#im better at getting up than i am at going down. which is funny to me

[hearty-an0n]

just finished my first practice!! my feet hurt it gets so hot why. does my chin get sweaty. i dont appreciate that

[azzibuckets]

letters from dallas part 1

paige bueckers x azzi fudd

a/n: in which i neglect all the other series and fics im supposed to be writing to send more angst ur way <3

lfd masterlist | main masterlist

May 1, 2025

Dear Azzi,

It fucking sucks here.

I know I’m supposed to be thankful for this opportunity. And I am, I swear. My teammates are nice. Arike’s been showing me around downtown. Nai and Lyss are funny. They’ve adopted me, called me their child. They remind me of us.

My therapist said it’s good to write down my feelings. Not sure how she’d say if it was letters, letters to you, but hey, something is better than nothing.

I saw a trailer for Frozen 3 last week and I thought of you. I hope you’re doing well. I called KK the other day. She was so excited - I felt bad. I haven’t been as good as I wanted to be with talking to our team - well, your team now - but it hurts too much knowing that they get to spend every day with you and I can’t. I asked her about you. She seemed hesitant to tell me. But I kept nagging her and she told me you’re good, spending a lot of time reading and stuff. Said they finally got you off Colleen Hoover. She wants me to move on, I can tell. It’s killing both of us, how I can’t let you go. But I guess writing these letters and stuffing them in my closet are how I’m trying to get my closure and deal with my feelings, so maybe this will help.

You’re on my fucking mind all the time, and I wish you weren’t. I miss you so bad sometimes it hurts to exist. If you saw the amount of melatonin I take every every night just to avoid you in my dreams, you’d probably yell at me.

Love,

Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

June 7, 2025

Dear Azzi,

Have I mentioned that Drew hasn’t been talking to me? He blames me for our breakup, and he misses you like hell. I do too.

I played like shit in the game yesterday. I can’t believe we lost to the Sparks. It was nice seeing Cam again though. I don’t know if you remember, but it’s our anniversary. I saw that you were at the soccer game with the girls. You looked really good, really happy. I guess it doesn’t affect you like it affects me. And I know that should make me like, mad, or jealous. But I’m glad at least one of us is healing?

Honestly? it sucks having to see your face all over social media. It sucks even more whenever I go on my Instagram page and you’re all over it too. I could be salty and delete all of it, but that would start too much drama. Besides, that would mean deleting like half my posts

I wonder how Jose and Jon are doing. Jon unfollowed me the other day. That one hurt pretty bad. I miss my little brothers, and I miss your parents.

Love,

Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

August 28, 2025

Dear Azzi,

Yesterday was a fucking shit show. Honestly, I didn’t expect you to even show up when I heard you guys were coming. It was weird, seeing you in the audience. It was everything I’d always imagined, you coming to my games, but it also made me feel sick, knowing this is what could’ve been. What should’ve been. I was nervous the last quarter thinking about what to say to you after the game, but god, Azzi, you couldn’t even look at me. I tried to talk to you after the group pic but you disappeared.

Maybe it’s a good time to tell you that Katie and Tim were at my game last week, against the Mystics. I’m gonna be honest, when I saw they were there, I avoided them, and I’m not proud of it. I ran to my car straight after the presser but somehow they found where I parked and were waiting next to it?? If this was a different circumstance I would’ve laughed.

All they told me was great game before I started crying. I don’t even know what came over me. But your mom hugged me and that made me cry even harder. They told me I was their daughter no matter what, and they loved me. I wrote it down as soon as I left because I didn’t ever wanna forget.

Azzi, we didn’t even marry each other like we promised, and I still feel like we left a broken family. I didn’t mean for this many people to get hurt, for this many relationships to shatter because ours did.

It makes forgetting you so much harder, and that’s what pisses me off. That I’ve injured my knee and gone through months of rehab and moved across the country to a brand new city, yet this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

From,

Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 2nd, 2025

Dear Azzi,

I was calling KK again and I didn’t ask about you this time. I think I’m making some progress.

Arike keeps trying to get me with some of her friends, but it still doesn’t feel right. I think I need a little bit more time.

From,

Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 20, 2025

Dear Azzi,

I turn 24 today. Damn I feel old. I’ve spent a third of my life now loving you.

From,

Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 22nd, 2025

Dear Azzi,

I just got your present in the mail. You didn’t have to. I love it. Thank you.

- Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

November 11, 2025

Happy birthday big head. I think you probably received my gift by now. I debated on writing a card, but you didn’t write me one, and I’ve decided to leave the cards (haha) in your hand. So I’m just following your lead. I hope you enjoy 23.

- Paige

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

December 7, 2025

Azzi,

Hell of a game yesterday. Proud of you. National player of the year performance

- P

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

April 5, 2026

Az,

LET’S FUCKING GOOOO. Shit, man. Two peat natty champs??? Unbelievable. My hands are tweaking out, I can’t even read my own handwriting. I knew you could do it, Az. Thank you for not forcing me to wear irish merch..I never look good in green like you do

- P

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

April 13, 2026

Azzi,

Drafted to the Sky????

See you so fucking soon

Nice fit at the draft btw

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

May 16, 2026

Dear Azzi,

Fuck, the way you smiled at me after that game. Maybe I’ll have the courage to finally text you. I know it’s probably not the best idea but…I still regret everything. It’s been a little bit more than a year and it still hurts as bad as it did the first day. Is this normal?

Love,

Paige

[valiantothello]

Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying, Chapter 2: Roots

Its moments like this that show me how Dick is truly so much better than me. If a random kid walked up to me and said that about my father who just decked me in the face and told me to not come back, I'd get violent 😭.

And the funny thing is, we as the reader know that Dick has been "paying back" what he "owes" Bruce, as Tim says it. Batman Year Three shows Dick going to talk to Bruce after talking with his therapist *post-New Titans #53 in the hopes of settling the issues between them.

"DON'T YOU DARE BLAME ME FOR JASON'S DEATH!"

*New titans #53

Never say Dick doesn't go to therapy, guys

This all happens relatively close to each other, timeline wise. I'm pretty sure it's Dick; finds out Jason is dead, goes to Bruce, gets punched, leaves, has a Titans meeting and fires Danny Chase because he cant stomach mentoring someone so young anymore, goes to his therapist then goes to talk to Bruce again. Bruce isn't left to his own devices for very long, is what I'm trying to say. For even more reference, Jason dies in Batman #429: A Death in the Family and Dick comes back for his second talk with Bruce in Batman #436: Batman Year Three.

"BRUCE? BRUCE, WE'VE GOT TO-" "IT'S ALFRED, SIR. MASTER BRUCE IS GONE." "HE HAD TO KNOW I WANTED TO SPEAK WITH HIM, SO HE RAN BEFORE WE HAD OUR CONFRONTATION. ALFRED, I'M DEFINITELY FEELING YOU'RE RIGHT. SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH HIM, AND HE'S AVOIDING THE VERY PEOPLE WHO COULD TRY TO HELP HIM." "OUR CONVERSATIONS HAVE BEEN MINIMAL AT BEST-- --AND ONLY WHEN I AM TENDING TO HIS WOUNDS... WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING BEFORE-- WHICH ARE MORE FREQUENT THAN I HAVE EVER SEEN BEFORE." "THE TITANS BEEPER. HOLD A SEC."

Batman #437: Batman Year Three

He goes to find Bruce but ends up finding out how much excessive force Bruce is using on his opponents. It's so bad that Dick has to call an ambulance for a guy Bruce left behind on his rampage.

"HE KEPT SHOUTIN AT US--WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT THE GANG KILLINGS."

"WANTED TO KNOW WHAT WAS GOING DOWN THE GRAPEVINE" "I HEARD A RUMOR--NOTHIN' MORE. I SWEAR IT 'BOUT RICKY ROSSELLI... I TOLD BATMAN WHAT I HEARD." "BUT HE DIDN'T BELIEVE 'IM. HE KEPT HITTIN' JACKY TILL JACKY COULDN'T TALK NO MORE." "I'M CALLING FOR AN AMBULANCE. WHEN I'M DONE, I WANT YOU TO TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU TOLD BATMAN." 'What's HAPPENED to you, Bruce? what's going on?'

Batman #437: Batman Year Three

He ends up finding Bruce, only to get shrugged off. They play a game of cat and mouse: Dick chasing after Bruce, trying to get him to open up to him and Bruce running away from facing both his feelings AND Dick.

"WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO OPEN UP, BRUCE? YOU CAME SO CLOSE. WHY DID YOU SHUT DOWN ALL OVER AGAIN?"

Batman #437: Batman Year Three

Essentially, Dick takes up the brunt of the emotional labour in this book but Bruce is not allowing Dick to help. He says this when confronted by Dick about it:

Batman #437: Batman Year Three

"WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

"I HAVE SOME THEORIES I WANT TO CHECK OUT." "THEN I'M COMING WITH YOU." "NO! I DON'T NEED ANY PARTNERS."

The crux of the problem that Tim just doesn't get is that it's not about Dick not being Robin. Dick has been attempting to connect with Bruce, despite what he's done to him. The problem is Bruce rejecting partnership of any kind. He is pushing Alfred away, he is pushing Dick away. He cannot stomach the idea of a team anymore.

My point circles back to the idea of Dick owing something to Bruce. Dick owes Bruce nothing that he hasn't paid for in the form of years of loyalty, love and forgiveness. He will help Bruce time and time again and now the idea of debt is being thrown in his face and its like?? I think Tim saying that highlights how out the loop he really is on the Dick-Bruce relationship, despite everything he finds out, he has only gleamed the surface.

This was supposed to be a funny shitpost and it became meta oh ok 👍

[alexa-yukiyu]

Just imagining cat child being a zoan cat type she loves napping in the sun(or cuddling against ace or marco) she would rather die than admit that she loves head pats.

When the crew gets to rowdy she just goes to nap next to pops.

Whenever they run into trouble on islands Ace is grinning before letting yn go and attack, because she's so tiny. She just bites the ankles

I think she'd get the nickname "ankle bitter"

Apawling Cattitude (Whitebeard pirates x f!Cat!child Reader)

A/N See what I did there 🐈 im so funny and goofy, anyhow I COOKED HERE, just pure cooked down below, especially on that ankle biter part 😎

Here Reader is replaced by Dokucha as place holder which stands for reader in japanese

Dividers by @/saradika

“Brother Marco, are you done yet?” the young child groans, lounging in one of his examining tables

“Not yet; there are still a few things I need to finish up,” Marco responds without even turning his head around

“I’m cold,” she whines

“There’s a storm outside, so I can’t warm up in the sun, and Ace fell asleep while eating again; you're the only source of heat around.”

He sighs, turning around on his chair and picking up the child from the table, putting them on his lap, and turning back around to his paper

“There, now will you let me finish these papers?”

She smiles, cuddling up to him and closing her eyes, basking in warmth

“You’re so warm, Brother Marco.”

“Yes, yes, I know, but you aren’t making my job easier.” He says as he works on finishing his papers, his actions betraying his words as he begins petting her head, scratching behind her ears

She hums, letting a loud purring sound at the sensation, leaning closer to him

He lets out a snicker at the sound

“Why are you laughing?” She mumbles

“Nothing.” He mumbles before continuing to scratch behind her ears

“I just remembered a conversation in which you said you did not fold at being petted,” he said with a chuckle

“Ten minutes ago, to be specific, if I am not mistaken.”

She jumps up at that, a frown on her young face

“I’ll have you know you are mistaken! I do not fold at something such as pets; I am not some stray cat!”

He raises his eyebrow

“Then, could you explain the purring I heard just a moment ago?”

“Yeah, you need to get your hearing checked.”

“Did you forget about my devil fruit?”

“Must be malfunctioning 'cause there is something wrong with em.”

“You’re such a brat; just admit you enjoy being petted.”

“Hmph,” she scoffed, jumping off his lap

“I'm going to go see if Brother Ace woke up; maybe his ears will be working better than yours, Brother Marco.”

He smiles, watching the child go, leaning his head on his hand

“Do come back if you want more,” he calls out

“Shut up!”

He snickers under his breath but says nothing else as she storms off

Tiny footsteps could be heard hitting against the boards of the Moby dick as Dokucha hurriedly made it to the mess hall, looking for her freckled brother, spotting the rambunctious man over in one of the tables

“Brother Ace, you’re up!” She hollered

Ace, sitting down in one of the tables with the rest of the brothers, quickly wolfs down his food at the sound of the voice

“What’s up?” He asks as he sees his sister approaching, raising an eyebrow

She stretches her hands towards him, opening and closing her hands

He chuckles at the motion before grabbing her and picking her up, placing her on his lap

“What is it, kitty cat?” He teases

“Nothing,” she smiles, cuddling up to him and his heightened warmth

“Sure.” He chuckles, rubbing her ears gently as they are on his hands

“Then why the sudden rush to see me?”

“Brother Marco was being mean, and I was cold,” she mumbles

He chuckles at the small girls voice

“Oh was he? You mean your kitty purr didn’t work on him?”

“I don’t purr!” She said once again, jumping up, glaring at him

“Hah, really?!” he gasps in fake surprise

“Could have sworn I heard it, din’t you, Thatch?” he asked with a grin, looking at his brother, who was putting some plates down on the table

Thatch chuckles, shaking his head with a grin

“I did hear a small purr, yes.”

She pouts about to tell them off when one of the tables when up in an uproar; by the look of it, one of her brothers had started a drinking competition once again

She sighed, jumping off Ace’s lap and continuing on her way to find a place to nap in peace

Whitebeard hums as he hears soft knocking at the door of his chambers

“Come in.”

“Papaw!” She whines, climbing her way into his bed

He chuckles as she climbs all over his bed

“Gurararara” he laughs scratching her head.

“What is it? Is there something you need?”

“Mess hall is too noisy; I wanna nap,” she said, cuddling into his chest with a smile, sighing in relief

“There,There .” He said strokinb her hair as she cuddles into his chest, his own soft smile growing as he looks down at his little one

“Sleep here for now, brats know to keep it down around here”

“Thank you, Papaw”

“Make sure to sleep well.”

Dokucha now sat on top of ace’s shoulders, leaning her face and hands on top of his head as they walked

“What are we looking for again?”

“Izou left ahead of us to intercept the guys we were after; we are his backup,” he answered as he briskly walked through the grassy field

“I see him. Okay, ankle biter, you’re up,” he said, grabbing the girl from his shoulders and putting her on the ground, kneeling down on the ground next to her

“See the guy with the red shirt? He’s a long-distance sniper; I need you to take him out while I go help Izou with the melee fighters.”

She grins, her two incisors poking out of her mouth as she did

“Bite?” she said, looking at her brother, waiting for permission

“Yes, you can bite; go get ’em.”

She grins, shifting into her cat form and running closer to the guy; once close enough, she began prowling, silently approaching the guy until she was right next to them, at which point she pounced on them, making quick work of them, removing their going and easily gaining a surrender

She shifted into her human form, grinning as she kneeled on the now fainted man, chuckling as she watched her brothers make quick work of the rest of the enemies

“Impressive.” Izou praised her, approaching the girl, Ace following behind him, looking down at the man she had incapacitated.

“You’re getting better at that,” he grins, rubbing her head

She gives him a toothy grin in response, purring at the affection

As a reward for her hard work, Izou decided not to comment on the very obvious purring coming out from her as he continued rubbing her head , her ears tilting and twitching as she enjoyed her hard-earned pampering

That scene where Dokucha was kneeling on top of the guy, I was thinking of that one scene where young shanks was doing the same, eating chocolate (?)

Shanks really be stealing hearts since back then, I ‘ll take 1000 chapters on Roger pirates, Thank you < 3

Taglist:

@imaginarydreams

@amethystviolin

@h0n3y-l3m0n05

[pinkaditty]

Who's Passing NNN? Tokyo Debunker Pt 5

hey man. the world keeps turning and i keep waking up. im grateful!

a/n: sorry i didn't update this series all weekend i mysteriously got sick with nausea and terrible headaches so i stayed away from my laptop most of the time. also please join me in prayer for an election recount. amen! anyways. enjoy haku and the others jacking it! quick disclaimer that i write these under the assumption the tokyo debunker boys are at least 18 years old. they appear to be present at a university considering there are professors and a chancellor. not to mention the boys drink, smoke, gamble, and refer to themselves as adults.

summary: pt 5 of the "Who's Passing NNN?" Tokyo Debunker series. i am genuinely surprised y'all like these but hey! i enjoy writing them which makes it so much better!

cw: men pulling their dicks out to rub them!!!!!! MINORS DNI AS PER USUAL!!!!!!!!!!!! again... not proofread.

Frostheim || Vagastrom || Jabberwock || Sinostra || Hotarubi || Obscuary || Mortkranken

(obscuary next... halfway through with them. enjoy!)

Hotarubi: 

Subaru Kagami: Pass

Honestly struggled with him a little bit because of how funny it would be if he failed and writing him in a situation where he had to hold it together, but then I realized I already did that (see “He Knows”). I love tormenting submissive men but I’m gonna give him a lil break. 

He’s hard as a rock. His cock harshly presses into his pants, seeking friction and begging to be set free. Subaru, however, remains the picture of elegance - if you ignore his flushed cheeks and trembling silhouette. He was sitting alone in the hidden Hotarubi cabin, waiting to meet Haku later. He held a hot cup of tea in front of him, trying not to spill it as he slowly lifts it to his lips. He manages to gently sip at it, his fingers slipping just slightly and spilling just a little over the edges. The tea slides from his lips, past his chin, and down his neck, lightly staining the collar of his shirt. He sighs in frustration and hooks a finger over his collar, pulling it away from the tea. He only just now realizes how warm he felt, the exposure of his heated skin to cooler air giving him goosebumps. He suppresses a gasp at the feeling and readjusts his collar, placing his tea down with his other hand. Now that he was aware of the heat, it wouldn’t leave him alone. It seemed to flood his body from head to toe - flushed cheeks and neck, his body tense with heat and arousal, his blood flowing to his shameful erection. 

He wondered if he should cancel on Haku, and nearly immediately regrets the thought. That would potentially make things inconvenient for him, and he didn’t want that… But he also knew he wouldn’t be much for conversation like this. Not to mention it would be absolutely mortifying if Haku saw right through him. Subaru sighs, though it sounds more like a pleasured groan. This was a terrible predicament.

He gets a notification on his phone. Something from Wickchat. With trembling hands, he opens the message. It’s from Haku. He’s running late. 

Subaru sighs. He wasn’t sure how he was going to get through the next half hour waiting for Haku like this. Technically, he could take care of it, here… There was no one around, the rain would muffle any noise, and it’s not like this cabin is clearly visible through the trees. He whips his head around the empty cabin, as though someone would be hiding in the corners. His flush grows deeper at the thought of doing this somewhere other than his dorm, but he can’t deny the way his cock jumps at the thought of getting away with it. With his lips pressed into a thin, trembling line - he reaches for his pants, squeezing himself through the fabric. He whines, the sound more needy than intended. He slaps a hand to his mouth, going silent for a moment, his eyes darting to the windows of the small space. When he decides he’s safe, he does it again -- squeezing himself gently, trying to relieve some pressure. It isn’t long before he’s gently rubbing his palm against his tip, teasing himself. He keeps his hand clasped tight to his mouth, muffled moans and whimpers slipping through. He gently teases the head, slowly dragging his fingers up and down his shaft. He rubs his thighs together and leans forward, realizing his peak is rapidly approaching. He rips his hand from his mouth and swiftly grabs a handkerchief, pointing his cock at that as he finally bursts, a strangled moan lifting from his throat and his cum spurting onto the thin fabric. He shivers, staring at the mess, wondering if brewing another cup of tea would get the scent of his arousal out of the air. 

Haku Kusanagi: Fail

Come on. Let’s be for real. He did not try. Caught wind of the bet between Romeo and Rui and just laughed. He is not passing this shit, and he knows it. As much as I would love to write Haku getting off… I’ll make him suffer one more time.

Haku shivers, the air just a tad bit chilly on the galaxy express. Usually, these rides were quick, but unfortunately, his mission had been quite a ways away. He could expect to be here for a while. He chews on his thumbnail, tapping his foot as though to speed up time. He drums his fingers on the plush seat next to him, doing anything to distract himself and pass the time. He was good at hiding his arousal, typically, and that hadn’t changed today. But, for whatever reason, every single sensation felt more potent today. The chill of the air on his face, the slide of his shirt and collar along his chest and neck, the rush of warmth following every twitch of his impatient length - it all felt the same. Stimulating. He found himself having to blink multiple times or gently shake his head to prevent himself from getting lost in sensation after sensation. 

He sighs and leans his head back, listening intently to the gentle thrum of the hearth of the train as it smoothly coasted through the unseen anomalous pockets of space. He was glad this train didn’t rumble or thump, because if it did, it would’ve caused him more than enough friction to lose himself far quicker. 

He shifts his gaze to his half-hard cock as it continues to rise insistently. He groans inwardly, his expression twisting into a displeased look. Heat flushes through him as his cock twitches, as though noticing his attention. He sighs miserably, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was not going to jack off on this train. He’d have to wait. He was supposed to be meeting Subaru when he got back, but he really didn’t feel like showing up with an obvious boner. He’d simply have to be late, not that this boner was giving him much choice. He couldn’t even shift his attention away from it. The flush creeping up his skin made the cool air of the train that much more potent. The sweat beading from his chest makes his shirt stick to him, brushing against him more directly. His unhurried, labored breaths only quickened with every twitch. He could feel his mind clouding, slowly succumbing to the pleasant sensations, and small, soft moans escaping his lips. He keens once, feeling his cock reach full mast and form a tent, desperate as he was for release. He shakes his head, gritting his teeth and curling his hands into fists. He was not going to jack off on this train. 

He sits back upright, panting, certain his bangs were sticking to his forehead. Finally, the train makes an announcement. “Now arriving at Darwick Academy…” Haku sighs with relief, beyond ready to march back to his dorm room. He’s on his feet before the train even stops, driven blind by a need for release. He squeezes his thighs together, waiting at the door for the train to stop, shakily texting Subaru that he’d be late. 

Zenji Kotodama: Pass (Unintentionally)

He didn’t even realize it was NNN, man. To him, it was purposely abstaining from it to fuel his inspiration. Like hunger and thirst, certain sensations do go away or are dulled when you die, but intense emotions remain… desire being one of them. 

It’s harder than you’d think for a ghost to find some alone time. He’d finally finished composing his newest tune to play on his biwa, and wanted nothing more than to retreat to his own world. His newest tune had been about desire, something he felt so frequently as a ghost. A desire to live, a desire to be, a desire to connect with those around him. He also felt himself longing for physical pleasures, too. He can touch anything he wants… so long as it isn’t a living person. He just passes right through them. Thankfully, his dormmates that could see him do opt to pretend he can, but he wants to feel. He wants to touch. He wants to connect. 

Unfortunately, until that day dawned, he’d have to settle for himself, his beloved doll, and everything else. 

He’d left both the doll and his biwa out on one of Hotarubi’s may balconies, to watch the rain and the koi fish swimming in the ponds. Since Subaru knew he was “here”, he’d graciously allowed Zenji to keep a room, which he hardly uses, but is grateful for anyway. It is here that he retreats, letting the desire to touch brew into a boil. He grunts, dissatisfied, as he stalks to his bed, plopping his back onto the pillowy sheets. He groans, sinking into the bed. Despite his complicated mix of emotions, he still feels his arousal stir, feeling himself swell with the desire to touch, or be touched. He presses his lips into a thin line, welcoming the warmth as it swallows him whole. His cheeks flush and soft moans escape his lips as he imagines how it must feel; hands gently caressing his body, starting with his cheeks, then moving to his neck, gently trailing their nails across his sensitive skin, splaying their fingers wide on his chest, pressing them down hard as they pass over his nipples, moving lower, and lower, and lower… Zenji finds himself arcing into the imaginary touch, his dick twitching as though it were real. He shivers, following the insistent demand of his lower body and letting his hands trail further down his own body, hooking his thumb over his pants and tugging them down.

It isn’t long before he’s stroking his length, his desire taking hold of him completely. He throws his head back on the bed as he gently strokes himself, imagining someone else is teasing his length, taking slower strokes until they are satisfied. Zenji groans and begins thrusting into his hand, curling it tighter around his shaft. He traces his body with his other hand, touching and teasing all the places he’d like to be touched. He moans in tandem with each touch and thrust into his hand, feeling his peak reach him rapidly. He curls his free hand into his shirt as he cums, spurting his mess onto his hand and thighs. He turns his gaze down to his hand as he gently squeezes the last few drops out of himself. He’d have to keep settling for this.

a/n: caught my ass genuinely drooling as i was writing haku's part man im cooked. like!!! haku!! come to the old chapel... i'll totally give u head brew u some tea!!!! (tbh either way works he's so cute i just wanna spend time with him)

siiiiighhh anyways note that i appreciate likes, comments, and reblogs!!!! please tell me how much you enjoyed this! it means a lot to know you guys like my writing!

[coeurify]

I have no idea how this would fit into an storyline but I am a hoe for fake dating. Imagine fake dating with abby and it slowly becoming too real

UGH YOU GET ME FAKE DATING IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES!!

⋆˚✿˖° now, abby anderson had a problem. specifically a blonde, brown eyed loud mouthed man of a problem. owen fucking moore. she had broken up with him in the summer time, little explanation given to the ass of a boyfriend other than that she needed to “find herself.” (not that she needed to give any.)

⋆˚✿˖° but owen? oh owen didn’t accept that. so from the very moment abby had broken it off, to when the air began to smell like fall.. he pestered abby. asked for a reason, begged for another chance (despite HIM going around with damn near every girl on the WLF compound.)

⋆˚✿˖° things came to a head at a get together in one of abby and owen’s mutual friend’s apartment style quarters. mutual friend who also happened to be your roommate.

⋆˚✿˖° abby and owen fought all night, abby’s cheeks red from embarrassment and anger, eyebrows furrowed together. “why can’t you just take no for an answer owen?“ the cup in her hand crackled a bit under the pressure when the man scoffed. “because you never give me a real answer!” abby’s arms crossed at that, searching around the room. quickly, and maybe a little impulsively, she shrugged. “i’m into someone else now.”

⋆˚✿˖° owen just couldn’t accept that, his arms thrown around dramatically. “so you like another guy? that’s why you wont give me another chance? you know i can treat you better.” that sentence alone reminded abby just why she hated being with him so much, but again that fast moving brain of hers spoke before the thought could finish, finger pointing in the direction of the first person she found.. you. “it’s not a guy. it’s a girl. im not.. into your..” abby made a motion, “species anymore.” sure, it was sort of true. abby recently realized she probably had a thing for girls, but you particularly? she couldn’t count on her fingers the amount of conversations she had with. “i like her.”

⋆˚✿˖° you, who’s head poked up, mouth full of slightly stale chips, having heard the whole conversation. abby anderson, beautiful, funny, madeyouweakintheknees, abby anderson was into you? and not straight? surely not. you swallowed harshly, deciding to play into whatever game abby seemed to have set on the floor. you made your way over, an award winning smile on your face as owen’s mouth dropped open further than a damn infected. “You like her? as in girls?”

⋆˚✿˖° honestly, you probably caused more trouble when you stood near the two, “abs!” you grinned, “you forgot your jacket here.. cmere ill grab it for you.” and then your hand is wrapped around her tensed bicep, the stiffness likely caused by her pure shock you even played along. still, she used it as an out from the devil with blonde locks, shrugging almost apologetically at owen before letting you whisk her away.

⋆˚✿˖° and that night, after everyone but you and abby had stumbled out of the cramped room, which was still humid and heavy, you made the plan. with a pen that had little ink left, scratching against the water damaged pages of the notebook you tucked under your pillow, you wrote the words “project get rid of owen moore.” which ok, in retrospect sounded really bad. but you were a little tipsy.

⋆˚✿˖° the plan was easy. play the role of abby’s first girlfriend, convince owen she was totally not into him or men anymore. what did you get out of it? a spot on the top dog abby anderson’s patrol team. something you had been vying for this year. abby agreed, although a little hesitantly. she promised she had picked you only because its who her pointed finger found first. not any actual attraction. you swallowed down the hit to your ego that brought.

⋆˚✿˖° and honestly? the plan went on pretty steadily. you were a damn good fake girlfriend if you had to admit it, and abby didn’t hate being around you. in fact, she really enjoyed being around you. she enjoyed how easily your fingers reached down, tapping on her palm to fing a way to hold her hand whenever one of owen’s posey was around. she enjoyed how you leaned in whenever owen passed by, your lips on her ear, whispering anything you knew would have her smiling. a fake smile of course.

⋆˚✿˖° you two had some pretty strict rules. no kissing, no extreme touchiness, absolutely no spilling to anyone this was fake, and the most important.. no real feelings. you had come up with a backstory, one you two had studied together. (you two met in the training room after your roommate introduced you two and totally hit it off. abby got you a spot on her team next to her and manny, and feeling bloomed from there.) abby added in a few details she knew would piss owen off.. and you sealed your lips shut to follow the rules.

⋆˚✿˖° the first few weeks were easy. you liked spending time around abby. you enjoyed how she smiled, you laughed at all the jokes she cracked (for the fake dating points of course..), and you loved training with her. you had to ignore the shiver her hands on your shoulders or waist gave, knowing it was just to help your position. “you have to fix your stance if you plan on fighting scars..” abby huffed.

⋆˚✿˖° the problem started in october. a month and a half into your fake dating plan. tens of lunches spent alone together, a handful of new hair styles you begged to try on abby, and around 5 missions out of the base, in. there was a party, one you demanded the two of you go to one day as you lounged on abby’s bunk— watching as she cleaned up manny’s mess across the room. “if we dress up together, owen will totally finally get off your case,” you assured, bringing a loud sigh from the blonde. “oh my god.. fine.”

⋆˚✿˖° you went as a angel and devil, simple enough to easy stitch together some devil horns for yourself and an angel halo you found in an old broken down store in the city for abby. no way did you admit the trouble you went for to find it to abs, especially not as she easily pulled her shirt off in front of you, totally clueing you in to where the nickname came from as she shoved on the white teeshirt.

⋆˚✿˖° see, the no kissing rule was an important one, but vodka made everything seem less important, and owen was awfully loud that night, scoffing any time you smiled and leaned into your angel, head band tilting off your head, which abby fixed with a grin. “you two act more like friends than people fucking each other,” owen scoffed as he pressed by you two, the words pounding in abby’s ears over the loud mingling voices.

⋆˚✿˖° “kiss me,” abby called over the old cd that played on the speakers, her cheeks red with anger— blue eyes flicking around. “what?” you laughed, thinking back to rule number 1. “i know we said no— no kissing but i just.. oh my god just kiss me,” abby muttered, her large hands gripping your cheeks and pulling you in for a kiss, one she was sure owen was watching on to. one you melted into, sucking her lip in between yours.

⋆˚✿˖° that had been a breaking point, ragged breaths and heated necks as you pulled away. it lead to more excuses with less validity being used when the two of you stared at each other’s lips. stepping down the stairs of the base, eyes catching on someone who just looked like owen. “kiss me,” abby muttered quickly, and you wasted no time to turn your head and fill your nose with the scent of pine as you leaned in.

⋆˚✿˖° the no kissing rule crossed off right before the no touchiness one did, that one had been scribbled off completely when abby began pulling you into her lap in group functions, one soft hand rubbing up against your side as she whispered in your ear, “jus’ for show.”

⋆˚✿˖° just for show of course, but you screamed into your pillow for so long that night you almost thought the walls of your room would crumble down along with the barrier you put between you and the blonde.

⋆˚✿˖° kisses and touchiness turned to nights spent in abby’s room, mornings waking up and having abby’s shirt thrown at your face. “wear that, owen got it for me when we were dating.” sure, you probably should be ashamed to be wearing the clothes of a girl who didn’t like you, but the frown on owen’s face made it worth it.

⋆˚✿˖° that last rule, the one that didn’t have pen strokes over the letters, the one locked behind awkward coughs and side glances, well you weren’t sure who broke it first. you dont know why feelings came into play, but you sure do know it happened.

⋆˚✿˖° you felt it first when abby didn’t talk to you for a few days. you saw her across the stadium with nora, her head tilted back lightly in a laugh at something the other girl said. that was the first time you felt the needle sized ache in your heart, one that only ripped further when owen shoulder checked you on his way by, “better get your girl. she slips away easily.”

⋆˚✿˖° maybe that rule had been broken when abby stormed into your room, met with the sight of you on the couch with some other blonde girl, an old tape of a southern movie mid way through when anderson scoffed and demanded the girl get out. she did so in a hurry, scrambling for her sweatshirt as a frown grew on your lips. “abby what the fuck?” you scoff, watching her eyebrows unfurrow lightly. “you can’t have other girls over! it fucks with our plan,” she accused, though she stumbled lightly over the words. “she’s just a friend, abby.”

⋆˚✿˖° however, the night you sat in your bed, breath heavy and eyes stinging as you broke through the paper with the pen, scratching over the words “no real feelings,” that came in the end of november.

⋆˚✿˖° your head was pressed into abby’s shoulder, yawning and closing your eyes as the movie played on a big sheet, a biweekly occurrence in the WLF base. abby had pressed to your cheek, placing a kiss to it that had some sort of butterfly attack take fruition in your stomach. you two didn’t even know if owen or his friends were around, and they for sure were not the reason of abby’s hand linking into yours as you two walked toward her room later that night. you both seemed to realize that when you reached her door and she leaned forward just lightly, as if to kiss you.

⋆˚✿˖° she cleared her throat, licking over the lips you wanted to capture again. “i think-” she said suddenly, squeezing her eyes closed. “i think owen really believes it now.” you could feel your heart sinking to the empty stomach that laid below your chest, knowing what came next. “i think we should break up.” abby finished, quick to add, “fake break up.”

⋆˚✿˖° you nodded along silently to the story she built still standing in her doorway. miscommunication, arguments, differing plans, the whole shebang— anything to make the breakup believable. you agreed, but the moment her door shut, a half smile and thank you sitting on her lips as the door locked, you felt the tears prick your eyes.

⋆˚✿˖° you wiped quickly at the tears, your hand slapped over the aching chest you swore betrayed you. you sucked in shallow breaths, shaky hands finding your own door as your vision went blurry.

⋆˚✿˖° as your pen broke through the white sheet of paper, you cursed your own heart. you cursed it for being so easy to rip from your chest, presented on a platter for a blonde who only saw it as a fake replica. you threw the notebook across the floor, hand slapping over your mouth so your roommate wouldn’t wake as you sobbed into it. surely you had been the only one to break that rule, but that didn’t matter now.

⋆˚✿˖° but you were wrong. not that you could know that. a five minute walk away, abby breathed out slowly as her fingers scraped though the braid she was undoing, an odd stinging pricked at the corner of her lashes. she knew she did the right thing. she knew it as soon as her lips searched for your own at her doorway tonight. so why did it feel so bad? why did her hands tremble as she pulled out her blanket and climbed under it, squeezing her eyes shut.

⋆˚✿˖° if this was all fake, why did the break up feel so real?

[tac-the-unseen]

JUST READ THE COD GANG REACTING TO READER FALING AN ORGASM SO WHAT IF READER ADMITS THEY NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE?????? LIKE- NEW RELATIONSHIP??????? SORRY FOR CAPS IM ECSTATIC RN BC UR WORK IS SO GOOD🫶🫶🫶🫶🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌

COD characters finding out that Reader's past lover(s) have never given them an Orgasm.

Am I exactly sure what Anon is asking? No, But I will persist.

I'm choosing to write this with the interpretation of Reader never having an orgasm even though they've had sex with others. (The other way I read it was that Reader just flat out never had an orgasm before, and I think that's extremely unrealistic. So we're going with that one) ALSO because of the prompt You and the guys have yet to bump uglies!

Ghost:

•Simon is a little confused "Like...None of them?"

•He takes it very seriously

•He asks you to elaborate a little more. He just wants to know if the other guys sucked (or just didn't in this case) or if you two needed to do something specific in order to please you.

•He understands if you need some kind of accommodations and will ask you what he needs to do

•You and Simon have a long discussion over what you want your first time with him to be like. He makes sure you both have a clear understanding of what's to come (ha).

Soap:

•First thing he says is “Would you like to?”

•He thinks it's a little funny but really sad too

•”Darling, you're too pretty to let subpar men just use you.”

•He immediately wants to show you how it's done and what you've been robbed off

•He asks if he can take you for a “good ol' mustache ride”

Price:

•”Young men are dumb.” He says and takes a drag from his cigar

•”But I guess it's nice to know I have no competition.” He smiles

•He does talk to you about your needs and what he needs to do to meet them properly

•He takes you out on a nice dinner date, goes on a nice walk with you, and end up with his hands wrapped around your waist taking you home

Alejandro:

•Can not stop laughing

•As soon as you tell him he erupts into a fit of giggles. He takes him a full 3 minutes before he calms down enough to hug you and pat you back.

•”You poor thing.” he chuckles and kisses your cheek. “I'll make sure to make up for all their failures, Mi querida.”

•He’ll ask you what they were doing down there the whole time. Which leads to even more laughter when you tell him.

•”But I think I should buy you a nice dinner first.” he winks

Roach:

•Stunned

•Absolutely floored

•”Like never?” He signs. You can see the horror in his eyes

•He’s got his head in hands, contemplating life. He's so concerned for you. He has to take a moment of silence to comprehend the level of incompetence the men in your life must have had.

•When he finally sits up he looks you directly in the eyes and signs “Thank God I'm good with my hands.”

Gaz:

•Slowly turns his head to look at you with his brows furrowed and confusion

•Is too shock to speak

•He gets up to pour himself some Scotch

•”How many times have you had to fake an orgasm?” “8” he proceeds to down the entire drink and pour himself another

•This time he hands it to you “You need this more than me.”

Rudy:

•He gets up and takes a lap around the house

•When he gets back he pulls you into a hug

•”You deserve so much better, Mi Tesoro.”

•Kisses your jaw and runs his hands down your back. “I can give you so much better.” He tells you in-between kisses

•He offers you himself until your properly satisfied, for however long that takes

König:

•”Why do you like incompetent men?”

•He means it in a genuine way, But he accidentally reads you to filth.

•”Why spend your time and affection on someone who cannot please you?” he asks. “I didn't want to seem shallow.” You replied. “Shallow? Liebste, No.”

•He practically scolds you for allowing such men into your life. It's actually the most you've ever heard him speak. Which really tells you how upset he is.

•”You're Lucky I'm here. I will not let such things happen ever again.”

•And fuuuck, he means it

Mace:

•”Other men are filthy animals.” he tells you like it was a normal thing to say

•He gets in close to you and rests his arms on your hips. “Don’t get me wrong, I'm a man whore.” He laughs lightly and kisses you “But you knew that.”

•He asks you for all the funny details and thinks it would make a decent bonding experience.

•He tells you about his less than great sex stories and failures

•”Rest assured sweetheart, I'm a pro at making people scream.”

Thanks for reading <3

(I realize now that I wrote them all in different mindsets of this prompt... Good luck with that, I guess)

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 179 spoilers and thoughts that are like okay i can see where this is going and more below the cut

.

.

.

i'll get the first thought out of the way rn. i think i do see what they were trying to do now! this ep feels better than the last one!! i'll talk more about that below

right now though i am mostly entertained by HOW MUCH LLOYD LOOKS LIKE A SALESMAN IN THIS EP IN SO MANY PANELS HAHAHAHA

he looks like the

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

the panels in this ep genuinely are really great they're not terribly over the top besides a few and i think thats a good balance,,, i especially like the focus on the chief's reaction to all the changes that are going on in his life now that they have the choice of an alternative method (well,,, choice is said loosely LMFAO)

coming from last episode of lloyd going "oh yeah i love peace im a pacifist :)" to telling the demon kids "hey sometimes. theres people u need to beat up a bit. and people u need to beat up a LOT" and IT MAKES ME SMILE THAT THE KIDS TOOK THAT TO HEART HAHAHA

powerful ass kids. lloyd is teaching the younger generation to Take No Shit and i really like that,,, esp considering all the shit suho had to take in korea asldkjflajskdf

AND THEN WHEN THE VENETOS TRIED TO RAID THE CARRIAGE. HELP

obsessed w the composition of this panel. its nothing like new or clever per se i just really like how it looks , the light that pulls down from lloyd, to javier, to demon guy (I DONT KNOW IF HE HAS A NAME) i just,,, really like. they look like thugs. like bosses u have to fight in a row. ITS FUNNY I LIKE IT. this sequence as a whole was really fun,,,

javier and demon guy explaining that they either piss off or fight, AND THEN LLOYD GOING FROM THE MOST OMINOUS THING YOUVE EVER SEEN TO THE FRIENDLIEST LITTLE SMILE IN THE WORLD. AND OOOH,,, IT'S THE ROUTINE AGAIN,,, HAHAHAHA

like seriously he looks like a fucking car salesman. he's basically selling this whole financing thing he's got planned w the venetos,,,

like when he did the money exchange for goods thing i was like oh,,, he's scheming something with like finances and banking or something like that isn't he,,,,,,, salesman looking ass

ALSO THE NUH UH PANEL FUCKING SENT ME I HAD TO INCLUDE IT HERE

AND WHEN PPODONG KICKS THEM ABOUT AND HE JUST WALKS ON SCREEN AND STANDS THERE IM. the POSE HAHAHAHA you know i had to do it to em lookin ass. GOOFY

genuinely his poses in this ep are so stupid funny i love them sm . recently we've been seeing a lot of his face being Totally Evil Exaggeration or Seriously Going Through It but these goofy ass salesman poses and expressions are SOMETHING ELSE HAHA GOOD CHANGE OF PACE

and it's not like he's forcing their hand he's just stopping their usual avenues, bc he juuust so happens to be working in the area now for magentano,,,, honestly i think he would have put the chief into a corner at some point eventually, but it also seems like lloyd's efforts had also affected other aspects of the chief's life, like his relationship w his family and the other veneto hunters,,, which may have put the chief in the corner early,,, a matter of time, i suppose,,,?

like the chief had a lot of very like remorseful / realization type expressions in this ep, i really liked this one in particular,

and (okay i guess we're diving into the main thoughts now) i think now that i have the context of this ep for the previous week's ep, it kind of paints a picture of what exactly it was the adaptation team was going for. the venetos are prideful and rooted in inconvenient traditional ways, and lloyd's plan is a type of interference that twists that pride one way or another (though i dont think the chief feeling remorse after seeing his wife and child finally being okay with him was a part of lloyds plans LOL)

it,,, makes sense! and while yes it's due to lloyd's interference, it also feels like the chief is making a decision himself here, (in,,, in a way?) (not sure how to explain what i mean by that) like the chief absolutely sees how bad things had gotten under his original policies and outlook, and then saw the immediate change from just... changing the way they acquire goods. i really liked watching that happen, and it helps characterize him as someone who is so incredibly stubborn but really wants the best for his people, and the best he had known at that point was what they had done all this time.

this does makes me wish that ep 178 was handled with a lot more tact and awareness of what they are setting up for. i think if ep 178 had a similar tone as ep 179, it would have been received a bit better, maybe,,, of course i wouldn't know for sure, and i'm not sure how i'd rewrite it myself, but i think 179 handles the line between moments of thought and moments of gags a lot better than 178 (if that makes any sense). because of this, the chief in 179 feels different than the chief in 178,,, i would feel better about 179 showing his redemption process if 178 had been handled with just a bit more care. i don't think we needed to see a man bully/verbally abuse his family to show that the venetos are traditional in a detrimental way,,, while also nearly presenting everyone as a gag at that? man idk,,,

i'm not entirely sure still, maybe i'm just being sensitive or something, but regardless (and again), 179 feels a lot better than 178 so i'm really hoping this arc finishes strong,,,

anyway serious thoughts aside! WHEN LLOYD PULLED OUT THE CONTRACT I KNEW IT WAS OVER LLOYD HAD WON ALDKFJSDFHHAHAAAAA

ohhhh the signing,,, it's binding~ you're stuck now!! HAHA

AND THE REVEAL OF IT BEING LIKE. A FINANCING BANKING THING AFTER ALL I AM BOTH APALLED IN A /LH WAY AND HAPPY BC I FIGURED IT OUT BASED ON WHAT LLOYD WAS DOING HAHAHAHA

like wow. lloyd u r about to toss these people into the throes of capitalism . good job, i think,,,??? honestly it makes sense that lloyd would know how this works or how to do this considering all the financial trouble he faced in korea

NO WONDER HE LOOKED LIKE A SALESMAN IN ALL THESE PANELS TOO. HE'S A BANKER GUY IN THIS EP LAKDJFLSKJDFH god i hate him /aff wonder what his next step in the plan is,,, cause. how will this possibly get the venetos to do the job of keeping charge of the mountain railroad stuff??? like will they be more inclined to work to like pay off the bank stuff? <- does not know how banks and loans work

that's all for now,,, i am excited and hoping the next ep will keep going back up!!!

[heuldoch7b]

while i was gone, i was deeply contemplative about part of what made me take a hiatus in the first place, which is shame. long post forewarning

growing up on the internet (i was 10 when i started using the internet, back in 2010-11) and something i was (and frankly, still am) constantly exposed to was shaming others. ranging from "light hearted" shaming; this ranged from poking fun at an amateur artists work for it looking funny or it being super "tumblry" to shaming with the guise of social justice, you know "hey this artist draws X and thats BAD and if you support them youre JUST AS BAD".

when i was younger i poked fun at other artists and engaged in cancel culture, on a very small scale (just my friends and i) and i regret it. it was entirely due to my own low self esteem and peojecting fear of being made fun of myself. but ive retained that fear, even as i've matured and grown to understand how unkind it is to shame and mock others, ESPECIALLY as myself a weird, autistic artist who draws "cringe but free" stuff

and even with regards to problematic content, stuff that, reasonably more often than not, ellicits a "yuck" reaction out of most viewers, has turned more into a genuine social risk of getting a callout over being immoral or gross and losing your social circles and delving into isolation. this happened to me. i think it genuinely messed me up, and im dealing with it even now.

it has lead me to be avoidant of being honest about what i like, and being afraid of befriending others due to fear of being dropped again. this is of course not fair to you, potential reader, but unfair to myself as well. i want to develop a healthier respect for my friends as well as myself about what i do and dont like, and not feeling guilty for saying no or not liking something.

i think, as i remake my old pinned post, i am going to be more explicit on stuff, i like shipping the primarchs! i love it very much even. and if you do not thats absolutely A-OK. i like drawing the dismal warcriminals as genderweird. i like maybe skirting away from how chronically cynical and dour the universe (which i do still enjoy, im into warhammer FOR warhammer) and making silly, comfy stuff. fuck i LOVE drawing weird heroic nudity mythological scenes where some characters are like, centaurs, cause its sick as fuck.

and with all that i myself need to be okay with maybe people who i enjoy their work of dont really jive with all that, and that isnt the end of the world, its just being honest with oneself, and thats really important to do. i will be trying to maybe tag sensitive stuff like primarchcest better, so people can filter it out, but i am not gonna be hypervigilant about tagging everything because that would make me neurotic and id rather just be unfollowed or blocked at that point.

anywho, i really just wanted to put my thoughts down into words and share them, i honestly wrote this out and deleted it like 3 times already due to, hilariously, shame. but this is a really important topic to me and extremely relevant to my social presence on this website. i care for you all immensely, even if we are all strangers online.

i will be sad if i lose potential friendships over the things i like, but theres literally thousands of people if not more on this website, and it so fine and healthy to go like "eh no i dont want that in my life" to something like someones specific fuckin fandom art LOL

if any of you want to talk to me about your experiences with shame, id welcome it, may it be through a reblog or messaging me personally. i think its really important for all of us to be unashamed, mindful of course, but not stifling ourselves. be free have fun type stuff. i hope i can drop my own shackles too. thanks for reading

[movingthisblogcelestialtarot11]

Your future lifestyle 🥥🤍

Hey friends! I know my posts have been very slow recently, due to being so busy in the summer. Here is a new post 🍹🌃 dedicated to those who want to know their future lifestyle plans! Enjoy! Please feel free to like, reblog and comment ☀️

Pile 1: Hi there pile 1! Welcome to your reading 🌴🤍 I see for you all, a slower paced lifestyle is in your future. You will be taking your time rebuilding and restructuring your goals moving forward. Especially with how you save and spend money! Its very possible in the future you’ll have turned a hobby into a successful business that slowly draws money in. I see you’re hustling on the down low, more so private! I think this is amazing because you make your money in peace. And i think some of you actually want that, its better that way! Maybe you are surrounded by a lot of nose people, so this is a better lifestyle for you. I also see you guys will be focused on moving forward slowly, and surely. Not wanting to rush yourself, especially if you experienced a loss. I get lonely wolf vibes from this pile but its not bad! You guys are getting more comfortable being alone and you guys appreciate it. Love to see it 😻❤️ I also feel anyone who does not support you at this time, you will leave behind for the better! Thank you all so much for being here! Please support this blog 🤍

Pile 2: Hi there pile 2! Welcome! 🌃 I see for you all traveling may be in your future plans! Drinking as well—if some of you love that! I heard wine tasting or rum tasting—so maybe this is a bougie place you are going. Or maybe this is a regular place you’ll be visiting. I also heard mixology! So some of you may get deeper in a mixology hobby. If not, I see you guys having a lot of fun and appropriate life more light hearted and funny! In your future I feel there will be lots of surprises from your friends or even people who admire you! Like “hey lets hang out” or “i liked your outfit!” And its how you guys start talking. Im drawn to say that you guys may change your wardrobe in the future to accommodate a beachy style? Doesnt have to be! It could mean wearing more whites than usual, but its fancy! I hear you guys have a way of making clothes fit well, no matter the style! I see lots of invitations, laughter, friend groups forming, and a style change! Something that makes you feel like you! You feel like you can breathe in your body again which is beautiful. This lifestyle makes you feel lighter ☀️🍹 Thank you pile 2’s! I hope this resonated. Please feel free to like, comment and reblog.

Pile 3: Welcome pile 3’s! ❤️🤍 I see for you all going to a retreat or finding more mental peace is your priority! But also I heard “going where I belong,” So you guys will be taking your energy away from people or places that dont help you, and will move! Im hearing timeline shifting as well, so I wonder if you guys are really manifesting this new timeline of peace and sanctuary. I feel like you guys are health focused & it will improve moving forward! Your goals, fitness, gut health, all! I see someone doing pilates, journaling, meditating. So someone is really looking after themselves which is amazing. I also feel like I am over hearing as I share this message, so I feel there is an important message to keep going! Dont give up on your plans, especially if you’re health focused! And clarity regarding a situation will come in to change your path for the better. If there was someone or something not helping you see the truth, it will be removed and you will know what to do for yourself 🤍😻 I see lots of time being spent in nature, or by a beach, lake, even fishing. Thank you all pile 3’s! I hope this resonated and feel free to support the blog 🌴🥥

Thank yall for being here always ☀️ your love and support is appreciated!

Paid Readings 🥥☀️

[avengersassemble123]

The (un)expected Thanksgiving

Pairing: Ran Haitani x fem!reader

Since Im going through my Haitani brothers brainrot, especially Ran Haitani, here's a fic for all the Haitani lovers like me HAHA.

Age ranges of the characters are majorly in 20s. Ran is 24, while you and Rindou are 23.

PS: this is a female reader based fanfic. Majorly a crackfic

Inspired from the series 'THE BIG BANG THEORY' (7x09) The thanksgiving Decoupling.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I dont get it. Why am i being bullied here?"

"Just because i said so"

"Thats bullshit."

"Ran, be nice."

You three were preparing for the thanksgiving party at the Haitani brothers' place, since they insisted that they were the best and better party throwers than anyone in the whole of Toman, leading you to prepping up the food, you forcefully making Ran's lazy ass help you, while Rindou played a video game after helping to clean the house.

Currently the argument was being held between the brothers on Ran warning Rindou on beating him up if Ran's fell asleep and was disturbed by the others in the party, leading to the younger sibling defend himself back and you scolding your boyfriend on bullying his younger brother.

"Now i know how the Korean slaves felt in Japan..."

You gave him a deadpan offended look, eyebrow raised and staring at him, as he was sat like a grumpy cat busy playing his game. Your boyfriend snorted, making you kick his feet to shut him up.

"Are you seriously comparing you two's sibling fight to one of the greatest Japanese Korean tragedies?" You asked.

"Yes." Rindou grunted, shrugging his shoulders as if its the most obvious thing in the world, making you roll your eyes.

"Im surprised you guys even know that considering you two's level of education" you retorted, making offended gasps come out from the two brothers, "Hey watch your mouth, Im the eldest here. You dont back answer me. Ill kick your ass." Ran threatened playfully as he twirled a knife and pointed towards you jokingly, making you give him a 'sure' look.

"Rindou, ignore your brother, you know you can spend a nice thanksgiving anywhere, I spent one in Roppongi anyway, before i was dating Ran." you said, as you walked towards the living room couch.

"You did?" Ran asked, following me with a opened desert cup.

"Yea, back when i was dating my ex Kenji. It was really fun, we visited casinos, cheesy wedding chapels, roamed around malls, got drunk and explored the night life, and also almost landed up in a strip club, which was of course surprising as hell." you chuckled, unknown towards Ran being taken aback midway eating his desert, looking at Rindou, who had confused eyes darting towards his brother's, his attention completely off the game, as the brothers' exchanged confused glances between each other.

"Wait you went to chapel?" Ran asked. "Yea." you chuckled, as you continued to apply spread on my sandwich. "Why?" He continued.

"We had one of those silly fake wedding haha" you chuckled, thinking of it as a funny memory, while Ran's eyes squinted at you, visibly taken aback, as Rindou now removed the headphones from his ears and onto his shoulders, glancing between you two and seeing the interaction in confusion. "(NAME)," Ran started, now his desert kept on his lap, as squinted his eyes at her, "You know those are real, right?"

"Huh no they're not." you scoffed, assuming he was joking, as you continued to giggle and eat your sandwich.

"Baby...Rindou and I have been ruling Roppongi since we were 13...we know it inside out...Trust me, they are real." Ran responded, as now slowly set down his unfinished desert.

You slowed your chewing, your eyes blanking out, seeing that your boyfriend was indeed serious unlike his usual demeanour, as despair and nervousness slowly filled inside your body, "No..they're not" Your voice slightly quivered, as you looked at Rindou for backup, but instead was returned with the same confused nervous look as Ran's.

"Yea they are." Ran responded.

"He's right, they're real." Rindou confirmed.

You sat there nervous, as you started fidgeting with your sandwich, "B-But it didnt seem real..." You muttered, your voice whimpering, as you looked at both of them, as if trying to convince them and even yourself. You three exchanged glances between each other, but majorly you looking at Ran as he looked at you, this time his eyes widened and his mouth slightly agape.

"Son of a bitch" you both cursed under your breaths.

--- TIMSKIP 2 HOURS LATER---

It was almost time for your friends to arrive, as you guys were busy doing last minute preparations.

"I cant fucking believe you're married to that idiot." Ran muttered, as he aggressively continued to set up the tables with loud thuds.

You sighed as you were busy setting up the pillows and cushions of the living room sofa, "Would you stop it? we just did it as a goof."

"Goof or not, you two are actually married. you need to get this taken care of, or Ill handle it myself." Ran gritted, as he put down the nachos bowl with a 'thud'.

"I will. Why are you making it such a big deal?" you gritted as you finished dusting off the couches and bean bag.

"Oh i have a reason," Rindou spoke out as he was casually setting up the DJ system, "It could be because you said yes to marrying Kenji, but made Ran chase you till the end of the Earth as you showered him with resounding 'no's and making one of the kings' of Roppongi's ego hurt." Rindou didnt look up, as he was amused by the situation and the argument happening between you two, making him snort mentally at the kind of problem it is.

You and Ran both glared at Rindou, as he hummed and tested out his new tracks.

You sighed as you now stood in the middle of the living room frustrated, your hands placed at your hips. "So how do i undo this?"

"Im hoping you can get an annulment cuz it never happened." Ran replied.

"Great. Well what do i have to do?"

"Ran looked into his phone, searching for solutions when he spoke up, "It says here that you can get an annulment, if any of the following conditions are met. 1. Were you unable to consummate the marriage? Hah you? Next." Ran mocked, as you rolled your eyes and glared at him. "Is there any case of fraud, bigamy, want of understanding-"

"Want of understanding? What does that even mean?" you asked before being interrupted by the younger brother.

"Ding ding ding we have a winner" Ran cheered, mocking you, making you roll your eyes for the third time in the span of few hours, rubbing your eyes in frustration at the nonsense.

---

Soon your friends of Toman started coming in, as you guys greeted them as everyone started settling in and started mingling and partying.

You were talking with Shion and Mochi, "Hey thanks for coming in. Here's the bottle you wanted to taste." you replied with a bland and strained tone, making the two question.

"Whats with you?" Mochi asked, when Ran appeared and answered immediately, "Oh she's just mad at me because she just found out that she was married to her ex." Ran replied with a strained forced smile, looking at you the whole time, his hands inside his pockets.

"Really that dumbass you used to date? Tha-ts hysterical" Shion started laughing at the end midsentence, making you glare at him. "I cant believe i felt bad for opening this earlier." I said, before snatching the bottle from Mochi's hands and walking away. Mochi glared at Shion as the latter pursed his lips, "Congratulations you played yourself." "Shut up."

Soon enough the party started, along with everyone starting to realise the tension between you and Ran, as you told everyone not to worry about it Rindou coughing in the background.

Hinata, Takemichi, Draken, Emma, Mikey, Baji and Kazutora were hanging out in the kitchen going through the food stuff, when Senju barged out of nowhere, "Guys you wont believe what i just heard."

"What?" Hinata asked. "Im pretty sure she has some random bullshit to spout out" Baji joked, giving a high five to Mikey and Draken, as Senju rolled her eyes, giving him the middle finger.

"First off, fuck you Baji. Second off, did you guys know that (NAME) was married to her ex Kenji two years ago?"

"WHAT?" Everyone in the kitchen exclaimed, as they turned their heads towards a smug Senju, some of the people's mouth full mid bite (Mikey and his dorayaki). "Yea. thats the reason why we were uncomfortable with the tension between (NAME) and Ran."

Yuzuha came running in, before spotting Senju and visibly deflating, "You told everyone here already didnt you?"

---

As you were sitting with the girls that is Emma, Hinata, Senju and Yuzuha, talking about the situation as they had confronted you about it, when Ran came out of his bedroom, walking towards you, reading into his phone, "Ok ive readied the annulment papers, all that needs to be done is for you and that dumbass to sign it. Understood?"

"Yea."

"Oh and do it soon as possible will ya?"

"I fucking get it Ran, can you stop bothering me about this?" you gritted as you stood up and started walking towards his room.

"How the hell am i bothering you, when im just trying to get your ass out of this stupid mess?" Ran gritted back, as he stared at your back.

---

"How am i the bad guy? She's the one who married someone else. Im the victim." Ran ranted, as Rindou, Sanzu, Izana, Kakucho and Mochi sat on the couches drinking and watching the game on the TV"

"Sounds like Kenji's the victim. You're sleeping with his wife." Sanzu retorted making the other men snort. "Okay i see what your problem is...Can i weigh in here?" Izana asked, making Ran shrug. "Im trying to watch the game here, shut up."Izana retorted with a blank face before turning towards the TV, making the others finally burst out in laughter, as the braided male rolled his eyes in annoyance.

Just the you entered, walking towards your boyfriend, "Well, you'd be happy to know that i just spoke with Kenji, and he's willing to sign the papers." Ran nodded, making his way towards to you, both of you peeking in your phone together. "He's on his way here now." You said, making Ran look up at you with an incredulous look, "Wait, you invited him here?" Ran asked, slightly raising his tone.

"Im getting ready to weigh in here again." Izana called out, not turning his eyes off the TV, making Ran roll his eyes, before pulling you towards a quieter corner.

You both were at a quieter corner near the kitchen, arguing,

"I just don't understand why you had to invite him here today??"

"Because you wouldnt shut up about it. and when I called him, he had nothing to do so I just thought-"

"Hey guys" Kokonoi spoke up from behind the kitchen counter, "We're kind of talking here."

"Oh sorry we'll keep it down." you said apologetically, again turning towards Ran, but being interrupted again, "Oh no no, speak up."

Ran and you looked at him confused, before looking at Inui, Kisaki and Hanma behind him, the three males waving at you. "We are kinda bit further from you two's talking range, and we dont wanna miss anything." Kokonoi shrugged, making your mouth agape, squinting at their audacity before looking at Ran, who had an annoyed look.

"Well get ready to invite one more, because she invited Kenji over here right now." Ran said, before a loud 'WHAT' was heard.

Mitsuya slapped Peh's mouth shut, while Pah turned him around, alongside Mikey, Draken, Baji, Kazutora, who were pretending to look into some other directions, whistling some random notes and observing the surroundings.

---

After Half an hour, when the doorbell rang, every single person scrambled, waiting for the next moments of what was about to come.

---

"Well, here are the papers, you just gotta sign in here." Ran said, as he put forth the papers across the table, as you and Kenji stood across each other.

"Sorry I made you come over here on a holiday" you apologised, as you stood patiently at your side.

"Its alright." Kenji said, "I didnt have anything going on, plus, (NAME) told me we were married, and thanksgiving is the time to be with family." Kenji said with a wide tooth smile. If looks could kill, Kenji wouldve been tortured to death by the way Ran glared at him, while you blankly looked at your dumb ex. "Yea okay great, Can we just get this over with?" You said, as you took the pen and signed the papers.

"Great, by a few days, this marriage will be over, and you both can go seperate ways." Ran said, as you held the pen towards Kenji to sign it, "Here."

Kenji hummed before speaking up, "I dont know if i wanna sign these papers."

Everone 'oooed', as you both ignored the voices. You glared at Kenji with a 'are you serious look' while Ran had red in his eyes, "Why not?" Ran said, his voice raising, restraining himself to not beat the shit out of him.

"Because i think splitting up would be rough on the kids." Kenji said, making you two look at him with dumbfounded looks. "

"We don't have any kids" You say, "Are you sure, cuz you didnt know we were married until this morning." Kenji said, making Ran look towards you, smacking his lips and squinting his eyes, giving you the 'he's got a point' look, making you roll your eyes.

"Okay Kenji, you know neither of us thought this was real, i mean we were married by an anime character impersonater."

"Of course it was an Anime character impersonater. we could never afford a real one."

You looked at him with your eyes squinted and dumbfounded look, while Ran rubbed his hand over his face, "You married him instead of me? Yeah good call." Ran said, taking the pen from your hands and pointing it towards Kenji , "Sign the damn papers."

"Hang on" You said, pointing your hand towards Ran, "You know you've been a jerk about this all day. You always do this. Whenever i mess something up, you're right there to make me feel worse about it."

"That is not true." Ran argued.

"You know we couldve waited till Monday, signed the papers, and this wouldve all been over."

"You're the one who invited him here."

"Oh there we go again. Just another mistake you're throwing at my face."

"Not cool bro." Kenji said, poking Ran's shoulder with the pen, as Ran squinted at him annoyed and irritated. "Im starting to think you're not the guy i want dating my wife."

You held Ran's one hand back, not to let him physically strangle Kenji in front of the others.

Ran took a deep breath, before speaking up, "Yea, well she's not gonna be your wife for long."

"Oh no are you dying?"

Ran looked at the ceiling, while you closed your eyes in frustration, still holding Ran's one hand to calm him down.

"Im about to. Sign the damn papers." you said.

Kenji signed the papers as he happily said, "You know what they say, Happy wife..Happy life." He put the pen down on the table as he grinned and looked towards you both, while Ran gave him a sideye, his both hands on the table, while you took a deep breath.

---------

Soon the party ended, as everyone bid goodbyes. Finally only you, Ran and Rindou were left. Rindou went to his room, while you and Ran sat beside each other on the couch, watching TV, and eating ice cream.

You sighed, as you slid an arm underneath his, "Hey, i'm sorry about today. And i promise that the next time i get married, it wont be a joke. It'll be for love. Or money." i said nodding my head, before giving him kisses on his cheeks and his lips before resting my head on his shoulders, as Ran snorted on your words. He then moved his hands to wrap around you, as he then retorted, "Its a win win for me, since i qualify for both", making you chuckle, as you both continued to cuddle and watch TV and eating the tub of ice cream.

[thedemonsnightmare]

Hii! Can you write a scenario where MC is like REALLY obsessed with a anime character(if you want a specific then im so in luv with Dazai from bsd, I mean who isn't??) and gets kinda jealous and possessive🥹👉👈. Thank you sm🩷

Of course, just saw that question today and as it’s my posting day I‘m making that scenario right now hope you like it

Lucifer-

Honestly he is used to things like that from Leviathan, but you? Obsessed with a fictional character? Lucifer actually wasn’t sure what to think but he couldn’t help to admit that he was kind of jealous. Today was your evening together and he was wanting to win your heart back! So other than usual he was not careful with his affection or how much to show. He would just randomly stand up and hug you, kiss you if you‘d let him and show affection in the cutest way ever which is strange seeing from the always serious Lucifer even for you who usually gets to see his softer side. When you ask what is going on he will whispered into your ear. „Why are you obsessed with him? I am the one you should love the most!“ He will kiss you all over your face and sit down again making an invitation for you to sit down onto his lap and as soon as you get closer he pulls you into his lap wrapping both arms and legs around you not letting you free for all evening. You are his love, not that of some fictional, DRAWN character. (Funfact: He will watch the show just to find out why this CHARACTER is such an obsession to you).

Mammon-

He will not show that he is jealous! He is much better than that Anime character anyways! No need to worry… okay no he worried anyways. He entered your room without knocking. “Oi! You are my human you get it? I was your first!” If you are confused he will not explain what is wrong. He will let himself fall into your bed and decided not to leave anymore. You will need to get close to him if you ever want to sleep and he will wrap his arms around you possessively. “My human, you get it?” He fell asleep faster than you did. In your arms he feels safe… no he doesn’t… yes he does. He will never ever admit it to you in his whole life but he will always know that that’s the case.

Leviathan-

He knew he couldn’t actually be jealous that you were obsessed with an anime character. He was the same but honestly he still felt jealous. Leviathan felt super insecure and unsure if you would even care for him, what if that anime character is more important than him? Ruri-Chan was his life but he needed you! You were important for him! You two were often meeting up to play video games or watch stuff and when you two did that again he seemed super down making you ask what was wrong. “Are they more important than me?” He looked at his controller sad as he kept playing. When you asked what he meant he explained to you. Honestly it was funny seeing Leviathan worry about something so minor as he was obsessed with Ruri-Chan but it was somehow heartbreaking at the same time especially how he would clearly avoid touching you scared you wouldn’t like it but at the same time craved hugging you and never letting go. As soon as you answered him that you still cared he would wrap both arms around you laying his chin onto your shoulder. The gaming session ended that way and became a long cuddle session in which he kissed you again and again blushing every time.

Satan-

Satan couldn’t believe it! You were obsessed with some… random character! Jealousy… He ran over to your room knocking and when you told him to come in he does, closing the door and jumping onto you which at first seemed more like an attack than a loving act but he soon gets super sweet while in that position showing all his affection. “You will not leave me… right?” Satan is definitely unsure if you would bring it over you to leave him for a work of fiction. He trusts that you won’t but somehow he is scared as he doesn’t understand the feeling of being obsessed to a character especially not an anime character who was even visualized and he only knows it from other people making him unsure of how someone would act in that situation. He just wants to be one hundred percent sure. He is feeling super possessive already if you would say you’d leave him he would try winning you back but be honest would you really leave that boy?

Asmodeus-

Let’s be honest as much as I want to write a long story for him Asmodeus doesn’t get jealous at all. He is definitely the number one and he knows it. No need to get possessive over such a minor detail it’s just an anime character after all but he still gives you all his affection after finding out just to be sure.

Beelzebub-

Surprise visits are always fun and after finding out about your obsession with that anime character he didn’t even know, he decides to pay a surprise visit right in that moment carrying as much food with him as he can entering your room. In the end he eats most of it but you two have an awesome time. If you let him he will even feed you some cake.

Belgephor-

This demon just wanted to sleep but that obsession of yours was really worrying him so he grabbed his favorite pillow knocking at your door, when you opened he looked at you with the cutest look he could do. “Can I sleep in your room?” When you allow him he enters throwing his pillow onto your bed climbing in. He will demand that you go to sleep too so he can cuddle. He wants his cuddles! As soon as you are in you will not be able to leave the bed, even the pillow is forgotten! Something usually impossible.

I am thinking of making a version where all of this occurs at the same time so tell me if you’d want to see that chaotic story

[klayfruit]

hi i really hope this doesnt come off as like. Ohh theres rtvs drama i need to add MORE and show these guys need to be Cancelled!!!! boiling down the crew’s immature response to being criticized as racist as just, Drama and controversy, is really shitty. what i wanna say next is just something completely unrelated to that, i just felt more Encouraged to say it at this time because i feel less afraid that im gonna get called silly for it.

ok so my main point is, i am concerned with how often rtvs (mostly specifically wayne, i cant recall anyone else in rtvs doing this) still uses ai in their stuff. by this i’m talking about the recent-ish novelai stream and to an extent the songs in the bbvr stream. i absolutely love the bbvr stream and i do appreciate what wayne’s said about the songs themselves, that theyre more comedic than meant to be Actual Art—same with whatever novelai writes being nothing but comedic and not actual art—and i agree with that partially. ai Can be funny as fuck in a very specific kind of uncanny and disgusting way that cant really be achieved by humans. but, by using that ai to create jokey stuff, you are still feeding the ai to be used by people that are genuinely serious about using ai. and whats most important to me is the environmental damage that comes with using ai, which i have not seen anyone in rtvs mention at all.

one thing thats kind of made me scared to talk about this is when i mentioned this on twitter (though admittedly i brought it up in a very Dumb way, it was me being afraid that scorpy’s section in the pizza tower stream was written by ai bc it just felt really convincingly nonsensical in the same way ai writes stuff, but now i know i was just Straight up wrong thats just how scorpy writes), scorpy qrted me without really addressing my concern and led to lots of people in my replies. again, what i was concerned with really Wasn’t as major as i was worried it was + my response to it was silly because i wasnt expecting so many eyes on a tweet i made just for my followers, but it would have seemed a lot better to talk to me directly about this instead of not even giving me a solid answer.

i am a minor so i cant go into wayne’s discord to talk about this/look at discussion (and i hope me being A Minor doesnt also diminish my opinion as well), so i’m sorry if im regurgitating stuff thats already been talked about by the crew!

[oniricdiary]

Ok so I know none of y’all is ready for this conversation but now y’all gotta be ready cause we’re sitting down and we’re having it.

EYE am the first one that physically collapses and starts foaming from the mouth when this conversation is brought up but I’ve rarely ever seen people look eachother in the screen and be direct, sincere, blunt, only people on tiktok, so EYE am gonna say this and get it out of my chest cause I can’t do it no more.

CANON AOT CHARACTERS ARE MUSTY, CRUSTY, STINKY, FILTHY, NASTY, MUCKY.

Yall just remember that all events from season one (from trost) to season three all happened in the span of FOUR MONTHS. Four months in which they went on mission god knows how many times and how long. When had my babes got time to clean themselves? LIKE TWO. Two full body cleanses and maybe a couple more but they were just armpits and face. They were surely unbearable to be around. And don’t get me started on the skid marks, that’s the ultimate proof. Like literally how many times did they clean up from head to toe and change/wash all of their clothes. Let’s not think about it moving on.

ik you guys won’t hear me out on this but cadet days were the worst. Self care products were probably expensive and limited as wall Maria had fallen, so they couldn’t even use a proper amount. Kids going through PUBERTY. A big bunch of BOYS training ALL the time under any weather with LIMITED soap. Any of you ever been in a boys’ locker room or a freshman class? You remember the smell right? Cause you ain’t forgetting such violation. Yeah now imagine that in cramped living spaces like the barracks FULL OF FILTHY PUBESCENT BOYS living there all the time everyday. Like I’d rather have a corpse under my bed than walking in there. The girls were better but not THAT MUCH. They were going through evolution🎉 too.

So like canon aot fics are so good like chefs kiss but when I remember this…ik it’s gonna be painful. Y’all remember that napoleon letter to his wife? No? Yeah? Those who do, you get what I mean. I mean I’m not like shaming anybody or kinkshaming or whatever but can a girl wonder.

The matted, oily, dandruffy, dusty hair. The sticky face. The death breath for panting for a long time without eating or drinking or rinsing. The STENCH especially on the boys (ik eren and Reiner were lethal) BUT THE GIRLS TOO THEYRE NOT SAFE. The built up sweat from wearing the same clothes for four months. The dirt under the nails. THE CHEESY FEET. The fungis under those clothes. I physically cannot go on I’m sorry but there would be so much more to say it’s not even funny atp.

Again I’m just wondering like I’m being realistic no shame at all, I’d be in the same situation if I woke up there tomorrow, I’d have a panic attack for sure because I care too much about my hair but like again, what can i do ima kill titans and think about my marinated armpits later right? Don’t cancel me please.

Like I’m just wondering how in fics did they even kiss during those times or like do the devil’s tango in the barracks or anything else at all. Like am EYE the clean freak or do you guys see the vision???? I guess there is a smut plot armor too. That’s impressive I mean it.

Anyway for anybody wondering YES LEVI TOO. He can’t escape the mustiness and has the same chances at cleaning himself as the others HOWEVER we know he’ll do it correctly unlike somebody else.

Again ik they were different times and situations I’m just wondering yk whatever cancel me.

WARNING: THIS WAS A 4AM STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS AND IM NOT GOING TO REREAD IT, IT 99% WONT MAKE SENSE TO YOU AND THAT’S FINE, IM ON THE VERGE OF DEATH (RUSSIAN SLEEP EXPERIMENT VICTIM) AND NOTHING EVEN MAKES SENSE TO ME RN. DANCE TO THE BIG BIG BEAT.

[wind-up-thancred]

bit of thancred character musing under the cut that im gonna try to approximate from a 6am discord rambling into something i can actually post. both SHB and EW spoilers included

i saw some folks talking on twt about how guilt seems to be a very important factor in his life and i agree. i think a lot of major parts of his character and arcs have been due to guilt over something he did (or didnt even really do, re: the whole goobue rampage situation). it's driven him to work his ass off after louisoix which lead to him getting possessed... but its probably also what motivated him to do better for ryne after being forced to look his fuckups directly in the eye instead of just wallowing about them. but i think, at the same time, he doesnt really seem to, like... actually be proud of himself for a lot of the stuff he's done in order to work off that guilt? the biggest giveaway for that being the line in endwalker on the ragnarok where he talks about his "good deeds" cynically and seems to insist that they were never really that impactful in the first place. that they'll just go to dust when he dies.

in shb, during the ahm areng segment, not only does he talk down on himself in general, but also puts down his attempts to help OG minfilia back in the pre-ARR days... when i'm pretty sure she never even blamed him for the goobue rampage in the first place.

it's all a little bit sad to me, tbh. i've seen some people reason that, because he was only able to escape poverty due to louisoix seeing potential in his thieving skills, he's essentially internalized the idea that he's only really worth keeping around by ANYONE if he's actively being productive, either helping others or trying to fix whatever fuckups he feels he's made. i think that would explain a lot of this

note the "few positive traits" line, which to me comes across as "i was only picked up out of childhood poverty because he thought my skills were useful." though i don't really know how much of that mentality he's managed to work past by post endwalker. he IS able to go off on his own, and mentions that he trusts the scions to keep themselves safe now... but as i ranted about before, the short story points out that he's only really content to rest briefly before he feels obligated again to seek out unrest to try and help, specifically mentioning minfilia again. also, a couple times during the story, notably post ARR after his possession, mid SHB after he's wounded in a fight with sineaters, and post SHB after he passes out due to the weakening soul-body bond, he seems to dislike even having to rest for medical reasons

it's a pretty interesting part of his character to me. idk if the writers specifically had his rigorous upbringing in mind when they wrote these parts of his character, but to me it would make a lot of sense as an explanation for why he's so averse to rest and why he carries so much guilt and why he's so passionate about keeping the folks around him safe. that's kinda been his whole reason for life since he was a kid-- using his skills for the benefit of others. to him, doing anything other than that would be a waste, it seems.

idk. funny guy makes my heart hurt. yes i had all these dialogue screencaps saved and on hand. yes i am a little insane. what of it

[heavynightshade]

sam likes broken toys

pairing. sam winchester x ofc!hunter summary. ofc is on the verge of a nervous breakdown, but she doesn't seem to know. word count. 1200 a/n. it's written in first person, but i believe it can be read as "x reader". also, english isn't my first language and im currently watching the second season of supernatural. tags. angst with a happy ending, i think

chapter 2 | chapter 3 (soon)

Why in the nine circles of hell is Sam Winchester laughing at the blonde at the bar? I personally wouldn't know. God, why a blonde? Dean loves to say that I have some kind of complex with everyone who has too little melanin in their hair and make it everyone else's problem. Whatever.

We're somewhere in the backwoods of Louisiana, hunting some kind of vengeful spirit. Supposedly a father who killed his entire family and then killed himself. We only have a few problems: Dean's car broke down, my laptop stopped working and the bones of the father in question are missing. What a great week!

When I enter the bar where we agreed to meet, I avoid staring too much, like, I don't want to seem desperate or psychotic, so, I go straight to the side of the bar where Dean is.

"A beer, please," I ask the bartender.

"On the house, sweetie," he answers.

Well, I'm not ugly, seriously. But I've had better times. Surprising.

I could have sworn I saw Sammy's back tense for a second, but then he just turned and nodded at me. Whatever. I'm going crazy (unofficially).

"You seem absolutely disturbed, especially today," Dean starts a conversation while looking at the waitress with a certain hunger.

"We have to work, you know?" I sigh. "Disgusting!"

"We don't have anything similar to the internet in this backwater, and the library is protected by Fort Knox for some reason," he takes a sip of his drink. "And you know, he's only attacked on even-numbered days so far. So happy Friday the 13th! Go relax."

Dean smiles and walks towards the waitress who had passed by seconds ago. Oh, my god, something tells me not to wait up for him. Kids, — he's older than me — grow up so quickly…

Sometimes I think about the dream I had the other night. Sure, I've dreamed about the brothers a few times, usually about the hunts, and it ends with someone almost, or actually getting killed. Sometimes I kill them, when I take the place of the monster of the week. My psychiatrist probably has some opinion on this, but whatever, I could handle a nightmare. Sure, beat the trauma once or twice a week.

But this time, it was even worse. I had sex with Sam, or rather, he fucked me brainless. He corrupted my dignity. And for God's sake, the memories alone are enough to make me cry, again. I’m afraid to even look at his face. The shame could kill me. Thinking about it, death seems like a pretty funny experience, you know. That didn't matter, right now he was apparently having a lot of fun with someone else, and he would probably have a lot more fun soon.

Yeah. Sammy deserves better.

Sam was still caught up in the conversation with the blonde. My crush on him was probably reaching levels that were much less mature and less feminist than I should have expected, which is detestable. I like to be someone with ideals, and I would like those ideals to resist a 6'4" man who looks like a walking encyclopedia. We need more sisterhood!

Fuck it.

Of course the jealousy made me sick. Every second by their side is enough to make me even sicker. Oh my God, I'm burning. I hated blondes and the only exception I can make is Stevie Nicks.

I have poor self-control, when it comes to candies, tequila, Chesterfield Black and Sam Winchester.

I look at the analog clock on the wall, a big red one that matches my lipstick. After all, I don't think it's good to have personality crises early, but, I mean, it was already past 11pm.

After that I ordered a shot of whiskey and headed over to a pool table. In fact, I am an excellent player. If the Winchesters can have fun, why can't I do the same?

Can manage to laugh a little with some guys for a few minutes. Yeah, maybe I prayed a little that one of them would want to sleep with me. I could be good at something.

As I go to bend down for the next move, a hand weighs down on my arm. I instinctively use the bat to hit him, but I'm partially unarmed, so the blow doesn't have full force.

"Why are you doing this to me?" His gaze makes my body burn. As if I was being judged on Doomsday, the only difference was that I cared about the future when it comes to him.

"Sam? What? No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." I mumble a few words. When did he get here?

"Why are you torturing me, Ivy?”

Ivy, like poison ivy, I thought. Sam told me once that I was filled with poison but blessed with beauty and rage. He was drunk as fuck, or it as me? I avoided thinking. I am not able to deal with things. I have not been able to for a long time. I’m no good.

I can barely think of a response as he drags me across the room. Sam's soft eyes and brusque attitude leave me confused. And I just let him lead me. Unfortunately, I trust him.

Sometimes alcohol makes me shaky, and this was the only reasonable explanation for what was happening now. I'm confused and in nicotine withdrawal, I keep telling myself, again, and again. I'm shaking.

Outside the bar, sam, lets go of me, almost throwing me against the wall, but he doesn't. His puppy dog eyes, he's so gentle. Gentler than I ever deserved. Perhaps, his kindness was the real violence.

“Listen, Sammy, I’m sorry, again, I didn't mean to hit you” Actually, I’m not sure about what to say.

“I won't tolerate your shit this time”

What the actual fuck?

“Don't look at me like that. Day after day you've been killing yourself. Acting like you hate this life. Hating each and every one of us. Hating Dean. Hating me.” His voice trembles. Sam runs his hands through his hair, like he's going to die if he doesn't speak up now. ”God, why don't you accept help? Why do you carry this weight on your shoulders alone?”

“Calm down, Sam. I'm a grown woman. I'm fine, I swear. The last week has just been stressful, that's-”

“Shut up! Jesus! You drank so much, as if some kind of dry law was going to start tomorrow! You only eat shit and don't get me started on the night terrors” He sighs “Fuck, I wish I could distance myself from you a little.”

“Why are you saying these things?” My eyes were watering, but I didn't want him to see me crying. Damn it.

“Because maybe if I could stay away from you, maybe I could love you less, and not care about you destroying yourself day after day.”

My face was wet with tears, but I couldn't understand the reason. I wanted to speak but I couldn't. unable to formulate a coherent thought and express it.

“But you know what? There is no corner of the earth that will keep your name from burning in my memory. I will never be able to be far enough away from you.” Then he hugs me, and I lose track of time as I cry. “I'll always be your friend, Ivy.”

a/n. thank u so much for reading. lmk what you think!! im planning make this a three chapters history, so if u have any suggestions feel free to tell me!