#im going to confront him about everything
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toxic myung-gi head cannons?š luv me some toxicness
Myung-gi toxic head cannon
warnings: extreme toxic behavior, obsessive behavior, mean myung gi, edging, overstimulation.
(sorry if itās badšš)
ā¢ Myung-gi is the type to most likely go thru your phone when you leave it behind and check everything, photos, recently deleted, and socials
ā¢ once he automatically finds something he doesnāt like he goes beyond, he confronts you and makes you explain and if he doesnāt like your explanation he gets a bit aggressive
ā¢ Once you pull out āWhy are you even going thru my phone without my consent?!ā card, heāll make everything seem like he didnāt do nothing wrong, he accuses you of cheating or hiding something from him
ā¢ He would probably bend you over and shove his full length into you as a āpunishmentā but probably just wants to fuck you.
ā¢ Heāll overstimulate as a punishment as well, trying to get every last orgasm out of you at least 5, his thrust are really sloppy since itās mixed with your juices and cum and his cum.
ā¢ If yall are in public and notices your catching up with an āold male friendā he automatically gets so possessive and jealous, he literally stares into the poor guys soul not caring about anything. He even tries to include himself in the conversation. the second he notices him or you being too friendly, heās quick to drag you away.
ā¢ he takes you somewhere private and yells at you, maybe a slight degrading, āYou little slut! you just wanted to catch my attention huh? you just wanted to make me jealous!ā, and with that your pressed against a wall getting fucked, plunging his cock deep inside you while whispering dirty things into your ear āIs this what you wanted huh? to get me all worked up hm? cāmon. you can tell me the truth.ā he says as he keeps thrusting in and out with one hand slightly gripping onto your hips and the other on the wall
ā¢ He likes to take control of the relationship and make everything go his way, he wants to make all the decision like what you wear and what you do, and if you donāt listen he starts crashing out, he makes you feel bad and sometimes, RARELY blackmails you and eventually you give in and follow what he wants
ā¢ Once he saw you wearing a revealing outfit, he got so pissed and letās just say you were not able to cum for at least that afternoon, he spends the whole night or day teasing you and fingering you but not once letting you cum at all, which makes you whine and cry out as he gives you a slight slap on the face. āBe grateful iām even giving you anything. Stop whining or else iām not gonna let you cum.ā he says while pushing your hips down back onto the mattress as he was eating you out.
ā¢ But overall he is a good boyfriend just very toxic when he gets jealous and possessive, He does love you a lot and admires you, one of his excuses of being so controlling is, āIām just worried about you! i really do love you, im looking after you! what donāt you understand about that!ā
#squid game#squid game smut#myung gi#lee myung gi#squid game season 2#squid game s2#squid game x reader
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dreading this driving lesson please wish me luck
#im going to confront him about everything#and hope it fixes#bc otherwise im gonna be looking for another instructor#iām so scared tho#idk how to do it#mine
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Do you have any plan to make some kind of bonus chapter or oneshot about marcille's perspective in little creature? It's not like I'm asking you for it ofc!! it's just that i think it'll be interesting to read, and especially since you had those tags about marcille after her fight/outburst with falin and how you couldn't add it to the fic because the fic is from falin's perspective
Probably not about anything that happens during a little creature, but maybe something before or after? Sometimes I do like to do "the other character thinking back to events while doing stuff in a sequel" oneshot type thing, but we'll see how it shakes out!
#asks#a little creature#i will say#Marcille was firmly in denial and just Not Thinking About Her Feelings#the dinner scene was the first crack in her self delusion but it was still there#then the last chapter was it finally shattering as she saw Falin kissing someone else and experienced Elf Shrimp Emotions#just insane intensity furor and jealousy#she was about to fucking blow up#and then the confrontation happens and shes literally in shambles#cant think everything hurts#just barely scraping enough braincells to thank kiki inbetween enormous hiccups and sobs that shake her entire body#sees laios. slaps him. collapses into his arms sobbing and apologizing again#he cant actually understand what shes saying through the blubbering but hes doing his best to comfort her#to be perfectly honest im not 100% she even has the space to process 'i have feelings for falin' in full clarity#the 'why did seeing her kissing someone else make me feel like i wanted to die or kill someone' doesnt like... click#not until she gets over the mess of 'how could she say that to me didnt i do enough'#'didnt i love her enough does she care so little for me that she cant even bother to think about how i feel'#'does she care so little for me that she doesnt know that i would die for her i HAVE died for her and killed for her'#'how could she not know that she was nothing less than my whole reason for living for so long'#... i guess thats what shes blubbering at laios but it just comes out as like#'howcouldnbwhebwsbebwbendoesbdhemotbbwkowbblblbllvlbl'#snotting into laios's shirt#its ok. she'll be ok. like laios has to carry her back to her room because she latched on and didn't let go until she literally like#cried herself to exhaustion and passed out.#but she'll be okay. after maybe another day of moping she finally has her White Woman Moment of looking at herself in the mirror#and admitting that she's in love with falin and has been for a while
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Vecnaās plan requiring Mike to leave for California means nothing. The number 1 following Mike cryptically at the airport means nothing. Them barely giving us Mikeās perspective the last two seasons (despite him being the original protagonist) means nothing and it isnāt setting up his POV to be revealed in s5 bc the entire audience is completely comfortable with where Mike stands as a character in regards to his deeper feelings/motives. No confusion there so no need to address that. Mike saying How will I survive a whole week without you guys at the start of s4 wasn't foreshadowing his fate at the end of said week. Mike standing in front of exit signs 3+ times in s4 is probably just a coincidence. Mike being associated with gaping mouths in multiple moments spanning the entire series, even going back to his very first line on the show, means nothing at all. Nancyās vision about her family (Mike) dying was mentioned at the end of s4, but it didnāt happen so probably wonāt ever happen, even though thereās still another season left set directly after the events of s4. Will calling Mike the heart and how without heart theyād all fall apart, was not in any shape form foreshadowing something happening to Mike and them all falling apart, bc Mike is definitely just a prop and everything in relation to his story only holds meaning on the surface or for other characters arcs and couldnāt possibly be hinting at something deeper thatās being saved as one of the many surprises for the last season.
#byler#stranger things#im sorry but ppl getting mad over speculation about mike and vecna is weirdā¦ especially when there's series long evidenceā¦#like we know for a fact Will and vecna are facing off in s5 it's a given with the most basic ga being ready for it#itās probably going to really come to a head in that final battle in the last two episodes#so early s5 and everything leading up to Will being confronted by vecna cant just be Will and vecna confronting each other over and overā¦#that would make their final confrontation anticlimactic#thereās a reason we keep seeing a chess board/dnd in relation to the events to come#bc EVERYONE is a piece in vecnaās game#EVERYONE plays a role in him reaching his main goal#back in 2019 if ppl heard max was a target or Nancy was a target in s4 they wouldāve been confused#bc thereās little to no ties between the mindflayer and those characters#for a fact Will has more ties to vecna than them#HOWEVER them having no connection to vecna is not entirely true#vecna is connected to Max and Nancyās trauma related to the person they lost because of him..#and he used that against them to be 10 steps ahead so that he can lead up to reaching his final goal AKA WILL#he could have just got will 10 times already but he doesn't do it that way#we couldāve not had any of the events in s3-4 happen with random ass characters#BUT THE REALITY IS VECNA WANTS/NEEDS CANNON FODDER#he needs ppl that are just players in his game to overcome to eventually follow through with his plan#Mike arguably has fucked over vecna more than anyone#heās also someone that both Will and El care for dearly#thereās a reason vecna's plan required the great big love triangle mishap in s4#his plan literally depended on that miscommunication so that they would have a false win#like yāall just seem to want the most anticlimactic season with Will and vecna facing off onlyā¦#yes that Will happen and it will be some of the biggest moments of the season#but there's other stuff that's gotta happen...#and tbh will is going to be swamped with venca/lab revelations next season#them pounding us on the head with will is gay in s5 is going to feel repetitive as we've seen that four seasons in a row...#mike on the other hand...
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Listen, although I do find it pretty exciting to see Kendall entering his Evil Era and actually becoming a killer, I canāt stop thinking about the consequences of him leaking all the shitty mud information they have on Logan. Like yeah, PR-wise that might be a great idea, it might actually solidify his position as a CEO (and he is obviously going to try and fuck up Matsson deal and take over the Waystar - I donāt know why he would want to captain the fucking sinking Titanic, but okay). But on the other hand, all the dirt coming out about Logan will be potentially catastrophic for Roman. Apart from the fact that Kendall is very clearly betraying his brother, literally like 5 seconds after he preached about them being a team; Roman will very likely suffer the most if stuff about Logan being an abusive father comes out.
First, it will flip his whole viewpoint upside down - he is so deep in denial and so trauma-bonded to Logan that he doesnāt even acknowledge his abuse, not even when in happens in real time. He doesnāt want to see his father as a monster and as his abuser, because that would actually require him to accept that he was a victim, that he was this beaten dog that everyone already sees him as (to one degree or another). Not to mention all the lies he tells himself about Logan and him being a good dad will go straight down the drain, and can you imagine what happens when something you believed for 40-or-so years cracks down in front of you? Kendall is about to break his reality.
Another aspect is that exposing Romanās abuse to the whole world will likely destroy any and all opportunities that Roman ever had when it comes to rising to power (even if Iām unsure how much he actually cares about becoming a CEO). He might get some sympathy points, although I very much doubt that he will ever accept that form of pity from anyone. His image will be forever tainted and solidified as āthe abused oneā or the āone that was hit by his dadā. Can you imagine Romanās reaction when that whole shitshow leaks? He does say at some point in the preview that he is finished, and although it might allude to Gerri putting out the whole dick pic situation, it might also very well be that his public image will forever now revolve around how his dad hit and abused him (his dad who was essentially his god in more than one way, who he was, and is trauma bonded to, who he came back to time and time again).
Kendall has a tendency of using his siblings trauma to forward his own position (even when he wanted to one up Logan in episode 2 by bringing up Romanās and Connorās trauma) and this is no different. But itās a very easy way for him to blow up whatever alliance was ever between sibs. So yeah, I think Kendall as a killer is a great thing to watch, but alsoā¦ well, Roman girl in me is already screaming in the void from the possible pain we might come to watch unravel in real time.
#succession#roman roy#like my boy might be delusional about pre-greving or whatever#but the fact is that he is for some real mental breakdown#if all the emotions and everything comes down on him like a ton of bricks#and lets not forget that Roman is innately incapable of actually dealing with his own emotions#everything he feels or might potentially feel gets locked up in a cage (hah) and the key gets immediately thrown out#he retreats into himself just to not feel stuff that might break him#not to mention that I was very carefully watching him for past 2 episodes#and just going by his breathing patterns (yes I know insanity of a fan)#but Roman seems to be constantly on the verge of a panic attack#so imagine what will happen when he will be aggressively confronted with all the shit he doesnāt want to face or acknowledge#im torn between obv not wanting it for him#but I also strive on my favourite characters being in pain#and i have not seen roman breakdown yet#and im actually a bit hungry for it#so yeah#kendall is a killer and his brother might very well be his new victim#(hopefully not in a literal sense I donāt fucking want any deaths im also not emotionally equipped for that)#succession hbo#kendall roy#kieran culkin#succession 4x04#succession season 4#marta rumbles poetically#succession spoilers
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#this isn't the yandere fantasy i was looking for#i at least wanted him to be hot#or interesting#not some ugly loser ass misogynistic homophobe with no money#basically theres this weird dude that I see all the time at the dispensary I frequent#and I was just warned by the owners that for the past couple of weeks that he keeps asking them about me whenever im not there#and bringing me up to other customers (who I haven't met)#and telling them about me and talking about me when I'm not there#and I'm apparently the only person he does that about/to#and he keeps lying to me about things like living on his own#and having a job#and having siblings??#like just lying about anything and everything for no reason#unfortunately he does know where I live because he had to pick something up from me at some point#so I'm going to have to try and resolve it very carefully#hoping to confront him today#vent post#personal#honestly its not that deep I find it more funny then anything else#but it just seems ironic considering I just made this blog a few days ago and just wrote my first yandere fanfic#makes me feel like i manifested it#the monkeys paw sure did fuck me over on this one
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god yeah scar was trying to kill people very hard but he really was fixated on trying to kill grian with those tnt minecarts he just kept dropping over and over. like with everyone else he just tried the minecart or mining the block underneath them and if it didnt work he just left them alone and went after someone else but he was like DETERMINED to kill grian with the tnt minecart. erm.
#that one shitpost i made w scar with theĀ ''theres a lot of rage boiling under my skin ready to burst out of my chest but im a chill guy''#post is so real.......... hes acting all silly and goofy as always but then with the lowkey passive aggressive reference to grian's#treatment of him in double life and then this...#i think he definitely was affected a lot more by everything than he appears on the surface..........#which i mean. thats how he always is. just think of the cheating stuff in double life even when confronting grian about it he acted all#passive aggressive and didnt ever actually like get Angry at him yknow#god how i want him to just hit a breaking point and go totally apeshit#serena.txt#limited life#goodtimeswithscar#grian#desertduo
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SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 7!!!!
Malleus Overblot sketches
#chapter 7#twst chapter 7#twst chapter 7 spoilers#chapter 7 spoilers#i have a lot of feelings about ch 7#its a lot ok like silver finnally crying about his dad made me physically weep in a hotel room like you cant do this to me#malleus overblot#silver is one of my favorite charicters and so far i am absolutely loving how much conetnt were gettinng of him#HOWVEVER I CANNOT GO ANYWHERE WITHOUTADDRESSING HOW GOD AFWFUL THE OB MODEL LOOKS#omg malleus my boy what have they done to you . also is it just me or is this chapter extremly short . like ch6 was like 6 hours worth#it feels a bit soon for everything idk maybe its me but it was so fast.#anyways i still think that bits and peices o my original ch 7 theroy still holds water . like sebek while horribly briefly was confronted#with a decision between loyalty to malleus and the right thing to do SEBEK of all people was terrified of malleus.#and then everyone fell asleep ( except idia) witch makes my og theroy hold water that he will invent somthing to wake some people up and or#stave off the affects of it or smthn idk im excied and scared
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i cant get over how absolutely insane satosugu is...gege was born to write yaoi forced to write shounen
#sorry i remembered hidden inventory arc n im insane about them again :(( SAD LITTLE GAY PEOPLE IN MY PHONE!!!#nah but it just...OUGHHH they make me so upset!!!#its just they way they start out immediately understanding each other bc gojo has been alone on a pedestal basically his entire life+#but then he meets geto who treats him like a normal dude!!! not a weapon!!! and just watching them annoy each other as normal teens +#makes me emotional bc theres so much cruelty and just DEATH in their world but at the least they have each other to get through it!!!#theyre the strongest together after all right!!! then toji happens and gojo starts to perfect his abilities with him automating infinity#and then the gap between the two just gets wider and wider...until the final confrontation where the one who understood gojo all this time#not only leaves him but calls him arrogant at the same time showing gojo the ONLY person who he though understood just..doesnt+#and hes left alone again in the same place he was years ago...AND OUGHHHHH#idk i watched a video analysis of hidden inventory where the guy said geto was just as egotistical as gojo except in having a savior comple#and tbh i never though of that before!! but looking back it makes sense with how he spoke to riko + the way he slaughtered the whole villag#to not just save the girls but also prove to himself that he could make the world he wanted#the guy in the video put it basically that since the gap between gojo and geto was so wide geto would rather be the best villain+#than second best hero and that makes a lot of sense since his ideals/goals as a villain go against his usual rational behavior#he KNOWS its probably impossible (for him at least it wouldnt be for gojo which he admits) but he has to do it for himself#sorry im rambling but AHHHHHH how tf did gege write this??? its such a small part of the story but its arguably the catalyst for everything#aside from plot wise it simply just is impactful emotionally! gege had to go thru a toxic codependent homoerotic friendship to write this+#theres just no other way#jjk#jujustu kaisen#gojo satoru#geto suguru#satosugu
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I never tried the option myself bc it'd probably mean skipping the Reason You Suck speech at the end (fire for speedrunners though) but I Love that you can frame your Phoneys in 3, especially so if you've already killed the previous two. Like yeah couldn't send you off to die so i'll let the goverment do it for me š§ø like its just Peak evil imo.
#luly talks#i do relinquish in the pain and the agony but dont get me wrong the thought of any of them 3 getting jailed makes me SO sad#rog esp since he's the one im writing about and the biggest nerve wreck#gingi voice they'll be the last one to pick the board game for prison-game-night..........#actually yknow i wonder if rog would end up almost believing it after all when you try to gaslight him for the shits and giggles#(as in: telling HE was victim of the bite of 87 and the like) he tells you to not do that bc his brain is already scrambled or something#so there's a chance perhaps he'd believe it if he had everyone constantly accussing him of it?#not like it'd matter much i have no hopes for the dsaf justice system i know its been 35 years since jack got framed but still#i just remembered when the option popped up i said ''god im really becoming steven š''#first time i made the joke too was when i said ''imagine your boss sucks so bad you turn suicidal'' no clue what the context was#OH YEAH JAKE SAYING HE'D RATHER FUCKING DIE THAN KEEP WORKING HERE yeah. poor guy.#anyway im derailing my own post again uhhh. yeah. yeah i dont trust any phoney is avoiding the death sentence#dsaf#roger jones#dsaf roger#btw just for the sake of yapping longer i truly cant decide whether harry or jake would survive better in the enviroment#probably jake to be honest. I mean Harry has a lot of experience inside freddy's but he didnt really live outside it muhc#jake is so confrontational though#hey did you guys watch the hit movie felon? sure that guy wasn't framed but. i feel like jake would end up w that attitude#except for. you know. everything else that happens in the hit movie felon.#hey actually forget about this game go watch the 10/10 movie Felon from 2008 starring Val Kilmer and Stephen Dorff#because its one of my all time fave movies and probably the saddest i've seen#not bc there arent movies that are more tragic but bc no movie was able to break thru my walls of idgaf and make me cry anyway#yeah you thought i couldnt bring up my movie fixations on my different fandom posts well you were WRONG in fact#im gonna go tag my other post i left untagged yesterday bc my ass was Cooking
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kinda tired of all these parent redemption arcs tbh. give chimney a gun
#911 spoilers#hey dont mind me im just casually popping in šš¼#but yeah anyway#eddie and ramon last season felt natural/organic but buck and chim in this one felt kinda forced#like im sorry but didnt the buckleys stop going to therapy with him?#youre gonna tell me that 30 years of emotional neglect has been resolved?? like. no lol#the ending was sweet but also. idk. contrived? that might not be the right word#and CHIMNEY#i have NEVER seen mr. han smile. not once. he was cold/distant with albert too but now all of a sudden theres a baby named after his dead#dead first wife and hes sitting on the floor playing?? making faces?? pop pop is funny???#it just doesnt seem realistic to me. like at all#plus everyone else putting the pressure on chim to reach out and fix things is bullshit#hen was so against him meeting with tatiana again. i feel like she was way too nice about it last ep#yeah its fine to encourage a talk for chim to get everything off his chest but like if it was me? if this was my friend?#idk maybe im a bad person but i wouldve used harsher language than that lol#'maybe its about what you need to say' turns into 'call him out! confront him! let him see what hes done to you! make him take responsibili#*responsibility!'#also didnt like that he wound up having the talk with his stepmom instead of the party actually involved#and maybe im remembering wrong but didnt his first marriage end bc his wife died?? he considers that a personal failure?#ANYWAY#all this to say: it is not the children's responsibility to reach out and reconcile with their parents. stop trying to make chim feel bad f#for being kinda aloof with the guy who literally abandoned him in a foreign country#god my thumbs hurt. im not used to this#chimney my beloved š#i think thats the tag. its been a while
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god the idea of a version of spn where uriel survives until the end is fascinating to me actually. i feel like part of the problem with castiel's character is that he's so disconnected, you'll get an angel a season there to work as castiel's parallel and then they're killed off and never brought up again. but uriel? the first one we see him with? who is so diametrically opposed to castiel in s4?
if he makes it to s5, does he team up with lucifer? he'd be the only angel that we know of who does. Abandon All Hope, but it's not castiel meeting a stranger, but Castiel also meeting with someone he considered a friend, who he would still consider a brother, and still having to tell him no. and Uriel throws his lot in with Lucifer, and that means he has to spend more time with demons? is there any part of him that looks at them and realizes that everyone on both sides is serving a god that doesn't want to look at them.
s6!! Lucifer lost!!! and that makes Uriel a traitor to Heaven so he can't go to Raphael, no matter how their goals may almost align (in the opening of the Cage, less so in who they're opening it for) and he can't go to Castiel! too much bad blood! too much betrayal! Where do you go during a civil war when both sides would prefer you dead?
Look, I don't know where this is going, but what I'm saying is, wouldn't it have been interesting to see Castiel and Uriel evolve as characters alongside each other. We know Castiel before Heaven gets blown to bits and falls, and that's why seeing the effects on him hurt so bad, the way he just loses more and more of what he tried to once save, uncovers more and more of how Heaven has been hurting angels. Just one other angel to react to that in a similar way but with a completely different viewpoint would have made it even more effective, and Uriel is perfect for that.
(I mean, in my mind, this ends as I always wish the whole heaven and angels arc in spn had, where those left over finally come together, look at the ruins that have been brought about, and take what they have been forced to learn to work together and build something better. rather than. you know. handing the reins to a three year old.)
#spn#supernatural#uriel spn#castiel spn#im not going to pretend uriel isnt an asshole. he is. have you considered this could be a good trait#spn but castiel has one 'friend' who looks at how he's being treated and goes. fuck this actually.#(they are not really friends. not anymore. but they are also two of the last angels. so who else do they have)#if we have to sit through multiple seasons of sam & dean going... yeah but. things that aren't human aren't worth protecting.#then it seems fitting to have a constant character to go 'actually everything that isn't human is fine. you all fucking suck.'#neither of them are right! big plot twist! spn but actually everyone deserves to live lmao#but actually have them fucking confront these things with each other.#with castiel at the center. just trying to mediate this. mostly failing.#NO WAIT IM THINKING ABOUT HUMAN!CAS ARC#BUT INSTEAD OF THAT RANDOM ANGEL GETTING CALLED BY CAS' SUICIDAL THOUGHTS#ITS URIEL. URIEL 'i'll kill her gentle' about anna being human SPN. LIKE. FUCK! THAT'S COMPELLING!#sorry im rambling about him he is so fun. he's a cunt. more characters should be and then not be punished by the writers.
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Love how your unga bunga tag is dedicated to jason todd. I get it
Alskdjsk this is not the first time I've been called out like this OTL
LISTEN. ITS NOT MY FAULT PEOPLE KEEP DRAWING HIM SO PRETTY OKAY TuT he's so babygirl and he makes me feral
#OTL#once again i am forced to confront my crimes. sorry jason i will continue to objectify you OTL OTL OTL#because heres the thing. when i first got into jaytim almost one whole year ago#i latched on HARD to tim drake as a pov character. i went 'ah. i get this goblin. i shake hands with this goblin.'#'i want this twink obliterated'#and i also went 'whatever i want tim shall have'#and while i had known OF jason todd before id never been particularly interested to learn more. like yeah ok the Edgy robin whatever#but learning? that tim? and jason? had some History? and readinf jaytim fics? oh boy. i understood. i got it#theres an insane possessive and obsessive edge to jaytim that fascinates me and now im in deep on the tim drake and jason todd rabbit hole#so yeah. i love tim dont get me wrong but i want jason carnally so he ends up being tagged unga bunga the most skcncnjdkd#and since its not possible for me to top him the tim's just gonna have to step up to the plate *slaps his ass* go get 'im tiger#slxckdksk sorry to dump about jaytim in this jason todd post but context is everything#jason todd#unga bunga#asked and answered#anonymous
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ever since the pandemic ended and i started going out and talking to people with the goal of "making friends being happy loving life" ive started o realize that i in fact do not enjoy the stay at home doing nothing not talking to anyone lifestyle and that i love calling ppl and that nature is actually the bomb, all the times id rather stay in bc "im just not an outings guy" is actually bc im like. traumatized or something
#do i know what caused this no do i want to stop it god. yeah. i wanna go out and vlimb trees :( i wanna hug my friends#and give them little gifts and non stop tell them about everything that im interested in :(#finding out im aromantic also just completely changed how i see my friendships and myself too#like yeah!!!!! friends!!!!!!!!#romantic tension is a lie i am just quirky & chill like that#anyways i AM looking forward to the thing were havong on monday HOWEVER the fact that its happening on my exs house is#unfortunate. like maybe im not gonna be so chill while there. but thats ok im still gonna try and im gonna be mature about it#is it weird hes already after someone else wohin less of a month yeah but its none of my business anymore#i dont want to confront him thats his own mess im being normal about it. i am handling this correctly#if anyone asks me i will be honest if he asks me i will be honest#i have no problem with the girl i only have a problem with him. i actually really really enjoy the girls company#shes so chill. like she says she loves me sometimes and im like woah! i dont rlly know you!#but its a warm feeling i enjoy it#i wanna start saying i love my friends too#i wanna make her a bracelet actually#thatd be so slay#o should invite her and some friends over just to make bracelets#we could make each other little things !!!!#i wanna draw stuff to my friends#yayayayayayayay i love my friends i wanna talk to them so bad omg omg omg what do i talk about#im gonna ask them about their day !!!!!#sg.txt
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Depression/PTSD recovery is wild because you could be doing greater than you've ever been in your life but then one small thing happens that reminds you of "that time" and suddenly all of the past emotions flood back into you and you feel like you're back to being the kid who's crying and shaking in the corner wondering if the people closest to you would be so much happier without you
#im being accused of faking my disabilities again and having them used against me#my mom hasnt talked to me for 2 days because of a shower chair being in the wrong spot#and said i use my adhd as an excuse to be stupid#and then i conftonted my partner about how he broke his promise to call me 3 days in a row#and he was drunk and saying things about how i cant understand how exhausted he is working 12 hr days (valid)#but then started calling me privileged for ''being able to sit at home all day and do nothing''#(he knows that im only stuck in bed on my bad days and that i definitely do not do ''nothing'')#so i asked him to call me back the next day(sunday) when he was sober. he never called me so i had to call him. he was drunk#so i got mad that he couldn't even stay sober for a COUPLE OF HOURS to talk to me#when hes sober hes super understanding and will take my feelings into consideration immediately#but he kept taking me confronting him as an insult and started calling me names like lazy and a crybaby#and this is the person who has always treated me perfect otherwise and does everything he can to make me feel better#and his personality COMPLETELY SWITCHED and he sounded exactly like my abusive exes#i sent him recordings of the call and he sent me 2 messages saying hes sorrh and hes gonna work on his drinking and was gonna call yesterday#then i didnt hear from him again and while he was ignoring my calls he made a post on fb (that he never uses) that he wasn't going to be#talking to anyone for a while because im the only person who cares about him#and i commented and was like hello??? im that one person and you're actively ignoring me?? and he deleted the post????#he didnt even send a message saying he wouldnt be able to call me#he never answered but when i called him today while he was at work he just responded ''cant talk im at work'' and i was like yeah ik but#im trying to get your attention because you wont tell me whats going on#and begged him to call me after work#hes acting like a completely different person now and i have a strong feeling that it's because at the place he works at in texas#they're made to work all day in a 110Ā° warehouse#and with his insomnia and having to be at work between 3-5am he's barely sleeping while doing all of this#so im hoping his behavior is just a symptom of heat exhaustion and lack of sleep#because this isnt like him at all#im begging and begging for his attention and affection the same way i did with my abusive exes and my mom#i dont know what's going on
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foundations of decay - chapter 5!!
very, very in character of me to vanish off the face of earth for so long just to come back and drop a chapter but oh well. i got some writing done (yay!!) in the past few days, filled in some gaps, and got way too excited to wait and post so--this.
hope u like it!
#harry potter#there's some introspective stuff happening here#a lil confrontation w petunia#more oscar!!!#serious discussions about sirius!!!#and!!!! most importantly!!! my baby siri will be here next chapter for sureeeee#i will get him there by hook or crook#even if i have to upload half my prewritten content lol#but i think im doing good on that front ngl#need to bridge a lot of stuff for the next one tho#the dementor attack and everything#but im gonna stop here before i give away my entire plot oof#go read it and tell me what u thinK!!!#hope u like it <3#also cannot believe im at 20k words#i know its not a lot#esp for a multichapter#but its still very !!!! for me#bc its consistency and thats not what im good at#so this is a big deal#and im v excited#numbers get me very hyped yall#i cant even explain it#fic: foundations of decay
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