he loves her for that. He loves her even more when she implies that he is just as important as his brothers and that it's okay to be just a teenager in love. He loves her and his music, she doesn't ask for more from him. She wants him to be happy, and he wants to just be happy with her.
AHH FUCK I CAN TALK FOREVER ABOUT THESE TWO OKAY??
FOREVER
THEY ARE MY OTP
But dear lord, I've been typing for some time
Anyway, YES. I adore their dynamic. Boomer may be more of a douche than he realizes but he's never had to work for anything. He's never really been challenged. Bubbles is his only challenge EVEN WHEN THEY GET TOGETHER, he begins questioning the longevity of what they have because he's reminded that he's not the first and Bubbles has a heart of her own. No matter what he does, because of who she is (not just to him, but in general) he cannot manipulate that. He can not force Bubbles to love him if she falls out of love with him. And that's so world shattering for him because the girl is literally his WORLD. Like no other person could replace her because Bubbles is literally all of who he is. He feels like, if he loses her, what is he? What's his purpose? This is the only thing he's ever built.
Which is really, incredibly sad because he shouldn't think of their relationship like that, but he's so deeply in love with her, for him there really is no other. You could try to hand him "the girl of his dreams" and he'd just... Sort of laugh and turn right to Bubbles because everyone knows, THAT'S the girl of his dreams. It's the only girl he'd want to be with.
A lot of people probably won't believe me if I said I'm also a big boomercup shipper, because their dynamic just works so well.
Okay, i am done FANGIRLING. Thanks for reading my long ass post.
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theonlygamergost · 4 years
Text
Girls and pigs night out - Fd!au
This fanfiction is based on the Family Dynamic au made by @antarctic-bay if you would like to know more, go check them out!!!
Also please bear in mind that the things written in this might not be canon!
This fic was corrected by the lovely @im-default
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Niki has the house to herself this weekend, but her plans get cancelled last minute, so one of the Pandel brothers decides to become the back-up plan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Warning!: Swearing
Enjoy~
“What colour do you-“ “Pink”
Niki was asking Techno the colour he wanted her to paint his nails, but his reply cut her off before she could finish the sentence. She stared at him, blinking a few times.
“That was… quick” she grabbed the pink nail polish, “Ouu~ What if we do pink and black?” she excitedly showed him the two glass bottles next to each other, “Sure” he softly smiled at how happy the girl was.
Niki had the house all to herself this weekend, Eret had left for an update course regarding his job and Tubbo was sleeping over at the Pandel household, leaving her alone.
She had tried to invite someone over, but everyone she asked already had plans, making Niki quite sad.
What made her extremely sad was when Minx agreed to a girls' sleepover but had to cancel it last minute. Techno was with her when she received the text and the poor girl felt avoided.
”I know they don't mean it Techno” she sobbed, holding the tears in, ”But it looks like everyone is avoiding me” dropping the phone on the sofa, she held her head between her hands, her body shaking with each sob.
”There there…” he caressed her back. Techno wasn't one to comfort people, he was usually the one to make them cry, so being on the comforter side wasn't familiar to him.
But be understood the situation Niki was in; Wilbur and the musical friend group weren't available, she had asked classmates only to be rejected with a ��We have an exam to study for, we aren't all like you who gets good votes because we are pretty and sweet talk the professors” which was first of all very rude, and second of all, not true. Techno knew how much Niki studied, they sometimes even studied together. And for a third, she invited Minx, she agreed and then sent her a text saying she couldn't make it, even Techno would feel avoided at this point.
”I know it's not like that but-!” she started crying, Techno could only feel bad for his friend.
But then, a thought arrived.
”What if you still have the sleepover, but instead of being girls only, it's for girls and pigs?” she looked up at him in disbelief, a tear rolled down her face, ”Y-you would do it?” he shrugged, ”It's not like I had anything better to do at home anyway” she smiled and hugged him, catching him off guard, ”Thank you Technoblade” he smiled and hugged the girl back.
So that's how they got in this situation, listening to One Direction songs while Niki painted Techno’s nails, of course all topped by a glitter face mask and some good old gossip.
”Wait wait wait- so you're telling me she stole her friend's money only to gift it back to her, look nice, and hit on her boyfriend?!” Niki stifled a giggle as Techno repeated what she had just told him, ”Yep, Janet had a crush on Adam for a while now, and even if he is taken, with her best friend, she is still trying to hit on him” Techno adjusted the border of his face mask, ”What a bitch” Niki burst out laughing, she had never seen Techno gossip, and the funniest thing was that he knew a lot about his classmates, he just kept quiet about it since he had no one to gossip to.
”If I remember correctly, she also tried to hit on Will” he gave Niki his other hand, shaking the one with fresh polish on around to dry it faster, ”Let's be honest Techno, who hasn’t tried to hit on Will? Every girl in the school has fallen for his charm” they giggled at the fact that yes, that was true, but even if that was a thing, Wilbur was still single.
”Well not all of the girls, you didn't hit on Wilbur” Niki rolled her eyes, ”That’s… correct, but I did fall for his charms, just not in that way, I am his friend after all” Techno nodded, mumbling ”true true” to himself.
”And done! Oh my God Techno you look so good!” Niki closed the nail polishes and admired her work, ” You did an incredible job Niki, oh! oh! Can I paint yours?” Techno asked excitedly, already looking at the drawer with the polishes, ”If I did pink and black you have to get pink and white” she giggled at the sight of Techno in Eret’s borrowed t-shirt, it was too large for him and it made him look like a blob, ”Are you suggesting we get matching nail polish?” she fake-gasped, ”Heck yeah I am” he smiled as he sat back down next to her with the small glass bottles, his nails weren't even fully dry yet here he was, painting Niki’s nails.
After the nails dried out and they took off the face masks, Techno proposed a “Midnight snack” aka strawberry vanilla and chocolate ice cream (of course eaten directly from the box with a big spoon) while bingeing various Netflix series.
After a couple of hours, Niki looked at the boy lying next to her and noticed how soft his pink hair looked, so she reached out to touch it and gasped, slightly scaring Techno, “Oh my god your hair is so soft for being dyed! How do you do it?!” He smirked, “Conditioner and hair mask?” He replied like it was the most normal thing in the world, she gasped again, “You use a hair mask?” She looked at him in shock, his smirk got wider “Once a week”
They ended up talking about their hair care routine and what brands they used for dyed hairs shampoos, while the tv was just background noise, Niki started to gently make small braids in Techno’s hair, “I can’t believe I never noticed how soft and bright your hairs are! I need to try out your brand” Techno’s hair wasn’t that long, but long enough to make multiple braids, decorating his silk smooth hair.
“If you want to try out various brands, do not try the purple-bottle one, it slightly darkens the colour of your hair, especially if it’s a bright colour” Niki nodded making a mental note.
“I have tried a lot of brands before I found mine, but-” Techno’s phone started ringing, interrupting his sentence, Niki kept braiding his hair peacefully.
It was a video call from Phil, Techno was resting his head on a cushion on Niki’s lap so he extended his arms in front of him and answered:
“HELLO TECHNOBLADE, Hi Technomate~” The greet of his two brothers came in at once, the two distinct voices overlapped.
“Helloo~” He greeted back, Phil was sitting at the kitchen counter while Tommy was standing behind him.
“Where are you Techno? You didn’t tell us you were spending the night out” He apologised by moving the phone so Niki was in the shot behind him, “I’m staying at Niki’s tonight, I’m sorry I forgot to text you” Phil nodded and reassured him it was fine, meanwhile, Tommy noticed Niki who kept braiding Techno’s hair.
“Oh my- BWAHAHA!!!” he burst out laughing, “What are you laughing at Tommy?” Everyone got a bit confused, “Look at Techno’s hair!” to that, Phil awed, thinking it was very cute, Tommy laughed once more while Techno blushed.
“Y-your just jealous I look better than you!” He did something he rarely did, stutter in embarrassment, but Tommy got angry at the roast and didn’t realize it.
To get back at him he asked one of his cringy questions:
“Hey, Technoblade! Wh-what are you doing at a girl’s house all alone?!” Techno grinned and brought his phone closer to his mouth so he could whisper the reply, “Girls and pigs night out, bitch”
That phrase went into Wilbur’s quote book.
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linkspooky · 4 years
Note
hey, can you share your thoughts and opinions on dazai osamu's no longer human?(just the book and not in connection with bsd) i read it, i liked it, but i couldnt really relate to it. so im wondering if i should read the setting sun or not. what do you think abt this book?
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I don’t think books really need to be relatable to be impactful, but context can help you understand it. In general my advice is the best way to understand a book is to read more books like it. Always, read more books. 
Sure, I can write a repsonse to the text though. The book, not the anime. (Ignore the picture of Dazai, he’s just there to look cute.)
The biggest and most important idea in No Longer Human (Ningen Shikakku).  The most literal translation of the title being  (人間失格)  "Disqualified From Being Human. I bring this up, because use of the character in the title has specific meaning.
人 (hito) : human, person 人間 (ningen): human Generally speaking, 人 is used for people, while 人間 is used for humans as a taxonomic classification. 
Much like English, the fact that a person is a human is usually a given, because in our world, we call those who are humane “people,” and only humans can be humane. Just like you wouldn’t usually count humans with “three humans” and say “three people” instead, the usual way to count three humans in Japanese would also be 三人 instead of 三人間.  “Human society” is 人間社会, etc.
Or to shorten  人 (hito) : human, person 人間 (ningen): human, biological.
So, there’s an extra nuannce there in the translation. The title of the book uses “ningen” as in the sense of taxonomical classification. So, it’s like saying “disqualified from being considered as a part of the human species.” 
I go this far in my intro because most consider Dazai’s work to be a response to Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment, (he name drops both Dostoevsky and the novel itself). Both of these novels portray society as a whole as an antagonistic force to one individual, who is considered an outsider to that same society. There’s a lot of similarities between the protagonists, both Raksolnikov and Yozo are terminally ill, show signs of mental illness, and both are characters who show incredible self-awareness and moments of self reflection while at the same time being unable to connect to the feelings or identify with the people around them in any healthy way. 
To connect back to my little rant on the translation of the title though, what could disqualify a person from being considered a human being? Well, they could commit a crime for instance. Then they’d be classified as a crimminal. 
Both protagonists of both novels are crimminals in a sense. However, that’s about where the similarities end. NLH is centrally about the main characters egoism. Society matters so little in NLH, society is just something that hangs ominously in the background to the outsider. 
Now there’s another novel by Dostoevsky that similiarly is recorded in a journal format, and is mainly about the main characters Ego.  Notes from Underground is considered to be one of Dos’s first existentialist novels. Existentialism (to oversimplify) in a sense of what does existing in this world mean? 
That’s why I say the central conflict is not with society itself, but rather within the character’s own head. The outsiders of society only exist within their own heads. Their main challenge is not to grapple with society, morality and law like Raskolnikov but rather to figure out what is inside their own heads and what they live for. 
Which is why the protagonists of both novels are terrible egoists. Their main personality trait is their egocentrism, or rather their inability or unwillingness to try to see or understand the feelings or experiences of others. They are first person narrators who only see the world from their own point of view, but they are not objectve narrators. The only thing they can see, the only thing they can relate to, the only thing they can convey is their feelings to the reader. 
F. Scott Fitzgerald writes a similiar novel from a similiar point of view in This Side of Paraidse, which shows the journey of one young man born into a rich family who grows up to not only lose the love of his life, but also to squander all his fortunes at the end of the story. However, Fitzgerald drops all pretense on what the story is about. The chapter titles are things like, the romantic egoist, the egoist considers, narcissus off duty, all the way to the egoist becomes a personage. 
The book ends like this. 
He stretched out his arms to the crystalline, radiant sky.
“I know myself,” he cried, “but that is all.” 
It’s an egoists journey to developing a personality. To way oversimplify again, ego is yourself that exists in your own head, personage is what you show to others. At the end of This Side of Paradise, the main character gains himself, while at the end of NLH the protagonist loses himself. It’s the same journey but in reverse, it’s a net loss, it’s tragic. 
NLH, This Side of Paradise, and Notes from the Underground are all about egoists who are aware of their own feelings, but aren’t aware of the feelings of others. They’re all ridiculously self absorbed individuals. That’s actually, like, the unreliable narrator trick of the novel. 
Yozo is sympathetic yes, he’s an outsider to society, but at the same time Yozo is not the helpless, miserable victim he portrays himself as. He is not the victim to a cruel society, one he comes from a place of privilege and two he becomes a perpetrator. Hence, the whole... crime and punishment allusions. It’s this added complexity to Yozo that’s what makes the book as brilliant as it is. Yozo is someone who is both victim and perpetrator, but he only sees himself as a victim and the story he tells paints him exclusively as a victim. 
But Yozo’s central problem isn’t society its himself. His conflict and greatest obstacle is always his own ego. The reason we read the book biographically, is because we see him grow up, or rather fail to grow up. As a kid he is sympathetic, as an adult he’s a pretty serial user of people. 
Yozo constantly asks for sympathy, but at the same time he’s not really one to sympathize with others. When he tries to commit suicide with a woman, he reports these events with no remorse at all. 
I removed my coat andput it in the same spot.
We entered the water together.
She died. I was saved. 
He seems real broken up about it. 
That’s also a pattern that repeats again and again with Yozo. If you want to see the real nature of Yozo’s character you should see how he treats both women and children. They exist to make him happy, to soothe his misery, and when they don’t he leaves them. 
Like, out of context. What does this sound like. 
What a holy thing uncorrupted virginity is, I thought. 
I had never slept with a virgin, a girl younger than myself. I’d marry her.
The few times we do meet outside characters we see that Yozo is someone referred to as a crimminal, but refers to himself as a victim. 
“Don’t be cheeky now, I for one have never been tied up like a common crimminal the way you have.” 
I was taken aback. Horiki at heart did not treat me like a fully human being.
If you read No Longer Human as a response to Crime and Punishment, you could even read the many women that Yozo falls into flings with and then promptly abandons as a response to Raskolnikov and Sonya. For Yozo, each woman he meets is his Sonya, they are meant to redeem him and bring him peace, and whn they don’t he leaves. Yozo someone missing the point that, Raskolnikov loved Sonya because he sympathized with her circumstances and suffering while Yozo really only ever cares about his own suffering. 
To bring the discussion back to Notes from the Underground. It’s a story divided into two parts, that really doesn’t work without the second part of the story. In the first part, as we are just fed the main character’s thoughts he looks like some kind of revolutionary philosopher. Then in the second we follow the character though a day in his life and he’s just sort of... socially awkward. He’s not some brilliant thinker, he’s just an outsider who can’t connect with others, like Yozo. The second part is necessary to underwrite the first because in the first part of the journal he looks like a champion, and in the second he’s just pathetic. He’s just some guy. Notes from the Underground also has one of my favorite lines in all of fiction. 
"They won't let me ... I can't be good!" I managed to articulate; then I went to the sofa, fell on it face downwards, and sobbed on it for a quarter of an hour in genuine hysterics. She came close to me, put her arms round me and stayed motionless in that position.
The protagonist encounters a young prostitute name Liza, he tries to save her at first, but then turns around and starts to treat her terribly and has a mental breakdown in front of her that ends in this line. She finds him pitiable, and comforts him in that moment. 
However, after this moment of comfort he then he goes back to treating her terribly once more. He yells at her, and she grows tired of him. He pays her and she leaves and that’s the end of that relationship. 
See it’s a moment that’s simultaneously, a moment of human connection, but also it shows how the protagonist regards other people and why he can’t connect to them. If you only use other people to comfort your loneliness, you’re going to end up alone either way. The same way the Narrator uses Liza, Yozo chronically uses women. 
However, at the same time. 
“They won’t let me... I can’t be good.” 
Is what I consider the most striking lines in all of fiction. It is both an avoidance or responsibility, and at the same time an utterance of the baisc human desire to be good. It's always everyone else's fault, the problem is with other people. Yet both Narrator, and Yozo want to be good people, they want to connect with others. 
Yozo and the Narrator are crimminals. They are bad people. (A person who has committed a crime isn’t necessarily a bad person but..) However, being a crimminal does not disqualify you as a human being. They are still people who are suffering. The secondary goal of a novel like Crime and Punishment is to show St. Petersburg as a city where everyone is human, and everyone suffers, good and bad people alike. Yozo and the Narrator are miserable, and there’s humanity in that misery. You don’t have to even connect to their feelings, isn’t it bad to see a person suffering? Doesn’t that elicit an emotional response because nobody wants to see other people suffering and in pain. That’s the basic humanity in these characters. Yozo and Narrator aren’t inhuman. They’re just like... normal people. They are anxious, avoidant. They are terminally insecure. They’re socially awkward. They understand themselves better than other people. Those are all just normal human sentiments shared by everyone, it’s just Yozo and Narrator are so egocentric they act like they’re the only people in the world.
Yet the same, just like the moment Liza sympathized with a man who treated her terribly and only saw her as a prostitute, people still sympathize with miserable people and want to ease the suffering of others. That’s why Dazai writes stories for miserable people.
I am writing a tired story for young readers,
not because I want to be different,
or because I am unconcerned with young readers’ tastes.
I write it rather because I know it will please them.
Young readers are tired and old themselves these days,
and my story can bring them no discomfort and no surprises.
It is a story for those who have lost hope.
                                                                       (Osamu Dazai, Of Women)
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tomorrowsdrama · 4 years
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2020 Year in Thirst Pt. 2
Sometimes, I will watch a drama for the plot/premise/substance and be rewarded with a surprise hottie, and it’s the best feeling ever!  It’s like finding money in your pocket that you didn’t know about.  The following list of dramas can be described as:
Came for the plot, was rewarded with a surprising side of thirst
1. Flower of Evil
Brief Summary: Lee Jun Ki plays Baek Hee Sung and Moon Chae Won plays Cha Ji Won, his wife who is also a detective.  What Ji Won doesn’t know is that her husband, Hee Sung, is actually Hyun Soo, a man on the run from a murder that he did not commit and also a suspected accomplice to a series of murders committed by his father in the past.  Oh yeah, his dad secretly tried to groom him into being his protege/murder partner.  Because of how he was raised, HS believes that he has no emotions and is simply putting on an act as the perfect husband and father.  His “parents” are in on the ruse and are actually the ones who forced him into assuming their comatose son’s identity.  Anyway, of course things from the past start to catch up with HS and his wife is somehow assigned to investigating his old murder case.  She of course feels betrayed, but also conflicted as she discovers her husband is not who he said he was and a prime murder suspect.  Things get even more complicated as the real murderer re-appears with fabulous long hair and tries to frame HS for the murders.  In between all of this are delicious make outs between the couple and at least one instance where they banged so hard, HS was wiped out the next morning.
Surprise Thirst Factor: I checked out this drama fully expecting to drop it because the promos were so misleading and unappealing. But boy was I in for a pleasant surprise!  Not only was the drama super addicting, it also had some nice eye candy in the form of Lee Jun Ki being a completely unrealistic house husband who satisfies in the housework (The man cooks and does the laundry!), childcare, and bedroom and Kim Ji Hoon’s glorious mane of beauty making viewers have a moral crisis over lusting after a homicidal maniac (who turned out to be a real loser without murder daddy around to clean up his mess.  It’s ok, we’ll always have his hair).
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Yes, work that hair honey.  It’s the only good thing you’ve got going on for you (the character, not Kim Ji Hoon)
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The chemistry between Lee Jun Ki and Moon Chae Won was fire and the make out scenes were soo believable.  Like yes, these two beautiful people are really into being married to each other and understandably want to make out all the time. 
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He’s the primary caretaker for their daughter and it’s just *swoons.*  Not all thirst traps come in the form of sexy abs (although I would not mind if he wanted to flash some).
2. Six Flying Dragons
Brief Summary: The story of young Yi Bang Won (who later becomes King Taejong) and the founding of the Joseon Dynasty.  As short as it sounds, that really is an accurate summary of the drama haha.
Surprise Thirst Factor: I started watching this drama because I heard it was a great sageuk and I’m a big fan of Yoo Ah In.  Even though I’m a fan of his acting, Yoo Ah In doesn’t necessarily get my hormones raging so I wasn’t expecting to be so thirsty while watching Six Flying Dragons.  But then.  BUT THEN.  Byun Yo Han showed up in all his scruffy tortured deadly killer glory and my hormones woke up and said hi, hello, who are you, what’s your name, what’s your sign, can I get your number?  The deadlier and more tortured his character got, the sexier he became to me.  Sorry Yoo Ah In, you’ll always be my acting boo, but Byun Yo Han’s got my thirst.  Byun Yo Han looks so good when he's sad and/or covered in blood, it makes me feel like a sadist for thinking that I wouldn’t mind if the drama made his character cry some more.
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3. Ever Night S1
Brief Summary: As a child, Ning Que witnessed his entire household get massacred because of a prophecy that the child of Hades will be born from the house and bring about the Eternal Night.  Somehow, he managed to escape and was the lone survivor.  He finds a baby buried in a pile of dead bodies as he’s fleeing and names her Sang Sang.  The two orphans grow up inseparable from each other and do whatever it takes to survive in the harsh, cruel world.  Ning Que earns money by becoming a deadly mercenary and Sang Sang takes care of the household affairs.  At one point, Ning Que becomes a disciple of the powerful Fu Zi and somehow gets entangled in the struggles between the Holy Sect and Demon Sect.  A bunch of beautiful women fall for Ning Que, and the drama tries its hardest to convince us that he has chemistry with and reciprocates the feelings of one of them (i.e. Mo Shan Shan), but anybody who was even half paying attention knows that the only one for Ning Que is Sang Sang.  They are the OTP of all OTPs and take “ride or die” to a whole other level. Oh also, their height difference is the stuff manga dreams are made of. Ning Que is a “good guy” but also not a “good guy” in the sense that he is not above doing whatever it takes to seek revenge and is only out for himself and Sang Sang (and later, his older brothers and sisters from the academy).
Surprise Thirst Factor: Chen Feiyu is an attractive person but I could not in good conscience thirst after him because he was literally born in the year 2000.  It did not help that he was only 18 when he filmed Ever Night and looked every bit his age.  My thirst may have no shame, but it does have its own set of principles and one of those principles is thou shalt not lust after those born in the new millennium!  Luckily for me, Second Brother is played by Dylan Kuo who is a beautiful, elegant, tall man
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and Brother Chao is exactly the type of rugged and manly that I am into.  
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(you don’t have to be)
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who looks better when wet
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AHEM. Yeah.
Sixth Brother is also not so bad with his scanty pounding work attire,
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4. Novoland: Eagle Flag
Brief Summary:  Asule is the prince of a tribe in the grasslands who is held as a royal guest (i.e. hostage) in the Eastland Empire.  There he meets his two future best friends, Yu Ran, a free spirited princess who is descended from a race of bird people, and Ji Ye, an emo neglected/shunned son of a concubine who is probably the best fighter in the empire.  Ji Ye loves Yu Ran who is a ball of sunshine to his Johnny Raincloud dark emo self.  Yu Ran loves Ji Ye back.  Asule loves both his friends and will do anything to protect them.  The world decides to fuck over best friends Asule, Ji Ye, and Yu Ran for no reason as they try their best to just live a peaceful life away from all the political scheming and fighting.
Surprise Thirst-worthiness: I was completely content with enjoying Eagle Flag purely for its story and substance.  It’s seriously a wonderful, yet heartbreaking drama and the scale of the production is amazing.  No cheap $10 costumes here.  Also, the direction is beautiful/artistic and not the run of mill “let’s shoot it and complete it as fast as we can.”  The two main actors were cute, but not really my type.  Then the drama decided to give Ji Ye the “Sexy Bloody Tormented Killer Makeover” and all of a sudden your girl was rushing to MDL to check Chen Ruo Xuan’s birthday and calculating his age.  I am simple, predictable, and consistent when it comes to my thirst and give a character some scruff, long hair, angst, and some bloodlust and I’m all yours.  I am literally:
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Is it wrong that when Ji Ye showed up looking like this ready to kill his mother’s torturer
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I thought, yes, can we have him kill another? 
5. Run On
Brief Summary: Im Siwan plays Ki Seon Geom, a national track runner from a rich family who is a bit of an oddball and marches to his own beat.  Although his words can sometimes be construed as rude since he has no filter, they are also completely honest and have no hidden meaning.  He also has his own personal code that he lives by and he will stick to it no matter how negatively it may impact himself.  He meets Oh Mi Joo, a translator with her own strange quirks and sparks fly as Mi Joo is assigned to be his interpreter.  
Surprise Thirst-worthiness: I kind of watched this drama by accident.  I had read about Im Siwan starring in a new drama but nothing I saw from the description or promos for Run On appealed to me.  Nor did it give me any information about what the drama would be about.  Then one day, I just happened to be browsing Netflix for something to play in the  background and decided on Run on since I thought I wouldn’t be that invested.  What a happy accident that turned out to be because I’m so in love with this drama right now.  This is a case where the thirst does not stem from the character’s physical appearance, but from the intensity/charisma the actor brings to the character and the character himself.  Ki Seon Geom is so odd, but so appealing at the same time and Im Siwan is so magnetic in the role.  Prior to Run On, Im Siwan wasn’t really my type physically.  In fact, I always scratched my head whenever people called him handsome in dramas (I know, I know, forgive me).  So color me shocked when I found myself swooning all over Im Siwan in the second episode of Run On.  Now, it’s like I have “Im Siwan is attractive” glasses on and he looks attractive in everything to me.  I want to gobble up all the dramas he’s been in.
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Hello yes, could you elaborate on the Comte wedding event pleease. Crying and fangirling and dying are all acceptable. I missed it and I adore your rambles about Comte? Thank you either way.
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!!! I’d be delighted to!! And awww, I’m so glad :D I love to write about him in any capacity, it makes me so happy to know people enjoy it when I do! Tysm for the full license to cry/fangirl/die because lbr it ain’t a Comte event if all three of those things don’t happen .Please don’t worry, I don’t mind talking abt it anyway! 💕💕💕
Okay my fellow Comte stans, you know the drill! I’ll be placing the details of the Wedding Story Event (jpn version) below the cut! Please don’t read if you want to wait for the official translation, and I hope you enjoy if you do take a peak! c:
AIGHT Y’ALL in fair Verona where we lay our scene-- This event begins on a lovely summer day with Comte and MC at a boutique picking out a wedding dress for their upcoming ceremony. As usual, she provides a bit of background as to how we got here. Comte doesn’t have a proposal event (as far as I know) like the other suitors because he actually proposes marriage in his MS. I won’t go too far into details just in case, but they essentially swear their love to each other in a church at night--just the two of them. (I’m not 100% sure, but I think this event takes place on the anniversary of the vow that they shared, what Comte called becoming “a vampire’s bride.” Yes it’s as hot as it sounds AND I LOVED IT). Now, despite their private promise to each other, Comte does specify that he fully intends to have a public wedding whenever she feels comfortable doing that. As such, this event is picking up from there.
With all the nitty gritty settled, it’s time to get to the fun bits. So Comte is weaving in and out of the dresses, trying to find the perfect one for his beloved. MC is equal parts exasperated but amused, and she notes that it reminds her so much of when she first debuted in high society (reference to the beginning of Comte’s MS). Back then, when she agreed to debut, he told her that he would immediately send word to his tailor to make the necessary preparations. It’s a kind of nostalgic moment; she remembers how thorough and excited he was (”I’ll be sure to show off your every charm”), and he’s effusing that energy in the boutique too. Eventually he settles on two of them and requests that they both be prepared, and MC sputters. She’s like Comte???? W H Y we only need one dress???? And he insists that, since it’s a special occasion, there’s no harm in it is there? He also goes on to say that it is in line with her culture’s tradition of “dyeing the bride in the husband’s colors.” MC shoots back that the tradition doesn’t entail several wedding dresses for the bride, but he pays the correction no mind. Y’all. I loved this part because it just emphasizes how much of a LIL SHIT he can be. Like he’s 100% harmless but I was like BOI IF U DON’T--I WILL KISS UR CUTE FACE. YOU STOP THAT.
I find it interesting especially because it remains in line with a trend about Comte that is so arresting for me, something that I find so endearing about him. I’ll note other places in the event I find it, but in this moment he is revealing something critical: for all of his capacity to play with the language and expectations that other people have/use, he only ever uses it for good. Here he’s purely being playful (with a stark note of respect and awareness); he has no intention of overwhelming her or undermining her cultural expectations of what a wedding means. Especially because MC, even in her monologue, isn’t truly upset--she honestly seems to find it adorable and funny more than anything. It’s also clear that Comte is working within her comfort zones. While he would buy the entire damn boutique if she let him, he settles on two because he knows it would stress her out otherwise (MC tends to be p pragmatic, not really about extravagance she is a mood).
And so they make their selection and exit the boutique, and they’re walking arm in arm back to the carriage. Comte laments narrowing it down to only two, but he’s happy they found something nice. MC thanks him for bringing her along, but he says it’s only natural--he wanted to pick out the dress the world would see together, he would never be happy with it otherwise. MC melts (WHO WOULDN’T) and says she’s really looking forward to wearing them, and he’s shook AF. 
(OKAY BUT I NEED TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS. DOES HE UNDERSTAND HOW TOUCHED I AM. DOES HE KNOW. His route hammers home this idea that for Comte, being with someone absolutely means being on the same page. It means being there for each other yes--but it also means making sure the other person feels wanted and included. He could have so easily just picked his favorite and been like “yeah this is what we’re going with.” But not only does he not do that, he refuses the very idea of a ceremony without it. He wants this to mean something for both of them, and he’s more than willing to put in the time and effort to ascertain that. I’M FUCKING TENDER OKAY. HE CARES SO MUCH AND I SOB)
He asks her if there’s anything else that she really, really wants for their wedding, and she thinks it through. It’ll be a reasonably sized wedding, with the men of the mansion in attendance and most of their closer high society friends. They’ve picked out a dress, the venue is set, the people closest to her will be there...she really can’t think of anything else? So she asks him if he has anything he really wants to do for the wedding, and he replies in the negative too, saying that “My only ideal wedding can be one in which I can see you at your most happy." ARE YOU KIDDING ME--Before MC can recover from that, he goes on: "Even now, I'm enjoying the preparations, and I want to do whatever I can for you." MC feels like she can never win against his sweet affection, so she nearly kills him with her answering line: "It’s more than enough. More than anything, being able to swear our love together again--to renew our vow--is the best part of it all." Comte is visibly shocked and is quiet for moment (MAN DOWN!!!!!!!!! VAMPIRE DOWN GET THE DEFIBRILATORS!!!!! LEONARDO PUT THAT LIGHTNING ROD AWAY I SWEAR TO GOD--) before he just replies with a “Is that so :>>>” And translating this nearly killed me [At the sight of his gentle smile, I smile back.] IM GOING TO SCREAM THEY ARE JUST SO TENDER IM SOFTE????????????
As they’re walking, Comte asks MC to tell him about weddings in her time. What were they like? He wants a reference point. She goes on to describe how ceremonies really range from formal to more informal affairs, and gets to a little custom that’s apparently held in Japan. When a groom intends to marry a bride, he will go to the bride’s family to ask for their approval. Comte visibly seems concerned about it, and I’m pretty sure he feels bad denying her that experience; not only did he propose to her without knowing any of that, her family isn’t within range to be able to honor it properly now. Even so, he keeps listening and comments now and again with a great deal of interest, paying close attention. He asks, what happens if the groom is rejected by the family? MC goes on to say that it’s a kind of test of perseverance: the groom is expected to ask/prove himself until he gets an answer in the affirmative. Internally, she notes that such a thing rarely ever happens irl--it’s mostly dramatized in movies and TV shows. She used to dream of how thrilling it might be to have someone do that for her, but it was mostly just a silly little fancy, nothing she was obsessed over. Comte, being a literal fucking legend, senses this emotional shift in milliseconds, and starts musing about something. When she tries to ask what’s up, he’s like not to worry leave everything to me.
PLEASE CUE THE CIRCUS MUSIC. BECAUSE THIS IS ABSOLUTELY GOING TO TURN INTO A CLOWN FEST.
So it cuts to them back home and Comte is asking Sebastian to give MC’s hand in marriage. Sebastian is utterly bEWILDERED and is like “I mean I understand I’m probably the closest relative she has right now but also WHAT!? YOU’RE MY BOSS/LORD I’M YOUR BUTLER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD”. Comte 100% is undaunted by this very normal reaction and insists that class/status has no place in matters like this, and Sebastian and MC are desperately trying to stop him from bowing his head/kneeling. MC notes she never expected him to take it to heart, tells him "Comte, you really don't have to go that far, it's a custom not a duty--" (IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY????? YOU CAN FEEL THEIR MOUNTING CONCERN AND I CAN’T BELIEVE COMTE WAS STRAIGHT UP JUST “i am not above begging” AND THEY’RE LIKE YOU SHOULD BE YOU SHOULD BE ABOVE BEGGING)
The circus only escalates when Leo comes in LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF "damn...bahahahhahahaaaaa now THIS oughtta be good/interesting." MC (and I simultaneously) start yelling at him and he replies "What? Comte's already ready and willing, why stop him?" For whatever reason, this gives Comte an idea (NEVER A GOOD SIGN) and he’s like you know what? That’s actually perfect, get everybody in here I’m gonna ask them for permission too :D
Several things I want to say about this. 1. COMTE LITERALLY DOES NOT EVEN REACT TO LEO’S MOCKING HE JUST “omg ur face was useful for smth for once this gives me an idea” 2. META TIME. First and foremost, I seriously can’t deal. This man knows MC has nothing because of her traveling through time, no friends or family--he’s always so, so aware of what she’s sacrificing to be with him. It is never outside of his thinking. Not only does this decision solidify her presence as a member of their family (I’m just so UGLY SOBBING about the fact that he does not consider them all ANYTHING LESS--THEY ARE HIS CHIRREN AND HE LOVES THEM AND I’M SOFT) this is also such a brilliant, strategic move on his part. Not only is he doing this to fulfill her younger wishes of having someone be so confident in their love for her that they would insist on it in front of her family/loved ones--his doing this also solidifies her presence as his wife within the mansion from here on. There can be no mistake; this is an unquestionable statement as to how her identity has shifted in meaning, a powerful allusion to his possessive streak. (and WE LOVE THAT FOR US HELL YEAH) 
Furthermore, I continue to be fascinated by the way he keeps subverting traditional or expected forms of supplication. While many could see this as a yielding of his pride (and in some ways he undeniably is) this choice to acknowledge her culture’s customs yields much more valuable dividends for him. 1. MC--notorious for never betraying the things she wants, having trouble asking for anything--is have her dreams fulfilled even if they were just silly little fantasies from when she was young. He’s actively making her happy, and he gets to openly gush about how much he loves her (FOR HIM THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF A WIN-WIN YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND--) 2. This is a way for him to make amends and do proper respect to the marriage customs of her place/time, and that’s infinitely important to him. He’s trying to set a precedent; that even if he ever does make a mistake or neglect something (even if accidental) he will do his utmost to make it right, pride and money be DAMNED. 
While it can be argued that he’s just being silly and over-the-top, when you look closely this is 100% a clever, very mindful approach to their future. While it may partially have been executed on an emotional/excited whim, he is also claiming MC as his own in the most clear and respectful way possible. And tbh that’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen 
So, after Leo walks in on them everyone else starts filing in one at a time (OKAY YOU CAN’T CONVINCE ME THAT THEY WEREN’T ALL HUDDLED UP TO THE DOOR SQUIRMING TO HEAR WHAT WAS GOING ON AND AT SOME POINT LEO SAID “omfg i gotta see this dumbass bitch on his knees” AND BLEW THEIR COVER/MADE THEM EVEN MORE CURIOUS):
Jeanne: "It's so noisy in here." 
Mozart: "What's going on?"
Comte: "Ah, excellent timing. I want to get permission from everyone."
Vincent: "?????? Did you do something wrong Comte?? What could you possibly need forgiveness for?"
Isaac: "A mistake made/wrongdoing by Comte?...Why am I dreading what it could be..."
Dazai: “Ah yes, yes I see, you are asking for a young lady's hand in marriage” (IM WHEEZING BC EVERYONE ELSE IS SO LOST AND HE'S JUST 100% ON THE BALL KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING ON THE NARRATIVE DISSONANCE IM CRYING)
Theo: Young lady??? The hell are you going on about
So things are getting increasingly chaotic and MC is just [jfc this is getting out of hand, Comte they don’t even know what you’re asking them to do]. She tries to explain but falters, and Comte puts an arm around her--signals that he’ll give  them the context. So he tells them "You all know that our wedding day is approaching. As such, I'm asking you all for your approval in taking MC as my bride. No matter what happens, I promise to make her happy forever--for every moment, every second of our time together. Please, forgive my taking her" (WHEN I TELL YOU MY HEAD WAS IN MY HANDS IDK HOW MC DIDN’T DIE ON THE SPOT S I R. SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) MC: [...Comte...My heart melts at his confession, at his earnest plea. It feels like every single iota of our feelings are infused in every word he speaks, teeming with the love shared between us in overwhelming measure.]
For a little while silence falls until Napoleon speaks up, and honestly? It was so sweet ;-; I tear up every single time: “Forgiven. You know how much I dislike formalities anyway. And besides, who could say no to le Comte?” MC notes that everyone murmurs in agreement and a kind of warmth settles in the room. Arthur notes that MC will be a Comtesse very soon and MC just. I’m going to be a WHAT now (”C-c-comtesse??”). And it’s so FUCKING FUNNY YOU CAN FEEL THE RED EYE EDIT MEME ON COMTE WHEN HE GOES “Oh? Is there anything wrong with that? Everybody said yes, after all :>” MC internally accuses them of ganging up on her, but reveals that more than anything she’s a little overwhelmed by the outpouring of love in the best way:
MC: [Overwhelmed with feeling; touched, a little shy, embarrassed, but also full of joy--my eyes burn at the edges with tears] “I'm glad everyone approves c:”
Comte: Agreed :> your country/homeland has a nice custom. A v important step to inviting my loved one into my life as my wife :>>>>
So it then cuts to them in Comte’s room after the circus and MC thanks him for the sweet confession in front of everyone, tells him how happy it made her. He insists that it was only natural he would, and that it isn’t even enough.
Comte: “I am the one...your life, your time as a human being; I'll be taking all of it from you.”
MC: [...Comte? He took my hand with a very serious expression]
Comte: "As I said before, I will make you a vampire someday."
MC: “Don't call it that--a price. I want to live with you too!”
MC notes that while she hasn’t made the leap yet, she knows she’ll be ready for it soon enough. 
Comte: “Thank you. But the last thing I want is to take things from you, I want to do everything I can to make you happy, to make you smile. Whether that means weddings, requests--anything in my power.”
COMTE REALLY SAID "she is entrusting me with her future and that means I have the responsibility of not only ascertaining her happiness, but proving my unwavering devotion to it" AND IM HOLLERING????? LADIES GET YOU A FUCKING MANS. MC finally begins to understand this, and she’s like OMFG is that why you went off so hard this afternoon???? And Comte’s like :>>>> guilty as charged, though I think I'm also just still excited about the wedding too, haha! They hug it out (YESSSSSSS LET ME H O L D) and MC asks him again if there’s anything he wants for the wedding too. Aight y’all I would be irresponsible if I didn’t warn you beforehand, get fucking tissues. I’m still upset abt his answer and I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. He thinks about it for a bit, before kissing her forehead and saying “I suppose, can you pray for my happiness too? That's enough."
AIGHT IMMA GO BACK TO THE EVENT IN A SECOND BUT I GOTTA SAY. BITCH. BITCH ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????? COMTE THAT ISN’T OPTIONAL THAT’S A GOD DAMN PREREQUISITE?????????????????? OFC WE WISH FOR YOUR HAPPINESS WHAT THE FUCK??????????????? THE A U D A C I T Y. I’VE NEVER BEEN MORE INSULTED IN ALL MY LIFE. OKAY RANT OVER.
MC is surprised but naturally agrees to it, having wanted that for him even without prompting. She continues to think on it, insisting that she wants to do something for him too. An idea sparks but it only says that she made preparations without telling him anything for now, preparing a tangible sign of her love for the wedding.
The premium end begin here. She’s getting dressed for the wedding, and she’s--as usual--in awe of his perfect selection of accessories/jewelry to go with the gown. She’s about to put on her shoes when she notices something odd, and there’s a knock at the door. Comte enters to ask if she’s ready, and they both freeze and stare at each other. They both sheepishly admit to being completely taken with the sight of the other, and they laugh about it together. Comte tries to ask if she’s ready again, and she assures him that she is--just that she found something unexpected in her shoes.
He explains that the coin is an English six pence. Sebastian told him that they are no longer made in her time, and Comte explains he acquired it about three hundred years ago in England when he was living there (he says that he kept it back then because he liked the design on it). He explains that there is a tradition, that the English would put a six pence in a bride’s left shoe in the hopes of wishing her good fortune and prosperity in her oncoming union. MC has her understandable and customary (JESUS I FORGET HOW OLD THIS MAN IS SOMETIMES) and he places a hand over hers that’s holding the coin when she starts staring at it. 
Comte: "Hey, MC....Time goes by, and various things will continue to change. Among them, it is only vampires who survive without dying or changing."
MC: "Comte..."
Comte: "I used to think that made it--made us--empty. But...I don't think that's the case anymore. I'm proud of being able to keep this undying, unchanging love for you."
[He put the coin back in my left shoe, and offered them to me--gentle as though they were made of glass(Cinderella's)]
MC spends this exchange on the verge of tears, but keeps it together for the wedding. It depicts their loved ones all around them as they walk down the aisle, and skips to the end of the ceremony. The priest tells Comte he may now kiss the bride (WHEN I WAS TRANSLATING IT SAID “KISS YOUR BUSINESS” AND WHEN I TELL YOU I WHEEZED), but just as he’s about to lift her veil--she stops him in his tracks. He’s confused, and says her name, but she reassures him that she just wants to offer him a wedding gift before he lifts it. Hidden in her bouquet are two pins that she had made, and she pins them to his jacket. They were made from preserved flowers, encased in metal to render them undying/everlasting. 
MC: [Me too...I want to wish for your happiness...]
MC: “For you, things might feel fleeting--like they just pass you by, are lost before you can grasp them. But even so, my feelings won't change; just like this preserved/undying flower and the life of a vampire--dedicated to [Comte's real name] in everlasting love."
COMTE.EXE HAS CURRENTLY SHUTDOWN. REBOOTING.
MC notes that his eyes get misty and he leans his forehead against hers.
MC: [Comte's real name]? 
Comte: .................I want to hug you as tight as I possibly can, but I'd hate to ruin the flowers/your gift to me
BITCH WHEN I TELL YOU I SOBBED. WHEN I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1. I CANT GET OVER THE FACT THAT HER GIFT IS NOT ONLY CANON BUT ITS LITERALLY ON HIS WEDDING SPRITE, HER LOVE IS A VISIBLE MANIFESTATION ON HIS PERSON ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2. THE FACT THAT SHE ONLY ADMITS TO BEING THE HAPPIEST SHE CAN BE WHEN SHE SEES HIM SO HAPPY TOO. THIS IS SO MUCH. SO M U C H
And so Comte lifts her veil and kisses her gently uwu cover ur eyes chirren, the hall erupts in raucous applause and the crowd starts congratulating them!! Comte then encourages everyone to have fun, and the reception takes on the vibe of a kind of social gathering. MC notes that he seems to prefer this level of interaction, just relaxed and everyone chill, and she turns to tell him that it seems like it’ll be fun! Before she can finish her sentence, he kisses her fiercely before leaning back with a sigh, "It's still not enough, but I'll save the rest for later tonight." BITCH!!?!?!??!??!? HOW THE FUCK CAN ANYONE FOCUS ON A STUPID PARTY WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT, HELLO???????MC notes: [Everyone from the mansion that saw the kiss made fun of me endlessly, and I hid my face in my bouquet] SAVE HER. Once again, it skips to the end of the reception and they’re now in Comte’s room. (I will blink twice if I think you need tissues BLINKS TWICE) 
Comte: "Yup, perfect." [He places the flower pins I gave him next to THE hourglass in the room, looking pleased HNGNNGNGNNGGNGN MY EYE HOLES ARE SUFFERING
MC: "I'm glad you liked the gift c:" 
Comte: "It is proof of your unchanging love, of course I cherish it :>"
She’s just so happy to see him so delighted with it. He asks how she liked the ceremony, and she gushes about how much she loved it. He hugs her (AWWWWWWWWWWWW) and then he notes that while it was fun to celebrate, all he wants now is time with his wife (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA). He starts kissing her like the world is ending, and she says she needs to get changed--but he doesn’t care, says she’s fine as she is and that he wants her right now.
Aight usually I don’t get into epilogue territory, but honestly, this shit was JUST too good. Now this man made of magic asks MC if she’s wearing her bridal garter (you know, the one that usually comes with the whole bride ensemble in Western tradition). And she’s like ???? Uh, yeah, of course? Why... He says that he saw something interesting at a friend’s wedding reception once upon a time, and explains that the garter is usually removed and thrown to the bachelors (analogous to the bride’s throwing her bouquet, and whoever catches it will be the next to get married). PLEASE NOTE HE IS KISSING HER FOR LIKE 90% OF THIS IT’S AMAZING
MC: "So it's like the bouquet toss?" 
Comte: "Yes. Now then, how did he remove the garter...?”
HE DUCKS DOWN AND SHE’S LIKE COMTE!?!?
Comte: “...Ah yes, the groom removes it with his teeth >:D”
And so this man HAS THE TIME OF HIS LIFE tugging it down slowly under her dress, caressing her legs and loving every part of her. MC’s face is on fire, and she’s torn between being turned on and embarrassed. Eventually he reappears after teasing her MERCILESSLY and admits that he didn’t do it at the reception because he didn’t want anyone else to see her reaction. Blushing, shy, desirous--all of these feelings are his to keep and enjoy. (I!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!!!! HOW SUBTLY POSSESSIVE HE IS AAAAAAAAAA) MC notes internally that she feels the same way about him, how he only shows this intensely passionate side to her. Comte is uncharacteristically impatient and frenzied that night, and they both go at it.
It skips to midnight where the two are cuddling in the aftermath, just being cute and happy. Comte, the absolute MADLAD is already thinking about how to celebrate next year--and she just giggles at him (he’s a wackadoo but he’s her wackadoo LMFAO MOOD) and he laughs with her. They essentially swear to promise their love over and over in the future, and it just ends on that wholesome note :>>>
Also can I just. The fact that he lived for so long alone, but was always, always paying attention to all of these little things that are done with a person’s loved one ;-; that he would remember his friend doing that at his wedding and be like BROOOOO I WANNA DO THAT IF I EVER GET MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!! I just. It’s so heartbreaking and touching at the same time, I just want to hold him forever ;-; the fact that he doesn’t seem to worry as much about his own happiness, seems absolutely floored that MC would do anything in return. I JUST LOVE HIM WITH EVERYTHING INSIDE OF ME 
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THIS IS WHAT PEAK PERFORMANCE LOOKS LIKE
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ghostofcitrus · 3 years
Text
more gender crisis bc i need somewhere to document this shit and also if u wanna read and say smth that’s cool too 🥺 fair warning it’s kinda longgg. but there’s a tl;dr and i tried to make the paragraphs short so it’s easy to read and i sorted the thoughts by paragraphs
ok so when i see a girl or group of girls or smth i, for the most part, am like yeah same. i have the same lived experience and like yeah u look cool and i relate in a lot of ways.
but like i also feel the same w non-binary ppl. i see agender ppl and i’m like oh nice that sounds like how i want to live MY life!! i get jelous. i saw a gender ambiguous person the other day and i thouvht i was going to lose my mind i was like AKSJSHJSJSNS Y O U. I WANT TO BE YOU. i talked to them i was like 😭😭i love your hair😭😭 and it was so compelling just seeing them i got my hair cut later that week. i like it.
and i cut my hair and i’m like y e s. and i’ve always wanted a very small/flat chest and have planned on getting a breast reduction (meaning i want basically no tits. i’m like a DDD rn. and i’m short and have a baby face so that’s like. very noticeable. pain.) ASAP. but i like dress and being seen as a girl? but i also want to be non binary, but it feels like something im striving for. i don’t feel like i’m there. i feel like i WANT to be there but i just keep hitting roadblocks.
when i think about OTHER girls, i’m like yeah. i relate to that. but when i think about myself. fully isolated. i want to present like a feminine agender person. i am connected to my girlhood. girl, sister, girlfriend, daughter... all of them accurately describe me. but i also like person, sibling, partner, child.
i like femininity. i like being seen like that. and being seen as a girl is cool and fine. but i don’t feel like it accurately describes all of me. but i’m like scared??
i want to be a “girl” in the way that when u look at me ur like ... is that a girl? my face i like lmao. it’s round and feminine. cool lol. my body.... i wish with like all my heart i woke up one day w/o titties or major curves. but i’ve literally work so hard to accept and like myself in my body. YEARS of forcing myself to look in the mirror and compliment myself. deconstructing fatphobia was a big part of it. but in my head. with no mirrors around. i think of myself as less curvy. a small fame, but not really curvy. much more neutral features. i forget what i actually look like. but when i do look in the mirror now i’m like she’s pretty. i like how she looks. nice. but it doesn’t really feel like me. but i feel cool. it’s like nice makeup that’s someone else chose for u and never comes off. like yes. that’s nice. but... it’s not like “me”. i feel like that about most of my features. but i’ve grown up in them. i don’t hate them. i think they look pretty and i feel confident enough like this. and after all the work i’ve done to get to this mindset... it’s just not what i want.
i think part of what’s messing with me is i’m automatically more comfortable with other girls/afabs, like we just share experiences and i can generally understand how they socialize. guys like,.. not so much. but most of my actual friends have ended up being guys. but im naturally wary of guys. and most around me end up being fucking republicans anyways. and another part of what’s getting to me is when i’m going about my life, i enjoy being stereotypically feminine. like i like to be taken care of, feel small , that bs. maybe it’s internalized misogyny that i feel like the only way i can be that is as a girl.
i also think i just have no idea what it would really feel like to go about the world non-binary. like i just want to keep blending into the background. i don’t want to be that noticeably different, i’m already autistic.
i think it’s also weird bc since middle school have been having periodic gender crisises but they always end in me just getting embarrassed, finding transmeds on the internet and also getting embarresed, not wanting to stop being feminine, or deciding it’s just not worth it.
and i think another thing is, i’ve always felt more connected to girls, but always on the outskirts of that, but that might just be because i’m autistic. but like i’m feminine in the sense that i like dresses. and being taken care of that and that shit. girls tend to really fucking irk me a lot of the times. i don’t really feel “connected” to them, more like “stuck” with them but making the best of it. some are pretty cool :) tbh it’s mostly just other autistic or queer girls i vibe with. other than that.. i struggle a lot to feel connected.
speaking of being autistic.... i’m realizing a lot of what i’m feeling is similar to how i felt when i first started to consider that i was autistic. when i was alone or in a space i was totally comfy in, i felt very confident that i was autistic. but when i was around people, i was like no i’m definitely not. and even now. i know i mask whenever i’m not alone. but i’m literally so fucking used to it it’s not hard at all. it hardly feels like a mask. just a different version of me. not the most authentic, but it’s how i operate around others. so whatever. not what i like per say. but in most cases, i can deal with it and still be perfectly happy (ish). this is exactly how i feel about all of this gender shit.
but i think part of my hesitancy to identify like this is i’ve never met ppl irl who identify as non-binary. that wouldn’t be a group for me to find and relate to and be comfortable with, i’d just be the different one. and i’m already different. and people don’t really get neopronouns and that shit.
ok and i’m anxious about my boyfriend as well. he’s a straight guy, idk how he’d feel about me being non binary. but i don’t want to sacrifice our relationship, so it’d be fine, because i also like my name and pronouns now. i like the shortened version of my name better tbh but i think my name sounds cool. mostly because saying it is a vocal stim for me, same with my partners name fore some reason. i just think they’re good names. they feel good to hear and say. and i’ve always been described that way and i’m like yeah that’s me.
i like dresses. feminine clothes? yes pleaseee. i like how girl are generally the ones who get taken care of. i like feeling small and dainty. i like being silly and cute. but like ... silly and cute arent like “girl things”?? but idk.
but i like “girl”. not “ladies” or “woman”. that feels too much like “female” and the only time i feel like i relate to that at all is in very specific situations. i’m feminine. i like that. i wish i could be feminine in an androgynous way tho????????
TL;DR: closing thoughts. if i were the only person on earth and i could do whatever i wanted like magically. i would change my appearance to look like my picrew... but like for an ex think Crona from Soul Eater of Ed from Cowboy Bebop. both of them are androgynous but when i see both of them i’m like they’re kinda feminine too! like that’s what i want to look like. i’d probably go by Citrus and neopronouns and maybe she/her (they’re fine but i feel like i’m lying about being non binary when i use them). ya know. how i want to be. but in reality. i am scared of that. it sounds like a lot of work and a big change that i could probably never really achieve. i also hate change. and constantly explaining shit.
also do cis people PINE over this shit the way i am? i’ve done this multiple times for years. not consistently bc tbh i have other shit i need to spend energy on but when i’m not pouring energy into somewhere else i tend to circle back to this. maybe that’s a sign that i’m right.
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shhh-no-ones-home · 4 years
Text
married with children ryan sitkowski x reader
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title: they get married, ryan acts like a child when drunk lol
beginning is super cute and sweet but per usual things go awry pretty quickly lmfao
Song: with or without you by U2
@musicsexandpizza69 @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @theoneandonlykymberlee @cynic-spirit @thisplace-ishaunted @lifeisabitchandsoareyou @bleed-to-make-amends
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he had never even thought about marriage. when this all started he wanted nothing to do with it. we both knew we were in for the long haul but he didnt care about tying the knot and he told me that, right from square one. i went back to that moment over and over again throughout our entire relationship, never once doubting him or questioning it. it wasnt for everyone after all. i went over it in my mind again and again when he actually proposed to me. i was so happy i cried as soon as he started talking, telling me how much he loved me and how much i meant to him as he got down on one knee. and now im going over it again as im standing in front of a tall mirror, my best friend helping me put my veil into my hair. i stared at myself and my red puffy eyes from crying with my mother earlier as i got my dress on.
half of me wondered if he had cried yet today too, it was an emotional event after all. i guess id just have to find out later. i heard a knock at the door, turning my attention to it as my mother half opened the door. she sighed in relief before opening it fully and letting my dad in. my friend helped me off the pedestal and put my veil down, handing me my bouquet as my father took my arm in his.
"you look absolutely beautiful."
he said, making me smile as we walked out of the room.
"thanks daddy."
i said as i watched the wedding party descend down the stairs. we had chosen to have a small wedding party, a maid of honor and a best man only, with a flower girl and a ring bearer. we didnt want anything crazy and only invited close friends and family. the reception would be bigger however, more of a gathering than the actual ceremony. i breathed deeply as i heard the wedding bells ring through the church, oh what it took to actually get him to do this in a church. i clutched onto my fathers arm as we began the long walk to the alter. all eyes were on me and i felt uncomfortable at first but as soon as i looked at him i couldnt stop and their gazes didnt matter anymore.
i was smiling like an idiot as a tear slid down my cheek, he looked so happy standing between the priest and aj. as we got close to the alter the butterflies slowly ebbed. i was marrying my best friend, i had nothing to worry about anymore. i could see him more clearly now as aj nudged his arm and handed him a handkerchief. he was crying too, which made me laugh a little bit. he stepped down as my father offered my hand to him which he gladly took.
"take care of her."
he whispered and ryan nodded, taking me to the alter and facing the priest. I couldn't help but smile, only hearing half the words he said as I tried to sneak quick glances over at Ryan before we could face each other. He looked so handsome in his suit, the rose pinned to his lapel a nice shade of lavender. This almost felt like a dream.
°°°°°°°°°
As the music played I held onto Ryan for dear life. It was the first dance after all and I felt so uncomfortable being the only couple on the dance floor as we swayed back and forth. the alcohol we had been consuming so far didnt really help, despite my hope that it would. He still had that wide smile plastered across his face though.
"I don't know if I told you this already but you look beautiful today."
He said, making me smile back at him. Then I saw a flash, noticing the photographer.
"You're not so bad yourself Mr Sitkowski."
I felt his thumb rub gently into my side.
"Thank you, Mrs Sitkowski."
he quipped back. I couldn't help the blush creeping its way up my neck and to my face.
"I'm so glad we finally decided to do this ry."
I said, looking at him longingly. I watched as he scanned my face.
"So am I. I know I said a thousand years ago that I wouldn't ever do this but I'm beyond proud to call you my wife now."
i smiled widely at him as we swayed back and forth in a small circle, the music playing in the background.
"im not gonna lie, i was shocked but i think this is the best thing ive ever done. you really are my best friend."
he leaned in and pressed his forehead to mine as the music slowed and people clapped.
"im so glad i get to spend the rest of my life with you."
°°°°°°°°°
i sat down into the bench with a loud sigh, looking over to ryan who had just done the same. my dress was flowing over onto his lap but he didnt push it away. i looked over to him and smiled.
"we made it."
i said through a laugh, him sending me a wide smile back.
"the wedding and reception are over with, now all we have to do is make it official."
he said boldly, raising his brows and leaning closer to me. i shook my head amused and pushed him away.
"i think it can wait for the honeymoon tomorrow, you are pretty plastered after all."
he pouted at me, his arms making their way around my waist loosely.
"can i at least get a kiss?"
he said with pleading eyes. i rolled my eyes but caved immediately.
"fine, but dont get any ideas big boy."
i said, pecking him quickly on the lips. he tasted like a mixture of alcohols but the most noticeable was the red wine.
"is everything taken care of?"
he asked, staring at me. i looked up to our relatives walking around the venue packing things up and nodded.
"it is being taken care of as we speak ry."
i said and he nodded, readjusting his grip on my body and resting his head against my shoulder.
"thats good."
he said through a sigh. i looked down at him as he watched everyone. then my brother came into view, the box with the punch bowl in it tucked under his arm.
"the car is almost ready if you two wanna go now."
i nodded, tapping ryans arm.
"you ready ry?"
i asked and he sat up, looking at me confused.
"ready for what?"
i laughed a little bit.
"to go, baby, its time to leave."
he smiled at me and nodded.
"oh, then yeah."
he stood up quickly, pulling me with him. i held his hand tightly so he wouldn't wander off as we followed my brother outside the venue.
"are we going home?"
he asked, looking around before patting his pants with his free hand.
"baby we cant, my keys are gone."
i kept pulling him forward.
"my brother has your keys, hes the one taking us home and the one taking us to the airport tomorrow."
he made an 'o' shape with his mouth as we made it to the car. my brother opened the backseat door and ryan climbed in head first, laying down and tucking his legs in. i shook my head in amusement as peter closed the door.
"thanks again for doing this. it really does mean a lot."
i said as he opened the hatch to put the bowl in the already packed car.
"oh, yeah, i wouldnt pass up an opportunity like this one."
he said through a laugh and i shook my head, smiling at him.
"hes not usually this much of a handful but if i were given one day to party like the end of the world id take it too."
he sent me a knowing look.
"you couldve, if i remember correctly that champagne made its way to you a few times."
i scoffed at him as he opened the passenger door for me.
"who wants to get drunk off champagne? either way, one of us has to be the responsible one. ill just have him make it up to me by carrying my drunk ass home some time during our honeymoon."
i said with a wink. he shook his head at me before closing the door.
"i can hear you ya know."
ryan said from the back, making me jump.
"jesus ry!"
i said, clutching my chest. he sent me a lazy smile as he sat up, placing his head on the shoulder of the seat.
"i just want you to know that i will gladly carry your ass anywhere."
i laughed a little to myself before turning and pecking him gently on the lips.
"thanks ry, that means a lot."
he nodded once, proudly, to himself before falling back into the seat.
"i love you after all. what kind of husband would i be if i didnt."
i looked at him in the rearview mirror, a lazy smile plastered on his face as he toyed with his wedding ring happily. in that moment i knew, he really did mean it. it was enough to make me melt inside, and i wouldve cried had pete not been in the process of getting in the car. i turned back to him, him looking at me with the proudest look on his face.
"i love you too ry,"
i reached back and patted his knee gently.
"now lets go home."
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chimswae · 4 years
Text
BTS Caretaker CH23
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Summary: She may think she has Bangtan Sonyeondan wrapped around her fingers. She may think it is easy to love the members equally without hurting any soul. She may think the boys wont fall head over heels for her. She assumes it is okay to show a little love and affection towards the boys, what if she gets it all wrong? What if it only brings more complication to her already complicated life? Can she survive their charms? Will she be able to resist them? What if they just wont let her go?
- Pairing: BTS x Oc ( Yoongi x OC, Jungkook x OC)
- Genre: Fluff, Slight Angst, Romance, Idol!au
- Word Count: 4, 330
- Author Note: So im late, i will do double update! so please check on next chapter too~ :) thank u for whoever that read my cliche story HAHAHA i have no words to describe how im embarassed i am AHAHHAA anyways ~ 
Previous | Next
Chapter 23
Promotional month embarked the start of everything.  Hectic schedule, unreasonable amount of sleep time in a day, the most would be 2 hours and not to mention the studios and practice rooms would be their second home for the time being. The boys had been practicing non-stop these past few days until their official comeback early in February. This time their popularity soared higher than their previous comeback. It felt like a dream, but the boys did it. Their album sales make it digital or physical had risen drastically in comparison to previous sales.
The impact of Bangtan Sonyeondan to the industry was no joke. More people showed their support and their fanbase grew two times bigger than before in the blink of an eyes. Phenomenal indeed. Overwhelmed by the support, the boys promised to work harder this year to repay Armys’ love. Entering the last week of their You Never Walk Alone promotion, the boys were ready to start their Wings Tour around the globe. Unlike before they went to few continents depending on the demand of the respected country however this time their schedule was utilized for the first half of 2017.
Seul massaged her aching muscle and sunk on the couch with sulky face. The dorm was quiet and cold since none of the boys were home at this time.  They would only be home around dawn to get short nap before heading to their next schedule early in the morning. Following the change of their schedule, Seul would take an evening shift and went to their place right after her shift. So, she could prepare advanced breakfast for them. It became her routine to come around 2 in the morning and stayed for two hours or more, making sure the boys got a proper breakfast despite their busy schedule.
Mrs Hwang on the other hand was well informed pertaining to Seul’s unusual activity and she would make Hoon, more like force his son to pick her sister up every day from work. World is a scary place, she did not want to risk Seul’s life though that girl was the one who insisted to change her caretaking schedule out of sudden.
Glancing on her phone screen, she decided to call it a day since it was already 3 A.M and surprisingly she managed to pull her work within an hour. Seul had informed Hoon in advance so the younger guy would not pick her up considering he had exam the next day. She did not want to be blame for his bad performance later on.
“Should I watch Tae’s drama to kill time?” grinning to herself, Seul made up her mind to catch the latest episode. As she expected, the boys had recorded every episode up till the latest one.
What a supportive boyfriend!
It took Seul a moment to remember the last episode she watched, then it came to her realization she was following the drama diligently every week. Seul never missed any episode since she watched this with her mother. Of course, her mother would watch it, we were talking about her so-called adoptive son on screen.
Satisfied with her choice, Seul sat with her leg cross on the couch gleefully. She was excited to see different side of Taehyung on screen. A side which could only be seen on screen. Indeed, BTS V nailed it so perfectly. There were times Taehyung would give her a call as soon as his drama aired that particular day just to hear her opinion. She couldn’t understand why her opinion matter in this anyways.
 “Seul-seul! Did you watch?” Taehyung’s voice croaked in happiness. Apart from his members comment, Taehyung anticipated Seul’s point of view every week caused him to automatically give the girl a call after a new episode aired.
Seul laughed softly at Taehyung’s weird antic “I watched it Tae” he hummed. “So how was it this week?” he chewed his lower lips knowing how bluntly honest she could be. Taehyung valued her honesty even though sometimes Seul would never leave her sassiness behind, he didn’t care. He basically grew up with Min Suga’s sarcasm so to hear something similar from Seul, he was already immune to it.
“Hurm.. do you want to hear the good one or the bad one first?” she poked fun making Taehyung pouted in his seat.
“I want to hear good one first” Seul could imagine Taehyung’s pouty lips as a protest whenever he was forced to make a complicated choice.
Pressing her lips together to suppress her laughter, Seul regained her composure to have a decent conversation with him “You are certainly better if we were to compare with the episode which you first appeared. You look natural and comfortable with your character now. As I mentioned before, I like how you portray your emotions through your deep eyes. It is not a joke. How did you do that?” she professed earnestly.
Her compliments flustered him “Urm…Thank you..You are flattering me”
“I am not..You really did well Tae. Don’t tell me you are blushing” she teased.
“YAH I AM NOT! Alright, I am ready to hear the bad one” Taehyung murmured under his breath with hope it was not as nasty as her first comment back then. “Listen carefully Kim Taehyung, I am about to say something that might hurt your heart” the tone of her voice was stern and cold.
“Ji Seul you are scaring me! Stop sounding so serious”
“I am trying to, okay give me a moment” he heard her heavy breathing at the end of the line as if she was in the middle of night work out. What was on her mind?
“Tae-ah..I think you are too adorable for me to handle. Shouldn’t Hansung be manlier?”
Taehyung gasped “Is that an insult?” her small giggle tickled his heart. “Or is it your way complimenting me?” he pressed. There were times he craved for this kind of attention from Seul, made him feel normal guy around his age. To have a simple conversation with a friend gave him tranquillity.
“Will you take that as an insult since you really hated cutesy stuff nowadays?”
“Armys think I am cute. I will live with that if it comes from Armys and you. Yah, I am serious. Tell me right now what is my flaw?” he insisted.
Seul shook her head “Couldn’t find it. You are a rookie, but you are doing great. My mom thinks your acting is real and she really into it. Don’t ask me who is her favourite character, because she is choosing you over Minho. Aren’t that too much that she’s giving extra attention on you?” Taehyung beamed.
“Why? Are you jealous that Ahjumma favours me more than you?”
“I am used to it, Bangtan boys this, Bangtan boys that. You can take my mom’s love, I have Eodeng and Eomuk to love me” he cringed at the response. “Ew, that simply means you have Jin hyung’s love. Those two brats are the mini Kim Seokjin” she rolled her eyes in process.
She retorted sarcastically “Who are you calling brat? You are the brat!”
 She found herself smiling at the memories, being with Taehyung made her comfortable. Something that she could feel whenever she’s with Jin and Hoseok. Returning her attention back to the screen, Seul watched the drama and clasped her hand excitedly.  A silly smile would appear on her face every time Taehyung appeared on screen along with small awe in between.
Few months ago, she ridiculed the power of Bangtan Sonyeondan on her now as time passed it slowly turned her into a fan. Guess, she was being supportive of her friends.
Yes, supportive sounds fitting.
 ------------------
“Sejin hyung quick quick my bladder is about to explode” Jimin whiney voice filled the emptiness of the hallway. Other members stood sleepily behind him. Meanwhile, Jimin was getting impatient to finish his business inside. “Gosh, why are you so whiney” he pressed the button hurriedly, entering the password.
As soon as Jimin heard the beep, he squished his small body between the door and Sejin and ran inside ignoring the older guy that were already pressed against the wall.“That kid!” Sejin hissed while shaking his head. He gave a soft pat on Jungkook back, making the maknae moved inside with a big yawn “Get some sleep everyone, you need to be ready in 4 hours” he ordered.
Jungkook screeched softly feeling his muscle stiffened at the sight before him “Seul?” he stared in disbelief. Sleeping peacefully on the couch was Seul with Hwarang still running in the background. A soft smile spread across his face since the last time he saw her was two weeks ago. He almost lost his balance when he felt someone crashed against his body from back, Kim Taehyung groaned in frustration.
“Yah, Gukkie why are you blocking the way” his bangs were poking his eyes making it hard for him to see the obstacle in front of him. Furthermore, in this sleepy state everything appeared irrelevant to him except for his comfortable bed. Confused, Taehyung’s eyes followed Jungkook and upon it landed on Seul’s figure, his eyes widened in sheer surprise.
“Seul? Seul is here?” he spoke lowly fully aware that their manager was still there.
“What should we do? Sejin hyung is here!” Jungkook started to panic. The hyungs made their entrance with questionable look but soon they gawked at the scene in front of them. It would be a huge trouble if their manager found out about Seul. The chances of her being fired was high.
It is 5 A.M why is she not home? Yoongi cursed, taking a glance at Sejin whom thankfully still at the doorstep gathering bags in process. Everyone was trying to come up with ways to hide Seul or to face Sejin’s wrath in a minute. Without wasting any time, Taehyung marched forward taking Seul in his arm casually surprising everybody in the room.
“What are you doing?” Yoongi inquired with concern look.
“We need to hide her”
“Yes, but where?”
“Lets just bring her to my room” Taehyung suggested earning a low protest from Yoongi and Jin. Nonetheless, they followed him afterwards.
Seul stirred in her sleep a little and snuggled her face at the crook of his neck, liking the familiar smell and warmth. Even in her sleep, she knew how to play with his heart. Taehyung tried to control himself from smiling foolishly as his main concern right now was to hide Seul from Sejin.
“I will distract Sejin hyung” Jungkook blurted out and quickly dashed to the main door followed by Hoseok behind. Namjoon and Jin assisted Taehyung to his room, opening the door for him so he could move Seul to safer place.
 “Hyung I forgot my headphones!” “Me too I forgot my-my game console!” Hoseok and Jungkook hollered in unison causing the older guy to eye them suspiciously.
He wiggled his finger to his headphone which hang loosely around his neck “That is your headphone Hobi and as for you Jungkook, I didn’t see you play any games today let alone having your game console with you” closing the door behind him, he placed the bags on the floor.
Hoseok gulped nervously exchanging nervous look with Jungkook “Urm…Sorry I seem to forget, but really I forgot something in the van!” he tried his luck one more time to convince Sejin. They knew it was not easy to lie on his face since he could read them so easily. Their manager knew when the boys were hiding something, like right now.
“I smell fear and lies. What are you hiding from me?” he quirked his brows prying answers out from the two boys before him.  
“Nothing, nothing” Jungkook palmed his hand against the wall awkwardly with a sheepish smile. He heard the commotion behind him meaning the hyungs were doing something about Seul, though he had no idea how much time they needed for him to stall their manager.
“If it is nothing, why are you blocking my way? Is there something that I shouldn’t see?”
Hoseok held both his palm out while cracking a nervous chuckle in between “Jimin.. I mean Jimin peed in his pant and it is disgusting. We have to clean the floor first. It is dirty, you can’t walk” Hoseok facepalmed at his idiotic ideas. It sounded ridiculous.
“YAH WHO PEED IN PANTS?” clueless Jimin exited the bathroom as his eyes threw daggers at Hoseok way. Hoseok grinded his teeth together chasing Jimin away from the scene but of course he would not budge even an inch. Park Jimin was persistent to begin with. He never let anyone taint his name.
Jungkook rubbed the back of his head in frustration ‘Jimin-ssi, can you be a little cooperative. Why out of all time’ the manager did not buy the boys lies so he forced himself inside. Being tall giving him advantage to dominate the boys. His eyes scanned the empty living room with suspicion whilst Jimin, Jungkook and Hoseok were having their secret banter behind.
“The caretaker came to clean the place?” he noticed the cleanliness of the place as he made his way to the kitchen. “I guess…” Hoseok murmured silently.
“Jimin-ssi, Seul is here we are trying to stall him! You are ruining the plan” Jungkook whispered under his breath making the shorter guy gasped realizing his own mistake. When he dashed inside, he didn’t catch a glimpse of anyone in the dorm. If and only he realized it sooner this thing could be prevented. The three musketeers kept their eyes on the manager hyung whom busy inspecting every corner of their place.
Namjoon, Jin and Yoongi exited Taehyung’s room as their eyes spotted the three boys stood in line with their hands neatly together, they shot them a bewildered look “Yah are you crazy! Don’t act suspicious, hyung might find out!” Namjoon scowled lowly afraid that the older guy overheard him.
“Get into your room now and act naturally” Jin mouthed them. The three musketeers scurried off almost bumping into each other before each of them got into their room without trouble. The sound of heavy footstep alarmed the remaining members, and they decided to avoid their manager at all cost.
 On the other hand, Taehyung had already changed into his pyjamas in order to appear more convincing in case their manager decided to appear magically in his room. From time to time he threw a nervous glance at the door feared to witness an unwelcoming sight. Judging from the message in their group chat, Sejin was inspecting every nook and cranny of the dorm started from Jungkook. Taehyung’s room is a room away from him that scared the shit out of him.
He stared at Seul while trying to find perfect way to hide her from their manager. “Screw this” caressing his fluffy hair out of frustration, he turned off the main light and slipped under the cover beside Seul. Taehyung bit his lower lips, apologizing non-stop since he was about to initiate something inappropriate. The girl was unconscious, and he was literally touching her without her consent.
She will understand, she will. Taehyung prayed in his head that Seul would not wake up until this nerve wrecking scene ended.
“Fuck” his eyes rounded upon seeing the shadow behind the creak of his door. Using his long hand to reach the lamp on his night stand, he switched off swiftly. Taehyung pulled the cover under his chin, wrapping one of his arm securely around Seul’s waist. His heart pounded due to the proximity and it doubled when he heard Sejin’s footstep approaching his room.
His body froze when he felt Seul making a slight move in his embrace. On the bright side, she’s not awake however her face was buried deeply in his chest. The heavy lump on his throat caused his breath to hitch.
Ji Seul, what are you.
“Taehyung-ah, are you asleep” Taehyung snapped out his thought, and brought Seul’s body closer to him. He shut his eyes tight pretended to sleep with hope they wouldn’t get caught by their manager today. Not today, they couldn’t risk losing Seul.
Sejin twisted the door knob, poking his head inside. He squeezed his eyes to adjust to the darkness “Guess, he is asleep. That was fast” he mumbled. Taehyung’s mind overloaded with negative thoughts and his heart thumped crazily that he swore the eerie silence in his room adding the tension. The sound of the footsteps sounded so close yet unclear. He was sure it was just few steps closer from his bed. Like a reflex, Taehyung tightened his arm around Seul’s keeping her close.
Exasperating a soft sigh, he was relieved when the sound of the footsteps faded away. The soft slam came from the door convinced Taehyung that his manager had left the room, yet he did not want risk getting caught, so he stayed like a statue for few minutes. Taehyung grinned upon hearing Sejin’s faint voice behind the door “Park Jimin, I told you to sleep. Why are you still standing there?” Sejin frowned.
Jimin cleared his throat awkwardly “Is..Tae asleep?”
“Yes, his room is dark, and I bet he is asleep”
“D-d-dark what?” Jimin continued to curse something vulgar in his head. After finding out Seul was in Taehyung’s room he couldn’t help but to worry. It triggered his protective instinct and jealousy. He couldn’t let his guard down just because Taehyung is his best friend even though Tae was never vocal about his feelings for Seul, his man’s instinct could not be wrong. Something bloomed whenever they were together.
The older guy snapped him out from his deep thought “What is wrong with you? Go sleep and stop worrying about Tae. Clock is ticking Jiminie, you don’t want to miss even an hour worth of sleep” he exclaimed.
“Fine, I am sleeping” his lower lips puckered out of habit.
“I will be here around 10, make sure everyone is ready by then” Jimin nodded obediently and threw a final glance at Taehyung’s door. Everything will be fine, Jimin convinced his racing heart.  
 ----------------
Groggily, Seul forced her heavy lids to open and that when she realized the unusual warmth behind her. Seul squinted her eyes one last time in order for her foggy brain to function properly. A small light from the curtain illuminated the dark room but was not enough for Seul to get a clear view of it. On top of all, she was beyond relief that her outfits were still intact, remain untouchable. Meaning no funny business happened. At least, she was not kidnapped by some sasaeng fans, she hoped.
‘I swear I was in the living room watching Hwarang’ she grew frustrated of her failure in retrieving her memory. Seul couldn’t recall whether the boys were back home or not. Shrugging her unimportant thought away, Seul fisted the sheets under her gathering her courage to face the individual behind her.
Seul, move slowly don’t wake up the tiger.
Shifting under the sheet, she changed her position slightly to face Taehyung. In 3,2,1 she was ready to see whoever beside her but to her surprise, someone was cradling her head halting her earlier intention to catch the culprit.
“Seul, you awake?” his voice trailed off. She recognized that voice.
Seul touched his hand “Jungkook?” she whispered in daze.
His low yet squeaky chuckle made her smile “Yes, it is me. Come on let’s get up quietly. We don’t want to wake Tae hyung” Jungkook stroked his hand down to her waist, slowly sweeping her off from the bed.
Setting Seul down on the ground, she inquired “Tae? I am in his room. How?” Jungkook let out another adorable giggle, embracing her tight. “You fell asleep while watching hyung’s drama. Let’s talk outside” while keeping Seul in his embrace, they exited Taehyung’s room at ease.
She pulled away making an abrupt stop facing the giggly maknae, why was he in good mood today. “Tell me why I am in Tae’s room? I thought I was kidnapped!” she pursed her lips in annoyance.
“Sejin hyung was here, so we had no choice but to hide you”
“Hiding me in Taehyung’s room? How clever” she wheezed.
“Then you wish to be in my room instead?” Jungkook look amused as playful smirk spread on his handsome face.
She squirmed under his intense gaze “I didn’t mean it that way, you could wake me up. I can hide in the closet and leave afterwards” he sent a disapproval glare at her way.
“No way we are making you walk alone at that time, now stop complaining” he took few steps forward, pulling the sulky girl into another tight hug. Jungkook nuzzled the top of her head, exhaling a low sigh “I miss you” he murmured.
Her heart did the weird dance again, “You woke up early today, I thought you were not an early riser” she wrapped her arms around him, returning the hug with equal passion. “You think I can sleep knowing you’re sleeping on the same bed as Tae hyung?” he said sulkily.
Seul giggled “Are you jealous? Then, I blame it on you for letting Tae got into the way” her tease making the visible frown on his forehead two times thicker. She looked up “Aigoo, you may develop wrinkles at this age” her hand smoothed his eyebrows, giving it a soft caress along the shape.
Closing his eyes with a soft hum, Jungkook let himself drown under Seul’s magic touch “You are losing your baby fat again. I don’t like that” she gave his cheek a soft stroke with a slight frown.
“Don’t worry I will earn that back after our promotion ended. Besides, I had a good breakfast every day thanks to you. Did you come late at night for your work just to prepare those meal for us?” he pecked her fingers, interlacing it with his.
“You guys are barely home so I thought it is wise to change my caretaking schedule a little. On the bright side, I can prepare breakfast for you guys. I bet Jin had no time to prepare proper food for all of you, I don’t want to wear him out” her eyes glimmered in concern. The mere thought of filling seven empty stomach washed away the worries in her.
Jungkook protested “But that’s mean you will be walking home alone, and it is not safe”
“About that, my mom made Hoon picked me up from work every day. Don’t worry, I will be fine. Worry about yourself, you need to eat healthily. Stop skipping meals” she cringed. “I saw your Vlive, all of you look dead tired. And, I am sorry I couldn’t make it to your Wings tour last week. I had to fill in for Sera” she sighed.
His hand skimmed, featherlight, over her shoulders “It is okay, it is just the opening tour this year, I will make sure you attend the next one. Hobi hyung and Jin hyung were not happy that you couldn’t make it to our concert. However since you bribed them with food the day after, they lowkey claimed that it was okay for you not to attend as long as you prepared yummy food to make it up to them” she chuckled at their silliness.
“As expected, how easy it was to persuade those two. Don’t remind me the long ass text that they sent to me showing off their protest and resentment” Seul’s face scrunched a little at the vivid memories. Jungkook laughed along and the couple continued their conversation in the kitchen. Seul reheat the food for the boys to savour when they woke up with Jungkook’s help.
“I think I need to go before your manager come. Oh, say hi to everyone” she hung her apron carefully and gathered her belongings. Meanwhile, Jungkook continued to sulk behind, “Can’t you stay for breakfast? It is still early, hyung will be here around 10” his voice was a little more than a whisper but in cutesy way.
She flashed him a soft smile “I can’t Jungkook maybe next time. I have an errand to run” he watched her back as she made her way to the entrance. “I want to meet you again before we fly off to America next month” Jungkook leaned against the wall with one hand inside his pocket.
She saw the disappointment in his eyes, so she walked up to him. Dazed Jungkook set his eyes on Seul as the girl tiptoed a little giving a soft peck on his lips “There. I will see you around, don’t miss me too much” a sweet rush of embarrassment coursed through Jungkook.
“O..kay..” his eyes sparkled causing Seul to chuckle. Jungkook might be a little blunt in showing his affection towards her, but whenever she initiated the skinship first, the guy would turn into a total baby.
Seul was about to push the door getting ready to leave but only to be greeted by Sejin’s confused face. She felt an extreme fear in her system, was she caught for real now? Fuck, she muttered.
“Who are you?” he pushed the door wider to see Jungkook stood frozen behind Seul with an extremely disturbed face.
“Hyung…You are urm.. early?” his voice broke into a small shriek.
Quirking his eyebrows, the older guy stepped inside closing the door behind him carefully “You have a long explanation to do Jeon Jungkook. To the lounge now. I want everyone in the room. 5 minutes” his voice was rough and Seul felt like pissing in her jeans.
Seul swallowed a heavy lump on her throat “When I said everyone, that includes you Miss” he pushed the glass back on the bridge of his nose, leaving astounded Jungkook and Seul behind. Jungkook made eye contact with Seul and they exchanged looks of panic and questions.
   This work belongs to  Chimswae © 2020. All Rights Reserved
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agataroman · 3 years
Text
One Moment Changes Everything (Part 2)
A/N: Okay, part 2, enjoy
Pairing: Jackson (GOT7) x Reader
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When you must wake up for breakfast because it ends at ten o’clock. After a concert… Never imagined it like this. How I didn’t want to get out of bed.
But then again, I will have breakfast, will return to my room and sleep all day long.
That woke me up a little bit, so I got up and prepared. Almost nobody was having a breakfast (it was 9:30). I had time to order my thoughts. I still couldn’t believe that I saw them. Like… OMG!!!
And I even talked to Jackson Wang. Maybe for less than five minutes, but even that counts. I am happy that I got tickets for fansign too. I felt like I could fly, like gravitation wasn’t working on me.
I decided to stay whole day in my room. I can go explore LA tomorrow, the only free day I have, before I have to go back to my country. When I got back, I just fell on bed fully clothed. I even fell asleep for a moment.
When I woke up I still had some time, so I looked at my Got7Amino. The concert was yesterday, not even 24 hours ago and there were blogs about me and Jackson. My photo was nowhere and I sighed with relieve.
The messages where almost the same. Mostly speculated about us. „How do they know each other?“ „Was that only a fan or someone Jackson knows more?“ And more similar sentences. Luckily nobody knew. I think that after today, someone will know my face. I was little scared about that. What would other ahgases think about me? What if someone found me on SNS?
All those thoughts crossed my mind. But then I thought of Jackson. If he can endure it, so can I. Even if it will take long to get used to it.
I really had nothing to do. Again I played games on phone, because I didn’t want to take my laptop with me… What if I lost it somewhere? Rather not. So I was mostly playing games. Or reading some fanfics. I won’t even tell what fanfics… I would be so embarrassed if anyone knew.
Finally it was time for me to go on fansign. I’ve never been there, so I don’t know how it will go. I dressed and checked if I didn’t forget the ticket and went. It was held near the stadium so I already knew the way.
I didn’t want to come on time, because I wanted to talk to Jackson again and I thought I could do that only after it ends. But I got there only an hour after the start and I had another hour and half. So I found myself a place to sit and I waited. The members didn’t notice me but that didn’t matter.
It was kind of fun. Sometimes it was little under because Got7 had to sign someone the album and didn’t have time to pay us attention. But those funny times, I can’t. One of the cutest things there was when Jackson gave Bambam a piggyback. Also Jaebum put on this silly headband with big leopard ears. Kyaa!!! I couldn’t. When you see it on picture it’s not as powerful as when you see it up-close.
I am telling you. Why does it always end so soon. Like 15 minutes from now, but still. So I stepped up and went for my signing. First I went to Yugyeom. He was in all black and had flowers in his hair. How can such devil look so angelic? Tell me!
„Hello,“ I said.
„Annyeong,“ he replied. I put album on table and he signed it.  He didn’t recognize me. Lucky. I wanted to be recognized only by Jackson. And maybe Mark as he saw me already.
„The flowers are pretty,“ I said. He smiled at me.
„Thank you.“ I bowed and went to next person.
Bambam. He is fashion killer! Come on, he is always so perfectly clothed, fully in black like Yugyeom. And he had black cat‘s ears!
Instead of greeting I dabbed… I couldn’t help it. And he dabbed back. Both of us laughed.
„Where you yesterday on concert?“ he asked me.
„Sure thing Bam-oppa,“ I smiled wider.
„I’m really your oppa?“ he couldn’t believe it.
„I’m two years younger.“ He just nodded and signed my album. When I went to next member, Bambam sent me a hand heart!
The next person was Jinyoung. I knew that he heard my conversation with Bambam, he was judging me with his eyes. I just put my finger on my lips, I didn’t want anyone know… yet. We didn’t talk, he just signed album and on the way he gave me high-five.
The forth person in row was Youngjae.
„What’s up!“ his usual greeting.
„Hi,“ I waved. I really couldn’t do anything more. With the flower in his hair he looked so innocent! He smiled at me wide and we handshaked.
The next one was tougher. Im „Chic & Sexy“ Jaebum. And why did he have to have expression like that! I really wanted to fan myself. What a pity he didn’t have the ears anymore. But we know how he is with these kinds of things. He simply waved at me.
„Hi,” I managed weak hello. As I said, I am usually shy in front of people, more likely people I don’t know (personally).
I felt little better with the next person. Our cute visual Mark.
„Hey, you’re the girl from yesterday,” he said. I knew he would recognize me.
„Yep, that’s me.” I smiled.
„How did you even meet?“ Suddenly someone put their arm around my shoulders. I jumped in fear and scremed a little bit. When I turned to see the person, it was Jackson.
„Dammit Jackson, don’t do that! I am even worse than you when scared.”
,,Hey what do you mean by that?“
,,Nothing,“ I said while trying to look innocent.
,,Au, you hurt my feelings,“ he pretended to be hurt.
,,Oh don't cry my little baby,“ I made childish noises. Suddenly Mark started laughing.
,,Be quiet Mark.“
,,Sorry but it was kind of funny. So how did you meet?“
,,Now that's funny story. I was coming for concert when I saw this little lost child. I went to help him and what didn't I saw… It was Jackson,“ I said with laugher.
,,(Y/N),“ Jackson said with dangerous voice. I started to run around the table and Jackson was right behind me. Everyone was definitely watching us now. I looked back to confirm he way still behind me. When I turned back Mark was standing there and I had to stop.
Suddenly Jackson was next to me and he kissed me!! It was on cheek near lips but I froze and no thoughts where coming. I was blank. I couldn’t think! Standing there looking who knows where. Someone was waving their hand in front of my face, but I didn’t pay attention to that.
,,I think we broke her,“ said Jackson. That woke me up.
,,Jackson!“ I shouted. I advanced on him and he was going back. Suddenly he put a mic in front of my mouth.
,,Sing,“ he said. Yeah sure, I thought sarcastically.
,,But I can't sing! Plus I am tone-deaf!“
,,So what?“ OK now I wanted to kill him.
,,Do you want her to sing?“ he asked the audience. Everyone started to shout. Wow thanks guys. Maybe it was the kiss or I don't know, but I thought whatever and took the mic.
,,OK guys I'm gonna try it, but I am telling you, you will be wishing you said no.“ So I decided to sing this one song Genie in a bottle by Dove Cameron. So I started singing.
When I finished everyone started clapping.
,,Wasn't so bad,“ commented Jackson. I blushed. I knew that I sing bad even if I like singing and I sing all the time, but…
,,I am not that good.“
,,You were brilliant!“ Jackson was jumping around me and others where noding.
,,Well thanks guys.“ At this moment a woman came on stage and said GOT7 should say goodbye. Everyone was sad. Again it had to end. Jackson gestured to stay there so I went to the background to wait. I really couldn’t think anymore. So many things happened today that… oh never mind. Suddenly someone was hugging me.
,,I don’t want you to go,“ said Jackson. I think he felt same as me. I was so sad to go away and probably never meeting again. At least not anytime soon. He released me and I saw hope.
,,Give me your phone.“ I took my phone out of a pocket and gave it to him. I didn’t know what he was doing. But he explained it.
,,I will call you as soon as we arrive home.“ My eyes wide-opened. Did he said what he said?
,,OK,“ I said still trying to figure it out. He returned my phone to me and hugged me again. This time Mark came too and other came closer.
,,We're going to miss you,“ said Jackson.
,,Definitely. Yesterday he wouldn't shut up about you,“ said this time Mark.
,,Be quiet Mark.“ Now they really had to go. I released them.
,,I am going to miss you too.“ Tears where coming down my face. Jackson leaned closer and kissed me again on cheek. They than turned and went backstage.
I knew most ahgases stayed there so it will definitely end up on net, but I didn’t care. Right now I was trying not to cry and fall on my knees. To hotel I came like in a dream. Didn’t know how I got into my room. But I didn’t care. I fell on bed and cried myself into sleep.
A/N: part 2 is done, next and last part 3 coming up
Part 1
Part 3
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ssunsxt · 4 years
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Could you do eqg villians scale please? Maybe with such criteria as design, motivation, charisma etc...which ones are poorly written in your opinion? Perhaps some villains got the redemtion arc undeservedly? What do you think?
WHEW THANK GOD OKAY. This is going to be LONG so I’ll put it in a read more. TLDR at the end.
EVERYONE saw this coming but-- Wallflower Blush is the WORST villain in terms of.... the entire criteria you want me to rate them on. 
Her design is bland and boring, which I understand is the point bc she’s supposed to blend into the background and not stand out (which I mean, arguably gets her some points for the fact her design works for what it was intended for), but she’s just.... so boring to look at.
Motivation was HORSE shit. I’ve talked about this from heaven to earth and back again. @mlprarepairartsies​ made a really good post about her motivations which you can find here. I just think she’s selfish and likes to blame others. I definitely don’t think she deserved the “redemption” she got considering she didn’t really apologise for what she put Sunset through. Like, yes okay maybe she apologised for using the stone but like........ you tore away all of Sunset’s hard work, forcing her to be and feel completely alone despite all of the hardships she had already faced and the countless times she put herself in danger to save the school. She completely disregarded all of the good Sunset did because she didn’t reach out to HER specifically? Bitch I’ll floor it
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Juniper Montage isn’t the best villain, but she’s still better and (arguably) more justified than Wallflower. Her motivations were shallow-- but at least she saw the GROUP at fault for what happened to her. 
Her design is cute. I really loved her little film-reel hair ties! They were so cute. I also really love her personality. She has a little bit of attitude, which is something I REALLY love in a character. Even before the girls got her fired, she still had her attitude when talking about how her uncle wouldn’t give her a chance at the role she wanted. Not even at her uncle though! Just the situation as a whole. It shows she clearly has things she wants and gets mad when things don’t work out for her. 
Her apology seemed genuine too. She’s genuinely just.... a girl who finds it hard to make friends and thought that in order to make friends she had to be able to impress them-- and what better way than through fame? What makes her endearing is that she felt like she didn’t deserve forgiveness after what she’d done, too! She genuinely did feel guilty about everything! 
She was just really fun to watch.
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Vignette McFucking Valencia. THIS bitch.
In terms of her design? I think she’s probably the most aesthetic-- but that’s the whole point, isnt it? So that gives her more points
she’s just a CLASS A dumbass and honestly I think its really brave how she didnt even give a shit about being called out ayusdifhjkndf she was just consistently an asshole and didn’t give a shit. she didn’t really get a redemption which I really liked because it wouldn’t really have made sense with her personality for her to just be like “damn... youre right”
she’s a narcissist and I’m here for it. she’s not a likeable character, which is why I love her so much as a villain because..... theres people just like her in the real world
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SPEAKING OF PEOPLE JUST LIKE HER IN THE REAL WORLD
Cinch. What a fucking asshole. What a great villain. A person in a position of power who uses her influence to blackmail and manipulate people into doing what she wants. How absolutely mouthwatering is that as a villain trope.
Her design just radiates big bitch energy. It really fits with her personality. She just LOOKS like an asshole.
She was an asshole through and through, too !! She didn’t get a redemption! She even LOST her position of power!! So thats MAD s*xy
She’s the kind of villain that you see on the screen and you just yell BOO, so I think she does her job very well
(also im not gonna count Twilight as a villain bc... she was LITERALLY the victim of this movie)
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okay so the top 3!!!
GLORIOSA. DAISY.
Her design is so pretty. She looks like someone I could have a cup of hot cocoa with. Someone I can trust. 
Her motivation was really noble, honestly. She just wanted to save the camp she was raised on. One of the last things she has left of her parents. How the hell can you fault her for that?
From the little glimpse of the real her you see outside of her “camp counsellor” act, she just seems like a really chilled out and normal person. She puts others first, works hard to ensure peoples happiness, and she just allowed magic to take advantage of her weakness (her desperation to save her camp) and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that! She’s a character you can sympathise and empathise with. Someone who was in a bad situation and just wanted so desperately to fix it without stressing out her younger brother. She didn’t want to make him worry (which she did in the end but she tried her best!!!)
I just really love Gloriosa and I don’t talk about her enough
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bada bing bada boom everyone saw this coming. THE DAZZLINGS.
Look. They do evil well. They had one goal and they stuck to it. They wanted power and at the first opportunity they got? They JUMPED on it. The DEDICATION. Was their motivation dumb? Not really. They’re evil and “wanting to take over the world” seems pretty evil to me?
Their designs are really nice (except aria what the FUCK are you wearing sweetie). They’re so fucking charismatic that I’m actually MAD they lost the battle of the bands!! Recount the votes!!! they deserved the win !!!
on top of that, they had literally the best soundtrack for their movie. 
They each have such distinct personalities and their dynamic with each other as well as how they interact with other characters and the world around them is just..... so entertaining to watch. Adagio is snarky as hell and sarcasm drips off of her. Aria is just this loser who likes fashion and has an attitude. I can vibe. Sonata is just.... Sonata. I needn’t say more. Absolute dumbasses are my type.
Even after they lose their powers they just... decided they actually really liked singing. And even then, they still have a fucking attitude!! They didn’t thank sunset and the girls for “opening their eyes” to life without magic or thank them for making them think introspectively. They literally tell sunset to get a life and drive off in a fucking van. That’s SO funny. Literally no other villain is doing it like them.
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idk if this is a shock but... Sunset Shimmer is my favorite EQG villain.
Her goal was power, but to me, I don’t think it was power that she ever really wanted. She just wanted to prove to Celestia that she was great and wanted Celestia to appreciate her for the talent she had. She just wanted to feel wanted and appreciated. 
She was ambitious and selfish, self-serving and mean, yes! She was! But she always knew what to do to achieve her goals. She was manipulative, and so so smart with how she went about things. The students and even the teachers were fully aware of the kind of person Sunset was, but still she “ruled the school”. The POWER she has.
She’s just so very... human, and I think that’s ultimately why I love Sunset so much. She finds out the one person she wanted validation from the most actually replaced her-- took her destiny from her. Of course she’d be hurt! Of course she’d feel even worse about herself. All she cared about was Celestia and Celestia’s validation, and to Sunset, wouldn’t it appear that the princess-- someone she has spent every moment of her life thinking about-- didn’t even spare her a second thought? Imagine how that would feel
She bluffs, and lies, and does all she can to keep up this facade of unshakeable confidence; but in all actually, Sunset is just so insecure. She thinks so little of herself. And despite all of her hardwork, she’s still defeated. She’s proven that there are things more powerful than ambition and talent. And the first opportunity she receives in order to right her wrongs? She takes it. She jumps on every chance she gets to be a better person. She works hard to be better and do better. 
And that’s what makes her such a likeable character; because even after she’s redeemed, her personality doesn’t completely change. She’s just using that energy towards other things-- better things. And it pays off for her.
You love watching her grow into the person she is at the end of the show. Seeing her grow into herself without worrying about impressing others or proving herself. You just feel so proud of how far she’s come. That’s what makes her such a good villain.
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so this was LONG as hell but TLDR;
The scale (from worst to best) goes Wallflower  —> Juniper  —> Vignette  —> Cinch  —> Gloriosa  —> The dazzlings  —> Sunset
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