#im glad i didnt kill myself last week :)

[fakehappy96]

Thank you for the birthday wishes!! 🎁 🎂👑🎉✨

I've had a really chill day; we went to a garden centre, had some lunch, explored the artisan shop (& got some Belgian chocolates), and I got to wear my fave dress!! 🩷🎂

[anime-grimmy]

Soooo, you've probably noticed Ive been replaying HZD recently so my mind's been stuck on the franchise for a while.

I finally took the time to actually try and experience Burning Shores for the first time, this time with an unbiased opinion.

Bcs, ngl, when it came out, I was very negative towards it for a couple of reasons. It already started out with me not being able to freaking play this DLC, even though I was so excited for it, cos while HFW was on PS4, the DLC wasnt. And Im wasnt going to buy a whole ass PS5 just for a DLC.

(I will get it once I buy a PS5 for MH Wilds though).

And then, ofc, the elephant in the room - Seyka, or rather Aloy's relationship with her.

I'll preface this with, though it should be obvious with my content, I do NOT have a problem with Aloy being in a gay relationship.

What rly irked me, and honestly still irks me, is that Aloy finally gets to experience new feelings IN A FUCKING DLC. AN EXTENSION A LOT OF THE PLAYERBASE WONT PLAY.

The second reason I didnt enjoy this decision was bcs it felt so rushed. I mean, we're talking about Aloy here! Miss "I dont have time for feelings bcs I gotta save the world"! Miss "I barely just learnt to let others in"!

From what Ive heard, the DLC is over the course of a few weeks/months, so it's not like they fell in love just like that, but Ive also heard that while playing you do not get a feel for that passage of time. I'll have to experience that for myself though.

Now that Ive had some distance from the franchise though, my feelings have changed a bit

Im not going to lie and say I now loooove this decision. No, I am still miffed such enourmous character developement for Aloy is stuck IN A DLC. Not to mention that it was such a bold move to try this with a new character, cos this relationship being perceived well hinges on the player liking Seykay and that fast. Imo she's a fine character but also nothing special.

Now, I do have to say, I am really happy that Aloy has finally come so far that she allows such intimate feelings to develop, or rather, that the devs let her be this way. I know a lot of us still perceive Aloy as this single minded protag, that wont let anyone in bcs "the mission is too important", so Im glad Guerilla shows us that Aloy has undergone quite the growth.

Im also pleasantly surprised that Guerilla has the guts to include romance for Aloy, bcs they were one leg in the "strong women need no (wo)men" pit, so it's great to see they dont let Aloy fall into that trope.

Now, for the FUN part.

I actually have a conspiracy theory, ie I am gaslighting myself on why such a big thing is stuck in a DLC.

I think Guerilla is testing the waters to see how players react. I am pretty sure they can gather the data on what dialogue options players used, so Im thinking this:

Guerilla is trying to gauge the player reaction on a) Aloy developing feelings, b) players thinking Aloy is ready/willing for a relationship, c) same sex relationships. They tried killing quite a few birds with one stone.

I have seen quite a few teasing, winky face posts and replies from Guerilla staff about romance options in the third installment, so my guess (delusion) is that the relationship is hidden in the DLC so Guerilla can plan on how much and obvious to include several romance options in the last title.

I know this is all just wishful thinking, but even if Seyka is a good character, I hope to fucking god that they dont just take that relationship decision away from us, esp with a character bound to a DLC.

Guerilla gave us such a wonderful cast of characters over the last two games, and if they want to give Aloy an "end game" in the third title, I hope they do let us choose with who. Or at least I hope they dont force a relationship we cant choose onto us.

Cos as much as Aloy is her own person, it is still US that make the decisions in game. Through our individual playstyles , we give Aloy our own interpretation. Now, we cant change her core values, but still, I hope to GAIA that Guerilla will give us enough wiggle room.

(Guerilla, Im begging you, Ive already waited 8 years, please dont let my ship sink)

[methed-up-marxist]

I found out im not an interested person today. They said I could be an interested person if i thought my conduct in the days leading up to your death might be called into question by the investigation of the coroner. I knew the coroner was too narrow-minded to see all the ways in which my conduct needs to be called into question. If they weren’t that narrow minded they wouldnt work for an organsiation that sees your dad as the best person to pass these details onto. I don’t want to fight over the official record, I don’t give a fuck about the official record if it is managed by beucracts who cant see all the ways i failled you. Why did i give you gear? Because i wanted you to be high with me instead of high with some shit head who breaks into your apartment when you dont give him what you want. But then I took 3 weeksto tell you thats why i gave it to you and now ill never get to tell you why i gave it you. Maybe i am an interested person. Maybe the brutality i unleash isnt actualy so complicated and nuanced. I’m definitely glad I’m mentioning it was 3 weeks before hand not 1 week. Whenever I talk about you I seem only unable to talk about myself. You were so multi-faceted i think like i collapse you everytime i go to say something about you. You were so fucking brave and yet you hardly left your apartment out of fear. You were so fucking clever and yet you didnt seem to get why you really cant keep flushing wet wipes down the toilet. I said to Lucy that you were a materialist through and through but you never quite got to be dialectical. I always exist one-sidedly, you always existed so one-sidedly but we both moved so fast through the sides. I like to think we trusted ourselves to exist in time, to know that we’d be the other parts of ourselves soon enough so why not be the part of us who we feel like know to the best of our abilities. The last part of you I knew was angry and paranoid. The last part I knew of me in relation to you was tired and out of patience. I don’t know if this is an injunction to move faster - to have got the bit of me that throws love and forgiveness to everyone who will take it as soon as possible or an injunction towards multi-sided patience. I want to prove that the way we lived is a way that humans can live, that if the material guardrails were there you wouldnt have to had of died, wouldnt have had to of been killed. I don’t know if I trust myself enough to make that claim. People loved the way we lived, everyone thought it was amazing how intense you were. Sometimes I think they wanted to cage you, I realise the spatial metaphor of a cage and of guardrails is the same except the second is lacking a dimension. A cage is a safety net you arent allowed to crawl onto the other side of. If I was as good at chemistry as you were I would say something about chirality. If I was as good at maths as I could’ve been I would say something about chirality. I guess i did put my right hand ontop of your left hand once and we were both excited to be talking about chirality.

[spamtoon]

DCRC PKNA Week 11--Silicon Time!

thankfully our little book club break has meant i've had enough time to rest, get into what is potentially a new hyperfix, and feel motivated to read paperinik! ...and um ducks on the road. at some point that's not now.

you know what. im feeling ultra relaxation for this issue let's go to the cove. nevermind i got distracted and entered the pizza parlor

angus fangus cosplay

starting off and first of all i have to say dear lord. the airport experience is indeed horrendous as someone who has been on an airplane recently the sign "clogged toilets delay flights" baffled me. like i understand why but im also like okay. the toilet is clogged. there are two toilets per plane surely the line woudlnt get that long

im gonna be real i thought big nosed human guy was gonna be exclusive to silicon. like i didnt think he would just. also show up here

the idea that angus fangus hasn't had a day off makes me wonder like. was the new zealand thing last issue technically a work trip despite the fact he was there to save his tribe. because if so that rules

it's nice getting to see scrooge again despite the fact he's probably gonna be written out of the story. i missed him

thought he was wiping his sweat with his money for a second here i'm goign to be so honest. and in the second panel he's sillouetted for no reason it amuses me. i mean i know why hes threatening to ruin donald and uno's situationship but he doesn't know he's doing that

i love you chilling in purple shirt donald

i love their little dumb mirco-bickers. they're so domestic

rip to whatever italian pun was lost in translation here. unless there was no pun and donald is just like ughhhhhhhhhh because he does not care

hi little drink serving robot... these things did exist in the 90s but they were very very basic and mostly for flash. which is why it would absolutely get on the news when the only other news is its hot. donald's pose and uno's response is also so cute im. who would have expected comic silicon would have Uno Content

ohohohohoho... oh no, how tragic! how tragic it would be if a certain robot enjoyer skipped to the next town over for this specific day--nevermind he's on vacation too he's at the supervillain convention in florida (SORRY)

cog these car panels are cool... i am once again praising paperinik action moments

rest in peace all the computers at duckburg technofinancial im glad they at least got a viking funeral

it feels so werid to see angus fangus in a tank top and shorts. he belongs in a trenchcoat. and i just

the way he gazes into the distance makes this panel feel so much more contemplative than it actually is i love it

i love how the evronians have a whole division that's job is just. to deal with xadhoom. who is presumably killing evronians off camera all the time

i hope its a story where its the computer in the tower that did it like we saw in the start but he's just messing around. he's just like hi uno!!! :) remember when ducklair made you i was there when you were born uno and he's like oh BROTHER this guy STINKS !

:// i know the computer literally said the evronians might be useful but like i saw computer wanting to use the spore hatchlings and i was so dissappointed. especially disappointed that he wants to shut uno down. i think. at least i assume its a computer hence the name silicon if it was silicon and it wasnt even a computer there was a guy in front of it i would be SO dissappointed but im pretty sure its the first ducklair sentient technology at this point

i have absolutely zero thoughts about this robot rhyno thing its just an important enough detail i have to bring it up. actualy i do have a thought and its look at him. he's so fucking stupid looking. neutral connotation ITS FUCKING DUE AGAIN? FUCK OFF DUE. i gaslighted myself into thinking we were gonna get a different computer but no. okay. alright

of all the villains to figure out donald's secret identity im so. two. of course. not that he's going to get it i dont know if they'd go that route but

im gonna be so real after his introduction issue i fulyl expected them to never use due again

this panel si so dramtic (i LOVE the rainbow windows) but out of context its just like TWO !!!! im so mad

i know its the 90s but i like how it was confirmed later in ducktales 2017 if due did launch donald like that it wouldn't have done anything as long as he thought about the triplets (or maybe uno in this case) hard enough. our bravest man on two worlds... (yes i know they're different donalds)

IM SO MAD donald just kinda handwaving away the duck avenger's inveolvement. they hate each other so much

im so mad the way he's just. at channel 00 news now. due and the evronians deserve to be fighting each other for a while i think

and that was silicon!! i enjoyed seeing more of uno but i was disappointed the computer turned out to be. due again. but maybe im just a little loser who always wants a new robot OOPS i miss lyla lay hopefulyl we see her next issue considering we're going back to channel 00. hoepfully she had a really good vacation while this was all giong on

[hauntedwizardmoment]

hi I'm sooooo fundamentally obsessed with your party oc lore and i come to you now to ask what the initial forming of the party was like!! what were their initial impressions of each other!! how did they originally form a group of professional adventurers, what was the story there? when did jace meet everyone? what's the early timeline on all the messy relationships and what kicked off the various jace/other party member hookups? did it take aurora a second to develop her grudge against jace and vice versa, or did they have it out for each other on sight? I want all the tea 👀

YAYYYYY IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED omg i literally screamed w joy when i saw this in my inbox last night... preemptively putting this under a cut bc i anticipate it getting long

so to start out i think that jace graduated from aguefort and then went to college. we don’t know a ton about colleges/post-secondary education in spyre aside from a couple of named places in the early eps of FHJY so i took that as permission to just. invent some. jace (in keeping w the idea of sorcery classes as art classes) went to the Arcane Arts Institute which is like, an analog for like. literally any art school in NYC. the student body culture is very nyu tisch (disaffected hipsters and gay people) combined with like, the prestige of parsons or the pratt institute or the school of visual arts. this is jace being like “i’m gonna get out of my shitty hometown and go to the BIG CITY and PROVE myself” 

[also as an aside bc this will likely never make it into a fic. I also made up a school for artificer programs thats called Mordenkainen’s Institute for Technomancy (MIT)]

the only person from his party who’s here is dagbert, who much like ragh is in an athletic program at another university, trying to go pro (he does not, like the majority of college athletes), and he and jace interact briefly in this ficlet, but not much throughout the rest of college. dagbert is busy with his classes and his athletic career, and jace is busy with classes and getting cheated on by guys who play electric bass. 

i think there are like, two other aguefort grads in the party, aurora and peregrine, who are a year and two years ahead of jace respectively, so they didnt interact much but jace does recognize the names. maybe a little unrealistic but like its a small world! two people from my irl high school in florida that had a graduating class of 85 people also moved over 1000 miles away from home to the midwest to work at the same company as i did!! crazy shit!! so there’s a bond there initially from being aguefort grads and growing up in elmville

so like the party is officially Formed by them all working for the council of chosen. like i think theyre all in their early to mid 20s looking for stable work:

jace (22) is like “well it’s this or try to find a fucking wizard to do an unpaid apprenticeship under in fallinel”

dagbert’s (25) athletic career falls through and he needs an alternate plan 

Peregrine (24) and aurora (23) are dating atp, peregrine wants a higher paying job and aurora is looking for a way to travel more for her mission work 

invidia (23) is like an established solo adventurer who’s been looking for a team bc she’s lonely

ysvelde (22) is an out-of-work actor who is about 3 seconds from pulling a patrick bateman style killing spree at the fantasy starbucks she’s working at. she NEEDS to move out of her mother’s house. 

they meet like a few weeks before they get sent out on their first mission as a team for like a “team cohesion” type thing; initially aurora peregrine and jace are like “omg we’re all from aguefort! thats so cool! did you have class with [insert teacher here]?” and jace and dagbert vaguely recall each other, but theyre all trying to be professional atp. but it doesnt take long (like a few days into their first mission) for invidia and jace to become the Party Besties bc theyre like moths to a flame. i think they find out that they like the same bands (in my head. jace and invidia listen to 90s riot grrrl) and hit it off from there. and jace and ysvelde are also bonding super quickly but like. most of that is ysvelde getting way too personal w jace way too quickly bc she finally found someone like her (no sense of identity and desperate to make friends by contorting yourself into whatever you think they’ll like). 

i dont have a suuuuuper solid timeline on the relationship drama bc i wanna keep it open for Extreme Mess potential. HOWEVER. peregrine and aurora’s relationship is SEVERELY strained by having to spend extended time in each others’ proximity without the distraction of anything else they have going on (friends who arent their mutual coworkers, jobs that dont have them working with each other, etc.). and when the relationship drama does start, jace cycles between peregrine (when he’s off-again with aurora) and ysvelde (who is so happy to finally be dating/sleeping with a guy who is actually attracted to women. fun fact about her, every single man she has dated turned out to be gay. the curse of being a straight woman in theater. s/o to kinsey 5 jace, it’s really doing a ton of heavy lifting here) with the occasional one-off thing with dagbert that doesnt involve a lot of emotional investment. 

the whole time jace and peregrine are falling harder for each other but peregrine is also desperate to settle down with someone as he gets older, and views aurora as the only “real” option because could you imagine if he brought jace home?? his parents would kill him! and somewhere in this poor ysvelde is like “jace what if we got married” and maybe in a manic episode threatens to have him eaten by her family of driders if he doesnt go through with it. dont worry it blows over they laugh about it eventually but jace Is afraid for his life briefly. 

NOW. jace and aurora’s whole deal. they kind of have friction right away after the initial recognition of having the same hometown wears off because jace is like “oh aurora is from that part of elmville, full of snobby helio-and-sol worshipping humans who think theyre better than everyone and pass judgment on everyone’s ‘lifestyle choices’ while being super hypocritical” and aurora is like “jace is an arrogant, hedonistic, heretical prick who’s way too comfortable making passes at my boyfriend and throws the fact that he gets special treatment from literally everyone we meet because he’s attractive and charismatic in everyone’s faces” and it slowly builds from there. but the buildup is slow, until ofc it’s not (peregrine comes clean about the fact that he’s been sleeping with jace for years during their breaks bc he feels like he cant propose to aurora without telling her about it, he doesnt want to go into a marriage with a guilty conscience)

[warrior-u-preservation]

Interview with The Path Podcast (Full written responses)

(Note: The interview itself will be different, since mod myne represented both mods on the podcast. However, this includes our full feelings on the questions that were provided to us.)

Who are you and how did you end up walking the path of a "warrior u" writer/comic creator?

Myne: I go by worldismyne for fandom related pursuits.

I'd like to clarify that Aisha Thani is the creator of Warrior U. Just like multiple people have written for Stan Lee's creations, I'm just a writer who's received permission from the creator to distribute and monetize works within her universe.

I've been in the WU fandom since 2014; at that time Aisha made the comic, ran an in character ask blog, a concept art blog and the main blog. I can only imagine how much work that was. A hard drive crash killed about 6 or so pages of Ambrosia, the last story arch she was working on; three weeks worth of updates up and gone. I watched writer’s block take hold and kill my favorite series in real time. Having to go back and redo work she’d already done had given her time to look at it and go ‘I can’t post this, this is awful’, but by then all of us were waiting for the next update for over a month, she couldn’t go back and rewrite the entire arch. It didn’t help that this was the origin story for a fan favorite character, so there was all this pressure to make it perfect. Instead, after about six artists made fan comics to feed the hungry fandom… she announced the end. The website, the blogs, one by one they all ran into issues and got shut down. Hundreds of pieces of art and story concepts just… lost. Once the comics were rereleased on gumroad, that was it, the fandom slowly died. Before this project, the last time the creator posted new content was in 2017. Then in the middle of the pandemic, out of nowhere I get 70+ notifications from Coffee reblogging the pieces of art I had saved from the old blog, including drafts from the unfinished issues. 

Coffee: well, i go by coffee online, im 20 years old and when im not working on my various personal projects i work part-time. i was introduced to warrior u WAYY back in the day (i think i was like 9-ish?) by my brother who found out about it through some unknown and mysterious ways. back then i had very limited internet access (meaning i could only visit sites that could be loaded by the internet app on my nintendo dsi), so i pieced together a bit of a plot from what i could find on google images. i wasnt able to fully read the comic until i was 13 (i had to BEG my mom to pay for the pdfs lol), but it had kinda always existed in the back of my mind ever since i was introduced to it. i decided a little over a year ago to start out the tumblr blog because i had recently read through the comic again and was really sad about just how hard it is (or i guess WAS now) to find a lot of things related to the comic. as the name of the blog suggests, its original purpose was to preserve/archive warrior u stuff so it could be more accessable to your average internet user who might not wanna go digging through internet archives. it was originally for official content EXCLUSIVELY, but myne talked me into also including fan-made content (and im glad he did, its WAY harder to find some fan content than i remember it being just a few years ago). its kinda hard to tell how good of a job it does at BEING that archive, but i like to think it could be useful to someone out there.

i had toyed with the idea of finishing the last official story arc- ambrosia- near the beginning of the blogs lifespan, but i knew that it was too big of a project for me to do myself. i didnt wanna dissapoint people by leaving the ALREADY unfinished arc STILL unfinished. i had written in the "about" section of the blog that the dream was a full fandom revival, but i didnt actually expect that to happen. when myne joined the blog we eventually started playing with the idea of finishing ambro. i forget how exactly we officially decided we would do it, but we did! at some point near the beginning of ambro, we had also decided we were gonna write our own fan-arcs and post those too, and the rest is history!

What was it about warrior u that made you say "this is it. i need to make more content of this."

Coffee: honestly? i think it was just how much i enjoy introducing people to the comic. i already make tons of fan content on my own time, so that wasnt really the crazy part. i had shown a couple of my mutuals the comic after i re-read it, and the feeling of seeing other people actually talk about and even make ART of warrior u was absolutely surreal. i guess thats what happens when you just silently admire a dead fandom for years LMAO! another big part of it was HOW the comic ended. after taking a hiatus, the creator ended the comic mid-arc because creating it just wasnt enjoyable anymore, and thats obviously completely fair. however, the arc it ENDED on was elaborating on the backstory of one of (if not THE) most popular characters at the time (and my personal favorite), so i had always wished that the issue could have been finished. its kinda hard to put into words, but finishing ambrosia was like a love letter to the comic and its creator to me. as flawed as the plot of that arc may be (and as unsatisfied with it as the creator was, at least back then) i still felt like it deserved to be finished. it was like fixing an old toy from your childhood, i felt like we were taking care of the comic in a way, giving it the love it deserves. maybe thats just my tendency to personify objects and get overly attached to them coming through, but hey thats how it is sometimes LMAO

Myne: When the comic was still on hiatus after the harddrive crash, some people had asked Aisha if she wanted to hand the series over to other artists to help her. She said she wouldn’t even know where to begin that process or if she’d wanted to do it. I would have offered then, but my skills as an artist and a writer weren’t nearly as strong. I held onto the drafts thinking, one day I’d do it. 

Myne: After Coffee and I started talking I realized, I can do it now. I know what kind of style of pens were used, and I whipped up a page, just the line art and sent to Coffee as a thank you. I thought, it isn’t much, and it’ll take me forever to color everything, but if there’s one person willing to read it, I’ll try. When I explained how difficult it’d be for me to color, he offered to do it for me. Suddenly a page that would take a month for just me to do on my own took 3 days.

Myne: Something, that seemed like a monumental task became a realistic goal. We were able to find, restore, and edit 45 pages within a few months. I’m still amazed we were able to do weekly updates without missing a day. Coffee asked if I’d ever be willing to write fan issues while we were working, not realizing I was the author of the longest fics in the series. Of course I said yes. Seeing Warrior U get finished, even through fan creation, was something I’d wanted to see for years.

You're from Az right, how is the webcomic weeb culture over there as opposed to california?

Myne: Idk about much about Cali, I've noticed the cons are more... professional? Where as Arizona cons have more of a fanclub vibe. Most panels are hosted by your fellow nerds rather than sony or production companies. I will say, that it's become more common and widespread in the last ten years, with multiple anime specific events year round. Back when I was a kid, I'd get made fun of for drawing 'japanese' people all the time.... it was pokemon fanart... Where as nowadays, I feel the average kid recognizes most big name titles thanks to hulu and such. 

What are your favorite anime/manga/webcomics and do any inspire your work?

Coffee: not really an anime, manga, or webcomic, but ive always been super inspired by the "scott pilgrim" series. when i was in middle school i was SUPER into it, reading all the behind the scenes stuff i could find. it even made me look into "comic illustrator" as a career option, but i also did the same thing with "game designer" and "animator" so yknow. as for webcomics, the only one i ever really got into was homestuck. side note- the overlap of oldschool homestuck fans and warrior u fans is FASCINATING to me. my current theory is that all these tumblr kids were looking for other webcomics to read while homestuck was on one of its MANY hiatuses(?) and so a bunch of them flocked to warrior u! theres tons of homestuck crossover content and references in fan art on our blog (some of the art styles also look homestuck-ajacent) so its at least clear that a lot of fans back then were also really into homestuck. ANYWAYS other than that i havent really read many other webcomics tbh? weird considering i MAKE one now but what can i say, im more of a Gamer than anything lol. as for anime, my favorite is easily keroro gunso (or sgt. frog if youre using the dub name)! its another thing i discovered when i was young (this time i was like 8) and have just never gotten over. theres a lot of Questionable stuff in it (prime example is an adult alien being madly in love with a 14 year old girl) but if i dont look at canon its not real so i love it anyways <3.i honestly dont know how many people really know about it since the western fanbase is so small, but its like HUGE in japan (or at least it was at one point, the titular keroro has a cameo in lucky star as a keychian) and the manga is still running to this day iirc. it was created by mine yoshizaki and the basic premise is that a platoon of frog-like aliens come to earth to take it over but they really suck at it. they begin living with humans and from there its kind of a mix between a slice-of-life and monster-of-the-week anime. i cant really say anything in depth about the manga because ive only read the first 5 issues of it, which are basically the same as the anime (fake fan smh), but ive heard that it gets more mature and serious than the anime does (which i guess is bound to happen when it goes on for so long). also the manga has some ecchi moments and blood used for slapstick purposes so if anyone wants to check it out just keep that in mind lol.

Myne: Obviously Warrior U. I'm a bit of a visual novel fiend, so Danganronpa is a series I've found a lot of inspiration from over the years. More recently  Though for the comic, I draw mostly from late 80s / early 90s high fantasy. Things like Labyrinth and Robinhood: Men in Tights. Honestly anytime I get stuck trying to come up with a gag, I look to Mel Brooks. 

So in continuing someone else's work, do you feel a sense of pressure to be just as good as the original?

Coffee: i definitely felt that way when it came to ambrosia, but i feel a lot less pressure when it comes to our upcoming issues. i wrote and made thumbnails for a few small scenes in ambro and i was SO SCARED of those scenes being noticably worse than the rest of the issue. i know the original creator has seen our version of ambro and those scenes by extention, but i dont know her exact thoughts on them. im satisfied with them but theres probably always gonna be that kinda star-struck stage feeling at the thought of the creator reading the scenes i wrote. its like getting stage fright. for our upcoming issues i dont feel as much pressure because theyre fully fan-written. our comics arent official in any sense of the word and theyre basically just fanfiction with extra steps, so its not nearly as stressful as trying to tie together an "official" story. there definitely WOULD be that pressure if we were ever given the rights to warrior u or something (which i dont want to happen) because then it WOULD be official yknow? also if the creator decides to keep up with what we post ill feel a bit more pressure, but i get the feeling that she wants to distance herself from warrior u a bit so im not sure how likely that would be.

Myne:  I do. Partially because, the fan content we’re making is completely free while the original series is purchasable on gumroad. So there’s a chance that some people may start with what we’re working on, then go backwards to the original.  I'm hyper aware of the tonal shift that's about to happen, no matter how much I try, I can't perfectly emulate someone else's writing style. The best I can do is capture the spirit of it. I just keep repeating "it doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to be". It's a little harder taking that advice now that it's my scripts we're turning into issues. There is some freedom in knowing the series was never meant to be perfect though.

What drove you to writing the longest fanfiction for the series and how did it feel to be recognized and promoted by the original creator?

Myne: When I was younger, I would write fanfic instead of paying attention in class, and I really wanted a full story about the leads getting together. Knowing that the creator was reading every fanfic at the time added more fuel to the fire. I had a guaranteed audience, the audience. I was so grateful that she recommended it to other fans. That fic was 25k, I've written about 100 K in the last year to help maintain interest in addition to new pages to the comic. To that I blame hyperfixation and hiatus brain. You have to be the biggest fan of the thing you're making.

So i see the that most of your work including the webcomic Warrior U is on tumblr why did u choose to promote om tumblr as opposed to other webcomic outlets like webtoons, mangadex etc?

Coffee: the answer to this one is actually pretty simple; i already had a warrior u blog and tumblr is the social media/blogging site that im most familiar with! we have recently started using comicfury and tapas, but that was entirely mynes idea. im personally pretty content with just hanging out in my little corner of the internet so any attempts to expand or get the word out is mostly (if not entirely) mynes doing LOL!

Myne: It's interesting you bring up those two actually. Webtoons recently come under fire for being pretty crummy to it's indie comics, particularly if you write in any genre other than romance. Mangadex is a pirating website, so most of the comics there are fan translations rather than uploads from the creators : they had a pretty bad data breach a few years back too. At first we only had permission from the creator to upload on tumblr. Once we got permission to move forward with the fanmade run, we branched out to tapas and comicfury. They seemed like the best options for the genre and style we write in. Even still, we see about double the growth in readership on tumblr as opposed to the other outlets, and I think that's mostly because the blog updates daily, even though we only publish one page a week.

Do you have any plans on creating your own webcomic/manga?

Coffee: yes and no. i sometimes draw small fan comics and id like to make more polished and "finished" ones in the future, but nothing with any kind of overarching plot, at least not in the near future. i have a very hard time making original content for whatever reason. i DO have one (1) personal project that is completely original, but i plan on making a game with that. then again i have NO idea what im doing with that project anymore so who knows, maybe one day i WILL decide to turn it into a comic! only time will tell…

Myne: I have a visual novel I'm working on. It's about teen super villains that have to go to reform school. Think teen titans meets gifted kid burnout. The game's been in development hell since our first alpha build and writing about apocalyptic civil unrest wasn't as fun as it was pre 2020. We're about 200k into the draft for the full game and we're having to switch engines, which means cutting a bunch of features, but we're slowly getting there. If that fails, I'll try adapting the story into a comic.

To those people who will see this and decide to strut down the path of comic creation what is some advice you can give them?

Coffee: i think the most HELPFUL advice i could give would be this: you dont have to do everything by yourself. i personally have taken tons of inspiration from indie artists/game designers/etc. some prime examples of this are daisuke amaya aka pixel (who created cave story) and toby fox (who created undertale and deltarune), who both made incredible pieces of art that were defining to me as a person when i discovered them either entirely alone or almost entirely alone. you hear stories all the time of these great pieces of art being made by one or two people, and ive always wanted to be like that. as a result ive alwasy had a hard time reaching out for help when it comes to my art, feeling like if i cant do it all alone that itll never be as good as it could be. as a result though, all this mindset does is keep things from actually getting done and needlessly stress you out. NONE of the warrior u comics would exist if i had never gotten help from myne, and the blog would have probably gone inactive a LONG time ago too. i think thats the biggest lesson ive learned from this whole thing personally. theres absolutely no shame in working with a team of people if thats what needs to happen to see a project be realized.

Myne:  One, try not to put more than 8 panels on a page, that's helped me a bunch with page layout. And two, find someone you can show your work to. That can be a friend, a mutual online, a family member; as long as you have that one person asking "what happens next" you can keep writing. The stories/comics I have that are the longest are because of that. 

What inspires your art and what would u say you consider your style to be?

Myne: Invader Zim, Danganronpa, and Pacthesis have heavily influenced my art style. (pacthesis made a series of free dating sims on deviant art). I've always considered my art style to be pretty shoujo manga, but lately some of my pieces have been labeled too western for weeb spaces.

What advise can you give the next person who wants to draw art and share it with the world?

Coffee: i give the same advice to everyone i meet that says theyre thinking of making art in any form, and i mean it from the bottom of my heart: DO IT! im so in love with art of all kinds and the process of creating it, and i think that getting into any creative hobby is nothing but a good thing and i deeply believe that everyone should do it. whether you wanna draw, write, make music, develop games, sculpt, knit, etc, do it! quality doesnt matter at all, you can make the most technically awful thing in the world but as long as you enjoyed the process of creating it then it still has value. dont be nervous about your art being good enough. if you dont want to share it then you arent obligated to! i dont share like 90% of the stuff that i make but i still create art almost every single day! recently my qpp (queerplatonic partner) has gotten into drawing and im SO happy for them. they primarily use mspaint and a mouse to draw and their art is SO adorable and i love it so much, and im not just saying that because i love them. it doesnt matter what skill level you start at or what tools you have, you can always start making art. and dont compare the art that you make to others art, which i know from experience is a VERY easy trap to fall into. i dont have as much to say about that point because im not as passionate about it but uhhh yeah :3

Myne: Social media algorithms are not going to make you happy; no matter how well you play the game and low engagement does not mean you're a bad artist. If you keep posting and talking to other artists, you'll find your audience.

So at wonder con where we met ylu were cosplaying power from chainsaw man with a group of girls who were cosplaying other chainsaw characters. Do you girls normally group up and cosplay and if so how did you get into it?

Myne:  I was born into cosplay. My parents were gamers and cosplayers, and I started picking my own characters to cosplay when I was 14. I started getting more into it in college when I could find other people to cosplay with, it wasn't until this year I started aiming for photoshoots. I tend to be in at least one large group cosplay a con, and bring a different costume every day.

What was your favorite cosplay you've done?

Myne: It's a toss up between Persona 5 Joker and Alluring Secret Rin. Those were the ones I put the most work in that still hold up. Though I'm currently working on Eris from the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, and that may overtake them.

Have you ever thought to cosplay someone from Warrior U?

Myne:  I do actually! I've cosplayed as the main character Finn a few times. I really like taking simplified designs from comics/cartoons and turning them into heavily detailed looks. '

Where do you see warrior u being in 5 years from now?

Coffee: man, honestly if were STILL working on this project 5 years from now that would be CRAZY. this is already the longest ive worked on a single project before, along with being the most ive ever gotten DONE for a project, so thinking about what it could be like in 5 years is like. WOW. by that point we would have archived most (if not ALL) of the older stuff we could find, so our blog would probably just be new pages and fan interaction if were still going! the dream is still for a full fandom revival, and weve already got a small active fanbase (of like 5 people but still) so who knows, maybe that dream will be a reality?

Myne: We have at least 3 years worth of story drafted and lined up, and even more outlined. So ideally still updating. By then, we'll have some physical releases of the finished arcs that we've written available for purchase online and at select events. The creator has said she has no interest in making physical releases of the original run. I'd love for that to change, but I respect her decision and I won't press the matter. I'm just grateful we have permission to sell anything we make using her characters. 

If you could go back in time 5 years, what advice would you give yourself?

Coffee: 15 and 16 were ROUGH ages for me tbh. i wont get into it because its super personal, but i was struggling with a lot and just generally not having a very good time. i think the best advice i could give to myself would just be that like. things will eventually get better. no matter how dark or hopeless things may be, theres always a silver lining and a light at the end of the tunnel. now if 15 year old me would have taken that to heart is a whole DIFFERENT question, but thats what i would say. 16 was like right before i (finally) started getting treatment for my mental health, so i think considering everything thats what i would say.

Myne: So many bad things happened during those five years, but… I wish I knew what burnout felt like, so I could recognize it. I have this tendency to put my self worth into “how much have you done today”, so once I started working full time and my father passed,  I couldn’t recognize that I was physically and emotionally exhausted some days and needed rest, so I’d just punish myself mentally for not being more motivated. You shouldn’t need permission to rest, and I felt like I had to. It’s healthy to ‘nothing’ sometimes, especially if you’re dealing with things you have no control over.

Coffee: thank you for interviewing myne and i for your podcast :D!! its absolutely wild to think that ive done anything interview-worthy and yet here we are! for anyone thats interested in the comic because of this, i also emplore you to go check out the creators current comic "si3lah" (pronounced like si-ayn-lah i think? the 3 is a stand-in for an arabic letter) on gumroad! it deserves way more attention than it currently has and you should 100% go support the original creator if you like the stuff we do (wink wink).

[spiteless-xo]

curious anon here if you remember me from a long time ago!! i finished tbaw and the ending was beyond perfect, i couldnt imagine a better ending reader and erens character development made me so emotional 🥺 i have so many things to ask you! what were you feeling when you posted the last chapter? im so sad i wasnt along for the weekly updates but i scrolled through your asks around halloween and everyone was so excited!! also the whole last chapter i was imagining jean with red eyes n an overgrown lil beard 🙊 as much as i hated him im glad he didnt kill himself hahaha i saw a lot of death threats in your comments anyways thank you spiteless for writing such a perfect fanfiction i enjoyed every second of it !!! youre the best <3

i remember you! but i cannot for the life of me find your previous asks so i have no idea what we talked about before hahaha i need to get better at tagging

i’m really happy to hear you enjoyed it!! 🥰❤️

it was very exciting but also kinda sad posting the last chapter 🥺 i was so happy seeing everyone’s comments and getting asks every week, so the final chapter felt kinda like the end of that too so i was a lil sad. but also i was so excited at the fact that i actually finished something!!

and since then i’ve had the whole thing printed out and i’ve had about four (maybe five?) of my irl friends read it hahaha which is embarrassing but also kinda cool

i write mostly for myself, but i can’t lie 🙊 getting to talk about tbaw with everyone and seeing everyone rip their hair out after each chapter was so so so fun and im so grateful that so many people loved the story ❤️❤️❤️

[nikos-diary]

forgot to write my entry last night oops ! but yesterday was my first day of school and it was pretty nice. I couldnt sleep the night before though. But anyways, i ended up getting to school late after an hour and a half long bus ride. For some reason, my bus driver went through the bus loop for my school but didnt think to stop? So at the exit i had to call him like hey dude this is My School Tf. He got upset at me cus apparently he called for mcfatter students but im deaf, i cannot hear sometimes man. Anyways, in first period, i sit by myself in the very back, and i mean bymyself, no one occupies the desk in front or to either side of me. Im thinking of moving up a seat today to sit behind a kid i know. Then i wont be isolated yk. in second period, i got a new math teacher and hes some old guy who IMMEDIATELY jumped into the lesson, i was like okay wow damn bros excited. it was easy to understand. i hope i keep understanding the math, i hate math when i cant understand it. like it sucks dog when i cant understand and then i give up and nearly fail. I like when i understand. Anyways, then was lunch, and i met up with a friend i havent seen since middle school. Im a junior now so its been about two years. But they told me that on the last day of school , i interrupted a confession from someone else to them and they were glad i interrupted. I felt kinda bad for interrupting but at least i helped? anyways, i had to show two new kids how my schools lunch works, and they both like culinary food. Both got the wings and chocolate cake and stuff. I just bought a soda. after that was my tech program. I was rlly excited to see one of my friends but apparently HE SKIPPED SCHOOL YESTERDAY>:( so i didnt get to see him. but . whatever. Hes coming today ! :3 but my texh program is multi media and im really excited to start except we cant rlly start until we have both teams and our adobe accounts up, which might take a week. So free week? But im antsy to start working already honestly. but it was nice and fun to be there, im excited for the rest of the year. Afterschool was bus, and i was in a different bus loop this year so it was confusing. And so many more people go to that bus loop, so it was also overwhelming. And hot. Summer heat sucks :( i was sweating so much, and im wearing jeans anx a leather vest and a button up, and none of those are good for heat. so that sucked. I got home around 6, which is normal. my sister told me she needs to use my computer for her school and i got upset because thats my computer why cant you use your computer i dont want you in my room asking for my computer when i need to do My work. so im working on fixing the old computer again. The old computer is the computer i used to use before it killed itself and its now being an absolute ass to me. refuses to work >:(. but i hope i can work on it more tonight.

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

i don't get it. im in a position where i can make so much progress. ive had interviews damn near every day this week. I go to therapy now. i dont do pills. i eat. i try to talk out what im feeling more. but its just not enough. theres STILL something there and im edging closer to it. i can feel it. im on the brink of something horrible. i dont know what's going to happen once i reach that point. im scared of what'll happen. but it feels like once it comes i wont be able to hold back. i genuinely dont know how i did this before

being so busy.. i think it was a buffer. i never felt involved in my feelings really. id just ignore them and hide them away. in one hand, im glad i am where i am. the highs i feel feel so different from back then. ive never felt satisfaction like i do now. some times anyway. but the lows STING. i can really simmer on them now. it gives the gnawing insecurities Ive been feeling a meaning. a place in me that i have to accept. i have to actively accommodate for it all now. or ill implode

every day feels like a gamble. i cant express how little i want to do/be here. i dont care about any of this fr. i care about hurting people. its paralyzing. Ive always been such a people pleaser and i cant let it go. I will minimize everything until i absolutely cant anymore. and atp i feel so backed into a corner. my only two options seem to be either blow up and forced somewhere until i can find the drive to do something other than killing myself... ooor... kill myself. i swear that wasnt on purpose lmfao. but seriously. i mean what are the other options? i can barely push myself to do anything anymore. i dont care to. id isolate from everyone if they didnt reach out so often. well that and they notice now. ive ghosted everyone too many times they all know to just act sad so ill come back T^T

i get really tempted to tell my best friend about all this. i feel like i talk too much about myself nowadays. or talk too little or too boringly on others. but then i reread ts i used to say back/how i used to say it and i think ? i prefer us now ??

HA nah. im sure its the insecurity talking. i really do love her. she is the one and only i know will stick around no matter what. no matter how boring or how angry i get she does not hate my guts. i wish i didnt like her so much tbh. it makes me angry how angry i get with her sometimes. i cant help myself when i notice something off. shes the one person i can openly express my frustrations without consequence. but i take it too far cause of it. ive had no experience with that sorta shit. i try to be better to her cause of it. i think its only fair. the junk ive put her through this last year.. the rage ive thrown at her. thee inattentiveness. selfish. ive been too focused on making myself feel better that ive let her sting because of it. i want to make it up tenfold. she deserves more. and if i cant have her in the way i want her, i will do my best in whatever place she wants me in instead. for now, thats been a more casual friendship. she doesnt talk to me as much about her feelings. her heart is really broken about her ex. as much as i dont understand what she sees in her i know that she needs her time to bounce back. i think shes getting it out of her new person. she talks about how annoying she finds her and how she disrespects her boundaries a lot. they broke up almost immediately. but she stuck around because she felt obligated to and now i think theyre building something better. hopefully. i dont meddle as much now. i dont want to hear it + prying shit from her is NOT worth the effort. when shes ready, shes so eloquent. i love listening to her talk. even when its about nothing

im gonna stop babbling about her now. i wish i wasnt so close with her i swear i make myself disgustingly obvious.. anyway. i bring up all that to say, her battery is dead. i want her to focus on making herself feel better for now. she needs to stop overextending herself so damn much. i wont let myself be another burden for her to bear. though with such a giant rush of new feelings and a single person that i know loves me no matter what.. its kinda hard

i wish that i could talk through everything with her. if only it were that easy.

i think im going to relapse not gonna lie. it makes no sense not to. ig for my health but aside from that? itll help me feel more careless. i wont need to cut myself, i wont need to blow up, i wont need to think anymore. i can just focus on acting sober annnd holding down a job. much easier than holding back whatever this is now. if this could come out of me without leaving a broken mess, i would. but if i ever told anyone my true feelings id make them sad. i need to lash out to gain the momentum to bring it up.

im gonna stop writing now. i feel like ill go on forever again.. its just been tangent after tangent

[0thsense]

20 12 2022

wow it has been a while since I last posted. i dont remember the pet names i gave people anymore, so ill just have to use new ones. so yea things havent been going very well. after all these years im still unable to do work, so i cant really hope for anything in life. id like to say im seriously considering an heroing but im probably objectively still far from that point. its almost like i wish i was actually considering an heroing because that means ive already hit the bottom and dont need to worry about feeling even worse than i do now. looking back, its hard to see all the factors that led me here, but i guess i can share a couple things i experienced recently. im still not sure whether to write this as if anyone except myself will ever read it, so idk if "sharing" makes sense. anyways, benny visited recently, and shared how after breaking up with his long-term girlfriend of 3 years, he had a "wayward" phase where he just fucked hella girls basically. and he felt super bad about it because hes a pretty devout christian. i understand why he shared it to me because im in a unique position of understanding christianity with my christian background but not actually christian so he wont just get judged extremely hard by the church. despite that, it still kind of felt like a brag to me, and a little insensitive since im a fucking virgin, which idk if ive told him explicitly but he surely must have considered the possibility. its unfortunate because i consider benny to overall be a really good and understanding person. of course i didnt tell him any of this and just took it as he shared for hours about his conquests and his inner conflicts from just having easy access to sex, oh woe is him right. i told him to just never meet girls like me, maybe he got the message after that. more importantly i had a dream, let me try to remember the details precisely. i was in a clubhouse of some sorts (maybe for pingpong?) that was pretty packed with people, it started small but slowly grew since i guess i love fantasizing in my dreams that my presence helps communities grow. one day we were celebrating something, maybe a member's birthday or something, and i was hanging out with one of the newer members jessica towards the back. I forget what we were talking about but it segued into her starting to whisper to me something like, "you know, I might not have made it to this clubhouse ... I was very close to killing myself the week I first came here". by the tone of her voice and her expression, she was clearly being extremely vulnerable and entrusting to me. my first instinct was to say meekly (in my usual style), "well im glad you're here now" or something like that, and then the dream abruptly ended. I realized after I woke up how utterly pathetic that was. I was so concerned with how my response would appear to her, I was only concerned with staying in her good graces. In the past I was not so concerned over my appearances to this pathetic of a level. If I was thinking about her instead, I would have let her know that she did not have to worry anymore, that she should never have to experience that misery again, and I would make sure of it. I really wish I can say that and mean it one day. I'm of the opinion that the most useful individual definition of reality is simply one's experiences. In that sense dreams are real until you wake up and realize you've been dreaming. That's why I never want to lucid dream again, at that point it's as real as simply fantasizing during the day when you know you are fantasizing. Dreams are precious because they are the only way you really experience dreamlike scenarios, and in today's one I fell gravely short. I'm sorry jessica. I have some other things I want to write but I think I will save those for another day, with the usual disclaimer theres a 50% chance this is my last post ever.

[kng-fisher]

Waiting for my anxiety meds to kick in like, boy, is my heart trying to explode for real or is this just a real bad panic attack

[courtney-deserved-better]

whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

[eggumura]

((have a drabble i made for sasharcy week day two: calamity))

((im drawing most days, but im doing these drabbles for the days that i didnt have any ideas for, so i've got one more planned!))

There’s no real way that he can put it into words.

His best attempt to explain it would be wrapped in juxtaposition and paradoxes; it was sudden, but it had been creeping up on him for hours prior; it held him in place, but it made him strong enough to finally move; he felt powerless against its force, but he knew that it was his greatest strength and ally.

When Anne had come clean about her own experience with her ‘calamity form’ (Marcy came up with the name, and neither of them were about to tell them no after everything), she had made it clear that she hated it. It felt awful, she said, like the eye of a storm. She never wanted to use it again, and she was mad enough at herself already just for using it as many times as she had. Of course, Sasha had done his best to support Anne, but he can’t stop wondering why she saw things so differently than her.

Maybe it’s a lingering part of his ‘past self’. Maybe it’s just the part of him that he wishes wasn’t still there, the part that still screams for control, the part that’s too eager to resort to violence. Maybe the simple fact of the matter is that Anne is a better person than he is.

But he’s grateful for his power.

When he was too stupidly weak, too tired and too in love to do the right thing, he had been pulled along by something he had given up on assuming he could do. It made sense that he wouldn’t be able to tap into his gem, after all, after it had been charged. But then Marcy- no, not Marcy, it wasn’t them- had done it. And their gem was also charged. And Anne wasn’t going to get them out of this mess, not while she was carefully herding the citizens of Wartwood out of danger and nursing a near-mangled arm. In that moment, Sasha knew that he was the last line of defence, that he had to stop the Night because nobody else could.

But he didn’t want to.

Because the only way to do anything, in that moment, would be to hurt Marcy. And he was- and still is- selfish enough to put the whole damn multiverse at risk just because he doesn’t want to hurt her.

That’s why his powers had been somewhat of a miracle when he snapped into action and did the right thing, for the first time in however long. Through the blur in his mind, he managed to hurt Marcy, and then he managed to save them.

And, when his mind came back to him, he was on the ground, and his arms were heavy and warm and itching with the limp weight held in them. There was no subtle glow from under Marcy’s eyelids. He hardly knew what had happened, but he breathed a heavy sigh of relief and pulled them in closer. All he could think with certainty was that he was never going to let them go again.

Now, he looks over at Marcy, in bed at eight pm, because they got so tired so easily these days, and he’s glad. Even if Anne denounces her old powers and insists that something bad would have happened if she used them any more than she had, even if Marcy quiets down and glazes over whenever the conversation turns to them, Sasha’s glad that he had that power.

He groans internally at his insufferable past self (you know, from the distant times of literally a few months ago), and thanks those weird cryptic gems.

Because without all of that, he wouldn’t have been able to be here, with Marcy, sitting up next to them in bed and checking their pulse too often for somebody who claims to be okay. He wouldn’t feel that unsettling and addicting warmth from where their head rests against his side, and he certainly wouldn’t be so embarrassingly and obviously in love.

With a barely-there smile, he shuts his phone off, leans down to press a kiss to Marcy’s forehead (smile only growing as they giggle and lean further into him), and decides that it wouldn’t kill him to sleep early, just this once.

((i am literally so unhappy with this but im forcing myself to post this because i want to do something for every day of sasharcy week OOPS))

[anarchistbitch]

hi hi hiiiii

your taste? immaculate (im watching our flag means death as soon as it's holy week (it's a national holiday here)) im glad you enjoyed your rest despite how short it may have been, here's to hoping that you'll get another break soon

hills are pretty as long as i don't have to walk them lmao, it sounds really lovely btw :'3

my col got over very quickly, only lasted like a day and a half thankfully, mask mandates haven't been lifted here actually and i think what i got sick with was not sleeping well enough, letting night dew fall on me (idk if that's a thing outside here but they say that can make one sick) and then spending the rest of the day in the sun bc of a class, also im thankful the cold didnt last long bc i absolutely hate drinking warm water, maybe it's bc im from the coast and it's always hot as balls so i always drink ice water but i seriously hate drinking warm water and i know drinking cold water is bad when one's sick but that's one thing im completely childish about and cannot bring myself to do (sorry for the rant lmao)

camping was really so hilarious, i feel kinda bad for seri bc taesung could not care less about her in that way, taesung on the other hand has his plan working, haebom may not know that taesung is trying to hit on him, but he's falling anyway and re the firewood scene, i do agree <33

im on the floor crying every time im reminded that it's only 8eps, the world is so cruel, at least heartstopper is coming soon and i really do hope we get s2 them being adorable together kills me in the best way possible

at this point i dont have a sleep schedule, i sleep as much as i can, whenever i can *sigh* but im getting a small break soon, two weeks i think to holy week

you're going fully offline then?? cause rn we're just doing it for the classes that need it the most, theorical classes like history are still online for us

i only have two classes offline so there's not much schedule to memorize but after a certain point the routine will set into you and you'l be able to remember itwithout needing to read the schedule and get you jshk wallpaper!

they were soaked in the river of talent much like achilles in the styx i swear to fuck, and their songs hit so hard, i cannot listen to lie by jimin without feeling literal chills, and dionysus is my go to pick me up bc as soon as it plays i want to dance and scream the lyrics, it fills me with so much energy, rumor has it they'll be releasing some new songs soon and i cant wait :'3

holy roller is neat indeed, i really liked it! my own rec is emily by san fermin

arroz con pollo 🤝 biryani

discourse about how to make it that is ultimately useless bc mom's the best

i hope they do watch it!! im also trying to get more people to watch it, i need to see it succeed, and yes! yasmin is stunning, im sure she'll do Elle right :'3

i havent watched turning red yet bc im gonna watch it with a friend and our schedules havent aligned yet, it's hard to coincide when we're on different majors and specially when those majors are one a trimester career and the other a semester one but everything i've heard about it is good things! i also saw the 4 town in universe guide thingie around here and we laughed bc Jesse having two kids reminded us of the 'theories' that RM is married to that one guy from his pics, and that they have a kid together im laughing as i type this bc skdlfkdfhfjsdf

promare is such a beauty, visuals and audio are absolutely stunning, i hope you like it!

jfhgjhgkjsj battinson is such an inspiration, his makeup 👌🏻✨ a friend and i were talking about going to the movies to watch it again but he's got all his classes on the day that im free and when he's free i have class at 5pm so we'd come out too late and im too akward to ask him to take me home, not to mention that i doubt my parents would like me being out until 9pm with a guy they dont know, ah the pains of being female presenting in a latinamerican country

thanks for the tws!! i dont think any of that would bother me but it's always good to have a warning, i also saw it was a sequel, should i watch the first one??

hjfsfjdf i get heart eyes everytime i see you've replied 🥰

sending you lots of love and hugs and i hope you have a nice, relaxing weekend!! stay hydrated and eat lots of good food!!

HIIIIIIIII💗💗💗💗💗

OMG OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH!!!! it started out as a fun comedy show and now has my whole heart like the acting?? the crew dynamic?? it being found family🥺🥺🥺🥺[and whoever made blackbeard's beard. god bless].

bro im literally christian and still forgot that holy week is coming up😭[🧍‍♂️ my baptism is in two months too....]. anyway hope you enjoy your week off!!

i really love hills so much cause the scenery and yk when you do a long trek and your so freaking tired but then you go to the top and see the view and its like "oh" and the entire trek was completely worth it because you get to see the world in a completely new perspective and its just. mindblowing right?

im glad it wasnt smth more serious and not in the exact terms but i think it is a thing here too. stay safe tho!! dude i grew up near the coast too!! the summer months were hell and it still is kinda where i live but its milder here . for now😭. until its summer my mom BANS making ice cubes/ ice water cause i get sick easily and im more used to drinking hot water cause of that. BESTIE I LOVE RANTS ILY PLS DONT HESITATE TO TALK TO ME🗣🔊🔊🔊!!

im waiting until thursday to watch ep5 cause *gestures at schoolwork* but the way taesung had that one picture of them as kids in his wallet🥺🥺🥺 childhood friends to lovers trope is so *clenches hand*

the way april for me is literally scheduled around schoolwork and the release of my fav series💗 ALSO . are you gonna watch kinnporsche!!! i saw the first trailer a while ago and 😳😳 and the final trailer too,,

my daily routine atm is just: sleep->study->school-> scroll on tumblr and boy is it tiring. im trying to early bird kills the worm and all but im just tired tired tired about it. but bro you gotta sleep properly!! you already got a cold!! at least 7 minimum per day!!

we went fully offline and its better in a way but the commute with my heavy ass math book is so grueling like my math book is SO fucking thick im literally carrying my other textbooks in my hand so i dont pull my back T T

theres a new schedule coming out so i just wrote down my schedule on my journal and changed my wallpaper into a whale one(its purple. like smth else.kfbrhoi i hope you get it)

theyre collabing with THE snoop dog AND ITS SO *excited noises* and bighit said theyre not confirming right now so we know its basically confirmed. i was watching bts american hustle and it literally amazes me cause their talent comes from a place of hardwork and practice and they keep improving each comeback and that thing about other artists pushing their schedules when bts perform like theyre on another level entirely btw ur feelings on ddaeng ?

emily by san fermin was nice!! but the song's cover reminded me of this one horror book and listening to it with a horror vibe😳 changed everything .

arroz con pollo🤝🏾biryani 🤝🏾 us eating our mom's food while everyone else argues about

i cannot wait to see heartstopper and yasmin finney! is !so ! freaking! beautiful!!

no see the thing is I get it okay. i get the hype for 4*town. like if i was in the turning red universe i'd undoubtedly be a fan of them[and everyone having nobody like u on their on repeat *victoria justice voice*i think we are ALL 4*townies][also one of the members being based off jimin is so *waves hands around* like they didnt say it out loud but we all knew]

halloween outfits this year is gonna be lit🖤 hope you get to watch it battinson soon!! i feel you about parents being weird with other male friends😔

its not exactly a sequel its more just inspired by(they have the same actors) i havent watched it but its a hindi remake of the tamil film that i have watched(its basically about a guy trying to find solutions for his erectile dysfunction.yes you did read that correctly) . theyre both thematically very different movies with no context dependent on e/o so you dont need to watch but if you wanted to i did hear it was p good.

placing good vibes, good health and lots of free time forward in ur way (u cant refuse i put a clause in the T&C)

[mollyhale]

fuck you. it is not fair to me for you to tell me i didnt suffer enough for her death. it’s not. it’s also not fair to him that you think i suffered too much for him. i suffered for them both. i grieved and still grieve for them both. one was nearly a decade ago, i’ve come more to peace with that one. it still aches in me, but i’ve found more peace in the passing years. the other is fresh. still new, still only two years ago. i’m still grappling with that one and finding my footing again. you’d hate to hear this, i know you fucking would, but they’re different. they’re different and they deserve their own respective grief and memory, but they’re different. to put it bluntly, and i hate to put it so for my self, but one was more expected and the other was so shocking. im sorry, im sorry, im sorry, but it’s the truth. she was old and she was at the end of her rope, she gave us all that she had and nearly made it to 100. respectfully, and only respectfully, i’ve come to terms over time that that was her time to go. there’s nothing we could have done. and quite frankly, i’m glad she doesn’t have to suffer through the world that’s come after her. as for him - he wasnt supposed to go like that and you know it. he was not supposed to be killed. he was robbed of a life ahead of him, and didn’t even get justice in the sentencing of his killer, and yet - i suffer too much for his loss. how is that fair? how am i not allowed to grieve for a loss that was unprecedented but i must kill myself over nature running itself to the end? i love her, and you know that. you know that and i should not have to prove it to you. i suffered for her. i grieved for her. i did a lot of it in private, and that is not something i need to dig up and write out for you like a research paper to prove that i did my time and properly grieved by your standards. everyone grieves differently, and i’ve been grieving since i was born. 

i did not speak to a single person that first week when she passed. i broke down sobbing in the middle of the day because i thought i heard her voice in my head as clear as day. they made me see a counselor after that episode, did you know that? i had to read a book about processing death because i couldn’t. i lived in denial for a solid three years, every night believing she was still in the hospice. i still write about missing her in my journal. i cried to myself at night silently so no one would hear me. i would try my damnedest to get some sort of proof that she was out there looking out for me. i was a fucking kid trying to grapple with loss. i would set the table every night with a place for her so she never felt excluded. i kept making the same amount of bread she always did for herself so it wasnt as though she was erased from the routine. i sit in her spot at the table so no one else does because i dont feel anyone deserves to sit there but her, so i want to protect it from any strangers you let into the home. your mother sits in her spot just the same for the same purpose. have you ever seen anyone besides the two of them sit in that chair? i still call her room her room. i dont address it as a guest room, it’s still her room. i was the one who begged you not to touch the bookshelves in her room and get rid of the books that had been there my whole life. but oh, wasnt it you who insisted on throwing them out and did so anyway? arent you the one trying to sell the couch from her room despite my protests? you wanted to sell the house, the house she lived in and loved all us in. you want to get rid of the last tangible bit of her we have left? i could hardly communicate with her due to a language barrier and i still loved her as if there was nothing stopping us from communicating. and who’s the one who remembers the day she passed? i mean the actual date. you don’t even know the day or year she passed. i remember. i remember everything about that day. like how you kept me from knowing she passed and wouldn’t let me see her. wouldn’t let me say goodbye. wouldn’t let me come to the burial. that’s all YOUR fucking fault.

i dont ever want to fucking hear how i didnt suffer enough for her. i did, i do, i always will. im more at peace with it than him, but by fucking god, i am filled with grief for her loss. and i dont want to fucking hear how i shouldnt be suffering for him. how he doesnt deserve as much grief as she does. they are both entitled to all the love i have to translate into grief because i loved them both. one was family by blood and the other chosen, and i love them both and i love them both in different ways. this isnt fair. you’re not being fair. this isnt fair. 

this isnt fair, this isnt fair, this isnt fair.

[darkelite020]

Bad Batch thoughts & predictions Ep 7

Continuing these written reactions/predictions somewhere cause itd be fun I think to see what actually ends up happening and remembering what I thought at the time so im dumping it here, youre welcome. (Feel free to discuss if you want) if you want to keep up with it im gonna be tagging these as #jay rambles about bb

- Ruby? Did I forget? Who/what is Ruby? -- Oh ok. Interesting bounty I suppose. - Wrecker and Omega have a completing mission tradition? That is SO cute. - Hooded person is here >>  -- I’m still holding out on my rex or ahsoka predicition because I think it would make sense for the sisters to call them since theyre friends with ahsoka and obviously she knows about clones and Rex is/was with her last we saw him... but the hooded persons eyes definitely aren’t ahsokas so I think it’s rex and if it is Im gonna be so happy - “Thats not her ugly side?” FFF Tech you bastard I love you - I SEE THE WHITE AND BLUE ARMORED ARM IM GONNA SCREAM - I’M SCREAMING -- REX I MISSED YOU SO MUCH I’M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU AGAIN AHHHHH --- I KIND OF POKED FUN AT MYSELF THIS WEEK REBLOGGING A MEME OF A GRANDMA SAYING ‘REX WILL BE IN THE NEXT EPISODE’ AND SOME YOUNGER PERSON EXCORTING THEM AND SAYING SOMETHING LIKE ‘OK GRANDMA LETS GET YOU INSIDE’ OR SOME SHIT BUT **VIOLENTLY POINTING AT THE SCREEN** MY LOVE IS HERE - Cid shut the fuck up he is a KING how dare you - Oh no. Oh god. “thats a long story.” Is he going to talk to him about his pov with 66 and about the ship and Jesse AND FIVES OH FUCK -- So it skipped to Rex talking about the end of the war but we didn’t hear really the story itself, and I really hope thats not all we get when it comes to him talking about the people he and at least echo knew. Like if he talked about Fives learning about the chips and not being listened to and that resulted in 66 because of the chips where activated and made them betray the jedi but we get no reaction from Echo I’m going to be pretty disappointed honestly. Like I get the bad batch not really knowing the squad so they have excuses but Echo did, and I really hope they don’t do the thing “Oh well Echo was caught by droids so now he doesn’t care about them anymore” because... that sucks. Like honestly Echo wasn’t even super crazy about seeing Rex either tbh (I get that Echo feels like he doesn’t fit in with regs and thats all fine and dandy) but it kinda feels like he doesn’t give a shit about what he’s gone through with other people. ---Rambling and getting off topic now because I have some shit between Echo and Fives: but if thats the case like we all know it fucked up Fives when he thought Echo was dead so if Echo isn’t the same way about Fives I guess thats just like... depressing and it sucks because everyone sees them as “that duo”. Again we really don’t know what Rex said exactly so its possible it didnt get brought up but if it did...  - Wrecker picking up Rex is so cute but you can see the fucking worry in Rex’s eyes for being picked up by him cause Wrecker would throw him and agjsdb I love it. - Omega straight up being like “youre old” while looking at Rex’s face PFFT no filter kid. - REX KNOWS ABOUT WRECKER -- Good I’m very happy Rex is calling them out on this inhibitor chip shit. ‘Oh crosshair was just an exception’ should definitely not be an excuse. - Oh alright so the glimpse in the trailer was a junkyard and not the same thing. Same kind of ship but not where the graveyard is. Honestly thats kind of a relief. - OH SHIT I WAS TALKING ABOUT FIVES NOW THEY ARE BRINGING HIM UP IM GONNA CRY ABOUT FIVES ALL OVER AGAIN -- wait.... now I don’t know if they know or not about him. - The scenery in this show is really pretty im just gonna go ahead and give some appreciation. - Oh no Wrecker! Pull up the rope!!!!!! He can climb but you can also pull him!!!! -- Thank god. - Omega talking about if something goes wrong? It’s not like theyre all gonna die at the same exact time.... like theyre only gonna do the surgery one at a time so... Omega what are you imagining sis? Like if one person turns? It’s still kind of unlikely that they could defeat the other very talented people in the room. - OH SHIT TECH YELL FOR HELP - HEY THIS HURTS MY FEELINGS DAVE HEY HEY -- LIKE YEAH THEY CANT POSSIBLY KILL THEM ALL CAUSE THE SHOW NEEDS TO GO ON BUT HEY --- Lowkey predicting they could all turn by the end of the show season cause like if they dont beat wrecker and cant use the medical bay then they are fucked. Also especially think this is gonna happen because one of the directors literally said the second half of season 1 is gonna get emotional and holy shit can you imagine. ---- WHAT IF THEY DO AND ITS JUST OMEGA AND REX TEAMING UP TO SAVE THEM HOLY SHIT AND ITD GIVE EVEN MORE OF A MEANING TO THE WORDS “THE BAD BATCH” - Holy shit this fight Wrecker grabbed ECHO BY HIS FUCKING FACE - Ok I was seriously wondering about Omega’s concerns but now HOLY SHIT CAUSE THATS ALL I CAN SAY LIKE THEYRE NOT DEAD BUT OH MY GOD I DIDN’T THINK ITD GO DOWN LIKE THIS - THANK YOU REX OUR HERO - I know we’re all having a moment after Wrecker but can you guys like team up to move him off the table and get your own done like even if its a bit risky cause we don’t need a repeat of what just happened like yeah theres not enough time in the episode for it but still - The *immediate* little head pat “Hey kid” ;-;

- Ok I’m glad theyre getting them out - THE GENTLE REASSURING TOUCHES IN THIS EPISODE *deep breath* ARE GIVING ME SERATONIN  - Wreckers apology ;-; THIS IS SO FUCKING SAD AND CUTE - Rex is leaving already? :( Be safe you funky little space soldier. - Not really surprised the empire is gonna know they were there cause it was only a matter of time but if theyre smart theyd get off planet and back to Cid before the empire gets there to see whats up.  -- Im sure they’ll realize they removed their chips though, I wonder if crosshair will show up (he probably will) but if he does rather its gonna be a fight there between the empire and bb maybe the bb can win and save crosshair or they have to retreat and something else goes on idk. - Would love if Crosshair was saved because he really got the short end of the stick and is being called “the bad batch” but like he’s not even really there with them for the show so far... also you can tell subtly that he doesn’t like being alone which is fucking sad :tm: because all his friends are gone and it hurts even more now because wrecker was talking about how he didn’t want to do things and he was trying not to hurt them and stuff in his apology and you know damn well Crosshair is the same way about his friends he’s probably just a lot less expressive about it.  -- Honestly even bad batch aside can you imagine how terrible all of the clones feel like all the regs over all knowing theyre the downfall of the jedi and thinking that they were trying to resist it too. Like they know whats happening and deep inside theyre themselves but they cant do shit about it. That fucking hurts me.  This is a longer post but this episode was a roller coaster for my emotions.