#im going to disappear now goodbye
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Setting him free into the wild - Eclipse, as inspired by the Lord Darkar/ the Shadow Phoenix from Winx Club
(some pics of the guy under the cut)
I mean come on, dark red color scheme and armor and robotic limbs are close enough aesthetically <3
#post let luce#dcamv#fnaf eclipse#im. im not tagging the inspiration if theres an active fandom for that they dont need the blorbo infection#my art#I was normal about Darkar okay yes totally just believe me#I mean. I *was* bc I was a kid. But I sure was 👀 at the spiky robo skeleton#AND he spits fire?#anyways yes#im not gonna do anything with him i just needed to draw it bc of the similar color scheme#im going to disappear now goodbye
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im so fucking happy that one group project partner dropped out i was gonna be fighting them all presentation bc we're both kinda controlling but now that they're gone all i have left is the lowkey kinda meek kinda nonassertive kinda a pushover partner so now i get to basically have free reign and be the person In Charge and i looooove being in charge ive been waiting for this i get to do everything and i can compromise nicely w the partner i have left and i get to be soooo funny and beautiful while i present and i get to make the whole class fight to the death over kahoot *sighs dreamily* i love being given free reign i love people i dont like dropping out and most of all i love kahoot
#group project no longer killing me i am now having soo much fun im having the most fun i used to HATE presenting but i learned that actually#i love attention and i love doing whatever the FUCK i want forever adn ever and ever adn everyone loves me bc im so funny and beautiful#and im gonna stay up late to glitterify my powerpoint bc now that my BORING partner is gone i will have fun with this or i'll die trying.#oooh i should wear my heels wait no im a pacer hmm wait actually that could be cool loud footsteps are attention grabbers hmm i will#think on this but i need u to know that im living my fantasy called having a whole class's attention and nobody can stop me#long time followers/moots may remember my sadomasochism presentation this will not be that fun and cool but i will fucking make#it better and more fun than anyone else's because i am not the type to be upstaged no fucking way am i letting one of those lame ass#losers upstage my fucking presentation i wont fucking allow it#okay. i must go to do my thing goodbye *swooshes my dress and disappears in a cunty manner*
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hmhmm i think im gonna take a tumbly break until october ive decided ☆
#i think my lack of meds is kinda fucking me up and i cant get a refill until assumedly oct when i go to the doc so#yeah#ive been ok w keeping up my schoolwork and Kind of my chores and the like but i feel like im slowly slipping so#it will be good for me to minimize distractions for now#its just two weeks so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#assuming i dont fall off the face of the earth like last time <- has disappeared for over a year#anyways thats it ermmm anyone who has my discord is free to msg me i suppose . . . ? im gonna be logging out of tumblr so ☆#oh and if uu rlly rlly want my discord for some reason its in my rentry lol#that is all !!! goodbye for now o7
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taking esr from us….something real ugly will rise out of me…im sure if it
#all these transfer rumors have been so evil and darksided but THIS?#no. they’ll make a real enemy out of me#I don’t understand this at all these all sound like genuinely idiotic decisions like what is going on behind the scenes fr#imagine if they fumbled fábio…I’d disappear…see now I’m thinking about a bunch of terrible transfers…#and why is everyone but 5 being linked w away from this club? presence benefits no one. just makes this worse im soooo. goodbye.
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okay im getting up. im getting up. im getting up.
#goodbye day#clean. shouldn't go get food probably because launch w people tomorrow before we see the stupid dnd movie#which is all unnecessary amounts of money but i haven't seen then for a couple of weeks and im becoming a hermit#need to mealplan and cook because so much of my paycheck just disappears into food now#groceries expensive takeout expensive existing expensive#lost so many hours to sleep today hhhhh#at least need to caffeine or im gonna be useless and it has to be commissions tonight#got stuff to make soup but im too wiped to stand there and make soup much less all the prep#it's not even that much im just barely human#not knife wielding quality#okay ill put on pants and get a sandwich and try not to cry abt it
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tornadoes aren't more important than you
tyler owens (twisters) x reader
words: 1.5k
warnings: pregnant!reader, married!reader, established relationship
“be careful, yeah?” you place your hands on tylers cheeks, tilting his head down to look you in the eye.
“i wish you could come with me.” tyler sighs, leaning in and pressing his forehead against yours, his cowboy hat tipping upwards and off his head, clattering onto the hardwood.
“i know.” you miss it. the excitement, the fear, the anticipation of storm chasing. “but i don't think the baby would like me getting whipped around.”
tyler chuckles and presses his hands to your stomach, fully showing now that you've reached six months.
“im gonna be safe and im gonna be back home to you real soon.” tyler kisses you deeply, arms wrapping around your waist to pull you in close.
“uh, not to interrupt-”
“you are interrupting, boone.” tyler looks up at him as he stands in the open doorway, trucks filling the driveway.
“we were just finishing saying goodbye.” you raise to your tiptoes and give tyler one more peck.
“i love you.” you whisper against your husbands lips.
“i love you, baby.”
“ew.” boones nose scrunches up, still somehow not used to seeing you kiss despite being married for a year now.
“you stay safe too boone.” you point at him, watching as they head out the door and pile in the trucks.
you wave goodbye to everyone, tyler getting in last as he tips his hat he grabbed off the floor towards you, a silent promise to come back home.
you sigh as you watch them pull away, hand stroking over your belly as the trucks disappear in a cloud of dirt. “it's okay.” you whisper to the baby, but it's mostly for yourself. “daddy will be back.”
--
“hey.” you answer the phone with a smile on your face. “i watched the live stream.”
“pretty fucking cool huh?”
“pretty cool that you let boone drive the rig.” you chuckle, knowing tyler did that specifically for you, to show you that he can let others take the lead, let them be the one to drive into the tornado.
“how's my baby doing?” tyler asks, ignoring your teasing.
“which one?” you giggle, laying a hand on your stomach. “im good, baby is kicking a lot though.”
“put me on speaker.” tyler requests. you roll your eyes but still turn the volume up and hold the speaker up to your belly.
“it's daddy.” tylers voice is half strict and half high baby voice. “you better stop giving your mama grief when im not there to help her. behave for just a bit longer, buddy.”
“i hope he listens to you.” you shake your head, bringing the phone back up. “how's the storms looking for tomorrow?”
“tracking a couple cells.” tyler confirms. “im coming home friday no matter what they look like over the weekend.”
“mhm, sure.” you roll your eyes, although you don't doubt it. now that you're pregnant, tyler is even more protective over you. he knows you can handle anything, but that doesn't mean he's going to force you to do it all on your own.
“i will. already miss that pretty face baby.” his country twang is music to your ears as you hum out.
“i miss you too. miss kissing your lips.”
“you're killing me, sugar.” tyler groans. you hear dani shouting something in the background.
“i-”
“you gotta go. i know. love you.”
“love you more, darling.”
--
you have tylers livestream on in the background as you clean the house, feeling the urge to nest and get everything prepared before you're too pregnant to do anything, and tyler certainly wouldn't let you lift a finger when hes home.
you always dreamt of a beautiful old farmhouse like this all your life, but before you could move in tyler insisted on building a proper storm shelter to keep you safe.
you unpack some of the boxes of things you bought for the baby's room, sticking to yellows and oranges to keep everything brightly colored and cohesive, in contrast to the darkening sky.
you're not right in the path of tornados, but they have been known to swing up and hit the closest town every couple years.
you know the cloudy sky is just a result of all the activity further to the west where your husband currently is.
you look back to your phone, watching for a moment as his handsome face turns to look out the window. you can see the reflection of the twister in his eyes, a mix of awe struck and fear that any man within his right mind would feel.
“god-” you look up to the ceiling. you're not the biggest believer, but growing up in the south has you always reverting to whispering a prayer. “keep my husband safe.”
--
you let out a yawn as you adjust, not knowing for sure the sound that woke you up until you hear it again, your cellphone vibrating on the nightstand.
“hello?” your voice is groggy as you answer. you didn't bother to look at the contact name, there's only one person who would be calling you at this hour. “tyler?”
“baby, get to the storm shelter right now.”
“what?” the words have you instantly awake, hopping to your feet and looking out the window of your second story bedroom. “it looks fine.”
“im- just trust me! are you going?” you can hear the nerves in tyler's voice as well as the roaring of his truck no doubt speeding down the road.
“yes.” you confirm, grabbing one of tylers sweatshirts and slipping it over your head before finding a pair of shoes. “im going down the stairs right now.”
the second you step outside, you can feel the shift in the air.
“im tracking it on the data. we reported it but they said it's not on their maps as if our equipment isn't ten years newer.”
you listen to tylers rant as you round the house to pull open the storm shelter doors. it's not a glamorous area, small and tight but completely concrete and filled with a couple boxes of supplies.
“im in the shelter, ty.” you reassure him as you close the latch. “im safe. the babys safe.”
“it's building.” tyler says, no doubt looking at the radar or getting reports fed to him from boone. “im coming home to you, ill be there in two hours. fuck it, make it an hour and a half.”
“it's wednesday.” you state, although its just after midnight so technically thursday. “you said you weren't coming home until friday.”
“that was before a torando was gonna hit you. baby, i don't want you to go through this alone when you're pregnant.”
“ill be fine.” you reassure tyler. “but if you want to come back and make sure, you're more than welcome. like i said, i miss your lips.”
“gonna give you lots of kisses to make up for being gone.”
“i won't argue with that.” your phone beeps and you pull it away from your ear to realize you're losing service. “i think we are going to disconnect soon.”
“stay on as long as you possibly can.”
you try, but your phone beeps again and the call drops out.
sitting alone in the darkness heightens your other senses, feeling the cold air sneaking in through every available crack as your ears pick up the sound of the wind roaring.
you close your eyes and press your hands against your stomach, softly singing a nursery rhyme that your mother sung to you when you were a baby, your eyes sliding closed as you fall back asleep.
--
you're startled awake suddenly as the door rips open, only for tyler to quickly enter.
“is it over?” you ask, standing up and wobbling slightly. tyler grabs your hips, holding you up and looking at you up and down, his eyes examining you. you watch the stress and fear and anxiety melt away to be replaced with softness and love.
“it's over.” he confirms, tugging you in close.
“the house?”
“a busted window and a downed tree blocking the driveway. that's all.” tyler presses his nose into your hair, inhaling the scent.
“wasn't bad then.” you wrap your arms around his waist, enjoying the warm embrace.
“no, but i got so fucking scared knowing you were here all alone.” tyler pulls away only to help you up the stairs, hating seeing you confined to the shelter even if it is to keep you safe.
“i just… i can't do this while you're pregnant. i can't leave you here, or anywhere, alone knowing something could happen to you.”
tyler pulls his phone out of his pocket and navigates to his youtube channel, going live and waiting for a couple users to join.
he holds the camera up so he can see himself and you, his arm coming to wrap around your shoulders.
“as you folks know, my lovely wife here is pregnant with our first child. as much as i love tornado wrangling, i love my girl more. for the next six months im going to be taking a step back, but don't unsubscribe, boone is taking over to keep the excitement coming.”
he doesn't even say goodbye, simply ending the livestream, knowing one of his followers surely recorded it to spread the news around.
“ty, you didn't have to do that.”
“yes, i did.” tyler bends down to lift you up, carrying you across the threshold of your house just like he did the day you got married. “im gonna be with you throughout everything. tornados aren't more important than you.”
#this is purely self insert#like theres truly no reason for me to publish this when its just my fantasy#tyler owens fic#tyler owens fanfic#tyler owens fanction#tyler owens x reader#tyler owens x you#tyler owens x y/n#tyler owens x oc#tyler owens imagine#tyler owens drabble#tyler owens one shot#tyler owens blurb#tyler owens twisters
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── ❝ ꒰ 𝑂𝑁𝐿𝑌 𝐵𝑂𝑈𝐺𝐻𝑇 𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑆 𝐷𝑅𝐸𝑆𝑆 𝑆𝑂 𝑌𝑂𝑈 𝐶𝑂𝑈𝐿𝐷 𝑇𝐴𝐾𝐸 𝐼𝑇 𝑂𝐹𝐹 .ᐟㅤ ៸៸ ﹙ 심재윤 ﹚ ᶻ𐰁
GENRE ៸៸ suggestive ៸ b2l ៸ oneshot ﹔ SYPNOSIS┆in which you and jake can’t ignore your feelings for each other anymore.ᐟㅤ ꒰ WORD COUNT﹕1559 ꒱── 𝓦ARNING(S) not proofread ៸ very suggestive!! ៸ skinship ៸ . ݁ ✦ ݁ . ⊱ LIBRARY . . . ﹕LUNA 💭 —ngl this was so freaky of me im sorry!!(✿ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈) ݁𖥔 ݁˖
YOU NEVER THOUGHT THINGS WITH JAKE SIM COULD BE ANYTHING MORE THAN A FRIENDSHIP.
well, maybe you did—maybe you've thought about it more than you’d care to admit.
but for so long, you've kept those feelings locked away, buried under the bond of being "best friends."
you've known jake for years, seen him at his best and his worst.
you've laughed until you cried at his terrible jokes, stayed up late watching movies, even fallen asleep on his shoulder more times than you can count.
for the longest time, you convinced yourself that what you felt for jake was the kind of love you reserved for a friend—a really good friend, but nothing more.
lately, though, it's been different.
it's not just the little glances he gives you when he thinks you aren't paying attention, or the way his hand seems to linger on your lower back when he hugs you goodbye. ── 𝘔𝘖𝘙𝘌 𝘜𝘕𝘋𝘌𝘙 𝘛𝘏𝘌 𝘊𝘜𝘛 .ᐟㅤ
no, it's the way your heart speeds up when he's near, the way your pulse races when his voice drops low, just for you.
the way your breath catches when his eyes flicker to your lips during a conversation, even if he doesn't kiss you.
the lines have blurred—lines you swore to yourself wouldn't cross, and tonight, they feel like they're disappearing altogether.
you're at one of jake's usual parties, something casual with a few friends, but you can hardly focus on the conversations going on around you.
the music blasts softly in the background, and you're very aware of the dress you chose for the evening.
it's unlike anything you'd normally wear in front of him-delicate, fitted in all the right places, with the perfect amount of skin that makes you feel bold.
it's a quiet statement, one you're hoping he'll notice.
and oh, he's noticed.
from the moment you walked through the door, his eyes had been on you—an intensity behind them that you haven't seen before.
every time you catch him looking, your heart flutters, and you wonder if tonight will finally be the night when everything changes.
when the night winds down, and everyone else says their goodbyes, it's just you and jake left.
the silence in his apartment feels heavy, filled with the weight of unspoken words.
you sit on the couch, trying to play it cool, but you can't help the way your mind is racing, wondering if he's feeling what you're feeling right now.
jake stands in the doorway of the kitchen, watching you, and for a moment, neither of you says anything.
the tension is thick, you could probably cut it with a knife.
"you're quiet tonight," jake finally says, his voice softer than usual, his eyes still on you in a way that makes your skin tingle.
you shrug, trying to act casual even though you're anything but. "just... thinking."
"about what?" he asks, walking over to the couch and sitting down beside you.
not just beside you—closer than usual, his knee brushes against yours, and the contact sends a jolt of electricity through you.
you swallow, trying to keep your composure.
but the air feels too thick, too charged. "you..me, us."
jake's brow furrows slightly, his eyes searching your face for answers. "what about us?"
you take a deep breath, knowing you're standing on the edge of something that could either change everything or break it.
"do you ever think about... crossing that line? the one we've been avoiding for a while?"
his gaze sharpens at your words, and for a moment, he says nothing, his silence speaking volumes.
his hand comes up to rest on the back of the couch behind you, fingers lightly grazing your shoulder.
it's such a simple gesture, but the touch feels loaded, like he's testing the waters, seeing how far he can go.
"every day," jake admits quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. "i think about it all the time.”
your heart skips a beat at his confession, and suddenly, it's like the doors have finally opened.
the tension that's been simmering between you for months rushes to the surface, impossible to ignore anymore.
"i don't want to keep pretending," he continues, his eyes locked on yours now, filled with an intensity that makes your stomach twist in anticipation.
"i don't want you like a best friend."
his words hit you like a wave, and you can't breathe, can't think.
it's what you've been wanting to hear, but now that it's out in the open, it feels all too big to grasp all at once.
"i... i don't either," you manage to whisper, your voice shaky and nervous. "i haven't for a long time."
the confession hangs in the air between you, heavy and real.
jake's fingers move to your chin, gently lifting your face so you're forced to meet his gaze.
there's something vulnerable in his eyes, like he's laying all his cards on the table, waiting for you to do the same.
"you drive me crazy, you know that?" his thumb brushes softly over your cheek, the touch sending sparks down your spine.
"every time i'm with you, i have to stop myself from... from doing this."
before you can ask what he means, jake leans in, his lips hovering inches from yours.
the anticipation makes your head spin, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for him to close the distance.
and when he does, it feels like the world stops.
his lips are soft, hesitant at first, as if he's giving you the chance to pull away.
but you don't—instead, you lean into him, your hands finding their way to his chest, clutching the fabric of his shirt as if to steady yourself.
the kiss deepens, slow and consuming, like both of you are finally letting go of everything you’ve been holding back.
jake's hand moves to your waist, pulling you closer until you're practically sitting in his lap.
his fingers trace patterns on your skin, burning through the fabric of your dress, and all you can think about is how much you've wanted this-how long you've been waiting for him.
when you finally pull apart, breathless and flushed, jake rests his forehead against yours, his breathing ragged.
there's a look in his eyes that you've never seen before, something raw and filled with want.
"you're all i think about," he murmurs, his voice raspy. "every time i'm with you, it's like i forget how to pretend."
your heart races as you take in his words, and you know there's no going back now.
the truth is out there, hanging between you, and you're both too far gone to stop.
"i bought this dress for you, you know," you say softly, your voice trembling with anticipation as you run your hands down his chest. "i didn't buy it for no reason."
jake's brow furrows slightly in confusion, but the way his eyes darken with understanding makes your breath hitch.
"what do you mean?" he asks, though you can tell he's starting to piece it together.
your fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt as you pull him closer, your lips brushing against his ear as you whisper,
"i only bought this dress so you could take it off."
jake's breath hitches, and for a moment, everything feels suspended in the tension between you.
his hand tightens on your waist, and when he pulls back to look at you, there's a fire in his eyes that makes your skin tingle with excitement.
"you're killing me," he mutters, but there's a teasing grin on his face as his fingers trail down your arm, grazing the edge of the dress.
you smile, leaning in to press a kiss to his jaw, your lips lingering on his skin as you whisper, "then do something about it."
jake doesn't need to be told twice.
in one swift motion, he lifts you onto his lap, his hands gripping your waist as his lips crash into yours again.
the kiss is different this time-deeper, more desperate, like he's making up for all the time you've both spent pretending.
his hands move to the zipper of your dress, fingers fumbling slightly as he pulls it down, the sound loud in the quiet of the room.
your heart pounds in your chest as his hands roam your body, every touch igniting a fire in your veins.
the dress slips off your shoulders, and jake pulls back for a moment to look at you, his eyes dark with desire.
"you're beautiful," he murmurs, his voice low and filled with awe.
you feel a blush rise to your cheeks, but you don't have time to be self-conscious.
jake's lips are back on yours, his hands sliding up your bare back as he pulls you closer, your bodies pressed together in a way that makes you forget everything else.
it's been building to this for so long-the stolen glances, the lingering touches, the unspoken words.
now, it's all out in the open, and neither of you are holding back anymore.
as you fall back against the couch, jake hovering over you, his eyes filled with nothing but want and love, you realize that this was always where you were meant to end up—with him.
and tonight, everything that's been unsaid will finally be spoken.
© won4kiss 2024
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៸៸ ❝ PLEASE REBLoG AND LiKE .ᐟㅤ 💌
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episode eight: the battle of starcourt
He fights with it, tries desperately not to let it fall, all while his resume hangs from his mouth. “Shit! Oh, Fast Times! Ever heard of it? Top three for me, Keith.” Robin laughs and Steve turns the cardboard cutout to you, wiggling his eyebrows. “Own any red bikinis?” You flick his forehead, though you laugh as well. “In your dreams.” “I can sleep right now and find out–” “I will flick you again.” “A kiss is preferred, but whatever.”
Summary: jonathan becomes a certified surgeon, hopper returns and is oddly sentimental (wonder what that could mean !), you and dustin show off your musical theater talents, the mind flayer becomes a track star, fireworks become weapons, and really a lot just happens so suddenly it gives you whiplash. dont worry though, the rest of your summer involves painful goodbyes and the scary realization that youre growing up. absolutely disgusting. but at least steve gets to kiss you whenever now, so hooray for that ! side note: you keep making promises to people, surely there wont be narrative foreshadowing as a result !
Rating: general, violence and swearing
Warnings: blood, swearing, major character death, graphic depictions of violence, fem!reader, use of y/n
Words: 21.2k (ouch)
Before you swing in: this was my magnum opus. truly. so so so much happens in this chapter, this episode is INSANE. it took me a while, the scenes were hard and complex, but im happy with the final results :) ive been waiting a long time to write this ending, to set up the strings for later in season 4 <3 i sincerely hope this chapter is all yall have wanted. if theres any glaring typos, pls ignore because its 21.2k words and im weak from rereading it. anyways, i have a sneaky lil link right here that will make sense at the end of the chapter (spoiler alert: it's a mixtape jonathan makes for bug). enjoy !
-
El’s screams tear out of her body. She writhes in pain, sobs claw out of her throat. It’s unbearable to watch, the sight of her in immeasurable pain. It breaks your heart.
No one knows what to do.
Mike thrashes in your arms still. He tries to escape your hold so that he can cover his body with El’s. Take away her pain somehow. But you won’t let him. You know that it hurts him to see her this way, but his panic will only drive El’s panic further.
“What is that?” Disgust litters Erica’s face as she stares at the moving creature within El’s leg. Gently you push the girl away, not wanting to crowd El too much. She needs space to breathe.
“There’s something in her leg,” Mike sneers into your face as he fights against you again. He’s furious, he’s overwhelmed, he just wants to help. “Let go!”
Your arms tighten around the boy. He isn’t in the right state of mind. Frantic, you look to your left and start forming a plan. “Jonathan, my switchblade is in my left back pocket. Grab it.” He stares at you, unsure what to do, and you raise your voice into a yell. “Grab it.”
Jonathan jumps at the command and his hand disappears behind you. You feel him find the weapon and pull it out. He holds it in front of you, offering it, but you don’t accept it. “Go and disinfect it. There’s a gas stove where you found us. Heat up the blades so that we can–” you swallow as nausea fills you. “We–we have to cut it out of her leg.”
The moment Jonathan is gone, you turn your attention to Mike and Steve. You try to keep your voice leveled, try to contain the blinding panic that screams in your head. El needs you right now. Swallowing again, you start to speak to them. “I need you guys to talk to El. Keep her awake.”
“Right, okay.” Mike nods, and you finally release him. He hovers over El, his voice is gentle as he tries to calm her. “Hey, stay awake, okay?”
You tug Steve towards El’s legs so that he can help you move her into a better position. “Get her onto her side. Mike, put her head in your lap.”
Both boys do as they’re told. Everyone watches, and Robin tries to make light of the situation. She rambles about a girl from her soccer team who once broke her leg. How the bone had ripped clean through her skin. The story makes you shiver, and Steve sees the discomfort. “Robin, hey. You’re not helping.”
“I’m sorry.”
Jonathan returns, out of breath. “Okay. Alright, El?” He looks down at the girl. Tries to steady his breathing. “This is gonna hurt like hell, okay?”
El whimpers out that she understands, and you take hold of her hand. “Sweetheart, you need to brace yourself. I promise it will be over soon.”
“I’ll be fast, but I need you to stay real still. Here,” Jonathan hands a wooden spoon to Mike. “You’re gonna want to bite down on this, okay?”
Teeth bared, El clenches her teeth around the spoon. Her body braces for what’s about to come. Kneeling next to her, you angle your body over hers and pin her arms down with your hands. You look at Mike, ordering him to do the same. “Hold her shoulders. Don’t let her go, no matter what.”
He pales, but swallows deeply and nods. When Mike is in position, you signal to Jonathan to start cutting. “Do it.”
“Okay,” Jonathan inhales. The knife you’ve given him shakes as he holds it over El’s wound. He’s fucking terrified, but he knows it’s the only way. Exhaling, he cuts into her flesh. Blood pours from the wound and El’s screams tear from her chest.
Everyone makes a sound of disgust and horror. Your own stomach lurches at the sight of Jonathan cutting into the leg. The image, the way El’s body convulses, the screams she releases, it’s all too much. You don’t feel yourself shaking until Steve guides your head into the nook of his shoulder, shielding you.
“Thank you,” your breathing is shaky. You aren’t even sure if he’s heard you, but Steve nods and his hand rubs up and down your back. He’s doing whatever he can to help, being the solid surface you need to lean upon. Lending you the strength you need to hold El down and save her.
You hear your knife glance against the ground, followed by El’s scream becoming deafening. Unable to stop yourself, you pull away from Steve to look at what’s happening. When you do, you almost gag. Jonathan’s fingers are now in El’s leg, digging underneath the flesh and muscle to find whatever the hell is in there. A horrible squelching sound fills the air. Faintly you think you can hear Will crying behind you.
Jonathan struggles, digs deeper into the leg, but it only seems to be making everything worse. El twists and contorts beneath you, in agonizing pain. Her screams only intensify. A tear from your eye lands on her shirt, and you force yourself to hold her down despite how desperately you want to end it.
“Goddamn it!” Jonathan can’t find it. He can’t find whatever the hell is in El’s leg. It keeps moving the moment he thinks he has it. Everything is slick from blood.
“No!” El spits out the wooden spoon, her voice raw from screaming. “Stop it!”
You can’t stomach her pain any longer. The moment she pleads for it to stop, you move off of El and push Jonathan away from her. Nancy helps, touches his shoulder to alert him as well. The moment she has the room to, El sits herself up. “I can do it.
“Do what, El?” You ask, though you think you know anyways.
She breathes heavily. Tears flow freely down her face. She’s sitting down, one of her knees is pressed against her chest. The injured leg remains flat on the ground, her hand outstretched above it. Static, the one you always feel when El uses her powers, surrounds you. There’s a low hum, she grunts and screams, and yet her hand remains steady. You rub her back, offering her all the strength you can give her, in awe despite the poor timing of it.
To have the strength to expel a foreign object from your body. You can’t imagine it.
El releases one final long, harrowing scream. The lights flicker, the windows behind you rattle violently. You only just barely manage to cover Dustin and the kids from the shards of glass before they explode. At the same time, a small, writhing creature shoots from El’s leg. It stalls in the air, hovering in front of her face as she continues to scream. The creature is no bigger than the size Dart had been when Dustin first found him. The idea that it had been buried in El’s leg makes you feel ill.
With the last of her energy, El flings the creature across the room. It lands with a sickening thud on the floor, before it starts to move. You watch in horror as it scurries away, releasing its own screech, until Hopper’s boot crashes down upon it, killing it.
You’ve never been happier to see that cranky son of a bitch.
Joyce stands behind him and you whimper pathetically when you see her. You miss your own mother. It’s been days since you’ve last seen her. You’re more homesick than you’ve ever been before.
Alongside Joyce and Hopper is a man you’ve never seen before. He has glasses and a beard. As you study him, Jonathan makes a surprised sound. “Murray?”
“You know him?”
Jonathan nods at you. “He’s the detective Nance and I visited last year.”
“He’s insane.” Nancy says, though there’s a nostalgic smile on her face.
Hopper steps forward, investigating the scene. Glass crunches beneath his boots. He stops in front of you and El. He looks down at you. “Always at the scene of the crime, huh?”
“Yeah,” you blow hair out of your face. “Can’t seem to ever stop myself.” Then, finally noticing his aggressively bright and floral shirt that he’s wearing, you tilt your head to the side. “Nice shirt, by the way. I like the color on you. You’ve been direly needing some color in your life.”
Dustin snorts and El manages a tired smile. Hopper rolls his eyes at you, though you can tell it’s more from fondness rather than annoyance like it usually is. You watch as his eyes drift towards Joyce, uncharacteristically shy. “Thanks, kid.”
“Anytime, old man.”
–
“The Mind Flayer, it built this monster in Hawkins, to stop El, to kill her and pave a way into our world.”
You sit on the fountain’s edge. Dustin is next to you, Steve leans against you on the other side. Mike’s words surround you.
He explains what he and the others have been dealing with while you’ve been gone. Innocent people have been getting possessed and turned into chemicalized substances. Their bodies melting together, conjoining to create a monster meant to kill El. With every detail Mike remembers, your stomach twists uncomfortably. It doesn’t sound real. It sounds like a thing from nightmares.
And somehow Billy has become the face of it.
The last time you saw him, he had been a shell of who he used to be. He had been in pain. Obvious pain. Sweat had run down his flushed skin and his eyes had a frost in them unlike anything you had ever seen before. Instead of helping him, instead of telling anyone about this, you had abandoned Billy.
“How big is this thing?” Hopper asks, shifting so that El can rest more comfortably against him.
Jonathan sighs. “It’s… It’s big. Real big. Thirty feet, at least.”
“You’ve seen it?” Your eyes draw to the bruise on his forehead. The pained noise he made when you hugged him still rings in your ears.
“We’ve had a rough night.” Nancy whispers, eyes downcast.
“It sorta destroyed Hopper’s cabin.” Lucas looks up at the chief, a poorly feigned apologetic smile on his face. “Sorry.”
Steve interjects now. He asks questions, tries to make sure he understands. As he speaks with the group, your head falls onto his shoulder. Your head spins. Only hours ago you were dealing with Russians and national emergencies. Now, you and Steve try to wrap your heads around the idea of a giant human goo creature wreaking havoc on Hawkins.
Which, according to Max, is still very much alive.
But that doesn’t stop Will from trying to help. “But if we close the gate again–”
“We cut the brain off from the body.”
“And kill it.” Lucas finishes for Max. “Theoretically.”
It sounds so simple, but you’ve been here before.
You’ve heard this conversation already; you were standing in the Byers’ dining room. Steve had been next to you, just like he is now, and Jonathan had been on your other side. The people surrounding you were the same, only now Robin and Will join. That November, the conversation had terrified you. Closing the gate. Killing the Mind Flayer and destroying its army.
It had been the exact same conversation. And it terrifies you still, now. Only this time the fear is accompanied by an emptiness.
You’ve been here before. It hadn’t been enough.
“How many more times are we going to kill it?” Your head remains pressed against Steve. Your eyes don’t lift from the ground. Exhaustion sags your body. “We thought we already killed the Mind Flayer. We went through hell and back to close the gate, only for it to be opened again not even a year later. By another country. I mean,” laughter crawls out of your throat. “Who’s to say that they won’t just open the gate again? They’ve already done it once–”
“Loverboy over here,” The bearded man from earlier, Murray, suddenly appears and slaps the back of Jonathan’s head. The man has a mad smile on his face, the kind that tells you he’s an insane genius. After Jonathan shoves him away, Murray stops in front of you. He looks down, a curious glint in his eyes. “He told me you were a ray of sunshine. Gotta be honest. I’m not really getting a real sunshine vibe from you.”
Steve subtly shifts your body so that he’s in front of you. His eyes are narrowed, body tense. “What’s that in your hands?”
Murray seems to now remember what he interrupted the group for. He clutches the pieces of paper in his hands, waves them in the air. “Ah. These, my perfectly coiffed haired friend, are blueprints.”
“That’s just a poorly done drawing of squares and lines.” You squint at the papers. They’re no better than the map Mike had scribbled to navigate the tunnels last year.
“Seriously,” Murray turns back to Jonathan again. “I thought she was supposed to be the nice one.”
You open your mouth to argue, not at all liking whatever this random man is insinuating, but Hopper steps forward first. “Just start talking.”
He sighs, but agrees. Motioning everyone to follow, Murray guides the group to a nearby table so that he can lay his drawings out for everyone to see. “Okay, this is what Alexei called ‘the hub’.” Murray points to the center of the first drawing. “Now, the hub takes us to the vault room.”
“Okay, where’s the gate?” Hopper hovers over him, attentive.
“Right here.” Murray now points to a random box, far from where you know the gate actually is. You bite your lip, unsure if you should speak up just yet. “I don’t know the scale on this, but I think it’s fairly close to the vault room. Maybe fifty feet or so.”
You snort obnoxiously loud, getting everyone’s attention. “You’re so wrong that it physically pains me.”
“I’m sorry?” Murray gives you an odd look. When Jonathan and Nancy showed up on his doorstep last year, the two of them had nothing but great things to say about you. Jonathan had waxed poetry about you while Nancy had sat at the dinner table, resentful. Now, meeting you, Murray is really struggling to understand where that all came from.
“It’s more like five hundred feet.” Erica says. When she sees Murray’s exasperated expression, she can’t help but laugh at the old man. “What, you’re just gonna waltz in there like it’s commie Disneyland or something?”
“And who are you?”
“Erica Sinclair. And who are you?”
“Murray… Bauman.”
“Listen, Mr. Bunman.” You have to stifle a laugh into Steve’s shoulder. You love Erica, you really do. “I’m not trying to tell you how to do things, but I’ve been down in that shithole for twenty-four hours. And with all due respect, you do what this man tells you, you’re all gonna die.”
“I’m sorry, why is this four year old speaking to me?”
You slide off the fountain’s edge and stand. Whoever this guy is, you don’t like his snippy attitude. “She’s ten, actually, and she’s right.”
“Yeah, you bald bastard!” Lucas reprimands her, but she doubles down. “Just the facts!”
While you enjoy her quips, you gently grab Erica’s shoulders and place her behind you. There isn’t time for her to make a grown man cry. “We went through hell down there. It won’t be as easy as walking fifty feet. The place is huge.”
“They’re right.” Dustin speaks up. “You’re all gonna die, but you don’t have to. Excuse me, may I?” Even before Murray has consented, your brother is already grabbing the blueprints. He sits down and starts explaining. “See this room here? This is a storage facility. There’s a hatch in here that feeds into their underground ventilation system.”
“It’s how we accidentally got in.” You add, figuring any extra information could help.
“Wait, you accidentally broke into a secret Russian lair?” Mike tries to hide it, but you can see that he’s impressed. You know that once this is all over, he’ll grill you for details later.
“No, we thought it’d be fun to get tortured by commies on the fourth of July.” Steve points to his swollen eye. “Yes, Wheeler. It was an accident.”
“Guys!” Dustin shouts. When he has everyone’s attention again, he sighs. “Jesus. Anyways, these vents will lead you to the base of the weapon. It’s a bit of a maze down there, but between me, Y/N, and Erica, we can show you the way.”
Hopper stares down at the three of you, unamused. “You can show us the way?”
Dustin is about to agree, but you cover his mouth with your hand. “Yes, I can show you the way. The kids can stay here, but I remember everything from when we were down there. If you want all the hero glory, then fine. Fight some Russians. But I can be your navigator.”
“No.” Hopper, Steve, Dustin, and Jonathan say at the same time.
You roll your eyes at all of them. “Okay, I was only talking to Hopper. The rest of you,” you glare at your brother and the two teens next to him. “Aren’t a part of this conversation.”
“There isn’t a conversation to be had, kid.” Hopper scoffs at you. He doesn’t want to hear whatever you’re about to say. He won’t let you back down there again. From the state Steve is in, Hopper doesn’t even want Joyce coming with him. “You’re not going. End of discussion.”
“You don’t seriously expect me to let you walk into a death trap, right? I mean, I know we argue a lot, but you can’t be that dumb.” Hopper has started to walk away now, trying to put an end to the conversation, but you follow him anyways. “Listen to me!” He ignores you, doesn’t turn around. Instead, Hopper starts gathering bullets as he picks up a shotgun from one of the guards on the ground. Groaning, you continue to chase him.
You don’t care how annoying you’re being. You’ll nag him until your last dying breath. If he doesn’t want you getting hurt, then he has to understand that you don’t want him getting hurt either. “Hopper, I’m serious. El…” You look at the girl, who is far behind the two of you now as she rests near the fountain. Your voice grows thick. A wave of emotions rush over you, seeing her. She’s so small. She’s still just a kid, despite the power that lies within her. “She needs you. You–you can’t get hurt.”
“And I won’t.”
“You don’t know that,” you grab the man’s shirt, but he tries to walk anyways. You plant your feet on the ground and grit your teeth. He’s frustratingly strong. “Please, just–you’re her father. You–you can’t leave her–” You stumble over your words, try to think of how to convince him. There has to be a way, a middle ground. Isn’t he the one who taught El what compromise means?
In your nagging midst, you overhear Dustin and the party all catch up. Talk about how they missed one another. It’s a sweet reunion, seeing them come together again after being separated for so long; your boys are together again. It feels like a lifetime ago where they were all together on Weathertop hill. Seeing them together again, it hits you.
The walkies. Cerebro.
“What if I could still communicate with you from above?” You shout, frantic. Hopper stops walking. He still doesn’t look at you, but he indicates that you have his attention. Taking a deep breath, you don’t waste any time. “We have walkies. Dustin, all the kids. It’s how they communicate with one another. Always have. What if… what if I give you directions using them? That way, you’ll fulfill your annoying need to be a hero while I fulfill my annoying need to protect everyone.”
Your words come rushing out, messy and jumbled, but Hopper seems to understand. He’s quiet, mulls what you’ve said over and over again in his head. He inhales, closes his eyes, and then exhales agonizingly slow. When he opens his eyes to look at you, he’s resolved. “You’re really annoying, you know that?”
A relieved smile graces your face. Knowing you’ve gotten through to Hopper, you finally release his shirt. You straighten it back out, wipe some dirt off of it. It really is a good shirt, one you know was almost definitely purchased for a woman named Joyce Byers. “It adds to my charm.”
Hopper chuckles, shakes his head, before walking over to where your brother stands with the others. He fishes a walkie from his back pocket, tosses a spare one to Dustin. “Hey, heads up. Your sister came up with a shockingly genius compromise. You guys can navigate, just from someplace safe.”
Dustin sighs. “It’s not that simple.”
“The signal won’t reach.” Erica clarifies for him.
You motion at them to explain faster. “But…”
“But,” Dustin quickly explains your idea. “We’d need something with a high enough frequency band to relay with the Russians’ radio tower. But for that to work, you need someone who has both seen their comms room and has access to a super-powered handcrafted radio–”
“Dustin,” you hit his shoulder, urging him to get to the point already. “Just tell him about Cerebro.”
“I was getting there! Look, we have one already situated at the highest point in Hawkins.” Your brother shakes his head. “If you need us to navigate, we got you. But we need a head start… and a car.”
“Hey, chief.” You stand beside Hopper now, grinning ear to ear. “Don’t you have a car?”
He stares past you, and the rage in his eyes amuses you immensely. It’s taking everything within him not to start yelling, which only causes your shit eating grin to grow. You extend your arm, hold your hand out palm-facing upwards. This is the best day of your life. “Come on, give me the car keys, Hopper.”
Sucking his teeth, Hopper drops the car keys into your hand. “I hate you.”
Hopper stands in front of you, annoyance and irritability in his eyes as he stares at you, but you don’t care. A surge of warmth cascades through you instead. He listened. It means more to you than the man could ever know. Your arms find their way around him, surprising both you and Hopper, as you pull him into a hug. “Thank you for listening to me.”
“Yeah, well. Don’t make me regret it.” Hopper says, his voice rough. He clears his throat, allows his hand to pat your shoulder. He may not know what you’ve gone through, but he thinks he can understand the weight the history has left you. It’s the same weight that he carries every day. The guilt, the anger that follows it. He clears his throat again and pulls you off of him, keeping you at arm’s length. “Do me a favor, will you? Make sure El and the others are safe.”
You sniff, wipe away tears. You’re not sure why you’re crying. “I will, I promise. Good luck, old man.”
“Good luck, kid.” He hesitates, still holding your shoulders. His breath hitches and his eyes don’t leave yours. There’s something in them, almost a certain kindness that once reflected in your father’s eyes when you were younger. The gaze burns you at first, but you stare back at Hopper through it. After he seems to find what he’s looking for, Hopper swallows. He says what Joyce has always said about you; from his conversation with the woman back at Melvald’s. “You’re the best of them.”
More tears well in your eyes, but you wipe them away before he can tease you. Hopper releases you, shoves you in a playful manner, and you can’t help but laugh. It’s a warm moment. His words simmer on your skin. You’ve heard them before, you know what people say about you, but the words are different coming from Hopper.
Praise doesn’t come naturally to him. Words have always plagued him; the ones he has just told you hold a weight that’s even heavier than the guilt the two of you carry within yourselves. You’ve known Jim Hopper for three years now, but as you watch him walk over to El, soft smile still on his face from his conversation with you, you finally understand him.
–
Steve is waiting for you at the fountain, whispering quietly with Robin. The two of them stand off to the side, away from the others. He’s nervous, uncomfortable. He stands with his back away from Jonathan and Nancy, who are a few feet away talking to Murray. His arms are crossed over his chest and his fingers tap together in an anxious tick you’ve become familiar with.
The moment he sees you approaching, all the tension in Steve’s body melts away.
He grabs your hand the second you’re within reach. Pulling you into his chest, he kisses the top of your head. “Any updates, angel?”
You hum against him, allowing yourself a moment to bask in his warmth. It’s been a long day. It’ll be an even longer night. “You know Weathertop hill?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Good.” You place Hopper’s keys into Steve’s hand. “You’re driving us, then.”
Robin points at Jonathan, who sneaks glances at the three of you. “Define ‘us’. Because, no offense, he seems nice and all, but he keeps looking over at you like a lost puppy and it’s making me uncomfortable.”
“Be nice, he’s still my best friend.” Flicking her forehead, you silently scold Robin. “And it’s just going to be the three of us with Dustin and Erica. Jonathan and Nancy are taking the rest of the kids to Murray’s bunker. He’s just… He’s worried. Probably wants to make sure he says goodbye to me before we leave.”
Robin makes a confused face, reminding you that she’s new to all of this. That she hasn’t had to say goodbye to her loved ones every year with the fear of them not returning. You sigh. “It’s… Kinda a tradition, at this point. A final goodbye before all hell breaks loose.”
“How many times do you guys almost die on a weekly basis?”
Steve snorts. “Depends on the month. November seems to be our worst one, though.”
“Astounding…”
You leave Steve to deal with Robin’s amazement on his own, though you laugh as you walk away. Ever since the events of Will’s disappearance, you’ve done everything you can to not think about what you’ve all been through. However, seeing the bewildered amazement on Robin’s face the more you reveal to her, you can’t help but laugh.
Jonathan sees you approaching him and Nancy and steps aside to make room for you. They’re still talking to Murray, although the man is more lecturing them than anything. He holds up a bunch of keys, explaining in great detail which one goes into specific locks. It’s dizzying trying to keep track of it all.
Secretly, you’re grateful that you’re going with Steve and the others. Easier key instructions.
“This one is for the second to last bottom lock–”
“Murray, can I cut in real quick?” You try to be polite about it, but truly you don’t care whether or not you have the man’s permission.
He glares at you. “Aren’t you already?”
“Good point!” You grab Nancy’s and Jonathan’s arms and pull them away with a wicked smile on your face. When you’ve dragged them far enough away from Murray, you wrap your arms around them both. Jonathan sinks into the unexpected embrace. Nancy stiffens. You try to ignore it. “Get to that old man’s bunker safely, please?”
“Of course, bug.” Jonathan has wrapped an arm around you. He closes his eyes, his fingers span across your back. “Stay at Weathertop, get to safety. Maybe even get some rest while you can.”
“I’ll try, bee.” Your laugh is wet. This will never get any easier.
Nancy shifts in your embrace, and for a moment you’re afraid she’ll pull away entirely, but instead she surprises you by wrapping an arm around you as well. Her chin is tucked against your neck, she still hasn’t melted into the embrace like Jonathan has, but she’s trying. Lips close to your ear, she whispers, “I’ll keep him safe.”
You suck in a breath. You hadn’t known how desperately you needed to hear Nancy’s reassurance, to hear her silent apology. Pulling away from them, you look at Jonathan and Nancy. “I love you. I love you both.”
Jonathan smiles, the same way he did the night you met him on the Wheeler’s porch. Nancy ducks her head down shyly, the same way she did the night she opened the door to let you into her home.
You squeeze their hands one last time before leaving to say goodbye to the others.
Lucas wishes you luck, Will hugs you as tight as ever, and El offers you a partial smile. She’s still recovering from whatever the monster did to her leg, so you brush some hair out of her face and kiss her head.
“Sucks you were down in hell this whole time. Could really go for a brownie right now.” Mike says, a light in his eyes as El’s head rests in his lap.
You stick your tongue out at him. “Sorry, couldn’t find a way to bake while getting chased by Russians with guns.”
“Lame.”
“Goodbye, Wheeler.”
Then you turn to Max, who has been silent this entire time. She hugs you tightly when she sees you. “He’ll be okay, right?”
Your body goes stiff. Somehow, in the midst of Hopper and the others, you had forgotten about Billy. How he’s infected. Flayed. It hasn’t escaped your notice that no one seems to want to bring the matter up, either. When it had been Will, everyone had wanted to make sure he wouldn’t die if the gate closed.
But no one has asked the same question for Billy.
Swallowing, you slowly reciprocate Max’s embrace. “We’ll… We’ll find a way. We always do.”
Though the words aren’t meant to be a lie, you can’t help but feel that you’re breaking an oath when you say them.
–
Steve hadn’t noticed what brand of car the keys belonged to at first. However, the moment his brain recognizes the iconic Cadillac logo on its keychain, he practically starts to drool. A fucking Cadillac.
It doesn’t take him long to round everyone up and drag you outside.
“I was saying goodbye to Joyce,” you grumble, struggling to keep up with Steve’s quick footsteps.
“It’s a Cadillac, Y/N!” Steve can almost feel the foam pooling around his mouth. His footsteps increase even more, his body vibrating at the knowledge that he gets to drive his dream car. His dad hadn’t wanted to buy him one, said that the BMW was more practical. Reliable. When Steve pushes the mall’s front door open and sees the beautiful, timeless car parked perfectly in front of him, he almost collapses. “Oh, man, now this…This is what I’m talkin’ about!”
“‘Toddfather’?” Robin points out the license plate and its horrible name.
You make a face, but Steve doesn’t let her ruin his moment. He’s ecstatic. This is arguably the best thing that has happened to him all day (besides maybe kissing you). For fuck’s sake, it’s a goddamn Cadillac. “Oh, screw Todd! Steve’s her daddy now.”
Steve hops into the car’s front seat like a little kid with a toy car. Meanwhile you, Robin, Dustin, and Erica retract your heads in disgust at what he’s just said. Robin looks at you, repulsed. “Did he just talk about himself in the third person?”
Erica follows up with her own creeped out question. “Did he just call himself daddy?”
“I’m choosing to ignore him right now.” You say to both of the girls, pressing a hand to your forehead as you walk to the car. There’s so much you don’t want to unpack with what Steve has said.
“You can’t ignore me, Y/N.” Steve leans over the center counsel and opens the passenger door for you. “We already established that I’m really annoying.”
“Just take us to Weathertop, please.” You buckle yourself in and make sure the kids have their seatbelts on as well. When you see that Robin has found herself in the middle seat, you snicker at her. She’s squished between Dustin and Erica, her knees are pressed uncomfortably to her chest.
“Why did I get stuck in the middle?” She complains.
Steve fixes one of the mirrors before revving the engine. As he pulls out of the mall’s parking lot, he offhandedly responds, “Passenger seat is reserved for girls I’m dating.”
Everyone in the backseat gags, and you blush furiously. You and Steve haven’t had the time to talk about your relationship. Or if there even is a relationship. But he’s just referred to you as the girl he’s dating. He kissed you yesterday, or was it today?
Time has blurred together, but Steve’s hand rests on your thigh as he drives and you’re his girl.
There will be time to talk about all of it later. You’ll make sure of it this time.
Steve’s foot presses on the gas, speeding through Hawkins. Neither of you were given an exact time frame from Hopper, but he presses down harder on the pedal and sends the car flying. There’s music on the radio, doing its best to distract everyone, but your hands are still antsy. You’re nervous, there’s still so much left unspecified within the plan. Steve notices your fidgeting fingers and removes his hand from your thigh to play with them; he’s trying to soothe you.
You intertwine your fingers through his and smile at him. Steve winks back at you, and you admire how lovely he looks as he drives. The moment is broken when Robin shoves her head between the two of you. “What the hell is a Cerebro?”
“It’s basically a radio tower that Dustin built for his girlfriend, Suzie.” You explain to her, voice raised to be heard over the music and wind. “She lives in Utah.”
Robin raises an eyebrow, intrigued. She leans back in her seat and pokes Dustin’s shoulder. “Suzie must be really special, huh? I mean, if you built this thing and lugged it all the way to the middle of nowhere just to talk to her.”
Your brother preens at this, pleased someone has recognized his romantic efforts. “I mean, nobody’s scientifically perfect, but Suzie’s about as close to being perfect as any human could possibly be.”
“She sounds made up to me.” Erica snarks from the backseat. She looks over at Steve, tries to get his opinion. “She sound made up to you?”
Steve hesitates for just a fraction of a second too long, and you sigh. Dustin notices it, too. “Why are you hesitating, Steve?”
“I–I’m not!” He looks to you for help, but you only shake your head at him. All he had to do was respond promptly. This is his own fault. “I’m not hesitating! I–I think she sounds real. You know, totally, absolutely real.”
“Not really loving your uncertain tone, Steve.” You say, and Dustin nods in agreement. “Suzie is real. I mean, I’m almost positive that she is.”
Dustin does a double take at your use of the word “almost”. He’s about to say something, demand to know why you’re not certain Suzie is real, before he notices that Steve is about to miss the Weathertop turn. “Left, turn left!”
“There’s not a road here?” Steve argues, squinting his eyes in the dark to see whatever the hell the kid is seeing.
Dustin screams at him again to turn, and you only have a second to brace yourself before Steve jerks the wheel. The car’s tires screech on the asphalt as your body gets thrown forward. You scream, getting war flashbacks to when you’d been in the back of Billy’s car as Max had very recklessly driven you and Steve to the tunnels. Somehow, this is so much worse.
The car breaks through a fence and your screaming only intensifies. “What the fuck?”
“Hendersons, where are we going?” Steve screams to you and your brother. He’s desperately trying to keep hold of the steering wheel as the car struggles against the hillside’s grass.
“Up!” You and Dustin exclaim. One hand clutches the door, the other clutches the seat. The entire car is practically at a ninety degree angle as Steve continues to drive up the hill. It’s bumpy, your head hits the back of the seat more times than you would like, and your heart races.
The car makes a concerning amount of strange noises the further up the hill you drive. Robin clutches her stomach. “We’re not going to make it!”
“Yes we are!” Steve does everything he can. His foot never leaves the gas. “C’mon, baby. C’mon!”
“Sweet talking the car won’t help!” You shriek after a particularly rough bump leaves you nauseous. The poor car strains against the giant hill. The tires, not at all made for off-roading, get caught in the grass.
Steve hits the wheel and curses. “C’mon! Please!” He presses harder on the gas, but the car comes to a stop. The tires move uselessly against the slick mud underneath.
Ill and desperately wanting to get out of the car, you unbuckle your seatbelt. “We can walk the rest of the way, Steve.” He gives you a despaired look, pleading with you to let him continue playing with his new car, but you roll your eyes at him. You’re five seconds away from vomiting, he can deal with abandoning the car. “The Toddfather is dead. We can mourn her later.”
Steve groans but turns the car off as everyone gets out, preparing for the walk ahead. The hill is just as steep as it had been earlier this week when you were with the party. While you’re annoyed you have to walk it again, at least this time it’s night and the heat isn’t as suffocating.
When you reach the crest of the hill, Dustin immediately runs to Cerebro. He crouches next to the radio and turns it on. “Bald Eagle, do you copy? Bald Eagle, I repeat, this is Scoops Troop, do you copy?”
Bald Eagle had been your idea.
“Scoops Troop?” You ask your brother.
He nods, proud. “Thought of it myself.”
“Not bad, buddy.”
Murray’s voice crackles over the walkie. “Yes, I copy.”
Everyone lets out a breath of relief when you hear him. So far, the first phase of the plan seems to be working. Cerebro can reach all the way down to the lair; you can communicate with Hopper and Joyce. So far, so good.
Dustin starts to give Murray the directions he’ll need for the vents. You and Steve roam the perimeter of the hill, weary and needing something to do. While you’re far from the Russians below you, you still don’t necessarily feel like you’re out of harm’s reach. Robin stays with the kids, figuring it’s best to give the two of you some time alone.
You stare out into the view of Hawkins from so high above. Weathertop has always been your favorite spot in the small town. Your first summer in Hawkins, Jonathan had introduced you to the hill; you used to spend all your time up here with him. You’d spend hours running up and down the length of it, giggling and sunkissed. If you stand still enough, you can still hear the laughter in the breeze. You miss Jonathan and being kids with him.
“I haven’t been up here in years.” Steve stands next to you, voice soft. He stares out into the field as well, admires its beauty the way you are, though really he just wants the excuse to look at you. “Forgot how peaceful it was.”
“I love it here,” you tell him. “Late in the summer, dandelions appear. They scatter the entire hilltop. I like running through them.”
“Well, when they start to bloom,” Steve wraps his arms around your waist, pulls you back into his chest. He presses a soft kiss to your cheek, lingers. He hasn’t held you in so long, his body aches with the weight of yours against it. “We can run through them together.”
You smile into the embrace, lean into the kiss, tremble into the words. He will always make you weak. It’s an exhilarating feeling, knowing someone can dismantle every bone in your body with less than six words. “I think I’d like that–”
From the corner of your eye, you see lights flickering in the distance. They catch your attention, standing out against the black backdrop of the night sky. You shrug Steve off, feeling a tug in your chest to walk closer to the hill’s edge. You need to figure out what you’re seeing. With every step you take, the more your vision focuses in on the lights, the more dread fills your body.
It’s the mall. The lights are coming from the mall.
You freeze.
The lights are going haywire, flickering wildly. It’s supposed to be deserted. Jonathan and the others were supposed to have left already, but still your stomach sinks. Something isn’t right.
Steve stumbles after you, confused as to why you pulled away, but when he sees the mall as well, he stills. “What the…?”
“They left. They said they would be gone by now.” You try to calm yourself down, try to focus on the reasoning. The mall is empty. It’s supposed to be empty. Jonathan promised you he would make it to Murray’s safely. He wouldn’t lie, he would never lie to you.
Robin, Dustin, and Erica come up behind you and Steve. You all stand there at the crest. No one moves, transfixed by what they see. The lights continue to flicker, miles below, impossibly too far away from help.
Someone has to help.
Your feet move, twisting your body to run back to the radio. You need answers. You need to know what the hell is going on, if everyone is safe, and Dustin is right behind you. He falls to the grass in front of the radio and frantically brings it to his lips. “Griswold Family, this is Scoops Troop. Do you copy? Over!”
He repeats the call over and over, but no one responds. With each passing moment of silence, your panic turns into blind fear. “I repeat, do you copy–” A sudden, horrifyingly familiar screech, one that has haunted your nightmares for years now, rips through the radio’s speaker. It’s loud and gruesome and sends ice into your body. Your brother’s concern rivals your own. “Griswold Family, please confirm your safety. Are you enroute to Bald Eagle’s nest?”
Dustin is screaming into the radio at this point, demanding answers, but there’s only snarling on the other side. Your breathing quickens, the edges of your vision blur. Sweat trickles down your neck. You can’t breathe. Jonathan is still at the mall. Mike and Will. Nancy, Max and Lucas.
El.
The Mind Flayer has them.
Steve tries to grab your hand, but you’re blind to it all. In raw desperation, you tear the radio out of Dustin’s hands and bring it to your own lips. “Jonathan! Nancy! Mike, anyone.”
Your pleads fill the void of a response in the night air. Steve sits next to you, all he can do is watch as your pleading turns into begging. Your voice cracks, the words scratch your throat. Seeing your white-knuckled grip on the radio, Steve can’t take it anymore.
“C’mon,” he takes your hand and pulls you up. Numb with fear, your body is limp. You try to fight him, you don’t know why he’s pulling you away from the radio when your friends need help, but Steve has made up his mind. He takes the device out of your hands and makes you look at him. “They need our help.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do!”
“Y/N, look at me.” Steve motions to the car, and finally you understand. “We’re going.”
Relief threatens to make your knees weak. Too wired from the debilitating combination of fear and helplessness, all you can do is nod at Steve and allow him to guide you down the hill. Dustin and Erica see that you’re leaving and try to stop you. “Where are you going?”
“To get them the hell outta there!” Steve calls over his shoulder, fumbling through his pocket to retrieve the keys. “Stay here, contact the others!”
Dustin calls out your name, anxious. He doesn’t want you to leave, and you hate that you have to leave him. But right now, he and Erica are as far from danger as physically possible. Weathertop hill is miles away from Starcourt. Right now, Jonathan needs you, and so do the others. Breaking out of Steve’s grasp, you run back to your brother and kiss his forehead. “I’ll be back, I promise.”
You run back to the car where Steve awaits, and Robin is quick to follow. She runs after the two of you and catches the walkie that Dustin tosses her. “Stay in touch,” he orders the three of you, still entirely against the whole thing.
“We will!” You shout back at him, already crawling into the car. “Stay safe, don’t do anything stupid, and stay here.”
The backdoor closes, Robin’s seatbelt clicks into place, then the Cadillac’s engine roars to life.
–
Your hands won't stop shaking as Steve drives. Nothing he says can reassure you. The car hasn’t gone below seventy miles an hour despite the narrow road, and still it doesn’t feel like it will be enough.
“I’m sure they’re okay.” Steve tries again to sound convincing, like his hands also don’t shake as he grips the steering wheel. “I mean, they have El. She’s a superhero.”
“Total superhero.” Robin unhelpfully chimes in. Her own nervousness is on display as she twists her fingers together.
You draw your knees into your chest, trying desperately to make yourself smaller. You’re terrified for your friends, you should’ve never split up. The party always does better when it’s together. Forcing air into your lungs, you stare out the windshield. “How much farther?”
“A minute, maybe even less.” Steve promises, pressing down even harder on the gas pedal. The engine’s roar deafens your ears, and you welcome the distraction.
In the distance you see Starcourt’s blinding neon lights. They grow bigger and bigger with every passing second, and you release the breath you had been holding when you see that you’re close. The moment of relief is short lived, however, when you hear gunshots pierce through the night. The sound rings in your eyes and the sight of Nancy firing the gun chokes you.
“There!” You point towards where she stands and Steve changes the direction of the car. The tires screech and your body thuds against the door but you don’t care. All you can focus on is Nancy standing in front of Jonathan’s car, unmoving as she fires bullet after bullet. Something seems to be wrong with his car, you can hear the engine fail each time he turns the key.
You squint your eyes. At first, you can’t see what Nancy is firing at, but within seconds you see the third car barreling straight towards her at a terrifying speed. In the driver’s seat is Billy. “Steve!”
“I see him!” He floors it.
The impact knocks all the air out of your body. It all happens so fast. Glass shatters. Metal hits metal. Your body gets thrown, your head roughly hits Steve’s shoulder as the car spins out. Your eyes squeeze shut at the momentum. You can’t remember if you scream.
“Are you guys okay?” Steve asks, panting, as soon as he car comes to a stop. His head is spinning yet the first thing he does is look to see if you’re hurt. There’s some glass in your hair, but for the most part there isn’t a scratch on you, which he’s thankful for.
“Ask me tomorrow?” Robin stares blankly ahead, still trying to process what’s just happened.
It takes a few moments for you to come to. Your ears are ringing. Your neck aches from being thrown so suddenly to the left. “Let’s never do that again.”
“Agreed…” Robin swallows, but quickly her mouth goes dry. “Oh, shit.”
You follow her line of sight and nearly throw up. The Mind Flayer crawls over the mall and releases a thundering screech, and the size of it alone makes you want to cry. It’s huge, bigger than anything you’ve ever seen before.
A car honks behind you, breaking you from your terror. Your head whips around, finding Nancy in the passenger seat of Jonathan’s car. “Get in!”
Quickly the three of you scramble out of the wrecked car. There isn’t room in any of the passenger seats, so you yank the trunk door open and scream at Robin and Steve to crawl in. It’s a tight fit, you have to press your back against Steve’s chest, but it’ll have to do.
As soon as the trunk is closed, Jonathan steps on the gas. You’re thrown further into Steve’s chest and Robin, who sits in front of you, lets out a quiet yelp when she sees the Mind Flayer chasing after the car, not far behind. Seeing this as well, Jonathan takes a rough turn and everyone in the car tries to brace for the rest of the ride.
“Are you okay, bug?” Jonathan shouts over his shoulder, eyes still on the road.
“Fine and dandy,” you pick a piece of glass out of your hair. Steve helps, carefully combing through your hair as well. The Mind Flayer screams, tries to lunge at the car, and your heart skips a beat. You try to distract yourself. “I crash cars every day. How about you guys, what brought y’all out here tonight?”
“Billy.” Everyone in the car says in unison.
You wince. “It’s always him, isn’t it?”
No one answers. Your quips don’t land. Robin hasn’t looked away from the Mind Flayer yet, Steve doesn’t want to look at it. Jonathan stares at the road ahead of him and Nancy flinches every time the Mind Flayer’s body thuds against the earth. The rest of the kids are silent, the echoes of its footfalls pounding against their eardrums.
It’s grim in the car. Really fucking grim.
“Dusty-bun, you copy?” A girl’s voice comes through over the radio. It’s not a voice you recognize; never in your life have you heard anyone besides your own mother refer to your brother as Dusty-bun.
Steve’s bewildered expression matches your own. Then Dustin’s voice crackles through the radio, and your bewilderment turns into relief. At least your brother is far away from whatever the hell is chasing you right now. “I copy, Suzie-poo. It sounds much better now, thanks.”
“Suzie,” Steve and Robin breathe out at the same time. You smile at them, smug. They had their doubts, but you were almost certain she had been real. Serves them right.
The nickname Dustin has for his girlfriend, however, is awful. “‘Suzie-poo’? That’s the best nickname he could’ve come up with?”
“I like bee, better.” Jonathan agrees.
Steve scoffs. “Honey has a nicer ring to it.”
“Both of you shut up!” You don’t have time for their weird ‘my horse is bigger than yours’ competition. Dustin’s started speaking over the radio again and you’re trying to listen in case it’s important. He’s asking Suzie whether she knows what Planck’s constant is, and you have no idea how any of this is relevant to the situation at hand.
“Okay, so I know it starts with two sixes, and then a…” Dustin’s voice trails off. Apparently this Planck thing is a number, one he can’t seem to remember. “W-What is it?”
“Okay, let me just be clear on this.” The tone of Suzie’s voice makes you pity your brother. It’s an angry tone, annoyed and fed up. Whatever she’s about to say, it won’t be pretty. “I haven’t heard from you in a week, and now you want a mathematical equation that you should know so you can… save the world?”
You whistle, commending the girl’s sense of self worth. “She’s got a point.”
Dustin pleads with her, promising that he’ll make it up to Suzie as soon as he can. You feel a bit bad for him, honestly. He really had been trying to contact her ever since he got home from camp. How was he supposed to know his week would end up being dominated by Russians?
“You can make it up to me now.” Suzie’s voice lowers a frightening octave. You have no idea what she’s about to say, and a large part of you wants to throw the radio out the window before you’re forced to find out.
“What?” Dustin sounds frightened as well, which doesn’t make you feel any better.
“I want to hear it.”
Horror fills you. It’s worse. So much worse than you ever could’ve imagined. You know exactly what Suzie wants from Dustin. “Oh, no… He told her.”
“Told her what?” Steve asks you, confused by this entire ordeal. Dustin and Suzie argue in the background. She’s insistent and your brother tries his best to convince her otherwise.
Jonathan’s eyes meet Steve’s in the rearview mirror, mischief in them. “Theater camp.”
“Jonathan Byers, I will hurt you!” You hiss at him, utterly mortified. Sometimes you despise the fact that he’s your closest friend. He knows far too much about you.
Steve has so many questions, but he forgets all of them when Dustin starts to sing. “Turn around, look at what you see.”
His voice is clear and beautiful, a testament to the countless hours the two of you were forced to endure in vocal lessons. When you were younger and still living in Virginia, your mother made you and your brother attend a musical theater camp every summer. She loved having you guys perform little shows for her around the house. Said your voices were like angels to listen to.
The day you and Dustin moved to Hawkins, you both swore to never tell anyone about the camp. The secret would die with you.
Jonathan only knows about it because your mom had him video tape Christmas carols a few years ago (like the traitor that he is). It had taken several batches of cookies, numerous pleas, and a handful of threats to ensure he wouldn’t tell anyone what he saw.
“In her face, the mirror of your dreams.” Dustin’s melodic voice floats through the car. The song had been one the two of you sang frequently at camp, its verses simple yet fun to sing together.
Steve and Robin share a look of disbelief. They’ve completely forgotten about the Mind Flayer still chasing after the car. Suzie, a surprisingly good singer as well, now joins Dustin. They sing together, in a sweet, childish way. You can’t help but sing along, harmonizing with them.
Everyone in the car looks at you as if you’re insane, but you’re too tired and exhausted to care. You’ve had the weirdest two days of your goddamn life. Sue you for singing along. It’s a good song.
That, or maybe you’re just delirious from dehydration.
After a minute or so, the song comes to a close, and you’re almost saddened by that. You’ve missed singing with your brother. You make a mental note to bug him about it later. “Planck’s constant is 6.62607004.”
Dustin laughs into the radio, happy that Suzie finally revealed the number. “You just saved the world!”
“Gosh, I miss you, Dusty-bun.”
The two continue to go back and forth with their baby talk, which you cringe at. It’s disgusting to overhear, although you guess you understand now why Dustin hates being around you and Steve. You’ll apologize to him later.
Dustin’s voice cuts off unexpectedly, which you assume is Erica’s doing. You’ll also thank her later. The car goes quiet again. No one knows what to follow Dustin’s impromptu performance with.
“So, theater camp, huh?” Steve finally breaks the silence, squeezing you gently in his arms as he teases.
“Tell anyone and I swear I’ll–” The Mind Flayer suddenly turns around, catching your attention. It runs away, back towards the mall. It doesn’t make any sense. Everyone is here, in the car. It only wants El. Unease twists your stomach. You lean forward and look at who is in the car. When you see Will and Lucas in the seat in front of you, you panic. “Where are the others?”
You’re practically crawling over the seat to try and get to Jonathan and Nancy. “Where’s Max and El? Where the hell is Mike?”
Nancy tries to distance herself from your anger. “We got separated, but they’re–they’re fine. We had to guide the Mind Flayer away from the mall–”
“So you left them?”
“We didn’t really have much of a choice, Y/N!” Nancy screams back at you now, insulted that you truly believe she would ever leave her brother behind willingly. She wouldn’t do that. She knows that you know this.
“It’s going back for them! It fucking turned around, can’t you see that? We need to follow it, now!”
“Y/N–”
“Turn. Around.”
“Steve, sit Y/N back down!” Jonathan’s yell cuts in between you and Nancy. You’re about to start spewing curses at him, but Steve’s arms are strong and force you back into his lap. You’re livid. “Hold on!”
Jonathan knows you’re right. He tightens his hold on the steering wheel and stomps on the brakes. The car spins, he twists the wheel, controls it as best as he can, before he steadies the vehicle and accelerates back towards the mall.
–
When you get to the mall, Lucas announces that he has a plan.
“Fireworks have an insane amount of gunpowder in them.” He explains to the group, waving around a handful of fireworks he left in the trunk. You’re all carrying some as you run through the mall’s parking lot. “If we tie them together, we can mimic the damage of dynamite.”
“Think it’ll be enough to kill the Mind Flayer?” Nancy asks, hesitant.
“If we throw them from above, yeah!”
You kiss Lucas’ cheek, only barely managing not to trip over your feet as you run. “I think you’re a genius, Sinclair.”
Inside the mall, everyone quickly sets the fireworks up. Faintly you can hear the Mind Flayer lurking somewhere, its roars echoing throughout the building, but it hasn’t found you guys yet. Lighters get passed around, fireworks get messily taped together, groups are divided in an attempt to cover the most ground. Jonathan with Nancy. Will with Lucas. You and Steve with Robin.
You’re taping together the last of your fireworks when you look down over the railing. You almost drop the fireworks in your hand when you see Billy hovering over El. He’s so much bigger than she is. She’s hardly even visible beneath him. Your stomach churns. “He’s here.”
Thuds shake the ground. The Mind Flayer descends from the rooftop and crawls over to where Billy has placed El. Its mouth opens, preparing for the kill, and Lucas throws the first firework. “Flay this, you ugly piece of shit!”
Bursts of light collide into the monster. It hisses, turns to face the direction the firework was thrown, and Lucas throws another into its mouth.
Smoke begins to fill the air. The whistle of the rockets sting your ears. The light blinds you. It’s loud and messy and fireworks rain down upon the monster. Everyone throws the bundles they have, and yet still you hesitate. Billy’s eyes flash through your mind. How the red in them overtook the icy blue. The sweat that poured from his face. The cruelty that seeped through his skin.
It’s horrible what’s happened to him. He didn’t deserve to become a pawn in this maddening game.
But someone has to end it. You breathe in, relax your body, and bring your lighter to the first firework. Its heat licks at your skin as you release it into the air. You hit the side of its body, sending the Mind Flayer stumbling back.
“Hey, asshole. Over here!” Steve throws a firework and its blasts almost scorches the two of you. It’s dangerous, stray fireworks threaten to crash into everyone, but the plan seems to be working. WIth every hit the Mind Flayer takes, the more he weakens.
Your thumb burns as you light fireworks over and over again. The motion is repetitive, just enough to keep the fear in you at bay. It’s deafening within the mall. It’s exhilarating. It’s dizzying. Reds, blues, yellows, greens all light up the sky.
Distantly, through the haze of smoke, you watch as the fireworks affect Billy as well. He cowers each time the Mind Flayer gets hit, but it also seems to enrage him as well. He grabs El’s wounded leg and drags her closer to the monster.
Helplessly you wish you were down there with El, helping her. However, all you can do is continue throwing fireworks in a crazed attempt to save the ones you love. You scream with every throw, exerting all your strength to throw them as far as you physically can. But you’re quickly running out of ammunition.
“Dustin, we’re out of time!” Steve screams into the walkie, breath heaving with soot on his face.
Your brother screams back, pleading with Hopper to close the gate. No one answers him, and you hold back exhausted sobs as you throw the remaining fireworks. They won’t be enough. Someone has to close the gate, sever any connection the Upside Down has to your world. It’s the only way any of you are making it out alive.
Yet it remains open, and Billy has now crawled back on top of El.
She seems to be saying something to him, but in the cloud of smoke and explosions you can’t be sure. Robin helps you light the last firework, Steve aims it, and you’re numb to it all. He throws it, it explodes into a shower of purple. Its ashes scatter around Billy, singes his back, and you see now that he’s stopped moving.
“That was the last one!” Robin shouts over the screams of the fireworks. Steve runs a hand through hair and curses. There isn’t anything else the three of you can do.
You run to the railing and look around, feverish to find any way to help. Jonathan catches your eye from across the plaza. He looks just as distraught as you are. Your palm hits against the metal of the railing in frustration. There has to be something. Then you see Max and Mike below, standing on the outskirts of where Billy and El are, all alone.
“I’m going down!” You scream to Robin and Steve. You have to get down there. Someone has to be with them. They’re too close to the fire and explosions and monsters.
“Y/N, wait–” Steve tries to stop you, but you plead with him.
“Steve, I need you to trust me.” There’s a raw, overwhelming feeling within you that something bad is about to happen. You can’t shake it, the feeling of loss being inevitable frightens you. For three years now you’ve saved everyone, done everything right. For three years, you’ve gotten lucky. You don’t know how to explain all of this to Steve, the fear that has followed you ever since you first intercepted the Russian code. “Please.”
Maybe it’s the way you say it. Maybe it’s the tears that stream down your face as you look at him. Whatever the reason may be, Steve reluctantly lets go of you. Endlessly thankful for him, your hands cradle his face as you kiss him. He makes a cute, surprised noise, and you wish more than anything that you can bask in the warmth of his lips, but you can’t.
You force yourself to pull away. “I’ll be back, take care of the others.”
And then you’re gone.
Footsteps echoing against the walls of the mall, you run down the stairs and straight towards Max and Mike. They hear you approach and suddenly they’re both in your arms. They hold onto you tightly, none of you can tear your eyes away from the scene in front of you. Billy slowly stands up and away from El. His movements are labored as he walks in front of the Mind Flayer, blocking its path to her.
They stand, face to face, unmoving. Predator against prey. Your heart pounds in your throat as you watch, too scared to move. In an almost imperceptible velocity, the Mind Flayer extends its claws.
Billy raises his arms, stopping the monster from piercing through El, protecting her. “No!” A guttural, animalistic scream tears apart his vocal chords. He screams, over and over again, as the Mind Flayer struggles against him.
Max freezes in your arms, you feel her choke on her gasp.
Everything happens slowly after that.
The first claw that penetrates Billy’s side.
The second one that cuts through his other side.
Then the third one, the fourth and the fifth and the sixth. They pierce through his skin, sink into the flesh. His body goes limp as he’s suspended into the air. The Mind Flayer hisses down at him, its teeth bared, and Billy, who has never been afraid, screams in the face of death as the monster fatally punctures his chest.
Everything stops.
“Billy!” You will never forget the pain in Max’s scream. It will become yet another sound that haunts your nightmares.
As you stand there with a paralyzed Max in your arms, the Mind Flayer drops Billy’s body onto the ground. He lands with a sickening thud. The Mind Flayer’s body crashes into the walls, it convulses, spasms, leaving destruction in its wake. Then, all together, it stills and falls to the ground.
The gate has been closed.
Mike tears himself from your arms and runs over to El. He pulls her into a hug and she begins to sob. You and Max walk numbly over to them, neither of your eyes leave Billy’s bleeding body. He shudders weakly where he lays, a pool of blood encasing his body.
“Billy?” Max knees next to him. She’s crying, she doesn’t know what to do. There’s so much blood. “Billy, get up. Please, Billy. Get up, please.”
You kneel next to her, at her side through it all.
Blood pours from Billy’s mouth. He coughs and the wet sound only makes Max cry harder. He looks up at you, his eyes are finally blue again. “Talking to you… sweetheart.”
But if you need anyone to talk to, about anything, come find me, okay?
Those had been your last words to him.
“Billy…” He had tried to find you. He had been lost and scared and alone. He didn’t know what had been happening to him, why his anger became venom. A sob is wrenched from your mouth. He had been all alone, and he had tried to find you.
Billy coughs again, more blood leaks from his wounds. With the last of his strength, he turns his head to Max. “I’m sorry…” His chest heaves in pain, he labors two final breaths, before his chest falls entirely. It doesn’t rise again.
Max shakes his shoulders, uncaring for the wounds there. She shakes him, begs and pleads with him to wake up, but his body remains lifeless. She lets out one final, anguished sob. “Billy.”
She buries her face in your chest and sobs. You hold her, El joins. The girl tries to soothe Max, she tries to keep you together, but you break as well.
You cry for the boy Billy had once been. Max had told you stories from before. How he would drive her to the skate park, scare off any older boy who tried to taunt her. She told you about how he used to love surfing in California, before his mom had left them and his dad became violent.
Max told you about how kind Billy had once been, she knows he used to be kind. How she could see it in him still, hiding the bruises from his father to not scare her. To make her feel safe in their own home even if he intimidated her as well; it was the violence in him that was created by a monster far more vile than the Mind Flayer.
You cry for Max, too young to lose such a complicated loved one. You know the pain better than anyone else. How it hurts to grieve them, how it makes you feel pathetic to miss someone who has only hurt you, but the tenderness of knowing them tethers you to it all. Billy had been her brother. There is no greater tether than that.
You cry because you loved and have lost. You will blame yourself for having not said anything about Billy’s off behavior. You had seen the first signs of what the Mind Flayer did to him. He had been stranded on the side of the road, bloodied and bruised, blue eyes darker than normal, and you had done nothing except tell him to come find you.
And then you had left him.
Billy Hargrove died alone.
You and Max will share the burden of this guilt.
–
Jonathan finds you first, then Steve. You’re on the floor, kneeling with Max in your arms, two broken pieces finding solace in the other. Billy’s body lies next to you, neither you nor Max can bear to look at it.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” they’re the only words you can say to the girl.
Max clutches your arms around her and her tears soak your shirt. El and Steve try to coax her out of your arms, but she doesn’t move. She refuses to let go of you, though she allows Jonathan to drape his arms over you and hold you as your own sobs echo within the mall.
Nancy and the others join. They leave a wide berth around the dead body before them. Nancy sees that you’re in no condition to guide, so she takes over for you. She instructs Steve and Lucas to take Max from your arms so that they can stand the two of you up. The fire from the wreckage is quickly spreading and you’ll need to evacuate soon.
“It’s okay, bug. You’re okay.” Jonathan whispers in your ear, one hand delicate on your arm. Steve’s hands rest upon your other arm, and together the two of them are able to get you onto your feet.
Your body shakes, grief sits heavily upon your chest. Steve’s eyes never leave your weak frame.
It’s all a blur after that.
Firefighters break through the mall and evacuate the building. Nancy and Jonathan do all the talking. Someone, you think it’s Steve, carefully guides you through the maze of burning rubble and bodies. It’s raining outside and the soft thunder almost drowns out the drone of the helicopters that swarm the building.
There are ambulances amongst the military trucks and you’re shoved into one by a concerned medic. The woman explains to you that you’re in shock, that your body is in a state of perpetual flight. She allows Steve to sit and stay with you only after she’s finished patching up his split lip and bruised eye.
“It’s going to take some time to heal,” the medic explains to you. She’s soft spoken, maternal, and in your numb state she reminds you of your mother. “You kids went through a lot tonight.”
Time.
It always goes back to time.
Steve rubs your back and kisses the top of your head every few minutes. You rest your head against his shoulder, body pressed against his, a blanket draped around both of your shoulders’. Neither of you say anything. His hand on your back is warm, it unthaws the ice that the shock has left behind. His touch grounds you, keeps you afloat.
A car pulls up in the distance and its doors slam. Your eyes drift up, finding Joyce’s as she stumbles through the crowd of armed soldiers and firefighters. She stumbles around, lost in some haze that clouds her once shining face. Joyce looks around in concern, trying to find her sons, and somehow you know, even before her face crumbles when she sees you, that something terrible has happened.
Her eyes meet yours.
Hopper isn’t with her.
Will rushes towards his mother and almost knocks her down with how hard he hugs her. Joyce clings onto him and breaks into heartwrenching, bone crushing, sobs. You can hear her from where you sit with Steve, you can feel the weight of her loss like thickened water in your lungs.
In the other ambulance next to you, El, who had been resting in Mike’s lap, stands up when she sees Joyce. She walks towards the woman as she embraces her son. Though El faces away from you, standing alone in the middle of the parking lot, the way her shoulders shake as she begins to fall apart indicates the remnants of her childhood have died tonight.
“Hopper’s dead.” They’re the first words you’ve spoken all night. Your voice is hoarse from disuse and the words echo, taunting you.
Steve doesn’t say anything, only a heavy sigh leaves his body.
There were three deaths tonight. Billy, Hopper, and El’s childhood. One for every year you got lucky. The fear that had been creeping through the back of your mind finally presents itself to you. It manifests in the humid July air and it laughs at you. Saving Will, closing the gate, destroying the Mind Flayer. They were debts needed to be fulfilled, and they were paid for tonight.
You see Max and Robin sitting on a stretcher across from you. Max also hasn’t said anything all night, lost in her own grief and remorse. Joyce still sobs in Will’s arms. El grieves alone, mourning the closest thing she’s ever had to a father.
You see Jonathan and Nancy whispering quietly to one another in another ambulance. They share a blanket like you do with Steve, but Nancy’s eyes are sunken in and Jonathan’s face is pale. Lucas and Mike sit together, too exhausted to say anything.
You’re all bleeding or burned or bruised and you’re tired.
“Sometimes…” Your voice cracks, tears threaten to silence you, and you force yourself to breathe in. Force yourself to focus, to get the words out. They’re important, somehow, even if you don’t know why. “Sometimes it feels like I’ve used up all my luck.”
Steve draws small circles into your ribcage. His fingers catch on the raised skin, the scar from when you saved his life last year. “Luck?”
“When Will went missing… It was pure luck that I found him. Brought him back home.” You weren’t supposed to have been with the kids when they found El. You were lucky that night, it was luck that threw you into the middle of it all. “It was luck that saved Will last year, too. Those tunnels…” Your body shivers at the memory. It had been so cold down there, the smell of the damp earth is a scent you will never forget. “And now I–”
Your words catch in your throat. Steve’s body presses against yours, he waits for you, patient. When your voice returns, you try again. “And now I… I’m not sure how I feel.”
“Why’s that, angel?” Steve listens, he tries to understand. “I mean, the Mind Flayer is gone. We won.”
You saved Hawkins. You saved El. You know this, and it should be enough, but it isn’t. “All the deaths that took place tonight stain everything.”
El’s father is dead. Joyce had come so close to loving again. Max no longer has someone to call a brother. Billy, who endured so much hurt when he was a child, never got the chance to experience kindness when he grew up.
Billy never got the chance to become good, not like you did. You were lucky to have even become kind again in the first place. It had taken years to turn the hurt from your childhood into empathy. You had a mother who called you her sweet girl even when you screamed horrible insults at her. You had a brother who held your hand through the anger that your father left behind. You had a best friend who taught you that not everyone leaves. There had been people who loved you, who were gentle, who showed you that anger can be turned into something soft.
But all Billy ever knew in his life was violence and cruelty. It isn’t fair.
“My entire life I’ve been lucky,” your chest constricts as you confess everything to Steve. All your fear, the doubt, the insecurity. “Now it–it feels like I’ve used up all my luck.” Your fingers find Steve’s, a mind of their own as your body seeks the solace only he can bring. He doesn’t know that he’s the reason you believe you’ve had more luck than anyone else in their life. “I… I was lucky to have met you, to become your friend, someone you trust. How could I possibly have any luck left over after everything we’ve been through together?”
Everything burns in Steve. He understands what you’re trying to say, he does, but he doesn’t agree. Steve hooks the pad of his fingertip underneath your chin and coaxes your head up, he wants you to look at him as he speaks. He needs you to hear him. To understand. “Well, that’s where you’re wrong.”
You wipe your eyes, uncomfortable under Steve’s open and earnest gaze. “I’m wrong?”
He hums, strokes a finger from the dip of your cheek up to the crest of your brow. He admires you, memorizes the skin beneath his. “You’ve taught me a lot of things, but you’re wrong about that luck theory of yours. See, I have my own theory that you can never run out of luck if you love, and you taught me that to love and be loved is the luckiest thing a person can give and receive.”
Steve remembers the first day he ever saw you. He’d been thirteen, you had been twelve. He remembers how small you looked to him, yet lovely nonetheless, even back then. You had always been so lovely to Steve, kind, delicate, admirable.
Your eyes stare into Steve’s and he remembers the first day he spoke to you. The squeal of your bike tires as you almost crashed into his car. The way the setting sun cast you in a golden glow in the ditch you landed in as Steve offered you his hand. How, the moment you laughed at what he said, he felt breathless.
You smile at Steve now, the same smile all those years ago, the smile he saw when he was thirteen and believed in knights and dragons. Now, at eighteen, you smile at Steve and he believes in fates that attach people to one another and mold them into one being.
“And I’m lucky enough to be able to love you, angel.”
Steve’s words cut through you. They’re the good that remind you of the light of the sun that follows the dark of the night. It’s almost like an awakening, a slow remembering, how can someone run out of luck if they love with everything within them?
You see Mike now consoling El. She’s in pain, but Mike bears the hurt with her. You see Jonathan and Nancy sleep soundly against each other, safe in the other’s arms. Lucas holds Max’s hand as Robin cracks a joke that gets the young girl to laugh. Will strokes his fingers through his mother’s hair, offering her love that only a son can.
Even while there is so much grief and pain within this world, the love that follows overwhelms it.
Steve stares down at you, eyes soft with contentedness. There isn’t a pressure behind them, he doesn’t need you to say anything to him. He’s simply happy to have you in his arms, to have you with him now, to remind him of how lucky he is, and you’re so full of love for him.
“I’m lucky enough to be able to love you, too, sweet honey.”
Steve Harrington smiles the boyish smile that you fell for long before you knew what love even was, and he kisses you. He breathes you in, he has you right where he wants you.
You finally, finally, have come home.
–
Time passes slowly afterwards; you take it one day at a time.
After the mall burns down, your job is practically all but saved. It’s a small, bittersweet thing. Mrs. Waters had told you the news with her own bittersweet smile, mourning her dear friend Mrs. Driscoll who died in the fire. She will never know the truth, that the woman had become part of an army created by a monster.
“But at least Doris would be happy that I still have my store,” the woman said as she stacked books with you at the counter. It had only taken you two days before finding yourself falling back into old habits. Your mother had wanted you to stay home for the rest of the summer, but Bookstrordinary has always been a second home to you, and you couldn’t bear the silence in the house. Mrs. Waters sighed sadly, looking down. “I miss her.”
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Waters.” You squeezed her hand, mourned with her.
Hopper’s funeral took place a week after Starcourt burned down. The entire town showed up, something that you know the old man would’ve hated, and he was crowned Hawkins’ hero. You spent the ceremony in the very back, holding El’s hand, so that the two of you wouldn’t be seen.
Billy’s funeral was a few days after Hopper’s. Max sat alone at the front of the church, Billy’s father had been too drunk to attend and her mother couldn’t get the time off of work. After the ceremony, the girl silently followed you into your car and spent the rest of the day at Bookstrordinary with you. She hadn’t wanted to go home to an empty house, and you understood the feeling.
Max spends most of her summer with you at the store after that. Some days she helps restock the shelves, singing along to your set of tapes, bright and cheery. But some days she’s quiet, sits in a corner and pretends to read whatever you hand her. El stops by the store sometimes, too. You read comics to her, bake her the oatmeal raisin cookies she loves so much, and gossip about Mike and Lucas if Max is having one of her good days.
During the first week you bake Joyce’s favorite muffins, the second week you bake her brownies. You offer her a shoulder to cry on every time you stop by the Byers home, you reminisce over Hopper and his disdain for you; she appreciates everything you do.
Steve spends every single day with you, it doesn’t matter where you are. Without a job, he follows you everywhere. Whether you’re at work, at home, even at Jonathan’s or Nancy’s, he’s always able to find you with Robin right behind him. Nancy thinks the newfound trio is bizarre, but Jonathan can’t help but laugh whenever he sees Robin talking your ear off while Steve follows you around like a moth to a flame.
Together, you all try to heal.
Two weeks pass and you’re woken up by the ringing of your phone.
“Hello?” Annoyance seeps through your greeting. You’ve only just managed to fall asleep, the nightmares at bay for once.
“Come outside, angel.”
His voice wakes you up, the annoyance now replaced with confusion. “Steve?”
“Wear something warm, okay?”
“What–?” He hangs up, the line disconnects, and you’re completely taken aback by the phone call. You didn’t make any plans with Steve tonight, at least not any that you can recall. He had spent the day with you at work, ate dinner with you and your family, before watching a movie with Dustin and going home.
You’re not entirely sure why he’s called you at nearly two in the morning to come outside, but you listen anyways. On your desk chair lays the cardigan Steve bought you for Christmas, his initials stitched into the sleeve. Sliding it over your shoulders, you quickly put it on before climbing through your window.
Steve’s car is parked two houses from yours, headlights off. There’s music faintly playing that can be heard through the window, and a familiar melody has you running to get inside. “The Beatles?”
They were the band that you and your dad used to listen to. His fingers would strum their songs on his guitar as the two of you sat side by side on the front porch of your childhood home. He would hum the words to you. Told you that you should know about real music.
When your dad left, he took the music with him.
Jonathan had tried to get you into his favorite artists. The Smiths, David Bowie, the Clash. He would sit you down in his room and play their songs over his record player and watch your reactions. While the music was good, and you’ve come to love them because the artists reminded you of Jonathan, it was never the same as listening to the Beatles with your dad during early July mornings.
Then one night, when you and Steve had been driving around Hawkins, a Beatles song began to play over the radio. Unknowing of your history with the band, Steve started to hum along the same way your dad would do, and it was finally then that music was brought back into your life.
“What, I don’t get a hello?” Steve is smiling ear to ear, seeing the flushed joy on your face and the cardigan you wear.
You throw your body over the center console and hug him. “Hi, honey.”
As he drives, Steve is unusually quiet. His initial smug greeting upon your arrival is quickly overshadowed by a shy demeanor. Steve’s fingers fidget on the steering wheel, his foot taps against the car’s floor. The Beatles play softly within the car and somewhere along the route you find that the wooded scenery starts to look familiar.
He’s driving you to Lover’s Lake.
“Why are we heading towards the lake?” You ask Steve, but he pretends not to hear you. Instead, he turns the radio up and sings along to Paul McCartney. Your eyes wander to the backseat and notice a small box nestled against the leather.
A few minutes later Steve parks the car and wordlessly the two of you get out. It’s dark, the moon reflects off the lake’s water. Crickets sing in the air and the waves lap at the shore. It’s a beautiful night, the July heat is masked by the night’s breeze; your cardigan keeps you warm.
Lost in admiring the view, you don’t notice that Steve has left your side until he returns with a picnic basket. The box you saw earlier is tucked underneath his arm. You tilt your head at him, quizzically. “What are you planning, Harrington?”
Steve grabs your hand. “You’ll see.”
He leads you down to the lake’s edge where the water meets the sand. There’s a trail that Steve once found when he was nine. It had been during the last fishing trip he had ever taken with his dad. The man commanded him to hook the worm and Steve cried. Embarrassed and ashamed, Steve had run towards where the sand met the woods and found a meadow hidden within it.
There are flowers in full bloom within the meadow, and you gasp when you see their vibrant pinks and blues. The flowers are delicate yet their stems are long. Steve sets the picnic basket down and pulls a blanket out from it. He sets it onto the grass and lays down, motioning you to join him.
The stars are clear tonight, shining bright above the two of you. They almost seem to wink at you as you lay side by side with Steve. His hand is in yours, as it always is these days, and with only the stars as his witness, Steve whispers into your ear, “Thank you for staying.”
His breath warms your neck, and you know, without having to ask, what he’s thanking you for. Your promise to him last year, that you’d wait for him. He hadn’t been ready. The timing of it all wouldn’t have been right, but you knew, even back then, that you’d wait forever for Steve Harrington if it meant you’d receive even half of his love.
Take your time, I’ll be here.
“It was the easiest thing I’ve ever done.” The words come easily to you, raw with truth and vulnerability.
A soft sigh escapes Steve. He turns his head to you, eyes finding yours, and you’ve never seen such tenderness within him. He opens his mouth, sighs out the words you’ve longed to hear again since that night at Starcourt. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” You don’t think you’ll ever tire of saying those three words to him. There’s so much love within you, so much you’ve ached to give out ever since you were a little girl, and now you finally can.
Steve kisses you with a softness that releases a sigh from your own lips, and you know he’s wholly, truly, yours now. With a swift motion, Steve places himself on top of you as you kiss. His weight presses down on you, one hand cups your cheek and the other steadies him. His hair tickles your face, his cologne clouds your brain, and the sweet taste of July honey coats your tongue.
Minutes, maybe even hours, pass as you kiss Steve. It’s lazy, no sense of urgency as your lips move against his. It’s warm, it’s soft. Eventually he manages to pull himself away from you, he’s brought you here for other reasons tonight.
“Hold on, I got you something.” Steve fixes his hair, clears his throat, and pulls out a container from the basket. He reveals a freshly baked loaf of banana bread on a beautiful glass plate. There’s a small, lopsided candle on top of it.
“You came prepared tonight,” you tease him, still breathless from the kisses and love.
“My mom did, actually. She’s the one who made this.” You sit up and look at Steve, wide eyed. He laughs at you, finding your stunned reaction endearing. “Relax, angel. She really wanted to bake you something, and I had to make up for allowing Russians to ruin your seventeenth birthday, didn’t I?”
Words escape you. Steve’s mom made you banana bread, a woman you have still yet to meet, though you’ve only heard fond stories about. She had insisted on doing this kind thing for you.
Steve lights the candle and holds the plate up for you. “C’mon, make a wish, Y/N.”
You close your eyes, smiling, and the wish comes easily to you.
For time to stay like this, forever.
You blow the candle out, Steve cuts the banana bread, and you take turns feeding it to one another. The dessert is delicious, freshly baked and still warm. It’s sweet and nostalgic and everything you could ever ask for.
When you’ve finished eating, Steve claps his hands. “Alright, now onto the real event of the night!”
You raise an eyebrow. “What, the kissing wasn’t enough?” Steve makes a panicked noise and you laugh at him. “I was teasing, honey.”
“You terrify me,” he huffs, before revealing a box from behind him, the very same one you’ve been curious about all night.
“I aspire to be terrifying,” you stick your tongue out at Steve before turning the box over in your hands. It’s light, lighter than you expected. “Is this my gift you’ve been bragging about?” For months leading up to your birthday, Steve had been boasting about this amazing gift he had thought of, how he had convinced the party to help him.
“Open it and find out.” There’s a glint in Steve’s eyes, yet you also see the shyness return as well. He’s nervous to see your reaction, he wants more than anything to have gotten this right.
You roll your eyes at him but open the box. It isn’t wrapped like your other gifts from Steve have been. Instead the box is made of a dark oak, and its lid opens with a soft click. The silver catches your attention first. It’s a small chain with two silver ovals on opposite sides. In between the two ovals is a collection of charms.
“Is this…?” The charms are all roughly the same size, but each vastly different from the other.
Steve nods at you, rubs the back of his neck. “It’s a charm bracelet.”
Moonlight reflects off of one of the charms, revealing it to be a frog, another one to be a cookie, and slowly you piece it together. There’s six charms, one for each member of the party. “Steve.”
“Have you figured it out–oomph!” He lands with a thud on his back as you attack him with a hug. Slightly out of breath, he laughs and wraps his arms around you. “I’ll take that as a yes, then.”
“How did you get the kids to do this?” You lay on top of him, blinking back tears as you hold the bracelet delicately in your hands to admire it.
Steve sighs in exasperation. “Money and a lot of begging. They were all for picking out charms for you, I just had to pay them to spend more than five minutes with me at the jewelry store.”
You laugh, that sounds exactly like them, and you love those kids with everything within you. Holding up the frog pendant, you know which kid picked it out for you. “Mike?”
“Yup. Said something about Kermit the frog?”
“He’s such a little shit,” you say with fondness. Last year, when Billy had nearly choked you to death, your voice had been lost and Mike wouldn’t stop referring to you as Kermit. Your fingers skim over the pendant next to it, a simple blue one, and you smile. “Dustin?”
“He told me about your code blues.” Steve rubs your back, content to have you resting against him. You hum, touched that your brother trusted Steve enough to confide this to. No one else knows about your code blues, it’d been a special thing just between the two of you.
With your ear pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, Steve explains the rest of the charms to you. His voice is lazy, slow, lilting with fondness, and his hand a firm weight against your back. Max chose a knife charm to remind you of how badass you are. Will chose a bee, because he’ll always be your little bee. Lucas was able to find a small, white flower that resembles a dogwood, knowing that it’s your favorite. As for El, she chose a cookie based solely on her love for the ones you bake for her.
“What about the ovals?” You ask Steve after he’s done explaining what the kids chose for you. The ovals are slightly larger than the charms, almost serving as a divider between them. The metal is smooth underneath your fingers.
He brushes hair out of your face and winks. “Turn them over.”
With slight confusion, you do, and discover that they’re engraved. Etched onto the back of one oval is honey, and, on the other, angel is written. They’re your names for one another, nestled between charms from the kids you love so dearly in your life; this is a gift made from pure, unadulterated love.
“Oh my god,” it’s perfect, absolutely perfect. Your lips are all over Steve’s face before he even has time to blink. You scatter millions of kisses upon his face, drown him in them, With every kiss that you press upon his pretty skin, you shower him with praise. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”
Steve laughs and tries to move his face away, but really he leans into the onslaught of love. His cheeks burn from smiling so hard and from the heat you always make him feel. He grabs your waist and enjoys the skin he holds. “You like it?”
“I love it, Steve!”
“Does this make up for the whole Russian fiasco?” He asks, only joking a little bit. He still feels awful for dragging you into everything, but with time he’s learning to forgive himself. Before he overthinks it, Steve adds, “Am I now the best boyfriend in the world?”
His words make you blush, and you don’t think you’ll ever get used to Steve being yours. You’ve waited so long to be his, to hold him and kiss him like you do now. You cherish the feeling, the sensation of knowing a boy loves you the way that Steve does. “You’ve definitely redeemed yourself for getting me trapped in a Russian lair on my birthday. And you’re definitely the best boyfriend in the world.”
Steve, despite being underneath you, does a victory dance and whoops into the night. He’s elated, his face shines when you look down at him, and you’ve never been so in love before. You once thought you knew what love was, what the burn of it could feel like. But now, with Steve lying beneath you as his arms keep you from falling, you know that love is airless, light, cool to the touch and warm on the skin. Love isn’t supposed to hurt, it’s supposed to feel like coming home after a long day of being out in the cold.
After Steve helps you put on the charm bracelet, you lay together in the meadow. The lake’s waves can be heard in the distance. Crickets chirp their greeting, the stars wink hello above you. Their noises serve as a lullaby to you, soothing you to an almost sleep-like state. You nestle your head into the crook of Steve’s neck and let out a sleepy exhale.
Feeling this, Steve strokes the back of your hair. “You fallin’ asleep on me, Henderson?”
“I’m resting my eyes.”
“Very convincing,” he chuckles, tightening his embrace to try and stave off the cold that creeps in. He lets out his own tired sigh, your weight upon him has always put him at ease. He inhales, smells your perfume, and he can’t believe that he’s here right now with you. After everything he’s been through, he can’t believe that somehow he’s come out of it with you next to him. Last year he thought he had lost you forever. This year he can see forever with you. “I think I like this July a whole lot better than the last one.”
It’s meant to be a joke, a gentle tease. More of a reflection of how far the two of you have come in such a short amount of time, but still Steve’s words remind you of something. You’ve never told him the real reason why you left last summer. Why you ran away from him.
“I was scared, last summer.”
Steve tilts his head at you. “Scared of what?”
“I was scared of falling in love with you,” the confession lifts from your chest. It hangs over you both, the weight of it tangible. Steve’s eyes soften, he lets out a soft oh, and you duck your head shyly. “Last July, you were… Everything. You were everything to me, and it terrified me. I was still figuring my feelings out for Jonathan back then, you had Nancy, but you were so lovely and I just–I couldn’t do it. It wouldn’t have been fair, not to anyone, but I’m sorry.”
“Y/N…” Steve hadn’t known. All this time, he thought he had done something wrong. But really you had been trying to protect yourself, protect him, and he understands now why you had to leave him for a while. He sees the distress on your face and he shushes you, kisses your forehead. “Don’t apologize, okay? I honestly would’ve run away too, if I were you. I’m just… You came back to me, in the end. That’s all I care about.”
He’s too good for you. “I still hurt you.”
“You’re human,” Steve brushes more hair out of your face. “We all make mistakes. You ditched me for a few months and I almost got you killed by crazy Russians. I think we’re pretty even now.”
Despite the guilt in your throat, Steve manages to draw a smile from you. It’s what he’s always done best. Even on the day Will had gone missing, he had been the one to ease the loss by pretending not to have known your name. He had made you laugh when you thought you could never laugh again. Steve would do anything to get you to smile, and you cannot imagine where you’d be without him. “We always even our debts, huh?”
“It’s tradition at this point.”
And you laugh, full-bellied and loud and recklessly. It echoes into the night, Steve’s reverberates into your ears, and you’re happy.
–
A month passes, and in the mid-August heat, Jonathan knocks on your window late one night.
His knuckles rap against the glass and it’s a sound reminiscent of before, when you were little kids who didn’t know how yet to hurt each other. You crawl out of your bed, curious, though happy nonetheless to let him in.
You go to open your curtain, ready to tell the boy all about what Dustin had done today, unaware that when you open the curtain, everything will change.
Jonathan is crying.
“Bee, oh my God.” You quickly open the window and he manages to crawl through, though sobs wrack his body. He’s shaking, and for a terrifying moment you think that something has happened to Will. “Is everything okay?”
He stands before you, chest heaving and eyes red, and with two words your world comes crashing down. “We’re moving.”
Time stands still. You’re seventeen and your childhood is coming to a close.
Somehow you’re holding onto Jonathan as he explains everything through his tears. He’s moving in early September, going all the way to California. He and his family are leaving Hawkins, leaving you.
Your legs give out, or maybe it’s Jonathan’s, but you hold each other on the floor, intertwined, mourning the loss of growing up together. Your tears mix with his, his breathing becomes yours. The two of you cling onto each other, scared that one day soon you’ll never be able to do this again.
“We need to–” Your breathing is shaky, your eyes sting. You feel a desperate franticness claw out of you, you grasp at what little sanity you have left. “We need to promise each other that–that we’ll see each other every day before you leave, in some capacity. It–it doesn’t matter how but–”
“I’ve already talked to Nancy about it, bug.” Jonathan wipes your tears, lets his own fall freely. He knew you’d say this, and he loves you all the more for it. “It’s been agreed.”
You nod, relieved. It isn’t much, it still doesn’t change the fact that Jonathan will leave you in the end, but at least you’ll make every last second with him count. You’ll move into the Byers home if you have to, they’re your family. He’s your person. He’s embedded into your skin, he’s nestled between your bones.
Last year you and Jonathan promised you would never let go of each other.
The year prior to that you promised each other that nothing would change between you two.
Now, holding onto each other as the world you’ve been building together for five years comes crumbling down, you have to believe that the promises will be enough.
–
Steve and Robin rope you into helping them find a new job.
You innocently pointed out that Family Video was hiring, figuring it was an easy enough place to work at, and suddenly the two of them had shoved you into Steve’s car with resumes in their hands. Honestly, you should’ve seen it coming.
“You put your mom down as a reference?” Robin questions Steve as you all get out of the car. She had agreed to proofread it after you politely declined, stating that if you proofread anything Steve wrote, it might ruin your relationship.
“Yeah, why not?” Steve slams his door, straightens his shirt, and grabs your hand as you walk inside. “She’s like, super well respected.”
You share a look with Robin. “Rich kids,” you both groan at the same time. As much as you love Steve, you’ll neve quite get over how well connected he is. It’s bizarre and slightly terrifying how much the Harrington name can get you in this town.
“Whatever, call me a rich kid, but it’s my car you guys get free rides in.”
Robin rolls her eyes. “You’re such a dingus.”
“I didn’t ask to be here,” you remind Steve, though you thank him when he holds the store’s door open for you and Robin. “I think this could count as kidnapping.”
Robin bumps her hips against yours. “Not technically. Besides, I thought we agreed to leave our kidnapping days behind us after Erica?”
You shove the teen and follow her into the store. You look around at all the movies, slightly impressed. You’ve never really visited Family Video before, only really stopping by if you were picking up Dustin from the arcade next door. The store is nice, albeit small, but you can see Steve and Robin enjoying themselves. There’s good music, few customers, and the uniformed vest is less mortifying than Scoop’s small shorts and sailor hats. “It’s not so bad in here.”
“Why thank you, pretty lady.” A greasy looking man at the register smiles at you, leaning over it in a very unappealing manner. His name tag informs you that his name is Keith.
Steve immediately steps in front of you and stares the guy down. “She doesn’t need you thanking her, buddy.”
You can tell that he wants to say more, but you see the “general manager” on Keith’s name tag and quickly try to deescalate the situation. If your idiot boyfriend wants the job, he can’t piss off the guy hiring. “Steve, why don’t we take a look around while Robin does all the talking?”
“What–” He doesn’t have a chance to argue, you’re already pulling him down a random aisle, throwing a quick “good luck!” to Robin as you leave.
She talks with Keith, and it seems to be going well. She shows him their resumes, smiles at him kindly. before she shouts across the store to Steve. “Dingus, what are your three favorite movies?”
Steve nearly drops the movie he had been looking at. “Uh, Animal House?” You can practically hear Robin’s disappointed sigh from where you stand, and Keith looks unimpressed. Panicked, Steve whispers to you, “What are my favorite movies?”
“I don’t know!” You hiss, frantically trying to get this poor man a job. “Just, name two other movies. Animal House can’t be too bad, right?”
“Star Wars,” Steve manages to get out, now walking back to the register. You stand next to him, looking nervously at Robin, who makes a pained noise at his responses.
The manager stares blankly at him. “A New Hope?”
“A new what now?”
You drop your head into your hands and sigh. He’s hopeless. Already knowing it’s a lost cause, you mumble to him, “It’s a Star Wars movie, Steve.”
He snaps his fingers. “Right! Yeah, it’s the one with the teddy bears, isn’t it?” Steve makes what you think is supposed to be an Ewok sound, which only makes you sigh again. Sensing he’s fucked up, Steve tries to backtrack. “No? Uh… Oh! The one that just came out, the movie. The one with DeLorean and Alex P. Keaton and he’s trying to bang his mom.”
“Oh, dear.” It’s a trainwreck, one you can’t look away from, and Robin can only shake her head at you. “Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“Stop talking.”
“Uh, yeah.” Steve clears his throat, he knows he’s rambling. Had he known he would have a goddamn pop quiz about movies, he wouldn’t have dragged you here for the interview. “Those are my top three. Classics.”
Keith looks between you, Steve, and Robin. He points to Robin first, “You start Monday.” He points to Steve, “You start never.” And then he points to you, “You can start whenever.”
“Okay, I get why you’re telling me no,” Steve waves a hand in front of you, “but she didn’t even apply!”
You’re also confused by how this day is turning out, and you look at Robin, wide eyed and pleading. She’s good with people, Keith seems to like her. When she sees you silently begging her to fix this, Robin sighs and steps in front of Steve. “Will you just, um… Will you guys give us a minute?”
“Why?” Steve doesn’t move, and you want to throw a shoe at him.
“Let’s go, pretty boy.” You grab the back of his shirt and yank him back to the aisle of movies. He doesn’t fight you, he simply accepts his fate and allows you to drag him away. Before turning the corner, you nod at Keith. “Thanks for the job offer, but you should really give it to the guy I’m currently dragging.”
Robin snickers at Steve’s offended huff as the two of you leave, before she starts trying to convince the manager to let Steve work there. From where you stand, it seems like a heated discussion. You try to lean closer, nosey, and while you’re distracted, Steve runs into a life-sized cardboard cutout of Phoebe Cates wearing a red bikini.
He fights with it, tries desperately not to let it fall, all while his resume hangs from his mouth. “Shit! Oh, Fast Times! Ever heard of it? Top three for me, Keith.” Robin laughs and Steve turns the cardboard cutout to you, wiggling his eyebrows. “Own any red bikinis?”
You flick his forehead, though you laugh as well. “In your dreams.”
“I can sleep right now and find out–”
“I will flick you again.”
“A kiss is preferred, but whatever.”
–
When the Byers move, you spend the entire day fighting back tears as you help them pack.
You spent the night in Jonathan’s room, both of you dreading the morning to come. Neither of you had slept, instead spending the entire night taking turns sharing your favorite memories together. The day you met. The time a dog chased you. When Jonathan mistook your sweater for his and wore it to school. Late night drives. Movie nights with your brothers. You relive it all that night.
As the morning sunlight began to stream into Jonathan’s room, the warmth the memories brought started to fade away. Slowly, as the sun rose, you and Jonathan packed his room. You helped him organize his vinyls, sort through his mixtapes. When he isn’t looking, you steal a few t-shirts and flannels from his closet. He won’t notice they’re gone until he’s halfway to California.
When it gets too much, seeing all of Jonathan’s life dwindling down to only a few boxes, you wander into the living room and help Joyce pack as well. She sees the tears in your eyes and gives you things to do, but eventually you can’t take it anymore. You go into Will’s room, and it’s the same. You cry, he cries with you, and it’s bittersweet. The rooms empty, the boxes grow.
El’s room is the hardest to pack, she has so few items to call her own, and you’re both silent as you move through the room together.
With each box that you tape full of things you grew up with, you feel a piece of your childhood being packed away as well. The plates you used to eat off of, the books you used to bring from your job, the toys you passed down to Will. It’s all there, pieces of you frozen in time.
As you tape a box labeled “games” in Jonathan’s messy handwriting, you hear Max and Lucas singing in the living room. The sound makes you smile. It’s one of Max’s better days, she’s teasing Dustin for singing with Suzie, and she’s in a good mood. The rest of the party keeps her occupied. The kids all arrived as early as Joyce allowed them to, Nancy and Mike were the first to knock on the door.
You place the box next to the others and walk towards Jonathan’s room. He’s leaning against its door frame with Nancy beside him, and you join them. You stare at the empty room, the one you’ve called your second home ever since you were twelve. It hurts, seeing it stripped of everything.
All of Jonathan’s boxes are in the living room, filled with the things that make him who he is. There’s a drawer in your room of things Jonathan has left over the years, and you’re never giving them back. They’re all you have left of him.
You and Jonathan take in his barren room, and you sigh against the door frame. “It’s so… empty.”
Nancy crosses her arms. “Is that everything?”
“I guess so,” Jonathan stuffs his hands in his pockets. His room feels cold somehow, its emptiness devoids it of the warmth it once had. He can still hear your laughs echoing in the floorboards, he can still smell your perfume that clings onto the walls. There’s scuff on the closet door from the time the two of you thought it’d be a good idea to play blind-folded baseball in the small room.
Jonathan steps into his room, taking it all one last time. The sunlight from his window illuminates his silhouette, making him appear even smaller within the room. “Seventeen years of my life… packed up in one day.”
His voice is melancholic, his body is sad. You nudge Nancy, nod your head in Jonathan’s direction, urging her to go after him. She nods, understands that you’re telling her to say goodbye, giving them the space to do so. She smiles at you appreciatively.
You do it because they love each other, but selfishly a part of you leaves because you can’t say goodbye just yet.
“Thank you,” she whispers, following after Jonathan.
You find El as she’s leaving Joyce’s room. She’s holding a piece of paper, clutched closely to her chest. There are tears in her eyes, though you know better than to ask why. It’s a sad day for everyone, you’ll let her grieve on her own. However, that doesn’t stop you from pulling the girl into a fierce hug.
“I’ll miss you so much, sweetheart.” You mumble, kissing the top of her head. “I don’t know who’s going to paint my nails now.”
El laughs through her tears and holds you tight. “I can ask Mike to.”
You kiss her head again, close your eyes, and pray to whoever is above that this girl will stay who she is forever. That she will never change. Her kindness is genuine, her joy is admirable. All her life she only knew cruelty, and yet she still came out of it so full of love. “I’d love to hear how that goes.”
“I will write you,” El promises, and you nod eagerly at her. She pulls you in for one last hug before finally releasing you to go see Joyce.
The woman greets you with a tired smile when you walk into her room. She’s kneeling on the floor, folding clothes. They’re baggier than what she normally wears, darker, and you finally realize that they’re Hopper’s.
A lump forms in your throat. She shouldn’t be doing this alone, packing away the remnants of his life. “Here, let me help.”
Joyce accepts, and together you sit in comfortable silence as you go through the clothes Hopper left behind. They still smell like him, old cigarettes and whiskey. It’s a nostalgic scene, a part of you wishes you could keep one of his shirts. He had been dear to you, regardless of the constant bickering you faced with him.
“I don’t blame you, you know.” Joyce speaks softly next to you, catching your attention. “At all.”
You look up at her, sucking in a breath. “I don’t… I don’t know what you mean, Mrs. Byers.”
“The guilt, honey.” She places a hand on your arm, gentle as she always is with you. “I know you blame yourself for what happened to Will, but you shouldn’t. You have to let go of it. I want…” Joyce pauses, looks into your eyes the way a mother does to her daughter. “I want you to promise me that you’ll live the life that you deserve, because you’ve spent half of your life making sure my boys lived the lives that they deserved. Can you do that for me?”
“I…” You’re crying, you don’t know what to say. For years you’ve carried the guilt of Will’s disappearance, and for even longer you’ve done everything you could to ensure that he was loved. That Jonathan was loved. Never once had it felt like a burden to you, but Joyce’s words undoes something in you. “I promise.”
Joyce pulls you into her arms and hugs you, tears in her own eyes. She strokes your hair, hugs you as she’s always done since you were a little girl. She echoes the final words that Hopper told you. “You’re the best of them.”
You’re not sure how long you cry in Joyce’s arms, but when she soothes you and wipes your tears away, she tells you to go find Will. They’re leaving soon, he’ll want to see you, and you wish the woman one final goodbye before going to find her son.
Will ends up being in the hallway, you find him just after he’s said goodbye to Mike. You note the longing in his eyes, the uncertainty in his posture as his friend leaves. There’s a wistful look on his face, one that you once had on your own when Jonathan was around. Even if Will may not know yet, you do.
“Hey, little bee.”
He turns around, the softness in his eyes when he sees you makes you homesick. “Y/N!”
Will buries his face in your chest, and you hug him just as tightly back. He’s grown so much since you first met him. He’s no longer the shy little boy who had been afraid of his own shadow, and you can’t believe you won’t get to finish watching him grow up. “I swear, you’re going to be taller than me next time I see you. Won’t be able to call you little bee anymore.”
“I’ll always be your little bee,” Will squeezes you tighter, afraid to let go of you.
“Good,” you ruffle his hair, making him to laugh. “I’ll miss you, but I’m sure you already know that.”
“I’ll miss you, too.” Will’s voice is wet, more tears come. He pulls away from you, he looks as if he wants to say something, but he stops himself. As if he’s afraid of something.
You frown. “Hey, what is it?”
“I’m scared,” The words rush from his mouth. “What if… What if I don’t make any friends?” He lowers his voice, looks around nervously, before trusting to say the words out loud to you. “I–I’m different, Y/N.”
Will’s fear hurts you to see, you wish you could do more, promise him that it will all be okay, but you can’t. Instead, all you can do is kiss his cheek and hope he can feel all the love you have for him within it. All you can do is remind him that you will love him through it all. “You’re the bravest kid I know. I have no doubt that you’ll be fine. I mean, you’ll have Jonathan and El with you, but if you ever need me, I’m just a phone call away. I love you, and that will never change.”
You stroke the boy’s cheek with your finger, and he leans into the gentle touch. “I’m rooting for you, always.”
Will squeezes you tight when he hugs you for the last time. He thanks you, his body relaxes into yours, and you know that in the end he’ll be okay. He’s a brilliant kid, he’s been through more than anyone else his age ever has. He’s resilient, his kindness is his strength, you just hope that he can recognize that himself one day.
As you pull away from the hug, Will’s eyes catch on someone, you turn around. It’s Jonathan, standing by the front door, waiting for you.
It’s time to say goodbye.
Taking a deep breath, you walk towards him, and Jonathan takes your hand and guides you to the porch outside. Everyone else is still inside, packing. You sit side by side in silence, absorbing the final remaining moments alone with each other. Saying goodbye to your childhood best friend leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.
A ladybug crawls on a leaf next to you, a bee flies past you and lands on a sunflower nearby, and a bird chirps in the blue sky above. You rest your head on Jonathan’s shoulder, he presses a kiss to your temple. Your fingers interlock and the cool September air surrounds you.
“I made you something,” Jonathan breathes out, clears his throat. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a mixtape, its front covered with a piece of paper listing all the songs on it. “I, uh, used the money I won from the betting pool to make it. Dustin was pretty annoyed with me for winning.”
You snort at the image of your brother berating your friend for winning a betting pool about how long it’d take Steve to ask you out. Taking the mixtape from Jonathan, you read the songs. There’s eight songs on it, the first one being a Beatles song from your childhood; you don’t know how Jonathan knew that. Though most of them are familiar, the writing on the paper is old, faded with age. “How long have you been making this, bee?”
Jonathan looks away from you and swallows. “A while, I guess. Listen to it after I leave, okay? That way, if you hate it, I’ll never have to know.” His demeanor is odd, there’s something he’s not telling you, but it’s your last day with him. You leave it alone for now, not wanting to ruin it.
“You’re not allowed to find a new best friend.” You tell him instead, the silence becoming too much to bear. It’s a joke, though truthfully you don’t want Jonathan to find another best friend. He’s supposed to be yours, only yours, and you’re supposed to be his.
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Jonathan lets out a soft laugh, and you’re going to miss feeling the way his body moves as he does so. He sucks in a breath, releases it slowly, and shakes his head. “I mean, we were kids together, bug.”
You start to cry, and he does as well. You’ve never had to say goodbye to each other before. Not like this. The two of you sit on the porch of Jonathan’s childhood home and cry. You cry into his neck, he buries his face into your hair, and it’s all so unfair.
Jonathan touches his forehead to yours. You look into his eyes and know that your childhood will always live within him, and his within you. Jonathan brings his finger up to your bee necklace, his ladybug ring knocks against the pendant. The jewelry glistens in the sunlight.
“Bee, we were more than just kids together.”
And it’s true. You were everything together. Now, you have to figure out how to be everything while apart.
–
The last of the boxes are placed in the moving van. Everyone is crying, you’re all gathered around one another, hugging and saying goodbye.
You hold El tight and whisper good luck to her. You remind Will that everything will be okay, knowing how scared he’s been of high school and remorseful that he has to do it all alone. The kids all cry as they share the final hugs, Jonathan and Nancy cry as they hold one another. Everyone says goodbye, and you watch them with tears in your eyes. You turn to Joyce to kiss her cheek, but she grabs your arm instead.
“Remember what you promised me, okay?” She catches your eye, makes sure you hear what she’s telling you. “Live the life that you deserve.”
“I will,” you exhale, and she seems content with that. Joyce hugs you, kisses your cheek, and you tell her to drive safe as she gets into the van.
Jonathan stands by his car, waiting for you, and you pull the boy into your arms. He crashes against you, clutches you to his chest, and you breathe him in one final time. “I’ll always love you the most, bee.”
“And I’ll always love you the most, bug.”
Joyce drives away first, El in the van with her, before Jonathan and Will follow. The car pulls out of its driveway one final time, and you hold Nancy’s hand as you both cry. Slowly, their cars fade into the distance, and one by one the kids hop on their bikes and pedal away. No one wants to stay, the empty house feels too permanent, solemn. Eventually Nancy gets into her own car, wishing you a quiet goodbye, until it’s just you and your brother standing in front of the house.
Dustin stays beside you, as he always does, and you take a deep breath. Nothing will ever be the same again.
You take one last look at the Byers home, the house you grew up in and discovered pure love and joy and naivety in, and inhale the final scent of your childhood. Dandelions are in bloom, its yellow surrounds the home, soon they will wilt and its seeds will litter the sky
Joyce’s words ring in your head.
It’s time to live the life that you deserve. You’re on your own now, though you know that really you aren’t. Dustin is next to you, Steve and Robin are waiting at your house with movies stolen from work because they knew how hard today would be. Your mother has your favorite cookies ready and waiting for you. Mike and the others have already planned their first letter to Will.
The charm bracelet from the party and Steve is cool against your wrist.
You’re no longer the scared, angry twelve year old you had been when you first moved to Hawkins. You’re loved, you have so many incredible people in your life who now get to watch you grow up into someone new.
Slowly, you exhale your childhood, with a single promise of keeping it within you forever. To live the life that Joyce has told you that you deserve.
And you believe her.
[END OF SEASON THREE]
-
⌑ series masterlist
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#steve harrington x henderson!reader#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#stranger things#steve harrington fanfic#stranger things rewrite#slowburn#angst#nya#m's writing#WE HERE !!!!#ONE MORE CHAPTER LEFT#THEN WE ONTO FOUR !!!
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# SHE WAS CRYIN' ON MY SHOULDER, ALL I COULD DO WAS HOLD HER
pairing: paige bueckers x ex-gf!reader
word count: 851
warnings: arguing, crying, mentions of abandonment/past relationship
summary: you and paige both have things you need to get off your chests one year after you break up.
⭑ from lani: to that anon i told my next fic would be for kate im so sorry 😭 i was crying to this song earlier and i just needed to write paige to it - so heres my first ever angst fic i hope its not horrible 😛
masterlist !
"Y/N, YOU LEFT me, remember? you left!"
"you didn't even bother to stop me, to fight for me- for us!"
neither of you knew how this escalated so quickly. how a friendly reunion turned into a screaming match.
"it's not my job to pick up the pieces of the shit you broke! so i'm sorry if i didn't feel like working myself over for someone who had no issue leaving."
you know her apology is insincere, sarcastic. but for a split second when you hear her say "i'm sorry," your heart aches for the words you've spent the past year mourning.
"paige," you sigh, trying to calm down before you say something you don't mean, "i know it seems like it, but i did not want to leave the way i did. i didn't have a choice."
"bullshit-"
"can you just be quiet and let me talk?" you snap, immediately shutting her up, "last summer when i disappeared, it was because of my parents. they forced me to come home to them even after i told them i wanted to stay here in connecticut. i swear to you, paige, i fought for us. you didn't see it but i went through hell fighting. and i'm sorry for ending it the way i did but, paige...we were bound to end it at some point. we both knew that. i had to go home eventually."
you both had tears streaming down your faces at this point, chests heaving from not being able to breathe properly.
you stood in front of paige, slowly pacing back and forth as she sat with her arms crossed on the cold park bench absorbing your words.
the darkness of the night engulfed the atmosphere, contributing to the inevitable breaking of your once-intertwined hearts. the only light was dim from the far away lamp post, rusting away from its former beauty - similarly to how you and paige used to be a work of art together, but were now nothing more than a mess of spilled emotions and pent-up grudges.
"and i understand that, y/n, but i deserved an explanation- a goodbye, at the very least. or at least i thought i deserved that."
"don't do that," you challenge, referring to the way she degraded herself in front of you, "is that why you didn't try? to save us?"
"why else wouldn't i? i thought you hated me, i thought-" she pauses to catch her breath and wipe some of the tears that had fallen on her pink lips, "i thought you didn't care about us. as if that summer didn't mean shit to you."
"paige i-"
"no, now it's your turn to listen," she demands, pulling you to sit next to her on the bench, both of her cold hands holding yours, "i never felt so strongly about someone the way i felt about you. i couldn't imagine spending my time away from you, i mean, it literally hurt. so i took advantage of that summer, i took advantage of the little time we had together. and then when i found out you left without a word to me, it broke me. and i know you didn't see it but ask literally any of my friends. i didn't get out of bed for days in a row. i didn't eat, i didn't practice, nothing. it was like you stole the good parts of me, took it, and ran. i needed you, y/n, but you were on the other side of the country. what am i supposed to do with that?"
she's full on sobbing now, shoulders shaking as she doesn't even try to hold in her tears now. you swear you can hear cracks in your own heart and bones forming as she confesses what she went through.
you can't bear watching her suffer anymore, tightly wrapping your arms around her shaking frame. hugs like these were second nature, but this time was different. there was more meaning behind it.
your embrace acted as a shield against any future problems that were to be thrown onto your paths. your embrace acted as a glue repairing the broken pieces of your relationship that laid destroyed for the past how many days. your embrace acted as a genuine embrace.
"paige, i'm so sorry. i'm so sorry, baby, i never wanted to leave you, you have to know that. i'm so sorry," you whisper into her hair.
one of your hands stroke her head buried in your neck. you feel her tears drip onto your thin jacket, soaking you with guilt as it hits you how desperate you were to spend the rest of your life making it up to this girl.
it was clear to you that she actually did care, unlike how you thought last summer. and because of how she was crying on your shoulder, you needed to forget about that version of her you spent so long hating - the version that constantly haunted the back of your mind.
you needed to hold her. and hold her. and hold her. and never let go.
— leilani signing off ! 📁
#leilanihours#laniwrites#paige bueckers#paige buckets#paige buckers angst#paige bueckers x reader#uconn#uconn wbb#wbb#wcbb#music#billie eilish#hit me hard and soft#wildflower#angst#x reader#fanfic#lgbtq#wlw#Spotify
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Dating Yoongi
We've finally got the dating Yoongi headcanons!! I'm sorry it took so long but boy is it lengthy so strap in. this is not proofread and im fucking exhausted so edits to be done eventually. if you enjoy reblog, like and leave a comment. cw: does contain smut and one kys moment
Your meet cute with Yoongi ended up being more of a meet awkward than anything. It was 3am at one of the many random convenience stores in Gangnam and you were exhausted, exhausted and hungry. You were doing a year in Seoul for your major and the timezones were really fucking you up. Puffy sleepy eyes,glasses on and a sleep mask resting on your forehead made quite the picture.
It was also quite the picture when you ran into a rack of honey butter chips and wiped out on the floor.
Full wipeout.
Legs up,gravity turned on its head wiped out.
Thankfully the only thing wounded was your pride, but you kinda wished you knocked yourself out so you couldn’t see the handsome man towering over laughing so hard his eyes practically disappeared and a gummy smile on his face. He had a cup of ice and one of those americano packets balanced in one hand and a helmet dangling in his other.
“...chana?”
“Huh?”you said in a daze.
“Gwaenchana?”he purred in a low rumble. He looked at your lost expression and sucked in a breath.
“Are you okay?”It was a little clunky and half mumbled but you didn’t want to put this man through any more mental torment so you nodded quickly.
“Ne, na gwaenchana!”you replied and quickly scrambled to your feet, almost falling once again because your ankle decided now was the time to roll. He quickly reached out and steadied you, looking at you with so much bewilderment the whole situation felt comical. He looked at the hand that still rested on your arm and quickly pulled it away, you swear you saw his pale cheeks turn pink.
“Um…”he rumbled, looking at you with weary eyes. “stay”
You nodded with wide eyes as you watched this random man run around the convenience store and come back with a juice box and a random red pouch. He looked at you and held up each one.
“Bae juice”
He held up the red pouch. “Hong sam jelly for sukchwi…one moment”
He pulled out his phone and typed quickly. He held the phone to his ear and hummed.
“For hangover”he said, pointing to the two items again. Your eyes widened and you shook your head rapidly. You weren’t drunk. He definitely misinterpreted the situation and just smiled, giving you a smile and waving goodbye before disappearing into the night.
And what do you do when a pretty man buys you pear juice and ginseng jelly in a foreign country?
You fucking c o n s u m e it.
And the next morning when you woke up late to your 8:00am lecture, you just blamed the crazy night because wow what the fuck happened.
You spent the rest of your classes thinking about that handsome stranger. Maybe you did hit your head because WHY didn’t you ask for his name or his katalk? You could have done the whole ‘oh handsome young man, I need to pay you back’ kinda schtick but your brain decided to cosplay the very first windows computer and blue screen the minute you looked at him. stupid.
“Stupid” you groaned, trudging back to your dorm. You had been blessed—got accommodations—for a single room so it was just you and your twin sized
Oh yeah, and your pining.
Couldn’t forget about your pining.
You needed a drink. A good drink,some good food and some cartoons to get your mind off this random man. Within minutes you had a bottle of soju and a hefty platter of tteokbokki on the way. Maybe you’d go out for bingsu sometime this week with the girls from your lecture. They were sweet and treated you just like anyone else despite the racial and cultural differences, doting on you as their new maknae and always making sure you ate between classes. It was nice to be looked out for so thoroughly, especially when you were so far away from home. You pulled your phone out to text them when you got a notification that your delivery driver was already on the way.
Huh. they were already earning themself a tip. You stood eagerly by the door waiting and even though you were watching the app like a hawk, you jumped when the doorbell rang and scrambled to open it.
“Gamsahab-”you looked up and saw a familiar set of eyes. “...-nida”
“Soju?”he raises his brow in a way that says ‘again?’. You felt your face grow hot and shook your head rapidly. He just smirked and handed over your takeout bags.
Once again you fucked up,blanked and forgot to ask for his name.
Damn pretty boy with his pretty eyes and his stupid smile.
It was months before you had seen him again.
Time heals all wounds and you began to move on. You hung out more with your friends, went to karaoke,saw the sights of Seoul and slowly but surely felt yourself moving on.
It was on a rainy day in May where you found yourself at your usual convenience store. The weather went from sunny skies to torrential downpour within minutes and you had just gotten your hair done. You were looking for an umbrella but found yourself in the snack aisle.
Blame it on the wind.
What you didn’t expect to find in the snack aisle were seven men bickering.
You kinda just stood like 🧍🏾♀️ until one of them finally turned and god he was stunning
“Yah, Yoongi-yah!! Move and let this lady through!”
The ‘Yoongi’ in question quickly scooted out of the way, mumbling about how they were all in the way.
That mumble…
“Yoongi..”you whispered before you could even stop yourself. His gaze snapped up and for once you caught him off guard. His eyes flitted over you rapidly and his mouth opened and shut like a nutcracker.
“Soju girl,”he whispered. Then the moment was lost.
"na iroumi aniya(that’s not my name)” you huffed in annoyance. You know there was an honorific you were supposed to use somewhere in that sentence but your point still stood.
“You speak Korean”another boy said and god he was tall.
“Yes I speak Korean”you said, tilting your head up at him.
“Hyung, you said soju girl couldn’t speak Korean!”a voice laughs. You squint your eyes at this Yoongi who seemingly wanted the floor to swallow him whole. He stared at you like he had seen a ghost actually which wasn’t making things much better. The tall boy sighed and took a step forward, bowing even.
“I apologize for my hyung,”he said solemnly. “He’s usually not this dumb. I’m Kim Namjoon and these are my bandmates. What’s your name?”
You smiled and returned the bow, happy to finally have some familiarity, both language and warmth.
“I’m y/n”you said. “I think me and your hyung have some catching up to do”
Yes, to say it was a meet awkward was the nicest way to put it.
It was a fucking train wreck of events if you were being completely honest.
You had exchanged info with Namjoon seeing as he spoke the most English and was the only one who didn’t 👁️👄👁️ at you which was nice and had quickly become good friends with one another.
Seeing that their leader liked you, the rest of the boys quickly followed suit and you suddenly had a much bigger friend group than you could even imagine.
Yoongi had become a lot more reserved in a way that was off putting to say the least. You’d only ever spoken to him twice before but there was something off.
you’d asked Namjoon about it during one of your study/music/kill each other from frustration sections and he just shrugged mumbling something about ‘hyung being busy’
you rolled your eyes and grabbed your stuff to find out yourself. That’s what you get for asking a dumbass.
Yoongi had been exactly where you’d expect him to be, crammed into one of the practice rooms with his headphones and laptop.
“Yoongi,” you said, tapping on his shoulder. He spun around in a startle and looked at you with a relieved sigh.
“Oh god”he breathed out, “I thought you were one of the maknae begging for food”
You couldn’t help but to smile, all the prior annoyance melting out of your pores and back to the depths of hell where they belonged. Talking to Yoongi was easy, that is when he was still talking to you.
“How do you know I'm not begging for food?”you smirked, taking a seat on the lumpy couch.
“Well, are you?”he asked, raising a brow. You shook your head and leaned back into the couch.
“You’re off the hook”you said, “but I do have a question” “Which is?” “Why have you been avoiding me lately?”
The room grew silent enough you could hear a pin drop. Cornered was the only way you could describe Yoongi. His shoulders scrunched up and he seemed to fold in on himself.
“No reason,”he said plainly.
Your eyes narrowed.
“So you have been avoiding me?”
His eyes widened.
“That’s not what I meant-”
“Then what did you mean?”you asked. Your patience was wearing thin and your heart was racing something ugly.
“I was trying to give you space”
“Space for what? I didn’t ask for space!”you snapped.
“Space for you and Namjoon!”he snapped back, folding his arms over his chest.
“Me and Namjoon?”you gagged. “The last thing me and Namjoon need is space, please collect your dongsaeng cause he won’t leave me alone!”
“Well he’s your boyfriend!”Yoongi threw back.
Huh.
“Huh?!”You shrieked.
“It doesn’t take a genius to find out,”Yoongi continued, rolling his eyes. “So you can drop the naive act”
“Naive act—Yoongi, you think I'm dating Namjoon?”you asked. You felt like you were going to be sick. Namjoon wasn’t bad by any means, he was just so older brother coded it was disgusting.
“I don't think, I know,”he said. “You guys spend all your time together,you go on dates,you take naps together; it’s obvious”
“Well since you’re such a genius”You said, “How come you couldn’t tell that i’m in love with you?”
Huh.
“Huh?”he said, spinning around in his chair to fully face you. You ran a hand over your face and honest to god laughed.
“Idiots”you said in disbelief. “You’re all idiots”
“Hey-”
“I've been pining over you for months and this whole time you think i’ve been dating Namjoon”you said, shaking your head.
“You’ve been what?”Yoongi said.
“Crushing on you”you emphasized, “You idiot”
“i..I don’t know what to say,”he said. You sighed and fully leaned back against the chair, feeling all the blood rush to your head from your bold confession. This isn’t how this was supposed to go.
“You can let me down gently for starters”you chuckled humorlessly.
“Let you down—what are you talking about?”he asked.
“Just reject me already!”You exclaimed, waving your hands frantically. You felt like a madwoman.
“Why would I reject you?”his eyebrows furrowed.
You were going to be sick.
“I’m going to be sick”you laughed, running your hands over your face and god were you crying?
“Why are you crying?”he rumbled softly, leaning in and wiping the tears off your cheeks. You just laughed harder, but that ended up turning into a sob because you were so tired. You weren’t expecting a fairytale but this wasn’t the turn you thought today would take. You felt yourself being pulled closer and you knew you should pull away, you knew better. It was all too much and he would just hurt you, but his hoodie smelled like coffee. His hoodie smelled like coffee and his hands were warm as they wrapped around you. You always wondered if he ran hot or cold, but he was neither; Yoongi was pleasantly warm. His hand had somehow wriggled between the two of you and rested on your cheek, rubbing the streaks where your tears trailed. His breath rose and fell in a steady rhythm and for a moment you felt weighless.
“What a mess, huh?”he mumbled, tracing his thumb over your temple. “I went and made all these assumptions…because I was afraid to say I love you”
“You love me?”you whispered.
“Mm”he rumbled in affirmation. “You didn’t know?”
“No”you said, keeping your voice low, scared if you spoke too loud, the moment would disappear.
“I thought I was being obvious,”he said.
“I thought I was being obvious,”you said. You pulled your head back to look at Yoongi and that gummy smile was on full display.
“We’re both idiots”
Actually dating Yoongi went much smoother than the confession process.
In the early days, the two of you spent a lot of time in the genius studio doing parallel play, you’d work on your assignments and he would work on music.
Obviously with many interruptions from the maknae line + hoseok, occasionally being prodded by Seokjin and Namjoon to eat,drink and get fresh air
Y’all needed to touch grass and they were sick of it
Being so close to the band in their early days formed an immeasurable bond between you all
But it also lead to a lot of sacrifices on your part that you weren’t prepared to make.
There was the obvious like no posting about the boys on social media,nda’s up the wazoo,etc. This was all expected and you were willing to do so.
What you weren’t prepared for was how cruel the kmedia could truly be. You weren’t from here, you were a foreigner and that already put a target on your back. The fact that you weren’t thin or pale didn’t help one bit either.
Thankfully, the boys and Yoongi reassured you in private. Namjoon did damage control and argued with the company to do more on your behalf, while Jimin and the maknae stood by your side like bodyguards wherever you went in silent solidarity. You were never alone. Jin dropped you off at university in the morning, along with Jungkook. Scolding the two of you to have a good day and to eat something that wasn’t chips. Naturally, Jungkook would bring you back once your classes were done and continued to gripe that even though he was older than you, he was still stuck in highschool.
You still hold this over his head to this date.
So thankfully, you had support. Support that if you didn’t have you weren’t sure where you would be honestly. It really felt like you all had become a little family, and being so far from home that was something you desperately needed.
Once the group got larger and was in a more stable position you better believe they all stopped holding their tongues, especially Yoongi. He could be a little hard to read at times but you were not expecting him to be getting himself into full on twitter wars on a burner account over you 💀
“Yoongi stop telling people to kill themselves”
“No”
Being in love with Yoongi felt easy, it was natural. He continued to take care of you in little ways whether it was packing your lunch,giving you transit fare or rubbing your temples when you were tired and falling asleep on him.
Our mans is definitely about that acts of service life. He loves quietly.
Pda made him want to die just a little inside but he wasn’t opposed to holding your hand. It wasn’t like he had anything to hide anyways, you guys were already public.
He wasn’t the jealous type and although he’d never admit it, he loved how much you and the boys love each other. He’s got a bunch of pictures on his phone of you just in the dorms being domestic. You spent more time there than you did in your own dorm room.
So although he doesn’t say it often, he shows it with every part of his being. The way his eyes sparkle when he sees you in the morning, his proud smile in your graduation photos. It also made his heart flutter that you got his dry humor and you dished it right back to him, smack in the middle of the maknae line teasing him and Jin about being old.
And when you learned Daegu Satoori from Taehyung to surprise him? Namjoon had to hold him back from proposing on the spot. And to think he ever thought you and Namjoon were dating.
Yoongi bits ✨tid bits about you and yoongi ✨
Yes Yoongi genuinely thought you were drunk and he wasn’t flirting(he got that nuerodivergent rizz)
When Yoongi told you the mint hair wasn’t real and washed it out you cried 🧍🏾♀️
You guys have two apartments together, one near Hybe and one in Daegu. You both prefer the apartment in Daegu because that means Holly gets to stay with you guys.
Everytime a new design for shooky it mysteriously appears in the apartment.
You guys have two cats per your request(a white one named sugar and a black one named gloss) the things Yoongi does for love
You guys have been happily engaged for the past year and he proposed in the most unromantic way possible
NSFW
Baby, Yoongi is a switch with a capital S
Now I have never met a non kinky neurodivergent person and Yoongi is no exception. He enjoys a good power dynamic and has definitely explored kink in the past with previous partners so he’s experienced.
But Yoongi does occasionally just like to fuck, no rules no dynamics. Just vanilla sex
He’s a lot softer than his image and he honestly likes the separation between the two for his own sanity. The fans think he’s this no nonsense hardass, but he’d much rather praise and reward you than dole out punishments.
He’s a softie at heart and finds a bit of bratty behavior to be cute so you can definitely get away with a lot. Not to say he’s a complete pushover but he definitely will let a good amount of back talk slide before he puts you in your place. It's almost infuriating how calm he is if you’re the type that brats in hopes of a punishment. He’ll just look at you and laugh about how cute you’re being before returning back to whatever he was doing.
It’s pretty hard to tick him off but also not impossible, the easiest way to get him to snap is to mess with him in the studio; especially if he has a deadline coming up. That's how you end up on your knees crammed under his desk not even allowed to suck his dick but just sit there and keep it warm while he works. The condescending mumbles and coos he lets out while stroking your head is enough to send you careening straight into subspace. “Just needed something in your mouth, huh?”he’d purr and gently drag his nails across your scalp
Tongue technology. We all know about it, but you get to experience this first hand at your beck and call. Yoongi is the first one to admit you’re spoiled and when you’re not being a brat, all you have to do is ask and he’ll be in between your legs. He could and has spent hours down there teasing your folds and giving you orgasm after orgasm until you can’t take it anymore.
Somnophilia. This is a kink that goes both ways for you guys but honestly he finds it really hot when you take what you need from him. Waking up groggy in the middle of the night to you fucking yourself on his cock is one of the quickest ways to get Yoongi whining and gripping the sheets. Bonus points if you tie his hands up or cuff them to the bed posts.
He’s not really a fan of quickies and prefers to take his time, but he’s not opposed to shoving you into a closet and getting you off on his fingers if you’re getting needy. He just wants to take care of his girl.
Speaking of his hands, they end up around your throat and in your mouth quite often. Whether you’re sucking or gagging on them, Yoongi makes good on this little fixation and makes sure you get your fill.
He’s down to being pegged. Somebody had to say it guys,🗣️ Yoongi wants something up his ass ‼️
Whether you have him bent over a table or you’re tied up and he’s riding you, Yoongi does enjoy penetration and he’s not ashamed of it. He likes how dazed and pliant you get when he’s bouncing on your strap all flushed and pink and whining. it’s a rush to his head and sends him over the edge faster than he can get a hand on himself.
He’s a fan of cozy aftercare and pillow talk. After you’ve both cleaned up and the bed is moderately clean, he’s off in the kitchen getting snacks and water so you two can cuddle and recap what you liked and disliked. He gets really affectionate after he cums so it usually dissolves into him mumbling praises and kissing all over your face before falling asleep.
All in all Yoongi is the best boy.
#yoongi headcanons#yoongi fanfic#yoongi fluff#Yoongi smut#bts headcanons#bts hard thoughts#bts hard hours#min yoongi x reader#min yoongi smut#bts min yoongi#bts fanfic#bts yoongi#yoongi drabble#min yoongi
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2014 part two
Leah Williamson x Reader Warnings: Short
Your buzzing, quit literally vibrating in your seat as your family pull into medow park. "God Y/n will you stop moving." You nod "Sorry im just really excited this is all shes ever wanted." Leah's making her debut, Leah's making her debut for Arsenal. Something you will achive in three years, you wont be able to contain your nerves then, but for now you stop moving as you get out of the car and wait impatinelty for your fmily to follow suit.
Amanda had called last letting you guys know that they were coming back from london early as Leah had been chosen for todays senior squad, Leah, your leah was going to make her senior debut. Countless hours spent kicking a ball around the garden, imaginary crowds cheering her name, had culminated in this very moment.
You stay antsy the entire way through the match until the fourth offical holds up number fourteen and you watch as Leah shakes out her legs on the sideline, shes nervous you know that, your sure have the stadium knows that but what they don't know, what you don't know is that when she looks to the stand, when she sees you there absolute vibrating in your seat with excitement, the widest smile shes ever seen her nerves disappear, you belive in her, you have told her over and over again and the look on your face right now tells her ypu believe in her now and so she lets out a breath and makes her way onto the pitch for the first time for the Arsenal, for the senior squad.
You stand down at the barrier at the end of the match and wait for Leah to come over, you watch as she hugs her parents and Gran, her cousins, aunties and uncles and the Jacob and you stand beside him ready to tell her how amazing she was, how amazing she always has been, only you don't get to. "Leah." Alex Scott is standing behind Leah pulling on her jersey slightly "Come on you want that photo don't you." And with that shes gone.
You expect to see her at the party the willamsons through for her later that night but shes a very popular person, she's always been a very popular person. You watch as she mingles with her friends, family and teamates old and new, you watch as her cheeks reden and she picks at her hands as she talks to a girl, a girl who's face you cant see, a girl who will sweep leah off her feet as you get sweeped off your own by him, a girl who will replace you on the Williamson family holiday as they clash with his family holiday.
You leave shortly after saying goodbye to Jacob and the rest of the Williamson family, not Leah though, now you cant find her at all, not like she seemed to notice you were there in the first place. You have training tomorrow and if you want to follow her to the senior squad of Arsenal (three years, you'll make it in three years), of any team, you have to practice, to train, to go to bed early to get up early to repeat it all again and again to make it.
Your proud of her even if you never got to tell her, the same way she won't get to tell you when you finally make it, you'll be to wrapped up in him, around him.
#woso#woso fanfics#awfc#woso one shot#woso imagine#leah williamson#leah williamson x y/n#leah williamson imagine#leah williamson x reader#leah williamson x you#mysunshinetemptress#woso community#woso x reader#mysunshinetemptressasks#woso soccer#woso couples#woso blurbs#2005#2007#2014 part two#2014#2010
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was struck suddenly by this thought
okay biker!simon but he's got his shit together and he's hubby and you have a kid (2yo?) with him
in India, bikes are the primary mode of transport everyone has one and lots of the kids love love going on rides. my 2nd cousin (?) (relations are diff there) he's 2 years old and he's the cutest thing in the world and he will not sleep at night until his dad takes him out for a spin on the bike. he comes back all smiley and sleepy it's so fucking cute omfg
IMAGINE THAT WITH SIMON
( bikes aren't seen as dangerous in India bc literally every household has one and people will carry their babies on the bike. ik it's different elsewhere but I just cannot stop thinking ab simon going for a spin with his baby :((( )
love you, drink water sunny 👊
ur cousin not sleeping till he gets a ride is so cute omg :((( such a cutie pie 🥺
but no absolutely!! i feel like biker!simon would spoil his kids sm that they get demanding when he doesn’t get to take them out on a ride
thinking about your little two year old girl waiting patiently in the living room while her dad washes up (simon closed the shop today), with her little helmet already strapped in. the tv is on for reruns of cartoons but she’s distracted, squirming at every drop of sound, thinking it’s simon finally out of the shower.
you chuckle as you rub her back, trying to make her calm down, but you guess her exhaustion and excitement are finally mixing, making one whiny baby. you pitch forward to press a kiss on her little fist.
that, at least, makes her look at you.
“excited, little pea?” you ask, brushing your thumb on the apple of her cheek.
“mhmm!” she says before turning back to her cartoons.
what a blessing she is.
simon pops out of the corner just then, crooning, “ready to go, peanut?”
your daughter squeals, scrambling to get off the couch to run towards simon. simon laughs, crouching down and opening his arms to embrace her, but she’s barrelling into him too fast, unable to stop, and it knocks her helmet against his chin.
“jesus–”
“daddy, go!” is all what your daughter says, so impatient and spoiled, and simon just coos again, finding no fault in her little demands.
“of course, of course.” he stands up. “let’s say bye to mommy?”
you stand then too, moving close to them carefully. your beloved angel turns at hearing simon’s words, her pudgy cheeks now rounder with her smile. “buh-bye!”
“bye bye, darlin’,” you reply, kissing her little fist again. “have fun with daddy, yeah? tell him to ride carefully because he’s got my whole world with him.” this you say to simon, playful and teasing.
simon scrunches his nose in reply—fatherhood looks so beautiful in him.
“don’t worry, love. y’know i’ll do everything to keep her safe,” he murmurs, pressing close to breathe you in. “we’ll be home in twenty. see you then.”
you kiss his jaw. “see you then, baby.”
your little angel waves her goodbyes again before they disappear to the garage, simon’s quiet murmurs filling up the space while your daughter hums in replies, still not yet ready for much words.
simon hefts himself up and places her in front of him, making sure that her helmet is secured and her jacket’s all zipped up. it is a quiet routine, one that simon completes with ferocious intensity. he’s never once skipped out on this, never once had been lazy with it, and it makes your heart warm.
he looks up after his final check, turning to you with one last wave, before he’s snapping his visor down and revving the engine. then they’re off.
later, simon will come back with a slumbering princess in his arms. you two make a quiet work on removing her helmet and her shoes, before simon takes her to sleep. then, he’ll slide in beside you, pull you in for cuddles, before recounting their little adventure to you.
-
IM SORRY THIS BECAME A RAMBLE AND ITS NOT EVEN ABOUT THE BIKE RIDE BUT ITS JUST :((( dad simon is so so precious
love you too vi and yes im gulping down rn as i type!!
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someone make the decision for me i cant do both. well i can but i need to choose which one goes w a specific thing so just tell me what's hotter in ur opinion pls :3
#poll#both r hot but like i have a thing abt waterboarding but i had a realization that drowning may be better for this but idk#they have slightly different vibes but both fit but also what would be hotter. theyre both hot but what is The Hottest#also while we're at it if u know other torture methods that r hot pls tell me i have created a list but im not dead-set on anything yet#except that there needs to be either waterboarding or drowning#okay i must go my next class is starting soon goodbye for now *disappears for forever (like 2 hours)*
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ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴇʀ ᴄᴀᴍᴘ - ᴍᴀᴛᴛ ꜱᴛᴜʀɴɪᴏʟᴏ
(part 3) (part 2) (part 1)
summary: you and your best-friend matt, have decided to sign up to be a summer camp counsellor for your school's summer project! will you two stay as just friends? or will this summer turn out different for you guys.
a/n: glad you guys are liking this series, this part is smutty af, but i like it, i might be wrong but i think this is a little shorter than part 1 and 2.
contains: SMUT! fluff, making out, swearing.
—------------╚══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╝------------——
he pulls away slowly as his phone lights up, he scrolls through it before letting out a soft laugh "no way" he scoffs, rubbing his eyes. "tonight were sleeping in the kids hall, like me and you, supervising.."
"you're kidding matt"
"nope, apparently theres a small cabin that connects off the kids hall, its got 1 bed that we share" he laughs
my cheeks flush, sharing a bed with matt, after this?..
-
after my makeout session with my bestfriend ,matt, we both went back to our own cabins, packing certain things to prepare for sleeping next to the kids sleeping-hall.
"xaiveerrr!" i yell, swinging the door to our cabin, hes sitting comfortably on his bed, still wearing his swimshorts as he scrolls through his phone. "y/n! i was waiting for you to come back to the lake?" he says, slightly confused.
"oh i just went into the kayak shed with matt." i smile, trying to wipe the blush off my face.
he raises an eyebrow "why'd you go in there? you totally abandoned me, i had to try make friends with fucking lincoln, hes weird as fuck.."
my mind scrambles, trying to think of a believable excuse for why i disappeared with matt into a dark shed for 25 minutes. i open my mouth, nothing comes out.
silence grows in me and xaivers shared cabin before he interrupts "no way, you kissed matt!?" he laughs, i slam my hand over his mouth "ew no what the hell!" i say defensivley.
"you're getting defenssiiivveee" he teases, my face goes cherry red. "we didn't do anything xaiver." i mutter, walking over and packing my toothbrush and pyjamas in a small tote bag.
"oh girl, i know you're not moving out right now, i was kidding!!!" he says, staring at me while i pack everything i need for a night.
"im not moving out, me and matt have to spend the night in the kids hall."
he gasps "oh my god, its luxury in there, i heard paige and dani were in there the other night, the cabin which you guys stay in is relativly close to the kids hall, so you're not actually in with the kids, its just a private room near it." xaiver says.
"oh thank god, though id have to sleep in a bunk in the middle of the kids hall." i sigh, throwing my tote bag over my shoulder, hugging xaiver goodbye.
"don't have too much fun with matt" he whispers, resulting in me slapping his arm "shut up."
-
I walk down the long gravel path towards matts cabin, its got a small sign outside which reads, 'MATT & LINCOLN' i walk up to their cabin, knocking twice. matt swings open the door, hes got a toothbrush in hand.
"where the fuck is your bag" i laugh.
"bag?" he questions
"yeah? overnight bag, like pyjamas, toothbruhs, face wash..."
his face stays deadpan "oh uh, this is all i need." he laughs pointing to the toothbrush.
"doesn't matter, lets go." i say unlocking my phone and reading the time 7:34pm
matt subtly holds my hand as we approach the kids hall, theres a small cabin about 20 meters away from it, "theres our room!" he says, walking me over to it and swinging open the door, theres one double bed with a book of rules on it. i place my bag down on the bed as matt flicks through the book
"all the campers must be in bed by 9pm, uhh, any complications call jessie in the main office.." he trails off "seems easy enough."
after a few minutes of unpacking matt grabs my hand again, my heartrate increases as he stares into my eyes, "c'mon, lets go check out the kids hall." he says before letting my hand go and walking out into the evening air.
we walk up the stairs to the kids hall, opening the double doors.
theres about 100 bunk beds, with around 200 hundred kids scattered across the room, wall diveders in some parts so its not just an open room, a group of kids are doing gymnastics, another couple are reading, its chaotic but controlled.
i look up at matt, he seems slightly overwhelmed.
instantly three six year old girls run up to us,
"are you guys boyfriend girlfriennddd!" one of them says, smiling up at me and matt. another group of slightly older girls come up to me, "can we braid your hair?"
i look at matt, hes smiling at me, a small blush painted on his cheeks, "yeah sure!" i say as one of the nine year olds pulls me towards her bunk bed, sitting me and matt down.
she giggles as she pulls out two hairbands, tying up matt's hair into pigtails above his head. matt rubs his eyes, as they start placing bows in his hair. "looking good matt" i say, nudging his arm.
-
i check my watch again, 8:55pm
shit.
i stand up from her bunk bed, my hair decked out in glitter hairspray.
i drag matt away from his makeover, "hey, we're just getting to the good part!" matt whines, "matt we have 5 minutes to have 200 kids asleep." i say, stressed, running my hand through my crispy hair.
"you guys have to be in bed in 5 minutes guys! whoever falls asleep first gets a candy!" i yell from the middle of the hall, instantly all the kids leap into bed, screaming as they gather their stuffed animals.
the whole room goes silent, apart from a few whispers, i look at matt whos got a suprised expression spread across his face. i grab his hand before walking towards the door, flicking off the light and stepping out into the night breeze.
we approach our small cabin for the night, matt opens the door, pulling me inside and locking the wooden door behind us.
"we should finish what we started earlier." he mumbles, looking down at me in the dimly lit cabin.
"what?" i whisper, but im cut off by his hand on the side of my cheek, he leans down, pulling me into a gentle kiss.
"we can't matt." i say pulling away.
"why not, you scared?" he teases.
"anyone can walk in or hear us, the walls are paper thin." i sigh.
"who said we have to do it in here?" matt says seductively
"im not fucking you in a public bathroom, thats gross." i sigh, walking over and grabbing my toothbrush.
"come with me." matt whispers, taking my hand and unlocking the door to the cabin. he grips onto my hand as he runs towards the trees, he picks me up, taking me into the garland until theres a patch of soft grass.
he waits for me to say something.
"i think i need you.." i mumble as he lays me on the grass on my back.
"tell me what you want me to do to you baby." he whispers, grabbing the inside of my thigh.
"fuck.. please fuck me." i whisper shakily.
i pull my tanktop off over my head, to his suprise i have no bra on underneath. my nipples instantly become hard as the breeze hits them. i pull down my pyjama shorts, leaving me revealed for him
"its gonna be okay baby, just tell me when." matt says, pulling his sweatpants down.
his length springs out, tapping his stomach lightly.
"oh my fuck-" i groan, throwing my head back as he kneels between my legs, lining himself up with my entrance "you gotta be nice and quiet for me, can you do that for me?" he says, holding my hand.
he slowly pushes inside of me, his length stretching me out, i wince. "breathe." matt says, "look at me sweetheart." he mumbles as he thrusts deeper inside of me, my eyes stay sealed shut. "watch me baby or i'll stop."
he pulls out to his tip, then thrusts back in "taking me so well."
i let out a loud moan, "shut up, and take it." he says slamming a hand over my mouth. his thrusts intenseify, my moans are muffled by his palm. "im gonna fuck-" i groan, "hold it for me." he says, continuing to fuck me. without warning i clench around him, letting myself go.
he abrubtly pulls out, stroking himself a few times as he whimpers, realeasing all over my stomach before collapsing down beside me.
"im so proud of you." he whispers shakily as he pulls up his sweatpants. he hands me my shorts as he stands up, pulling me onto my feet as my legs tremble. "you okay?" he looks down at me, concern spread across his face.
"mmfgh." i mumble out, still processing what just happened, matt chuckles before picking me up and running us back to the cabin.
(the next morning)
I wake up to the godawful sound of dani's voice, i open my eyes slowly looking at her as she looks down at the bed, her arms folded.
i tap matt, forcing him awake. he groans as he yawns, his eyes springing open. his face drops as he sees danielle.
"saw you two last night." she says, her arms folded.
my stomach drops.
"jessie wants you two in her office, such a shame that you have to go home so early, you were only here for such a small amount of time! guess someone didn't read the no romance between staff rule.." she tuts.
"god, i feel soo sorry for you guys, also gonna fail business class cause you couldn't even keep a job here." she says in a fake sympathetic tone.
tears well in my eyes, threatening to fall.
"oh well, go on get dressed and pack your bags, better to be prepared before you see jessie." she sighs before walking out of our cabin.
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taglist which i forgot earlier
@iammattsturniolo @iloveneilperry @tatumrileyslover @chrisstopherfilmed
@leprechaunbirthdaygirl
not too sure wtf just happened none of it workin
#sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo x reader#sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo fluff
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"Please, I need it." part 2
c.s - drvgdealer
contains: smut , p! in v! , unprotected (wrap it folks) , dom!chris , sub!reader , oral fem!receiving , creampie , fem!reader , angst! , weed , alcohol , partying
part 1
a/n: sorry this took so long babes! im gonna start to make this into a series and will def make more oneshots. please give me suggestions and also let me know if you wanna be in my taglist! i hope yall enjoy! sorry it took so long 🤍
★・・・・・・★★・・・・・・★★・・・
I watched Chris walk out my apartment, slamming the door behind him, disappearing into the night.
"Don't text me again." repeated in my head constantly. I sat there, completely naked, still trying to comprehend what the hell had just happened. I gathered all my clothes that were sprawled out onto the floor and went to my shower, which I desperately needed.
I laid in my bed for the rest of the night, aimlessly scrolling on my phone, though I was continually puzzled by the earlier events.
I opened my messages and hovered above Chris' contact. He said to not text him again, but should I really listen?
I clicked his contact and typed away at my keyboard.
╰┈➤ texting
y/n : chris wtf was that
I sent the message but it immediately turned green.
"HE BLOCKED ME?" i shot up in my bed and yelled out in udder disbelief.
I opened instagram and searched up his username.
"user not found" now I was getting upset.
The last thing I had was snapchat. I reluctantly clicked on the app and scrolled to his name. Next to it sat a tiny x.
*timeskip*
"He blocked me on everything." I echoed through the phone to my best friend, Kailee.
"Girl that's weird as fuck. He really is gonna fuck you and then dip before letting you finish AND block you on everything? I always had a bad vibe about him." Kailee said in an obnoxious tone.
"I just want to get drunk and go out. Do you think we could go to that new club?" I spoke enthusiastically as I glued on the last of my press on nails to my fingers.
Kailee looked up at the phone with a small smirk and bit her lip. I knew she had been wanting to go for a while but I always shut her down simply because I was tired. Now, I needed a distraction.
"Hell yeah! Get ready and I'll come over in like an hour, then we can uber there!" She said in her usual excited tone.
We said our goodbyes and hung up the phone before I jumped into the shower, quickly shaving and cleaning myself.
I ran to my closet to pick my outfit. I settled on my black, long sleeve, off the shoulder, skin tight shirt and a matching pleated, black mini skirt, that perfectly showed off just enough of my ass.
I set the outfit on my bed and went to my vanity to start on my makeup. I decided to do a more natural look with a smoked out black wing and a brown lip.
Before I knew it, Kailee waltzed into my apartment and barged into my bedroom in her own hot, slutty, outfit.
"I brought pre-game!" she spoke as she pulled out two small shot glasses of Svedka vodka and set them each on the bed, next to my chosen outfit.
i quickly changed into my chosen outfit and added a pair of black platform heels. before Kailee and I left for the club, we both took our own shots of the vodka Kailee brought, both of us making gross faces to the taste.
We got into our uber once it arrived and made our way to the Aether Lounge club.
Flashing neon lights of all colors surrounded me. It was so dark you could barely see any faces in the crowded room. All you heard was that one song, Needed me, by Rihanna. The smell of sweating bodies, weed, and alcohol filled my nose the deeper we went into the crowd. Girls danced the night away as guys desperately tried to dance with the drunken girls though getting shoved away.
Kailee and I made our way to the bar, both ordering vodka redbulls. I took maybe one sip of my drink before I was sucked into the sweaty crowd by my best friend. We both let the alcohol take over our bodies as we became more sloppy with our movements the more we drank.
The lights added a euphoric sensation while it seemed everything moved in slow motion. I was down at least 6 vodka redbulls along with 3 shots of Jameson.
As the night went on I spent most of my time dancing with Kailee just having fun. Suddenly, I felt firm and large hands grab my waist.
They were cold and the fact they had metal rings on made me shiver against their touch. I quickly turned around to see a familiar silhouette standing above me. I followed his body carefully up to his shoulders, then his neck, to his jawline, eventually to those cold and piercing blue eyes.
I felt my heart rate skyrocket as a sly grin showed on his face. Chris.
"Miss me, sweetheart?" he spoke so smoothly. I could smell every ounce of alcohol and weed on his breath as he muttered into my ear.
I escaped from his tight grasp and slipped out the crowd to a more private and secluded part of the club. Chris knowingly, followed me.
I turned to face him with a scowl. I gritted my teeth as I threw my arms up in defeat and confusion.
It had been weeks since the last time we saw each other last and his last words to me were to "never contact him again". So what the hell was he doing here?
"What the fuck are you doing Chris? You told me to never contact you again. Are you following me? What do you want?". I was already angry with him and the fact that I had been drinking was not much help to deescalate the situation.
"I missed you, ma. I saw you dancing and thought I should probably speak to you because of what happened. And no, by the way. I'm not following you. I wanted to apologize for what happened but you have to understand I did it for your own sake." his words came out slurred every now and then and though I was impaired... I could still tell he meant it.
I folded my arms and shook my head as I scoffed at him.
"For my own sake? I'm the only one that can determine what's good and what's bad for me, Chris. You have to right to try and tell me what's good or bad for me." I wanted to scream at him. "You didn't have to block me on everything."
He rolled his eyes and licked his teeth.
"Y/n, last time I told you to not text me again and I didn't block you, you still texted me. So again I did it for your own well being. And when it comes to us... I do have say in what's good or bad for you." he retaliated.
I looked at him with an offended expression.
"Us?" i questioned. "There is no us. You and I are not an item and never have been. What happened last time was a mistake and it never should've happened."
Chris looked almost offended and hurt at my words. Instead he responded in anger.
"Are you fucking kidding me y/n?! You don't understand what's going on. How can you be so goddamn ignorant and oblivious to everything that's happening around you?! I shouldn't even be speaking to you right now but I am because I love you!" his chest rose and fell as he breathed heavily.
I rose my eyebrows and turned my lip up. My mouth fell open as I stared at him. I felt the heat in my chest rise and I just wanted to rip my hair out.
"Y/n. There's bad people out there who want to get to me through you. I had to cut contact with you after the first time to protect you but obviously didn't work. Being a dealer is not a safe job and being with me is too dangerous for both of us."
I just shook my head and began to walk away from him. I grabbed my phone and pulled up Kailee's contact. I told her I was going home early because I was exhausted and didn't feel good.
I walked outside and the fresh, cool air felt amazing against my skin. I closed my eyes to take it in before I felt someone grab my hand. I opened my eyes to face the man I had just been arguing with.
"Chris this is ridiculous. You sound ridiculous." I was cut off by his lips crashing against mine. I once again, did not pull away. I let our lips dance together until the burning sensation to breathe was hurting me.
I swallowed harshly while I looked up at him with my doe eyes. He placed his finger under my chin as he admired my features with his eyes that seemed to have turned soft instead of the cold blue that stabbed daggers into you.
"I called us an uber. It'll be here soon." He spoke so softly that it seemed to soothe me. I hadn't realized how tense I was until just now.
Pretty soon a black car pulled up and I followed Chris to the car. He opened the back door for me and helped me in before following suit.
It was a short ride that I don't remember much of. Only just the fact that Chris kept staring at me though I tried my best to ignore it. I looked out the window but could still feel his eyes watching me and my every move.
We stopped in front of an apartment building. My apartment building. I followed Chris out the vehicle as I thanked the driver.
"Go home y/n." he spoke so softly yet so sternly.
I only stared up at him for a few seconds though it felt like minutes. I was contemplating in my head and weighing out my decisions as I looked deeply into his eyes.
I never saw Chris during the day. It was only at night. If his eyes were still so bright at night, I could only imagine how captivating they were during the day.
"Come inside."
He cocked his head at me and chuckled.
"Y/n... you're drunk." he retaliated.
"Come on. I never finished last time... let's see if you can do it this time." i winked and smirked at him as i spoke. He seemed surprised at my actions though he still agreed. He rolled his eyes and scoffed as he followed me into my apartment.
Before I was even able to set my bag down or take off my painful shoes I was thrown against the wall. Chris held my hips to pin me in that position as he attacked my own lips with his.
Chris pushed his tongue against my lips and I instinctively opened my mouth to give him full access to freely explore my mouth. I moaned softly into his mouth with the passionate kiss.
He removed me from the wall and instead led me to the kitchen where he bent me over the cold countertop, sending shivers across my body.
Chris lifted my short skirt to expose my bare ass. I could sense the sly smirk on his face when he noticed I was not wearing any underwear.
"Who did you plan to fuck tonight, baby?" i heard that stupid ass smile in his voice. i rolled my eyes and groaned.
He slapped my ass that left a burning sensation. "Who do you belong to y/n?" he said in a deep and possessive voice. i gulped before looking back at him. his eyes were dark and angry but still so bright and soft.
"you. i belong to you." he nodded his head and practically ripped off his own pants and underwear.
just as before he entered into me ruthlessly and kept his fast and hard pace.
considering it had weeks since i last had sex i was so not used to his size. i winced in pain but that same pain slowly began turning into pleasure.
Chris tucked his left hand under my jaw and tilted my head up while with his right hand he held tightly onto my hip as he fucked me relentlessly.
i could feel as i got closer to my climax and Chris could tell when my moans and whines got more sloppy. i tightened around him which elicited groans from the man.
with only a few more thrusts from Chris i felt him coat my walls while i coated him with my own liquids.
he flipped me over to face him and he lifted me onto the counter, forcing my legs opened. i held myself up with my right hand while my left went straight to Chris's hair as he knelt down in between my legs.
without warning he inserted his middle and ring finger into me causing loud moans to escape my mouth. he used his tongue to circle around my clit. i gripped tightly onto his brown locks and leaned my head back in pleasure. i removed my hand from underneath me and laid back fully on the counter.
chris wrapped his arms around my thighs to keep me still. my core tightened when he sucked onto my clit and used his tongue to lick my folds.
he removed his mouth from in between my thighs and smirked that stupid smirk. "All clean baby."
i stared up at the ceiling while my chest rose and fell at a fast pace. i heard chris slip back into his own clothes and i quickly sat up on my elbows.
"You're leaving again?" chris tilted his head and softly chuckled. i furrowed my eyebrows at him and felt a heat rise in my chest from anger.
"Are you fucking kidding me?!" he widened his eyes in surprise at my sudden outburst.
i jumped off the counter and stood in front of him.
"You cannot just tell me to never text you again and then you randomly come back, fuck me in my kitchen, and then leave!" i felt my eyes start to well up with tears as i glared at the taller in front of me.
he shook his head and gritted his teeth while looking off to the side. "I already told you this y/n. I'm leaving you to protect you."
"Then fucking leave! Do not just come back and make me get attached to you!!" the tears rolled down my cheeks as i continued my yelling. i choked on my own words.
"If you want to protect me then stop coming back!" i could see Chris getting angry too. his nostrils flared and grinded his jaw.
he looked down at me and noticed my red cheeks and tear swollen eyes. i could see guilt fill his eyes. he knew he had gone too far.
"Please listen to me y/n... I'm only leaving because I have to go meet with someone." he paused and took a deep breath before continuing.
"After this job, I'm done. I'll meet with some people and tell them I'm out... okay?" he cuffed my cheek in his hand as he wiped my tears with his thumb. "I promise."
I looked at the man standing over me. I couldn't say anything. i relaxed in his touch.
"Go take a bath, just relax, and I'll be back in about 2 hours." he spoke so softly I could hardly hear him. he placed a sweet and lustrous kiss on my lips before he left my apartment.
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taglist: @sturnthepot @sturniololo
#chris sturniolo#chris x reader#sturniolo triplets#fanfic#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#chris smut#drvgs
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Oh my god you keep doing my asks!! Even my anonymous ones (which you often think is yuna) so thank you!!! 💗🎀🩰
This time I want to request enhypen reaction to their fellow members/ friends getting too touchy with you
WAIT THAT WAS YOU? damn I feel bad about my baby @yunabi436 who should definitely read this as revenge for making me cry with 4278. Thank you for the ideas darling! Im sorry I'm a bit slow on answering them though!
Jealousy resides in Heeseung's veins. So when his eyes and his mind processed the fact that Jake had his arm around your shoulder, and you were laughing to his joke, all he saw was red. So he'd act cute at first, hooking into your arm and giving you the Bambi eyes and saying he wants to go home, which makes you bid goodbye to poor, confused, Jake who is wondering why Heeseung shot a glare at him. But at home-
"So you want Jake for a boyfriend now do you? Got bored of one dick, now you want two darling?" You'd have no warning, before your back is against the wall, and his dick is rubbing against your pussy, making you whimper pathetically at the friction. Heeseung, when jealous, doesn't waste time in stretching you out. Instead all he does, is rip open your panties, take a moment to stare at your pussy, and then ram his length into you, making you moan, out of both pain and pleasure.
"Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?" He'd growl in your ear, while moving his hips against you at an extremely rough pace. His dick rubbed against your g-spot so well, and the overstimulation from him not allowing you to cum was killing you, but Heeseung wouldn't budge.
Jay knows that you are a person of your own and you can do whatever you like. But a certain amount of jealousy did arise in him, when he saw that Sunghoon and you were sitting perhaps a little too close to each other and sharing a tiramisu too! The jealousy wasn't enough for him to drag you out by the arm or anything, but it was enough for him to ask for a bite of the tiramisu. Right in front of Sunghoon. You, oblivious to his motive, fed it to him, laughing at how Sunghoon comedicaly pouted. You could sense Jay turning red next to you, so you decide to tease him a bit. And then back at home-
"Uh uh no cumming until I say so." Jay had been inside your pussy with a vibrator for a long time, pounding it by pressing his hand deeper and deeper. His trousers and shirt remained stuck tightly to him, making you crave his dick more. "Jay-please ah-ahh." You'd scream making him smirk at you, and increase the speed of the vibrator a bit more. The cold material was making your pussy clench around it, wishing fervently that it was his dick instead.
"You should have thought about begging for my cock before cuddling with Sunghoon." He'd growl in your ear, stopping the vibrator just as you were about to cum, you whimpered feeling the tight knot in your stomach disappear, in turn making Jay smirk against your skin.
Collars were never much Jake's buisness. He actually hated them. He would never hurt his baby just for his own pleasure, if and unless she asked him too. But when Heeseung jokingly kissed you on the cheek for a dare and you giggled, your cheeks turning red, all Jake saw was you in a collar with the chain twisted inbetween his hands.
"Who do you want to fuck now darling?" Jake pulled on the chain of the collar, his cock moving in and out of your pussy. You were suffocated yet high on his touch on your throat. "You- only you ahh fuck Jake!" You screamed, as Jake abused your sweet spot with his tip. "Oh no I thought it was Heeseung." He growled, pulling out his length before ramming it in again, pain flowing through you like a soothing tonic.
Jake tugged slightly on the chain again, and watched in pleasure as you writhed under him, how your thighs were smeared with sweet cum, and how your pussy was taking his dick so well even now. He'd remind you again, on how you belonged to him, and only him.
Park Sunghoon. Aka probably the only one out of the entire hyung line who'd not even let himself near you for a whole year if you even shake hands with one of the members. And Jay accidentally brushing his hand across yours when he's reaching across to get some fruit is basically the end game for Sunghoon. Sunghoon will probably give Jay a piece of his mind in secret to which Jay would ask you whether or not Sunghoon is an absolute simp in secret. And Sunghoon would be almost restraining himself from fucking you on the dinner table.
However he does very sneakily slide his hand up your thigh and massage it a bit too close to your pussy, making you squirm in silence. He would even go as far as fucking you in silence when you guys were watching a movie on the couch with the guys and their girlfriends. He would definitely ask for a blanket from Jay, feigning chilliness and sneak his fingers up towards your panties. The feeling of him cupping your clothed pussy has you whimpering, so you violently stuff some popcorn in your mouth to shush yourself, earning yourself a side eye from Jay and Sunghoon's fingers running through your folds at a maniacal pace.
"You can moan darling." Sunghoon would whisper in your ear, his middle finger repeatedly touching your g spot, "Make them know that you're mine yeah?"
#Enha#enhypen#enha x reader#enha smut#enha hard thoughts#enha hard hours#enhypen hard hours#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypen smut imagines#enhypen smut#enhypen smut reactions#enha smut imagines#enha smut reactions#heeseung smut#jay smut#jake smut#sunghoon smut#lee heeseung smut#park jay smut#park Jongsoeng smut#sim jake smut#sim jayeun smut#park sunghoon smut#enhypen × reader
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