#im about 15 months into my conversion journey

[overmorrowpine]

okay this might be a little bit silly considering i almost never cry but im like halfway to crying about this cookbook having notes like "this is a pareve version. for a meat version, substitute meat stock and add cubed beef" or whatever (im looking through soups for dinner rn) like. i don't have to do the work to make sure the recipe is kosher. someone else has already made sure it's kosher. my family has gotten it basically (like, they don't cook their bacon in the same pan as im gonna use for my eggs, stuff like that) but like. it's not on me to make sure i can eat this food. someone else has already done it

[angstysebfan]

PR Stunt Gone Wrong - Chapter 30 (end)

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Summary: You are a fellow actress in the MCU, Bucky’s love interest. You met Seb during the CA: WS and you guys hit it off. Chemistry on and off the set, but never dated until after Infinity War. During filming of FATWS, the pandemic caused everything to shut down. Seb offered you to spend quarantine with him, but somewhere along the lines, things go wrong and Seb makes a PR decision.

A/N: I was going to to this in a Bucky story, but then I decided to keep it Seb. With everything going on with Seb over the last several months, I came up with this story in my head. Obviously a lot of this is made up, but it is using what we know Seb has been doing over the last several months.

One Year Later

You walk onto the set of the new Avengers movie, ready to get back to work in the MCU. It’s been a busy year for you. You filmed a few movies, and were nominated for an Oscar for one of your previous rolls, but didn’t win. Now you get to work with your Marvel family and you were excited. 

You walk into your trailer to see your assistant, “Morning Jen!” you say as you throw your bag on the couch. “Morning Y/N! Here is your shooting schedule, your coffee, and you are due in hair and make up in 15,” she says with a warm smile. You smile in return feeling like everything has returned to somewhat normalcy. Just then you hear a knock on your trailer door. You open it to see Seb there smiling, “May I walk you to hair and make up?” he asks. You give him a warm smile, “Sure,” you say before waving goodbye to Jen and walking out the door. 

After that day you said goodbye to Seb, you both took a long break from each other. You both got busy with projects and shoots, but after about 6 months apart, you ran into each other in New York. You were walking Tucker, who grew so much and was more dragging you through the streets. You saw Sebastian walking out of the coffee shop and you both saw each other and stopped dead in your tracks. You gave him a small wave, which he returned and walked toward you.

After talking for a few minutes, Seb offered to walk you back to your apartment, taking the leash from you. You both caught up during the walk and agreed to keep in touch. Over the last 6 months, you both texted regularly and called each other 2-3 times a week. You decided that friendship was the best way to move forward with Seb, though you know your feelings for him never truly went away. Baby steps, you told yourself.

You can’t even keep count of the amount of times you both talked until you fell asleep on the phone. He always gave you sound advice, and you tried to do the same. You both dated somewhat, but nothing serious. Seeing him now, back on set, you are happy you mended things with him. 

You walk to the hair and make up trailer was quiet, but comfortable. You wanted to ask if he read the review on Ale’s latest movie. She finally got a roll in an American movie, just like she wanted. The movie bombed in the box office, and she got a terrible review. You also heard she threw a fit when pap pictures of you and Seb walking around New York popped up. You couldn’t help but smirk when you read it. You decided to not bring it up to him, since you were both starting over.

As you are about to get into the trailer, your phone rings for a Facetime with Chase. You show Seb, who smirks and you answer, having the camera on both of you. Chase’s face pops up, “Hey! There are my 2 favorite people!” he says. You laugh, “Hey Chase! How’s everything going with you?” you ask. He smiles, “Good! I uh... I got a girl,” he says. “What!?” you and Seb say together.

Chase laughs, “Yea, she is pretty cool. I can’t wait for you both to meet her,” he says. “Well I’m happy for you! I’m sorry to cut this short, but we are running into hair and make up. I’ll call you later to learn more about this girl,” you say. “Sounds good, bye guys,” he says before hanging up.

You and Chase stayed friends after your talk with him in LA. He understood where you came from, and supported your decision to not choose him or Seb. He had taken himself out of the equation anyway, but wanted you to be happy. He talked to you about what to say to Seb and how he thought he would react. He helped you prepare for what you knew was a hard conversation.

A lot has changed over the last year. Seb got a new better team at CAA, and he made it very clear that he is never doing a PR relationship again. You fired your manager, though she apologized profusely and cried, you sent her packing. You decided not to go with CAA, but was signed by another reputable agency. You have quite a few big projects that could be big things for you in the next year and are so excited.

You and Seb walk into the trailer and sit in your seats, getting ready for the long day of shooting. Once you are done, you go to head back to your trailer, when Seb grabs your hand. “Hey, I wanted to ask you something,” he says, looking into your eyes. “Sure, what’s up?” you ask.

He takes a deep breath, “I... I wanted to know if you...” he falters, suddenly nervous. Your heart rate goes through the roof, “Seb? You can ask me,” you say trying to stay calm. He takes another deep breath, “Will you go out to dinner with me? Like... a date?” he asks. You knew that was the question, but it still hit you like a mac truck.

Were you ready to give Seb another chance? It has been over a year since you were together, and only 6 months since you started talking again as friends. Even though you have been taking baby steps with him, you know you still love him. But can you trust him? “Um... yeah, sure,” you say with a shy smile. Seb gives you a wide smile.

“But, that doesn’t mean I am ready to be in a relationship with you,” you say pointing your finger at him. “I know, but I am willing to take this slow. Let you see that I am ready, and that you are the one for me,” he says before kissing your cheek. “I’ll see you on set,” he says before heading toward his trailer.

You turn and walk slowly, like in a daze, toward your trailer, you hand touching your cheek where he kissed you. You walk in and see Jen has your costume laid out and ready for you. She looks at your face and smiles, “What’s with you? You ok?” she asks with a smirk. 

You look at her and give her a smile. “Yea. I think everything is going to be just fine,” you say with a laugh.

--

Chapter 29

Well that’s it. I know there wasn’t much talk about Ale, but I added in her not so happy ending. Also if you are pissed that there is potential for the reader and Seb to end up together, I left it open ended so you can decide yourself if they will if they will continue to date or one and done. Thank you for being on this crazy fiction/nonfiction journey! Feedback is appreciated!

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[xstarlightthemoonwolfx]

Finally reunited

Albedo x reader (oc)

♡❁*❁*♡

Albedo x f! s/o Sum: s/o is an alchemist like albedo ,s /o also is albedo's partner in the alchemy ,they work together under albedo's master hands,when albedo is send to Mondstadt ,s/o have go with him and stayed for a few weeks ,but it seem like their master had other plans for the female alchemist,and she was soon send to Liyue ,even with that they still contact each other though letters for many years, after another wonderful successful year of research s/o was finally finished her duties as the alchemist of Liyue,her alchemy at Liyue has reached its end,and the night of Christmas eve .s/o decided to met up with the acting grand master jean and tell her how she want to work with the master of alchemist albedo ,jean take the offer ,not knowing that you knew albedo before and that night on Christmas Eve was the night albedo and his Darling s/o met again and will never leave too.❁*ﾟEnjoy❁*ﾟ

'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪

s/o was standing in front of the gates to the City of freedom Mondstadt,she had just left Liyue two days ago.s/o was so excited about working with albedo as his partner once again,the guards was nice checking if your somewhat dangerous thing that could bring harm to the people of Mondstadt.but of course you easily got in.walking your way to the see master jean .....but you got lost,you were looking around and finally you decide to ask for help it was at this moment (that he knew he f***ed up) someone bump into you you and that person quickly stand up and apologies even if you did nothing wrong ,when you were younger you have habits of apologizing even if it your fault and albedo always said that was a cute trait of yours,even if you were sorry your monotone made it hard for others to accept the apologize.Now back to reality,you looked at the person and it was a boy around 15 blond hair Honey eyes with a cute human kid like flying companion .you asked the boy where was he heading only to find out he going to see master jean s/o told the boy that she was looking for jean as well but you got lost ,the boy who you know is the traveler the hero that saved Mondstadt & Liyue ,help you to see jean as a apologize for bumping into you. With only few minutes we have arrived at jean's office.

Aether and paimon which you could they learn their names while walking to knights of favonius HQ, walked into jeans office only to come out with some papers and talking with each other something about hunting monsters like slimes ect...s/o The traveler and his companion for disappearing behind the office door.Aether and paimon quickly left us together some important ingredients for the Christmas Eve celebration at the knights of favonius HQ thank you to the knights for their hard work protecting the city. As you walked in Jean open her mouth and start talking to you(J=jean s/o= significant other) J:"greetings , you must be the new Tourist in town". s/o:"indeed it's a great honor to finally meet you master Jean" J:"please Jean is just fine , may I know your name?" s/o:"ah, my apologies where are my matters, I'm s/o Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour" s/o said in a monotone voice while she bow in front of jean,Jean was surprised to hear the Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour came to visit Mondstadt and to see her in such a cold month of the year. J:"please stand up, may I ask what brings you here?and why shouldn't be at Liyue?" s/o:"as you see i finish my research at Liyue and also want to add more mystery of the world to my book ,so i think Mondstadt would be a good place to stay for now." s/o:"I came here for proposal I was wondering if I can work with the Chief alchemist of the knights of favonius Albedo?" Jean almost fainted by the proposal that Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour offered. J:"and may i ask why?" Trying to keep her position without jumping in joy ,s/o open hear lips to answer Jean's questions.while that was happening Albedo in the other hand was in the village buying supplies for his experiment, walking though the crowd and stopping to buy some seed in a flower shop accidentally over hearing a conversation between the shopkeeper and a young woman,"did you know that Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour announce that she has finished her researchers in Liyue,and she decided to go on a journey to research more?","really? I heard that she was a beautiful girl with a genius mind too","I heard that too people in Liyue said that its true but I guess we'll never know","I also heard from people who had with our Chief alchemist of the knights of favonius Albedo that her alchemist is the same level as Albedo". Albedo quickly snap out of his thinking about the mysterious Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour,and paid for the seed only to find out its free just for him Albedo walked out of the shop just for him to think about this mysterious other Chief alchemist,the problem is that you ,s/o had never mentioned anything about you being THE Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour . So he's going to be in for a surprise tonight at the Christmas eve celebration.Back to s/o,you had just finished talking to Jean about your proposal ,which jean accepted the offer.s/o was invited to the Christmas eve celebration as a way to welcome and also introduce you to everyone else. s/o walked around town to buy some food, having fun as she had never been on a day without work before so she's trying to enjoy it as possible.

Night have arrived,and you? You were still in your everyday outfit but for others they called it the lab outfit since you never actually had a day off so the Lab outfit is like your daily outfit,you were never really cared about your outfit so you just walked to the knights of favonius HQ . walking in you ask the other knights that was invited to the party were it was they told you the way as they left to buy some needs for them or for the party,as you walked closer to the door you hear chatting, you knock on the door hearing a light "ah ,that might be our new member!", you said"hey ,jean can i come in?"still in your monotone.On the other side of the door, Albedo really didn't want to come but if it was for klee happiness he'll do anything aside from that Albedo was also wondering like other knights including Aether ,paimon and not surprisingly venti what the new member looks like or their background or how they got in was a mystery to them ,a knock was heard and jean let out"ah ,that might be our new member!" and responding to her was a light "hey ,jean can i come in?" the door muffled the person voice only for the words to be heard only ,jean said"yes ,you can . Everyone i want you to met our new member she going to be working with albedo from now on" jean had surprise everyone in the room,as the door open everyone eyes was on the that person though the door. You look at the people in front and seeing Albedo had make your eyes shine and more colourful with the red blood like iris it had,"Hello everyone, I'm s/o Chief alchemist of Liyue harbour I'm happy to-" before you can finish your words , Albedo hug you tightly pulling you and him to the ground. everyone was lost for words at Albedo's action.Albedo then ask you"So.... what is it?".you reply "huh?" .then to remember the moment before you left him to visit Liyue .

*flashing* "I'm missing you already" Albedo said in a sad tone ,only you can bring his emotions out"I'll promise when im done we'll met again, Albedo", Albedo pulling you into a hug and kiss you softly and said "when you're back let me know if you want to be my Prinzessin? But for now think about it" it was the last thing you remember leaving you surprised before the cart leave for Liyue*end*.

Albedo looking at your eyes it was the most interesting thing that he never ever get bored of. Albedo ask you"so I'll ask again, will you s/o be my Prinzessin(princess) to honor my title as the Kreideprinz?".s/o breaking her emotionless Act by smiling softly, that smile of yours could kill Albedo but he'll still be happy,s/o was more than happy that she could Only find five words.s/o start crying this wasn't sad tears,no...it was the same happy tears that fall down that day when you found out Albedo feels the same about you, Albedo worries ask your tears fall down he was scared that he did something wrong .s/o open her lips and Said"YES!a million times yes!"hugging Albedo tightly, Albedo on the other hand was satisfied by your answer, cupping your cheeks and pulling you into a heated kiss.

'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪❁꫶͙ꪳᬽ'ꫂ͙ꨩ⃟͙˖⃟꒰ ཻུ۪۪

Wow that was LONG but hope you enjoy my first ever one shot on Tumblr!♡❁*

[cicada-bones]

QoS Timing Notes

So, I finally got around to making a complete summary, day by day, of the events of QoS in Aelin’s and Rowan’s pov. I just wanted to post this here on the off chance that anyone else wanted to use it (and all of the extra details are approximate, but they are what - in my opinion - makes the most sense math-wise, so you don’t need to read WaTW to use these points if you want) ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎

bullets under the cut:

Aelin leaves for Rifthold and Rowan heads back for Mistward

(the end of HoF) for our purposes, this is Day 1

Day 9 (approx.)

Lorcan leaves Maeve, stealing the ring (to allow for time to travel from Doranelle, past Mistward, and to the coast)

Day 11 – Lorcan passes by Mistward (night)

Day 12

Rowan catches the scent and leaves Mistward, heading for the coast Lorcan boards a ship that day (meaning he arrives in Rifthold less than a day ahead of Rowan)

Day 13 – Rowan boards a ship headed for Rifthold

The journey takes approx. 2-3 weeks, so Aelin likely arrives sometime around Day 14, im leaving this one a bit vague This is also approximately the day of Maeve’s conversation with Gavriel and Fenrys (in my fic) The reason I like Day 14 as her arrival, as it means that both Aelin and Rowan have approximately 2 week trips that way

Days 14-25 Aelin is alone in Rifthold

14 – she meets with Arobynn, chaol, returns to apartment (chapters 1-7) 15 – meets Lys and Evangeline (morning), then Chaol and the guards in the shadow market (evening) then goes to the bank (chapters 9-11) 16 – summoned to assassin’s keep, then bank again, meeting with Lys, talk with chaol and nesryn where they stop the executions (chapters 13-14) 17 – saves Aedion (chapters 15-19) 18 – talk with Aedion (chapter 22) time jump – three days 21 – fight in the Vaults (chapter 22-24) 22 – conversation with Aelin and Aedion, then Chaol joins to plan, Aelin discovers the Wyrdhounds (chapters 26-27) another time jump – 2 more days

Day 25 (chapters 27-29)

Lorcan arrives in Rifthold – morning Rowan arrives in Rifthold – evening Aelin/Aedion/Nesryn go out for drinks Rowaelin reunion Aedion confrontation/1st nightgown scene Lorcan has already tracked Rowan to Aelin’s apartment and discovered them together by this point, because he sees them sleeping in the same bed this night (because by the next night, he makes a comment about it)

Day 26 (chapter 29/33-36)

Training scene, Lys visits, Chaol visits Then that afternoon Aelin shows Rowan around Rifthold (fluff) Evening – Aelin drags Lorcan into the sewers, with Wyrdhounds Confrontation between Aelin/lorcan/Rowan (night)

Day 27 (Chapter 38-39)

Evening, eating dinner when Lys joins them Night – Rowan and Aelin visit the Wyrdhound, capture the Valg (stevan) and cuts off its hand Aelin sneaks out (presumably to visit the shadow market and bank again)

Day 28 (chapter 39/41-44)

Visit Sam’s grave Puts on the oil, dragon dress scene They torture the demon, dinner with Arobynn, he puts the ring on Aelin Lys, Rowan, and Aedion have a conversation in the living room Aelin/Rowan explain their plan to Aedion Aelin/rowan discuss the wyrdkey Aelin stands watch in the rain “don’t touch me like that” scene

Day 29 (chapter 46-47/49)

Visit the assassin’s keep (celaena’s last stand) They make sure Arobynn is really dead End of part 1 Conversation between Aelin and Aedion Rowan goes hunting for Lorcan (tracks him around the city, doesn’t find him) 2nd nightgown scene – Rowan tries to talk to her, she shuts him down

Day 30 (chapter 49-50/52)

Aelin/Lys get information from the bakery woman Rowan, Aedion, Nesryn, and Chaol – all waiting outside (awkward af) Go under the shadow market (hellfire) – and into the Sin-Eater’s temple, info about Erawan Spies confirm that the army is being raised in Morath, they all talk (evening) Lorcan catches up with Aelin and Rowan – tells them about the ring, and his plans for Maeve and the keys (meaning that Lorcan spent 3 days being chased by the Wyrdhounds, and leading them awry) Rowan and Aelin finally get their shit together – first kiss, neck bite (almost) meaning it took only 5 days for Rowan to completely cave in to Aelin

Day 31 (chapter 55-56)

Evangeline breaks in – tells them about what happened to Lys ‘a few hours later’ they were in an inn in the city, planning (1/2 a mile from Temis’ temple – so the meetup is very close to Rifthold)

Day 32 (Chapter 57-61)

They save Lys Confrontation with Manon Rowan is hit with the arrow (Aelin realizes they are mates – doesn’t say anything) They go to Nesry’s father’s country house

Day 33 (Chapter 64) - Time jump

Day 34 (Chapter 64) - Night - Planning, Aelin/Aedion/Rowan

Day 35 (Chapter 64) - Aelin releases Lys from her debts to Clarisse

Day 36 - Skipped – time jump (planning)

Day 37 (Chapter 65)

Night – conversation between Rowan and Lorcan, hands over the fake Wyrdkey (Lorcan scents Aedion/Gavriel) Conversation between Aelin and Chaol (finally come to an understanding/forgiveness) “you make me want to live” rowaelin scene

Day 38 (Chapter 66-79/83)

They see the message from Manon and change their plans Lys and Evangeline head for safety, Chaol and Aelin head into the castle, Aedion and Rowan head through the sewers with the hellfire Lorcan presumably has a moment where he decides to go save them, after earlier choosing to set the Wyrdhounds on them The big battle Lorcan steals back the ring, and disappears Aelin makes her speech in front of the city – cries, then passes out Lysandra vomits on Lorcan, Rowan and Lorcan have a conversation

Days 39/40/41 (covered in summary in chapter 83)

Aelin sleeps for three days Rowan sat by her – presumably heals Chaol’s back during this time Aedion takes control of the castle

Days 42 (Chapter 83)

Aelin wakes up, they kiss and make up Aelin and Dorian have a convo Chaol and Dorian have a convo – plans for southern continent (might be the next day – not specified)

Day 43 (Chapter 86/88)

In the morning, Aelin and Rowan go back to her apartment to get the real wyrdkey, and the golden right for Lysandra from the jeweler – the last time she ever goes there) Aelin gives Lysandra the ‘Lord’ title After dinner, all of our gang has a convo together in Aelin’s room Night – final conversation between aelin/chaol/dorian

Day 44 (Chapter 88

They leave Rifthold Journey north takes three weeks before they reach the border (day 65) END OF QoS

Day 58 – Gavriel and Fenrys board a ship to Skull’s Bay (that’s how it works out math-wise, approximately)

Day 65 – our party reaches the border with Terrasen

Day 68 - meeting with Darrow (beginning of EoS)

Day 70 – Rowan saves Dorian from the attack

Day 73-4 – Rowan and Dorian arrive in Skulls bay

Where Gavriel and Fenrys are already waiting for them

In summary, the entirety of QoS takes place over about a month, with most of the content taking place within like a week of that time (days 25-32) other than the big battle which happens a week later on day 38

(i included the fenrys/gavriel notes for my own purposes - so i guess just ignore those lol)

[grumpigremlin]

College Blues - Chapter 2

Here it is. Grammar checked 4 times but probably still hiding some errors <3 This chapter turned out longer than the first, so I’m glad.

Themes: Tired Student Vibes - Uni is hard ok? - Angst - Family

Synopsis: With only 3 months left of their first year attending University, Danny and Sam decided to take a trip back down to Amity Park to visit family for a week to take the edge off. It soon becomes clear that visiting home was something Danny desperately needed.

Word Count: 1482 

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06:00 << Guess who brought a load of snacks for the trip 🍫🍿 >>

06:15 << Remember the train leaves at eight >>

06:30 << U alive? And if u reply with no I swear… 😂 >>

07:30 << Danny? >>

Sam sat there, thinking of what to type next. She didn’t like to pester but considering Danny hadn’t even looked at his phone for this long, giving him another poke seemed more than reasonable. Sam knew how assertive she could be towards both Danny and Tucker at times. It was normal for both of them to leave things until the last minute. But after checking in with Tucker to see if he’d received any replies, Sam was half-tempted to head round to Danny’s dorm and spam the buzzer until he responded. No, that’s too far. They weren’t kids anymore. She should’ve tried to call him instead. Why didn’t she think to do that earlier? Ping. A new message.

07:35 << Sorry, yeah dw im on my way >>

Typical, she thought. It was a little rude that Danny didn’t even think to give a reply sooner than 25 minutes before their train was due to arrive. At the thought of this, Sam began jabbing at her phone, crafting he perfect response to convey her annoyance. What happened next caught her completely off guard. It was silent, but the action of Danny swiftly phasing through the wall behind her was enough to cause Sam to jump up from the bench.

“Shit Danny, do you even use doors anymore?”

“Sorry I was… I was in a bit of a rush. Didn’t have time to, you know, take the long way here.”

Furrowing her brows, Sam opened her mouth, ready to lecture Danny that if he had only gotten up earlier then he wouldn’t need to rush. But she paused, taking in her friend’s face. Danny looked… awful. His normally brightly lit blue eyes were dull with fatigue. It was almost as if he had just rolled out of bed. Considering the chances of a late-night ghost encounter, she chose to let it slide.

“You look...” She begun.

“-Like crap? Yeah I know.” He’d moved to slide off his backpack and sit down on the bench. “Was it a ghost? You could’ve woken me up you know. I don’t mind.” He shook his head, slumping forwards to rest his elbows on his knees. “No, just got distracted with other things.” Probably playing the new video game that he and Tucker had been raving about for the past week, Sam had figured. Now that Danny had eventually turned up, they had around 20 minutes to spare. After grabbing some coffees from the platform over, they returned to the bench and continued conversation. As they spoke, Sam continued to take in the state of her friend. His hair was slightly unkempt, and she was surprised to see that he had only brought a small singular backpack along. Though this made sense due to how much time he had given himself to pack. “I really am sorry by the way, I completely lost track of the clock.” He repeated for what must have been the third time. Finishing what was left of her drink, Sam gave a small laugh and looked back up. “Nah it’s fine. You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t lose track this often, right? I’m just glad you’re alive.”

“Debatable.” He smirked. She practically walked into that one. Ghost jokes were their only source of humour at this point, and the boys would take any chance they got to use them. After a few more minutes of back and forth banter the train finally arrived and the journey commenced. Amity park was a good two hours and thirty minutes away. This made food a must, and as promised, Sam had brought a selection of treats for them both to snack on. “Oh, I actually already ate.” Danny shrugged sheepishly looking down at the pile of treats that had been laid out between them. “But you said you didn’t have time to get anything this morning?” Did he say that? He played back their previous conversation from the platform. He must have done because Sam was right. He took a second to think of an appropriate response “Oh, I meant that I had something on the way over. Good thing I had time, right?”

Things were not adding up at this point. Sam wasn’t stupid and she could tell when she was being lied to. But what he was lying about was still unclear. Was it that he disliked what she had brought? No, that couldn’t be it. Sam had made sure to include things that he liked as well as the usual vegan variations for herself. Maybe he felt unwell? She looked over at Danny, who was gently resting against the train’s window, staring unfocused at the passing scenery. He didn’t look much better than he had around 10 minutes ago. Danny never really liked to let his guard down, especially since being outed as Phantom. While this made sense, it irked Sam when Danny refused to come forward about anything. “Hey, you alright? We could crack open the window if you want.” She motioned, giving him a light nudge. Jolted back into reality, Danny wearily lifted his head. “Huh? Yeah that’d be nice. Could do with some fresh air in here.” That was good, she hadn’t expected him to comply so easily. Getting up, Sam reached overhead and pushed the window latch open. “What do you think is up? Could it be your ice core?”

Danny shook his head. “I doubt it. I haven’t had issues with my ice core in years now. It’s probably just a lack of sleep. It’ll be fine.” There it was. It was this kind of dismissiveness that became so irritating to put up with. It made Sam want to retort back in defiance, but that wouldn’t be fair. It was best to assert herself without causing any more stress than there likely already was. But what else would work other than to push a little further? “Come on, at least drink some water.” She’d insist, offering him one of the many water-bottles she brought. After slight hesitation, Danny accepted the bottle and moved away from the window. He didn’t drink much from it, but it was something.

While most of the snacks remained untouched, the rest of the journey was well spent as the two continued to reminisce over the new ghosts they encountered over the course of the year, and how less manageable they were compared to the ghosts of Amity, which was saying a lot. They discussed what they would do once they got back. While meeting with Tucker at the Nasty Burger was on the agenda for tomorrow, today would be spent settling into their homes and catching up with family. When Danny had notified Jazz that he would be visiting for the week, she was more than happy to travel back down herself. While small, the Fenton family were close. To their parents, it wouldn’t feel the same if only one of them visited at a time. With this in mind, Jazz had insisted that her little brother mention if he were to come down so they could plan accordingly. Familiar buildings could now be seen through the window, indicating that they had reached Amity Park. The two gathered their bags and prepared to leave the train.

“Let me know when you touch base.” Sam said, giving him a quick hug as her parents pulled over to the side of the road. Danny gave an affirmative nod, returning the hug and stepping back. The two waved to each other as the vehicle turned a corner and out of sight. Now it was just him. Five minutes or so had gone by when the phone in his pocket began to buzz. Once again being brought back into the land of the living, Danny hastily grabbed the phone and slid it right to answer. “Hello?”

“Danny-o! Just calling to let you know we’re almost there! Did you arrive safely?” The screeching of car tyres through the other end of the phone were grating to listen to. “Uh, y-yeah, Dad. I’m waiting outside…” The blaring of a passing car horn caused Danny to move the phone away from his ear. “Remember to watch the road, Jack.” Maddie chimed in from the passenger seat. They were definitely close, as the same sound of the car horn was heard from a few blocks down. As if on cue, the all too familiar Fenton Family Ghost Assault Vehicle slide into view. It was a miracle that the tires were able to withstand the backlash as the vehicle came to a sudden halt. Rolling down the window, Jack beamed at his son.

“There he is. Our favourite ghost boy!”

[caligulalotus]

@axiolotl​ ok so im putting this in it’s own post because i dont want to clog people’s dashes but hehehehe

This is under read more cause it got longer than I thought it was gonna be

So The Lucky One serves two purposes as the opening of one of my playlists. Usually I’ll make the first song one that either encompasses the character’s whole journey/nearly all of it, or I’ll put something that lays out the very start of their character arc, and The Lucky One does both of those, as it’s a song about becoming disillusioned with the industry one is a part of. So the opening verses serve young and happy go lucky York Silk, and the song shows the rest of his journey. The last verse I think covers his final season in Seattle SUPER well, actually, and I’m trying to make an animatic out of that.

There actually is only one other song in the pre-shell era not because I don’t have many thoughts about York’s character in that part of his life, but because I don’t know many songs that fit it. Are You Satisfied? fits the disillusionment York would come to experience (” Was I meant to feel happy that my life/Was just about to change?”), and also, the thing that I touched on in my latest fic (cough cough) about feeling like his lack of physical change doesn’t reflect what he’s been through (”'Cause it's my problem if I want to pack up, and run away/It's my business if I feel the need to smoke, and drink and sway/It's my problem, it's my problem/If I feel the need to hide/And it's my problem if I have no friends, and feel I want to die”)

I tried to use Garages songs about York to showcase the beginnings of new eras because there was a suprising amount of songs about York, actually. Our Dork is specifically about him being in the shell, so it is the start of the shell part, basically. “Look Who’s Inside Again” is the next one and is very literal here. I used it both because he’s literally stuck in the shell, and because of “When you're a kid and you're stuck in your room/You'll do any old shit to get out of it/Try making faces/Try telling jokes, making little sounds” because I do think being a child star has fucked York up quite a bit :). I think he feels like he always has to put on a performance of like... being fine, even when he’s not. I’m Gonna Win and 2econd-2ight-2eer are technically shell, but they’re specifically a song for each Pods fight. I thought York needed some vaguely evil songs. He deserves it. I chose I’m Gonna Win for the season 9 fight because it’s got a lot of confidence in the lyrics but it’s also a lot about how much everything sucks all the time. (”It’s hard to fulfill everyone’s expectations/It’s hard to keep up with the rest.../ I’ll never lose, I’ll never die/You’ve seen me before, you’ll see me again/I’ll never give up, I’ll never give in”). 2econd-2ight-2eer is more “going bonkers and having fun with it”, so I think it reflects The Shelled One’s carelessness during the second fight, which I think transfered over to how the Pods played, overconfident and risky. Also the line “The devil made me do it but I also kinda wanted to” just has REALLY fun implications.

The next three songs are post-the final pods fight but before York dies. I put Seventeen on this playlist because I put it on literally every playlist I make for a character between the ages of 15-18. I just think it is neat. I Bet On Losing Dogs doesn’t have a lot of analysis to it , because it is just there because it makes me sad. The Moon Will Sing does have some stuff to it though, namely the lyrics “Tell me once again/I could have been anyone, anyone else/Before you made the choice for me” and “I want to feel the fire that you kept from me/The moon will sing a song for m/I loved you like the sun/Bore the shadows that you made/With no light of my own/I shine only with the light you gave me” because I think it works both as being aimed from York’s perspective at the Shelled One and at the fans, because he really had no agency his entire life. The LoreTM for the first time he avoided shelling is self sacrifice, but the real reason is that he got thrown around the board with JT and PDP, and then no one tried to save him the season he was really shelled. He has had a lot of his agency taken from him by the gods within both the lore and the actual game, and outside of the lore it’s been all the fans. York Silk has never been able to live or die on his own terms.

York Silk (Rest In Violence) starts dead York era. Ghosting is pretty self explanatory and covers the couple of months he was in the Hall. Because Dreaming Costs Money, My Dear and Killer both cover the two year siesta in between York’s resurrection and his first season in debt, because, yeah, that was a thing that happened. Because Dreaming Costs Money, My Dear literally opens with the lyrics “I can still smell the fire/Even though it's long died out/The smoke still hangs in my hair/And on some quiet evenings it burns my eyes” which just. Dying fucks you up! Who knew! Especially when your death entailed being set on fire! Killer specifically reflects that no one knew what, exactly, York’s death was gonna be like because he was the first debted batter. (”Can the killer in me/Tame the fire in you?/Oh, is there nothing left to do for us?/I am sick of the chase/But I'm hungry for blood/And there's nothing I can do”) Was he going to make people Unstable? Would it be something else? How exactly was he gonna go about doing it? And he just had two years to ruminate on that. Fucked up and evil, The Game Band!

Alright the shelling of oliver loofah by the coward york silk is our second to last era, which I am lovingly calling “York is back from the dead and ego makes him rude”. I specifically write ego as making him draw away from his friends and loved ones, which is why Achilles Come Down (”Some of us love you/Achilles, it's not much but there's proof”) and Never Love An Anchor (”On some level I think I always understood/That a ship could never really love an anchor/So I did the only thing that I could/And severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbor”) are on there.

AND the final era, Vault time. Goodbye reprises Look Who’s Inside Again so I have it as the start of the Vault, because man, York sure was trapped by and forced to play for two gods on two separate occasions, huh. Dead Hearts focuses more on York having to simply sit by and watch as the Fridays died and the world ended, locked inside the Vault. Nobody York knew really... made it into the Vault with him. The way Dead Hearts goes carries on like a conversation, so I’ve been imagining it as Lootcrates talking to York and trying to get his perspective of the history happening before their eyes. Last Words of a Shooting Star is on there because everyone is dying and it makes me sad so of course it is, but also because post Semi-Centenial all the replicas and their originals just had to live together in there, and the line “Did you know the Liberty Bell is a replica, silently housed in it’s original walls?/And while it’s dreams played music in the night/Quietly, it was told to believe” just makes me feel immense sadness about the replicas and the replica making process. The last song on the playlist and the era of the Vault is As The World Caves In because come on. It’s the end of the world and I don’t have a big variety in my music taste. I hope York is doing okay in that Vault, man.

[crewhonk]

Only Happy Accidents (11)

YN is determined, on God, to let Steve have his day and not make it about herself for once.

Warnings: YN is dumb and in early labour, little smutty moment, Nat Knows Everything. y'all have had a fluffy lil series, but I'm about to angst it up and im not sorry

Only Happy Accidents (master list)

Songs: High As Hope Album— Florence and the Machine 

_______________________

July 3rd, Steve’s Birthday Party, Three Weeks and Three Days until due date, 9:15 AM

“You know. This view is something else.” YN piped up from the balcony of Steve’s old room at the tower. The room was massive and clean. The balcony was YN’s favourite besides the king bed, as it overlooked the treelike and training grounds that YN could watch the new recruits do morning laps or stretch out in the sun. “It’s nice to get out of the city for once.”

He hummed and came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her torso and swaying with her, hands on her swollen belly. She was wearing the prettiest little number he’d seen her wear since her wedding dress, and god, he’d married the most beautiful woman in the world. All of the worlds, probably. It was a simple white sundress that plunged between her boobs and stopped at the top of her stomach. A thin white piece of fabric cinched at the waist allowed for the dress to flare over her stomach and ass, and Steve really, really didn’t want to leave this room.

It was odd being back here— a stranger to his past life. The too clean surfaces of the room and bare walls which had never been cluttered with pictures haunted him and reminded of a person who he didn’t like. He liked the person he was now, though. Kind, sentimental, husband, almost-baby-daddy. 

It was odd being here, but Dr. Cho and Natasha insisted— they both wanted YN to be close to the delivery room and medical office in case something happened, and Steve, for once, encouraged Natasha’s overprotectiveness. 

“Have I told you I love you today, Wife?” He mumbled, lips teasing the bare skin of her neck. Her hair was tied into a bandana and off of her neck, and he loved the access it gave him. Maybe his favourite part of her was, in fact, the back of her neck. 

“A few times, but I could be reminded, Husband.” YN snorted, liking the way the word tasted on her tongue and how Steve held her closer when she said it. He felt her stomach move under his hands and a thrill like no other filled him from his toes to his nose. 

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing her shoulder. “I love you,” kissing her neck. “I love you,” kissing her jaw and cheek and finally, turning her head to face him, kissed her lips ad smiled. “I love you.” 

YN smiled and kissed him back, stepping away quickly and backing away from him and into the bathroom. “I know.”

___________________________

12:07 PM

Natasha prided herself on being observant. She knew Bucky was hiding something from her— not normal for him, but she trusted him enough to know that he would tell her when he was ready. She knew that Sam had been the one eating her snacks she specifically labelled. She knew Cho was seeing someone inside the compound. She knew things, and it was her favourite quality. 

So when YN walked in with Steve’s hand wrapped in her own, Natasha knew today was the day. 

It had taken a few strategic words on her part to get Steve to leave his wife’s side, but when he finally succumbed and moped off to find Sam and Bucky, Natasha followed YN to the snack table set up for the guests about to arrive for Steve’s birthday party and waited. 

“YN.” She said, and YN shook her head, shoving three finger sandwiches in her mouth and gathering a handful of cherry tomatoes. 

“YN.” She tried again and YN swallowed her food, eating a lemon square, and upon debating it, ate another. She looked at Natasha who was staring her down and YN raised on finger. ‘wait’. 

So, Natasha waited, eyeing YN’s stomach nervously. It was lower today than any other day she’d seen it— YN had always carried the baby high, but today it looked to be a completely different bump. Steve was sure to be aware, but since the due date wasn’t for another three weeks probably convinced himself that it was the dress YN was wearing that made her appear different. Steve was never someone who made assumptions about things this big. 

YN finished the cherry tomatoes in her hand and gulped down some punch, ate the slice of fruit she’d picked up and turned to Natasha. 

“I’m not allowed to eat in the delivery room, and I’ve been having light contractions since 8 AM this morning.” YN said simply and Natasha’s jaw dropped. Her hands immediately fell to YN’s stomach and somehow the skin and muscle even felt different. 

“You’ve been having contractions?” And upon YN shushing her loudly, dropped her voice. “And Steve doesn’t know?”

“I told him that she’s sitting on my bladder and I’ve been going to the bathroom and leaving the room often so I can carry out the worst ones.” YN said, looking at her husband who was laughing loudly with his friends. God, his world was about to be shifted upside down. 

“How far apart are they?” Natasha asked, and YN looked at her phone, nodding. One minute to go.

“I’m about to have another one in a minute if they’re regular, but right now they’re all at eighteen minutes give or take.” YN said, grabbing Nat’s hand and pulling her from the room. She walked quickly down a few turns and leaned against the wall, rocking from side to side and looking as if she was concentrating very hard on a spot on the other wall. 

“What can I do?” Nat said hurriedly. 

“Keep watch. I’m not letting this ruin Steve’s birthday party.” YN snarled through her teeth. They weren’t bad— just really bad period cramps, but they still sucked.

“YN. You are in early labour, we need to tell him.” Natasha hissed and YN straightened up, leaning the back of her head against the wall and catching her breath. 

“No. These past few months have been about me, and I just want Steve to be the centre of attention for once. He deserves it. Plus, I only started having contractions at eight this morning, audit’s noon now— I still have a minimum of four hours before real labour starts.” YN tried to reason and Natasha shook her head. 

“Can we at least go see doctor Cho?” Nat pleaded and YN, after searching her expression for any way out, nodded. 

“Fine.”

____________________________

1:00 PM

“So, you are in early labour, but you’re only about two centimetres dilated, but I’m not going to keep you here since you’re not in active labour.” Cho beamed, having grown attached to both Steve and YN throughout this process. She’d been a huge part of this journey, and felt as if she and YN had become some odd form of friends. 

“Told you.” YN joked at Nat as she helped the pregnant lady out of the stirrups and onto her feet. YN slipped on her slipper-flats and bowed her head as a smaller contraction made her belly tense. 

“Hey, I’m this kids aunt, so I’m going to make sure they’re safe.” Natasha rolled her eyes and smiled, nodding towards Cho who looked thoughtful. 

“What do you think the baby is going to be?” Cho wondered. “I have my guesses but It’s not my place to say.”

Natasha looked at YN, then, and down to her belly. A small, pale hand rested on the swell and Natahsa cocked her head. 

“Healthy, I hope.”

____________________________

3:16 PM

The party was swinging, by now. The music filled the common room as Avengers from around the world and galaxy filled the room to celebrate Steve Rogers. YN smiled politely as Carol Danvers looked fondly down at you, shaking your hand. 

“He’s a lucky guy, that Steve Rogers.” Her voice was low and silky and if it was Halloween again, maybe, just maybe, YN would have flirted back. 

“I think I’m the lucky one, honestly.” YN blushed and Carol smiled brightly. The conversation was that of small talk and not much else, but YN did feel as if she was the only person that mattered when Carol spoke— a quality of Carols that YN quite admired. Eventually, Carol was beckoned by Nick Fury, who had chosen a casual pair of sunglasses over his usual eye patch. 

YN could feel pairs of eyes on her the whole time she wandered around the room, and found that Wanda Maximoff, Pepper Potts, as well as Natasha and Carol all seemed to be in the know about what was happening. Wanda, likely because she was in YN’s mind, Pepper, because she’d gone through the same thing (and been just as stubborn), and Carol, because maybe, just maybe, YN was being less subtle than she thought. 

The contractions had since lost their regularity— coming at intervals from anywhere between five minutes and half an hour. It was disheartening, frankly, but seeing the was Steve seemed to be glowing was bearable. YN was leaning against the counter, just watching him from across the room and nursing another finger sandwich and water when he looked over. Peter Quill and Thor were both chatting with Steve, but when Steve caught her eyes, he excused himself politely and wandered over to her. He walked up slowly, and leaned against her lightly, kissing her soundly and making her toes curl. 

“You’re pretty.” He murmured, dopey smile on his face. YN snorted, and cupped his cheeks gently, kissing him again and brushing the tip of her nose against his. 

“You excited?” YN asked nervously, and Steve grinned widely cupping the sides of her belly. 

“I just want to meet him now—“

“Her.”

“It’s going to be a boy I know it.”

“I’m sure she wants to meet you just as bad.” YN smiled, and as she felt another cramp tighten in her stomach, kissed the breath out of Steve Rogers to distract herself. 

____________________________

7:07PM

The dinner plates had been cleared, and the party had settled into the couches— only a few remained. Those with children or living off-planet needed to go, so now, only a small group remained. YN ignored the stares of Wanda, Pepper and Natasha as she curled up into Steve’s side, rubbing her belly every time a contraction made itself known. She glanced at her phone again and noted the time— they were getting more regular now— an easy 16 minutes and they were also at a consistent pain level which was manageable but still uncomfortable. 

“You okay?” Steve whispered into YN’s temple and she nodded, settling against him as the contraction subsided. He kissed the crown of her head and rubbed her shoulder which was hidden under her brown leather jacket. 

“I’m wonderful.” YN returned and she wrapped her arm around his middle, throwing her legs over his thigh and sighing. 

“You waiting for something?” Steve asked, looking down at her phone, and she played it off, shrugging. 

“You caught me, I have a mistress. She’s getting a private jet and we’re running away together.” YN grinned and Steve made a sound in the back of his throat— somewhere between a guffaw and a snort. “She’s really into pregnant women too.”

“Too bad I’m not, huh?” Steve crooned and she ignored the way her stomach turned at his tone. 

“Too bad, indeed.” YN agreed and suddenly, Steve stood, holding a hand out for YN to take and tired back to the group when she stood, blushing furiously. “We’re going to head to bed, it’s been swell.” Steve smiled and the small group of people booed. 

“Come on, man the night is still young.” Sam protested, offering Steve another beer as an offering. Steve waved him off and wrapped an arm around his wife shoulder, carting them off towards the door. 

“That’s why we’re going!” 

______________________

7:15PM

Steve wasted little time in pressing YN against the door of his bedroom, hands skirting under her dress and tracing up the sides of her thighs. His touch was hot on her, goosebumps erupting over her skin in distinct trails. His lips were seared to her in an intense kiss, and he bent down and scooped her into his arms bridal style, making her squeal and clutch him desperately. 

“Steve! What’re you—!” YN tried, laughing as he tried to sexily take off his shirt but failing and looking like a damn dork. 

“I’m about to ravish my wife, and make sure she doesn’t run away with her pregnant-woman-loving mistress.” He joked, crawling over YN and kissing her neck, making her sigh and scratch his scalp. She spread her legs easily for him, and he fit between them like a puzzle piece. 

“Love this dress, couldn’t keep my eyes off of you the whole night.” He mumbled, moving her thin strap down her arm and following its path with kisses. “It’s look better on the floor though.”

And so he urged her to sit up, kissing her forehead gently before lifting the dress over her head and making his breath stop in his throat— god, she was beautiful. She was braless— the dress made no room for one, and her tits were swollen and soft and waiting for him to get his mouth on them and give them the attention they deserved. His lips were gentle on her— her skin had been wonderfully sensitive these past few days, and it never took much time for her to become putty in his hands. 

“Steve.” YN said, and he grunted against her, the taste of her warm in his mouth. She wanted to continue this, really she did, but someone else int eh room had another idea. 

“Say my name again, Sweetheart. Love hearin’ you say it.” He replied, pressing her onto her back and letting his hands drift lightly across her belly and to the apex of her thighs where he cupped her sex, and moaned. “Wet for me, huh?”

“Steve, wait.” YN said and Steve was in his right mind enough to pull back a little, looking into her eyes. 

“You okay, babe? Did I do something?” He asked, worry making his tone thick. YN shook her head and smiled, brow furrowing a little and looking at the side table where she saw her phone. 

“Check my phone please, and tell me the time.” She said, and his heart dropped to his stomach— was there really someone else?

“7:37.” He replied and she nodded, grabbing a pillow and rolling onto her hands and knees. She buried her face in the pillow and let out a low moan, somewhere from deep in her body that Steve didn’t realize she could even make. She rocked back and forth into the pillow, and Steve watched helplessly as he watched his wife’s body tighten and tighten until he thought it would break. 

“YN? What— What’s going on?” He begged and her hand shot out, gripping his forearm hard enough for him to be concerned— it didn’t hurt, but usually she was always so gentle with him, even when she was frustrated. “You’re scaring me.”

Eventually, she let her breath go and she melted into the bed, pulling her red face from the pillow and resting on her cheek, looking up at him. 

“I didn’t tell you ‘cause I wanted you to have one day where you were the centre of attention, but I’ve been in early labour since 8 in the morning and that was a damn strong contraction.”

And Steve, a man who had seen death over the period of a century, a man who has killed and run from the government on more than one occasion. Steve, a man who has saved the world countless times over and a man who was the bravest she’d ever met let his eyes roll into his skull and fall off the bed in the most dramatic faint YN Rogers had ever seen.

______________________

Tag List (send me an ask, ONLY. must interact with the fic more than a like): yesfanficsaremylife / notyourtypicalrose /  laurxn-robinson / disaster-rose / lille-kattunge / wwecrazed2010 / vxidnik / chewingoffmyfoot/ vitamingrant / captainamericasbeard / chrisgalore / songforhema / mmyepic / multifandommandy / tommyhoe / lostdarksoul6 / crist1216 / taeeemin / jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory / feelmyroarrrr / teller258316 / mrsdeanwinchester19 / qrangr / mariswritingforfun / nerdypinupcrystal / kittycatlover18 / laucontrerasv / printedpeterparker / @dumblani  / @captainomad / eversonaive / rainbowkisses31 / i-think-i-am-adorable / rainbowkisses31 / smalltintedgorl/ geeksareunique / jennmurawski13 / clutteredmind-emptythoughts / venezuelaanklemayonnaise

[oh-no-whoopsie]

reasons I love kip!! (aka @ghostsingold) 

(making this post bc they deserve all the love and my meds have kicked in so im able to be productive today. thanks long-acting adderall!!) 

kip I love you for so many reasons and as I fill out college applications im gonna list them out <3 no special occasion its just! you make me happy and I wanted to share that with you and since I have a teeny blog no one will see this but you <3 

1.) this response to a post I made on my old blog. it was one of my first positive interactions on Tumblr and this tiny piece of writing made that entire week easier. it was a tiny start to a friendship and it was also a stranger caring for me, which at that time I didn’t think was possible. 

2.) every single time that they have been a part of the Brown Eye Stan Club and hyped up brown eyes,,,,dude I can’t you’ve been such a big part of the journey to accept my brown eyes. it means so much to me that you just? say it!! you’re proud of the fact you love brown eyes! hell yeah dude! thank you!

3a.) for sending me songs that remind you of me??? to have someone think of me?? MY HEART?? I- I can’t express how much it means to me I just,, hnnhhh you even made me a fucking playlist (which I listen to CONSTANTLY) (here is the playlist ) just. dude. I love you 

4.) one of those songs is Glitter & Gloss by Skott and 

          a) this song makes me feel like a fucking badass 

          b) made me feel so appreciated and loved because it was the first time someone had said “this song reminds me of you!” 

          c). when I was stalking your blog trying to find my old posts I found this post about that song and?? sunbeams through Spanish moss? trees? pretty?? is this how you see me?? im in love????? also this ask I sent you where you describe your love for the sun <3 the implication that I am even a little bit like the sun to you makes me wanna cry happiness 

5.) Your taste in music is SUPERB. IMPECCABLE. A DELIGHT. 

6.) Someday I will have the strength to do naniwrimo with you and that will be a glorious month (and next September we should be able to be writing buddies!!!!! because now I have meds for attention span so I can write again >:) ) 

7.) A long time ago (old blog) I asked for people to give me nicknames because I never got cute nicknames and because I could only ever insult myself. for the longest time I forgot what you said but I remembered!!!! it was birdie!!

          a). even though now most people call me doe cuz of bumblebee, you were the first person to reply to that post and just because milk suggested fawn/doe and it stuck doesn’t mean I love birdie any less 

          b.) it means a lot that you suggested it in the first place and while I was finding links for this post I came across this ask where you call me birdie :> p.s. you still mean a lot to me and I hope you’re okay <3 

8.) every single time you sent me a picture of a frog :),, also that one post about taking fake shots of water still sends me but I can’t find it to link it,, and also everything you listed on this post including the fact that it is inspired by my post

9.) when you agreed to talk to people for me when I was panicking thinking they were going to die but had to go to sleep. that means so much that you would take that role on and dude I am so so sorry I ever asked that of you. 

10). you made me find magic in the sunlight and not just the moonlight, you helped me find that balance and accept that piece of me and it sounds stupid but its really important ok also im just gonna say it: your voice is perfection it is comfort it is warm and all things good in this world. ive only heard you speak like twice but I could listen to you for the rest of my life

11.) sometimes you send me posts that r like “thinking of you!!” and THEY MAKE MY DAY omfg 

12.) when you drew me!!! 

          a.) bc holy shit you are an amazing artist if you let me I want to post that drawing of me on my blog

          b.) I was supposed to draw you in return I am sorry I did not,, I still plan on doing it tho 

          c.) we drew ourselves as fairies and that was pretty fun 

          d.) you made me see beauty in myself I- 

13.) for never once encouraging my ed or bad habits. you were ready to call me tf out and I appreciate that so much dude? you were never subtley pro you also seem ready to stab anyone who opposes you. hell you post callouts against pr0-ana shit and m**nspo and f*tspo and photoshop and all of it. I admire you so much 

14.) for letting me ramble on about hermes and offerings and spirituality! 

15.) for lighting a candle for Catherine and talking with me that night

(I have the entire conversation copied into a google doc on my phone because it needed to be saved. the things you said are beautiful. it is so touching and breathtaking and if I could hug you I would and  I promise not to forget if you won’t forget. )

16.) holy shit dude P O E T R Y, both for being so good at it and for reading mine. 

17.) helping validate my arospec questioning and enby questioning,,, it was actually through your blog that I realized oh shit! I might be aro!! and having someone to talk about gender issues and arospec stuff is SO AMAZING and I love you <3 and thank you for talking with me and for helping me and for validating me 

18) validating my anger!! or at least helping to do so! you point out when things are unfair! you genuinely want my life to improve! you helped me realize some of my friends are shitty! you helped me accept things! 

19.) I love your vibes. I can’t say this enough but somehow you are just so wonderful to me,,, you are amazing I can’t describe it. you are ethereal and terrific and your features could be anywhere from beautiful to cryptic to solid to handsome but I promise you that there is something unique about you. a bit of mystery and magic left over from the days when fairytales were real. you have all the power of the sun and light and fire in both the life giving and the destructive aspects. you are so perfect and wonderful thank you 

20.) because you told me “you do not deserve to be traumatized” and in all honesty that slapped me into reality. if i still had my old Tumblr I probably would’ve screenshotted it so I could get the exact quote but I do not know how to make you understand How Much That Helped me 

all in all,,,, I must end the list here because I need to go be productive. alas.there is more I didn’t even BEGIN to mention,,, but kip, you are my rae of sunshine. someday we are going to go be cryptic authors in Scotland who disappear into the woods, perhaps to hunt with the faeries, perhaps no, who knows. we will become part of the local lore,, independent and happy and spooky. 

I love you so much!  also sorry I went through your archive to find all this,,,, to be fair I already did it once to find my posts <3 

I would never say that just one person “saved me”. thats too big of a responsibility to share. but kip, you helped save me, in ways I can’t explain, from myself and from death and from an abyss of numbness. you saved me from a thousand tiny deaths and gave me a thousand new pieces of life and I would not be the person I am today without you. I love and appreciate you so much and you bring me sunlight and joy and peace and connection. you are a true friend to me. thank you for being here. you deserve the world and so much more. 

[princesselise]

Is being a jewish conversion student hard at your age? What do your parent think about it? (dont feel pressured to answer, im just 15 and planning to become a conversion student too)

i don't mean to deter you but im going to be honest: it is hard. it is extremely hard. 

converting is already a long and difficult process that can take many years, but doing it as a minor is just… a whole nother thing.

legally, there is a limit to how much a rabbi can really do for you without your parents consent. (religious education laws and all that.) additionally, when you're young your interests and desires WILL change a lot. i'd really recommend giving yourself time to think about it for at least a few months, maybe even a year. ik it feels condescending at times, but that is how our brains work when they aren't fully developed.

as for my family… this is just my experience, but my father is a devout catholic and my mom is pretty anti religion. This is something I have to keep hidden from them for my own safety, and that is a huge layer of stress that you really need to ask yourself if you can handle. ofc everyone's family is different (and i have a hunch my mom will be okay with it when i do decide to tell her) but try to assess your situation and get a feel for how safe it is for you and how much stress keeping yourself safe would entail.

so ultimately i'm 16, a full time college student, and i have to keep my faith hidden from my family. its fucking hard, yes.  but for me, it has been SO worth it. the community, the friendships and love i've built with other jews, the inner fulfillment ive gotten from practicing and believing in jewish faith… i wouldnt trade it for the world. its a part of my soul at this point and its absolutely worth the hardships it takes to get here.

even without your family's support, u can start with baby steps. i have a conversion blog over at @dykeconvert with some good reading lists and myjewishlearning.com has great resources for all stages of your journey.

really the best thing i have to say is take care of yourself. keep yourself safe. judaism will always be there when you're ready for it.

[vestsfriends]

2 Years Later (An Andi Mack Fanfic) Part 1/4

Pairings: TJ Kippen/Cyrus Goodman, Jonah Beck/Cyrus Goodman, Jonah Beck/Andi Mack, Andi Mack/Amber, Buffy Driscoll/Marty From The Party, Bex Mack/Bowie Quinn

Word Count: 4,790 (for parts 1 and 2)

[please read this I worked on it for ten hours straight]

With the school year finally coming to a close along with the never ending drama of middle school, the GHC found themselves at the last minute of their graduation ceremony. When Principal Metcalf gave his final goodbye to the students, he signaled the graduating eighth graders to stand up and walk back down aisle of the auditorium. The students were each wearing proper clothing to comply to the dress requirements. The boys were wearing blue, white, and grey polo shirts with a tie around the collar, and all the girls wearing different colored dresses and skirts. Unfortunately, there was assigned positions, so Andi, Cyrus, and Buffy were not anywhere near each other.

When they reached the end of their dismissal, Andi, with her light purple skirt being blown away by the wind, searched through the crowd of graduates and their families to try and find hers. She stood on her tip-toes to see if she could spot Bowie’s curly brown hair peeking up amongst the mob. Alas, she was unsuccessful in finding her parents. Andi’s dark copper eyes fell gloomily on the ground below her. But suddenly, a hand grasped her shoulder from behind, startling the young girl.

“Hey, kid!” Bowie exclaimed, he and Bex enthusiastically surrounding their daughter with a bouquet of flowers. “Congratulations! You’re officially a high schooler now!”

“Dadddd,” Andi whined and stuffed her face into her father’s chest while laughing. “I don’t want to be called a high schooler just yet.” She rolled her eyes up at Bowie who chuckled and glanced over at Bex.

“Wait, where are Cyrus and Buffy?” The professional make-up artist asked. “I thought they would have met up with you by now.”

Andi unwrapped her arms from her father. “Oh right! I gotta go find them! See you guys later!”

Bex and Bowie wrapped an arm around each other’s waist tightly, their bodies immediately warming from the touch.

“Don’t forget to meet us at the Spoon when you find them!” Bex called out to Andi who was running in and out of the swarm of other students. She turned back for a brief moment to meet Bex’s eyes before shifting her head forwards again.

Bex leaned into Bowie’s ear and whispered, “she’s growing up way too fast.” Bowie nodded solemnly and gave Bex’s hand a squeeze in comfort.

Meanwhile, Andi was almost sure that her childhood friends had left until she spotted them on a bench in front of their middle school. The short-haired girl sped over to them, flailing her arms to get their attention.

“Hey!” She yelled. “We did it guys!”

Cyrus and Buffy jumped off the bench and ran to hug their friend. The three teens wrapped their arms around each other in a group hug. They were very emotional, and their eyes had already started to form tears.

After a few moments of silence, the three now-high schoolers separated.

“The Good Hair Crew has finally ended one of their longest chapters, and will now be starting a much bigger, and longer, journey!” Cyrus spoke proudly as if he a news broadcaster. Since it was a special day, Andi and Buffy decided to let him call them the “good hair crew”.

The three of them laughed until another unknown voice spoke from behind them.

“Congrats, guys! You’re all going to join me in the high school next year.” The unknown voice belonged to none-other than Jonah Beck, the newest and honorary member of the GHC. They each greeted Jonah with a friendly wave.

“Oh, that’s right, we’re finally going to be in the same school again Jonah,” Cyrus happily gave his green-eyed friend a bro hug. “It feels like it’s been forever since we’ve seen you in the hallways.”

Andi nodded in agreement, smiling for a little bit too long at Jonah. Next to her, Buffy was looking down at her wrist to check what time it was.

“Guys, we’ve got to get going. We had the biggest table at The Spoon reserved for us and we can’t be late.” Buffy informed the group. They stopped their chatter and obeyed her, the four teens walking down the sidewalk into town to eat at their favorite restaurant of all time.

•

•

•

After a short period of time, they arrived at the front of The Spoon. Andi pushed open the door, and the small bell hanging above the door rang softly. The four teens filed into the diner, their eyes scanning the diner to find their table.

To their surprise, Amber was currently working her afternoon shift and excitedly made her way over to them, smiling in relief as if she had been saved from a horrible punishment.

“Oh thank god you guys are here,” The blonde-haired waitress exaggerated her voice for dramatic effect. “It’s really been one of those days.”

“Yeah I know what that feels like,” Andi sighed, recalling all of the times when she had to deal with nonstop family drama between Bex and CeCe. “Anyway, we reserved a table for around eight people.”

Amber raised her eyebrows curiously. “What’s the occasion?”

Andi shared a knowing glance with Buffy and Cyrus. “We just graduated from Middle School,” the girl with the short brown pixie-cut haircut announced. Andi gestured to her best friends.

“Wow congrats,” Amber complimented. “And your table’s right over here.”

During the entire conversation between Andi and Amber, Cyrus’ focus was elsewhere. He had been staring down at his phone for a while, anxiously waiting for a response from TJ. He had asked for the billionth time if TJ was coming to their graduation celebration. A month back, TJ had initially agreed to attending the get-together when Cyrus asked him. Yet, he was nowhere to be seen.

Not only were the past few weeks leading up to the eighth grade graduation stressful all on its own, he had another contributor to his anxiety. Cyrus’ friendship with TJ had been on thin ice quite recently, with the costume day incident a few weeks back, along with the swingset incident when Cyrus saw TJ and Kira on the swings together, but what truly threw Cyrus over the edge was that just last week, he had seen Kira and TJ holding hands. The dark-haired boy felt his entire heart crumble within just those few seconds. It was as if everything he cared about had been thrown onto the ground and immediately shattered into a million pieces.

What Cyrus didn’t understand was why, why did he feel like it was a crime for TJ to be with Kira? It’s not like TJ was doing anything wrong or illegal.

Yet, Cyrus remained feeling as though he was being ignored by TJ nowadays. Sometimes Cyrus wished he had seen the full truth, that maybe there was a logical explanation, but Cyrus’ mind never allowed him to think rationally, and the moment he had seen Kira’s and TJ’s fingers intertwined, Cyrus ran as far away from them as humanly possible and found a place to hide behind a building.

That day was one of the worst days of Cyrus’ life, after he saw them together, he cried for what had seemed like forever. Any feeling of worth or happiness was gone, his body seemed hollow, completely empty. Cyrus remembered returning home late at night to his parent’s dismay, since he hadn’t called or texted them the entire day, but when they saw his tear-stained face, they immediately stopped their scolding and comforted him.

“Hey, Cy-Guy,” Jonah turned Cyrus’ attention away from his deep thought process. “You’ve been intensely staring at your phone for 10 minutes dude, Ambers showing us to our table now. Are you okay?” The green-eyed boy gently placed a hand on the other boy’s shoulder.

Cyrus swatted Jonah’s hand off of him. “I’m fine,” he said in a low, cold voice, avoiding the hurt in Jonahs eyes. Cyrus wiped the wetness from his face as he walked over the large table in the back room. Jonah and Buffy shared a worried look with each other as they followed.

The dark-haired boy sat down in a chair at the far end, with Buffy sitting down next to him on his left. Cyrus took out his phone again to check his messages. Or rather, at the very least, see if TJ had read them. The dirty blonde-haired boy hadn’t responded to any of Cyrus’ texts since around the middle of May.

5/29/19 at 10:30am

ChocolateChipMuffin: TJ?? U there?

ChocolateChipMuffin: Will you please tell me what happened with the whole costume day thing?

ChocolateChipMuffin: I know you were going to say something before Kira showed up

6/7/19 at 2:00pm

ChocolateChipMuffin: Teej? U there?

ChocolateChipMuffin: please TJ

ChocolateChipMuffin: we haven’t properly talked in a while

ChocolateChipMuffin: I miss you....

Read 3:50am

6/15/19 at 5:30pm

ChocolateChipMuffin: TJ?? Um im sorry but since when have u brought Kira to our hangout place??

ChocolateChipMuffin: I thought it was our place

ChocolateChipMuffin: yknow where we share our stuff together?

ChocolateChipMuffin: .....

6/21/19 at 4:00

ChocolateChipMuffin: are you ever going to answer me? Or is this how our friendship ends?

ChocolateChipMuffin: I saw you and Kira holding hands...does that mean u guys are dating?

ChocolateChipMuffin: I mean I’m not jealous or anything I just really miss hanging out with you... it’s been so long

ChocolateChipMuffin: will u at least still come to the graduation get-together on Tuesday? Pretty please?

Today at 12:35pm

ChocolateChipMuffin: TJ, you told me you were going to come

ChocolateChipMuffin: I really thought you were my friend

ChocolateChipMuffin: please respond tj

ChocolateChipMuffin: it’s been almost a month and you’ve been avoiding me at school, and on the phone

ChocolateChipMuffin: how long are you going to keep this up for?!

ChocolateChipMuffin: I’m done.

Cyrus aggressively pushed his phone back into his pocket and set his head down on the table so nobody else could see his despair. Bowie and Bex, who were sitting on the opposite side of the wooden table, raised their eyebrows.

“Hey, what’s wrong with-“ Andi shushed her father. Bowie turned to face her, and Andi shook her head as to say “now is not the time”. Fortunately, Andi’s young parents went back to chatting about famous old films from the 90’s.

Jonah, who was sitting in between Buffy and Andi, turned to the short-haired girl and whispered, “do you know what’s going on with Cyrus?”

Andi shrugged. “I think Buffy knows more but- TJ has been ignoring Cyrus since May I think.”

Jonah’s eyes widened. “You’re kidding!”

Andi quickly held a finger up to Jonah’s mouth. “Shush!” Andi whisper-shouted. “Not so loud!”

Jonah felt a weird feeling rising from his chest due to Andi’s finger lingering on his lips. Oddly enough, he felt a twinge of sadness as she took her finger off of him.

Weird, Jonah thought. He brushed off the strange feeling and turned his attention back to the issue at hand.

“What happened exactly?” Jonah asked. “I doubt TJ would just stop talking to Cyrus for no reason.”

Andi sighed. “Yeah, well, something did happen. He and Kira started hanging out more.”

Jonah rotated his head to the side. “So..?”

Andi raised an eyebrow in confusion. “What do you mean, ‘so..?’ Cyrus 100% likes TJ, and he saw them holding hands. You are so oblivious, Jonah.” She chuckled and rolled her eyes. “You have definitely never changed.”

Jonah took slight offense to Andi’s comment and dramatically gasped. “What do you mean?”

Andi lifted her eyebrows sarcastically. “Seriously? Jonah when we were dating all those months ago, you were quite oblivious to other people’s feelings.”

“I am? I legit had no idea.” Jonah felt awkward for not realizing how other people’s feelings were impacted by him. “I’m sorry if I ever hurt you.”

“Don’t worry, everything’s fine now.” Andi glanced over at Jonah. “Honestly, I miss all those crazy times when we didn’t know how to act towards each other.” She gave him a crooked grin.

Jonah giggled quietly. “You mean that time when I gave you a freaking gnome?”

Andi held the side of her face and laughed. “Oh god I remember that. And the rice with my name misspelled? Who could ever forget that?”

The two exes laughed at their strange behavior of the past. When their giggles settled down, their eyes made contact once again.

“Do you ever wonder what would have happened if we had still been together?” Andi asked.

Jonah shrugged his shoulders. “Who knows honestly. All I’m glad for is that we have grown from all of that.” The green-eyed boy’s deep dimples were displayed through his wide grin.

“Me too.” Andi couldn’t help but wish she and Jonah’s relationship had worked out. She hated that she missed one of her more dysfunctional relationships. Yet, Andi wanted nothing more but to hold the dimpled boy’s hand again. She missed having a crazy crush on the smiley frisbee team captain.

“Uh, Andi?” Jonah broke Andi out of her thoughts. “The baby taters are here.”

“Oh! Right. Cool.” Andi quickly reached out to the large basket of baby taters placed in the middle of the long table and grabbed a few.

Meanwhile to the right of Jonah and Andi, Buffy had been keeping watch over Cyrus, whose head had still not left the table. The dark-haired boy was silently crying for a very long time, and Buffy could not stand it. But the curly-haired girl was absolutely certain that the literal moment she saw TJ’s face, she would tear him apart. Buffy was and has always remained the bodyguard of the group, if anyone hurts her friends, they would have to answer to Buffy’s wrath. And she knew she would have to go through detention afterwards, but to her, it would be worth it.

Once the baby taters had been set on the table, Cyrus finally lifted up his head, but his eyes still remained fully on his phone which was peeking out of his pant pocket. Buffy took notice of the dark bags under his eyes, along with the tear streaks that went down his entire face. She immediately felt the need to hug him.

“Still no word from TJ, huh?” Buffy ensured that her voice was gentle. “I am really sorry, Cyrus.” She rubbed circles on the boy’s back.

Cyrus shook his head and turned to Buffy. “What about you? Have you heard from Marty since the marathon incident?”

Buffy sighed and shook her head. “Sadly, no. But I’m pretty sure it’s because he feels horrible for letting me faint during the end of the marathon.” She tightened her lips. “I think that Marty was blaming himself for what happened but I couldn’t get the chance to tell him that he did nothing wrong. So now I think he’s giving me space because ‘he doesn’t want to hurt me again’.” She exhaled a long breath.

Cyrus laughed. “At least you know he still cares about you.” He gazed back at the floor, firmly gripping his hands together. “I haven’t been in touch with TJ for so long.” He inhaled a shaky breath.

“Buffy, why does this always happen to me? Nobody I love ever loves me back.” Tears were now gliding down the young boy’s face, his nose sniffling to keep from running. He shifted his head to look at Buffy in the eyes, and she had never seen her friend’s face so red in her entire life. Buffy quickly wrapped her arms tightly around her friends trembling body. The rest of the table had already gotten up from their seats and started to crowd around Cyrus and Buffy. Jonah and Andi were beyond upset on their friend’s behalf. Jonah couldn’t stand seeing Cyrus like this, and for whatever reason, he envied Buffy, he wanted to be the one to hug Cyrus and tell him that he was going to be okay.

Cyrus had begun to sob, letting out loud agonizing cries that echoed throughout the entire room. Buffy whispered kind and comforting things into his ear as she continued to rub small circles on the dark haired boy’s spine.

After a few minutes, the cries that escaped from Cyrus’ mouth had eventually started to simmer. So, Buffy carefully pealed her arms off of her friend and met his eyes.

“Cyrus, I want you to know that whatever you are feeling right now, it’s going to end. Don’t worry. You are going to meet a fantastic guy who’s going to never EVER leave you. I promise, Cyrus.” Buffy reassured her friend, not even paying any attention to the many other people who were watching them, she only focused on her friend in need. “And whether or not you meet that guy today or in two years, you’re going to find him, Cyrus. You will.”

The dark brown-haired boy smiled warmly, mouthing a “thank you” to Buffy. He wiped the tears from his eyes and took a few baby taters from the basket.

“Wow Buffy,” Jonah said as he sat back down, “you’re really good at comforting people.”

Buffy shrugged with a smirk. “I have my ways.”

•

•

•

After an hour or so of the group chatting amongst each other and exchanging jokes plus finishing their meal, Bowie handed the check to Amber.

“Hey!” Bex grabbed Bowie by the shoulder. “I am not letting you pay for all of this.” She crossed her arms across her chest.

Bowie chuckled and turned to face his fiancée. “It’s my treat, babe.”

Bex rolled her eyes and smiled. “What am I going to do with you.” She grasped Bowie’s hand.

Andi alerted her parents from behind them. “Hey! Stop flirting, we all want to go hang out in Andi Shack together.”

Bex and Bowie laughed. “Sure, hon. We’ll go get the car,” Bowie pulled Bex away as he waved to his daughter and her friends.

Andi turned to Jonah, Cyrus, and Buffy. “Let’s go sit on the bench while we wait for them.” She suggested.

They walked over to the bench and squeezed their bodies together so they could all fit, but it was cramped and much too uncomfortable so Cyrus stood up. He laid his back against the bricks of The Spoon and watched the sunset in the horizon, a beautiful red, orange, and pink combination of colors illuminating the sky.

The Good Hair Crew sat in comfortable silence as they watched the birds settle into their nests, stores start to close up shop for the night, and the sky slowly become darker by the minute. It was then that they truly realized an important chapter in their lives had closed, and a new one had just opened. Everything around them including themselves was at peace with the world.

That is, until they heard a loud buzz sound coming from inside Cyrus’ pant pocket. The dark-haired boy rushed to grab it, saw the name of the contact, and nearly dropped it from the amount of shock, and reread the name of who sent the text.

TJ Kippen.

Cyrus stared at his phone and his mind drew a blank due to his shock.

Buffy rolled her eyes and got up to grab the phone. “Oh for Pete’s Sake, what does it say?!” She grabbed the phone and read the text message aloud. “‘I’m sorry’.”

Buffy scrolled through the rest of the conversation. “That’s it?!” She yelled, returning the phone to a frightened Cyrus. “That’s all he freaking says after ruining your entire MONTH?” Buffy was ready to snap the tall dirty-blonde haired boy’s neck in half. “I swear if I see his damn pale-ass face I’m gonna-“

“Uh, Buffy,” Jonah interrupted, his eyes so wide it was as if he had seen God himself, “You might want to look behind you.” He pointed a finger to something behind Buffy.

Buffy turned to see Cyrus staring at something while jaw-dropped, and then saw none other than the tall basketball player himself, TJ Kippen. He was wearing an unzipped brown jacket with a grey sports shirt, and had some worn out trousers on. In the dirty-blonde boy’s hand, everyone saw he was carrying a basket of two muffins, one blueberry macadamia, and one chocolate chocolate chip muffin. In his other hand, TJ was holding his phone close to his heart.

TJ’s face was glowing from the multicolored light shining in the sky. His eyes were sparkling from tears, his nose and cheeks stained red. He slowly walked over to Cyrus, the other boy feeling the weight in every step he took.

[allicekitty13]

The Corner Store

When Alice Brandon decided to take a job at a nearby gas station, she had no idea she’d be getting to know the love of her life.

Story Under the readmore

also on AO3 and FFN

It was just another day, the first day off Alice had in almost a week. She was sat at home, rereading Les Mis when she was overwhelmed by the sudden craving for some soda and chocolate. Slipping on her ballet flats, she debated a jacket, it was October but relatively warm for the season. 

Deciding against it, she peeked her head into her mother’s room. “Hey mom, I’m just headed off to the corner store real quick. "The older woman gave a muffled reply indicating that she’d heard her daughter. Mrs. Brandon had been picking up some extra late shifts lately and consequently had been napping quite often.

Alice was 23, free to come and go as she pleased, but she liked letting her mom know where she was headed, it felt like a sign of respect. Once outside, she decided against the car. The store was only a block and a half away, and Alice always loved a good walk. Especially at this time of year. Autumn was her second favorite season, the way the air smelled, the inexplicable energy everybody seemed to feel. It was peaceful to her. 

She made the short trek to the shop, quickly picking out her favorite soda and candy bar combination and adding a bag of chips to save herself a second trip later. Though, everyone knew she’d be back regardless. She’d made frequent trips to this shop daily as far back as she could remember. 

From the day her parents had trusted her to make the short journey alone, stopping here had been a part of her daily routine. She knew every cashier by name; a few even had nicknames for her. Of course, she thought, glancing at the woman working the counter, she was sure some of them didn’t even know she existed. Her thoughts drifted to one of the night shift workers, Edward, whom she wished didn't know she existed. She and Edward had graduated together; he’d always been a bit of a moody jerk. She tried to avoid the place when she saw his vehicle outside. 

Deciding she was happy with her selection, she approached the counter, waiting patiently for the sole cashier to finish what she’d been doing. Rosalie Hale was the longest-running employee Alice could remember, as much a staple in the store as Alice herself. Finding a stopping-place in her paperwork, the tall blonde stood and came over to help the smaller woman. 

Alice had to take a moment to stop and admire the girl. She was roughly five years her senior and was the embodiment of everything Alice aspired to be. Rosalie had a way of commanding all the attention in a room effortlessly, always the epitome of cool and confident. She could be a bitch, but never in a mean way, rather in a way that forced you to respect her. She’d mastered the look of ‘I don’t care.’ in a way that still came off as professional. Every time Alice was in her presence, she was filled with intimidation and admiration. 

Rosalie didn’t speak a word as she rung up the items, only opening her mouth to read off the total. She paused for a moment as she bagged up the snacks. "Hey, you’re Alice Brandon, right?" 

"Yes,” Alice stated in confusion, wondering what on earth Rosalie could want with her, and shaken that someone so impressive could actually know her name.

“Did you apply for a job here?”

“Oh,” Alice had forgotten about that entirely. It had been about two months ago after an argument with her boss. Tiring of the way she was being treated at the grocery store, she’d applied at the small gas station in an act of defiance. “Yeah, I did.”

“Awesome, Ed just fucking informed me he’ll be leaving us in a week. Couldn’t even give me decent notice, the jackass. Anyway, can you start Thursday?" 

Thursday? Alice thought to herself, that was so soon. Besides, she’d smoothed things over at the grocery. She had just picked up a new car payment, though, and it would be nice to have the extra money around to help with that. Making a quick decision, she accepted, "Sure, Thursday sounds great." 

"Perfect, you wanna come back at like eight tomorrow so we can take care of the paperwork bullshit?”

“Yeah.” Alice tried not to sound too excited about the opportunity. “I’ll be here, thanks, Rosalie.”

“Sure, whatever.” The girl waved her hand, indicating she was done with the conversation and walked back over to her paperwork. Alice made her way out of the small shop, trying to look cool and calm as she strode through the parking lot. However, as soon as she reached the street and was out of the shop’s view, she took off in a sprint, excited to get home.

Upon reaching her home, she proceeded to bound up the front steps positively beaming. “Cynthia!” She exclaimed, running to her younger sister’s room. “You’ll never believe what’s just happened!”

“What?” The younger girl questioned, looking up from her phone. Cynthia was 15, a freshman in high school, and usually completely absorbed in her phone. She was a beautiful girl, short for her age with luxurious long blonde hair often pulled up into a bun. She set her phone on the bed next to her and turned to look at her sister intently.

“I was just at the corner store, remember how I applied there about a month ago? Rosalie offered me a job!”

“Who’s Rosalie?”

“The really cool pretty blonde who’s always there.” Cynthia simply shrugged, causing Alice to roll her eyes. “The point is, I just got hired!" 

"That’s cool, I guess.” The smaller girl picked up her phone, clearly uninterested and done talking. 

Alice shook her head lovingly at her sister and went ahead into her own room, collapsing on the bed. Turning her head to stare at her closet, she began contemplating what to wear tomorrow. Deciding she needed some help with such an important decision, she rang up one of her best friends. Of course, Jake didn’t answer, it was typical. Jacob Black was notoriously bad at answering his phone. She sent off a quick text, “Hey Jake, call me back ASAP. I have NEWS!!!!”

Since Jake was a nogo, she tried Bella, who was also no answer. Forgoing the text message knowing her friend would IM her later, she made a final effort and opened Facebook to message Leah.

Leah Clearwater had been working abroad in the UK for the past three years. Calling and texting added up overseas, so the pair had taken to communicating mostly via Facebook. It was only one in the afternoon, making it nine in London; hopefully, that meant Leah was still awake. 

“Hey, lovely," Alice typed. "Got some great news.”

Luckily, she didn’t have to wait too long for a response. “Hey, girly!! What’s the news?”

“You know that corner store by my house? Guess who’s now employed there!”

“Really!! Alice, that’s amazing!! I always knew you’d end up working there. They really should give you a plaque on the wall reading 'Customer of the decade’ lmfao.”

“lol”

“Anyway, love, I’ve gotta go. I’m on my way out for a date!!”

“ooooo Good luck. I want details later!!”

“Lolz, Luv ya

Alice locked her phone and set it gently on the table, overflowing with stuffed animals beside her bed. Perching on the edge facing her closet, she stared intently into the abyss of clothing. Alice nodded to herself with determination and tucked her short dark hair behind her ears. She stood and began to look through her dresses, trying to figure out just what she would wear tomorrow. 

[olaf-likeswarmhugs]

Olaf’s Frozen Adventure Part 1 || Chapter One: September 29th

A/N: So...how did Olaf end up in Swynlake?! The journey began months ago! Things sure are changing in the Icelandic Hollow, and the more they do, the more Olaf has to question. Part One will be told in a series of text conversations between Sindri and Olaf. 

@huldufolk-hjarn​

September 29th

Sindri: when are you going to come rescue me

Olaf: oh no! WHAT IS WRONG Olaf: WHAT MUST I PROTECT YOU FROM THIS TIME

Sindri: boredom Sindri: capitalism Sindri: the sun

Olaf: i will fight the sun at once D< Olaf: i cant fight capitalism though because its a human concept and it confuses me!

 Sindri: because its confusing and stupid Sindri: I didnt tell you yet because I wasnt totally sure but I made a friend Sindri: I think

Olaf: oh??? Olaf: hoppin hailstorms sindri thats amazing!! Olaf: WHO IS THIS FRIEND Olaf: ARE THEY NICE Olaf: where'd you meet? oooo is it the pizza delivery person Olaf: i have always wanted to meet and befriend a real life pizza delivery person

 Sindri: I cant afford pizza so I havent met one of those yet lol Sindri: hes a pixie Sindri: fast-flying Sindri: hes pretty nice. I did find out hes a lot younger than me but I dont think that really matters hes cool and he made me laugh in the supermarket which is a big deal because I hate it there.

Olaf: a pixie? ooooo from the local hollow Olaf: have you gone there yet to find a part time job?? Olaf: i worry you'll run out of pixie dust tell me you asked D:

Sindri: sort of Sindri: im just sort of mad I will have to have two jobs and go to school Sindri: I'll be okay tho probably I dont use a whole lot altho I did go to the hollow recently and that kind of took a good chunk

Sindri: also einar misses you [image of sad pup]

Olaf: EINAR Olaf: i am kissing the bright screen of my mobile telephone device! ahhh its like i can hear his boofs Olaf: wait that distracted me Olaf: 1. what do you mean SORT OF Olaf: 2. I want to hear more about the pixie friend! is he like you? Another Mr. Degree Go-Getter?

Sindri: I didnt ask yet because I'm afraid to Sindri: hes not because hes still in secondary but I mean technically he goes to school so that counts right

Olaf: AHHHH SINDRI should i call their queen on my mobile telephone device?? i will ask for you! Olaf: and what is secondary

Sindri: hes 15 Sindri: and I dont think she has a phone but even if she did then no lol

Olaf: okay but what is secondary?

Sindri: its school like what I'm doing but all the kids have to go until they are like 17 Sindri: olaf did you know humans use tigers to sell breakfast cereal and that cereal is called frosted flakes and it's not even cold

Olaf: wait what are the tigers doing? Olaf: how do they train tigers to sell cereal?

Sindri: well its a cartoon tiger and he wears a scarf

Olaf: oh is he cold? Olaf: because the flakes are frosted? Olaf: oh you said it wasnt though...

Sindri: no its not!! Sindri: and it's not a winter scarf it's like a bandana? I think it's supposed to be stylish? Sindri: if they are gonna put clothes on him it should be pants to be honest

Olaf: sindri that makes no sense Olaf: why would a tiger wear pants

Sindri: WHY IS HE ON THE BOX IN THE FIRST PLACE OLAF

Olaf: maybe he likes cereal! 

Sindri: his nose is blue maybe he is cold

Olaf: oh he's handsome!

Sindri: no

Olaf: i think he's handsome ;3 Olaf: hehehe Olaf: ok im teasing you

Sindri: hes terrifying why is he on my ceral

Olaf: is it good cereal Olaf: i bet its tasty

Sindri: it's really sweet it doesnt taste like corn at all

Olaf: why would it taste like corn Olaf: its...what is a flake actually

Sindri: because they are "corn flakes"

Olaf: if its not a snowflake... Olaf: how does corn come in a flake Olaf: OH Olaf: OH I GOT IT Olaf: the tiger is a corn-flake-talent-fairy! Olaf: there must be fairies who can make flakes of corn!

Sindri: that doesnt exist

Olaf: imagine a cornstorm Olaf: RAINING CORN

Sindri: also hes a tiger

Olaf: well maybe he's a tiger with corn-flake-talent abilities Olaf: there's a talent for everything! Olaf: even turning corn into flakes! Olaf: do you wanna hear about what i ate today!!

Sindri: was it corn flakes

Olaf: no Olaf: [takes a picture of his food because he Would and its like a seafood stew] mmmmmm Olaf: I helped pick out the bones from the trout :3

Sindri: wow I want some of that Sindri: do you wanna know what I ate today Sindri: dry ramen Sindri: OLAF Sindri: OLAFFFFF

Olaf: what!

Sindri: the tiger's name Sindri: guess what it is

Olaf: cornboy Olaf: he's a good cornboy

Sindri: first of all no dont ever say that Sindri: ITS TONY Sindri: TONY THE TIGER

Olaf: really????? Olaf: i would have never guessed that! Olaf: wow! Olaf: Tony the good cornboy!

Sindri: stop

Olaf: what do you have against tony Olaf: you bought his cereal!

Sindri: yeah I did and it was expensive Sindri: Tony is a greedy capitalist

Olaf: ah then i have to fight him :/ Olaf: my corn buddy no more :/

Sindri: I miss you

Olaf: i miss you too! Olaf: this mobile telephone device does not respond to my hugs as warmly Olaf: im hugging it as soon as i send this message though okay so you hug yours too ready go!

Sindri:  ❤️

Olaf:  ❤️

Olaf: when are you done again?

Sindri: this is my first year and there are four

Olaf: ohhhh right Olaf: you told me that Olaf: thats very long! wow

Sindri: yeah it's too long you need to come visit me

Olaf: thats 16 seasons Olaf: i want to, im just scared of the planes... Olaf: i dont know how you did it Olaf: oh and the car to get to the plane

Sindri: it's not that bad I think you could do it Sindri: oh I didnt tell you but my friend Sindri: hes korean and he taught me some of the language

Olaf: wait IM KOREAN

Sindri: I'm sindri hyung now. And he taught me how to say hi

Olaf: wow thats so cool

Sindri: I taught him some icelandic

Olaf: no naughty words i hope

Sindri: and he has two names Sindri: nemo and nam-min Sindri: I'm boring tho I'm just sindri Sindri: can I change your name to cornboy

Olaf: YES Olaf: nemo is cute! does it mean anything

Sindri: I dont know I should ask him Sindri: he probably wont answer for awhile hes grounded

Olaf: ooooo Olaf: is he a bad influence Olaf: did u befriend a bad boy

Sindri: I dont think so? He seems really sweet kinda innocent... Sindri: his dad is nice too you would like him he cooks

Olaf: oh is he a kitchen-talent?

Sindri: healing

Olaf: oh that is not a kitchen talent Olaf: but cooking is very impressive then

Sindri: what did you have to do today speaking of talents

Olaf: bone-picking-talent remember Olaf: i picked out bones for the fish stew

Sindri: you should just cuddle people because I miss your cuddles a lot I think they are magic

Olaf: ahaha well maybe someday someone will need cuddling and i will be there! Olaf: tomorrow Im going to help the messaging fairies i think Olaf: that'll be fun, i'm excited about it. Lots of exercise

Sindri: that'll be fun!

Olaf: yeah, i'll get to talk with a lot of fairies Olaf: ooo i can bring them a message from YOU Olaf: do you want ot say hi to anybody??

Sindri: just tell everyone you give a message to anyway that I said hi Sindri: except viktor

Olaf: yeah viktor can melt off! Olaf: why do we not like viktor again

Sindri: he pushed you into that puddle that one time! I know you were getting in anyway but that was really mean!

Olaf: oh he meant it as a joke! Olaf: or maybe i was too slow Olaf: i dont remember that was a long day Olaf: ahah so many puddles

Sindri: it was mean :/

Olaf: oh i thought it was funny Olaf: you worry too much sindri i was fine

 Sindri: counterpoint: you dont worry enough

Olaf: whats there to worry about? Olaf: it was my slush-puddle-talent day! and you were there too, to pull me out if i needed it.

Sindri: yeah I guess

Olaf: as long as you're with me, there's nothin to fear! Olaf: i know technically you're not with me now Olaf: but theres still nothing to fear! Olaf: because its LIKE you're here with me Olaf: I just think, oh what would sindri do

 Sindri:  😭

Olaf:  😊

Sindri:  😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭

Olaf: hey sindri? Olaf: whenever you're scared Olaf: you should think what would olaf do! too

Sindri [unsent]: I do that already Sindri: I might die tho

Olaf: you wont die Olaf: you rode a plane so you can do anything now

Sindri: you're way braver than me that's how I know you could fly in a plane :) Sindri: his name means graceful boy which honestly is true. He dances

Olaf: thats a pretty name Olaf: did you know my name means king! Olaf: you did i just like reminding you i am royalty

Sindri: yeah well I sparkle and that's way cooler lol

[2henle]

50 questions tag!

i was tagged by @nothaechan

and im tagging @yoonohho and anyone else bc i have no friends

--

1. what takes up too much of your time?

my phone im ALWAYS on my phone . its a problem

2. what makes your day better?

i rlly like looking at my albums,,, mostly my dream one,,,

3. whats the best thing thats happened to you today?

hm idk nothing special happened lol

4. what fictional place would you like to go to?

the answer is 100% hogwarts okay

5. are you good at giving advice?

idk a lot of the time when someone wants to talk to me abt smth i'll obviously hear them out but i dont rlly like to be a decision maker (??) for them,, so i try to give good advice that doesnt involve giving a direct answer so no probably not

6. do you have a mental illness?

ya

7. have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

no and im so happy abt that

8. what musician inspires you most?

idk tbh music itself kinda inspires me not rlly specific artists (?????)

9. have you ever fallen in love?

no

10. whats your dream date?

picnic!! picnics are so cute!!!

11. what do others notice about you?

how stubborn i am lol

12. what's an annoying habit you have?

uh im rlly spacey (?) so i tend to zone out a lot and thats kinda annoying

13. do you still talk to your first love?

i dont have a first love 😌

14. how many exes do you have?

tbh? i only rlly claim, like, 4

15. how many songs are in your playlist?

546 ksjdjks

16. what instruments can you play?

ive been playing the trumpet for like 3 years, i can play the ukulele and im starting to play the guitar

17. what do you have the most pictures of?

either aesthetics or kpop related things/people

18. where would you like to go before you die?

Thailand!! China!!! South Korea!!!!

19. what's your zodiac?

cap sun, sag moon, virgo rising

20. do you relate to it?

too much omg i hate capricorns

21. what is happiness to you?

being free to do what i want!!!

22. are you going through anything right now?

lol too much

23. whats the worst decision youve ever made?

hm thats private

24. whats your favorite store?

hm idk i like journeys a lot i love shoes

25. whats your opinion on abortion?

omg i have too many. women should chose what they want to do w their bodies. period.

26. do you keep a bucket list?

i actually do have one for the summer! its not rlly getting done tho

27. do you have a favorite album?

i could listen to the we go up album everyday of my life and never get tired of it.

28. what do you want for your birthday?

money lol

29. what are peoples first impressions of you?

that im "cool kinda funny but not rlly smart logical" -my best friend, 2019

30. what age do you seem according to most people?

hm like 15 lol

31. where do you keep your phone while youre sleeping?

under my pillow charging (bc i listen to music to sleep)

32. what word do you say the most?

"stupid whore or just whore or just stupid" - my best friend, 2019

33. whats the oldest age you would date?

probably also about 5 years older

34. what's the youngest you would date?

about 5 years bc its only fair

35. what job/career do you think would suit you?

probs like a lawyer or smth

36. whats your favorite music genre?

i rlly like k-hiphop/k-r&b but also alternative and indie and obvi kpop

37. if you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

probably south korea, canada or thailand

38. whats your current favorite song?

breathe by ab6ix, bet bet by nu'est, thrilla killa by vav, heaven by exo and 121U by day6 lol

39. how long have you had this blog?

idk like 7-8 month's?? oop

40. what are you excited for?

thursday bc i get to go over my friends house & swim in my new swim suit for the first time!!

41. are you a better talker or a better listener?

idk it kinda depends if its like a deep conversation then listener but if im mad then i probably wont hear you out lol

42. what is the latest productive thing you did?

i cleaned my whole room yesterday and MAN was it hard

43. what do you want for christmas?

clothes!!! gift cards!!! albums!!!!

44. what class do you get the best grades in?

other than band? english or history

45. on a scale 1-10 how are you feeling right now?

hm feelings wise maybe a 5 but like physically like a 2

46. what can you see yourself doing in 5 years?

honestly i have no idea

47. when did you get your first heartbreak?

n/a

48. what age do you want to get married?

i dont wanna marry

49. what career did you want as a child?

a marine biologist lol

50. what do you crave right now?

attention from chenle

[jamaisvusbf-moved]

prologue: the beginning 2.0

june 12th, 2013

taehyung had banned him from the living room today, saying him and his friends have "important bussiness to attend to and couldnt let little babies like you get in the way of it." jungkook was frankly very offended. he was not a baby, he was 15 turning 16 in like two months, thank you very much.

and "important bussiness" his ass, he could hear shouting and the sound of video games from all the way upstairs.

jungkooks stomach grumbled, he pouted, annoyed. he hasn't had lunch yet today because tae had told him not to leave the guest room just after breakfast, right before his friends came over.

jungkook decided he would risk taes wrath and and left the room he had been to told to stay in "no matter what, lest there be consequences."

he got to the bottom of the stairs and realised that the shouting had died down, jungkook paused for a second, kinda scared that the others had heard him coming down the stairs.

but when tae didnt run towards him weilding a baseball bat, prepared to assault him for not listening to him, jungkook deemed it safe to continue his journey to the kitchen.

which happened to pass by the (very slightly) open door to the living room.

the words, "if only we had a drummer," drift through the crack. jungkook freezes, curious.

"we've been searching for two years, i'm starting to think drummers are a myth made up to stop people who are trying to form bands from forming bands." says another voice.

a scoff, "shut up, namjoon, that sentence barely made sense."

jungkook hadnt meant to eavesdrop, he swears. but hes still stuck on the "if only we had a drummer" because he realised that "hey, im a drummer," and burst through the door before he can think about the consequences and almost shouts, "i play the drums!"

taehyung and the friends he had over (all of whom he had neglected to introduce jungkook too, jungkook thought, a little bit bitterly) jumped and turned to stare at him. "you what?" tae blinks.

"i play the drums." jungkook says a little slower, realising he had rushed and slurred his words together before.

"you what?" taehyung repeats, with wider eyes and a different kind of surprised in his tone.

"i play the drums." jungkook rolls his eyes and says a little louder, just in case his older cousin was going deaf.

"you what?" taehyung repeats again, dumbfounded.

"he says he plays the drums, dumbass." one of taes friends says. a kinda short dude wearing a beanie and a skirt, the owner of the voice that had told namjoon to shut up, flicks him on the back of the head to emphasize his words.

taehyung hisses in pain and turns to the other with a shout of, "dont swear in front of my baby cousin!"

jungkook crosses his arms, taking offense to that. "im not a baby, and ive been living with you for a week, dont be a fucking hypocrite, tae."

someone giggles to his right, and he turns to look at them, half glaring in case theyre laughing at him because they think hes stupid and half smirking in case the other is laughing at him because they think hes funny.

he kinda freezes when he makes eye contact with the guy laughing at him when he realises that, oh my god i didnt know someone with such cute cheeks could have arms like that.

(un)fortunately he didnt have time to stare before his cousin was assaulting him, thankfully without a bat. "dont fucking swear at me, you brat!" tae yelled before he was jumping at jungkook, succeeding in knocking both of them to the floor.

"fucking hypocrite!" jungkook pushed tae off of him, before sitting on his stomach and pinning his arms to the floor under his legs, "yaknow, just cause youre older than me doesnt mean youre stronger."

the guy with the cute cheeks was full out laughing now, bending over into a tall dude wearing a leather jacket beside him, who had started joining in with a high pitched laugh.

jungkook was still not sure whether to be offended or proud, but was saved the trouble of having to choose when the dude whos name he assumes is namjoon, from the conversation he eavesdropped on, steps forward and pulls him off of tae saying, "you said you play the drums?"

"yeah." jungkook says, watching as tae stands up and glares at him, brushing himself off. jungkook sticks his tongue out, feeling satisfied when tae sticks his middle finger up and rolls his eyes.

"since when have you played the drums, brat." tae ignores jungkooks self satisfied grin.

"for about two years now, dumbass." jungkook startles slightly from the uproar his words caused amongst the others.

"youve known a drummer for two years and didnt tell us, we couldve been a full band from the beginning!" yells the dude in the leather jacket, with a higher voice than jungkook was expecting.

"i didnt know he played the drums!" taehyung yells back, putting his arms up in defense of the other raising his hand to hit him.

jungkook frowns. "yeah you did, you were there when i got them for christmas."

taehyung groans at the realisation, "that was a rock band set, brat!" he throws up his hands in frustration,"how was i supposed to know youd get a real set and actually, like, play!"

"i tried telling you about it the next time i saw you, asshole," jungkook crossed his arms, "you told me to leave you alone because i was annoying."

there was a lot of yelling and a lot of arms smacking taehyung. jungkooks not sure how it happened but tae ended up at the bottom of a pile of bodies, hitting the floor with his fist yelling, "i tap out! uncle! uncle! get off of me, you fucking idiots!" while the others ignored him, seeming perfectly content with crushing taehyung.

namjoon crawled out of the pile of limbs and walked up to jungkook, picking up a pair of sunglasses that had fallen off in the chaos. "so, uuuh, what do you think about joining our band?"

[oddballcodger]

You’re Not??

When i was in my late 20′s, i was enamored with this girl whom i thought was the most beautiful creature on earth. She was just my type-Five foot nothing, 95/100 lbs, long hair, perfect little butt, gorgeous and she glowed. She had recently lost her fairly long term boyfriend and was going through a rough time-feeling overly  sad and depressed. She and i had been close both during and after her former relationship. She slept on her couch every night though her bed was 15 feet away. Sleeping on your couch is a known sign of depression believe it or not-something about not wanting to admit to yourself that another day is over and another miserable one is coming up. She was also hitting the bottle and pharmaceuticals pretty regularly.  I hadn’t spoken to her for maybe 2 weeks when the phone rings one night around midnight and it is her. Let’s call her Ashley. The first thing Ashley says to me rather matter of factly is “I decided not to commit suicide”. I’m pretty shocked at this and reply that i really had no idea she had ever contemplated suicide in the first place. She tells me she had just told me  earlier that evening in our last telephone conversation. (No conversation whatsoever had occurred). She didnt sound like she had been drinking (much) and i concluded she must have been speaking with someone else and is somehow very mixed up. After a short while, we conclude the converation, which had been quite awkward due to her puzzling opening line and referring to  a non existent earlier conversation. I had to somehow navigate through that without telling a suicidal person "You Don't Know What You Are Talking About!!"  I immediately start worrying that maybe she IS going to commit suicide. Within 15 minutes of the call termination, I am knocking at her front door. No answer. I knock louder -a total cop knock. She doesn't answer this time either and i dont hear a sound inside. Im nervous as hell but i really don't have a clue as to what to do. This is pre cell phone days. Should i wake a neighbor up and have them call the police or an ambulance? What if i cause all this ruckus and she is just peacefully sleeping inside? She said she wasn’t going to hurt herself after all. Maybe i should just go home? I remember she has a large picture window on the back side of her apartment  on the second floor! I head to the back of her building, hoping there is a tree that maybe I’ll be able to climb and get a look inside. No tree! The back area turns out to be about 10 feet long before it runs into a main street. It’s a scrub area, mostly dirt, small saplings, broken glass, beer cans  and other indications that some drinking parties, probably by teenagers had occurred there. The terrain sloped continuously until it met a wall bordering the sidewalk next to one of the main drags in town. Her building is brick and i soon notice that approximately every fourth brick juts out  slightly, perhaps 3/4 of an inch, at best,  from the others. If this hadn’t been the case, I would have just returned home but now I am more or less forced to try to climb this wall- up a story and a half  to get a peek inside. The alternative is for ME to kill myself the next day if i learn that she had been bleeding to death inside as i returned home. I have zero experience in climbing anything other than a tree and that had been 15 years prior but i soon begin the most difficult ascent  of my life. I’m holding on by my fingertips and the edge of my shoe as i shakily move up this wall which is not meant to be climbed. Im not fully petrified as i figure a fall at maximum height wont kill me or leave me paralyzed but a broken leg and a roll through the glass is quite possible. I am definitely more than scared.  I truly believe i beat the odds by making it to the top without some sort of disaster or incident. I get a good look as Ashley’s couch. Empty, other than a rumpled blanket. I note a couple of more things like an ashtray and half a glass of some liquid on the coffee table that tells me she didn’t depart that long ago. I safely descend and make the short trip back home, somewhat relieved but still having serious doubts on  just what the hell had happened. How could she have left in the 10-15 minutes it took me to get over there? She wasn’t going anywhere but to sleep when i had spoken with her. Was she standing on a bridge somewhere? I worried most of the night. The next day I am still looking for answers but none were to be found. Perhaps 2-3 days later i finally reach her. She vaguely hints  that whomever she had called before myself, had arrived with the police minutes before i had (apparently) and took her to a hospital. She had indeed made made some sort of attempt on her life but im fairly certain it was half hearted -the proverbial cry for help. She never truly understood what she had done to me that night as in her mental state she didn’t  really remember calling me or much else from that especially turbulent evening. She had been in an altered state -one of detachment and/or amnesia. I was never real sure because i had no experience with anyone taking the mental journey she was on during those days.

I’m happy to say  within a few months, she had found a new boyfriend and regained the better part of her mental state-hopefully permanently. A few years later, after another break-up she moved in with me (platonically) for 6 months or so. We never had an argument.  After 30 years of not hearing from, or even of her, perhaps 4 years ago she calls me out of the blue. She wanted to talk but relayed she couldn't speak right then, rather she would call me later that night. She really wanted to catch up.  In a minute Ashley was gone and i never heard from her again. As out there  as she was, I still  miss her and think often of her and smile.

[heraldshaka]

Top Right: November 2013. Dear Journal, Its been a while so Im going to do a long update. Number one Dad is gone. Hes in prison cause he stole a boat, totalled two perfectly good cars, tried to kill mom in a drunken rampage and drunk driving. Honestly I say good ridance. Joel has a girlfriend now. Brooke WInn. I was pretty pissed for a while because she was the first girl I ever had a crush on and the first girl to give me her number. But after accidently seeing a picture of a conversation between them to (It seriously was an accident) I can see that she really likes Joel and Joel really likes her. As suspected now Joel has had his first kiss, date, and girlfriend. I’ve honestly wanted to do these things for a while largely out of curiosity but I decided to wait until I’m at least 15 years old. Speaking of age, I wrote a letter to my 30 year old self. Anyways my huge passion for the past year has been film making. Unfortunately I dont have the neccesary equipment nor a Job to earn some money but I think I want to do film making for the rest of my life. Me and Josh have been doing a lot of spear fishing recently but I am yet to kill a fish. Something I forgot to mention about Joel’s girfriend, another reason I’m not angry is because I decided long ago I would wait until at least 15 to start dating so I was never going to make a move but Joel did so It’s not like he stole her because she was nevermine. as of the rest of the family, Bria 

Bottom left:  is dating Thomas kreuser now, Josh is playing dating ping-pong with Lydia and its really mean. Lydia’s looking for something serious and Josh is a horn dog. Joel has a phone now and wont stop texting or calling Brooke. Josh, Bia and mom are rarely family interactive any more. Baylee still takes pretty much anything she can lay her sticky paw on but she is a bit more respectful. Jonah has becom “that  little brother”., The kind you NEVER want around friends. Something applicable to all the little kids is that their absolutely disgusting and bossy. Brenna is pretty disobedient but still not as roudy as Jonah or Brooke. Brooke is even more annoying as she was. Whinnes about everything, disgusting, STILL craps her pants and is insanely disobedient. As for me, I’ve fallen in love with music and film making. I take most of the house responsibility. I try to keep it clean and in control but usually end up just hiding out in my bedroom when ever I get a chance. I don’t play much video games any more. Over the past year I have matured a lot but I can rarely noticibly show it because to all my friends I’m the funny guy which is usually fine but sometimes I really wish I could just open up. I got to the farmer’s market alot now and now Jesse is my best friend. He’s very funny, honest, trustworthy. Which I can truly respect and I can’t say yo pretty much any of my friends. Me and Josh work out now so thats cool. But stil I spend most of my time listening to music and thinking about filming.

Bottom Right: Christmas is in a month and a half and if I could get just one peice of film equipment I need to start I would be happy. There is nothing I currently want more than to start filming and directing videos. I’ve done some drawings which I’m a little bit proud of, but I’ve also thought up this big animated TV series. Like the next Avatar: The last airbender which is my favorite TV series ever. I was thinking about having three nations and one kind of secret nation. The protagonist is a young teenageer I haven’t thought up a good name yet but hafter his entire family is killed a few years before due to the war between teh three main nations, he sets out for revenge on the people, specifically everyone who was in that squadron who killed his family, he begin’s to learn the powers of one of the nations the ncomes upon a clue suggesting that the powers of each nation which are believed to be a birth right to only some people of their nation, can actually be learned by anyone. Throughtout the rest of his Journey he comes across a new companion of each nation and begins to learn each of the powers which are Light which is used by a peolpe of monks, Necrocity like using darkness or even the dead as weapons and Nature. The power of having control over living plants and sometimes even subdue animals. Theres a lot more to it that I’m not going to get into so I’m signing out for now.

Left: Nov, 2013. Dear Journal. Today I’m going to go very in depth about something I haven’t told anyone. Joel’s girlfriend, Brooke Winn. I REALLY like her. In my last entry I said it didn’t bother me anymore but it does. I know I said I wont even try to get a girlfriend until I’m at least fifteen and I stand by it. But yesterday she came over to our house for 6 hours right after she hung out with us at the market an I saw first hand how much they care about one another and they really do. But it sucks for me because I still really like her. Plus I met her first, got her number first and I still remember so much about her. Her birthday is in march, her favorite movie is Clockwork Orange, she’s a vegetarian because her brother dared her to do it for a few months and she just went with it after that, she likes Avatar and Pewdiepie just like me, she wants to go into the navy when she’s older, her favorite video game is League of Legends. Also without me, Joel and her might never have met. I remember all this and some more because for a while I kinda thought we had something special. Now shes dating my brother and I may never know if we did. Last night was the worst night of my life because I spent all night avoiding the girl of my dreams because shes dating my brother. Is it just a little crush that will blow away eventually? Maybe. but when I’m around her, when I read some of the things her and Joel say to eachother, it feels like a lot more than a silly crush.

Left: Dec 3, 2013. Dear Journal, well I have obtained some very shocking information. Whilst Joel was playing League of Legends he tabbed out to face book where he had been messaging Brooke Winn and I noted she said “I love you too.” As said before, I really like Brooke in more than a friendly way and I promised myself I wont try to get a girlfriend until I’m minimum 15. Probably not until I have my license but I can’t help but wonder “Did she ever have feelings for me?” Because I taught her how to dance, she  gave me her number. The swing after we spent nearly 2 hours just talking and dancing. Obviously I never made a move but I always had feelings for her. It’s very possible that she was waiting for me to make a move and got impatient. That almost happened to Joel but he made a move and now They’re in love and I wonder “What if?” What if I made a move? Would we be dating now or would she have turned me down and then we’d be akward acquantices? I can’t help but wonder.

Right: Dec 14, 2013. Dear Journal, Today we have Brooke and Thomas over (Bria and Tom are dating) for this tree decoration crap and I realize its getting easier for me to be around Brooke Winn. I still have feelings for her but due to my resistance I can be a little easier around her. But it’s still pretty weird because Joel knows I like/liked her so we rarely get to talk Just me and her. And when we do its hard for me to think of a conversation topic because all I can think of around her is the fact shes dating my Brother! It sucks so badly especially beecause I do still like her and she is DATING MY BROTHER! Its a terrible feeling but one I’m going to have to live with. Part 2. Well I have concluded Dec 14 2013 and it sucks. Yesterday was cool but today I spent 3hrs at a parade. But is that enough? Oh no! Throughout that time I simply stood idly by while Joel and Brooke continuosly made out and cuddled throughout that time. Thomas hasn’t turned into a fag due to his relationship like Joel which is good so we hang out a good bit but it still ended with me as a 5th wheel.