#im going to kill everyone

[crimeboys]

c!crimeboys they are literally just like they are best friends they are brothers they are just two assholes who managed to find each other and love each other more than anything else in the world including themselves they’re so fucked up they’re so miserable they are a light in each other’s dark even when they’re the one blocking out the other’s sun they just want to be together fighting and laughing and hanging out by each others sides and even a universe away at the end of the day it was all for each other a nation a home a fucking LIFE

[evanox]

hi does anyone have tips on how to calm down after your professor says something so fucking stupid that's so easily disproven by a simple google search bc at this rate i think my colon is going to pop

[paleode-ology]

NO THEY DIDNT THEY DUCKING DIDNT YOURE JOKING YOURE KIDDING WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK NONONONONONONPNONONONONONONONO WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT WHAT THE AFYUAL FUCKING SHIT WHAT THE HELL ABSOLUTEKY NOT NO THAT DID NOT FUCKING HAPPEN WHAT THE HELL DAVID JENKINS YOU FUCKING TWAT YOU SON OF A BITCH IM GOING TO FUCKING MURDER YOU

[bibleofficial]

on the plane in my seat i’m literally holding crutches i’ve taken my 4 benadryl i’m flight ready

[noritaro]

i just realized that the Onceler unironically fits into the IRL friend groups inside joke (for lack of better words) "the Nori sexyman/babygirl/meow meow requirements"

[kaoharu]

THIS ISMAKING ME SO MAD THEYRE CONNECTED AND VOLUME IS ALL THE WAY UP BUT I CANT HEAR SHIT

[benreyfaggot]

hot take but i think public indecency is bad

[oars]

[regigigaz]

My tummy kind of hurts right n9w

[snowangeldotmp3]

btw i feel like this shouldn't have to be said but the reason that agatha hates rio is because agatha didn't get to say goodbye to nicky. rio couldn't offer her any more time. and, in rio's mind, nicky going peacefully in his sleep (and even telling him to turn around and kiss agatha goodbye!!) is the one grace rio feels she can give agatha. nicky doesn't suffer. he doesn't fight. he just...goes. he goes on a walk with his mother and kisses his mama goodbye. but agatha doesn't get to say goodbye!!! she doesn't get those final moments with him!! she wakes up and he's already gone.

[starry-bi-sky]

on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.

Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.

Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.

Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.

There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.

[bluerosefox]

Mama Bat

There was a baby in the Batcave.

There was a baby in the Batcave.

There was a glowing, white haired, Lazarus green eyed baby floating in the freaking Batcave!

A baby that was currently wearing a superhero themed footy pajamas and making tiny circles in the air as they coo and make spit bubbles.

A baby Cass had found while on patrol... in Hong Kong before suddenly and somehow appearing in Gotham. In the Batcave.

Along with them, sitting innocently on the batcomputer chair was a baby bag (themed after Black Bat somehow) full of everything a baby needed a glowing green sticky note with purple handwriting on it.

'Cassandra Cain-Wayne

Take care of our little Ghostling. Everything will make sense in due time.

P.S Daniel enjoys the stars.

-CW'

By the time Bruce finished reading the note aloud, Cass had manged to get a hold of the baby who was making happy noises and patting her cheek.

And a second later a blinding light overtook the baby and once the light was gone, the baby now had black hair and bright blue eyes.

[lunarsapphism]

wish my family (particularly my sister) would actually fucking knock on my door before coming into my room !! the whole they're just suddenly in my room and i go "what the fuck please knock" and they're like "i did" no you didn't! if it wasnt loud enough for me to hear and actually tell you yeah you can come in then no you did not knock!! thats how that shit is supposed to work! not tiny little taps that i cant hear and then you just open my door whether i said something or not. oh my fucking god. i was sleeping. just cause you assumed i was up cause everyone else is does not mean i actually was

[mingyusbinch]

REST IN PEACE, DEAR MOONBIN (1998-2023)

[dizzybizz]

"this is regrettably the best kiss of your life, you understand?"

[mohntilyet]

illario as the grandchild that is most like caterina is something i'm loving to chew on. the grandson that took her lessons to heart the most. kill anyone who sees your face and knows your name, "we are not revolutionaries", the first out of the two to prioritise the contract. power at any cost, and the only one to lean into the unnecessary abuse that their grandmother told them was tradition. why is anyone surprised he allied with the venatori? and then there's illario's considerable skill in infiltration and manipulating any mark, he has always had the charisma that lucanis lacked. illario isn't attached, he has/can/will use someone and immediately drop them; "that does free me from promises i don't intend to keep". he can lie about how much he cares so well that he fools a magister into believing he loves her. he kills zara without hesitation to cover his own tracks, meanwhile lucanis blindly promises a young girl in the middle of a siege that he will help her find her father. even the lessons about family stick with him, and in this entire messy power struggle, he never actually orders anyone to directly kill caterina or lucanis, not until he's backed into a corner.

and even after all that. despite even lucanis believing illario should be first talon, lucanis is still the better killer. illario is not strong enough to be the brutal assassin caterina needs him to be. so when lucanis seems to fill the role his mother left, grief and love for her dead heir apparent remains, and any of the other qualities caterina needs in her next talon doesn't matter. whatever his mother was, lucanis has to be. what illario does doesn't matter, because he will always be second best to caterina's memory of her favored daughter.