#im gen this keeps on happening
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Ships I ship having a week and hmmmmm, want to draw SO BAD em
But also hav other things I should be focusing on in real life
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i think im in too deep w charmander duo. bc i was thinking abt how flame thinks very little abt bans, and how theres a genuine possibility he helps the Guardians ban people not even bc he thinks bans should matter, but just like for fun bc he doesnt think of it that seriously. which led me to thinking "wait but pangi could help him change his mind ^-^" nd now im just thinking of an au where pangi does Just That .
#lifesteal spoilers#charmander duo#pangi#flamefrags#i gen think only losing mane or pangi could help change his perspective tbh#i don't see pangi doing this realistically but that's why its an au :D#bc to me in this au its like worst case scenario of flame banning more than just already banned players#maybe not at the end of s6 but approaching the end#so thats why i think pangi would be more okay banning himself to help flame see things differently#i think hes aware zam and derap seperately will Not let him stay banned too bc zam is zam#and derap would stop at nothing to revive pangi like theyre buddies!!#but he would at least say he wont come back to emphasize how permanent it is and how no matter who is banned#it will matter to at least one person. itll impact SOMEONE. just like pangi is intending for his own life to matter to flame#tho if pangi did ban himself i think itd upset zam and derap a lot ToT#like esp if its for the guy whos been banning other people. even if it does change flame its like#itd feel like a loss nonetheless for the team intent on keeping everyone alive#esp bc its someone derap actually cares abt#sry idk if zam cares abt pangi like that which is why im focusing on cringe and charmanders#LOL#ik empires are a thing but zams way of treating pangi def doesnt show his care tbh#like the only people who actually seem to value pangi on ls is derap and flame#and even they would never choose him first#but they care enough that I think pangi being banned would impact them the most#sorry for angst posting on christmas#it might happen again#later#it depends. im in a Mood.#n e ways! im gonna nap before my social obligations ^-^
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i completely forgot to ever put anything abt him up here please enjoy the dragon master (as seen in missing numbers). weve been struggling to work out his design so bad but we did the last two sketches tonight so ig that's the most up to date for his hair and scars. the first one is the current colors tho
#we've been sketching and working out his design a fair bit to keep it real but we haven't posted it bc-#its spoiler jokes and lore regarding the stuff that made him relevant and me mentally unwell abt him augh#heres some of the raw mn lance process tho yipiee! i wanted to put this up bc im posting smth soon as i didnt want his inclusion to be-#a total curveball lol#pokemon#pokemon lance#champion Lance#dragon master lance#ft one blue. they get brunch together every wednesday (this is canon information to mn)#he has multiple outfits the leather one (doodle with blue) is based on his gen 1 design and is his casual wear :]#his scars will almost certainly continue to shift around until i settle on the details of. what happened to him#😶......
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I'm actually so obsessed with him it's not even funny if i'm not listening to a TikTok or music directly related to him I can't focus free me free me
This is @/cherubpuppet's OC for a object show [au? pitch? wip show? How do I categorize this] and I've been destroyed by the fact that ruler art is infinitely superior [and 10x longer] and i don't have a good enough grasp on lip gloss's personality to make fanfiction so I am frozen in "want make fanart but fanart takes effort :["
#also object shows are the new mlp community change my mind /ref#from what ive seen a very large part of the community is centered around death/gore or mature topics? it reminds me of the mlp infection au#that and smile hd and everybody keeps saying object shiws are kids shows - if kids are making this stuff then good for them /gen#every fandom has its toxic/proship/18+ side obviously but from my pov gen alpha needed something they coudl handle age appropriate extremes#with - its just alot harder to make compelling emotional angst/gore with newer ultra sanitized shows or w/ mascot horror#and like thats a whole nother tooic but its obvious to me younger kids have flocked to mascot horror so harshly because average kids tv is#much more afraid of tackling any big topics to the point that the ones that DO [bluey] immediately are pushed into front and center#but i mean i also rewatched a few episodes of the shows i grew up with and ngl i think we need shit like ren and stimpy and invader zim#i hate ren and stimpy and i didnt grow up with zim but i grew up with pbs kids shit and that shit looking back was hella boring i never#cared for any of the tv shows i saw aside from elmos world and even then i was hoping that something gorey would happen. at like 5 yrs old#im rambling anyway im not sure if im actually going to get into the os communitg but i AM horribly attached to tape to the point that its#maybe possibly becoming harmful to my mental health so im gonna stick around for him for like months#just know that if im not posting anything its because im obsessed with this guy#oh also DID/MALE SA REP LETS FUCKIN GOOO#I LOVE PSYCHOLOGY AND IVE HAD LIKE 4 FRIENDS WITH DID/OSDD I NEED MORE POSITIVE REP OF STIGMATIZED/COMPLEX DISORDERS !!!!!#art#tape dispenser#search for smos#talk talks#EDIT NO. NO DONT SAY IM THE ONLY PERSON ON TUMBLR WHO HAS USED THE SMOS TAG NO. OH MY GOD#PLEASE BEING OBSESSED WITH SOMEONE ELSES OC IS SO GARD DONT LEAVE ME ALONE DO I NEED TO BUILD THIS FANDOM FROM THE GROUND UP??? NOO
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Messes me up that the closest we get to legitimate criticism of the idol business is the stuff that probably happened with Zero, Kujo, and Haruki as well as Takanashi, Yaotome, and Musubi. This isn't to say our current generation of i7 doesn't give us entertainment industry criticism (it obviously does), but I mean to say that, personally, the conversation between Torao and Ryu about Ryu's image was a horror story to me personally. Like, I can extrapolate the sincerity and heartwarmingness of surviving a terrible world because you have loved ones who see you for who you are AND be horrified by his acceptance of being sexualised by the media because he's an idol, right?
#i do not Enjoy giving critique to medias i enjoy#well i do but i dont post it because i have other areas where i discuss criticism and current events#make this blog escapist at its best or something#HOWEVER....i7 has unleashed the obsession in me in a way that me more confident on tumblr...#...is going feral with#idolish7#fandom spamdom#note's notes#to clarify i also think that the whole zero revolutionised the industry means that things are Better than irl#but i also do find such things horrifying#something about tenn as an allegory for what happens if you sell yourself to the fans#just horrifying stuff right there#makes me realise that if this were a female idol media...they could keep things exactly like so#but somehow the tone would be slightly darker given what irl female idols/women in gen seem to experience#....not idol media extrapolating the discourse out of me#im so sorry....and yet i post.
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I want to play minecraft <- instead has played 5 hours of the sims 4 and has something important to do tomorrow
#>:[#waddahell im too busy playing the sims 4 so i cant play minecraft whatttt#where my free time <- spent it all playing sims 4#to be fair i am also trying to get a job. so.#no ive hit a sims 4 hyperfixATION and this is my life for the next like. month#ive never gotten this far into the game before#i only have 2 households i have a gen household which has expanded a LOT#and one where i made the minecraft default skins#except there wasnt enough room for Noor and i cant get the expand families thing to work#so theyre on their own next door lmao#but the game keeps messing them up its ANNOYING#anyway i didnt make that house to play with i just made it to be friends with my main house#i accidentally aged up my child into a teenager so now im going to adopt a new one so i can play through childhood#um but i realised that my hyperfixation on sims 4 comes from the same place and my fixation on cities skylines#- dream fuffilment - creative control and outlet - puzzle mindset -#- stories -#which means that ive got about a month left of this fixation because the games are quite similar#last time i stopped playing cities skylines was bc i hit a slight wall and got frustrated at the game for being so paywalled behind expansio#n packs#boy i wonder whats gonna happen to me#am I:#A. going to continue playing this game sustainably and indefinatly forever without my love for it wavering#or B. hyperfixate on something else next week
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let a post about and celebrating gen fic just be about and celebrating gen fic without derailing it to be about ship fic actually challenge
#EXPERT LEVEL DIFFICULTY APPARENTLY#gav gab#im being a bitch about this but im so fucking tired and this keeps happening#not even posts directly and exclusively about gen fic get to be about gen fic#even other aros will not let me live on this one#staples a sign to my face that says I AM A ROMANCE REPULSED AROMANTIC DO NOT MAKE MY POSTS ABOUT SHIP FIC
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rewatching gen v one more time because i’m mentally ill and can’t focus on anything else
#and then maybe#when im finished i’ll go rewatch the boys again#and be stuck in this cycle#forever#gen v#the boys#i miss tv shows with 22+ episodes so much#its so hard for me to move on from things#i was literally the most annoying person in the world when hotd was airing bc the only thing on my mind was rhaenicent#but its also very hard to keep me interested in tv shows when they’re not airing#so….. lets see what happens
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the death of art the death of education the death of childhood the death of narrative the birth of christ as we believed he was a zombie and our father
#talks#anyway im having some sort of reaction to seeing a lot of people discussing the collective trauma of gen z#as it correlates to nostalgia for corporate products and the exploitation of children#i feel odd being in this position as i feel like ive already emotionally unpacked this with introspection of my own childhood experiences#and current day struggles with parental abuse & emotional neglect#but what im mostly scared of is the idea that people will refuse to reclaim what once brought them joy through a dark period#as well as a loss of hope that im starting to see manifest in real life and on social media#the last thing id want is for people to give up on art because of what they fear may happen if they do#if somebody gets hurt because of it#keep it in your mind that hollywood was built on voyerism and exploitation#(aside—please read laura mulvey’s visual pleasure & narrative cinema)#(and bell hooks oppositional gaze)#but personally im not waiting on any internship applications so I can one day make it to LA and maybe get my cartoon produced#with 500 pages of censorship notes from S&P#im making my cartoon now because ive worked hard to get here and i have the resources to do it#it will be free for everybody to watch on youtube. i just want people to see it and have a good time with it#also i might just be wiccan now
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girl...did u see what bobby said about hanbin -_-
i sure did....
#++#ask#i have many things to say and NONE are kind!!#like SIR ur never been good w words what the hell did u think would happen?!?!?!#the biggest let down was him calling him “a bad example for future gen” over some weed... ok mr out of wedlock pregnancy like since when di#u have such traditional values?!??#thats just the very tip of the icebearg but im trying to keep it civil idk lmk if u want to hear my full rant!
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and suddenly i find myself on an unquenchable quest for knowledge (guy who’s been spending hours reading k-idol info pages)
#fishy’s bubbles#insofar i’ve been a ‘oh i just listen to music’ k music enjoyer/fan#like fr. if it gives it vibes idk what you want from me#but now. now i just want to make connections n know faces n ages n debuts n friendships n activity#ig i did drop off on keeping up on my multi-idol/group enjoying so now i wanna know what’s happened since i dropped off#(i dropped off rounds about the tail end of gen 3/3.5 and now we’re a good bit into gen 4 but all im wanting to do is pick back up#n see how my prev loves r doing. it’s funny too bc for the most part i’m not even consciously aware of how certain groups/names are ‘iconic’#[iconic to me at least- wherein ik them n they’re still popping up here n there]#like i’m p sure i was just listening to bts in 2018#*looks suspiciously at 2017* hmmmmmm why do i think TOPDOGG (or UP10TION) has done a dance video for one of their songs using heeley’s#in a school gym)#anyway it is. so late. The Fruits would be so disappointed in me for how late i am sleeping (i’m so proud they sleep reasonably <3)
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#how long can i keep my impulse control in tact before i cave and buy winds of anthos lmao#i have successfully staved off minekos night market but only becuase the reviews have leaned majorly towards bad#i will probably buy it if it ever gets very discounted lol but.....eeegh#a Shame bc i was really looking forward to it lol#woa is like.....a lot of the reviews are good with caveats#but currently i am Bored and when i am Bored my impulse control leaves with its bindle#also like. its monday. im too tired to find another way to tackle my Bored#buying a game and playing it is very easy#I've been thinking about replaying legends arceus but i cannot predict if i will get bored immediately bc ive already played it lol 😶🌫️#I literally do not have the attention span for games but i like games#like if i get bored of a game before i finish it thats the end i will never play it again lmao#paleo pines for example....i opened ariacotta canyon and then immediately my interest in the game died#faefarm also..... opened the volcano area and immediately got bored of the gameplay loop#don't even know what happened to Ryza 2 i just stopped playing and could never go back again lmao#all my attention span is relying on the scarvi dlc which probably wont be out until at least November 😶🌫️😶🌫️#and the hypothetical gen 5 remakes which could easily end up being shit 😭#aaaaaaaaaaa#i need more hobbies babes
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every day I find out about another nickelodeon star turned pop star against my will
#the generational divide between gen z and millenial is actually whether or not you knew olivia rodrigo was in disney shit or whatever#before quinton reviews mentioned it in a recent video#i also didnt know ariana grande came from nickelodeon before jennette mccurdys book was coming out bc i never watched victorious#inb4 anyone says 'but youre only 24' im actually 65 i just happened to have been born in 99 ok#seriously tho how do all of these random ass pop starts keep appearing and everyone seems to know about them but me akdbsksbskdh
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checked in on my tama after leaving it for only 2-ish hours and i got the spaceship ending wtfff😭😭😭😭 it was only like 3 years old too i'm so upset
#went on tama reddit and apparently this just sometimes happens with gen 2's???#i did care for it regularly and tried to keep its hearts at at least 2 for both hunger and happiness even tho it wasnt very disciplined...#im sorry i didnt treat you right 😭😭😭😭 i'll be a better father to this next egg i promise 💪🏿
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the world NEEDS to see my boobs
#i keep buying shitty bras that. dont work as bras. or at least not most of the time.#i buy them for like 5 bucks at a cheap has-everything store etc bc im gross with them. and i keep being surprised that they suck.#like. omg nvm i dont even want to talk about ittt#and so they fucking KEEP. popping out.#and im at work i cant just. grab at my boobs. BUT I HAVE TO.#im all for free the nipple. im all for no-bra. just give me a choice to NOT do those cmon mannnn#sillyposting#anyway in unrelated news (/gen) ive been really dysphoriccc =w=bbbb#mom called me a girlypop once to often (2 times) and immm :))#ok not really girlypop but. yaknow equivalant term whatevs.#and then my brother called and then i got 'girl'd at work (WHERE I USE MY MASC NAME)#and i know. i know. that its not their fault. i am right to be upset nontheless.#and all of it is casual. theres not an intent behind it. and to be fair it. i feel like such a visible tranny they need to know right??#like my brother has. a right to be wrong i guess.#actually nvm im just making excuses for behavior i feel bad about.#and i have the right to get upset about this. its good and reaffirms that im trans. it just sucks#if i want the words they say to change i have to announce that boundary. and that is the thing that is not even close to going to happen
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I love getting hate anons talking abt how I'm ruining America when I've literally stated multiple times I'm not American. Like brother do you are have stupid
#I won't b posting the ask bcuz it's bad lmao#it's just fascinating to me like. what part of my blog gives u the impression I'm American#I've said repeatedly I'm not American and don't live there. never have. I post abt Not America and my Not American problems all the time.#if ur sending me hate asks im gonna assume you've been to my blog at least once. surely you've seen that. and if not. why would u Assume-#-everyone online is American#like do I need to put a disclaimer in my bio? WARNING: IM NOT AMERICAN so ppl get the hint??? this keeps happening#again. I'm genuinely not bothered by the ask it is simply baffling to me /gen#armchair speaks
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