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noxexistant · 1 year

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Jack muttering" take me instead your not touching him."

Specs pulling splasher away to gently soothe him. And jack desperately yelling no scrambling in their direction.

Blink and skittery holding him. "Shhh Jackie we gotcha. Yer allright now. We aint gonna letcha go there again."

Jack not recognizing them crying silentky thinking he failed and his friends hearts breaking just holding him till he falls into a fitful sleep and eventually they do too though not before looking at each other desperately for way too long wondering what they can do

(based on this)

Jack’s pulled from sleep by a little hand shaking his shoulder. It’s gentle and tentative, accompanied by the sniffling of a kid about to burst into tears - and suddenly Jack is wide awake.

“Shh,” he hisses immediately, a knee-jerk reaction, as he hauls himself upright in his bunk and then over the side, bare feet hitting the floor silently but hard enough to make his shins sing. He always sleeps in a top bunk if there’s one going, there ain’t as many rats that can get up there, but that means if there’s a kid shaking him they must be stood on the lower bunk, which means they might wake those kids up, which means more noise and more trouble.

Sure enough, the kid - Splasher, Splasher - has his bare feet planted on the bunk below Jack, a mattress occupied by a sleeping body. He’s got one hand gripping Jack’s bunk to keep balance while the other - the one he’d used to wake Jack up - is wiping clumsily at the tears streaming down his face.

“Jack,” he whines.

“S’okay,” Jack whispers, scooping Splasher up under the arms and lifting him down to the ground, glancing cautiously to see if the body in the bunk is stirring but panicking too hard to really look. He then crouches in front of the kid, still holding him by either side of his ribs to keep him close and still. “S’okay. Alright? Calm down. You gotta calm down. You gotta be quiet.”

Splasher hiccups. It’s deafeningly loud to Jack’s ears, and he feels himself start to panic because the kid is starting to cry. His face screws up and he huddles closer to Jack, his one hand gripping tight at Jack’s shirt.

“Jack—“ he repeats, a sob this time.

“Shh!” Jack hisses again, maybe a little sharper than he’d meant to, but he doesn’t need any listening guards to hear his name and know it’s him. There could even be listening kids, the types who’ll snitch and tell the guards Jack was up making noise hours past lights out just to get him beat or at most get themselves an extra piece of bread next week, but that’s his second priority. His first is the kid, and getting the kid to be quiet.

“You gotta stop. You gotta stop, buddy - quiet, okay? Just—just—‘s’okay, just…”

His mind is blank. Splasher is sobbing, the loud crying of a kid that don’t know what’s coming, and Jack can’t let him find out. He can’t, he can’t, the kid’s only tiny, and he’s already crying, he’s shaking like he’s scared - and suddenly his eyes, all huge and full of tears, go behind Jack like there’s someone there, and Jack immediately knows there is. His stomach drops like a stone, like his chest caved in and fell there and left the space around his pounding heart chillingly empty, and he could throw up. He’s scared. But he ain’t scared, ‘cause Splasher’s scared, and he’ll take any beating like it don’t hurt at all to make sure a kid stays safe.

He wrenches Splasher behind him rough enough to make the kid shriek, and spins with the knowledge that maybe the first hit won’t hurt so bad if he acts like he was gunning for it.

“Was me!” he says, and it’s only then that he realises he’s breathless. He forces himself to keep speaking regardless, throat feeling like it’s closing. “Was me, I woke ‘im up, ‘s’my fault, please—“

Please don’t hurt him. Please don’t hurt him. Lord, Splasher ain’t even running, he’s still stood stock still right where Jack shoved him to, even though there’s someone coming right at him now—

“No!” Jack screams, as the person reaches out for Splasher and grabs him, and Splasher goes willingly, like he trusts the monster. He don’t know what’s coming. They ain’t being rough, they’re leading him away careful but firm with hands on his shoulders, but that gentleness don’t mean much. Often enough it means it’s gonna be worse, but there’s hands grabbing Jack too when he tries to go for Splasher. Arms winding around him to hold him back, even as he kicks and wrenches and fights.

“No!” he shouts again, desperate as Splasher gets further and further away. “He didn’t do nothin’! Don’t, don’t! You ain’t touchin’ him, take me, take—‘s’my fault—You ain’t fuckin’ hurtin’ him, please!”

Jack is pulled back helplessly into the chest behind him - smaller than any guard he’s ever seen before - and suddenly he’s sinking to the floor, knees buckling, entirely unable to get air into his lungs. They’re burning, searing, as hot as the burning in his eyes, and his ears are roaring like there’s a fire too. He can’t hear nothing, can’t feel nothing, can only see Splasher being dragged away - he was trusting Jack, he woke Jack up, he wanted Jack to protect him but Jack couldn’t even do that. He failed, the kid’s never gonna trust him again, never gonna trust no one again just like Jack can’t.

“Please,” he sobs. “I gotta—he’s jus’ a kid—‘s’my fault—“

He wrenches again against the hold on him, barely a useless little jerk against those arms bound way too tender around his waist and chest, wrapped around him like a hug, and maybe he’s insane but finally he can’t help but melt. Exhaustion and failure crash over him like a wave to finally drown him, and he’s left adrift, sobbing like a kid. Sobbing like Splasher did.

Blink feels like he can’t breathe either. There’s something visceral about watching Jack writhing and wheezing like this, something that makes his brain feel like maybe there really ain’t any air in the room, even though he’s talking so there must be. He don’t think Jack is hearing a word of it, but it’s worth it just to say it. To not feel quite as helpless as they is.

“Yer alright. Yer alright, Jackie, it ain’t real. You ain’t there. Jus’ a nightmare, fella. Splash ‘s’fine, he’s wit’ Specs, he’s safe. You’re fine.”

“He ain’t fine,” Skittery scoffs, venomous, almost as breathless as Jack is.

He’s still holding him tight, even though Jack ain’t fighting anymore. It looks more like a hug now, just holding instead of restraining, and Skittery’d probably sooner die than admit it but Blink supposes that’s probably what it is. Jack is all boneless, just crying, and Skittery’s holding him like he’s trying to hold him together.

“You’re here,” Skittery tells Jack, spoken into the wild sweaty mop of Jack’s hair. “You’re at home, Jack. You’re alright now. You’re safe. Alright?”

Jack definitely ain’t listening. His eyes are still all distant and glazed over, but his eyelids are drooping like maybe he might fall asleep again, like maybe the fear’s already crashed, and on nights like this, that’s often more than they can ask for.

“Get him back in bed,” Blink murmurs softly to Skittery. “C’mon. We can get ‘im up together.”

They do. They haul him into Blink’s bunk behind them, underneath Jack’s, and crawl in with him while fiercely ignoring the eyes all watching them, startled awake by the commotion and Jack’s hollering. Crutchie’s watching from the next bunk over, but Blink can’t stomach looking at him - though not much less than he can stomach looking at Skittery where he’s on Jack’s other side, curling himself around Jack’s back. Skittery looks sick, maybe as sick as Blink feels.

Blink settles himself against Jack’s front and pulls his face to his chest, wincing at the burn of his tears and the clammy feel of his skin.

“Yer alright,” Blink tells him, quiet. “We got you, Jack. We ain’t lettin’ you go back there.”

Jack’s passed out a second later. He’s out cold, dead asleep like he got knocked on the head, and Blink don’t doubt for a second he’ll wake up in the morning still exhausted and without a damn clue what happened, like he always does when he has turns like this.

Blink and Skittery’ll remember, though. Just like they’ll remember every second they spent staring at each other over the top of Jack’s head, through sweat-damp strands of his dark hair, until they both finally manage to pass out too.

(And, true to form, Jack doesn’t remember a damn thing in the morning. He don’t even know which way’s up. He looks like shit and can hardly walk straight, stumbling with bleary, half-glazed eyes right out of Blink’s bunk a full hour before the bell’s rung. But he won’t settle - not until Blink gets up too and guides him over to where Splasher is tucked with Specs in his bunk, cosy and fast asleep and entirely unharmed.

“Think I musta had a rough dream last night,” Jack mumbles. Blink doesn’t correct him.)

#newsies #jack kelly #splasher newsies #kid blink #skittery newsies #splasher #skittery #my writing #answered #anonymous #cw abuse

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messrmoonyy · 8 months

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Messrmoonyy, I don't even know how it flew by so fast, but it's officially been a year since I started reading your fics. And throughout this year I experienced so much through your work, so i’m here to say a big Thank you!

Reading your writings is truly a magical experience. I always immerse myself completely in your words, they’re like my secret portal which takes me to another universe. I found comfort in them, i laughed, cried on a bathroom floor, was rolling around the bed while screaming and biting mi fist… I've been to Jackson, Boston, Lincoln and wherever you took me, Messr. You’ve been feeding my lust for Tess for a whole ass year now and I’ve read every single one fic from your Tess masterlist several times and absolutely loved and devoured every word of each. Pure talent and perfection. I admire you, your creativity and ability to breathe life into your writing, your kindness and helpfulness. You were actually the first person I read my first fic from and i was blown away as your writings are seriously better than many published books i have read. Since then, I can't remember a single day where I haven't checked your page. I’m thankful for all the excitement when you posted something, for counting down the days till the next week’s upload, even my destroyed sleep schedule and sobbing into the pillow uncontrollably (yes, i’m talking about 5+1 which i’ll never recover from i decided) and endless rambling to my friend about how much i loved everything about your fics. Your talent is truly remarkable and phenomenal and i’ll never shut up about it. You’ve inspired me so much, you’ve evoked strong emotions, thoughts in me, ignited my imagination through your words and kept my obsession with Tess alive. It’s been a rollercoaster of emotions thanks to you, and for all that I owe you an incredible and huge thank you. So thank you so much for everything Messrmoonyy, I hope you know that even through your writing you are so so loved and aprecciated (all over the world i belive, i’m from Slovakia so also my english might not be perfect) and I wish you a wonderful day filled with joy and happiness, i love you! 💗💗💗

Plus i’m sending you pics of Tessa, look how she’s grown!!🤗

IM GONNA CRY WTF MAN 😭😭🫶🏻

I literally don’t even know what to say to this, you are so unbelievably kind thank you so so much. Honestly I always look forward to your feedback on everything I upload you have always been so incredibly supportive of anything I put out and it doesn’t go unnoticed I assure you. You are an angel.

I honestly can’t believe today is a year since I posted my first Tess post and I’m so thankful for everyone who’s come along with the journey and watched me improve and grow and fall into my own style. My number one goal is always to try and make people feel things, to be able to even just escape for a little while. And I’m so glad it comes across.

I honestly just don’t even know what to say I’m seriously gonna cry and re read this ask a million times over. Just thank you so so so much, for your kind words always and just cheering me on with every single thing I upload🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

And give your sweet baby lots of pets and nose boops from me.

#ask #reader feedback #gonna go cry now bye

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almond-tofu-chan · 7 months

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i have never been angrier in my entire fucking life, it is taking every fiber of my being to not actually punch someone right now /srs

so this fucking show im assistant directing, WAS assistant directing, i quit because it was hell. the director is this piece if shit entitled bitch who doesnt know or care how to run a good show. i signed up to assistant direct, ended up babysitting a bunch of kids from four to six every day five days a week. while i was doing the job I DIDNT SIGN UP TO DO i was verbally berated, abused, mistreated, and taken advantage of at every possible corner. when i learned tech week would be till eight i fucking quit

heres where i get fucking pissed: the kids were amazing. theyre a bunch of talented, bright actors who are absolutely lovely, and for most of them this is their first show. i understandably feel awful for quitting, plus the bitch director hates me nowc but i show up to opening night to cheer them on

i want to kill this woman

kids are crying, shes yelling at them backstage constantly, lighting and sound cues dont work, choreo and blocking are nonexistent, so are props and costumes and set: everything needed to make a show a show is absent or so shoddily put together that it genuinely looked like it was going to fall apart

and the kids are amazing, they do so well with what theyre given and theyre so good and talented and im serious when i say theyre all gonna go far, if it werent for the fucking director

show starts 20 minutes late because she hasnt finished playbills, curtains are see through and on yhe verge of collapse at all times, they're doing this show in a HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA btw, all the costumes she got yesterday from thriftsmart, she got kids ti make all the props and set and it shows, and she never told crew what to do, so shes yelling at them constantly while giving them no direction at all. a crew kid is forced on stage at one point to turn on someones mic, he was crying

i had to comfort no less than four crying kids afterwards, all sobbing because she had yelled at them and berated them for no goddamn reason other than the thrill of the power trip

oh and btw, the second the show ended she disappeared. didnt talk to parents, cast, crew, just fucking dipped.

and you know what? im going to the show tomorrow too. i fucking quit because i forsaw this shit was going to happen, but no way in hell am i just gonna watch while these kids that i love suffer. fucking survivors guilt is a thing, and i want to kill her for making me kill myself for this goddamn show

i wouldnt be surprised if these kids hate theatre now. theyre all a bunch of talented, starry eyed young impressionable kids who she is using for her own power trips and abuse, and shes probably ruining theatre for them forever. shes hurting the people i love and forcing me to get involved again when i had already gotten out. seriously, fuck this shit, im so mad. you hurt me thats one thing. you hurt my kids? fuck you, seriously go fuck yourself.

sorry for the long fucking post, this show is so fucking awful i havent even talked about a quarter of the shit going on, theres so goddamn much of it

ill be fine, i just had so much fucking work to do this weekend that i cant get done now because of this goddamn show. if she directs the show next year i will actually kill someone, i hope she dies slowly and painfully /srs

#vent #tw vent #srry ik i never vent on here #but this shit is so awful #and im so goddamn tired of it #tl;dr powertripping director is hurting the kids i care about and survivors guilt is a bitch #theatre #zombie prom #fucking zombie prom #shit show anyeay #i hate it here

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sinfulcries · 3 years

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Okay okay okay- being draken's step dad. He's actully scared of you, you're way taller and stronger than him, and you make sure that he knows that. Nasty remarks about how weak he is or telling him how short he is. But gor some reason those actions spark desire in him. He can't really understand why but they do. Its almost like you, his so well respected step dad, are a drug to him. He's addicted to your mean comments. They make him feel so small from time to time, and who would have thought, he likes that feeling. Somebody clearly telling him im better than you. You of course notice how shy he suddenly gets around you, almost like a child looking for guidance. You don't dislike it, no not at all. But you do want to make draken yours. Use him, and you know it's wrong, he still so young and technically your son, but he's so...well cute. Today your wife is out, you and draken are alone, like always he comes to you, but this time he's wearing a big hoodie and thigh highs, and how it looks nothing under. Does he want you to lose control? The answer is yes. He's even been preparing this since some time. He's been stretching himself every evening since a week now. Trying to get your attention, wearing shorter and shorter clothing everytime he's around you. Draken can feel your eyes wandering from his chest to his thighs. He moves, making the hoddie ride up, exposing his behind. Its so, well clean, so unmarked, untouched. Knowing how wrong it is you grab him, placing him onto your lap. Nacked ass rubbing against your clothed cock.

'Feel that? You little whore made me hard, take care of it' you tell him. Draken is wiggling aroumd on your crotch, trying to get his waist out of your grip. You let him go, abd like the eager, good little step son he is, he starts undressing you. After he got rid of your pants and boxers, he settles onto the sofa again, next to you. Bending over, putting his cute, puffy hole on display. Draken starts slipping a finger into his hole, wanting to show you just how stretched he is, one fimger easily slipping in. Poor boy is so confused as you pull hus finger out again, he trys his best to look at you. But he doesn't need to worry for long, he tenses up as he feels to fingers slipping past his rim. Felling cold metal glide past his entrance. It feels so good, the eay you press onto a special spot, making him moan. God he's so in bliss, he doesn't even notice how now all of your fingers are inside him. He just notices your fist slipping into him. Pushing past his rim with almost no resistance. One of his thigh highs slipped down, giving you the chance to bite into the soft flesh. You pull your fist out, before lining yourself up with his hole. And even though he just had your entire fist in his hole hes screaming fir you to stop, that it won't fit. Hes sobbing not knowing what to do as you don't listen to him. He's filled with relief as he feels your cockhead moving away from his hole, just to tense up a few seconds after, felling something wet at his hole, looking behind him he notices that you spit in his hole. 'Wait- its never going to fit-' he tells you again tears rolling down his pretty cheeks as you push into him. Grabbing his waist, as you push him back omto your cock. 'Wont fit, what bullshit. Look at how well your little pussy is taking me' you're grabbing his waist so hard, draken just knows that that'll leave marks. Not like he cares about it. The way you pound into him makes him forget about everything around him. After a few minutes he's already cumming. Begging for you to slow down, like hell you would. You just speed up again. Fucking him at a brutal pace. It doesn't take long before draken come a second and third time. He's just babbling out random words. To dumb, to incoherent to think of anything else than your thick cock splitting him open. He can feel himself getting close again. 'M gonna cum-'

He manages to get out but this time its not cum that spurts out hus pretty little cock, no its pee. Draken his peeing all over himself and the couch.

'Look at that, you made a mess!'

'M sorry'

He slurrs out

'What a bad little girl'

You tell him, making him whimper, god being called a girl makes him feel so good, so small. He loves it.

'M gonna breed your little cunt, make you pregnant'

Draken just nods, felling another orgasm approach. As he clenches down you cum deep inside him. Tripping your dumb little slut over the edge as well. But nothing come out, he's all milked dry. Pullimg out, you skap against his red, puffy hole. Drakens legs are trembling, he's babbling out thank you's.

'Looks like my little slut is happy about finally getting his cunt stuffed."

You tell him, slapping against his hole again. Draken nods, happy and content at being filled up. He and you just watch a movie, cum leaking out of drakens hole, down his legs and staining his thigh highs. As his mother comes home again, draken his sleeping, face laying on your crotch, like its always been supposed to be there. His mother is shocked, crying as she runs into the bedroom. You don't care, her son is a way better fuck than her anyway. Yeah, you should divorce her and marry her son. Draken would be such a pretty house husband. He'd look amazing his cute little aprons and lacy underwear.

Anyway- i was bored as shit🧍‍♂️

THIS IS SUCH A MASTERPIECE The step dad x step son dynamic always gets me so hard literally, I wanna fuck Draken till he's passed out with cum dripping down his hole and when his mother walks in to be greeted with the sight of her son's fucked out body and the deep scratches on your broad back, she can't help but tear up knowing exactly how you defiled her son in your own home.

#draken thirsts

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tsukkiseasalt · 3 years

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haikyuu hc | how they act while drunk

includes: swearing, public intoxication, frustration, throwing up & a whole lotta other bs. slightly nsfw.gn reader

bokuto

somebody please get this baby some help he’s super emotional rn.

didn’t actually tell you he was drinking just said he was going to hang with akaashi.

akaashi was the one who called you & he sounded off his ass, so he gave bokuto the phone only for him to start talking about how he wishes he would have asked you to go out & how sorry he was- poor thing was on the verge of tears.

only way he’ll calm down is by calling you as you come get him.

when you get to the bar he is laying on the curb with his arm around akaashi’s leg as kaashi throws up in some bushes. kuroo is sitting on the curb writing on the concrete with a rock

how you managed to get all of them in a car will forever be a mystery-but bokuto & kuroo were sprawled out in the back seat and akaashi was slumpted over in the front seat emptying his stomach into a cardboard box you found in your trunk.

you dropped akaashi & kuroo off at their apartment with kenma.( kenma being the only actually sober person you saw that night )

“baby im sorry. please don’t be mad.” were the only words he could muster in different variations as he clung to you when you tried to get him into the house.

immediately falls onto the bed and begins crying & apologizing. the sight honestly breaks your heart.

“baby im sorry. it wasn’t my idea it was there’s. i didn’t wanna drink. im sorry. im so so sorry.” he sobs into you sleeping pants.

“hey baby you’re ok, im not mad at you. im proud of you.” you coo.

“really?” he sniffles

“yes baby, you calmed down and told me how to get to you and you didn’t even throw up.” you praise him.

a huge smile is on his face when he hears that quickly bettering his mood.

“i love you so much.” he mumbles as he pulls you down into a sloppy kiss.

the next morning he vows to never drink with akaashi again. (does the same thing in two weeks.)

oikawa

the term pissy drunk was made for this man. tells you he’s going to have a few beers with ‘the bois’ only for him to send you voice messages of him screaming careless whisper at 2 am.

did NOT want to leave when you tried to get him to leave. sat on the floor and down right refused like a fucking CHILD.

“tooru fucking oikawa get your god damn ass of that motherfucking ground right now or so help me god.”

“what are you gonna do huh? you gonna whoop my ass? nope you can’t whoop my shit so shut the hell up.”

goes fucking ballistic when you threaten to breakup with him & breaks a table in the process.

iwazumi finally gets pissed enough and helps you get him out & in your car.

lays in the back seat and sobs, begging for you to stay with him.

“you know tooru desperation doesn’t look good on you.”

ballistic pt.2

“EVERYTHING LOOKS GOOD ON ME SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU DONT APPRECIATE ME. I HATE YOU.”

this mf ugly crying snot and all.

when you make it home he tells you he doesn’t need your help with a damn thing and that he can get his self to bed.

failed miserably and fell on the ground immediately after opening the door. (cue the waterworks)

“baby please help me i need you. im sorry i’m being a jack ass help me please.” he mumbles sweetly wrapping his arms around you as you lug him in.

“just leave me here.” he sniffles when you make it into the living room. you drop him on the couch and go to bed.

wakes up with the meanest hangover and makes dinner for the next week as an apology.

tanaka

angry drunk. on sight type night with him.

bringing him to the party was possibly the worst decision you could have possibly made. within the 45 minutes you two had been there he had taken 4 shots, downed 2, and chugged everything within a 2 foot radius. safe to say he was thoroughly buzzed.

“babe if anybody and i mean ANYBODY looks at you tell me and i’ll kill them.” he exclaims hands snaking around your waist.

the only place your allowed to sit is on his lap. (yes you can feel his hard on)

plays beer pong with noya against kageyama and tsukki ( tsukki’s actually really fucking good) & looses.

he and noya then proceed to try an jump tsukki.

“fuck you you four eyes bastard.” he yells as daichi wraps his arms around him. “yeah, your a filthy cheater.” noya chimes as asahi picks him up and takes him outside. “i’ll be back tanaka & when i get back we beating his ass.”

after that you decide to take him home.

his hand doesn’t leave your thigh as you drive home. this boys hOrnY.

constantly tries to convince you to let him taste you as you drive home.

“ryūnosuke stop it now.”

“fuck babe say my name like that again and i’m gonna have to take you right here and now.” he groans palming himself through his sweats.

when you get him in bead his hands are gripping your ass and his head buried in your chest.

“i love you so much babe.” he mumbles before passing out.

kageyama

super lightweight.

had one shot and a wine cooler now he can’t walk straight.

“honey *hicup* my tummy hurts *hicup*”

“tobio sweety you haven’t even drank that much.” you say stroking his head.

you have to leave early because he has to pee and refuses to go anywhere other than his own bathroom.

end up pulling on the side of the road because he almost pissed his pants in the car.

“can you help me get my pants up?” he asks leaning against the tree for support.

strips down to his underwear in your car cause he’s hot even though you have the ac blasting.

“babe i think i have alcohol *hicup* poisoning.

“you do not have alcohol poisoning tobio.”

when you open the door to get him inside he throws up on the floor and immediately passes out.

wakes up in the middle of the night crying though because his stomach hurts.

you turn on cars and rub his tummy till he goes back to sleep.

i wrote half of this while i was blackout drunk at a party last night soo please ignore the grammar mistakes🥺

#haikyu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyu headcanons #kageyama #hq tanaka #hq x you #bokuto x reader #oikawa x reader #bokuto imagine

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sweater-daddiesdumbdork · 3 years

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Wilfords Demands: Separated

Summary- 5.6k Curtis x You. Curtis lost the tournament and has been cast back to his original home, the tail end. You are now contained in Wilfords precious engine to see the crazy ramblings of Snowpiercers Leader. You also must find out Curtis’s fate and you believe you can find him, if you can just get beyond that door Wilford likes to disappear into. Dividers made by @firefly-graphics

Warnings- Stressful situations, spitting, hitting, demeaning talk, threats, language. You also find out what happened with Curtis’s other children, its dark and upsetting. Proceed reading with caution. Thats as descriptive as Im going to get in that warning.

Chapter 6 / Wilfords Demands Masterlist

As you were dragged away, you could hear the cheers echoing off the steel walls. You could feel the overwhelming sensation of panic settling in your chest. It was all consuming as you started struggling against the man dragging you behind Claude, trying to pummel your fists against his padded chest and scratch at him.

“Let me go! CURTIS!” you screamed, resorting to trying to bite at his hand wrapped around your upper arm. Claude scoffed seeing you give the guard a hard time and snapped over quickly, open palmed, she slapped your face to stun you.

You panic turned to white hot rage at the woman, turning on her but the man tightened his grip, stopping all your movements.

“For once in your miserable fucking life, will you stop it?! Jesus Christ you are not worth the effort Wilford puts in you. You don't even make a good whore.” She spit in your face before turning back to open the door to Wilford’s chambers once more, jerking her head to direct the guard to bring you in. “He will be back soon, make sure she doesn’t do something stupid can you? Just don't hurt her, Wilford will have both our heads if anything happens to the precious prize.”

She sneered out the last words at you, You spat at her with a smug smile when it landed on her face. She screamed in disgust and wiped at her face with her sleeve. “Tail Ender Pig, you are all so disgusting.” continuing to mutter as she left the room, the guard released you, standing at the door and his eyes followed you as you were sure to put distance between the two of you.

Wilford’s area was the same as before. More luxurious than the others, you went towards the engine, the furthest you could get from the guard when he barked out. “That's far enough.”

Flipping him the bird, you moved to sit in a nearby chair, rubbing at your belly protectively.

Right now the anger was the only thing controlling your fear. You had no idea what was going to happen to Jace, was Curtis even still alive. You couldn’t think like that, because you would lose it if Curtis was dead.

He promised you that he would find a way, swore to you.

But promises made were not always kept. You swiped at your face furiously to hide the tears, thinking about Curtis would have to come later, when it actually could sink in. For now Curtis was still alive, he would come for Jace, that was all that mattered.

Time seemed to stretch, tension building when you heard the door shift open. The guard stepped aside and Wilford walked in, followed by Grey who was bloody, limping and spotting several cuts and bruises.

I hope you feel every single one Curtis gave you, you hissed in your mind looking at him before turning away.

“Well look at you sweetheart, told you we would be getting to know each other better.” His hand came to stroke your cheek and you jerked away, making him laugh. “Soon enough you will learn not to pull away.” Grey said while Wilford handed him some towels to clean himself up.

“As promised, she is your prize. You just have to wait till after the birth.”

You shifted in your seat, your hand still protective over your stomach to face Wilford, ignoring Grey for now. “Where is Curtis?”

“Well she isn't going to be much longer till she spits out that spawn for you. I don't mind waiting.” Grey spoke over you, ignoring your question.

“Weeks Grey, not long at all.” Wilford flipped to a calendar, and to your disgust you saw where he had appointments set up with the doctor. Your name, some others, you shuddered at it.

“Is Curtis still alive?” You started again, but both men ignored you once again when you finally gave a scream, willing them to at least acknowledge you.

Wilford blinked at you calmly while Grey scowled at you. “Curtis really didn't teach you any manners did he? Know what we are doing first.”

You hitched your chin, refusing to back away from him in fear.

“Curtis is no longer your concern Y/N.” Wilford started. “You won't be seeing him again.”

Your eyes welled up at these words and your face pinched trying to process these. You can't break down right now. Jace needs you to keep it together.

“Fine, but this child is my concern. I need to know what his future is going to be.”

Wilford broke in a grin at this one, rubbing his hands together. “Of course, you spent all this effort supplying me with Curtis’s child. I have high hopes for this one.”

Fuck you were going to be sick, listening to him. “I want to raise him, he is mine as you said.”

Grey cocked a brow, his arms folding over his chest with a laugh, Wilford joining him. “Ah- no. This child is mine. I already have a name. Trust me, that whole Jace Tyler was cute and all, I heard all about why you wanted that name but no. Joseph Wilford the second will become my successor. Hopefully. Curtis was always my favorite.”

You spared a look at Grey who’s features clouded slightly but then went back to victorious. “Well Curtis is washed out, past his prime now.” He pointed out and Wilford shrugged a bit.

“Happens to all of us. Why I needed Y/N to get pregnant rather quickly, before the tournament. I'm still taking a risk, but such a pretty thing who's a survivor from the tail end. I like Joseph’s chances. So for now Dear, your stuff is being removed from Curtis’s quarters, being moved into Grey’s. For now though you will be staying with me. Grey, how about you go get cleaned up, celebrate your victory.”

Grey gave one final swipe of his towel, smirking. “I think I will just do that.” Cold eyes swept over you, possessive now. “I will see you real soon.” Sure to run his fingers over you again and grasp your chin tightly when you tried to pull away, his touch hurt, bit into you as he dug fingernails into your skin to mark you. “Keep up that act, I like breaking women in.”

Letting you go with a cruel laugh, he left the engine. Wilford seemed oblivious to your distress. “Come Dear, let me show you your cot. You need to rest. Most certainly, can't have you stressing the baby.” He tugged you to a stand, leading you to a corner near the engine humming and pushed you to sit. “See this is pretty good.”

You couldn't help it anymore, everything you had hoped for had shattered in moments. You curled as much as you could away from Wilford rubbing your back and sobbed into your arm, mourning Jace’s father.

Curtis first noticed the pain. It riddled him hotly with every sway of the train's movements. His fingers curled against rough fabric underneath him. When he tried to move pain seared through him everywhere making him grit his teeth and sink back into the hardness beneath him. “Don’t try to move mister, Mama said you needed to stay still.” came a young boy's voice near his ear and Curtis strained his neck to look next to him, nothing but shadows and more darkness filling his vision but then movement caught his attention.

A boy, young by the looks of him but it was hard to tell without proper lighting. Big eyes stared at him though as the boy crawled closer to him. “Where am I kid?” Curtis grunted out as the boy lifted a gelatin block to his mouth and took a bite.

“This the back of the train Mister.” He shoved the block at Curtis, setting it on his chest. “I will go get my Mama. You can have some if you're hungry.” The boy smiled and crawled away, dropping away from sight and scurrying off. Curtis curiously picked up the block and sniffed at it, wrinkling his nose at the smell and set it off to the side. With a groan he tried to sit up again, but gasped again in pain. “Fuck!”

“Fuck is right.” A woman came into view, carrying a lantern with her to light up her way and sat at the edge of the bed. The little boy crawled in on the other side and grabbed at the gelatin block to bite into again, squeezing it a bit in his small hands, humming happily at his food.

“Mama, I thought you said that's a bad word.”

“It is Timmy, but he's allowed to say it. Go on now, shoo. Let me talk to this man.” she waved her hands at him and yet again the little boy, giggling this time climbed upwards into what looked like more bedding above Curtis.

She watched him with a soft smile till the boy was gone, then turned her attention back to Curtis. “That's my baby Timmy and my name is Tonya.”

Curtis frowned a bit at the name, then it clicked. “I remember you…” he grunted and Tonya smiled with a nod.

“I remember you to, but back then you were still a youngin’. Barely 17, still young and hot headed. If you are back here, I’m assuming you're still hot headed?” Tonya chuckled as Curtis tried once more to sit up, and she pushed against his chest to press him back down. “Whoever did this to you did a number on you. Mostly your ribs and possibly your shoulder. You are gonna have to just stay put for a while.”

Curtis worked his shoulders and she was correct, the pain in his collarbone and down his back was enough to make him see sparks. “Yup, I have to agree. And not hot headed… There was a tournament and… Fuck.” This time he surged up to a sit with a yell, holding onto steel grating above him, gasping. “I have to get out of here right away. They took her and I promised to keep her safe, keep our son safe.”

Tonya shook her head confused. “Who? What are you talking about? You should lay back down.”

Curtis stubbornly swung his feet over the edge of the bunk and moved to sit on the edge, looking around. More and more of it was familiar. In the years he had been up front, none of it had changed. Except there was less crowding then before.

“Y/N, she's up at the front and in serious trouble. Fuck.” He swore again and pushed to a stand, bracing his hand against the framework and tried to make sense of where the door was. Tonya was right next to him, following along.

“Wait, Y/N? She's up there still alive?”

“Yes.” Curtis weaved among other people and Tonya tried making him stop. “She was in my care, Wilford… “ He came to a stop at a steel door, looking it over to see any way to open it. “Wanted her to get pregnant with my child. Once he has what he wants, he is just gonna throw her to monsters.” he hissed while pressing his hands against the door.

“You are not getting that door open Curtis.” Tonya wedged her way next to him and made him turn around, being as week as he was at the moment. “You are telling me shes pregnant? Our Y/N is pregnant?” Her eyes glowered at him and he squared his shoulders slightly.

“Yes, due anytime now. I told you, she was brought to me for a reason. It wasnt what either of us wanted but…” He turned back to the door and up towards the ceiling, looking for cameras or anything to get someone's attention. “... It turned into something more. And I need to get to her now.” His gaze turned intense looking at Tonya. Her hands were at her hips accusing but then her gaze softened a bit and she sighed.

“There is no way out Curtis, don't you think we have tried? Its a box, a prison. This is hell on earth and you are now stuck in it with us.”

Curtis could feel his breath quickening and his heart racing.

He had to get out of here, he had to get to you.

Time seemed to turn meaningless while you stayed with Wilford. He had the doctor monitor you daily, check constantly for the moments you went into labor. But you shut down, not talking or acknowledging the others around you unless you were forced into it. Wilford though didn't seem to notice. He talked all the time. Rambled joyfully about everything to do with the engine. Tinkering away at little things in it, tightening screws and bolts. Running inspections. “Dear this whole train keeps us alive. And it needs so much care and love.” He would sing softly as his hands stroked along the metal wall. “Just a gentle touch for our sweetheart here.”

You would curl up your legs onto your cot, or try to, it was hard with your belly. He was fucking crazy the way he spoke to the engine. The constant hum of the engine and the spinning didn't help either, it made your head pound till you felt like you were also going to go a bit mad in the room with him.

The nights though were the worst. The engine would seem louder without Wilford’s constant chatter. You would stretch on your cot across the room from Wilford, who slept in a large plush bed. It was hard, almost impossible to get comfortable and relax. It wasn't because the cot actually bothered you, you spent years either in a hard bunk or leaning against a wall in the tail end.

Instead you were used to sleeping with Curtis. His body would be pressed in against yours, his arm wrapped around you to hold you close and your head would be cushioned on his chest or shoulder, or a hand draped over his stomach. He was warm and safe. That is what you missed. Your hands would rub your belly, sniffling to yourself. You refused to let yourself cry in front of Wilford. But in the night when your only company was the hum of the engine, you let yourself talk to Jace about Curtis.

How much you missed his father, letting yourself mourn for him because it was the times you thought maybe he actually didn't make it. Those thoughts you cursed yourself, because he couldn’t be gone. He hadn't even gotten to meet his son. The nights were the hardest, the only time you didn't have to pretend to not exist and it would become overwhelming. When it became too much you would sing softly to your belly.

Don't take my sunshine away.

The only thing unusual about the engine was the door. Just a door near the spinning blue lights that made the engine come to life that you studied. It was better than going into a trance watching the blue orbs circle slowly. Wilford would once in a while disappear into the room and wouldn't come back out. Just a few times you leaned just right in your cot when he disappeared into the room, catching sight of computer monitors. That had to be how Wilford was watching all of you.

That made you shiver, the idea Wilford watched you and Curtis doing everyday things. You didn't even want to think of what else he spied on. But more importantly if you could get in there, maybe you could find Curtis. Or see if he was still alive.

One morning Wilford was cooking what you guessed was supposed to be breakfast. The smell of onions, potatoes and eggs was making your stomach roll viciously. Curtis had always made sure no eggs made it into the room. Wilford wasn't quite as considerate. You were just coming out of the bathroom, having rinsed your mouth out when the smell hit you all over again. Luckily nothing was left to come up.

“Sweetheart, just think when I have Jr, I will have him ready to take over the engine.” Wilford said cheerfully, sliding eggs onto a plate with a sickening splatter. Your stomach did another roll, and you did your best not to gag. It didn't click with his Jr. spiel, since you never thought of your son as anything other than Jace Tyler. Wilford slid a plate on a small table near your cot for you. “Go ahead eat, I want Jr big and strong like his sire. Make his Poppa proud.” He turned away and you ignored the eggs, recalling his earlier statement.

“Take over the engine?”

Wilford made a show of cracking another egg into a bowl, holding up the shell. “Did you know these would be extinct if it wasn't for me? Something so simple… “ He studied it before tossing it into a nearby garbage bucket. “No more chickens. Or oranges like you have in that glass next to you. Fresh squeezed by the way. No more bread.” He picked up two slices of thick sliced bread. “Nor butter, because cows would be extinct.” He dropped them into a pan to crisp and sizzle. “Everything Y/N would be extinct, if it wasn't for our Snowpiercer.” he flipped his eggs and slid them onto his plate.

You remained quiet, refusing the eggs, the toast and the juice he had set on the table, watching him.

“But I won't last forever. I can fix this train, but there is no way to replace my body parts. So next best thing. Make the perfect replacement.” He went to his table and sat down. “Why I searched you out for Curtis. Women in the front, been ruined in less then twenty years we have been on this train.” He said disgusted as he started to eat, shoveling a forkful of eggs into his mouth and chewing. The yellow burst of yolk on his lip certainly made you gag this time, covering your mouth while trying to turn away.

“No, I needed someone smart enough to survive but also untouched.” His grin turned cool as his eyes raked over you. “You survived the tail end, were strong enough to survive the lockbox as well as stunning, how you came out of there a virgin I don't know. But it worked out for me. Perfect for Curtis. All his other children before, just weren't perfect enough.” Another forkful of runny eggs and toast. You were struggling trying to wrap your mind around what Wilford was saying.

“W-what happened to the others?” You asked shakily, scared of the answer.

“Ahh, they didn't work out. We tried, sometimes the babies wouldn't shut up, other times they got to a certain age and would struggle with the motor skills. There were a few who got sickly.” Wilford shrugged as he sopped at his plate with his bread and popped that into his mouth. You though, your arms circled around yourself protectively as the horror of what he was saying made your heart race.

“You just- got rid of them?”

“Of course, I can't keep them if they can’t be useful. That's when it clicked. Curtis, he was fine. He's everything I wanted, big, strong, smart. Until you came along, he thought logically. It's a flaw, his falling for you, made him weak. But nothing I can't overlook I suppose. So many other perfect qualities in a leader. It was the woman.” He carried his plate to the sink and approached you. You shrunk back on your cot and he cupped your face in delicate warm hands, hands that never did hard work. “I needed a strong woman to match. All the front end bitches I paired with him threw off weaklings. You Sweetheart are going to give me the perfect prodigy. I considered switching Curtis for Grey for a while, but ahh he is too volatile to throw me a good son. No, it had to be Curtis and You.” He brushed your cheek gently and then grasped your hair to yank you forward towards the plate of food. “Now eat this gift I give you, because I need that baby to come out healthy.”

Claude entered the room, clipboard in hand with a smile. “Sir if you're all set, we are ready for the inspection in the greenhouse.”

“Oh yes Claude, be right there.” He beamed as he pointed at your tray of food with a snap of his fingers. “I want this gone.” Turning he made his way to Claude, the two of them chatting as they left the room, leaving you all alone.

Your heart raced and breathing came out in a rush. With a swipe of your hand, you pushed the plate and glass off the table to shatter against the floor in a mess, screaming in a shrill burst. Overwhelmed with what he informed you, you couldn't hold it all back anymore, your scream just got shriller and tense to bounce all around you from the steel walls. Your voice ended up giving out with a croak and you dropped your heads into your hands sobbing at the fate of your son.

You can't let this happen, just can't. This isn't what you or Curtis wanted for Jace. Your head lifted and eyes were wildly looking around the room, trying to figure something out. Attacking Wilford would do nothing. You could possibly hold him at knife point, but it would only be a matter of time before you were captured again, and it would just be worse for you and Jace if you had managed to kill Wilford. No, it needed to be more permanent. Something that would overthrow the whole train.

Your eyes fell to the door, the door with all the monitors and control panels. You needed to be in that room and that's when a plan started to form.

Although Curtis couldn’t find a way out of the tail end didn’t mean he wasn’t busy. Curtis started to get to know more about the tailenders, those who were ready to fight for there freedom, those with special skills that could be used in a revolt, listen to the stories of the horrors they have had to do to survive. It became more then simply getting back to you, now it was about getting these people out of here as well.

Curtis started timing the guards coming through, trying to figure out how to work the inspections and feeding times to his advantage. After all this time, they should be fairly slack, rituals loose purpose after a while.

But he didnt see his opening. No matter how many times he timed the lengths the doors were open, how long they stayed, how hard the cart full of the blocks were to manuever. It was all so precise, the same everytime and there eyes were watchful, always willing to bash a tailender should they step out of line.

There was just four counts when all the doors were open and Curtis could see down the length of the train. It just wasnt enough time to get through several train cars. Tonya was perched next to him, listening to him count under his breath.

“Curtis, don’t. We’ve tried that. It just ends with them culling us.” She hurriedly whispered back to him. Once they left he turned to her.

“Then what Tonya? Y/N might have had Jace and tossed to Grey. Who even knows what will happen to my son.” Some frustrated tears caught in his lashes and some managed to escape, making a track down his now sooty dirty face. He dropped his head into his hands and Tonya rubbed at his back, trying to be supportive even though she delivered the harsh reality.

“I know Curtis…I’m sorry, I just don’t want you going on a suicide mission. Y/N needs you, so does that little boy you got coming.”

Curtis took a ragged sigh and stared back up at the camera beeping above the door, flipping it off before pushing to a stand and disappearing out of sight to continue trying to figure out a way to get back to you.

You waited, you could be patient. You learned a while ago when you first joined Curtis to watch, it was also the harsh lesson he taught you in the beginning. It was how you got to know him as the man you cared for today. You were quick to learn that Wilford wasn't predictable. He would go into the room at random times. Sometimes for hours, sometimes for a few minutes.

No matter how much you looked around the engine from your perch on your cot, you couldn't see where there were any cameras in the engine room. But you were still wary. Thinking maybe he was trying to catch you doing something, spring out of that room with a gotcha.

But you were smarter. No, you were patient. Storing it all away.

The worst was when Grey would come around. He seemed to turn into Wilford’s pet, always coming in to chat with him or ask favors. Oftentimes he would sit across the table, staring intently at you with a sneer. His eyes roaming you up and down like he had a right to take you whenever. These times you would hitch your chin up and stare back at him. Refusing to give him the satisfaction that he won.

Maybe he did win your body. But you refused outright to give him any satisfaction in that. It didn't matter though, for Grey you were just a prize. You didn't matter to him except what you could give him.

“She must be due soon, right?” Grey drawled out, moving to a stand and approaching you. In your bid to defy him, you didn't move an inch to draw away from him. His hand fisted in your hair, twisting viciously to have you look up at him. “Excited right? I'm sure it gets a bit boring just sitting here on your cot, waiting for time to pass with that little bastard inside of you.”

You work your mouth to draw out some spit, hocking it at him as best you can at the unnatural angle. It earned you a loud smack, whipping your head to the side. Not a word dropped from you in pain as you glared up at him. Grey leaned in closer, his hand wiping at his face and wiping his hand clean in your hair he still had fisted in his other hand.

“Nasty little thing arn’t you? Treat Curtis like this? Or did you just drool all over his cock every chance you get?” His fingers bit into your cheeks as he pressed harshly against the hinge of your jaw, wrenching your mouth open. “Don't worry, soon this will be all you know.” He spat in your open mouth, making you heave and try to pull away from him as he lewdly groped his crotch, laughing at your distress.

“Grey, leave her alone… you will have her soon enough.” Wilford finally interjected, beckoning Grey forward towards the room. “I got something to show you anyways, step in here.”

Grey snickered at you before sauntering over, passing through the door and Wilford followed him in, closing themselves in. You grabbed at some of the bedding, bringing a corner of a blanket to your mouth to try to tear at the fabric. You just needed a little bit.

Your teeth ripped into the cloth and stitches, wrenching at the fabric till you could feel it weakening.

Another pull, another twist and you could feel the fabric starting to give. Your eyes darted back to the door. “Come on…” You whined out and then there was a distinctive rrrriiippp…

Balling the small bit of fabric in your fist, you got up to approach the door. Careful you pressed your ear to it, trying to listen over the engines humming, but it was pointless. The whoosh whoosh whoosh of the spinning mechanisms made you sigh in exasperation. You didn't want to ruin your chance by not being prepared.

Pressing against the wall, you tried to think about what you knew. The door was pressured close to guarantee a seal. Your eyes roving up to the mechanism that worked the door. It also made it close slow. You could wait a good five seconds after they left the room to do what you wanted. You could pretend you were passing by to go to the bathroom, seeing the door was just beyond your main target. Stepping back a few steps, you paused. Eyes on the handle, waiting for them to walk back out, swing the door wide open.

It felt like hours till the handle jiggled and sure enough it swung wide open with both men leaving, laughing about some shared joke between one another. You started counting just like the way your Grandpa showed you when you were a kid playing hide and seek in the apple orchard.

One Mississippi

You stepped forward as if you had been striding from your cot, which neither of you bothered to give a glance. The door clicked into reverse.

Two Mississippi

Your chest clenched seeing the door start to close, the two men were a step away from you now where you could pass between them and the door.

Three Mississippi

In passing, you rolled the ball of fabric in your palm, your hand brushing against the inside of the door jam and nimbly shoved the ball into the hole that would seal the door shut. Continuing on past.

Four Mississippi

You paused at the bathroom door, your hand giving a shiver of anxiety while listening before opening the bathroom door. Please don't latch, please don't latch….

Five Mississippi

The door shut, but there was no distinctive click the door handle locked. You glanced over your shoulder to see it looked sealed. You yanked on the bathroom handle and escaped into the bathroom, covering your mouth as a gasp of relief escaped you, tears brimming your eyes at knowing it worked. Now it was just hoping Wilford left before he found out what you had done. Sinking to the floor, you took several breaths to try to calm your racing heart. Tilting your head back and closing your eyes, your hands pressed against your belly, whispering. “Jace, we are gonna find your daddy and figure it out from there. Right kiddo… we got this. We are going to be okay.”

After giving yourself your pep talk and you weren't feeling like Wilford was going to figure it out and bust through that door, you made your way back out to see Claude had joined Wilford and Grey.

“Well I need to go do my inspections.” Wilford motioned towards to exit, Grey took a glance at you shuffling back to your cot. Coldly he looked you up and down, obviously checking you out.

“Will be seeing you soon Y/N.” You didn't respond, looking away as you lowered down onto your cot. He left and Wilford reached out for a clipboard Claude was holding, scanning over several papers. “What's the numbers on the tailenders?”

“High hundreds. We took a count this morning. Its getting overcrowded once again.”

“Ahh, I know it was getting bad once more. Gonna have to do something about that.” Wilford sighed. “Just need to get creative about it.” You did your best to keep from retaliating. “And how's our special guest there?”

This made you perk, curious as to who he would be talking about. “Oh settling in nicely, like he never left.” Claude retorted as the door opened, and you couldn't stop the flutter of hope. Maybe it was Curtis.. Could be Curtis they were talking about. The door slammed shut and you started to count.

Wilford could stay away anywhere from ten minutes to an hour. As anxiously as you wanted to run to the door and go in the room of cameras, you couldn't do it too soon. Wilford would just rush back in and stop you. All this effort, lost.

So you waited. Counting like before till you were sure it had been a good ten minutes. Easing off the cot, you approached the door and rested your hand to the door handle.

God let this work. You screwed your eyes shut and started to ease back, the door moving just as easily as if it was properly unlocked. Not even a turn of the handle. Slipping inside and pulling out the fabric from the hollow spot in the door, you let it shut you in.

Camera, so many grainy moving pictures, it made your head thump with the intake of information. You started moving from screen to screen, searching faces to try to find Curtis. No matter how many you looked through, searching the garden cars, over to the kitchen crew, entertainment cars full of kronole high individuals, none of them had Curtis. You made your way down the line, cars with animals, people making equipment, prison cars. Still no Curtis. You bit at your lip, your fingertips pressing against screens, like you were crossing off people.

“Come on Curtis, I need you to show yourself.” You passed to the last row, people all from the tail end. You leaned in close, mentally crossing off sections till you stopped at the door. It was a flash of familiarity that brought you back to that screen.

“Jace… I found your daddy.” Your voice broke in relief, seeing him studying the door and camera, scowling up at it. You remember that look, the one that he was frustrated with his situation. You had never been so relieved to see him looking pissed off. “Thank fucking god you are still alive Curtis.” You fell back to sink in an office chair. “Now how do I get you out?”

#wilfords demands #curtis everett x reader #curtis everett x you #tw: children deaths #curtis everett fan fiction #snowpiercer fan fiction #curtis everett au #snowpiercer au #amber writes #sweater writes

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weeb-writor · 4 years

Text

Do you still love me?

Hello lovelies! Today I am back with a angst piece but a happy ending don't fret too much! I was really thinking about making it end horribly or leaving it up to the readers imagination but I decided nahh i couldn't do that to my heart. So here Bakugou and his s/o who fell out of love??(or did they??) when then have a large family in the mix. I have also decided im kind of obsessed with domestic pieces lol, they are like more than half of all my posts. Anywho, reader is neutral hope you guys enjoy!

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Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

You and Bakugou call its quits not thinking of what it would do to your 5 kids who are stuck in the middle

Words: 3606

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“Are we going to dad’s today?” Hiroyuki asked softly.

“Yeah, your going to spend the weekend with him, all of you.” You smiled at him.

“Can I bring Tokki?” He said looking at the ground already knowing your answer.

“We went over this last time baby, Daddy can't have pets at his new place and Tokki is a cat, he likes staying at home.” You said with a sigh. It really sucks that it came down to this, spend a week with you then a weekend with dad, then rinse repeat. Sometimes you even wondered if it was better. That’s what you and Bakugou told each other, I mean what else can you do when you fall out of love? You approached your car where all of your other children were waiting. You and Hiroyuki sat down and signaled the diver to go.

“We going to daddy’s right?” Kohana said as she bounced around in her seat. You booped her nose and nodded at her.

“Yay, daddy’s home!” Yoko said, clapping.

“Don't get excited Yoko, Dad’s probably busy. Were probably gonna be with Grandpa and Grandma.” Hiroyuki said playing with your fingers.

“You're so dramatic Yuki! Of course dad is busy! He is a Hero but he always makes time for us.” Your oldest said little explosion going off around her.

“Kaori.” You warned her with a stern voice. The little sparks calmed and she went back to quietly gazing out the window.

“Your dad is a hero and therefore busy but I know he is very excited to see you all and will spend all the time he has with you.” You smiled at them. They all smiled back before going back into relative silence. When you and Bakugou decided to have a big family you were ecstatic and so was he. This, however, wasn't what you imagined. A tiny rift right threw your family and it was growing bigger everyday. When you told the kids about the spilt they didnt say much and the youngest ones didnt even really understand but as they lived through it, they changed. They formed their own opinions about who’s fault it is and why it happened. And now they were splitting up, there was Kaori the eldest who didn't care too much, Yoko, and Kohana. At the opposite end was Hiroyuki, just him. Your fragile little boy who was so sure it was his dad’s fault. Saiyuri was too young to choose a side but all the change wasn't really helping the 11th month old baby.

“We have arrived.” The diver announced. You thanked him while getting everyone out of the seats and exiting the car. Bakugou lived in an apartment now at the tippy top of course. It was a long and loud elevator ride as your kids were antsy to see their dad. When it opened Bakugou was standing there waiting for them and was immediately met with an armful of girls.

“Daddy! I missed you so much!” Kohana said almost in tears.

“Misses Daddy.” Yoko echoed her sister.

“Yeah, I missed all you brats too, you better have been on your best behavior! You have to keep up the Bakugou reputation.” He teased them

“Of course we have! I'm still number one in my quirk development classes. Yuki has the best grades in all of his grade. Kohana is reading at a 3rd grade level already and Yoko and Saiyuri are everyone's favorite at the Daycare!” Kaori said with vigor.

“Yeah, your all Bakugou’s for sure.” He chuckled at them. He turned to talk to Hiroyuki but he was gone. You heard a door shut, he was probably already in his room.

“I've got homework to do dad and them we should do something all together!” Kaori said kissing his check before taking off. Her sisters followed her as usual.

“How long do you think he’ll be like that?” Bakugou asked you with a sigh.

“Honestly I don't know, it's not like I tell him awful things about you. Maybe it would have been better if we did cause then he would have one thing to be angry about, one event, It would be easier than him just being angry at you.” You said placing Saiyuri onto the ground to walk around.

“They’re so mature and smart I forget they’re so young. Hell we don't understand why it happened, you can't just pinpoint a time where you fell outta love, it’s gradual. So how can we expect them too.” Bakugou said, sounding in pain.

“Yeah, sucks they had to witness it. I’ve got to go meet up with someone but just… He thinks you’re going to call your parents and abandon them to do Hero work. I know you can't put off everything but I think he just wants to know that for once he can come first to you.” You said as you kissed Saiyoui’s forehead. You were about to enter the elevator when a weight crashed into you. You didn't have to look down too far to see Hiroyuki hugging you.

“Take care of Tokki, please.”

“Yes and you make sure you and your sisters behave for your dad.” He sighed but nodded at you. You gave him one last hair ruffle before leaving. You couldn't help but think this wasn't ever gonna get any easier. You sighed before heading to the next destination, a café to meet with a few of your friends.

“Y/N!” You heard a voice call to you as soon as you opened the door. You identified the voice as Mina.

“Mina! Long time no see!” You said giving her a hug.

“Y/n, dear come sit down.” Momo said smiling at you, you sat down with the group.

“How are you doing.” Mina asked you cautiously

“I’m surprisingly doing awful, I see Bakugou too much to truly get over him. The kids are still adjusting to us being apart and Hiroyuki has been really upset and distant. I thought breaking up would fix a lot but it just made everything worse.” You sighed out.

“Well of course it did!!!” Urakara whisper yelled.

“You and Bakugou called it quits way too soon! I've never seen someone handle Bakugou the way you do. I’ve never seen anyone love him like you. Hell Bakugou loves you so much it’s ridiculous! Do you remember when he was gonna put his hero work on hold because of Kaori! I’m sorry y/n but I’m not buying this fell out of love thing.” Deku rushed out.

“Mm I’d have to agree. If there is anything I’ve learned from being friends with Bakugou it’s that he never half ass anything and if he put time into it he’s gonna see it through till the end so, logically it doesn’t make sense.” Todoroki said quietly.

“Yeah so what’s your side of the story?” Mina asked carefully.

“I… loved him, you know and when we had kids it only intensified but now it’s different. Bakugou is a great dad don’t get me wrong but he’s absent and that was fine when it was just me, Kaori, Hiroyuki, and Kohana but now there is Yoko and Saiyuri. It’s hard when they all have different school times and different needs cause of their ages. It’s hard because I had to put part of my life on hold, I went to UA too and I was supposed to be one of the greatest support people out there, every agency would want me. But it was Bakugou’s dream first so I sacrificed it all in a heartbeat. Over the years he just got more busy and I got more left behind. I’m tired of waiting up till 3am to make sure he’s alright knowing I have to be up at 7 to get the kids ready for school. I… love him and I don’t want to argue with him and I could feel myself growing angry at him, feel myself growing resentful. So I brought it up under the disguise of “do you still love me” and he said No… so that was that and we were done the next week.” You said not meeting their eyes. They just looked at you with wide eyes.

“Y/n I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt like this.” Momo said softly.

“It’s fine, he is the love of my life and our kids are my everything so I would do it all again, just for them.” You smiled with a few tears cascading down your face.

“You haven’t tried to talk to him about this, you still love him, you guys can fix this.” Deku said almost mumbling.

“But he doesn’t love me and so there is nothing to talk about. Now come on let’s talk about something else. You can hear sob stories like mine anytime.” You waved them off. They were hesitant but the conversation did pick up about their lives and your time at UA, at least the happy parts. The rest of your two days without your kids were a blur. You just remember waking up with your phone going off a Monday.

“Hello is this Bakugou Y/n?” A women’s said. The title hurt just a bit.

“Yes it is.” You responded drowsily.

“I am very sorry you have to receive a call like this but your son Bakugou Hiroyuki has been rushed to the hospital, his sister did refuse to leave his side so she is there as well.” You were silent before hanging up and immediately calling Bakugou.

“What’s up?” He rushed out. He sounded panicked so he must have gotten a call too.

“I need you to pick up Yoko and Saiyuri.” You said rushing to put in on your clothes.

“What? But yuki is in the hospital, we’ve got to be there.” He said

“Yes but they are done with daycare in.” You paused to look at the clock on your way out the door. “A hour. If we don’t get them now we’ll have to leave him to get them.” You said finally in your car.

“Yeah and he would rather be with you than me…” he trailed off.

“I didn’t say that.” You rushed out

“You didn’t need to, I'll get them and be there as soon as I can.” He said hanging up. You sighed and continued your drive to the hospital. When you got there you rushed to the room where you looked in and saw your son unconscious and Kaori laying next to him.

“So he is going to be okay, we do want him to remain here for another day or two.” The doctor said to you, smiling.

“Okay but what’s wrong with him.”

“Well he hasn’t been eating or drinking or sleeping enough, especially for a boy experiencing his growth spurt. Pair that with how much he has been using his quirk in class and you have a pretty bad situation.” She said as if it was nothing to worry about.

“Uhhh okay so we just need to make sure he is eating and drinking right?” You said pacing a little.

“Yeah and I would figure out what made him stop. Your daughter was very adamant about it not being abuse just that there was something going on at home and he is trying to deal with it.” The doctor said as you froze thinking you did this to him.

“Just a divorce…” you trailed off.

“Yeah that will do it but I don’t need to know about it. It's your business just make sure to talk to him so you don’t end up back here.” She said before leaving, you let out a few tears before heading into the room. Noticing you, Kaori got up and was hugging you tighter than she ever had.

“Did you know he wasn’t taking care of himself?” You asked, stroking her hair. She shook her head no.

“I didn’t either, I didn’t know it was hitting him so hard… you know you can ask me about anything, tell me anything… me and your dad will always be in your corner.” You said lifting her chin so you gazed into her eyes.

“But you're both not in our corner anymore. You guys are in to different corners and it’s hard to keep up with two different houses and two different.. well everything’s.” She said looking away from you.

“I never meant to you guys to feel like this, I just…” You trailed off but before you could finish Hiroyuki tossed and turned in his bed.

“Yuki sweetie, can you hear me?” You said as you rushed to his side.

“Mmm.” He said, he’s eyes still shut in pain.

“Oh baby, i'm so sorry I didn't notice you were in pain. It’s never gonna happen again, okay? Do you need something?” You said stroking his hair, he hummed before falling back to sleep. You sighed and kissed his forehead.

“So whats up with him?” Bakugou rushed into the room with the girls in his arms.

“He hasn’t been eating, or drinking, or sleeping. So when he used his quirk it drained his body and he’s here for 1 or 2 more days.” You said eyes never leaving his.

“That's impossible, he was just with me… he… didn't eat very much.” He trailed off. You hummed at him understanding how he was felling as you missed the signs too.

“Hey, girls I texted Grandma and Grandpa and they said they miss you so much. So while we take care of Yuki how about you guys go see them, yeah? Mr. Yuri is waiting to take you.” You smiled at them. You see a fire rise in Kaori but it goes out quick as Bakugou ruffles her hair.

“Okay then, be good for them and don't cause too much trouble. Mr. Yuri will pick up Kohana, Kaori please explain what's happening to her. And don't worry, we’ll see you real soon.” You said waving the girls out of the room. When they were out of sight you and Bakugou visually deflated.

“Katsuki, how does this keep happening?” You asked him

“What?”

“How do things keep getting worse, first the break up, then the kids being mad at each other, Yuki’s anger at you, and now this.” You cried out.

“The break up was bad to you?” He asked voice cracking.

“Why wouldn't it be, Katsuki I know you don't love me anymore but I…” You trailed off

“Would you just spit it out dumbass! This is why we didn't work out because you never say shit. You just bottle it up and never lean on me or depend on me the way I do to you. You used to say “we're a team” all the time but in the last 2 years you haven't said it once. It was you who fell out of love with me so don't pretend like it was so hard for you.” He yelled at you.

“This is why we don't talk Katsuki, all you wanna do is yell and project all the feelings you bottle up from working so goddamn much. Of course it was hard on me and you would know why if you could drop your ego and talk to me like you can tolerate being around me or love me!” You yelled back at him but before the argument could turn into a big screaming match your sons voice rang out.

“Would you two just stop it…” He said weakly.

“Yuki, im sorry we shouldn't have been yelling even if you were asleep.” Bakugou said caressing his check. At the touch Hiroyuki let out the tears he’s been holding in.

“Its us isn't it?” He paused to look at you. “Me and my sisters… You had Kaori and me pretty young and you didn't really get to be young. You had all of us before you really got to live together just the two of you.. And Uncle Izuku and Auntie Urakara's relationship is doing fine even though they started to date around the same time as you, difference is they just started having kids like 4 years ago… Im 12 and Kaori is 13. So its us isnt?…” He said curling into himself.

“Kid, I'm not gonna lie to you, having you and Kaori at the ages we did was a nightmare. We were barely out of school, we lived with my parents for a while cause we didn't have jobs or a place of our own and even we did get one it was a shitty hole in the wall place but even at the young age of 19 we pulled our shit together and made it work so when you came a year later we were a lot more prepared. Yes we did miss out on a lot of things people our age did but we had you and Kaori and that was so much better than party’s and hangovers. Then we decided to have Kohana, Yoko, and Saiyuri and you all make us so happy. You all have nothing, not a damn thing to do with what's going on between me and y/n. If we ever made you feel like you did we didn't mean to. We love you so much and I am so sorry if we ever made it seem like it was your fault.” Bakugou said, eyes boring into Hiroyuki’s. Hiroyuki looked at you and you nodded to show you agreed with Bakugou.

“Don't ever forget how much we love you, okay? Now you should eat, we’ll get you anything you want.” You said wiping your tears with a smile.

“If it's not too much trouble, I want you and dad’s spicy pork curry and you guys should take some to the girls.” He said drowsily.

“But in order to make that we both would have to leave since it's a meal we make together… we couldn't leave you here alone.” You said mostly to yourself before any could say anything else a new voice was heard entering the room.

“You guys go talk and make him some food, ill stay with him. I didn't watch you guys terribly flirt and kiss everywhere just for it to end over some miscommunications.” Aizawa said as he took the seat next to Hiroyuki. Aizawa had remained close with a lot of students from 1A, becoming like a second dad but he had been extra close with you and Bakugou. When Kaori came into the equation he was like a nanny to her and it only increased when Hiroyuki was born, the two having a really strong bond so neither you or Bakugou was shocked he showed up.

“Okay, then old man. Watch my kid.” Bakugou said, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. You almost forgot what his calloused hand felt like. He drug you to his car and the car ride was mostly silent. The talking began when you began to cook in the house you used to share.

“Do you love me?” You asked as you cut pork

“Yes, I love you. I never stopped, I am in love with you y/n. Today I love you more than yesterday but less than tomorrow.” He said slicing onions.

“Then why did you say that, say that you didn't love me.”

“Because I could see it, you don't look at me the same. We don't talk the way we used to. I don't want to string you along and make you hate being with me, because I love you more than life itself. And I was scared that one day you would wake up and you wouldn't need me and realize how easy it would be to leave me. That it would be my fault we ended because I was so focused on me I didn't see your pain. Scared that I would wake up and gaze into your eyes and find no love or joy in them. So I decided to let you go… I was thinking we just needed a break but you suggested a divorce and I agreed because I would do anything to make sure you keep that beautiful smile of yours. Even if you weren't smiling at me anymore… do you..” He said calmly, growing more emotional with each word.

“Yea, I never ever stopped. I was just tired, I am tired. But I want nothing more than for us to work… we can get through this, can't we?” You asked cautiously.

“Of course we can, we are Bakugous, we can do whatever the hell we want. And it will be different this time, we’ll talk about things and communicate better, I swear. I aint seeing a shrink though.” He said flicking water at you to make his last point more effective.

“Yes we are.” You giggled at him.

“No we aren't, you shitty dumbass. We don't need help, I can talk about my feelings without some dumb wanna be life coach.” He yelled as he began to wash the rice.

“Well we don't have to but I guess that means Zuku and Urakara have a better relationship than us since they go to counseling…” you trailed off with a shrug.

“Oh fuck you!” He roared at you, you giggled knowing he would now go. This was the most normal you felt in months, the happiest for sure. Just maybe things would be okay, and who were you kidding you could never fall out of love with the spiky haired explosion boy no matter what he did. It was toxic in a way but you could unpack that in the therapy sessions you were gonna force him to attend.

#bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou x reader #bnha bakugou #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katsuki #mha x y/n #mha x reader #bnha imagines #bnha bakugo katsuki #bnha bakugo x reader #domestic fluff #bakugou angst #angst

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messagestoateez · 4 years

Text

Packing

Paring: Seonghwa x reader

Genre: fluff

Warnings: slight bit of angst. Pouty Seonghwa really.

Summary: You moved to Korea for college and met your boyfriend, Seonghwa, and his 7 crazy group members, but at the end of the year you have decided to leave and go back to your home country till the next year starts and you can see Seonghwa and your friends again.

A pout formed on his lips at the mention of packing things up. Granted you lived in a small one bedroom apartment rented from the college you went to, and you’d still be able to live in it when the new year started, but you wanted to pack things up and make sure when you came back you could start fresh and decorate your home different for a new atmosphere.

Seonghwa stood in the door frame of the bedroom you two had shared when he didn’t have a busy schedule and could come over, and when you didn’t have much homework from classes. The pout that had stayed on his face for what had seemed like weeks, was especially prominent today. He knew it was your last day in Korea till August and it pained him to let you go. Many hours away and many hours behind would kill him. He needed you to be with him physically, but he understood you miss your family and that you would be gone for only two months.

He sighed and you look over at him with a slight smile.

“My love, I won’t be gone long and we will text and call any chance we get.” You said, walking over to him and pacing your arms around his small waist, pressing your cheek to his chest, hearing his heartbeat speed up with the small act of love he received.

He looked at you and wrapped his arms around your smaller frame and nodded, replying with an almost inaudible “I know.” and then burying his nose in your hair, smelling the scent of strawberry and mint your shampoo and conditioner held. You two stood there for a while before you looked up at him and placed a chaste kiss on his lips, making him smile and a red hue appear on his cheeks.

“Come on lazy bones, we gotta finish packing. Mingi texted me and told me the rest of them would be over soon to help and are bringing food with them.” You said unwrapping yourself from Seonghwas touch and walking over to a half full box of miscellaneous items and moving it from your bed to the floor. Seonghwa walked over to you and helped you move things around and put things in boxes, when suddenly the bell rang.

“I’ll get it.” You said, standing up from your place on the floor, where you were sorting trash and important things into piles. You brushed off your hands, leaving Seonghwa in your almost empty room and getting the door.

You opened the door to 7 hyperactive boys who carried food and drinks, and were shouting your name, pushing past you to come in and hug you with all their strength.

“We come baring food and help.” Hongjoong explained, cringing when he heard one of the boys fall and something glass break.

San and Wooyoung walked in guiltily holding pieces of a broken vase.

“Dumbass here pushed me and I accidentally knocked your vase over.” Wooyoung explained, side-eyeing San, who had a given him the ‘I can’t believe you snitched on me look’.

You sighed and at the same time Seonghwa walked into the living room where you, San, Wooyoung, and Hongjoong were standing and his eyes widened.

“Is that what broke?” He asked.

“Yeah but that’s okay I planned on throwing it out anyways, I don’t use it and it’s just taking up space.” You replied, while taking the broken glass to the kitchen and throwing it away in a random trash bag.

“Hey I got the rest of the room packed, but I found some more papers and set them on the floor in the pile you were going through.” Seonghwa said when he saw you walk back into the living room.

“Okay thank you Hwa.” You offer him a small smile which he returned.

“Why so glum Seonghwa?” Wooyoung asked after seeing the small pout that had been on his face all day.

“Gee I dunno, may it’s the fact that his girlfriend is leaving for two months, genius.” San said in a duh tone, which earned him a slap on the back of the head from Wooyoung.

Yunho, Yeosang, Jongho, and Mingi all came into the living room from the kitchen, Mingi and Yeosang with chicken in their hands.

“Okay so where shall we start?” Yunho asked.

Seonghwa shrugged and looked around spotting unpacked belongings and boxes in a corner of the room.

“There?” He said, asking you more than directing the others.

“There,” You confirmed “but don’t break anything else boys. I’m keeping an eye on you.”

“Aye aye captain.” San and Wooyoung replied.

You and Seonghwa headed back to your room and you sat back down on the ground while Seonghwa started cleaning up and dusting.

Eventually the whole house was packed and cleaned, aside from a few blankets and pillows that were on your bed and couch, and the 9 of you were situated on your couch or on the floor eating and sharing stories for past time.

“We are gonna miss you.” Mingi had said which caused you to frown and pat his head. You two had to be the closest. You guys just seemed to have clicked when Seonghwa introduced you to the rest of the group. Ever since then you two have been best friends.

“I won’t be gone long. Keep Seonghwa company for me, yeah?” You said.

The boys just nodded in reply and went back to conversing.

Eventually it was time to say goodbye to the 7 boys, and the last people out were a sad Mingi being dragged out by melancholy Yunho.

You shut the door behind the two boys, locking it, and turning around to see a teary eyed Seonghwa, making your gaze soften.

You put a hand on his cheek, feeling him lean into the touch, which was enough to make the tears that had been building up over the past week or two, finally spill over.

You removed your hand and let him wrap his arms around you and bury his head in the crook of your neck, letting out silent sobs. You brought your hands up and ran your fingers through his hair, trying to soothe your crying boyfriend.

“Don’t want you to go.” He choked out. The sound of his trembling voice breaking your heart. You guys hadn’t had to be apart yet. You two met after he got off tour, at the cat café you work at. He had gone there often with the rest of his group members and the rest is history.

“Don’t worry bubs, I won’t gone long. It’s only 8 weeks, then I’ll be able to come back to you and see you again, I pinky promise.” You said holding out your pinky, he lifted his head up, the sight of his puffy eyes making your heart clench, and then hooked his pinky with yours. He then set his head back down onto the crook of your neck and enjoyed the feeling of you running your fingers through his brown hair.

“I’m gonna miss you.” He said, nuzzling your shoulder.

“Im gonna miss you too.” You said tearing up a little. To be honest before you met Seonghwa you were ecstatic about going home, but now? You wanted to be there with him, now more than ever. You’ve seen him cry, but being the part of the reason as to why he’s crying breaks your heart even more.

You two stayed like that till you both decided to get ready for bed, you still having to finish packing a carry on.

As you finished brushing your teeth and getting ready for bed, you exited the bathroom, Seonghwa going in behind you and getting himself ready for bed.

You got done with packing your bag, which consisted of your passport, wallet, portable charger, and a few other items, and set it on the floor by your dresser. Then you got your outfit for the next day ready, and headed over to your bed, plugging in your phone.

You got in bed and waited for Seonghwa to finish brushing his teeth, which happened a few moments later.

He crawled in next to you, and brought you to his chest, hugging you, entangling your limbs, and rubbing your back while you drew shapes on his t-shirt clad chest.

“Y/n could you sing for me?” He asked after a few minutes of silence. Even though he was much more talented than you could ever be in your opinion, he insisted that he was in love with your singing after the first time he heard your voice, while you were doing dishes.

“Mhm.” You hum out your answer and break free from his hold to put on some music, as a guide as to what you were singing.

Laying back down, you had reversed the sleeping position, with Seonghwas head on your chest and arms around your mid-section, while your legs were wrapped around his waist running your fingers through his hair again.

As the pianic intro started you prepared your voice to start singing.

Whether near or far

I am always yours

Any change in time

We are young again

Lay us down

We’re in love

Lay us down

We’re in love

Ahh Ahh

In these coming years

Many things will change

But the way I feel

Will the remain the same

Lay us down

We’re in love

Lay us down

We’re in love

Ahh Ahh

As the song had come to an end, Seonghwa’s breathing had evened out, soft snores leaving his mouth, and your eyes started to droop from exhaustion.

It may be 2 months till you would be able to see Seonghwa again, but no matter the distance your love would be okay.

You stopped your movements in Seonghwa’s hair and kissed his forehead, whispering something and closed your eyes.

“Goodnight my moon.”

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jee-ns · 4 years

Text

gone

pairing : rosexfem!reader (ft jennie)

genre : angst

warnings: suicide, cheating

words: 1k

synopsis : you thought you’d move on this time. but no she still lingered in your mind ruining everything. it doesn’t help that jennie has been cheating on you for months now

5 week anniversary of how all this mess happened. sometimes you wondered how much bad luck you had in this world. you must be the most unluckiest person in the world. you thought you’d be happy this time. but as the cycle goes it happened again.

you knew jennie was cheating on you. she’s been tricking you for 2 years now. you first got suspicious when she kept on going on business trips and getting random calls. you were in denial really. without her you don’t know how to handle with all that’s going on. it wasn’t jennie who lived in your mind rent free, it was her. you thought you’ve moved on from her when in reality you haven’t. after you’ve found out about jennie cheating all the memories came back again.

are you really not capable of being loved? what’s so wrong with you that you can’t even make them stay? you always blame her but it wasn’t her fault. it was all yours. your fault that you fell inlove with her. your fault she fell inlove with you. your fault you weren’t there for her. your fault she left. you’ve always thought of it this way. always blaming her for everything. when in reality it was yours. you should’ve stayed that night. you shouldn’t have left her alone in the apartment. it was all your fault that she committed.

when you got back home that night horrified seeing her body. panic started seeping through your veins. tears immediately fell screaming her name hoping she hadn’t left yet. screaming her name for her to just say this was all a joke. screaming for her to say that she’s still here with you. screaming her name until the neighbours heard and called the ambulance.

you were still on your knees. tears dried up on your face. looking into the hard wood floor covered in her dripping blood. they were removing her body from the ceiling fan and rushed past you. you didn’t have the energy anymore. you just wanted to kiss her one last time. hug her one last time. say that you love her one last time. talk about what would happen in the future one last time. you just wanted to see her one last time. but not her in the living room right now. hanging from the ceiling fan. looking so peaceful than she had ever looked before.

you felt happy that she got what she wanted and also betrayed that she left without saying goodbye.

after they finished discarding her body from the ceiling fan. one of the paramedics came to your side and tapped my shoulder. you didn’t look up. you were terrified. you kept your gaze on the wooden floor. she handed a note to to you. you gulped the lump in your throat and opened the folded note and reading the contents.

‘hey y/n !! if you’re seeing this im so sorry.i just couldn’t handle it anymore. it’s so hard. i know i should’ve came to you and talk about it but i don’t want to burden you. i know you’ve been stressed with work lately and i understand. but it just hurts so much and i want you to remember that it isn’t your fault. believe me. everything that leads to this point could never be your fault. in fact, you were the exact opposite. you were the one who’d make me smile whenever i see you. you make me so much more happier when i know im yours and you’re mine. you were the one who lit up my life. you’ve meant so much to me and i know i was in your heart somewhere. please don’t keep grieving upon my death. i don’t like seeing you sad :(. i want you to live your life to the fullest for me.always remember that i love you so much. so so much. you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. i want you to move on and go forward without me holding you back. i want you to live a life without regret. remember i love you!! till we meet next time my love.

your mouth immediately went to your mouth, covering it. the new set of tears started blurring your vision. you feel like punch everything. especially yourself. how could you be so selfish and let this happen? she was your everything. why did you let this happen. everything you did was wrong and led her to where she is now.

you shook yourself awake. you were drenched in sweat. you look to the side, hands searching for the familiar body that had been gone for weeks. and as expected she wasn’t there. jennie was out doing her ‘night shift’ again. you started tearing up remembering her. the stained tears on your cheeks got wetted. you sat on the bed, back against the headboard and knees to your chest. “im so exhausted rosie” you said shakily. “why did you leave” you whispered looking up at the ceiling. “what did i do wrong” you sobbed out.

your hand immediately went to your mouth. trying not to be loud. even though no one else was in the apartment. you could still feel her. you wanted more.

you got up and took your keys and left the house. not even thinking about putting on a jacket. you knew rosie was gonna be upset, but you had to see her now.

after a few minutes driving through the empty roads with blurry vision. you’ve arrived. stroking the rough texture of the stone. smiling. “hey baby” you heard her voice. you whimpered when you felt a hand on your back. you clucthed the grass that had grown over her resting place. you let your head hang down while the tears made it’s way down to your chin and dangled there. “i miss you” the same beautiful voice that you’ve missed so much piped up. you bit your lip to suppress the sob you were about to let out.

“i miss you too” you said looking up at her silhouette of when she left. her neck bloodied and scarred with the rope. hair in a messy bun. all of this with the same smile that never changes when you come to visit.

- admin 🗣

#blackpink #blackpink imagines #blackpink scenarios #rose imagines #rose angst #rosexfemreader #park chaeyoung #rose scenarios #blackpinkxfemreader #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop angst #kpop imagines #jennie #jennie kim #rose blackpink #jennie blackpinnk

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bitchiha · 4 years

Text

✎Teaching The Brat A Lesson (Shikamaru x Reader)

Request: I accidentally deleted the initial ask, but it was something simple and along the lines of public sex with Shikamaru.

Summary: You’ve always acted like a brat when you didn’t get your way, but when you take it too far your boyfriend has to teach you a lesson you’ve somehow forgotten.

Warnings: literally just whore knee nsfw, public sex, degrading?? embarrassement?? Brat taming 10000%, Also very fucking whore knee reader and very long?? Or longer than what I usually write. SEMI PROOFREAD IM SORRY!!

— — —

You had been teasing him all day.

He should have figured it out the minute you stepped outside your apartment in his favourite skirt. The black fabric hugged tight on your body, showing off your perfect legs...

Or maybe he should have realized it when you bent down on the way to the restaurant, adjusting your shoe strap. Your back arched as you bent down, enough to perk your ass up right infront of him, the impossibly short fabric of your skirt riding up enough to give him a little preview of what you were wearing underneath — his favourite panties, the emerald lace ones.

More of your teasing ensued until there was an uncomfortable tent in poor Shikamarus pants, forcing him to take off his jacket and hold it low to his chest in attempt to conceal the ordeal. He refused to let you see just how much you were getting to him, but by the smug look on your face you already knew.

You thought that you won, too. That he was going to go ahead and let you have your way. That he was going to fuck you in the bathroom of the restaurant or just take you home and have his way with you. So when he opened the door to diner with a face of false relaxation, you stomped your foot almost child-like. Give in, give in, give in, lord why won’t be give in! He ignored your stomping and walked into the restaurant, looking as unbothered as usual, asking the hostess casually for a table for two.

He was never one to give in to your bratty tendencies, and today wasn’t going to be any different. But you’ve just been such an entitled thing today — more than usual. First, you didn’t want to go to the restaurant with him, begging to be fucked instead and you whined miserably over the phone when he refused. He wanted to take his girl out for once. You whined at his refusal, a dinner date would have been nice if he hadn’t just come back from a week long mission. You didn’t care for a dinner anymore, you only cared for him being between your legs. Then you hung up with a pout. Shikamaru wanted to kick himself for not fixing your ass right when got to your apartment. Instead, he walked straight into your trap and the only option he had left was to remind you who was in charge, as you clearly seem to have forgotten since the last time...

Letting an annoyed huff slip from your lips, you followed the waiter to your booth. Shikamaru trailed behind you with a hand in his pocket while the other carried his coat infront of him. The restaurant was dimly lit and you had a table in an empty corner of the space. It was a Monday night so there was few people in the restaurant, not that you noticed. You didn’t really care to notice anything but your own aching core. Miserably, you began to step toward the seat opposite your boyfriend, the waiter disappearing after setting the menus down.

You didn’t wait for the waiter to fully leave before you stuck your tongue out at Shikamaru. Causing the waiter to snicker a little. Your boyfriends eyebrow twitched in annoyance, that was the last straw. Before you could make any further move to sit down, he reached for your arm, tugging you harshly away from the seat opposite him. “Nu-uh.” Shikamaru scolded, grabbing you and pulling you down next to him in the booth. You gasped slightly, allowing him drag you down — thighs burning as their bare flesh slid against the sleek wood of the bench, making a loud squeak in protest, “where do you think you’re going?” He asked with a falsely sweet tone, hand still gripping your arm. The burning sensation on your thighs quickly moved towards your core at his sudden change in attitude — you had finally pissed him off enough.

A lick of heat brushed against your earlobe as he leaned closer to you, slipping you out of your thoughts as his voice whispered lowly into your ear. “Such a fucking tease, that’s what you are. Thought you could get away with that?” He reached for your hand, removing the jacket from his lap and placing your warm palm over his previously hidden erection. Your mouth opened slightly at the contact and he pressed your hand down firmly. Your soft hand was so inviting Shikamaru almost moaned right then and there, but this wasn’t about him — not yet at least.

You started to grow impatient as he simply held your hand down, teasing you. Pouting you tried to palm eagerly at his dick, but Shikamaru had a firm grip on your hand, preventing you from moving it. Desperately In need of some release you rubbed your thighs together — trying to relieve some tension from your body. You didn’t care that you were in a public space, and you wanted to sob miserably when your boyfriends hand instantly came down to stop the action with an annoyed scoff. You weren’t listening to him, so he repeated his previously ignored question a bit forcefully. “Think you could get away with all that? With giving me one of these in the middle of the fucking village?” His pressed your hand harder onto his clothed dick, mouth still hovering over your ear.

His tone was gruff, angry and frustratingly familiar. It was tone he used when you had gone too far the last time. You remembered what happened to you — face pressed into the mattress with tears streaming down your cheeks. Shikamaru above you and refusing to let you cum, ignoring your pleas completely... Your hips jerked up into the air a little at the memory, god, you were really in for it now. You hated when he didn’t listen to you and when he punished you like that, you hated not being allowed to cum when you wanted to, but it seemed as though you had willfully skipped right down that road tonight, wihout paying so much as a thought to the consequences.

“S-Shikamaru..” You fumbled to form a coherent sentence, a snide remark, something, anything.. but your brain was fogging up from the memory of the last time you had got him pissed of like this and the only thing you could say was his name — that and incoherent rambles. It made him laugh. For fucks sake, he hadn’t even done anything to you yet and you were already this far gone.

He was enjoying the mess you were making of yourself, he really was. In fact it took every ounce of remaining patience in his body to refrain from giving into you. Seeing you like this, with your hand so willingly around his clothed cock and your face flushed red with need in the middle of goddamn fucking restaurant made him want to take you home and fix you up real nice. But he knew he shouldn’t, if he did you wouldn’t learn your lesson and you’d just pull this stunt again, you needed to learn. Before he could open his mouth again you had managed to form a sentence.

“Please.. please.. I need you to make you feel good! Just take me home — let’s go home, Shika..” You begged, still ignoring his question, turning your head to try and face him, but his mouth was still pressed up against your ear.

You were so persistent, so selfish that you kept squirming and trying to relieve yourself in any way possible. Shikamaru was more than grateful that the restaurant was nearly empty and the waitress still hadnt come by, if they did they would have seen his girlfriend practically grinding herself down on the bench. “God, you’re acting like a fucking bitch in heat, y/n. Wait till we go home.” He snarled, grip tightening on your body.

“Shikamaru,” you whined again, unhappy with his answer you shook your head, “take me to the bathroom and have your way with me..” he scowled, feeling his cock twitch at your desperate begging, you could feel it under your palm. Did you ever shut up?

He shoved your hand off his cock, before grabbing the menu and shoving it at you, waiting for you to pick it up, but you just pouted. “Take it. You’re gonna order for us, you fucking brat.” You whined again at his name for you, but pricked the menu from his hands obediently. You’d been to this restaurant so many times before that you already knew what you wanted. Did he really think making you order the food was going to be a challenge? You quickly moved an arm to make the waiter come over.

You were so confident when you turned to call the waiter, so fucking smug you were gonna get your way that Shikamaru had to stifle a laugh. God were you too horny to remember Shikamaru was your boyfriend, since when did he ever make thing this easy for you, especially after the way you’d been behaving?

“Y/n, y/n.. When would I ever make things this easy for you?” But before you could really understand what those words meant, you felt one of his hands push your ass closer to the edge of the bench resulting in another searing sensation on your thighs. You did your best to ignore him as you successfully grabbed the attention of a waiter, your face twisting in satisfaction, but boy was it going to be short lived.

Just as you were about to turn your head and give Shikamaru a triumphant look, maybe stick your tongue out again too, you felt his hand creep past your skirt and up to your skimpy panties, wasting no time to push the fabric aside and plunge two fingers right into your pussy. The very sudden intrusion made you gasp, choking on air as the waiter finally arrived at the table.

Your boyfriend relished in watching you stumble over your words as you attempted to place your order. Shikamarus fingers concealed beneath the table as he worked at you. At first he kept the pace of his fingers slow — because you were a stuttering mess even at that pace — but as soon as you managed to adjust and say something coherent he would curl them again, sending you into a stuttering once more.

“Sorry,” Shikamaru apologized to the confused waiter with a dramatic sigh, “she’s just so shy. Cant say a single thing to a stranger save her life. It’s cute she wanted to try and order for us though, isn’t it?” He posed the question to no one in particular, despite the waiters presence. Shikamaru was only half paying attention to the sever, his eyes trained on your face as he watched you writhing.

The waiter nodded politely and you felt your face burn more than it already was. It was such a bold faced lie, you were never shy. Especially after how confident you looked calling the waiter over a few minutes ago, it seemed like such a hard thing to believe. And not to mention you were regulars at the damn place, they knew just how obnoxious you could be. God, the whole village knew. But having Shikamarus digits pumping into you right now had made you do a full 180. The show continued a bit longer than Shikamaru expected, afterall he figured you were a smart girl and he knew you would find a way around the issue, but your brain was in shambles as a result of what he was doing to you. So it took you a little longer to wiggle out of his own trap, laying the menu flat and just pointing at what you wanted — however even that proved to be difficult with your vision all blurred.

“Ah,” Shikamaru chided as the waiter scribbled down everything you pointed at (you gave up and just started pointing at random things), “giving up so soon? Well.. At least you tried.” He sighed playfully as the waiter finished and hurried off to place the order, wanting to escape your odd behaviour.

Once the waiter was completely out of sight, Shikamarus pace let up a bit and you managed to say your boyfriends name clearly. Your intent was to have the words come out in an angry tone, but instead they came out as a needy whine. Your hands moving to grip onto your thighs, nails digging in to give you some more desperate relief.

He refused to stop, returning to his ruthless pace, his fingers scissoring now at a pace impossibly faster than before. His thumb moved to rub furiously at your clit. You leaned down as your orgasm began to approach, feeling that familiar heat in the pit of your stomach. Shikamaru could see a little bit of drool about to pool out of your mouth and it only fueled for him to go faster. You were a good girl when it came to staying quiet, but the pleasure you were experiencing now made it quite difficult to stifle your noises. It was too exciting and nerve wracking at the same time. Little whimpers slipped out of your mouth, but they were masked by your hand. To any other table in the restaurant it almost looked like you were just innocently stifling a giggle.

He could feel your walls clenching around his digits and he suddenly halted their movements. You turned your head to look at him in shock, eyes blown with lust and eager for a release. The only thing your muddled brain could manage to do was make a confused noise of protest.

He laughed, savouring the sight of you squirming against the booth. “Did you forget, y/n? This is a punishment not a reward. You’d be stupid to expect I’d let you enjoy yourself.” The pace of his fingers grew tantalizingly slow in comparison to the speed they were ravishing you with seconds before, his thumb retracting from your clit. For a second you thought about just grinding yourself down on them until you came, but you knew that would only make the situation worse for you.

So you did your best to take it, hoping he would quicken the pace again if you were good. God, you were so close to cumming, his fingers were all you could think about, but as quick as they were plunged in was as quick as they left. He pulled them out completely, with a little lewd noise following suit as they left your wetness, leaving you unbearably empty. He brought the digits out discreetly from under the table. Wiping them off on a napkin. The actions stinging your eyes, so much so that tears flowed down your cheeks, why did he stop? and more importantly, why didn’t he lick you off his fingers instead of wipe them off?

He noticed the tears brimming your cheeks and stared at you disapprovingly, “Don’t you dare cry, y/n, you did this to yourself. Wipe your tears away.” You reached up to wipe them off your face with a quiet sob, having no energy left to disobey. He felt the strain of his cock through his pants at the sight of your watery eyes and the sound of the little whines leaving your mouth. He did this to you, he made you this desperate mess. His cock was becoming too much for him to ignore, he grabbed your wrist away from your face and forced it against his dick again, your damp tears mixing with the pre cum of the fabric of his pants.

“Finish what you started and maybe, just maybe I’ll let you cum. Only if you help me like a good girl.” You nodded eagerly with a sniffle as he planted your hand on his clothed bulge and you immediately set to work. You choked a little on your spit as you wiped the corner of your mouth with your other hand, a hiccup leaving your lips as you worked at him. You could see a dark spot on his pants as you began pumping at him faster. He managed to slide himself a bit farther down the table to further disguise your actions as you continued.

He was going to cum fast. Afterall he had been rock hard most of the walk through the village and had been in need of a release since. Not to mention the fact that he had just fingered you in front of a waiter, turning him on even more and of course your brattiness never failed to get him going either.

You watched his face, his head leaning back against the bench as you felt him twitch more and more under your palm. He was close and you continued working at him, the stimulation of the fabric of his clothes helping him over the edge. He came with a loud groan that he covered up with a cough. Your faces reddening as you felt a table turn its attention to you for a split second, before returning to their own conversation. You continued to pump at him, you were being a good girl right? Helping him ride his orgasm out, he would for sure help you cum next, right?

As he finally came down from his high, he shoved your hand off his cock lazily, gathering his composure again. Now that his own need was taken care of it was much easier to punish you. He straightened up, ignoring your expectant gaze as he put his hands on the table casually. Your mouth dropped open at how he was seemingly ignoring your presence.

“Shika..” you whined, grabbing at his arm but he refused to let you move it. You settled for tugging at his sleeve, “Shika what about me?”

“What about you?” He said, his breathing still a little heavy as he was still coming down from his high.

“I was a good girl wasn’t I? You said if I was I could cum.”

“Well I didn’t say I would help you, now did I?” He said with a smirk, turning to watch your already flushed expression intensify. He didn’t mean that did he? Was he going to make you finish on your own?

“Shika- “

“Would you prefer I didnt let you cum at all?” You shook your head slowly, letting your hands trail extremely slowly down to your skirt as you thought over what you were about to do. You didn’t want your fingers, they weren’t nearly as good as his own... maybe if you begged-

“What? Are you shy all of the sudden?” He snickered, impatiently grabbing your hand and guiding it to your core himself, positioning your fingers so as to have your middle and pointer out while the others were bunched into a fist. With his other hand he pushed aside your underwear, allowing his hand to plunge your own into your core.

Once again, you find yourself gasping. You were still dripping from the last intrusion, making it easier for Shikamaru to guide your hand in and out of your sopping pussy. Your high didnt take to long to come either, extremely turned on by the fact that Shikamaru guiding your own fingers to fucking you senseless.

It was your turn to be worried if anyone was around, if the waiter was coming with your food, but no one was paying you two any mind. You were glad for that as Shikamaru was no longer being very discreet with the movements of his arms and your lip was most definitely bleeding from how hard you tried to stifle your noises.

You came with a loud “hrmph,” your teeth crushing brutally on your lip preventing the full noise to come out. You felt your pussy clenching around your fingers as Shikamaru finally let his hand go, leaving yours limp in your hole, lazily riding out your orgasm on your own. You were drained, processing what just happened as you pulled your fingers out carefully. Shikamaru took your hand and wiped it off on a napkin before dropping it, letting your arm fall against the table as you tried to gather yourself.

Before you really could, the smell of food wafted to your nose and Shikamaru smirked, the waiter placing more dishes down than the two of you could possibly eat on your own. You couldnt help but smile in hazy satisfaction at your last little jab at Shikamaru. He hadn’t paid much attention to what you were ordering when he was finger fucking you. He cursed himself for promising you over the phone that he would pay the bill.

#Naruto Shippuden #naruto imagine #naruto headcanons #naruto x reader #shikamaru nara #shikamaru headcanons #shikamaru x reader

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botheredbuck · 3 years

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Callum racing through the hospital to get to and be with Ben headcannons (not the shooting) x

okay so i wrote an entire post reply to this and the realised it barely touched on the actual prompt lmao so yeah i came up with another idea right

so im goin with in canon, so i think it was like two weeks ago just before callum confessed about the whole fitzy situation and he says when ben comes back that he was waiting up till like 2 or something, like ben had gone out to drink his sorrows right

so callum's waiting for him in the flat, in the living room and it's like 2am and everyone else has gone to bed and there's some crappy film he's barely watching on the TV because the only thing that's going through his head is just ben and how much he's fucked up and he just feels awful

and all this shit with fitzy is just starting to creep in and he's lost and he just needs ben, just needs someone to come and hold him but he can't admit it

but right now he's that close that he almost calls ben, tells him to come home and just hold him because callum thinks he's going to just lose it

and then just as he picks his phone up it starts ringing with an unknown number and callum's just got this feeling in his chest

but he picks it up

callum mitchell?

yeah- yeah that's me

and it's someone from walford general saying that he's come up as emergency contact for a ben mitchell and callum's stomach drops

but the woman on the phone tells him that ben's fine, that he's had a fall and that someone needs to come pick him up so callum says he will and hangs up the phone and he's out of the door quicker than seems humanly possible because its all well and good the doctor telling him that ben's fine but there's already this anxiety in his chest that's telling him what if and it's scaring him out of his mind and he can't stop thinking about fitzy in that same hospital

but somehow he gets there in one piece and he's just sprinting across the car park and up to the desk and some woman with a kind face asks him if he needs help because he's already hyperventilating without the running but he just says i need- my husband, i need to find my husband

but she smiles at him kindly, asks for the name and tells him to take a deep breath, and he does as she leads him round the corner to where ben's sat up on the edge of a bed, head in his hands and she explains before they get there it's just some heavy bruising but nothing broken, and that he just needs to keep an eye on things over night and callum nods and thanks her

and ben must hear them walking over because he looks up and their eyes meet and ben looks surprised to see him there and it breaks callum's heart

and so the nurse leaves them alone and says ben's free to go and the second they're alone ben just says can we get out of here? fucking loud and callum realises how overwhelming it must be for ben because ever since the implant hes not been great with loud places so callum doesn't say anything just leads him out and to the car

(idk if they have a car but just go with me okay)

and neither of them say anything until they get back to walford and into the flat and they're both trying to be quiet bc it's like 4am by now but ben says he needs a shower so callum's just sat there in the living room listening to the shower and it's some sort of a reminder that he's not alone in this

so as soon as ben gets out of the shower he just says im sorry. you needed me tonight and i wasn't there and ben just frowns and says think that was you coming to pick me up, yeah? and callum just looks over at him and it's still so tense between them and callum hates it

and the thought of losing ben, however irrational it is, comes back to him because the feeling he'd had when the call had said ben was at the hospital

so he just- spills it all.

tells ben everything about what's happened with fitzy, and talks about how the minute he'd heard that phone call come through he'd just been thinking he was gonna lose ben and he just- starts sobbing on their sofa

and- as much as ben maybe still has some reservations about the last week or so, ben just collapses on the sofa next to him and holds him, and it feels like whatevers been between them is finally starting to melt away, finally

and they kiss after that, and callum kisses every one of bens bruises carefully and apologises over and over again because once he's started he can't seem to stop and ben just tells him there's no need and they're just- them again

(idk if i like this but here ya go anyways, hope u like it and thank u for being patient!!)

#answered asks #ballum #leo writes hcs

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poutyhannie · 4 years

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HERE IS THE FINAL PART :)))) I really didn’t think it’d be this long but i’m happy with how it turned out! thanks for reading

warnings: angst, smut, implied smut, fem!reader, unprotected smexy time, im really bad w warnings guys plz help me

word count: +3k

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

Other than classes and occasional meals, you almost never leave your dorm though you hate it in there. Your roommate just moved in but keeps mostly to herself. The sun has set, casting a murky darkness over the campus. You’ve gotten into the routine of leaving the dorm around 11, the time where your roommate’s breathing evens and snoring starts. Not bothering to grab a sweater, you shuffle out of your dorm in flip-flops and your thin pajamas. It seems that your eyes are always burning and sore. The constant drum of ache courses through your body and as you wander around the relatively empty campus, your mind is blank.

Settling down on a cold bench, you stare up to the small white moon. It seems like you sit there for hours, staring before your eyes begin to prickle with hot, embarrassing tears. They travel down your cheek and get soaked up by your shirt collar.

“What are you doing here?” You whip around, furiously wiping your cheeks dry, though your eyes still water. Under a black hood, you can barely see his face but when he takes a seat next to you he flicks it off. Because you’re only used to Minho’s lust filled eyes, the genuine concern takes you off guard. He tries to lighten your mood by cracking a joke. “Y’know, I was kinda bummed when I woke up alone.” However, this only makes your lips twist and a sob choke out of your body.

His eyes widen, cursing under his breath as he reaches out to rub soothing circles on your back. “Shit, I’m sorry. I guess that’s not helping…What’s wrong, princess?” A bitter taste courses through your mouth and your sore throat painfully swallows. Looking at the ground, you whisper, “I’m fucked up. That’s what’s wrong.”

Minho’s head tilts in concern, “C’mon we’re all human. We all make mistakes and you can bet on your pretty ass that we’re all damn fucked up.” Though his words would cause bile to rise, you find yourself leaning into him, collapsing into his broad chest as tears spring into your eyes once again. “But what are you doing out here this late?” He continues, stroking the back of your head softly, “Just wanted to let it out without an audience?” You nod into his chest, letting your senses fill with his bright scent. “I don’t wanna go back into my dorm.” His voice causes rumblings against your ear, a dangerously enticing feeling. “If you wanna come back to mine, we can. We don’t have to do anything but you can stay if you don’t wanna be here.”

Nothing exists but Minho’s arms around yourself and his scent in your nose.

He lends you a soft hoodie and sweatpants which smell deeply of him. Minho strokes the skin behind your ear as you wrap your arms around him. Minho grips your arms as you kiss along his jaw. Minho tugs at your hair as you pull down his sweats.

You stare up at his ceiling, mindlessly stroking his stomach and wondering how you could loath yourself so much but let yourself have good things. Is it even a good thing? Would he want to touch you if he knew what pain you caused to other people? Minho’s arm tightens around you and he groans softly. “You still up, princess?”

“Yeah, sorry. I usually don’t sleep much.” When he rises, you try to tell him that you’re okay and that he can go back to sleep but he protests, “It’s already 6:30, I usually get up at 7, so I’m fine.” You sit in between his legs, his duvet tangled around you both when he asks you again why you can’t sleep. At this point, you don’t give a damn about your stupid walls and emotional protection because look where they’ve got you. “I fucked up real bad,” you tell him, choosing to look down at his hands. “There was this guy that really liked me but we were just fucking. I thought I just wanted it to be just that, but I didn’t tell him that. I let him believe I wanted something more than that.” Your voice trails off as you look Minho in the eyes.

He stops to think about your words for a moment before saying, “And instead of telling him, you met me at that party.” Worrying at your lip you nod, “When he found out, he got really really mad of course and I said horrible things to him that weren’t true and we…we haven’t talked since,” you shake your head as your filthy heart aches, “I wanted to tell myself that we weren’t emotionally involved with each other.”

Though you half expect Minho to agree, conclude that you are a bitch, but he just nods, a knowing look on his face. “So you do like him.” You suck a breath in, wrestling over a fact that is obviously true. You don’t want to admit it. Why don’t you want to admit it? Maybe because it’s almost like a lock or a seal. Once you confess it, you leave yourself vulnerable to possibilities you can’t control. When you had him, you felt you had him wrapped around your finger. You let him go because your hands wanted to grab an assortment of things and now that he’s slipped out, you just wish that you hadn’t been so selfish.

Despite the sound of a lock shutting you into your feelings you whisper, “Yeah, I really do.”

“Then swallow your pride and tell him that you fucked up,” Minho’s gaze is fierce, “Don’t fucking wait here and hope all your feelings go away because they won’t. If he doesn’t think you’re worth it, then you’ll at least know that what got you into this mess in the first place is resolved. You’d be open with him and you’ll get hurt but,” he throws his hands up, “you’ll have done it.”

You frown, picking at a lint on his covers, “But what if he doesn’t hear me or—”

The exasperated sign from Minho stops you short, “What the fucking hell if he doesn’t hear you, Y/n? He’s got a right to do that but don’t use that as an excuse to not swallow your pride and try to make things right.” You hate how right he is and you hate how you’re missing Jisung but rather than pushing that longing away, you let it lead you. Sunlight streams down on your clothes and you lay Minho’s clothes on his bed quickly, slipping your own on. He gets up, following you out to his doorstep. Somewhere, you find the courage to look him in the eye. “I’m really sorry about this, Minho. Sorry for dragging you into my problems.” Minho shakes his head, tugging you into a hug, “Relationships like this don’t work for everyone. Just tell me how it goes with him and we can work it out from there.” Though you would just drop Minho, block his number and ignore him around campus, you know that you can’t leave a loose end like this so you just nod.

Changbin opens the door to his, Chan’s, and Jisung’s apartment, a scowl rising on his face when he sees you. “What did I fucking tell you, Y/n?” He blocks the doorway with his body and starts closing it when you try to look behind him. “He’s not here so what do you want?”

“I need to apologize! I need to tell him that I was wrong and that—”

“Do you know how much of a fucking mess he’s been these past weeks? Y/n, it’s been almost a month and you haven’t even tried reaching out to him once. Did you even stop to think about him?”

“Every single fucking night! There hasn’t been a single day that I haven’t cried over it!” You respond desperately.

“Oh boo-hoo,” Changbin mocks, “She finally has feeling. Why the hell did you wait till now to say this? Do you like to put the people you care about in misery? What, do you make them realize how much they care about you by destroying their trust?”

By now, tears are streaming down your face at Changbin’s candid, ruthless but truthful words. “I was scared! I didn’t want to tell him because I was terrified of being hurt again.”

“So you fucking shatter his heart.” Changbin growls, his eyes darkening.

“Please, just let me see him. I just need to tell him and then I’ll leave,” you beg desperately, all but wringing your hands. The older boy’s cold voice causes your stomach to sink, “I told you, Y/n. He’s not here.”

Changbin closes the door quickly as a soft voice calls out from inside the apartment. “I-is that Y/n?” You want to run to that voice, to tell him that you know you’re selfish and stupid and fucked up but the stupid door between you stops you from doing that. Muffled words are being exchanged from behind the other side of the door. Changbin tells him that nothing happened and that he needs to go back to sleep. The door opens despite Changbin’s protsts. The boy in the door ways dark eyes are red and puffy. His hair is greasy and his lips are chapped and bleeding.

He’s beautiful.

You don’t dare reach out; you don’t dare touch him. You don’t deserve it. Changbin moves in front of Jisung, jamming a finger in your face. “I’m leaving but this is the first and last fucking chance I’ll give you. Remember what I said to you. I won’t let him get hurt again.”

Now that you are in the position you’ve been wanting to be in: alone in front of Jisung, you regret not preparing what you’re gonna say to him. His eyes are still red and he gazes at you with a broken, longing stare. Swallowing hard and dropping your gaze, you begin, “I’m really fucking sorry, Jisung. I was being selfish and I was wrong for what I did.”

His voice is croaky and raw. “What did you do, though? Do you even know what you did to me, Y/n?” The damn stinging in your eyes drags them down, but you force yourself to look him in the eyes.

“I knew,” the confession makes your heart burn but you continue, “I knew how you felt but—”

“Then why would you do that? Are you really that cruel?” His voice is so soft and it cracks. He shoves his hands into his jogger pockets to hide their tremors from you.

“It’s because I’m a piece of shit, okay? I was scared of opening up to you and wanted you to not feel that way about me because I don’t deserve it!” You don’t know why your voice rises and you wish it wouldn’t. You wish you wouldn’t get worked up over this and just tell him diplomatically but you can’t. “I thought that keeping it only sexual between us would let that happen and I was terrified when I wanted to involve myself with you in a way deeper than that.”

Jisung’s eyes narrow and he scoffs, “So you go fuck another guy. That’s a great solution, Y/n. Really smart move you pulled there,” he steps closer to you, glaring down at you, “Yeah, you’re right. You are a piece of shit cause you were too scared of facing something as normal as feelings.”

Your insides burn and you push down bile as a you can feel a fist tear at your heart but you take a shaky breath in, “I know I don’t deserve it, but is there any way you can accept my apology?” The scoff that Jisung lets out again twists your gut and he places his hands behind his head, turning away from you. His words are slow and measured, “I need to think about it.” You reach out, beginning to say something but abruptly stop, nodding and heading to the door. Pausing to look back at him, his back is still to you. “I’m so sorry, Jisung. I turned into the monster I was hurt by.” Your words have him turning around, eyes confused, but he doesn’t say anything so you close the door softly behind you.

Somehow, you manage to keep the tears at bay down the hall and onto the stairs, though there’s a burning numbness in your fingers.

You’re walking quickly out the stairwell to hide the tears streaming down your face when his voice calls out. Though your eyes scan around the courtyard, your stomach churns. His head is trained down to the brick ground, but he seems to know exactly where is walking: straight towards you. Rushing to meet him in the middle, any other thoughts escape your mind. You don’t even know what he’s gonna say, but a flood of relief rushes through you at seeing him. His eyes regard you thoughtfully and you realize he’s waiting for you to say something.

“W-what are you doing out here?” You stutter out, cheeks flushed and nose cold.

His head tilts and he blinks around your face before responding slowly, “Well this is my apartment,” he lets out a small humorless laugh to fill the empty sound around you guys. Right by his side when he begins walking, you look up at him as he continues, “I’ve made up my mind,” he pauses, meeting your eyes, “actually, I’ve thought a lot about you and me and us for the past month.” You will your heartbeat to slow to a normal pace. “I though that it was wrong of me to be possessive of you but then I realized that you knew how I felt about you,” he chews on his lip, “I feel like we’re both at fault right now.”

“Maybe,” you start, “but that doesn’t make up for what I did to you.”

He stretches his arms out, nodding down at you, “Yeah, I agree but I understand where you’re coming from. I get that trusting people is hard but do you think you can trust me?”

You hold your breath and whisper, “I think I can. Can you forgive me?”

Though Jisung’s eyes wander around you, his voice is steady as he says, “I forgive you if you can trust me.” A breath hitches in your throat and you feel hot tears prickle at your eyes as relief floods your chest.

You collapse into him, wrapping your arms around him and speaking into his hoodie, “I was so scared I’d lose one of the only people I really care for.”

He strokes the back of your head tenderly. “Nah, I want to start back where we left off.”

Sniffing, you gaze up at him, “You do?”

An endearing smile spreads across his face and he nods, “Changbin hyung will take some convincing but I really like you.”

Your chest burns in the best way possible and you don’t feel like you’re worth it but you say it anyways, “I like you too, Jisung.” Satisfied, he leans down to place a firm but tender kiss to your lips. A tear trickles down your cheek as you feel redeemed. Forgiven.

Jisung trails his fingers through your hair and leans back onto his bed covers, you on top of him. Gingerly, your fingers trace the familiar curve of his jawline and you realize how much you missed him. His tongue is slow against yours but his heartbeat is fast against your fingers. As his lips travel over the skin of you neck, you exhale happily, ready to begin with Jisung again the right way. He flips you both over, eyes wide and asking you for permission. You nod and he slips off his hoodie. His slightly cold finger provide a wonderful sensation as he pushes them into you. Slowly thrusting them in and out, Jisung gazes down at you, a smile gracing his features as your soft moans fill his apartment. He curls his fingers in you, twisting and scissoring you in a way no one else could. With your full attention on him, Jisung pulls out his fingers and licks your arousal off them. The sight of his red tongue lapping the juices up makes you instantly wetter. Smirking, Jisung tugs down his pants, leaning down to place wet kisses over your face, neck, and collarbones. His hot mouth on yours, he slowly enters you, letting you adjust before firmly thrusting into you. Its not crazed or wanton like before, but slow and drawn out as he feels the extent of your depths clenching around him and you feel his veins rubbing against your walls. With a slow exhale, Jisung continues, his hands reaching down to grasp yours tightly.

“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you, Y/n,” he breathes.

“I can know, because I’ve missed you more.”

A sly smile comes onto his face and he shakes his head, “Nah, I missed you more, baby.” To cement his words, he reaches a hand down to slowly circle your clit. You arch your back off the ground and let out a deep moan. His lips finds your jaw as his pace quickens. His hair is soft and tangles in your fingers as one hand grips his hair and one his shoulder. Breathless moans escape both of your lips and when he looks down at you in the eye, you unintentionally clench around him. He groans and whispers, “I’m close, baby.”

You nod, moaning as he pleasures your clit and thrusts deep into you. When you tilt your head to the side, Jisung grabs your jaw, staring down at you. “You’re mine, Y/n. All mine.” This pushes you off the edge and you shake as your release washes over you and you feel him coming into you.

Panting, Jisung stays on top of you, admiration in his eyes as he gazes down at you, even as his erection withers inside you. “Say it,” he whispers. Now with no inhibitions, you kiss him, holding his gaze and breathe, “You’re mine, Jisung and I’m yours.”

Jisung cleans you both up and as Jisung holds you tightly, nuzzling his nose in your neck, you realize that your past experiences no longer control your life. You alone are the author of your chapters and Jisung helped you gain that freedom. You run your hands through his hair and hold him close, cherishing him like he’s the world.

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faroutharry · 4 years

Text

You feel, I feel

Hey guys, this is my first Harry writing, sorry if it is really shit, feel free to send me ideas for more writing, im very excited to get into this.

length: 2.7k

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Harry’s new album was coming out in less than a week and he was going crazy thinking about how his fans were going to react. “But baby what if everyone hates it?” Harry pouts at me from his spot on the bed, his eyes still puffy and his voice groggy from just waking up. “They aren’t gonna hate it H, they will love it because it comes from you and your heart” I give him a big smile through the mirror across the room. “Hmmmmp” He flops back onto our bed with a big grunt. “Maybe I would be more confident if you listened it to first…” Harry quietly says as he pokes one eye over the duvet. I spin around quickly looking at him as if he has two heads. “What?” He’s using those little puppy dog eyes and staring up at me with hope. “You really want me to listen to it?”

I can’t even begin to explain how tense I feel about his question, On one hand of course I want to listen to it, because he’s my loving boyfriend and he had already told me that there were certain songs that I had influenced. But on the other hand he had also stressed to me that certain songs have been influenced by “other people”. The second he said “other people” like that I knew exactly what he meant, and as heart breaking as it is to me that he has obviously had previous partners, I knew this day would be coming and as selfish as I am, I have been trying to put off listening to the album in fear that I would ruin it for him. I know I’m nothing compared to his pervious relationships and that’s something I need to work through and definitely not something he needs to worry about. Another reason for me avoiding the album is well, I just love him so much that even hearing him talk about his previous pains gives me pain, I can’t even begin to explain how sad it makes me to think that someone has broken his heart like that. Before we started dating we were amazingly close friends, and I cant even tell how many times I walked into his place to hear his strangled cries from shower or his angry yelling in the kitchen. I just want to cuddle him in a big blanket and shelter him from the worry and hurt.

“Of course I want you to listen to it, your opinion is one of the only ones I truly care about baby” He slowly rises from the bed and walks his way over to me, wrapping his hands around my waist and staring at me in the mirror. I try my absolute best to seem as excited as I can be, because I am excited, well for most of the songs. “I would be honoured to hear your album H” I wriggle around in his arms and kiss his lips briefly before hiding my face in his neck. I can hear his heart start beating faster as he says “Really? Thank you so much petal, I can go and get my laptop and show you now if you’re free?” With a pleading look on his face how could I possibly say no? “Yeah sounds good bub”. He runs off without another word into his office.

I try to prepare myself by focusing on my breathing and counting to 10 slowly. By the time I’m done Harry is racing back into the room with his laptop secured in his arms. He jumps onto the bed and pats the spot next to him. I carefully walk back over to my side of the bed and hesitantly get back under the covers, if I’m going to do this I’m gonna be as comfy as possible on the outside, because my insides are going to be a wreck. “You ready baby?” H looks over at me with his childlike grin and I shake my head yes “Just don’t interrupt though, I wanna hear it the whole way through”. As the intro to Golden starts I breathe in quietly and silently pray it’s not about someone else. Harry stares at me intently as I try not to focus on him right now. I close my eyes and lie down to try to distract him from my anxieties. As Golden ends and Watermelon Sugar starts I start to calm down and juts enjoy his heavenly voice as I know the next 3 songs are ones I have already heard and, from what I think I know, they aren’t based on any ex’s of his. But then Cherry starts…

This is what I was worried about. As soon as I hear her voice I know I’m screwed. My heart is going crazy in my chest and I struggle to keep my tears to myself. I slowly look over to Harry and see that he is staring up at the ceiling and I am grateful he’s not looking at me right now, cause I know he would stop the music and ask me what is wrong. So I suck it up and try to listen to the song over my rapid heartbeat. Hearing him say he misses certain things about his ex is never easy and I swallow down my insecurities and try to focus on the guitars or backing vocals, so I don’t have to listen to the words. Just when I think the gut wrenching song is over, I let out a small sigh of relief. But then her voice fills my ears again, her gorgeous accent and girly laugh flow through me like an alarm, only I can’t wake up from this nightmare because it’s happening in real life.

I look to the computer screen as I now see Harry has also closed his eyes next to me, and see the next song if Falling. If the song title is anything to go by, I think I’m in for a sad time. Harry’s phenomenal vocals distract me long enough to not really listen to the words, but I get the gist and it makes me sink further into my miserable state. I can hear Harry slightly sniffling and so I take that as an okay to silently cry myself. I get through the rest of the songs relatively easy, my heart gets a break during Sunflower Vol.6 and Treat People With Kindness, and right when I think it’s over, Fine Line comes on.

As I’m listening I slowly start to piece things together and realise that, hopefully, this one is about us. Our relationship had a rough start with mixed communication and missed opportunities, but I very clearly remember rocking him in my arms as his drunken tears covered my shoulder, and I repeated the words “We’ll be alright” until he fell asleep in my arms on his kitchen floor. I can’t help the tears flowing down my face anymore and Harry finally notices as I feel his arms pull me onto his chest and he kisses my forehead. As the song fades out I sniffle back my tears and turn to shove my arms around him in a giant bear hug. I push all my feelings aside and look him dead in the eyes as I say the one sentence I know he really wants to hear. “I am so proud of you H”

The next week Harry was super busy leading up to the release of Fine Line and, as I promised him, everyone loved it. His fans were going crazy about it and about a certain song as well, clearly I was not the only one shocked to hear her voice on Cherry. The fans quickly figured out what it translated to in English and though it was a pretty meaningless conversation it still kind of hurt that Harry kept it.

Being the loving supportive girlfriend that I was obviously I played the album around the house, mostly when Harry wasn’t around so that I could skip a few songs to save me the heart ache. But a certain night, when Harry wasn’t due home till late, I was washing the dishes whilst singing to Lights Up and I didn’t hear Harry sneak in the front door. He stood by the doorframe behind me so I couldn’t see the smug look on his face as he watches me sing and dance slightly to his song. When I heard that the song was ending I spoke up. “Alexa, skip 2 songs”. I am a little grateful that I didn’t realise Harry was there cause the look on his face would have shattered me. He slowly turns back to the door with a dejected look on his face. He re opens the front door and shuts it louder in hopes that I will hear it. I turn around with a smile on my face and call out to him. “Hey baby, I’m in the kitchen”. He walks into my line of vision and I can see he looks upset. “You okay H? Bad day?” He shrugs slightly at my question and he quietly states, “Yeah it was alright, I’ll just be in the shower”. His usual loving self is nowhere to be seen and I start to worry. He should be happy, his album is amazing and all his fans love it. So I hurried to dry my hands and race up the stairs after him.

I can hear the shower already running so I open the bathroom door quietly and stick my head in. “H baby are you alright?” I can hear him whimper gently and I waste no time in opening the shower curtain and hopping into the shower fully clothed to hold him. When I do I see he didn’t manage to get his clothes off either and it makes me seriously start to panic because Harry was always the stable one holding me usually. He cries are like daggers to my heart as I plead with him to tell me what’s wrong. “H are you alright? Are you hurt? What’s happened?” He just sobs louder and can’t even get his words out. So I just hold him tightly and slowly try to get him out of his clothes while he cries in my arms. Once I finally get both our clothes off I quickly reached down to plug the bathtub so we can have a bath, because all the crying and water is making it hard for H to breathe.

Once the tub is full, I slowly move Harry down into the water, situating him in from of me so I can wrap him in a giant bear hug. After a while his crying subsides and I ask him again quietly “Harry you wanna talk about it now?” My quiet voice startles him and he slowly lets out a big sigh as he whispers, “I knew this would happen” His voice sounds so broken I just want to take all his pain away. “Baby what are you talking about? What happened?” He gently turns around in my arms so he is facing me. “Cherry” he huffs dejectedly, my breath catches in my throat and I look at him confused. “I know I should of warned you about her being on the song and I swear I was going to I just didn’t know what to say and I know how awful it must have been to hear me sing about her and then hear her at the end and I even…” His rambling is making me confused and he’s starting to speak faster and I can barely understand him towards the end. “H” I try to cut in on his outburst but he can’t even focus on me as I see him start to crumble again. “Harry… Harry!!!” I grab ahold of his gesturing hands and get him to look at me. “It’s fine baby, it was a shock but it’s fine I promise you, it’s a great song”. He looks at me like he knows I’m lying and says, “You don’t mean that” I go to open my mouth to rebut him but I can’t get any words out. “I heard you skip my songs when you were in the kitchen before…” The look on his face makes me hate myself; I quickly shake my head as I feel tears start to escape from my eyes. “Baby I only skip those songs because it makes my heart hurt to feel you sing with such emotion and pain. I physically can’t listen to you sing about your heartbreak because it breaks mine right back. I can’t even explain to you how mad and upset it makes me that she ever made you feel that way and I don’t ever want you, or me for that matter, to ever feel that way again because my heart can’t take it.” He slowly looks up from the bubbles in the bath to meet my tear filled eyes. “I just love you so much H that I don’t want to ever hear or see you in pain, I swear I think it’s a great song, almost too good, because it makes me feel so emotional” Before I can continue Harry cuts me off with a kiss so deep I cant even think straight. He slowly leans back and pulls me on top of him so im straddling his hips. His hands move around my waist as I grab hold of his neck. I can feel all our love in this kiss and even though both of our tears and some snot is mixed in, it’s the best kiss we have ever shared.

As I pull away, I look into Harry’s eyes and I see his smile start to come back as he kisses my forehead before I place my head onto his chest. And for that moment we just sit there in a comfortable silence and bask in out love. After a while I slowly pull myself up out of bath and with my pruned fingers I grab ahold of Harry and help him out of the tub too. We both dry off and get each other into our pyjamas. As we both get in bed we lie facing each other and I give him a small nose kiss as I say “ H, I so sorry I didn’t tell you about your song, I didn’t wanna upset you about it because its only my opinion, not every ones” Harry pulls me into his chest as he rests his head on top of mine. “I know baby it’s okay, I just love you so much that I couldn’t stand you hating my songs, I know it sounds stupid but I just adore you and your opinion is so important to me, and I know I should of told you about her but I knew it would make you upset and I promised myself I would never do that” I can feel his tears falling onto my head and I lift mine up to look at him. “I just can’t live without you petal and I couldn’t stand to see you mad at me, I’m so sorry” I kiss his tears away and then plant one on his lips before I say “I love you too much H, you could never say or do anything that would make me want to leave, and I know how pathetic that sounds but I just think you’re my soul mate and I couldn’t live without you either baby” His eyes spew more tears, this time of happiness and his grin spreads to his cute little dimples. “Just incase you were wondering Adore You and Sunflower are about you, about how happy you make me and how you make me feel.” I smile up at him with a shocked look on my face; a cheeky grin spreads across my face as I giggle to him “What? You mean Watermelon Sugar isn’t about me?” Hearing his infectious laugh warms my heart and he starts tickling my sides. “Of course its about you petal, im addicted to your taste you know that” And with that he starts sucking on my neck making me laugh as his prickly bread tickles me. I may never be able to go back in time and un-break Harry’s heart, but I can always ensure it doesn’t happen again.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING THIS!!! LOVE YOU ALL VERY MUCH, IF YOU COULD PLEASE SHARE THIS OR LIKE IT, IT WOULD MEAN ALOT TO ME!!!! Don’t forget to send me ideas pleaseeeeee!! :)

#harry styles imagines #Harry Styles #harry styles writing #harry styles series #harry styles story #one direction #one direction imagines #one direction stories #fine line #imagines #niall horan imagines #fanfic #fanfiction #harry edward styles #love #songs #watermelon sugar #cherry #falling

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