#im glad we like different things
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I think one of the best things I've learned since getting into fiber arts is that something can be absolutely not my taste and I can still be impressed and delighted for the person who made it and people who love it. Almost every time I look through patterns or projects, I have a thought like, "I hate that and it's magnificent" or, "I wouldn't wear that, but HOLY CRAP it's amazing that you made it."
We need more of that.
#im glad we like different things#that makes the world more beautiful#fiber art#fiber crafts#crafting#taste
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multishipping is a superpower you neeeeeeeeeeed to have when you love getting into shitty gay media with found family because OF course they're going to make an incest map of all the characters and your otp will almost definitely not be endgame. of course they're going to pair the main guy and girl together as endgame just because. and I mean you COULD be a hater about it and curse the writers and throw a four year long fit but it's so much more fun when you just make your peace with the fact that this was always going to happen and pretend everyone is in a happy little polycule as they go through 18575879 different pairings you know aren't going to last because fandom and just the experience of being a fan is so much more fun that way!!!
#like one thing about me is i almost NEVER get the ship i want in any show ever#but WE PERSIST WE ADAPT#every ship has their moments! romance is dumb anyway but it's nice to see different characters connecting#some of yall were clearly not raised on glee smh#like as long as the characters experience new things and grow you know. a show is more than one ship#hsmtmts#glee#jane the virgin#never have i ever#love victor#community#xo kitty#there are sooooooo many of these I've lost count lol#heartbreak high#we are lady parts#walp#htgawm#pretty little liars#descendants#doafp#don't worry on the flip side i also support being a hater. god knows i was the biggest hater of the main ship on SO many of these shows#at one point#but it's just...easier for you...when you learn to make peace with allos being gross lol#like god knows i would NAWT write jafael or rina endgame in any universe#but at the end of the day...sigh...im just glad the lomls jane and gina are happy ig#i love seeing them all cute and happy and even the men have their moments sometimes#the only love triangle i have ever won in my life is cazzie and im still gloating over it 3 years later. so.#oh and maybe benvi ig#ginny and georgia#girlblogging.pdf
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It's so crazy to think about how these two almost certainly come from the same realm, as part of the same tribe
#god the chima helmet mold things were so fucking ugly im so glad Legos gotten better at making animal heads#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#raine's rambles#btw its odd like u CAN kinda see how their similar#like differences in molding aside#chima#legends of chima#btw off-topic the other tiger guy. tormak. actually apparently became a panther at one point#he got burnt up so badly somehow that he actually changed species#as crazy as that sounds#maybe smth similar happened to ras who knows#god imagine we got fucking ras backstory or smth and we saw older chima characters but re-designed to not look so weird#idk
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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anyway 4 alive people doesnt justify over 200 dead
#palestine#fuck zionism#and fuck zionists#no not jews#idc 90% whatever i refuse to believe 90% of jews support ethnic cleansing and genocide#zionists are getting blocked#israel is killing in the name of zionism ofc people are going to hate zionists#if there really is zionism that is exactly like my views then i dont fucking see it#all i see is right wingers#all i see is racists#all i see is people celebrating over 200 people dead just bc they got 4 ppl who were well taken care of#i am so fucking mad rn#the person i was talking to that i presses their beliefs blocked me and normally i wouldnt care#but it felt like it was civil enough. we differed in some things but then its obvious they dont give a shit#cant tell me why palestinians are prisoners not hostages? cant tell me why 4 ppl justify over 200 dead?#cant tell me how bulldozing olive trees in the west bank isnt part of the conversation?#I really fucking tried i really fucking hoped#that maybe there was something missing that really theres zionists who believe what i believe#which would mean coming together and bridging a gap thus influencing people#god im too naive#anyway#any day now israel is held accountable#i hope to hear statements from the hostages. glad their ok i guess#hard to care#when theres thousands of palestinian hostages they who come back looking dead#fuck israel
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god i finally watched new episodes my honest reaction is jgiwoaoKzmxmkwkakkak
#it kinda doesnt feel real for me idk why#like i do not actually process all of it??#tho I DO have ideas and thinking i did pay attention#maybe i've just had a wild day i guess#but also oh god vex'ahlia broke my heart#twice#first time were when scanlan was talking how he couldn't be at two places at the same time to help 'em and she said nobody gives a fuck#i feel so bad for scanlan rn i love him#haven't watched campaing to the bard's lament yet but oh fuck im too spoiled i do know what happens where (a little bit)#the second time was when she said she really cares for percy i started crying at that moment#also im a lil bit disappointed cuz i thought we would get percys death and vex's spech but we got “i open the door completly naked” scene ->#and im very happy we got it like oh wow i didn't expect that#but idk im just a girl and i love percahlia's slowburn#since i watched 64 eps of actual campaign it become hard for me to not compare campaign and tlovm cuz obviosly its very different#but with percahlia in tlovm we don't have hours and hours of campaign context#(we don't have percy making her arrows)#and i understand why cuz 100+ streams 3+ hours each is one thing and animated series with 12 eps of 25 minutes is another#but as i said previosly it is very hard for me to not compare it#by the way i do think changes in tlovm make sense#cuz like?? i think vex is more sharpy in tlovm than in campaign?? like#like she punced scanlan in first season and in campaign they are kinda good friends and i really love them??#*punched#and i think she's more ?? bossy i guess?? idk how to put it into words but in my head it makes sense “i open the door completly naked” ->#goes earlier than “i shouldve told you its yours” cuz shes playing pretend even more than in campaign???#acts like its casual when its actually isnt AT ALL#and im glad percy said “what is it i want” to vex cuz its kinda like that scene in campaign when percy talked to vax#when he called them all family for the first time and said he's trying to find what he wants in life#i love percy and vax dynamic btw#i wanted to write even more here but apparently i can do only 30 tags wtf#they want me to actually write posts oh no. hate to put it all in tags but im too nervous abt posting on the internet
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ima tell u this now : if u hate on x reader fics, block me cus by doing that you r doing us both a great favour 🤚🏽 ion need any of ur negativity on my blog because this is a safe space for people who do enjoy x reader fics goodbye
#𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆.#im gonna vent a bit in tags so ignore#bcs ive seen like two hate posts on x reader w a lot of interaction#and ima say this#leave ppl alone … maybe.. idk? like to each their own#its not that hard to block people if you don’t like their content#i swear we x reader writers wont even mind or notice if u do#we’d be so glad if u just block us completely#like god bless u for taking out the negativity (you) from our blog#i might not like oc fics but do u see me hating on them?? no bcs i just scroll past them#sometimes i even read them bcs thers no harm in trying out different things#and some of them are rlly good !!!#but ay just leave ppl be and stop acting stupid n pathetic 😟…#ofc everyone should tag their posts accordingly#i do too#but can u blame ppl for enjoying what they read?#ik some of u dislike it bcs reader is most likely written as a petite white female#but the x reader fics im reading dont have such descriptions added at all#yall just looking at the wrong stuff#but maybe its bcs i follow mainly poc / black writers 🤷🏽♀️#anyway i love when i can insert myself in fics and feel appreciated idk abt yall#but hating on ppls enjoyments is a bit.. childish#i thought we left that behind#and grew up#but okk!! do what u gotta do ig#main point: block x reader tags + the writers you come across#u r doing both of us a HUGE favour 😋 !#tw discourse#tw vent#cw vent
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Its so annoying when fictional characters clearly only do something because their creators are unimaginative about how to get more tv drama out of them
#ngl this is mostly about greys anatomy i keep thinking about rewatching it and then remembering that the version i made up in my head#is better.#the two biggest bugbears being Derek Shepherd's decision to stay with Addison - that was CLEARLY only so that the Meredith Derek will they#wont they thing could drag on#a man who walks in on his best friend and his wife in bed together and reacts by walking out of his marriage so hard#that he lands in a different city and persues and obviously considers himself single does not then REFUSE DIVORCE when its offered#i love Addison and Im glad we have her but she should have turned up to tell derek SHE wasnt going to sign the divorce papers that HE sent#(relationship difficulties between Meredith and Derek would still have ensued because he hadnt told her about an estranged wife - and also#Meredith has her own issues and Derek should also have been allowed to have his traumatic childhood delved into)#the OTHER thing i just do not buy is Meredith interfearing with the Alzheimer's trial. like. im sorry. i just dont.#honestly id have brought *Derek* being pressured by his former mentor and a 'what if it was Meredith' guilt trip- that actually could have#been interesting to explore- Derek proceeding to feel guilty and conflicted and also Derek's relationship with SOMEONE OTHER THAN MER#alternatively just....just have Webber do it? and Mer maybe catch him but not be sure what she saw???#ANYWAY#...
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well mark that down as situation 2938489 that I don't know how to handle
#i would love advice on this if y'all have any thoughts to share because i know what my parents think and im having trouble sorting it out#i love these three friends of mine but it is really draining to be around them now because all they will talk about is church drama#(re: our old church) and rehashing it all and being Outraged about the horrors etc etc#either that or being downright condescending about protestants/non denominations and acting like it's funny to talk like that all the time#i end up being more angry or resentful or exasperated at the end of our conversations than glad and at peace like i did before#(before all THIS ish happened and the three of them were like okay this is all we're going to talk about now)#i've tried to say in gentle ways (i am simply not capable of this kind of blunt confrontation) that maybe we should not be talking#so uncharitably towards other people especially behind their backs. like. yes bad things happened. we have to acknowledge that.#but continually making jokes and jibes at a priest's expense really rubs me the wrong way especially since i KNOW that he loves us#and in many ways was trying his best in the circumstances. and are we not supposed to be loving our neighbour#and is this not downright slander to keep going on this way esp since it goes on for HOURS at a time#anyway i don't know what to DO because if i keep chatting with them/meeting up with them conversation will be 90% this thing and i Hate It#but on the other hand i feel responsibility towards them because my godson's one of them and another is a friend who is a fairly recent#convert and if i leave them to stew in their own echo chamber i doubt it'll do them good#am i supposed to keep some distance? am i supposed to keep arguing whenever one of them says something unkind or inflammatory?#am i supposed to keep speaking up so that they hear a different perspective? am i supposed to run in the other direction for my own peace o#mind? anyway i am still thinking this over and it stresses me OUT#it used to be fun and life giving to be around these people and now it is so exhausting and seriously alarming in many ways
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i love my friends so much. i feel like yesterday i had a lot of shit going on in my head and i woke up to my friend explaining things in a way that put my mind at ease. i dont feel as anxious anymore because i know i was overthinking. i think my dad said it best when he told me that he thought my wonderful brain of mine just wants to think problems are bigger than they actually are. he is right! im just inexperienced in life and half of the time im scared im doing something wrong but- HEY. i need to be more confident in making mistakes. making mistakes doesn't define me as a person!! i need to stop worrying about doing life right and just live for the sake of living and doing what makes me happy!!!!!!!
#thank u blake. u really helped#also nessa!! thank u for that reblog about your perspective on my one post about feeling lost career wise#it helps me to know im not the only one living this life because holy fuck i can feel confused sometimes because.. am i doing this right?#and you know what? theres no correct path that i think there is but im just not good without a direct direction. it makes me a little#anxious about things#i dont know if its because i have some form of a disorder but i function better when i plan stuff out and give myself something to#decompress the problems and thoughts because in my brain theyre just all stuck and clumped together#and that can get a bit scary and overwhelming!!!#im just glad i have people that care about me. it means literally everything to me#so even if i dont 100% reply dont think i dont care because literally any ANY advice or kindness you show to me means the world#we're all just living this little life and we might as well make the best of it#people care..... thats just.... its good... it makes me feel less alone that people do#i love my friends so much#evennnn if we dont talk every day or are only mutuals in passing!!! it literally means a lot if people show me kindness#like holy shit!!! your older than me? and your dealing with a similar experience??? and your telling me that its okay??? and that itll be#okay?????#like#just the reassurance that things will be okay and work out and that im not the only one dealing with a feeling like mine#idk sometimes i just feel like im crazy and like my thoughts make no sense?? you know?? but yall get it#im glad that i have people who are older than me in my life cause yall have experienced stuff that i can use to be better#like your life experiences can help me in a way that can make a difference on my perspective on things#its why i like talking to my coworkers. because theyve seen things and done things i havent and their perspective can teach me potentially#i just dont feel so overwhelmed with life when i talk to people who understand#i feel so young and yet old enough to know but even the people who are older dont know so im sort of on the right track i suppose depending#on how you look at it#so- im just gonna live my life and smile because!!! you gotta.#you gotta surround yourself with people who can enrich you and teach you things for the better and make you want to grow#some of you are like that#you may not know that#but that kindness means so much
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Shouting into the void with a long rant, but I’m sort of confused by some of the takes I’ve been seeing about the Jikook NYC trip. Basically, I don’t understand why people think it’s weird that Jimin went radio silent or that neither of them have acknowledged the trip. I’m surprised because I’ve seen quite a few people saying this on multiple platforms.
Jimin never updates us on what he’s doing on a work trip? He barely uses social media or updates us on his life at all (can’t believe he actually forgot his password 😭) so honestly why were people expecting him to be actively posting things while in NY? He literally just went to London, completely disappeared, came back and then finally shared pictures of his HP tour on Instagram. And we still have no idea what he was actually in London for, he just ghosted us until he was back. So, there’s nothing odd about him going to NY and disappearing if he didn’t have a public appearance to attend.
At the end of Jungkook’s live he said he had schedules to go to that he couldn’t talk about, but that he thought ARMY would enjoy. Then he left and presumably met up with Jimin. So I think we can infer that the schedule he was referring to probably had something to do with whatever Jikook were doing in CT. And they had a camera crew with them, GoPros, and mics, so they were definitely filming content. Jungkook literally said in his live he couldn’t talk about what he was doing… so, why do people find it weird that they… didn’t talk about what they were doing? They’re especially not going to acknowledge something that is supposed to be a future project.
Anyways, there are a lot of interesting mysteries about their CT trip! And regardless of their motives, it seems like jkk had a lot of fun and Jimin was still physically present for JK during a monumental moment in his life. But I think there are some points that people are emphasizing as ‘weird’ or ‘significant’ or ‘suspect’ that have me scratching my head a bit because it contradicts what we know about them as individuals and the little bits of information we have about their trip.
And I’ll cap this rant post off with something else that’s been bothering me. It’s not weird or significant that Jimin didn’t appear in Jungkook’s post GMA live. That wasn’t a normal live, and it’s not really comparable to the one that JH did after Lolla or YG did after his concert. This was the first live that JK did after his debut as a soloist, and he used it to talk about the MV and his song. I’m assuming it was meant to be like the ones that the other members did where they talked about their albums a bit. That’s definitely not the sort of live Jimin would or should make an appearance on. It was basically part of an official schedule for JK.
#jikook#twitter is hell right now#so i'm using this space more maybe#to get out my intrusive thoughts#I'm sure there are plenty of things we'll never see about that trip#i think that boat moment might have been private#which makes it being leaked even grosser#but they were obviously recording things for a purpose#so all of these 'private trip we'll never see' takes#are really making me scratch my head#if it turns out we don't end up seeing the brewery or the boat#and they were up there for something totally different#i'll find all of this a lot more interesting#still the whole thing is terribly cute and im glad they had fun#also why did JM tease us about instagram and then never post 😭#it's like when he said he was going to do weekly lives and then disappeared for three months#he's like me
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I often wonder what the world would look like if pressing local or state level issues people claim to care about generated the same kind of action and enthusiasm that massive national news stories with complicated power mapping do. Idk even when I'm 100% with the people who are up in arms. Like what if just as many people in MA had turned out for the ROE act as turned out to protest the overturn of Roe after the fact? What if the rent control actions were as well attended as the ceasefire actions? I have had many instances where I am trying to get progressive people who regularly go to big demonstrations to show up for something state level they have said they care about and they just won't. And what I'm left with after that is the conclusion that where their interests actually are is feeling like a part of something big and heady rather than accomplishing a concrete goal and that's. Demoralizing.
#i am glad lots of people turn out for the big actions#demanding an end to the assault on gaza is very important#but theres a type of guy (gn) who goes to the big demos#about national or international stuff that the demo itself#doesnt actually put meaningful pressure on#goes to big marches in DC that are mostly symbolic#and never turns out for local or state level stuff#even if its urgent and we have a fighting chance#and its the same kind of thing they just went to dc about#idk im thinking of the difference between the like#sunrise climate “strike” turnout#vs coalitions trying to get new gaslines here stopped or banned#if all the sunrise ppl had shown up for that? maybe!#but it wasnt on cnn or whatever so they didnt
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i hope fics deemed objectively bad get even more popular actually
#idek why fandom classics are a thing#im just glad they exist most of the time. hey ppl were saying we were insane and toxic when this came out#now castiel is saying he's gay and in love with dean on my tv. love wins#give it another decade the fandom climate will shift#and fics that dropped this year will be dragged through the dirt in 2034 like 'why did ppl like this 💀'#ppl will understand the characters better. or just differently. pick apart the same media over and over#today's masterpiece is next decade's mid classic. who cares.#qeued post
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inadvertently stopped using my freckle fade cream without thinking.... right around the time i started making gifs of felix.... coincidence?
#positive influence.....#i do wonder sometimes how jarring it must have been for he and lil chris to go from australia to korea#bc i copped shit for being pale and freckly as a kid#i have a core memory of this girl talia wearing a country bumpkin costume with these cartoonish freckles drawn on and she pointed at me#and was like Lol im jessie haha and i was like Okay so you want to fight??#another time had to do some speech and when i finished and had questions from my classmates and two boys just asked me why i was pale#and why they could see idk i guess my bloodvessels in my legs ??? i didnt even notice like i was just like UHHHH idk ask about my topic#had so many instances like that and they werent terrible but it did make me insecure#like in the 00s here being tan was /it/ you had to be nice and tanned- go lay in the sun and ignore we are number one in melanoma deaths#like it was so consistently the thing... prob why i have so many freckles bc i didnt tan in the sun i freckled#but in both felix and chans aus photos they were quite tanned!#so imagine going from Hey go lay in the sun and get nice and brown ya pale fucker to Do Not Do That. Be pale as a ghost#white as fuck twilight vampire printer paper ass complexion or else you arent the beauty standard must have been so...... odd#idk beauty standards are so fucked and stupid#at least for me it was just like mean it wasnt like systemic. still wasnt nice but its not damaging the same way#but yeah I imagine some of the cultural differences must have been jarring and weird#like when chan said he was glad to get sex ed in australia bc it was comprehensive here and its not something i would have thought about#but yeah he went to school here and there he would know#idk must be hard to be an idol and straddle that line of not wanting to cause any ripples but having your own ideas and beliefs#oh i'd love to talk to him off the record lmao#dont take this as anti korea sentiment btw like australia is also wack#it just must be interseting and sometimes hard...#wow these tags are long SORRY
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honestly. being able to be honest with my loved ones about when i am Mentally Unwell but also Dont Want To Talk About It has done wonders for my mental health
#its nice just being able to tell people “im not okay! please dont focus too much on me tho!” and have them respect it#instead of doing things that will trigger me bc they are uncomfortable w the fact that im not okay#i deeply appreciate others sitting in their discomfort/holding the discomfort with me instead of comforting me#and like i get that ppl who offer space or time or comforts are trying to care for me but tbh its not welcome most of the time#bc when I'm upset often times it triggers deep emotional pain that only i can really manage by taking time to sit and calm down and Feel#(bc if not it becomes a flashback instead of Feelings from being Triggered) and having my attention diverted is actually distressing for me#bc i have to be grounded in very specific ways also that i just dont usually have the energy to explain bc like... i know how to do it?#and like also. i can just be Not okay. it doesnt have to be a Thing for me to acknowledge it#iderk what the point of this tag ramble is#im just like. really glad ive found people who understand that im not Avoidant just bc i have different needs bc of how my nervous system i#also if its not clear: please do not offer comforts for this. i am handling my own feelings and issues i just kinda wanna talk about it#also reminding myself its okay to not want to be comforted and that doesnt mean im Wrong or Bad or Resistant or Harming myself#(also ngl having a therapist who understands that certain coping skills may never go away but can be modified to be more useful is LIFE#CHANGING. DO YOU KNOW HOW FREEING IT WAS TO HEAR SOMEONE WHO ISNT CRAZY SAY “i can see how [these things] can be distressing and if you wan#to stop doing them we can explore new coping skills - AND if the distress from these coping skills is shame related we can work through it#and see what happens and its okay if you come out the other side using the same coping skills with a better understanding of yourself “#when most of my life every coping skill ive ever engaged in has been moralized (esp by therapists) and attempted to be beaten out of me.)#also I'm saying “comfort me” thru this bc even tho it's not actually comforting TO me when ppl do this ik thats usually their intent
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It always gets me how Justice did not change at all, like, he is not corrupted at all. It makes everything more tragic than it already is. The only thing that changed was his perception, which of course, naturally came due to the change of hosts. I'm mostly taking Awakening Justice into account and how he acts because that is where we can carefully observe him by himself, without Anders' influence on the matter. And his influence is everything on the point I am trying to make.
When we first meet Justice, he is fulfilling his nature of bringing justice to the people he thinks that need it. He is very outspoken about it, and is already ready to take action with or without Warden's help. For a supposedly peaceful spirit that Anders claims to have ruined with his anger, Justice is acting pretty angry here himself (This is not the only time either). This is one of the first things I want to point out that did not change much about the spirit. Justice was always fierce about his cause. However, what stands out to me in these scenes is when the witch calls him out on his idea of justice.
Justice, is that what you are calling it? What of their punishment, burning my house to the ground and with me in it?
Well, in this case, the witch is a demon and mocking Justice for funsies. But what she says actually gives a bit more insight about what kind of a spirit Justice is. The actions do not speak louder than intent to him, as long as it is within the lines he set for himself. In a way, he was always okay with a few… casualties in the name of justice. Even though it is as simple as burning down a house this time. Isn't violence for violence vengeance after all?
While we are on the topic of vengeance, let's not forget the way he is eager on avenging Kristoff, vowing to kill every darkspawn for his cause (I mean the way he literally calls it avenging is enough debate for some people but I want to continue). So how come wanting to take revenge on the offenders that wronged not only his host but many other people, is any different? How did this route did not take him to the road of vengeance but attacking the templars, who are also offenders that wronged his host and other people, is corrupting him?
The answer is of course, that it is not, it did not. There is no difference between those two for Justice, there is no difference between vengeance and justice. Punishing the ones who deserve it is all there is. There is no gray area for spirits the way there is in the mortal world, and we see this clearly in the way he judges Velanna and Nathaniel for their crimes. Despite what I said about him seeing intent before action, now he cannot see beyond their wrongs. This simply shows that if the intent is as clear as violence for violence, he understands. But he does not understand the gray area of Velanna mistaking the innocents as guilty, or Nathaniel taking back what used to be already his.
There might be none for Justice, but there is a difference between darkspawn and templars for mortals. For one, darkspawn are generally mindless, and has no moral compass for us to judge. Whereas templars are just people with different ideals about life, to put it kindly at least. (Which is worse, being a mindless cruel monster, or having the mind and morals to choose to be something else but going for being one anyway? Lol another discussion for another time). Templars are the gray area that Justice lacks the understanding of. When he vows to kill every templar like he did with the darkspawn, he does not suddenly turn into a demon, he is simply punishing the ones that were doing wrong, as he does.
From here we can say that spirits' judgments and mortal's don't exactly match up. Though, there is one idea that seems to match better than others, and that is corruption. As far as we learn from Justice, spirits do not know about corruption any better than we do. Spirit do bad, spirit go bad, right? So, when Justice starts to feel things that are associated with demons, such as envy, he starts to fear corruption. He says he does not want to learn how a demon feels, but he also states that he does see the wishful thinking of a demon wanting to cross the Veil for this world. He is conflicted at best about the whole thing. Still, he does not consider himself corrupted regardless. I think that the reason behind that is simply the fact that generally, the Warden can ease his worries when Justice confides in them. And that is another thing that says a bit about him. He seems to accept the lack of understanding he has in the world, and chooses to listen to someone who does. Though, not just a random anybody, someone he deemed just.
So, let's see. A fade spirit with identity issues and an anxious spirit healer walks into a bar…
When they merged and Justice accepted Anders' cause for himself, and when they went all crazy on the Templars, Anders was scared. He feared the worst immediately because he is taught the worst about possession. He knew that Justice was angry because of him and his ideals about mages. So he blamed himself, called it a corruption he caused. And as I mentioned, Justice is accepting of the fact that he has a lack of understanding of some things. Plus, he was already scared of corruption. So, when Anders, who is an educated mage about possessions and corruption claims that he is slowly corrupting the spirit, they held onto it.
Everyone in their life from this point on, do nothing but egg them on about it, on top of it all. They might not corrupt each other, but everyone else does by pushing them the idea that they are now an abomination. Anders starts to fear the nonexistent corruption more, and Justice is confusing the inability to just wipe all the bad out with sloth. We are talking about a being who comes from the Fade, which can be bent at will and a place of immediate action. This works well in Awakening because we are already fighting darkspawn nonstop, and we are in the middle of a war. But in Kirkwall? Everything requires planning and suspended ideals. Templars bring injustice everywhere they go, yet there is not much they can do. After many years of being held back, it is no wonder Justice is surfacing more and more, itching to fulfill his purpose. Because he was always outspoken, angry at the injustice in the world and eager to bring justice. He did not change, but Anders' morals and his' just did not align the way they thought it would. They forgot that in Justice, there was always a part that was vengeance.
At the end, Justice was one of the most stable parts of Anders' story. He couldn't count his vow in Awakening complete without reaching the root of the problem, which was the broodmother. And he could not do so in Kirkwall without getting rid of the Chantry. Because chantry is the root of the Templars, and being a bystander while you can help solve everything easily is unjust all the same.
Anders and Justice had the same cause, different morality and they were just confused because they didn't know any better.
#going through awakening again made me so annoyinnnng i cant stop thinking about justice#listen i have so much more to say#justice didnt become a corrupted spirit when he went on a vengeance run on the darkspawn#and he didnt become a demon when he went on another vengeance run on templars#but once people were included they became confused#and this kinda goes to show that spirits' morality is all about their awareness of a wrong-doing imo#spirits' idea of doing something “bad” could mean something totally different like they need to be held a different judgment on the matter#demons could be just confused beings with too much feelings they couldn't understand so they became them#if they embody their name as much as spirits do there is nothing they can do about it#they cannot simply be bad because the emotion is not the bad part about such things they are the natural part#the bad part of negative emotions are the fact that they cause actions that we mortals would count as bad#at one point what of the nightmare demon eating away the fears we would be glad to be rid of is so bad?#and justice going as far as a boom for his virtue isnt something we could judge him bad for its just his nature#y'know? does that make sense?#they were right to blow shit up tho lol#im sleep deprived#i wrote this for myself but u can also have it lol#justice#anders#justice positive#anders positive#dragon age#dragon age awakening#me own
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