#ill just do a handful I guess???? Maybe????

[strwbrychffoncke]

"so go and tell everyone you know that you're all mine, mine, mine, mine, mine,, 2.7k words ⸺ event masterlist synopsis: when your pretty hunter boyfriend receives too much attention ,you decide to take a page from his book contains: nsfw! lnds xavier x afab!reader ,miminal plot tbh ,reader wears a dress ,feelings of jealousy (reader) ,hugging ,kissing ,marking ,you push xav onto the bed ,teasing ,switch!reader ,fellatio ,cum eating ,unprotected sex ,riding ,reader kinda possessive but just kinda ,switch!xav kinda ,creampie ,brief overstimulation ,fluff afterglow ,reassurance ,mention of aftercare ,i think thats it note: (mostly edited!) loosely based on this one twt ab his nightly rendezvous card w an ss ab mc saying she also has a temper & the tweet saying how excited he was at the thought of her getting jealous/doing the same to him that he did in his card.... i hope it came out well...? (og had top!xav in mind but wanted to try smth i dont usually lean into... maybe ill write him another time i <3 when he gets freaky lol)

-

xavier was the jealous type.

that much you knew.

you'd seen the more subtle moves of his possession over you, namely telling others off in a roundabout way or making it know that he was your partner.

other times, his temper escalated, and the night was filled with passion and the reassurance that you were his.

though, you had a temper as well.

and you had just about reached your limit today.

-

xavier sensed that you were... off today, to say the least.

honestly, he could guess why, but he was curious about this side of you, and wanted to see how you got during this time since you were usually the one quelling his feelings.

you're not as chatty on the way back to the apartment, and when you both slip inside of his, door clicking shut behind you, you immediately lean your weight against your partner before you, ear pressed against his chest, cheek squished against the hardness, arms snaking around his middle and holding him tightly in place.

he laughs at the sudden affection, wrapping his own arms around you. at his reaction, he feels you pout against him.

"what's wrong, love?"

you don't respond right away, squeezing him a little bit tighter.

"mine," you mumble against his shirt.

a giggle escapes him again.

ah, so it really did get to you.

on your date earlier, xavier had been approached by some lady when you had left to buy some snacks at a nearby stall. she was chatting him up very enthusiastically, and you couldn't help the feelings stirring within you.

when she asked for his number and he politely declined was when you finally closed the distance, bright smile as you latched onto your boyfriends arm, politely asking who the guest was.

xavier casually began explaining while the girl in question scurried away at the sight of your closeness. you were satisfied at that, at least, dragging him away elsewhere.

though, there were still brief instances of your boyfriend being marveled at by strangers and passerby's alike— much to your chagrin.

you begin sliding your hands up xavier's larger ones, up his arms and across his chest as you kiss at his neck, reveling in the surprised, airy noises he releases into the room, hands reaching forward to grip onto your waist.

in the midst of your kissing and sucking of the pretty skin of his neck, you push at him lightly, signaling him towards his bedroom. xavier follows your lead, excitement growing at your lead.

by the time you get there, you're growing impatient, need steadily growing as you push him back onto the bed, quickly moving to straddle his lap. you don't give him time to question, kissing his lips fervently, hands trailing down and pulling at the hem of his sweatshirt, breaking the kiss to tug it over his head before you're back on him, hands now slipping beneath his shirt to feel up his toned torso.

he moans into the kiss at your touches, wandering hands sending sparks through his sensitive skin, growing harder and harder as you grind against his crotch. he lets you finally tug his shirt over his head, tossing it somewhere before you're leaning up again, kissing him hard and leading him to lay completely on his back, soft fabric of your pretty dress an annoying barrier against his bare chest wanting nothing more than to feel your warm boobs instead, completely at your mercy as you continue grinding your clothed heat against him.

you break the kiss and pull back, looking down at him, satisfied at the state you brought him to, relishing in the way that no one else would have the privilege of doing the same.

"you're so pretty, xav...." you mumble, eyes clouded in need.

xavier's breath hitches as you slide your hands tantalizingly slow down his torso, past his waist until you reach his hips and go a little lower, stopping right before the confined bulge.

your deft hands quickly unbutton and unzip them, pushing them down past his hips, mouth watering at the hard-on pressing through the thin fabric of his grey boxers, small wet patch forming from the leaking head— a show of how much he liked you like this.

he's panting now, anticipating your next move, nerves aflame at your initiative and more than happy to let you do as you please to him— maybe, he thought, he should be a little embarrassed at how turned on he was from this but honestly, he couldn't bring himself to be, not when all he felt was pride that you loved him so much to feel so strongly about him this way.

the same way he felt about you.

he watches as you make brief eye contact with him, head lowering toward his covered cock, watching your tongue dip out and lap at the wet spot of the cloth.

he can't help but moan at the sight, body on fire as he watches you tease him through his boxers for a little longer before he can't take it anymore.

"please, love," he almost begs, wanting nothing more than for you to seat yourself on him and take exactly what you want.

a little grin creeps up your lips and you sit back up, grabbing the hem of his boxers and tugging them down, taking your time and watching as his cock spring to life.

once those are discarded and he's laid bare for you, one hand reaches out to stroke his pretty length, leaning forward and kissing him deeply as you do so.

both of your eyes are fluttered shut and he's humming into the kiss, letting you set the pace, more and more precum leaking from the tip as your speed increases, swallowing his sounds all the while.

you break the kiss suddenly, saliva connecting your lips when you break the string, moving back down and taking the head of his cock between your lips instead, swirling your tongue around the head a few times before slowly fitting more and more of him into your mouth. you gag slightly when you reach your limit, one hand continuing to stroke what you can't fit while the other gives attention to his swollen balls, all while the man below you can't help the moans that are released into the quiet of his apartment.

the wet sounds of his shaft, your sucking, and his moans fill the space, feeling yourself getting wetter by the second. you speed up your ministrations while subconsciously grinding your damp panties against his thigh, knowing he's close and wanting nothing more than to swallow his seed before finally riding his cock.

"love, love, ah- so cl-ose, ah!"

you peek up at xavier's pleasure-filled expression, eyes shut and head thrown back into the pillows, one hand splaying over your head to grip your hair and the other clenched as he tosses it across his mouth, trying his best to muffle the growing volume of his moans at his approaching orgasm.

and with a few more quick strokes and precise sucking he reaches that peak, groaning loud with your name on his lips as his flavor fills your mouth, hips needily bucking against his thigh in need. you continue stroking and squeezing at him, trying your best to swallow all that he gives to you, some inevitably dribbling past your lips as you release the head with a pop, letting the remaining ropes decorate your chin and the lacy fabric of the dress covering your chest.

"always so much," you smile to yourself, always pleased to be marked in his essence.

you're both panting into the air, catching your breath for awhile after. when xavier manages to crack his eyes open, the sight is enough to make him hard again.

you, panting softly, eyes glazed over, sitting on top of him with his cum staining the neckline of your dress and chest, dripping past your wet lips.

god, were you ethereal.

he watches you sit on your knees, reaching under the short skirt of your dress, slowly tugging down your soaked panties, and he can't help the rumble in his chest at the sight of the pretty pearlescent-colored pair practically soaked through— a sign that you were enjoying this just as much as him.

he can't tear his gaze away from you as you position yourself right above him, hand reaching down to stroke at his sensitive cock a couple times, aligning him with your slick entrance.

you look up at his face, giving him a chance to stop or tell you to keep going.

"take what's yours, love."

and with that, you sink yourself down onto his length.

you can never get used to his length no matter how many times you've taken him or had him bully himself into you, a moan ripping from your throat at the first intrusion. you steady yourself, hands flat on his torso and more sounds escaping you as you impale yourself on his cock, bit by bit.

xavier is always aroused by the sight. he can feel himself leaking more, your shared slick dripping down his cock as you continue making your descent.

once you finally take him to the hilt, sitting flat against him, you breathe a sigh of relief, rolling your hips and feeling how full he is within your snug walls. xavier groans at the movement.

"so full, always so full," you mumble almost incoherently, xavier humming in pleasure at the comment.

"it's all for you, love, all for you," and only for you; the underlying message in the sentiment.

satisfied, you begin lifting your hips up enough to keep his head sheathed before slamming back down, a shared sound of pleasure between you both reverberating through the bedroom. in no time, you begin setting a steady pace, hips rising and falling rhythmically, panting out into the air at the pleasure that fills you.

"xavier, hah, feels good," you pant.

"only.. i get to do this... you're mine, ah—"

while your words held promise, xavier couldn't help but think how cute it was of you, saying that while using him like this.

his heart thrums in his chest, hands gripping your waist and pulling you closer towards him.

"all for you, only you, angel," he reassures, relishing in your moans as he makes you grind on his cock before letting you continue bouncing on him.

you arch your back as you bounce, his hands slipping to your thighs and moaning with you, watching as your breasts bounce behind the fabric of your dress.

thats... not right.

lost in the pleasure, you don't fully register the quick motion xavier makes as he grips the hem of your dress, resting at the tops of your thighs, before quickly tugging it over your head and unclipping your bra, tossing them somewhere on the floor as his hands reach up to knead at your bare tits.

you moan is response, hands firmer on his abs at the new stimulation fueling your arousal. you feel your movements ceasing, legs slowly growing tired, but you're determined, wanting nothing more than to feel his warmth invade your insides.

"need some help?"

you let out a surprised moan at the sudden thrust from below— xavier's doing.

"let me help you, angel."

he's gazing at you in that way that leaves no room for argument, his voice darker, a little hushed but with underlying need, and you can't help but to accept his offer.

"please, xavier."

he grips your hips again, planting himself firmly into the mattress before he immediately begins relentlessly thrusting into you from below.

you grip onto his abs tighter, anything to stabilize yourself against his brutal thrusts (how he was able to give such perfect, punctuated thrusts from this position, you had no idea, but no complaints either), moving your hips just enough to meet them, pleased sounds intermingling at the full feeling where you needed him the most.

you throw your head back at one particular thrust, mewling and moaning in response and moving your hips in tandem with xavier's, feeling yourself approaching your high.

"there, xavier! close, hah, im-"

"yeah? feel good, angel? ah-a—"

his thrusts grow sharper somehow, more calculated, one hand moving from your waist down to your clit, playing with the button to increase your pleasure tenfold. you're beginning to see stars, gripping onto him tighter.

"xavi— ah!"

you make me feel so good, angel— only one, hah, who makes me feel this way—"

his words, his thrusts, the stimulation on your clit, the overwhelming sensation of pleasure courses through you, and you lean down to capture his lips with yours in a needy, loving kiss. with a couple more weak plaps against his lap and upwards thrusts from him, you're gushing all over his cock.

"cumming! xavier—"

"m' close, angel, m' close—"

you're laying on top of him as he continues slamming his hips into yours from below, your pretty moans right next to his ear sending even more pleasure through his body.

"too.. much, xavier, too much—"

you're whining in overstimulation against him, tears pricking at your eyes from not being given a chance to come down from your first high before he begins beckoning you into another. one of his hands spreads flat against your back as the other still holds your hip, sinking his teeth into the flesh of your neck as he reaches the peak.

you cry out at the feel of his teeth, arms wrapping around his head and fingers digging into his hair, mewling both at the feeling of his mouth leaving his mark and the warmth that slowly fills you up, the excess remnants of your mixed essence dripping down his spent cock.

you're breathing hard against his ear, hugging him close to your chest for awhile, only letting out pleased hums and small sounds as xavier continues to litter your exposed neck and collarbones in bites and kisses. he can feel your rapidly beating heart like this, smiling against your chest before leaving kisses on the bare mounds.

you pull back after you finally manage to come down, looking into his bright eyes, offering a small smile and leaning forward to kiss him again, this time slow and sweet, full of gratitude and appreciation.

you're the one to break the kiss, cupping his face in your hands and peppering it with kisses all over, prompting the man below to giggle at the sensation.

"so," his hands rub up and down the expanse of your back. "do you feel better, now?"

you tap the corner of your lips with an index finger, feigning a thoughtful expression as you look elsewhere in the room.

"hmmm..."

"because i'm always ready to give you all the reassurance you need, lovely."

his words are sweet, but there's a teasing, almost dark look in his eyes when he shifts his hips just slightly underneath you, causing your body to jolt immediately.

"i'm fine, i'm fine, all better!"

he laughs at your hasty response, arms circling your waist.

"good. if you ever feel that way again, you can do the same thing," his eyes hold mischief before he grows a little serious.

"i'm yours. i always have been."

your heart flutters, and you can't help the urge to kiss him again.

"and i'm yours, always."

"always," he smiles at you.

despite the occasional feelings of jealousy, you both knew that you belonged to the other, forever.

-

epilogue:

"you were so rough with me today," xavier jests, teasing smile playing on his lips.

embarrassed, you can't help to stumble over your words.

"sorry, it was— i just—"

xavier silences you with a peck to your lips.

"its not a bad thing," he reassures, leaning forward so his nose touches yours. "i like when you get that way."

you hum, relaxing against him again.

"though, i'll need a long rest after that," he says, shutting his eyes.

you lightly hit at his chest.

"xavier, we can't just sleep like this!"

"of course we can."

"come on, let's get cleaned up."

when he pretends to doze off under you, you try slowly pulling back to at least clean yourself up, only to be held down by the strong hunter's arms.

"xavier!"

"don't leave me."

"then come with me," you laugh.

he sighs.

eventually, you manage to get him up to take a shower, washing each other off before slipping into some cozy clothes. then, and only then, do you allow him to succumb to sleep, using your chest as a pillow.

you brush your fingers through his hair, planting a fleeting kiss on his forehead.

"all mine," you smile, shutting your own eyes and allowing yourself to drift off.

-

a/n: came out a little differently than i imagined but hope its still ok? havent written for xavier since december so pls be kind.... ill write more for him in the future i promise....

-

[witchexia]

Dr.Arias/Paradox/Pair of Ducks headcanons 2 !

(now that the 1st headcanons were KIND of a backstory for him, it's time for ACTUAL headcanons!!! all of these are in his human form!)

first thing ill start off with is his connection with simon glass! Him and simon are LITERALLY opposites (sun and moon, silver and gold, spring and autumn) ! amazing little detail LOL

simon considers paradox as his inspiration in the whole psychology thing, before simon was head of psychology he wanted to be an amazing psychologist like paradox! (guess it worked out HUH)

He's LITERALLY a fashion icon! carefully plans out his outfits!

and YES, he does repaint his nails on one hand and do his eyelashes on one eye!!! (Slight reference there ;-)

he also REALLY likes snake scale patterns! his belt has a snake scale pattern!

IM SO SORRY FOR CONSTANTLY MENTIONING SIMON WITH HIM BUT, his personality is super similiar to simon's!! he's more calm, professional, maybe even a little serious BUT he's still such a sweetheartttttt !!!!

MUSIC TASTE: 100% a depeche mode/molchat doma guy!!!! maybe even a bjork guy who knows (i cant really figure out his music taste ..)

in his free time, he likes to go on nature walks or when the season is right, he goes to the woods to gather mushrooms! did i mention he knows ALOT about mushrooms and forest stuff?

just like simon, he also keeps snacks in his desk and in a bowl on that desk, has made his office comfy so patients don't feel intimidated and has sedatives in his drawer!

HUUUUUUUUUGEEEEEEEEEEE FAN OF TEA!!!!!! i feel like he also makes 'tea wrappeds' (like spotify wrapped BUT with teas he drank in a year!) i think his favorite teas are: saint john's wort, lavender, rooibos, valerian, chamomile, catnip (pretty much any tea that helps with anxiety, stuff like that!)

forgot to mention that he's also pagan and practices witchcraft! his patients sometimes ask him why does he have a FUCK TON OF CANDLES IN HIS OFFICE, and his excuse is that it calms him and people down!

HE ALSO LOOOOOOVEEEEEEEESSSS INCENSE!!! his favorite scents are: jasmine, sweet frankincense, dragon's blood, lavender, sandalwood, rose, sandalwood!

On halloween, he goes ABSOLUTELY APESHIT!!! he goes to the craft store with simon to get AS MUCH HALLOWEEN DECOR AS THEY CAN! same thing for the equinoxes and solstices!

speaking of halloween, i think he would actually be SO good at sfx horror makeup! like people get HORRIFIED when he makes a sfx fake wound because people think its real!

stealing something that i have irl, but i think he has a protection windchime in his office! (windchime with black colors and protection crystals like black agate or obsidian!!)

[haveihitanerve]

Green Leaves… On A Summer’s Day? …it went by pretty fast…

this play is a train wreck on square wheel and i loved every second of it. you know the drill:

“Its gonna have a beginning, a middle, and quite possibly an end, if we have time.” Big fan of whatever those hand movements were Tom, love it. Also Luke enjoying it, while Aj throws a thumbs up at the audience, lovely :) 

Genre???? Have they done this before or am i tweaking-

“Green leaves on a summers day?” YESSS!!!! YES YES YES!!! The tntl video!!! Luke you icon, yes person in the audience!!!

The audience members cheering because they know is amazing- meanwhile I think Sam might know and is explaining to Luke who is confused?? Maybe he knows, maybe he’s just guessing along… we’ll never know 😔

“This is beautiful-” “for a horror?” Sam is judging. “With like tinges of horro-” “tinges???” Sam is just being a hater today, love to see it lol

Oh he made Tom fully turn around to address him lmaooo 

“It might go *thrusts hand forward* full horror, it might be lightly horror *draws hands back again* i don't know, *frustrated with sam and turns to audience for support while Luke is just watching him with literal hearts for eyes* its fucking improvised.” that got a chuckle from aj and a clap laugh from luke, love it!!!

*genuine lightning* the gods hear you, and they approve boys 🫡

Ok so I had a bingo card going with my friends while watching this premier and evil Luke was on it and I was so teetering on the edge of marking it off right here and now but refrained and im still upset because Luke had so many chances to be evil and decided to be a nice old man ugh 🙄 XD

“I was being careful when coming over the hickory fence.” Luke's slow grin. “I have got a hickory fence. *laughs*” idk why it delights him so that Sam called it that, but loveeee

“Thats right i was a QUARTERBACK!.” Silence. “The one that throws it-” thanks for clarifying Luke XD

“My dad never has time to play with me.” oh no, another sad SFTh child, cant they ever be not traumatized guys????

“Whys that, hes working all the time-?” “Hes dead.” fuck! sam really??? I guess none of them can be happy ok…

“You've been eyeing up my hickory bush?” Luke has the cutest smile, i don't know why this hickory joke delights them so, but its phenomenal

“Thats mama.” FEMALE AJ!!! LETS GOOOO!!!!

“D’you know why?” Luke looks like hes genuinely questioning whether he knows the answer or not. “Because her husband died???” Sam contemplating making this darker or not. “Thats right.” ok so we’re keeping it normal level sad, for now…

why is aj shoeless. why is he without shoes. where are his shoes.  what. 

“From home all- mama..” Aj’s posture and his hands omg- XD

“Hello there old man.” SO AJ does sneak in a few old jokes from time to time, nice, very nice

“why don't you keep it, i don't think ill have much use for it anymore.” sam stop im actually gonna cry-

“My knees really hurt-” now you know how Tom feels playing so many child characters lol

“He wont be.” Line so cold and ominous AJ had to break the fourth wall to laugh with the crowd lmaooo

“I swear i will do terrible things.” I mean i love protective mama aj, gorgeous, but why is he shoeless and also what is his accent lol???

“Im gonna go now but… 👿i hate you.” goodness AJ went into his depths to summon that wow

Tom and sam chatting off stage 😭

Toms arm emerging in the light is terrifying gonna be honest

Tom is slouched so uncomfortably low and is only now equal heights with Luke 😭

“Just the hamptons mildred.” “The hampto-” Tom has never been so insulted in his life- “call me Mother!!”

“I tell you agaaiiiinnnn.” the weird creepy crawling hand up his arm is traumatizing but Luke doesn't even flinch does tom do this often????

“But you're a little baby boy to me.” Little cheek tousle. 

Luke's eyebrow raise of judgment. ‘Really dude? Really??”

“I-” tries to defend himself but no siree, tom will not let that slide. “My little boy boy with a lil baby face.” poor luke XD “cant even grow yourself no little beard-” POOR LUKE XD

“You look me in my good eye now.” sees the joke, has to take it. “Its here in my pocket.” the little hiccupy laugh luke does before covering it, at the same time that Tom lets out a slightly laugh as hes speaking 🫠

“Little st- little little-” *breaks* Tom cant let that slide- “why are you laUUughing?” Tom is also laughing but thats besides the point lmao

“Cause I forgot his name.” dang it! I had AJ forgets a name on my bingo card!!! Not Luke!!! (also im fairly certain Sam is never given a name, so you're good luke)

“You don't get no friends.” why is Tom just bullying him???😭 this feels very personal, but at the same time hes currently performing with three of them so…

I have no clue what Tom is doing with his little stomping and catching of nothing, but it delights me

“Shouldn't be hafta look after you all day.” Thats not grammatically- y'know what its wtv

“AAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhh well if im being a *voice crack* burden! Let me just sit down and die!” I love dramatic mother Tom, yes queen, yes

“Oooh! Here we go! Here i come! Jesus im on my way!!!” Luke is so done lmaoo

“Ready the gates! Ready your gates jes- here i come! Strappin in for death!!” Sam is grinning off stage, glorious. Also Luke is honestly done, hes not even enjoying Tom’s monologue lmaooo

“Cause my little boy says he doesn't wanna care for me no more.” *DRAMATIC last breath* also im fairly certain tom just casually slipped in a short joke, but we love

“You know i cant get past the hickory.” Tom breaking the fourth wall to smirk at the audience. ‘Oh so thats where this story is going, ok!’ lol!

“I plumb forgot!” Luke is already fighting a smile. “*deep voice* you cant go past the hickory fence” makes Luke laugh, sam cackle, and Tom himself fight a smile 😭 cuties

 Tom, knowing it made Luke laugh once, now trying to do it again just to make him laugh, is sooooo fucking cute omg-

Also what are his hand movements what

“These fingers have seen a lot of things.” what does that mean- “but they've never seen you *one finger snaps out* go past the *starts air crawling towards luke* hickory fence.” Tom please put them away thats actually petrifying-

“Hickory dickory dock.” Sam, can see Tom is just spewing nonsense now, ends the scene XD

AJ’s little grab of Luke’s arm as he brushes past to grab a chair 🫠

Luke slipping off stage to stand next to Tom and be out of the scene… cuties

“Look at those green leaves *chuckles lightly* on a summers day!” The audience appreciated the input of the title sam, even if aj didn't 🙂‍↔️

“Did he?” Aj’s nonchalant book flip. “..y-yeah.” Sam confused

Luke’s explosion of laughter and Tom having to turn away from the ridiculousness XD

“The bayou.” AJ’s lips twitch. Sam notices. “*voice changes to try and get him to laugh* the bayou.” theyre so fucking cute

“Jambalaya!” “some- jumbo lion, is that what you said?” AJ i cant- XD

Luke folding with his laugh, while Sam just agrees lmaoo they’ve decided to play along for once instead of being mean XD

“Pppppppwease. Pppppppwease mama.” The way Luke has to cover his mouth in shock- XD

“All you need to know-” Sam forgetting he’s a child being scolded by his mother and slipping back into this is just Aj yelling at me- “WOAH WOAH, lower your FUcKING TONE!!!” DAMN!!!

“Hey!” AJ’s finger almost smacking Sam’s face. Also he totally would have genuinely slapped him had he been at a better angle and i fully believe that lol

Casually beating each other up??? What is going on😭

“How have I changed?” “you lost all your hair.” (hey bald joke was on my bingo lets go!!) AJ’s lips twitch XD

Luke dying in the background and Sam physically has to cover his mouth to keep from laughing- i swear they make so many jokes about it but still every time they laugh like its the first lol

“You used to siiiing!” He really wanted to sneak in an AJ singing bit didn't he lol!! I wish he had succeeded…

“Like a nerd!” Hey! Also atp i think sam is just trying to make aj laugh lol and thats it

“Go to your room!” “Im already in my room!” (your mother reads in your room??) “Then stay in your room!!!” “I WILL stay in my room!” “I HATE YOU!!” “I HATE YOU TOO!” “I HATE YOU!! I WISH YOU’D DIED!!” Woah there- damn

“That may have been too harsh…” Sam waiting for someone, anyone to end the scene and take it away from him lmaoo

Luke and Tom just laughing and ignoring him. “Didn't finish my homework..” Sam dropping the child's voice XD

“I don't want you going near that family-” Aj has had enough of waiting for the scene to end lmaooo

“Woah! Ok-” Sam was genuinely startled and AJ’s little quick grin

“I shouldn't have kneed you in the stomach.” Smiles and glances over at Tom and Luke, who both fold and laugh and lean back together in sync like omg-

“I shouldn't have slapped you in the titties.” “yeah…” “that was weird.” LMAOOO Ya THINK????

Sam making Aj come up with the plot 😭 oh no…

“Can you come into the room? I don't like it when you looom.” XD

“Mama if we just ignore bad things, bad things keep happening.” ok i think we sometimes forget because its mostly funny little dumbass stories but they have like really good quotes and morals and ideas in their skits and you don't always notice because its in the middle of a funny scene but damn if that isn't a cold true line

“Every day. Every day before he tucked me in- *starts laughing, aj breaks lightly* he used to loom over the bed and go: *oh sam is committed now okay* evil triumphs when good men do nothing”

“I've grown so much.” LMAOOO

“Like shaggy and scooby doo!” luke finally ends the scene. Sam: :0 bye!

Side note: AJ joined the live chat and everyone was going crazy saying hi so he went “GUYS FOCUS ON THE EPIC STORYTELLING” anyway thats all, ill try to add in all his comments if i can lol

Luke with the epic stagecraft even tho even he’s not so sure where its going lol

“Stupid old bitch *laughs at his own insult* always hears when i go through the front squeaky door.” XD luke i love you

theres no way hes turning this into one of those old romcoms where hes throwing rocks at the window… Luke that is a child

Sam climbing on a chair was not on my bingo card, i put Tom, dang it

Every single one of them is sooooo good at the weird storytelling that a child does, dancing all over the place, saying everything in one breath, ending it with a question and oversharing and i love it sooo much

“Is there evil things going on over there? Luke: 👀🤷‍♂️ Audience: yes..

Toms snoring noises help- XD

“I cant do that.” “Whyyy.” “Because i physically cant do that.” luke looks so pained that he was the cause of this plot reasoning lmaooo

“Fit as a moose!” “look just- *pause* are mosses particularly fit?” yeah luke they kinda are- also why is he looking off in a different direction than where Sam is, they’re standing next to each other just on opposite sides of a fence lol

“They're the largest natural fauna.” Luke having to short joke himself😭 “well i am not the largest natural fauna.” smile of disappointment and annoyance

Sam casually going on a nerd rant 

“oooOOOOoooooOOoohhh!” “A police car!” Sam once again not letting Tom be the character he wants to be lmaooo

I don't know what kind of demon ritualistic wake up that is, but pop off Tom ok

“Oh my fuck-!” he sounds genuinely concerned lmaooo

Tom being curled backwards and yet still taller than luke 😭

Old lady margaery 2.0????

AJ in the chat: TOM VILLIAN ALERT

“I remember when mooses where the biggest fauna in the world.” love when they throw old jokes back at each other, its delightful XD

The way tom goes behind luke and cradles his waist and luke lets his arms gently sway back to touch him 😭🫠

“Stop being so cryptic what the fuck are you?” Sam really wants to genuinely know for the plot lol

“He had talent for throwing ball.” “He was even better at being a daddy.” Sam im gonna cry-

Tom’s finger wiggles and his shuffle forward are gonna be in my nightmares-

Sam seems actually put off- “i feel like those fingers have seen many things!” oh delightful he throws toms words back too!

“Thats why you had the growth spurt.” oh. Oh oh oh OHHH OH!!!! Damn that was a good plot connection wow

What is tom’s movements???? 😭😭😭

“MAMA! MAMA i've made a horrible mistake! *laughing*” the fear is real XD

“The power of christ does *draws back* nothing to me *strikes a pose*” “ah shit!” 

“Don't you know your daddy’s voice?” Tom making Aj a different character than he intended, lovely, but does help the story better than why sams mom is there all of a sudden lol

“Was that your daddy's voice?” *looks skyward* AJ: *uhhh* Yes.

“Or the offspring to get past us.” Tom, i see what you did there, but unfortunately Sam does not catch on, because like- your son(luke) was technically the quarterback- not linebacker, for the miami dolphins, but it still works because you said “like” and you and luke stole his dad’s talent to be… wait no time wise that doesn't work… tom… sorry man that doesn't make logistical sense, the way all your other plays most definitely do

“Oh you are on board now?” Tom sounds affronted lol

Tom stroking Lukes hair🫠

“You wanna stay with Mama, don't you? Do you wanna stay with your Mama?” holds him😭

“Who would you suckle on?” Audience: *disgust* Tom: *satisfied* Luke: *dissociating* AJ: *walks into frame with purpose*

“Its been a terrible year, mum beats me now.” LMAOOO

Tom: *fingers AJ*ewewewweeewewewewewewewew whatt *slurps aj’s juices????* Audience: *louder disgust*

Sam: no no- Tom: *exasperated* No it makes you younger.” AJ: ah ok! :) 

AJ in chat: EW (im guessing this is in reference to tom eating his juices but i could be wrong idk)

“Thats right. I have achieved my potential.” LMAOOO SAM!!!

Sam: Hey mama. Tom: *turns around* *getting fucking decked* LMAOOOO

“Daddy! We’re the same age!” “oh thats awesome!” *high five* lmao what??? What is even going on???

“Are you still a dolphin?” Luke: *squeals* what is going on😭😭😭

“Daddy do you still love the dolphins?” because thats the important question right now AJ: *attempts to replicate Luke’s sound and fails* ehhh- n-u- yes!

Tom: *even more done* the sports team, the dolphins AJ: *ahhh* oh i love the dolphins! Tom: *my work here is done, returns to his fetal position* Lol he just had to clarify for aj 😭

AJ in chat: LETS GO (i have no idea what this is referencing, maybe his agreement of the dolphins, maybe sam decking tom, i have no clue)

“STOP beating on women!!!” *continues to get beat on* LMAOO

Toms genuine fear as they start to lift him- XD

“NOT SO FAST!!!” “... it went pretty fast.” “it went pretty fast yeah..” XD i love them so much omg

AJ HAVING TO PLAY TWO CHARACTERS IS EVERYTHING TO ME

“Daddy its so good-” *notices how Aj has to play two characters* “you have your scene :)” ASS!!! XD

Sam not even bothering to act and just watching AJ with a grin

“They've been feeding on my juices.” *surprisingly no sounds of audience disgust* “i've been thinking about your juices” *accent change, still no audience disgust noises, although one slightly quailed “no!”*

“No we are here-” *Tom’s hand appears as a replacement, catches AJ off guard and makes him laugh* oh i know how this ends and i cannot wait

(btw on my bingo card the scene was viewed by me and my friends as “sexual tension with a tree” but y'know im not even mad that this was the turnout)

AJ in chat: things are about to get weird if i remember correctly

“Im gonna give you the most passionate kiss.” *Toms hand: *Shaking encouragingly in a nod**

Tom’s grin slowly fading to disgust as he looks away while AJ makes out with his hand lmaooo

AJ having to pause to laugh and wipe his mouth XD

“Open your mouth baby!” yesss!! Clever aj, clever lmaooo

AJ dipping Tom’s arm- excuse me while i faint omg-

AJ coming up for air before switching positions- poor Tom XD

AJ dipping himself and the way Tom immediately jumps to stabilize him 😭my heart-

AJ in chat: yep i remember correctly LMAOO

Also- im so sorry Luke and Sam, but i have no idea what you guys have been saying and probably wont know until the end of the play either because aj and tom are captivating-

Tom’s hand giving Aj head…

Ajs helpless grin as he puts his hands behind his head

Whoever the woman is in the crowd who screamed i love you

Luke and Sam trying so hard to focus, but both just watching AJ and Tom instead

The way Tom and AJ are making eye contact while Tom is miming being Aj’s wife who is also him giving him head 

Aj kneeling and losing it, Tom’s disappointed head drop as they both just die 

Luke having given up and just slouched, tongue in his cheek as he grins watching them😭- as sam tries desperately to end the scene XD

Tom and Sam both lunging to call SCENE

Tom’s supportive hand on Aj’s back while Sam just stands above him, hands on his hips, waiting for him to look up so he can see the disappointment XD

And luke just laughing :) 

AND SCENE

WOW. and i mean WOW. that was incredible. Watched this live with a friend and we lost our mindssss

Absolutely incredible. Loved it so so so so sooooo much. Amazing. Spectacular. I need a dictionary and a thesaurus to properly convey how much i enjoyed that. 

Anyway hope you found it as entertaining as I did

Side note, checked the comments: Aj here. I've only just noticed how long it took Luke and Sam to get out "nothing more beautiful than green leaves.." cause we were having too much fun on the side of the stage hahaaaa

God i love them. Anyway, this was a riot. Enjoy :) 

@snek-of-eden @dawn-speckled

[pinata-candy]

Blows my little lore kazoo <33 Here’s my star hc family tree and silly star forms of everyone! Plus the original chart from 2019 when I first had this stupid idea for them all to be related which has since just. Dominated my personal star lore. It was supposed to be a fun au idea and then it got out of control the drama was just too much fun <33 More details under the cut about everyone!

- So first I gotta talk about dark stars real quick, in my lore they are a species of star and not just one guy

- Darkstars can not have parents, they are created from the shadow of millennium stars

- essentially what happens is when a millennium star is born, a Darkstar is created in its shadow to help maintain balance between light and dark forces of the universe. They are as pure light magic and as pure dark magic as any stars can possibly get.

- The Darkstar who begins the whole family tree IS the dark star from Bowsers inside story, his real name is Aludra. The Millennium star who he was created with is Prankstar, his real name is Capella

-THEY ARE NOT RELATED. I just wanna say that hear the deal with dark and millennium stars is less like a ‘these beings are twins’ thing and more like a ‘you are cosmically tied to this being by the strings of fate’ deal

-Without getting into Aludra and Capella’s complicated lore and more into the messed up lore of the history of dark and millennium stars, TLDR: Aludra was the star’s leader and Capella was his jester. They were in a secret relationship while Aludra was married to another star (the marriage had been arranged by the council)

- Aludra and his wife have 3 biological kids: Boomer (yes, the boss from mario rpg), Eldstar, and Smithy

- side note: star children are not made through. Yknow. They are made through a magic wishing ritual it is very easy and you don’t even have to see the other parent for it to happen. Also Eldstar and Smithy, those are not their birth names, they are titles earned later on, lots of higher stars have them

-Aludra also raises the next darkstar born, her name is Umbriel and Capella raises her corresponding millennium star, his name is Vesper. They are largely unimportant rn but just. That’s who they are

-Aludra is sealed away, his children fight for the throne, the Eldstar wins

-He then gets married to Mamar and has his four sons: Skolar, Kalmar, Muskular, and Klevar (again, I promise those are titles not their birth names)

-Lady Misstar wanted in on the high life and so started pretty much dating all of his sons at once, girl wanted the benefits of dating what are essentially star princes, good for her

-Fuck around and find out though, she has Twink pretty much on accident

-Star law says that stars are not allowed to have children with one another unless they’re married (a law made by Aludra to try and stop the overpopulation problem). but Klevar does not want to marry her

- so she does what any gaslight gatekeep girlboss would do, she lies to the stupidest of the children and says it’s his and she marries Muskular instead.

- he’s just happy to have a kid, he knows that ain’t his boy but he’s happy :]

-Twink is sent down to Starborn valley for his younger years just like any other star, no special treatment for him

-BACK TO THE SMITHY SIDE OF THINGS and oh this is where it gets complicated and ridiculous truly

- after his brother takes the throne, Smithy goes to him and has the idea of making vessels for stars, big metal bodies to keep everyone safe as stars are vulnerable little things. I mean just look at them

-Eldstar approves and they make the factory

- at first the factory is filled with volunteer stars who want to help but as progress is slow, they leave, Smithy is spiraling into madness

- well the factory needs workers, Eldstar starts letting his brother use children to work there

- Smithy has hundreds of kids with hundreds of other stars, he also takes orphaned stars to work the factory. Most die.

-They also serve as the star’s army, conquering more land and defending the haven

-He also forces his brother Boomer and his son to help him. Boomer’s son, Punchinello, would eventually flee the factory and hide on earth, settling in there

- Geno is one of his kids, he’s part of the latest and last group of kids. He’s towards the middle of the group

-Geno also flees the factory after realizing his father is out of his mind. He flees in one of his father’s wooden prototypes and dumps it on earth before hiding in space

-The Eldstar eventually finally realizes this has gone too far and tells Smithy to shut down the factory program, which Smithy retaliates by destroying the star road

-SMRPG happens. Smithy and his kids go to jail, they were bad

-at this point in personal lore/lore with my buddy, they are out of jail and the kids are all living together and patching things up

-there is also another darkstar, that’s Nebula, poor Yarid has been raising the damned thing

-also Yarid’s boyfriend. Yeah, we made him up sort of on accident. We had a list of canon characters. And we were gonna give him a boyfriend from those. Then we made Misha on accident and their interactions were nice so he got the role instead. Twas an fun surprise

-I think that’s mostly everything other than talking about Estelle, Castor, and Constella

-but essentially they were told by the higher stars. Oh hey, do you want a kid? We’ll let you have one without getting married, just for you because you are so special but don’t tell anyone they’ll get jealous :)) and then took their kids and put them in the factory

- also yes, all five of the axems were born at the same time, it was a terrible surprise. Their father had a meltdown. And they really did just name them each a color

-Also Trickstar is not on the star chart bc his title is a lie he is a comet not a star

-I THINK THATS EVERYTHING. HOPEFULLY

[puppppppppy]

act 4 :(

@chipper-smol and i came to a realization

[mikkolas]

every saturday passes me by and i think maybe i should post those fun little textposts that i enjoy making because they make me laugh. and then i don't. this has been in my drafts since late october. all i had to do was tag. and yet. and yet, | spotify wrapped sucked this year and it made me remember youtube rewind's existence somehow. anyone remember her? she was great. anyway, if you also want to go back in time, click here!

[sorunort]

(You are bound to the Universe's will the same way the moon is bound to this planet, the same way the planet is bound to the sun, the same way a puppet is bound it's strings!!!!!!)

top ten pieces of dialogue ive screencapped because of how normal it is and how normal it made me feel

[bisexualcherdegre]

D:BH Rarepairsweek 7 | @dbhrarepairs

Day 4 - Kara/Luther

[a-lonely-dunedain]

my problem rn is that I really like the idea of putting Ethedis in a sickfic scenario right? love the designated healer character getting forced downtime and being tenderly cared for for a change. that's the good stuff. BUT, dangit Tolkien, apparently elves can't even get sick >:( so I guess the only way to knock her into forced downtime is to use the good ol plinko and stab her a bunch or something. the lore forced me into this you see, there was simply no other way.

[girlivealwaysbean]

it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[spaciebabie]

does any other demiromantic (or arosepc doesnt rlly matter) feel like. extremely awful when they experience romantic attraction or is that just me.

[marurumai]

hi uhm lmanburg tommy from ctubbo pov hahahdjdjdhd im going insane

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Hi. New ✨Pinned Post✨

• MINORS. DO NOT MESSAGE ME. NO DMS. NO INBOX MESSAGES. NO. I am not checking my activity and Every note to see if minors are interacting w my stuff but i WILL check if u directly try to contact me. I WILL block you. Please dont do that to me 😭 Likes/Reblogs are fine, just dont talk to me Directly please.

• This blog will have ns//fw stuff! Suggestive and Explicit! Please block [spicy hot], [suggestive] and [saucy] to avoid seeing these posts! Make sure to remove the brackets! (Gonna be changing [spicy hot] to [saucy] very soon so I am adding that in there as well)

• No, I do not want you to dub any of my art. Oh my god. Oh my god ! I cannot stop you but I do not want anything ive done dubbed and placed anywhere on the internet. Do not show me if u do this. Do not show me if u saw it on youtube or tiktok or whatever! I am existing with Blinders on and i would prefer to keep it that way!

• I dont rp! Please do not send me rp asks and dms ! I will NOT respond to them!

• Not important but if u see Dissociativekitten in ur activity, thats me :)

OKAY thats it for real bye

[dzozef]

ive decided that my newest hobby is mixology this is who i am now

[puppppppppy]

axolotl