the-nefarious-vampire

[the-nefarious-vampire]

in case you're wondering what the greatest AMV of all time is, it's this one from 2008.

[the-nefarious-vampire]

idk who needs to hear this but if you have been putting something off bc it doesn't need to be done until the end of the month. we are almost done with the teens we are approaching the big numbers (the twenties). that date shall dawn upon you swiftly and without mercy before you know it. psa for everyone except me i got plany off time

[the-nefarious-vampire]

harry dubois would end death note in one episode. he'd be unkillable bc he has no fucking idea what his name is and then he'd go drink driving and accidentally run light over and the killings would mysteriously stop

[the-nefarious-vampire]

hey man, you’ve been looking really glum ever since we reversed the genderbend curse that that wizard hit you with. is there something you wanna tell us?

[the-nefarious-vampire]

news is looking pretty good lately

[the-nefarious-vampire]

assigned scared at birth

[the-nefarious-vampire]

died and came back exactly the same but something was so so so wrong with me before and now I have an excuse to really lean into it

[the-nefarious-vampire]

Those "Is a gyro a sandwitch? Well what about a tortellini?" conversations always get annoying because people don't know how to keep them going. Casual taxonomical pedantry is fun and righteous, but only if people know how to play. "Is an onion a sandwich? What about a glass of water?" Obviously not. Be serious.

Lemme tell you how to upgrade your game:

"What is the least-sandwich sandwich? What defines the outermost realm of sandwitchdom?"

"What analytical razors can we use to separate sandwiches from non-sandwiches?"

"What food is most like a sandwich while not being a sandwich?"

"What is the most sandwitch sandwitch?"

"What was the first sandwich? What does the ur-sandwitch tell us about the nature of sandwitchdom?"

"Can you process a sandwich until it is no longer a sandwich? At what point does it lose its sandwich-ness?"

"When does a non-sandwich become a sandwich? i.e. When do the ingredients become a sandwich?"

"What is the simplest possible sandwich?"

"What is the most complex possible sandwich? Is there an upper limit on sandwich complexity?"

[the-nefarious-vampire]

hi, ummm. this is awkward. haha. yeah um do you think you could push your boulder up somewhere else? like a different hill? because this one’s kind of already taken. yeah it’s the one i’ve decided to die on, so.

[the-nefarious-vampire]

[the-nefarious-vampire]

[the-nefarious-vampire]

Every year I try to celebrate my birthday in normal circumstances, but this year is different... Today I complete 15 years of life, but a life filled with killing, destruction, hunger, and loss and sick . This year was the hardest, I lost everything... my dreams, my hopes, and even my sense of security.

I appeal to you today, not only for myself, but for my family and everyone suffering in Gaza. We are now at 19,070 euros, and we only need to cross the 20,000 barrier tonight. I know that there are those who could help but did not, and I say to them: mercy is not just a feeling; it is an action.

Help me to live, donate and be the reason for changing our lives for the better.

@punkitt-is-here @tamamita @skunkes @omegaversereloaded @serial-unaliver @komsomolka @sawasawako @joshpeck @teaboot @prisonhannibal @halorvic @caats @only-cat-memes @ot3 @batmanisagatewaydrug @serial-unaliver @wolfertinger666 @anneemay @afro-elf @annabelle--cane @taffybuns @bevsi

[the-nefarious-vampire]

How well do you see color?

I’m cry I scored 60, I feel blind

[the-nefarious-vampire]

my mum just called "scrolling on Tumblr" "scrumbling"

[the-nefarious-vampire]

Fun fact: in the 80′s the Dutch Unemployed Union held ‘fridge raids’ to protest against poverty. 

They’d find out when a politician of big boss who upheld poverty and starvation wages was speaking at some public even, then they’d carefully break into his house with a LOT of people and they would eat EVERY piece of food in his house and leave the empty dished behind without taking anything else. 

[the-nefarious-vampire]

second knuckles LOVE randomly getting painlessly sliced open when you're not looking. it's their favourite thing to do.

[the-nefarious-vampire]

PSA: tomatoes are not spicy. Tomatoes and tomato products should not be spicy. Pizza sauce isn’t inherently spicy. Tomato-based pasta sauce is not spicy. Ketchup is NOT spicy.

If tomatoes are spicy, you have an allergy to tomatoes.

This announcement brought to you by my almost 29-year-old husband learning for the first time in his 2.8 decades of putting food products into his mouth that spaghetti and saucy pizza aren’t spicy foods