#im gonna actually explode lads it's gonna happen
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modmad · 1 year ago
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today's 'technology is in such a hell state now that I genuinely feel compelled to scream about it daily' moment was my trying to print and scan a document, with my printer/scanner (which, I must have you note, despite my pleading with the seller did not come with usb wire option available, and none of the others did).
Predictably, having been used on the day of purchase and not since, the printer did not work despite being less than 6 months old. Searching for why this could be led me down a rabbit hole that eventually resolved into how the print cartridges for this model just dry out and clog up if you don't use them every single week. you know. what a normal thing to happen. but don't worry! just soak the bottom in a shallow bath of warm water for 30 minutes dry it off and reinstall it that'll make it work
8)
you what.
Anyway, it did work. I print the test sheet, boom, what should have worked before at least worked now. And there was Much Rejoicing.
alas. alas. how shortly lived it was.
Now I naturally move on to print the document, sign it, and scan the newly signed document. The document from my pc. With this printer/scanner which is sitting on a desk directly NEXT TO my pc.
Which. will not. connect to my pc.
I plead. I bargain. I follow the wizard twice, thrice, but it is a cruel wizard, a tormenter from the nether world. "Type in the IP address!" He taunts me, cackling maniacally as I do, weeping over my staggering fingers attempting to puzzle the code out of the 1 inch touch screen, numbers and dots jazzing into nonsense in my field of vision as I loose all comprehension of what the symbols mean. The printer cannot be found. The printer does not Exist. The printer, at this moment, the sole focus of my gaze, decides it is bored and goes to sleep, therefore ending the whole attempt of communicating with it just as the 938678th loading bar had reached its zenith and I, ever the hapless Sisyphus, watch my dignity flatten into a pancake of wordless, stark-eyed bewilderment verging on hysteria as my boulder crashes back down the hill as the wizard begins to drag me back to the beginning of his never ending Labrynth, to be eaten by and become the ouroboros yet again but no! I will not enter back! I shall bite down, break my scales, and end this cycle of tyrannous misery!
anyway that's why I ended up taking a shitty photo with my phone's camera and I'm doctoring it in CSPaint to look like I scanned it with the SCANNER THAT I AM ABOUT TO THROW OUT OF A SECOND STORY WINDOW
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mde1011 · 3 years ago
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when i got into the dsmp i started a note and wrote down any quotes or moments i thought were funny, and im bored at 3 am so enjoy some of them
how is being arrested real? just walk away!!!”
⁃ “once an american always an american. go...go protests masks...or something”
⁃ “...yEAH BUT DID YOU HAVE WAP” “what’s...whats wap?” “...WORSHIP AND PRAYER”
⁃ “HOW DO YOU LIKE POLITICS MOTHERFUCKER”
⁃ “i’m naked” “...no you’re not” “i can be...”
⁃ “uhhhh i’m in a high stress situation....i deal with these poorly”
⁃ “i should go first i’m naked”
⁃ “yEAHHHH WE KILLED AN OLD MAN WITH HEART PROBLEMS”
⁃ “what are you going to do?” “i...have no idea i think i’m gonna start out by punching a tree”
⁃ “tOmmy...did i just hear you say shit ass looking mofo?”
⁃ “i aM gOinG to gEt nAkeD to iNtiMidAtE HiM”
- “...i want freedom !” “you want BALLS.”
⁃ “...down the line. yeah that’s where we discover the art of cannibalism” “oh it’s an art?” “it’s an art”
⁃ “oh there’s some logs here. wonder what they’re saying to me. uh huh. uh huh. oh yeah that’s very racist” “tommy you gotta burn those logs.” “burn ‘em before they spread their racism to other logs”
⁃ “are you pooing?” “*whisper* i’m charging up-““ “he’s ejaculating on the tent.” “he’s WHAT?”
⁃ “he’s sPEEDING. LOOK HOW FAST HES GOING” “i’ve taken so many drugs. someone tell badboyhalo”
⁃ “we should make a pact. and that pact is, uh, we make a book...and in that book...we declare that saying ‘muffin’ is a, is a slur”
⁃ “i was thinking what if one day your bladder just,,,,stopped working.....AGGGFFFFF i was tHINKING ABOUT THAT THE OTHER DAY IVE GOT TO PREPARE IVE GOT YO PREPARE thisiswhydiapersaintthatbad”
⁃ <sapnap> i think i was ordered to um
<tommyinnit> boobed
<sapnap> kill you
<tommyinnit> boobs
<sapnap> if this happens
<tommyinnit> think about boobs man
<sapnap> tsk tsk tommy
<tommyinnit> iM DISGRUNTLED
⁃ “why is this deadman so good at making drugs”
⁃ “i just learnt that a girl hero is called a heroine and it freaked me out”
⁃ “memento memento me-“ “that’s actually the worst word i know so you can’t keep saying that” “oh, really.....? have you ever heard the term ‘racist’?”
⁃ “the person who invented the phrase ‘be yourself’ hadn’t met you!”
⁃ “you seem like the type of guy whose dad would throw him overboard as a joke but he would just drown”
⁃ “shout out to dream for twerking!”
⁃ “let’s talk......let’s talk about sex” “wonderful. what do you think about sex, lazarbeam?” “i ain’t saying SHIT in front of a sixteen year old”
⁃ “what the- i think i’m seeing things” “....tommy i told you not to drink the sea water” “well i DID drink the sea water because it TOLD ME TO”
⁃ “it’s like the movie when that guy gets stranded on an island and has sex with a coconut” “whAT?? dream- dream, you vastly misinterpreted this” “it one hundred percent does”
⁃ “oh mastICATE.....isn’t that when a fish turns inside out?”
⁃ “what are some bad words YOU know, clay?” “i don’t-“ “what about ‘terrorist’?”
⁃ “my mind has to be on the same frequency as jesus when he walked on water”
⁃ “you wanna know why i was late?” “no i really do-“ “i was having a MASSIVE poo. really just a HUGE poo”
⁃ “jUST CUZ YOU TALK ABOUT POO ONCE AND THEN YOU SEE A BIG GREEN BASTARD AMD YOUR LIFE IS FLASHING BEFORE YOUR EYES AND THEN YOU CANT REMEMBER- YOU CANT REMEMBER IF IT WAS YESTERDAY OR TOMORROW YOU HURT THAT WOMAN”
⁃ “i love america. mmmmm patriotism
⁃ “LIFE IS NOT A HAPPY SONG KERMIT THE FROG”
⁃ “please stop taking the cock”
⁃ “two four six eight who do we appreciate? not the government let’s gooooooo”
⁃ “oooo look at the dogs😍” “wHAAAAAT. WHAT. THERES ACTUALLY LIKE. A MILLION DOGS HERE. WHAT THE HELL.”
⁃ “yeahhhhh bitch i stab- i don’t stab women-“ “woooooooah tommy you stab women?” “heyyyy sapnap”
⁃ “do you know what happens whne you reach the top of the ladder? there’s only one place to go.” “.....side to side😨” “down.” “...i really thought you were gonna say side to side🥺”
⁃ “one last time.” “just like in hamilton😓”
⁃ “you don’t know how many times i’ve mistaken trees for hot women”
⁃ “ i don’t feel better i just destroyed penis”
⁃ “i’ve never seen a snail with bad morals”
⁃ “awwwwwwww😢 i’m doin’ drugs🤧 just like the good ol’ days😓” “.....define the ‘good old days’” “back when i did drugs”
⁃ “have you ever fought a baby? i have and it was trivially easy to defeat, phil.”
⁃ “the only other i egg i know about was the one i learnt about in school....not allowed to say which one....”
⁃ “did you know one of my new years resolutions is to be more like 2010 justin bieber?”
⁃ “apparently cats don’t lay eggs”
⁃ “thinking about trees- if i saw a tree with a beard mmmmmm...holy shit id hit it”
⁃ “we’re in hell dude. science doesn’t matter here”
⁃ “i cant die i cant die i’m GOD”
⁃ “hey pig your letter is the same as pussy, hmm?”
⁃ “are we cool are we COOL guys? CRYSTAL COOL like CRYSTAL METH”
⁃ “he- he’s crying because - because i killed his mother isn’t that right? mother dearest mother deadest mother gonest”
⁃ “bro ive been drinking since i was six and let me tell you...it’s not good to be drinking that young. led to some poor life decisions when i was 8” “what did you do” “i cant say” “...who did you hurt” “....only myself”
⁃ “je suis” “ay i know what that mean you prick” “what does it mean” “it means you’re racist dickhead”
⁃ “i’d never poo in the presence of a women- which is why i’m scared to get a girlfriend i think i’d just explode”
⁃ “biff tannen is one of my idols”
⁃ “black widow died and i thought ‘wow it should’ve been the man’ because he’s a man”
⁃ “there’s a character called captain america and i think he’s stupid”
⁃ “i’m a GOOD LAD i’ve got GOOD MORALS and if i’ve DONE SOMETHING WRONG it WASNT MY FAULT I JUST GOT A LITTLE EXCITED”
⁃ “sam....what’s the longest you’ve ever wiped your arse? for me it’s 48 minutes”
⁃ “why are you standing in the shitter?” “....that’s a SINK” “uhhh welllll” “hAVE YOU SHAT IN THE SINK?????”
⁃ “you’re like a living ghost” “...i think that’s called a human, tubbo”
⁃ “maybe i accidentally kill ranboo and we just never see him again *laughs* ay? and then i go ‘april foooools!!!’ and then i kill their child. i kill him”
⁃ “you built a penis” “it’s a PENIS OF SAFETY”
⁃ “i saw the penis of safety and i pressed mouse button four my friend”
⁃ “the penis on the other side of the river is larger” “ive heard that before....”
⁃ “you’ve turned the penis into a wall” “a wall of safety is better than a penis of safety” “i think the penis was better”
⁃ “if you wanna make a penis i know where we can make a penis and i know how big we can make it”
⁃ “i don’t conceptualize death but i think i just saw it!”
⁃ “yeah i- yeah i know i’m- my first impression on eret was making him read a shrek fan fiction so- i’m not one for first impressions”
⁃ “i-i’m scared for him- i’m scared OF him. yknow the first thing he did when he saw me was imMEDIATELY strip down then jump off then immediately die?”
⁃ “where are you?” “getting stabbed, one second”
⁃ “you’ve seen the joker?” “yea-“ “i resonate a lot with that man” “...oH. oh. that’s- that’s not-“
⁃ “he bURNT DOWN MY HOUSE” “out of LOVE”
⁃ “ohhhh my god stop making me play with the neighbor kid” “o-okay if you don’t go play with him i’m kicking you out of the house-“ “wHAT THE FUCK???”
⁃ “there’s a STRIP CLUB” “oh yeah for wood!” “are you into strippers?” “i mean all it does is make the wood look different so....yeah it doesn’t really do much”
⁃ “no no we have categories, we have the poo-saster- you might have to take a shower after-“ “no, no i’m gonna stop you right there”
⁃ “as i was saying you can have a 1-to-3 wiper, that’s an A-tier poo, my friend”
⁃ “i want you to eat your sock”
⁃ “you know i’m a child- i’m a minor” “sO AM I DICKHEAD”
⁃ “everyone is calling you dresus” “yeah i am”
⁃ “ayyyy ayyyy los DROGAS LOS DROGAS” “no no big q- she’s thirteen- how does this happen with every 13 year old girl you meet?”
⁃ “my poo has muscles like i do”
⁃ “i cant hear the words among us without crying they’ll say there are aliens among us and in the back youll just hear me *choking noises*”
⁃ “tubbo...tubbo is like...tubbo is like mary” “.....did you just call me the Virgin Mary?”
⁃ “i’m just saying, have you ever seen me and jesus in the same room?”
⁃ “do you smoke sam” “all the time”
⁃ “i thought you were talking about the- the speeeeed drug”
⁃ “have you ever sold drugs to kids sam?” “......no”
⁃ “we can’t let the girlboss rule because she will gatekeepe my feelings” “that would not be good”
⁃ “THEY DIDNT INVITE ME TO KILL ME???? NOW I HAVE FOMO”
⁃ “you have obviously taken part in scientology-“ “i have not-“ “you’ve donated to tom cruises cult shit”
⁃ “....am i worse than david dobrik?” “are- are we worse than david dobrik?” “oh- oh god”
⁃ “he has broke one of the rules of the hit best seller ‘the bible’- this kind of looks like a cock”
⁃ “well i’ve moved now, KING”
⁃ “what is an angsty teen and am i one? because when i USED to hang out with my friends they use the word angst a lot”
⁃ “yeah yeah yeah i bench”
⁃ “sam i think i’m angsty i think i’m an angsty tik tok teen looking for a community to help me out”
⁃ “i don’t think you’ve followed the train of logic all the way-“ “there’s a TRAIN INVOLVED????????”
⁃ “i’m like the orange fucker from that animated rom com”
⁃ “i’m under the influence of big cock”
⁃ “it’s meeee big cock man”
⁃ “i cant look away” “sam please use your twitter alt for this” “he’s horny on maaaainnnnn” “and what’s wrong with that?” “.......”
⁃ “you’re a FUCKING IDIOT” “IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT, BIG COCK”
⁃ “i’m gonna call you ‘cockity’ big cock” “sHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP-“
⁃ “STOP LOOKING AT IT” “ITS SO VIBRANT”
⁃ “at least this guy doesn’t have a cock-“ “itS NOT A COCK” “horny on main jesus-“
⁃ “is that a cock” “SHUT THE FUCK UP”
⁃ “.....i wanna see the inside of it again do a split”
⁃ “okay sam-“ “tommy that guy wants your cock-“ “no- no he doesn’t sam”
⁃ “sam, sam and i need you to hear this....dont. act. up.” “i don’t act up-“ “you were acting up-“ “i-“ “you were caught in 8k.” “but- but we both agree it’s not a tie-“
⁃ “please don’t tell me to kill cockity i am overwhelmed”
⁃ “why is there an anus in my tie?”
⁃ “what are the legal implications of this?” “...i mean besides hell you’re good”
⁃ “whatre the legal implications?” “i mean usually that’s a no-no but today, today it’s fine” “yeahhh lets go murder his family”
⁃ “i’d be an antivax landlord”
⁃ “jesus never does drugs” “well- well you turned water into wine king and wine is alcohol”
⁃ “can you put on pants i can’t- i cant stop looking at it- sorry tommy i know you said-“ “yeah sam i know you tried-“
⁃ “you know i fuck with satan”
⁃ “i’m sorry jesus lucifer is just such a good man-“ “oh you- hold me BACK FROM THIS FUCKER HOLD ME BACK ILL SEND HIM TO HELL YOU LIKE HELL-“
⁃ “are you jesus or just a man who grew a beard and put on a suit?”
⁃ “even the guy with his cock out is telling you to stop-“ “oh jesus, and i mean jesus-“ “shUT THE FUCK UP MAN”
⁃ “the best best way to slander him is to stop his offspring; we need to kick him the balls.....no? not a good....? alright us four each take a ball-“
⁃ “......why did jesus give him four scrotums man🙁🙁”
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amazingphilza · 4 years ago
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snapchat :: c!tommy x reader
fluff / angst , platonic , gender neutral ! first request whoop whoop :D [check pinned for more info on requests]
synopsis: ‘what’s so bad about adding every person on snapchat?’ tommy thought. unknowingly, with all the other people he begins talking to during exile, one ends up being you; tubbo’s younger sibling. that is until you both visit tommy in logstedshire.
cw: i purposely misspell a few words for the texting part, i hope it’s still readable for y’all! and i haven’t actually used snapchat in years so let’s pretend i know what i’m doing :)
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tommy smiled at his brand new phone
first thing he does? install snapchat and reddit
if he couldn’t talk to his best friends face to face anymore, at least he had people online to talk to, right?
tommy hoped from all his possessions dream would destroy, he could at least keep a phone
without much thought, tommy opened snapchat and began adding every account and messaging them the same obnoxious message
BE MY FRIEND . MESSAGE BACK NOW.
most people chose ignore tommy, not having a clue why he was messaging them
but as for you, when you had the notification that someone added you on snapchat and started aggressively messaging you, it made you curious
you read their user
“wife haver”?? huh???
instead of immediately blocking the person, you replied back
what?
not even less than a second later you get a reply back
OH MY GOD FINALLY SOMEONE
IM DYING
without context, you were more than confused
genuinely dying is very alarming but you shouldn’t text a random stranger your last words
huh?
THE GREEN BASTARD TOOK EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME
YOURE ALL I HAVE LEFT
plwase helo
Help
where did tou go
Ohm hgod
hHello?
NOOOO NOT YOU TOO
PLEASR
you laughed at the person’s desperation and ignored the messages
if the stranger wasn’t going introduce themselves, you wouldn’t either
however, after a while you realized you had over 100 snapchat notifications within an hour of trying to ignore the person
however it was just jumbled up words and useless spam, nothing important
as if the stranger would said anything important to your concern anyway
do you ever shut up??
fuck you
a normal person wouldve taken offense by these messages but you found them quite amusing
it wasn’t like you had anything else better to do
and this acceptance was the start of your odd friendship with the stranger
you were still on edge because you had no idea who they were and their intentions but the anonymity was mutual nonetheless
if the desperate spamming “wife haver” isn’t going to formally tell you who they actually were, you weren’t going to risk exposing yourself first
but in the past few weeks, you and the person had normal conversations apart from the first day they messaged you
well as normal as you could’ve expected from someone named “wife haver”
they were the first to send an actual snap as well
that was when you found out the “wife haver” was an obnoxious boy that looked around your age, maybe a slightly older
he had sent you a photo of him holding a thumbs up and trying to smile when he was clearly upset
just got all my stuff exploded again, feeling good
you noticed his messy blonde hair and tattered clothes
what the hell happened to this guy?
part of you was confused, and the other was concerned
u good bro??
well
i don’t have anymore tools and materials if that’s anything
so no
this is shit
lmao it was probably deserved
FUCK YOU!!!!!
im kidding that’s sad
but like do u actually need stuff?
you contemplated sending your next message and thought of the consequences
but in the end, you were probably better off than him so if he did try to do something suspicious, you could easily just leave with your trident or defend yourself
i can bring some things over if you’d like
please oh my god it’s so boring here
where the hell do you even live???
it finally hit that you would be visiting this mysterious person
you never really had much to do during the day and he had nothing against your enchanted netherite armor when compared to his worn-out clothes
you were surprised that he was quick to be comfortable with you visiting him so continued to message the boy
if you live nearby i can just stop over and bring some spare diamond tools and armor if you’d like or smth
DIAMOND !,?’/:@!?:/-',(
ya sure lol
WTF
GOOD SHIT LAD! THANKS
WHEN DO U WANT TO VISIT???
his shock and excitement made you smile
maybe this wasn’t a bad idea
before replying, you quickly ran to your storage room you gather your spare items
instead of normally texting, you decided to take a picture of all the enchanted tools and armor and send back a snap
i’m down for tomorrow, turn on your snapmaps so i can come by ;D
he quickly replied back with handfuls of ‘holy shits’ and ‘YEAHS’
you couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear which caught the attention of your older brother who had just walked in to get blocks from the wall of chests
“ew why are you smiling at your phone like that?”
“oh shut up, tubbo”
“it’s weird”
you roll your eyes at him in a playful matter
“whatever! i’m gonna be out tomorrow to visit a friend, okay?”
“you have friends? wow, sounds like a first”
“you’re such a dick!!” you yell at him whilst trying to hold in your laughter
“oh yeah? go on, tell me about this friend of yours then. meeting strangers online, hm?”
“if you’re so concerned, you can come with if you’re not busy with whatever a president does. i promise they’re not some weirdo like you”
tubbo’s tone was sarcastic but he agreed then left you to your own thoughts
you were excited for tomorrow that you were restless in your bed when nighttime had came
somehow you managed to fall asleep from tiredness in the middle of the night
soon enough it was morning
before doing anything, you checked your phone and went through all your notifications
you then checked snapchat, browsing snapmaps and realized how far you had to travel
despite the long travel, you brought yourself up from your bed and gathered all the items you were going to bring
you stuffed a full set of enchanted diamond armor, tools, and over a stack of golden carrots all in your inventory
after finishing all your preparations, you searched for your older brother
with just a loud yell of his name he appeared almost instantly
“you ready to go, tubbo?”
“yep! you know where you’re going right?”
you scoffed at the question
“of course!”
and with that, the two of you traveled on foot until you reached the ocean
you had brought 2 boats with you knowing that you couldn’t imagine being in the same boat as your brother; it would’ve ended up in endless bickering
after a while of being at sea, tubbo started to become impatient
“what the hell! how far does this person live, y/n??”
“i dunno!”
you knew the general direction you were supposed to be going to after studying your snapmaps all morning but you couldn’t check how much farther it would take to get there; there was obviously no signal in the middle of the ocean
it felt like forever before you saw land in the horizon
suddenly you regained all the energy you have lost from rowing
“there!! that place with the white tent, i can barely see it”
“finally”
with the burst of energy, you got to land in no time
the moment you got off your boat, the blonde spotted the two of you and ran in your direction
once appearing nearly feet apart, he stared at your brother who also had the shocked expression
“TOMMY?”
“TUBBO?”
your brother had more of a confused expression whilst the other boy seemed a bit mad
maybe he was always mad considering the endless conversations you had with him ranting about some ‘green bastard’
but tubbo quickly got defensive, stepping in front of you
you didn’t understand how they knew each other beforehand, but at the same time you never caught up with tubbo’s friends either
you needed answers
“what’s going on?”
“y/n! you were messaging tommy this whole time? why didn’t you tell me?”
tubbo was clearly frustrated and a feeling of guilt washed over you
it didn’t click that you never exchanged names and admitting it did not seem believable
tubbo was in complete shock, trying to process everything that was happening
“WHAT?! AND HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING?”
you mumbled out your words
“a few weeks, i can’t remember”
“uh, yeah sorry” tommy had confirmed your statements. “i didn’t even know you had a sibling, tubbo! i actually didn’t know their name until now as well..”
“HUH??”
“but if i knew i was messaging a tub-ling, i wouldn’t have in the first place!”
“what the fuck tommy!!!”
“no, but how do you even know each other?” you had interrupt the two
tubbo had chosen his words carefully
“we’re... friends”
tommy had seemed upset at this
“tubbo....”
“no, don’t talk to me, tommy. you were exiled for a reason. y/n? give him the stuff you wanted to him and let’s go, this was a waste of time”
you were saddened but obliged, you didn’t want to anger your brother even more
“fuck you, tubbo! can’t believe this was how you visit me for the first time, i don’t even want your pity shit”
before you could react, tubbo led you to the back of his boat
he got in the front and quickly rowed away from the land you barely stayed on, leaving your boat behind on the shores
you looked back at tommy who already had left back to his tent
the boat ride was silent and full of sorrow until you arrived back at l’manburg
once you got home you immediately opened snapchat to message tommy
hey tommy i’m really sorry about today. i had no idea,,,
you thought he would’ve ignored your message but instead replied right after
but your heart sank at reading the message
it’s fine
i think it’s best we stop talking y/n
you didn’t want to lose a friend so quickly but after all the tension from today, you didn’t know how to come back from it
so instead of arguing you agreed, even if it wasn’t honest
yeah, me too
and that was the last message you sent to tommy
even though the whole situation was confusing from the start, it didn’t mean you didn’t enjoy the random conversations you had
the bizarre encounter was unforgettable
it made you even sadder when you realized the first time you two used each other’s names through text would also be the last
a/n: ngl, i didn’t think i would finish this on a kinda angsty ending but here we are! and grrr it’s 4am and i just wanted to finish this,, let’s hope there aren’t that many grammar mistakes LMAO anyway i hope y’all enjoyed <3
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marauders-venting · 3 years ago
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Hi,, I read your posts,, and they were all sooooo amazing!! I just loved them. That's why I wanna ask if you will write prompt for me. Prompt: Remus/ Sirius first date. Both of them are nervous, and share the reason of their nervousness with lily and James. Sirius/ Remus is nervous because he is preparing for the date. While other is nervous about looks or other stuff. And then how the date goes...,, English is not my mother tongue so, pardon me if their are some errors. <3
The Last Chance
pairing: wolfstar (remus x sirius)
genre: fluff
warnings: hints at death
words: 3865
note: i wrote this with @ probably_wizardingworld_art on instagram. I wrote the part with remus and lily and she wrote sirius and james and we wrote the rest together. they came up with the title too.
a/n: hi! thank you so much that makes me so happy :D! this is my first prompt so im very excited. i actually had a lot of fun writing this so if you guys want to send me requests/prompts i'd be glad to try write some of them (you can send the request on tumblr or instagram)! anyway sorry this took me so long to get to but i hope you like the result! :)
Sirius was nervous, which didn’t happen often so they were pathetic at dealing with it. He needed to talk to James immediately or his head would probably explode or something. When he entered the common room they were lucky enough that Prongs was already there; he was talking to Lily, but that didn't matter right now. He walked up to them and slightly tapped James onto the shoulder, making him jump a little.
“Hey James, can I talk to you for a moment?” Sirius asked nervously, fidgeting around with one of their many rings.
“Of course Pads,” James said. He seemed a bit concerned because Sirius Black was rarely that unconfident, especially when there were people around. “Wanna go onto the roof for it?” Too tense to give a proper answer Sirius just nodded. James gave Lily an excusing look and the two boys went up to their dorm, climbed out of the window and onto the rooftop.
“Okay Padfoot, tell me what's bothering you,” James requested softly. Sirius took a deep breath before he managed to start talking at least two times as fast as usual.
“I know it's silly and I know I'm probably already bothering you enough with this stuff but… you know our graduation is only a week from now and everyone is asking someone out? I wanna ask Moony out but I'm hella nervous about it and I don't know what to do…”
“I can tell,” James muttered quietly. Not quietly enough though, as Sirius still punched his arm slightly and called him an “insensitive idiot”.
Picking up the original issue, Prongs said, “Pads, we both know you've been wanting to ask him out for at least a whole year now and I also know you always kept saying you would do it next time. But Sirius, just in case it's not clear to you, there isn't gonna be a next time. No next weekend at Hogsmeade, nothing; this is our graduation Sirius, it's your last chance to do it. Don't let it slip like all the others. Ask him to go to the dance with you; you would regret it if you didn’t.”
James was right of course, this was his last chance but that made it even worse to him. There wouldn't be enough time after this to fix the friendship when Remus wouldn't want to go to the dance with him.
“For two years actually. But Prongs… what do I do when he says no? What if he doesn't like me this way? Our friendship would become weird and there would barely be time to fix it. I don't wanna ruin everything y'know?” They tried to explain his fear to the other boy.
“Well, if he says no you can still act as if you wanted to go as friends, can't you?” he shrugged. “Even if I can't see why he should say no. It won’t be much of a surprise when Moony likes you the same way you like him, honestly.”
“And if he will refuse because well, we're two boys and there are a lot of people and dammit we both know he hates getting a lot of attention. Do you think people would stare at us? Not that I’d mind, of course, just thinking about Moony there.” They knew the anxious tone of their voice betrayed his words, but he wouldn't admit that.
“You wouldn’t be the only ones though. Lily told me that Marlene asked Dorcas out, so there’s no need to be worried about being THE gay couple. I don’t know why you think you’d be that interesting anyway.” James earned a stern look for this comment, but he just laughed at that, then added, “really Pads, you’re thinking too much; that’s not good for you.”
“Okay… I will do it. I can do that. Totally not scared anymore. And HOW the fuck am I gonna do this?” They hadn’t even given himself a moment to let the decision sink in and had already started panicking again. James seemed to find it hilarious though because he was laughing his head off.
“Sirius, calm down for fuck’s sake. If I managed to ask Lily out you can ask out Moony; he really isn’t that scary.”
“I never said Moony would be scary, arsehole.” He gave James a playful shove before he continued. “Besides, you definitely can't compare that! You and Lily are already dating, she would have been goin’ with you anyway. AND Moony would KILL me if I would make it a big, public thing like you did. Would definitely fit my attitude, but if I want him to say yes I’m not gonna do it like you.”
“Guess you're right about that. Maybe just ask him to talk in private then? If you won’t get it done until tomorrow, I solemnly swear I’m gonna lock you two up in our dormitory,” Prongs said, grinning mischievously.
“Bloody hell, Potter! You definitely WON’T do that, got it??” James just poked out his tongue at that.
“Don't worry about it too much mate, it's gonna be alright,” he assured him.
“Thanks for helping out Prongs,” Sirius spoke genuinely.
“Any time Padfoot.” The two lads climbed back into the dormitory. James went searching for Lily to continue their conversation. Sirius was alone in the room so he sat down on his bed and started thinking about what he wanted to say to Remus, just in case he would remember any of it when he actually had to ask him out.
---------
“So do you know who you’re going to the dance with?” Lily asked.
“No,” Remus said.
“Why not?”
“Well, it may have escaped your notice but we don’t all have boyfriends who’ve been in love with us for six and a half years,” Remus snapped.
“Geez,” Lily said. “I’m sorry I mentioned it.”
“No, I’m sorry,” Remus said. “It’s not you, I just… I’m kind of really dreading this dance.”
“What? Why?” Lily asked. “It’ll be fun.”
“No it won’t,” Remus said. “It’ll be really stupid and there will be a ton of people. I don’t know, I just don’t really want to go.”
“You’re not going?” Lily asked.
“I don’t know,” Remus said again. “Probably not.”
“What? No, Rem, come on. You have to come. it’s better than sitting in your room stressing yourself out about how you did on your N.E.W.Ts.”
“Why? It’s not like anybody will miss me. You’ll be with James. Marlene and Dorcas will be together. Peter’s probably going to ask that Hufflepuff girl to go with him and he’ll spend all night with her. And Sirius… Sirius won’t miss me. He’ll be with their date.”
“Who is Sirius going with by the way? Do you know?”
“No,” Remus said, sounding agitated again.
“Then how do you know he has a date?”
“Lils, it’s Sirius. Of course, he has a date. Literally, half the school is head over heels for them.”
“Does that half include you then?” Lily muttered under her breath.
“W–what?” Remus said.
“Nothing, nothing,” Lily sighed. “So you’re really not going?”
“I’d just be standing there alone in the corner. I’ll be even more awkward than usual.”
“You wouldn’t be alone, Remus. Do you really think we’d all ditch you just because we have dates? We’re still your friends.”
“Fair enough,” Remus said. “And thanks for the offer but as much as I would enjoy third-wheeling with you and James, it’s a hard pass.”
“Come on, Remus, there must be somebody you want to ask to the dance,” Lily insisted.
“No,” Remus muttered. “There isn’t anybody I want to go with.” But the blush on his cheeks gave him away.
“Remus, you’re a horrible liar,” Lily said. “Now spill the secret. Who do you want to ask?”
“Nobody!” Remus insisted, but his blush only deepened. “There’s no secret!”
“You know you can tell me anything, Remus. Don’t you trust me with your secret? We’ve been best friends for seven years.”
“Which is exactly why I know not to trust you with my secret,” Remus said.
“Aha! I knew there was a secret!” Lily said. “Come on, just tell me.”
“You’ll laugh at me,” Remus said. “You’ll say I’m ridiculous for suggesting it.”
“No I won’t,” Lily said. “Rem, I swear on my life, I won’t. Just tell me.”
“Fine,” Remus swallowed. “Sirius.”
“I knew it!” Lily yelled. “I fucking knew it!”
“Keep your voice down!” Remus said.
“Sorry,” she whispered. “I knew it though.”
“Great, I’m a bad liar, you proved your point,” Remus said. “Now do you see why I would be going to the dance alone?”
“No, actually, I do not,” Lily said. “You want to ask Sirius to the dance so ask him to the dance.” Remus snorted.
“Yeah, right.”
“What?”
“Lily, if I ask Sirius to the dance one of two things is going to happen. One, they’ll assume I mean as friends and I’ll look like a complete idiot. Two, they’ll turn me down and then everything will get awkward and he’ll hate me and if that happens I might just die.”
“Oh calm down, Remus,” Lily said. “You accuse Sirius of being a drama queen all the time but you’re just as bad. First of all, Sirius would never hate you—”
“You don’t know that,” Remus said.
“Yes I do,” she insisted.
“How?” he asked skeptically, crossing his arms.
“Remus, a friend who undergoes a long and complex magical transformation for the sole purpose of helping you, is not going to hate you just because you have a crush on them.” He had to admit that Lily was making a pretty good point.
“That doesn’t mean it won’t be awkward,” Remus pressed.
“You know, Remus, I actually think they might like you,” Lily said. Remus laughed but even he could hear that it sounded bitter and forced.
“Lily, please,” Remus said. “Maybe he won’t hate me but they definitely do not like me. Not the way I like him.”
“Why not?” Lily said. “I was right about you liking him, wasn’t I? So who is to say that I’m not right about them liking you?”
“Lils, have you seen Sirius? He’s way out of my league. They literally have no reason to look at me like that.”
“Remus, you do not give yourself enough credit, honestly,” Lily sighed. “So how long have you liked them?”
“Since the start of fifth year,” Remus said, not meeting her eye.
“That’s almost three years,” she said.
“It is,” Remus sighed, still not looking at her.
“Remus,” Lily started, “I really think you should talk to him.”
“Lily—”
“No, Remus, listen. Do you trust me?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Bitch,” Lily said, jabbing him in the ribs with her elbow.
“Kidding,” Remus grunted.
“So talk to him,” she insisted. Remus hesitated.
“What if he already has a date?” he asked.
“Ask them,” Lily shrugged.
“And if they do?”
“Hmm I think you know exactly what you’re going to do if Sirius already has a date and you don’t need my advice at all so I would like to propose the alternative,” Lily said. “What if he doesn’t have a date?”
“I—” Remus buried his face in his palms, “I don’t fucking know.”
“Hey,” Lily said, gently. “It’s ok. Everything will be ok, regardless of what happens, Remus. I promise.”
“I don’t want to lose him,” he said, quietly.
“You won’t,” she said. “Remus, look at me.” He did. “You won’t. You know it as well as I do. You won’t lose him, no matter what.”
“Ok,” Remus sighed. “So I guess I’m asking Sirius Black to the dance.” He felt a flutter in his stomach as he said it. He was really going to do it.
“I guess you are,” Lily said, smiling.
---------
Remus walked into the dorm and found himself alone with Sirius, who looked up as he came in.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hi.” Ask him, said a voice in his head. Lily’s voice. It was his chance; the dorm was empty, it was just the two of them. He needed to stop putting this off.
“So, um… do you have a date to the dance yet?” he asked timidly.
“Nope,” Sirius said, looking back at the floor. “Do you?”
“No,” Remus replied. “So the Sirius Black doesn’t have a date to the dance yet?” Remus added, trying to relax. Just talk, he told himself, just talk to him like you normally would.
“How’d that happen?” Sirius shrugged.
“I don’t know,” they said. “I just didn’t really fancy any of the people who asked me.”
“Is… is there someone you wanted to ask yourself?” Remus asked, heart racing in his chest. Sirius hesitated a moment before answering.
“Yes,” he said slowly.
“So why didn’t you?”
“Same reason as anybody, I suppose. I didn’t want to be turned down.”
“Pfft like anybody would turn you down,” Remus said.
“I will ask him, though.”
“When?”
“Within the next five minutes probably. What about you? Why don’t you have a date?” Well, here it goes.
“I’m hoping to,” Remus said. “Soon enough.” Maybe it was his imagination but Remus thought he saw the spark leave Sirius’ grey eyes, the smile faltering slightly on his lips.
“So who’s the lucky lad or lady who’s swept you off your feet?” Sirius asked. Suddenly some gusto of bravery possessed Remus and he took a step towards Sirius.
“Well, you know them,” he said.
“Do I, now?”
“Yep,” Remus said. “He’s in this room right now.” Sirius’ eyes darted in every direction but found Remus again when they realised that there was nobody there but the two of them.
“Wait,” Sirius said, realisation growing in his eyes. “Are—are you trying to ask me to the dance?” Remus gave a small nod.
“That,” he said, “and tell you that I… I’ve liked you for a long time now.”
“No, no, no, you can’t do that,” Sirius said. Remus ducked his head, feeling the tears filling his eyes. He knew it would end like this. It was stupid to cry when this was exactly what he had expected. But that didn’t make it hurt any less.
“Sirius, I’m so, so sorry. I never meant—”
“I was just about to ask you to the dance!” Sirius said. “You totally stole my moment!”
“I— what?” Remus said, looking up. “You… you were going to ask me to the dance?”
“Yes, I’ve been trying to all day,” Sirius said. “But I kept stalling until James told me to suck it up and just do it already.”
“Wait, I— wha— I’m so confused,” Remus said, trying to get a hold of the situation.
“You… you wanted to ask me to the dance?”
“Yes, Remus,” Sirius said, taking his hand in their own. “I wanted to tell you that I… I’ve had a crush on you since we were like fifteen and… nothing would make me happier than to go to this dance with you.”
“Really?” Remus asked.
“Yeah,” Sirius said, wiping the tears out of Remus’ eyes with his thumb. “But then you got there first.”
“Maybe next time try to be a little bit faster then,” Remus laughed.
“Fine,” Sirius said, grinning. And then before he knew it, Remus was being kissed by Sirius Black. Sirius had closed the gap between them, kissing Remus firmly on the lips. And for a moment, Remus couldn’t breathe. Because this was too good to be true. Far, far too good. Sirius wanted to go to the dance with him. And he wanted to go to the dance with Sirius. He was going to the dance with Sirius. He’s kissing Sirius right now.
---------
For the fifth and last time, Remus checked his reflection in the mirror. It hadn’t changed within the last few minutes of course, but he was nervous, really nervous.
“Calm down Remus, you look good.” It was James. He had just come out of the bathroom, finally wearing his suit too.
“Really Moony, you’re worrying too much,” Peter assured him.
All of them had decided to wear a simple, black suit but somehow they’d still managed to look completely different. Maybe it was the fact that James was wearing a normal tie, Peter was going for a bow tie and Remus himself had just left open the top two buttons of his shirt. Remus didn’t know what Sirius was going to wear, as they dressed with the girls to avoid Remus seeing him in his outfit before he was supposed to.
In less than a minute James and Remus were supposed to meet their dates in the Gryffindor common room so the three boys decided to get down there and wait for them.
As soon as they reached the common room the door of the girls’ dormitory swung open and Lily started walking down the stairs in a beautiful, emerald green, backless dress, followed by Sirius and Marlene.
Remus thought he’d faint when he saw Sirius’s outfit. He was wearing a DRESS. And they looked absolutely stunning in it. The dress was a beautiful dark blue and floor-length with a plunging V-neck and a split skirt, and he was wearing a goddamn underbust corset. It was breathtaking. He only noticed he’d been staring a bit long when Sirius was standing right in front of him, staring right back, lips slightly parted. They swallowed visibly before he said, “You look good Moony.”
His face was probably deep red, but somehow he still managed to say something.
“And you look absolutely marvellous in that dress.”
Was that possible? Sirius Black, blushing? Apparently, it was and it was cute.
They had to be at the Great Hall any minute now, so Remus took Sirius’ hand and they all started leaving the common room.
When they arrived at the Great Hall they saw that it had been entirely transformed for the event. The long house tables that were usually in the middle of the room were pushed against the walls and held a large variety of food, snacks and drinks, leaving the middle clear for students to dance. A big banner reading Class of ‘78 was strung against the back wall of the hall and there was music playing although where it was coming from remained a mystery.
Marlene and Peter spotted their dates already in the room and hurried to greet them.
“May I have this dance?” James asked Lily, kissing the back of her hand. Lily rolled her eyes but Remus noticed her blushing slightly.
“No, Potter, I came with you so that I could dance with somebody else,” she said sarcastically. “Of course you can have this dance. Come on.” And she dragged him onto the dance floor, leaving Remus and Sirius standing by the door.
“You wanna get something to drink?” Remus suggested, trying to delay the moment when he had to dance in front of everybody and make a fool of himself. Why had he come to this dance again?
“Yeah, sure,” Sirius said. They stood by the drinks table, drinking juice (yes, juice) and talking for a while but Remus saw Sirius looking wistfully at all the dancing people.
“You’re going to make me dance, aren’t you?” he said.
“Oh come on we have to dance a little,” Sirius said. “It is a dance after all.”
“But we both know that I cannot dance. Like at all.”
“Come on, babe, dance with me please,” Sirius pouted.
“Babe?” Remus said, a smirk playing on his lips.
“Um, I-I mean… uh…” Sirius stuttered, his cheeks flushed. They put their head on Remus’ shoulder, hiding his face. “Sorry.” Remus kissed the top of Sirius’ head, lingering to smell Sirius’ hair.
“Don’t be, I… I like it,” Remus said, blushing hard.
“You do?” Sirius asked.
“Yeah.”
“Ok. So will you dance with me?” Sirius asked hopefully. Remus hesitated a little before answering.
“Yeah,” he said. “I will.” And he took Sirius by the hand and pulled them into the center of the Great Hall.
Remus was right, of course. He could not dance. But he was trying. The more upbeat the songs were the more difficult but as soon as a slow song came on, Sirius wrapped him in their arms and took the lead, making it significantly easier to dance but also significantly harder to breathe.
Right now they were dancing in each other’s arms, swaying slowly to the music. Remus closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Sirius’.
“I love you, you know,” he said. “I’m in love with you.” Sirius stumbled on his feet and stopped moving.
“Really?” they asked. Remus froze, realising what he had said.
“Uh I–I mean…” Remus stuttered, “that depends, is this a good or bad reaction?”
“Good,” Sirius said, quietly. “The best.” And then he kissed Remus. There, in the middle of the great hall, in front of all their friends and all their classmates and all their teachers, Remus and Sirius stood, kissing each other like their lives depended on it, like they needed the other more than they needed oxygen. And at that moment, at that moment that Remus' lips connected with Sirius’, at that moment that Sirius slid their tongue into Remus’ mouth and pulled him closer, at that moment Remus didn’t have a care in the world. He didn’t care that people were watching, he didn’t care that he might fail his examinations, he didn’t care about the war waging outside the walls. All he cared about was Sirius and the feeling he had when they were together. As long as he had Sirius, nothing else mattered.
When they broke apart, Remus’ breaths were shallow. He held Sirius close, their foreheads pressed together, his arms around Sirius’ neck as Sirius’ hands cupped Remus’ face.
“I love you too,” Sirius whispered. He could’ve yelled it, could’ve made a scene. The whole room was watching them anyway. But this wasn’t just something for attention, Remus knew. Sirius meant it. They meant what he said. He really meant it.
“I thought you would hate me if you ever found out,” Remus said, not moving away.
“Well, then you’re an idiot,” Sirius said, “because I could never hate you. Not even if I tried.”
“Me neither,” Remus said. “I could never hate you either.” Remus knew it was true the moment he said it. But despite that, the universe decided to put him to the test. It was barely four years later when Remus was desperately trying to fall out of love with Sirius, to hate him. Because how could you love your best friend’s murderer? You shouldn’t. But apparently, he could. It took another twelve years for Remus to be able to admit that he had not hated Sirius. Not really. He thought back to the day he told Sirius that he could never hate them. He wasn’t lying that day. Remus was unsure of many things these days. Everything seemed rocky and unstable. Anything good could disappear at any moment and more often than not it did. But this he was certain of, without a shadow of a doubt: for as long he lived, he would be in love with Sirius Black. And nothing could change that.
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words-for-holland · 4 years ago
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Quarantine Series: Birthday Date Night
Summary: It’s Y/N’s birthday, but Tom faces a slight problem. How does a boyfriend top off an accidental proposal while his girlfriend is working on her birthday...again!
Check the Rest: Burnt Out | A New Look | Secret Cuts & Kisses | Breaking Friendships |The Birthday Week | Movie Night | Silence is Golden?
Masterlist
A/N: Sad to say that Quarantine Series may end real soon with 3 more parts to go 🥺. Also this was inspired by my birthday which just happened fairly recently! Thanks for all the support!!
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“Tom, mate. You’re pacing back and forth is making me dizzy.” Harry warned Tom, as he lied down on his bed, laptop in hand.
“Sorry, but I don’t know what to do! Y/N’s birthday is in a few days and I have absolutely no plan.” Tom reasoned as he plops on the couch across from Harry. “I mean I already blew the proposal which was supposed to be her birthday gift, but thats gone to shit.” He mumbled, biting his thumbnail.
“Just be happy she said yes.” Harry chuckled as he recalled the day. “I mean has she given any hints? You know Y/N, if there’s something she really wants, she’ll tell the whole world.”
“I know, but she hasn’t said a word and everytime I do ask her, she says ‘I dont know.’”, Tom groans as he rubs his temples. “I just want to do something really nice for her.”
Harry rolls his eyes as he continues shopping for his gift for Y/N. He and Y/N always loved to share memes and compete in board games, so it was only fair he’d get her an exclusive edition of Exploding Kittens. The one with a hard cover box, that plays mariachi music when you open it up. To be fair, he also really wanted it too, so imagine all the rounds they could play in a single day. “You always say this every year, but ever year you always deliver. I don’t know what you’re so worried about.”
Tom sits still to ponder on his brother thoughts. “Yeah..Yeah I guess. Maybe I could take her out for a picnic lunch date. I know she’ll love to get out of the house. I’ll ask her to take off on Friday and it’ll be perfect!” He plans excitedly. He stands up, proud of his well thought out plan, already thinking of the perfect place to settle, the blankets to bring, and the smooth moves he’ll plan to swoon her away. It was completely foolproof.
Just two days before, Y/N displays a noticeable frown on her face. Sludging through the house, only made Tom drop his smile twice as fast when he noticed. “Hey, darling is everything all right?” He asked with worry written all over his face. Deep down, Tom prayed, hoping it was just something she liked was sold out or that she found out the ending of Hamiliton or something..anything but...
“My boss needs me to work Friday. Apparently they think it’s a great idea to put me as the President in charge of IT while he’s out.” Y/N says in a disappointing tone. “Im sorry, I know you wanted me to take off and I definitely wanted to for my birthday, but I guess it’s not happening.” Y/N’s heart feels heavy as she sees Tom’s equally disappointed face. “I did ask for Monday off, so whatever it is you planned we can do it then!” She mentioned, trying to cheer him up.
Tom let out a sadden sigh. He knew it wasn’t her fault, but of all days? Right when he was about to leave for Berlin in less than 4 days? Right when he and Y/N could spend another birthday together? At this point Tom felt like a hopeless man, as he stood in front of his girlfriend, who showed remorse and sorrow. Her long hair draped over her shoulders, and lips forming into that adorable pout that he could not resist. It almost made him smile, but only a little. “I know, but its not the same! You’re turning 24 and you have to work? Can’t you make some excuse?” He asks coming closer to her, smiling mischieviously.
Y/N’s brows knit together as she cautiously observes Tom’s behavior. She knew that look, that smile, that little bite lip he was pulling. “Oh no. No. No. No.” she says repeatedly, resisting the charm. “Im not gonna make some excuse.”
Tom comes even closer, his face bending down a little to meet her eye level, smiling as he runs the very tips of fingers on her sides. “C’mon darling, break the rules a little. I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” He whispers kissing down her neck. “Please?”
Y/N looks up and away from those deep brown eyes, still resisting. “Tom, you know I can’t, no matter how bad I want to say yes.”
Tom draws a line up to her jawline with the tip of his nose. His breath warm against her soft skin. He hums and smiles, “Is your boss a fan of spiderman? What about his kids? I for sure remember you telling me Zach was a huge fan.”
Y/N laughs as she rolls her eyes, but she found it so endearing. The fact that he even remembered your boss’ kids’ name even though he’s probably caught a glimpse of them once or twice during her zoom meetings. “No. You are most definitely not using your celeb status to get me off from work.”
Tom shrugs his shoulders, as if it weren’t a big deal. He wasn’t one for flaunting his fame, but if it meant he could spend another day with Y/N, he would gladly use it. “Please...” he pleads one more time. “Just wanna spend time with my girl on her special day.”
Y/N thinks about it. She really did want to take off, and Tom’s efforts were quite convincing to say the least. It was only a matter of time before Tom would have to leave for Berlin, and Y/N wanted nothing more than to spend every minute with him. But Y/N also knew that if she didn’t do as she was asked by her company, the higher ups would probably have a bad impression of her or worse...fire her on the spot. Yet she knew her boss was also an understandable and chill guy. It wasn’t like she couldnt take off, just not when he’d be out at the same time, especially when she was asked to be in charge of the entire department.
Then, it hit her. She quickly excused herself out of the room to talk to her boss, and quickly came back to Tom with a smile on her face. Tom loved the way she smiled, and how her one little dimple formed on the right side of her mouth. He knew she was really happy, and he had just an idea of what it was. “You got the day off.” He answered excitedly.
“No.” Y/N responded, “But I did ask for half a day, so I’ll be free after 12.” Y/N continues as she comes closer to Tom, wrapping her hangs around his neck. “Hows that for a compromise? And I’ll do anything you wanna do for the rest of the day.”
“Good because you’re gonna love what I have in store for you.” Tom says, almost ready to brag about his well thought out romantic plan. He was ready to treat her like the queen she was on her birthday. How could anything go wrong?
On that faithful Friday, Tom woke up Y/N to many many birthday kisses. Reciting how beautiful she was, and how he couldn’t wait to celebrate with her. Reluctantly he had to let go, as she padded her way to the bathroom to get ready and head into her makeshift office for the next 5 hours.
Tom was all smiles, excited to take Y/N out. While everything felt like it was going according to plan, his mates had other news. “Ninety percent of thunderstorms?!” Tom exclaimed to his best mates in the kitchen.
“Yeah, it’s gonna be a major storm out there. Probably the worse that London’s had in a while.” Tuwaine informs as he reads the news on his phone.
Tom became a stuttering mess not sure how to justify or ask how that could be possible when it was beautiful this entire week. “But...But...It’s so nice out now!” He says discouraged. “No, this ruins my entire plan.”
“Hey mate, dont be like that. You can still find a way to celebrate it. Maybe you can do something romantic inside?” Harrison offers. Thats when it clicked. Harrison smiles, knowning the answer to Tom’s problem. “Yeah..make a date night here. We can set up the living room to be all fancy like.”
“Yeah! Tuwaine Harrison and I can be your waiters and make your dinner. Then just leave you two alone to do whatever you want you want.” Harry suggests.
“Just please...don’t mess up the couch.” Tuwaine groans, thinking about the potential possibity. “Im getting grossed out just thinking about it.”
Tom looks at his mates, giving thought into the new back up plan. He smiles at the group saying , “Lads, I think we got a new plan.”
Its exactly three in the afternoon when Y/N logs off from her laptop. She looks up at the window to notice how dark and dreary it was outside. Thunder was booming, and rain droplets came down hard, splashing off the window. It was her favorite kind of stay-in weather, but she hoped it didnt interfere with Tom’s plans if they had anything to do with being outside. As she opened the door, Harry and Tuwaine greeted Y/N with their own gifts and hugs. They made sure, she got dressed up, and led her downstairs. “M’Lady, your fiance will be right out.” Harry says in the most posh accent he could muck up.
Y/N rolls her eyes, and the moment she sees Tom walk into the living room, her heart skipped a beat. He dressed up with a bouquet of flowers and balloons in his hand. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.” He says. “You look so beautiful.”
Y/N takes the gifts from his hands, placing them on the table. She runs to Tom, kissing him passionately, savoring the sparks that came and left with every push and pull of their soft lips. “You had plans to go outside for my birthday didn’t you?” She teases.
Tom laughs, as he throws his head back. “Yeah...I was planning a picnic and everything, but thats why I made sure Plan B would just be as romantic.” He takes her hand as they sit down at the candlelit table, eating, drinking , and talking away about anything and everything. When it was sometime Harrison, Harry, and Tuwaine brought out a cake that Y/N had only been fantasizing and drooling about since May.
“No way! How did you guys order it?! I thought they didn’t do international shipping for Milk Bar!” Y/N exclaimed.
“Actually..they didn’t. But the recipe was online and we made it ourselves, with Sam’s help of course.” Harry answered, as he placed the candles in the center.
Her jaw dropped for a good ten minutes as she looked at the rainbow sprinkled cake, and the fluffy white frosting that sit perfectly in-between the layers. The crumbs on top were surprisingly uniformed and formed a perfect circle border, she was very impressed with them. Harrison lit the candles as all the boys sang along...off key of course with hints of laughter coming off every other note. Tom moved to her side, placing his arm around the back of her chair and leaned in to place a soft kiss on the top of her head. “Make a wish darling.”
Y/N looked up to see her favorite people in the entire world, smiling. “I dont need to. Everything I could possibly want is right here.” Y/N quickly blew the candles out and everyone left with their fair share of the cake. It was just Tom and Y/N left. They quickly changed out of their fancy clothes and back into their sleep wear, ending the night with watching Stardust and cuddles in the dark. Y/N tries to look behind her to see Tom’s face, who in turn looked down at her. She smiled at him whispering, “I love you.”
Tom quickly leaned in to capture her lips before answering, “I love you too. Happy Birthday Y/N.”
Taglist:
@hollanddolanfangirl @parkerspillow @joyleenl @kihyunwifes @holland-bowen @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @marvelobsessedteenager @viwihere
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queen0fm0nsterz · 5 years ago
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For the ship thing: all combinations between the main five from woy !!
OMG UAGAGAGKASIDSFSKUGHS WHY DIDN’T I ANSWER TO THIS BEFORE!?!?! OMG JHGJESG THANK U SO MUCH ANON THIS QUESTION SAVED MY LIFE????
Disclaimer: I’m a HUGE multishipper and I’m interested in all the ships I’m about to list. However I do have my preferences, so I’m going in order from my least favorite to my absolute fave. Don’t get upset, for this is only my opinion. Ty!!
LETS GO MAD LADS LETS GO!!!!
Bonus 11th ship: I’m really into Something The So and So x Emperor Awesome. I called it Something Awesome. Just putting this.. out there
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10) Deathstar (Wander x Dom)
Ah, my two hyperactive spoons. Usually I’m all about the “perfect angel/literal spawn of satan” dynamic, but for some reason they never really clicked for me. Maybe it’s because they didn’t have that many interactions in canon??? But damn, the fanarts are super adorable!! i will die!! (death star shippers yall wanna come in my askbox and talk death star to me?? i would appreciate sm!!)
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9) Wandering Eye (Wander x Peepers)
First of all I wanna say, y’all Wandering Eye shippers are perseverant af?? they had like one episode together and it was early first season, it’s been a lot since that. i respect you guys. As for the ship itself, what can I say? I love small boys being in love!!! But once again, nearly no canon interaction... smh
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8) Astigmagmatism (Peepers x Dom)
THIS SHIP HAS SO MUCH COMIC POTENTIAL!!! I WILL SCREAM FOREVER I mean the angry smol and bastard tol dynamic?? PLUS theyre both villains???? as in evil fucks??? Who are also rivals?? If there were any canon interactions this ship would DEF be really high on my list but I don’t really have that much to say rn...
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7) Zboneak (Hater x Sylvia)
Alright at first I wasn’t really into it but I got my filthy hands on one (1) fanfic and you can bet your ass I was immediatly captivated. The thing I look for in Woy ships is comic potential and these two have SO MUCH POTENTIAL. Plus, “The Date” is one of my favorite episodes ever, so yeah. add that to the list. Let them interact in season 3!!!
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6) Death Glare (Peepers x Hater)
I TAGGED THE NO HOMO BECAUSE IM 100% THAT HATER WOULD SAY IT TO PEEPERS AFTER ACCIDENTALLY KISSING HIM IM SO SORRY
Ok so, Death Glare. At first, until late first season, I wasn’t into it at all. I’ve never been a big fan of boss/subordinate (saving a few exceptions). The episode “The Funk” made me do a complete 180° becAUSE HOLY SHIT DID YOU SEE THEM??? HOLDING HANDS???????? BRUH MY FUCKING HEART HAS BEEN D E S TR O Y E D...................... And while I do love them as a friendship, I can totally see them romantically!!!! also once again the comic potential
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5) Sylander (Sylvia x Wander)
THESE TWO WHERE DO I EVEN START. I literally tear up when I think about them? Platonic or not, their love is so pure, innocent, real, it makes my heart do backflips. You have no idea how many times I cried watching them. When they’re together you can’t tell where one begins and the other finishes .... but the reason why I’m so attached to them is because I happen to have a person in my life that... she’s the Sylvia to my Wander (hey @awesome---disaster talkin to you).  I understand how it feels to have someone this important in your life. The episode “The Ryder” is particularly hard to wacth (despite it being my number one favorite) for this reason. GOD THE TEARS I CRIED.
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4) Sylava (Sylvia x Dom)
What can I say? I stan girls being in love. Plus the CHEMISTRY they had in “The Night Out” omg.... I JUST FDSHFHLGLHSLLIHSBLIHSLI MY HEART EXPLODES WHEN I THINK ABOUT THEM???? I CRY  THEY WERE F U CK I NG HOLDING HANDS WHILE RUNNING OUT OF THAT BAR OK DO NOT TOUCH ME. when are we getting the good season 3 sylava content when they make up and become friends again? disney pls
Also, y’all got some good Sylava fics that I could read? Blease?? im starving
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3) Skeleton Dance (Wander x Hater)
IS THERE EVEN SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T LOOK AT THIS SHOW FROR LIKE 5 SECONDS AND D O E S N T SHIP THEM???? ITS IMPHASBLE
iM TALKING VALID BOYS HERE!!! The sweet smol/ grumpy tol is my aestethic always and Im all about it. Plus, I mean the dEVELO P MENT THEY HAD IN SEASON TWO!!! The episode that got me to ship them strongly was “The Buddies” and God my love kept growing from there????? ITS UNSTOPPABLE EVERYTIME I SEE THEM MY HEART KILLS ME
 Ok I will admit im kinda projecting on Wander a little bc I love Hater but can u blame?? me?? who doesnt love the hate man
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2) Dom n Hater (Hater x Dom)
Ok if youve been on my blog for like 1 minute you probably already know that these two are the light of my life, but why?
... well tbh there are a lot of reasons but to be quick it was a gradual process of me going from “Yeah right like THATS ever gonna happen” to slowly going on to “I mean its not even that bad” to “It’s cute? I like it” and then it fucking skyrocketed out of my control and suddently I’m crying like a little bitch during “You’re the Greatest”. I do not know what happened or how. It just did. 
I have an ask of someone asking me about them (BLESS U MAN) that inm going to answer eventually so I’m not going into detail but I WILL SAY that the height difference kills me bc it’s not that much but it’s jUST ENOUGH to make it obvious that hes shorter than her and im just oudfgusguaigGUivfehuhaf i live for height differences
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1) Black Eye (Sylvia x Peepers)
AND AT LAST I GET TO TALK ABOUT MY BABIES
I’ll be honest with y’all: I was actually gonna put Black Eye in second place at first bc Hater & Dom just own my hear,t but upon lots of thinking I belive this is the best option. because DEVELOPMENT. God I’m all about that sweet DEVELOPMENT we got!!! Wander and Sylvia may be the perfect friendship but Sylvia and Peepers are sure as hell the PERFECT TEAM!!!!!! BRAINS AND MUSCLES!!! TOGETHER!! TO SAVE THEIR IDIOTS!!
I am a BIG fan of enemies to friends to lovers, height differences, villain/hero, smol/tol, angry/chill...... these two were a gift from the Gods. I love them so much.
On an unrelated but kinda related note, I love how all Blackeye shippers just silently agreed that Peepers is a lovestruck nerd who can’t process his feelings and refuses to acknowledge them despite how hardly he’s pinning after Syl?? AND SYL IS NOT OBLIVIOUS AT ALL SHE ACTUALLY KNOWS???? its amazing. 10/10 best ship thank u for ur time.
And thats that! Wow that sure took long didnt it- but its here.
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fart-gate · 5 years ago
Text
SG1
Season 2 episode 9
🚨trigger warning: mentions of rape in my notes🚨
"SECRETS"
Notes by me
- the chief from abydos! Also daniels father in law :)
- no glasses!Daniel in this scene
- I love how dedicated Daniel is to his space family and their culture😌 like this random Egyptian planet was like I'm gonna keep you! And he said okie dokie
- "I couldnt possibly be safer than in the company of tealc" AKDEOSNDJSJSSKA
- Jack wants to go back too lol
- Daniel back in his robes 💕
- back home for daniel! To abydos!
- Bodyguard!tealc
- apologizing to sha'res dad for not being able to find her yet 😟 its not your fault babe!
- SHA'RE??? YOUVE BEEN HERE THE WHOLE TIME WHAT THE FUCK
- tealc:
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- shes pregnant and that is....really bad. If its one of the goaulds that raped her. This got dark real quick
- "husband!" "My daniel" I CANT HANDLE THIS IM ALREADY GOING INSANE
- he doesnt want to bring his hopes up that its actually her 😭
- hes shocked but like.....i would be too
- I was right its apophis kid :\ this so fucked up
- Host Baby??? Big Yikes
- okay I'm gonna say this right fucking now before i watch any more. If Daniel blames her and gets mad at her for being raped and getting pregnant WITHOUT her consent than i will personally come thru this screen and slap the fuck out of him
- meanwhile! Jack and Sam bonding time!
- SAMS DAD
- sha're thinking Daniel wont love her anymore :( she better be wrong or I'm throwing hands
- she said the goauld is Amunet? Is that the dog goddess? Or the crocodile? I'm getting my Egyptian gods mixed up
- Daniel sitting outside to Process™
- "hasnt she gone thru enough?" My brain stopped working I'm so happy hes not not blaming her. Writers for once youre doing something right
- man hes really emotional about this
- tealcs right they need to take her anyway for her own safety.
- do u think he sympathizes with her bc hes been raped too? Its not said but I feel like thats what it is. He knows it wasnt her fault. And that also means they can comfort each other about what happened to them😟bc they understand
- okay why is sams dad being a total dill hole
- "Ive heard nothing about you, sir." Jack youre not off to a great first impression
- Jack making sam smile with sly jokes
- her dad knows she be lyin about her job
- he wants her to go to space HAHA if only he knew. His tiny brain would explode
- Daniel said he loves her no matter what and then gave her a big hug im LOSING MY MIND
- are we keeping the baby??? Am I gonna see Dad!Daniel and mom!sha're ??? 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
- micheal shanks eyes are super blue in this episode for my viewing pleasure only
- protective!Daniel 😍
- I'm just remembering how they met and when she showed him the forbidden drawings in the caves and they spent days together just sharing knowledge. When he found out they were married(in her culture) and just completely accepted it. When he saved her bc he realised he was in love. When he stayed on abydos so that he could live a full life with her and her people because he felt like he belonged. I'm fine
- parents need to ask before they set up things like job interviews. I have personal experience with this and im full of rage
- this reporter literally having a recording of Jack talking about the stargate and Jack flatly denying it. Zero fucks given
- Daniel saying he wont force sha're into anything. Bc up to this point shes been forced into so much!! He knows he needs to let her make her own choices!!! He gets it!!!
- im sorry both Daniel and sha're are so pretty in his episode. My bisexual brain is just having a real good time looking👀
- I REALLY really love it when she calls him "my dan-yel" ❤❤❤
- the SGC has a mole???
- LABOR somebody boil water
- oh its my goauld mans with the sick earrings
- Daniel helping her give birth. Sitting behind her and helping her breathe. I'm love
- "this is where we hid from Ra remember?" Ajdjsisnana thats such a cool detail
- he'll never leave her again there goes my heart
- "It's O'Neill. With two L's. Theres another colonel O'Neil, but he has no sense of humor at all."
- dont you hate when youre about to uncover a huge government secret and then immediately get hit by a car
- shooting the zat gun into the camera was a cool directing choice 🔥
- sam: so I'm getting a medal for my service this week! Cool right?
Jacob Carter: I have cancer
- he could not have been any more blunt
- ok dude cant you just accept the fact that she cant tell you what her job? Dont you know what top secret means? Cant you just be proud of her for what she does already???? Dick
- "I will always love you!!"
- she is scared she will lose Daniel and the baby :(
- its a boy! 💙💙
- the goauld is back in control oh god Daniel run
- shes actually pretty scary as a goauld
- yeah ok shoot the woman who just gave birth tealc YEESH
- that was a good idea to frame Heru'hur tho
- Daniel hesitating to leave her again. My heart is breaking 😢
- they saved the baby at least
- poor sha're didnt even get to see her son 😔
- bringing the baby back to the grandfather was a good idea😊
- this baby is SO SO cute
- is Daniel a stepdad now. Is he gonna come back and play catch with the kid when hes older. Is he gonna fully adopt him. I want him to fully adopt him
- Jack blaming himself for the reporters death. You gotta stop doing this to yourself man
- black shirt Daniel 👀👀👀👀
- HAHA tealc shoving the jaffa into the vortex lmaooo
- "you dare challenge me?"
"I was thinking about it"
- WHEN JACK GRABS HIS KNIFE REAL QUICK AND SPEARS IT INTO APPOPHIS HAND
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- she definitely saw them and didnt say anything
- "are you alright?"
"No. No im not.........but I will be."
"She looked directly at us, Daniel jackson. And yet she did not reveal our position." YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS LADS. Theres still hope for my girl. She can fight this I believe in her ✊😤
- I will say it again tho. This storyline for her is very fucked up. No excuses, its just a bit over used in sci fi for the women characters to have surprise pregnancies.
~
Whump under the cut
Tealc whump: fought with jaffa
Daniel jackson whump: shocked, emotional, crying, forced kneeling, back handed
Sam carter whump: emotional , crying
🎶listening to You Are The Reason by Calum Scott and Leona Lewis 🎶 in honor of Daniel and sha're making me lose my collective mind
No glasses!Daniel for most of the episode
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rxcusant · 6 years ago
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Lol explain Kingdom hearts to me. Like all of it. Cause I'm confused as fk. Not KH3 tho cause I'm still going through it.
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buckle up lads
so theres a buncha keyblade masters called foretellers and theyre all runnin round like headless chickens cause their master disappeared and nobodys telling each other anything so they all start fightin (except this one guy luxu voiced by max mittleman, he grabbed a box and high tailed it outta there) and then it sparks a keyblade war for all the light in kingdom hearts i think ??? and then i legit forget what happens from here because i hate ux with every fiber of my being but it made this cool place called a keyblade graveyard, its pretty dope.
fast forward 1000 years and we got the cool wayfinder trio all living in land of departure about to take their mark of mastery except terra doesnt pass because Mark Hamil Said Darkness Sucks. also we meet this old guy Xehanort he kinda sucks a lot. theres these enemies called unversed rolling around and mark hamil tells aqua and terra to go stop them but ventus said HEY IM COMING TO and ran after terra so aquas left to be the mom to bring them both home idk and its revealed ventus is made of pure light and xehanort literally split the darkness form his heart and it made vanitas-- hes responsible for all the unversed, he sucks, we dont like him but we love him-- in an effort to forge this thing called the X-Blade (PRONOUNCED LIKE KEY BLADE I HATE THIS SERIES) that will open the door to kingdom hearts, and the x-blade can only be made when pure light and darkness clash, and like... restart the keyblade war and bring about balance?? idk. And xehanort wants to live long enough to see this happen so he literally possesses terras body. Cool! Just what the poor guy needed. Ven and vanitas fight and ven sacrifices himself so he goes to take a Very Long Nap and vanitas just dies like the bitch he is. But ven’s heart finds his way to baby 5yo sora who decides HEY ILL HOARD YOU IN MY HEART FOR THE NEXT 11 YEARS and thats why roxas looks like ventus. Aqua yeets him in the land of departure and then like..locks the world up and it turns into castle oblivion.  meanwhile terra and aqua punch each other and terras about to fall into a darkness pit but aqua sacrifces heself to get him out and so she ends up trapped there for 11 years and terra??is now terranort and has amnesia and this old dude Ansem The Wise finds him and adopts him and an apprentice. yeah. bet he wont regret that decision ; )
10 years later kh1 happens and sora and riku and kairi are chilling on destiny islands until it explodes and riku fucks off to the darkness and kairi fucks off to soras hearts -- i hope she said hi to ventus in there-- and sora ends up in traverse town where he meets donald and goofy. YOU SEE king mickey of disney castle also fucked off because worlds are disappearing to darkness and he left donald and goofy a note to go find The Key cause thatll help. so they do and they journey around with sora and become good buddies i love the trinity trio so much. eventually they meet riku at hollow bastion again and hes been posssessed by this dude Ansem whos not Ansem the Wise but is actually Xehanort’s Heartless (i hate this fucking series) and they find kairis comatose body chillin in the corner and they have a fight scene thats engraved in the memory of Everyone whos ever played PS2 KH1 KAIRI! KAIRI! OPEN YOUR EYES! ITS NO USE. THAT GIRL HAS LOST HER HEART. SHE CANNOT WAKE UP. oh my god why didnt they add a skip scene button. anyway they punch the possession outta riku and sora stabs himself with the keyblade to release kairis heart BUT it also releases his own heart which created his nobody, Roxas, who got vens heart???who thats why he looks like ven?? and it created namine who is kairis nobody because??i honestly forget i hate this goddamn series. anyway soras a heartless for a few minutes but kairi got her heart and life back and wanted to get some sweet sweet screentime and so she saved sora and restored him Thank you kairi. so sora dumps kairi off at traverse town and goes to give Ansem / Xehanort’s Heartless a good ol ass whopping ad they win and restore the worlds but kairi and sora are separated again I’LL COME BACK TO YOU, I PROMISE! I KNOW YOU WILL! WHEN YOU WALK AWAY YOU DONT HEAR ME SAY PLEAAAAAAASE OH BABYYY DONT GO oh also riku and king mickey and sora closed the door to kingdom hearts and trapped riku and mickey in the realm of darkness, that was a thing.
and then chain of memories happened. theyre in castle oblivion!!! whoa!! we meet the organization for the first time! whoa!!! we meet namine!! whoa!!! so like namine has sora-memory powers and can tinker with his memories and the memories of everyone hes connected to (AND HOLY FUCK IS THAT BOY CONNECTED TO A LOTTA PEOPLE NAMINE IS VERY POWERFUL) and the organization is making namine rewrite soras memories as he progresses throuhg castle oblivion to turn him into marluxias pawn so he cna use sora to like..overhtrow the organization, i think?? i hate this seriees. but it all works out in the end except soras memories are so scrambled he decides to sleep for a year to get all the right ones back. MEANWHILE RIKUS IN THE BASEMENT OF CASTLE OBLIVION and hes fighting his own demons i mean darkness i mean ansem i mean xehanorts heartless and he meet up with mickey a few times and then he meets DiZ and he also meets a replica of himself--yeah by the way the organization is making replicas, That Sure Wont Ever Be Referenced Again : )-- and its this game that rikus like YEAH I CAN USE THE DARKNESS AS POWER AND STRENGTH and HES GONNA WALK THE ROAD TO DAWN and then every riku rper put dawn in their url and i got confused trying to keep them all straight lord please help me im a little ol sammi
then we have 358/2 days for the DS which i never replayed cause it was tedious af which is all about the organization and roxas’s time in the organization and meeting his best buds axel and xion and saix standing in the corner being a jealous little binch PLEASE SAIX JUST BE NICE THEYLL GIVE YOU ICE CREAM TOO IF YOU ASK POLITELY Xion is another replica except shes a replica of sora but something got messed up and she got his memories of kairi which is why she looks like her but with black hair for whatever reason, i think nomura just wanted a cool goth girl to add to the series and we all thank him for it, and she and roxas become so close they kinda start influencing that weird memory shit going on and xion keeps trying to leave the organization to set things right but axel always gets stuck with the icky jobs and we got the iconic GO ON YOU JUST KEEP RUNNIN BUT ILL ALWAYS BE THERE TO BRING YOU BACK and i think around this time roxas is also super fed up with the organization and decides FUCK YALL IM DONE and punches saix and leaves. but xion finds him and they have a cool boss battle sequence got i love you xion you are a POWERHOUSE but roxas defeats her and she dies and its the saddest thing in the world AND NOBODY REMEMBERS HER WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ABOUT!!!! anyway roxas decides hes gonna punch kingdom hearts next cause it was xions last wish but riku, who is sporting a cool blindfold for edge, is like HEY WE NEED YOU TO WAKE UP SORA and roxas is all SORA THIS SORA THAT I DONT GIVE A FUCK and tey fight! and riku loses cause roxas has two keybladees! OBLIVION IS THE BEST KEYBLADE IT LOOKS SUPER COOL I LOVE IT SO MUCH WOW but riku rips off his blindfold and summons the darkness and he takes on ansems, xehanorts heartless, appearance and he squeezes roxas until he passes out and then they yeeted roxas into a data twilight town for a few days.
so enter kh2 with the 6 hours roxas tutorial in the data twilight town until he goes to find sora and returns to him. SO FINALLY AFTER AN ENTIRE YEAR sora wakes up with all his proper memories and so does donald and goofy and theyre like COOL LETS GO FIND RIKU AND KING MICKEY and they go journeying around the worlds again to stop the organization. meanwhile axels gettin desperate to see his best friend for life roxas again and kidnaps kairi but shes like HEY I AINT HAVING THAT and runs off and ends up in twilight town but axel finds her and kidnaps her anyway but then saix kidnaps her to the world that never was. and so soras like WE GOTTA GO SAVE KAIRI AND RIKU NOW cause by the way earlier like midpoint of the game maybe Mickey was like SAY FELLAS DID SOMEONE MENTION THE DOOR TO DARKNESS and its one of my favorite quotes in this hell franchise, so like THYE KNOW KING MICKEY IS OK that just leaves kairi and riku and stopping the organization. so they find kairi and they find riku and sora cries a bit and im just happy the destiny trio is together again. And DiZ showed up again, hes actually ansem the wise, and he talks about computers and hearts and research and xemnas, the organizations leader, is likeI WAS YOUR APPRENTICE! BUT YOU DIDNT LET ME DO ILLEGAL HUMAN EXPERIMENT SON HEARTS SO I KICKED YOU OUT AND RREMOVED MY OWN HEART AND THATS WHY THERES A HEARTLESS AND A NOBODY OF XEHANORT and ansem the wise is like YEAH BITCH and he explodes and riku turns back to normal but he also really needs a haircut. so they go punch xemnas in his zebra coat and riku and sora chill in the realm of darkness for about ten minute son the beach, i guess aqua was hanging out somewhere else, and they get a message form kairi in a bottle and the door to light opens and they go home and it was literally!!!!! a better fucking ending!!!! than kh3!!!!!!!!! thats my tea!!!!!!
so then we have KH3D, dream drop distance, which begins telling us ‘hey when you kill a heartless and a nobody that person is gonna be recompleted so uhhhhh xehanorts coming back Thats Not Good, make sora and riku do their mark of mastery test in the realm of sleep to get the power of waking’ and thats the whole game but its great because flowmotion! dream eaters!  TWEWY TWEWY TWEWY T W E W Y!!!!!! playable riku!!! fun worlds!!! soriku!!! except KH3D’s fatal flaw is THEY INTRODUCED TIME TRAVEL INTO THIS FUCKING COMPLEX HELL HOLE I WILL NEVER FORGIVE THEM FOR THAT. anyway rikus been doing a great hecking job!!!! except sora ended up in twtnw and kept chasing the dreams into the deepest pit of slumber and the organization broke his heart so they use him as one of xehanorts vessels [gesutres to my blog with will smith arms] yeeah babey. and riku is understandably like HEY GIVE ME MY FRIEND BACK and xehanort is like FUCK OFF TWINK and mickey and donald and goofy and axel, whos been recompleted as lea, arrive and steal comatose sora back form xehanort and xehanort monologues about the X-Blade split into 20 pieces- 7 of light, 13 of darkness- and so hes gonna make 13 vessels of darkness with his heart inside them and the guardians of light gotta gather 7 lights to clash and bringg about the keyblade war or bring about kingdom hearts, i-- i literally hate this series so much Why do you think i went on a year long hiatus??? i needed to calm the fuck down-- either way xehanort yeets off with his darknesses and soras STILL comatose and rikus like I WILL DIVE INTO HIS SLEEP AND SAVE HIM BECAUSE DEARLY BELOVED IS PLAYING AND if i continue this joke someones bound to get mad at me for ‘’’pushign a soriku agenda’’’ BUT YKNOW WHAT, RIKUS A REAL MVP AND PUNCHES A NIGHTMARE VEN AND SAVES SORA AND SORA HUGS HIM AND ITS GREAT AND I LOVE MY SONS SO MUCH and the kh3d ends with them saying ‘hey look kairis gonna do something!’ but Little Did We Know.
and thats your summary of what the fuck happened in kingdom hearts. i hate this game so much.
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lost light issue #23 wow god is really the only one allowed to have eyebrows huh
aw hell YEAH all ladies cover, fuckin love it
there goes another planet!!! lol fuck
‘god was my therapist. i strangled god.’ hjdkghakjd WHIRL
wrow tyrest really just b not believing this in the bg huh
oh wait rung is here?? fuck lmao i forgot he was one of the ones who was captured
skjhfdhs ‘are you god????’ ‘uh. i guess so?’ bruh
eugh sunder
lj: look hes - hes doing the thing-
me: shut UPPPPPPP
ooooh one million - except it’s actually ONE..... so cool
whh??? they’ve ALWAYS looked like this??? rung - primus - always looked like a twinky nerd professor????? fam
oooohh he started information creep?? whoaaa
aww rung....
ok so he just. took luna 1 huh! wrow. asshole.
interesting that adaptus is the evil one, though, instead of mortilus as everyone always thought...
me watching adaptus get blasted: lol
beloved ratchet???? officer, they FUCKEd.
also damn there goes solomus
ooooOOO FINGER DRILL
DID THEY BOTH JUST FUCKING EXPLODE???
time 2 escape lads
ok so that all happened offscreen! cool!
HHHHHHHHH RATCHET HUGGING DRIFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
whirl’s solution is for real god to eat fake god. of course.
shut the FUCK up froid
YEAAAH REWIND THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT
he made the matrix??? that makes sense, i suppose
OH that’s the deal with the crystals, he can just make more then? interesting....
why ratchet, tailgate, and rodimus though?? i mean i get rod - movie reference, anyone? - but the other two....it worries me, too
dskgjJHSJHDG cyclonus really cares about his boyfriend and (looks at smudged writing on hand) wrench and thotimus
oooh the eyeball teleported him to mederi, then...hmmm
ok explanations!!! that all checks out
hhhHHHH ‘i just think we’re at our best when we’re together’ IM REALLY GONNA DIE.....FATHER AND SON DUO IM ;___;
omega guardians...i’ll pretend i know whats up
ooh i love everyone chipping in on the plan!!! love that kinda thing
welp ok eyeball god is mad!!!! eyeball god is VERY mad, ohh no
lol get rekkt sunder and froid
ok not eyeball guy anymore...still bad!
oooOOHHH that’s where the warren came from!!! ok cool
oh, ok, so they’re evil and their plan is fucking evil. ok good! i wasn’t so on board with ratchet, rodimus, and tailgate exploding themselves
lol get rekkt eyeball god turned evil omega guardians or whatever
ooOO FINAL SHOWDOWN TIME WITH NOT-PRIMUS, HELL YEAH
NOW WE SAVE THE FUCKIN UNIVERSE BABY!!!!!!!!!!
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dunkalfredo · 7 years ago
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Im in love with your vision of Infinite and Rookie and i want to hear some of your sweet headcanons about their time together. If anyone asked something similar, refer me to this post, please. Thanks!
alskdjnsjklnljkls tysm!!!! yeah sure ill share some headcanons. i did a post on a similar topic about a month ago but that’s more their individual personalities/aesthetics than actual relationship material so ill go ahead and add on some stuff here.
i should note that portions of this are based heavily off of the idea that they grew up together so prepare for some au territory at this point. my backstory for them is becoming so intricate jfc;;;;;; i really hope ur not disappointed with this answer i have like an entire pre-forces narrative planned out in my head at this point OTL if u were hoping for more general stuff just lemme know i can give you some more hcs for that (there’s already some but there’s also Backstory stuff that i can’t really explore through oneshot format)
this is entirely self indulgent tbhhhh anyways click that mf Keep reading button
there’s a lot of like. casual touch. lotsa hugs and leaning on each other and resting their chin on the other’s shoulder (or top of head depending on who’s who bc height difference) while looking over them at what they’re doing and its really rooted in their learning early on how much Gadget loves that sweet sweet Physical Contact (if u scratch behind his ears he will melt, guaranteed, you’ll have yourself a Boneless Gadget with a two-liter coke)
if it’s raining out gadget will insist on doing something that’s not just sitting inside all day but snugglin w/ infinite ends up tempting him into doing Exactly That lol
there’s a lot of companionable silence between them when it’s just Them Alone in a Room. sure they talk and chat and joke but there are so many times where it’s just,,, being Together,,, and enjoying being in the other’s presence as they each do their own thing
sorta going into childhood/backstory stuff but uhhhh:
starting freshman year of highschool they started just bein each other’s dates to school dances even though they were “just friends” for like half of that timespan . i love cheesy stuff like that im sorry bro i had to include that tidbit i know it’s super specific and particular to my own backstory for them but just, they’re best buds and they gonna have a good time at homecoming lol
please imagine: those cute pre-dance pictures that parents take at the stairwell or front porch or somethin right before their kids leave, but with gadget and infinite. gadget’s got braces and they dont really fit in his mouth and his lenses reflect the light in the photo and oops infinite blinked and his shirt is too big and tbh their suits in gen just don’t really fit them right, gadget’s shirt is untucked and infinite’s tie is crooked but it’s okay, they’re both smilin reeeeaaaal big (and besides they figure out how to look Aesthetically Pleasing by junior year)
summers were hot in their hometown (note: i grew up in the north so i know nothing of True Heat, bear with me on this one.) most evenings were spent out on gadget’s fam’s back porch, cold towels resting on the backs of their necks, sweat in and under their fur, and they’re melting into the wood of the deck, fan plugged into that one weird outlet on the outside of the house that’s really more a fire hazard than anything else but the cool air is nice. they’re just lounging around reading comic books and listening to music on infinite’s old zune (lots of mid-2000s punk rock bands bc what else were u expecting) and in later years when they’re in that teen puppy love stage they’re trying to cuddle but it’s TOO DAMN HOT OUTSIDE so they resort to like, gentle hand holding, infinite reading some pretentious literary work or whatever and gadget spacing tf out next to him
when they graduate and are assigned a partner to walk down the aisle with they still end up w/ each other even though technically the partners are chosen according to alphabetical order and they’re on opposite ends of that list whOOPS how’d they do that? (hint: last minute shuffling in line)
when they move outta their small lil home town and into The Big City (im gonna say that would be Sunset Heights to tie in some canon plot relevance) they move in together and share a flat. a) its more financially manageable to just split housing costs like that and b) it’s been a dream their entire lives to live together when they’re older so oh!!! they’re older now!!!!! time to live together
(okay that’s all for backstory stuff back to reg hcs)
neither can cook but its ok
it may seem like they bicker a lot but it’s usually either the like, joke argue of “what do you mean craft mac n cheese is gross take that back” or reprimands like “it’s one a.m. time to sleep u Fool” (self-care is important, lads). they actually communicate really well so high-stakes arguments aren’t super common (and when they do happen they dont tend to explode. i wanted to have them be the type that argue for understanding and not to prove they’re right, so that greatly affects the outcomes of their disputes.)
infinite loves to hum while he’s doing things, or just in gen, and his voice is very low and smooth and gadget looooooves it, so much. they’ll be, i dunno, doing some mundane thing, like maybe they’re out getting groceries or doin dishes or something (i love me that domestic content) and he’ll start humming quietly and it just, it really grounds gadget in a way that sometimes he doesn’t even know he needs till infinite does it.
anyone here ever played bayonetta? any a yall remember those bits where there’s a woman in bayo’s memories singing and/or humming ‘fly me to the moon’ all quiet and low? think that but just,,,, pitched down,,,, yeah,,,
the tunes are usually very slow and while not so much melancholy theyre just? i dunno melodic in the same lax, smooth-tempo’d way a lot of melancholy songs are? i dunno i like quiet, introspective infinite and aesthetics that reflect that
here’s a long one: about a month before infinite “goes missing” and forces happens, infinite lands a job at a local news outlet as one of the column writers and even tho he’s more into prose than journalism he’s so fuckin pumped. it’s mostly just excitement over not doing cashier work and having a money-makin outlet he’s at least somewhat interested in lol …aaaaaand the way ship headcanon works into this bullet is that when he finds out that he landed the job he so excited that when gadget walks into the room (it’s morning and gadget literally was just gonna get some coffee, he’s still in his pajamas, he’s got bedhead) infinite sees him and whoops he tackle-hugs him and then whoops he knocked them both onto the floor but its cool gadget kinda let it happen and when infinite tells him what happened and apologizes he’s now also super excited and happy for him so now there’s two (2) people screaming inside (and out) about this awesome development
here’s a short one: they wear each other’s clothes a lot
gadget’s v cuddly in his sleep so he gets really clingy w/ infinite when a) it’s early morning and they’re just waking up b) it’s Late o’ clock at night and they’re chillin at home or c) he’s Actually asleep and within like three feet of infinite
i dont really know how to end this lol i dont really wanna just start repeating myself and i might think of other stuff later but for now pls consider the following: when they sleep whoever’s big spoon ends up resting one hand over the other’s heart and it’s super sweet
oh and they smooch a lot (i told you this response was self indulgent)
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spideyydarling · 7 years ago
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1-64 =u=
FYDGIUH*ORW OKAY I DESERVED THAT
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? only all the fucking time, like, lets be honest.
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? i would say 2
3. The person you would never want to meet? an evil psycho villain 
4. What is your favorite word? crisp (when u say it it travels from the back to the front of your mouth, its pretty trippy
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? acacia because it sounds pretty and looks dope
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? my hair is looking goooood wtf??
7. What shirt are you wearing? a grey singlet (tank top)
8. What do you label yourself as? idk a geek, nerd, introvert, fucking awesome
9. Bright room or dark room? BRIGHT
10. What were you doing at midnight last night? watching stackie compilations which are funny as fuck
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? none
12. Who told you they loved you last? my beautiful mother
13. Your worst enemy? um, like, no one? otherwise myself
14. What is your current desktop picture? oh god okay: @bbparker​
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15. Do you like someone? tom frickin’ holland baby
16. The last song you listened to? sweet things - twin peaks
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? NO ONE WTF WHO WOULD CREATE SUCH A THING, nah jk thanos that fat ugly thing
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? again, thanos that twat
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? the queen and give me a bunch of money and do good deeds like attempt to end world hunger and help people trying to stop global warming yeah
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) my collarbones lmao 
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? i would look mighty handsome and i would be really famous and stand up for women because if a smashing looking young lad was like “women are fucking magnificent they deserve equality and respect”everyone would be like HELL YEAS
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? if i hold my hands behind my back i can move them to the front without them breaking apart because im double jointed YEET
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? im afraid of not being able to escape the inevitable 
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. a big ass meatball sub from subway hell yes
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? food probs
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? NEW YORK BABYYYY or LONDON WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? um, im underage???? but i would say pina colads they sound nice
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? i am the ruler no one can de-throne me unless i choose them
29. What is your favorite expletive? WANKER
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? the little prince- its a beautiful book
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? probably my aunt that died, that was horrible, still is
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! New York or London 
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? my aunty
34. What was your last dream about? drinking tea then spiderman whipped by my house, like doin der
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? yep, yes i have rip
37. Have you ever built a snowman? IT DOESNT SNOW IN AUS SO NO
38. What is the color of your socks? blackkkkk
39. What type of music do you like? indie, indie rock, classical, hip hop, anything but country
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? sunrise yes
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? VANILAAAAAA
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) i know nothing of american but aussie footy? i got for the south sydney rabbithoes 
43. Do you have any scars? many, everywhere, im a fckn clutz
44. What do you want to be when you graduate? i dont know and its scaring me, i just want to be famous and dress in really cool outfits
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? i would want to be famous
46. Are you reliable? i mean, depends
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? are you famous yet
48. Do you hold grudges? yes? no? kind of? youll never know
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? thats a bit dangerous but probably a peacock and an elephant OR crocodile.
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? i have so many i dont even know
51. Are you a good liar? yes i am bitch, yes i am
52. How long could you go without talking? a while, when im alone i never talk, thats a lie, i talk to myself. idk but a while
53. What has been you worst haircut/style? THIS FUCKING CHICK OKAY, I SAID I WANTED MY HAIR JUST ABOVE SHOULDER LENGTH AND A FRINGE AND SHE CUT IT ABOUVE MY FUCKING JAW AND MY FRINGE WAS LITERALLY JUST A LINE HALFWAY BETWEEN MY FACE FEGUEIGHUIW I RAGE 
54. Have you ever baked your own cake? YES i bake cakes all the time and just eat them
55. Can you do any accents other than your own? i mean i can do a damn good english and a decent american i would say
56. What do you like on your toast? nothing, Vegemite, reeces peanut butter spread
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? a face
58. What would be you dream car? bugatti veyron
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. yes i sing in the shower, i also like to do the splits in the shower honestly idk either
60. Do you believe in aliens? I DONT BELIEVE, I KNOW
61. Do you often read your horoscope? sometimes 
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? L
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? Dinos 
64. What do you think about babies? get them AWAY
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cartoonbeatleskilledme · 7 years ago
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Hello I'm new to this whole lore thing and it looks REALLY confusing, can you give me a summary of what's happened?
aLRIGHT lads strap in cos this is gonna be long as shit. before i get into this i want to give a disclaimer, theres a 100% chance i’m going to miss at least one thing and i can’t give you a definitive timeline, so i encourage other people to reblog this and add anything i’ve forgotten/overlooked. im gonna put this under a read more, cos like i said, this is gonna be long
so the name “beatles cartoon lore” popped up a little bit after everything started - it was either an anon (as i remember getting an anon using the phrase for the first time that i personally saw it) or @icasms​ used it first, as they’ve stated such. either way, the actual storyline starts before that point. I am 99% sure @beebleborps​ is the root cause of all this, and I wasn’t actually there for the very start, but I was there before everything exploded. I’m not sure exactly what happened before I dove headfirst into the void, but I know that the castle from the first episode was already the main scene, and that Beebs had already been dragged into the cartoon beatles’ universe, was forced into occupying dead George’s body and became a vampire during the process. You see, at the end of the very first episode, the Beatles all die, for no reason. So at this point, there were four ghost Beatles, four dead Beatle bodies, and the characters in play at this point were Beebs, @beatles-fan-13​ , and possibly others. I’m not sure, but I know there were far fewer cartoon beatles blogs back then, and most of them weren’t part of this (at the time) little storyline.
still pre-lore, I made my blog and beeble sent me an ask on how i’d died (see my username for reference) and I detailed that I’d been brought to the cartoon beatles universe by force, had witnessed the cartoon beatles’ final form, and that they’d killed me for it by inviting me to a concert, bringing me backstage, and dismembering me using George’s chin like a knife. Since there were mainly the ghost beatles at this point, that brought more attention to a second set of Living Beatles that were in the castle, which were also keeping beatles-fan-13 stuck in the dungeon. So right now, as far as I remember, it was me, them, and Beeble in the storyline, with two sets of Beatles - ghost Beatles and living, second generation Beatles. These aren’t the Eldritch Beatles, but are instead basically the same characters from the cartoon post episode 1, but crueler. A lot of the characterisation and early inspiration comes from @wtfbeatlescartoon​ , who often points out how needlessly cruel a lot of the Beatles are in the episodes. The lore has mostly spun away into its own beast at this point though. 
so pretty soon after I made my blog, like within a few days, other beatles cartoon blogs began popping up to join in on the fun. around this same time, i’m fairly sure @spookycryptidgeorge​ aka Grey began to get in on the story, and that’s when I got the ask/icasms coined the phrase, “beatles cartoon lore”. (In case you are curious, here is the ask, dated July 8th) Now around here I’m likely going to become more of an unreliable narrator, because a lot of things were happening at once. @cursedbeatlescartoon​ and @crypticbeatlescartoon​ came into inception, with the latter joining the madness of the story, and not long after that, @vampiregeorgeharrison​ and @eldritchgeorgeharrison​ appeared and the eldritch beatles became part of the story. It was also around this time that everything started to get more crazy and everyone was becoming a cryptid/inhuman/etc. The main players at this point that were making most of the threads were me, Grey, George, and Beeble, but the others were also contributing, and I might have missed some other story points.
The story so far here was that it started with Beeble (?) when he was transported to the Transylvanian castle in the first episode by the ghost Beatles, also known as the original Beatles. They were trying to recruit him to join the band, and George was trying to teach him the guitar, but Beebs refused cos they were forcing him into it. Eventually, George shoved Beeble’s ghost into his dead body (the other corpses are still in the same place and haven’t decayed at all) which caused him to forcibly possess George’s corpse, which also became vampiric, probably because he was dead for so long. Beatles-fan-13 was brought to the castle somehow and ended up trapped in the dungeon, was subjected to experimentation, and Beebs was trying to get them back when I became part of the story. I was a ghost which, story-wise, had been wandering the castle, but was mostly tethered to the Beatles and couldn’t go far. I met Beeble first, I believe, and relayed my story, as well as the fact that the second generation Beatles had tethered my spirit to them so that I would preform menial tasks for them, and that one of the experimentation processes they had people undergo was cartoonisation, and that they’d done as such to me, which was a process that allowed someone from outside of the cartoon beatles universe to assume a cartoon form in their universe and switch out of it when leaving. (it was later discovered that only I would need to go through this process, since it was not a Roger Rabbit situation and everyone else turned into a cartoon automatically. I was a special case because of what species I am, which was not known at this point and assumed to be human) Most of our time was spent trying to find the dungeons and get beatles-fan-13 out of there, and at some point they’d stolen some of Beeble’s blood and given it to beatles-fan-13? I’m not entirely clear on if that worked, but I know soon after they became a ghost and now reside in Beeble’s tophat.
When Eldritch George appeared, we all learned that there were an even higher class of beatles, and the second generation beatles were more or less pushed to the side story-wise. The most powerful beatles are the True/Eldritch Beatles, but there were only two True Beatles - John and Paul. They had converted Eldritch George and an (unseen) Eldritch Ringo to become like them, but they weren’t truly like them, which was why they were defecting. the True Beatles were waiting for True George and True Ringo, who at this point have not shown up yet. Soon after Eldritch George appeared, @eldritchpaulmccartney​ , the first True Beatle, came into existence and began to pull the strings. Nobody’s sure exactly what their plan is, but Paul (typically referred to as Luap so as not to “summon” him, in a voldemort-esque situation) revealed that most of the people in the story aren’t human. Me, Serena, was never human to begin with and is instead some sort of powerful being called a Star Child, but events I’m not aware of resulted in me losing my memory and assuming that I was a human. I’m not even actually a ghost, but assume the form and abilities of a ghost because I thought I was dead. Grey was human at some point I believe, but they became corrupted by the True Beatles and the Cartoon Beatles Universe itself, which slowly corrupts anyone who doesn’t belong. Grey has mostly unseen powers/abilities, and so far, True Paul has let slip that he and True John need me and Grey for some sort of ultimate plan because of the power output we can give.Vampire George (separate from Beeble, who is also, somewhat confusingly, a vampiric George in appearance) is typically seen doing True Paul’s bidding and trying to find the full extent of Grey’s abilities and keep me/Serena in check.
Other parts of the story that didn’t really fit into that summary are that icasms can be possessed by a John, not sure which, and she stays away from the castle for that exact purpose. There’s some sort of rune on her arm(?) that allows John to possess her more easily, and keeps other ghosts/beings from being able to take her over. Beeble, after a while of keeping in George’s body, became unstable, and Eldritch George “fixed” this by merging Beeble with George’s ghost, so now only three ghost Beatles roam the castle. Ghost Paul typically hangs around Beeble and will sometimes possess him in order to get attention, though i’m not sure if there are any other reasons for this. More recently, @elemental-icee-cattt​ , some sort of doctor who may or may not be from the cartoon beatles’ universe itself showed up and has been helping keep Grey and me from basically dying, since certain events (like Grey somehow becoming irradiated after being possessed by Vampire George and Eldritch George letting me/Serena read from the book on Star Children in the Eldritch Library) almost led to our deaths and, due to our abilities, possibly the destruction of the castle and/or universe. 
NOW, that’s the story part of the Lore. The other half of the Lore has to do with the Cryptids, which are born from finding screenshots where the animators fucked up and everyone spins a story from it. I already made a post on the origin of the First Cryptid, Glitch John, and there’s a whole blog dedicated to the cryptids that’ll tell you their history, @glitch-john-and-friemds​ . At the mo, there’s Glitch John, Glitch Paul, Glow George, Octoringo, Eyeless John, Supereye John, and I’m sure there are others I’m missing. People who contribute to this part of the lore include @abandonedstage , @404bot , @lenshitposting , @beatles-cartoon-analysis , @constantcascades , @ringodidnothingwrongo , @foolishgrippy , @agesnotyetwritten and anyone else who produces art and fics for it, as I’m sure I’m missing people and I’m sorry if I missed you!!! If you’re curious, yes, the cryptids ARE technically part of the lore story, but none of them have really appeared (aside from a few asks from Glow George) so they don’t play much of a main part.
SO that is a Quick and Probably Incomplete summary of The Lore, and it’s really long but here it is and I hope you can understand it! if i’ve missed anything, again, feel free to reblog this post and add things, and if you have any further questions, just ask beeble or anyone else you see contributing a lot!!! :::)
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lukeysgirl · 8 years ago
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Relentless | Calum Hood Series Pt.10
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                                                   Part T E N 
Request: Being the cousin of Ashton Irwin was exciting, especially when invited to their tour to hang out with his best friends. You found yourself becoming fond of Calum Hood, who finds you annoying from your constant appearance. But what would happen if you stopped giving him that attention?
Word Count: 4.5k +
A/N: ahhh im sorry in advanced! this isnt extremely jealous!cal but it is there! i hope you all arent disappointed in me ahaa i really hope ya’ll enjoy this and please get it to 100 notes, as usual ! xx
Parts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty. [DONE]
                                                    I M A G I N E 
Dublin, 19:35 P.M. 
The Jeep full of you and the band finally began pulling over by a large home. It was lovely from the outside, seeming lavish with beautiful stone tiles and sugarcane plants. But it was extremely lively with bodies hanging around it, music blasting from the windows, and lights of all sorts beaming out. 
“Hey, you okay?” Ashton asked softly, poking your cheek to capture you from your mind. You look over at him and nod, half-assing that to him. You were unable to convey how nervous you were. There are several famous bodies with net worths higher than your intuition. 
“Just a little nervous,” you muttered, staring distantly at the crowd. But then Calum slipped his hand into yours and gave you a light squeeze. You turned over to him, being greeted with one of his warm, reassuring smiles. 
“It’ll be okay,” Calum said quietly. He gives you a gentle peck upon your cheek as the boys begin to hop out the car. Music exploded into the car once they opened the door. “Just stay by me and it’ll be just fine.” 
“Okay...” 
Hesitantly, you left the car and waited for Calum to come by your side. Once he did, the Jeep pulled away and Calum wrapped his arm around your waist. The music was loud and surrounded the entire place. Calum began guiding you inside while greet people along the way. You were definitely sure you saw Hayley from Paramore grab Calum’s arm briefly before you two entered the home. 
“Oh shit, it’s Calum fucking Hood!” Yelled the owner of the voice who you never thought you’d see in the flesh. Harry Styles, wearing a blouse of roses and black skinny jeans, said with a large smile. Pulling his curly hair back, he gives Calum a side hug while rubbing his back enthusiastically. “You boys came awful late, yeah?”
“Michael didn’t want to seem like a loser and said we should be ‘fashionably late,’” Calum said with a sigh, sharing a laugh with Harry as you watched in awe. It was insane to see one of the One Direction boys at a party this far from England. But then again, what do you expect from a worldwide sensation like One Direction? 
“What the hell did you guys do to pass the hours then?” Harry asked, genuine curiosity in his green eyes. 
“Isn’t it obvious? We watched some Glee and fucked,” Calum joked, getting a harsh laugh from Harry as he covered his face with his free hand. 
“I’ve fucking missed you, mate!” Harry says, planting a kiss on Calum’s cheek as they shared another laugh. His attention was then handed over to you, who stiffened and became breathless. “Who’s this lovely glass of water here, lad?”
Did Harry Styles just call me a glass of water? 
“Hold your horses, Styles,” Calum began, playfully shoving him away as Calum held you tighter. “This is my girlfriend, Y/N. She’s also Ashton’s little cousin.” 
“Oh really?” Harry replied, eyeing you up and down as he offered you his hand. You widened your eyes, looking over at Calum as he reluctantly gives you the OK. With hesitance, you placed your small hand in Harry’s large on. He then brought your hand over to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on the top of it. “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N. You’re very gorgeous.” 
“Th-thank you...” You choked out, having it barely audible as you were still in awe over being in the presence of Harry Styles. Goosebumps spread all over your arms from that kiss, still feeling the light chapped, but smooth lips on them. Harry chuckled softly from seeing your shocked expression. 
“She’s never really met many celebrities other than us,” Calum amuses, having you blush even more as some Panic! At The Disco began to play. “And she hasn’t been touring with us, so this is just a matter of firsts for her.” 
“That’s actually quite charming then,” Harry began, giving you a smile as he released your hand. “No worries though, Y/N. I’m just as dorky as Calum and them.” You found that very hard to believe, but you took his word for it. With your lips still slightly parted from shock, Calum goes and lifts your jaw up by the chin. 
“Anyways,” Calum says with a chuckle as he turns back to Harry. “Where’re the other lads? I was hoping to see Horan right when I entered through this door.” Horan? As in... Niall Horan? 
“He’s over at the back, by the pool,” Harry said, jabbing his thumb over to the back of the house. “D’you guys want any drinks, by the way? Might as well get yourself buzzed now that you’re here.” 
“Let me get a beer,” Calum spoke in his ear as someone rose the volume of the music. “I’m gonna share it with her.” Harry obliged as he disappeared into the frenzy of people. Calum guided you over to the side so you were no longer by the entrance. 
“Calum, why can’t I have my own?” You asked, more in curiosity than sadness. 
“Because I don’t trust myself if I get wasted,” Calum began as his lips were only inches from your ear. “I also don’t know how much you can tolerate before you make a bad move you might regret.” 
“That’s understandable,” you replied, giving him a warm smile as he gives you a quick peck on the lips. It warmed your heart that Calum was not only worried about you, but also himself. He seemed so cautious already, and you two just started dating. It seems like he doesn’t dare want to make a mistake. 
“Alright, c’mon. Let’s go find the rest of the dickheads.” Calum held you by your hand as he began guiding you through the crowds. You kept passing familiar faces, those that are splattered on TV and the internet. You tried not to freak out while Calum finally led the both of you to the backyard. 
There were cliques of people all over the backyard, sat in all the seats and on top of the tables. A series of empty beer bottles were ornate all around the pool. People were already swimming in the pool, with bottles in their hands as they held conversation. Lights were blaring everywhere by the DJ, who was on top of the hill that held a waterfall. It spewed out water into the pool, like in that one High School Musical movie. 
“Yo, Hood, over here!” A voice screamed, having you look over to see Luke waving his arm at the two of you. Calum guided you through, shaking hands of multiple famous faces before reaching the destination. You looked to find Luke and Ashton sharing a laugh with Niall and Louis Tomlinson. 
“Shit, Hood, how goes it?” Louis started, his voice fairly raspy but excited as he goes to give your boyfriend a big hug. You let go of Calum’s hand to let him hug Louis back. 
“Oh, don’t think I’ve seen you before.” Looking over, you see as Niall’s blue eyes dart into yours. You were starstruck again, feeling yourself stiffen up as your heart raced. “Are you a groupie?” 
“I-I...” You tried, but your words failed you. Luckily, Ashton rushed to your side and placed his arm around your shoulders. 
“This is my little cousin, Y/N!” Ashton said proudly. “We’ve invited her for part of the tour as her ‘study abroad’ program for her studies.” Niall smiled, now informed of the situation. He suddenly opened his arms to you and grinned. 
“Nice to meet ya, Y/N!” Niall began, waiting for you to fall into his arms. You felt your stomach churn, having you look over at Ashton for reassurance. 
“Is this okay?” You asked, having Niall chuckle. 
“Of course it is, c’mere!” Niall answered for Ashton, having you shyly enter Niall’s arms as he gave you a tight squeeze. He smelled nice, wearing a not-so pungent cologne. You reluctantly wrapped your arms around him, still in shock that you’re even in contact with Niall. 
“This is really just... wow!” You began, pulling away to stare at Niall. “I’ve listened to all your stuff and have been to a couple of concerts, but I never thought I’d meet you guys-- I’m just so!” You couldn’t formulate your words properly from the shock of just meeting 2 members of One Direction. 
“Aw, that’s so kind, thank you!” Niall said, getting such a polite smile from him as your cheeks continued to burn from shyness. Suddenly, an arm wrapped itself around your waist as you looked over to see it was Calum. 
“So I see you’ve met my girlfriend, Niall,” Calum began, a touch of what you believe to be jealousy rung in his words. 
“Wow, really?” Niall was amazed as he took another good look at you. “You’ve really scored, Calum. She’s absolutely beautiful, without a doubt.” 
“Th-thanks... wow...” You breathed, still unsure how to take this all in. “I’m really rocking this strong case of starstruck.” Everybody laughs as you give them a shy, small smile. 
“You’re starstruck?” Louis popped up in front of you. He bent down enough so his face was just a fair few inches away from yours. “I’m out of breath to see Calum with a very beautiful girlfriend.” You blushed, having Calum tighten his grip on you. 
“Thanks,” Calum said for you. “But now I feel like my jealousy is gonna explode if she goes and meet Liam now.” Everybody shares a laugh, with Calum joining in. But seeing in his eyes, he still had this sort of jealousy in his eyes. 
“Calm down, I’ve still got Eleanor by my side,” Louis teased with a cheeky grin. “And Liam is off with Cheryl playing beer pong, I think.” Everyone shared another laugh while moving on to another conversation topic. Harry came over and passed the opened beer to Calum. 
“Thanks, mate,” Calum said as he began clinking his glass with the rest of the boys. “Oh, Y/N-- Niall is the host of this party.” 
“Oh! Thank you for inviting me then!” You chirped shyly, having Niall laugh a bit. 
“Have you seen Michael?” Calum asked Ashton. 
“He’s with Crystal, playing beer pong,” Ashton informs, having Calum nod before he squeezed your hip lightly. 
“We’ll see you guys around, yeah?” Calum began, waving them away as you could barely raise your hand. You never thought that One Direction would be so kind to you. Especially with the audacious compliments in front of your boyfriend. 
“Where are we going?” You asked Calum while he dragged you back inside the lovely home. He stays mute, turning into a hallway that led into the living room. A large tennis table was ornate in the middle of it, with a large crowd around it. Calum shoved the both of you through to find what was expected. Liam Payne and Cheryl, playing against Michael and a pink-haired beautiful.
She’s quite beautiful, you thought, watching the two play with such focus. Michael quickly shot his ping pong ball into Liam’s cup, having the crowd scream in enjoyment as Michael puts his arms up in success. Calum guides the both of you behind Liam, seeing as he taps him behind the shoulder. 
“Mm?” Liam hummed as he gulped down the contents of the red solo cup. His brown eyes widened at the sight of Calum, putting the cup down to hug him. As he did, Cheryl came by and greeted you with a smile. 
“I assume you’re Calum’s girlfriend?” Cheryl asked politely. 
“How’d you know?” You asked, a bit in awe as you looked at the beautiful brunette before you. 
“Well, your hands are together, aren’t they?” Cheryl said with a fond smile, having you look down to see that. Calum was hugging Liam with one arm, refusing to let go of your hand. “It’s quite cute. What’s your name?”
“I’m Y/N,” you say politely, feeling your starstruckness mellow down as you finally met another girl. “You’re Cheryl, right? You’re really beautiful.” 
“Aw, you’re so sweet!” Cheryl says as she gives you a gentle tap on your shoulder. It was exposed after all, as you were wearing a white, off-the-shoulder shirt. “You’re a button yourself.” 
“And I thought I was going to get jealous from all the boys.” The two of you turn to see Calum and Liam staring at the two of you. Calum gave you a light squeeze of your hand. “Now I’m gonna get overworked by girls complimenting my girlfriend, too.” 
“It’s alright, mate,” Liam tries to reassure. His oak eyes study you for a moment before he gives you a warm smile. “She is beautiful, you should be happy that other people see what you see, Cal.” 
“Well, yeah, I guess,” Calum replies with a mutter, still overprotective as he pulled you over and leaned your side against his. His arm was back around your waist as he kissed your temple. “Still can’t help my jealousy though.” 
“Understandable,” Liam replies as he takes Cheryl in his arms as well. “What’s your name, love?”
“Y/N...” you breathed, your eyes completely wide to see Liam in the flesh and as well calling you beautiful. The One Direction boys would be the end of Calum Hood soon. “You’re Liam P-Payne...” Your cheeks flushed pink as the other three laughed at you. 
“Y/N!” A voice suddenly called for you, turning over to see the other side of the tennis table. Michael waved and gave you a wide smile, having you return it.  C’mere!” Calum says goodbye to Liam and Cheryl for the both of you before going to the other side to meet Michael. 
“Crystal!” Calum cheered, letting your hand go before going to the pink-haired girl a hug. Although it might’ve stung your heart a bit from jealousy, it was okay. Calum’s previous speech reassures you all the time, knowing that he very much loves you. Michael decides to go over to you and gives you a warm hug. 
“I just saw you, y’know,” you began, giggling as Michael gave you such a warm embrace. “You’re acting like we haven’t seen you in years.” 
“Calum has taken you ever since he got you,” Michael says, his voice semi-joking. “I’ve missed your constant appearance.” 
“Aw, Mike!” You say sympathetically, pulling back to ruffle Michael’s hair. “You’re adorable, I miss you as well, Mikey. But I’ll be on tour with you guys for most of the time, so I’ll be seeing you practically every day.”
“I know that,” Michael mumbled, looking down at you with this surprising shine in his eyes. His forest green eyes seemed more intense than usual, having you ponder this random intensity. His hands were rested on your shoulders, having you look up at him in this confusing gaze. 
“Hey.” The two of you looked over to see Calum holding Crystal’s arms. “Mind if I can share a dance with your woman, Michael?” 
“I do mind, but because it’s you, I don’t,” Michael says with a chuckle, having Calum roll his eyes as the two walked over to where the other people were dancing. Maps began playing, having you and Michael stand awkwardly as you watched your lovers get close and dance. 
“Well, shall we dance as well then?” Michael suggested, having you shrug before giving him a gentle nod. 
20:09 P.M.
It’s been a few minutes now and several songs have passed. Yellow began to play, the slow melody causing a few people to take a seat while others grabbed their dance partners close. Michael politely kept a distance from you as he held you a little more above your waist so he didn’t seem disrespectful. 
“You know it’s okay to hold my waist, right?” You said with a snort, your hands around Michael’s neck. “We’re childhood friends after all.” 
“I know,” Michael mumbled, his green eyes dimming a bit. “I just prefer it like this.” 
“Okay.” A few seconds pass, and a voice finally starts to sing in the song. The two of you slowly danced in a circle in simple 2-step motions. As you did, Michael seemed a bit bothered, with a tiny sad glimmer hinted in the shines of his eyes. They were directed towards Calum and Crystal, who were a little more closer than the both of you as she rested her head on his shoulder. 
Look at the stars, look how they shine for you
“Do you feel it?” Michael began again, going a little closer to you to speak more at your ear. You picked up your head a bit and looked up at Michael, seeing as his eyes were back to lock onto yours. 
And everything you do... Yeah, they were all yellow
“Feel what?” You asked softly, small shatter happening around you as the peaceful song resumed to play. 
“His love.” Silence emerged in your mind as you looked into Michael’s eyes. He was talking about Calum, wasn’t he? You bit your bottom lip a bit and nodded, giving him that as you answer as Michael nodded in return to take it. “Make sure to remember this feeling as much as possible.” 
“Hm?” You were puzzled, unsure as to what Michael was getting at. 
I came along... I wrote a song for you
“I know that the both of you just hooked up, but it’s obvious that love is at it’s strongest at the beginning for most cases,” Michael said lowly, diverting his eyes down to the floor as he spoke. “So I want you to remember this feeling very well.” 
And all the things you do, and it was called yellow
“Why are you telling me this?” You asked softly. You weren’t angry or upset with him. Genuine curiosity sprouted in your mind while in this conversation with the bleach-haired boy. The music continues as the conversation stood still between the both of you. 
“So that when there ever comes a time when you think you don’t feel it,” Michael began, raising his eyes once more to introduce you to that small hint touch of sadness. “Remind yourself of that feeling so you understand the difference of being loved properly and not.” You looked into Michael’s eyes, his sadness wiped away with genuine care. 
Your skin, oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful 
You know, you know I love you so
“Thank you, Mikey,” you said softly, getting a genuine smile from Michael’s lips. You went up and gave him a tight hug, feeling his arms wrap around you in return to create the embrace. His hand safey placed itself in your head, weaving into your hair slightly. It felt warm and safe, knowing how much Michael cared about you. No matter what happens, you’d know that Michael would be there, ready with his arms open and his warm smile welcoming. 
You know I love you so...
“Hurry up and finish your damn bottle, Harry!” Liam demanded as Harry began chugging his Murphy’s bottle. You all cheered him on as he had a bit of beer streaming down the curve of his lips and down to his chin. It began dripping down to the carpet, having you all laugh as he lets out a loud burp. 
“You’re fucking disgustin’ mate!” Niall yelled as he playfully waved the air in front of him. You with the entirety of 5SOS and 1D were sat in a circle with Cheryl and a few more party goers. Everyone wanted to play a bit of Truth or Dare, hence initiating this. 
“At least he emptied it, yeah?” Louis joked, everybody laughing again as he nudged Niall. Harry wiped the streaming beer away as he rubbed his hands together in preparation for the game. As Liam announced the rules, Calum pulled you over between his legs, forcing you to pull your legs together from this new seating arrangement. Thankfully, you had shorts on so it was much easier to do so. Calum’s arms wrapped around your belly as he held you close, feeling his torso from your back. 
“Alright, who wants to be the lucky bastard to go first?” Liam announces, having Luke wave his hand like a little kid in class trying to participate. “Alright Hemmings, here.” Liam places the bottle in the middle of everybody, having Luke stretch out from his comfortable seating as he spun the bottle. It landed on Niall. 
“Oh, the lucky host gets the first go!” Calum cheered happily, having you giggle from his immense excitement. Niall’s eyes go a bit wide before laughing while looking at Luke. 
“I dare you to chug these 3 cans of beers here in under 2 minutes,” Luke says as he glanced over at the beers behind him. He tosses them to Niall, who gladly takes them as Louis takes out his pocket knife to make a hole in the first one. 
“Let’s go, Niall!” Harry screamed, initiating the start of the dare as Niall begins to down the can. It was so hyper and explosive, the energy of the game. Calum was as well into it, but couldn’t help peck a few kisses against your neck. He’d rub his fingertips against the spine of your back, seeing the way you contort your body slightly from the light, but strong motion. 
In the end, Niall drank those beers in a minute and 42 seconds. 
Everybody continued the game, all the fun in it as they did ridiculous dares. From Cheryl kissing another girl to Ashton giving a bad lap dance to Louis. You loved the atmosphere, even while Calum kept passing dares for you that involved doing things with other people that wasn’t him. 
“Calum, it’s you,” a girl beside him announces as Calum looks past you to see the bottle pointed at his foot. He shrugs and let’s out a ‘can’t be helped’ as he looked over at who spun it. It was Harry, of course. 
“Truth or dare, loser,” Harry asked, having Calum stick his tongue out at him as he thought for a good moment. 
“How about truth?” Calum said, almost suggestively, as he held you tight. Everybody else groaned a bit, as they didn’t enjoy truths. They were typically boring at most parties. 
“Hmm...” Harry thought, tapping at his chin as he stared up at the ceiling. But then his green eyes darted back down to you and his lips suddenly formed into a smirk. “Tell us your real feelings about Y/N. And be honest.”
A frenzy of ‘ooo’s began as all the girls stared at Calum eagerly. Even the boys seemed interested in what Calum has to say. You blushed, looking behind at Calum as he studied your face closely. He held a stern face, but his lips slowly curved into a soft smile before turning back to the circle. 
“My real feelings?” Calum repeated. “I’d have to say that I adore her with every single atom of my body. If you’re asking for my real feelings, that’s the only real response I can give you. Nobody here would ever get to understand my feelings for her with mere words. Not even lyrics to songs dedicated to her could do justice over my love for her. I wish I could tell you guys, though. But let’s just say that my love for her is unconditional, unreasonable, and inexplicable.” With that, Calum finishes by placing a cheek against the back of your neck.
Silence stilled in the circle before Ashton chirped in. 
“Well shit,” Ashton began, staring at the both of you with a heavy gaze. “Fuck me, I’m glad my cousin isn’t dating so much of a dickhead.” 
“Pardon you!” Calum spat as he wrapped his arms around you tightly while everybody else laughed. Everyone continued the game fine, but as for yourself, you were too busy thinking about Calum’s words. They meant so much to you that you were in disbelief that you could even breathe. He always knew how to make you breathless, and these were the kinds of moments where you couldn’t even imagine how he was even yours in the first place. 
22:15 P.M.
It was barely late, but the night was not as young as it once was. The game of Truth or Dare lasted a little under 2 hours, exhausting everybody from the new facts everybody learned about one another. But Calum decided that being in the house too long was choking. So he led the both of you outside to the pool, which was practically vacant. Few couples were there as well, sharing either sentimental conversations or heated kisses. 
“Are you having a good time, love?” Calum asked softly into your ear as he kissed your cheek. You nod, swishing your feet slowly in the pool as Calum grabbed your waist and pulled you closer. He places your legs over his sloppily, the tips of your toes now touching the water. 
“Yeah, it’s been really nice,” you respond softly, leaning your head against Calum’s shoulder as he rubs your shoulder. “Everybody was so nice and accepting of me, it was so wild. Especially One Direction, that was a roller coaster on my heart.” 
“Same here,” Calum said with a low chuckle. “Although I really wanted you to meet them, I was very jealous when they complimented you so much.” 
“There’s no need to be,” you tried reassuring Calum, rubbing his knee a bit with your hand. “I’m only set on you.” 
“I know that, baby,” Calum responded softly, planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. “And I’m glad everybody acknowledges how gorgeous you are, because you are. I just get a little insecure.” You give his shoulder a kiss before leaning on it once more. 
“I’m all yours, Calum, I promise.” 
The both of you allowed silence to swallow the conversation, having you appreciating one another’s company. Calum then stops leaning with his other arm and sits up a bit. He takes you into both of his arms to give you a real hug. One warm and full of love. He rubs your arm slowly, admiring the smoothness of it with his calloused hand.
“I love you, Y/N,” Calum whispers on your head. You felt those plump lips against your scalp, feeling him give you another light squeeze. “I love you so, so much.” At that moment, you felt all sorts of elated and excited. Not only because of how he loved you, but how he was going to show you it as the two of you develop your new relationship. 
You felt the sparkle strongly there as your eyes noticed a large star in the sky. In that vast universe, there were little freckles of stars on them without knowing where they’ve come from. But here was this large star, shining much brighter than the rest as it looked down at the both of you. 
It looked a little more yellow than just a simple white dot. 
You felt Calum rest his head against yours, his breathing a little heavier than just a moment ago. He was likely taking himself a small nap, with his arms still tightly around you. A few quiet snores escaped his nose as your pairs of feet floated on the chlorinated water. Giving focus to that star once more, you smile and close your eyes as well. 
I can feel it, Michael. I feel properly loved by him, I promise. 
ahhh this was so long wth ! im so sry that it ended up so long, but i lost a bit of control aha. please do tell me whatcha think right over here. thank you all for the support, it is insanely amazing and i love it so much. i might not be able to write as frequently now due to class, but i will continue writing. for ya’ll xx
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