#im more nonbinary than anything anyways n i always have been

[tamagotchikgs]

the constant internal struggle of do i want 2 take T or do i just wish i were a cis man and ill be miserable either way

[orionangeline]

Tfw you're daydreaming about being in an interview for a book you never got around to writing and now you really want to read it but oops it doesn't exist but at least the author seems cool

[reidgraygubler]

sunflowers, daisies, lilacs, dahlias (spencer reid/reader)

Title: sunflowers, daisies, lilacs, dahlias

Requested: yes, was a request someone sent to @imagining-in-the-margins​, but I took it of her hands :) (So i get this is sorta hard to do but i was wondering if you could write a spencer x nonbinary (gender-neutral pronouns) reader where reader isn’t out to the team yet but spencer finds out somehow and the reader is afraid he’ll reject them but instead he confesses his feelings and just starts info dumping about third genders in other cultures and the roots of binary america, etc. just like fluffy and accepting. once again, i get it if you don’t want to/can’t but that would be awesome)

Couple: spencer reid/non-binary!reader (they/them pronouns)

Category: fluff

Content Warning: swearing (if any), misgendering, usual criminal minds case work stuff, bi!spencer, lgbt+ history lesson, platonic cuddling (or is it?), kissing (not platonic), Doctor Who season 12 spoilers (weird, I know), afab!reader

Word Count: 4,110

Summary: reader comes out as non-binary to their best friend, Spencer, after they notice he changes the pronouns he uses to talk about them and after the team misgenders them.

A/N: pom (aka @imagining-in-the-margins​) posted this in her discord and said if someone had any ideas for this, we could have it. and i loved the request so i took it off her hands. im also non-binary and only out to a few friends, so this piece is dear to my heart. also, i wrote reader as afab, since that’s also me, but also the request says that reader isn’t out to the team yet, and i had to give reader a gender. so im sorry about that. that’s where the mis-gendering comes in. spencer’s nickname for reader is bumblebee when they’re friends, but once they start dating it’s honeybee… bc reader is…  enbee… thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!

{***}{***}{***}

It was a new day at work. A new day, a new me… Kinda, not really. It’s still old me. I’m just trying to figure out the new me. I think that makes sense. It makes sense to me, so that’s all that matters, I think.

Maybe today was the day I came out to the team as Non-Binary. That’d probably help my feeling of garbage. Not even my own family knew about my little secret. So that’s been something I’ve seriously been thinking about, telling everyone that I was Non-binary and preferred they/them pronouns. 

I kept my head low as I stepped off the elevator and onto the floor of the BAU. The good news is, people weren’t rushing around like I was partly expecting them to be. The bad news is, when I got to my desk, there was a stack of files, waiting to be looked over. And the unfortunate part was, I wouldn’t get to get through half of them, because something told me there was a current case we had to go on. 

That something being Emily Prentiss standing outside her office, looking for everyone on the team. I looked up at her with a pout as she nodded towards the conference room. I looked back at the stack of files before grabbing my go bag and going up to the conference room.

Everyone was already there, waiting for me. Although, I was usually late, in a sensible fashion. So I quickly took my seat beside Spencer and remained quiet as Penelope and Emily told us about the case.

{***}{***}{***}

“We can go to the most recent victim’s house, interview the siblings,” Spencer spoke up as we both walked up to Emily. I looked up at him and nodded, silently agreeing that I could go with. It’s not like I had anything better to do anyways. Tara and Luke were at the newest crime scene. David and Matt were with the ME. And Emily was about to go interrogate the suspect. So, going with Spencer would give me something to do. 

“She’ll have to conduct the interview,” Emily looked up from the file she was reading and right at me. I looked down, away from anyone who was possibly looking at me. Getting mis-gendered was something I was used to, by now anyways. But, for some reason, this time it really bothered me. Emily doesn’t know, it’s fine. It’s mostly my fault anyways. And, I guess it bothered Spencer too, because the expression on his face shifted from normal to… annoyed.

“Of course, they can do the interview. They’re the most like the victim,” Spencer looked at Emily before looking back at me. I looked at him and smiled softly. It was more of a nervous smile than anything else. A change, and correction, in pronoun… I hadn’t exactly told anyone that I preferred different pronouns, I had honestly gotten used to the unfortunate misgendering.

“I can do it, I’m perfectly capable of it,” I smiled at Spencer then over at Emily. So much for a change.

“Then that’s settled, she’ll do it,” Emily looked up at Spencer and smiled before allowing us to leave. I dropped my shoulders as I glanced at Spencer, who was glaring daggers at Emily. He wasn’t usually one to glare at his superiors, especially Emily. 

“We should get going, don’t you think,” I whispered as I looked up at Spencer. He finally looked down at me and nodded. “And, you can do the interview, if you want. I get that I’m a lot like the victim’s sister. But, you do interviews better than me,” I laughed and shook my head. 

“We can do it together. That’s the only way you can get better at interviewing,” he returned the laughter before following beside me. 

“That’s true,” I smiled at him. 

{***}{***}{***}

“I know we always do this, but thanks for letting me stay the night after hard cases,” I looked over at Spencer as he got in his car. I readjusted the grip on my bag as I looked away from Spencer.

“Of course, sleeping over at someone’s house after a case makes it easier to relax, especially after hard cases,” he looked over at me with a smile, “We can order Chinese food if you want,”  he added as he looked back at the road.  

“Yeah, I think I’d like that,” I nodded with a smile. Sometime between solving the last case, and the jet landing I gained the courage to bring up what happened before the interview. You know, the whole they/them thing… With Spencer. I still don’t know how he knew to change my pronouns. 

He was talking about something, it sounded like an episode of Doctor Who.  I sort of felt bad about that too, because I was hardly listening. I was one of the only few people who actually watched Doctor Who with him, and thoroughly enjoyed his commentary. 

“And then the Doctor, who, have I mentioned is a woman now, is in fact the Timeless Child. Did you know that?” He glanced at me as he went on. Again, I felt bad because I wasn’t totally paying attention. “Of course you knew that, we watched the episode together,” he continued to ramble about the episode.

“Spencer,” I spoke, my voice just loud enough for him to hear.

“Mhm, what?” he glanced over at me for a quick second. I looked at him, my mouth opening and closing a few times before actually saying what I was thinking. Which was...

“How did you know?” I asked, my voice a bit of a whisper. I was a little bit scared. How did he know? Sure, Spencer knows everything. But I’m not exactly… Out to the team, let alone Spencer. I don’t think I told him. 

“How did I know what, Bumblebee?” Spencer glanced over at me for a brief second. I sighed deeply as I looked over at him. 

“You used 'they'… When you and Emily were talking about me and the interrogation… You used 'they' and 'them' when you talked about me… How’d you know? I haven’t told anyone…” I whispered as I looked over at him. He stayed silent for a long time. I wasn’t too sure what he was thinking, but it made me very nervous. 

“I saw you at the library with a book about gender/sexuality history and science… And I saw you looking at a non-binary/gender non-conforming forum the other day. So, I connected the dots,” Spencer looked over at me as he pulled to a stop at the red light. I swallowed roughly as I looked at him. “I didn’t mean to off-”

“You didn’t offend me, Spence,” I whispered and shook my head before dropping my gaze from him. My fingers fiddled with the seatbelt across my lap. I could feel my heart going a million miles an hour, and no matter how hard I tried to calm it… nothing worked. “I just… I haven’t used the words out loud before… I’ve haven't told anyone… I mean, I’ve just figured it out myself,” I shrugged again. I glanced at him as he started going again. “I’ve always known I didn’t really identify as… Ya know… And I guess just recently I finally put a name to it,” I sighed as I pressed my head into the headrest. Spencer glanced at me, again. He was obviously trying to keep his eyes on the road, but he was very concerned about our conversation.

“You’ve never said it out loud? Or told anyone?” He asked, clarifying what I had just said. I swallowed roughly and nodded.

“Yeah, I just…” I stopped, letting my words trail off. My thoughts ran wild. If I just said that I was non-binary, it’d make my life easier, I’d be so much happier. So, why haven’t I just come out and said it? “So, say it now. It’s just me,” Spencer whispered as he looked over at me for the briefest second. My heart stopped with his words, and suddenly my mind was quiet. “No one else to hear."

“What?” I spoke, my voice a breathless whisper. I looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. 

“Only if you want to. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to do.” Spencer’s voice was soft as he spoke. I looked over at him, feeling my stomach do an anxious flip.

“What if it changes the way you think about me?” I asked, feeling my throat tighten up around the words. Out of all of the friends that I had, Spencer was the only one I didn’t want to lose. In a weird way, I felt like he understood me. Like we were both the outcasts of the team, for our different reasons. 

“Why would that change the way I think of you?” Spencer looked up at me and I shrugged. I stared at him, feeling my face twist up in confusion. Even his face had some confusion on it. 

“I don’t know. People usually…” My words trailed off again, not knowing what I was exactly wanting to say to him. “You’re not mad at me? Or hate me or anything…? Right…?” I asked, my voice wavering slightly in fear. Fear of what? I was scared he would resent me. It wouldn’t have been the first, or last, time someone resented me. So, why would I expect him to not resent me? 

“Why would I hate you? Because you’re finally more comfortable with yourself? Or want to be more comfortable with yourself?” Spencer looked at me as he furrowed his brows. I looked down at my lap and shrugged. “You still haven’t said it, but we’re talking about it like you did,” he pointed out. I dropped my shoulders as I looked over at him. 

“You really want me to say it,” I laughed dryly. Spencer smiled at me and shrugged.

“Only if you want to. Just think about how much better you’ll feel,” he offered. I looked down at my lap and sighed.

“Yeah, yeah, okay,” I looked back up at him and smiled, “I’m non-binary.” I could feel a certain weight get lifted off my shoulders as I looked at him. Spencer also had a genuine smile on his lips as he looked at me. Like, he also seemed happy with my words.

 “There’s nothing wrong with that, you know,” Spencer smiled at me as he pulled into the parking lot of his apartment building. I glanced at him before laughing. “I’m being serious,” he chuckled lightly.

“I sure hope there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re the one who encouraged me to say it!” I laughed as I unbuckled. Spencer returned the laughter before looking over at me.

“Then, why do you care what the team thinks?” Spencer asked as he searched for his apartment keys. “Their opinion shouldn’t matter. It’s your life,” he shrugged and looked up at me once he finally found his keys.  

“Everyone on the team is all my friends and all my family…” I whispered as I looked over at him, “I don’t know what everyone will think,” I knew he wanted me to say it out loud to the team, but I was avoiding it. It’s not that I’m not ready. I just don’t want him to think differently of me.

“When has anyone on the team thought bad of you, Bumblebee?” Spencer asked again before parking the car. I swallowed roughly and looked back down at my lap. Of course, when I actually cut my hair short the first time… I had gotten a horrible haircut and everyone commented on it. “No one’s going to think anything bad about you if you come out,” he reassured. I sighed deeply as I looked towards the ground.

“Yeah, but I don’t care about them Spencer,” I rolled my eyes. I rolled my eyes because even though I do care what the team thinks, I think I care more about what Spencer thinks about me. But, I didn’t want to tell him that.

“Then, why were you so worried about it,” Spencer looked over at me before getting out of the car. I stayed in the car for a moment, silent with my thoughts. He’s got a point though. Why was I so worried about it? Of course, the team was my family. I don’t think I could risk losing the team for being… well, me. Maybe Spencer was right. Who am I kidding? Spencer’s always right. About everything. Maybe I should just tell the team… I’d feel a lot better.

I stayed quiet as we walked into the apartment building. In fact, we were both silent. Which was a rarity in our friendship; one of us was always talking, and it was always Spencer. He always had something to say. I wondered what he was thinking about in that head of his. Until I didn’t have to wonder...

“Native American people have a third gender, generally called two-spirit, where the person takes on roles more or less attributed to the opposite sex or both sexes,” Spencer suddenly started an info dump. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I read this exact thing in a book not too long ago. But, it meant so much to me that he wanted to tell me this.

“When europeans came along, they came with the strict gender binary rooted in Puritism, which put heavy emphasis on community and the importance of procreational (heterosexual) marriage within,” he paused to glance at me, probably to make sure I was still listening. And I was. There would be nothing to stop me from listening to him. 

 “Once the colonizers became a country after the american revolution, they wanted to get as far away from britain as possible. Part of this came with separating themselves from the effeminate man of Britain, whom they saw as feminine and dainty. As a result, they made the American Man, who is basically Teddy Roosevelt in that he is rugged, bold, strong, brutish, daring, and able to survive on the frontier and provide for his family,” he continued as he unlocked the door to his apartment. It was nice to be in a familiar place that felt like home, and felt safe.

“In comparison, the woman was supposed to be the American Housewife who stayed at home, cooked the meals, and raised the children. Thus, the American binary,” Spencer continued his info dump, clearly not knowing he was talking outloud. 

I just stared at Spencer with the utmost adoration in my eyes and face. A small smile grew on my lips as he continued to ramble and info dump about stuff I was newly introduced to. I don’t know why I didn’t tell him sooner, I’m sure he would have been a big help. “That’s very interesting, Spencer,” I smiled at him and cocked my head to my shoulder. Spencer looked at me, a slight panicked look in his eye. 

“I’m… I’m sorry, was I rambling?” He stopped talking and looked at me after a moment of him talking. I shook my head, silently telling him he wasn’t rambling, even though he totally was. At this point we had parted ways, but still held the conversation between rooms, and across his apartment, him being in the kitchen while I stayed in the living room.

“Anyways… I could continue going on about it all. How WW2 influenced the LGBT community and how Nuclear Families messed it all up too,” he spoke before stepping out of the kitchen and leading me to his bedroom. 

“I’m sorry, what?” I looked back at him with furrowed eyebrows. I was honestly surprised with that tiny tidbit of information. “Go on,” I raised a brow as I looked at him. I got comfortable on the bed while I waited for him.

“Yeah! The advent of urban areas provided the perfect place for sexuality and gender identity expression,” he continued talking as he stepped into the bathroom to change, and even continued while in the bathroom, “Many single people suddenly began moving from rural farms with family and religion to urban apartments on their own or with someone of the same identity/gender/sex,” he finally concluded before stepping out of the bathroom. I looked at him and cocked my head to my shoulder. I didn’t have anything to say after he rambled on, so we both stayed silent as we got comfortable in bed. 

“How do you know so much about gender identity and the LGBT community?” I asked, turning to face him more. Spencer looked at me with a nervous smile before looking out to the blanket spread out over us. 

“Oh, I, uh… I did a lot of research when I saw you in the library… And, after I saw you on the forum,” Spencer looked at me and nodded. I could sense that he was lying, and he knew that I could sense it. So, I raised an eyebrow.

“I’m sure this is the exact reason,” I smiled before shifting down the bed to get comfortable, “No other reason?” I looked up at him. 

“Nope, no other reason,” he looked down at his book before shaking his head. I could tell there was definitely something, and I could tell he wanted to tell me. But, I won’t force it out of him, just like how he didn’t force it out of me.

“Well, if you have something to tell me… I won’t force it outta you,” I looked over at him with a smile. Spencer glanced at me before grabbing for a book on his nightstand. I shifted down the bed and looked at my phone. “No one’s going to think anything bad about you,” I glanced at him again, repeating the exact things he said to me early in the evening. Spencer glared at me before looking back in his book.

“You’re the worst,” 

“You’re worse than me, Spence,” I laughed as I looked at my phone. I grinned as I browsed random social media. “It’s okay, I get it,” I shrugged before falling silent. 

“I suppose it’s only fair,” he spoke out loud after a moment of silence. I looked up at him, watching as he shifted in his seat. He closed his book before looking down at me, “I guess I’ve been in the same boat as you for a while… Not knowing what anyone would think if I came out, fearing that they’d hate me or judge me,”

“Spencer, you’re the most loved person on the team. No one would ever hate you or judge you,” I sat up before turning to look at him. Spencer looked up at me and nodded. I’m glad we could both agree on that. If anyone hated Spencer Reid, I can guarantee that they’d have a whole fleet of FBI agents on their ass. “You can trust me with anything, Spencer,” I whispered before reaching out for his hands. He looked down at where our hands sat before cocking his head to the side.

“I already trust you more than anyone on the team,” he smiled and chuckled with a nod, “I’ve never told anyone except for one person,” he whispered as he looked up at me.

“That’s okay,” I shrugged as I looked at him. 

“I’m bisexual,” he whispered, his eyes dropping away from my. I stared at him, taking a deep breath. A small smile tugged on the corner of my lips as a worried look grew on Spencer’s. 

“Was that so bad?” I whispered as I fell forward to give him a hug. Spencer laughed as he embraced me. “It felt good, didn’t it?” I backed away from him slightly. Spencer smiled and nodded.

“Like a weight off my shoulders,” he laughed as he looked back at me, “Thanks for that,”

“No, thank you, Spencer, I really needed you and your wonderful words of wisdom… I’ve been struggling with my sexuality a lot, ever since I was a teen really, and you just being there helped,” I smiled at him as I got comfortable in the bed. With that, we fell into a comfortable silence. Sleep wouldn’t find its way to us anytime soon. I think we were both still reeling on the adrenaline of the day. 

But then, I started thinking about our conversation in the car. When I had mentioned I was worried about him (or anyone else) thinking differently of me. I mean, that’s been a fear of mine for years. Someone can go from loving you to the ends of the earth to wanting to be on the furthest end of the earth just to be away from you. So, my fear was totally valid. I didn’t want to lose my friendship with Spencer, or anyone on the team.  

I quickly glanced at Spencer, noting that he was still quietly reading his book. He seemed at total peace with, well, everything. How did he do it? How did he get out of his head after a rough case, and after such a serious conversation? There were too many things I wanted to know, and too many questions I wanted to ask… Why not just ask them?

So, I did...

“Earlier, when you said me being non-binary wouldn’t change the way you think of me… How do…” I paused for a minute, trying to figure my next set of words. Because I could say something wrong, and it’d be the end of everything. “What do you think of me?” I looked up at him as I spoke. He smiled softly and nodded. It was probably a mistake, asking him what his thoughts were on me. I could only think of the worst. Well, I shouldn’t say the worst possible. Worst case scenario was that he was faking it all and he actually hated me. Well, don’t be too hard on yourself.  

“Well, you know,” Spencer shrugged as he shifted closer to me. I looked up at him before leaning away from him. 

“No, I don’t think I do know,” I stared at him, furrowing my eyebrows. He looked at me, dropping his book to his lap and slumping his shoulders slightly. 

“I love you… Okay? I love you whether you’re they/them, she/her, he/him, I don’t care, as long as you’re happy. If you’re happy, then I’m happy, because that’s all that matters to me. Your happiness,” he rambled for a minute. I just stared at him, feeling my shoulders relax as he spoke. My heart rate raised as he continued to talk about how he really felt about me, and I wished he said something sooner… “Hearing Emily misgendering you, and knowing what was going through your head… Sucked… It sucked watching! You deserve the best things…” He continued on, not caring that he was still rambling.

“Spencer,” I whispered, resting a hand on his shoulder to gain his attention. 

“And it’s ridiculous how long I’ve been in love with you too! I should have said something sooner but I didn’t! I don-”

“Spencer!” I shouted this time. It wasn’t an angry shout, though. No, the giggles in my voice and joyful smile on my lips told a different story. And that seemed to get his attention, considering he stopped talking and looked at me. His eyes scanned my face, landing on the joyous smile on my lips. 

“Yes?” He asked softly. I nearly fell into his body, and face, as I let my excitement get the better of me as I tried to kiss him. Spencer laughed as he lifted his hands to my shoulders to make sure I didn’t crash into him.

“I love you too,” I smiled as I looked up at his face. His eyes landed back on my face, his smile becoming soft as he looked at me. The expression his face held showed me that I was now his everything. And, it was a new feeling. I would never get used to a feeling so… grand. But, it was a feeling that I loved, and knew it’d be around for a long time. “What do you think the team will say?” I asked, looking at Spencer as he cupped my face in his hands. 

“About what, Honeybee?” he retorted, his voice a soft whisper. 

“About us, you and me being, well, you and me,” I tried to bite back my smile but failed when Spencer smiled back.

“Who cares what they think… I just care about you,” he smiled before pulling me back in for another kiss. 

“I think I like that answer." 

taglist: @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​ , @thebluetint​

[shrinkthisviolet]

Author Interview Tag!

Tagged by @maipreciation, thanks for thinking of me! This looks really fun :D

(Note: I’m keeping this as a running list, so if you’re ever wondering what fics im working on/brainstorming, make sure to check here! Last update was on 12/12/2020)

Name: Lavi! As of 12/5, I’m no longer going by my real name (see this post)

Fandoms: so many 😂 check my bio, I think I have them all listed. I’ve posted fic for Hamilton and ATLA, and then there was a huge Inktober compilation I posted last year with a whole host of fandoms. Currently, my major fandom is ATLA, and probably Kipo as I’m starting to move through S1

Where you post: I have an AO3 (lavi0123)! I used to have an FFN and a Wattpad, but I don’t use either of those anymore :/ tbh, I’m embarrassed of anything I still have up there 😂

Most popular one-shot: Most definitely we’ll give the world to you (and you’ll blow us all away), one of my contributions to Maiko Week! I’m not surprised it’s an ATLA fic, but I find it interesting that a fic with Izumi in it blew up so quickly. But hey, if y’all want more Izumi content, you won’t be disappointed 😉

Most popular multi-chapter fic: ...I’m really embarrassed to say because I don’t think I’ll ever finish it...but En Hamilton Heights is the only multichap fic I’ve published so it’s gotta be that one 😂 hopefully soon I’ll have another fic to add to that, since I’m working on one (sorry EHH fans but it’s been too long and tbh I don’t remember where I was going with it :/ I’m thinking I might orphan it)

Favorite story you’ve written so far: you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong) for sure! It’s super niche but it’s something I wrote out of love for a movie I discovered this Halloween and absolutely love. Though all you’ve got to do is want something (and then let yourself have it) is a close second. Basically, anything I write that sounds absolutely bonkers as a concept is one that I love 😂 (and it’s no coincidence that both fics are Mai-centric! I love all my Mai-centric fics nearly equally)

Fic you were nervous to post: Is there an “all of the above” option? 😂 I’m always nervous to post. But in particular, I was nervous for if you ran away (come back home), because it was Mai-centric and longer than any one-shot I’d written thus far, and also you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong), because it’s Mai-centric and a Coraline AU, which makes it BONKERS as an idea

Why was I nervous to post Mai-centric fics, you ask? Two reasons: 1) Mai is very different from who I am as a person (I vibe a lot more with Aang and Ty Lee, sometimes Katara and Sokka), so I didn’t want to upset the Mai stans by writing her incorrectly. 2) Mai is generally not well-liked in the fandom at large, so I especially didn’t want to attract antis who would accuse me of writing Mai as too emotional and loving (which is why I tried to justify that in my tags). Luckily, my comments have all been lovely, and I���m far less afraid to post fics about her now that I’ve written three fics with her as the focus! And the shoutout from @nonbinary-crafter-aang praising my portrayal of her?? I was touched 🥺 still am

How you choose your titles: Song lyrics or movie/book lines that speak to me, occasionally a pun. Remember that post I rb’d about how authors title their works? My tags pretty much say it all 😂

Do you outline: Ehh...define outlining 😂 for my one-shots, nope. But for my upcoming multichap works (see below) and Nanowrimo work (original fiction, so I won’t talk about it on here, but send an ask if you’re curious), YES ABSOLUTELY!

For my Nanowrimo work and one of my upcoming AUs (a Soulmate AU), the worldbuilding is so complex that it’s an absolute necessity. For the other upcoming AU (a time travel AU), there are just too many things that need to happen at certain times so as not to interfere with canon events, and things I want to change from canon and things I want to keep...I think you get the idea 😂

Complete: Basically my entire maiko halloweek series! Check it out if you want some fics about the most underrated canon ATLA couple :)

In-progress: ...En Hamilton Heights again...but not for long, sadly. Still trying to decide between a quick conclusion and just flat-out orphaning it. Still haven’t made up my mind, but either way, it won’t be what I originally planned, unfortunately.

I’m also counting my ATLA Soulmate AU on the basis of forever in my mind (only you), which has the worldbuilding and fits into the AU without much problem (the AU is going to be a series of one-shots, not a multichap fic, because there won’t be enough deviations from canon imo to justify multiple chapters. And one-shots are just less pressure for me 😂)

[EDIT 12/12/2020: added another fic because I’m an idiot and forgot about this too 🤦‍♀️😂 it’s a year-old idea that I started writing but I’m picking it back up thanks to the Heist banter in MatPat’s St Jude stream!]

-A fic series combining Escape the Night and Who Killed Markiplier (Heist and Date are part of it too, but only tangentially at the moment. Depends on how involved I want DA Y/N to be). Tentatively titled A Heavy Cost, and definitely won’t happen in any of Mark’s projects, but in a way that’s actually for the best 😂 the canonicity for me stops at ETN S3 (with some S4), then it’s canon divergence

Coming soon/not yet started: OOOH YESSS HERE WE GO

Okay okay sooo we’ve got two main things:

–An ATLA Soulmate AU, featuring platonic and romantic soulmates! I know I called it in-progress, and I stand by that even though I haven’t actually set up the series on AO3 yet, but this AU is about to be SO MUCH MORE than just a few Maiko moments. Because...drum roll...it’s gonna be entirely Aang-centric (with maybe one or two exceptions)! Like Mai, Aang is a character that doesn’t get as many -centric fics as he should (and being an Aang stan also isn’t unanimous for some reason??), so I’m gonna fix that. Plus I want to dive further into his mind, and I think I’m more equipped to do that than I was with Mai, since Aang and I are very similar in attitude.

–Bumizumi time travel AU, which can be read as platonic until the last couple chapters (it’ll be multichap) but definitely has a romantic agenda throughout. So just. Be warned if you don’t ship them. It’s gonna be chock full of comedy and antics! Also A LOT of platonic affection between Izumi and teen Zuko (and just between Izumi, Bumi, and the Gaang in general), because platonic affection is underrated and also I can :D I’m also probably gonna make fun of how some elements of affection have become solely romantic territory, because...um, no, hugging and holding hands and cuddling can be done between friends, thanks! (Maybe it’s the ace in me talking. But regardless)

There are also vague concepts I’m spitballing, like:

-Zukaang telepathy AU (Platonic Zukaang, the only romance I’ll ever write in ATLA is for the canon ships, prompted by a dream because apparently ATLA lives in my head rent-free forever now 😂)

-Evil Zuko AU (Azula doesn’t exist, mostly prompted after watching Aang make fun of Zhao and realizing that if Zuko had been in any position of power during the War...the Gaang would have stood no chance at all)

-Bumizumi Arranged Marriage AU (Bumi and Izumi both think the other is hotheaded/reckless (Izumi @ Bumi) or uptight (Bumi @ Izumi). So Kataang and Maiko (along with Sukka, Ty Lee, and Toph because...duh) set them up in an arranged marriage, with the presented reasoning being that they already know each other’s families, it’ll be a great symbol of unity, and this way Izumi doesn’t have to worry about suitors. They both agree to it (it’s arranged, not forced), and over time, they warm up to each other...and maybe even...fall in love?? Prompted because we need more arranged marriage fics! On that note, I’m gonna plug shadows and steel by @dearestpartnerofgreatness because arranged marriage needs more rep and this fic does it and with Maiko to boot!)

-Zukaang as Brothers AU (I saw a fic about this, but it wasn’t complete. If it’s not done by the time I get to this concept, I’m gonna write it, because just...imagine the possibilities! Zuko and Aang are already basically brothers in canon anyway, this is just making them brothers in blood as well as in their hearts. This is especially vague because I have no concept of how this is gonna work 🤷‍♀️ I’ll get to it eventually)

(Can you tell I’m obsessed with Zuko and Aang’s friendship? Because I am!)

[EDIT 11/25/2020: I’m adding two more because I forgot these have been swirling around in my head too 😂]

-A fix-it fic based on May You Always Be Satisfied, a backstory fic for Who Killed Markiplier by @blackaquokat! I recently reread it and remembered that I was gonna write a fix-it for that fic. Not because the fic sucks, it’s actually amazing! I’m just a sucker for the main (requited unrequited) pairing, and there’s at least five ways to make that pairing canon and avoid the mess of Who Killed Markiplier. And THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE HAPPY OKAY

-A Finnrey fix-it for the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy (this one is especially vague, and I probably won’t write it since a bunch of these already exist, but it’s fun to think about. Maybe if I ever run out of WIPs 🤷‍♀️)

Upcoming story that you’re most excited to write: I’m equally excited for the Soulmate AU and the Bumizumi Time Travel AU! I’m also excited for my Nanowrimo work to be finished, but that’s more so in-progress than upcoming

Tagging:

@nonbinary-crafter-aang @dearestpartnerofgreatness @ohsalamanders @blackaquokat (no pressure ofc, only if you want to! But please tag me if you do, I’d love to see it!)

[smalltragedy]

* brigette lundy-paine, nonbinary + they/them | you know kirby wormwood, right? they’re twenty five, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, two weeks? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to ring ring by mika like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole balancing acts at perilous heights destined to entertain, jack of all trades master of none, refusal to accept the mortal world as it is thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is december 1st, so they’re a sagittarius, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )

hllo welcome 2 my third character i love them a lot theyre a. remake of an older oc of mine so this is fun <3 sdfhk anyways once again i am asking u. pleathe like if u wld like to plot.

ARSON TW

mini playlist.

wizard ;; lucas lex / ring ring ;; mika / crows ;; clues / sunrise sunset ;; bright eyes / la llorona ;; beirut / no children ;; the mountain goats / might be love ;; the pesky snakes / sax in the city ;; let’s eat grandma.

statistics.

full name: kirby wormwood (currently).

nickname(s): magpie.

birthday: december 1st, 1995.

zodiac: sagittarius sun, aries moon, libra ascending.

mbti & temperament: estp & improvisor / sanguine.

label: the hellion.

hometown: abilene, texas.

sexuality: bisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

alright lets get right into it. kirby ws switched at birth. they cld’ve hd a very like. picket fence trampoline in the backyard. 4 columns cos its texas n it feels right. bt instead they were chosen <3 somewhat unintentionally <3 by dorothea n fawley wormwood, two traveling circus workers who emergency stopped in abilene.

n u know what. growing up in st. pierre’s traveling circus ws kinda fkn awesome? like ok. besides the fact tht they were homeschooled fr like evr n there were a sparing amt of children 2 socialize with? it ws p cool idk.

it ws kinda like everybody ws their parent n also not at all bc they were all very casual. bt they grew up learning hw 2 maintain the circus (n also like. normal school thingz bt i dnt think kirby hs ever cared abt school like ever) n whenever they hd a show kirby wld facepaint or handle tickets until they were old enough 2 start learning like. the Real fun things. 

fawley hd a lot of his own weird odd little like superstitions n beliefs n practically raised kirby on them like n they dnt rly <3 make a lot of sense. lots of made up philosophy. very much like. nothing defines u. u cn b anything or anyone. n kirby ws like ok cool. n then developed a god complex.

names didnt rly stick 2 kirby when they were a kid like. nothing satisfied them or felt worthy fr them or simply they just. got tired of a name. this isnt related 2 them being nonbinary BUT it did help ease some of the. pressure of exploring gender identity. theyve only hd one name tht stuck genuinely n tht ws magpie n. thts bc everybody hd their own bird name n it felt very. like community. like a role. usually the names they used during performances bt. anyways KFHDSGLKKHL

theyre Kirby bt answers 2 most. neutral nouns.

honestly. they were also a rascal as a youth. ws like. oh. i learned sleight of hand? cool. time 2 pick pockets. wld throw popcorn into the hair of other kids n b like. omggg what was that ... became a mime fr a year. it ws a rigorous training.

now a master of charades. bt anyways. they traveled pretty much weekly, maybe bimonthly n sometimes just pure monthly. there wsn’t an off season fr them, when the colder months came they’d travel south and when summer rolled in they’d go right back up again. it ws easy to switch personas almost daily n just. never reveal ur true self. totally not saying tht’s what kirby did bt thts what they did. it nvr made them lose sight of themselves it ws more like. acting. tricking ppl fr fun. 

anyways all good things come 2 an end and when kirby ws like. 18. they were like hey ur old enough that we cn trust u with fire. we think. n they started 2 learn fire-throwing n like. they were ok at it bt lessons were painfully slow n kirby ws like. i wld b so good at this if i cld do it all the time. n it ws like. hey kirby, chill. u already know a lot of things.

arson tw // u see where this is going. tents are kind of flammable. kirby ws unsupervised. bad decisions all around. circus is aflame. all the animals n all the circus workers got out fine bt like. st. pierre’s ws efficiently out of business. arson end of tw //

n kirby fkn booked it they just. ran. pure fear. nvr looked back which is like super traitorous of them 2 do bt. sometimes they meet up in secret like. sunglasses n all at a coffee shop. not all of them just like. fawley or someone else. theyre like. ur family u cld burn down a thousand circuses n we’d still love u. n kirby is like yeah i know bt i’ve rly committed to the bit now. n they dnt reunite.

anyways. since then kirby hs just been. a traveler. nvr rly staying anywhere fr super long n driving around in their shitty little van tht’d been used as housing back at st. pierre’s.

they’re in irving n theyve been there fr almost. suspiciously long. compared 2 their average stays. when asked abt what they do or why theyre there theyll just. give a vague answer or spin a long tale tht usually involves a burning circus.

theyre staying at uh. abernathy creek rn bc of course they r they fit in so naturally. welcomed with wide arms. might b soul searching rn might b on the hunt fr their birth parents might b just vibing ... whose to say ..

personality & facts.

has a Big personality tht attracts others fr better or fr worse. either super likeable or the most despicable person on the earth. no in betweens. n honestly tht is a talent in itself

has no off button is constantly. spinning tales or performing a dance or getting kicked out of bars fr whatever nonsense reason. 

honestly they prob think tht nothing bad cn ever happen to them even tho like. bad has literally happened 2 them before? love the optimism here. KLFGDLKFSDHGF

acts a bit like u’ve known them fr ur entire life they r oddly warm in tht way bt they themself r so distant tht its like. oh nice ok ...

both honest n yet dishonest like. yes they will hustle u out of ur money bt they will also tell u their opinion straight up. 

probably smart bt they r just like. prime thembo? flowy pirate shirts n cropped tshirts n pants tht r never tight. dresses like they do still work n live at a circus. 

likes 2 instigate things between others n then stand back n just watch it happen while taking like zero accountability. loves a good small town drama. avid milf hunter.

does not hv any faith in the american healthcare system at all n will straight up refuse 2 go 2 a hospital if they get hurt theyre like. i cn do it myself im like practically a professional. they r not a professional. 

bt does hv like. a thing abt apples. fkn loves them. 

uuuhhh cn play instruments bt all very badly. only knows one (1) song tht isnt made up n its wonderwall by oasis. they play it at parties. they expect fr tomatoes to b thrown at them at any given time.

very nimble. agile. granted its frm. learning circus tricks frm a baby age bt they hv impeccable balance n cn sneak up behind anyone without a single noise. uses this 2 their advantage in order 2 scare ppl. chaotic neutral.

loves having the attention on them i wont fk around here. will go to drastic measures to accomplish receiving it. my other muses r capable of taking things srsly bt kirby just. is not. they do not take a single thing srsly they barely even took. st. pierre’s destruction srsly n they caused it. maybe.

likes being able to just. be unknown so the amt tht ppl know abt them is actually very. little. i dnt think they even tell others their last name. sometimes not even their first. just hs so many aliases n nicknames. i know i didnt list any bt thts simply bc Any cld.

probably acts out to compensate fr the. underlying guilt they hv bt thts okay. i mean it isnt bt.

will probably show up if u call them fr help bt they lose interest in people p quickly n r always moving onto the next shiniest person. bt when they do they give them like. all their attention. if u wrong them in this period they will just. ignore it. bt when theyre bored then its like. u werent even friends at all? very odd.

perhaps it is commitment issues bt <3 ya. thts them. they do not claim favorite colors or movies or. most interests. probably bc theyre very very disconnected frm pop culture i think they learn everything thru twitter n google.

i wld not call them a good person bt i also dnt think theyre like evil horrible nasty awful they just. think abt themself a lot more than they think abt others n also refuses to face consequences ever and also .. anyways.

wanted plots.

part of the bird’s nest ;; honorary bird honorary circus member. u hv to be very well regarded by kirby to earn a bird name bt i feel like tht doesnt feel like a lot considering theyve only been here fr like. two weeks KDGDSHKGK. the catch is tht u cn only refer 2 them as magpie frm then forward. 

hand in unlovable hand ;; theres comfort in being terrible ppl together n it may not last bt it doesnt hv to anyways. its just them n the like. vibes. n knowing tht its smth thts nvr gna b long term. cld b anything ur character just hs to be also a little evil. KHDSGFDS

one jester ... wht abt ... TWO jesters .. ;; hoo boy. ooh man. unstoppable force and immovable object combine forces n just become. the worst of the worst. ultimate jokesters. epic pranksters. absolute clowns. chaotic energy unmatched. always nonsense. 

n also ;; ppl they’ve stolen frm, ppl who hv caught them in that act, ppl who’ve maybe seen them in the circus a very long time ago, Found Family Trope, real family shenanigans, kirby just asking everybody if theyre their dad., mortal enemies if they see each other its an instant duel 2 the death, etc.

[cryptidofthekeys]

Turg and Jim in: The Game Show but Jim makes Turg cheat so he can get all the money

(This is going to be stupid, probs short, and honestly I paused all my wips, that will be MUCH longer than this, just to write Turg Fanfiction, I paused my wwe fanfics for this, ....For T u r g, so naturally it'd be worth it, this isnt going to be like spectacular or anything tbh, its just short and maybe even for practice but either way I hope y’all enjoy... this.)

Turg looked up at the building and tilted his head "Turg in right place?" Jim came up beside him and looked at the building as well, a grin spread across his face "Yes Turg, yes we are! Now remember, here's the deal... You get in there, do all the work for me and win the mon... er... Green paper... And then I promise you'll get the jelly or whatever it was you wanted" Turg suddenly had a goofy smile on his face "Turg win! Turg want jelly!!" He exclaimed, running into the building, Jim chuckling and then quickly sprinting after him, so far so good, hopefully Turg could remember the plan just long enough to win him the money prize.

Turg had headed backstage and one of the employees walked towards him "There you are! You were almost late! And... Oh good lord, you are even more terrifying than I thought..." They sighed and just began walking off "I don't get paid enough for this..." They muttered, meanwhile Turg was just idling in his spot, he didn't really understand what they said but either way, he was more so fixated on the jelly... Jim wanted the green paper stuff and then he'd give Turg some jelly! Speak of the Devil, Jim had appeared behind Turg and placed a hand on his shoulder "Now, just remember the plan... You got this Turg!" Turg had a dopey smile plastered on his face "Believe in Turg?" Jim rolled his eyes, but he put on a smile and nodded "Yeah yeah sure, whatever, now get out there and win me the green paper!"

Turg nodded and before he headed onto the stage, Jim had placed an earpiece in Turg's ear, he had explained this part to Turg who seemed to understand the very basic hopefully, it was just a little... Insurance policy, he of course didn't mention the whole... Cheating part to Turg, otherwise then the other wouldn't have agreed to wear it more than likely, and of course Jim had made the earpiece himself so it was small enough so the host wouldn't see it... Well unless the host got very close and just looked directly at Turg's ear... But it was unlikely they'd do anything like that! And besides, he was going to make one hundred percent sure that he was NOT going to get caught, he needed that money and he'd do anything to get it!

Turg then headed out, waving at all the audience members who gasped in horror at first but then they slowly began clapping, they... They really didn't... Know what to think of this man, er... Monster? Whatever it was coming onto the stage, even the host of the show looked a little... Nervous, they began whispering something into the ear piece, just sighing afterwards and then looking back at Turg and smiling "Hello hello hello! Welcome Contestant Number One! May we have your name please?" Turg walked behind the little table in front of him and looked at the host, still having the dopey smile spread across his face, it seemed like he didn't even really know what was going on "Turg!" The host looked even more confused than they already were "Erm... Is Turg your name?" The other nodded "Turg Turg!" The host didn't want to know, they didn't care about asking, they'd just roll with it "Well uh... Welcome Turg Turg!" The host then moved to the other contestant Turg would be competing against "Annnd Contestant Number Twooo, what's your name?"

"Peyton!" (listen, they dont need a last name its fine and if thats your name by any chance reader, well, im very sorry to put you in this nightmare asjdfklsjhdfksla) The host grinned "Welcome Peyton! Alright audience, now that we've gotten acquainted with our contestants now we can begin the game! Noooww... The rules are simple! Very simple! We'll have fifteen questions, whoever buzzes in and guesses the correct answer wins a point! The person with the most points by the end of things will be the winner! And of course, the prize will be One-Hundred Thooouussaannd Dolllllaaaarrrssss~! Or, if the winner is feeling PARTICULARLY lucky, they will be given a bonus round where they can win even more money! In fact, they'll be winning Four-Hundred Thousand~!" The host glanced at Turg and looked towards the audience "Although... If I could, I'd just pay t h a t thing whatever it wanted just to get out of the building!"

(Jim’s not gonna care much bout the host insulting Turg now if it were him o h b o y- hahaha n o- but in this case like always- he wants money, who cares bout Turg)

Turg still had the smile on his face, as he heard the audience laugh he clapped even though they were technically making fun him, and then the music had cue'd, the host looked down at their paper "Alright! First Question~!" There was a pause before they continued "Can you name the THIRD largest freshwater lake in the world?" Turg had buzzed in, he honestly just pushed the button because it was glowing red, the voice in his ear piece had whispered the answer to him and surprisingly Turg understood "Turg says... Lake... Superior?" The host was surprisingly shocked and so was the other contestant and the audience, there was a dinging noise as the host spoke "Th...That is... Correct...! One point goes to a Mr. Turg Turg~! Wow... You are smarter than you look! And you look... Unholy... Eugh..." Turg just smiled and clapped "Turg do good!" The host nodded "Uh riiight... Anyways, next question! What is someone who shoes horses called?" Turg had managed to buzz in again before Peyton could, maybe it was because Peyton was still stunned at the other's intelligence.

Once again, the voice whispered the answer into Turg's earpiece "Turg think it... Farrier?" A shocked gasp resonated within the building, he was actually getting these correct... The host blinked in surprise "That is... Also... Correct, another point awarded to Turg, bringing him to a total of two~! C'mon Peyton! You should step up your gaaame~!" Peyton nodded, this time they'd buzz in, they were going to be prepared and focused...! "Third Question~! What kind of weapon is a falchion?" This time... Peyton had managed to buzz in "A Sword!" The host grinned and uttered out a correct and the audience and even Turg cheered despite them being correct meant they were one step closer to catching up, Jim was a little bit upset at that... He couldn't let them catch up! He'd think of something if he needed, after all he was one of the smartest people around! The host then cleared their throat before continuing "Alriiighty~! Fourth Question~!"

"What is another word for lexicon?" Turg had once again failed to hit the buzzer before Peyton, he seemed to be distracted at the moment much to Jim's dismay... "A Dictionary!" The host seemed delighted now "Cooorrreect~! Another point for Peyton, its a tie so far ladies, gentlemen, and all non-binary folks!" (yes, the host included nonbinary folk, why? Bc I can and am supportive, thats why) Jim grew angrier at this by the second, not by the host including non-binary folks, no, that's actually progressive and smart, and more game shows should do this, if he ran a game show he would do that ...That'd actually be a good idea, hosting his own game show, he should do that some time, he shook his head, he was losing focus! Anyways, he was angry because the other contestant was slowly catching up, it was almost break time so he had a backup plan already in the works just in case he needed to put a stop to that potential threat, then the host looked at both Turg and Peyton "Fifth Question and then we'll go to a commercial break~! Can you name the seventh planet from the sun?"

Peyton buzzed in "Uhh... Ve-Venus...?" They... Didn’t really know much about planets sadly... A noise played and the host shook their head "I'm sorry but that is iiinnncorrect~! Turg, its onto you~!" Jim once again whispered the answer into Turg's ear "Turg say it Uranus!" A resounding 'ding ding ding!' played "Coooorrreect~! So far, that leaves Turg at three and Peyton at twwooooo~! We'll be right back after these messages folks, stay tuned you don't wanna miss this~!" And with that, commercial break began, the host going off somewhere to get a drink, honestly despite one of their contests looking like a horrific monstrosity, he seemed smart! ...A little too smart for his own good, something was going on... It just didn't add up, how could something that seemed so... Out of it, something that seemed to be lost in its own little world be so smart?! The host would find out the truth soon enough, meanwhile backstage Peyton was sitting down and just thinking, they were unsure now if they could beat Turg... He was smarter than they give him credit for, and speaking of him... Peyton noticed that Turg had sat beside them "Oh, uh, hi Turg!"

Turg gave them a little wave, he seemed to notice their expression and he tilted his head "Turg make sad? Turg make... Uncomfortable?" Peyton shook their head "No no! You uh, didn't make me sad or uncomfortable, I was just thinking... You're really good at this game! I didn't expect it, if I'm being honest... While I would like to win, its been an honor competing against you!" Turg smiled "Turg think you good too! Turg need win though... Jim promise Turg jelly if he wins Jim the green paper stuff! Turg hope you understand" Peyton looked at Turg and blinked, they were a bit confused by that, but it wasn't really any of their business... The host however had overheard their conversation, well... At least they knew he had a motivation now as to why he's doing this, they then walked on back stage, time to look for this... Jim fellow... Maybe chatting with him would give them the answers they seek... They knew spying on others wasn't particularly... A good thing but they needed answers before they continued.

Eventually they had heard someone laughing backstage, that laugh unnerved them immensely, it sounded... unhinged... They crept up and hid behind one of the objects laying around backstage, meanwhile Jim himself was absolutely delighted, he seemed to be on the phone with someone from what the host could tell... "My plan is going so well! And I don't even have to do any of the work either, I'm tellin' ya Grim with the little earpiece I placed on Turg, m y victory is guaranteed~!   ...   What do you mean you don't think it'll work?! Well what do you know anyways?!" Jim hung up on this... 'Grim' person and sighed "I'll show Grim... I'm gonna rub it in his face when this works and I win the money" The host grinned and whispered to themselves "Not if I have anything to say about it... You greedy dirt bag...~" The host flinched as something fell over, this caught Jim's attention and immediately the host had crept away, didn't want the other to catch them in the act! Unbeknownst to them however, it was a little too late, Jim had spotted them right before they could get out of there, he'd definitely have to keep tabs on this one...

(I know the chance im taking by saying you greedy dirt bag but I can assure you I know what im doing by referencing even just a s m i d g e of that)

Meanwhile... The show was coming back on, everyone had gotten back into their places, and then after a countdown from five, the music played and the host had a big grin on their face, they would let the game play out until the end... But they knew what they were going to do, they were gonna expose Turg and Jim like the frauds they were! "Aannnnd we're back ladies, gentlemen, and of course can never forget the non-binary folks out there as well~! Alrighty, so once again, we have Turg in the lead with three buuuut... Peyton's not far behind folks~! They're only a little behind with only two points but they still have a chance to catch up~! From here on out the questions are going to be m u c h harder~! Onto the Sixth Question~! In "Thunderbirds", what was Lady Penelope's chauffeur called?" Peyton buzzed in immediately "Parker!" The audience clapped as the host spoke "Coorrecttt~! Oooh its a tie now~! Turg three and Peyton three! C'mon now Turg, don't let them beat you now, you've come sooo far~!" There was a pause before the next question "Seventh Question~! On "Blue Peter", what was John Noakes's dog called?" Turg buzzed in this time and listened as Jim whispered the answer "Turg says Shep!"

More clapping from the audience "Cooorreecct~! Turg four, Peyton three~! Eighth Question! What is sushi traditionally wrapped in?" It was Peyton's turn now to buzz in "Edible Seaweed!” Another one correct, despite the host knowing that Turg was cheating, this was still all so exciting! "Correct again~! Nineth Question! What is the oldest surviving printed book in the world?" Turg buzzed in this time and took a second as Jim once again helped out "Turg think it... The Diamond Sutra!" Another round of applause and cheers, the audience as loving this! "Correct! Tenth Question~! How tall would a double elephant folio book be?" Peyton buzzed in now "Fifty Inches!" A ding ding ding noise sounded but it was a little drowned out by the audience's cheers and applause "Cooorrrecct~! Alrighty folks, it looks like Turg and Peyton are once again tied! Five to five! Oh the suspense is killing me! Who will win this game and the prize~!" The questions went on and on... Each contestant buzzing in and getting them correct, eventually they came to the final question, the music got much more dramatic than before as the host's voice echoed throughout the building.

"Allriighty! Time for the f i n a l question folks! Among land animals..." The host paused before continuing, just adding to the dramatic flair "What species has the largest eyes?" Both buzzers went off but the host had been paying close attention to whose buzzer went off first and it was... "Turg! Do you have the answer!" Turg nodded, waiting for a few moments, he was a little confused as to why the host was coming in so close to him and looking at the side of his head, the host had seen the earpiece, just like Jim said was there... And they even heard a faint voice now that they were close enough give out the answer "Turg says... Ostrich!" There was a pause, the air was tense with suspension before balloons came floating down, confetti popped and cheery music played "Aaannnd cooonngraaatulations Tuuurrrrrrg! You arree the winner!" Jim immediately came out from backstage, walking up to hug Turg who immediately hugged him back and began clapping.

(lemme tell y’all when I used google to literally fact check every question I got off this one site, I was committed to getting this right, who knows google probs lied on some of them but I did my research as best I could just for this one lil fanfic and its more like a crack fic at this point just thought I’d point that out)

"But wait hold on! There's more folks!" The host immediately grabbed the earpiece from Turg's ear "I was waiting for this for the remainder of the show! Lookie here, lookie here! Turg is no winner folks! But a fraud, this man uh... Jim... has placed a little earpiece device on the ma.. er... monster... thing, whatever he is! He has been whispering the answers into Turg's ear! Their nothing but cheaters the both of them!" The audience along with Peyton had gasped, and then the audience started booing, Turg was confused however and just tilted his head until he heard the word cheater and looked back at Jim "Turg... cheat...? Turg do bad?!" Uh-Oh... Now Jim was caught, he didn't want to have to do this but his hand was forced ...Oh who was he kidding, he would LOVE to do this any day of the week! He brought out The Book of Chaos and began reciting something from the book, meanwhile the host was just speaking out towards Peyton and the audience "Sooo it looks like Peyton's the winner folk-" They paused as they looked back towards Jim, eyes widening in horror as they saw the man... Floating...?

His eyes looked demonic as he kept chanting the words from the book in an entirely foreign language, and just then... Fires consumed the host and began spreading rapidly, the exits were engulfed in flames in no time, and the screams of everyone echoed throughout the building, people trying desperately to find a way out, or the others who caught on fire trying to put themselves out, meanwhile Jim was casually whistling as he walked over and swiped the money, he should have just done this in the first place, it would have been so much easier! It's always easier to murder and steal than to... Okay well he didn't really play by the rules either he pretty much cheated at that too, either way! He got the money, and now he was happy, he grabbed Turg by the arm and just like that they were teleport-ed out of the building, Jim had only teleport-ed them a good bit away, he DID want to watch the building burn to the ground at the very least.

(listen, Idk how many powers Jim has- but if he can set people on fire, give them death kisses, and god knows what else he can teleport if he wants)

Turg was sitting on one of the parking blocks away from Jim, looking down at the ground, he was... Awfully quiet for once which made Jim look over and raise a brow "What's wrong with you?" Turg didn't speak, he just kept his gaze on the ground, he didn't want to watch the building burn unlike Jim, who blinked in surprise... This was the quietest Turg had been pretty much ever, so Jim was confused before he realized, was Turg... Angry with him...? "Look, Turg, I had to do what I did, I needed the green paper, the money! I needed to insure we won! Otherwise I couldn't have gotten you jelly!" There was a long moment of silence before Turg spoke up "You make Turg cheat, you make Turg do bad thing... You make Turg e v i l... Turg not forgive Jim... Nuh-uh..." Jim rolled his eyes "Come on Turg... It's not THAT bad! I could've made ya do w o r s e you know..." The sound of the entire building beginning to collapse took Jim's attention and the pair sat in silence, watching the building begin to fall in on itself, not a soul seemed to make it out of there...

Except... Oh no wait! There was somebody crawling out and away! Turg seemed to stand up at this and squint, he could see... It was Peyton! "That Peyton! Person Turg was competing against!" Jim looked ahead "Well, what a surprise! They made it out alive! ...A witness I'll have to make sure doesn't tell anybody who caused this..." He whispered the last part to himself, watching as Turg rushed off in Peyton's direction, once he got there he helped Peyton up who looked back at Turg "Ugh... Tu..Turg...? What... What are you doing here? Why did you come back...?" Turg looked at Peyton as he helped them to their feet "...Turg have something to say... Turg sorry... Jim made Turg do bad, Jim made Turg do evil thing... Jim... Lied to Turg..." Peyton looked at the other, they felt... Rather bad for him... He was manipulated into doing someone else's dirty work... "It's... It's alright Turg... Honest, I forgive you... You were tricked into doing something you would have never if you knew what it was, right?" Turg nodded "Turg never want to cheat, never want to be bad! Turg want good! Turg do good!"

Peyton nodded and smiled "Yeah... That's what I thought..." Before Peyton could say anything else, Jim had came over and immediately they backed away, Turg noticed this and stood in front of Peyton "Jim you go away! Turg protect new friend! They good, they kind!" Jim sighed "Turg, I'm not going to hurt them, I... eugh... I promise, and I would n e v e r break a promise!" That was a lie but... Turg was extremely gullible and he seems to believe this luckily for him... "I just need to talk to them for a second..." Turg slowly nodded and stood out of the way, but he was still going to stick close by, sure, there was no way he could or would hurt Jim, even if he did make him do a bad thing... Turg was a pacifist! But he would protect his friend in... SOME way... Jim had grabbed Peyton and pulled them close "Look, you can't tell anybody who did this... If you do, I'll kill you too, understand?" Peyton looked at Jim, and sure, that threat was terrifying but... They wanted to try something "...I'll keep quiet about this situation... Under one condition, just... hear me out..." Jim was silent, staring at Peyton in confusion "Go get your friend, Turg, some jelly... And APOLOGIZE to him...! He's very upset with you and rightfully so...!"

Jim groaned in frustration "Ugh, f i n e...! Fine...! If it'll make you and him get off my case about it and if it'll keep you quiet I'll go get him some damn jelly but I swear, if you go tell anybody after this... I'll-" Peyton cut him off "I won't, I swear it... Just if you do this ONE thing..." And with that Jim was off, and then Peyton sighed deeply, they were so thankful he was gone now... And he wasn't that close to them, after all, being near that man considering he just set the building on fire, killed multiple people and almost killed them as well, it was terrifying to even look at him... Turg though, they just wanted him to be happy, and not be sad or upset about this... Turg tilted his head "Jim... go away...? Just like... that?" Peyton nodded "He'll uh, be back soon... He needed to do something I think... For now let's just... Sit here, and talk for awhile..." and so both Turg and Peyton sat there, talking away and getting to know each other, it was almost nighttime when Jim came back, a large plate of jelly which made Turg's eyes light up, however, this could just be another trick, he turned away and kept his eyes away from the plate.

Jim looked at Peyton who encouraged him to go on... He took a deep breath and came closer to Turg "...Turg... Listen... I'm... I'm sorry about earlier, I'm sorry I lied to you and used to in order to gain profit, I shouldn't have done that ...To you anyways... So I uh, bought you some jelly... Just like I said I would... So uh, yeah..." Jim realized how... Awkward he sounded, he had never really apologized for anything before so this was a weird... Thing, either way, all he needed was Turg to forgive him and that was it... Turg was silent for a few minutes, his eyes slowly drifting back toward the jelly, no matter how many times he tried to resist he just couldn't help it, he grabbed the plate and immediately started consuming the jelly, he was about to consume the plate as well but Jim took it back from him "No no, let's uh, n o t eat the plate in front of your little friend there! That's uh, impolite or whatever!" Turg nodded and there was a long pause before Turg smiled "Okay... Turg forgive Jim...! Jelly was good!" Jim might not be... The best... But he at least honored his word of getting him some jelly!

It was a win in Turg's head at least, meanwhile Jim was just thankful that mess was over with, now he wouldn't have to deal with Turg being mad at him, and of course more importantly, Peyton wouldn't tell a soul now, it was set in stone! "We uh, should be getting home... It's late and some of us want to sleep" Turg nodded and turned back to Peyton "Turg's friend want stay? With us?" Peyton looked at Jim and then back at Turg "Aha no... No thank you... I've got my own place but don't worry Turg, I'm sure we'll see each other, I can uhhh... Come visit, whenever you'd like!" This made Turg smile and let out a series of... weird noises, but they sounded like happy ones! He looked thrilled which Jim immediately ruined the mood "Alright, alright, very touching, we're going now" Turg waved bye before being teleport-ed away with Jim... While Peyton didn't like Jim at all in the slightest, they would however be more than happy to visit Turg whenever he wanted...

The End.

I’ve never used “The End” I dont think in any of my stories but for once- there it is, it makes a cameo-

... I swear I tried my best y’all, you can tell happy endings eugh, arent my strong suit, but oh well no matter

[raiswriting]

muse

request: art major!reader w law major!doyoung pls :cc bullet note format if u can!!!

a/n: he’s a year older than you but it doesn’t matter that much

warning: a few swear words oopsie

genre: fluffy college!au

pairing: doyoung x reader

summary: ummm basically just how you and doyoung meet and get to know each other

word count: 5.1k (oops)

lets GOOOOOOOO

okay so basically college has been a JOURNEY

people ALWAYS had some shit to say as soon as they found out you were an art major

it was usually “what are you going to do with that” “do you know how unsteady that career path is”

liKE I GET IT

do they really think they’re telling you something new????

oh I’m sorry your majoring in business Susan™ and you decide to throw away your passions just because some high school counselor told you that you wouldn’t be able to support yourself but IM going to make my passion a career

lol sorry I have a lot of feelings

now onto how you met your mans doyoung

your freshman and sophomore years, you had only seen him in passing

tbh you barely recognized him when you saw him more than once

you knew him as “that one dude that i always see in the dining hall wearing suits”

then junior year you got a job at the convenience store on campus (lets get this BREAD)

pls tell me it isn’t some weird niche thing that only my school has

aNyWHO he started coming in around 2 am right before closing

and ALWAYS picked up 3 coffees all of which had double shots of espresso

this happened about 2 or 3 times a week

(which is very unhealthy guys gals and nonbinary pals pls try to drink cold water instead, it helps wake me up or green tea)

so despite seeing him so often at work, he began to appear less and less everywhere else

were you lowkey kinda sad about it???

mAYhaPS

that was until winter quarter started

you needed an elective class, SO you figured ‘eh why not take philosophy’ you had heard around that the professor is really chill and overall the class wasn’t supposed to be that bad

WELL GUESS AGAIN

 because that really nice professor that everyone loved isn’t the one teaching the class this quarter

but hey you figured let’s go into this with an open mind and hope for the best

well on day one of this class (which is a 9 am by the way) guess who struts through the door

mister “that one guy i’d always see wearing a suit” who became mister “that one dude who always buys too much coffee at 3 am”

the man… the myth…… the legend………….MISTER KIM DOYOUNG

yep and ya boi decided to sit 2 seats down from you, it was too far to say hi or anything (esp bc you had never really spoken to him before) but like he was also just close enough for it to be awkward

so class went by normally you found out that the new professor wasn’t THAT bad but there was definitely gonna be a lot of work involved

so yeah life carries on as normal

you still see him all the time at the convenience store

one night it had been a particularly rough shift

your alarm didn’t go off, so you were running late, it had started to rain on your walk to work, and when you finally got there your manager apparently had someone piss in his cheerios because he had S U C H an attitude because you were

 TWO

MINUTES

LATE

you were sat behind the counter after what felt like hours of sweeping and mopping the floors

that’s when he walked in

you didn’t even lift your head to greet him as “hi, welcome” crawled itself out of your mouth

you did however notice when he sat his 3 cans of coffee in front of you

“hey your y/n right?”

 “that’s what it says on my nametag”

“haha yeah it does. i think i have you in my philosophy class”

when you finally met his eyes, you felt a little bad

you had kinda been giving him the cold shoulder for something that wasn’t his fault

 you gave him a little smile

“yeah i am. doyoung right?”

he nodded slightly

the air was a little awkward and silent as you scanned his coffees

as you handed him the receipt he asked “hey do you maybe want to study together sometime. i mean our test is in like two weeks and it’s a quarter of our grade so like if you were free we could hang out and get some work done?”

dUDE you froze

here he was standing right in front of you; messy hair, sweatpants, a sweatshirt repping your school logo and looking very nervous (but very attractive lmao)

i guess your reply took a little too long because he quickly started to back peddle

“i mean if you prefer to study alone that’s cool. i just always see you during lecture and you look like you understand the material and sometimes i get a little lost in terminology but if you don’t want to that’s fine too.”

you quickly snapped out of your haze

 “no, no. i would love to study with you. here let me give you my number so we can meet up. most of my classes are in the morning so any time after like noon should be fine.”

 you grabbed his receipt back and quickly scribbled your number on it before handing it back

“just text me when you want to get together”

 okay honestly you had never been one to give out your phone number just like that and you didn’t really like studying with people

but something about him made it so hard to say no

you just had this urge to get to know him

so when he texted you a few days later asking if you were free to study that night

of course you said yes

and it went pretty smoothly

he has a much better understanding of the material than he let on at first

he even ended up helping you understand a few things

you got together w few times over the next couple of weeks

each time you met you got to know each other more and more

yall quickly became friends

well yall became friends after the first night studying because lets be real it was awKWARD

like neither of you felt particularly comfortable yet because this was the first time you had actually hung out with each other despite knowing of each other’s existence for two years

oh yeah that’s something you found out after getting to know one another

 he had always seen you around campus and wanted to get to know you but never did because he thought it’d freak you out having a random stranger coming up to you like

‘hey I know you don’t know me but I see you all the time. let’s be friends.’

which isn’t THAT crazy but to each their own

okay but let’s jump to the time 2 days before your exam

you guys agreed to meet up at the library and the plan was to study for A WHILE just to make sure you were prepared ya know?

so like you get there and he was already sitting in a room waiting

 when you open the door he gets up to hug you

which he hasn’t ever done before

and like tbh he was really warm and smelled really nice like it his cologne wasn’t too strong, and it smelt sweet but also very inviting which isn’t really a scent but like do you get me? and he gave a really tight hug like the type that you didn’t want to let go of it felt as though you could stay there forever (this is also where you lowkey start having feelings for him but shhh because you don’t realize it yet)

so back the point

obvi you start studying and besides the hug nothing was really that different

you got through the material, quizzed each other, talked a bit

ya know the usual

time flew by and the next thing you know it’s 12:30 am and the library would be closing at 1 so you decide to wrap it up

“alright doyoung i’ll see you in class. get some rest before the test okay?”

 “yeah yeah i will” he rolled his eyes a little bit

 “seriously dude. i know you. go straight to sleep when you get back to your place”

he worried you sometimes. He really wanted to do well and the applications for law school were opening up soon, so he’s been kinda stressed no matter how much he tried to hide it and this test coming up isn’t helping

“i will. i promise.”

he walked you out of the library and you two would usually part ways and walk alone to your apartments

before you could turn and say goodbye doyoung was already speaking

“hey it’s a lot darker out here than usual”

you looked up at the pitch-black sky

“yeah I guess it is, oh well at least I have my pep-“

 “what? you have your pepper spray right?”

“no i forgot that i let my roommate borrow it. she’s going to a sorority thing and won’t be back until like 3 or 4. it’s fine though my apartment is only like a 10-minute walk. goodnight do”

“wait y/n. i’ll walk you back. it’s way too late and too dark for you to go home”

“no i couldn’t ask you to do that. you’re law and society class is at 8 am tomorrow so you need to get some sleep.”

 “well i won’t be able to sleep anyway if I’m staying up worried about you. so lead the way.”

despite the cold fall air, your face felt hot

like you know that it’s normal for friends to be worried about each other but that didn’t make doyoung saying it any less charming

the walk back was nerve wracking

you guys normally don’t hang out outside of the context of studying

so like this was weird, nice but weird

and once you go to your door there was a cast of silence

doyoung was just looking at you

normally it would make you kinda uncomfy/insecure but right now you were calm

there was something about looking into his eyes

the brown was so warm and inviting

after a few seconds of the comfortable silence, he finally looked away

and I awkwardly cleared my throat “thank you for walking me home doyoung”

 “of course, i’m just gald to know you got here safely”

“so um, i was gonna wish you luck just in case we don’t see each other before the test but i mean judging from our study session you won’t need it though.”

he giggled and i swear someone could have mopped up your heart because it was in a puddle on the floor

“shut up y/n. thank you though. i always appreciate your kind words. do you want to meet for lunch after the exam? i usually have a lab afterwards but it got cancelled so if you’re free we should meet up.” asjdjjklcbclkNCKDLSNCOS

“yeah i am free. i guess i’ll see you then.”

 he took a few steps back “yeah i guess you will. goodnight y/n”

“goodnight doyoung. actually get some sleep tonight, yeah?”

you could see his shoulders shake with laughter as he walked down the steps

to say you were smitten would be an UNDERSTATEMENT

the smile that showed up didn’t leave even after you fell asleep

when you get to class on that friday morning, doyoung is already sitting in his usual seat

the bags that usually take their place beneath his eyes are barely visible today

hopefully he took your advice and actually went to sleep

after the test you both got some burgers for lunch and just talked it had nothing to do with the test which was nice

i guess y’all make a great pair because once the scores came out, both of you got A’s

after that studying together became a routine

every tuesday, thursday and saturday leading up to the next test,  you guys would review or sometimes just hang out

it was a mutual decision to help each other study

even if you didn’t share the class, one would be there to quiz and make sure the other focused (most of the time it worked, other times you’d be the reason they got distracted and vice versa)

the two of you would go out for lunch on those days instead

as the quarter drew to a close and the break got nearer and nearer as did finals week

you and doyoung tried to keep up with your study schedule but it was getting harder

you had artwork due

you were particularly stressed over a sculpture that was assigned

your teacher gave you those choice of clay or marbleas a medium and clearly you chose clay

you were going to do marble but then you remembered the other 3 tests you need to prepare for and a portfolio that had to fit the theme of mythology

so basically you had a lot of art to produce and NO INSPIRATION like none, zero, zip, zilch, nada

you sat in the room you had reserved in the arts building

a pile of clay sat atop a slab of rock, a blank page of a sketchbook sat next to that

scrolling through pinterest had stopped working long ago and at this point you were losing hope

ring, ring, ring

doyoung’s name popped up on your screen

it was odd because you two usually texted for everything

“hey, do what’s up?”

“hi y/n i was just wondering if you wanted to grab some fro-yo. i just got out of another test and could use some company”

“ahh, doyoung i’m sorry but i’m stuck doing work. do you remember that mythology sculpture i told you about? well, it’s due next Wednesday and i haven’t even started on it yet”

his voice sounded so concerned “is everything okay? how are you doing?”

“i’m doing okay, just tired. i’ve been trying so hard but can’t find any inspiration” you sighed into the phone, looking out the window of your room

“what room are you in?”

“room 247 in building B. why?”

“just sit tight.”

the call ended before you could ask any more questions

okay when i tell yall it was less than five minutes and he was walking through the door just know that what i really mean is he rAN FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF CAMPUS TO COME COMFORT YOU

so yeah, he got there huffin and puffin, ready to blow your house down (with love)

“doyoung, what are you doing here?”

“well you were upset.” his tone was so matter-of-fact, and his eyes were so wide and innocent

honestly he looked so cute but like you were still very confused

what was he doing there?????

yeah you were upset but you also didn’t want to worry him

he casually walked over to a seat beside a window and pulled something out of his backpack

as he got closer and reached his hand out for you to take it, you noticed it was a sandwich

“it’s ham and cheese. light mayo, no lettuce or tomato”

when your eyes looked up at him he wouldn’t make eye contact

“you said this is the only way you take your sandwiches”

yALL 

you only told him this once in passing because he was eating a sandwich with mayo

but pls tell you are putting the pieces together

he stopped to get you food and made it across campus in 5 minutes

the walk alONE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN 10 MINUTES

HE STOPPED AND GOT YOU FOOD TO MAKE SURE YOU WEREN’T SKIPPING ANY MEALS

MARRY THID MANFSJDLFG

alrighty anywho

obviously you took the sandwich and spent 5 minutes thanking him for getting it for you

he sat back down in his seat near the window as you guys chatted for a bit

the conversation slowed slightly and you were able to just look at him

the light was bouncing off his face perfectly

his eyes looked like freshly brewed coffee. they were warm and inviting

his smile somehow managed to outshine the light pouring in

there he was

in all of his glory

your muse

your inspiration

his expression shifted to one of confusion

“y/n, why are you looking at me like that”

he could be your subject for not only the sculpture but also the portfolio as well

“okay this may be an odd favor and you can feel free to say no”

your leg couldn’t stop bouncing up and down and you thought your hands might catch a cramp from all the wringing they were doing

“don’t be silly. what is it?”

“well, i was thinking maybe you could be the model for my sculpture.”

 “of course i will but i thought it was supposed to be about mythology and i’m no greek god”

he chuckled a little bit

“shut up do. are you kidding me? your shoulders are like a mile wide. you have a great jawline and that smile? you’d have all the mortal girls falling for you i mean i did. that sounds like god-material to me”

he threw his head back laughing

mostly to hide the huge blush creeping up his cheeks

“okay, okay. i’ll pose for you. what do i have to do?”

“just sit still so that i can take some measurements of your face and then i’ll take some photos for reference afterwards.”

doyoung did as he was told for the most part

he sat there patiently

he kept peeking at your sketchbook as you laid out the rough ideas for a few of your other pieces

tbh you hadn’t even noticed

you were in the ZONE, you hadn’t been this inspired in a while and you wanted to take full advantage of it

you also hadn’t noticed the ,,,, um,,,, lack of space,,,,,, between the two of you

well doyoung had, to say the least

he sat there desperately hoping and praying that you wouldn’t notice how sharply he would breathe in everytime your hands touched his face to move its position

or that you couldn’t notice how much his hands were shaking and how he was constantly wiping them on his pants because they were very sweaty

finally, you had all the information you needed

as you stepped back and over to your chair in front of the clay, doyoung could finally breath

“doyoung, do you have any other classes today? i don’t want to keep you here if you have plans. you can go i can work off of the reference pictures”

he very vigorously shook his head

“no no, i’m free for the day.”

“okay. you should probably go get something to eat while get this started. this will probably be a long process.”

“yeah sure. do you want me to grab you anything while I’m gone?”

“nope i’m good. i already had the sandwich you brought me.”

“okay then i’ll be right back”

after he left it easy to feel the emptiness of the room

even though you were enveloped in your work it was still noticeable

the absence of his presence was palpable

the lack of it was almost suffocating

while you were worked on getting the basic shape and structure you found yourself unsettled

unable to get back into the ‘zone’ you found yourself in before

still, you pushed through the weird shift in the air, but it wasn’t long before doyoung came back with a bag of food

“hey doyoung.”

he glanced over at your pile of clay

“whoa. you made a lot of progress. okay i know you said that you didn’t want anything to eat but i brought burgers and some chips and stuff just in case.

“doyoung, you really didn’t have to. i would have been fine.”

he rolled his eyes but didn’t reply. he simply sat back in his chair and ate some of the fries that came with his burger

the hours seemed to fly by once doyoung returned

it also helped that you played music on the speaker that you brought

before you knew it, it was 5 pm and the sun was setting

you leaned back from your chair to stretch before standing and taking a good look at the sculpture

after about 4 hours of work, you were almost done

of course there were still things that needed to be touched up, like the hair and the eyes

you had decided on a pose of doyoung looking up and off into the distance

you turned and washed your hands in the sink at the back of the room

“here’s your burger if you want it. it might be a little cold, but it doesn’t have any mustard, lettuce, tomato, or pickle. that’s how you like it right?”

YALL HE DID IT AGAIN

HE REALLY JUST OUT HERE BEIN A WHOLE SWEETHEART

“yeah, how’d you know?”

“remember we met up for dinner before a study session a few weeks ago? that’s how you ordered your burger and you told me about how dill pickles were the bane of your existence”

 “which they are” you chuckled “but i can’t believe you remembered that”

“of course, i did. i remember everything you tell me”

your heart melted for like the fiFTH TIME TODAY

you smiled and blushed before grabbing the wrapped burger from his hands

you guys sat and ate in comfortable silence

once you had finished you turned to him

“if you’re ready to leave you can. i just have a few things to add but it’ll be okay if you aren’t here. i’m just about out of daylight anyway.”

he playfully cocked his head to the side and crossed his arms

“y/n. i have a feeling you’re trying to get rid of me”

“maybe i am doyoung. whatcha gonna do about it?”

“cry.”

you both busted up laughing

once you had calmed down you looked at him

“seriously do. if you wanna go study or sleep or something go ahead”

he stood up and began to walk closer to you

“oh stop that. y/n it isn’t a burden for me to stay here with you. i’m honored that you would choose me to be the subject of your work and i love spending my time with you”

at this point he was standing right in front of you. looking down into your eyes.

there was no hiding the redness flushing your skin

after a few moments of silence, you looked back down at your hands

he speaks again as if you two hadn’t spent the past minute just staring into each other’s eyes

“so what next? are you gonna keep sculpting me or are you gonna draw and paint a bit?”

“ummm ,,, i kinda want to just finish the sculpture so that i don’t have to worry about it ya know?”

“yeah. where is the light switch?”

“right by the corner near the door”

as he flipped on the switch and light once again flooded the room

you were able to get a good look at the sculpture

despite it not being finished, you were still incredibly happy and proud of it

you sat back down in front of it ready to finish the work

it only took another hour or two to finish once you really got back into it

you spent the bulk of the time adding in all the little details

and you also decided last minute to add a wreath atop his head and the top of a toga

you took a final step back before sighing in relief

you were finished

you almost wanted to cry

while you were staring at the piece doyoung got up to stand behind you and look at it as well

“wow y/n. it’s beautiful.”

“well it’s you so i hope it is.”

LOOK AT YOU. BEING BOLD. OKAAYYYY

before he could say anything else, you walked back to the sink and while washing your hands, asked his help to put it in another room to dry for a few days before it goes into the kiln

“it’ll take a while to dry so i’m going to leave it here and head to bed”

“okay well i can walk you back to your apartment”

“alrighty”

okay so you grabbed all your stuff (with his help because doyoung is too nice to just walk beside you as you try carry 4 different bags filled with art supplies)

the walk back was kind of uneventful

you invited him in to drop all your things off before he headed out, not until you thanked him for spending the day with you and being your subject

okay so 2 weeks pass

you and doyoung meet up a few times because you need him to model a few poses for your portfolio

but FINALLY you finished your portfolio and sculpture and turned it all in

since then you have been relaxing, getting ready for winter break

well “relaxing” is a loose term

tbh you had been kinda stressed over the scores you were going to get on the artwork

and today, the day before the quarter ends, your professor would be handing back your portfolio & sculpture with a score

you decided to text doyoung after getting dismissed from class

y/n: “hey i get the score for my art project back today. do you want to meet up and we can find out together?”

doyoung: “oh my gosh yes. but are you sure you want me to be there?”

y/n: “of course do. you were such a big part of this, i couldn’t leave you out of it. besides you haven’t seen the finished portfolio”

doyoung: “okay. same art room as last time?”

y/n: “yep. i’ll see you in 20”

you were nervous. as you waited in the room, your legs couldn’t stay still so you decided to pace in hopes of calming yourself down

or at least having something to do

when he walked into the room, your eyes met

there was no hiding the frantic look in them either

“hey y/n. do you have it?”

you pulled a card from inside the front of your portfolio and set it down on the table

doyoung’s voice was soft and calming as he walked up to you

“can i look at it?”

he picked up the large folder

in a large gold print:

PROMETHEUS, he dies everyday but wouldn’t wish for any other way to spend eternity

“you chose me to represent Prometheus? what’s his story”

you began to recount the tale as doyoung slowly flipped through pages of your artwork

·         “well he was the youngest of the titans, which were the creators of greek gods. it was said that he was also the kindest. when he looked upon the earth and saw how the humans were struggling, Prometheus felt pity and decided to give them a gift. he gave them a divine secret of the gods. he gave them fire. he did this despite knowing that Zeus would punish him if he found out. which he did. the other titans and gods were furious, so they tied him to a rock near the sea. every day an eagle would come and rip out prometheus’ liver and he would die. every night it would grow back bringing him back to life. this torturous routine goes on every day and night and according to the myth it continues until this day, as it will forever.”

as you finished the story doyoung closed the folder

all he said was “wow”

it made you nervous. “so ,,,,, do you like it?”

“y/n. this is beyond words. this is amazing. and you chose me?”

“well yeah i mean. you two just seemed to fit each other. you are the kindest person i know. you’re very generous too. so really it wouldn’t have worked if i had chosen anyone else or any other myth.”

he said nothing. just set down your work and hugged you.

you embraced each other. sharing this moment.

“y/n no matter the score on the other side of that car, just know that your work is beyond incredible. not just because it’s of me”

you both laughed before he continued

“seriously. you are an amazing artist. your art moves people. it makes me feel emotions that i haven’t felt in a while. it takes me on a journey.”

he pulled back and gave you one last smile before grabbing the card off of the table

“on 3”

“….1”

“….2”

“….3!”

a 97 was written in bright red marker

“oh my gosh y/n”

you two jumped back into each other’s arms

the smile on your face was ear to ear. there was no way it was going to fade any time soon

“I knew you could do it.”

“not without you i couldn’t have,” you say leaning back slightly, your arms still around his neck

he rolls his eyes at you

“seriously doyoung. if you hadn’t come by that day i don’t know what i would have done. you were my muse”

his arms were wrapped tightly around your waist

your eyes would have met if his weren’t staring at your lips right now

“y/n.” he whispered

“doyoung?”

“can i kiss you?”

“absolutely”

FUCKING FINALLY

ahem sorry I got a little excited for you

it was great. what can i say

it was everything you expected to be

before you thought that the whole “fireworks” thing was just movies overexaggerating

 but NOW you can attest to that

the kiss with doyoung had so much built up tension and caring and passion and just wowza

when you finally pulled apart

both of you were slightly out of breath

doyoung still had this cute, dumb smile plastered on his face

he gave you a few more pecks

which of course made you have a big dumb smile plastered on your face

you actually pulled apart and out of his arms this time and took a look at the score card

beneath your score the professor left a little note

“i hope you don’t mind but i emailed the art gallery about your work. they have a small exhibition open if you’d like to showcase your art. here’s the email: ­­­­­­_______. please consider it. you have serious talent.”

“an art gallery doyoung. an exhibition in an art gallery.”

tears fell down your face

this was an amazing opportunity

a dream came true

“i can come over tonight and we can email them.”

you just nodded your head

tbh you were still in shock

this was a huge opportunity

“so y/n. i know there is a lot going on right now but I can’t wait. will you be my girl/boy-friend?

“doyoung of course. can you help me take this stuff back to my apartment then if you want we can go grab something to eat?”

he nodded happily and grabbed the sculpture

THE END

goodness gracious that took a while

I hope you enjoyed reading this 5 thousand-word trainwreck

I know some of the stuff about creating sculptures isn’t accurate, but I need to make it work with the timeline I had in my head

I hope it didn’t bother anyone too much

but yeah

thanks for reading

also I didn’t proofread this so hopefully there aren’t many mistakes

if there are just message me and I’ll fix them

also also here’s a sequel type thing that doesn’t have to be seen as a sequel umm it isn’t as good as this one but here ya go

·         

[karak9]

Another stupid long post about how I don't know my own fucking gender

This is honestly just copied and pasted from a yt comment I made on an older vid and I figured I'd share it here bc tumblr loves this shit I guess lol. God damn I've been questioning my gender for so long and ik rn im prob not still in the best position to be thinking about deep life shit like where I am mentally and im dealing with a lot in my life and also very insecure about potentially being trans bc a lot of my friends don't seem like they would be very accepting and my bf is only really into girls. I asked him how he would feel if I was nonbinary or looked like a boy and he just said he wasn't totally sure but he's only attracted to girls :c he's the sweetest bf in existence and im honestly so afraid of losing him, so aside from obviously not wanting to deal with all the other trans shit, I definitely hope im not trans bc I don't wanna lose him. Anyways, ill start with my childhood I guess. I was always super tomboyish. My older sisters (im the youngest sibling btw) were always p tomboyish so maybe I kinda got it from them but I kinda felt like I was more tomboyish than them? I felt like I was the most boyish girl I knew, like even meeting other tomboy girls in elementary school I felt like I couldn't really relate to them or like they couldnt relate to me enough idk. I also remember once making up a song about being like so tomboyish that I was basically a boy or something along those lines and sang it to my best friend at the time who I copied like all the fkin time (it honestly wasnt healthy lmao I didn't have good parents, also I think I started making up songs bc she did that and I wanted to like impress her), but she thought it was stupid and weird so I just forgot about it and moved on. I was embarrassed to even enjoy playing with dolls or play dress up games online and was determined to play masculine games like runescape (even tho I ended up doing girly shit in runescape anyways lmao) and considered myself one of the guys. In 5th grade when I started needing to wear a bra I absolutely didn't want to, tho some girls in my class thought it was weird I didn't wear a bra when they found out and that made me more insecure about it, but since then I've p much only worn sports bras. I have bought some more normal bras bc I wanted to look attractive in them for my SO or whatever but I still highly prefer my sports bras and can't stand wearing the other ones unless I have to bc my sports bras aren't clean lmfao. I always hated talking about genitalia and breasts n shit but that could just be bc of how I was raised and how my family was always so strict and such radical Christians and anything sex related was a sin, idk if its dysphoria or not. I've never rlly liked my chest and hated showing cleavage like so god damn much and still do but maybe that's the same thing or maybe I just want smaller boobs and that's it idk??? Like I'd want to appear to have a completely flat chest at least, idk if I'd want to actually like have a guy chest or not? Also huge issue with ppl seeing me naked or touching my boobs but again idk if that's gender related or just a normal issue I have. Tho I had a friend in high school (a girl, a very weird lewd girl) who would occasionally grope my chest randomly and it wasn't a huge issue but kinda made me uncomfortable and more aware of my chest. I really like when I wear big hoodies or when I lean over so my shirt kinda poofs out and it looks like I have a flat chest underneath. Though im not super uncomfortable with my boobs, like normally ill want nothing to do with them but I don't mind my SO touching them especially if they're really into it. I wouldn't say im rlly dysphoric about between my legs either, like yeah I think its weird and I hate monthlies and stuff but I think that's normal. I think if i woke up one day and had a dick I would be fine with it, I'd prob even enjoy it tbh lmao. I once had a dream that i was, well, a male dog like,,, ya know, with a female dog, and not to sound weird af (hey we were both dogs ok) but I think i kinda enjoyed it? I don't really remember any other dreams where I remember actually having a dick or feeling it but I've had several dreams as a male person, but p much all of them were like, I was seeing through a character's eyes or smth, not really that I was a guy, so idk if that's normal. I have the same dreams about being other girl characters, I'd say its split about 50/50. Because of this game community im in, a lot of ppl assume im a guy, and a lot of people still think im a guy and I haven't really bothered to correct them but idk if I find it more enjoyable bc its funny or if I enjoy not being referred to as female for once. I'll admit I feel most comfortable referred to as they/them, like without a doubt, if I could go by only 1 set of pronouns for the rest of my life it would be they/them. But ik that's not enough to call myself trans. I definitely wouldn't want to be 100% male. Like if I imagine myself as a grown man vs a grown woman id prob choose to be a woman. I don't like my voice but I think that's mostly just bc I sound 10 years younger than I actually am, and wouldn't really want a deep/masculine voice. Like a "tomboy" voice would be fine if that makes sense? I don't want facial hair or want to have a masculine body, I like that I have curves and soft skin and small hands. Personally I like my hair long bc its soft and people love it, but sometimes I kinda wish I had short hair and could pass as a boy. Like I'd wanna be a typical cute kpop boy ngl lmfao. I like the whole cute androgynous/feminine boy look and wish I could pull it off. Tho I also like really girly things sometimes and am okay being seen as a girl, i just want to be cute and attractive. Ik whether im trans or not I like being a mix of feminine and masculine, tho I admit in the past I've been kinda insecure bc I used to be super sure I was nb and thought me liking girly things and wanting to still havd long hair and wear girly clothes made me seem like "not trans enough" or whatever. But i guess here I am questioning myself again anyways. If I am nb, it sucks that ill never really be able to be openly myself and all but I've accepted by now that I kinda have to pick a binary and choose what I want to be seen as for the rest of my life, and im ok with being female. There are some things I dont like about my body whether they're really gender related or not but I can't afford to transition and wouldn't like most of the effects of T and am afraid of surgery and not sure I want top surgery enough to ever get it anyways, but I think if we lived in a perfect world and I could magically change my body at will and I wasnt afraid of judgment or being unattractive or whatever, I'd probably want to look androgynous and itd be cool to be able to change my genitalia at will lmao. If I had to choose 1 genitalia over the over I honestly have no idea what I'd choose but I have no desire to ever get bottom surgery, at the same time tho I honestly wanna someday get surgery or w/e to never be able to get pregnant. I just could not handle pregnancy or giving birth and I don't even like babies and breast feeding sounds awful so if I ever have kids they will be adopted 100% and most likely be older and like not newborn babies lmfao, babies are honestly so weird to me and they stink and cry and they're so fragile and im so afraid of like dropping them when I hold them lmao. But I like my nieces and nephews and I like being the cool aunt (is there a gender neutral version of aunt/uncle?) who lets them use my art supplies and helps them do fun stuff even if I get tired of them sometimes lol. Idk if that's gender related either but yeah I guess. This if kind of a more recent thing but I often say I'd make a great bf kinda as a joke bc of how I am in relationships like being the stereotypical sweet bf type who makes things for their partner a lot and wants to be their knight in shining armor and their protector and all that, but again prob not rlly trans related lmao just thought I'd throw that out there I guess. So when I was 17 was when I really started getting into trans stuff, prior to that I mostly just learned from my parents that trans ppl were "against god" and all that bs, and eventually started realizing lgbt+ isn't as bad as my family said and later realized I was bi. But anyways I met an agender person online when i was 17ish and I'd never heard it before and thought it was really interesting and asked them how you know you're agender bc after hearing their explanation of it i thought it described how I felt, but ofc they weren't transmed and just described it as being like a deep feeling or whatever and since then i started calling myself agender (and switched between a few labels but basically nonbinary) until my transmed friend told me I was ridiculous and that I wasn't trans, and honestly he was a huge dick but im a huge pushover lmao and I thought well he's trans so he must know what he's talking about, and though I felt discouraged about it I stopped calling myself nonbinary. Then I began questioning it again after not too long and basically since then I've been questioning my gender off and on. I'm now 22 and god I fucking hope im cis but also I feel like a part of me doesn't want to be cis if that makes sense?? Idk if that's because I don't like being a girl for some weird deep reason I don't know about despite being pretty sure I've gotten a lot of my feelings and their reasons behind them figured out, or if it's because I am trans and dont want to force myself to pretend im a girl 100% forever. At the very least, whatever the fuck my gender is, I want to continue going by they\them wherever I can and pretending to be a boy to strangers online and I'd love to cosplay male characters and bind and occasionally just dress masculine for the hell of it and probably wear sports bras for the rest of my life. I feel like in a way I cang possibly be trans because I can live with all of those things and be fairly comfortable still being seen as female for the rest of my life. But idk, I have bpd and other mental shit so sometimes im not great with my feelings (tho I do try really hard to identify all of my feelings/emotions and stuff) but at the same time bpd can cause weird identity shit so maybe its just a weird mix of a bunch of crap and im not actually trans but just weird and tomboyish enough to question my gender for 5 years and still be unsure. Also I know a lot of ppl suggest talking to a therapist/psychologist/whatever professional and trust me I would love to but I can't currently and am unsure when ill be able to bc they're expensive and I live in the middle of fucking nowhere so finding a decent therapist around where I live rn is going to be very difficult. Also, I have fucking crippling social anxiety lmao like I'd be so afraid to open up about this stuff even to a professional. So if anyone could suggest anything online that could help that would be amazing

[flamewyrmz]

a late night rant from twitter im putting in one place, because its a trainwreck of several threads there. mostly copy/paste and still not proofread, but a collection of thoughts on gender, sexuality, personal identity, and love and support within the lgbtq community. i do really lay myself bare here so id like to ask that if you disagree or have criticism you do so respectfully and with that in mind, thank you <3 and if this means something to you itd mean the world to me if you shared it

dunno if ive said this here before but like. if you think you might be bi/pan but youre on the fence cos maybe youve never had a crush on a nonfictional guy or get more crushes on guys than on girls and you find yourself tied up in knots like "well im gay but im also attracted to nonbinary people unless theyre mostly woman-aligned but i dont wanna say im bi/pan because then people will think i like girls and like i like them theoretically but--" let go. just say fuck it! im bi/pan! 

try it out and if it doesnt feel right it doesnt feel right and thats fine and in the end no matter what youll have learned a little about yourself. this is actually my advice on any gender/sexuality dilemmas you might be having. go wild. try it out. see how it feels. dont feel like you have to confine yourself to something just because youve stuck with it for some amount of time. 

if youre questioning dive right into the deep end! no matter how it goes youll be a better swimmer in the end. its all not quite rigid and a little fluid anyways (for some more than others obv) so if youre unsure, man... go for it. its ok to backpedal

--

this is important advice to me because ive struggled with it multiple times in the past and this has only recently clicked and i really wish it had sooner. first it was with being... not straight in general. like i was actively dating someone of the same gender and i never considered that that meant, uh, im not straight. always "do you like boys or girl?" "uhhhhhhhhh. uh. UH" 

then with being in the range of aro/ace spect. then with being nonbinary! then with being nb but primarily male. and then goddammit im just a boy. accepting that God I Love Men And Only Men (and with it that i *wasnt* aro or ace in ANY capacity) and then, very recently (like up until a couple months ago. like im p sure this year. not 2017), going back on that and admitting i was bi. it is so so freeing to just say "fuck it" and test those waters!

hell, you find something you resonate with but looks a little silly? go for it! use those bun/buns/bunself pronouns. go with stargender! ace-flux demibiromantic? hell yeah rock that shit! it can always change and you can always decide its not right and go back! h4y dudes

--

all of that especially goes for teens who dont know what the fuck theyre doing. im only 20 yea and barely 20 at that but man i wish id heard this sooner

and please dont take that as me saying "well if youre a lesbian sexuality is fluid and maybe youre actually bi"! hell no. if youre a lesbian and you KNOW youre and lesbian and couldnt ever be anything else then rock on you funky little lesbian! but if you id as a lesbian but are teetering on something like "well im attracted to some fictional and theoretical men but not any real ones and maybe its just compulsory heterosexuality but im not sure and--" dont be afraid to try a different label. its all what feels right to you and theres absolutely no harm

--

people bash on like. """mogai genders""" and nounself pronouns and the split attraction model and all that and like. yeah! those things can hurt people! personally i struggled with the split attraction bit combined with how broadly people define the ace spectrum. it can be used to hurt. and it is used to hurt. sometimes its deliberate, sometimes its not. but the hurt is there. but its not inherently good or bad. 

and yeah, some of it sounds silly. hell, it sounds silly to me sometimes! but to some people hearing that label makes everything click into place, even if just for a little bit, and i take that very seriously. it is one of the best feelings in the world and i want as many lgbtq people (of any age) to experience it. 

for some people it feels right to zoom waaaaaaay in and section it into lots of little bits and for others its "fuck it! i dont know shit! im just queer!" and those are both equally valid (that words been thru 12 garbage disposals but i cant think of a better one) maybe you go back n forth and thats fine too! as long as youre open to it changing or being wrong it cant hurt and, like i said, its one of the best possible feelings to have it click like that

--

as an aside: being bi can *totally* mean "im attracted to men and nonbinary people are long are they arent primarily woman-aligned" or it can mean "im attracted to everyone fuck it" personally? i use bi over pan because i feel like it better encapsulates that i *do* have preferences (i say this all the time but God I Love Men) but ultimately gender doesnt really matter to me cos everyones cute and hot and generally attractive and im not leaving anyone out because im just a little more inclined to kissing boys. but thats me!

--

as Another aside: i do still to some degree identify with uhh this is gonna sound contradictory but agender boy? or more like boy agender? boygender with left none? i just dont personally feel like its worth taking the time to explain over n over. but it used to be, for me, n i dont regret that a single bit! i wouldnt regret that even if i *didnt* still feel that way in any capacity. honestly? 

i dont regret any of the ways ive identified in the past even though feeling stuck and cornered into some got a little harmful to me (and if youve gone through somethin similar and DO regret it and wish youd never heard whatever term you used thats good too. im very strongly advocating for "use whatever labels you want and if it dont fit it dont fit" here but if they did hurt you and youre still hurting about it i understand 100% just dont use it to pull others down. if it concerns you say your piece and let them decide)

--

this is personally a little hard to admit so bear with me here 

honestly? ANY sort of strong identity didnt start developing in me until i was.... 14 or so? and very slowly at that. like gender evened out around 18 and sexuality just a few months ago LMAO. but up until i was a teenager i didnt really feel much of anything re: gender or attraction (and the attraction thing is pretty normal for kids and even teens tbqh!) 

and i just.... didnt really think about it! i had This Name and apparently was a girl and i didnt really get what it was like to BE a girl but thats what people said and i didnt know there were other options so i went with it! the name didnt bother me either (except for when people made jokes about a Certain Historical Figure with the same one. just thinking about that i get tired) 

and when it came time to actually grapple with the whole concept of being *into* people i just kinda... slunk away! no joke until like 10th grade if someone started a rumor that i was dating x or y had a crush on me i would start to avoid them entirely. lost a friend in 4th grade that way but then in hs hed turned into a TOTAL DICK so no loss there. i think part of that was also people making the assumption that i was straight though? big shrug! 

i didnt even realize attraction was a thing i had until i got asked out and just kind of "oh wow??? that sounds so nice??? i feel the same??? yes??" and thats WHY i went thru varying aro/ace labels. cos it unfolded slowly (which again is totally normal if youre a teenager, so dont worry about it if youre going thru that. roll with the punches. and if youre a teen and youve got it figured out? thats totally normal too!) 

and the gender thing was similar once i learned that it was an actual possibility (especially being nb, and ESPECIALLY especially being agender) i slowly just... poked at it until i figured something out (fun fact: what set me off to finally go "fuck it im not a girl at all" was being stuck in an awful hair salon chair while my mom got a haircut that took FOREVERRRRRRRRR and i was having godawful period cramps. like i knew not being a girl wouldnt DO anything about them but i made that decision then n there n didnt look back!) 

and then i kept pokin at it and watching it like the seed id planted finally started to sprout and i realized i didnt actually know what kind of seed it WAS. i guess ive always been very nebulous in those aspects and its just now forming into something solid. like i said, its a little hard to admit and i... dont think ive actually talked about this in this depth before to, like, anyone? 

because the "oh ive always known" narrative is the only one you ever see in popular media and sometimes even from the community itself! and theres nothing wrong with having always known! but theres also nothing wrong with being like me! but i still feel a little anxious talking about it like it somehow means im a sham. 

hell, id even go so far as to say i WAS a girl as a kid! i WAS varying shades of agender and nonbinary and ???? as a teen, and i AM, like, 95% a guy right now! maybe in a few years ill be something else. none of those things contradict each other. things like that can change! its not set in stone (but like i said: for some people it is! or, like, set in slime that you left out for 5 years so now its pretty much a rock but if you really try it still squishes into something else?? none of these things invalidate the others! were all unique). 

i wouldnt say that at any point ive been cis or straight, cos even when i just went with being a girl and stuff it was always a little ??? but, yknow. even if i HAD been those things at some point it wouldnt matter to me? things just are the way they are and were the way they were

--

im making myself really vulnerable here and my thought process is a mess and i ramble and repeat myself and my memory and attention span is like 2 seconds and i dont proofread but. its important i think. i dont have a lot of followers and fewer still thatre active but... that really doesnt matter. 

maybe someone will retweet at least one of these messy, messy threads. maybe link it to a friend. maybe screenshot it and post it on tumblr [note: LMAO YEAH AND ITS YOU DUMBASS], or to keep for themself. if any of my words help anyone out even a little then it matters and honestly? then its the most important thing in the whole danged world. if even one person sees any of the things ive said tonight and it means *anything* to them, even if just "oh, im not alone in this" then ive succeeded here. 

i dont want any of us to ever feel trapped or alone because shit! lifes too fuckin short for that! its goddamn hard being anything but cisgender and straight! sometimes it sucks! like really sucks! there have been so many times ive broken down completely over being trans and felt like, for myself, its the most awful thing in the world. its why prides so important. its why community is so important. 

because even when the pressure of the world brings you down so low you think youll never escape theres something or someone there to take your hand and pull you back up, put you on your feet, and say "i know its hard. and itll get hard again. but i believe in you, and youre strong enough for this, and im here with you through every step". that goes for anyone but especially goes for us. and im not just talking about lgbtq youth here. all of us. which is *why* im laying myself completely bare here. 

most of this stuff? ive either never talked about or only vaguely mentioned. but im putting it out there. because there was a point where i needed it but didnt have it, and even if its just one person, i want to give someone this advice so at least they dont have to deal with the same stuff i did. and if youre reading this? i love you. im here for you. im my dms are always open and if for some reason they arent its almost definitely an accident and if you say something ill reopen them. 

and if youre someone who hates me? maybe even mutually? if it came down to it id let you come to me at your lowest moment, no questions asked, no judgement held, and at the end of it still be the same kind of enemies we were before and never speak again. there are some exceptions of course but honestly ill forgive a lot for someone who needs that kind of support. and if youre one of the people this applies to, i know youll probably never take me up on it. i dont expect you to. i dont expect you to even for a second be comfortable with that idea. thats fine. but if for some reason you ever need it, its there. 

i can count on one hand the ex friends that i wouldnt give that to and thats ONLY because theyve legitimately hurt me and left lasting damage (and for some of them? its mutual. and im sorry for that, regardless of how i feel about your treatment of me im truly sorry for my actions. that probably sounds fake and anyway i digress) 

and if youre a complete stranger? someone who follows me but has never interacted with anything ive posted? a mutual i havent spoken to yet? im here. and im bumbling, and awkward, and not the best at comfort but you can always come to me if you need someone. im only one man and im under a lot of stress but i swear ill do the best i can, even if its only reading and replying 3 days later and even then just listening and offer whatever gentle comfort or reassurance youll accept. 

because thats important to me. thats the impact i want to leave on this world. i dont ever want anyone to feel as small, as scared, as worthless, as alone as i have. im no fighter. im not going to lead any revolutions and hell im too anxious to even go to protests but im here for support. im here to help and heal. and thats important too

--

and if you listened to that? thank you. if you just skimmed? thank you for that too. if you shared it with someone? thank you (so much). and if you dont? thank you anyways, just for the time

just know this: i love you. i dont care who you are, if youre reading this i love you and im behind you 100%. im here if you need it. stay strong, do something that makes you smile if only for a moment. take that leap of faith. dont restrict yourself for even a second

i meant to go to bed at least two hours ago so goodnight <3 be safe, drink some water, if you have any kind of pet give it some love. take care of yourself. youre the most important person in your own world and never forget that, even if you dont think you are. even if theres something or someone you treasure above everything else. dont diminish your own worth! you are alive, and you are here, and theres nothing more important than that, really. the things you love matter more than anything else. hold them close

[tumblunni]

Tagged by @branch-chief--faba!

RULES: answer the questions and tag 15 blogs you want to know better.

Nicknames: Bunni, Dan (irl)

Star Sign: Libra

Height: I dont think ive measured my height since i was a teenager, but around 5′6″ or 5′7″ or something? average height i guess

Time Right Now: 15:45

Last thing I Googled: “Endellion” cos its the username someone had in a game or something that was on my dash, and i wanted to know what the name means cos its cool. Apparantly its the name of a saint?

Last Movie I Watched: rewatching Finding Dory and CRYING AGAIN

Last TV Show I watched: Black Butler Book Of Circus, and before that it was ERASED/The Town Without Me. My picky side is so frustrated that the dub changed a cool name into something generic as hell :P

When did I create this blog: cant really remember, is tehre any way to find out? a fair few years I think, i cant recall if it was just after i ran away from home or just before?

Why I choose my URL: I’m bad at remembering stuff so I tend to use the same username and same password everywhere. (Tho spelling the password differently just in case. But cos bad memory i end up having to roll thru every single spelling every time I log in XD) Bunni89 was just the first username I had as a nine year old and it stuck. I wanted to be Bunny cos... it was the name of my plush rabbit doll. And my fave animal in general. I’m not very creative! And then the ‘lets spell it internet speak’ bit and the random number was just to try and find a version of bunny that wasnt already taken. Then I’ve just used that username for the next 15 years and its stuck so much that its even kinda my irl nickname now! Aaaand then just tumblunni because puns.

Gender: agender/nonbinary

Hogwards House: Slytherin cos i always feel sorry for anyone generically written off as a villain for stupid reasons, hufflepuff is probably more likely cos i have no special traits except being huggable.

Pokemon Team:  I try and have a different one each generation, like Ash. But i still keep all my previous teams pride of place in a special box in each game and I love doing postgame stuff and minigames with them. I get really attatched to my mons! I’m so guilty feeling that I lost two mons from my unova playthrough during the transfer bck and forth from friends’s games back when i didnt have a DS for a few years. my poor samurott and leavanny... :( Anyway, my current team in sun and moon is primarina, mimikyu, goloisipod, alola raichu, alola muk and lurantis! I wanted to have a drampa but i bought sun by accident instead of moon. And I also really like mareanie and that mossy anchor pokemon but they were so impossible to find that i only got them late in the postgame. I actually fished up an anchor friend myself but i had to trade for a mareanie :P

Favourite Colour: blue! and just the general aesthetic of black and white with one bright colour highlighting small details. thats a cool!

Lucky Number: 74 is my favourite number!

Favourite Character: TRESH GROMP GROOMPLE GRIMPLES GREMPY GROO y’all know who it be, i am not able to be silent about my faves aaaaand I have a bunch of other obscure minor character villain faves in other fandoms too, and just generally i am lame

Number of Blankets: Two, and a sleeping bag sometimes cos weather is so cold lately. We had like one unbearably hot day and then straight back to ice!

Name: Dan

Birthday: October 12th

Siblings: A half sister I havent seen in a decade... i hope she’s okay...

Favorite Smell: I have a really bad sense of smell and generally i can only smell really strong bad smell,s alas. Tho i do think gasoline smells nice and thats such an EVIL TRAP cos its all deadly gross fumes n stuff!

Pets: Had a cat, rabbit, fish and hamster as a kid, but havent had another pet for years. i really wanna someday be able to take care of one on my own!

Wake Up: consistancy is for the weak

Sleep: see previous question

Type of phone: i have no idea what this phone is, i dont know anything about phones. its some super cheap super bad touchscreen thingie i got in a christmas sale for twenty bucks

Love or Lust: aromantic asexual here giving a big ol shrug at this question

Lemonade or Tea: Lemonade. I am the worst brit, i hate tea XD

Cats or Dogs: Cats

Coke or Pepsi: Coke

Day or Night: Night

Text or Call: Text

Make up or natural: no makeup aaaa its a sticky face prison

Met a Celebrity: nope

Smile or Eyes: ??? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN. how can you compare the two. im just imagining someone smiling and their mouth is full of eyes. WHY DID YOU INSERT THIS IMAGE INTO MY BRAINMEATS

Light or Dark Hair: having dark hair is annoying when you wanna dye it, so i’ll go with light hair just for the practicality 
 Shorter or Taller: oh was all this meant to be about what you find sexy in someone instead of yourself?? cos im average height and i already answered that... 
 Intelligence or Attraction: wait this is a question about what you find most attractive so how does that make sense. unless it isnt...?? thing you most want to be: intelligence or sexyness? well i want everything except sexyness so there u go. 
 Chapstick or Lipstick: havent used either in over a decade 
 City or Country: both have their own good and bad points, ive had different social anxieties living in both :P 
 Last Song Heard: this cool amv for a movie i love pointless fact: it was legit made by the same director and animation team as the first digimon movie, its like the version of the script he wished he could have done as its own property. he also made wolf children!

Fruit or Vegetables: Froooooot

Anime or Cartoons: I like both in different ways. Mostly I just like a certain sort of story/art style/character lineup/etc and i like it no matter which genre it appears in. And i tend to really like the stuff that takes inspiration from both genres cos it seems they’re more likely to have that sort of stuff! Combining all the goodness! 
 Phone Case: wait you can buy cases for phones?? 
 Showers or Baths: showers are conveinient, baths are lazy. depends on how bad my day has been! 
 Dream Job: i dont have any dreams really, im a weirdo. ive never been able to find one. at best i flip through a few current hobbies and have a vague idea that it could be fun to be paid for doing them, but its never a really huge interest and i never try and work towards it cos i know im flaky and ive changed my mind a million times before. I hope someday i can find something that just clicks and i wanna do it forever!

Milk and Cookies or Doughnuts and Coffee: WAIT YOU EAT DONUTS WITH COFFEE?? WHY?? donuts are already soggy! thats weird! milk n cookies forever yo. or donuts on their own, but donuts are too sugary for me, i can never eat more than one without feeling sick.

[belladxne]

RWBY FINALE REACTION

i’ve been so anxious for the past 47 minutes i thought i was past this

i actually made it through the entire opening without it stopping to buffer even once so this might bode well for being able to watch the episode without constantly being forced to pause

HEY TOM GET YOUR GRIMY HANDS AWAY FROM QROW LEAVE HIM  A L O N E

someone made an interesting point about nucklavees being from norse mythology, kinda interesting that the major attacks we’ve seen have involved nora (thor) and qrow (huginn or muginn) as its victims.

i don’t... actually get what qrow grabbing jaune was about there? i just saw a lot of eyerolling and glaring. can you two chill.

JAUNE AND BLAKE BOTH WITH THEIR FUCKING ‘YEAH MY SHEATH IS A SWORD’ BULLSHIT Y’ALL KNOW THAT DEFEATS THE INTENDED USE OF A SHEATH RIGHT

i mean i know i agreed with crystal that the rider’s name is tom and the mount’s name is tim but actually like. i mean. look at this fight. his name is absolutely Fuckarms McMike.

jESUS DONT SCARE ME LIKE THAT THERE WAS A LEGITIMATE HALF A SECOND I THOUGHT NORA GOT HURT

omfg “STOP LOOKING” and ren’s sudden “WAIT NO I WASN’T LOOKING UP YOUR SKIRT I SWEAR”

JFHSGHS NO YOU LEAVE HER AURA THE FUCK ALONE. SHE’S NOT ALLOWED TO GET HURT. I’LL KILL YOU I’LL KILL YOUR MOM I’LL KILL YOUR WHOLE FAMILY.

nice to see ren as panicked and determined as i am

fuck ren your determination to save your girlfriend got you fresh out of aura what a backfire (NO BUT IM CRYIN HE WAS JUST SO DETERMINED TO NOT LET THIS THING TAKE THE LAST FAMILY HE HAD LEFT AFTER IT KILLED THE REST)

OMG THE SAME HOUSE SHE TACKLED HIM UNDER THE SAME HOUSE THEY HID UNDER AS KIDS

tbh yes slap some sense into him babe

skjgbskjghjsgh the fucking. him seeing her as she was all those years ago, and then blinking to see her now IM HONESTLY GONNA DIE.

I’m really happy to see Ruby calling out the strategy. I liked that they decided to emphasize Jaune’s role as a strategist by having the others regard him as one, but I do miss Ruby calling the shots, because she’s very good at it.

Nora is genuinely the cutest thing I’ve ever seen her smug grin as she just FALLS OFF A RIDICULOUSLY HIGH ROOF WITH NO AURA.

“For myself.” !!!! I !!! AM !!! GOING !!! TO !!! DIE !!! I !!! LOVE !!! REN !!! MY !!! SON !!! AND I’M SO PROUD OF HIS DEVELOPMENT !!!

Qrow I’m gonna have to ask you to stop talking because if you’re conscious enough to talk you’re conscious enough to have some last words and I’M NOT GIVING YOU PERMISSION TO DIE

She’s so proud I’m crying.

WAIT A SECOND TIM AND TOM BEEN OUT DESTROYING EVERYTHING EVERY CITY EVERYWHERE FOR LIKE AT LEAST A DECADE, EVEN RICH PEOPLE CITIES, AND NO ONE HAS KILLED IT IN ALL THAT TIME, ALL THE FULL CITIES COMBATING IT, BUT FOUR KIDS JUST FUCKED IT UP? I’m sorry but where is their trillion dollar reward. Where is it. This Nucklavee has the blood of probably hundreds if not thousands on its hands at this point, no one could stop it, and these four just saved countless more cities. Pay them.

Okay guys this is a real happy moment and I have some hope that my husband might survive but let’s just consider what’s going on here:

Hopeful moment.

Episode’s only half over.

They have reached Haven.

Episode title is “No Safe Haven”

Fuck

How wrong are things going to go?

RENORA GOT A PRIVATE AIRSHIP ALL TO THEMSELVES AND SQUISHY MUSIC OH GOD

MY BABIES ARE CUDDLING I’M HONESTLY SCREAMING

last time one of my otps held hands and cuddled it was a precursor to one kissing the other and dying so like. this is a little weirdly reminiscent.

UGH THIS RUBY AND QROW MOMENT IS HONESTLY GOING TO KILL ME MORE THAN ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING ELSE. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. OH MY GOD, I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND THE WAY SHE’S LOOKING AFTER HIM LIKE HE ALWAYS LOOKED AFTER HER LIKE SUMMER PROBABLY ALWAYS LOOKED AFTER HIM. I’M GOING TO DIE. I’M GOING TO DIE.

I know that when I’m with you I’m at home.

Omg is Weiss stowing away. My video stopped loading at “but if we get cau---”.

Honestly? I’m so happy that she’s choosing to seek out Winter. Just... the notion of these two girls getting out of an abusive situation and finding each other outside of it and learning how to heal and have a healthy family relationship together is so important to me.

!!!! WHICH VERSION OF THE PHOTO DO YOU GUYS THINK YANG HAS---HER DAD’S, OR SUMMER’S? IS TAIYANG LOOKING AT HIS OWN OLD COPY OR AT SUMMER’S OLD COPY?

Honestly? Jaune’s tiny smile when he looks up at Ren and Nora is everything to me.

BLAKE’S LITTLE SMILE AT SUN I’M GENUINELY GONNA CRY. Also, the way she pulls out the old flag, lowers it, and he’s behind it. Like, he’s what the old Fang was always supposed to be. Good, and kind, despite not putting up with any shit and always, always pushing for what was right and what he believed in.

NONBINARY FIRST MATE IS BACK I LOVE THEM

God, Cinder, you’ve got issues.

The people we haven’t lost yet. c’:

LIKE UNCLE QROW, MY HUSBAND, STILL KICKIN’.

“Hey... aren’t I normally the one saving you?” PRECIOUS

WHY DID THEY PUT ‘BANDITS’ ON A FUCKING SIGN. LIKE, “HEY, ANY HUNTSMEN OR LAW ENFORCEMENT IN THE AREA WHO MAYBE HAVE A BOUNTY ON SOME SHITTY BANDITS, DO YOU NEED TO KNOW WHERE TO FIND US? HERE’S OUR ADDRESS. FIGHT ME.”

Yang was definitely facing Mistral and didn’t seem to turn, so that’s probably where she’s going, which is good, but I don’t think seeing her mom would have delayed her that much.

“I really think things are going to start going our way” YOU SINGLEHANDEDLY JINXED EVERYTHING GOOD JOB

I haven’t yet seen the after credits scene but, all in all, this was a surprisingly good finale for a season I’ve had plenty of issues with.

Listen not to detract from lil homie talking to Qrow but like. Where is the bartender in this place?

PIPSQUEAK, MY HUSBAND IS SUCH A LITTLE SHIT

omg he smiled so immediately. I’m gonna assume Ozpin must have given him the lowdown on everything, then?

“It’s good to see you again, Oz.” I hope it’s a legitimate plot point for Oscar that he doesn’t want to just be treated like Ozpin. Just bc the dude’s in his head and they’re literally fused as in share-the-same-soul fused, he’s still an individual, still a kid, and he’s got a right to go about this on his own terms.

Anyways actually I’m pretty excited for his arc?

[partlycharlie-archive]

gender? who is she? (they???)

chapter two: hey, uh . dad? link to prologue link to chapter one

summary: papa,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, oooOoOoo,,,,,,,,didn't MEAN to make you CRY (thaaaaank fuck i didn't!!!!!!!) word count: 1,796 warnings: coming out a/n: yeet yeet comin out bois

read on ao3

[SUNDAY; 10.21.18]

  harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

 [14:06] harry?: luna luna luna

[14:15] luna!: hello harry! what is it you wish to talk about?

[14:16] harry?: i think im gonna come out 2 dad

[14:19] luna!: oh wonderful! i wish you the best of luck, harry. do you know if you will come out to your mother, as well?

[14:20] harry?: oh shit [14:20] harry?: nah i dont think so [14:20] harry?: im a little more scared abt her than i am abt dad [14:20] harry?: idk y lol

[14:21] luna!: okay! that’s perfectly fine, harry. you only have to go to the limits that you are comfortable with! <3

[14:21] harry?: tyyy <3

 ---

 “Hey, dad?”

“Yeah? What’s up, Su?” James settles into the chair across from his daughter, who is sitting (with the worst posture ever - he really needs to start reminding her to keep her back straight, even if that’s the only part of her that’ll ever be straight) slumped over the table. As he speaks, she props her head into the palm of one hand to look him in the eye.

“Do you know what the word nonbinary means?”

He raises an eyebrow and frowns, considering. “A number that’s not a power of two?” he tries, offering a cautious smile.

She snorts with a quirk of her lips. “Close, but not quite.” She starts to pull out the pins holding her hijab together, placing them in a small bag in front of her. The layers of the scarf unravel around her face.

“It, uhm, well. It kind of means someone that doesn’t feel like a girl or a boy? I guess you could say that nonbinary people are, like, in between being a girl or a boy, even though I’m pretty sure some people don’t feel like that? Like agender people, y’know? I mean, I’m pretty sure they fall under the term of ‘nonbinary’ or ‘genderqueer’ or whatever, but they don’t really have a gender? I guess? Yeah.”

She’s rambling, pulling the sleeves of her shirt down so that they wrap around her fingertips in that way she always does when she’s nervous.

Huh. She’s nervous.

He tilts his head. “That makes sense, yeah. Why bring it up? Is it part of your homework?” He can’t help but notice the way her shoulders noticeably relax when he confirms what she’s saying.

“No, but - uh. I think I might be? Nonbinary, I mean?” She curls in on herself, shoulders hunching in towards her chest as if she expects some sort of rejection. One of the layers of her hijab covers her expression.

He raises an eyebrow. “Okay, cool. What does this mean, then?” James’ tone is filled with relaxed confusion, and he watches with the tiniest of smiles as Sumaya lights up, breathing in deeply.

“Oh! Yeah, okay.” She cuts herself with a shaky hand wiping itself across her mouth. She starts fidgeting again, pulling at the strings of her scarf and rubbing the skin of her thumb and index fingers together.

“So, uh, maybe different pronouns? I can explain that to you later, hah. And- uh, I’ve been thinking about a new name, maybe? I’m not sure about it, but. Definitely a consideration.” The words fly out of her mouth like spitfire, each one landing in front of him as if she were afraid they’d burn her tongue if she didn’t speak fast enough.

“Huh. Okay. I mean - I get what pronouns are, no need to explain that, but I’m guessing you wouldn’t want to use guy pronouns-”

“He-him. That’s what you’d say.” She replies instantly; it sounds like a reflex. “Sorry.”

James smiles softly. “No need to apologize, love. He-him, okay - so you wouldn’t use that because you don’t… feel like a guy, right?”

Sumaya nods hesitantly.

“But not she-her, either, because you’re not a girl.”

Another nod.

James’ eyes flicker around the room as he considers this, and he misses the shaky breath Sumaya lets out. “Okay. So what pronouns would you use, then? Not ‘it’ or anything like that, right? Because that seems kind of, uhm. Dehumanizing.”

She laughs, just a bit, and her shoulders relax from the subconsciously hunched position they were in before. She pushes the remains of her hijab down so that they rest around her neck. “No,” she corrects with a smile. “That’s only for inanimate objects, I’m pretty sure. I would use they-them, probably.”

“Huh. That’s not… singular, though, is it? Correct me if I’m wrong, obviously, but isn’t that pronoun only used for a group of people?” She - they - laugh.

“Nah, it’s been used as a single-person pronouns since, like, the 1500’s; it just hasn’t really been recognized until recently. You can look up the timeline, it’s actually pretty cool. But, uh. Yeah.”

James scrubs his face with his hands. “Okay. It might take a little while for me to get used to it - feel free to correct me if I fuck up, pardon my French - but thanks for telling me, hun.” He smiles in a way that he hopes is reassuring, and Sumaya lets out a shuddering breath, looking vaguely like they’re about to cry.

“Whoa- whoa, what’s up, love? What’s wrong?” He leans forward in response to grasp one of Sumaya’s hands that lays, stationary, on the table. They shake their head quickly, breathing in another stuttered breath.

“No, I just. Fuck. I’m so happy, I’m sorry, I know it’s dumb, I was just so worried, god, I’m sorry, I’m just so happy,” she they ramble, using their free hand to wipe away the tears threatening to spill from their eyes.

“Aww, love, that’s okay.” He stands up, careful not to dislodge his hand from their tight grip, and walks around the table to envelop her in the tightest hug he can manage.

“I love you,” they whisper.

“I love you too.”

 ---

  harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

 [17:06] harry?: LUNA I DID IT OH MY GOD FUCK

[17:15] luna!: you did what, harry? [17:15] luna!: oh my goodness! congratulations, harry! i’m so proud of you, love.

[17:16] harry?: I CANT BELIEVE I DID IT SLFNEISLNFKESN FUCK [17:16] harry?: I CRIED BUT IT WAS OKAY [17:16] harry?: HES OKAY WITH IT [17:16] harry?: FUCK [17:18] harry?: fuck [17:18] harry?: hes [17:18] harry?: hes okay with it oh my god hes okay with it

[17:20] luna!: <3

  everybody but sumaya [longbottom (NevilleLongbottom), parkinson (PansyParkinson), weasley_2 (GinnyWeasley), lovegood (LunaLovegood), weasley_1 (RonWeasley)…]

 [17:22] lovegood: hello @everyone ! [17:22] lovegood: i would appreciate it if you all would send your congratulations to sumaya!

[17:23] weasley_1: for what ?

[17:23] lovegood: i’m afraid i can’t say, but rest assured the congratulations are deserved.

[17:23] zabini: bet

  blaise (BlaiseZabini), su (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] blaise: yo congrats

[17:23] su: ????? [17:23] su: 4 wht

[17:23] blaise: idk bro just congrats

[17:24] su: ok

  tinychild (GinnyWeasley), onlychild (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] tinychild: hey yo congrats on whatever just happened

[17:24] onlychild: ?????? thanks ??????????? [17:24] onlychild: wtf

[17:25] tinychild: i dont know

  ibelieveicanfly (SumayaPotter), ibelieveicantouchthesky (NevilleLongbottom)

 [17:23] ibelieveicantouchthesky: congratulations!

[17:24] ibelieveicanfly: what the FUCK [17:24] ibelieveicanfly: y r yall congratulating me ???????

[17:24] ibelieveicantouchthesky: i’m not sure, but i’m sure whatever you did was amazing.

[17:25] ibelieveicanfly: csdkjrhoewsdnck okay,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  motherfucker (HermioneGranger), bitchass (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] motherfucker: Hey why did Luna just ask me to congratulate you

[17:25] bitchass: IT WAS HER????? [17:25] bitchass: ofc it was that sweet hoe

  luna! (LunaLovegood), harry? (SumayaPotter)

 [17:26] harry?: luna

[17:28] luna!: yes, harry?

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!! [17:28] harry?: sry forgot abt that 4 a sec

[17:28] luna!: no need to apologize, harry!

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [17:28] harry?: okay im fine [17:28] harry?: anyway [17:29] harry?: did u ask all of our friends to congratulate me

[17:29] luna!: yes! [17:29] luna!: even if they don’t know why they are congratulating you, i thought it would still be a nice feeling to have them be proud of you. [17:29] luna!: also, it is a nice demonstration of their trust in both me and you, harry. [17:29] luna!: me, because they trusted me enough to know that i was not lying! [17:30] luna!: and you, because i’m sure most of them said something along the lines of “i’m sure whatever you did was worthy of my praise” when you inevitably asked them why they were congratulating you for seemingly no good reason!

[17:31] harry?: omg [17:31] harry?: ilysm [17:31] harry?: god ur fuckin right too jfc [17:31] harry?: u absolute blessing u [17:31] harry?: srsly tho thank you luna tht was rly nice of u

[17:31] luna!: of course! [17:32] luna!: i love you too, harry. <3

 ---

  the Tea TM [f (FredWeasley), g (GeorgeWeasley), s (SumayaPotter)]

 [17:25] f: hey broski [17:25] g: hey . hey . hey .

[17:33] s: what

[17:33] g: congrats [17:33] f: also y is everyone congratulating u

[17:34] s: oh [17:34] s: luna told them to

[17:34] g: y tho

[17:34] s: i came out to my dad

[17:34] f: ?

[17:35] s: wait shit

[17:35] g: ur gay?

[17:35] s: no [17:35] s: kinda [17:35] s: its weird [17:35] s: thats not what i told him

[17:35] f: oh [17:35] g: whatd u tell him

[17:36] s: um [17:36] s: shit okay ig im doing this

[17:38] f: no pressure [17:38] g: NOSE pressure

[17:38] s: shut up [17:40] s: do u k what nonbinary means

[17:41] f: oh bet [17:41] g: yea man [17:41] f: uk charlies trans right??

[17:43] s: w h a t

[17:43] g: ya [17:43] f: well agender rly but ye [17:43] g: we all read up on a bunch of gender stuff when he came out [17:43] f: p legit [17:43] g: u got a new name or r u sticking w su

[17:43] s: god thats so wild [17:44] s: oh uh no [17:44] s: uh [17:44] s: harry i think [17:44] s: idk

[f (FredWeasley) changed s (SumayaPotter)’s name to h] [g (GeorgeWeasley) changed h (SumayaPotter)’s name to h]

[17:44] g: goddamnit fred [17:44] f: ;)

[17:46] h: welp

[g (GeorgeWeasley) changed chat name to ‘ mlk but better’]

[17:46] g: get it [17:46] g: bc our names go fgh [17:46] g: and mlk was mlk

[17:46] h: pls stop

[moved-larvaloverlord]

just answer all of them. go

long.... long

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?

im... not confused right now. maybe about this question? being confused isn’t generally a long lasting emotion, i don’t think?

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

nope. it’s fine, i wake up at 2, anyway, usually.

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

i’m not a fan of smoke in general, but there’s zero moral problem with it, as long as it’s not in my face?

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

not particularly.

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

was i drawing? i don’t know. probably talking to the salt squad.

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

probably angela.

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

be sad and upset, and talk about the circumstances and see what i think of the whole situation.

8: Are you close with your dad?

i think so. he’s the best.

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

laughs no

10: What are you listening to?

nothing, right now, but harley’s snoring.

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

skim milk.

12: Do you like hickeys?

i think they’re cute

13: What time do you go to bed?

3am or later.

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

not that i actually expect to do well to start with.

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

faster, actually.

16: Do you always answer your texts?

nnnnope.

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

nope.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

looks at clock. looks back at this question..... 0.4 minutes ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

i get happy seeing pictures of my friends all the time!

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

probably some combination of “jason’s wearing a tie” and “it’s really hot in here.”

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

no, but harley’s here!

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

in general.

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

don’t think so.

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

 i haven’t gotten in any fights with anyone that i had much of an opinion on to start with, i don’t think, so no.

25: In the past week, have you cried?

ya.

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

grey, in a tv static-like pattern.

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

never, omg.

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

don’t think so.

29: Do you have a best friend?

ya.

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

i mean the chances of me seeing it are very low, so in that case, it would be difficult. emotionally? not at all.

31: Who was your last call/text message from?

mom.

32: Are you mad at anyone?

not actively, but there’s the passive “fuck you and everything you stand for” feeling about some people.

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

yes, but not by much.

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

probably 19?

35: How many more days until your birthday?

ummmm. pulled up an auto calculator, 197.

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

yeah!

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

i don’t know what opposite is really supposed to mean to me, but either way, yes.

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

i don’t think so.

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

ya.

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

only because SOMEONE keeps making fun of me for it, lmao. but what are friends for?

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

to an extent, yes.

42: Are you available?

not conventionally, but yes?

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

um, two, i think. 

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

hips!

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

depends on the people and the relationship, but i wouldn’t give it a hard no?

46: Do you regret anything?

i mean. who doesn’t.

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

well u ask be that last question then ask what’s on my mind, what do u THINK

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

yeah, it happens.

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

not particularly? wasn’t anything notable, really. i forget about it.

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

:|

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

nope. hasn’t seen me in two years, either!

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

no.

53: What was the last thing you ate?

a Help Me Bowl Of Rice, as i call it. big bowl o microwave rice.

54: Did you get any compliments today?

not that i remember, but what do i know.

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

idk if stopping in california counts as a vacation.

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

yeah, some souvenirs from europe, and obviously imported goods.

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

most of my friends are some kind of nonbinary, actually, but mainly feminine.

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

florida, regrettably.

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

it’s been a long time. probably middle school.

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

yeah, but it was in like, fourth grade. truth or dare with elementary schoolers, hardcore.

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

no.

62: Who do you text the most?

i don’t text much, so if we aren’t counting DMs, mom.

63: What was the last movie you saw?

moana!

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

the fact she doesn’t have an ex, i don’t think?

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

uhhh. zero.

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

yeah.

67: Do you curse around your parents?

not around mom.

68: Are you happy with where you live?

not really.

69: Picture of yourself?

laptop camera photo, not amazing.

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

polyamory is good when communication is good.

71: Have you ever been dumped?

nope.

72: What do you most like about making out?

about WHAT

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

nope.

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

usually it’s me. which is kind of horrendous, considering my relationship personality, lmao.

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

i like tummies... want to poke......

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

i’d say angela but she fell asleep in the middle of some sentence i was saying, so i think i talked to someone in the sad guro groupchat lmao

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

no.

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

nop e.

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

when i get thos little petnames from people i like..... call me a cutie and im blushin

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

at my age, i’d have to really like them.

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

yeah. i’ve turned a couple people down.

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

not really. i think two or three people.

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?

my WHAT (no.)

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

four years ago?

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

ya.

86: How can I win your heart?

if you’re sweet to me initially, i’ve probably had the thought. and if u keep feeding it, im there. give me like 3 affection and im smilin at u

87: What is your astrological sign?

scorpio, libra cusp.

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

drawing, i think?

89: Do you cook?

yeah.

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

nope.

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

n/a.

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

i don’t date much.

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

i don’t look for physical traits.

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

more money, cooler clothes, maybe a nicer laptop and phone? if i had to pick.

95: Are you a player?

lmao no.

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

nope.

97: Are you a tease?

i don’t think so?

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

once, at a con. we weren’t close on tumblr, we didn’t hit it off great there. pretty sure we’re not following each other anymore.

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

ya.

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

YEAA

101: Hugs or Kisses?

hugs?

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

story of my life

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

?? idk. noses, probably.

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

it’s grown on me, actually, but no other derivatives of “baby” other than like “bbu” are okay, and bbu is purely platonic.

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

i mean, depends on their relationship, and how they’re pursuing me?? i mean, if they’re insisting, im at least going to contemplate telling their signif one way or another. anyway, uh, probably not.

106: Do you flirt a lot?

kind of? i flirt in my way that doesn’t register as flirting, just as being a nice person, so it’s kind of always a failure, so i guess not.

107: Your last kiss?

oh, it was under the moonlight, beautiful water, semi-decent looking guy.... yeah, uh, not actually memorable. it was funny, though, he hit on every other available girl in his age range after me. i was the lovely first choice, isn’t that great? guess i’m cute.

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

this ask meme is probably intented to be answered in 2012. astoundingly, the answer is still no.

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

nope.

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

ella needs a smoochie

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

probably ella.

112: Does someone like you currently?

i think a lot of people like me. probably not in the way this question means, though, cries.

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

well yes. but also ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ is a good partial answer

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

im not a fling kind of person

115: Ever made out with just a friend?

nope.

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?

i’m equally happy both ways, i think? i don’t need a relationship to be happy, but it’s nice and makes me a different kind of happy.

117: Your own question that you want me to answer. Just write it.

ok. well then. did anyone read this