#ill prolly like get hate for this but like | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kaiserkisser · 1 month ago

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can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )

#tw vent #yes ik i have a vent blog #but idk why i dont wanna go there #ill prolly delete this in a while + if i vent here (which ill try not to) ill always tag it #but if any of yall aren't fine with it pls do lmk!!! ill stop <3 #Anyways.#fucking hell i hate this.#dude #i very specifically told them to hurry the fuck up THEY were the ones making us late #i have told them a hundred times the minimum time i jeed to get ready #i told them this morning too that you guys make us late then put it all on me #nad she went like oh no dear dont worry that wont happen #WELL GUESS WHAT BITCH #and like the lecture and huge ass scolding and then cold shouldet ive been getting from BOTH of them before i left for coachinh #im just tired atp #idk its not even that big a deal this happens everyday #i dont know how to feel #idk if im even rly feeling anything atp #its just that i really fucking hate being here #I wanna get the fuck out #but thing is this makes me feel kinda guilty occasionally #for eg a few days ago i was rly sick and she took care of me kinda #and then that made me feel bad for hating her #but then things like this happen and i cant help it and i feel so conflicted #i dont want to stay here i know that for sure but i feel guilty for it #if i speak im being rude and backtalking #if i dont speak im being rude and ignoring #the fuck am i supposed to do????#she always tells me to 'stay silent and just hear it'#and when i do that she keeps shouting again and again and finally i say smth bc although its extremely fucking dumb of me to open my mouth

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iamstuckinthevoid · 19 days ago

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I just realised that I fucking hate my name

like its so fucking girly???? like I get that was the point but REALLY??? THAT FUCKING FEM????

god id rather go by the start of my middle name but the hazbin jokes would make me actually fucking do it bro

or I could change it to something similar and just be a furturama character forever

#ykw if i get called that shit im getting violent #LIKE IM FUCKING SORRY FOR HAVING AN ANGLICISED VERSION WASNT MY FUCKING FAULT I HATE IT TOO!!!#like i hate being called my irl name!!!#i can tolerate it but fuck!!!#and i cant even go by a masc verseion of my name #id rather be called val or fry or smth but im gonna get INSULTED because valentino is a fucking hazbin character and every1 ik has seen it!!#I HATE THIS SHIT!!!!!#WHY COULDBT I HAVE BEEN FUCKING NORMAL!!!#I HATE MYSELF AND EVERYTHING #woah that should have been for the notes app #sorry chat at drama club we had to say where our names come from and i just realised i hated it so fucking much #like this bitch who tried to fucking strangle me has the same one and shes such a bitch about it!!!#and i cant even go by a masc berskon of my name #because #it #doesnt #fucking #EXIST!!!!!#god fucking damn it #oh well #if i get a therapist ill prolly talk to them abt this #i hate myself #anyway sorry about that one #really should have put this in notes but once i get going i really get going #keys speaks #keys speaks of irl #trans #genderfluid #complaints department #vent

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hepbaestus · 5 months ago

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:|

TW: covid mention/illness/coughing (nothing graphic or major)

#i fucking hate being ill #after getting covid 2 years ago. every time i get ill the cough stays so. much. longer. than it needs to #like that was my remaining symptom from covid and that shit lasted MONTHS #because it's now actually stopping me from hanging out with friends because i sound like I'm coughing up a fucking LUNG every time #and i wanna go see people and not have them worry about me being ill (which ik they'd do anyways but less so)#and it's slowly getting to the point where it's hurting my chest to cough because it's so often #i just hope it leaves soon because i want to go home next week for my brother's birthday and i don't want to be coughing the whole way #it also doesn't help that i was asthmatic as a kid/teen so my lungs prolly aren't the greatest anyways #just realised how ranty this is so if by chance you read all of this; i hope you're doing well :)

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sorrowfulwill · 1 year ago

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istg if I have covid or something I am going to do something sooo mildly infiuriating

#don’t worry about me it’s probably just a cold #being sick lmao #since covids popping back up of course I immediately go with the worst possible option of my illness #again prolly just a cold #and even if it was I have Al my necessary vaccines so I’ll most likely be fine #sucky cold #also I hate those weird burps you get when your sick #Like dude I JUST brushed my teeth you ruined everything #alright I’m done

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cuz-reasons · 7 months ago

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What if I exploded? What then?

#this has been my mood for like two weeks now #well actually the las couple months if were being honest #but esp these last couple weeks #im just tired and stressed and anxious as fuck #and now i got a 7pm 3hr exam tonight #AND work tmr cuz LITTERALY no one else was available #so i get to go do poorly on this exam cuz im tired from work this morning and its right through my normal dinner time #and im not able to really eat now cuz im too anxious and i gotta catch the bus in like 15mins #and then come home and basically go straight to bed #so i can work an 8hr shift tmr #aauaaugghhggg #AND i got another exam ill prolly do WORSE on on the 19th #but that ones at 9 so like not much better but id rather that than the 7pm one #and that class has a group project too thats due the same day cuz it was the last day it can be handed in #i also HATE that class so much #im just like fuckim burnt out i think #straight up considering dropping out if i fail again i dont even care anymore #or at least taking a SOLID YEAR off before finishing #cuz christ alive i need a proper fuckin break #anyways i kinda went off here #oopsies!#oh well

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this-doesnt-endd · 3 months ago

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Everyday ive had to get up real early then im like busy all day and ive just commited to this life for the rest of the year

#i have my orientation in the morning and i have to wake up early and go into the fucking zoom meeting portal #cause idk if i have a general orientation then a 1 on 1 or if its just 1o1 #then i prolly have to go to the actual financial aid office and get the numbers i need and get my id #and im assuming that the one on one meeting is where ill make my schedual which is fine but i wish this was all in person #id be so much easier also like if u want me to get excited abt going to school a zoom meeting is gonna do the exact opposite #tbh im anxious #itll be nice to get hours once work picks up but i hate to think that like in 2 months its gonna be school work school work work work work #and like 1 random day off in the week till november when its no days off #im still gonna have my fun im still gonna hang out with my friends and go to events and see movies my days will just be very long lmao #everything always works out

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enevera · 7 months ago

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i dont wanna count the weeks i just feel sad

#i hate crying and the only thing worse than crying is crying in public so no crying #we are not fucking crying get a fucking hold of yourself bitch #anywya its been like just over a month #what an awful fucking existence #had to talk to my therapist last week abt the fact that everything is just kinda horrible rn #nothing is good eerything even things i like and make me happy are just a little bit awful #bc i feel awful #i dont wanna eat i dont wanna go places i force myself to exist when id rather just curl into a ball and fade into nothing #quit fucking crying bitvch this is pathetic get a fcuking hold of yourself your moms dead get over yourself theres no time to be sad rn #got shit to do and a fuck ton to worry abt put the emotions in a little fucking box go get a pastry or smth jfc #maybe ill do some work #if my hands would stop shaking thatd be nice i probably need to eat but i rlly just dont want to hm #id go home but i prolly shouldnt drive when im in this sorta mood :/#the mood swings are sooooo fucking bad btw lmao #vent #idk how to tw tag this ugh #this isnt even abt anything im just talking rn

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nomaishuttle · 1 year ago

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sometimes u put yr playlist on shuffle a song comes up and you have to put another song in the queue immediately as soon as it comes on bc it makes you think of that song

#this is abt aura by ghost and pals Sry everytime i hear it im like a fiddle This is just like devil went down to georgia and then i have to #put devil went down to georgia in the queue #i think its a fiddle innit.. it sounds like a fiddle but im also NOTORIOUSLY bad at telling instruments apart. <- guy who once couldnt tell #if something was a guitar or a piano i actually rly rly rly rly dont wanna get into it okay.#i guess you didnt know it but i am a fiddle player too 😏😏#sry. the other thing this post is abt is kiss me and ladies in their sensibilities sweeney. obviously those r connected #but if ladies in their sensibilities comes on by itself i quite literally couldnt be assed so everytime i have to put kiss me on instead an #add lits to the queue. bc them together is like the best song i ever heard its just that the beginning of lits is just kind of boring It #does get stuck i my head sometimes but the supreme part is the end thats Basically just a reprise of kiss me #but also theyre kind of the same song anyways at least o wowww i was just typing in tempo with the fiddle that was awesome. at least on the #2012 soundtrack aka the best one talk to the hand or dont i dont wanna hear it. well i do want to hear it it being the 2012 london cast #recording of sweeney todd starring michael ball and imelda staunton. ANYWAYS!! in that one the songs lead in to eachother #ive listened to all the other soundtracks but idr if they do that.. well ill tell u the movie doesnt bc it doesnt have kiss me. which is #just so. the johanna anthony romance doesnt rly have much substance in the first place and yr taking away like. their duet together. ok....#AND yr taking away the end part of lits? the best part of that song? whatever its fine its fine.#if anybody is curious my ranking of casts is 2012 > obc > movie > 2006 i fucking hate 2006 or 2005 or whatever i hate it sm it makes my #blood literally boil im sry. i fucking LOATHE it idk what it is well i do but this post is already 5000000 years long. idt the new one is #out fully yet... i was ok with the songs i have heard but idk where id rank it yet. i should prolly check if the full things out yet omg so #me and my lampstie (way of saying my siblings name if theres something deeply wrong with you) can listen :]

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widevibratobitch · 1 year ago

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#tw ed #saw a picture of myself from when i was *checks notes* at my fucking worst with my ED but that meant i was also Thinner.#i really should Go Back huh. maybe if i did i wouldnt feel. Like This.#it'd prolly mean id start losing my hair again which. not a big fan. BUT.#if i was really dedicated i could also lose my period which. huge fan. that was one of the best things that ever happened to me tbh #i could have it all back. maybe i could even get farther than the last time. all it would take is uhh feeling utterly fucking miserable #having no energy for the most basic stuff let alone singing and thinking about nothing and i mean NOTHING but calories 24/7.#but hey. maybe i could like. lose 5 kg for my troubles and then gain back twice as much when i decide again that i just Cant Live Like This #totally worth it huh #anyway. i miss hating my body A Little Less and people being Nicer to me and everyone telling me how good of a job im doing #and encouraging me to keep going. and i miss the sense of Accomplishment and the Pride and the Not Feeling Disgusting #or at least Making Up For It by just. not eating lol #cause like its not like im actually much better mentally am i lmao clearly im not. only now im both miserable AND fat.#obviously ill never be s/kinny let alone as s/kinny as my friends. ill still look like a glitch in the system and a mistake next to them.#but if i have to be miserable anyway i could at least be. less f/at about it right. maybe then ill be worth something <3 #...and other delusions you keep cultivating because there's something deeply and inherently wrong with you #my new bestseller coming soon to your nearest bookshop dont miss it its only $free.99!

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snekdood · 2 years ago

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id love to be able to have more hope in my life like you guys think people are supposed to but thats pretty hard when theres people who want believe the worst thing about me no matter how true it even is

#maybe if you came up to me and admitted you believed dumb shit and were sorry that'd be one thing but like #yall dont care about victims lol #so why would you care about my mental wellbeing anyways #idk i wonder why the guy who sought refuge in progressive spaces since they pretend to care about rape victims might feel hopeless with #the 0 support hes getting #give me a reason theres good in the world or prove to me you're just as self absorbed as everyone else #and only care about shit if it directs you personally #if it directly effects you*#otherwise the worlds apparently your playground where you get to point at whoever and decide they're either 100% toxic or not #and its just this fun lil game of black and white for you rather than there being real people with lives invovled #i hate everyone on this site and the only reason a lot of yall are 'progressive' is for your own self interest #like you genuinely only care bc shit effects you. thats prolly why plenty of yall refuse to see trans men as oppressed #bc the shit we go through doesnt directly effect you and thats how you'd probably normally act if you weren't trans/non binary 🤷#aka a transphobe #prove me wrong or ill just keep going on about my life believing this bc quite frankly its the most true feeling thing ever #bc from my angle yall are some of the most selfish people.

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strayheat · 2 years ago

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im starting to feel the "dead" in deadlines

#one big one due tmrw #but i might be getting feedback on it and having to fix some parts up till early feb so the deadline doesnt necessarily end the work here #another one till next friday and sometime after ill have to go to uni and present it so its another soft line #and then theres this vague one that doesnt have a date yet so im calling it the deadarea #thats prolly gonna be due mid february and will also require a presentation #and THEN theres another one that doesnt have a date yet but its The Big Boy Project and im gonna give a presentation and answer questions #and THATS WHEN I FINISH UNI WOOOOOOOOO #i so cannot wait i CANT #and i hate that so many dates are not set yet cause i cant have a specific day to wait for until its over and done #cause rn the only way i can look at it is that i'll for sure be a free man before march #which is a month and a half away and thus doesnt seem particularly optimistic #but hey at least tmrw ill have one thing 98% taken care of and im already done with the hard part of the second thing #im just. tgeres so much work and its already been weeks of this and theres weeks more?? motivation is negative #one good thing is that time passes no matter what u do. so every second of this is inevitably getting me closer to the end !!!!#yeah. i sound a lil bit like a negative nancy but rly im mostly positive just tired heh #straytalks

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blood-sta1ned-blonde · 7 months ago

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haha nvm im 104.4 so thats less than start of this deal which was 106 but i look so fucking big today lol so thats super cool and fun and not making me consider slamming my head against the door again n just letting ppl on snap get off to that bc how how how how fucking how

#theres no way im that dehydrated but now i dont wanna eat or drink like i can not tell them n ill prolly only throw up once #if i get it under control fast enuff but i say this like im not the one who hates nausea more than like anything #♡

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worldblight · 10 months ago

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My gay ass wolf bullshit is acting up again

#its prolly coz the moon's filling out #or something #shit dawg idk i hate being otherkin this is embarrassing #i wanna chill here and be human but my body is acting up on its own #cant even control when the animal body language shit starts up #it gets on my nerves sometimes #one thing they dont tell you about those otherkin weirdos you hear about is that sometimes there are people that like. cant control it.#its not something they do for fun or because they like the community #its just. inherent. something they were born with. it wasnt influenced in me by anything ive been like this since i was a toddler #they just have words to describe it now #its annoying. it impacts my daily life. i cant help it. it embarrasses me. it makes me look like a fucking weirdo and i cant change that #make all the jokes you want about the ''on all levels except physical i am a wolf'' guy #its not like we CHOSE to be this way #it makes your life a million times harder like any other mental illness

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dhampir-dyke · 2 years ago

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healthcare hero momence (:

Tw medical shit in tags

#if i get yelled at by one more methhead ill die #no maam you cannot drink water or order takeout you got methed up and blew a hole in your face with birdshot #no matter how many times or how many ways i explained it to her it didnt matter. finally she took the water she was using to swab her mouth #with. and water spilled out the holes in her face and throat like a fucking looney tune #it was a miracle she didnt aspirate #and then 5 mjnutes later my other lady with an NG tube rang- it had come unclamped and gastric fluid soaked her/the entire bed/the floor.#and the entire time i was trying to clean it up snd make her bed she was nagging me for going too slow #DO NOT go into healthcare if you dont like people or hate csring for others that a duh #but also. if you're overwhelmingly optimistic and love humans and humanity and community i think you should reconsider the field as well #bc nothing will fuck with your opinions of others quite like healthcare would. you will learn harsh truths whether you like it or not #and either way you're gonna see some horrific shit first hand. even if youre not a first responder youre liable to get a helping of #traumatic experiences + shit that will kindof just destroy your soul #and depending on how low on the totem pole you are #youll prolly get paid minimum wage to deal wit #h the Horrors