#im PEEING why are they like this
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ASSHOLE??? DONT COME AFTER MY BOY GIDEL LIKE THAT???
#leona voice- “he smells like pee.” gidel- 🧍#UNCALLED FOR ASSHOLE#moments like this are why im glad i don't know how to change my character name 🙂↕️#twst#twisted wonderland#leona kingscholar#twst gidel#fellow honest#playful land event
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i found a book abt the anti lawn movement at the library & decided to sit out in my yard & read it. but ironically there was a neverending barage of power tool noises making it difficult to focus. so i walked to a nature park near me in order to escape the dreaded sounds. almost stopped at the mowed picnic table area bc i hate walking but fortunately pushed forward and made myself walk up an annoying hill to an area that is a preservation of a native oak savanna & sat down against a tree near the edge of the path & did my reading there. and honest to god that was a 100/10 experience. there was something so powerful abt being in a preserve for a locally native habitat while reading abt the impacts homeowners can have on native plant preservation! it powered up my energy towards my life mission (evangelize abt enviormentally sustainable gardening to every single person who comes within a 10 ft radius of me) by like. 15 points. also a deer walked up to me and that was super cool
#i was there for like 3 hours and i wanted to stay longer#but the sun was setting and i was hungry and had to pee super bad#gonna try to do this tommorow as well. bc ik winter is gonna hit soon#and then its not gonna be plausibe#i still heard Industrial Noises up there but i used my noise cancelling headphones#& that blocked most of it out#ive finallt started progressing on writing persuasive essay on this subject#previously id focoused my efforts mostly on reaserching the practical side of like. how to covert ur yard#+ what plants to use. etc#but now im looping background writing abt the actual reasoning behind it#which like. i feel like i needed zero actual persuasion to get on board w this. which is why i didnt#dedicate to much time to reaserching the 'why'#but i do a whole lot of promoting this subject to people i meet so i might as well read up &#try & create a more comprehensive & detailed resource to send to ppl#after i give them my Rip Up Your Lawn talk#i mean i give them the gardening advice resources. but i think some ppl need extra convincing & thats what this is for#LAWN LAWN RIP UP UR LAWN. KILL UR LAWN PLANT REAL PLANTS <3
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how it started:
one ren peeing twaddle conversation later:
#ria.txt#💀💀💀#this isn't even including the 'blimey ren i'm worried for you'#me at the start of the stream: funny how ren calls him unlucky with the ladies when 70% of his fans are down bad for him#me in tears in the middle of the stream: with all respect i understand now.#false's chats are environmental storytelling#also the way she came back and was like 'what happened' and then the pee convo and she left 💀#and ren said he scared her away 💀#its so funny how it started out as like :) yeah i'll help you with vh. lets discuss british biscuits. whats a rusk.#and then: its vulnerable when i eat with someone. and then the pee convo#normal ren stream trajectory but its stillllllllll so fucking funny#false at the start 'don't leave me alone 🥺'#false at the end 'bye im never seeing you again'#false and doc next time they meet up with ren irl: 🧍🧍#nooooooo bc why did he have to talk abt All Of That with two ppl he met irl and has prob ate with#ren's mods are the real heroes of the story#AT LEAST THE RUSK DESCRIPTION WAS NORMAL.#fuck it. im tagging ren#rendog#the rd difference#pogsupremacy
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what kink should I get off to talking about in therapy today?🤫😶🌫️
#last week he was kinda grilling me about why i get up to pee at night so much and I ended up talking about my piss kink for 20min lol#so this week i should talk about another🤭 help me decideee.. i got like an hour and a half to think#but also im about to shower lol#rosies stuff#ignore me
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joel has such a small bladder i need to make him piss himself.
#mine#is it still block men if im thinking abt the real guy.#like. i dont rlly watch m.cc but i clocked on bc i was like ooh facecam. heehee joel#and all the chat? telling joel to go piss bc he had clearly said he needs to pee. like. bro. why ur bladder so fucking tiny
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wait did yall know u can just get ur psych to send u ur notes to see if they’re talkin shit in them ?
#stream#lol @ his ‘diagnosis’ or whatever#i’m normal fuck u#i’m the most regular person ever#i need to pee so bad but i like holding it bc i believe that it’s like strength training for ur bladder but im like 90% sure it is not but i#will lie to myself#like ok#why did u write that in there i don’t think u should’ve wrote THAT down like that was OFF THE RECORD ??????#he’s writing ‘shadows’ in there like bro ??? 😭😭😭 make it sound BETTER ? call them PEOPLE ? rude as hell honestly#to be honest reading it back & having to be like ‘ok if anyone else read this on its face it’s pretty bad but bc it’s U it’s ALL REASONABLE#& RATIONAL’#bc it literally is ???#i think my fav notes are ‘slightly exaggerated gesticulation’ & ‘exaggerated vocal intonation’ that’s just ALSKALSKALKSLKALKSLAKSLAJ#RUDE ??????#I TALK W MY HANDS DIE
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what an extra strong highball does to a mf
#hi ive had this drafted up for a really long time and im not sure why i havent hit ‘post’ yet but here~#me facíl..wait that means ‘easy’..fuck#i cant express just how many of these signs i saw on this trip 🤣#love how they all were ‘no pissing’ instead of ‘no peeing’ or something equally less crude 🤣🥰#hmmmmm#im p sure this was also the day that my brother said that me liking smap was not weird/strange at all….#…drunk words are sober thoughts and all that#(🥺)
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#i feel like novel is def gonna be winning but who knows#one thing to know about me is i always want things to be longer#except for movies stop that why is it 3 hours i need a bathroom break#at least make it have 3 parts so there is a bathroom break#if i go to see a play thats two hours and a half i get 15 minutes to go pee or get a snack#WHY AM I SUPPOSED TO SIT THROUGH 3 HOURS OF A MOVEY SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO STAY HYDRATED MIRANDA#idk why im ranting abt movies here this is abt novels vs short stories#anyways my point is i enjoy spending more time with characters and the story so a novel always wins#even tho there are some short stories that are so impactful they stay with me forever#like. omelas comes to mind#but yeah
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#i’m tired of feeling like no matter what i do nobody wants to listen to me#every time trans people come up it’s always the trans women and i get it#trans women are at a higher risk of violence than trans men#but nobody ever fucking thinks about trans men#and i expressed this to my mom bc im fucking terrified of what my future could look like#especially with my increasing number of health issues and problems#and she fucking just#talked over me and told me why trans women are at a greater risk and how cis men can get away with anything#and i’m like i feel like you didn’t even listen to what i had to say#nobody thinks about how trans men feel when it comes to all of this#it’s always trans women this trans women that#and this isn’t bUt WhAt AbOuT tHe MeN thing#it’s literally#trans men are erased from the conversation point blank period#nobody thinks about the passing trans guys having to go into the women’s room and could possibly get attacked for following the rules#or how non passing trans guy could get attacked for using the men’s room#i don’t pass i know i don’t pass and im terrified to pee in places i know don’t have gender neutral bathrooms#like it’s great my mom is worried about everything for me that could affect my life#but she’s not the one afraid to use the bathroom in public#she’s not the one who dies a little inside every time she gets misgendered#she’s not the one who’s trans#yet i’m still being erased bc nobody cares about me as a trans man
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Man I have no idea how to research gender affirming care for nonbinary peeps, cause like I'm nonbinary and I want my gender to be affirmed! But like, is what I want even physically possible? Do I even know what I want? What if I don't like hormones? But if a surgery I want requires hormones?
Can I control+alt+delete my tits without taking testoroni? Google gives me indecisive answers, I wish I could go out and just buy some books on the trans spectrum and read a catalog of trangender care history and options
But I don't even know if that exists, and if it does, I'd be so boned if my parents found me with such books
Why is my gender confusing me so, it makes me feel my mind was placed in the wrong form of being
#im big stupid in the ways of transistioning#transgender#nonbinary#what is gender#for context my brain has on off been informing me it thinks i should also have a penis and not just a vagina#however it refering to having a penis that can ejaculate not one for like being able to pee standing up#my brain keeps asking me why we weren't born with both forms of gentalia that are both functional#its driving me a little coocoobananas if you cant tell
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ive already made plans to dye my hair orange so its too late now but the idea was to dye my hair the same colour as the representative ribbon for brain cancer and for some reason i thought it was orange? its actually grey
#the ideeeea was whenever someone asked me why i dued my hair orange i can like. talk abt gliomas and spread awareness#but that is the wrong colour. like i can just say its for her and still do the awareness thing as my own private prompt but also. i am#not a smart person#cancer ment#shes also back on steroids and trying her hardest to make care really hard and pushing everyone away bc she doesnt want to figuratively#poison anyone so this seems like a nice gesture like im doing this thing for you bc i care no matter how hard you want me to not#man i gotta peeso much#i had to take 2 pee breaks writing this post
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SOMEONE PLEASE IM NOT OK RN AT ALL I CANT BREATHE
#why is he so fine???#I LOVE BASEBALL 😍😍😍#his hair here too omg#im like peeing#brandon dicamillo#brandon dicamillo x reader#rake yohn#jackass#cky4#cky3#cky2k
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another morning another free bus journey..
#feeling okay this morning.. im usually better in the mornings its just when the meds wear off that i start to lag a bit#and ruminate ahh. no point ruminating today tho cuz im not gonna be able to have the conversation i want until tmr at the earliest#was nice to call my friend yesterday tho i did complain a little but not abt anything that bad but they were still v sympathetic#which was rly nice of them 🥹#ive been having some difficult dreams these last couple days abt my mum for some reason. well i kind of know the reason why#like we're very similar ppl even if i cant talk to her abt everything in my life bc she would find it too upsetting#so i think my mind includes her in dreams bc shes like. the only person i feel true emotional solidarity with#like she experiences emotional dysregulation + rsd in the same way i do which has sucked for us both but just. we're not alone innit#anyway its ok just dreams its not real anyway#and climbing tonight YEAAAHHHH i just gotta make it thru today#itll all be okay one way or another. aight i need to clock in so i can use the work bathroom i gotta pee rl bad#.diaries#FUCKKKKK MY PERIOD JUST STARTED.....its late why does it have to come TODAY#please dont let the cramps be too bad so i can still climb later 😭😭😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
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Daigo being like... the sex kitten of the fandom is so fucking funny I do not understand AT ALL
#dont get me wrong i think daigo is hot i do#and loveable#but why is everyone peeing on him???#why do people think hes getting mad dick?????#he literally looks sick and stressed all throughout 3 4 and 5 like#he does not seem the fella who is getting much dick#if any tbh#im not against daigo getting dick i just think its really funny
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me if thinking abt the most kinky depraved filthy tickle scenarios was illegal
#like why can’t i stop thinking abt being tickled to hysterics and begging for mercy only to get ignored#even better have them mock you and coo at you while you’re hysterical with laughter and babbling nonsense 🤣#idk been getting off to the idea of being tickled till i pee myself recently. like mean absolutely sadistic ler…#…tickling u harder when u beg for a break bc u can’t take it or ur like omg im gonna pee and they just KEEP GOING. 😵💫#like that’s so HUMILIATING 😭😭😭😭.and then they add to it by mocking you/making fun of you for that. 😭😭😭#me when my thing for humiliation and tickling come together to form the most depraved filthy scenarios#i’m fucking insane .#i’m crazy#😞😞😞😭😭😭😭i wanna be tickled to fucking tears PLEASEEEEE i just wanna be crying and begging for mercy only to have them laugh in my face.#.like a fucking sadist and just keep going or maybe even tickle harder 😵💫😵💫😵💫 as they tease u with the cruelest shit ever .
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If i had to pick (and lbr you do) between either roman or tomgreg being canonically gay and explored in the series id pick roman 100%. Tomgreg going canon would set gay rights back by like 40 years
#like its still a big tv show they can only have one gay person on it#succ#i think tomgreg will always be reaching new insane heights of whatever the fucknis wrong with them#but roman. roman.#the gerri thing was completely a mommy issues deal#roman ‘for reasons of … we dont know why i cant pee next to other men’ roy#i enjoy watching his torment and quite frankly i cant think of anything that would turn him inside out with misery#quite like the slow tortuous realization that everything his father is disgusted by in him#are the things that make him feel happy and at peace and loved#i hope his interactions with mattson are confusing and scary and addicting and he keeps going back#mencken works too but im sorry that more boring.2 me. ohhh hes into it bc facism bad but he likes when thing bad we get it.#thats the same thing hes been doing tho#now imagine: rome but hes in a relationship with someone whos a little fascinated by him#this dettached deadeyed weirdo who doesnt roll his eyes when he speaks#and instead seems to listen to every word and remember what he says#and who maybe. just maybe. even cares about him#like mattson would definitely treat him like a bug under glass but roman ‘dog cage and chocolatte cake’ roy#would easily mistake that for love#idk not articulating it well. might write a fic abt it. we’ll see#tomgreg canon truthers btw no hate i lov the ship sorry if this shows up in the tag#but theyre definitely going to be in weird limbo forever & ever#i think at best tomgreg will become canon? (audible question mark)#i think they could fuck nasty and weird on screen and tom would start gaslighting greg into thinking it didnt happen#because nothing like. nice or good happens in the show its about misery#i want tomgreg to stay on ao3 so i can read abt tom healing after leaving waystar#anyways!#chatter
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