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#if you know one
desperatepleasures · 17 days
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one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.
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froody · 4 months
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“can straight men be romantically and sexually attracted to men?” sure, I’m not a cop
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 6 months
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Knowledge Revenge.
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bonesandthebees · 6 months
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one of the most infuriating things about becoming an adult is when you realize that it actually is 10x easier to solve problems by making a phone call vs literally any other communication method
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butchfalin · 10 months
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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swan2swan · 3 months
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Whoever conceived and animated this moment, I hope they're doing well and thriving. This is S-rank romance stuff here.
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sylvies-kablooie · 8 months
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i do unironically think the best artists of our generation are posting to get 20 notes and 3 reblogs btw. that fanfic with like 45 kudos is some of the best stuff ever written. those OCs you carry around have some of the richest backstories and worldbuilding someone has ever seen. please do not think that reaching only a few people when you post means your art isn't worth celebrating.
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thelaurenshippen · 4 months
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watching bridgerton and obviously there were a lot of things wrong with the way socializing has worked in the past, but honestly the idea of a "calling hour" is so appealing. office hours for friendship. you can show up unannounced at my home between 1 and 3pm. you must leave by 3pm. I may give you a pastry. lets bring that back
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the-nefarious-vampire · 7 months
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as an aroace, im particularly dangerous, because i wont fuck or marry. i only know how to kill.
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tuttle-did-it · 3 months
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David Tennant for Prime Minister, please.
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edit- Since this is getting so much attention, edited to include descriptions of screenshots.
This woman has lost her fucking mind.
Jo, are you okay?
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hoofpeet · 3 months
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14 year old artists listen to me right now (gripping you by the shoulders) STOP caring about your "internet presence" right naow. Draw slower and stop trying to boil your art down to an acceptable marketable brand
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 6 months
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The math just adds up!
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Do you know this queer character?
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Castiel is Queer and Agender or Genderfluid, and uses varying pronouns based on presentation!
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jellys-compendium · 2 months
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Imagine Nanami Kento waking up from anesthesia after surgery, his bleary and unfocused gaze landing on you (his wife) standing beside him and holding his hand in yours. You smile at him warmly, softly reassuring him that he's okay and that you're right here beside him as he stares at you silently.
Nanami looks down at your joined hands, his gaze seems to focus on the wedding band adorning his ring finger. He stares at it for a moment before looking back up at you.
"Who are you?" He slurs, his words sloshy and imprecise. So unlike him, and so very adorable. "Are you a nurse?"
You giggle at Nanami's question.
"No, I'm not a nurse."
Nanami seems puzzled at your response. His brows furrow as his fingers move against yours, thumb stroking across your knuckles in that gentle motion he always does to soothe you. Your smile widens. Looks like there are some things that even ketamine can't erase.
"Wow. You got the most gorgeous smile. Are you a model? You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my whole life. You got really pretty teeth too..."
Kento's fingers tighten around yours, his voice falling into a groggy whisper.
"But...I think I'm married. We shouldn't be holding hands like this."
You bite your lip, fighting against the bubbling laughter in your throat and failing.
"O-Oh?"
Nanami nods, his expression shifting from one of appreciative awe to adorable seriousness.
"I want to be a good husband."
Well that just about melted your whole damn heart. Even the hospital staff in the background can't repress their "awww"s and "that's a keeper"s.
"Don't worry, you are a wonderful husband, Kento. I know that for sure."
He's confused again, those unfocused honey brown's searching yours, trying to figure out the situation as best as he can given the circumstances.
"How do you know?"
You raise your left hand, bringing it into his line of sight and wiggle your ring finger, the golden band surrounding it captures Nanami's attention in an instant.
"Because I'm your wife."
Nanami's eyes instantly grow wide, his expression morphing into one of childlike wonder.
"You're my wife?"
You laugh.
"Yes."
He squeezes your hand with a surprising amount of strength given that he was knocked out cold not that long ago.
"We're really married?"
"Yes."
"Wow..." Kento breathes, drifting off for a moment before asking you another question. "Have we kissed yet?"
His innocent yet hilarious question sends you into another fit of laugher.
"Y-yes! Many times."
Nanami rewards you with a dopey smile, his gaze so utterly loving, enchanted by your unrestrained joy.
"My wife." He murmurs adoringly, his fingers reaching up to caress your cheek.
"I love hearing you laugh." His palm cups your face. "You really are so beautiful. I hit the jackpot, didn't I?"
Grinning from ear to ear, you press a tender kiss to Kento's fingertips before guiding his hand back down to the bed.
"Alright sweetest man alive, you need to stop talking before you make every person in this room fall in love with you. I'm going to grab a snack for us for later. I'll be right back, okay?"
Kento nods.
"Okay. Can I get another kiss when you come back?"
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bereft-of-frogs · 5 months
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There’s that post that’s like ‘everyone should get into a tiny niche fandom at least once’ fully agree, that was really fun -- but I would like to add that everyone should get into a fandom where their opinions run counter to major fanon because it really teaches you about sticking to your guns and trusting your interpretation of the text without having to rely on peer validation
because WHAT are people talking about sometimes
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transannabeth · 6 months
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if you opened discord’s april fools day loot boxes how long did it take you to get all the items? it took my friend 18 boxes but me 65 and i want to see how bad my luck is
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