#im actually thinking about theming my page around him

[ace-dodo]

"you like the new special event? Personally i-"

GENSHINNNNN

PUT GA MING IN ANY QUEST OR EVENT OR JUST GIVE ME CONTENT ABOUT HIM

AND MY LIFE, IS YOURS

[parfaitblogs]

i NEED a angst fic (with a happy ending ofc) based on tolerate it by taylor swift please 🙏 big chance it’s been done before though and im just the most unoriginal bitch ever

tolerate it ❀ s. reid x reader

in which spencer reid gets out of prison, and you baselessly feel like your relationship is growing increasingly one sided.  pairing: spencer reid x reader genre: angst tags: post prison reid. neglectful bf spencer reid. happy (open) ending. communication yippee. themes of self doubt in reader. mentions of spencer not eating.  word count: 2k a/n: writers block isn't real you just need to watch criminal minds season 12 episode 13 'spencer' and then listen to tolerate it on repeat for three hours straight. iiii know human beings don't talk in long monologued speeches but for the sake of my sanity let us pretend i am shakespeare and spencer reid is my leontes. plzzzz tell me if u liked this or if u didn't yay thank u ily

i sit and watch you. i notice everything you do, or don't do. (lines 3–4)

A fork scrapes against ceramic. It emits a scratching sound that hurts your ears, and you're cringing from your curled up position on the couch as you hear it. Silverware shines beneath the bright, warm glow of his kitchen light, his food barely dented as he pushes it around his plate. 

He's been playing with it since he sat down to eat it. 

You're not too sure what's going through his head as he takes barely there bites of a meal you cooked. You don't think you want to know. But it takes him all of twenty three minutes to come to the same conclusion he made last night, and every other night before that. That he isn't going to eat any more of the food, and just like his fork, his chair scrapes against the floor as he stands. 

He wraps the plate in aluminium foil, the crinkling of metal being your only indicator that he has plans to eat it later. At least, that's what you hope. 

When he disappears into the bedroom, you follow him. Like a lovesick puppy, you're trailing after him, and your chest feels hollow with how embarrassing it all is. 

He doesn't know you're watching him, though. 

At least, not to the extent you are. He's field trained enough to know that you're keeping an eye on him, but your silence is only indicative of you giving him the space he so politely asked for three days ago. He's not in his right mind to assume you're silent for any other reason, and you've battled to a loss with the thoughts of letting him into your disaster of a brain. 

He doesn't need to know that.

The ensuite door shuts behind him, and you hear the water turn on minutes later. You take the cue to curl up on your side of the bed, your fingers toying with the paper edges of a book you now had in your lap. The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, for you were rediscovering your love for children's novels amongst this trying time between you and Spencer. 

"Hey, did you buy me more shampoo?"

Your head lifts at the voice, the snowy Narnia world you had built in your brain shattering in an instant, as you're met with the dull colours of Spencer Reid's bedroom, and a showered and dressed Spencer Reid standing only a few feet away. His bedroom hadn't always been dull. Really, nothing had actually changed artistically within it to make it dull. But there's something about no longer laughing in a room once filled with so much love that mutes its vibrance. 

"Yeah," you say, dog-earing the page you were on and slipping it onto the nightstand. "I saw you were running low."

His lips part as he exhales, and you hate that you can tell he's pushing away something snippy. It wasn't that he was actively trying to start fights with you, but his temper has grown short, and he has more anger in his heart than before. 

"You didn't get the right one, that's all."

And though it isn't said rudely, your chest opens up like a black hole regardless, and a thick ball of emotion lodges in your throat.

"I'm sorry," you force past your lips, despising the hollow sound of your sad voice, and the fact that he notices it. His eyebrows frown towards each other at the sound of you, and he takes a step towards the bed.

It's pathetic, right? To be this upset over him letting you know the thing you bought him wasn't correct. In that almost fake sounding soft, kind voice he has when he is trying to keep his unnecessary frustration at bay. 

But it wasn't like this was the first time you'd done something for him in recent, and been told you did it wrong, instead of simply being thanked. Acts of service he was finding problems within no matter what they were, each new critique chipping away at the scales of your self confidence. You don't even think he's meaning to do it.

Every time this happens, memories of the other times flash violently in your head, reminding you that he could not find the beauty of being cared for by you the way he had before this. This, this thing you were barely even able to string the letters of together, because it seemed so foreign and faraway to you. Spencer Reid in prison is not a sentence that makes sense in this — or any other — timeline. You don't think it ever will. And yet.

You'd cooked him meals every single day since he got out. Meals he'd barely ever touch, wrap in foil, then put in the fridge for his work lunch the next day. You don't know if he's even eating them at work, or if he's just taking them there to throw them out. You've been too scared to reach out to any of his team members to ask. Knowledge is power, but knowledge makes his negligence all too real. 

There's a fear in calling it negligence. It isn't fair of you to expect the same man before and after prison, and you know he's dealing with more than you can fathom. You were prepared for distance. 

Just not this much.

The submerged sound of your name tugs you from your thoughts, and suddenly Spencer is closer than he was before, and he's repeating your name over and over in calling. Once you rapidly blink and shake your head, he determines you've returned to Earth, and he's falling silent again. There's concern knitting his eyebrows together, and he's got his hands hovering in the air, as if he's reaching for you, but second guessing himself at the same time. 

"Whats going on in your brain?" he asks you after a few beats of the two of you just staring at each other. 

Like a dam breaking, his question triggers an onslaught of emotions, and every fear and insecurity you've had inside you spills out.

"I feel like you suddenly hate me," your eyes rapidly search the duvet in front of you for your words. "Or—or I annoy you with my presence? Or my care? I mean, I try to do things for you and you barely even spare them a second glance, or thought. You barely talk to me anymore outside of updating me on your schedule. We sleep with miles of distance between us," you gesture to the bed beside you. "I cook you meals you don't eat, I wash your clothes you don't fold. Both of which are things that I'm fine with, because I can't imagine how skewed your appetite is, and I—I know laundry is a trigger now. But there is not even a slight hint of you—you being thankful. You know, appreciative. I feel like I'm following you around like a servant, and I'm doing things with no gratitude in return. I'm doing things I shouldn't have to, because I'm your girlfriend. Not your maid. But they are things that I want to do, because I care for you, and I love you," you pause, a self deprecating smile appearing on your face. "And—and you haven't even told me you love me since the day we got you home. Do you even love me, still? No, don't answer that. I don't think I want to know. I mean, I do. I don't know. God, Spencer, can you say something?"

He doesn't. For a long while, he stares at you, and you train your eyes on the pattern on the bedding you're currently sitting under. His gaze is pulverising, and every second that passes is another limb turning to dust beneath it. His silence should be enough of an answer for you. Yet, you hold onto groundless hope still.

It feels like eternity has passed you by, by the time you hear his voice again.

"I don't mean to make you think I don't love you," he says. "I do love you. Which feels meaningless to confess to you now, knowing how you feel, and I wish my expansive knowledge of words could come up with a confession that does justice to how you feel, but also makes you feel better. I can only hope you take it at face value, and don't assume I'm saying it because it's what you want me to say." 

He finds a seat on the bed in front of you, fingers fidgeting with each other as he fixates on the wooden flooring in front of him. 

"I am grateful for everything you've done for me recently. I'm sorry I haven't expressed that. I'm having a hard time putting one foot in front of the other, let alone stringing together sensical thoughts. I wish I could tell you what my mind sounds like without feeling guilty about it. It isn't nice, and every thought I have is far from positive," he lifts his eyes to you, and you watch in real time as they soften, for the first time since he came home. "I will tell you that there's you. Among every awful thought and feeling I have, there is you. I think I... I think I've been coming across as ungrateful because you are a breath of relief after every bad thought and feeling. Am I making sense?" you nod your head, and he sighs in, namely, relief. "I take a step back from processing my emotions and figuring out how I'm going to talk about them with that bureau therapist when I think about you, because you are the one good thing I have to hold on to. So I just bask in the thought of you, or the sight of you, and focus on nothing else."

You aren't sure when you began to cry, and you only realise it when you have to sniffle before speaking. "You can focus on so many things at once, though." 

"Not anymore," he admits, looking back down. "I don't know what's happened. I've gone from having a brain that works inhumanly — which is objectively an incorrect statement, but I digress — to one that cannot multitask on two separate things at once." 

"Oh," you whisper. "I see."

"I'm so sorry I've made you feel as though your efforts go unnoticed, honey," he murmurs. "They don't. This has just been really difficult."

"I know," you say, wiping your tear stained face with the back of your hand. 

There's a part of you that wants this to be the end of it. The end of self doubt, and distance, and instead the beginning of your relationship rebuilding itself alongside Spencer. 

There's a larger, more logical part of you, that knows you cannot just sweep every self conscious doubt under the rug and move on. 

"I just want some time," you tell him, and his shoulders tense as you speak. "Not to—not to break up. Or even for us to have a break. I don't want that. I've just felt very... unloved. Like you're merely tolerating my presence in your life. And now, I know you aren't. But I have to find my confidence in myself in this relationship again before I can move on."

"Okay," his voice is strained as he speaks, and you know he's not exactly content with your request for space.

You try not to focus on that, in order to stand firm in your decision. 

That is where the conversation ends. And just like every other night, he climbs into bed and leaves a considerable amount of distance between your two bodies. You choose not to dwell on it, because this is now him giving you the space you so politely requested. You were catastrophising, and you'd be damned if you let such a thing control your life any longer. 

It maybe wasn't all in your head, but you still had to take the self doubt shaped dagger from your stomach out.

now i'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life. (line 30)

your reblogs and replies are always appreciated ♡

[discotitsposts]

meant to be

Spencer trying and failing to flirt with you because you are oblivious to his attempts.

spencer reid x reader

i picture this as later seasons spencer maybe sometime around 12-14?

some mature themes mentions of sex at the end so 18+

writing this because i saw something about people who are bad at flirting and that’s literally me. (i hope ppl get the reference w the nickname)

Spencer had tried every day to get your attention romantically. It didn’t work. Nothing did. You were so oblivious to all of his flirting attempts. He figured maybe you had trouble understanding so he worked harder to make you think of him as more than a friend. He tried everything his genius brain could come up with.

He even made up a nickname for you, Bean, because you always had a coffee in your hand, and because he was taller than you.

Today you were getting coffee with him as usual. At your favorite coffee shop and library. You didn’t work at the BAU so you would eventually have to go to your own job so Spencer decided to try again.

Since you lived in the same building, neighbors in the same hall, he picked you up every morning. Drove you to get coffee and you each picked a book for each other and then he drove you to work.

He knocks on your door awaiting anxiously. You come out in your outfit, just a t shirt and jeans. you didn’t have a dress code at your job, you were an author and usually went into a nice office that the publishing company provided to write since you had a hard time focusing in your apartment. Too many distractions.

In Spencer’s car you make small talk as he tries to think of a way to flirt with you. Normally he’d call Morgan but his son was a toddler now so he was busy. He gets so lost in his head he doesn’t realize he just ran a stop sign on accident and almost hit someone.

He hears you yell “Spencer what the fuck!” and slams the brakes. The other car honks and his heart is pounding in his brain. He pulls to the side of the road and stops.

“Spencer. Breathe. It’s ok.” You worry tracing your face at the sight of his extremely fast breathing and you rub his back reassuringly.

“Holy shit.” He barely chokes out. His face is beet red and he looks like he’s about to have a panic attack.

“Switch.” You tell him. He looks at you and feels comforted immediately by your face. “Let’s go, switch.” You get out of the car and switch sides.

‘So much for flirting’ he thinks. Then it hits him. When he picks your book for the day, he’ll give you a romantic story. Something that says ‘I really like you but I’m an idiot so I don’t know how to tell you but i’m not actually an idiot because im technically a genius but my fucked up life has ruined romance for me but i’d love to try it with you if you are okay with that.’

When you take over driving you don’t talk. You just focus on the road. You had even turned the music off. He hopes you’re not upset with him. That thought quickly dissipates when you pull into the parking lot and your face is beaming. You both race to the entrance and he gets there first and opens the door for you. You stick your tongue out at him and he smirks.

You order your usual drinks and he gets himself a breakfast bagel and you get a croissant. He puts the food at a table and you both get up to grab each other a book. You had yours picked since last night, The Godfather. It’s only a little over 400 pages so he’ll probably finish it by lunch time but at least it will be fun for him since it will make him think of you. At least you hope it does.

You have a habit of making funny commentary during movie nights. When you watched ‘The Godfather’ trilogy with Spencer he had laughed so hard he cried.

Meanwhile Spencer is searching rows of books looking for the right one. He moves to poetry but nothing feels right. He feels slightly frustrated so he moves back to classics and picks ‘A Little Princess’ instead. A favorite of yours you had read in elementary school. Not romantic but shows he knows you well.

When he makes his way back to the register to check the book out, you’re already seated munching your croissant. He makes his way to you and hides the book behind his back. You discreetly pull yours out of your bag and hide it the same way.

“1,2,3!” You both count at the same time and then reveal your books. Spencer cracks up when he sees the book you had picked. He had read this before but he enjoyed it because it reminded him of you. You both eat and finish your coffees. You look at each other.

“More?” Spencer asks.

“Obviously.” You answer. You both stand up and order more coffee.

Back in Spencer’s car you open the book and start reading. He’s about to put the key in the ignition when sudden confidence hits him. He doesn’t know if it’s the caffeine but he doesn’t care. He should kiss you right now. He stares at you until you look up.

“You’re going to be late for work if you don’t start that engine up soon Mr. Chauffeur.” You tease him.

He leans closer and puckers his lips slightly. He’s so filled with lust he just can’t wait anymore.

You look at him strangely. Was he trying to kiss you right now? Probably not. Truth was you were always so filled with doubt whenever you liked someone. Especially Spencer. He was just too handsome and sweet and perfect.

He leans in even closer to you and tilts his head. You, however, had gone back to your book and weren’t even looking at him.

“Does this make you uncomfortable” Spencer leans in closer. He closes his eyes and you lean down to reach for something from your bag. He doesn’t feel your soft lips on his and thinks he may have missed your face. He opens his eyes.

“Everything does. I have anxiety Spencer. All the time anywhere day and night. ” You reply while eating a yogurt you had found in your tote.

Spencer pulls away and smacks his forehead. He starts the car and drops you at your work and drives to the BAU feeling defeated. What would it take for you to realize how bad he wants you.

That night he decides to drop by your apartment. You had gotten a ride home from work by a friend tonight. He opens his door and walks the short distance to yours.

When his hand knocks on your door he feels nervous. You open the door and greet him.

“Hi!” You cheer.

“Hey, I was gonna order a pizza. You want?” He lies. He actually wasn’t the biggest fan of pizza. He didn’t eat it too often but it was your favorite food so why not.

“That would be great. I’m starving.” You clutch your belly dramatically. Which makes Spencer laugh.

He picks up the phone, “What would you like on the pizza m’lady.”

You tap your chin and think. “Sausage.” You reply. Spencer thinks of a way to flirt. Kind of.

“How much sausage would you like?” He asks smirking.

“Uhh, 5? I don’t know dude. The normal amount that goes on a pizza?” You answer sarcastically, going to your dvd rack to pick a movie. Spencer sighs. He calls and places the order and helps you pick a movie.

“How about ‘How To Be A Serial Killer?’ That’s a good one. I love Matthew Gray Gubler in this one so much.” You fan girl a little.

“Who the fuck is Matthew Gray Gubler? Also, no, not with my line of work. I need a break from that.” Spencer asks with a hint of jealousy in his voice. You clasp your hand over your heart dramatically.

“Ok, fine. how about a Disney Classic? Sleeping Beauty is my favorite.” You ask. Spencer nods. You put the movie on and grab two root beers from your fridge. Spencer thanks you when you hand him one and you lay a big fluffy blanket over you both. Not far into the movie the pizza arrives and you cheers Spencer with your pizza slice.

After you both eat and are full the movie is still on. You’re starting to feel sleepier by the second. Spencer offers you to lay with him and you take him up on it. He’s basically a giant teddy bear. He’s so warm and comfortable.

“I’ve got a real life sleeping beauty right here.” He whispers to you. You smile with your eyes closed. Too sleepy to open. He gets out from under you, to your dismay. He cleans up the trash from eating. He even washes some dishes you had left sitting. When he comes back, you’re still half awake. He sees you sneak an eye open to look at him and your smile after.

“It seems there’s a fair maiden who has fallen asleep. However can we wake her? What if she sleeps for a hundred years?!” He exclaims. You start giggling softly. He leans closer to observe you.

“I don’t believe it! She’s laughing in her sleep! Must be quite a funny dream. Wonder what it is. Only one way to find out.” He gently leans down and kisses your lips softly. This action puts you in shock and you’re blushing. He starts to pull away because doubts fill his mind. You grab his hair and pull him back in.

You both pull back and he starts to ask you,

“Were you ok with that?”

You cut him off, “Yes.” Then you rip your shirt off. Spencer’s in shock. He follows your lead and starts undressing. He picks you up and carries you to your bedroom. The kiss you’re sharing is deepening by the second.

“Fuck why is it so hot in here.” You complain.

“I can think of a few reasons.” Spencer had been kissing you on your neck sucking the skin softly. He lays you back on the bed. He makes you comfortable. He goes down on you and then fucks you like you’ve never been fucked before.

The next morning you woke up naked next to him flashes of last night replaying. You couldn’t believe it. Spencer was so passionate! You didn’t even imagine he liked you like that.

He groans next to you and turns over. You get up and put on some coffee. When you come back into the bedroom he’s awake and looking for you.

“Hey, coffee’s ready.” You lean over and kiss him. He groans too tired to give an answer. He pulls you into the bed and holds you longer.

With him, this felt so easy and realistic.

Then you realize something.

This was meant to be.

the end ♡

to anyone who read this far: hope u enjoyed reading!! please let me know if u enjoyed! xoxo

[ofbreathandflame-archive]

stans are actually very funny bc they often time talk themselves into the weirdest corners.

the whole point of criticizing acosf and its handling of nesta's character is to prove the point that sjm...doesn't like nesta as a character. that's is literally THE point - that sjm often abandons her moral themes (abuse, trauma, assault, etc.,) for character's deemed as undesirable or villainous to a capacity - and its through the handling of those 'vilified' (i.e. main character opposed - not even villianous) that we can gauge the extent to which sjm actually believes the ideals of her story. like - it is alarming that the only tolerable, empathetic parts of the a court of silver flames were the moments you could tell where ripped straight from sjm's own life (the hiking, training, mind-stilling etc.,). any actual characteristics about nesta weren't explored...like at all. her relationship with feyre and elain, with her mother, her trauma from her sexual assault, her conflicted relationship with her grandmother, her life before the cabin, her life during the cabin. in 800 pages - i still don't know mama archeron's name. what was life like in the cabin? what did nesta do all day? what was the dynamic? what was going on between elain and nesta?i don't know anything about her and nesta, we don't know anything about nesta's human life, her conversation with clare bedor, her relationship with clare beddor, moments with her dad - not even touching moments with him (and part of this story is her finding love for her dad). mind you we read 800+ pages and we learned absolutely nothing about her.

we essentially read sjm's emotional journey in one part, and a taming of the shrew narrative in another. i think the only way sjm had genuine interest in exploring nesta's story is through essentially self-inserting herself and avoiding the actual plot-points she set up in the first three books. like did nesta have childhood friends? if losing the wealth so drastically affected her life wouldn't she reminisce about it a lot? would she yearn for her mother? who were her childhood friends, how did she function at court?

and the whole point of saying alll of that is to argue the misuse of these topics - serious discussions abuse are only reserved for certain situation, and others its completely undermined in a way that only reinforces the negative ideals to begin with. (i.e. nesta needs to abused bc..." "the intervention was harsh but" - pair that with discussion around what feyre needed in acomaf - and it makes much more sense).

nesta antis often jump between the fact that nesta is so favored that sjm nerfed feysand to 'redeem her' and arguing that sjm secretly does everything in her power to embarrass and secretly laugh at people who like nesta's character. (1) we've gotta pick one or the other (2) in my humble opinion - sjm would have always given feyre a pregnancy plot like this regardless of whether this was nesta's book or elain. its literally so sjm. im shocked people are surprised she pulled the pregnancy as she did.

as with the tamlin discussion we had under this post - i think the story undermines its discussion of abuse with feyre/tam by essentially insinuating that tamlin (when placed in the same victimized position as feyre) should have sucked it up and braved out his abuse with amarantha (and the same with rhysand as well - esp with the deliberate foil of rhysand's 'willingness' v. tamlin's unwillingness). and when we start to have a real conversation ultilizing our own irl analysis and standards we really see how harmful and rather sisyphean the conversation becomes. instead of engaging with these topics earnestly, they only engage in them to prove a point - which is how the issue began in the first place. the whole issue with rhysand isn't the fact that he engages with harmful, potentially villainous positions. no - its that the book wants to prove that tamlin is wrong by justifying rhysand's actions. so even though rhysand and tamlin almost always have the same written and expressed intentions in their abuse of feyre, the book flocks to justify one, and eschews the other. and thats why we get so much reactionary critcism of rhys that is surface: people only admit the problems because they know antis will, not because they actually believe their are issues in the story.

and perhaps im still speaking into a void here but i can tell there's tension between pro stans wanting to have these serious conversations but understanding they can only really introspect so far until the conversation begin to prod at the validity of the topics being brought forth. so stans have to jump between invalidating the romantasy genre ("its just faeries") and treating this book as a serious topic (cue: "sjm put a hotline in the back of the book"). this is also the exact reason why the racism conversations stall (i.e. why inherent superiority is always passively emphasized - despite cc1 + 2 centering human oppresion there is no human in the ensemble cast. despite the fact that illyrian women are the most oppressed - rhys has no illyrian women - or reg illyrians (not his brothers) in his inner circle. aelin 'sacrificing' her human body).

[ryemackerel]

idk shit about Ed’s world BUT who am I if not a hyperfixation enabler. give me your hcs for this series

ELLIOT IM GONNA GO INSANEWEHRG OK OK IM SO READY FOR THIS 😈😈😈 Im going to be insane about Matt since I might overfill the page if I do the others LMAOAO

I like to imagine my hcs take place in 2016? Matt was born August something, 1990, so she would be 26 in hcs.

Some starters!! He LOVESS aquatic life, mainly jellyfish and sharks. He's very fond of frutiger aero in that matter :-)

Matt and Tom were the ones that came up with the idea of starting a band in high school! They invited Tord and Edd to join in, and it evolved into what is known today as "The Creatures From Mum's Basement"! Matt is lead singer and guitarist in a bunch of their songs.

Matt and Edd were the only ones out of the four to go to college. While Edd studied art and animation, Matt studied fashion design and cosmetology. Matt is really REALLY good at designing outfits and doing makeup. She often helps the others do their makeup or design outfits for special occasions.

I never really saw Matt as an actual narcissist? At least in my hcs! In the series he's characterized to be very full of himself, but I wanted to give a little more nuance for my hcs. Esp since I wanted my hcs to be centered around comfort and overall slice of life? While also giving the boys some of their own flaws n struggles, and really trying to dive deeper into how they develop as characters over time.

(Healing/Slice of Life AUs seem to be the overall theme for almost all of the fandoms I've been in LMAOAKA)

Matt is very much a very compassionate guy who loves the other three with ALLL of her heart. She's very hyperactive and loves to ramble about all of the things she loves. He's very expressive, energetic, and cares deeply about everyone he loves. I bet you he will literally go on a 10 minute ramble of how much he adores and loves Tom, Edd, or Tord. He is also!! very clingy. He will hold on so so tightly to the closest person to him and never let go /silly

However, Matt is nothing short of a pessimist. I think of Matt as a short fuse, or a wall of glass. Something bad happens, and it could quickly ruin his day. I tend to see her having a very fragile self-esteem, and often relies on compliments and reassurance from the others.

Ofc there are times where Matt can have a lot of pride about herself, but on other occasions that can quickly fluctuate. That, and also him having really bad anxiety leads him to catastrophisize a lot of outcomes.

Her mind tends to race a lot; she gets extremely worried if she accidentally upsets someone, or if someone doesn't come home for a while, she might believe something bad happened to them. He's very quick to act on his anxiety and struggles to really settle down. I also see her having a short temper whenever things just, really don't go her way the way she expects them to.

(more under the break)

I like to take a character's traits and compare them with the others because! Often times I like to think a pair of characters can share a lot of similar traits, maybe even build off of each other, or even heavily contrast with one another.

Take TomMatt for example, my favorite duo :-] While you have Matt who tends to be very open and expressive about things that bother him, Tom, in contrast, doesn't like to open up. Tom loves being around the others and expressing his love, but he often comes off as *closed off* whenever he has shit on his mind.

Another thing is Tom also has awful anxiety, but the way he handles this is a LOT more different than Matt. Matt seeks out reassurance, rants/vents a lot, and at times tries self-care. However, Tom, to put it lightly, tends to shove it off, handles it with distractions, and prioritizes the others instead of himself.

Matt can get ahead of himself and come up with a bunch of catastrophes, but Tom, I can imagine, is more of a realist and helps ground Matt whenever she goes too far.

"But??? What if Tord doesn't come back because something bad happened?? He said he would be coming back yesterday, and it's been 3 days! Do you think he crashed his car? Or, maybe he changed his mind, and decided he doesn't want to be with us anymore?"

"If Tord didn't like us, he wouldn't have decided to come back in the first place. Also, he might be really busy in the army and had to postpone a bunch of shit, maybe that's why he couldn't come back sooner."

"...Well, what if he doesn't come back at all?"

"We're just gonna have to see."

I'll stop it here for now because I intended to go super short and simple, but I had wayyy too much fun with this HGRHE hope you enjoyed a little preview into my hcs!!

Also off-topic but with the amount of times I like to write a lot of scenarios in my art's captions, I'm considering writing fanfiction 🤭

[oddberryshortcake]

Hi Oddberry! I saw that you saw my ask on Cozi's page and the confusion I had along with it 💀

Now that I think about it I actually do remember Cozi mentioning your Megara OC/yuy was yours and just forgot! 😭 My apologies 😅

Buuuuuuut…now that I know who the owner is, may I ask for some lore on your oc and what her relationship is like with the other NRC cast?

It’s no problem at all! Cozy and I have been collaborating together for years so there is a lot of overlap. She’s the designer of Katerina, but she helped some with characterization too, just as I pitch in sometimes with Tia and the boys!

I’m sorry I don’t have any fun visuals to accommodate this and it’s just words BUT hopefully it’ll be an interesting read. 

It will be under read more so I don’t bother everyone, OKAY LETS GO!

Grim-  Starts off as a sort of Meg with Pain + Panic type of dynamic where they make little digs at each other and argue in petty ways. Obviously they both genuinely care about each other and are protective in their own ways. That's her lil guy, and she is HIS hench-human who he must protect at all costs.

Ace + Deuce- Best friends #1 and #2, at first they both treat her like she can't do anything herself because she 1. doesn't have magic 2. is a girl (who is still taller than them but still.) Her intellect, though often coming off as sarcastic in her advice, and her fencing abilities prove that she isn't some helpless magicless girl make their friendship feel more equal. They're basically her little brothers now. They still walk on either side of her around school just so the other students don't get any funny ideas.

Riddle- She and Riddle have similar moms (I changed up her upbringing after reading Go The Distance by Jen Calonita) Kat's mom isn't as abusive as Riddle's, but incredibly overbearing and imposing because she wants her daughter to live a successful life. This is a theme with her and the other over blotters, but she empathizes with him and the two of them get along well. I think the moment between Yuka and Riddle in Book 2 manga where Riddle fixes Yuka's outfit for her feels very them too.

Cater and Trey- Basic cordial relationship, no complaints there besides annoyance at their previous complacency in Riddle's overbearing rules

Leona- She's a strong and respectable woman. He's already ready to help her out in a pinch. He's reliable and smart. They get along well.

Jack- Another bestie. I think the two would have a good time doing exercises together. She doesn't join him for a run every day but he's good motivation to not rot in her bed on weekends.

Ruggie- She loves his hustle. Eat the rich, lil dude.

Azul- What a slime ball. She takes everything he says with a grain of salt. HOWEVER, she has been bullied in the past (not as bad as he was, but was intentionally excluded and isolated from her peers) that vulnerability is hard to show, of course he does everything he can to cover it up. If she makes a deal with him, she's sure to read the fine print and always makes good on her word so she can get out. It'd be no good if she was in debt twice.

Floyd- Called her a catfish, offending her right off the bat. However, he's tons of fun to hang out with when he's in the right move. He demanded she teach him to fence as soon as he found out she could do it. Now he calls her 'catfish' with a lot more affection. The nickname isn't so bad now.

Jade- She can't tell what he's thinking unlike his twin and Jade's teasing doesn't always sit right with her, but he knows how to behave himself. But she is gonna be looking at im like 🤨 occasionally

Kalim- OH KALIM!!! Kalim, she wants to preserve your happiness. I feel like Kat would get along really well with the light trio as a homage to Meg working for the villain but falling in love with a genuinely kind well-meaning hero. Kat definitely blends in well with typical NRC students with a healthy amount of skepticism towards the intentions of others and being admittedly pretty cut-throat when upset. She sees how Kalim made mistakes, but knows his intentions weren't bad, and she still feels a bit guilty for snapping at him so badly at Book 4 out of frustration. She doesn't want Kalim to lose the optimism he has for the world, in fact, she wishes she had that kind of joy herself. They get along pretty well...Perhaps, TOO well.

Jamil- They're literally like two peas in a pod, like a girl version of him. I imagine Kat and Jamil rant about stuff together while braiding each other's hair and whispering sarcastic remarks to each other. She has empathy for him and wants him and Kalim to turn out okay, but she doesn't impose, it's not like she understands the full extent of what they're going through but she's there to lend a helping hand, or nod and go "exactlyyy" when Jamil vents to her.

Vil- He'd want to take her under his wing. She's pretty, has modeled in the past in her original world, is literally supermodel height and is full of potential. She views him as overbearing at first and then becomes appreciative of his strength and care for his dorm mates. Sure, he gets on her for not making the best decisions with what she does with her day, but it's not so bad to get free skin and hair care stuff.

Rook- She found him off-putting at first but then grew to appreciate the fact that he finds beauty in everything...She wishes she could view the world like that. Damn light trio, making her guarded heart melt like that. His earnestness is a trait she's come to respect and surprisingly, his appreciation for her almost goes up to the same levels as Neige and Vil 😳 h-hello?? Oh he's so sad he didn't get to see the work she did in her original world...

Epel- BESTIEEEE! They're so tall queen and short king. Kat is forever grateful of everything he did for her in Book 5, from letting her squeeze the life outta him from her fear of heights when they rode a broom together to literally saving her life with his spell. They totally had mini sleepovers when she stayed in Pomefiore during Ramshackle renovations.

Idia- Oh man, the Hades/Meg dynamic right here. Her phone died and she lost all of her old game consoles and manga collection when she came to Twisted Wonderland, he saw this as an opportunity to convert someone irl into his nerd interests. He uses it as blackmail to get her to do stuff for him like run errands and junk. It's really just a stupid excuse to become more isolated and to keep her around, Kat resents him as she feels she's being used. After Book 6, he drops the act and frees her from her 'debt,' now they just hang out and play games like normal friends. He comes up with cringey nicknames to call her and Muscle Red has assumed she was his girlfriend during a gaming session between the three of them. Idia is currently planning how he, Ortho and Kat can group cosplay now that he has the confidence to do it in public with his gamer-girl friend (I cringe as I write this)

Ortho- Basically #3 bestie next to Ace and Deuce. They relationship started tied to Idia, Kat assuming that Ortho was just some robot servant Idia made, which Ortho corrected her on. She felt personally responsible for Ortho going rogue during Book 6, with her being dismissive of his role as Idia's younger brother haunting her as she never got to properly apologize. As a homage to Meg ending up in Tartarus, I had Kat personally go in there to get Grim, Idia, and Ortho as they fell. She's the one who manages to grab Ortho's memory chip before Vil drags all of them out (Kat wasn't physically changed by Tartarus since she doesn't exactly belong in that world but uh, maybe you'll find out more lol). She believes that Ortho is dead for a while and feels immense guilt over it and definitely didn't cry in her Pomefiore bed at night when they got back (she did.) So when Ortho comes BACK and also BECOMES A STUDENT she had never been so proud and happy. If she catches ANYONE trying to bully Ortho, she will fight (not that he needs it, he has a laser) and appreciates Ortho's general helpfulness. She has played video games in his new dorm room many times.

Malleus- She thinks he's odd, but in a cool and mysterious way. The two of them enjoy talking and wandering around at night. She's invited him inside Ramshackle and when he agrees a few times, she shows him some modern human stuff and they bond over the fact that they're BOTH new to twisted wonderland tech (I imagine it's close to normal tech but different in a way that there would be a learning curve). She definitely thinks he can get carried away with his magic but doesn't treat him with fear. Her stance on him is pretty identical to that of Silver and Sebek's in Book 7, she needs to stop him but also wants to save him.

Sebek- A bestie that took a while to come around. The two get into arguments, with Kat usually taking Silver's side in most small conflicts, both cause she likes Silver and also likes to spite Sebek, but Sebek comes to respect her and her ability to fight for herself. Kat sees who Sebek really is and accepts him. The two still bicker, but it's ride or die by Book 7. If there's one thing they both always agree on, it's that Silver needs to stop hating himself.

Silver- These two...I have an affection for their dynamic because I believe Silver is the closest to a twst Hercules that we have so far. Sweet, a lil air-headed, strong with a kind heart. Kat would feel similarly toward him that Meg goes toward Herc, she wants to keep him safe and she can't detect any of the typical NRCness from him. He's just genuinely a good person and it makes her soft. The two of them both train together, mostly with batons for sword fighting. Kat finds him strange and enchanting and Silver views Kat as a strong person with a talent for swordsmanship. They are each other's rock for Book 7 and I sure hope nothing bad happens to them.

Lilia- He's so weird, but charming. She already figured that he's Muscle Red from context clues but she hasn't said a word to Idia about it because it's funnier that he still doesn't know. He gives her candy for talking to his 'precious boys' and generally spoils her. Kat's father wasn't in her life but Lilia...Y'know, maybe he's what having a dad feels like.

[whywasthissohardtomake]

okay!! So before i go into b & iii, i also had a lot of Thoughts about art i wanna make for this!!

so!! Heres my like really shitty finger drawing for the rest of the Team Biscuit Portraits (which i kinda wanna name something silly & melodramatic like Skies of War of Skies of Wrath or something to do with the sky & combat). Also ill go into my thoughts about the concepts below!

Okay, so. Starting with lindy on the left. I thought that 1) she should actually have like mirage-esque versions of herself merging into the real one in the middle. With specious sorceror & conterfeit combatant (does she have more? I cant remember). Anyway, and then 2) i thought like a sunset or dusk would look really good for her background. Like shifting colors, things in flux, etc.

for neil (in the center) im thinking a look of concentration & sun breaking thru a cloudy sky. 1) because of the like associations with the sun that healing has (not necessarily within hwfwm but within like earth mythology stuff) and 2) neil is the healer, so he is yknow the light when shit gets dark. Anywho, for his pose i wanted something like suitably majestic, so i thought maybe holding the orb in one hand & then putting the other palm out with maybe some light glowing from it? (Also i guess everyone is like floating in the air lmao. Thats fun. Tho lindyll have to be high up with the sun setting near her feet due to the horizon line. Ooo thats fun)

finally, for clive on the right, i have his pose there & then hell have a ritual circle coming from the wand. Additionally, i decided i wanted an open, sort of big, thick robe over top everything. idk, i always imagine clive with a big robe that like falls down his arms when he raises them revealing his strong forearms or whatever it is people lust after. Anywho, his shirt/vest will be open & i think ill have the tattoo onslow glowing with some wisps of magic flowing downwards. And then hes, yknow, in front of the moon & stars <3.

OKAY ONTO WHAT IM CALLING TEAM BISCUIT IN RELAXATION

this will be another 6 portraits of em by themselves. These ones are gonna be of them like doing their hobbies ig? Vaguely in that realm. I also want these to have more complex backgrounds, like cityscapes & rooms, etc. Ill start with the ones im sure on already.

jason will be cooking. Im gonna make him look very sweet & soft & hes gonna have like batter on his face. I think he’ll have a spread of baked goods around him & maybe a fruity cocktail to sip at as he works.

sophie is gonna be in a cage match like she did in euresh. I wanna have her with her fists up, suppression collar on, & the pov of the drawing is over her opponent’s shoulder, who’s out of focus. That’s my thought for her!

clive is gonna be at a research desk. I either want him to be like clutching his hair as he stares at a sprawl of pages around him, or at a chalkboard, face in profile as he reads a floating book.

for lindy im thinking i’ll use the pose and city idea that a scrapped for the sky themed stuff because it was a bit to jovial & had a mismatched background to the rest.

now, humphrey & neil are where im struggling a little. Neil more than humphrey.

for humphrey, i was thinking him reading on a couch with puppy stache next to him. (Butlericfy’s suggestion basically) & then behind him would be a balcony opened up onto greenstone behind him, including parts of the sea. I feel pretty good about this one, but im not sure if there’s a better hobby for him to be doing? Like bro, what do u do in ur spare time? (The book hes reading is one his mom gave him is my thought).

now, onto my poor boy neil. What are your hobbies bro?? Do you do anything?? My only thought was to have him doing some healing, which i know he does in his spare time. But like humphrey’s its not quite a hobby yknow? It is what ill go with tho if inspiration doesn’t strike.

OKAY so the third set (ik its a lot) is less detailed in thought so far. Basically i just wanna do team biscuit as well as farrah & gary with their summoned familiars. Like either in battle or doing something cute yknow? So no sophie or rufus. Maybe ill give them a drawing of them like playing a board game together while everyone’s out bonding with their familiars lol.

alright guys we’re almost done. (Im not even sure if anyone likes these in depth musings on art i wanna make but whatevs. At the least, they’ll serve as notes for me). SO! The last two pieces i have thought of but im floundering a bit for the second one. Theyre both big group drawings &, like all the other things i wanna draw for this fandom, are gonna be hella difficult.

first, i wanna do a team biscuit eating lunch in the cloud house. I want people laughing & eating & some little character dynamic details & stache transformed into something silly with a mustache. The whole nine yards of a cute group drawing.

the second is where the difficulties come in. I want to draw something similar to the first. But a picnic/bbq in greenstone cause i think thatll look nice & i want it to have team biscuit, farrah, rufus, and gary. But also dawn, taika, erika, emi, asya, kaito, jason’s dad, jason’s uncle, ian, amy, kaito’s two kids, greg, and maybe craig vermillion. And you may be like, “three of those people are dead & the rest aren’t in this world!” And that’s where the conundrum comes in. I want two versions of this one. a would just be like a normal happy gathering & b would have jason looking straight at the viewer, face blank & SOMETHING with the people who aren’t supposed to be here!

but!! How to change them?? So, i want the dead people & the alive people on earth (plus dawn i think) to look visually different. My first thought was having the dead ones like either in black & white or just black silhouettes? Like how they were when they were summoned? And then the earth ones would be like slightly transparent, maybe with a kinda blurry face? But im just not sure. Thoughts?

anywho, AFTER ALL OF THAT, i wanna do little comics! (Especially the clive becoming manic over magic. I havent forgotten evilphrog!!)

so yes. This is my ramble of plans! Hopefully i will get it done eventually! Yayyyy!!

as always pls no spoilers!

[davekat-sucks]

You know, when i originally sent my ask about whitestuck/transtuck then proceeded to the bit about the Striders being sexual harassers for the whole reason of spite and pulling a bait n switch. Why? Because i knew people who would get mad at that first part would jump at the opportunity to tell me im wrong but would shy away from answering that last part because people love to conveniently ignore or lie about parts of the story. It goes into my first point that a lot of people didn't actually read the comic. People get Daves character wrong a lot, he isn't really smooth or unbothered. He often breaks his persona and isn't a stoic as people think, he gets into long spergy tangents and can be bully at times but he deeply cares for his friends and yes he actually was hurt when bro died. But it feels like people prefer fanon interpretation which i find to get old fast reducing him only to a smart ass. If people do explore his emotional side they make him a super pathetic sad boy. My biggest issue with fandoms now in days are the characters get misinterpreted horribly and even on purpose making discussion around them difficult because people are so attached to their headcanons that they'll ignore any real detail about the characters. Like im sorry if you seriously think Dave would celebrate being Jewish, you must have missed the entire page where he shits on religion as a whole. Like can people realize their headcanons are what THEY BELIEVE THEMSELVES and NOT something that actually happened? Im not saying you can't draw or interpret the characters differently but can you accept that it doesn't match with the source material and its ok if it doesn't and you don't have to be on the defense about it? Like keep fanon and canon separate is all im asking. What does headcanon even mean anymore? I thought it was just a small plausible detail you could make or create about the character be some of them change the characters completely like an AU. Was there ever a proper definition? Whatever, Dave isn't even my favorite character anyway yet i remember he has hobbies outside of music. I love homestuck!

Had always assumed headcanon would be something that could be added to canon based on small evidence that the story never dwells upon, similarities to character trait, or could draw parallel to another character if they have a close connection. For example, Eridan playing the viola headcanon. That headcanon of mine mirrors to how Rose plays the violin. The notes for the viola on the open strings is C to A, which matches his handle, caligulasAquarium.

It can also be a jab at him being disliked by others since most would go for violin than viola when recruiting for musicians. Viola is really unpopular among music players. The sound of viola is also darker, which matches how Eridan would present himself and how he would feel by Murderstuck. I don't mind headcanons without base or evidence. But sometimes, I think a headcanon can really work best if there is enough established connection to what is said in the story and could expand upon if the original series never explores deeper to play with certain themes. Another is projection because either they want to be like this character that they couldn't be in real life if they try to improve themselves, or for the most part, want to meet a type of person like them in real life and date them. I am guilty of this as well. I'm fine if others don't think Eridan is great when he is mostly being slandered in the narrative. It's fine and can accept it. It's all in good fun and laughs. Most either want to be cool like Dave or they project themselves onto Karkat because they want to meet someone like Dave. The old fandom had used to project themselves onto Jade or Nepeta, but they don't anymore. For Jade, it's because they are jaded, ha ha, and became more cynical that they aren't the genki girl like they thought they were. For Nepeta, though she would represent the fandom and fangirls, people think she is creepy for shipping her real life friends despite trolls gossiping about quadrants is more normal in Alternia compared to humans and Earth. The fandom had made lots of different AUs back then. But now, it's become scarce that nobody would try to make interesting AUs. Sure there is the occasional bloodswap or alternate timelines, but it never seemed to gain much attention like Heinoustuck had. Undertale had more AUs when Homestuck has more backing for it with Dream Bubbles and Doomed Timelines. And this is all before Deltarune was a thing.

[nnnyxie]

IZU ANON IS BACK!! So I spent the day in Paris and saw SOOO many couples so I felt inspired (that’s a lie I’ve been lurking around your blog but felt weird requesting so much so close together and didn’t want to overwhelm you so I waited😞) anyways

Hc’s for Soulmate!Izu x Tatooed!Reader because I’m sickly inlove with soulmate au‘s

Especially writing that shows up on the others skin<3 The reader just drawing super ugly cats and doodles all the time- I feel like Izu would be the more artistic one and reader would suck at it but still do it all the time (this is more me telling you my hcs rather than requesting them from you but i literally can’t talk to anyone else about this please bear with me😭) and Izu would like draw SUPER realistic and detailed all might portraits or something and then reader like get’s a villain tattoo because they’re ✨different✨like that and Izu freaks out and somehow finds them through that??? This is like half a fic omg i just got carried away😭 feel free to ignore this I just absolutely went off I’m so sorry ily

izu anon…… your mind….. ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL.

i’m utterly in love with this idea.

i feel like the tattoos won’t transfer BUT!! the stencil that they USE for it does!! (ykwim?? the purple/blue ink they use??)

so one silly little day, he’s just relaxing yk. it’s his day off and he is using it to catch up on a show todoroki’s been raving about (which is unusual for todoroki so you KNOW it’s good!!)

our boy has his old ratty blue t-shirt and worn out grey nike shorts on. feet kicked up on his ottoman, his calves exposed. (do you see where i’m headed?)

now— imagine his surprise when he gets up and notices the purple/blue print of a villain on his right calf!!! (im thinking late 80’s)

he genuinely panics— like he’s seen these stencils before— a few were super badass honestly.

BUT A VILLAIN??? A VILLAIN???

he kind of feels sick because like— what if his soulmate is a villain?? (you’re not, you just like tattoos)

he immediately takes a picture of it!! he plans on looking for you— aka stalking every single tattoo artistry page and the people they tag in their posts, also their criminal data bases, and looking at everyone’s right calf when he goes on patrol.

he’s hoping that IF you’re a criminal/villain, he could help you to become— well, NOT that.

he also goes to bakugo about this and asks if he saw anyone get a tattoo of it recently (because bakugo definitely would get tattoos, i just know it. it’d be all skull and fire themes too) (plus he recently got one) bakugo just says, “the fuck? you think i know everyone with a tattoo? what kind of dumb thinking is that?” and poor poor izuku is panicking because he upset bakugo (he actually didn’t, bakugo was just taken aback by the picture) izuku apologizes profusely (bc that’s his thing) and bakugo go just tells him to stfu and that he MIGHT know who tattooed the image because he recognizes the style. sooooo he takes izuku to the parlor and introduces him to…….

YOU!!!!!!! yes, you tattooed yourself!!!!

you’re bakugo’s tattoo artist!!!

“dumbass, show me your right leg” bakugo yells in your small parlor, like an asshole. this makes you roll your eyes— you’re used to him, you’ve been tattooing him since you both were 19, which was when you finished your ‘tattoo training’. “keep talking to me like that and i’ll drop you from my cliental list,” you turn around after you finished sanitizing your station (bc all good artists do!!) “just show me your damn leg for the sake of this idiot,” he points towards izuku, that’s when everything goes in slow motion, and pro hero deku shines bright. he’s omitting a vibrant color and it’s nearly blinding (omg maybe your quirk is seeing/sensing auras)

(also, we’ll just say you’re wearing shorts for the sake of this)

you walk out from behind the barrier of the station and put your right leg on display. that’s when izuku chokes— it’s full of all the stencils he’s seen and… the villain tattoo. “fucking idiot, why would you tattoo a villain on you? you hate them,” bakugo slaps the side of your head, cause he’s an asshole. “cause it’s badass! plus it’s an old school villain, no one really knows ‘em.” you shrug and smack him back, narrowly avoiding his fresh tattoo (you wanted to hit it so bad) “anyways, why did you wanna know? and speak fast cause i have a client coming in twenty.” he forcefully takes izuku’s phone out of his hands, and shows it to you. “why am i looking at a blank screen? bakugo i don’t have time for this,” you push his hand back. “you didn’t let me unlock it,” izuku secretly rolls his eyes, you caught it though. he pulls up his gallery and shows a picture of his leg with your stencil on it.

your eyes narrow— not wanting to believe it cause like, you’re a small business owner and there’s no way a big time hero could be your soulmate. “yeah no, i have no time for bullshit. did someone send you this or something? trying to turn me in for a damn tattoo?” bakugo grumbles bc he’s ANNOYING (i love him) and grabs a pen. “draw something.” “you know i can’t with no reference. i’m shit without one.” “JUST DRAW! ON YOUR HAND! NOW!” “stop yelling all the damn time.” you grumbled and begrudgingly drew a horrible looking bunny. like— absolutely terrible !!! looking bunny onto your hand. bakugo, being the ass he is, RIPS off izuku’s glove and shoves his hand in your face. “bakugo. there’s nothing there. seriously you’re wasting my time, i need to set up. i don’t have time for jokes.” you go back to your station and start getting the ink ready. izuku rolls his eyes again— at his friend, not you. “that was the wrong hand,” he says in a slightly sassy tone, which was funny to hear from a pro hero. izuku takes his OTHER glove off and walks to you. “here,” he places his hand in front of you and you drop your tattooing gun.

“oh,” was all you said before walking into the back of your shop. you screamed a ��what the fuck’ and walked right back out. “well, hi.” your smile is very awkward because like— how are you supposed to respond to that?? it’s not everyday that your soulmate ends up being a pro hero. “uhm… so can we meet after your uhm, next appointment?” he asks, very very shyly, it was like he was a high schooler all over again. you just give a head nod and write your personal number on the back of your business card. “uhm see you.”

months after that fateful day, you and izuku are officially together! he’s drawn you many designs for tattoos. (either for yourself or your clients)

now— izuku may be a very talented artist but when it comes to tattooing? absolutely not. he tried tattooing a small heart in between your fingers as a little practice thing and— let’s just say, it looks like a jacked star. (pls he felt so bad)

while it was a little ugly, you still loved it because he was the one to do it <3

OMG AND THE FIRST TIME YOU TATTOOED HIM— he tried not to cry. like— THIS MF USED TO BREAK HIS BONES DAILY!!! THIS MF FIGHTS BAD GUYS FOR A LIVING!!!! but it’s okay!! not everyone can handle getting a tattoo and that’s perfectly fine!!

ps most of his tattoos are all might hero based.

IZU ANON!!!!! i thoroughly enjoyed this <3

[malleablemusic]

unfortunately, my boyfriend unironically listens to weezer, and has caught wind about this blog. after a month of trying, he has successfully convinced me to use this album for this week's blog. let the record state that i have heard island in the sun before, as aquamarine is one of my favorite movies in the entire world (for anyone wondering, he will now be watching that fantastic piece of cinematic history with me in exchange for this post). anyways, here's my review of weezer's self titled album:

don't let go: 3/5 stars

i love when a man sings "ill be down on my knees" for some reason its just so vulnerable

loving the simp energy he is giving, whole song is just begging so far

this is transforming me into a 14 year old boy with a spiky haircut, learning guitar in my room, suddenly i want to play basketball in my driveway

his voice is very classic, especially for the music genre, but doesn't feel unique enough for me

photograph: 2.9/5 stars

i always love clapping in songs, especially in an intro

such a fun beat, i could dance around my room to this

i think he just liked getting to repeat "re-erect it" over and over

hash pipe: 4.6/5 stars

oh okay raaaangeee!!!! is this a completely different singer

feels like such a different vibe than the first two

what happens when that 14yr old spiky haired kid gets older and gains access to marijuana lmao

i didn't know weezer could be angsty this is great

"you've got your problems / i've got my eyes wide / you've got your big g's / i've got my hash pipe" he's truly speaking words of wisdom

island in the sun: 5/5 stars

it is very hard for me to separate this song from the film that means so very much to me (aquamarine) so i simply will not be

the pure joy and light and love this song exudes its insane

i am instantly transported to a beach, in a bikini and big shirt, hair damp and sun-bleached, off a margarita and dancing in the sunset

i am obsessed with the guitar solo and need to learn how to play just for this

the way he sings "we'll never feel bad anymoreeee" !! IM HEALED

crab: .1/5 stars

okay continuing with the beach theme

brb googling what it means to crab?

according to the internet they're just complaining about the women. ok way to let me down after one of my favorite songs ever

is this just a man upset a woman won't sleep with him

"crab at the booty / 'taint gonna do no good" shutttt uppp ! just shut up (:

this is really gonna lower the album's average huge L for them

knockdown dragout: 2.5/5 stars

lyrics are kind of giving nothing, repetitive

i do enjoy the guitar, they always eat with that, but this is kind of boring

smile: 2.8/5 stars

i like his little belting when he sings "'cause i don't wanna break"

the guitar solos in this album !! even the short ones, so good

follows the common theme i see of wanting a girl to give him a chance...

simple pages: 2.8/5 stars

yup okay another song asking a girl to give him a chance - truly, i get it, and this is a valid form of art you go sir, i just do not see myself listening to this kinda music

i do enjoy pining every once in a while do not get me wrong

another bangin guitar solo

feels like i don't have much to say about this..

glorious day: 3/5 stars

angsty nerdy boy decides its time to finally make a move and ask a girl out

i like these kinds of weezer songs more, the "grittier" sound

giving angry high school band in a battle of the bands competition

o girlfriend: 2/5 stars

i think what i don't like about them is while their sound is good and i enjoy it, the lyrics are truly so generic and not special

i think I said this in an earlier post, and i am not trying to be disparaging, but an AI chatbot could've easily written this in 30 seconds- i just don't believe he's actually hurt and grieving a love, i want to feel the artists genuine pain, this does not sound like a man torn apart

sadly, i was very underwhelmed by this album. to my partner's credit, this is not his favorite of their work, so maybe i will give the rest of their music a try eventually, but for now that was very mid (aside from the perfection that is island in the sun) and i'd give the album 2.7/5 stars.

[iantimony]

this tuesdaypost was drafted on monday, please clap

we are cookin with Gas this week

listening: listened to antimai a few times through, favorite track i think is 'ring 5: middle class'. dorian electra - man to man: really fun video too charasho (benny friedman): was linked in jew chat. very charming and funky. 5 Old French Dances: No. 5. Le Basque (arr. for 2 recorders and harpsichord): i heard this a billion year ago on the radio (my wakeup radio station on my alarm clock is classical) and i finally got around to saving a link for it. very bouncy very cute. makes me think of rabbits running in circles a la beatrix potter.

EDIT TO ADD: i also finally listened to beyonce 'cowboy carter'!! i know im late! it's good i like it! not a revolutionary opinion! obsessed with her jolene cover! that's all!

reading: big one this week! i FINISHED 'the left hand of darkness'! i really liked it! still marinating on the themes etc. i started 'the dispossessed', also by le guin, and am devouring that as well. there's some stuff in there that oof ough. existential. but i'm liking it so far, i'm around chapter 5 right now. physicists!

fanfic: imposter syndrome (mikkeneko): i might have already linked it but i can't be assed to go back through a few weeks of tuesdaypost to see if i already have. so if i did, here it is again. really charming premise, gut-punch of an ending, cool twist on the doppelganger setup from dungeon meshi with svsss.

the articles, some of which were actually read a while ago but i forgot to link and am now cleaning out my phone tabs: how will the golden age of 'making it worse' end? (david roth) new canada policy lets indigenous people reclaim their names (emma bowman) what happens to the stay-at-home girlfriend after a breakup? (erika w smith) unschooling is the parenting trend that's pissing everyone off (ej dickson) in defense of 'coffee badging' (monica torres): if i had a job that was all zoom calls i would literally go insane over being made to go into an office to take zoom calls. fuck that what my mother's wardrobe taught me about style and grief after she died: thinking a lot about all my dad's shit will semen destroy your shower drain? granny davis' geocaching page: found when i was looking at some reviews for caches near my apartment. im kind of obsessed with her. she also has a facebook page called 'granny's geo page' if you don't have a geocaching account. literally she is everything to me. she has found So Many fucking geocaches good god. wedding trivia questions: used as reference to create some wedding trivia for a bridal shower! similarly, the wikipedia page for morganatic marriages my fight with a sidewalk robot (emily ackerman): my school has these. hate them. my boyfriend just linked this to me and im obsessed, laser etched paperweights, i am not a huge paperweight girlie but wowwww prettyyyyy. the electron orbitals!!!! i had a search open for "anti mega #1 cray street". i have no idea what this is.

special edition: the link dump from my trip to the uk last month! some very related to the trip itself, a few random extras! top of the poops, an architectural firm bc i saw a sign with their logo and thought it was cool but now i can't find their logo, waring ader space invaders because i saw someone's shirt with the little space invader guys and was like ooh the tate museum joel meyerowitz (and another page about him) wikipedia on gratin dauphinois, wikipedia page on doncaster for some reason i did not go there list of artworks at the national portrait gallery of scotland wikipedia page on the jacobite uprising of 1745 washi tape that would match the edinburgh one i bought there, tintin in the land of the soviets postcard that i didnt end up getting wikipedia for a quaich which is a traditional scottish bowl, a wiki page on the geology of arthur's seat, a book in the scottish national galleries that i thought about purchasing but didn't want to try and fit in my luggage (she is definitely one of my new favorite artists though) wikipedia page on lauryn hill for some reason not sure how i got there, wikipedia page on salome halpir this post was on tumblr and i tried to find the item in the victoria and albert museum but it was sadly not on display, one of the audio guides i listened to a bit of in the v & a, a scarf i almost bought in the v & a a google search for the fabric library at harrods because my mom mentioned that it existed but i could not find it search for blinq (apparently spelled that way) blossoms because of a cocktail my brother's friend ordered that had one as a garnish wikipedia page on the mechanical explanations of gravitation

watching: from wool to cloth using a historical weaving technique (jillian eve): oughhh colors

emma in the moment/made in the moment: a deep dive into the chunky boy crochet lore the crochet stardew valley pillow drama untangling the shocking tale of mystical creations yarn i tried red heart's new all in one granny square yarn

some crochet tips videos from play hooky with me

tiffanyferg: 'personal style' discourse hgtv is a gentrification masterclass cleantok villains and the morality of messiness

playing: a teeny bit of wizard101

making: fallow. well i guess i drew on some cards for my friend's bridal shower. but generally fallow.

eating: made deb smittenkitchen's delicious carrot cake recipe. mine was a little ugly but really really delicious. i bought a bag of preshredded carrots and just sort of roughly chopped em up a little smaller because i couldn't be assed to grate them. i also couldn't be assed to trim the cakes, i did two smaller round pans and stacked them up but because i didn't trim them they were a little wibbly. oh well.

i'm going to bake another cake for my brother's birthday next weekend and i'm between her chocolate olive oil cake (looks really easy) and bittersweet chocolate and pear cake (a little more involved but highly recommended by bee)

misc: my mom wanted to take a sailing class but didn't want to do it alone so she offered to pay for me to come. sure, said i! i have never sailed! i like learning new skills! reader, it is So Fucking Hot Outside. the wind died and we had to get towed back to shore. the sun was so strong. there are so many ropes with all different names and they all Do Something. sunday's class got cancelled/rescheduled because the weather was That Bad (hot as fuck and no wind) so we're doing it probably friday instead (and saturday. and sunday. it's two weekends in a row of both days at 9am yayyyyy) but i just hope the weather is. better.

[lovinggreeniehours]

🎫 here's a gush pass ^^ feel free to gush about whichever f/o you want, however much you want, then send this ask to 3 other self shippers! (@comfortingstars)

this isn't really a gush but i wanted an excuse to ramble without getting embarrassed hfshjhddj i might not be very coherent, and all of this is just me talking to myself (about arifive) so i can organize my thoughts

okay firstly, i am rewatching season 3. it is such a giant shitshow. honestly. hfshjfdhhdh now the thing is, the plot threads are so tightly knit together (same can be said for the whole show, really) that ive always found it difficult to self insert into it. which is why ari doesn't play too much of a role besides being five's self-appointed meatshield lol

i am rolling with it and making it related to his character arc throughout the story, but i also thought, what if i scrap him altogether? 🤔 what if he was still in the first apocalypse? we do see in the s4 trailer that we might get to see it again through the time-traveling subway(?) so the idea of arifive reunion there sounds. hmmmmmm. but then again that would present a lot of issues like awkward age gap that just. doesn't feel like their style i guess

that idea, i realize, is also just going to be scrapped right away though. five would never leave him there to begin with. that's the entire basis of their relationship 😭

however that does leave ari as a hanging thread with nowhere to go again. ive tried my best not to speculate too hard so i can roll with the flow as s4 comes out (in less than a week :DD) but i really do wonder. in any case ari's presence there, i feel like, would already create colossal differences to the canon events simply because he's there? 😭 five might not behave the same way because of that and now i have to rewrite the entire series. which is such a pain. honestly

like a lot of problems would be solved so fast if ari was there 😒 not to toot my own horn or anything hfshjfsfhj but i do mean it. like the many times five gets hurt and shot at would be solved very quickly, since ari would be affected by neither of that. that is a major problem on this show in general i think. it relies too much on the inconvenience of it all. they keep all their main characters busy and distracted so they're never on the same page, and therfore they all deal with shit by themselves for 10 episodes when they could've solved the problem in 1 by just talking to each other for more than 3 minutes,,,

this show is so so annoying actually how am i supposed to walk around saying "i like this show" when that is sooo not true i am the umbrella academy's number 1 hater at this point 💀 but also i have extensive knowledge of the characters, lore, and plot that is basically burned into my skull. yes i hate this show i swear

one way i had wanted to give ari his own plot (his main theme is of him growing into his own person after his childhood was cut short, after all) was his doppelganger, morgan, in the sparrow academy but im so lost on whether or not she's dead at the end of the season,,,💀 like sure TWO sparrows survived to the finale. out of SEVEN. and then one of them lived until the end (but he's ben so we're unsure about why he's here), but the other one????? no one knows where the hell she went???????? and the season 4 promo doesn't mention her at all 😭 😭 😭 😭 im so confused okay

one thing i definitely had wanted to touch on when i flesh out ari's arc is his powers. they are so complex and personally one of my favorite concepts ever. the power itself is actually rather simple in concept, just hard to explain

but assuming that there are multiple timelines and dimensions in the universe, ari's powers make it so that he is spiritually connected to all his other selves. at least, more so than the average person would be. this is why he doesn't die! if everyone else's souls are split into all their different variants', ari's variants have one soul connected together like a giant web. even if you cut one string, you still have the web, and it can still be rebuilt. therefore, he can never really be processed as dead (unless he cuts the string himself, but he doesn't know that)

that has always been so interesting to think about for me, and how that impacts his character, because then even his power is a direct parallel to five's. five is the traveler of time and space, meaning he can go anywhere he wishes. ari, meanwhile, is already there. always has been, always is, always will be

i was going to build up on that in season 3 and 4, since morgan is one of his variants but. 💀 um. she might have been wiped from existence altogether so i don't really know if that counts as killing her

tldr this show is stupid. it's so stupid it makes its characters stupid by proxy. if i put myself, a non-stupid person, there, there would be no more plot :( i am sad. but i will carry on with my watching because i need to see my husband very badly

[afklancelot]

recently got into HOL and my silly autism brain has taken the reigns with this book. anyways i would (capital L) Love to hear your theories/hidden symbolism notes on this book if youre willing to share

hello yea id love to! doubt it will be coherent at all cuz i didnt take notes but ill do my best

one of the more prevalent theories of HoL is that Pelafina is the true author of the book. The fact that "A Novel" text on the front page, the "First Edition" text, and the text Johnny uses just before getting into the baby story is purple, and Pelafina often being associated with purple, is definitely not a coincidence. In addition, the baby story being about a mother and her dying baby alludes to Pelafina and Johnny, implying Johnny never existed, at least as an adult (either he died as a baby/stillborn, or his mother actually succeeded in strangling him as a kid). One of Pelafina's coded letters (there's at least two if i remember correctly) also mentions Zampano, so it's plausible that Zampano was Pelafina's lover and later disappeared from her life, and Pelafina integrated him into the book she was writing.

A bit minor in terms of symbolism, but notably the word "changeling", according to the index, is only used two times: one in Johnny's section, and one in Pelafina's section. Johnny's a changeling in that he makes up stories to protect himself: pretend to be someone he's not, and he never told anyone, at least in LA, about his actual childhood. Pretty obvious, yes. Pelafina's also a changeling as well using the "Pelafina is the true author and Johnny was dead all along/never existed to begin with", in that she acts like johnny is alive by sending letters to him, when in reality he was killed by her/died in birth/never existed. She pretends to be someone she's not by acting like a mother, in other words.

That said, while I see the Pelafina author theory as the most plausible theory for HoL, i kinda ignore it cuz imagining a world w/o Johnny Truant makes me sad :,)

a connecting theme for all of HoL is obsession. Will obsesses over the house's changing architecture, Holloway obsesses over a potential beast within the labyrinth, Johnny obsesses over the manuscript of The Navidson Record, hell, even Karen expresses obsession in trying to ignore the house (through Feng Shui and whatnot). And of course, there's what happens when obsession takes hold, best seen in Will and Karen neglecting their kids and each other (Will moreso), Holloway's refusal to abandon a 'mission' and shooting Jed thinking the latter was the beast, Johnny not going outside his apartment for days on end and losing time, not seeing his friends at all, you get the drift. We the readers even emulate it, obsessing over the book, what it meant, and what actually was real or not. It's only when Will burns the book be brought, House of Leaves, that things start to take a turn for the better: he lets go of his obsession of the house, Karen rescues him, and they live a happier life away from the house. Also seen when Johnny meets the band who shows him the book as well, as the very last passage in chronological terms has him finding closure over finding the book in the band's hands ("It's going to be alright. It's going to be alright"). not rlly hidden symbolism or a theory but i always love talking bout the obsession theme and stuff.

also one more thing: Johnny thinks the number nine is connected with him, and seeing his math i can't disagree. what's interesting, and i found out only recently from going thru the eht namuh website, is that the number nine in the Bible is a symbol of finality and completeness (as a TF fan, this statement feels ironic). His musing pops up around his final chapter he actually appears in the book, where while it does leave him w an ambiguous ending, it also completes his story arc, including giving him some closure. idk where im going with this but it's just something neat.

[eridan-amporaa]

Oh also idk if this goes on this blog or the SM one but-

Spooky Month Classpects

Roy strikes me as a Rage player and Ross is a Rogue

(augh it's been so long since I've read the comic, I've forgotten most of my Classpect knowledge-)

SO GUESS WHOS BEEN THINKIN ABOUT THIS FOR SEVERAL MONTHS-

OK SO.

im just gonna name all the characters imma classpect: skid, pump, hatzgang, susie, streber, kevin, ethan, radford. I'm disregarding gender-locked classes, idgaf about the gender locks. if a fem locked class fits a dude, congrats, hes gettin it anyway. feel free to add in ur own 2 cents or other charas im v curious!!

puttin this under the cut cuz its gonna be LONG.

SKID - ironically, im havin a really hard time with him. aspect wise, i could see him being hope or doom, seeing as he so often seems to bring bad news but is so painfully optimistic. but he could just as easily be light, with the focus on his weirdly fantastic luck. if i had to guess, id put him down as an Heir of Light - insanely lucky, decent fighter, and not really concsiously manipulating his aspect so much as just kinda rolling with it.

PUMP - easy. Seer of Void. fits with all his voidy theming and ties to Eyes. hes seeing all the secrets, finding out all the shit hes not supposed to know. sounds abt right.

ROY - definitely a rage player. As for class, i can see him going a couple different ways (knight, heir, thief) but im gonna go with Thief of Rage for him. harnessing the power of the anger of those around him to fuel his own power and anger? sounds abt right!

ROSS - ur right abt his class, rogue fits him well. as for aspect, id have to go with mind, seeing as hes prolly the smartest/most skeptical of the gang. so that would make him a Rogue of Mind.

ROBERT - aspect could be heart or hope, but hope fits him better so lets go with that. class wise i could see him easily being a sylph or witch, but imma give him Witch of Hope here. still able to spread his aspect, but also being able to manipulate it in a more direct way than a sylph.

SUSIE - ok so right off the bat heart player. it just fits ok I dont make the rules. as for class... I feel like she'd end up more active here, and she has a thing abt protecting herself which I'm p sure extends to skid n pump, maybe the hatzgang too if she got close to em. so I'd put her as a Knight of Heart.

KEVIN - ok kevin is. hm. I feel like he could be a couple different aspects - doom, for the same reasons as skid, or maybe life? idk he just seems like a life player to me I'm goin with that. as for class... ehhhh? idk, hes kinda hard to class. honestly if anything I think page would fit him best with the whole "find urself n ur aspect" thing so let's just go with Page of Life.

STREBER - streber comes off as a space player to me. idk why he just does. maybe it's the vamp thing? actually all the space players have some sort of transformation thing maybe hed become an actual vamp... hm... well anyway I'm classpecting him as a Mage of Space. idk it just fits

ETHAN - ethan would make a good doom player I think, again just kinda fits. imma go with Maid of Doom, he would use his knowledge of doom n gloom stuff to help tidy up loose ends and keep things stable.

RADFORD - time player. he seems like hed be able to MAYBE handle timeline bullshit, but more relevant to his class is that he might feel like hes always running low on time. Prince of Time. being forced to destroy remnants of other timelines and trying so hard not to destroy the canon one. ough I could give him SO much angst.

[yazzydream]

part 2 of parts im excited to see in Shibuya Incident arc. (pt. 1 here)

manga SPOILERS ahead.

i love how freaking dramatic and supernatural this feels. that baby opening his eyes with clarity and awareness is creepy af. i loveeee it.

the entire flashback with the curse user scrubs is actually creepy and gritty and excellent all around. but this scene...

im not even gonna pretend. i have a colored version of this page as my phone bg. i. will. scream. little!gojo looks like hot shit. a very scary hot shit.

legitimately the cutest panel akutami has ever drawn ever.

i don't even like toji! but how dare you resurrect his body's information to control his abilities! this man was a piece of shit, but his body and abilities therein were the only good things about him damnit. toji taking over the body of the one who tried to use him and murdering granny ogami was v satisfying. (also, going further into the discussion between body+soul is such an interesting theme in jjk.)

brief but beautiful nanami/nobara working together. this is an unusual team up kinda? let nobara watch a real man work. ugh, nanami and nobara are in my top 6 characters.

uggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and then we know what happens to theeeeemmmm. im gonna be sick

all three of those people... (maybe all four? lol) are, well. anyway, this moment of lucidity... this is a moment of enlightenment. it's so antithesis to shonen heroes. i think it's great. (again, ties into my post of why i love yuji.)

This is another favorite scene of mine. it's so bizarre. lol

ugh, naobito's powers are cool as shit. i'm looking forward to seeing how animators animate animation powers. lol.

maki is also my main girl, so seeing her team up with nanami... just nanami + team zenin is cool and funny. it's like the straight man dropped in the middle of a dysfunctional family reunion.

happiness that i got to see him directly interact with my favorite ladies before... well.

seeing dagon and remembering grasshopper curse, and the both of them look like they came right on over from chimera ant arc in hunter x hunter. which is another one of my all time favorite arcs in shonen. great. shibuya incident is such a great arc!

my girl maki is 16-years-old. all this time, and in this fight too, there have been doubts, she must fight against it all the time, doubts that she can be as strong as any grade 1 sorcerer. she was alone, and yet. AND YET, here she sees toji who's just like her. it must've been reaffirming. it must've been encouraging! ahhh. toji being good for something for once in his life--death-- whatever.

ah ah ah ahh! this was so shocking! after all that, jogo comes and bodies nanami, maki, and naobito just like that.

one of the few moments where sukuna popping up made me wanna scream. fuck this is such a good shot. the arrogant condescending demand and expression. i could hear his voice. 💦💦💦

yikes. YIKES. YIKES. FUCKING BRUTAL. I WANNA SCREAM. it's just been ONE. THING. AFTER. ANOTHER. AHHHHH

...i'm beginning to wonder if i'm a bit of a sadist? ...nah. i just appreciate a good story. 😤 also mimiko and nanko showing up was a pleasant surprise. i've always liked their designs.

sukuna just fucking with them makes me laugh every time. THERE WAS NO POINT TO THIS. BASTARD WAS JUST HAVING FUN AT THEIR EXPENSE OMG. what a shit.

there's always something charming about flashbacks between megumi and gojo. then there's the little self-deprecation of megu's here too. idk idk! megumi is never complimentary about gojo except in these rare moments where he's thinking to himself, we get glimpses of his reliance on gojo. like, i remember in the yasohachi bridge case when megumi thought something like, 'gojo's coming back in a week, i can ask him for help.' very small moments that hint at their relationship.

also these little flashback sequences are all we're gonna get of gojo until like season 4, so i'll enjoy them wherever i can. lol.

i didn't particularly care about mahoraga until he showed up later, but rereading this appearance again is pretty exciting. and then megumi says, 'aight i'm out. take care of it yourself, fucker.' before passing out from blood loss. lmao

"hey brat, take a look." what a sadistic fuck.

the raw shock and devastation is incredible. i hope it's just as terrible in the anime.

cont. in part 3

[shoezuki]

Hey, Egg, I wanted to ask you a question related to fanfic writing if that's ok with you? I wanted to ask how do you plan your fanfics. Like, do you have a general structure you use? Or just go with the flow?

Asking bcz I saw your post on the background of the doc for ch 10 and got curious abt how you go abt planning, whether it be a oneshot or a chapter.

Sorry if its an odd question to ask 😅

Its np!!!! I love talkin bout anything fic related ngl. But to be honest i have next to No structure beksvssyd.

Im typically a oneshot type of writer where i do individual fics part of a bigger series such as the divinity au because for me i want some form of overarching topic/theme/AU without rigidly having a major story in place. Most often i have specific scenes/ideas in mind that are part of a bigger series or related to previous things. Tbh the doctor fic is an anomaly for me. I tend to abandon multi ch things out of losing interest.

I typically 'go with the flow' BUT have major scenes or plotpoints in mind. For the doctor fic i at first imagined it at 6 chapters in terms of major points in the story. Like ch 1: sampo leaving/finding gepard. Ch 2: them connecting/talking and getting closer, gepard's wound getting worse. Ch 3: the fragmentum amalgamation fight and sampo taking gep back to the city. Ch.4: gepards pov and finding sampo... etcetc. But i Obviously have a lot more chapters however the major plot points i imagined remain. There just happens to be more build up and plot in between major 'points'.

Time to get nerdy but in general this is how i think of my fics and anything i write: i block out the story in my head and what i want to convey in terms of key scenes. Kinda similar to the classic narrative structure/fraytag's pyramid but by conceptualizing the 'order' of major scenes between the First scene and the Final scene. W the doctor fic i have an idea of All major scenes ive written and will write, but also each chapter has this same format.

Usually this is All in my head tbh but for doctor fic im trying to actually do a shitty sort of outline w bullet points. Like for instance for ch 9 it went something like:

Gepard leaves to the underworld without telling anyone

He doesnt know what to do and goes to natasha's clinic first

Natasha doesn't trust him but realizes gepard actually cares/worries for sampo and shows him sampo in her office

Discussion of how he got there, nat's distrust of him/silvermanes

The badges.

Gepard falls asleep, wakes up and realizes lynx n serval were texting him

Gep goes home and serval chews him out. He tells serval about sampo

Lynx is passed out and gepard falls asleep beside her

Those are the 'big' portions i wanted to write, and then i add more points between and as im writing i go with whatever feels right to go from point A to point B. With other fics/chapters i have swapped around order of major scenes and ommitted some but i Always try to keep the beginning and the end fairly solid.

..... idk if any a this is helpful vslddgsjd. Like i really do keep most of everything in my head and rarely do i really like... outline or do a draft of these things. Altho the biggest thing i really Really am set on and would argue is most important is that. When writing a multi chapter thing or something with a bigger story to it, know your ending from the beginning. For one, having your ending essentially set in stone makes it much easier to build up to it and ensures the ending feels proper and satisfying. But also, at least for me, knowing how it ends makes it easier to stay interested/engaged with it.

W the doctor fic, how it ends is something ive known from the beginning. I technically have written beyond the ending even. Tbh if i had no end in sight i think id feel listless w it and probably drop it by now

Oh also. I like changing background colours of my pages and the fonts cuz it makes the documents look cool n i like tryna pick a bg colour that Feels like the chapter/fic :)