#if you ever want to see my ‘other’ HP just DM me

[lethality-of-dual-strike]

I LIVE to serve fellow pixie appreciators

I drew pinups up the mf last night I need to be publicly executed

[forjongseong]

pine-fresh // jay (ENHYPEN)

pairing: slytherin!jay x gryffindor!fem!reader

genre: hogwarts!au, somewhat rivals to lovers, smut (minors dni)

warning: profanity, a lot of making out, fingering // word count: ~4k

summary: a dash of bickering and a whole lot of miscommunication in Potions class landed you and Slytherin's Park Jongseong in detention. did you ask for it? no. did you regret it? also, no.

author's note: at last, the Slytherin!Jay of my imagination has now, sort of, come to life...

ever since I came across that edit you see on the header, I've thought about him A LOT. now that his hair is actually silver, I have thought about him MORE. especially when @jaylaxies made this, which I thought about ALSO a lot... let's just say that Slytherin!Jay has been occupying my mind a lot more than I expected.

my knowledge on the HP universe is quite limited, so please excuse if some scenes don't seem too believable (like Snape somewhat being less strict here, or detention being scrubbing the bathroom). the title of this fic refers to the password that is needed to enter the Prefects' bathroom.

now, I know I say when I post oneshots I intend for them to be standalone fics, meaning that I most likely won't write a part two. but for this one??? if a lot of you like it, and a lot of you ask for it, I might be open to writing a sequel (once I conduct a lengthy research on Hogwarts grounds)

anyway, I hope you enjoy this little treat! I'm trying to shake off my writer's block, so please expect secretary!Jay to return soon.

taglist: @jaylaxies @excusememissiloveyou @thots4hee @end-hyphen @nyanggk @maggstar @bucketofhiros @shinkenprincess-oh @mydarlingjay @mochimchimo @jongseonglogy @strawberrification12 @xiaoderrrr

permanent taglist is open! send an ask or DM if you want to be tagged.

As your House’s Prefect and one of the smartest students at school, you thought it would be impossible to dislike a class. Getting good grades in almost every subject seemed to prove that you liked learning everything, but by God, you hated Potions. Other than the fact that the lessons took place in a literal dungeon, which made it colder than any of the classrooms above, you always had to deal with the unpleasant smell of whatever was brewing in the room. Add the inconvenient detail that half of the class consisted of Slytherin students, which was more than you could tolerate.

You did not know when it started, maybe since the Sorting Hat placed you in Gryffindor or when you witnessed one of your classmates getting teased by a Slytherin, but you had a strong aversion to anything related to that house. It became so bad to the point that whenever you got paired with a Slytherin for an assignment, all you wanted to do was to get the job done quickly for the both of you so you could leave the class as soon as possible.

“Miss L/N,” called Professor Snape. Your head snapped up and you locked eyes with him, somehow convincing him that you had been listening to all his instructions despite staring into the empty vials on your table. “Today you’ll be working with Park Jongseong.”

You nodded softly and once Snape turned his head towards another student, you made an audible groan and leaned back on your chair.

“You don’t sound so happy to be paired with me.”

Jay took the now unoccupied seat beside you and sat with a force that made his robe flutter. The flash of green caught your eye, and you hesitantly pulled your books to your side, making room for his on the table.

“I’ll handle the mixing,” you replied, completely unrelated to his remark.

Jay frowned before letting out a soft chuckle. “Wow, I guess you really aren’t in the mood today.”

You turned your head only slightly enough to shoot daggers at him with your eyes, and his response was just a huff to his face, messing up the silver bangs on his forehead. The sound of Professor Snape’s voice caught your attention, so you straightened up and listened intently, but also noticed how Jay was mimicking you. Once you were all instructed to begin, Jay grabbed his quill and started making notes for the recipe.

For the first couple of minutes, the process went well. You were mixing and adding stuff according to Jay’s dictation. However, after he misread the measurements for a certain ingredient, causing your brew to bubble uncontrollably, you began scolding him and blaming him for everything.

“What’s distracting you? How could you have misread that?” You half-shouted, a handkerchief in your hand as you attempted to clean up your surroundings.

“Maybe if you weren’t shaking so much when you’re holding the vials then I could have paid more attention,” Jay retorted, snatching a vial from your other hand to prevent more spills. “We should switch. You tell me what to do and I’ll redo everything.”

“That will take us even longer, and everyone else is already halfway done,” you complained as you looked around the class. You saw Professor Snape eyeing your table.

“Do you have another solution?” Jay asked, staring back at you.

You reluctantly agreed to switch tasks, but it turned out that Jay was worse than you. He kept spilling liquid, pouring more than needed, and overall causing more chaos than when he was just giving you instructions. Your grunts and groans were starting to gain the attention of the whole classroom, and by the time you were almost done, the bell rang.

The sound of your quill hitting your book was silenced by the footsteps of the other students exiting the classroom. They had finished their potions, and your table was literally the only one in the room that was still messy, with a mixture that looked too suspicious to be called a potion.

“I have been patient enough to let you two bicker the whole time, but for you to not finish making your potions,” Professor Snape said as he walked back to his desk, his cape almost floating behind him.

“Great, he’s gonna put us in detention,” you muttered to yourself.

“That is correct, Miss L/N,” Professor Snape continued. “Once you’re both done cleaning up your table, meet me in my office.”

The frown you wore on your face was so bad that anybody who saw you could easily tell that you were pissed, but between gathering the books and papers and wiping off spills with a cloth, you could have sworn you saw Jay smirking to himself.

---

As you placed a bucket of water in the middle of the Prefects’ bathroom, you sighed at the exhaustion that you felt despite not having even started your detention. You and Jay were both assigned to clean up the bathroom, which, despite only being restricted to use by the school Prefects, Head Boys, Head Girls, and Quidditch captains, was in an alarmingly grimy state.

You purposefully steered away from the side of the room with the toilet stalls and stood by the large, swimming pool-like tub sunken into the ground with bath taps surrounding it. The tub was drained, and you much preferred scrubbing it to cleaning all the toilets.

Jay was standing by the bath supplies on one side of the pool, staring at the different kinds of soap, bath oils, bath salts, shampoo, and conditioner. It took a while for him to realize you were glaring at him, basically waiting for him to start working already.

“Damn, it would be worth becoming a Prefect just to be able to use this bathroom,” Jay muttered, placing a small bottle of bath oil back in its place. “You must take baths all the time.”

You snorted, audible enough to make it echo throughout the whole room. “I don’t have time for baths.”

“Really? What a shame,” Jay sighed, rolling up his sleeves. “How long do you think it would take for us to finish?”

“If you keep using your mouth instead of your hands, probably a lot longer than I expect,” you replied without a pause, sounding annoyed.

Your snarky remarks did not bother Jay at all. In fact, it amused him, and the way he was laughing softly was not helping at all. He walked over to the stalls and finally began to work only minutes after you started.

“Today is really not your day, huh?” Jay’s voice echoed behind the stalls.

“Thanks to you, it’s not,” you answered, polishing one of the hundred golden bath taps that surrounded the tub.

“You know,” Jay started, only to pause to flush the toilet so he wouldn’t have to compete with the sound. “I have a feeling that you don’t like me.”

You rolled your eyes and moved your bucket to polish the other bath taps. Jay cleared his throat as he waited for your reply.

“Is it because I’m a Slytherin?” He asked. “I mean, it’s kinda unfair that just because I’m in this House, you automatically hate me—”

“I don’t hate you,” you finally responded. “Hate is a strong word.”

“Alright then,” Jay walked out of one stall and looked in your direction before entering the next stall. “So, what’s the story?”

You let out a heavy sigh and wrung out the cloth you were holding. It was a long story, you thought to yourself. You came from a family of Slytherins—both your parents and your older brother were—but since you were old enough to understand and remember things, you had always been the odd one out in your family. They would excel academically and go on to achieve things you never even dreamed of. Your interests were always different, and what got you far at school was thanks to your personality and smart work.

It was still a vivid memory to you, the moment you sat down and let the Sorting Hat analyze you. You thought you would hear a confident ‘Slytherin!’ from the Hat, but after a couple of seconds of deciding, it placed you in Gryffindor. Switching houses was never a thing, so you did what you could and made good friends, studied hard enough to make the professors notice you, and eventually, you earned the title of Prefect as you entered the fifth year.

Despite that, throughout the years in Hogwarts, you kept hearing and witnessing stories about Slytherins, how they always happen to achieve so much but at the same time are notoriously problematic. The house you once dreamed of being a part of quickly became one that you were relieved to be excluded from, but somehow, the longing remains.

Around your third year in Hogwarts, you began hearing chatter about Park Jongseong. He became popular, it seemed, after he was assigned to be the Keeper of Slytherin’s Quidditch team, and also after he had an insane glow-up. You then noticed that he was the quiet nerd who used to bury his nose in whatever book he was reading in a dark corner in the library, but since then, he had ditched his glasses and styled his luscious silver locks in a way that—

“Y/N, are you okay?”

Jay’s voice woke you up from your extensive daydreaming, and it made you realize you were polishing one bath tap for way too long.

“How long were you polishing that tap?” Jay asked, tilting his chin towards your hand.

His question spooked you, and you were beginning to think he might have heard your thoughts. You cleared your throat before moving to the next tap. “Not long, why?”

“Because I’m done with all the toilet stalls, and I noticed you haven’t moved an inch.”

Well, that’s embarrassing, you thought. How long exactly did you zone out for?

“Should I start cleaning the pool’s floor then?” He asked, fixing his folded sleeves before squatting down and then jumping into the empty pool.

“Sure,” you said, immediately picking up your pace and trying your best not to steal any more glances in his direction.

“Listen,” Jay began, both his hands firmly holding a mop. “You got really silent after I asked a question, so I’m sorry that I made you uncomfortable. We can continue to work in silence if that’s what you prefer.”

You smiled as you moved on to the next tap. “It’s fine. I was just tired.”

You refocused on your own task, determined to leave the bathroom spotless, but after a moment, you noticed Jay moving oddly around the pool floor, dragging his mop in a way that was not normal. When you lifted your head to look at him, you saw that he was singing, no, lip-syncing a song and using the mop as a mic stand, completely immersed in his imagination but being considerate not to bother you with noise.

At this sight, you burst out laughing. Jay stood up straight and turned his heel to face you, looking surprised.

“Please,” you said after you contained yourself, “do continue.”

“Miss Prefect,” Jay sighed, “this bathroom is way too huge for only two of us to clean. Do you think we can sneak out and get our wands from Snape’s office?”

You shook your head. “The door is locked with a password.”

“But you’re Miss Prefect,” Jay said, matter-of-factly. “Don’t you know the password?”

“He literally changed it after leaving us here with these cleaning supplies, Jay. I don’t know the new password.”

Jay paused and for a moment you thought he was figuring out a way to escape, when in reality, his stomach just did a backflip from the way his name rolled off your tongue.

“So, what you’re saying is there is literally no way to get out of this bathroom unless we finish cleaning it?” Jay asked.

“That is the point of detention, yes,” you replied, shrugging.

Jay groaned and turned around, pushing his mop and reluctantly continuing to clean the pool floor. You were almost halfway done with polishing all the bath taps, and you sighed as you looked at all the mirrors waiting to be scrubbed clean too.

After a while, Jay finished scrubbing the floors, and you began to wonder if you should have taken his work instead since the bath taps seemed like a never-ending task to complete. He loosened the tie around his neck and undid the first few buttons on his shirt, making you quickly look away.

“Should I help you with the bath taps or start doing the mirrors?” Jay walked over to your side before pushing himself up the edge and then standing up, towering over you.

“Mirrors, please,” you answered, this time tilting your chin to point at the direction of the sinks.

“Really? Because you seem like you’re taking your sweet time polishing all those taps,” Jay said, tilting his head to one side.

You looked up at him and he had this teasing, lop-sided smirk. Meanwhile, the unintentional doe eyes you were giving him made him almost choke on his own saliva.

“Just do the mirrors, Jay.”

You saw him smile the second you finished your sentence, and when he turned his back to you, it somehow looked like his shoulders were happy. He stood in front of the sink and did a quick count on the number of mirrors he had to clean. You saw him start from the far left, where one of the mirrors was cracked on the edge.

“Be careful with that one. Ravenclaw’s Head Girl almost—”

“Fuck!”

You heard Jay groan as he stumbled a few steps back, wincing in pain and shaking his left hand.

“Jay,” you sighed, standing up and throwing the cloth you were holding to the floor. “I didn’t even finish my sentence.”

You walked up to him and stood before him with your hand out. He looked at you questionably before lifting his left hand for you to take a look.

“Is it bad?” He asked, slightly looking away. “I don’t like the sight of blood.”

“That explains a lot,” you muttered, placing your hand carefully over his. “Oh, my God.”

“What? What is it?” Jay asked, his right hand shaking in panic.

“Your fingers are so thick and stubby, like cocktail sausages.”

Jay snorted before pulling his hand away and you giggled.

“It’s just a scratch,” you said in an attempt to calm him down. “You can carry on.”

“Well, do you have something I can use to treat it?” Jay asked.

You were already sitting by the edge of the pool to continue with your polishing. “Do I look like a walking first aid kit to you? Just spit on it and move on.”

Jay looked at you, unsure of your advice. He then turned around and decided to wash his hands with soap. The suds obviously stung, so he was flinching and wincing quietly, but he could see you giggling silently from your reflection in the mirror in front of him.

“Do you really mean it?” Jay spoke, looking at you through the mirror.

“Mean what?”

“That I have stubby fingers,” Jay clarified.

You were unsure what to make of his tone. He sounded curious but also hurt, or maybe…

“So what if you do?” You asked back, not paying attention to him.

The strands of your hair were becoming loose and covering your eyes, and you were dying to fix the scrunchie on your ponytail, but both your hands were wet and occupied with polishing. You kept huffing and puffing and even attempting to move your hair using the movements of your shoulders until Jay sneaked up behind you and tapped you on your arm.

“Here, allow me,” Jay said calmly, tugging on your scrunchie.

You sat up straight and let him pull your scrunchie off, letting your hair cascade to your back. He began brushing your hair with his fingers before gently bunching it into a ponytail. He skillfully tied your hair up into a bun that was less messy than before. You were about to thank him, but he moved from behind you and jumped back into the empty pool, standing in front of you and tucking the loose strands of hair behind both your ears.

His fingers brushed against your ear, and for a moment, you were lost in his eyes. The next thing you felt was his hand behind your neck, pulling you closer as he stood in between your legs, his lips crashing against yours. You sighed as you let yourself be enveloped in his warmth—his tongue tugging yours, his lips devouring yours, his palms pushing against your back, and his breath mixing up with yours.

You felt his hand travel lower down your back, settling on your ass before he pushed you closer to him, earning a soft yelp from between your lips. His mouth detached from yours only to give you a sly smirk before he dove back into you. Your hands rested comfortably on his shoulders as you gave into his every move, and when you felt one of his hands grazing the exposed skin of your thigh from the gap between your skirt and your knee-high socks, you gasped.

“Wanna see what these fingers can do?” Jay asked, speaking right against your lips.

Your eyes searched for his before you nodded a little too eagerly. He chuckled before sliding his hand between your legs and under your skirt. His fingers easily found their place on your clothed cunt, and despite his gentle moves, you could not hold in your moans.

“Jay,” you whimpered, hands bunching up his shirt.

“Oh, I like it when you say my name like that,” he teased, leaving a wet peck on your chin. “Can you say it again?”

He pressed his thumb on your clit before sliding it down your folds, and he could already tell that you were soaked. You were biting your lip, and he chuckled, bringing the same hand that was caressing you up and towards your chin.

“Come on, now,” Jay cooed. “Prefects are usually good students. You’re a good girl, aren’t you?”

His thumb slid upon your bottom lip, and you could almost sniff the scent of your own arousal. You were trembling at this point, desperate to feel more of him, so all you could give as a response was a nod.

“Say my name.”

“Jay—”

Your voice was muffled as he slid in a finger when you opened your mouth. You instinctively sucked on it before he entered another one, and then he hurriedly placed his hand back between your legs, pushing your panties to the side before easily sliding those two fingers inside of you.

“Jay!” You moaned loudly, spreading your legs wider so he could do whatever he wanted to do to you comfortably. Your fingers reached for the back of his head, pulling on his silver locks before you pushed his head to your neck. He began licking the soft skin under your chin before placing wet kisses down your neck. With one hand, you unbuttoned your top and pulled your collar open, giving him more access to your skin. He sucked on your collarbone softly and, at the same time, curled his fingers inside of you.

You repeatedly moaned into his ear, and at some point, you thought you sounded way too pathetic, but the way Jay was thrusting his fingers in and out of you and the way the squelching sound was echoing throughout the whole bathroom made you believe that the sounds you were making were actually quite tame.

“Jay,” you sighed. “Oh, my God.”

Jay lifted his head from your neck and flashed you a proud smirk before leaning in to kiss you again. You whined at the contact, and as your hands found his face, you began to caress him, pull him, and do whatever was necessary to send the message that you wanted him bad.

You felt the increasing pace of his fingers between your legs, and you began to feel the ache in your ass for sitting on the edge of the pool for too long. Jay pressed his thumb on your clit, and you threw your head back in pleasure, grabbing onto his biceps for support. When your moans started to sound higher and more in sync with the movements of his fingers, Jay leaned in and pressed his cheek onto yours before speaking right into your ear.

“Cum for me, will you?”

The deep tone and gentle vibration of his voice sent shivers down your spine, and with that, you finally reached your high. Your legs were shaking, and to soothe you, Jay began kissing your cheek softly. He kept kissing you and moving towards your lips, giving you a long peck before moving down to your chin and neck. He kissed the parts of your skin that were beginning to turn purple, and once he heard your leveled breathing, he pulled away to take a good look at you.

“Good girl,” he said right to your face.

You playfully, and very gently, slapped his face. He let out a wholehearted chuckle before pulling his hand from between your legs. Just seconds later, you heard the sound of footsteps approaching the bathroom door. Your eyes widened, and Jay quickly registered the situation. He fixed your collar for you to button up before he sprinted back to the mirror he was supposed to be polishing while you frantically searched for the abandoned cloth that you had been using the whole time.

“Why am I not surprised that you haven’t finished cleaning the bathroom?” Professor Snape stated after scanning the area. “It’s almost curfew, so wrap up and continue cleaning tomorrow. I’ll consider your detention done once this place is spotless.”

You stood up and observed as Professor Snape reached into the pocket in his robe and took out your wands. After he handed them over to you and Jay, he turned around without further question and left the bathroom. Jay looked at you, and you sighed in relief, almost collapsing to the floor because of your weak knees, if not for Jay holding you up by your elbows.

“That was too damn close,” you commented, standing uncomfortably since your panties were not fixed the right way.

“I’d say it was exciting,” Jay said, leaning into you and sniffing your neck.

“Jay, stop it,” you said, placing your palm firmly on his chest.

“That’s not what you wanted me to do when I had these stubby fingers inside you,” he teased, raising his hand and wriggling his fingers in front of your face.

You smacked his hand away, and he cackled, almost making the room shake from the echo.

“We still need to come back tomorrow and whose fault is that?” You asked, your back turned to him as you were tidying up the supplies.

“Fault?” Jay tilted his head. “No, favor. You’re missing the point. We get to come back here tomorrow.”

You stood up straight before turning to face Jay. He boldly took a couple of steps towards you, closing the distance and pulling you by your waist to press your body against his.

“Are you honestly telling me you’re not looking forward to it?”

With Jay’s arm firmly around your waist, the heat of his body against yours, his eyes boring into yours, and his silver hair messy from the way you were pulling on it earlier, there was no way you could lie to his face.

“Okay, I am looking forward to it,” you said after gaining enough courage. “Maybe instead of your stubby fingers, you can show me something else.”

Jay’s eyes twinkled at your daring tone, and you both chuckled before letting each other go, nagging at him as he collected your supplies while shamelessly ogling your body.

-END-

© forjongseong 2023, all rights reserved dividers by @cafekitsune

back to masterlist // back to navigation

!!! do NOT copy, translate, or repost any of my work to your blog or ANY other platform.

[olderthannetfic]

How do we feel about the "Um just so you know the person you reblogged this from is an [insert undesirables category here]"? When it's some random meme or otherwise uncontroversial post, and not some elaborate political opinion post with a bunch of dogwhistles in it.

Because I just got it from a fandom acquaintance/friend and it felt really fucking unsettling.

Aside from the mutuals that I know from fandom and interact with, most of the other content I interact with on Tumblr is more about what it says than about who said it for me. I don't ever pay attention to who wrote what or which other Tumblr users they had beef with or whatever, I just read the post itself and decide if I like what it says or not. If someone posts something I REALLY dislike, I block them and move on, more in the hopes of seeing less of that sort of thing than with the intention of somehow eliminating that specific person. I never pay attention to who my mutuals are reblogging from and if I note that one of them reblogged something featuring a poster who's famously unhinged, I just assume they don't know and move on because I know my mutuals are reasonable people generally speaking. I like the anonymity of Tumblr and the focus on the content of the posts and not on specific people. It's why I hang out here and not on one of the platforms that are all about influencers and the like.

So today I was going through the blogs of a couple of people I don't follow to find a specific post and in the process I saw a fairly uncontroversial post I liked, reblogged it, and moved on. Then less than an hour later I was met with a wall of text in my DMs accusing that poster of having questionable political opinions and describing the beef they had with another person where they threatened them etc. etc.

TBH I felt incredibly uncomfortable with the level of scrutiny implied in paying attention to who I reblog random shit from, as well as the level of presumption in coming to my DMs and lecture me about it. I know nothing about the blogger they were talking about, have never interacted with him, and will probably never even have the opportunity or the desire to interact with him. He wasn't even the AUTHOR of the post, it was just on his profile. It makes me want to never post anything ever again.

I just... don't see the point of this sort of behaviour in general? "You shouldn't be giving [bad people] a platform" - look, I genuinely don't think that reblogging a pretty landscape from someone who turns out to be a TERF or whatever is platforming those beliefs in any way. I'm sorry, but I just don't see how my behaviour leads to any material harm to anyone. Even if I follow the person, the moment they start talking about TERF-y shit I'm gonna unfollow and/or block. The probability of me throwing all my well-developed political opinions down the drain and getting radicalized through the slippery slope of reblogging "CATS ARE SO CUTE WHEN THEY SWAT AT THINGS" from someone with a dogshit take about Palestine is literally zero. If it's the content of the post that's wrong, just explain why to me, or point out the dogwhistles or whatever. I'm open to being wrong in my opinions. I'm not open to my online friends acting like the fucking Stasi.

Maybe I'm just too old for these newfangled social politics but it just feels like either pointless catty high school drama or an attempt at social control that I can't help but interpret in a hostile manner. Even if it's followed by - as it was in my case - something along the lines of "obviously I'm not accusing YOU of anything!! I'm sorry it came off that way!!" when I pushed back against it. It feels like 1950s conservative housewives making sure you're not even greeting any of the town Undesirables at the grocery store, because you wouldn't want to be Morally Tainted by saying Hello to a divorcee!

It's kind of similar to the whole issue about people still writing HP fic. Am I interested in HP fic? TBH not at all - the author had soured it for me with her behaviour even before it was obvious how much she hated trans people. Do I think the people doing it are somehow harming anyone or putting money in JKR's pocket? I honestly can't see how, and so far none of the people adamantly against it have managed to explain it to me in a satisfying way, so I'm just gonna let it slide off me as another random internet hobby I don't get or care about.

--

My reaction is "Do you understand how Tumblr works? Do you?"

We have enough trouble with people reblogging barely-hidden anti-kink or homophobic shit. Who has time for cootie-based problems?

[the-invisibility-bloke]

001 Sirius/Harry

Have a nice day😃

Oh you're gonna regret this. XD (But I hope you have a nice day too!)

When I started shipping it if I did: 2004? I think they were my first HP ship.

My thoughts: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

What makes me happy about them: THEY SAVE EACH OTHER'S LIVES ON THEIR FIRST AND LAST NIGHTS TOGETHER, RESPECTIVELY. TELL ME ANYTHING MORE ROMANTIC THAN THAT. Also, found family in a sense, but better yet, they were given to each other by James and Lily, and their chemistry from the very beginning is everything, they are so utterly devoted to each other, so thrilled to be in each other's lives, so love-starved and touch-starved, they are each other's links to their past as well as each other's hope for the future. All they want is to care for each other, it's so fucking beautiful it hurts, and the reason it's so fucking hot and just the right amount of sweetly toxic is because they have no fucking boundaries, Harry was raised in abject neglect (so was Sirius, in his own way) and Sirius spent those years in prison so they suffered on parallel timelines and now here they are, a collision of orbits, perfect complements, where Harry was forced to grow up too fast and Sirius' life stopped at 21 so the power imbalance is skewed and fucky and all the lines get blurred because they simply need so desperately, the hunger and yearning, but also the fact they just get each other. They tick each other's boxes, fill all the voids, the need to protect, to be protected, and it's no secret this man was Harry's sexual awakening, a not-father figure but the first man to step up and fill those role model shoes, with his tattoos and his recklessness and his general sexiness/coolness making him unlike any adult who's ever shown Harry affection, not to mention the yummy angst of Past Prongsfoot™, so extra guilt for Sirius there, but more significantly, he very quickly comes to see Harry as his own person. I think he's the first one to see that the similarities to James are less than the differences, and more beautiful for that, and I think it would be a bit terrifying for him to realize he's fallen for Harry as himself and not as a replacement, because now he has no excuse, he can't write it off as an inevitability of loving James. ...Anyway.

What makes me sad about them: HE FUCKING DIES.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: I'd share in DMs, but as someone with the world's lowest self esteem, I never want to discourage anyone from writing what they love.

Things I look for in fanfic: I love canon-compliant or canon-adjacent, desperation and codependency, Harry being first ashamed and afraid of rejection, then when he knows he's got him, shameless about what he wants. I love Sirius being tortured by his own guilt until the explosive breaking point where he loses all self control. OOTP era is my favorite because they're in close physical proximity and there are Opportunities, okay, OPPORTUNITIES. Late-night fireside chats (snogs), Harry slipping into Sirius' room under pretense of nightmares, come on, it fucking writes itself. I'll read the occasional Sirius Lives (just wrote one, in fact), but part of me kinda loves that he dies, because it enables all my OTPs to exist in tandem, case in point...

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Sirius? No one. He's gone for that boy and he dies loving him. But 20 years later, Harry falls for Teddy and is wracked with the most delicious guilt. Is he projecting the godfather-godson dynamic he so brutally lost with Sirius? (No, but the guilt is fun!) I also like the premise of Harry and Draco falling into each other post-divorce, better late than never, but after a lifetime of competing for Teddy's attention, godfather vs cousin, turns out the boy's kind of in love with them both, so H/D/T OT3 is my jam.

My happily ever after for them: Sirius lives, obviously. But I want to write a fic where, after the war, Harry obsessively dedicates himself to working out the mysteries of the veil and getting Sirius back. He succeeds some 20 years later, right after he finally decides to leave the past behind and embrace the present, where his own lovely godson has been madly in love with him for years. So basically he gets Sirius back right after he and Teddy begin a relationship, thus it ends up Sirry+Teddy OT3, but this is where multishipping hits a brick wall because what about Draco. OT4?

who is the big spoon/little spoon: I'm dully traditional and default to whoever's bigger (Sirius), but I think they wake up fairly often with Harry clinging to his back, all nestled in like a cute little parasite.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Motorbike rides, pickup Quidditch, Muggle video games, and I think they like to travel. Harry never did, growing up, and after all those years in Azkaban... yeah. Gay cross-gen wizards take on the world.

[utilitycaster]

Stuck my I Voted sticker on my stress ball due to the joys of living in a swing state.

Valinari Ziegler (or Nari for short) was a character I played in an Exandria campaign that unfortunately died a few years ago due to scheduling issues. He was a half-elf Shadow Sorcerer who eventually multiclassed into Rogue (when the campaign died he was 6 Sorc/2 Rogue, I probably would have gone either Swashbuckler or Mastermind if I'd gotten to level him up).

When I created him, I had two thoughts in mind: I wanted to do something fun with the Shadow Sorcerer ability that allows them to possibly stabilize at 1 HP when they would otherwise drop to 0, and I wanted to create a character with a vested interest in being in an adventuring party (because I've noticed that a lot of the time people struggle to come up with a reason their characters all want to be in a group). I ended up landing on the idea that he was a former member of the Deastok Myriad who was betrayed and almost killed by another member on the orders of someone higher up (only surviving due to his sorcerous abilities kicking in), but he had no idea who or why. His goal, then, was to make powerful friends and come back to find out why he was killed and get revenge.

Once I started playing him, however, a few things I didn't anticipate happened. First, I made him in Heroforge and inadvertently made him look like the MCU version of Loki (I had already named him after the mythological Loki's children), which prompted a whole bunch of jokes from my group and ended up informing his character a good bit--I'd always planned him to be a smooth talker, but the Loki lean in characterization made me more inclined to embark on stupid plans that bit me in the ass as often as they worked out (this also meant I was the character that pushed the shiny red button more often than not, and it caused me to utter the line "Fuck it, I have poor impulse control and proficiency in CON saves", which is one of my favorite things I've ever said in D&D). Among other things, he managed to con a treasure map from a merchant by exchanging it for a piece of bent metal that he claimed to have come from the Whispered One's stronghold but actually was pilfered from a dead kobold, but he also almost got killed by a fiend that he had threatened thinking that she was imprisoned in a way that she couldn't harm him. The other thing that happened was the classic character development of him initially seeing the other party members as instruments of his revenge but coming to care about them (in particular our party's Druid was very nice to him and, in her player's words, immediately engaged Mom Friend mode upon hearing him refer to her, the person she'd traveled with for two weeks, as his oldest and dearest friend and our Monk was both interested in the way he operated and willing to call him out on his bullshit--they had a really fun dynamic).

Mechanically, Nari is one of the characters I've put the most thought into build-wise, and I had a lot of fun playing him in combat. His build was centered on the spell Shadow Blade combined with the Shadow Sorcerer ability to cast a version of the Darkness spell that only the caster can see through. Throw in sneak attack I was doing a lot of damage. The DM also gave me a magic item that allowed me to teleport in dim light and darkness 3 times a day--it was, however, identical in appearance to MCU Loki's stupid helmet.

Hey! I saw your other message, and no, i just got off Tumblr and went to bed last night for my own well-being before seeing this, no worries about word count.

I know it feels, well, kind of silly to finish up now, but I do want to thank you for voting. It's by no means the only tool we as people in the US have to express our opinion nor to enact change, but it's certainly one of the lowest effort for the highest impact and it has become bizarrely fraught on online spaces. And so silly ask memes are by far from the only thing I do around elections or in my advocacy; but they are one of them, and I hope to continue doing them for a long time.

Getting to the actual character, I think Nari sounds all around great. "Why is my character here" is perhaps the most important thing you can ask yourself in any story, whether it's D&D or original fiction, and a lot of people don't, so having a character with clear motivations available is not faint praise: it's a sign that you put care and thought in and I think the relationships your character was able to build with others in the party reflect that. I also think the Darkness + sneak attack combo is a really creative and fun multiclass - a lot of my frustration with rogues is that I love a cool assassin in fiction but D&D mechanics explicitly make being a rogue in that archetype almost impossible, and I think you reclaimed that. And I love a big red button pusher. There's hooks! Find them!

Anyway this game and Nari sounds great, and man, I kind of hope for your sake there's a way to revive it.

[salubriousbean]

I love kiwi birds *clenches fist* so much

Salutations and bonvenon! Thanks for dropping by, I am the salubrious bean. You can call me Bean or Sal or Sally or some other derivative of my username. I usually mostly type how I speak stuff irl. Also I am probably neurospicy ✨. My lucky number is 5 :)

***Please don't send me donation asks, I cannot donate anything.***

Sometimes I declare things Salubrious and sometimes I forget I do that

"Let our hearts and hands be stretched out in compassion toward others, for everyone is walking his or her own difficult path." - Dieter F. Uchtdorf

I want this blog to be a safe space for everyone and I'll do my best to keep it that way! If something makes you uncomfortable please tell me and I will do my best to rectify it.

some links:

my pinterest account: https://pin.it/1NNV9VU3T

star wars rp blog with a clone trooper oc, go check it out! : @ct-7045 🫡

The 495th Division!

( ^ Now with their own blog! @the495th )

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Fandoms I am in (in no particular order):

STAR WARS

EPIC: The Musical

LOTR

about every Brandon Sanderson book

Urinetown the musical (I made a urinetown community!

Something Rotten!

Moon Knight

Bluey!

Curious George? (one of my fave childhood shows)

Gravity Falls

Ranger's Apprentice/Brotherband Chronicles

Carmen Sandiego (2019)

Wild Kratts

Octonauts

Amphibia

ATLA

The Princess Bride

Kim Possible

Roald Dahl books

Harry Potter (I don't support jk rowling but I grew up on hp so)

Pirates of the Caribbean

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (not the film, a production by a local high school that I'll never get to see again but it was life-changing in an amazing way)

HTTYD (although I've only seen the first two movies so far)

Septimus Heap (currently rereading!)

A Jump In Time series by Andrew Varga (PLEASE IF YOU KNOW THESE SEND ME AN ASK I LOVE THEM AND I CANT WAIT FOR BOOK 4)

The Scarlet Pimpernel (I've only seen the musical but I love it)

Les Misérables (I've only seen the movie but I love it)

Between the Lines (the musical, haven't read the book yet)

other assorted fandoms

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

If you're ever bored or need someone to talk to please feel free to send an ask (or several) or dm me! You can fr spam me with asks 'cause i love them, just keep 'em appropriate. Feel free to tag me in reblog/picrew/etc chains! I find those really fun <3

Do not follow me if you are a NSFW/porn blog. If you have mature content like that but also other stuff you can follow me, but please please tag that stuff.

A post/reblog chain I found if you're having a bad day: https://www.tumblr.com/fiddlepickdouglas/644601820180840448/in-case-anyone-is-having-a-bad-night?source=share

Other stuff under the cut so this post isn't too kriffing long to scroll past:

Other information about me: major music nerd, I play piano and double bass. I also dance but that doesn't mean I have balance lol. I'm in my third year of pointe. Also I like hoarding the cardboard tab thingies you rip off of tissue boxes (i have so many help /j). I also like trying to balance those Cadbury chocolate eggs so they're standing up. cilantro my beloved ✨️

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Languages I am currently learning: ASL (American Sign Language), Esperanto (on Duolingo), and Italian (also on Duolingo)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

✨MY PERSONAL TAGS✨ (I added colors bc I was bored) (they're all at the bottom of this post so you can click on them) (yea they are kinda redundant) (i just wanted tags that were uniquely mine) :

art: #salubriousbean art

writing: #salubriousbean writes

answering asks: #salubriousbean answers

posts I had in my queue: #salubriousbean queue (my queue is very random and extremely backed up oops)

polls: #salubriousbean poll

POSTS WITH MY ORIGINAL CHARACTERS WOOO: #salubriousbean oc

tags I might use again?:

music rambling: #salubriousbean talks about music

rambling posts about other stuff: #salubriousbean rambles

things I declare Salubrious (which in this case means I really really really love it): #IT HAS BEEN DECLARED SALUBRIOUS

25 followers: #salubriousbean 25 follower celebration

50 followers: #salubriousbean 50 follower celebration

100 followers: #salubriousbean 100 follower celebration [link]

talking about the Star Wars series The Acolyte: #salubriousbean talks about the Acolyte

What's In A Name? series (where I talk about why I gave my original characters their names)(yeah sorta pointless but idc): #what's in a name

posts I really relate to: #tis me

posts that aren't mine that I approve of: #salubriousbean approves 👍

posts where i draw myself: #salubriousbean self portrait

posts where I talk about the Star Wars show Skeleton Crew: #salubriousbean talks about skeleton crew

talking 'bout the weather :) : #salubriousbean talks about the weather

talkin about song combos I get on liked songs shuffle: #shuffle shenanigans

other/random: #salubriousbean random

Huh, pretty self-explanatory tags I guess, I'll try an tag all of the posts I make

I use star wars swears but not actual real life ones 👍 those might be in reblogs tho so sorry bout that

I'll edit this masterpost as needed.

God is good. May the Force be with you. Always.

[goodfish-bowl]

Saving Throw

Ectoberhaunt 2023 Day 6: Tabletop

AO3 Link

Summary: Danny invites Sam and Tucker over to play D&D, asking Spike for a favor to DM the game for them.

Warnings: minor character death, only dialog

Words: 829

“Okay, I’m going to enter the dungeon.”

“I follow into the dungeon.”

“I…  also follow into the dungeon.”

“Okay… so what do we see?”

“It seems to be some sort of laboratory, with metal tables lined up against the walls, open chests full of vials and potions all this bright green color. There are all sorts of tools, journals, and pieces of… something, lying on the tables, and it’s decently cold down here. And, taking up the entire back wall is a cavern, circled by runes, that the entire laboratory seems centered around. What do you do?”

“Oh! The artificer in me loves this place already! I go and investigate the things on the table! Gotta start with the small stuff before looking at the big picture.”

“Yeah, have fun with that. I go and investigate the big hole in the wall.” 

“Eh, why not? I follow… Raven to the back.” 

“Okay, Swave, let’s start with you. I need you to roll both an arcana and… eh, an investigation check works.”

“Cool, okay… that’s a… 7 for arcana and 16 for investigation.”

“So, on the table, you can definitely tell whoever lives here was tinkering with something magic, but you can’t tell what kind other than green and glowy. It’s just a bit too far removed from your area of expertise. Whatever it is, they don’t seem to be getting the results they want, judging from the notes. But, they’ve definitely accomplished something recently.”

“Damn, really wish I rolled higher on that arcana.”

“It is what it is. So, with Raven and Orion. Now that you’re closer, you notice that there are runes inscribed around the cavern, roll an Arcana.”

“Nice, 18 plus 3, 21.”

“I rolled an 8.”

“Okay, well, Raven, you completely recognize these runes, you even notice some blatant errors in some of them. They seem to be an activation sequence of some kind, a gate, even. Orion, you know what a small handful of the runes mean, but nothing coherent.”

“Okay… I uh… go inside the cavern.”

“Eh! I dunno dude, I don’t think it’s a good idea to walk into the giant magic gate in the underground lab.”

“Nah, let him, I’m curious.”

“It’s too late to take it back now. Raven, what are you doing while he’s walking inside?”

“Hmmm, do I notice Orion walking inside?”

“Roll a perception.”

“… that’s a solid 3.”

“Then no.”

“Okay, I’m going to fix the runes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Hey! Don’t do that! I’m literally walking inside of it right now! Can’t you wait until I’m out?”

“First off, I didn’t notice you go inside, second, the runes are wrong, of course I’m going to fix them. It’s what my character would do!”

“Oh no…” 

“Swave, I want you to also roll a perception check.”

“… Sorry dude, that’s a 5 at best.”

“Ughhhh.”

“Raven, roll an arcana again to correct the runes.”

“17.”

“Congrats, you’ve fixed the runes. Orion, roll a dex save.”

“NO!”

“AH!”

“Oops.”

“… a 2.”

“Ouch, man. Okay, so Raven and Swave. As Orion enters the cavern, and Raven fixes the runes, they start glowing, and there’s a tearing sound as green pours out from the hole in the wall.”

“NOooOooo…”

“Hmm, just for kicks, Orion, roll a con save.”

“Okay… man, this sucks, first session and I’m already… that’s a nat 20.”

“Seriously?!”

“Wow, this will be interesting. So, Orion, as you enter the cavern, now known to be a portal, it lights up with green magic, and races through you, like it’s cooking you alive. But due to the force, it launches you out, and you land in the middle of the laboratory floor… Lower your hp to 1, and use up two death saves. Also, change your race to tiefling. I’ll send you the rest of the stuff when I figure it out.”

“YOOO!”

“Haha… yeah… wow.”

“Hey, Spike, thanks for coming over to DM today.”

“No problem. It’s good to help a friend's sibling with something I’m good at. Especially when he’s trying to make new friends, and it’s not like Jazz was ever going to call in that favor.”

“Yeah, it was really cool. Thank you, but wasn’t it a bit ‘on the nose’ to use my parent’s basement as a reference?”

“Hey, it’s a good inspiration. Besides, you’re the one who walked into it, prior knowledge or not.” 

“Haha… yeah that’s on me… didn’t think it was actually going to do anything until Sam decided to fix the runes.” 

“Yeah, not the best move from a group perspective. But… Jazz said they’re expecting to finish it within the next year.”

“Yeah… maybe. Most of their stuff just covers us in goo. I just hope they finish it soon… they’ve been down there a lot, ya know?”

“Yeah… I do.”

“Anyways, I’m sure I’ll see you around. I’ll tell Jazz you said ‘hi’ whenever she gets home from tutoring.”

“Thanks, little dude. See you around.”

“Later.”

Ectoberhaunt 2023 Master Post

[sagespirit-wc]

hii u can call me sage or aspen. i’m 22 and this is my wc side blog (my main is thelittlefrogblog if u wanna see silly stuff i post there)

some things i’m currently working on + what they will entail, just in case you’re interested:

full disclosure i’m a full time student and my obsession w warriors goes on and off so the progress may be slow/nonexistent at times

my first warriors fanfic piece is in progress. it’s called Oh Starclan, Not Again (much like oh god not again the hp fic) in which starclan makes firestar go back in time before he joins after his death cause they’re a bag of dicks and he’s the cat jesus. i think it’s fun and silly. it’s on AO3 under my pseud sagespirit currently.

my second idea was based on an idea moonkitti mentioned in one of their vids - they mentioned they wanted to see the next warriors series based far off in the future and that sounded dope so i made an au type thing based far in the warrior future. it includes a big old prophecy, a bunch of lesbian medicine cats, and prophecy cats including queens and full grown cats alongside two cute warrior apprentices who will fall in love (and not die or become toxic) so watch out for that. it will be very selfish

and ofc you can’t write warriors fanfic if you don’t rewrite the series so that’s my plan for my third project - it’ll be essentially the same plot as the og but i will change things that made me mad and more selfish choices, such as:

lionblaze is no longer boring and is now the himboist of himbos to ever himbo

hollyleaf is gay (probably for cinder)

names that i think are dumb will be changed (mostly nostalgia-fueled, sorry)

bramble will not be an abusive piece of shit and will actually be a dope husband and father

he will also die/retire earlier cause i want him to

firestar doesn’t have a thing for spottedleaf and loves his wife sandstorm and only his wife sandstorm

they also have more kits than squirrel and leaf cause i think fire would love being a dad

jay is slightly less of a little shit - still sarcastic but his heart is less frozen and his bitterness comes from his love and fear of losing those he loves

when they change the code they will also change the whole med cats not having mates/kits thing cause it’s dumb

starclan ISNT a huge bag of dicks

more death/less useless background characters

useless background characters get personalities

women aren’t vilified for no reason other than for the hatred of women

and more to be determined - those are just what i know so far i want to change

AND 2024 update - my tumblr friends and i started a very casual warriors rp !! dm me if you’d like to join. it’s 18+ just for safety but it’s super chill and lowkey and a lot of the people in it aren’t in the fandom they’re just there cause they love me. it’s called pineclan and we’re making up our own religion lore !!!

so yeah hope that excites anyone at all and if it doesn’t too bad i’m still going to keep writing it. if it does excite you and you have more ideas feel free to let me know and i just might include them!!

[snarkythewoecrow]

Truth or Dare Tag Game

Okay, I am totally avoiding all my wips right now, so doing this instead, thanks @underwaterninja13

Which friends/mutuals would you call to hide a body?

@buckybeardreams I feel they would help without too many questions, and probably those would only be where and when, and if I needed a shovel

How many user subscriptions do you have on Ao3?

eh, more than some, less than others, but it's in the 4 digits

Do you have a crush on someone? OR If you're with someone, tell us one thing you love about them.

my hubby cuz he's ride or die, and didn't get all cranky yesterday when informed him in had spilt an ice coffee on the spare clip to my gun, and then kinda forgot to tell him for two days, and it had like caramel in it, and yeah, it was sticky and gross, but he cleaned it all for me, and still loved me after, and my bestie denim cuz they know all the right things to say when shit is extra shitty

What does the last DM/text you sent say?

(we were discussing tommy/buck lol)

totally, like all his other relationships were shit shows waiting to crash and burn, and like it showed, hence needing to talk to bobby every time about them, but like, yeah, with tommy it's different, it's a whole different vibe, mature and safe, for once his relationship isn't chaos and built on some weird and unhealthy foundation, like what he has with Tommy is just so different because if you think about it, he is the first person that doesn't want Buck to be something he's not, doesn't want anything from him other than to be part of his company, Tommy is patient and just wants him, wants Evan, and like there is no drama attached to it, they are equals and meeting with mutual understanding of careers, like they can just be and Buck doesn't need to struggle against what he'd faced in the past, partners only seeing him as a hero or a slut or as an object of death to study, like he really can just be himself with tommy

List the three friends/mutuals with the best takes.

@kittyneedsbetterhobbies @buckybeardreams

Share one of your favorite fics of all time.

yeah, I just went and stared at my bookmarks and then closed the tab cuz got overwhelmed, seriously, it's so all mood related for me, but there are some that are memorial for me, for sure, so maybe a few randoms that i recall enjoying but might be lesser known:

Jar of Hearts by Cupcakemolotov -- Caroline/Klaus (Vampire Diaries)

Of Old Soldiers and Missing Wars by NonchalantxFish -- Steve Rogers & Tom Riddle (MCU and HP)

of stitches and first meetings by buckaroos -- Buck/Eddie (911 but kinda crossed with supernatural)

List three of your favorite content creators.

wrinkling my nose at "content creators" being used as a term here, but anyway, definitely @voxofthevoid and um, pretty sure I don't have any others that stick out

Write one thing you love about yourself.

that i'm getting much better at being myself, no matter how weird that may be to some

Which fandom of yours (past or present) has the best fics?

idk, depends what you want to read, some fandoms are smaller, some focus more on wholesome shit, some are more big enough to include a wide variety of fuckery, so best depends on what's best to you at the time, but the bigger and older the fandom, the more likely the writers have life experience and actually had anal before which, my god, unless you like a finger in your ass for foreplay, my god, what is with the one-two-three fingers, you're all stretched, now let's go, shit? like every time??? anyway, continuing on......

Which creation of your own are you the most proud of?

Came back to edit and scratch that answer out, I really like and maybe not the most proud of, but definitely up there:

a little dented (but definitely not broken) by snarkymuch --this was important to me for many reasons, but proud of how it turned it, and of the emotion it captured

uh... not me forgetting everything i've ever written rn, um, i like a lot of the self harm ones, with buck/eddie, the emotion was nice to write, the build and tension, tbh, i'm blanking--i mean, the pikachu one was cute, also can't remember what it's called rn though, something like, I choose you pikachu (and other ways two idiots say i love you) <--could be way off on title there

Have you ever read RPF?

not really, though kinda suppose that's what I do with my friend by accident all the time when talking fic ideas

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) most likely to get away with murder.

probably myself, or like me and @buckybeardreams

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) who know(s) the most about you.

@buckybeardreams and weirdly, pretty sure @plotbunnypettingzoo has picked up so many random facts from reading my posts and talking to me

Now tag some friends to play!

@plotbunnypettingzoo @buckybeardreams @kittyneedsbetterhobbies and anyone else interested

[sagesariadnd]

Please Watch March on Faewunder. I Just Think It's Neat.

I'm waiting on a few things before I start posting pictures like I promised, so in the meantime, I have a recommendation if you're looking for a D&D actual play show that isn't one of the Big Three.

I've fairly recently started dipping my toes into the World of Io, a collection of streamed short campaigns set in the DM's homebrew world of, well, Io. I started with, and am still in the middle of, March on Faewunder. I started it because my current parasocial squish Tom Fawkes is in it, and I'm sticking with it for some of the most wholesome and funny roleplay I've ever seen. A warning now that the following is an unhinged infodump about how much I love this campaign, but I promise a link is at the bottom!

Highlights include:

Actually streaming session zero! I don't know if other shows have done this, but it's the first time I've seen it and found it really cool to see the process in action. This includes an introduction to Io's history and world makeup and answering the players' questions about it, so it's great for onboarding new viewers because they don't have to have watched the other campaigns. Plus, hearing the players talk about the kind of characters they were making made me immediately excited for the campaign and the dynamics within the party, which was clearly the case for the people watching too because there was fanart literally that night.

Mark Hulmes - the host of High Rollers...you know, that actual play show that did the one-shot with the Baldur's Gate 3 cast last year - playing a half-lagomon paladin with the energy of DiC dub Sailor Moon. Yeah that's right, a grown-ass man is shamelessly playing his ideal bunny girl waifu and nobody judges him for it because Gloria is a precious cinnamon roll and must be cherished.

A southern belle dhampir ranger named Vidalia whose parasol is both a sword and a gun...crossbow...thing. Also she's a swarmkeeper ranger and her swarm is birds! Used to be corvids, now I think it's hawks. And she's the sweetest damn person you'll ever meet and doesn't even hide that she's a vampire.

An elf bard named Pandora who got her name literally because her player thought it was fun to say in her character voice, and she says it to herself in character when she's anxious. She's also a vampire hunter who's afraid of birds.

Disclaimer: Pandora is an emotional wreck of a character with a heart of gold and she WILL make you cry at least every other session.

Did I mention those three are totally in an awkward disaster lesbian cuddle puddle? Cause they totally are. Vidalia even calls Gloria 'hunny bun' and it's the most adorable thing in the world.

Hey, you wanna have lots of emotions about skeletons? Well Tom has you covered with Ribeye, the skeleton bard who wants to be a chef! (Gee, DM, how come your mom lets your campaign have TWO bards?) Don't be fooled by his punny name or his Ed Wynn voice, this skeleton will fuck you up emotionally almost as much as Pandora. This youtube funnyman has made his fellow players wail loudly into the microphone like Rocky freaking Lockridge.

And you wanna know why there's so many emotions about skeletons? Well for one thing Tom's just really good at roleplaying but the big catalyst is that neither Ribeye in character, nor any of the players out of character, know Ribeye's HP. The DM just tells him if he gets knocked out. The DM rolls his hit dice for him. And he can't be healed by normal healing magic, only necromancy. Yeah uh...nobody in the party can cast necromancy. They found a backup, but it's VERY temporary and the DM plays the game HARD. Your butt WILL clench every single time Ribeye takes damage. The party's butts sure do. No really, it's genuinely sweet how hard they all work to protect their skelebro.

I feel bad that I don't have a lot to say comparatively about the last member, the changeling monk Kagami. I think he's just along for the ride. But he's there, and he's as badass as a monk should be, and he's the source of a good few funny moments, including the ever optimistic statement "I haven't exploded yet!" (no you don't get context, watch the show) and the pure D&D energy of spending all your money on a stupid carnival prize because it's so ridiculous you just HAVE to have it. It even comes in handy, how the heck did that happen???

If you like crafting, Faewunder has you covered with all sorts of fun homebrewing! Every long rest is an adventure! Ribeye whips up all sorts of fun dishes and names them! Kagami supes up everyone's weapons and armor! Pandora desperately tries to keep up the supply of potions Ribeye can drink! The DM has a chart of all sorts of fun buffs they can unlock and put on their gear, so long as there's time to make it. It takes up a decent chunk of the sessions, but the party makes it work through...

Camp RP! Banter and sharing feelings around the campfire almost every long rest, including the ones that come from just travel time with nothing happening! I've never seen a party so willing to share their feelings with each other and they're so delightfully close, even if Kagami's still keeping things close to his scarily muscular chest at the moment.

Intense combat with some of the wildest luck (or usually lack thereof) I've ever seen on a VTT. I thought it was roll20 that hated us, who kicked Foundary's dog???

Crazy fae shit

Fucked up trees! Every DM needs to have at least one fucked up tree encounter.

Fun with voice modulators!

Distinct and lovable NPCs!

A disclaimer that the NPCs will never flirt with the PCs unless the PCs initiate. That's just a good rule of thumb to have in a DM-player dynamic! I mean, check that the DM is comfortable with it too, but really I'm just sad that 'not sicing a horny NPC on my players' is noteworthy.

A channel in the Io discord exclusively for rules lawyering, so the DM can receive feedback on goofed up rules (or ignore the ones from people who forget his houserules) without them cluttering up the twitch chat or distracting him from running the game! Now THAT'S innovation, y'all!

Fanart every night, and bingo cards that the DM fills out with the chat!

The DM is a racoon wizard! Seriously, how can you say no to that?!

Anyway it's really good, and if any of this sounds appealing the playlist is below. It's a relatively short campaign - 13 sessions averaging around three hours apiece. I'll definitely be checking out the rest of the Io campaigns after I finish Faewunder, but I feel like it's gonna be hard to top this group.

[thrumugnyr]

Of course @kat-therines-blog! I didn't think most people would care as it's a very OC specific side quest, but let me elaborate under the cut! (Minor spoilers for Curse of Strahd).

So, our Warlock's patron was one of the entities trapped in the amber temple. He didn't know at the beginning, as he had amnesia ever since he ended up in Barovia.

One of the special powers his patron gave him was the magic missile attack. But it turned out that every time he used it, a tiny part of his soul was ....sucked out of him with it. We only really put 1 and 2 together when it was too late and boom, soul gone. For a while we just went on like this, but of course Barovia is a dangerous place and having one player that you can't revive at all was freaking us out lol

Enter Patataj and his great idea to ask his friend Senna for help. Senna is an Aasimar sun god in training and she's always looking for followers (Patataj is the only one so far, and more in a 'supportive friend' kinda way rather than being an actual devout follower. She helped him escape when he was captured by orcs that one time).

Senna is my DM's character from an other campaign - so obviously she couldn't really be in the game per se, but her and Patataj were in contact through sendings and it was agreed that we could perform a ritual and with enough luck she might be able to rip the warlocks soul away from the being holding it and making her the new patron instead.

We went to the lake in Kresk, where Patataj's connection to Senna was strongest, and did the ritual in there.

Essentially we had to battle some lesser nightmare and other minions and survive for 10 rounds. Sadly, Gunther (the warlock) failed literally all the rolls against those attacks that permanently reduced his HP - and eventually, in the last round, his HP went down to 0 - without Patataj able to heal him back up or anything. And so we lost.

Now Patataj is upset for failing Gunther and he's also cross with Senna for not being able to hold onto the soul (though it is not really her fault at all and deep down he knows that of course).

Meanwhile Rahadin showed up for emotional support and hesitantly admits to Patataj that he was also kind of looking into a similar ritual and is quite pleased to see that it is potentially possible. Though right now he wants to work together with the group to prevent the entity that has Gunthers soul from escaping its prison at the amber temple, which now seems quite likely.

All this while we just try to save Kresk from starving and a werewolf from freezing!! Patataj has a lot on his plate I swear.

[thehoneybeet]

do you have any advise for finding beta readers? i'm currently 20k words deep in a wip and have no idea where to even start 😅 i would post an advert, but i'm worried that won't get the reach i would like because i'm not very engaged in the hp fandom. any advice would be much appreciated!!

Hello anon friend! @the-starryknight wrote a similar guide on finding fandom community here. But here's mine for finding a beta:

Discord (if you don't have one, I highly recommend it)

If you write drarry, the Drarry Discord Server (18+) is an incredible resource! You can request alpha/beta help in the 'planning-editing-help' channel, which is full of people who would be happy to help. Just briefly describe your project and the kind of feedback you're looking for.

I've also found betas for non-drarry ships in there, too, so it's not strictly drarry. That said, there are other discord servers if you are looking for something different:

HP SAFFICS (18+) for wlw ships ('alpha-beta-britpick' channel)

HP Fanfic Writers' Guild for any ship and also a greater variety of resources for writers ('trade-room')

If you're participating in a fest, many of them have their own servers where you can request beta help as well! Usually their tumblr accs will post a link to the fest discord.

Tumblr posts

I know you mentioned you're not sure how much engagement you'll get. If you ever do want to make a post though, feel free to tag/dm me and I will reblog! I'm sure others would be happy to spread the word as well. And like starry said, the more you interact with other people, reblog their stuff, and comment on their fics, etc., the better they will recognise you and jump at the chance to help you out <3

And finally, I know this is a bit scary, but:

You can DM people individually

If you know that they accept beta requests, you can start with that, but if not you can just start by saying hello, flailing about their work, or just talking about writing things. It's always good to make friends even if you don't get a beta out of it.

I frequently beta for other writers (see my treatment post), and there are several of us on tumblr who will happily take beta requests. My fandom life is really full right now, so I might be limited in how much I could help with, but anyone who feels comfortable being asked to beta is welcome to comment on this post as well!

I hope this is helpful, my lovely anon, and don't hesitate to reach out again if you're having a hard time finding someone.

[egg-node]

hi hey? I think I love Relic and would love to know more about them/their story :3c Your writing is lovely, also

i've had this in my inbox for. a hot-ish minute. a lukewarm one (it's been 5 days)

thanks so much, anon! appreciate you. they're not a character i think of terribly often now since the campaign has been on hiatus for. over a year, and i left the campaign maybe a month ago officially. but! they are dearly beloved by the me.

(i put a cut here because turns out! even though i have forgotten a lot! i have an amount to say about them)

their story, summarized:

was made to (and did) fight in the blood age ("...a period of tremendous violence... The wars were so terrible that they shock even Lorehold students of today.") was good at it, and remains good at fighting. did not have a name at this point

in one battle, they were "killed" by a fireball. rather than dying, they woke up centuries later, with the blood age ended by the founder dragons, and an era of peace upon the world. of note is that they woke up with plants and rust on them, which prevented them from moving at all.

at some point after they woke up, they get found by researchers/archaeologists exploring the area (presumably to find artifacts from the era they were from). at some point, they probably heard one of the researchers refer to the recovered objects as "relics", and this stuck with them, and became their name.

they arrived at the school, having decided that going to this place that was founded by the dragons was the best plan. or at least a plan. mostly wanted to learn how they ended it, and to understand their motivations, since relic is very much at a lost as to what to do now

the campaign never really expanded beyond what was in the Strixhaven Book, although our dm was potentially thinking about diverging after we began our second year.

this did mean that most of the encounters we steamrolled. beyond encounter two (which were the only enemies that had a dex save attack rather than an attack roll), relic never took any damage. i don't think any of our party beyond encounter 2 ever took damage bc the dm mostly stuck to attacking them, and i am. unfortunately. a bit of a gamer (derogatory) and relic has good ac.

due to that, never got to implement my Relic Has A Good Day (lie) when they got reduced to 0 hp during combat. or other reasons i suppose? yeah. given that the last time they were unconscious they woke up to their entire world changed to something unrecognizable, i think they would been fine with it. i'm lying lol

some various tidbits:

all of their belongings post timeskip (of a sort) were destroyed due to the natural wear and tear of many many years. they mourned their sword the most, probably. they asked if it was possible to recover, but it had long since been rusted to disrepair

ended up grabbing a familiar. owl :) it's very round. i wish i was able to develop their relationship more. i think it would've been a source of comfort, given enough time, since it was something that could not be taken away from them, even if another Many Century Rest occurred

has a very, very distant sense of humor that does not get the chance to see the light of day most of the time. they were. unfortunately. rather taciturn. and probably would only ever think them in their head rather than say them aloud. would probably be a little embarrassed/flustered if they ever did voice them

their preferred food/beverage is whatever the person they were accompanying ordered, so that they could hand it off to them

ah. i just remembered that they chose to go into lorehold (alongside the kenku wizard of our party. i miss rustle. man). chose that school bc they did want to learn about the past (and was From The Past) and this was the best way to do so. probably is living in the past too much, and would need to learn how to balance it with looking towards a potential future. but! never developed that far

they're a little frustrated/confused at other lorehold students for being so. reticent? apprehensive? of learning about the blood age, or finding it "too violent". it's not like they know that relic was a part of it (that's something that isn't really. shared) but it was fine, for them. it was just their life, and they. maybe not "enjoyed it" because that implies a level of joy that they don't really feel, but they were happy enough to live it.

it's been a while since i've thought about them as much as i have for this ask. so thanks again! it's been nice thinking about the aspects that i like about them. blorbo in my head, slowly simmering in the soup somewhere in there :^)

[boundless-iridescence]

Mun Info

Hello and welcome!! Here like any other reasonable roleplayer; to have fun and delve into interesting depths by taking on characters as a muse, and this blog is my chance to touch on a lot of character muses I have deep fascination and curiosity for through various fandoms. While I do not profess to play these muses to any level of perfect, I will strive to play them satisfactory to others, but most of all to enjoy them by my understand and standards of their characterization. Here, I’ll share some basic info about myself, for anyone who want to know, but you’re also free to pop by my Asks if you’re curious about anything else.

NAME: Jordan, or Ashton (DarkPrinceInc on Discord)

AGE: 28 (born 1995, in case I don’t keep up with updating age)

GENDER: Genderfluid (She/Her + He/Him pronouns, no preference)

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN ROLEPLAYING?: Both started around age 13, more or less. My writing has been growing since that age, but my more in-depth roleplaying (IE my more passionate efforts in playing canon characters and studying them) started in 2012 when I was 16/17, and has been growing as well since.

WHAT FANDOMS DO YOU RP?: Generally, just the ones with my current muses, as of 2/13/24, which are FF8, Genshin Impact, HP, MHA/BNHA, MCU, and general OC content. More can be applied over time, and more fandoms can flow over, so long as we can plot it out to satisfaction between one another!

ARE YOU OPEN TO AUs?: Always. I might have to turn some down if they don’t catch my interest, but I am open to trying out things! I simply just want to play these character, in all their complexity and depth of emotion. So for any scenarios that allow that, I am on board!!

AM I OPEN TO SHARING HEADCANONS?: Yes, for specific aus, and some I might apply to my version of characters if I like them. But my headcanons are also adaptive, they might apply to one RP, and not the other. Feel free to send me an ask, as I will not, as of yet, be making any list.

AM I OPEN TO OCs?: Yes, though I will say that if I feel the story or muse interest is low, I may have to turn down the originally proposed roleplay, and I do hope you do not take offense. But I am certainly not apposed to OCs interacting with my muses, and I have an OC of my own as well. So long as we can be respectful!

AM I OPEN TO NSFW CONTNET?: Yes, certainly. It can be on here, so long as it’s tagged and formatted appropriately, or on Discord (just DM me for my info). I like to get to know the roleplayer first however, so don’t DM for smut without even interacting first, and generally I go with development to such scenarios, but hey, sometimes mutual muses hit, so it’s cool. But generally, I tend to demand chemistry or else, no smut or even shipping. NSFW also counts for violence and such, though, so as long as it’s discussed so it can be executed comfortably and tagged appropriately as well, I’m find with it. Am I open to asks/memes? Hell yes, hit me up, just make it clear who you’re addressing!

DO I DO THE MAIN ‘THING’?: As in, do I choose select roleplayers for muses and interact with them only–no. Granted, I may develop greater interaction, and therefor preference, of certain peoples interpretations but thus far, I’ve never practiced that and likely won’t. So if you see me interacting with someone and that also happens to be your muse? I am still more than open to interacting with you!

DO NOT TOLERATE:: Anon Hate, Ship war crap/ship judgment (so long as you aren't practicing what you roleplay IRL if it is illegal or toxic, then have at it), racism/sexism/homophobia/transphobia/any form of queerphobia, as well as queer/ablism/ageism/etc. Just, don’t come near my blog with that shit. I’m rarely political here, but if I ever share anything you don’t agree with, feel free to unfollow, better and healthier for everyone involved.

If there’s any other info you’re like me to update here for you, please let me know!!

[ivyquill]

request rules

these dividers were made by firefly-graphics

general etiquette (please do not take offence to these, i am just establishing my boundaries and wants so that we can both respect each other! i have had difficulties on my other accounts in the past due to these reasons, it has nothing to do with you!) - please do not spam! i sometimes take a long time to fulfil requests because i want to give them the best quality and attention as i would for one of my own wips, your support is very dear to me and i want to express that appreciation! ♡ - please reblog once i have finished your request! it helps me out and i greatly appreciate it, here is a guide explaining the reblog system to any newbies (don't worry, i've been there too) - please send me more than just the pairing e.g character x reader | i appreciate that you might struggle with coming up with ideas and if you are really struggling i do not mind but if at all possible then i would appreciate more description of what you would like even if it is just a trope - please do not request the same thing to multiple writers! in my experience it is quite hurtful to experience excitement for a request and then see the requester has sent it to multiple writers, i know it is most likely not intended as rude but i think quite a lot of my fellow mutuals and writers feel the same way about it ♡ - please do not send more than five at a time unless i post a statement asking for more, it can be stressful otherwise

fic requests - describe what it is that you want even if it is just a trope or vibe e.g friends to lovers, fluff, angst - pronouns! | if you do not send them to me then i will have to choose myself which will most likely be they/them or ambiguous to make the work as inclusive as possible - i will write for yandere and/or dark themes - i will not write for physical abuse - i will not write for self-harm

smut requests - tell me the type of anatomy for the reader | i need to know the body type to be able to write for it e.g afab which stands for assigned female at birth or amab which stands for assigned male at birth, if you do not tell me then i will choose afab as it is the most familiar to me and is my own - tell me any preferred kink or tone you would like e.g rough or tender - i will not write noncon but i will consider dubcon under specific circumstances of the relationship so i will need you to explain that part to me e.g why is it dubious (just to be neater i would prefer to be told over dms but i'm not picky)

headcanon requests - my headcanons can range from 14 points to 40 points so please establish whether you would like long or short! i understand that not everyone will appreciate my tangents!

fandoms i will write for and post on this account - marauders - harry potter - hp universe - twilight - scream - derry girls - marvel - heartstopper - bridgerton - killing eve - sex education - the hunger games - stranger things - never have i ever - wednesday - little women - bones and all

[phdmama]

So apparently there’s some stirring of the top bottom stuff going on and since I... really like numbers, I thought I’d take a look (also because I’m so concrete it would literally never occur to me that someone would send me an ask that wasn’t... you know, genuine!).

Charts below break!

Data Collection:

AO3, searched within fics tagged as Harry Potter fandom and then tagged with Harry & Draco as a relationships, only fics tagged E. Four categories of search per year: 

Include Bottom Harry Potter, Exclude Bottom Draco Malfoy (HP !DM)

Include Bottom Draco Malfoy, Exclude Bottom Harry Potter (DM !HP)

Exclude Bottom Harry Potter, Exclude Bottom Draco Malfoy (!HP !DM)

Include Bottom Harry Potter, Include Bottom Draco Malfoy (HP DM)

I did not include 2022 numbers as the year is not over. As a check, I also noted total fics per year and total fics tagged explicit and made sure my four mutually exclusive groups added up to my total explicit count.

So the obvious take from this is that the majority of fics are not being tagged with who bottoms. In the cases where they are tagged, Bottom Draco fics are tagged more than Bottom Harry fics every year I looked at. The ratio gets smaller and smaller every year, but even in 2021 the ratio is 1.73, with over 100 more fics being tagged for Bottom Draco than Bottom Harry. The ratio droped substantionally in 2015, and I am not sure why (maybe a new archive was imported with different tagging conventions?).

To get a better sense of how it looks, this is the chart without the “neither” fic numbers included:

This chart gives a sense for each individual year, how the fics are labeled (not to be compared to each other, of course):

Also just because I think it’s sort of interesting, here’s a comparison of the proportions of of E/Non-E fics, definitely looks like there’s a downward trend in E fics there.

The one other thing I was interested in was the claim that there was a trolling incident that led to this reversal of dynamics (which, as we can see from the data, didn’t happen). I went back and looked and my own rage-written fic was posted on April 28, 2021). So I looked at the montly stats for Only Bottom HP/Only Bottom DM/Total E fic posted by month and then eyeballed the proporations. So, it is true that May of 2021 is the only month where Bottom HP fics were higher (both in absolute numbers and proportion of total E fics), but that’s the only month that happens (4/2020 to 4/2022). Over that timeframe, about 6.56% of E fics are exclusively Bottom HP, while on average, exclusively Bottom DM are ~14%. In the months following, in fact, in general the Bottom HP numbers are pretty low.

So, what (if anything) does this mean? For me, for one, it solidifies that I personally really dislike reducing fic to this particular dynamic. I think it would be really interesting to do some investigating into why authors do or do not tag their fics for this dynamic, since I’m guessing most of us are aware that it’s a hot button topic (and has been in every fandom I’ve ever been in or hung out near). I know why I don’t, but I wouldn’t want to assume. Maybe I’ll write a survey.

I find the downward trend of E fics in general vs the upward trend of proportionally more fics being tagged for Bottom HP interesting, but it’s definitely not the majority (May 2021 notwithstanding).  

Purely on a personal level, it was interesting to see the huge increase in sheer numbers of fics being written and posted to AO3, which is probably why I feel so overwhelmed haha.

caveat on the data: this is absolutely not a representative sample, nor is it random sample in any way. This does not account for all the fics that are not labeled but do have one dynamic or the other present but the idea of doing that data collection is absolutely fucking beyond me. So who knows what the actual numbers look like. This is simply an overview of how things are specifically tagged on AO3. In addition, this doesn’t take into any fics tagged solely by who tops.