#im already not happy with it when i do it alone mostly bc it gets super circular if im not allowed to like. change what im doing. ie at wor

[beeelderly]

the compulsion to voice the conversations in my head out loud get stronger the less sleep i get

[in-som-niyah]

hi!! i’m literally so obsessed with your work i’ve been scrolling your profile all day 😭😭 i was wondering if you could write something about jason x fem!reader getting married? mostly fluff but ill never say no to some good smut

a/n: "i’m literally so obsessed with your work i’ve been scrolling your profile all day" WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNNNN STOP UR GONNA MAKE ME CRY THIS IS EVERYTHING TO ME HELLO??? like wdym u like my work so much u spend so much time on my blog i love u gimme kiss

anyway this prompt is *chefs kiss* bc we all know Big Bad Jason Todd™ is such a loverboy softie but most of all he loves hard.

I think that before he met you he never thought that he would be so enamoured with someone who also feels the same way about him at the same time, that also wants to marry him??? He thinks he's too flawed and violent and abrasive for someone to even like being around him. So marrying him??? haha you're funny.

But after YEARS (yes, it takes him years of a committed relationship with you to fully trust that you actually like being with him for an extended period of time, let alone forever) of handling his emotions, outbursts and injuries with grace while still giving him a whack at the back of his head when he's being stupid, he considers marrying you.

Remember, Jason Todd is fucking scared himself, and he doesn't want to scare you off with a ring that literally promises forever with him. Though he loves you, he wants you to be happy in the end. Will you be happy with him in the end?

It takes a lot of mental and emotional strength to overcome these fears that swirl around his head.

When he does get over it though, he's so attentive yet sneaky when picking your ring. There's a luxury jewellery store on the way to your favourite clothing store at the mall, and he literally takes you to the whole mall just to pass by the store. He always looks to see what your eyes catch, what you like and don't like. Doesn't matter if he ends up spending hundreds since you're at the mall so much, he'll do it just to make sure he gets exactly what you want.

Jason also uses his extensive detective training to find out what cut and stone you want on the ring. He's ok with diamonds, but would want something more unique and personal for his love. He wants something that always reflects you, no matter the occasion.

Side note: once the ring comes he would definitely put together a photo album of pics he took of the ring in plain sight while you're completely oblivious just for shits and giggles

Finally, when it's time to pop the question, he doesn't do flashy and big productions with lights and letters and petals and stuff.

He would be dancing in the kitchen with you on a lazy Saturday, eating pancakes and bacon and when the song ends just casually asks "if I were to ask you, would you marry me?" Now he looks collected as he lovingly smiles down at you but is actually shitting himself until you say that you would in fact marry him if he asked. Then he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the most perfect, detailed, gorgeous ring you could ever ask for while properly asking you to marry him. Cue the waterworks (from both of you) and the celebratory make-out sesh.

Y'all definitely fucking the night of the proposal though

I feel like it would be realllllly possessive since yk you literally belong to him now

"tell me who this pussy belongs to, pretty girl" Knowing full well you can't answer because your eyes have already rolled back mid-stroke and you're babbling incoherently. It does, however, put a smug ass smirk on his face.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n pt2 bc i can't shut up: i hope u like it!!! i wasn't in the mood to write anything smutty but idk im in my soft era for jason i just want his stoic self to love me :(((((

[nr1chaedickrider]

'i just can't leave you alone.'

need her so bad actually...... been thinking about perv nayeon sooo much.. real jihyo fans know where the title is from hehehe

cw: kinda stalker nayeon??, voyeurism (idk if its the right term but the members are next to them), unnie kink (aka nayeon gets turned on by you calling her unnie), dubcon, somnophilia, idk maybe even gaslighting? light bondage (hands are tied together)

not proofread bc its six in the morning im tired sorry for mistakes

_______________________________________

Nayeon, the oldest member of twice, is especially known for her love for the maknae line, especially you. Being the youngest member with 23, she always took care of you like the good unnie she is!!

But what if her care for you goes too far?

_______________________________________

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" the member flood the gc with messages as soon you wake up.

You're now 24 years old.

You already know that the members planned something for you, especially nayeon.

She is behaving weird since some weeks...

Pictures of you sleeping appearing in your room after you come back home from schedule.. Its like she is watching you.

But its normal... right???

Its nothing bad. Or weird.

_______________________________________

You dress up, walking to the living room since its now later in the day, and the members of course want to celebrate with their dear maknae.

"hi guys" you greet them as you walk into the living room, they all smile at you and hug you, nayeon hugging you, but not wanting to let go.

"I love you so much Y/n, happy birthday!! Ive prepared something special just for you.." she whispers the last part. Sending you shivers down your spine.

You try ignoring it, starting conversations with your members, playing games, drinking and other stuff.

But it was like someone was watching you the whole time.

Of course, after some time, the members (actually mostly just jeongyeon and jihyo..) want to play with minas switch, so they start playing mario party. Nayeon sits down next to you on the couch while the other members are busy being competitive.

You feel a finger trace your thigh under the blanket.

You look at Nayeon who smirks at you.

"Nayeon- what are you doing" you whisper-shout, taking her hand and putting it away.

"Shhh.. you dont want them to hear, dont you?" she whispers into your ear, nibbling on it as she places her hand on your core.

"i-" your shocked.

Why is she doing this?

She cant.

She is like your big sister!

"nayeon stop-" you try pushing her away without the members noticing.

She thrusts her fingers inside, making you let out a whine which you quickly cover eith a cough.

The members are too busy playing those stupid games.

You try to hide your moaning, it feels good... But you cant do this.

"nayeon please-" you still try to push her away, her fingers burried deep inside of you.

She pulls her fingers out.

"Come to my room in an hour." she whispers seducingly in your ear.

What is she doing?

_______________________________________

You stand infront of Nayeons door, knocking.

Once, Twice.

She pulls you into her room, shutting the door and locking it.

A soft black silk cloth touches your wrist. You cant even progress what happens.

She pushes you to her bed, your wrists tied together in a tight knot.

"Nayeon-" you try to say something but she pushes you so much, you fall onto the bed.

She looks down at you, only know you realise she has almost nothing on.

"Im tired of doing this only when you're asleep.." she says, sitting down on your lap as she starts kissing your neck, sucking on it like a wild animal.

You let out some whimpers.

"Nayeon please- what do you mean-" you look at her while she eagerly takes of your shirt.

Your bra lands on the floor right after she took of your shirt.

"Your nipples are so hard... You just want me to suck them. Dont you baby?"she grins. Taking one of your erected buds in her mouth, sucking, nibbling on it.

A part of you enjoys it.

But most parts of you need to know what he fuck she said before..

"n-ahhyeon-", you try saying, "what do you mean with in my sleep-" you try silencing your moans. But damn is she good at this.

"Oh about that?" she smirks, leaving your nipple as she looks at you.

She gropes your tits with her hand as she smiles.

"I have been watching you in your sleep.. These cute pictures of you sleeping? I took them! They look amazing dont they?" she says so.. proudly?

"i-.. this is weird nayeon- you're perverted!" you say, trying to free yourself from the cloth that is tied to your hands.

"And what if i am?" she says, taking off your pants as well as your underwear.

"Your panties are so soaked.. you are enjoying this while calling me a perv??" she says smiling, her cold, long finger slowly circling your clit.

You whine a little. "No nayeon-" she continues circling your clit, slowly starting to rub it, with less and less softness.

"You want this. I know it.. or else you wouldnt react like this." she moves her finger to your face, showing you how its full of your slick.

"i-" you can feel yourself blush.

She shoves her fingers inside of your mouth, "suck." she demands you. You look at her weirdly, then slowly. You start to suck.

"Such a good girl for a perv." she whispers as she kisses your neck again, leaving marks here and there. You continue sucking on her fingers. The praise making you want this even more.

I mean a little pervertness cant hurt...?

She pulls out her fingers, and without even a warning, just shoves into your hole in a second.

You let out a louder moan.

She moves them fast, so eagerly.

"your moans sound better when you're awake.." she says, sucking on your nipple while her fingers are thrusting in and out of you.

Everything is overwhelming.

You start to sweat, your breaths are cut short. Your heart beats rapidly.

All because of Nayeon.

Already after some minutes, you feel yourself clench around nayeon fingers.

"Nayeon- i-"

"Cum for me princess." she interrupts you.

The princess sends you off as you cum onto her fingers, letting out a louder moan.

She slowly pulls her fingers out.

'Click' you look at nayeon, she took a picture???

"I should show this to her.." Nayeon says while smirking.

"Her?? What do you mean-" you ask, very confused.

"You will see." she says. Taking her clothes off.

"But now lets get back to us."

[theo-raeken-appreciation]

got any theo fic recs?

of course!!! let me pull up my faves, linking them under the cut cause it might get long (also some fics are nsfw some aren't i didnt tag them all bc by the time i realized i had been through so many already)

Theo Raeken Centric (sometimes gen/sometimes w/pairings)

Why are Werewolves Always Teens? by Everlasting_mediocrity 

Crossover. In which Tony Stark is Theo Raeken’s biological father and they’re going to have to do some growing about it. Thiam. Ongoing.

i lost my heart under the bridge by infernal_gay_mess

"The Doctors said, years later, that Theo had taught them that true evil came from corrupting something truly good. What they didn’t tell him was that the best way to make someone into a monster was to convince them they already were one." Angst & Tragedy

blood is running deep, some things never sleep by likelightninginabottle 

Aka theo raeken’s mid-season six hot girl summer. Introspective. Thiam. 

a rose that won’t bloom by wormhusk

not theo centric, but a cute fic about stiles-scott-theo as kids and theo being scott’s first crush. thiam. 

pyrrhic victory of knowing yourself by painting_ethereal

a two part series of stolen memories, theo joining the mccall pack, leaving, and choosing to come back

even in the darkest places, flowers grow by strawberxi (Tupipsie)

a theo raeken-centric fic where he grapples with his sister's birthday, and the implication that he doesn't have to do everything alone. Thiam

On Theo Raeken and Manipulation by wormhusk

Theo Raeken Did Nothing Wrong 2k23. Not A Fic/Pure Meta

Thiam

Secondary Drowning by marrowbite(wingfooted)

in which theo is a selkie. 

hey i think he likes you (but honey, i do too) by fallingforboys

in which liam is oblivious and wants to help theo get a boyfriend. 

Im not ready to die yet, should i pray? (i’m wasting time, haunted by the ghost of you) by petitommo

the one where theo leaves for Florida. out of necessity, not choice. voicemails, missing liam, waiting–and going home. 

tell me no more secrets, i’ll tell you no more lies by likelightninginabottle

“You were attacked. It was self defense.” Theo. “Okay, but what if it wasn’t.” Liam

when oblivion is calling out your name, you always take it further than i ever can by likelightninginabottle

In which Liam is terribly high and completely smitten, Theo is allergic to emotions and totally whipped, Mason has the patience of a saint, and everybody wins, except for Stiles

when you crave someone (to be there at dawn) by likelightninginabottle

(In which, for once, Liam and Theo aren't oblivious, even if the pack very much is.) Post-Monroe, Pack in College, Thiam Being Shameless

burning bright red till the end (now you’ll be missing from the photographs by likelightninginabottle

MCD, Angst

You Missed, Dumbass by Sailorscout7

(OR 2 times Liam trying to kiss Theo ended in disaster and 1 time it mostly didn't)

a fire without a spark by lexisaurus

Liam asks are you alright? it never occurs to Theo that Liam could be asking him, too.

Commemoration, Cauterized by Ty_Winn_Roa

Meeting his parents for the first time in a decade is terrible enough without having to do it all over again. And again. And again. But Theo's never done anything halfheartedly.

Hunting Hearts by l_t_m

“My heart is missing.” Liam blinked. Theo’s way of saying ‘hello’ wasn’t encouraging.

no angels in this bleeding heart town by fallingforboys

“Please don’t make me do this,” Liam says, pleads. His jaw clenches and he squares his shoulders. Theo’s claws flick out.

Happiness is (where you are) by crier_emperor

in which theo gets a home and a hug. Angst. Getting together.

pride before a fall, wolves will keep you warm by likelightninginabottle

Liam comes out of the closet, in more ways than one. Or rather: his friends break him out. Cute, fluffy, and funny

look at the wonderful mess we made, we pick ourselves undone by likelightninginabottle

In which the supernatural does not exist. But Beacon Hills still went through a war, of which this is the aftermath. Liam and Theo pine for each other, but Liam thinks he cannot have Theo and so he dates other people. And yes. They are roommates. Mutual Pining, Jealousy, Misunderstandings.

your slightest look easily will unclose me by likelightninginabottle

Liam thinks about the people who left and how he is almost alright without them. Post-Canon.

just steps across the tower bridge by eneiryu

Guilt, injury, angst–Theo’s body is failing, and he’s hiding it from Liam. Happy Ending.

Use and abuse me ‘til I’m gone by THENINTH09

5 times Liam makes Theo bleed and the one time (two times) he doesn’t.

don’t you hear me howling, babe? by THENINTH09

Theo and Liam in Theo’s truck, after Gabe and the hospital. NSFW

Iron and Copper by TheOceanIsMyInkwell

Or: A witch grants Theo's wish to turn human for a day and be loved for who he is. Liam shows him just what that wish might look like.

drove him underground by justt_ppeachy

Liam and Theo, but they are Orpheus & Eurydice retold. It always ends the same.

so cruelly you kissed me by wormhusk

A series of two one-shots, one with liam realizing his feelings for theo and the second on theo

this love is difficult, but it’s real by wormhusk

a two part series of oneshots with thiam secretly dating, liam telling the pack, it not going well, and the aftermath

all sunny days are on by wormhusk

Remember the hunger games au? This is an alice in borderland au. A lot of people will die but not thiam. incomplete

the smell of smoke would hang around this long by wormhusk

theo quits smoking 

and in ever crowd, it's you i'm looking for by fallingforboys

in which theo is unfortunately very attractive and needs a fake boyfriend at a party--and oh look, liam is right there

Thiam Fics That Are Part of This One Orphaned Series So I Have Put Them Together 

this is why they shouldn’t kill off the main guy by wormhusk

 a first-kiss fic with theo angst and liam bullying theo into staying with him instead of his truck

and i remember thinking by wormhusk

a fic exploring the theo train track theory AKA where they talk about a past suicide attempt

Oh i love it and i hate it at the same time

Established Thiam, Theo gets his wisdom teeth removed.

256,000

The one where Liam calculates how many times Theo died down in Hell and has a panic attack.

cut it out then restart by wormhusk

Theo has a bad day and gives into old habits. Angst. Self-harm

argumentative antithetical dream girl 

it’s a pwp but I'm including it because it's the same ‘verse

i just wanna stay in that lavender haze by wormhusk

thiam get high and and play the 36 questions that lead to love and then have sex about it

and i wouldn’t marry me either

Liam has a plan to propose to his boyfriend. Theo thinks Liam is acting cagey

fighting in only your army

The skinwalkers want Theo back. No one reacts well.

are there still beautiful things

a witch’s curse makes Liam hate the one he loves most–his fiance. Angst.

i know my pain is such an imposition 

the boys finally get to go on their honeymoon. so of course it goes wrong.

long live the look on your face by wormhusk

Theo and Liam go to build-a-bear

he was sunshine i was midnight rain by wormhusk

Liam does a 30-day love challenge

Sceo

Shall I sleep within your bed by voices_in_my_head

In which Theo wasn't expecting to be rescued

fake my heart by LuthienKenobi

In which Theo is captured and a femme fatale all in one

gonna make you a believer by queerebrum

in which the battle is over, the Anuk Ite defeated, and Scott McCall can finally see things clearly–things like how he has been pretending he is not in love with Theo Raeken

Expelliaramus! by tabbytabbytabby

Gryffindor Scott and Slytherin Theo are secretly dating.

Sons of Monsters and Monster Sons by TheOceanIsMyInkwell

“i think,” theo says slowly, “my father tried to kill me when i was seven.” Sceo+Thiam, bc Theo is terribly in love with them both. Child Abuse Mention, as well as Mentions of sexual assault done to Theo by his Father. Theo did NOT have a happy loving childhood.

Unbreakable Heaven by tabbytabbytabby

Theo thinks he and Scott are FWBs while Scott thinks they are dating. Theo starts pulling away once he realizes he has feelings for Scott. Scott wonders what he did to make his boyfriend distant.

our hands dirtied by the other’s desire; i will declare my love with a slaughter by clementinecalls

When they lay in the grass and stare at the stars, Scott runs his thumb over Theo’s wrist. Feeling his pulse steady under his touch. He thinks about the sun in comparison to Theo. He thinks about how he was Icarus and he loved Theo just as he loved the sun — too close, too much.

Homeless Theo/Theo + Pack

Too Afraid to Follow Through by dangerouscoffeetheorist

for your melissa & theo needs, and theo being forced to join the pack against his will. 

wither under the iridescent glow of the sun, moon, and stars by fallingforboys

Theo digs the bullets out himself, using them to cauterize the wounds, and the air around him becomes hot and a little sticky with the smell of his flesh burning, but he ignores it.

He ignores it and saves himself, because that’s all he knows how to do. He saves himself because he knows that no one else would bother trying. (He’s wrong.) Thiam but mostly pack focused

Heart coming up my throat, think I’m getting worse at breathing by Multifandom_damnnation 

Jordan Parrish & Theo. Thiam

murphy’s golden rule: whoever has the gold makes the law by game_ender

Coach Finstock & Theo. In which Theo gets adopted by the Coach. Thiam

Vanlife Style! by onyxthroughtheages

In which Alec and Theo are bffs, Theo was raised in the sewers and so learns about TikTok scandals and instafame through Google, and mentions Liam in almost every TikTok he ever makes.

built a ship in the morning but the hull’s worn through by eneiryu

in which theo makes a deal with the pack: after Monroe, he gets to walk away. Thiam

waves on the ocean for the wavering kind by eneiryu

a two parter series. part one is where Theo leaves Beacon Hills with exactly the same things he came into it with: his truck, a duffel bag full of clothes, and the permanent taste of blood and grave dirt in his mouth. part two is argent’s pov. thiam

Fics That Deserve a Category of Their Own

You only feel one emotion at a time by likelightninginabottle

Theo doesn't feel pain. It makes him reckless. The pack doesn't notice, until they do. Incomplete. Pack Dynamics. Thiam. Theo’s Past, Theo’s Present, and Hopefully, Theo’s Future.

Take my heart (and put it somewhere safe) by not_carrying_on

​​The one where Theo reluctantly helps the pack capture Monroe, deals with the aftermath of his upbringing with the Dread Doctors, saves the lives of not so few people (despite the will to deny it until his dying breath), practically adopts Alec and pulls his head out of his ass.

[sukunas-play-thing]

Birthday Kisses and Cake

Sabo x Oc

my birthday is today, and im feeling a little at my lowest, so this is mostly self comfort and self indulgent. Feel free to read if you like regardless. slight dark themes, hurt/comfort, mentions of death, it's OC based, but you can read it as reader if you want Thank you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this also includes a little bit of Gravity Falls sprinkled in there, mostly bc I'm a sucker for multiverse work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Birthday Kisses and Cake (Sabo x Selim)

she woke in a good enough mood, she had well rested rest with Sabo next to her. She knows she did, she didn't fall asleep upset.

The night before, was spent watching her best friend play the newest game release, Sun Wukang, before she had taken a break to check on her lover, Lindberg. Leaving Sabo and Selim alone to chat about anything and everything, Sabo had found Selim's criminal record she had gained during a summer vacation one year with distant family, and Sabo spent most of the time reading them off, laughing, and asking her what half of them meant, or what on earth prompted half her arrests. She'd laugh, explain things.

"Sweetheart, you've gotten 32 counts of murder!?." Sabo gasped looking at the paper in his hands, he lays on his back on the bed, Selim, tucked under his arm with his arm wrapped around her waist to pull her closer. She groans as she hides her face in his chest. "I told that officer Durley, they were zombies! No one believes me!." She would say.

Sabo couldn't help but laugh at this, rolling his eyes. He never realized the women was such a criminal, nonetheless. "Okay..um..what's "pug trafficking" ?." He asks her as his eyebrow raises. Selim was quick to respond with her ppunter finger up. "That. Was all Grunkle Stan! I had nothing to do with that!." She says, oh so matter of factly. Sabo let out a hearty laugh.

He liked her crazy shenanigans. It reminded him of simpler times, when he was younger, and spent his childhood time with Luffy and Ace, she reminded him a little of the two. Her hot headed and aggressiveness similar to Ace, to her bright and happy smile like Luffy's. Sabo felt warm, whole, contented in this very moment. He threw the papers on the ottoman by her bed, and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to his chest, hugging her so tight she'd groan in protest. But he ignored it. He placed sweet kisses to her head, before he'd mumble, "You know what tomorrow is?." He asked her, She hummed in response before she began naming off possible scenarios, holidays etc.

"Umm…. memorial day?." Sabo shakes his head, she pouts. "It's not your birthday… That was in March…" She mumbles to herself, Sabo chuckles. "It's not our anniversary… is it!?." She's quick to panic at the notion that she had forgotten, Sabo was quick to comfort her. "No darling, think harder." He simply says, as he softly pokes her nose. She scrunches her face in mock annoyance, before thinking to herself again.

"Is it Luffy's birthday???." She asks. Wrong, she's so cute when she's clueless, or forgets things, especially like days like her birthday.

He shakes his head and sighs, playfully rousing her hair. She slaps him. "Get some sleep darling…We have a long day tomorrow." Is all he says, she goes to say something but Sabo's soft smile, and his finger to his lips in a gesture of silence, stops her. she pouts again, nuzzling to his side, and finally falling asleep.

She slept good, she did, she had a good night.

So why does she feel this way? This feeling of inadequacy?

Low, sad and broken?. She turns to her side, seeing Sabo had already gotten up for the day.

She sighs and plops herself down on the bed again she feels heavy like weight sitting on her chest. Refusing to let her move. She groans at this and forces herself off the bed, rolling to the side. She reaches for a cigarette. She's out. She sighs before getting up to find herself some caffeine. Only to open the fridge and see she has no more monster. She slams the fridge shut. She walks back to her room to get dressed, She'll just walk to the store real quick. No biggy!

She gets to the store, grabs three cold cans, and then heads to the counter to get some smokes for herself and her friend. "I need to see some ID." The clerk asks, rather rudely, in Selim's opinion, but she ignores it and realizes quickly. She didn't grab her ID. She groans and tells the clerk to just scan the drinks, please. Selim walks back home, the sky is cloudy, bleak, and a little bit of a sprinkle of rain begins. She whimpers. She makes it back to the house, grabs her ID, and storms back to the store. gets them finally, and walks back home. By now, she's sweaty and a little cold from the soft patters of rain hitting her seething body. When she gets back home. She goes straight to her room, and anger boils down to a deep depression. 'Ah, so it's gonna be like that.' She'd think to herself as she sits down, she's been wanting to get back into writing again, Similar to Sabo, he inspired her to want to write a book about her life, the people that's impacted her. But words aren't wording. And she groans annoyed yet again and walks away from her project.

She sighs, lighting the lighter that won't work so she throws the lighter and sits there in silence for a moment. She takes deep, even breaths to control her rising anger and frustration. Her den den mushy rings, and she leans over to grab the receiver. 'Cuhlick.' The sound emanates.

"Hey Sissy!!!." It's her twin brother, Elliott. "Hey Bubba." She says softly, feeling a little calmer now. "Happy Birthday." He says, and it finally hits her, 'Ah, that's what Sabo's behavior was about last night.' She muses to herself. She shakes her head in deep thought. Her silence muses her brother, as he chuckles on the other end.

"You forgot, didn't you?." He says, a slight tease to his tone. They talk a moment. Luffys voice is on the other end, demanding he speak to her. "HEY MILLIE HAPPY BIRTHDAY." Luffy hollers. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DUDE BROOOO. I hope you have a SUUUUUUPER BIRTHDAY." That was Franky. She can see in her head the commotion Elliott must be surrounded in. Everyone crowding him and yelling in his ear. All the strawhats wishing her a happy birthday, wishing they were there today. Luffy asks to tell her he said hello to Sabo when she sees him again. Selim nods. When things die down. It's when Elliotts tone changes to a somber one. "Hey, um, by the way. I found a voice recording from our late friend and crew mate, it's for you. He sent it Before he died and im just now finding it.." Elliott speaks. Before sending selim the voice recording. She opens it up, says thank you to her brother, and hangs up. She curls into herself as the voice recording plays.

Voice recording:

"Hey, kiddo, it's me. Ches, Listen, I heard you've been having a bad day today. And I just wanted to say that I am proud of you. I know sometimes life can be hard, it can be really hard. But just know this, you're stronger than you give yourself credit for. And to always be kinder to yourself. You have an amazing brother who'd do anything for you. A bestie whose your ride or die. And your brothers crew and me. Who'd give you the whole world. Always think of the good things life has given to you. Always remember how far you've come, regardless of how hard it was to be on this earth you still shined bright. Still got up in the mornings to tackle the day. And still has a heart full of love. So. Please, go take a hot shower, put on your favorite clothes, make your room dark, put on your favorite show or movie. And remember, that you are number one. Thank you for being in our lives. See ya later, kiddo! "

Selim didn't realize that she had been crying. Hot tears fell from her face to her knees. She missed him so much. And every day, she's grateful to being on this earth because of him. Hearing his voice was weird, considering he'd been dead for two years. He fought his battle and lost, and here he was, still encouraging her to keep going herself. It was the hardest bit of reality she's ever faced. She broke down. Sobbing uncontrollably when her bedroom door opened. Sabo had returned from running errands with Lindbergh and selims best friend. Seeing her in this state caused Sabo to drop everything and rush to her side. Checking her to see if she was hurt physically. Only to see she wasn't.

This pain was emotional. So he did what he knows best. He wrapped her in his arms and held her so tightly. In his signature, bone crushing hugs. He let her cry. Let her cry all of what she felt out. Closing his eyes and choking back his own sobs. He hated seeing her this way. Seeing her cry made him cry. Even though he wanted to be strong for her above all else. But she's taught him to be vulnerable when it was just him and her. And so he did. When she calmed down. He asked what was wrong. To which she told him she received the voicemail she had never gotten until now. Sabo knew of their old crew mate. They talked about him often. How kind he was, how selfless he was. And how it tore their crew up when he passed. He understood loss all too well. He fixes her hair. Wipes her tears. He holds her hands in his gloved ones.

"Darling... I want you.. to have the best birthday ever, let's get you cleaned up. Me, you. Lindbergh and your friend are all going out for your birthday. I, want you to know. We're happy you're here. Happy birthday sweetheart. The most very special lady I've ever met."

She swooned at how sweet and thoughtful Sabo can be. She shakes her head, thinking she couldn't be presentable. But Sabo disagrees. He helps her up, indirectly giving her the strength she needed to move again. His strong arms hold her upright, his strong legs, helped her walk, his strong hands wiped her tears, and his sturdy chest grounds her. He grounds her.

He helps her get cleaned up. He helps her get dried off, She fixes her hair. And dots her lips with a soft color tint. She picks out her outfit and sprays her favorite perfume. Her friend and Lindbergh are waiting in the living room when Sabo and Selim emerge together. She wears soft colors and a beautiful shawl Sabo bought for her birthday today. A dark blue laced color that matched her dress wonderfully. The four set out for the day to have lunch and then to walk along a beach shore. They call the strawhats and her brother back, and they all sing happy birthday to her as she hides her face bashfully. The sun begins to set. And they go out to dance. The lights and music soothe her weary soul. Sabo looks absolutely handsome in his blue black suit. He kisses her full of love and adoration as the song ends. And when they walk back to the house. They are greeted with the entire revolutionary army members. All with their own, specially wrapped presents, just for her. Ivankov made a beautiful pink and purple cake. With 27 birthday candles on it, with the words; "Happy Birthday, Millie!"

Gracing the decorated treat. They all sang happy birthday. Selims a giggling mess as Sabo sways side to side with his arm wrapped around her. His voice, a soothing balm, calming her tumultuous waves of pain and anxiety, and washing it all away with just a simple look. His charming smile, makes her heart flutter. She wraps her arms around him as he places many kisses on her face as the song concludes. Everyone's clapping and cheering. And when it was time to blow out her candles. She thinks for a moment.

There's nothing to wish for. She has her friends, all here. Her brother is alive and well and with the strawhats. Luffys is happy, her friend is happy. And Sabo, sweet, caring, funny, darling Sabo. Is right here with her. Her whole world was crashing down when she met him. And he's slowly building her pieces back together again. Even if he doesn't realize it. She smiles and kisses his chest. And blows out her candles. Everyone cheers and claps again. Before music begins to play.

"Thank you, everyone."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm sorry this was sad. I don't know why I'm feeling sad hut here we are. Thank you so much for reading. Have a lovely day/night mootisies.

[gabessquishytum]

Okay okay so i know i JUST sent that pervy hob creeping on waiter dream ask but i came up w more bc im not well.

Dream doesnt want anyone but his supervisor Lucienne to know hes Morpheus Endless bc hes 19 and everything is a catastrophic level of embarrassment at the age of 19 also hes afraid he might get picked on or hazed or something. Hes shy and most of the summer employees are his age but everyone is either nice or neutral but not mean. He gets invited to a few staff bonfires and kinda sits at the edge and keeps to himself bc hes never done this or been allowed to have friends before but its pleasant and sometimes someone will come over and make small talk to help him feel included. The Corinthian is a poolboy, he makes jokes about it constantly saying how hes trying to have as much gay sex as possible and being poolboy seemed the best bet. Hes charming and isnt weird about dream being sorta gender neutral/fluid and dream Likes him. The Corinthian saw hob slap dreams ass that first time and matthew told dream he had to physically hold the Corinthian back so he didn't go beat a guest up. Dream sits with the Corinthian on the dock and thanks him for his gallantry and the Corinthian is shy being alone w him all like "well,, i didnt do it for anything other than selfish reasons im hoping to get some nepo points when you go back home" and dream is all shook and worried now but the Corinthian laughs like "yeah you should've chose a different nickname if you didnt want to be associated with the god of SLEEP" but he doesn't tell anyone and even catches on to dreams vague rambling explanations of being Into hob which he only teases him a LITLLE for which is very generous in his opinion. Things get hot and heavy in both directions and its a proper YA summer romance love triangle. The Corinthian is kinda worried when dream texts him to come to hobs suite but hes kinda looking to get into it w this asshole anyway but when he shows up its hob who answers and dream is a blushy blissed out mess in the sheets and hob explains how dream was going to go to the Corinthian first and now hob wants to see what the Corinthian would have done to his darling now that his virginity is already taken now:) they have a really hot really psychosexual threesome and dream gets to take both of them in one night and go to bed pressed up between them❤️

-🔪

AHH yeah here's a link to the last resort au we talked about.

I always love the idea of Hob and Cori competing over Dream, and this is a really nice way for it happen. The love triangle is so tense and sexy.

Hob is still giving all his attention to Dream - flirting, touching, teasing him all day long. But there are moments when Dream actually has to do his job for half a moment instead of just being a toy for Hob to enjoy. When Dream is off folding towels or helping in the dining room, Hob takes the opportunity to pounce on Cori.

And Cori doesn't just accept it like Dream does. He calls Hob a dirty old man, threatens to report him, even holds the knife he was using to slice fruit to Hob’s throat at one point. Mostly its because he doesn't want to steal Dream’s man when he knows there's feelings there. But also, he's really enjoying the thrill of the chase.

So when he's invited to Hob’s suite, it's fair to say that the sexual tension is heavy. Cori pretends to be all focused on Dream (and he is!! Absolutely thrilled to get between Dream’s legs finally) but he's glancing at Hob the whole time, daring him to do something. Hob is only too happy to oblige.

Cori finally gets to fuck Dream (having Hob’s sloppy seconds is more of turn on than he'll ever admit). All while Hob tongue-fucks Cori's hole. Cori has never been rimmed like that before and he has to admit that Hob is talented. He barely lasts any time before coming inside Dream, but he can't even begin to care. This is the gay sex he was hoping for.

Cori is definitely getting those nepo points for making Dream cum. And don't tell anyone, but he totally sucked Hob’s dick. He had to do something to make sure that he's invited back for more!!

[edge-oftheworld]

Im bored so go ahead and psychoanalyze me. Lukes lane btw (tied between him and michael but i saw you already did someone with michael and lukes almost exactly tied). Go ahead and look at my blog if you want but its mostly reblogs.

ooh I didn't realise this would get so popular! I'll go with your tie bc I like to try do it as authentically as possible. just taking a little bit to get my bearings and my head out of You're In Your Midtwenties

I can see the muke fan in you, your blog gives off enthusiasm and excitement and ambition, maybe not the kind of ambition people usually think of but you know what you love and you're passionate about and you're very self-motivated about it. you love making things fun and that's a strategy that's going to serve you forever--no task is boring with you, because with the power of friendship and creativity you know how to make it into a game or a fun adventure and that's gonna make everything a lot more doable, and a lot less tiring throughout your life. some people are going to judge you for that, but more and more you're realising that your true friends appreciate it and admire it about you, as they should!

you have acquaintances who think you're cool and wish they could be part of the fun productivity. you probably think they're really cool too, or maybe you're jealous of them (because as hard as you try to be confident you do get insecure sometimes). but if you said hi to them you would be great friends! (case in point: muke). so don't be afraid to make new friends, but also to appreciate the ones you have.

you love learning, but you also get overwhelmed sometimes and feel a little trapped when people say you have to do things a certain way. you have a lot of admiration for people who feel free to be themselves and you want to be them, sometimes you're scared though. as you grow older you'll have more and more chances to do things your own way and to live life how it makes you happy. it's not a contradiction that you can sometimes be really good at something but also need lots of time to rest and decompress after, it's quite common actually. it's natural: some people's brains are born to 'sprint' (do really well at something but only for short amounts of time) while some are 'marathon runners' (can keep going for long times but don't have as good or out there ideas nearly as often). you know yourself though, you're quite self aware even though you don't always tell people what's going on in your head. you're independent when it comes to being cared for by adults, but you love close friendships and community when it comes to your peers.

look after yourself and your self-esteem--though you love alone time too, you feel great when you're around your best friends but you start to beat yourself up easily when things are going wrong socially. learn that it's not your fault. whether or not you have it, you might enjoy looking at posts on adhd positivity or the few and far between positivity posts for the pda profile of autism. as to whether any of these things are you--you'll figure it out. you always do. you like a little puzzle. and you do want to accept yourself, to learn how to be kind to yourself, learn to rest even when people tell you to keep going but you need a break to feel like yourself again. and you can get there!

[jaxxsoxxn]

how do you think a boomerang and flash fight wouldve gone if the suicide squad were the ones brainwashed instesd of the justice league? frankly i just wanna hear how you think a brainiac!boomerang and flash would interact, youve got the BEST boomerflash headcanons i swear-

Henlo my sweet anon! Also, I just wanna say, the ego feeding is very nice lolol /lh

Also, compared to the wittiness of Brainiaced Flasher n Digger, I do think these two switched would be more on the angsty side.

Anyway:

It'd probably depend on if they were already dating, which amma make two versions of! Aka, if they'd already dated and if they had something that they didn't name (aka kinda on and off deal)

DATING:

Boomer, brainiaced, would be a force to recon with for Flash (im only half joking). I feel like the whole TFX probably got sent into the field by Waller, while the Justice League got held back as a "safety requirement". At first they thought that Suicide Squad was just bitching, but when the bombs weren't there AND Deadshot was the one that got out of the brainwashing for long enough to tell them what happened (why DS u might ask - obviously bc he loves his kid so much he'd rather kill himself instead of endangering her planet).

The whole Justice League (well, as whole as they were shown in the game lmao) gets separated and they have to fight their villains, now somewhat "mutated", one vs one. Flash is somewhat happy that no-one is there to witness it. His voice soft and breaking, while he tries his best to wake his lover up from this nightmare.

He knows there's no saving, he knows he has to kill him, but by Speedforce, he doesn't want to.

Do you think his hand would shake while he's landing his last blow? Do you think Boomer would wake up at the end, the pure fear showing in his eyes, while he trembles and cries, knowing that he woke up too late?

The fight wouldn't go as smoothly as it normally goes for Flash, Boomer not only with Speedforce but also knowing him well enough that he's practically instinctively Speedster-proof.

I imagine it would be a long fight, mostly because Flash would fight the fact that he has to end the other and because Boomer would absolutely spew some hurtful shit enough that it'd stop the other in his tracks.

Every blow done faster than a human eye can see, Flash dogging the goddamn boomerangs, while also trying to dodge the man himself.

The witty banter is defo one-sided, Barry already mourning the other.

If Hal would see him, he'd point out that it was exactly what he was worried about.

If we'll try the "happy ending route", with Boomer's fear for his life actually waking him up a second before he is in fatal condition, he and Barry cannot stay alone in one room for weeks after.

The speedster aches whenever he and Digger land alone somewhere, just to see the thief shake and curl in himself in fear, his mind remembering the pain and the taste of death on his tongue too well.

Barry's need to comfort Boomer vs Barry's need to accommodate Boomer, fight!

If he dies, Flash comes back to his teammates after a while, when/if they dealt with their own... issues, somehow knowing that he cannot afford to actually have a burial for his love. That if he doesn't want the heat that comes with dating a villain, he cannot bury the man who he wished to hold in his arms one more time.

I actually have a half-issue with this! Would he, knowing that it's too late to fix anyway, still put himself on blast like that? Knowing his history with Godspeed, probably! But it somehow doesn't seem to fit for me, huh.

IF HE WASN'T DATING DATING HIM:

He's so in denial. Gods bless.

Speedforce plus Boomer is a strong combo, I feel like he'd be a little more unpredictable since he'd be also pushed by the feeling of "not being enough" for Barry.

When Flash hears it in the chaotic mumble coming from Boomer, he's absolutely dumbstrucked.

Can you imagine if Kid Flash or Impulse are helping him at the moment? Or any other Flash fam members?

Their need to ask him "why tf is this Rouge calling you his bitch ex wife" dies down quickly, when the panicking apologies get practically torn out of the Speedster's throat.

He never meant to make the other feel like that, how could he not notice it?

Boomerang is hitting every sensitive spot of their relationship, or more lack of it. The words he says are from the darkness of his mind he would let himself slip into only while being so insecure that it hurts. This one is not coming back to us, even for the last second of his life.

"But before u said that he comes back out of fear for his life, why wouldn't he come back here?" Because he's not living the life that he'd think is worth it, c'mon, keep up ;)

Our lovely scarlet boy needs a BREAK after this fight. His shock lasted too long few times and Digger was so good at hitting where it hurts that he definitely stopped more than once.

Flash fam/Anyone else helps him get back on his legs, but they can't exactly navigate it - so they weren't in a relationship AND that's the issue?

Tho I'm sure few of them just kinda stop around him in understanding - they can't make it better, but they can make sure that he knows they're here for him.

Talking bout it, Godspeed (who I count as a part of Flash fam, fight me) does actually get it. He keeps close to the other while they fight for their world, making sure that Barry won't fall without there being anyone to catch him.

Can you let yourself mourn someone you wouldn't let yourself love?

ANyway, it went way more into the "what if they'd fight to death" than into "how would they interact", but well :'D

[loveariddle]

hii it’s very funny that most recent asks are from anons, everyone is so shy around you,, :3 👀

but also AAA HII omg i’m so sorry for spamming and for looking at like uo to 2018 stuff,, but OMG OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOGNDJCBDBD YPUR ART IS SO SO SO PRETTY HOW AM I ONLY FINDING YOU KNOW ITS ALL GORGEOUS YOURE SO TALANTED OH MY GOODNESS 💓💗💕💖💞💗💓💕💖 IM LITERALLY EATING ALL OF IT IM EATING YOUR ART IM CONSUMING IT AND I CAN FEEL ALL OF MY TASTEBUDS ACTIVATING AT ONCE BECAUSE YOUR ART YOUR CREATIONS ARE MASTERPIECES

😭 😭 it’s so beautiful genuinely, i love the softness, i love the genuine emotions, i love all of your scenes and i’m so so so happy for you for getting commissions i hope that supports you and i hope you accept all the love you receive cause you deserve it so much!!

from what i’ve seen you’re genuinely the sweetest person when interacting with everyone and i just want you to know how much you’ve probably meant for someone, i’m 100% sure (because that will be ME ONG) people go back to your blog and look at your art and it actually helps them feel better and keep going because it brings them so much happiness and means so much to them. that’s what you are able to do with your creations. i love your art and already love you :33

cant wait to see for more (including me going back down and down and down and down unless you mind then i’ll stop,,,,,)

sorry for the spam ask, please don’t forget to hydrate, eat something, open the window, go on a walk, message a loved one and have a awesome day! you’re so much worth than your creations alone, you’re a wonderful skilled human being and i hope you enjoy the rest of your year too! i’ll just be here,, lurking,,,, reblogging,,, eating your art,, 👁 👁

HII sorry i just had this in my inbox for a while bc i dont think i can give a proper response to match this energy shjs BUT THANK YOU... lately i just feel drained year by year and i mostly only have energy left to do paid work. i want to feel the motivation and enthusiasm back and wonder at times when i feel this way does it reflect on my art like.. did i lose the charm my audience followed me for.. i dont know but whenever i post new stuff i still get sweet responses so :') it keeps me going!! i /want/ people to feel happy when they look at my stuff! thank you for taking the time to write this out, i hope you'll have a wonderful day as well🥰🥰!

[etherealspacejelly]

ERM

ok so

anonymous bc no way am i showing my url on this Jhshsheheh

so like all my friends at school. they seem. so much more mature than i am???

like even the ones who are younger than me. they're already thinking about partners. and dating n stuff. like some of my friends already have partners

but i. just am not interested in that rn??? and sometimes i feel like there's. something Wrong with me. yk

like im year 9 but. i feel like i should be thinking about this and it feels like im not mature enough that i don't want to worry abt that now

- 🐉

there is nothing wrong with you. listen to me. there is absolutely Nothing wrong with you.

it is perfectly normal to not be interested in romantic relationships, i wasnt at your age and im still not. i am in a platonic relationship with my best friend, mostly because it comforts us both to know that no matter what happens we will not be alone. even if all of our other friends get into romantic relationships and prioritise them over friendships

desiring a romantic partner does not make you more mature than anyone else. having a romantic partner or a partner of any kind is not a requirement for happiness, fulfilment, or maturity.

focus on what You actually want. ask yourself what would make You happy, what would make you feel fulfilled and satisfied with your life. set aside these notions of what we are Supposed to want, of what it is ""Normal"" to want, and focus your attention on yourself. this is your life, and you owe it to yourself to follow your own path.

i think it would help you to research aspec identities, especially aromantic ones, and talk to aromantic people about their experiences. you might not be aromantic! alloromantic people can still have no desire to be in romantic relationships, and that is perfectly fine and normal. and likewise aromantic and arospec people can want to be in romantic relationships despite their lack of romantic attraction. what i think researching this community will do for you is show you that romance is not the be all and end all of human beings. it is not a requirement for existing and being happy.

i think even progressive parents can fall into this trap of telling their kids "when you grow up and get a girlfriend or a boyfriend" or "when you get married to your spouse", and like, yea its great that they arent assuming you will be straight, but they are still placing the expectation on you to Want a romantic relationship and that you will have one no matter what. and that doesnt have to be the case!

your "happily ever after" does Not have to involve riding off into the sunset with your One True Love, it can in fact be a freezeframe of you and your best friends jumping into the air together and pulling silly faces!

idk this is. a long and rambling answer to what was a fairly simple question but. this ask hit me very close to home. i know how you feel. i felt Exactly the same way when i was your age. i felt wrong and broken and different and i didnt understand Why everyone was so excited about dating and kissing and relationships. so. im telling you what i wish someone would have told me.

take a deep breath. and let go. you dont need to have it all figured out Right Now. you can in fact just enjoy life as it happens! you dont have to know exactly what you want at this age. you can figure it out as you go. you have So Much Life ahead of you to learn and grow make mistakes and change your mind and figure things out and just. live.

the world wont end if you never want a romantic relationship. life will go on. you will find out what Really matters to you. and thats the beauty of being alive! please do not force yourself to do anything you dont Really want to do, just because thats what it feels like you're Supposed to do.

you are unique and beautiful and so so alive. you are doing just fine, and im so proud of you. you belong here.

you are loved.

[p2ii]

HEHE OK!! Here's my current fic dumping:

Takes place like... Just after the cover story where NEO-MADS formed, semi-during Wano (though Wano events are p much irrelevant, its just a timeframe). Levely ig also going on which IS funny to me because. The fact that the one Levely we see is the very first one Germa doesn't get invited too is crazy. Vivi has probably met the Vinsmokes once. They would be as problematic and unhelpful as Wapol is.

ANYWAY! Germa is trying to restore itself after Whole Cake Island, and Caesar is specifically currently helping to restore labs and gather supplies for them.

Currently writing in 3rd person Yonji POV just... bc thats what I ended up doing, he's fun to write.

Ichiji is the main one who is kinda... off, after WCI. I read a good post pointing out how Ichiji was probably the one who decided to save his brothers, not Reiju (who mostly just sees them as machines) and I kinda ran with that idea. I have BIG interest in Ichiji being the first to break down, I mean, he's the most PERFECT and emotionless, and the next in line for king, so when he crumbles... what are the others supposed to do?

Though my main original idea here... Judge has that "Soldier Stock Depot". Judge is one of the only characters we know who knows how to clone, the other being Vegapunk himself (iirc). If his greatest experiment (as in, his literal CHILDREN whom he "lovingly" named 0 1 2 3 4) all end up failing him... his greatest failure being the main savior of the WCI incident... well. What's stopping Judge from starting all over, and cloning his little failures to make new ones?

A bad experiment is one with only one, maybe two trials. Maybe Judge even gets inspired after a non-serious, one-off comment from Caesar. Either way, its safe to say the cloning room is off-limits to the siblings again, for some inexplicable reason.

YAAAY :DDD!!!

I think it's so cool you're settting it after neo-mads formation cause I don't think I've read any other fics that include ceasers involvement with the vinsmokes. he's such a silly guy I can't wait to see what kinda chaos he will cause XDc

yonjis POV of post-wci... that's so interesting 👀 I've noticed for people tend to see him as the 'most emotional' of 124ji since he's explicitly silly and horny on-panel, that and being the youngest opens up alot of potential characterization for him! can't wait to see where you take him (also glad Ur having fun, I love when a character is just delight to invade the mind of)

i think I read that post before! there's something about him being the heir and also the emphasis on second OLDEST (because judge is a sexist prick) that puts him in such an interesting position. LOVE LOVE LOVE that your're going that direction w him it's one of my favourite kinda of plotlines for them.

I mean, he's the most PERFECT and emotionless, and the next in line for king, so when he crumbles… what are the others supposed to do?

THIS OMG... my heart </3 you are so right like. everything just crumbles. reiju doesn't care for 24ji like that and judge is their obvious abuser, all they really have is each other and this strict hierarchy they live by 😭.

clone angst... clone angt smy beloved...

Either way, its safe to say the cloning room is off-limits to the siblings again, for some inexplicable reason.

THE MYSTERY AND HORROR PF IT ALL TOO IM DYING. bro if I wasn't already hooked this got me. the angst and suspense alone wow.

just know I'm hyping you every step of the way with this dude Ur mind... happy writing!!!

[altschmerzes]

Hey you don’t have to answer this obvs if it’s something you don’t want to share/talk about but I’m curious how did you meet your wife/navigate getting married in an aromantic way? I kinda feel like I might be aro and I’m getting older and feeling like. I want a partner and I don’t want to be alone but I don’t know if I really feel romantic love, and I just feel kinda hopeless about finding that, but it’s nice knowing there are people who do find it.

absolutely, yeah!!! i love to talk about my relationship honestly, for a lot of reasons (it makes me feel very happy and warm inside, and i love to talk about this wonderful thing i have in my life with this wonderful person, i am a Wife Guy for real) but also for exactly this reason too - bc i don't think a lot of people know that what we have, what we're doing, is an option. or if they do think of it, they don't think it's realistic or something that can actually happen.

i spent a long time thinking that what i wanted, the thing that would actually make me happy, that i daydreamed about just... it was a nice thought but the odds that i would be able to actually have it were so low that it didn't warrant thinking about at all. i wanted a partner, someone i could live with and raise kids with and build a life together with, and i wanted it completely platonically. i didn't want romance and i didn't want sex either but i did want intimacy, emotionally and physically. i assumed this would only be possible with another aro(ace) person, because i didn't think anyone who wasn't aroace would want that, or that it would be like. unfair somehow, or asking someone to give enormous things up to be with me. (this was all a bunch of jumping to assumptions and internalized bullshit, btw. my fiancee is a lesbian and is just as happy as i am, wants our marriage and our life together, exactly the way that it is, just as much as i do - and has been extremely patient and kind in reassuring me of this.)

(haha this got long again, it usually seems to when i'm talking about My Aro Experience and relationships and em sldj. further under the cut-)

and then it was like, well, i already have no idea how i'd meet another aroace person irl, and even then i have no idea if we'd be compatible. if we'd have the same values and vision for our lives. if they'd want kids. if they'd be comfortable with the kind of physical affection i really wanted to engage in. etc. so i just kind of told myself that y'know, it would have been nice if i had the option of not being alone, but i didn't, so i had to just get used to it. (and it is perfectly fine if someone wants to be alone. that's great. that's a huge thing the aro community is fighting for all of the time. but i did not want that. i just thought it was the only choice i had, if i wasn't willing to force myself into a romantic and probably sexual relationship i didn't want.

my wife and i actually met quite a while back, when we were like. sixteen or so, online. we've been friends for a really long time. which is why when im asked how long we've been together by people who don't know our relationship is platonic, or that i'm aro, or whatever, i have a hard time answering it XD. because like, our engagement was the first we'd ever decided to Be In A RelationshipTM, but if you think about it as a progression of the same relationship we've always had, just as dating before an engagement would be, we've been together for like. coming up on close to ten years.

figuring out navigating our relationship has been a little difficult at times but mostly it's been absolutely wonderful. difficult mostly in the sense that there's no script for this, nothing set out that tells us this is what a relationship like ours is supposed to look like, or usually looks like. we've had to figure it out ourselves. but also that's one of the things that's really been wonderful about it. we can decide at every single point what it is we want, what it is that'll make us happy.

like - at first we decided to have separate bedrooms when we moved in together after we finished our respective degrees/got married/got immigration all sorted out. and then after sharing one when we went to my hometown to introduce em to my family we were like. well. we were fools, huh. so, turns out we're sharing a bedroom. (and i'm... really happy with that, particularly, because it turns out i sleep really well when em and i are together. i used to write a lot about characters sleeping in the same bed, cuddling, etc, and i still do, but i always sort of assumed it was completely obvious i had no idea what i was talking about bc it couldn't possibly be the way i described it. and now that i've been there, it's better.)

the rest of the world is a little trickier, haha. it's a little weird and bad sometimes that people are constantly assuming i'm in a romantic relationship, tbh. even in the aro community i see a lot of people talking like the only people around are nonpartnering/single or in romantic relationships. and the rest of the world, people who don't know i'm aro or who do but like.... forget that a lot? or assume it's changed or doesn't matter or something? is kind of exhausting and uncomfortable. for the most part, we don't bother explaining the nature of our relationship to people. this is also something we talked about! we discussed how much we wanted to clarify or contextualize, and decided that ultimately like... with the exception of people we're very close to, and in contexts like this (fairly anonymous post on ye olde internet with the ability to immediately block anyone who clowns on it), it's really nobody's business unless we decide it is and we're cool with just letting people assume whatever. that doesn't mean it doesn't suck sometimes, but it's a calculus i've made and we've made together.

anyways, just. there you have it!!! i trust my fiancee and i love them and they love me and our greatest priority is always making sure the other person feels safe and loved and respected. and i feel that in every conversation we have. it's a unique situation and we've had to figure a lot of things out along the way, and that's included a lot of conversations i just don't know how to have, but we've figured it out together. i felt hopeless for a really long time, too. i wish i could go back and tell myself in the past where i'd end up. and that's part of why i keep talking about it so much and so openly, so that people know they don't have to just... there are options, y'know? options for going after what you want and talking about what you want with anyone in your life who you have a significant relationship with. i could've cheated myself out of the best thing that's ever happened to me by assuming it just wasn't possible. i'm so glad that i didn't.

[roylustang]

hiiiii HIIII I loved your response and I was so very compelled by your ideas about why keith finds being dirty comforting and it seized me with the thought about how the castle is so Clean and Pristine. and I was thinking about your post about how the Dirt becomes part of you & your environment and I was like ohhh Keith’s shack was probably sooooo fucking dirty and then he gets this castle room that’s sleek white metal and clean nnnn and I think that is extremely unsettling. also also I see your thoughts about keith associating dirtiness with Importance and I would love to add: he was also dirty all the time during a time in his life where there was nobody around. I think for keith “peace & quiet” and “loneliness” are very intertwined (I hc he got bullied a lot at the garrison so while he found so much love in his relationship with shiro he also struggled a lot.) So the desert is this horrible grief but also this profound emptiness and not having anybody to impress or interact with. which I think is in a way comforting. the image of him coming back to the castle covered in dirt and blood and just sitting down in the lounge like that while everyone scrambles to shower is so vivid

also PLEASE tell me about your daddy kogane thoughts you can’t just bait me like that and not tell me. also you are so entirely right. Our combined power can turn keith into the saddest wettest rat ever. The keith suffering between us is powerful . I need to do my job now but yeah thanks for sharing

IM GOING INSAAAANNEEE okay okay okay i guess i mainly have two major thoughts about this.

The first is what you said about peace & quiet and loneliness. Highly believe Keith was getting bullied in the garrison (and even if it wasn’t bullying we all know he had beef with a lot of people/people had a lot of beef with him. He’s not a people person, obviously. He much prefers to be by himself because it’s safer and less stressful). So if we assume then that Keith is happier when there’s peace & quiet that means Keith probably also associates loneliness with happiness which FUCKS ME UP. And I can totally see how this would make his relationship with shiro more difficult, especially in the beginning. But mostly I’m dying thinking about the fact that, grief notwithstanding, Keith ultimately /believes/ he is happier in his lonely shack of sadness (whether or not he actually is). But I also think you’re definitely right that he takes comfort from the idea that there’s no one around to impress or put on an act for. There’s no pressure on him to perform (whether that be as a pilot or just as a normal human being, moreso the latter esp if we’re taking your hc’s into account) WHICH IS IMPORTANT because living like this, Keith feels less encumbered. He feels, perhaps, that living like this (constantly in the desert, constantly in the DIRT, constantly alone) is where he Belongs. This is arguably the most ideal living situation he’s ever been in, at least when there’s no one around to care about him (which has been the majority of his life).

Which leads me to my second thought that not only is suddenly being forced into the immaculate castle with all its sleek and clean furnishings unsettling, it is also signaling to Keith that this is a place where he does Not Belong. This is a place where he will have to continue to put up some kind of facade, especially considering he’s now living with 5 practical strangers (excluding Shiro), one of whom already seems to dislike him for no reason, like most people. And not only that, but especially in the first few days/weeks that they’re living there, Keith is constantly getting things dirty just by existing, which is very hard on him mentally bc it just makes him feel like he’s ruining everything. Because he Doesn’t Belong here in this nice clean place. He is once again a fish out of water.

[weezeryuri]

i dont have much experience w emotional stuff i wish i could physically help you. if i had a good job and my own place i would literally fly out and pick you up and take you with me and we could be weird gay roommates im being 100% genuine. there are a lot of physical therapy exercises that can be done from bed, i could explain my own routine if you want (i found it overwhelming when i just looked up vague terms) (but i dont remember most of the exercise names so ive just got weird descriptions sorry </3). i wish i could take you out to the mall to sit on a bench for extended periods of time and look around at stuff and buy snacks from the grocery store for lunch instead of going to a restaurant bc its cheaper.

ive seen a couple other ppl say "i totally relate" w a major misunderstanding of your actual situation so idk i dont want to feel like Another random anon who doesnt Actually get it. but like for example ive never seen anyone other than you understand that long distance relationships and internet friendships dont rlly make up for the genuine isolation of being mostly housebound and agoraphobic. you make me feel like im not alone.

i hope you feel better in the morning. i love you i love you i love you

anon i am clasping our hands together so sincerely and lovingly and hugging you so tight it knocks the breath out of you a little. this is one of the sweetest messages i’ve ever gotten and i am so grateful to hear such a kind thing

don’t worry about the exercise stuff i’m already doing everything i can do with daily stretches and stuff it just hasn’t done much to reassure me. i’m also seeing a doctor but the progress is so slow and my next appointment isn’t until after my birthday and it has me pulling my hair out

lately i’ve been thinking about taking the money i got from my dad’s life insurance when he passed away and somehow put it towards funding a way out but lack of adult skills and experience has me clueless on where to even start with it all

you are always welcome to message me off anon and maybe we can maybe talk a plan out or even just chat for the sake of hanging out w someone you can relate to. im more than happy to keep each other company especially if you relate to me as much as you say

i love you dearly as well and again i am so grateful to hear something so kind. i hope things get better someway somehow <3

[dayurno]

more than a woman is the ultimate kevin day song to me……. im so glad you agree…… i knew you would understand. i was listening to that playlist the other day and realized i HADNT added it yet and it felt like an oversight so i had to fix it immediately. it was very important to me the whole playlist wasn’t sad. i stsrted my kevin playlist in the height of me losing my mind about him last year in july (i read the books for the first time at the end of may!) but it only made me crazier so i held off making the jean one until november LOL. his is def a little more sad but i think a good portion of the songs are hopeful :-) and YEAH jean is soooo hozier to me. i gave myself a limit on how many hozier songs i could add. it will probably be broken eventually

UR PINTEREST BOARD that fic is going to kill me. im so excited every time you share something about it…. the dynamics seem so fun ^-^ also the richard siken tweet in there Took me Out. i own and have read crush by him so many times like it’s such a big part of who i am and relating that to kerejean makes me. sbdjebx. sweating. nauseous. so excited. the vibes are so good, it feels very nostalgic and warm already….. btw your jean playlist hit me over the head and gave me a.Concussion. i wanna get better???!?! under the table???? OOM SHA LA LA? that song changed my brain chemistry like three years ago and im going to associate it with him forever now. your kevjean playlist being so long is so very real too….. i need to sit down and listen to the full nine hours of it.

DBSIDBSID. the kandrew beef is Personal and it’s so funny. i am working on making them get closer it just takes a lot of time bc andrew simply does not like to stick around. he comes to a sort of truce with them at some point, mostly after he and jean have a Talk alone, but he still doesn’t like kevin for a while. there IS side andreil tho…. neil is 26 :3 he comes to visit kevjean in paris for a bit and immediately causes problems. but the problems help them get their shit together so it’s fine! andrew is of course intrigued. most of it happens in the background tho bc they like to disappear together…… but neil actually ends up in foster care and gets adopted by wymack when he’s around 13, which is around the same age andrew is adopted and meets jeremy, so they understand each other still :) they do a lot of sneaking around and do not want their relationship perceived at all vs jeremy knox head of the PDA committee and very happy for his own friend finding love.

the biting…….. jeremy falls somewhere in the middle of the spectrum but he does suffer from the most intense feelings of love anyone has ever felt and will latch on like a dog and not let go sometimes. it really depends on his mood and what they’re doing how hard he bites ^-^ jean almost never complains but kevin always does. as is how they are. and they really both love attacking kevin. sitting there biting at his neck and shoulders and jean in particular likes gnawing on the wrist bone. jeremy is only a few inches shorter than kevin but will not hesitate to push him around….. dreamy sigh. at first he’s very nervous about overstepping Anything around either of them but once he knows that they actually like him he becomes such a menace. it’s his life’s duty to make kevin day, his childhood celebrity crush, a little embarrassed and whiny. both he and jean are soooo happy to tease kevin and kevin complains constantly about being ganged up on. jeremy is actually still IN college too, he turns 23 toward the beginning of the fic (i. hc him as a cancer!) and he and andrew have their fifth year to get through so he’s really just some college kid nibbling on and picking on them and taking over their apartment. trust that jean gets teased too he wouldn’t want anyone left out!

JEANFO….. jean….. my apple strudel….. there is so much i could say about him but it feels hard to do him justice…… he really is so special. he’s a little more healed of course bc he’s 28 and has always had kevin keeping contact with him. kevin got out at 14 so jean was there for 6 years without him and it’s really. it’s not a good time for him. but kevin refuses to lose contact and even sneaks across state lines to see him at 16 when he gets his license (with 14yo neil). jean has always had something to hold onto and live for. so jean is doing okay……. he still struggles and he’s very stubborn so he would rather AVOID things and kevin isn’t the kind of person who’s going to push him to face them (kevin has his own things to avoid) but he gets a good push from jeremy. and he LOVESSSS keremy. it’s one of his greatest joys that the two people he loves most care about each other the way they do. he’s so obsessed with them and so excited to show them off when they get together with friends. he’s really a little bit of a clingy freak :-) ESPECIALLY if he gets drunk. he’s a very needy drunk and if someone doesn’t kiss him (or if he doesn’t get to bite) his whole night is ruined and they certainly can’t have that. he learns quickly he cannot keep up with jeremy Party Boy knox tho. he’s a silly guy <3 sooo bitchy to everyone outside of his boyfriends but tender with them…. they’re trusted with his girlish little heart. i could talk about him for ages but i fear tumblr will cut me off LOL our responses to each other are getting so long like we’re writing letters by candlelight to be sent post-haste…..

HELLO MY LOVE im sorry for the late reply my pc was out of commission and answering asks on mobile is terrible but i am back now as your penpal. I LOVED MORE THAN A WOMAN OFC i understand i think i've had so many kevin day playlists since i first read aftg in 2020 (which feels like such a lifetime ago!), so i try not to keep too much track of them and not to take them or myself too seriously either. in a way all the playlists i've made have been an abstract of my life at the time of making so i want to preserve them that way! which is why my kandrew playlist is 6 hours long. because i am preserving.

THANK YOU FOR LIKING MY PINBOARD i wanted this fic most of all to be an ode to friendship. in kandreil i think theres so much history and tension there that sometimes it's easy to forget that there are other reasons people can stay together, so i wanted to write a kerejean where they felt like they were genuinely friends before it ever started careening into romance!!!! i think it's working. Probably. it's a very joyful and warm fic (or at least i hope it is) and i've been having a lot of fun with dialogue specifically because so much of friendship is just talking! anyway ah i have to stop myself before i spoil anything so just know it's going to be fun. hopefully. and there's a scene where jean calls kevin the first flower of edgar allen (direct rip off from tlt but bear with me)

I LOVE THEM BOTH TEASING KEVIN!!!! is there anything more genuine than teasing your crush together.......... that's the kind of thing i live 4 in relationship dynamics................ ohhh i just know this fic will get me so bad if it ever sees the light of day (heh).... ALSO HE'S STILL IN COLLEGE KEVINNNNNNNNNNN kevin youre letting a man still in college boss you around youve been better and more dignified endings. AND I LOVE DRUNK JEAN THANK YOU especially needy aiyayayaya..... my favorite senseless hc is that jean is a lightweight and he cant keep up with neither jeremy nor kevin nor renee. he's drunk off of one glass while the other three compete to see who can get liver failure first. he has been consistently getting drinked under the table by kevin for years. our beautiful apple strudel....... our little cabbage as the french say. :-)

i hope my candlelight letter reaches YOU post-haste and ofc im sorry for the wait!

[5hrignold]

lsp episodes ranked by how much they make me want to punch myself in the face out of how upset i am that i cant hug and hold her for 4 hours straight

bad timing is the big one. the entire premise of that episode is basically “what if lsp finally found someone who really likes her and she connects with but it was her fault she lost him” and i love it. it consumes my mind that she could’ve had it all right there. and i really think the cherry on top is the way at the end she begs for bonnie to erase her memory of the whole thing. literally who wouldn’t do the same thing. i would

be sweet is rlly good because it has sweet pea and Also because it addresses that yeah lsp is now on good terms with her parents and doing things for herself and doing well but she still isn’t happy. she still feels alone and disconnected from other people and she regrets choices she’s made that make her feel like she isn’t worth good things other people have. it matters a lot to me because that specific thing of hers pretty much is never brought up any other time ever except in this episode so it’s special. also the part near the end where she sings the little lullaby to sweet pea Aaaaaaa. ya! her soft voice is my fav thing eever 😊😊😊

slime central is another one where it kinda revolves around her self esteem being put into a blender on highest speed lol. her idea of perfect is skating with her friends and having a boyfriend Basically. and that just gets taken away with her, she’s rejected and called terrible and humiliated. and yet after that she’s still herself because like. she has to be. the 2 biggest moments in that ep is when she falls over and everyone in booing and she’s just laying on her back in the dark looking absolutely mortified and after they get kicked out where she’s crying about never fitting in

I KNOW loyalty to the king is not an lsp episode but what there IS of her is really good. just that one scene of her wanting to be whatever the nice king finds most convenient for him and straight up PUNCHING HERSELF to force her body to be smooth.. Its a lot. its a good chunk of her character summarised like yea that 30 second scene is literally her

the monster is super important because it’s the 2nd super lsp centric episode and it does a good job summarising what she goes through throughout the series. trouble in lumpy space is like a basic introduction of her life in the most neutral “nothing has happened yet” state and this episode shows what happens afterwards and how it makes her feel. she craves the feeling of being in control of her life but it’s either not getting that or upsetting her parents so that’s already like. she’s in a bit of an emotional corner. so she runs away and is met with nothing but what feels like just more punishment for just wanting to prove to herself that she can do things on her own. also this episode im PRESUMING is where she discovers her love and deep connection to animals!! which is absolutely one of my favourite aspects of her so fuckin awefomeee

the prince who wanted everything is really really good bc it’s an entire episode basically of her venting her feelings through her fionna and cake fanfic of her oc. it’s mostly reflective of her feelings towards finn, how he was the one who made her really realise her worth, but also stuff about how she prefers to do things that make her feel good and free in the moment, and how she views her parents, even if just internally. also people take the line about lumpy space prince only being able to date “someone who is so much like me she doesn’t even exist” as another like ohh classic self absorbed lsp Moment haha! but i really really like it bc it resonates with me lowkey . lol

princess day is another one that revolves around her guilt for acting the way she does and it being all she knows how to be. from the very start of the episode her mere presence is seen as an offense and an insult to everyone around eachother and so, having not much else to do in that position, she lashes out on breakfast princess. which AGAINNN again is very much a summary of her entire character. people hate her no matter what so she resorts to doing all she knows - being loud and assertive to make people respect her at the very least. this episode is also super special bc it shows us the exact moment her and marcy meet !!! in my mind she’s kinda the first to person to really listen to what lsp has to say, and her troubles and stuff, and she genuinely enjoys her company and lsp is absolutely flattered by how fondly marcy treats her and frankly never stopped being super cautious of it for a while until she Knew she really likes her

summer showers is kind of a blur to me but it is super good. i really like viola and her dynamic with lsp in this episode is cute. we get a whole scene where lsp just ends up venting to viola pretty much completely on accident while trying to tell her how to get the raindrops just perfectly right, because everything in the play has to be top tier since it’s very important to her. this episode gives another peek into how much of a little nerd lsp is which NO ONE talks about. she loves writing, she loves acting things out and being super dramatic and getting really into playing characters, she gets invested in silly things, she’s like best friends with turtle princess for crying out loud. she is cringe!!!!! and it’s adorable and wonderful of her!!!

i talked about trouble in lumpy space before so continuing. i do like that basically her first act in the show is screwing something up completely on accident without her being able to control it (her ability to float suddenly disappearing and that resulting in her biting finn). it’s really really good lol. i love this episode so dearly for 2 huge reasons ; it’s the most we see of early seasons lsp, and it establishes what her life was like before she started being more independent. the people she knew, where she went and how her people view her, her relationship with her parents and her friends and stuff. i feel like without all the stuff we learn about lumpy space in this episode there’d be WAY less to lsp. im just extremely grateful for it because the damn place pretty much never appears again in the entire series apart from the happy place thing in elements and lsp’s scene in the come along with me ending sequence

the creeps, again, not at all An Lsp Episode, BUT it does have a scene that reveals some stuff about her that’s important, which is her inability to really commit to relationships without being afraid. she objects to talking about why she broke up with brad at first but while finn is talking to bonnie she just completely falls apart to the pressure (which is absolutely nothing) and breaks out rambling about how much she regrets it and how she thought all you needed to do to be a good girlfriend was to look pretty. which lfhfhfbfdbdbfbfbfbbfbf. my Girl…………….my poor girl

i dont really have anything to say about from bad to worse lol. she’s cute in it! the way she snatches the instructions immediately and pouts at everyone while doing so and the way she shoves everyone aside talking about how she should go first… So good. also she looks so fucking good with wings can we talk ab that maybe some time

gotcha is like Maybe perhaps my favourite out of all of these. and it’s probably because while a lot of these make me sad with the stuff they all imply about lsp and her insecurities, this one makes me SO happy. how she is at the beginning, how confident she is waltzing toward the treehouse talking about how finn won’t be able to resist her because of how beautiful she is, the way she makes the treehouse cozy for herself without anyone’s permission, her friendship with turtle princess sprinkled throughout the episode, the part with finn tucking her in, THE WHOLE PART WITH HIM SAVING HER SND THEN TELLING HER SHE DOESNT NEED TO BE PRETTY PHYSICALLY FOR PEOPLE TO LOVE HER. AHHHHHH . Good Episode. GOOD. Episode.

sorry for the tone change but as for those last three episodes i really dont have much to say like at all. absolutely all she is in them is a device used for a joke. WHICH IM FINE WITH. ADVENTURE TIME IS A KIDS SHOW AND AN OFTEN LIGHTHEARTED ONE AT THAT I DONT CARE. sorry this description really makes it seem like i dislike how she is in these eps. idk if you could tell but i fucking love lsp always. she could do the most heinous things and id defend her and adore her for it always. she has never done a single thing i dislike NOT an exagggerarion. at all. /srs there ill even say that if it makes you believe just how much i love her. space girl help me