#im incapable of not thinking about and looking and the real person who chose to write shitty bigoted things its wild some of yáll do

[austinsastrology8991]

> Mer{Cure}Y <

I gots some drugs for yall fiends > plug back <

1 > No one wants to talk to each other Hi how are you? good thanks :) Nice day isnt it. It for sure is! Hey wyd. not much wbu. Im chilling. Same lol. what are you doing? Im watching something on youtube. Oh nice. Wbu? im watching anime. Oh cool. No wonder we are all fiends for some entertainment, because we are incapable of entertaining each other. 2 > The insecurity of not sounding smart makes everyone conform into a retarded form of one another. We all have the same views. The same topics are constantly being brought up. And when someone speaks about something new, everyone loses interest because no one can handle the reality that maybe they don't know something. Oh and the only reason you listen to each other is to get something from that person whether that be attention, or clout or whatever the fuck you define as your ends. Since most of us, are in a state of fear, we aren't able to talk about something we don't know about. 3 > Mercury is about confidence. And most of yall bite your tongues but love to act tough. Every person who has told me they are hard, is incapable of pushing the envelope. I think you are more caught up with your own image, and are afraid of not appearing tuff. But guess what true courage is about revolting against whats normal, or the courage to be wrong. Show dont tell true?. ANd im done hearing about whoever the fuck you think you are. Show me something interesting dont tell me what you think you are. Don't tell me what you want me to hear. 4 > Conversations are being ruined by people who are constantly telling others they are wrong. Excuse me fucker. But are you capable of arguing against me? No beyond that. Can you stick to the conversation at hand, or are you going to source the same sources every SJW ever has cited. Your not even a real person, your just mimicrying beliefs you believe in. Pathetic tbh. Hey whatever more people will agree with you because we are all jsut looking for a place to belong. so good for you. You chose the easy way out bravo. I thought conversations were a place to discuss and learn. But your so focused on being correct. to me you look wrong, but you do 'sound' right because well .. to reiterate we all want to be right so we band together with whats acceptable. 5 > School fucked you. You were told to sit down and stfu. and if you were invested in to the conversation in the class room. You were memed on by all ur class mates. School breeds insecurity, and teaches people to sit down. Thats why some of yall are so forceful in standing up for yourself. Trying to break the chains of the past. And before you point the finger at me. Don't shoot the messenger. we were all brainwashed, I dont blame anyone trying to change the foundations of your past, considering how fucked it all really is 6 > "Im not that smart" This is just an excuse. Learning everyone can do. You just need to concentrate and put effort in. "oh I canT beCauSe I HaVe ADHD" well my bad just take more of that meth shit that way you can turn into mini hitler and become smart I guess. Also if your so insecure go cry to your psychologists like ffs. Eveyrone can be smart. YOu just need to develop your confidence > Rule 3 <

7 > You learn from what you see. monkey see monkey do. if your surrounded by a bunch of dumb cunts. YOur a dumb cunt now. If your being put down by people in your clique you are surrounded by negativity. If your being constantly praised for nothing you are surrounded by yes man. Find diversity. use discrepency. Its perfectly okay to judge people. stop suppressing that urge to appear 'normal' Many people are not normal but we are so caught up in trying to act normal when we are all pretty fucky 8 > The past was different and so will be the future. Would you shut the fuck up with the pessmism. Things will change. You need to be open to receiving it. You've had happy times as much as youve had bad times. ANd if your trapped in a big pit hole of death. well you better get climbing because no one can be bothered to help anyone anymore because we are probably the most selfish we've ever been ever (social mediaaaaasaa) and the adults are still trying to adjust to the internet because the world been flipped (itll flip again) 9 > No one cares about your opinion more than you Thats why your so uncomfortable speaking your truth. Because everyone is more into their own truths. So we practise the art of self affirmation by denying other peoples truths. When everything exists for a reason. WE are so caught up in making our own manifestations true by denying others 'truths.' Selfish cunts.... But hey wtf am I saying Im just an anonymous pluto I don't know shit ;')

My next post is my last post. Don't cry. I have my reasons. My next post however is going to my >master piece< ;')

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

i’ve had this problem about how people yell at talk to me about dragon age things but i honestly see it happen a lot where like,,, yáll don’t analyze a piece of media beyond what’s in it. words are hard, but like,

example using dragon age since I write about the shitty writing a lot, I have criticized certain aspects of things as racist and islamaphobic, and I have gotten people arguing that well that thing I’m criticizing makes sense in-game. But like, I’m not talking about the stuff in game, I’m talking about how someone (a team of people, sometimes) in the real world sat down and wrote something that was racist and islamaphobic. I’m analyzing and critiquing that a person chose to write those things, right? As I said in a post

I really could analyze a lot of Dragon Age: Inquisition and the choices the Inquisitor makes, but when looking at tought or dubious choices in the game, I can’t ignore the fact that the entirety of the game and it’s choices were written by (white) people who choice to make this story. They chose to have all the racism, they chose to have it be an Inquisition, they chose to have Elven gods to be revealed as just sadistic magister slavers, to have elves slaughter and holy ground desecrated. Every microaggression or macro aggression was written because someone wanted to include it, every reference and parallel to Inquisitions was because they wanted to include it. The lack of basic respect and sensitivity for the cultures and peoples that have faced atrocities as racism, colonialism, genocide, slavery, and Inquisitions and the ripples that affect people in even the smallest of ways is truly upsetting and speaks volumes.

And I mean, imo this problem isn’t just about like, dragon age, and racism, this is just an example. I see a lot of people analyze a piece of fiction only within the world of that fiction, and not everything outside of that bubble: like the biases and bigoted views of a writer.

Sometimes yáll will see criticism about author or creator and their choices in creating a piece of fiction, and deflect it by saying that whatever thing being criticized is in character for that fictional character or there’s an in-world explanation within the fiction. And it’s just. Missing the point. Not all critcisms are about characters or w/e, some criticisms are about the writing and the creators of the fiction and you need to stop trying to ignore the real world and people beyond and behind the fiction. If someone’s rightfully critiquing bigotry in a piece of media shut up about how it makes sense in the story or its in character for some character to be shitty and bigoted or a walking stereotype.

[starlightervarda]

could you explain what is ‘positive discrimination’ fetishism? i havent heard this before and im confused. thank you.

Positive discrimination is something like ‘All Black people are great athletes/tough’ or ‘All East Asians are good at math/school’ or ‘All women are good at multitasking’ which sounds like a compliment at first, but but when it becomes taken as fact and is admired (i.e. fetishised to the extent that it can dehumanize people by limiting them to just this trait) it leads to them being burdened with things like harder work or having much higher expectations of them or thrust into bad situations based on the idea that ‘this is easy for them’ and ‘they can handle it’. It can lead to them being chosen for jobs/tasks/responsibilities based just on that preconceived notion rather than any personal, individual features or achievements, which can be a blow to your self-esteem and make you question your true worth.

And if they deviate from those standards they’re mocked and made to feel like they’re lesser or failures than others who didn’t come with these expectations attached. Another part of it is that they can be favoured just for being that ethnicity/gender/religion etc. because people are overcompensating by thinking that if they hyperfixate on you and ascribe all these unfounded ‘positive’ traits and expectations then they’re not being racist/sexist etc.

Because how can I be making you feel bad if I’m complimenting you by saying all your type are better at this thing? What do you mean you’re an individual and not part of a hive mind? You can’t be bad at this/not like this you’re -insert group-! You’re not a real -insert group- then!

In respects to Joe, people do all of the above with him to the extent that he becomes more of an idealized figure who has only qualities so that way they’re Not Racist™. He becomes this rather than a three-dimensional person who can have likes, dislikes, quirks, bad sides as well as goods sides, and...you know, have a personality.

That he was from a time period known for scientific advancements and beautiful poetry plays a huge role in this idea that Joe, at the age he met Nicky, knew everything and could do everything even when it wasn’t historically possible, and had to act as the Jane Porter to Nicky’s Tarzan.

It’s that ‘he’s incredibly cultured/ mature/ has no negative human traits whatsoever and is super-tough and capable as a Strong Brown Man™ therefore depicting him being upset/angry/petty/incapable of doing something wrong or stupid/being delicate or vulnerable is racist!!11!’ so other characters in the Old Guard get to be well-rounded human beings with problems and endless meta about their complex feelings and pitfalls (Booker/Andy) while Joe doesn’t. Joe is too good for human traits.

He was alive for a millennia, you think he spent that entire time NOT learning new things, changing his mind, tweaking parts of his personality, and acquiring new skills? He is stuck at the place he died at, never evolving or breaking down or progressing or regressing, just stagnant and perfect like one of Twilight’s vampires?

That’s the bit about the ‘came out of the womb Renaissance man’ thing I was complaining about. 

On that note, it has him propped up against Nicky, who, for contrast needs to be degraded to make Joe look even better in comparison (and more masculine). Because Joe needs to be Perfect otherwise he’s not worth admiration or his portrayal is ‘problemaaaaatique’. Because they can’t be equals, can’t both be well-rounded, can’t both have things they’re good at that the other isn’t, can’t have things to offer each other, teach other, inspire in each other.

No? Nicky is just a small, dirty moron and Joe is a dating sim android and we should be grateful he chose this loser to be his lover??? Way to destroy the beauty of their relationship.

That’s what I mean by the fetish aspect of his positive discrimination.

[just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi]

You can ugnore this if your botherd by this but do you have any way / info to know if your ace i think i may be and i dont really have irl friends to ask to know and im a confused asf 23 year old

I am not bothered by it AT ALL! This is just my experience and my opinions on it, so take what you want and leave what you don’t. 

Short version: i know I’m ace because that’s the label that I chose for myself. It just describes me the best. If you feel like it describes you, then rock it! If it changes, it changes! 

LONG version under the cut.

I remember making up crushes when I was real little because that’s all the girls wanted to talk about. They wanted to gush and talk about boys and I was just like “okay but what if we were MERMAIDS in a ZOO and we were trying to get OUT??” (lol yeah I was a whumpy kid too)

Then in like, middle school/early high school, I was just like “welp, I guess I’m just.. really picky? I have high standards? Yeah that must be it. Just waiting.” 

I had a friend who wanted to find me a boyfriend, and i gave her a very long joke list with like “his last name can’t rhyme with my first name” and “he has to like the tops of muffins because I like the bottoms and we can just buy 1 muffin.” and shit like that. I wish I still had it, it was hilarious. 

There was a point where I thought that something was truly wrong with me. Culture has connected love with sex so constantly and deeply that it made me think that I was incapable of love. Yeah. I thought that because I had no interest in sex that I was not able to love anyone and should like, idk go live in a hole or something. (Still might. Sounds kinda dope ngl)

That’s bullshit, btw. 

Then junior year of high school when I was dual enrolled in college. I was chatting with a friend, and we both mentioned that we had never had crushes/a relationship. A person behind us tapped me on the shoulder and was like, “Oh, are you asexual?”

Cue the “wat” meme. 

I questioned it a lot. Constantly. For like, an entire year. I saw a post floating around about accepting ace people and I legit cried because it still doesn’t feel real sometimes. I had people tell me the like “oh the A is for ALLY” and a not-funny-at-the-time-but-now-is-funny interaction with a very.... toxic LGBTQ person who said “I have a very good gaydar.” And I just thought apparently not cause... I am sitting right next to you. 

[I’m more than happy to talk with you in dms if you’re comfortable with that. I have... a lot of unfounded insecurities about my sexuality, mostly due to that person.]

So here’s a couple things. 

- You can be ace and still have crushes! I have had 2 crushes in my life. I didn’t do anything about them (just because one was when I was in like 5th grade and the other was because I was going through a lot of shit at the time), but it was like oh wait THIS is what people see when they see an attractive person??? Ugh I don’t like. Well actually... ?????? FUCK WHY AM I BLUSHING

- You can be ace and still recognize attraction. Like, I recognize that I feel attraction to male presenting people. Everyone once and I while, I look at a person and I’m like. “yeah. I could see being a relationship with you. Oh! I need to buy milk.” Whenever I see a video of That Type of like, dorky/stupid/goofy male-presenting people I’m just like “okay I either want a boyfriend or just like more friends??”  

- You can be ace and still feel arousal. I mean like, yeah. It’s a biological thing. I mean, you’re human. You’re not a plant or something. 

- You can be ace and have had/be currently in a relationship. Again, Human! Humans make relationships! And if you try and tell me that a relationship is 100% about sex I will fight you. Humans express love! Asexuals love people!!! Again; not plants or robots. 

I feel like my sexuality is just a range of “Meh?” to “nah” 

This is next line is my personal opinion. I am not making a statement about Asexual people as a whole or anyone that I have talked to about this. 

I feel like my sexuality is the least interesting part of me. It doesn’t make up my identity, but it sure explains some behaviors/tendencies in my life. I’m proud to be Ace and I’ll tell anyone who asks, but I genuinely forget about it like 90% of the time. 

It just slips my mind because sex/attraction is just such a small part of my life. And I LOVE that! When I finally accepted it, I actually came out of my shell more and felt like I could finally interact with people more genuinely. 

In the end, it’s okay if you are and okay if you aren’t. There was a point in my life when the label gave me a lot of anxiety, but now it gives me comfort. If it makes you anxious or uncomfortable, then put it away for a while. You don’t have to identify with labels. You can just be you for a while. Or forever! 

[faketextsfromlastmight]

Best of tags #13

A compilation of my favorite reactions to this blog.

A chat about Iida wanting to move to South America (Link):

@displacerlovesmyhero said:

I mean, some people just want to hide the bodies in South America.

@frankly-ludicrous said:

Toss 'em in the fucking Grand Canyon or something! We don't need your corpses stinking up the place, we have our own corpses to take care of!

I feel like I stumbled upon two rival crime bosses arguing about territories and now I’m terrified.

@theproxy066 on Shigaraki recruiting Bakugou and Tokoyami: (Link)

I like this, but wasn't Tokoyami picked out last-minute by Mr. Compress?

You know that shitty friend who only wants to hang out with you at the beginning of the month when your credit card is full? Well that’s how I treat the canon.

@hotonten on the D.E.K.U. method: (Link)

The U should be changed to "unconditional love"

LOVE?!!! Urgh! Are we even reading the same manga? Midoriya is a creeping black widow and he’s here to get the DOUGH. Watch out, Iida, Midoriya’s looking at your inheritance!

@abraxax-heart on Aizawa playing favorites: (Link)

This is a lie because Aizawa also dearly cares for Bakugou, Mirio and Eri (though she’s not her student… Yet). AND is also incapable of restraining himself when faced with problem children. He has to adopt them.

Forget the gender spectrum! The new way to illustrate your personality is: where do you fall on a scale from “Aizawa hates kids” to “Aizawa adopts every single kid he meets”. And now the weather.

Joke aside, I do think Eraserhead likes his students, he’s just terribly demanding of them because of his... troublesome history with the superhero system. Does he train Shinsou on his work hours, though? There might be an issue with that as he’s not part of Class 1-A (yet) so spending that much time on training a kid instead of his own students might get Aizawa in trouble. My personal headcanon is that Nezu doesn’t mind because Mineta is inevitably going to get expelled and they’ll need another student to replace him.

@nemon0416 on Kaminari and the lack of a Nobel maths prize: (Link)

Denki. I hate to break it to you...

I think Kaminari’s still correct. The Nobel prize does not reward mathematicians because that field does not directly and immediately help Humanity in a practical, applicable way (this policy has been criticized over the years and does not reflect my own views on the matter).

Although the Fields medal and the Abel prize are commonly nicknamed “the Nobel prizes of mathematics” by journalists because they’re of equal prestige, these two awards are not affiliated with the Swedish Academy which chooses the Nobel laureates.

@samqui801 on the short-lived Todoroki family sitcom: (Link)

#the fuck is todavia todos todoroki#i mean the real name of the show

The backstory I imagined for this is that Endeavor wanted to build up his image as a “family values” superhero because that was the one thing he could do that All Might couldn’t. So his plan was to coerce his wife and children into playing fictionalized versions of themselves in a family sitcom he produced, wrote and directed himself. An unholy mix of “Full House” and “Keeping up with the Kardashians”. He chose to film it in Bolivia because he heard that country had a special tax loophole which allowed him not to pay child actors (in that case, his own children). However Bolivian law required Endeavor to produce the TV series under a Castillian name rather than a Japanese one. Annoyed, Endeavor simply opened a dictionary and looked for words beginning with “Tod-”. Hence “¡Todavía todos Todoroki!” was born... and cancelled after only one episode. Endeavor considers one of the most shameful failures of his career and turns red at the mere mention of it. However the pilot episode did not fall into obscurity as Endeavor as hoped. Instead it has developed a cult following similar to Tommy Wiseau’s “The Room”. Fans post memes of the ridiculous TV pilot all over the Internet and perform reenactment during live viewings. Natsuo sometimes attends them to recount his miserable experience filming the pilot and to throw some shade at his father. Shouto is however too young to remember the shoot as it was produced during his enfancy (when Enji was still trying to “make the marriage work”).

Wow, that was longer than I expected.

@cjgryffindor714 on Shotuo taking soba baths: (Link)

Don’t forget he only likes soba cold so he’s in a cold soba bath

Oh my gods, you are right. This is even less sexy than I envisioned.

@inbrightshadows on Shouto helping Inko plan her husband’s murder: (Link)

#also Inko: What kind of laser are we talking about?#have any gun recomendations?

Well Endeavor’s still alive so obviously Shouto can only recommand which guns to avoid when purchasing online.

@chr0nosaur on Iida’s birthday gift: (Link)

#imagine getting an alarm clock for ur birthday..

Well some people don’t have to imagine it. Thanks, Mom and Dad!

@theodericc on Sero being an underdog: (Link)

#sero isn't an underdog#he's amazing

I mean he’s an underdog in the sense that he’s really overlooked. Then again not being a protagonist also has its perks... I guess he doesn’t have to worry about having a tragic backstory and stuff. My fear is Horikoshi kills him off for easy drama.

@eduarddragonpaw on Todoroki playing Minecraft: (Link)

Weirdly I feel like this is what todoroki would do or call creepers :bakugoes"

I don’t know, Bakugou doesn’t seem to like giving hugs. Creepers definitely do.

@haisley on Shigaraki’s big speech: (Link)

#hes doing his best

Or his worst, depending on your point of view.

@emkamereon-kaiba on Rei also being a conspiracy theorist: (Link)

*inhales* THEORY-ROKIS

Plot twist: Dabi is not a Todoroki but started believing he was one because he read conspiracy theories on the Internet. Shouto and Rei also subscribe to the theory which involves a complex plot of Enji/Endeavor hyponitizing them to make them forget what Touya actually look like, and hiring an actor to play Touya. Heroes and villains have to make an alliance of circumstances to sit Dabi and the Todorokis down for an intervention and help the real Touya explain he’s not an actor.

@yuuri-katsuki-nikiforov on Midoriya’s step-dad: (Link)

Who is it?? The stepdad

For the sake of the joke, the stepdad is just an original character. In my mind he’s a lover Inko took while Hisashi was abroad and who started taking on a fatherly role out of convenience. He’s now more of a father to Midoriya than Hisashi, hence him refering to him as his “step-dad”.

@ghostintheshale on Toga wanting to skin Spinner for a handbag: (Link)

#if toga so much as points a knife in spinner's general direction i will personally stomp her to death with my hooves

In this house we stan A+ scalies/centaurs solidarity representation in the media, haters don’t interact!

@samqui801 on Iida’s dietary habits: (Link)

#maybe this is the reason why im not tall i didnt wash my bananas before i eat it#and i was blaming the lack of exercises when i was young

I think I remember a paper implying that eating banana skins increased the risks of cancer, so who knows?

[albapuella]

How to Lose a Lover in 10 Days or Less: A Comprehensive Guide to Becoming a Future Romantic Failure (Chapter Three)

AO3

Fandom: Homestuck

Summary: How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days AU Dave needs to win a bet; Karkat needs to write an article. Shenanigans ensue.

Tags: Humanstuck, alternate universe - no sburb session, POV switches galore, implied/referenced child abuse Author’s note: This story is the result of a jam session I did with aceAdoxography on the davekat thirst federation discord server. This one's a little out of my usual wheelhouse, but I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. New chapters every Saturday/Sunday.  Didn’t bother with the formatting this time: You want the fancy formatting, go to AO3 :D

Day 3:

Since Karkat had not managed to scare Dave off with the... outburst yesterday, he figured he’d hooked the idiot as well as he was ever going to. Which meant it was time to start fucking it up. He did his best to ignore the sense of loss already forming in his chest at the thought. Whatever frustrations he’d felt during that hang out/date thing Dave had put him through yesterday, he couldn’t deny that he’d enjoyed the experience, too.

Dave was a dork who talked too much, but he was also witty and charming in a maladroit sort of way. And it had been nice to have someone appreciate Karkat’s sense of humor in return. For once. A part of him wished he had longer to enjoy their time together, but he knew better.

Since he knew better, he also knew it wasn’t the time to mope. It was time to go on the full offensive. “Offensive” being the operative word. In this case, it meant acting like himself. Karkat had been on his best behavior up to this point, and now he’d show Dave who the “real him” really was. If he played his cards right, he probably wouldn’t even have to go on another date to seal the deal.

Karkat felt his eyes ache, and he hated himself for being such an idiot. He’d known this wasn’t going to last—even without his article, it never would have lasted. He’d already proven a countless number of times that, while a fairly good friend, he was simply terrible as a romantic partner. Dave was just one more guy he’d never really had a chance with. Just one more tally mark to add to his failures.

---

When Dave woke up the next day, he saw that he had quite a few messages waiting for him. A handful from Rose about wedding plans (with a reminder of the dress code, because of course her wedding would have a fully defined dress code). A bunch from his far-flung friend Jade (mostly telling a story which did not require more than a quick “cool” on his part). A couple from John (who was excited that he’d be seeing Dave at the wedding). There were also several from Karkat. Which was kind of a relief: Dave hadn’t liked that he’d been the first one to message him all the time: it made him feel like he was bugging the guy. Especially after waking him up yesterday.

CG: OKAY ASSHOLE, HERE’S THE DEAL:

CG: YOU WANT TO DATE THE REAL ME. FINE.

CG: I AM DONE BEING ON MY BEST BEHAVIOR.

CG: BE PREPARED FOR ME TO COMMENT ON EVERY INANITY THAT DRIBBLES FROM YOUR MOUTH LIKE THE LEAVINGS OF AN INCONTINENT PIGEON.

CG: YOU ARE NOT HALF AS FUNNY AS YOU THINK YOU ARE. ALSO YOUR “RAPS” ARE AN AFFRONT TO THE GENRE AS WELL AS TO THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE.

CG: IF YOU THINK I AM JOKING OR BEING “CUTE”, YOU ARE WRONG. A STATE YOU SHOULD BE EXTREMELY FAMILIAR WITH BECAUSE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY SUFFERING FROM AT LEAST MODERATE BRAIN DAMAGE.

CG: I AM NOT NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN “A SNACK”. I ALSO DO NOT HAVE A “SEXY PROFESSOR THING GOING”. IN THE ENTIRE SPAN OF MY MISERABLE EXISTENCE, I HAVE NEVER BEEN ANYTHING WHICH COULD BE CONSIDERED TO BE IN EVEN THE MEAGEREST OF WAYS “SEXY”.

CG: MAYBE YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO SEE THAT FOR YOURSELF IF YOU EVER TOOK OFF THOSE DOUCHE SHADES YOU ARE ALWAYS WEARING.

CG: I HOPE YOU HAVE ENJOYED THIS SMALL TASTE OF WHAT IS TO COME IN YOUR FUTURE SHOULD YOU DECIDE TO KEEP DATING ME.

Dave read the messages a few times, frowning. Mostly, he felt confused, too confused to feel either amused or insulted. Sudden. This was sudden. Also, the more he read the messages, the more he thought Karkat was being more mean to himself than to Dave. His inner Rose (the voice which sounded like Rose but was not nearly as smart as the real thing) said that Karkat was lashing out, hoping to hurt Dave before Dave could hurt him.

And wasn’t that sad?

TG: first of all

TG: you are a total snack

TG: this is not negotiable

TG: do not pass go do not collect 200 dollars

TG: not to be all objectifying or whatever

TG: but that was literally the first thing i thought when i saw you

TG: that guy is a total snack

TG: and fuck you you are sexy

TG: i bet you look even better without the sweater

TG: you are the bank and im the debtor

TG: payin compliments is my cheddar

TG: need proof read the letter

TG: dear mr vantas you are hella sexy signed me

CG: OH MY GOD.

CG: THAT WAS THE PART YOU CHOSE TO FOCUS ON. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOU AT ALL. MOST PEOPLE DON’T LIKE BEING INSULTED. IS THIS A KINK FOR YOU? IS THAT WHAT THIS IS? ARE YOU A FUCKING MASOCHIST?

Dave was grinning so much his cheeks hurt. Nailed it.

TG: im not a masochist

TG: but i think i might be getting a thing for grumpy assholes

TG: it needs more testing

TG: how about we hang out for a few hours today

TG: and see

“CG is typing” appeared and disappeared several times.

CG: REALLY. YOU REALLY WANT TO KEEP DATING ME.

TG: yea unless you dont want to keep dating me

TG: i hope you do

TG: want to keep dating me

TG: i want to know you better

TG: and kiss you sometime

This time the “CG is typing” message went on for quite a while. Dave wondered if maybe he shouldn’t have sent that last message. Then again, he’d already called the guy sexy several times; saying he wanted to kiss him wasn’t weird.

CG: IF YOU’RE SURE YOU WANT TO KEEP DOING THIS, THEN FINE. OKAY. I THINK I WANT TO GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER TOO. JUST REMEMBER I GAVE YOU AMPLE WARNING OF WHAT THE REAL ME IS LIKE. WHEN I INEVITABLY END UP HURTING YOUR FEELINGS, YOU WILL HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT YOURSELF.

TG: score

---

After, unwisely, agreeing to meet Dave at the park again before going to some secret secondary date destination he had in mind, Karkat slipped his phone into his pocket in a daze. He was still reeling. Where had he misjudged this situation? He’d been certain he’d done enough to scare Dave away, and yet, here he was with another date to prepare for. Masochism or brain damage—those were the only options. Considering how much Dave had insisted on Karkat’s attractiveness, he was leaning towards the latter.

Of course, the words alone were only half of the total package. Even Dave would find difficulty deriving whatever enjoyment he got out of Karkat’s insults when they were being delivered at an ear-ringing volume. Karkat heaved a deep sigh. All he had to do was be himself on this date. That had always been enough for every other person he’d dated to leave him. Dave would be no different: he was just dumber, so it was taking him longer to get with the program.

* Thinks I’m “sexy”. Definite brain damage. Probable masochist. Raps have not increased in quality but I’m starting to get used to them.

---

The problem was Dave knew what he liked to do, what he found fun, but he didn’t know Karkat well enough yet to have much of an idea of what Karkat liked to do. Usually, Dave would have just asked, but seeing as Karkat had just been prepared to be dumped, he didn’t think the question would go over well.

When Dave approached the YO this time, Karkat was already sitting on the bench. His head was bowed over his notepad, and he was furiously writing. Although tempted to look over his shoulder and see what he was doing, Dave decided not to. If it turned out to be something deeply personal, he’d feel like a creep.

Whatever it was held Karkat’s full attention. Dave could be very stealthy, but he wasn’t even trying to be quiet as he got closer. Finally, he was standing right beside where Karkat was sitting. Still nothing. Remembering the reaction he’d gotten the other day, he flopped down close to Karkat, making the other man jump. “Hey.”

Karkat brought his notepad up to his chest, hiding it, and glared. Despite his clear irritation and the roominess of the bench, he didn’t move away. “What the fuck, Dave? Are you incapable of conducting yourself like a normal person? Or am I just special?”

Dave grinned. Looked like Karkat had meant what he’d said about acting more like himself. “I don’t know, you are pretty special. Not in the Special Olympics way,” he hastened to add as he realized his compliment might not come across complimentary. “I mean, nothing against them, they’re great,” he continued, now realizing the actual insult he was now offering them and not wanting to be that guy, “but that’s not what I’m talking about.”

A sort of disbelieving half-smile. “Should I stop you now, or let you keep going?”

“Oh, definitely stop me,” Dave said, relieved. He gestured to the notepad Karkat was no longer holding so tightly against himself. “What are you working on?”

“Nothing important,” Karkat said brusquely, shoving the notepad into his bag as though it had personally offended him. “Something for my work.”

It occurred to Dave that he actually had no idea what Karkat did for a living. “What do you do?”

For a moment, Karkat only regarded him with deep suspicion. Then he sighed. “I write for Dubiously Cultured.” Apparently, Dave’s confusion showed on his face, for he elaborated, “It’s basically a gay Cosmo.” Then he frowned. “You know, a magazine with fashion tips? Make-up? Relationship advice?”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Dave said quickly. The last thing he wanted was for his eyes to glaze over on his date like they did when Rose started talking about her magazine (whose title he could not recall at this moment if he’d been being held at gunpoint). “Are you writing an article? Laying down the keep your man tips for the masses?”

Even Karkat seemed surprised by the laughter abruptly bursting from him. “Something like that,” he said once he’d recovered. “You work as a DJ at the Glass, right?”

Honestly, Dave was shocked. He’d been sure Karkat had been just tuning him out! Then again, he had remembered he was from Texas, too. Maybe he just always looked bored and pissed off. “Yeah. It’s not super steady, but it pays the bills.” It actually didn’t pay the bills; Rose’s mom (his mom, she was also his mom) sent him money every month to pay for the apartment and various other expenses. However, his sad family history wasn’t exactly third date material. “You ever been?”

Karkat leveled Dave with a skeptical look which seemed to indicate his estimation of Dave’s intelligence had started low and was only getting lower. “Do I look like the kind of person that would get past a bouncer? Are you actually visually impaired, or are you making fun of me?” He shook his head. “I can see myself in the mirror, jackass; I know what I look like. Stop pretending I’m,” he held up his hands to make the finger quotes, ‘hot’.”

“I’m insulted you would think I’d lie about your hotness. You’re a fucking rooftop in the middle of a Texas summer. I should know; I’ve been there.” The metaphor stirred up memories Dave didn’t want to think about, and he wrapped an arm around Karkat’s shoulder. He immediately wished he’d done it sooner. “Anyway, I’ve already told you, you are a snack. You might as well accept it. It’s obvious. Everyone with eyes can see it. Not you, for some reason, but everyone else.”

“That’s just not true, Dave.” Before he could contest this, Karkat continued, “Most blind people still have eyes, idiot, and they can’t see anything, let alone support your dubious assertion that I’m attractive.” The words practically dripped with sarcasm even as he settled into Dave’s half-embrace. “You’re being so fucking insensitive right now.”

“Oh, shit, you’re right.” The part of Dave not worrying about the words flowing out of his mouth registered how nice and warm Karkat felt under his arm and pressed against his side. “Well, if they got to feel you up, they’d agree you were a snack, too. So, checkmate, Karkat. Check fucking mate. You’re just going to have to accept it. Majority vote. You’re a snack.”

Karkat looked up. “If you tell me you want to eat me, I’m leaving now and blocking your chumhandle.” Then his gaze shifted away. “This is nice,” he said, his voice softer than Dave had thought he was capable of. Maybe it was Dave’s burgeoning hearing loss, but he sounded… sad.

While Dave wanted to ask why he sounded so sad, he figured Karkat would tell him if he wanted him to know. After all, they still hadn’t known each other for very long yet. What was needed was a distraction, and Dave had just the thing to cheer both of them up. “If you think this is nice, you should be super excited for our date.”

---

Karkat had been feeling guilty again. It really had been nice, sitting on that bench in front of that giant art installation, to pretend that there was actually some sort of future for them. For him and Dave. Together. So, he’d been feeling guilty—even if he was an idiot who talked too much, Dave wasn’t a bad guy, and he didn’t deserve what Karkat planned on putting him through.

At least, that’s what Karkat had been thinking until they’d arrived at their final destination.

“A karaoke bar?” Karkat felt a scowl furrow his brow, and he turned it onto Dave, who had the audacity to be grinning at him. “It might interest you to know that I can’t fucking sing.”

Dave shrugged. “No one can at these places, Karkat. That’s why it’s fun.” He pushed his glasses down his nose, allowing Karkat the briefest glimpse of his eyes before he pushed them up again. “You’ve had fun before right? Or do we have to go slow and ease you into it, because fun is a hotel pool with a broken heater, and you haven’t raided the mini-bar yet.”

“Of course I know what fun is, you festering anal wart.” He saw himself ranting reflected in the lenses of Dave’s stupid glasses and looked away. “Fun is a walk in the park, or watching a movie, or going on a picnic, or playing a game. Fun is not embarrassing yourself in front of dozens of strangers by subjecting them to what can only laughingly be called your singing voice!” He started at the unexpected hand on his shoulder but made no move to shrug it off.

“Hey,” Dave said quietly, “if you really don’t want to be here, we can do something else. I don’t really know what you like yet outside of chick flicks. And writing for a magazine. And coming up with creative insults for me.” His grip on Karkat’s shoulder tightened slightly. “Help me out here, Karkat; I’m drowning with only seconds left to live. You’re the hot lifeguard, and I’m gonna need your sweet lips on mine fairly soon, or else I’m leaving the beach in a body bag. And no one wants that.”

Karkat turned back to face Dave. There were so many things to unpack in this latest offering of word vomit that he wasn’t even going to make the attempt. “Do you ever actually listen to the things you say?”

“I try not to,” Dave said blithely. “Messes with my flow.” Then the smile faded. “I mean it, though. If you want to go somewhere else, we totally can. I don’t have my heart set on this place; I just thought it’d be fun. Maybe you’d loosen up a little.”

“I am exactly as loose as I want to be,” Karkat sniped back, tacitly admitting that now he was the one saying stupid things. As much as he wanted to make things difficult for Dave for the sake of his article, he really couldn’t deny being touched that Dave was willing to change his plans because Karkat had complained about them.

Besides, while Karkat could be (and often was) loudly unpleasant and vulgar, it wasn’t the kind of thing he could force. He had to feel it. And he wasn’t feeling it. “No, we can stay. Just are there private rooms?”

Dave was frowning, perhaps in displeasure, perhaps in thought. “We can check.”

---

It turned out that there were private rooms, but they were prohibitively expensive. If this had been something Karkat had really wanted to do, Dave would have shelled out the cash, but he’d known he’d made the right call to spend the date elsewhere when he’d given Karkat the verdict and his shoulders had immediately relaxed.

Although Karkat had also protested that he wasn’t much better at bowling than he was at singing, he’d seemed less agitated about the prospect. He’d actually smiled a little when Dave had confided that he, too, wasn’t much of a bowler. Dave also wasn’t much of a drinker, but when Karkat offered to buy him a beer, he’d accepted it.

Dave was currently sipping his apple? flavored ale from the chair in their section of the alley and watching Karkat lob yet another ball down the gutter. This made, what? the tenth in a row? Dave had managed via blind luck to hit a strike with his first shot—a feat he had not been able to repeat—and that had pissed Karkat off like nothing else. Each additional failure to even get his ball any closer to hitting any of the pins only made Karkat’s face redder.

The only question was when he was going to pop.

“FUCK!” Karkat stomped back to the ball return. “FUCK ME, FUCK BOWLING, AND FUCK YOU, DAVE. YOU THINK YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME? NEWSFLASH, FUCK FACE, YOU ARE JUST AS OBJECTIVELY TERRIBLE AT THIS AS I AM—AT LEAST *I* HAVE THE FUCKING DECENCY TO BE ASHAMED OF MYSELF!”

Dave made absolutely no attempt to hold back his laughter.

“Hey, do you mind watching your language?” An older man in the next lane was giving Karkat quite an impressive glare. “There are kids present.”

Karkat’s face went purple.

---

“Well, Karkat,” Dave said as they walked down the street to no stated destination, his tone infuriatingly casual, “I can honestly say I’ve never been kicked out of a bowling alley before. I can scratch that off the old bucket list. It wasn’t on there because I hadn’t thought of it, but now I see I was blind to the possibilities. Thanks for opening my third eye or some shit like that.”

Karkat had let Dave put his stupid arm around his shoulders about a block back, and he hated the fact it felt so comforting. Bad enough he’d made an ass out of himself over nothing in public (again!), but it hadn’t even worked. He’d wanted to piss Dave off by showcasing his abhorrent personality, and he’d failed miserably. It wasn’t even his fault he’d failed either. For some inscrutible fucking reason, the idiot found temper tantrums hilarious to watch rather than embarrassing to be associated with. “Fuck you, Dave,” he said quietly, his energy quite spent.

Dave chuckled. Case in fucking point. “Aw come on, don’t be like that. It’s not like we’re banned from the place.” He paused. “I’m probably not going to get you to go there again anyway, am I?”

“I am never stepping foot back into that establishment, no.”

“Are you still pissed at me for that strike?” Dave’s voice sounded disbelieving. Maybe a little hurt. “I told you, man, it was a fluke. I wasn’t trying to hustle you. If I’d wanted to hustle you, there’d be money involved. That’s how that shit works. It’s like the definition of a hustle.”

Karkat sighed. “No, I’m not mad about that.” He hadn’t really been that mad about it in the bowling alley either. He’d just been frustrated. Loudly. Which was how he usually expressed his frustration. In the moment, it made him feel better… afterwards, he just felt tired. “I’m just really fucking embarrassed, okay? I know embarrassment is probably a foreign concept for you, but—”

Then he was being hugged. He tensed for a moment, then relaxed into it. He knew he shouldn’t be accepting Dave’s comfort, that this was only going to make things harder in the long run, but he couldn’t help himself. He really was such a selfish asshole. His head fell naturally against Dave’s shoulder, and he felt a distressingly familiar ache in his eyes. “Why are you hugging me?”

A soft guff of laughter blew past his ear. “Dude, you looked like you needed a hug. I’m not a hug expert or anything, but sometimes you look at a guy and think, that guy, he needs a hug.” The arms around him held him just a little tighter. “I hope you leave me a good review on yelp.”

Karkat choked on his unexpected laughter. “Dave. You are so fucking ridiculous.” As much as a part of him wanted to remain in his arms, he knew if he stayed any longer, he really would start crying. “Let go of me, asshole.”

Dave did so with only a moment’s hesitation. He put his hands on his hips. “So, what do you think?”

“About what?” Karkat successfully resisted the urge to wipe his eyes. With any luck, Dave wouldn’t notice how tear bright they probably were. Why was he getting so emotional anyway? None of this would matter soon enough.

“My review,” Dave said as though Karkat should have any idea what he was talking about. “Five out of five stars, right? Don’t crash my yelp score, dude—I have a reputation to maintain as hug master supreme; it’s all I have.”

And Karkat was laughing again. It really felt good.

---

* Gives nice hugs. Doesn’t respect personal space. Karaoke bar? Shitty bowler. Why isn’t this working?

---

{{ The third step is the ego. For Dr. Freud (famous psychology hack), the ego was a moderator. For our purposes, we return to the original Latin: I. Make it all about you and your comfort. If you have had enough of your short-term partner’s incessant prattle, say so. When you want to scream, do it at the top of your lungs. Use whatever language feels best to you at all times regardless of the situation. Make your short-term partner embarrassed to be associated with you. If you can get you and your short-term partner kicked out of an establishment due to your behavior, so much the better. However, if you find that such antics only serve to amuse your short-term partner, cease them immediately. The point of this exercise is to humiliate your short-term partner, not further endear you to them. Also, in the event that you are more embarrassed by your conduct than your short-term partner is, under no circumstances allow them to comfort you. It will only distract you from your objective. }}

[hobimysun-shine]

bts as billie eilish songs

I love both artist so much because they are so diverse, so driven and in love with their art, so here’s what my mind created at 2am when i actually gotta study for an exam, but anyhow, enjoy

Jeon Jungkook - Ocean eyes 

“Can't stop thinking of your diamond mind Careful creature Made friends with time”

- color scheme: Venice lavender; purple rain; valor blue 

- grey clouds, quiet ocean, salty air, cold sand, bare feet, long sweater, careful wind, watery eyes, 

- angelic, naive, trusting, incapable of stopping emotions

- a feel of uncertainty for the future, because you still have so much to experience in life, it’s hard to know who to trust, where to go and what your tears mean, who you should give them to 

- young love, pain

- it basically speaks of someone who is impressed by another human - love based on instinct and intuition, when you’re young you just feel things, even if you don’t know where these emotions come from (jungkook-namjoon relationship) ; 

- trusting someone by the feeling you get around them, without being able to trust your common sense,

- have you seen jungkook’s beautiful, ocean, doe eyes ?? (if not, then wth you doin’ with your life))

Park Jimin - idontwannabeyouanymore

“I just wish you could feel what you say Show, never tell But I know you too well Got a mood that you wish you could sell

Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before I don't wanna be you anymore”

- color scheme: pale smoke; scotch mist; apple blossom 

- cold air, morning dew, raindrops at the bottom of your window, the fabric softener your mom uses to wash your sheets, soft breathing on the side of your neck, white mirrors 

-  self-persuasion, self-critique, inner conflict, serenity, content, libra’s aesthetic approach

- if you have listened to lie and looked at the lyrics, you know why i chose this song for jimin 

- you basically get the feeling that the person is speaking to himself in this song, trying to find an answer, as to why he puts himself through all these hardships, when he could break free from this vacuum of perfectionism he created for himself

- let’s be real, we all know what jimin had to go through and maybe is still going through with being too harsh on himself, with his body image and his appearance on stage, i hope he is doing well now and is content with himself, cause he is a 100/10 and we all love him so much 

Kim Taehyung - hostage; my boy 

“I wanna be alone Alone with you - does that make sense? I wanna steal your soul”

“ My boy's an ugly crier but he's such a pretty liar”

- color scheme: concord purple; red wine; aurum gold

- big windows, night sky, city view, studio apartment, dark walls, smell of acrylic paint, ripped jeans with that paint splattered on them, acoustic guitars on the walls, quiet jazz music, film paper smoke, deep laughter, strong arms around your waist

- artistic freedom, no fear of judgement, mutual understanding, chest butterflies, assurance, hope, soulmates, in tune with your emotions, who cares if the world doesn’t get us, we get us

- hostage just reminds me of two people, who connect on a soul level so much, that what happens is their love turns into mutual engagement, similar to keeping each other as hostages in their hearts, however i wanted to turn the meaning of that song less toxic for taehyung,, 

- i believe that if there’s a member that would want to connect with people in such level as the song suggests, it would be taehyung

- as for my boy, idk it just gives me a similar base line as in singularity, and i don’t know it’s just probably my fave song of billie and i feel like it is just taehyung’s vibe when i listen to it 

Jung Hoseok - bellyache

“ Everything I do the way I wear my noose Like a necklace I wanna make 'em scared like I could be anywhere Like I'm wreck-less

I lost my mind I don't mind “

- color scheme: marigold yellow; apricot orange; candy red

- summer heat, tan skin, blushed cheeks, endless roads, loose shirts, scratched knees, rich kids away from home, one backpack and a shiny red ford convertible from your bf’s dad’s garage, loud music, lips, swollen from kissing, night fireworks

- fed up with everything, escape from reality, that one summer you will never forget, vibrant love, point of no return, rhythm, gut intuition, boldness 

- i don’t know exactly either, it’s just these are the connections i make when i hear this song, and all of that screams hobi to me (aries moon) 

- also am i the only one who imagines he would make a killer dance routine to that song (but again he could probably dance to a water drops going down a pipe, so,,)

Namjoon - bury a friend; copycat 

“What do you want from me? Why don't you run from me? What are you wondering? What do you know? Why aren't you scared of me? Why do you care for me? When we all fall asleep, where do we go? “

“ Perfect murder, take your aim I don't belong to anyone, but everybody knows my name”

- color scheme: pearl river; silver fox, steel wood

- empty stage, burning projectors slowly being turned off, microphone heavy in your hand, as the words that went though it start to make sense, sweaty hair, footsteps echoing in the vast space, feeling of falling down, unexpected, but comforting hug, security, the calming scent of someone you know in this new environment, tears of fear and excitement at the same time, new life, new beginning

-  words said out loud, revenge, mixed feeling of content and fast approaching emptiness, always racing thoughts, insomnia, trying to fill a void, searching for an overall meaning, 

- so bury a friend is just has all these questions man. they remind me of rm’s mind. i feel like all of them are things he had already asked himself, or themes he implies in his songs too 

- copycat is for namjoon swiftly leading a group that got a ton of criticism in the beginning and is still getting hate, but regardless he manages to stay on top, write what he feels, be a real artist and throw everything people said about bts failing back at their faces 

Min Yoongi - lovely ; you should see me in a crown 

“Oh, I hope some day I'll make it out of here Even if it takes all night or a hundred years Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near Wanna feel alive, outside I can't fight my fear”

“ You should see me in a crown I'm gonna run this nothing town Watch me make 'em bow One by one by, one”

- color scheme: marble white; smoke ember; royal silver;  

- dark room, cold hands, shaky breath, unable to look at each other’s eyes, fear of the outside and the inside, pocket money, long fingers pressing the out-of-tune piano keys, weary smiles, small steps

                                          (....)

 steady hands, marble walls, scent of freshly printed documents, looking through a box of old photo albums your mom sent, turning the pages a larger hand stops you from flipping the next page, two teenagers than look awfully like you two are staring back fearfully, low chuckles, eyes full of love  

- strong minds, growth, stability, strength, control, prosperity, hard work, passion, ambition

- lovely is in here because i feel like it portrays struggles with mental health and depression very well. you feel trapped and you feel like there is no one else who understands your personal hell and you are the only one who has to find a way for yourself to get out of that place. yoongi has been in such places before as we’ve heard from him and his lyrics, so i though lovely represents his struggles when he was younger

- you should see me in a crown. literally that’s all i can say, he worked for his success and he got it and he deserves it and he is killing it right now

- yall don’t know the amount of respect i got for this man and everything he has been through and i feel like these two songs portray his lowest and his highest in life and take account every struggle along the way and how he truly deserves everything he has right now 

Kim Seokjin - when the party’s over

“ Don't you know I'm no good for you I've learned to lose you, can't afford to

Don't you know too much already I'll only hurt you if you let me

Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that”

- color scheme: night snow, onyx black, muddy grey

- smell of liquor, messy steps, blurred vision, flood of thoughts, the darkest time of the night, dried streams of tears on your cheeks, your boyfriend’s hand quietly holding yours, but them you have to split ways, walking alone on the dead street, cold wind air hitting your face, but you find comfort in it, you reach home, but you can’t seem to go in; so you sit on the sidewalk, looking down; you hear distant steps; he sits down in the snow next to you; the sky slowly, but surely becomes lighter 

- quiet sadness, deeper understanding of the world, human relationships seem harder, yet simpler, timeless feeling, a sense of maturity

- this song is just a masterpiece. hear me out, i don’t think i would understand this song as well as i do now, if i have listened to it a few years back. I would have been like “oh yeah it’s sad”

-But like. no. It’s not just sad. It’s a song that shows so much maturity and experience with life that first of all, idk how billie is so young and is able to create music like that. Second of all i don’t think anyone else of bts would fit better to it, than jin 

- people tend to overlook his deeper emotions because he tends to distract from them, he always acts “silly” and tells jokes, but i feel like in songs like epiphany and awake we can see that jin really sees the world and his abilities from a much more mature point of view than other members. And i get the same vibe from billie’s song, so i feel like it would fit best for jin. 

So actually this was way longer than i planned, but yeah, this is just strictly my opinion and it was just an idea i had at 3am now, as i said, hope it’s fun to read :))

im off to bed, because i’m so sleep deprived i will start hearing colors soon 

[kippentrash]

(1/?)The fact that I thought them saying long distance was a metaphor for how the relationship is slowburn is probably far fetched right? I think Rachel will show up in 3x14, that would be some conflict possibly because Marty is shown running with Buffy :o If I'm gonna be honest I think Muffy will get together romantically but once I meet Rachel I'll either be like "love this new character!" or "i want to cry why are you this way" JUST LET THEM BE HAPPY DISNEY I BEG YOU

(2/?) Tyrus tangents always welcome! My heart broke for both of them. Cyrus is already insecure as we’ve seen and this can’t be good for his self esteem :( TJ is obviously going through something and I’m worried for what it is. Did Kira make him insecure? Or was it something different? Either way this emotional conflict (as you pointed out) feels almost bigger than the gun. Because Cyrus trusts Tj at this point, the gun situation was the thing to cement that

(3/3) Totally agree with being outsold like this episode, while hurtful in aspects was so GOOD. We’re seeing Jonah growth, Muffy and Tyrus growth and I am here for it!! Bexie not having a wedding I was actually okay with? Hopefully Andi’ll be okay too. My cats a Burmese! He just reached his 1st year yesterday :) you have a dog??? What breed? How old? Sorry I love dogs they are great animals -ghostie anon

So like this turned out pretty long bc I addressed pretty much everything you mentioned (most elaborately the buildup and teardown of Cyrus) plus more here and there. Like, I’ve typed a lot before, and I’ve put things under a cut before, but this is LONG. Like when I first got into the fandom and typed a weeks worth of responsed for the Andi Mack Month prompts long. SO UNDER A CUT IT GOES LOL (I’m sorry again for it being practically a 5 page essay ;w;)

To summarize: Rachel will definitely be an interesting aspect of the ep, the things showed of Cyrus’s insecurities plus the fact that somersaults are ‘their thing’ makes it all the more painful, I’m really excited to see what specifically they chose to do with TJ and his insecurities, Jonah’s doing better and I don’t want Jandi to ruin that, this episode has some cool parallels to 1x11, and this episode set up so much with each of the relationships I’m ready to see unfurl. Oh and rip Andi bigtime this episode.

Oh and so you don’t need to scroll all the way down, THAT’S SO CUTE MY FRIEND HAS A BURMESE TOO!!! He always looks like he’s constantly terrified lol I don’t think he likes me. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HIM!!! Doggos are amazing I have a yellow lab and I wub her sm

OKAY ONTO MY HELLA LONG RESPONSE TO YOUR ASKS I LOVE YOU AND IM REALLY SORRY IN ADVANCED 

Ooo that’s a cool thought! Maybe maybe! All I thought about the long distance thing is it was to show that Marty has changed a little during their time apart and that it was a plot device to show that Buffy’s competitiveness can cause her to get in over her head still, as well as you know the Marty worrying stuff. But that’s actually really interesting I hadn’t thought of it that way! I wonder how slow burn they can make it though considering how little is left for them to work with.

Pretty much anything Muffy related will cause conflict when it comes to Rachel tbh. Like just them standing next to one another with her knowledge will be something because of the sheer amount of sparks flying between them when they so much as look at each other LOL (You can see my Muffy stan jumping out). And I’m all for it! No offense Rachel, I know you probably make Marty happy and stuff but like… Muffy. I’m honestly kind of curious how Marty and Rachel’s relationship is going to be portrayed considering it’s going to be sunk FAST and I’m pretty sure Muffy will happen extremely soon after so. We’ll see how that goes. Because Muffy is definitely endgame at this point in my opinion, whether it be ambiguous because Rachel and Marty just broke up and they want to find security in the newly rebuilt relationship they have before starting anything or something they show with full confirmation and commitment on screen.

I’m trying my best to have NO expectations of Rachel so we’ll see what happens when I meet her lol. There’s no character in this show at this point I have ZERO opinion on I think (watch me remember some as soon as I finish posting this lol), so I’m pretty sure that I’ll definitely form some feeling about her in the single episode she’s in. But I’m kind of hoping they’re not that strong of feelings. So we’ll see how that goes I don’t want to feel bad for her but I also don’t want to just despise her for being a buffer between Muffy so. WE SHALL SEE WE SHALL SEE.

As for Tyrus, oh my GODS right? Looking at it from Cyrus’s perspective might pain me even more than looking at it in TJ’s. 

TJ’s the one person who’s constantly believed in him and never seems to be ashamed of Cyrus, and then this happens. He was the first one to tell Cyrus not to let anyone, even himself, tell him what he can’t do. Then take into account that somersault is one of those big moments in Cyrus’s life where TJ was there and believed in him and didn’t seem to be ashamed or put off by it, even though Cyrus and Andi had insisted it was something Cyrus was incapable of. Both him and his best friend tried to warn TJ against it, yet TJ didn’t give up on Cyrus and was so proud when he was able to do it. But now that same thing that TJ had once been proud of and shown no judgment towards and is something Cyrus considered to be their thing is what TJ winds up opting out of. 

It brings me back to s2 when Cyrus said “He wants to be friends with me. Who knows why.” And it makes me really want to cri everytiem. Like you said, the gun situation built up their friendship even more and established its solidarity, and you can tell they got even closer after it. He thought they were comfortable and that he was as important to TJ as TJ was to him (which he IS), especially after the whole “only person I can talk to like this” thing. So TJ not telling Cyrus something, along with that ‘something’ negatively having to do with something he thought was special to both of them, must be a real punch in the gut.  Maybe Cyrus is more secure in himself than I’m giving him credit for and is just feeling betrayed, but I think it’s more of both betrayal, humiliation, and questioning of their whole relationship (which I think I’ve posted about already lol). 

AND THEN if you take when he and Jonah were supposed to wear matching jackets together and compare that to him and TJ in this scenario, I’d think that this feels even worse. TJ was the one brought up doing a matching costume in comparison to him bringing up the jackets with Jonah, and instead of just being a jacket from a random sports game he didn’t care for, this was an inside joke that he emphasized was their thing. So it was bigger and more important. This may be me reading into it too much, but considering being ditched in a situation like this is now something that has happened to him before due to the Jonah thing, he might feel even worse about himself for letting it happen to him twice.

I’m putting a lot of emphasis on the fact that it’s their thing, because even though Cyrus and TJ both saying that in the episode was cute for the simple fact that they say they have a ‘thing’, I feel like by saying that it also draws attention to the importance of what the costume was in their relationship. It was them both being proud of having a ‘thing’ and ‘inside joke’ together. And I kinda keep in mind that Cyrus and TJ had been talking about the costume and its importance to two different people trying to stand their ground against two different costumes. They know both of them found the costume funny and was a cool joke between the two of them, but they didn’t necessarily know how much importance it held for the other. But one party backed out of something that actually holds importance and emotional value for someone they claimed they didn’t really hang out with much and with no warning at all. If it were me my anxiety would make me wonder whether it had actually been important to them at all or if it were all in my own head. ;=;

This scene just feels so built up from so many different times we’ve seen Cyrus feel insecure, and now that TJ’s become someone he doesn’t find himself feeling insecure around and someone he instead finds comfort in, having it all compound into TJ no longer being someone who he can feel he trusts makes it so much worse. Especially since it related to something he felt was important enough to them that he’d opted out of the GHC+Jonah costume.

And on TJ’s side I feel so bad that he feels like turning down Kira for Cyrus is something that wouldn’t normally be accepted, and I’m really curious what route they’re going to go in terms of which aspect of what she said had caused him to change his mind, because really there are a few different things they can go about using. They can draw it on the lines of peer pressure and social hierarchy, fear of being too obvious with how he treats Cyrus, make him question himself/his sexuality, etc. and whatever route they do take will essentially come back to TJ’s insecurity. 

But like I said, TJ’s never seemed to be ashamed of being close to Cyrus before and has never seemed to care about how being friends with Cyrus (or ‘a person like Cyrus’) might affect his image before, so I’m really interested to see what part of his insecurities caused him to ditch Cyrus. He’s in so much pain when he sees Cyrus (Luke OUTSOLD) that it makes me wonder what pushed him to even consider hurting both himself and Cyrus in the process. Especially when you consider the line from 3x7 where he talks about how if he knew Reed had a gun, he definitely wouldn’t have brought Cyrus. So yeah, I’m really curious and hope to see them actually specify what part of her threat caused him to decide to change his mind. They pretty much need to have him give some explanation to Cyrus in order for things to mend themselves.

I also wonder if TJ will feel bad enough about this to avoid Cyrus himself or if TJ’s insecurities will cause him to feel like he doesn’t have the right or can’t talk to Cyrus without it being risky, or if Cyrus will be avoiding him after this or anything. This seems like a big argument type of thing. No TJ next episode means no confrontation for at least a period of time in-universe, and I don’t think it’ll be Buffy and Andi policing Cyrus again this time. Cyrus is his own person, they know that and acknowledge that more than ever after the gun incident, and I think they know whatever he does in regards to TJ will be his own decision and will support his decision like the good friends they are. People are upset at them for jumping to conclusions about TJ ditching Cyrus but fact of the matter is their friend is extremely upset over something TJ caused, and they’re being protective. Sort of like when Amber had done some bad things to Andi, it took Cyrus and Buffy some time on their own to lower their defenses. Plus, looking at Cyrus’s face when he was about to cry after TJ leaves with Kira tells me that while the gun thing wasn’t that personal, this definitely was.

Please say that it’s not a plotline they shove offscreen for an episode like they did with Jonah and Libby before coming back to it. At least show Cyrus having some distress about it and talking about it with maybe Buffy or something. And please please please Andi Mack I beg of you stop hurting TJ like this he’s already gone through so much and he’s NOT EVEN A MAIN CHARACTER SALKDJASKLDJ Anytime he does something like this it will give me flashbacks to “classic TJ” and I DON’T WANT IT TO (okay yes I do because it shows it’s a powerful line and they’re using it to provoke me properly but you know what I mean)

Jonah, Jonah, Jonah. This poor boy. He’s growing into his own person and becoming more understanding that while he should take others feelings into account he also needs to pay attention to himself instead of just always putting on a brave face which I love. But jfc he has the worst timing to make these decisions. Andi already had so many other things just crashing down around her, adding his anvil to the pile was definitely an oof.

I really hope that now that they’re emphasizing both how Andi does not want to be the next ex in the lineup as well as how Jonah finds being in a relationship too demanding that it’s actually building up to a single Jonah endgame, or at the very least an ambiguous endgame. They have it pretty set in stone at this point that Andi and Jonah are fine with their friendship and that Jonah’s been getting himself into relationships he is most definitely not ready for, so with so few episodes left I can’t see how they can turn that on its heel and result in Jandi endgame without some major logic gaps. 

For the love of EVERYTHING Jonah take some time to be single. Amber always needing a boyfriend pales in comparison to you always getting a girlfriend even though you don’t even seem to want one???

Also random but I really like how his decision to not partake in the group costume paralleled 1x11 where Andi decided to not just make decisions to make Jonah happy. I feel like this episode in general paralleled bits of 1x11 here and there tbh. Maybe I’m just reading into it too much but not just Jonah and Andi making their own decisions instead of making everyone happy, but the whole costume aspect vs the prison uniforms, Cyrus wanting to back out of Mt Rushmore vs wanting to change into his own outfit for picture day, Buffy helping Cyrus find an replacement vs Buffy helping Cyrus find a way to use the prison uniform well for his picture, and Jonah not participating in Mt Rushmore just for Andi vs Andi not giving up on her movement and taking off the uniform just for Jonah are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head! I haven’t seen anyone mention it and it’s not like its a big obvious parallel, but it’s just some things I started thinking about after comparing Jonah and Andi’s ‘were we ever’-esque speeches.

AND FINALLY MUFFY, TYRUS, AND BEXIE PLOTS OPENING. 

Like you said, I love the develpoment they’re giving Muffy and Tyrus! Muffy’s being given time to show that they fit like puzzle pieces even after not talking for awhile and that even after they haven’t talked for awhile and left on not the best of terms, they still clearly care for eachother whatever way that is at the moment, and I can’t wait to see how they add to that care and their dynamic as we get to see the rest of Marty’s episodes in the season. Tyrus getting angst specifically related to their relationship like Muffy’s ‘I want it to be real/I don’t want it to change’, Bexie’s proposal(s) and last name decision, and Jandi’s… well Jandi’s everything since pretty much it’s always something personal blown out of proportion for Jandi is something I didn’t expect and am actually excited for the more I think about it! Like yes it’s going to pain me until the show is back, but I’m not opposed to the angst itself lol. So I’m ready to see how they grow and to what extent they grow by the finale!

Bexie not having a wedding I’m actually okay with too. Like there’s really no rush to get married, if they decide later down the line they do want to have a wedding or just want to officiate it that’s fine. They’re engaged, and they’re committed to eachother, and that’s enough for them if they can be a family. Of course, eventually they’ll probably want to go through with at least something small in the future (if you think hypothetically not with the confirmation they’re gonna have a wedding in show) that’s fine too. Honestly, considering they didn’t even go through the process of beginning to date again before proposing, I sort of think it’d be good for them if they prolong the wedding. There’s no time frame a wedding needs to occur post engagement, right?

I do feel bad for Andi though, since she was so excited and working so hard with Cece to plan for the wedding, only for it to not happen since of course it’s not her wedding and she can’t make them get married if they don’t want to. This episode was just so mean to her oh my gosh, from her parents’ marriage to her group costume, they were things she was so excited for but had to rely on others which ultimately fell through and she just can’t do anything about it really. PLUS trying to work out a friends’ relationship and make it work for them even though it’s really not something she should need to get involved with must’ve exhausted her. Trust me, I know. I know the feeling for both the being excited for something but commitments fall through and the feeling of how tiring it is trying to help friends in a relationship understand their own relationship. Lmao.

I think that was about it in response to what you said. Sorry again that it’s so frEAKING long and if you read this far (whether you’re ghostie or you’re just a random passerby on this LONG ASS POST) you a real one and I love you

I should have applied to TyrusChat with this much commentary i stg SLKAJDLKSAJ except I was too socially anxious to apply and have such disorganized thoughts to dump. Whoops.

I hope this made sense. It took me like 2-3 hrs to type this all out while discording my friends (not related to Andi Mack), so yeah. Hope this was a fun read and is somewhat coherent since it’s 2am. No proofreading we die like… dead people.

OVERALL: As you put it best...

“JUST LET THEM BE HAPPY DISNEY I BEG YOU “

[amberstorm-splash]

My Comfort Item is a Knife (A 2Dace fanfiction)

 Want to read on Archive? Sure!: https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/36898563?show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#comment_182686899

Summary: Over the years, Ace has developed a coping mechanism in flicking his knife in and out of it's holder, sort of like a pen. He doesn't stop to think how this will effect 2D, a past victim of abuse. (I am very bad at summaries, sorry.)

Trigger warnings: Mentions of past abuse

Work Text:      

   Ace never went anywhere with out his trusty blade. Sort of like how he never went anywhere without his shades, but even his shades would be removed from his person every once and a while. No matter when, no matter how inappropriate of a place to bring a blade with you, he had it on him. Swimming pools, hospitals, airports; Somehow, he was always able to hide it somewhere on his person. Hell, he would even fall asleep with it in his pocket every so often.

 If anyone asked him why he always had that blade with him, Ace would probably tell them it was either to 'keep up a character' or to 'make sure he's always safe', but the real reason was much more badass. Oh yes, the most badass reason of all. It had become like a comfort object to him.

 Yeah, sure, maybe at first he really did only have the blade to keep up a tough facade and to stay safe, but now it was much more then that. When he was scared, (which he rarely is, mind you) he'd just think of the comforting weight in his pocket, one consistency in his life, and feel braver. When he was anxious, he'd take the blade out and flick it in and out of it's holder, sort of like how some people flick a pen cap.

 That specific habit would get him in a lot of trouble quite a lot. He would often get his blade out with little thought of the people around him and the place he was in. For example, he once was at a preschool, for no reason what so ever. (Well, it was actually to pick up Snake's younger cousin, but he never tells anyone why when re-telling the story to add to the comedy. Unfortunatley, while it would probably be hillariuse if I chose not to disclose the reason while writing, I have choosen to in a desperate attempt to be taken seriously, even though I pepper jokes in everwhere else in this story.) While he was at this preschool, he became anxiouse for one reason or another and absent mindedly flicked out his blade.

 To say the least, a little girl screamed, a parent slapped him, one child tried to steal his knife, and he was told he was never allowed to go back to the preschool ever again. While that was most likely technically the worse event to happen to him because of his blade flicking habit, he definently felt much worse for what he accidently did one day;

------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Ace had been part of the Gorillaz band for only two months now, but somehow he had become fairly emotionaly attached to all 3 other members of the band already. If he had to pick a favorite band mate, it would must likely be 2D. The man was odd, to say the least, and even a bit unstable, but he was also kind hearted, talented, and hillariouse, even if sometimes Ace was unsure if he was meaning to be or not.

 Currently, Ace was watching a movie with said man; One of the horror flicks 2D seemed to greatly enjoy. Ace was usally fine during horror movies, he knew they were fake so he didn't find them that scary. No, he wasn't scared, just... Anxiouse. Extremley anxiouse.

 In this specific horror movie, their were many moments of intense, seemingly stretching forever silences. They would come right before crappy jumpscares, and happened enough in the movie for Ace to not get surprised by them. Yet, being in complete quite for such long periods of time, with nothing to look at other then a scene on a screen, which was usally of a dark corridor with nothing interesting to look at, his eyes wandered.

 As his eyes roamed around the room, he tried desperatley to focus them on to something, but everything seemed too akward to. His first thought was to look at or near 2D, but something about the man made him hard to look at without getting extremley nervouse... For some reason.

 After that incident, Ace tried more frantically to find anything else to look at. He didn't know why it was so hard to survive just one scene in a movie, but it bloody was. Without really noticing, he got his knife out by years of muscle memory and habit, and flicked it open.

 Thump! Ace looked over quickly to see 2D had fallen off the couch onto the ground, panic written all over his face. Had something jumped out in the movie while Ace wasn't watching? He looked to the scene to see it was still in the dark hallway, only for a monster to pop out a few seconds later. No, guess it must have been something else. Ace subcontiously squeezed his knife in concentration, and that's when it hit him.

 He speedily sheafed the knife into it's holder, putting it just as quickly into his pocket before kneeling on the ground next to 2D. "Sorry, 2D! I- I didn't realize that would scare you, it's just a habit of mine." Ace quickly tried to explain himself, helping the other man to his feet again as he did so.

 "S'alrigh'. I'm jus' a bit jumpy 'cause of the movie is all." Despite his words, 2D was visibly shaking and his eyes were darting around as if someone was going to attack him at any second. Besides, Ace had watched a few many horror movies with 2D, and he had learned by now that the blue haired man didn't get easily scared by them, even when Noodle would make sudden loud noises from somewhere in the house from doing... Whatever it was Noodle did in her free time.

 Ace tried his best to look sturn. "That's a lie." And just like that, as 2D gave an exasperated frown, Ace completley forgot about looking seriouse. "Are... You alright? Did something happen, with a, er... Blade, in your life? Like, a bad past experience with a blade?"

 He knew he worded it weirdly, knew it was stupid sounding, and he knew 2D would most likely laugh. Then, his cheeks would go red and he would try to hide it by turning his head away. But, he was quite suprised when 2D didn't laugh, and instead just looked mildly grieved, staring almost in a reminesent way at the wall.

 "Yeh... You could say that. Though, tha's quite a weird way of wordin' it." 2D gave a not so toothy, weak smile to the slightly shorter man before sitting back down on the couch. Ace followed suit, possibly a bit to quickly. 2D flinched again, followed by a spew of apologies from Ace. 2D simply shrugged in his general direction before continuing on with what he was saying. "Y'know who Murdoc is, righ'?"

 Ace gave a slow nod, suddenly feeling like he knew the general direction this story was heading. "Yeah, I knew him." 2D looked surprised, and Ace realized he had probably meant had he heard about him on tv or something. "Well, I used to know him. It's... Complicated," And for once, Ace told the truth about his past friendship with the other green man. Though, that was probably going to be the last thing he told 2D about that relationship. He didn't like to remineces.

 "Yeah, my relationship wif 'im was also... Complicated." 2D seemed conflicted for a second, as if in the middle of mental war between two ideas. Ace wasn't sure if one side had one or not when the other man began to speak again. "He was 'orrible to me. Always screamin' and frowin' shoes at me. I tried ta wait it out, tried ta make him a better person, and summtimes he did seem like 'e was gettin' better. But, when 'e left, I realized I shouldn' 'ave to deal wif that." He paused, looking up to the celieng with a semi-determined expression.

 "I fink I'm doin' a lot better wifout 'im. I dunno though, 'e always said I was a useless idiot. I'm not sure if I should believe that or not, now..." The courageous look melted off his face like butter on depressed mashed potatoes. Ace felt a shiver run down his spine. So, Murdoc hadn't gotten better. If anything, it seemed like he'd gotten worse. He wanted to know more of the details, to be able to see the full picture of Murdoc's abusive nature, but he didn't want to force the blue haired man to reflect any more. Some things were best left forgotten, at least until your stable enough to look back at them properly.

 Ace looked akwardly to the side of the room, then to the floor, then to the clock... Soon, his eyes were wandering again. He didn't know what to say to reasure 2D, and he was becoming rather anxiouse. His hand reached into his pocket, and... No. He snapped himself out of it. Right, 2D will get scared. If making sure not to trigger trauma filled memories from the tortured man meant getting rid of a bad habit, even if that habit calmed him down sometimes, so be it. He didn't want to see the sweet singer who had so eagerly became his friend suffer anymore for something that wasn't his fault.

 Instead, Ace decided to talk to 2D. Any words were better then this deafining silence that had seemed to trap the two men, even if Ace had no clue what to say and he seemed physically incapable of speaking. "You're not useless 2D. You're part of a hit band and you've got an amazing voice." He knew their was more to 2D then that; Their were so many great characteristic the man possesed, he didn't know where to start. But naming any other things he liked about the man other then his musical talent seemed like it would come off awkwardly.

 2D simply frowned at the remarks, heighting Ace's anxiety even more. "Tha's wot Murdoc would say, too. He batteled 'is insults of everyfing else 'bout me with compliments on my singin' to trick me inta trustin' 'im." Oh shit, Ace messed up. Guess he now had to admit all the other things he liked about 2D, even if it made him feel embarresed.

 Ace put on a determined facade, and grasped the othe man's hand. "Ah, but there's more though! You're really kind, your hair is nice, you actually care about people, and somehow you have the ability to make someone both calmed and nervouse by your presence at the same time." He realized he had probably admitted to many things, and shut himself swiftly up, and in the process let go of 2D's hand.

 The blue haired man raised an eyebrow in a mix of concern and s̶u̶g̶g̶e̶s̶t̶i̶v̶e̶n̶e̶s̶s̶ curiousity. He spoke up timidly. "Ace... Why do I make yew nervouse?" Ace paused. Shit, shit, shit, he figured me out. But what had 2D figured out about him? The more Ace thought about, the more confused and anxiouse he got. Surely 2D wanted an answer, but... When he looked into the man's eyes- Wait nevermind- When he looked into the man's heart all he saw was worry and care.

 Ace searched to see if he could find any other emotions hidden in the labirenth of the mind of 2D. Their were lots of little hints, but no conclusive answers, at least not in Ace's eyes. A slight blush painting the other man's pale cheeks slightly pink, a single bead of sweat runing down his forehead, and eyebrows tilted in a manner of self doubt all seemed to give away some lokced away emotions.Though Ace didnt understand any of these things, he still decided he needed to speak. "This band, everyone in it, and you... You're all so kind. I don't want to mess up and lose that."

 "We wouldn' kick yew out for no good reason, Ace." 2D stated suddenly. He had a determined look fixed onto his face, gaze intensly set on the carpeting near his feet. When Ace didn't reply, his gaze softened and he looked over to the shorter man. "I fink everyone 'ere cares about yew... I care about you, Ace." Again, the light pink hue appeared on his cheeks, and he quickly looked away from the green man again.

 Ace sputtered for a second, before quickly regaining his cool. "Aww, do you have a crush on me, 2D?" He made sure his tone of voice was as sarcastic and mocking as possible, to make sure 2D defienentley knew he was joking. There was completley no other intent behind his words other then to make 2D laugh. Totally.

 Unfortunately, Ace had caught 2D at a point where he was just zoned out enough to tell the truth. "Yeah..." Ace paused. There was no humor in 2D's voice, only warmth and honesty. After a few seconds of silence, 2D seemed to slowly realize what he said, and did a quick backtrack. "I mean- Yeah, ha ha, tha's a funny joke, Ace." Ace stared at the man. If he was lying, he was really bad at it. It was sort of cute, he had to admit. Now he was almost certain of how 2D felt for him, but, he still wasn't sure about how he felt for the other man.

 Yeah, Ace definentley cared about 2D deeply, but he was yet to be able to pinpoint if those feelings were romantic or platonic. But, as 2D said those words, his cheeks went bright red in a way he knew could only mean one thing. He made up his mind and scooted a little closer to 2D, and reached for the other man's hand. He smiled slightly as he felt the man's long fingers curl around his own mishapen ones. "Can I kiss you?" Ace didn't even think to stop the words coming out of his mouth. It felt natural.

 2D hesitated, a look of anxiety sweeping over his face. He attempted to hide it, but Ace was able to catch it before he could. "We don't have to kiss, obviously. It's up to you if we do or don't. Im fine with either." He flashed a fanged grin for good measure. 2D seemed a bit scared of the thought of kissing him, and from what he had gathered from what the bluenette had told him about what Murdoc had done to him, it was a miracle 2D trusted anyone, so Ace wasn't upset 2D probably wouldn't want to kiss him right away. Hell, even if there was no Murdoc, Ace still wouldn't want to pressure someone to kiss him, espically not someone as wonderful as 2D.

 The weary expression on 2D's face lasted for only a second more or two before a small smile erased it, and hot damn. (Let me cut in here for a second, as the author and a fellow lover of 2D's smile. I'm not going to even narrate to you what Ace thinks of 2D's smile, because if you have seen this man smile, you will already understand perfectly clear how it can bring world peace. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.) "Will a hug do, instead?" 2D streched out his arms in a shy inventation, and no way was Ace missing this oppurtuntiy.

 Ace carefully wrapped his arms around the other man's waist, placing his head in the crook of his skinny neck. An even cuter smile melted on to 2D's face as he wrapped his arms around Ace's upper back, as if trying to protect him and this moment. They stayed like this for a while, with 2D smiling down with melancholy at Ace, and Ace listening closely to the soft heartbeat of the taller man.

 Ace felt the world drift away. All that mattered right then was 2D's heartbeat and warm embrace. He was so enraptured by 2D's heartbeat, he barely was able to hear the man when he started talking. "I've never 'ad summfink like this before, y'know." Ace pulled away a bit from 2D to be able to see his face while he talked, making sure to keep his hands on the man's hips so he knew Ace wasn't trying to stop the hugging.

 2D coughed weakly before continuing. "I've 'ad relationships before where the other person claimed to love me, bu' never like this. Any hugs were only a means to an ends. Usally, the people would jus' kiss me an' try ta get in my pants, or in a specific situation, jus' abuse me..." 2D gulped, fighting back tears as he bit his lower lip. Was he talking about... No, it didn't matter right now to Ace. All that mattered to him right now was reasuring 2D.

 Ace reached a hand up to cup 2D's cheek, fingers tentatively gliding near the other man's face, wanting permission before touching him. When the man nooded his head, Ace held his face as lightly as possible, as to not upset the man. "You deserve to be hugged, 2D. To be hugged for an hour with no ill or sexual intent in mind, but instead only because that person cares and loves you and feels for you. I feel for you, Staurt."

 Those words were it. Big fat tears escaped 2D's now white eyes and fell down his face. This time, it was Ace who uponed his arms for 2D, and the sobbing man was more then happy to dive into them. Almost desperately, he clinged to the other man, all while Ace hugged back, glad he could help comfort the upset man. They stayed like this for a while, even after 2D calmed his breathing and his tears dried.

 Eventually though, 2D pulled back, much more calm then he was before. Still, despite being mostly calm, he seemed to still be a little worried and his hands were shaking, so Ace held his hands,and almoat immediately 2D brightened. "Fank you," He said, before placing a soft kiss to Ace's cheek.

 Ace was stunned silent for quite a while, face going red despite himself. 2D frowned. "Sorry. I didn' mean ta upset yew"

 The once green, but now red faced man simply shook his head, a wild grin plastered seemingly permenantley onto his face. "Nah, you're fine. It was preety sweet, actually." Ace stood up before giving an akward wink to 2D, but since 2D was also the most akward man alive, he found it actually quite charming.

 2D stood up too, not wanting to be left alone on the couch to just sit there. "Well, I guess I should 'ead to bed. Goodnigh', Ace," His words were filled with warmth and sincerity. Ace chuckled.

 "See you tomorrow, Staurt." Ace gave a small wave, before turning to walk away to his room. He couldn't wait to see 2D again, yet he was nervouse, too. 2D was in a bad mindspace right now, but he wanted to help him through it. And whatever happened, Ace wanted to show 2D he deserved someone better then Murdoc Niccals.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

i was just going to quickly mention hating ads for the good doctor series but then i went off about things for a ways

i hate seeing ads on youtube for a lot of things but im especially sick of the previews for the god damn series from The Creator Of House about the guy who's good at being a doctor but he's an immature self-centered jackass incapable of any emotional regulation he's autistic!!!

like look i never really was Into house but i mean i get that it was there to be reliably dramatic like, here's some possibly shock-factor weird medical scenario, rule out boring stuff, have a fancy idea, find out some new twist info abt the patient, condition worsens, have a few twists to discover the real thing, then end with teaching the patient to value themself or else to feel terrible b/c they deserved it or some third thing. like, sure. but its definitely extremely annoying that it sort of kicked off a trend of gloomy white guy protagonists who meet that "He's Good At His Job.............But He's An Asshole" role. as though being needlessly rude to everyone around you doesnt make you bad at what you do and is also justified in this concept of "Smart(tm) people are allowed to be mean to the point that their being mean is proof that they are smart, because they are constantly irritated and hampered by the clueless shitheadedness of those around them"

oh god this made me go off on a mental tangent about shemlork. god nobody wants that. it makes me forget i'd like read thru all the sh stories before the guy ritchie movies came out, which are a much truer adaptation anyhow and look at the completely different way in which they chose to exaggerate how the Genius protagonist relates to other ppl. god

anyhow i respect that house is entertaining and stuff but i dont think i can ever watch it coz i hate that trope. the idea that some guy can demonstrate his superiority by being petulant and snarky w/o consequence coz since he's a dude that doesnt make him a Total Bitch it makes him cool. and completely insulated self-assured impulsivity based on the first emotional response that enters your head = also uhhh, being driven, and knowing your brain is always the right one to the point that anyone else is superfluous, because you're a genius and a man and not Bitches Be Shopping. and that one dude is Wise enough to tolerate him b/c he knows that he gets results dammit! and everything else he does thats blatantly out of line for any human towards another human, much less a doctor towards colleagues or patients, is just the price you have to pay for him to figure out its the bubonic plague mixed with an allergic reaction to scrubbing bubbles

Anyways Besides Being Annoyed With The Trend Established By That Show...

so now we get "what if this guy is good at his job but he has autism", and of course everyone with an ounce of sense and decency should know that's not a "but", except that we get a lovely reminder that in this year of 2017 a general tv audience (and tv producers/executives) think it needs a But. and since its autism, it's gonna be a feel-good show. look how well he does wow!! and in this show its not just him being a Good Doctor(c) because he chooses not to let his autism affect him just as all people should do when they arent nt or are disabled, this is being taken a step further and he's a good doctor Because he's autistic. coz thats what autism should be ideally, either Suppressed or hidden away or else the idea of it being a magical superhero that lets its bearer be acceptable into regular society for normal good people but, more importantly, lets the person use their Power to aid allistic people!! a happy ending all around

like in the horror genre where anyone implied to have any kind of generic mashup of a mental disorder or something is either A Monster or a burden to the team until the team discovers that this person who was previously regarded as "useless and we should just leave them behind to die so they dont hurt our own chances of survival" actually has a flawless superhuman ability that is directly related to helping them escape whatever situation theyre trapped in!! point them at the problem and we'll get to live!!!!! maybe they'll live til the end too, or maybe they'll have to be left behind or prove they have feelings too by nobly sacrificing themself for the rest of the group, who are now sad because they just learned that person's life has value too after all!!! :'(

anyways, tldr, ugh. this is a shitty foundation for anything and a shitty reminder how ppl see autism. ppl with autism having different strengths and talents than any particular allistic person isn't some kind of "novelty" and god knows ppl only like that idea if its one that happens to seem "useful" to them. the idea that its secretly a superpower and autistic people see the world in some mystically different way b/c thats how autism works is shit. i am just so annoyed. fuck off

P.S. again it is funny that people love to describe someone w autism as like "having the _______ of a __ yr old", despite that being meaningless and inaccurate, because they think that being autistic = just being an allistic person but lagging behind, becoz you know who Actually fits the description of "an allistic person who apparently has never spent a moment developing certain social skills?" The Man Who Demonstrates His Superiority By Freely Insulting Those Around Him And Acting On Emotional Whims Without Real Consequence". i mean the "house" figure

pps remember how shitass benedict cumberbatch rejected the idea that his dumpass character could be autistic b/c he didnt think one should give real life autistic ppl "false hope"? lolololololol punch him full force in the nads ten times. is he just portraying himself. i hate his crap character and his stupid lemon face. is that damn series over yet. make a third one of the movies and why is martin freeman in everything, dont put him in. jfc.

and what does he even mean lol they already put in that stupidass line about "high functioning sociopath" or whatever like no!!! youre really not!!! just tossing in some mangled up nt idea of Jargon like clearly nobody gives a shit abt being accurate or not and youre just picking out some random "this means their brain is weird and bad right" concept and tossing it out there to be brilliant and justify any "magical ability" you want to use as a visual device so that you dont just have to show the character staring at the wall for a while. fuck off

they also shouldntve thrown in any mention of will graham in hannibal being autistic or whatever. seeing as he has a Magic Ability. like actually magic. there doesnt need to be any mention of autism especially as its never given any actual relevance to anything in the series. if its just being Representation is that truly the best? i wouldn't say that character or any other couldn't be autistic. but the fact that its a character with a Magic Ability / social isolation and virtually no characters on tv are mentioned in the show to be autistic unless to explain their magicalness / social weirdness!! means its not a great movie & even if it was just meant to be "progressive" or whatever independent of those factors( it wasnt) they shouldntve done it. the optics, man

final note: you know who's a good example of the sherlock holmes type observational genius / guy who doesnt fit in with his associates in his line of work coz he operates outside their rules, man? shawn spencer from psych. he doesnt treat his partner gus as beneath him or a hindrance ever coz he's not? he's essential to their success and shawn never even implies to have Superior Faculties than him. he just notices things. that one classic line of "i can notice things too, shawn. and i dont have to make this face *narrows eyes, furrows brow for several seconds* when i do it." and shawn kind of annoys the cops and everyone else and they have to Tolerate Him coz he gets results and he's allowed to be immature and also impulsive but thats not at all related to His Genius being a god given excuse to do whatever he wants at the expense of any others who happen to be in his path. he's just being zany

at least theyre doing that psych movie?? we need you!!!!!!

[sbnkalny]

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