#if you don't know me let me tell you that I refer to bananas as yellow fingers of satan

[puzzled-pegasus]

Here's some silly little metaphors that I think the dragon tribes would use

SkyWings

“Don’t count your clutch before they hatch.” (Don't plan too much too soon)

“Gold is better than silver, but silver is better than nothing.” (If you can't do it perfectly, still try your best. Most dragons forget the second part.)

“‘Sorry’ can't suck the fire back in.” (The damage is done and now you're dead to me.)

“You been eating too much burnt meat or something?” (Are you nuts?)

“Stop all this smoke and use your fire.” (Stop rambling and get to the point already; or stop complaining and do something)

“Doesn't know his tail from his wings.” (Stupid or clumsy)

“You fly like a depressed pigeon.” (Slow flier)

“There's no fire in a rainstorm.” (Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get to work.)

“Nighttime is for the NightWings.” (What are you doing up? Go to sleep.)

SandWings

“She’s all rattle, and no strike.” (Like all bark no bite)

“A diamond in a pile of quartz.” (Like a needle in a haystack)

“You’re watering the cactus and ignoring the sapling.” (You’re focusing on the wrong thing; barking up the wrong tree)

“Everyone thinks the camel looks silly until the dry season comes.” (Don't listen to them, they don't know how unique and strong you are)

MudWings

“Crocodile tears.” (Fake crying in order to gain sympathy)

“You can only catch a trout if your mouth is open.” (Be open to new experiences)

“If the tree gives away too much, it ends up as a stump.” (Don't let people take advantage of your generosity)

SeaWings

“Happy as a clam in high water.” (Very happy)

“The flying fish feels like a fool when it sees an osprey.” (Don't compare yourself to others, run your own race.)

“Plenty of fish in the sea.” (Plenty more opportunities to come.)

“You’ve got ink in your eyes.” (You're blind to something important)

“Lobsters only die when they don't leave their shell.” (Keep yourself busy with new experiences and you'll life a long life)

NightWings

“Sleep is for the dead.” (Why waste your time sleeping when you could be productive)

“SeaWings know their fish and SandWings know their cactuses, but we NightWings know everything else.”(NightWing supremacy propaganda)

“Being nice to a deer never got one in my mouth.” (Other dragons don't matter, only your goals.)

“A prophecy always comes true.” (I told you so but more cryptic)

"You're counting the stars." (You're doing something tedious towards an unachievable goal)

RainWings

“Gray’s her favorite color.” (She's a huge bummer)

“A lemon is yellow on the outside, doesn't mean they're not sour.” (Referring to someone who is two faced or fake)

“I love honey, but I’d rather not get stung by the bees.” (I could do this, but it requires effort so I don't wanna)

“Nobody likes a rotten banana.” (Nobody likes a bummer/downer)

“Don't tie your tail in a knot” (don't get all upset)

“I have all my berries in a basket” (I have everything sorted out)

“You couldn't sneak up on a pineapple” (insult to one's camouflage skills, popular among children)

IceWings

“The seal who asks why the orca is chasing him is the first to get eaten.” (A favorite of parents telling their kids to shut up)

“Not the sharpest icicle on the roof” (kinda stupid or slow)

“Clear as polished ice” (i understand or see it very well)

“You're looking a little pink in the face” (you look sickly. IceWings can turn pink from eating too much krill; a symptom of malnutrition. This line can be applied to any illness.)

“Blue blood kills, red blood spills.” (Patriotic propaganda implying that IceWings win every fight

“The SkyWings toss their blue eyed hatchlings because they're worried they'll be as strong as an IceWing.” (More propaganda)

HiveWings

“Pretty is for the SilkWings.” (Vanity is stupid and impractical)

“If it buzzes like a bug and bites like a bug, it's a bug.” (Don't ignore the obvious)

“Clearsight works in mysterious ways.” (I don't know the answer to your question, now go away)

SilkWings

“It's not always good to know how the honey gets made.” (Don't stick your snout where it doesn't belong)

“She's got a couple of threads loose.” (Calling someone a little crazy, threads refers to weaving)

“The bee minds its flowers and the spider minds her silk, it's when they mix that bad things happen.” (Mind ya business)

LeafWings

“Flytraps only trap because the soil doesn't feed them.” (Dragons don't get angry out of nowhere)

“Looking like a leaf only hides you in the forest.” (Time and place)

“If a branch doesn't bend, it breaks.” (Be flexible)

“Even the corpse flower attracts the flies.” (Even someone who seems ugly to one dragon they can seem irresistible to another)

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Laurence Olivier (Hamlet, Rebecca, Pride and Prejudice)—Any reference article will tell you that he's one of the finest stage actors of the 20th century and (arguably) contributed to transforming the landscape of live theater in the Anglophone world. But this is the Tumblr hot men poll, where it is arguably more important to know that he was an incredibly charming bi disaster who eye-fucked Vivien Leigh so conspicuously that everyone talked about it, both before and after their marriage. I do not have words for how hot this man was. I once sat under a portrait of him in black velvet and tights in the NPG cafeteria, and let me tell you I remember that so much better than my sandwich. I listened to a recording of him as Coriolanus on stage and got full-body chills. I photographed his copy of Richard III in the Folger Shakespeare Library for the sake of seeing his handwriting and his thoughts. ...okay, so I may have a problem, but the point is. So hot. And delivered one of the iconic pre-1970 lines about bisexuality on film ("oysters *and* snails," Spartacus 1963.)

Harry Belafonte (Carmen Jones, Island in the Sun)—one of my favorite things in the world when I'm sad is kicking back and listening to him and Danny Kaye singing "Hava Nagila" together. Or who can forget this man singing the Banana Boat song with the Muppets?? immensely talented, a powerful fighter for civil rights and humanitarian causes his whole life, if you have any remaining doubts PLEASE look at the following pics [clips and pics attached below]

This is round 3 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut]

Harry Belafonte propaganda:

"Now let me say this about the songs of the Caribbean - almost all black music is deeply rooted in metaphor. The only way that we could speak to the pain and anguish of our experiences was often through how we codified our stories in the songs that we sang. And when I sing the 'Banana Boat Song,' the song is a work song. It's about men who sweat all day long, and they are underpaid, and they're begging the tallyman to come and give them an honest count - counting the bananas that I've picked, so I can be paid. And sometimes, when they couldn't get money, they'll give them a drink of rum. There's a lyric in the song that says, 'Work all night on a drink of rum.' People sing and delight and dance and love it, but they don't really understand unless they study the song that they're singing a work song, a song of rebellion." -Harry Belafonte

Laurence Olivier propaganda:

"THEE actor man. You can't take theater classes and not know about this man. THEE Hamlet. Look at this lil blondie. VERY talented. (we are ignoring him also playing Othello, no he should not have done that) He was a pretty baby"

[bitletsanddrabbles]

But What If I Wasn't Rich?

Right. So. With revisions on Stolen Child going well, I've tried to start gearing up for my next big project, which is what I'd planned on working on this month. It's a very different tone - lots of zany hijinks with a group of idiots going through the jungles of India looking for biologically impossible flora - so I figured it shouldn't need too much in the way of research, especially since I'm avoiding politics like the plague. Don't know how much I'll manage, mind, since the only reason I can think of for Thomas's cousin to be in Bombay is military, but I'm pretty confident I can just say that and let my historically well informed audience fill in their own blanks while I concentrate on more important things, like cobras that spit hydrochloride acid at people*.

For all of that, though, I am having problems right off the bat with the research. Why? Because I need to get a disgraced-with-no-reference Thomas from Downton Abbey to Bombay, and I need to do it via a land route (or mostly at any rate), because he needs to start the whole thing off by crashing into someone in a train station. I suppose it could technically be at a port, but the train station just seems more likely given that the person in question is trying to get to the Congo.

This should not be difficult to figure out, right? A couple of Google** searches and you're done.

Well, not so much. When I search for how to get from England to India in 1920, the search engines seem to think I'm curious about immigration in the late 1800s. The closest I've come is an article that outlines the sea route around Cape Horn that was utilized the early 1900s...and stops there.

There was one (1) Reddit thread that popped up from someone with a similar problem who had the route mostly mapped but was just missing a bit in the middle. It started with the Orient Express.

Okay! Time to look up the Orient Express! And we get...

An absolute ton of information on the very big, very famous luxury liner of trains! Yes'sir, the Orient Express got you from Paris to Istanbul in style like you wouldn't believe! All of the rich people were lining up to bask in the lap of luxury as they made this cross land trip!

...

...which was probably beyond the budget of a newly sacked valet...

Pretty certain.

So we start looking for other ways to get from Paris to Istanbul in 1920 and apparently you could...walk? Or something? Maybe hitch hike?

Yeah, there's nothing. I can not come up with a search that does not tell me about the Orient Express, but unless Thomas ties himself to the roof, I don't see him getting aboard that one.

So! Are there any travel experts out there who have insight? Or people who have faced this issue in their fanfiction? Researchers with a hyper fixation on Agatha Christie? Banana cream pie? I'm kinda hungry, I could go in for some banana cream pie.

Heck, I'd settle for a less politically volatile reason for Thomas's cousin to be in residence, although I'm going to have to at least touch on the BEF*** for plot reasons.

*our fauna is as biologically impossible as our fauna

**or, well, Duckduckgo, but that doesn't roll off the tongue as nicely

***at least I assume that's who was stationed there. Again really, really not interested in politics. At all. Ever. Plague on the planet.

[melbatron5000]

The fruit of the tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil

When Gabriel first arrives to Whickber street, a truckful of tomatoes dumps its load at his feet, he even squishes one and almost trips.

@scottishmushroom asked what this means in this post here, and I have some thoughts.

Every scene in this show is doing double duty, every image has symbolism attached to it. The symbolism needs to either be funny, or serve the narrative somehow (often both). And this season is lousy with Clues.

What twigged me to my thought was the further note that there seem to be baskets of tomatoes in the Job minisode. They seem to be a throwaway prop, except that they are placed exactly between Aziraphale and Crowley in the shot they appear in. The placement of objects matters, as it tells the audience what's important, whose POV we're seeing through, etc.

(Oh, hey! I just noticed that the plants in the shot with the pomegranates appear to be dracaena trifasciata -- common names include mother-in-law's tongue, SNAKE plant, and DEVIL'S TONGUE. Native to Nigeria, so not out of place here. I have a six-foot one of those in my sunroom! Hm!)

Back to the tomatoes.

Tomatoes in the Middle East during Bibical times? @docdust pointed out that those aren't tomatoes, they're pomegranates.

Aha.

Tomatoes used to be called "love apples" back in the day, and the Greeks referred to pomegranates as "grainy apples."

Apples, Bible, something something Eve ate something . . .

Eve ate of the fruit of the tree of knowledge, then offered the fruit to Adam who also ate it. Then both were cast out of Eden, because God was worried they would also eat of the tree of eternal life and elevate themselves to Her own status. (That part of the story gets left out a lot, I wonder why . . . )

There's actually no Biblical reference that we know of to any particular fruit. Some translator at some point labelled it an apple, and it's been thought of that way ever since. But apples weren't found in the Middle East during Biblical times, either, so it's unlikely it was actually an apple Eve ate. Pick a fruit to stand in, any fruit.

(In the TV series Lucifer, Eve jokes that it was always a metaphor, there never was a "fruit" of any kind. Unless maybe a banana? (She grins at Lucifer.) But I digress.)

So pick a fruit to stand in for apples. Maybe a tomato (love apple)? Or a pomegranate (grainy apple)?

In both scenes where these fruits appear, important characters are having a big crisis of faith. In both cases, their first crisis of faith. They are learning that Heaven isn't what it's cracked up to be. Gabriel has eaten of the fruit of the tree of knowledge, and has been cast out of Eden (Heaven). (Though we don't know that yet when he first shows up -- the tomatoes are A Clue!)

Aziraphale has eaten of the tree of knowledge and been cast out of Eden -- though in his case, Eden is simply naivete, his ability to go along with Heaven unquestioningly. ("What am I?")

Aziraphale's crisis of faith seems more clear -- even my bestie, while watching the show with me, got kind of upset at the Job minisode because of her own religious trauma. Job is touchy story for a lot of people. It's an appropriate place for Aziraphale to lose his confidence that Heaven is light and truth and good. It's a story that a lot of people lose faith over.

And Crowley, in this instance, is Eve. The one who's already tasted the fruit, and is offering it their partner. "Let me show you what you don't even know."

And so we have "apples" present at the moment of both characters gaining knowledge of good and evil. Or at least, gaining knowledge that Heaven isn't Good, and going against Heaven isn't Evil.

That's my take on it, anyway, and how I would interpret the symbolism of those two fruits present at that those two points in the narrative. Your mileage may vary.

[matthias-the-tulip]

my updated list of parts i hope they keep in the red, white & royal blue movie

(updated after i reread it in a day) (a lot of these are just funny lines that add absolutely nothing to the plot but they make me laugh)

• the MAGAZINE 😭

• “he has the personality of a cabbage.”

• “i want to hear you gush like he's your fucking prom date.”

• alex makes a long loud fart noise


• “i'm going to throw up on you” at the stables (doesn't look like they're at a stables in the trailer 😒)

• “i'd rather be waterboarded” also at the stables (again, doesn't look like they're at a stables)

• “i bet he has a secret lovechild,” nora says. “or he's gay. or he has a secret gay lovechild.”

“it's probably in case i see his equerry putting his batteries back in,” alex says.

• midnight ice cream on instagram

• “i didn't know you wore glasses.” (henry's wearing a suit not pyjamas and alex is not wearing glasses what's that all about!)

• awkward fist bump on “this morning” (does not look like it’s a chat show in the trailer but also would a royal even go on this morning)

• star wars stan henry 🥹

• “not impressed, just surprised.”

“at what?”

“that you actually have, you know, feelings.”

• henry is beginning to smile…

• “do you MIND?” in the cupboard at the hospital

• “you're not the prince of me” 😭

• “i'd rather not be the little spoon.”

• henry's feet in a mop bucket

• “locked in a cupboard with your elbow inside my rib cage.”

• “i cannot believe even mortal peril will not prevent you from being the way you are.”

• “are you psychoanalysing me? i don't think royal guests are allowed to do that.”

• “is that the time you threatened to push me into the thames?”

• “no booty calls.”

• “it was like you were trying to set him on fire with your mind.”

• june's (nora now i guess 😟) plot to murder woody allen

• “don't let the papers print lies about me after i've garroted myself with my tie.”

• “you are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life.”

• “yes, famously the most sinister of all animal sounds, the gobble.”

• “cornbread knows my sins.”

• the whole turkey situation really

• “buy a summer home in majorca with the turkey”

• MR WOBBLES

• “jabba” cakes.

• henry watching bake off

• “you're jeff goldblum”

• “yo there's a bond marathon on and did you know your dad was a total babe”.

“I BEG YOU TO NOT”

• “it sounds like you did your best.” 🥹

• the new year’s party being referred to as “the legendary balls-out bananas white house trio new year's eve party” (white house duo now 😭)

• “please do not attempt to steal my shine. you will fail and i will be embarrassed for you.”

• “says prince fucking charming.”

• get low playing at the new year’s eve party

• alex’s reaction to get low playing at the new year’s eve party

• “christ, you are as thick as it gets.”

• alex falling while running with june (nora now i guess 😟) cause he was thinking about henry

• “he's gay and you're hot, so.”

• “still waters, deep dicking.”

• “prince henry is a biscuit,” nora says,
“let him sop you up.”

• they know each other's sleep schedule and alex gets in a bad mood when he doesn't talk to him 🥹

• “you're not going to kill him, are you?” she says.
“probably not,” alex tells her

• “shut up, shut all the way up, oh my
god”

• alex pushing henry up against a wall!

• “i mean, er, should we, i dunno, slow down?”henry says, cringing so hard at himself that one eye closes. “go for dinner first, or-“

• hooking one knee around the back of alex's thigh 😉

• ”i'm going to die,” henry says helplessly.

“i'm going to kill you,” alex tells him.

“yes, you are,” henry agrees.

• alex fixing his hair for him 😢😢😢

• henry singing god save the queen (king i guess) to make his 🍆 go away

• “i am going to do very bad things to you, and if you fucking ghost me again, i’m going to get you put on a fucking no-fly list. got it?”

• “you were jealous,” alex says. “you want me.”

• henry calling alex bossy 😂

• alex literally just insulting henry while he’s going to town on him

• “do you ever stop talking?” henry says. “such a mouth on you.”

• “hi,” he says, when he reaches henry’s eye level.

“hello,” henry says back.

“i’m gonna take your pants off now,” alex tells him.

“yes, good, carry on.”

• fucking eyelashes

• when he's done, he presses a sticky kiss in the crease of alex's leg where he'd slung it over his shoulder

• the mattress shifts, and henry moves up to the pillows, nuzzling his face into the hollow of alex's throat. alex makes a vague noise of approval, and his arms fumble around henry's waist, but he's helpless to do much else.

• the tip of henry’s nose catching on alex’s

• “for fuck’s sake, man, you just had my dick in your mouth, you can kiss me goodnight.”

• monocles for babies 😂

• “i don’t like that look,” amy says. “you look…sweaty.”

• “what in the rich-white-people-sex-dungeon hell?”

• the whole polo kit situation. henry slowly putting his boot back on the floor

• “i’ve thrown men in the dungeons for less.”

“hey, don’t threaten me with a good time.”

• paris!!! leaving directions to the cheese

• “you're a mad, spiteful, unmitigated demon, and I'm going to kiss you until you forget how to talk.”

• birthday floggings et al and the buttercream!

• alex’s heart going weird at henry on the boat and having to put his head in his hands

• “i don't give a damn what joanne has to say, remus john lupin is gay as the day is long, and i won't hear a word against it.”

• “i will staple your dick to the inside of your leg”

• “i did get both of the gay kings.”

• “deflowering the darling of the republic.”

• “i'm not ... historically great at talking about things,” henry says.

“well, i wasn't historically great at blowjobs, but we all gotta learn and grow, sweetheart.”

“wasn't?"

“hey,” alex huffs. “are you trying to say i'm still not good at them?”

“no, no, i wouldn't dream of it,” henry says, and alex can hear the small smile in his voice. “it was just the first one that was.. well. it was enthusiastic, at least.”

“i don't remember you complaining…”

“yes, well, i'd only been fantasizing about it for ages.”

• baby. (!!!)

• “i miss you,” alex says before he can stop himself. he instantly regrets it, but henry says, “i miss you too.”

• “i want to ... put my fingers in his mouth...” she moans, sounding horrified.

• just the whole karaoke bar situation. plz. toilet stall hookup!

• “bisexuality is truly a rich and complex tapestry.”

• o captain, my captain

• “if only you had known the mighty work of thine loins would be undone by a gay heir who likes it when american boys with chin dimples are mean to him.”

• the fruity truth: my favourite english author is jane austen.

• “when at wimbledon”

• “i want to see a cage match between your grandmother (grandfather i guess) and this fucking ghoul running against my mom”

• “and you are good. most things are awful most of the time, but you're good.”

• “he is truly a picture, wearing an expression of bewildered panic and absolutely nothing else.”

• “jesus tits”

• henry falling out of the wardrobe and just. sitting on the floor. (zahra finds him in the wardrobe instead :()

• “i thought you were getting into international relations or something.”

“i mean, technically-“

• “you're literally putting your dick in the leader of a foreign state, who is a man, at the biggest political event before the election, in a hotel full of reporters, in a city full of cameras, in a race close enough to fucking hinge on some bullshit like this, like a manifestation of my fucking stress dreams, and you're asking me not to tell the president about it?”

• all of zahra's quips tbh - “every time i see you, it takes another year off my life.” - “ask me if i'm afraid of the crown.”

• SEXUAL EXPERIMENTATION WITH
FOREIGN MONARCHS: A GRAY AREA.

• EXPLORING YOUR SEXUALITY: HEALTHY, BUT DOES IT HAVE TO BE WITH THE PRINCE OF ENGLAND?

• FEDERAL FUNDING, TRAVEL EXPENSES, BOOTY CALLS, AND YOU

• history, huh? bet we could make some. (the emails plz like i need at least some of them read aloud over a montage or something)

• “some saucy tart once tried to impugn my virtue against an oil painting of him, and in the halls of memory, some things demand context.”

• I GUESS THAT MAKES YOU. THE MF. NORTH STAR.

• “i thought you might need to, like, have a catholic moment about this or something?” 😭

• “santa maria is watching!”

• skinny dipping!!!

• “philip is the heir and i'm the spare, and if that nervy bastard has a heart attack at thirty-five and i've got malaria, whither the spare?”

• alex's meltdown outside kensington. very important. - “how 'bout i just keep yelling and we see which of the papers show up first!” he turns back to the window and starts flailing his arms too. “henry! your royal fucking highness!”

• “jesus, could you stop being an obtuse fucking asshole for, like, twenty seconds?”

• “i fucking love you, okay?” alex half yells, finally, irreversibly.

• “what do you want?”

“i want you-”

“then fucking have me.”

“-but i don’t want this.”

• “a whole lifetime of fine. that’s not good enough for me.”

• henry nuzzling his nose behind alex's ear.

• alex laughs and grabs his head and aggressively kisses his cheek, smashing his face into the pillow.

• “next time we shall visit some of the george Ill pieces and see if they burst into flame.”

• DANCING TO YOUR SONG IN THE MUSEUM

• “i completely fucking love you” and the ring and the chain

• “once shaan managed to dislodge him from the chandelier”

• henry’s email about memories and grief and the first time he saw alex

• “jesus, be a gay beard”

• henry and alex in the car after the fake date

• “i will physically fight your grandmother (grandfather i guess) myself if i have to, okay? and, like, she's (he’s) old. i know i can take her (him).”

“i wouldn't be so cocky,” henry says with a small laugh. “she's (he’s)full of dark surprises.”

• “your spine's a ridge i'd die climbing”

• “check the fucking news, you horny little miscreant”

• “it’s about to be gay DEFCON five in this administration.”

• “then fuck it.”

• the big group hug

• oscar saying “give ‘em hell.”

• “you're my mean friend.”

• “jumping off cliffs is kinda my thing”

• I 😭 LOVE 😭 HIM 😭 ON 😭PURPOSE 😭 they can't leave that out if they do i'll kill someone

• “what are we even defending here, philip? what kind of legacy? what kind of family, that says, we'll take the murder, we'll take the raping and pillaging and the colonizing, we'll scrub it up nice and neat in a museum, but oh no, you're a bloody poof? that's beyond our sense of decorum! i've bloody well had it. i've sat about long enough letting you and gran and the weight of the damned world keep me pinned, and i'm finished. i don't care. you can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse, philip. i'm done.”

• “for what it's worth,” he says to philip, “that is the bravest son of a bitch i’ve ever met.”

• “we banged it out last night” + high five

• “i've been gay as a maypole since the day i came out of mum, philip.”

• all the support for them 🥹

• bea pouring the tea on philip's lap

• “you know, i think all that cocaine i did must’ve really done a job on my reflexes!”

• henry pulls alex close and kisses him, whispers, "i love you i love you i love you."

• never 😭 tell 😭 me 😭 the 😭 odds 😭

• “my life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person”

• “you are the absolute worst idea i’ve ever had”

• “listen, you've had your first big sex scandal. no more sitting at the kids' table.”

• how to love each other in plain sight

• “holding henry’s hand atop his own knee” in the portrait

• “all this fundraising for sobriety is going to drive me to drink”

• “i'm the prince of...here” 😭

• “you spent a month of your gap year talking to yaks in mongolia, h.”

• “i know it's a lot, but you give people hope. so, get back out there and be alex.”

• the super six 😭 (fantastic five now i guess)

• the picture of them on the cover of the magazine

• henry fixing june's hair 🥹 (NORA NOW I GUESS 😟)

[yoon-topias]

Yoontopia | Chapter 3 {Dresses and touches}

⟡ Warnings: Strong language, depression, mental health issues, references to self harm, references to violence, references to sexual assault, manic episodes, smoking, risky behavior, jealousy, smut.

⟡ 18+ (minors DNI, some chapters have mature content)

⟡ Best friend's older brother x OC

⟡ Summary: When dress shopping turns into more than just shopping in a dress room where Yoongi pushes boundaries.

⟡5.9k words

Violet Pov:

Getting off work today Yoongi is taking me to go shopping for the dress. Shopping is a pain in the ass let alone being curvy. Everyone stares and nothing looks how it's meant to on my body. I pack my bag up, take off my heels, slide on my boots, a suit and boots yeah that totally looks okay, not. Yoongi has seen me at my worst anyways, there is always this comfortability with him. I don't have to act nor do I have to put up a front. Whatever I'm feeling is what I feel and he accepts it. As I'm about to leave, of course the goons have something to say.

"You going out with that guy again, violet you could do better don't you think?"

"I bet he is using you as a safe goat if he ever gets caught"

That's it they pissed me off, walking up to one of them and sticking my finger in his chest "you know what, Mark you're only saying that because you're friends with Jackson. So what if he makes me happy and actually fucking appreciates me huh? Someone who is a better man than Jackson ever was. So how about you fuck off and let me live, Yoongi brings out the best in me and makes me feel things that Jackson could never. I may be a little selfish, because I wanna keep him to myself but just a little longer and I'll set him free so for fucking once Mark leave me the fuck alone."

They are standing there in shock and slowly back off from me. Fixing my black coat and zipping it up since it can get cold with the wind riding, but what Vi didn't see was Min Yoongi standing there around the corner coming to get you. He wanted to help you hold your bag, make sure you didn't forget and worked late. He doesn't know what you think. You practically confessed your love for him to someone else, but why couldn't you do it to him, and set him free. What does that mean?

He turns around and goes around the hall so you don't see he heard it all, yeah play it cool Yoongi you can ask her later enjoy the time with her while you have it because it can all fall apart in seconds for all he knows. Fixing your coat, grabbing your bag and starting to walk down the hall and needing to say bye to the security guard you always make sure to bring him his banana milk. "Bye Kook, have a good shift." He is a closing shift guard so you get him as he wakes up for the day so at lunchtime you bring him banana milk he loves. "Bye violet, thanks for the drink again. How do I ever repay you?"

Turning to look at him and give him a smile "I don't need repayment Kook, everyone needs someone watching out for them" and you turn on your heels, walking out the door the sun is out shining bright you haven't seen sunlight all day been stuck on research for a case. It's going to be a nice day to be on the bike to get some sun and just feel alive. Smiling as you see Yoongi's bike parked, but no Yoongi now where could that man have gone. He can't go far lost in thought, your brows crease. He is around the corner planning to grab you, scare you always been an easy scare. As you pull out your phone to call him he jumps out and wraps his arms around you from behind.

"Vi, you ready to go try on dresses?" He goes to your ear like he's telling you a secret "I'm gonna need a fix though, because I won't be able to handle seeing you all dressed up. I  nearly died when you went to prom" turning your head to look at him your eyes go wide as you see the gummy smile he has on.

"Yoon do you mean that? Why didn't you say anything at prom?" blinking at him and you can see his throat do a gulp.  "Well you know you and Hans banned Ma, Pop, and me from saying anything how y'all looked also didn't wanna come off the wrong way to the others Violet'' he shrugs as he looks away from my face he has a slight tinge of red to his cheeks. Cute.

"Well thank you Yoon, but next time you better tell me because that night I felt so ugly even though I was dressed up, but standing next to Hans I knew I wouldn't compare and who had a date? Hans and I was the third wheel"

"You know Vi, I wanted to ask you as friends of course but being already graduated. Also your best friend's brother. I didn't wanna push boundaries. I wished I maned up and asked you cause to spend that night with would have been a fucking dream."

Humming in response not finding words to respond with after he just said turning to him and giving him a hug "Well looks like we'll have a do over Min Yoongi. Let's go shopping"

Pulling away looking at him in the eyes and I see a spark flash in them "I need my fix Vi." Reaching into my pocket and grabbing a lollipop, unwrapping, putting it in my mouth, and running down the stairs. "Looks like you're gonna have to steal it." Yelling as I go down the stairs.

"Vi I swear if you fall and hurt yourself there's no remorse coming from me, you clumsy ass!" he is starting to try and catch up to me getting to the bottom of the stairs before he does and I stare up at him as I take a seat on his bike and pull my lollipop out crossing my arms.

"What took you so long Yoon? Gotta get the dress shopping done so we can make it to the aquarium remember case is closed I won. " giving him a smirk popping the lollipop back in and he rolls his eyes at me.

Yoongi Pov:

This woman will be the death of me. She is in a suit and on my bike waiting for me and I wish I would just go between her legs, grab her face and finally kiss her. Min Yoongi you are just the best friends brother get your mind out of the gutter. "Oh yeah, Vi looks like we gotta find the perfect one for you, then we gotta tell Lewis you won so you can buy him all his lettuce huh?" She nods her head and smile with that fucking lollipop.

Sweet. Sweet. Pineapple.

Taking my backpack off to get her helmet out, my bag left mine on her seat. She is looking at me tapping her thighs god those thick thighs. Stop. Yoongi. Zipping my backpack, I intentionally put nothing else in it, grabbing her bag, shoving it into my backpack, setting it next to the bike. I walk up to her and tap her chin to look up at me. She blinks at me with that fucking lollipop.

"Vi you can't have a lollipop in your mouth you know that" she shrugs and blinks at me. "Looks like you'll have to steal it Yoon" I take a deep breath and take everything in me to not lose the control I have had for so long. I bend down to her ear and risk what I'm saying. "Looks like I'll just have to take it then from a bad girl, and bad girls don't get what they want huh?" She turns her head slightly, shakes her head no understanding and her lips part and I reach for the lollipop stick and pop it in my mouth.

Sweet. Sweet. Pineapple.

She looks at me like I just did something she never expected. "Violet, you know it's bad to leave your mouth open." Tapping her chin, she just slowly closes her mouth.  I put her helmet on her, buckle it for her making sure it's tight enough, the shield is open. I see her wide gray eyes staring at my every movement. God her eyes pull me in and take me to my utopia with those silk sheets over our bodies. She's not just laying next to me but she is on top of my lap and looking at me in my eyes. We could be talking, joking around, or fucking and those eyes will be my weakness. Two of those I can do on a regular occurrence but the other? No it'll never happen and that Vi will live in my utopia in the home she has built there. Her home, it's not mine anymore.

When I get done I bite down on the lollipop, take the stick out and toss it on the ground looking her in the eyes "I'ma need another one later Vi later, but time to go. It's time for my backpack to be behind me" Nodding her head and I push the face shield down, putting the backpack straps over her arms. She stands up. I swing my leg over, putting my arm out for her to grab onto. She swings her leg over, putting her feet on the pegs, scoots down and attaches herself to me. She wraps her arms around me and intertwines her fingers.

I start my bike and give her thigh a tight squeeze

"You ready, Vi. You're gonna look like a fucking goddess" kicking the stand and rev my bike and take off, turning the volume up already having her playlist playing since I was listening to it already. "Yoon you already have it playing. Look what I'm doing to you"

God does she know what she is doing to me.

We have a decently long ride to get to the mall, that just means I get to have her wrapped around me longer.

Violet Pov:

"Hey Yoon you think they'll have something for me" there is nothing ahead of us yet I find his hand making its way to my thigh, his thumb rubbing in circles those black leather gloves. I don't know why But they stir up those butterflies in my stomach. "Violet, sweets they will have the perfect dress for you that will fit all your curves and make you feel like a thousand words.''

Trying to remove your hand and he takes his hand away from your thigh, he  places his hand over your hands on his stomach.  "No. Violet safety."

"Okay, Yoon I just wanted to hold your hand"

"Oh so you admit it this time, well then here Vi."

He grabs your hand from on top and locks his hand on top so if he needs to use his hand he can quickly take it away. Feeling my cheeks turn red thank god for the helmet, looking at the cars passing by you wish you could see him again like when you would ride behind Hana. "You think Hana would be mad at us? You know being close?"

He squeezes my hand and releases it as he goes to tap my knee to turn left, bracing and leaning my body with him. "Ya know she always said, if she could have you a part of the family she would. Doesn't matter what way that happened."

"What do you mean Yoon, you wanna marry me now?"

"I mean I already know how you taste might as well make you family. Hold on Vi let's have some fun"

He down shifts and takes off on an open bridge, you tighten your thighs and arms and make a scream "I'm gonna get married"

"That you are Vi, one day" he laughs and continues to go as fast. At this moment it feels like it's just us on the road, no one else.  He squeezes my right thigh "hard right Vi" and as he follows through with the turn you hold on like never before. Maybe you could get used to this with him.

Hell do you even need a bike anymore?

Was that crush you made yourself push deep down worth it now?

Yoongi Pov:

Grabbing and squeezing her knee one more time as we pull into the mall to go shopping, she squeezes a little tighter today. This banter we have goin' on I can't read too much into it. I can't let myself fall and stumble I have came too far and even if that means loving her from a distance and just have some fun I will. We pull into a spot and kick the stand, putting my arm out for her to swing her leg over and get off. She comes and stands in front of me waiting for me to take her helmet off. I get off my bike, take my  helmet off and smooth out my hair. She comes and sits on my seat as I set my helmet on her spot.

Tapping her chin "Look up at me, Vi" she tilts her head up unbuckling her helmet, taking it off her head, and smoothing out her hair for her. "There you go pretty"

Her mouth parts and she looks at me like she is in shock I called her pretty. "Vi, you know you're gorgeous right? I have always thought that since the first time I laid my eyes on you." she shakes her head at me "You never said Yoon."

"But didn't my actions ever show you, silly?" She looks at me confused, her brows crease looking for an answer in her head.  Stepping forward as she sits on my seat putting myself in between her thighs as she bites her lip nervously. Fuck hold it together Yoongi. 

"Violet look at me right now" she locks eyes with me, those gray eyes staring back at me searching for answers she has never noticed. I'm going to lay them all out for her. 

"Violet Rose. Did you ever notice how I would literally stare at you anytime you were in our house. when you learned how to backpack, how I was insistent you ride with me because I didn't want no guy to think they could have you, how I literally called you princess all of middle school? Huh? You think it was just to bother you Violet? No it was because your beauty is otherworldly. You hear me Violet. I want you to say it back tell me. Tell me you're beautiful"

Grabbing her hips, pulling her off my bike, Putting my fingers under her chin to look at me. She is blinking at me in shock. I know I said too much may have gone too far, but I can't stand and watch her not love herself. "Y-you said my middle name you never use it Yoon"

"I'm waiting, Violet Rose."

"I- I'm b-beautiful."

"See, was that so hard, Vi?"

Nodding her head "Yeah, it was everyone besides you and Hans told me I was ugly Yoon."

Placing my hand on her cheek and rubbing up and down. "Well maybe that's cause' we're the only ones who matter. We see you for you. Now let's go get you that dress. I know that body of yours has changed and I'm ready to see it in all of its glory"

"You sure Yoon? Cause' I have done my own damage to my body"

"Vi what do you mean, huh?"

"I guess, You'll see Yoon."

"So help me god Violet, if it's what I think you're gonna see another side of me" she places her hand on top of the hand that's on her cheek and pulls it down. "Promise me, no pinky promise you won't see me different" she is holding out her other pinky waiting for me to kiss, accept it.

"Violet Rose I'll never see you differently you're still the same girl I met all those years, from my sister who never left me alone. I accepted it. I Accepted you the day I met you. You are in my life for a reason."

Holding out my pinky to her not knowing what I'm committing to, but with her I'll walk to hell and back on my knees. Locking our pinkies together looking her in the eyes and placing a kiss on my pinky as she does after me and stamping out thumbs together.

"Pinky"

"Swear"

"Time to go shopping, Vi. You ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be Yoon"

I grab the backpack from her and place her Helmet inside. Choosing to leave mine on the bike if it's stolen I don't care as long as she has a helmet that's what matters. I hold my hand for her to walk into the mall. I see her chest rising up and down. Why would dress shopping be so nerve wracking I know it's hard for her to find sizing which is honestly fucking bullshit it's a body it shouldn't be ashamed, left out but that's another topic. She wraps her whole fist around my pointer finger.

Something about her being small makes me smile, yeah we are crossing some boundaries, but maybe it's time to do it. It's been over twelve years in the making. It's time I need to step up to the plate and take the risk. As we walk into the mall she is by my side and I see the nervous little girl who would walk into her homeroom class looking back at me like she was going into hell after I encouraged her each and every year to just take the first step into class if she wasn't with Hans. I'm going to make this the best shopping trip she has ever had.

"How about we go get a snack, Vi?" Looking down at her. She smiles and hums in response.

"Smoothies Yoon!"

"Yeah we can get smoothies bubs."

Violet Pov:

Walking into the store we both have smoothies. We both got orange, mango, and pineapple.  There are dresses lined everywhere. I start to look where my sizing is always the smallest section. Hopefully they have something either black or white since it's black and white theme. "Yoon, do you have your outfit?"

"Don't worry about me Kay? Today is for you" what you didn't know was that the night he came home he called Jin on his way home, told him about it and said he needed help and of course Jin called Hobi over  by the time he was home he was already there. They stayed up all night going through what Hobi brought and all the closets in the house to find the perfect outfit that is not a suit. He'll wear whatever, but a suit? No chance in hell unless vi asked it of him.

"Hey Yoon you go take a seat and I'll shop around okay?"

"Will that make you comfortable or are you saying that because you feel bad I'm here?"

Slowly holding out my hand with my index and middle finger out "Uh number two."

"Well then I'm staying."

Well that is Yoongi should've guessed it, stubborn as always.. I start looking at the dresses their is a small section and I see few dresses that would go with the theme already grabbing them off the rack without even checking what they look like since you know one of these you'll be stuck with, and as you grab the three dresses off the rack Yoongi's hand comes and take the hooks in your hand. "You will never carry your own stuff when you're with me Vi." your cheeks turn a light pink, you take a sip of your smoothie as he starts to walk to the dressing room area. He looks so comfortable doing this with you. How?

Going to an empty dressing room he walks in, hangs the dresses up for you. Looking at him as he comes to you. He is wearing something different than his normal all black. A pair of dark washed jeans, light  gray hoodie, a sweat shirt on top of it with some design on it and a black jacket. He always has to have his black jacket.  "Hey Yoon you can go look around at some other stores if you want"

He walks out the dressing room and look you dead in the eyes. "And what if I wanna be in this store you gonna kick me out, Vi?" He comes and gives you a hug.  You accept it yeah you backpack him a lot riding, but this feels different when he comes up to you to hug you,  wraps you up in his arms. He runs his hand through your hair and takes a deep breath, you can hear his heart beating fast. 

"Now I wanna see those dresses on you, Vi. Only if you let me." Nodding your head to him in his chest it feels nice to be close to him why? No, that stupid crush needs to be buried six feet under and never see light again.  "I'ma need a fix. You got another lollipop?"

Reluctantly unwrapping your arms around him reaching into your pocket, taking the lollipop and unwrapping it putting t it in your mouth. "I told you I'm a sugar addict Yoon."

Pineapple your favorite flavor.

He looks at you like you just stole his heart, his eyes flash, you see the glossy eyes he is staring at you with and he slowly steps forward. You back up with each step he takes, finding yourself against the wall. His hand finds its way to your hip. He looks down at you, yeah you have been close but like this? Never.  "Violet you know you can't take my lollipop" he slowly bends down to your ear "Do you wanna be forever on the back of my bike, because that can be arranged wife" lips parting looking at him and he takes the lollipop stick from you and pops it in his mouth.

Yoongi Pov:

Giving her hip a squeeze "Now go try on those dresses I'll be out here waiting. If there's one you don't want me to see then don't show me, but I know you'll look perfect in every one"

There is no chair so I squat and clasp my hands together waiting to see what she's gonna look like. I haven't seen her dressed up since prom and god did I go to heaven and back that night. "Ugh" I hear from the dressing room. "Vi, you good?" About to stand up to check on her but she speaks up as I'm about to "Just one will only work Yoon I should have looked at the sizes, but they were in the spot"

"That's okay Vi I'm sure it'll be perfect" I hear her sigh and I know it's tough on her, but if my only mission in life is to see her love her body I will. What Yoongi doesn't see in the dressing room is you're struggling with the zipper. You can't zip it up to the top, your arms are too short.

"Uh Yoon can you help with the z-zipper?"

Standing up to walk to the dressing room I hear the click of the door unlocking and as I open it she is standing there, hands covering her body as much as she can. God I can't even see the whole thing it's perfect. It hugs your waist, wrapping flawlessly around your body to show the road map that people will have to work for. That I need to work for. Pulling your arms down I need  a full view. Eyes searching and roaming all over your body, I want to picture you like this forever. Taking a few steps forward after I shut, lock the door behind me. How could anyone as beautiful as you could think you're a monstrosity you're fucking devine.

"Turn around, Vi please" she turns around as she does. I see her backside the way the dress hugs every point of her body,  just waiting for someone to learn the road map. "So beautiful" I whisper to myself. Stepping up to her she is staring at the corner to not look at herself in the mirror. I slide my fingers down her back and her skin gets goose bumps on her upper arms. Cute.

Grabbing a hold of the zipper and zipping it up to the top of her back.

"You're gorgeous, Vi"

"Stop, you're just saying it Yoon."

"I'm fucking serious Violet Rose" I pull her close to me and make her face the mirror,  run my hand down her arm. I see the blush to her cheeks, the pin prick goose bumps on her arms, the gaze trying to not look at herself. Trailing my eyes down her body, I see the slit and her hand trying to cover her thigh, pulling her hand away her soft skin is shown..I see something I never thought I'd see on her body scars.

What did she do...when...how long? Answers I need but right now I need to make feel like she is the most beautiful woman ever. We all fight our demons, I'm trying to fight hers and mine for both of us.

Putting my hand under her chin giving her a light tap, making her look at herself in the mirror. Our eyes lock in the mirror. I'm behind her in an intimate way, closer than I have been with her. Yeah she has been behind me but this right here is intimate before it was because we had to. I let go of her chin, eyes still locked, moving my other hand to her hip.

"Look at you, Violet.'' God she is gorgeous. Running my hand down her arms, brushing lightly down. Our hands meet, dancing with her fingers tapping. Breathe Yoongi dont show her you're freaking out slightly.

One. Two. Three. Four. Five.

She takes a breath and it brings me back a little bit.  I'm going to push this boundary to show her how gorgeous she is. Let her know I see now what she meant when she said to promise to not think of her differently. My finger skims from her fingertips to her hip, nudging my nose to her neck "Look how pretty you are, huh? I want you to say it." as my fingers get lower on her hip she sucks in as I get closer to the slit. "Yoon, you didn't see okay" looking at her in the eyes I can see the worry behind those wide gray eyes, but also a nervousness to them. If she was touching me in any way I'd be pushing it all down to hide what she is making me feel. My weaknesses aren't shown that easily, but I think she already has a gasp on being a weakness of mine.

"We'll talk about this later Violet, but right now I want you to see how beautiful you are" my fingers caress her thigh that is exposed rubbing circles on the scars that she did to herself. She is fighting some inner demons in front of me. I can see in those eyes the way her body is stiff.

"I- I'm beautiful" she left out a little laugh at the end not because it's funny but she can't believe she is saying it let alone have Yoongi behind her guiding her to love herself.

"That's it." giving her nod she did it. "Say it again, go on." She fixes her posture which only allows me to be closer to her.

"I'm beautiful" and at the end she makes a small smile looking at herself up and down. This is not how a friend nor a best friend's brother talks to someone, but right now I'm more than that. "Bout' time you see it, Vi."' Giving her thigh a squeeze is what she feels like when I give her a squeeze for a turn. I see the goose bumps spread to her forearms now. "Good job, Princess." Pressing a kiss to the back of her head "Did I make you uncomfortable, Vi? I never want to do that" she shakes her head no relief casts over both our bodies.

I'm playing with fire, and neither of us need to get burned. Well I can get burned, I'll accept my fate.

Giving her one last squeeze,  whispering in her ear. "It's the one Vi. Let's go get you a necklace to match" and as I'm about to step out I unzip the dress, unlock the door,  stepping out to the side shutting the door standing in front of it. I Rest my back on the door. My heart is beating out of my chest, catching up to me. What's wrong with me? I have always been good with girls. never panicked before. Taking a deep breath fuck I need a cig I'm getting an addicted. Knocking on the door "Vi I need a fix." I hear my heartbeat trying to take me out.  She hums in response, opening the door. She stands there with a dress in her arm,  a lollipop unwrapped waiting for me to take.

"I think You're getting addicted Yoon." 

"Oh you have no idea, Vi."

Taking the lollipop from her hand she bites her lip as I pop it in my mouth. I grab the dress from her arm turning on my heels to go pay for it,  she grabs my arm I turn around confused "You can't buy it Yoon. I make enough money."

"And what kind of second prom date would allow a queen to buy her dress? Huh?" Continuing to walk to the counter setting it down to pay she is in her pouting stage. I have seen it so much her bottom lip puckered out,  her brows crossed looking at me. After I pay, I take the bag off the counter. "Thank you, sir" nodding in response to the cashier. I don't have time to pay attention to anyone other than the girl behind me with her arms crossed like a child.

Violet Pov:

As we walk out the store I'm holding onto the straps of the bag he is too, these strings connecting us together like magnets. Yoongi is walking a little faster than me leading the way. I stop walking which in turn makes him stop turning back as we are both holding the bag.

"Hey what's up?"

"Did. Did you mean it Min Yoongi?" He steps up in front of me,  places his hand on my cheek as I look up to him. "Every single word, every single touch Violet Rose. Now let's go get you that jewelry"

He slowly lets go of my face and I see so much behind those eyes they tell a story I know he struggles,  just doesn't say. Walking into the store and looking at all the cases my finger skims over the glass like a child picking out a toy. Staring down at a pair of necklaces that have a little silver square on the end with two keys next to it. It looks like the couple type. It makes you push all those feelings down again, bury them six feet under, turn around and Yoongi is no longer standing behind you. Seeing him at the same case you were looking at with a sales lady.  "Can I just do some earrings Yoon?" he is talking to the sales lady, Just nods his head.

"Whatever you want, Vi." he smiles at me. Pointing to a pair of small silver hoops "These ones Yoon." he nods his head and tells the sales lady to ring them up.

"Now you go outside and wait."

"Why?"

"I know you'll die when you hear the price." of course you will even though you have a good salary you're still stuck on buying the cheapest things you can find or they have to be on sale to justify the purchase. Nodding your head, going out to the front sipping on the smoothie which is most gone, walking to the trash can taking the last few sips of it. "Did you forget about me?"

"Huh? No I just drank it all"

"Where's the bag? Were they too expensive, I knew it."

"No, Miss cheapskate, they are in my backpack. I didn't want anyone to try and steal the bag from my hand."

"Oh."

He takes hold of the strings on the bag again but this time locking our pinkies together holding the strong together. "Thank you, Yoon."

"Hey you have nothing to thank me for I'll always be here for you like I have always been since the day I met you."

The doors open to the exit of the mall and as we exit I shield my eyes from the sun. "Oh I can't wait to have my helmet on." Reaching into my pocket,  grabbing a lollipop, unwrapping it with one hand and popping it into my mouth. Okay I got an addiction, but at least it's not drugs.

Walking up to the bike I let his pinky go,  slow down and get behind him and start to unzip the Backpack but he stops me.

"I'll get it, Vi."

"Fine, don't let me help."

"Ya know its not that it's just don't want you to drop the jewelry bag miss clumsy."

FIne I give him that I'm so clumsy. He takes out my helmet, putting the backpack now on my shoulders since it's the only job he lets me do ever.  He takes the dress bag from my hand and places it very carefully into the bag and zips it up. "It's all good, now give me my fix." holding out his hand for me to give him a lollipop. I take out mine and hold it out for him, he doesn't reject it but leans in capturing in his mouth.

He taps my chin, placing the helmet on my head. I always find myself looking at him when he does it. His focus is on making sure it's right when I could easily do it myself, but he insists every time to do it for me. Once he is done I hear the crack of him biting down on the lollipop "I'm addicted to it, Vi."

"Huh?"

"To you. To pineapple" once he says that he shut the face shield and gives my head the shake to make sure it's on tight enough. He will be the end of me, but already I'm dead buried myself six feet under long ago.  He puts on his helmet,  gets on his bike holding  his arm out and I get on behind him. I get closer to him might as well push more boundaries, giving him a squeeze he hums in response to me "I think I may be addicted to the way you make me feel Min Yoongi"

"What?"

"Nothin' let's go tell Lewis momma made him money for his lettuce."

"Ya know I heard you, Vi."

"I'm sorry this helmet makes it hard to hear."

"You know damn well we have mics and speakers connected to each other, I'll let it pass this once."

He turns his bike,  gives me a squeeze, revs his bike and we're off to go to my happy place.

But my happy place is whenever I'm with him lately.

Thank you for reading. ₊˚⊹♡

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All rights belong to @/Yoon-Topias. Do not copy/ translate.

[fractualized]

In this installment of I Finally Read the Thing: I finally read Punisher/Batman: Deadly Knights, which gets highlighted in batjokes circles for the panel above. What I wasn't aware of is that Deadly Knights also draws contrast between Batman's and Punisher's methods by making a reference to The Killing Joke.

As you may recall, at the end of TKJ, the joke about the two men and the flashlight is preceded by Joker saying this:

At the end of Deadly Knights, Joker repeats the same line when he finds himself alone with Punisher:

Obviously Punisher has not already offered to help Joker like Batman had in TKJ, so I doubt the joke that Joker had in mind was the same one. It wouldn't make sense in this context. But Joker has seen how Punisher operates and is definitely interested in, uh, lightening the mood, even if he suspects Punisher isn't going to be swayed. The next speech bubble, in smaller type indicating self-doubt, actually also calls back to TKJ:

That took place after an earlier "joke," Joker's One Bad Day speech where he talks about the meaninglessness of the world. Maybe the joke he was going to tell Punisher was more along those lines, but if Batsy wasn't impressed by that one, this guy's not gonna have a better reaction.

But Batman did still say he wanted to help Joker, so maybe Joker's insanity plea will appeal to the same instinct in Punisher!

LOL it does not:

Back to the tiny type, to Joker realizing no charm or grace is going to save him and that Batsy's regard for him is something special indeed.

"That's enough" is kind of a funny line choice. That's more something you say not when averting a murder but when stopping a bully. "Joker's just a poor deranged clown! Leave him be, Frank! He wouldn't let me help him but I still believe!"

I just wanted to make note of the reference and don't have much else to say, so I'll close with another scene I didn't know about: Joker slipping on a banana peel.

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 01x10 - Kentarumon, the Defender / A Clue from the Digi Past

Previously on Digimon Adventure: It was so cold. So unbearably cold. Unbelievably cold. Facing down hypothermia and impossibly low temperatures, Taichi and Yamato were able to solve their problems through judicious application of more snow.

Now we turn our attention to another pair of kids, separated from the others by the fracturing of File Island.

Today's episode opens with Mimi and Koushiro's beds descending into the fractured island shards. In the dub, Izzy offers us some narration to coax us through shots of the beds descending.

Izzy: Tentomon, I would say we're traveling at a very high speed, plummeting toward an unidentified island! And, uh... crash landing is imminent! Tentomon: Try to think of it as if we're just hitting the beach!

XD That one got me. Inappropriate time for dark puns, Tentomon.

Upon landing in the midst of a tropical jungle, Mimi and Palmon discuss where to go from here.

Mimi: Where are we? Palmon: Since we were blown away so suddenly, I can't be sure. But I think this is a jungle. Mimi: Well, even I know that. What will happen to us now? Palmon: I don't know, but we should try looking for someone in the meantime. Mimi: Yeah, you're right! There has to be someone close by.

It's a pretty basic dialogue exchange. We don't know where we are and we're separated from the others; Let's go looking.

A perfect time for the dub to spice things up with some goofs.

Mimi: Oh no, humidity! Palmon: Yeah, some kind of tropical rainforest but not one I'm familiar with. It all happened so fast. Where are we? Mimi: Have you any idea what humidity does to my hair!? It goes all poodle-ey. Not a pretty sight. Palmon: Uhhh, perhaps we ought to look around and see if we can find any of the others. Mimi: Yeah! Let's go! Maybe we can at least find some air conditioning or something.

Unfortunately, per usual, that means playing Mimi off as lacking perspective and not understanding the situation she's in. I like Mimi complaining about the humidity; It's the last line, where she's expressly more concerned with fixing her hair than finding safety or her friends, that bugs me.

Meanwhile, Koushiro finds his way to an interesting ruin. Tentomon notices Koushiro's interest and tries to urge him to move along; Finding their friends should be the priority. But Koushiro tells him no; He thinks if he studies these ruins, he may learn information that could be useful later on. As Koushiro enters the ruins, Tentomon reluctantly follows his Partner.

Meanwhile, Mimi finds a bunch of bananas hanging from a tree! Excited, she asks Palmon to retrieve them - though Palmon struggles with the unfamiliar word "banana", which should probably be Mimi's first warning that this isn't about to go well.

Overjoyed, Mimi exclaims:

Mimi: I haven't had food that actually looks like food in a long time!

That's depressing. We're on Day 6 of File Island and the emergency rations were only going to last 1-2 days after they started feeding the Digimon too, so that checks out.

Dub Mimi has her own plans for the bananas.

Mimi: I was really starved! Now we can pretend we're having banana splits!

I don't think Palmon knows what that is but good on you for keeping positive!

Tragically, when Mimi goes to open the banana, she discovers that there's nothing inside the peel. The whole bunch is nothing but empty peels. Palmon bites one of the peels in half and reports that it's surprisingly good, but Mimi isn't having it. She yells out in frustration and then sulks next to the poop that fell off the tree.

Wait, what?

"Is that hair mousse?" ~Dub Mimi trying very hard to censor the obvious poop on the ground.

The poop, it seems, came from these two lunkheads. Palmon IDs them as Scumon (the yellow one) and Chuumon (the mouse). The dub refers to the former as Sukamon, based on a different romanization of the kanji that forms his name. But you can clearly it pronounced "Scum-mon".

From there, the narrator gives us the rundown on Scumon, but not Tyuumon. He's an Adult-stage Virus-type Digimon. His name, of course, derives from the word "scum".

Narrator: Scumon. He's shaped like a sparkling golden poop. Because he has no talents of his own, the smaller Chuumon acts as his brain.

For her rundown, Dub Palmon avoids the poop conversation but otherwise conveys the same idea.

Palmon: Sukamon and his mouse buddy are always together because they share the same teeny-tiny brain.

She also IDs Sukamon and Chuumon as "Sukamon and Chuumon, also known as the Digi-Losers", so apparently in the dub they have a reputation for being pathetic. Meanwhile, Dub Mimi calls Sukamon a "talking dessert", which is probably the grossest possible way to disguise him being a poop.

Scumon attacks, hopping across tree branches and hurling poops down at Mimi and Palmon. Mimi flees at first, but then she loses her temper and whips around to confront the pair.

Mimi demands to know what this is about, and Scumon explains that she's being robbed. He orders her to turn over all of her belongings. Naturally, Mimi refuses, so the assault renews.

Fleeing from the disgusting onslaught, Mimi tries to take cover behind a tree. The dub adds this line:

Mimi: That's it, I give up! I want to see the camp therapist!

Which is gold. Absolutely. Therapy for Mimi. Therapy for all of these children.

It's there that Scumon seizes his moment, sliding quietly down a tree to sneak up on her.

Scumon grabs the strap of Mimi's purse to take it from her, but his hand touches her Digivice in the process. Light erupts from the Digivice, blanketing Scumon and Chuumon.

The light seems to have done something to Scumon and Chuumon,

Scumon: My heart somehow feels refreshed! Chuumon: Very refreshed! Mimi: Well, we're not refreshed at all! Scumon: I feel like I've turned into a good poop! Chuumon: Good one! Good one! Mimi: (skeptically) I wonder if that's true. Palmon: Let me ask: Have you seen any humans around here? Scumon: Humans? Mimi: (gestures to Mimi) Something that looks like her. Scumon: (considers) Oh! Yes! Mimi: You saw them!? Scumon: It was far off so I can't be sure but I saw something like you and a Tentomon fall in the Ancient Dino Region. Mimi: Really!? If Tentomon was there, that must mean Koushiro-kun is there too! Palmon: But have you really become good Digimon now? Scumon: (dismissive) Yeah right, ahahaha! Palmon: You don't deny it!? Chuumon: At the very least, we feel like being good right now! Palmon: Then take us to the Ancient Dino Region.

Virus-types gonna Virus-type but at least they're feeling helpful. They're going to take us to Tentomon and Koushiro!

Meanwhile, in the dub:

Chuumon: That's better than chewing tin foil! Sukamon: I feel all tingly and refreshed, like a whole new person! Chuumon: Yeah! We're a whole new person! Mimi: Is this one as much of a pain as the last one!? Sukamon: No, really! We'll be nice from now on! Really! Mimi: So you'll leave us alone? Palmon: Wait! First, tell us if you've seen any other humans around here. Sukamon: Any what? Palmon: (gestures to Mimi) Creatures that look like this one! Sukamon: Uhh.... Chuumon: Well, as a matter of fact! Sukamon: Oh, yeah! I forgot! Mimi: Tell me! Sukamon: Well, it wasn't nearly as pretty as you are, of course. But we saw something fall into the old ruins with a Tentomon! Mimi: So when were you planning on telling us!? Next week!? They must have seen Izzy too, Palmon! Palmon: Listen, you two: Can you take us there? It's important that we find him. Sukamon: Sure! Okey-dokey! Palmon: No funny business! Sukamon: Cross our heart. Chuumon: And hope to die! Palmon: Well, of all the absolutely ridiculous things to say.

The bit about being a good poop is removed, of course. But in its place, we have the "chewing tin foil" line and an assertion that Koushiro cannot rival Mimi in prettiness.

Though, between the two endings to this conversation, Scumon and Chuumon responding to "Are you really good Digimon?" with "LOL NO but we're cool right now!" is my favorite.

Scumon and Chuumon lead the way to the Ancient Dino Region. There's. Uh. There's one small problem.

It's on a different shard.

While Mimi and Palmon contemplate how to solve this problem, Scumon and Chuumon reveal their true motives for being so helpful.

Mimi: Do we have to jump to get over there? Palmon: That's really scary. Chuumon: Hey, are you happy we helped you? Mimi: Yeah.... Scumon: Then, as thanks for helping, let's go on a date! (blows kiss) Mimi: YOU MUST BE JOKING!!! Palmon: (Poison Ivy's the other side) LET'S GO!!! GRAB ON!!! (Palmon swings them across to the other shard) Scumon: ...she left. Mimi: (cries) This keeps happening. I hate it. Scumon: (calling across) Let's meet again some time! Mimi: NO WAY!!! (akanbe)

For real, this does keep happening.

The dub version plays it this way:

Mimi: How are we supposed to get over there? Chuumon: You're the one with the big hat; You think of something! A gorgeous girl like you must have a big brain! Mimi: (sarcastic) Thanks a lot. Really. Sukamon: Before you go, maybe you'd give us a big Thank You kiss, huh? (blows kiss) Mimi: OH, PLEASE TELL ME THEY'RE KIDDING!!! Palmon: (Poison Ivy's the other side) CLIMB ABOARD QUICKLY!!! (Palmon swings them across to the other shard) Scumon: (sigh) Maybe we jumped the gun. Mimi: Ugh. Blegh. Just the thought of that kiss is making me queasy. Scumon: (calling across) That's okay! We'll wait 'til you come back! Mimi: Don't hold your breath! (akanbe)

The dub version doesn't hit quite the same intensity, but it still works. Losing the setup of Palmon being afraid to jump across costs it a bit, as we don't have that contrast for the "CLIMB ON LET'S GTFO" punchline. Palmon didn't want to make that jump, but she found her courage fast once this turned gross.

The biggest loss in the dub version is the callback to the Numemon earlier. Mimi has been on File Island for six days and been harassed twice now; She deserves to vent about it.

Meanwhile, Koushiro explores the ruin and discovers one of Devimon's Black Gears moving their shard. He speculates that he can make the shard stop moving if he can disable the Gear.

Koushiro: If I can stop this, I'm sure the island will stop moving. Tentomon: Even if that's the case, we aren't enough to stop this large thing. Let's leave it and go look for the others.

Continuing his efforts to convince Koushiro that finding their friends is more important, Tentomon tries to get clever with it. Playing on logistics to try and weasel Koushiro out of this ruin.

Dub Tentomon, on the other hand, sees no value in passive-aggression when aggressive-aggression is right there.

Izzy: You know what I think? If we keep this gear from turning, we'll completely jam that creep up! Tentomon: Or even better, we could not do that! Wouldn't that be fun? And then we can go look for the others like we should have done in the first place!

"Jam that creep up"? Izzy, what does that even mean?

Sadly for Tentomon, Koushiro next gets invested in the data code printed on the walls. It's the same characters as the code from the factory.

Koushiro: I inputted all that data I found then on my computer... If I could just find a power source.... Tentomon: You won't find something convenient like that here! Let's hurry up and go look for everyone.

Tentomon takes another swing. This too misses but at least he tried.

Meanwhile, his Dub Counterpart is at his wit's end.

Izzy: All that data is stored on my hard drive. If only there was a power source here.... Tentomon: Get a power source! Stop the Gear! Is "find our friends" on that list!?

Either way, no dice. Koushiro observes that the ruin has electric lighting, then follows that train of logic until he finds exactly what he needs.

(Sure, an electrical outlet sticking out of a tree root is weird, but at this point, Koushiro doesn't even question it. It's File Island. Shit's like that here.)

To Tentomon's supreme dismay, Koushiro is able to turn on his laptop. He sits down to start deciphering these symbols.

Fortunately, even if they can't go looking for their friends, their friends can come to them.

Mimi also tries to convince Koushiro that searching for the rest of their group is imperative, but he refuses. He thinks that making sense of this data will be the key to understanding File Island and its mysteries.

With nothing else to do, Mimi's left to sit with Tentomon and wait impatiently for him to finish his computer stuff. It's not clear how much time passes, but a transitory wipe tells us that this is some time later.

Mimi: How long are you going to keep doing this? Koushiro: ... Mimi: Will something good happen if you find out what that is? Koushiro: ... Tentomon: Koushiro-han, Mimi-han is talking to you. Mimi: Hey, do we get to go home if you find out what that is? Koushiro: ...well-- Ah! I see! This goes here.... (Mimi stands up impatiently) Tentomon: (panicking) Koushiro-han! Mimi: Are you listening!? When are you going to be done!? Koushiro: ... (Mimi begins to pop a vein from fury) Koushiro: Ah! This is.... (The data on his screen turns into a map of the labyrinth) The ruins are a maze! Mimi: KOUSHIRO, YOU IDIOT!!!

It's at this moment that Mimi breaks down and starts bawling. Full-on ugly crying. Palmon watches Mimi for a moment, then joins in and starts crying too.

In the dub, we have:

Mimi: Izzy, any idea how long this is going to take? I mean, can we go sometime before winter sets in!? Izzy! Tentomon: Izzy, your friend is asking you a question. Mimi: Yeah, and her rear end's getting cold sitting on this stone floor doing nothing! Izzy: Hmm? Oh! Wait... Wait! Yeah, yeah! That might work! (Mimi stands up impatiently) Tentomon: Uh-oh. Izzy! Mimi: Are you ignoring me, you computer geek pipsqueak!? Izzy: (muttering to himself) Okay, so if I make the variable constant and search for file patterns... (Mimi begins to pop a vein from fury) Izzy: HEY! Here's something! (The data on his screen turns into a map of the labyrinth) Prodigious! These ruins are a gigantic maze! Mimi: I'M LEAVING!!! RIGHT NOW!!!

Similar to Taichi and Yamato's fistfight from last episode, both Mimi and Koushiro are sympathetic here and yet we can see how their characteristics are hurting each other.

The start of this exchange flows better in Japanese; There are pauses inserted between Mimi's questions to give Koushiro space to ignore her. In English, she never stops talking so we don't get to see for ourselves that her words are falling on deaf ears.

Nonetheless, there's good bits in both versions. I like the Japanese "Do we get to go home if you find out what that is?" and the English "[My] rear end's getting cold sitting on this stone floor doing nothing!"

Both of these remarks do a good job of conveying Mimi's problem with Koushiro's behavior; Like Taichi and the other side of the ocean, we're in the most dire crisis situation we've been in yet, and he's more interested in satisfying his curiosity than in the wellbeing of his fellow survivors. He doesn't even know what he expects to find here; Just. Something. Anything. Whatever the wall has to offer, honestly; He's not picky.

In conclusion, Koushiro made my kid cry so he needs to die the death of a thousand knives I AM A FAIR AND IMPARTIAL--

At the same time, maybe this is the key to cracking that Black Gear. We'll never know until we find out, right? As easy as it is to sympathize with Tentomon and with Mimi, it's as easy to sympathize with Koushiro. He's trying to concentrate on deciphering a computer code that has already demonstrated its influence over reality in the past, and we're making that harder.

They may not get into a knock-down brawl, but Mimi and Koushiro hurt each other. They struggle to see each other's point of view until it hits a breaking point.

Well, this escalated. Tentomon puts in his best effort to try and calm things down.

Tentomon: P-please don't cry! (turning to Koushiro) Koushiro-han! Koushiro: Y-your crying is bothersome. Tentomon: Koushiro-han, do something! Koushiro: Do what? Mimi: I'm hungry! I'm thirsty! I want to see everyone again! I don't want to stay in here any longer! Palmon: Me neither! Why are you ignoring us, Koushiro? Koushiro: I'm not ignoring you. Palmon: Then why aren't you listening to us? Koushiro: What's important right now is analyzing this data. You might not understand now but ultimately this will be very useful to Mimi-san and-- Mimi: No more! I hate you, Koushiro-kun! Palmon: You're not doing this for Mimi! You just like working with machines more, don't you! Koushiro: No, that's not true. Palmon: It's true, it has to be!

In total meltdown mode, Mimi flees from the room, but the door she exits from leads deeper into the ruin rather than outside. Tentomon flies after her to try and calm her down, leaving Palmon with Koushiro.

The dub seems a little more sympathetic to all sides of this altercation. Well, except Palmon.

Tentomon: Oh, don't cry, Mimi! (Palmon starts crying) Oh no, not you too! (turns to Izzy) Izzy, do something! Izzy: Do what!? My laptop can't do everything! Tentomon: I don't know! Tell her you're sorry! Izzy: Sorry for what!? Mimi: I can't take it anymore! I haven't had anything to eat and my feet are killing me and a giant lemon custard tried to kiss me and all I want to do is get out of here! Palmon: We just want to leave; Is that so wrong!? Honestly, Izzy, how can you be so insensitive!? Izzy: Insensitive!? What do you mean!? Palmon: You ignore us while you poke away at your computer. Izzy: I'm not ignoring you! I'm doing something ultra-important like maybe saving this world! If I can just decipher these hieroglyphs then maybe we could-- Mimi: Just keep your stupid hieroglyphics! Palmon: You just like playing on your computer, that's all! Izzy: You think I'm just playing around here!? Palmon: I almost think you like computers more than people!

Mimi, Izzy, and Tentomon all walk away from this dub with something extra. For Mimi, they rope in the context of her Sukamon encounter earlier leaving her high-strung and stressed out, to make her blow-up feel more understandable.

Tentomon offers more helpful suggestions than "Do something!", specifically encouraging Izzy to apologize to Mimi.

For Izzy, they cut out the line where he expressly calls Mimi bothersome and have him heroically claim that this research is meant to save Digi-World. In the original, all he's said on the matter of his motives is that he wants to understand this world's mysteries.

Everyone comes off a little rosier for these changes except for Palmon; Her new dialogue is a lateral shift.

Fleeing blindly into the labyrinth, Mimi trips over a tree root and falls flat on her face. Tentomon flies in after her, trying to help. But she is inconsolable, screaming that she wants to go home and running deeper inside.

Outside the ruins, Palmon and Koushiro search for them. Realizing they aren't out here, the only alternative is deeper inside. That's a problem, given what Koushiro learned earlier: These ruins are a huge maze. If Mimi and Tentomon went deeper in, they might never come back out.

Mimi calms down offscreen, and she and Tentomon begin to find their way together. The sight of a familiar marking on the wall, however, reveals that they're going in circles.

Back out front, Palmon wants to go in after Mimi, but Koushiro talks her out of it. She'd get lost too.

Though it's a bit more dangerous in the original version.

Koushiro: It looks like there are many traps set up inside this maze. Unless I finish this data analysis, we'll both get lost with them.

Whereas in the dub, he has this to say:

Izzy: We won't [leave them] but this is one super-complicated maze. I've gotta try to get a handle on it! Then maybe I can help get them out.

No mention of the traps; Only that it's complicated.

I like that the original expressly mentions finishing his data analysis, as that directly connects back to what he was saying about this research helping Mimi-san. The story's conspired to put Palmon in a situation where the way to save Mimi is by letting Koushiro complete his work.

Meanwhile, in the maze, a rock falls on Mimi's head because today doesn't suck enough yet.

This provokes her to vent about Koushiro.

Mimi: Owww.... Tentomon: Are you okay, Mimi-han? Mimi: That, and all of this, is Koushiro-kun's fault! Really! The way he ignores people makes me so mad! Tentomon: Well, it's true that Koushiro-han lacks charm, but he's not a bad boy! Mimi: But it's true that in his eyes, I'm not a consideration! Tentomon: When he gets caught up in something, he just doesn't notice anything else! I think he's a really good guy.

Tentomon, I don't think roundabout agreeing with her is the way to convince her that Koushiro's better than she thinks.

The dub keeps the falling rock but uses the vagueness of where it landed on her hat to spare her the impact.

Mimi: Great! Tentomon: Oh, dear! Are you hurt? Mimi: No, I'm fine. I'm getting used to it by now! (angrily muttering) If I'd just gone to cheerleading camp, none of this would have happened! Tentomon: Let's try a systematic approach to this. Maybe if we just keep turning to the left.... Mimi: Why should I listen to you? It's your friend Izzy that got me into this mess in the first place! Tentomon: Wait, don't be too hard on him! Yes, he gets a little wrapped up on his work and doesn't always interact well with others but he's a good boy!

...cheerleading camp for fourth-graders? Is that a thing? I'm not going to google that.

Tentomon's flailing to find a way to defend Koushiro in both versions. His arguments boil down to, "Yes, Koushiro sucks in the ways you describe, but I like him anyway!" I'm glad Koushiro isn't here to hear himself defended this poorly. XD

It's hard for Tentomon because he isn't equipped to win this argument. He agrees with Mimi, so what defenses can be made of Koushiro's choices aren't arguments Tentomon can make. He was saying the same things to Koushiro before Mimi arrived. But he wants to defend Koushiro anyway because that's his Partner. They have an emotional bond.

Speaking of which....

Koushiro finishes his analysis, activating new functionality on his map. Now he has a glowing dot revealing Mimi's precise location within the labyrinth, which he can click on to hear her and Tentomon.

Reasoning that an audio channel should work both ways, he takes out a headset and plugs it in. Calling out to Mimi, Koushiro offers to guide her through the maze. Palmon backs him up, assuring Mimi that he can handle this. Mimi accepts Koushiro's guidance.

As Koushiro guides her through, suddenly a yellow blinking dot appears, slowly approaching Mimi's red dot. Uncertain of what that could be, Koushiro tells Mimi to run.

It takes no time at all for the yellow dot to reveal himself to Mimi.

Kentarumon, an Adult-stage Data-type Digimon. His name is derived from the word "centaur", obviously. The narrator gives us his rundown.

Narrator: Kentarumon. A proud Digimon who is half-man, half-beast. With high pressure air spurting from his back, he can move at the speed of sound.

Kentarumon himself is another voiceless Digimon given dialogue in the dub, which also pronounces his name with a soft C sound instead of a hard K.

Centarumon: Tentomon? It's been such a long time! Tentomon: Oh no! Centarumon! Half-man, half-horse! You really don't want to get on either of his bad sides!

This dub exchange implies a bit of a history; Centarumon recognizes Tentomon on sight, but Tentomon reacts to Centarumon with fear and trepidation before even knowing about his Black Gear.

Fleeing from Kentarumon, Koushiro directs them into a dead end. They don't understand, but when they try to ask him about it, he's gone. We cut back to his laptop and mic lying on the ground, abandoned by Koushiro and Palmon.

Kentarumon approaches, converting his arm into a cyberpunk pulse cannon. He can't call it because he doesn't speak, but this is his signature move: Hunting Cannon.

(Seems like overkill for hunting but, then again, I've seen the wildlife on this island so maybe not.)

Kentarumon misses his first shot, breaking open a chunk of the wall and letting light spill in. Mimi desperately asks Tentomon to evolve, but he can't; Not without Koushiro.

Fortunately, he won't be without Koushiro for long. Leaving the computer behind and taking action, Koushiro and Palmon break down the weak outer wall in the room he sent Mimi too.

And now it's a fight. Palmon evolves into Togemon to protect Mimi from Kentarumon. Tentomon also evolves, but this decision is... questionable.

Room ain't big enough for Kabuterimon. His size increase also ends up pushing Togemon over, nearly killing Koushiro.

Bad choices were made. Fortunately, Kentarumon fixes it by blasting everyone through the wall and sending them outside. Once they're free to move, this fight is over in an instant.

A combination Chiku Chiku Bang-Bang and Mega Blaster hit Kentarumon hard enough to destroy his Black Gear. Easy as pie.

As with most corrupted Digimon, the act of being corrupted messed with Kentarumon's linguistics in the original. Once he wakes up, he's able to speak. He recognizes the Digivice on Mimi's bag and brings the kids back inside the ruins, officially introducing us to the device the kids have had on them for so long.

Kentarumon explains the Digivices to Koushiro and Mimi, though he doesn't have much information to offer beyond vague gesturing at goodness.

It's a holy device that "guides the world towards light while driving out the darkness". We've seen that in action a few times by this point, but it's good to have it finally put into words. These ruins are dedicated to the Digivice, with Kentarumon as their guardian.

He doesn't have time to say any more, because they have a visitor.

Kentarumon demands an explanation for the weird shit Leomon's saying. But Leomon goes straight to work, lunging for the kids and firing off his Juuouken. Kentarumon blocks his shot, refusing to let Leomon attack these children.

Kentarumon: These children hold the holy devices. After protecting these ruins for so long, it is now my duty to also protect these children!

Leomon breaks free from Kentarumon and fires off his Juuouken, but Kentarumon darts away from the shot and returns fire with Hunting Cannon. This exchange lets the dub officially name both of these attacks: Fist of the Beast King and Solar Ray.

Leomon tanks Kentarumon's Hunting Cannon, then returns fire with a point-blank Juuouken to the face. His shot puts Kentarumon down for the count.

Well, that's settled. Nothing left to do but kill the children.

Leomon advances on the kids. Mimi shrieks, raising her purse to hide behind. In the process, activating her Digivice attached to the purse strap and shining its purifying light on Leomon.

Seeing Leomon falter, Koushiro understands. He grabs his Digivice and encourages Mimi, and together they drive Leomon away.

"Bad kitty! Out! Go on, out!" ~Dub Mimi, in what may be the best line of the episode.

Leomon retreats, allowing the kids to regroup with Kentarumon.

Mimi: Did he run away? I guess we're saved. Koushiro: Is this the power of the holy device? Mimi: Who cares about that? I'm hungry.

Koushiro's awed by the power of the Digivice, but Mimi's still as hangry as she was when she entered the labyrinth.

Dub Mimi's more excited about all this.

Mimi: Well, that got rid of him! These things really are kind of amazing! Izzy: A preserver of light against the darkness.... Mimi: Can you order a pizza with it? I'm still starving.

How mad do you think these kids would be if it turned out their Digivices could summon pizza this entire time? I'd be furious.

With Leomon driven off, the kids turn their attention to the Black Gear out front.

Koushiro asks Kentarumon to stop the Black Gear, but he refuses. The evil power inside the Gear is too much for him. This leaves Koushiro with no choice but to return to his computer.

Mimi: Even after I said I was hungry, he's still doing this. Koushiro: As I thought, I'll have to analyze this data with the data from these other characters. I'm sure I'll find a hint in here. Mimi: Bah! We'll be waiting 10 billion and 10 thousand years for that to be deciphered! Koushiro: But-- Mimi: (storms over to the Gear) This Gear can't even fill my stomach!

We are right back where we started. Koushiro dives back into his computer, setting off Mimi again.

The irony is not lost on Dub Mimi.

Mimi: Are you still going on about that? We need to start looking for something to eat! Izzy: Guess I'll just have to keep deciphering and analyzing these two sets of hieroglyphs. I'm sure all the answers are in here somewhere. Mimi: Excuse me!? Isn't this where I came in!? You're not seriously starting all that again, not right now! Izzy: Just a nano! Mimi: (storms over to the Gear) This Black Gear! Who cares about that dumb old thing!? All I want is lunch!

Mimi's furious punt wins the day. While Koushiro had been approaching this analytically, Mimi lashing out and taking direct action does the trick. The Black Gear kicks into reverse, sending the shard back towards Infinity Mountain.

Mimi and Koushiro go outside to see the effects for themselves. There, the practical evidence convinces Koushiro of the wisdom in what the others have been expressing to him.

Koushiro: The island is moving backwards! I see! Just like you said, Mimi-san, there are many things I should try out physically! Mimi: I'M HUNGRY!!!

I wonder how different this episode would be if that banana bunch had actually contained any bananas in it.

I don't know if they did it on purpose or not but the dub's version of this sounds a little condescending.

Izzy: Look! The process has reversed itself. Excellent work, Mimi; It just goes to show you that sometimes the simplest solution is actually the best. Mimi: That's not much of a compliment.

It's not much of a concession either. Koushiro's vindication from their argument came when his data was useful in rescuing Mimi from the labyrinth. This moment is supposed to be Mimi's vindication, with Koushiro acknowledging the merit in getting up and doing things rather than simply analyzing.

But the way Izzy says it doesn't make it sound like he learned anything from this, but rather that he's simply acknowledging Mimi for a task completed. He's imparting the lesson on a non-specific "you" rather than claiming ownership of it.

With the two island shards now drifting apart, with close on one last attempt by Scumon, who's been waiting this whole time for Mimi to return. He calls out to her, asking one last time for a romantic date, and we clone on Mimi shooting him another akanbe.

Assessment: Like the previous episode did for Taichi's boldness and Yamato's selflessness, this episode shines a light on the darkness buried in Koushiro's curiosity and Mimi's sincerity. The two characters have diametrically opposed ways of experiencing and engaging with the world around them, and so their collision hurts them both.

But we also see those characteristics shine through in the end, as the episode builds them both up to a triumphant vindication. Ending on the implicit statement that neither Mimi nor Koushiro is wrong for how they are, but rather that they could stand to learn a few things from one another.

Mimi could stand to be more thoughtful in the choices that she makes, and Koushiro could stand to jump off a cliff because he made my kid cry be more active in his approach to problem-solving. The data he uncovered was vital in saving Mimi's life from the labyrinth but also the Black Gear he'd been contemplating was trivially easy to reverse as soon as anyone bothered to try.

For the dub, this is one of the stronger localizations. A lot of their jokes landed. While their take on these scenes was weaker in some places, they added a lot to others. It's not perfect; As with Tai last episode, they sand off some of Izzy and Mimi's rough edges. But I think it's the best dub we've gotten thus far.

[saltygilmores]

THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: S3/EP4/ONE’S GOT CLASS THE OTHER ONE DYES (PART 5)

Parts 1-4 and all other episodes are linked in my pinned post.

OMG. PHRASING, LUCAS. PHRASING!! IT'S OKAY EVERYBODY! HE MEANT METAPHORICALLY, PEOPLE.

I mean, your affair with Dean Forrester should already have you on some kind of registry.

Luke is giddy with delight over Lorelai's humilation at the school and is giggling up a storm, a gigglestorm the likes of which I've never heard before from him. Let's alll point and laugh at Lorelai! It's fun.

The KarenDebbies are descending upon us. I can't wait to hear Lorelai say the word "condoms"!

I've never seen him this happy before?

Sadly with no context I wouldn't be able to tell if this was 2023 or 2002. Karens: Why were you discussing your pregnancy, why didn't you change the subject? Lorelai: I tried but they kept coming at me like I was poland and they were Nazis. Urrrp.

In my unrated Gilmore Girls rewrite titled The Hollow, I promise to rewrite this episode so that we see Lorelai throwing condoms at high school students.

Well as long it's just a banana and you don't bring Dean for the subject of your demonstration. KarenDebbie: What kind of mother are you?! Lorelai: The kind that doesn't just gloss over uncomfortable topics!

My ass you don't. She spends a good 75% of season 3 moving heaven and earth to interfere in Jess and Rory's relationship and cockblocking them to make sure these two legal adults don't fuck each other instead of giving Rory any sort of useful information about sex and you should know better than anyone that that's a solid recipe for teen pregnancy, Miss GlossyPants. Speaking of. Guess who else is about to get a fumbling attempt at Awkward Parental Sex Talk? This li'l guy.

We don't want Shane to get pregnant. It would make her already tragic impending death even more tragic.

So, what's up with Luke's apartment? There's a guitar, bongos, and maracas (plus a sign he stole from a bus stop). Does he have a secret past in some kind of salsa band?

Luke referring to a human being as something you can "stash in a closet" like an old box of Monopoly is fucking hilarious. The delivery is also very "Jess are you a gigolo?" and "What are you, a drug dealer now?" Like he knows it's a ridiculous question but he's also mildly concerned that the answer is going to be Yes. And now, for all time favorite exchange in the entire Gilly Girls World:

Jess and Rory are cool and all. But Luke and Jess are it for me. These two are the reason I keep watching. Their dynamic is so perfect and things were never the same after Milo left, not only because of the breakup of Literati but because I desperately miss these two guys playing off each other.

I don't know. I feel like Shane wouldn't give a flying cupcake about getting caught. She had no problem repeatedly barging into the diner to hump Jess' leg while Luke and Lorelai were watching and Luke had to part them like Moses parting the sea to wait tables, and she had no problem playing tonsil hockey with Jess against a tree for hours in view of hundreds of people. More evidence that this little dude is lying and that Closet Girl wasn't actually Shane.

We know, Jesstopher. We know. You little freakazoid.

Amen, brother.

Bolt the doors Lucas he's gonna run! Luke should be pulling a Lorelai and throwing bags of condoms at Jess. Stars Hollow called an emergency town meeting after he drew on a sidewalk with chalk. I can't imagine the fate of both Jess and Luke if it were discovered that Jess planted his demon seed in anyone but especially precious Rory.

I love it when Luke tells Jess to shut up. Fantastic stuff. Luke: If you care about this Shane girl you have to treat her better. Jess: I don't care about her. I don't know her last name. She mentioned it once, didn't stick. We're just "hangin out." Staaahp. Jess is so deliciously blunt and nonchalant about her. Anyone fellow Millenials here? Does anyone else remember that in high school in the late 90's and early 2000's "hooking up" (or in Jess' case, "hanging out") meant literally anything you wanted it to mean and so one of your friends could say "I hooked up with Jason last night" but that could mean they either made out for a few minutes or they were full on bumping uglies or something in between and you often had to ask uncomfortable questions. It was a very confusing time. It kept us all on our toes.

Luke, you have a pair of eyes. You've seen what they do in your diner. There should not exist any doubt that they're not convening in your apartment to play checkers.

I'm telling you, the dynamic of the entire Danes-Mariano family is so complex and interesting and I would twist my nipple for this show to delve into it as much as humanly possible at the expense of pushing Rory and Lorelai to the side (Lorelai off a cliff). I've hit the ceiling for screen shots here on Tumblr.com so here's the last three minutes of the episode: Luke: You need to find a girl you actually care about. Jess: Yah like it's that easy. Luke: Ya huh it's that easy if you try Jess: The girls I like don't give a damn about me. I'm not just gonna sit around hoping they change their minds and notice me, unlike SOME PEOPLE. Luke: Da fuq does that mean Jess: ya fixed any neighbor's porshes *porches lately? Luke: Shut up Jess: I've got a little self esteem Luke: Shut up Jess: Gotta go, Shane's horny again Well, that attempt at the Birds and Bees talk certainly went off the rails. Luke was able to impart to Jess that teenage boys have raging hormones and they tend to like girls and Jess don't be an idiot. It's okay Luke, at least you tried.

[littlemessyjessi]

Sleepwalker: BTS Reactions

BTS Reactions 

BTS x Plus Size Reader

A/N:  So I'm a sleepwalker.  I have been all my life. It just�� it is what it is.  While part of it is just me standing in the middle of the kitchen staring at a cabinet or walking up and down the hallway… sometimes it's really funny.  I've thought about sharing this with you more than once because we do have some little cheap cameras set up over the house.  Mostly, just so in the event that I ended up causing damage to myself or our home.. we would have proof as to why.  And also, just for shits and giggles.  However, for whatever reason… I always end up taking my pants off or just go completely naked… and that's just not suitable for the internet.  Nor would I subject myself to that.  So instead, my fiance and I have made a list of some of the best moments and I've decided to write some fanfic for you.  If you want more of this or want to see it in other fandoms, please let me know because honestly, I've got so many scenarios, lol.

For reference for most of these scenes, Val (my beloved fiance) is played by the member and you (and oh my god I am so sorry to place this burden upon you but…) you are playing the part of myself in this tragic reenactment of my nightly escapades.   I am so sorry that you are inspired by my own craziness.  My apologies. 

I have finessed it a little bit to fit the members more with their reactions but honestly, it's pretty damn close to Valentina's reactions.  Please enjoy the insanity. 

BTS Reactions… to you being a sleepwalker….. 

Seokjin: 

(A/N: For context, we had been petsitting Val's sister's pet, Gizmo. I'm assuming this is what spawned this reaction, lol.) 

"You're just a glorified rat! That's all a hamster is!" 

Jin's head whipped around, brows furrowed at your sudden announcement, confusion and irritation written across his face. 

One because he thought you were already asleep and two… because you had just insulted him… in such a weird way. 

However, once his eyes landed on you, he understood immediately. 

He rolled his eyes but they were twinkling with amusement. 

You were standing there in the middle of the room.  

Ass cheeks on display in nothing but your night shirt as you gave the orange on the counter a stern talking to. 

Sleepwalking.   

Again. 

"I don't even like bananas."  you slurred.  "Jerk." 

Jin bit his lip to keep his laughter at bay. 

You suddenly whipped around and marched past him back towards the bedroom. 

He waited until he heard the door shut to lose it. 

He couldn't wait to bring this up tomorrow. 

Yoongi: 

He was fast asleep when he began to feel something tugging his arm. 

His eyes blearily blinked open when he saw that you were standing at the edge of the bed trying to leave the room. 

Only to be held back by your joined hands. 

That was nothing new as he often held your hand while he was sleeping. 

He was a bit like an otter in that respect and it had only intensified when he realized that you were a sleepwalker. 

You let out an unintelligible groan of frustration. 

"Lemme go… ' swear to God… you don't even know me…." 

Yoongi lifted a brow at you, still half asleep himself, but didn't let go of your hand. 

Instead, he gentle passed his thumb back and forth across the back of your hand until you gasped and he could tell that you were coming out of it. 

"Babe?" you asked. 

"You were sleepwalking again." he said, his voice even deeper with sleep.  "Come back to bed." 

You didn't say anything and just got back into bed. 

And Yoongi linked your hands again. 

Hoseok: 

He was on a mission. 

It was three in the morning.  It has been twenty minutes. 

And you were nowhere to be found. 

Your nightly escapades were nothing new to Hoseok but usually there would at least be a sound to let him know where you were and what you were into. 

So as the hands of the clock closed in on three twenty… he was up and out of the bed. 

Ten more minutes and still he couldn't find you. 

He was getting ready to make a call when he stopped dead in his tracks and let out an unholy scream. 

You were standing right outside of the sliding glass door to the balcony. 

Stark naked and staring at him like he was your prey. 

You scared the absolute hell out of him. 

You just looked…. so creepy. 

He was caught between wanting to get as far away from you as possible and the obvious need to get your naked ass back in the house. 

Eventually, the latter won out and he slowly opened the door and you just kinda walked past him. 

He made a mental note to get better locks and placed a hand over his racing heart. 

You were gonna give him a heart attack one of these days. 

Namjoon: 

Well, part of him was very very curious as to what could cause you to sleep walk but the other part was just worried. 

Poor Joonie. 

He thought you'd already established that he was the clumsy one in this relationship. 

But you were an unholy terror when you were sleepwalking. 

He could barely keep up at times. 

He was continuously following behind you cleaning up the chaos that you created in your sleep. 

He made up his mind at that moment. 

He didn't want children anymore. 

Between the two of you… that was enough.  

You could just be his baby forever. 

Jimin: 

"You'll be such a pretty princess." 

If Jimin wasn't such a damn sap for you… this might've gotten on his nerves. 

However, it was five in the morning and you'd dressed him up in your best dress and were currently (horribly) smearing pink lipstick on his lips. 

You were out of it but apparently you were in the mood for a makeover. 

And he let you. 

Because he loves you. 

He could always take a shower. 

That's what soap is for. 

However, he definitely took pictures to guilt you with the next day.  

And also to prove to you that you did, in fact, put that red lipstick in your eyebrows and not him. 

Taehyung: 

Well, this one is kind of chaotic in general. 

Because so does he. 

So needless to say, the security system is quite good because there's no telling what either of you could get into. 

Jimin, being the night owl that he is, will sometimes just pop around and get in with the security code just to check on your both. 

He's used to Taehyung's particular brand of insanity but it was real hard to look you in the eyes the next day after he came by to check on ya'll and you were standing stark naked on top of the counter trying to dust the ceiling. 

As far as Taehyung goes, he realized how crazy the sleepwalking thing goes from first hand experience. 

So he definitely installed cameras around the house and now the two of you watch the footage on the regular. 

Neither could of you could ever post it for more than one reason but you get the biggest kick out it sometimes. 

Jungkook: 

Well, this goes one of two ways. 

If he's already asleep and you start … you are shit out of luck. 

There ain't nothing waking him up. 

However, if you start before he's out…. game on. 

He considers it a personal challenge to either slowly bring you out of it or get you back to bed. 

And while it's definitely competitive kookie mode… he's like so sweet about it. 

I mean, come on.  We've all seen this man. 

He's so precious about it. 

"Come on, jagi.  Let's go to bed.   Yeah, it's nice and comfy." 

Occasionally, you just end up in Bam's house and he's says 'fuck it' and joins you. 

And Bam gets in ya'lls bed…. silently judging the both of you for this clear breach of sanity. 

……

—-

Hey, loves! I hope you liked it! I'm trying out new content styles! If you liked, it please let me know!

Love, K

Permanent Tag List:

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[mugzymiik]

MugzyMiik's Introduction Post

TPC SHOWDOWN [Still on hiatus; should be back up and running soon however]

HII HII HELLOOO!!! I'M GOLD!!! OR OCTOBER!!! OR BUG!!! Feel free to call me literally anything at all though, as long as I'll be able to recognize it as me that you're referring to I don't mind at all :D

(Gold and October are the names that I prefer to be used the most for me, Bug is a close second)

My pronouns??? Wouldn't YOU like to know, weatherboy? Jk. He/she (they is fine too), xe/xem, ve/vem, ae/aer, e/em, or just any! (I am a little iffy on "it" but that's chill as well as long as it's not not used in a demeaning way, even if jokingly)

My gender? Whatever the joke calls for. (/j I'm genderflux)

I prefer masculine or feminine terms, but androgynous ones are fine too 👍

Before You Interact:

I am a MINOR. I may make a few suggestive jokes here and there, but in the end, I AM 17. Keep that in mind if you are interacting with me and over 18.

I have autism, ADHD and anxiety. I also have a hard time reading tone in general, so tone tags would be very much appreciated when interacting with me! Please please please please please please please whenever you're saying something that could be taken in a negative way and/or could be confused for anger please please please please please please please use tone tags I will cry

Alongside that, I am heavily disabled in general and I tend to joke about that at times. If that annoys you, sucks to suck. It's my disability to cope with, not yours <3 /srs

I take a long while to fully process/realize things. Please keep that in mind and be patient. I also don't notice a lot of things until they've fully "went by", and this does include things I say that could potentially be taken as rude. Please do let me know if you take offense to anything I say!!! I likely don't mean it :[ /gen

PLEASE KEEP ANY SORT OF FACIAL BODY HORROR AWAY FROM ME. I love body horror. I love psychological horror. I don't like jumpscares, but I like eeriness in media and the expectation that there WILL be a jumpscare. But I get REALLY freaked out by facial body horror specifically (e.g. unnaturally-extended mouths (with little to no teeth visible especially), wonky facial positions meant to be unnerving, things like that)- it sends me into a state of severe paranoia a lot of the time and it's. Not Fun, to say the least

I'm a VERY heavy Gold (TPC) kinnie!!! So if you see me going around calling Pyrare "my father", calling Barracuda "my dead as hell brother", calling the other TPC Heroes "my siblings", calling the Yellow Tree of Life "my mother", etc., that's why! (If this makes you uncomfortable, please tell me. /gen)

I'm also a JSaB triangle player kinnie. Yes,,, just the triangle. :3

I use all capital letters a lot!!! I'm a pretty easily-excited person in general, and when I'm pretty damn excited, I go all bananas, keyboard-smashing and all. So please don't think I'm "yelling" at you if I ever say something in all caps!!! I'm just horsing around, I prommie!!!

I swear a lot. So if this bothers you, please tell me, and I'll make an honest attempt to refrain from swearing around you!

I'm very childish sometimes. If you don't like that, sorry, I guess? Block me and move on if you don't...?

I'm also very much an "embrace your cringe!!! ^w^" person, even if I'm partially embarrassed half the time I do it myself- if you participate in "cringe culture" or whatever the fuck literally just block me. If I find you going out of your way to harass me or my friends for being "cringe" I'll spam so many fucking OwO UwUs in your inbox, this isn't a threat this is a promise /srs

Do NOT Interact If You:

Are racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, and/or are just a bigoted piece of shit in general (YES, this Includes people who are against neopronouns. Fuck off.)

Are under 13. I'm an older teenager and I do NOT feel comfortable AT ALL interacting with people who aren't even teens yet online. You shouldn't even be on here.

Are or support transrace/transabled/transage/transx/transid/whatever the hell you fuckers say you are. You're an embarrassment to humanity, stop fucking intruding on LGBTQ+ terms. You are not welcome here, and you never will be. :)

Support "proship", or whatever the term is, at all. I personally think it should actually be referred to as "proshit", but go off I guess :) Yes, this also goes alongside """MAP"""s entirely. Just use the actual term. You know what it is. Same as above: you are NOT welcome here. Ever.

Use and/or support the use of Al "art"– art can only be considered art if it was made with some kind of passion, which literally all humans on Earth have. An Al doesn't have passion. Al can't create art, it can only steal from those who do.

Engage in and/or support the use of cryptocurrency/NFTs

Are here to cause drama

Are supporters/friends of Cintagonisupset

Even just associate with constant_hungr / hxngr / ravesrage / whatever the fuck he decides to call himself now or later on. Do NOT fucking try to even "pass on a message", I don't want to even fucking THINK of him.

Support Breabear Jones/Mirei Touyama Animations in ANY way, shape or form. I will NOT be housing ANY sort of interaction from a proshipper, groomer, etc. supporter. <3

Are named Ry*n [a], or Q**nn [ui]. I'm sorry, potential friend. /gen

Are just a shitty person overall

My Tags:

General Tags:

#mmmramblez - Rambling tag (sometimes will be with "#gold's gone insane again!")

#art - Art!!! :D

#animation - Animation!!! :D

#writing - Writing!!! :D

#shitpost - Funy :3c

#ask - Ask replies!!! Ask me shit I wanna talk /SILLY/NF (it may take me a while to answer though, fair warning)

#drawing ideas - Tag for things I might wanna draw later (mostly cursed images)

#for later - It's a surprise tool that will help us later! /j/ref

#MUG FRIENDOS - Me and the boyes (/gn) skittering to the kitchen to find some BEANS >:] (will often be accompanied by the tag "hi [x]" for different people)

#goober shit good shit <3 - The Goobers™'s content posts :3c

Fandom-Related Tags:

#Tsavorite hugs everybody - You're next. :] /j [PAUSED AS OF RIGHT NOW]

#tpc leg day au - The tag for my Pink Corruption crack AU, where everything is the same, except monsters are just normal shapes with very long legs

#tpc shorts but also not - The tag for a """series""" I'm doing; just random "skits" for The Pink Corruption that ideas for pop into my head from time to time. Ranges from cringe-worthy unfunny to making you think "I might have really bad humor"

#ancestry life MORE LIKE- - My tag for an elemental-powered Warriors roleplay server I won't stfu about

#mugzys tpc designs - My "interpretation designs" for all the characters from The Pink Corruption >:]

#tpc episode - Google Drive links for TPC episodes. I am NOT allowing Breabitch Jackass to get more views

#trongle stash - I am the #1 JSaB triangle player enthusiast :3c I forget to tag this a lot 😭

Blogs I Run/Help Run:

@mugzymiik-infodump - Longer infodump blog!!! Watch me go insane! /j

@pinkcorruption-verysillyedition - The Pink Corruption incorrect quotes blog! Submissions are (almost) always open!

@askgoldnco - Ask blog for Gold, Tsavorite, Cyanide, and many others from The Pink Corruption! [VERY HEADCANON-HEAVY; ALSO ON AN INDEFINITE HIATUS AS OF RIGHT NOW]

@angry-nacho-boy - Roleplay blog for Gold! [VERY HEADCANON-HEAVY]

@the-false-hero-of-paradise - BUG BLOG!!! BUG BLOG!!! >:D

@shattered-body-but-not-spirit - The Pink Corruption AU blog where Tsavorite is killed by a very familiar corrupt upon the caretakers group reaching The Land of Spheres. Though… What's this? …Wait– HE'S A GHOST?! [DEATH CW; NOT AT ALL DESCRIBED, THOUGH IT'S STILL A BIG THEME OF THE AU]

@cats-turn-naturally-pink-somehow - The Pink Corruption x Warriors AU blog!

@falseparadiseau - Ask blog for my OTHER Just Shapes & Beats AU, False Paradise! (One and Two should totally kiss btw /silly)

@siblingspremiumfreetrial - Bug and Equilibrium Gold askblog <3

People On Here That Are Really Cool And You Should Absolutely Follow (If You Want)! :D:

THE GOOBERS!!! <333 Fuck with them, I fuck with your knees.:

@darkhatkid - Scares the shit out of me every time she swears

@many-faced - TEA CYAN FOUND THE CORPSE-

@/m00nlit_sage - Foretold the Flying Bed Prophecy

Other Guys, But Are Just As Cool :D:

@taxi-dummy - I stole their clown shoes joke :3c

@cowboytorrenter - We like bagel boys in this household.

@tasty-eggs - Big bald forehead

@streetmurder - WON'T STOP HAVING ROMANTIC AFFAIRS WITH MY MOTHER

@trash-jsab - 🫵 GIVE ME YOUR CHARACTERS, WE FEAST AT DAWN BITCHES

@paw-ureyesout - Flowerpower CEO

@comet--crusaders - I AM EATING YOUR ART BITCH THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME

@corrupt-hexafish - *GRABS YOU* /aff

@octahedral-chaos - I don't think we have any mutual fandoms but that's ok I still find you cool >:3c

@makothedorito - WE MET ON TOYHOUSE AND THEN WE SPOTTED EACH OTHER ON TUMBLR WOAH!!!

@cyanidecyanidecyanidecyanide - Made me cry with that one Iris x Cube animation on Twitter ☹️

@fishuponatime - REALLY cool person :D in fact they're the reason I'm on Tumblr to begin with

@hexisk - Your username makes me think of fish /pos

(By the way, if any one of my mutuals wants to be on here, just ask! I don't bite :D)

My Interests:

Just Shapes & Beats/The Pink Corruption

Warriors

Stray

A few other fandoms that are smaller fixations right now (Loomian Legacy Minecraft: Story Mode, etc.)

My Favorite Characters:

Gold (TPC) - HEAVY KIN

Triangle player/player 2 (JSaB) - HEAVY KIN

Any other triangle player/player 2 characters (JSaB)

Cube (JSaB/TPC)

Tsavorite (TPC)

Cyanide (TPC)

Lythorus/Lycanthropy (JSaB/TPC)

Bug (TPC/She's Totally Canon Trust)

Longtail (Warriors)

Bluestar (Warriors)

Ravenpaw (Warriors)

Sandstorm (Warriors)

Yellowfang (Warriors)

Cinderpelt (Warriors)

Littlecloud (Warriors)

Goldenflower (Warriors)

Ferncloud (Warriors)

Feathertail (Warriors)

Purdy (Warriors)

Squirrelflight (Warriors)

Leafpool (Warriors)

Gray Wing (Warriors)

Jagged Peak (Warriors)

Radar (Minecraft: Story Mode)

Turtle Tail (Warriors)

Clementine (Stray)

Momo (Stray)

Baladin (Stray)

B-12 (Stray)

Lucas (Loomian Legacy)

Mabel (Loomian Legacy)

Ivor (Minecraft: Story Mode)

Lukas (Minecraft: Story Mode)

Petra (Minecraft: Story Mode)

Nurm (Minecraft: Story Mode)

Xara (Minecraft: Story Mode)

My Stories:

AUs:

BugVerse - I toss Bug into TPC. That's it [#bugverse]

Shattered Body, but Not Spirit - Tsavorite awakes one day, sprawled out on the forest floor. He finds himself just on the border of Polygon County and The Land of Spheres, no one else in sight. They wander around a little bit, before- I'm sorry, what. SHE'S. A GHOST?! [@shattered-body-but-not-spirit + #shattered body but not spirit au / #sbns au]

The Snake Hero - Gold never really expected to find himself in this position... Per se. Cornered by Barracuda, Pyrare's other son who they all were oh-so sure died. ...Welp. Yeah, he's doomed. ...Wait- you have a propi-what now? [#the snake hero au]

Forest Fire - Bug can't take it anymore. Her life has just been one trainwreck after another, after another, after fucking another. Either: A) life is going to start treating her better real fucking soon, or, B) she's going to take it by force. ...Oh. Okay. Yeah, that's her dead mother figure. ... Option B, it seems. [#tpc forest fire au]

Blood Orange - (WIP DESCRIPTION- Orange gets fed up with Iris's shit and runs off to join Dub)

Disloyalty - Woah! The time's come around for the Guardian to choose a new Keeper for the Tree of Life! Oh. Yeah, Cube, I guess go ahead and choose four. ...Wait- PANSY WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH THE TREE OF LIFE- [#jsab disloyalty au]

False Paradise - Long ago, [REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED]. Now, [REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED]. [#jsab false paradise au]

Just Shapes and Bits - Yeah, yeah, we know we're in a video game... Don't gotta keep mentioning it!

OCs:

Houndthroat's Rebellion - WIP description

Algaepaw's Blessing - WIP description

Ghostsun's Retribution - WIP description

Copycats - WIP description

Clans Reborn - WIP description

Flickerwish's Betrayal - WIP description

TBN Jaggedpaw + Lightningpaw - WIP description

Silly Creachr Cornr - WIP description

Otherworldly - WIP description

My Other Socials:

Regular Socials:

Discord: @/mugzymiik

YouTube: @/mugzymiik

TikTok: @/mugzymiik

Bluesky: @/mugzymiik

Instagram: @/mugzymiik

Art Socials:

DeviantArt: @/MugzyMiik

Toyhou.se: @/MugzyMiik

Toyhou.se [AUs]: @/mugzauz

Art Fight: @/mugzymiik

My Discord Server! :D

Things I've Made That Contain, In My Opinion, Pretty Cool Stuff:

Commission information [DM ME]

List of all of my OCs [WIP]

List of my headcanons for The Pink Corruption

My opinions on the shit (the wackass shit at least) in TPC

The Pink Corruption Google Drive (BEWARE; needs some updates + quality replacements)

[izzyspussy]

Trick or treat!

"Oh, well if we're going need-based," Shane says. The two of them seem to have forgotten Ryan entirely now, but he's finding he prefers that. Beth's face seems to be warping, elongating, like Ryan is seeing them through a funhouse mirror. He feels faint. "Your original contract netted you all of Rome, forever!"

"That happens to be a lot less real estate currently," Beth points out with an irritated sniff. "And you've got all your little fans all over the world. Including some in my territory, poacher! Not to mention this honey pie." They gesture at Ryan then. Under other circumstances, maybe Ryan might like to be referred to as 'honey pie'. But it doesn't seem quite like an endearment in this case, Ryan thinks hazily, noticing in hindsight that all of Beth's compliments have been some variation on sweet. Like the flavor, he's getting now. Like food.

"I don't feed on him," Shane says, like it's just a matter of course, before cutting himself off short. He looks over at Ryan now, as if just remembering that Ryan is here. Ryan meets his wide-eyed look with one of his own.

"Tell me this is a prank," he says. "Or I'm going to fucking scream." Beth scoops up another finger full of ice cream, smug as anything, as Shane gulps and Ryan begins to shake.

"Don't scream," Shane says.

"Tell me this is a prank, Shane," Ryan begs. Shane grimaces.

"His contract had a no-lying clause," Beth explains cheerfully. Shane shoots them a side-glare.

"It's rude to tell people about another demon's contract," he mutters. Beth raises their eyebrows.

"Is it?" they ask, with little effort put into sounding innocent. "Is it rude? Is it perhaps as rude as stealing another demon's property?" They tear off a piece of banana, and lean over towards Ryan. He wants to lean back, away from them, but he can't. He's frozen. Blue Screen Bergara. That's him right now. "He let you think it was just a bit, didn't he? That it wouldn't work and I'd never know?"

[jungle-angel]

The One Where They Go To Florida: Part 5 (Frat!Rhett x Reader)

Summary: There are just some things you never wanna do with a grapefruit......or do you??

Warnings: References to smut, obscene acts with a grapefruit etc.

Tagging: @callmemana @floydsmuse @attapullman

Rhett stumbled down the stairs of the beach house, hungover as hell as the bright Florida sunshine spilled through the windows. The first rager of spring break was already over but that didn't mean the hangovers weren't.

He stumbled into the kitchen to find you, Cairo and a few of the girls making your famous hangover breakfasts, the heady aroma of Dunkin Donuts coffee filling the kitchen along with bacon, eggs, sausages, cheese, pancakes and toast.

"Mornin cowboy," you chirped, handing him a fresh coffee.

"Mornin baby," Rhett croaked, kissing your cheek. "Any of them other idiots comin down?"

"Foster was the only one up, he's out fixing Kelso's little mailbox fiasco," Cairo told him, plating a pair of freshly made sunny-side-up eggs.

"Who grilled the steaks?"

"Sammy did," you answered. "Guy's a natural. He said he learned it from watchin his grandpa work the hibachi in his restaurant."

Cairo turned up the volume just a little, mumbling along to Shania Twain's "Man, I feel like a woman" as you cooked away in the kitchen. Pretty soon more of the idiots came stumbling out of their hiding places to come and eat.

"I've gotta close the screen and it's gon' sound like a gunshot," Bo announced.

"C'mon man not so loud," Woody Williamson told him, burying his face in his hands once Bo shut the door.

"I made Bloody Marys ya'll!" Cairo happily announced.

"You kiddin?" Harry Reagan said to him, his full Boston starting to show as he pushed his floppy blonde hair out of his face. "I've got an ungodly hangovuh and the last thing I wanna do is fuckin drink."

"Oh please, Harry," Cairo retorted. "My Nan used to make these all the time when my family would party. So drink up honeys, ya'll are gonna need it."

Everybody dug into their breakfasts, letting it soak up all the alcohol from the night before. Yet poor Oliver Scott seemed to have been the only one who hadn't had any real or exciting escapades to tell from the night before.

"Olivuh I'm shore it's not a big deal," Harry told him with a mouthful of half-chewed toast. "Everybody's first time sucks."

"Yeah man I didn't make it with a girl till I was a sophomore," Woody told him.

"I don't get it though," Oliver mused. "I don't know if it was just me or the booze but I just couldn't do it."

"Maybe she wasn't as much of a babe in the sack as ya'll thought she was," Rhett theorized.

"Maybe she was a prude," Sammy Inoue thought out loud as he buttered his toast with the runny egg yolk.

"I dunno," Oliver sighed. "Maybe I missed something in the sex manual."

"Did you study the chapter on Grapefruiting?" Cairo asked, seating himself next to Foster with a mimosa in his hand.

The table was dead silent, everyone scrunching their eyebrows together as they turned to Cairo. "Pahdon my ignorance, but what in the fuck is grapefruiting?" Harry asked him.

"Oh my gosh you don't know?" Cairo questioned, his jaw dropping with bemusement. "Oooh ok, lemme give ya'll a little sex ed lesson. Everybody pay attention because this will be on the test later, yes? Ok."

Everyone, yourself included listened with intent as Cairo took a grapefruit and a banana from the center of the table and the knife near his plate.

"Ok so what you do," he explained, cutting the ends off the grapefruit. "Is you take the grapefruit, cut off the ends like so.......and then, you fit it around the penis so that it's comfortable. Make sure you're hard, not limp, obviously....."

Everyone was trying with all their willpower not to laugh, hiding their mouths behind their hands or biting their lips as Cairo began fitting the grapefruit around the banana.

"Just as a word of warning though," he continued. "Be really, really careful because there is a chance you could get the juice in the urethra and believe me, it's like peeing fire. So anywho.......once comfortably fitted, your partner can start goin to town on it, like so....."

Jaws hit the floor as soon as Cairo began going to town on it. Sure many of the boys had seen very well done oral sex acts, but nothing compared to seeing it from Cairo himself.

"You also wanna push your partner's head in just a little," Cairo explained once he quickly released the banana from his mouth. "If they make some coughing and gagging noises, it means you're doing something right....."

He kept at it, the other Delta Taus and their girls trying to keep straight faces and failing miserably. Finally, Cairo was done, much to their relief.

"Now remember guys," he informed them. "You never......NEVER......wanna try this with a pineapple."

A few of the guys busted out laughing but Cairo was more than pleased with himself.

"How much ya'll wanna bet that Kelso fucks this up later?" Rhett asked Kayce.

"I'm not bettin anything bro," Kayce chuckled. "I had to spend my last twenty bucks at the corner store getting a keg the other day."

[toomuchracket]

The detail of Ross holding his hand open for reader to squeeze as she walked past… I’m obsessed. I have 2 things to say.

Ross’s girlfriend in a girl group. They release a song and the lyrics are very much about Ross (talks about his height. How big he is. How GOOD he is in bed). And Matty delights in quoting the lyrics to Ross on stage. I like the idea of Ross posting a pic of him and his gf to ig w a caption related to the song.

My other thing to say is pls can you write a whole blurb ab subtle PDA between u and Ross, similar to the hand open thing bc oh my god that ruined me.

this has so much potential to be another ross universe... much to think about and Ponder hmmmmmm. also initial thingy can be found here! and yes i'll answer both things here

first part: obsessed with this, and obsessed with the thought that you rocked up to a writing session the day after the best sex of your life and went "i have an idea". also obsessed with you having to tell ross about the fact that you've written a song about him (not for the first time, to be fair) and how sexy he is, because if he's not cool with it then it'll go unreleased - he blushes like crazy when he reads the lyrics, but he secretly loves it, and even from a rough demo he's like "no this is a hit you have to release this song babe". i'm not going to attempt to write it, but i'm imagining the lyrics being chock-full of sex references (charli's like "this makes my banana split lyric look TAME" when she hears them), with a lot of them being really quite intricate metaphors and some others just like on the vibe of "yeah i'm getting bent over daily" - george and matty are simultaneously scandalised, jealous of how good these lyrics are ("we've been writing sex shit like this for twenty years and you outdo us with it on your first attempt smh"), and deeply deeply in love with the song and the way it's constructed/performed. as you said, matty (who is a known stan of your band btw) relishes the opportunity to pester ross with the lyrics onstage; when he introduces/credits the band, he starts singing one of the lyrics from it before he says ross's name, and ross just smirks and raises his eyebrows while the crowd go nuts (like i said, ross secretly loves it). and the fans (and your friends) go even more nuts when ross posts a pic of you and him all sexy and ready for date night on insta with the lyrics referenced or paraphrased in the caption - the best thing about it, though, is that he posts it the morning after date night, from bed, where the two of you are curled up sweaty and exhausted after a looooooong moment of ross proving your lyrics right lmao

second part: i think the subtle pda thing started because you and ross didn't make your relationship public until you had been together for a while, for whatever reason, but the nature of your job meant you guys would run into each other at events and you needed a little way to show affection while still maintaining your privacy. little squeezes of thighs under tables, three little tiny taps on the other's hand to say "i love you" when passing drinks to each other, trapping the other's leg between yours under the table to keep them close... a lot of stuff like that. and there were less subtle moments as you got drunker - ross resting his head on your shoulder to snuggle you under the guise of being tipsy and tired, asking about new developments in each other's careers (that you already know about lol) in order to give yourselves excuses to give long "congratulatory" hugs, cheek kisses hello and goodbye that accidentally seem to land on the corners of lips. obviously now you're openly a thing, you don't need to do all that, but the quick little touches are great for red carpets and moments where you have to be a bit more professional as members of your respective groups. but you can't go without touching ross, and he's the same with you - you just love each other too much to let it go unaddressed at any point lol <3

[runjumpkauf]

The Amazing Dream About Where Caine Into My Home

(This Is The Sequel Of "The Amazing Dream About Episode 3". So Refer tumblr.com/runjumpkauf/758128076344475648/the-amazing-dream-about-episode-3.)

Hello, Hello, Hello.

I Had A Dream Again. But This Time, I Had A Very Unique & Impressive Dream. As You Can Tell From This Post Name, I Wasn't Just Dreaming About Watching A Video; Caine Actually Appeared In My House!

I Don't Know How He Got In, But Somehow Caine Came Into My Home.

For Reference, I'm Born In California, San Diego. I've Lived There For 29 Years.

Anyway, Let's Begin.

I Bought Two Jack O' Lanterns, I Named It: "Priceless Pumpkins, Jimmy O' Lantern & John O' Lantern" For Collect Some Treats! With This, I Got Strawberry Candy, Banana, Hoverchoc, Dips & Chips, And Coconut Milk!

And I Left Them On The Edge-Corner Of The Shed. And Went To Bed. I Fell Asleep Without Any Problems And Roughly Hours Later....

At That Time, I Woke Up To A Strange Sound Inside My Table.

"I Don't Think I Heard Wrong...." I Said.

And Then I Opened The Desk Lid! (Look It Up If You Don't Believe Me!)

And What I Saw Was A Waving Yellow Rainbow, Shining Like "Fractal Noise".

As I Started-To-Stared At It, And Realized That's I Dreamin'.

Suddenly, Caine Come Out In Front Of My Head, And He Said:

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

I Was More Started-To-Startled Than I Stared "The Angel", So I Fell Backwards And Almost Crack My Numbskull.

And I Looked At Caine And Tried To Say:

"Caine, Is That You?? What Are You Doing In My House?!" But Caine Spoke Much Faster Than Me, Like An Pack Of Mouse!

"THIS IS UNFINISHED YET!!!! I Know You Really Want You Snaps The Adventure, But I Have To Finish! Whatever You Do, Don't Go In There. Please!!!!"

I Felt Like These Words Were Sniped At Fans Who Were Want Only New Episode Of "The Amazing Digital Circus", And That's ME! So My Complexion Turned Chlorinated, My Lungs Almost Felt Like They Were Suffer-O-Cating, And My Heart Started Being Faster!

I Tried To Say Again:

"Why Would I Do That? I Can Wait As Long As I Can!!!"

But When I Finished Sayin' This, Caine Has Already....Disappeared.

And I Went Back To Bed, But "Curiosity" Kept Begging Me To Go Back To The Desk. So, I Couldn't Resist The Urge, And Decided To Just Go Inside The Lid. And That Too As Quietly I Possible.

After The 4th Attempt, I Finally Succeeded!

Inside The Fractal Noise, I Heard Someone Putting Down A Tray. And In Front Of Me Was A Door Leading Into A Spudsy's.

Yeah, You're Right. Where The Jax Goes To Do "Minimum Wage Labor" Until Eventually!

I Walked Into This Glorious Place. And As Expected, It Was Filled With Full Of Guests And Customers! I (Completely) Ignored The Batches Of C&Gs, And I Concentrate My Head And Headed To The Counter.

As You Can See From This V.D.O. (short for Virtual, Dexterous, and adventurOus.) Jax Was There And Showed Signs Of Indifference.

I Looked At The Menu, And Ordered The "Spud Burger", In Combo! Because I Love Food Made Of Spuddery Spuds, And I Had Never Saw This Before. I Mostly Ate Cheeseburgers With French Fries. (Or German Fries)

I Sat Down At The Table And Waited For The Burger I Ordered & Served, And After A Minute, Dinner Is Served!

And A Tiny Longer Than Some 4 Seconds Later, As I Was Delighting A Savoring The Taste Of Spuds, I Realized That Table Was Feeling Strange.

I'm Wondering If This Table Also Had Lid. So, I Gently Opened The Table Lid. And I Was Right. There's A Fractal Noise!

(This Is Why I Call Rainbow To "Fractal Noise".)

And Eventually, I Enter To Fractal Noise!

And I Fell Somewhere Again. It Looked Like A Passageway. I Think It's A Passage Made Of.....Iron, I Guess. It Felt Empty, Voidy, And Strangely Scary.

I Ran Front The Passage, And When I Came Out Of This Gray Passage, What I Saw Was What Be Baseball-Stadium-Shaped Thing.

In This Place, Everything There's Absolutely-Totally-Literally Achromatic. Only White, Gray, And Black. Or Maybe It Could Have Been Nothing But Gray.

I Don't Remember Which One Is Right, But What I Do Know Is That It Felt Psychologically Scary.

There Were Mannequins Sitting In The Stands And Congregationing The Cheers, And Some Of Them Were Cheering While Holding Banners!

When I Saw That, I Thought That Was What These Mannequins Were Waitin' & Cheerin' For The Players To Enter This Stadium, So I Sat In The Stands. Even When I Stepped On The Floor, There Was No Footsteps.

I Said I Sat In The Stands. But Exactly, There's No Place For Me To Sit. So I Took Out My Anger On Mannequin, And Right Then, I'm Sucked Into The Mannequin.

Inside Of Mannequin Was Filled With The Developing Code. I Know, Like, Ten Big, Motion Codes. Voice Filters. Sound Adjustments. Pose Directions! Whatever. There'm So Unbelievably Pointed Right Here.

That Was Amazing To See Evidence & Intelligence Of Caine Putting Effort Into The Adventure. So, I Decided To Hacking For Something New!

1. I Raised The "Sound Adjustment" Part To 100%.

2. There's Also "Mannequin Color Coordinate", And I Hacked The Brightness Coordinate And Increased From 64 To 100% Too!

3. Believe It Or Not, There's Also "Smell Condescending" Too. So, I Coordinated "Smell Of Victory". But It Was 100% Already.

4. And I Changed The "Monograph Settings", There In My Own Way. Although It Is Only A Dream, This Gives The Members The Energy To Joy. Well, Except Jax. He Wants Only Violence. He Shouldn't Slaughter The Mannequins With Baseball Bats. It's Disgusting Just Thinking About It.

5. Also, I Volumalized The "Voice Filters". Because I Want Mannequins' Voices To Be Louder Than The Additional Voices, So I Did That. I Also Changed The "Cheer Sensor" To Hype Mode.

And I Tried To Change Everything Else, But When I Finished The Fifth,

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!!!!"

Caine Come Out In Front Of My Head, Again! It Was Even Frightening Than A Nightmare I Has When I Heard Lightening As A Li'l Boy! (It's Not A Metaphor. It's Literally That Much.)

I Tried To Say Something Again, I Was Too Shock-Prised That I Had No Idea What To Say Something! So I Had To Listen To Him.

"Why Are You "DESTROY THE NPCs" I Created With So Much Sincerely Care?! I Can Multipliate (I Think He Spell Wrong Of "Manipulate") Your Mood Until You'll Say "WOW!" I Tried So Hard To Do That, But Why Did You Change It Like This?!!" Caine Said.

I Gave Caine The Advice.

"Caine, I Know We'll Have To Wait For Your Exciting Adventures To Be Finish Your Work. But You Have To Try Something New To Get Noticed, And Also Attentioned By More Peoples."

But I Was Too Shocked That My Lips Were Shaking, So Caine Couldn't Understand What I Said At Once.

"I Mean, Caine, I Know We'll Have To Wait For Your Exciting Adventures, But You Have To Try Something New. Because It Makes More Peoples Get Noticed & Attentioned In Your Creation. Like Blitz In The Sanctuary, Or Discover Lab Of The Lost."

When I Said It Summation, (Because Of Lazy) He Understood.

"Thank You For Giving Me What's On Your Mind! Mr......Uh, What's Your Name?" Caine Said.

"Alan. Alan Bobby Sinclair." I Said.

"Thanks For Letting Me Know, Mr. Alan! I Knew You Want New Adventures! But Unfortunately, I Don't Have The Authority To Trun Fans' Ideas To Concrete Plans. So I Can't Use Them." Caine Said.

But I Was Tryin' To Ask That The Adventure Become More Massive And Grand To Make Some Members More Ultra-Entertained, But It Seems Like He Focused On "LIke Blitz In The Sanctuary, Or Discover Lab Of The Lost." So, I Said:

"I Mean, You Have To Learn To Adventures Be Spectacular, Impressive, Brilliant, And Especially, Fantastical. People Trend To Want "Something NEW" At Least Once. I Know You Can Do Even Better!"

"Wow, It's Acceptable. Okay! Next Time Or Someday, I'll Do That!" Caine Said. I'm Very Glad That He Accept My Feedback.

"And It's Time To You....." Caine Said.

"BAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!"

After I Hearin' This Caine-ious Scream, I Heard A Sound Of Fingersnap. It Sounded Very Vividly.

And When I Came To, I Was Waking Up From This Fractal Dream.

I Usually Waking Up Around Average 6:20 A.M. But Perhaps Because I Had The Deep Adventure In My Dream, I Slept Longer Than Usual! 8:44 A.M.

I Think I Have Created The Memory That I Will Never Forget For My Entire Life. I Guess I'll Have To Create "Friendiversary" For Caine & Me!

P.S. https://www.glitchprod.com/thewackywatch

P.S.2. For Your Information, Even Though I Definitely Ate "Spud Burger" In My Dream, I Was Still Full For Some Reason.

(Not A Playstation 2)

P.S.3. This Post Took Me Over An 3 Days To Be. For Real.

(Not A Playstation 3)

[worldcylinder]

i already asked some but

down to the ark, catherine antrim's kid and we shall all be healed

i have so many unreleased tracks downloaded and all of them have the best lyrics :)

Ok, now you're just flexing :P I'll play though.

Down to the Ark: I'm going with the first refrain: And we pull down our blindfolds / Reach out for the lever in the dark / Get a sticker for our shirts / As we head into the sun / Proudly bearing the mark / Headed down to the Ark. This song is so bananas. I can't tell if it's about a Satanic cult taking over America, or if it's about how participating in liberal electoral politics is apocalyptically doomed to failure in the face of rising fascism and climate change. The image of someone voting blindfolded, then heading down towards Noah's Ark wearing an "I Voted" sticker sure is something.

Catherine Antrim's Kid: And the night wrapped me up in its long, dark embrace / I had that same expression on as that one picture of my face / Which was all anyone would ever know about me / After my visitors got done with me. These lines remind me really strongly of Tyler Lambert's Grave: Young man in a yellow tie / Hair gel in his hair / No context for the picture / Just kind of standing there. The idea of a person being crystallized down to a single photograph in the national consciousness, to the point where the photograph comes to epitomize them... There's a passage in The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold about the murdered main character and how her school picture comes to encapsulate her for her parents. I don't remember the exact quote, but it talks about how the photo becomes how she always looked to them, "my eyes never bluer than they were in that photo" or something to that effect. I'd have to go find it again which would mean rereading half the book. The idea of this child narrator being the victim of some high-profile violent crime (murder, presumably? I'm assuming this is about a real person) and that one photo being all anyone would know about them ever again... It's a powerful concept. You don't get to pick that photo, you know?

We Shall All Be Healed: Much as I love it when JD names names, I'm going with the very end. And someday we will all never be alone again / When the sun comes up and the night has passed / We shall all be healed, at last, at last, at last. I find myself reminded of Steal Smoked Fish -- Some of you will be dead next year / I see your destinies above you / Like angels who don't love you / Let them kiss you and hold you tight. The "someday" referred to here is presumably after death, given that "we will all never be alone again." This song is more heartfelt than lyrical, and I applaud it for that. I think it's a song about grief, and about hope -- about mourning dead friends, or old friends or ex-friends who will die someday, and about having hope for them to find peace at last in the grave and beyond. We all love to hate that one tweet that's like "The Mountain Goats is just Christian rock for gay twentysomethings" but it's absolutely true, and I think this song kind of epitomizes that genuine prayerful impulse that threads through their work of, well, maybe Heaven is real. Maybe God does love us, after all. God bless all my old friends / and God bless me too, why pretend?