#if tom told greg he wanted out i actually kind of think greg would get out with him

[gregkinz]

ok but like. okay. okay but like Greg WOULD go live in a trailer park with Tom lol. Greg would follow Tom anywhere for love lmao

[ichorai]

hell, yeah ; roman roy ; part four (m).

pairing ; roman roy x f!reader

synopsis ; pain was an old friend for the both of you.

words ; 18.0k

themes ; fluff, angst, drama, slowburn, smut, childhood friends to lovers

warnings / includes ; depictions of mental and physical abuse, mentions of death, unprotected penetrative sex, a lot of sexual/suicidal jokes and general foul language, tons of business talk, talks of nazis/fascism/conservatism, really morally grey shit, roman’s implied demisexuality, kendall & reader's popsicle war, mencken himself is a warning

series masterlist. main masterlist.

A conservative political fundraiser weekend was the last place on earth you wanted to be, but hell—Logan wanted you there, so who were you to say no to the boss? Besides, hubs like this were always good to sniff out who would be the most dangerous people on the red spectrum.

The hall was decked out in lavish decorations—chandeliers and golden ornaments and marble statues every which way you looked. It was full to the brim with mingling politicians of all kinds: the kinds being old white men, or…

Hm. Seemed like it was practically all old white men other than a handful of women wandering around. White women, of course.

You and Shiv locked eyes for a moment. Though the two of you shared many common political interests, at least much more than the rest of the family, you often found yourself on the opposite ends of agreement. But today, in a sea of men with confederate flags for dicks, the two of you found solace in one another. 

“You can smell the panic,” she told you. “Berlin Bunker vibes.”

“They’re scrambling,” you replied. “Nobody was expecting this. Maybe they should’ve.”

Beside you, Roman cuffed your shoulder. “Ooh—the libtard and the soc-commie. How does it feel to be spelunking in the elephant’s asshole?”

“Calling me a communist isn’t the insult you think it is,” you told Roman, rolling your eyes.

“Mmh. I’m sure they would’ve loved you in the 1930s.”

Shiv crossed her arms. “We’re just corporate observers.”

“The weekend isn’t over yet—we’ll get our white cis-male stank all over you,” Roman commented snidely.

It was then that Greg came up to the group, expression muddled with confusion. ��Hey, guys, some guy with an undercut just called me a ‘soy boy’. What, uhm, I don’t really know what that means? What is this, actually? Like what’s everyone here for?”

“It’s just a nice political conference of like-minded donors and intellectuals,” Roman told his cousin.

“I wouldn’t call them intellectuals, exactly,” you said with a frown. You were pretty sure half of these men owned podcasts talking about how toxic masculinity is fake, and the other half were so old they didn’t know how to turn the brightness up on their own phone. 

“We’re picking the next president,” Tom piped up, which made Shiv arch a brow.

“That’s not… that’s not really how it works.”

Roman shrugged. “No, sure, but… it kinda is.”

“Is that—is that constitutional?” Greg queried, looking around worriedly, suddenly wondering if he was participating in yet another illegal activity.

“Welcome to the one percent, Greg,” you told him with a sigh. “Where you don’t have to worry about the constitution anymore.”

Roman pinched your cheek. “Awh, look at you, embracing the right-wing traditions! I love that for you.”

Wrinkling your nose, you swatted his hand away. “Six months till election day and still no candidate. Surprised everyone hasn’t unanimously agreed on putting the vice prez up on a pedestal.”

“Steady old plow horse, huh?” Roman said, directing his gaze to the old vice president, Dave Boyer. “He licks his lips too much. Like a—like a cartoon bear when there’s a picnic hamper nearby.”

You laughed at that, and Roman shot you a grin. 

“I’m going to go take a tour. Check out the fresh meat,” he told you, and you nodded. 

“I’ll be near the entrance if you need me.”

With that, he set off to mingle, hands shoved into his pockets to stop him from his habitual itching and scratching.

“Who are you thinking?” Shiv leaned forward to ask.

“Boyer. Seems the most obvious, easiest choice,” you replied, meeting her scrutinizing stare.

“Are you saying that because he is the easiest choice, or because he’d be the easiest to win against?” she asked with a sharp smile.

There was a momentary pause. “Why, who do you think they should put up?”

“I say we go blue.”

Your mouth fell open as you struggled to find the words to respond with. “Shiv, that just—that’d never work.”

“Why not?”

“You realize ATN is fucking—it’s fueled by everything right-wing! For us to suddenly bat for dems would bring nothing but angry conservatives and we’d lose a fuck-ton of shareholder money.” You shook your head. “Look, Shiv, I don’t like them as much as you do. But forcing your dad to swing blue is just a terrible idea.”

Her features hardened. “The least we could do is try. Right?”

Before you could respond, Roman came hurrying back, phone clutched tightly in his hand. He shoved the screen up against his sister’s face. “Did you know about this, you withholding bitch?”

“Uh, what?” 

“You know Glyn, the, uh, the Brexit pervert?” Roman said, gesturing to the tall British chap with a large nose. “Yeah, he just sent this to me—apparently our mother is marrying Peter Munion.”

Both you and Shiv doubled with surprise. “What?” she asked. “Who’s Peter Onion?”

“I don’t fucking know. I wonder if that first-born fucker knew,” Roman said. 

“I mean, if you guys didn’t know, I’m sure Connor wouldn’t have known, either,” you ventured, glancing over at the eldest sibling chattering to two other politicians about abolishing taxes.

Snorting, Roman replied, “No, the other first-born fucker. Kenny Dick.”

“Ah. Right.”

“Call him.” Shiv nudged her brother.

With a hum, Rome whipped his phone out and called his brother, putting it on speaker phone for the two of you to hear.

“Yeah, what?” Kendall’s voice came through on the second ring.

“Hey. Just wanted you to know that new dad just dropped.”

There was a brief crackle of silence. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Mummy’s getting married, you dingus.”

“Did you know?” Shiv leaned forward to query.

Roman snickered. “Of course he didn’t know, Ken bores the shit out of mom.”

You remembered one Christmas when you were children, the family was exchanging gifts—Kendall had set down a little red box in front of Caroline so she could open it. Something hand-made? You’d always wondered. The wrapping was shoddy. It was forgotten and pushed off to the side in favor of prettier, more expensive-looking presents. You were pretty sure Caroline hadn’t even seen the gift. Or maybe she did. Maybe she just didn’t care to open it. Nonetheless, Kendall, thirteen years of age, didn’t try to give it to her again. That night, when the servants were tossing away all the stray wrappings and ribbons, you caught sight of the crumpled red box chucked into a black garbage bag. You didn’t dwell on it, because Roman had heckled you away soon after to ‘watch’ Shiv play with her new dollhouse.

“What are you even talking about?” Kendall asked. He sounded angry. “You mean, she’s marrying Rory?”

“Uh, no. She took the view ‘Fuck Rory’,” Shiv said, glib.

Sneering, Kendall abruptly changed the subject. “Hey, Shiv, is it true you’re at the hate-fest? Burning books and measuring skulls down in Virginia?” 

“Yeah,” Shiv deadpanned. “What are you doing with your weekend? Planning to send us all to jail? Your favorite past-time?”

Before it could escalate into a full-on argument, Roman pulled the phone close to him and said, “Alright, just wanted to let you know that Mummy still doesn’t love you. Bye, Ken!”

With that, he hung up.

“Do you think your mom is going to invite me to her wedding?” you asked, wrinkling your nose at the prospect of going all the way across the ocean when you had so much work piled up. “And would she be offended if I didn’t come?”

“Oh, she’s definitely inviting you. You know how she is. Needs everyone who knows of her existence to see how rich and pompous she is. She’d have a grudge against you if you didn’t come,” Roman told you.

You frowned, and Roman laughed.

“We can be each other’s date. It’ll be fun. Don’t worry about it.” He rubbed your shoulder, and began leading you off to the bar to get some drinks. 

“Your mother would love that. Us, being each other’s dates? She’d gloat in our faces that she’s known all along,” you mused with a grin, before leaning against the counter and asking the bartender for your preferred drink.

“Or she’d be too self-absorbed to notice. And it’s okay for her to be that way because it’s her own wedding.” Pulling a sour face, Roman shook his head. “Blegh. I can’t believe she’s actually marrying someone named Bunion.”

You laughed softly. “Munion.”

“Whatever.”

Before either of you could say anything else, a figure approached the bar, standing just beside Roman.

“Hey guys,” said Mencken. “What’s up?”

Both you and Roman turned your heads to him. He shot you a glance, noting the unimpressed raised eyebrow.

“Oh, okay. Yeah, it’s the—it’s the ghost pepper. The spicy new flavor, Mencken.” Rome gave the taller man a onceover, drawing a long sip from his glass.

Mencken’s keen eyes darted from Rome to you, and back to Roman, scrutinizing. Burning. You couldn’t quite gauge what he was thinking, but knowing all the hot bullshit he liked to spew on the internet, you were sure it’d be nothing good.

Him as president? That’d be like putting a mask on Hitler and crowning him King of the nation.

“So what’s your deal? Most people here want to fuck me or kill me.” Mencken asked, leaning against the bar. “I’m hoping it’s the former.”

You weren’t quite sure if that was directed to you or Roman, but you were disgusted, either way. 

Roman clicked his tongue to the roof of his mouth. “Ooh, wow. I always found it hard to care about politics, so… I trust in Y/N to have enough opinions for the both of us.”

He gave you a fond pat on the shoulder and you spared your friend a stiff smile.

“Right, Y/N. It’s nice to meet you,” Mencken said, sticking his hand out. 

Staring down at his extended palm, you took a second to consider flat out ignoring him. But, not wanting to cause a scene, you shook it firmly, nodding curtly. “Likewise,” you lied.

When you pulled away, you made the conscious choice to discreetly wipe your palm onto your pants.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. The both of you, actually.”

“Oh, really?” you deadpanned, straightfaced.

“Tabloids never shut up.”

“They hardly ever do.”

Mencken crossed his arms. “To be honest, I always thought you two were just a PR stunt. You know the vibes… look away from all the sexual harassment, because the prince and princess of Waystar are being all snuggly at a charity event! But now that I’m looking at you in person…”

His words struck a nerve within you. A muscle in your jaw twitched. 

Roman laughed, nervous. “We aren’t—we aren’t, like, a thing. I mean we—we kind of are, but we’re also not really—”

The older man whistled sharply, lifting a hand to stop him, as if he were a dog. “No need to explain to me. I’ve been down that road many, many times.”

“Roman and I are close,” you told him, voice steely. “The details are none of your, or the public’s concern.”

The way Mencken smiled was wolfish. Greedy, almost. 

“Alright, here’s my party trick,” he said to the two of you. “Tell me who your enemy is, and I’ll tell you who you are.”

A part of you wanted to laugh. Where did he get that from, an alpha male, raw meat-eating youtuber’s podcast?

Roman sucked in a breath, amused. “Oh-kay. Let’s put a pin in that one.” He took another sip. “I’ve seen your poll numbers. You’re dark-horsin’ shit. Are people buying your whole… thing?”

Facism. That’s what Roman was alluding to. This man was a fucking fascist. The two of you were entertaining a fascist! You couldn’t believe what you’ve come to. 

Mencken chuckled. “They better buy it. Or I’ll send them to the Gulag.”

“Jesus Christ,” you hissed, wrinkling your nose. 

“No, no, no. Not work camps. Just—summer camps. It’ll be like summer camps,” Mencken said. 

“Summer camps but with beatings, right?” Roman asked, unsure if the man beside him was joking or not.

“No, no. Shh—no beatings.”

Mencken winked. He fucking winked! To your surprise, Roman laughed, genuine and chesty. 

“Wow. Tough crowd, huh?” Mencken said, meeting your unamused eyes. “You always struck me as the quiet little country mouse. No wonder you’re sticking to the big-gun citymen.”

“Well, I’m sorry if I don’t find labor camps all that funny,” you remarked, drumming your fingers along the countertop. 

“I’m just kidding. We’re joking around.” He elbowed Roman’s arm. “Is she always this uptight?”

You had to admit that it stung just a bit when Roman tipped his head back and laughed. “It’s what I like most about her. Ain’t that right, schnookums?”

You sniffed in disdain, shrugging off his hand when he placed it on your shoulder. You weren’t a huge fan of how… warm Roman was to him. It felt vile, and it felt wrong. 

Tilting his head, Mencken smacked his lips together and started up, “So, uh… do you guys know yet? Who takes over?”

Roman stopped sipping his drink and set it down. “What’s that?”

“When they send the old battletoad off to the hoosegow.” His eyes glinted. “Your dad, Logan. Admiral Grope Boat.”

“Yeah, no, he’s not… that’s actually not happening,” said Roman. He scratched at the back of his head. 

Mencken cackled at that. “Hah, yeah, that’s right. Stick to the line. That’s good.”

The two of them smiled at each other.

A sudden pit of nausea started curling within your stomach. 

Boyer and Salgado approached the bar, striking up a conversation with Mencken, effectively roping his attention away from the two of you. You downed your drink and leaned against Roman with a mild hum.

“I really thought this event would be more interesting,” you admitted.

Shoulders shaking with his chuckling, Roman asked you, “What, did you think there’d be a gun-slinging showdown? Old western-style?”

“Well, yeah. What else do conservatives do?”

The two of you snickered under your breath. 

It was then that Shiv came to stand by you, ordering a drink for herself. “Hey. What’ve you guys sniffed out?”

You offered her half a shrug, glancing over at Mencken. With a lowered voice, you said, “A lot of rotten apples in the orchard.”

The siblings both hummed at that—Shiv in agreement, Roman in amusement. 

“Look at us, playing nice,” you overheard Salgado tell Mencken. To your credit, they weren’t quite using their inside voices. “People might think we liked each other.”

“Hey, I’m a conservative! I like tradition,” Mencken protested. “I doff my cap to vice president Boyer’s years of loyal service.”

“Thank you. I believe you used to call me Martin Van Boring.”

Mencken grinned. “Hey, come on! No, I still call you that.”

Nodding, Boyer shifted to speak to everyone else gathered around the bar. “Listen, Mencken and I may differ in some areas, but, uh, we both agree that this is the party of the working class now.”

Shiv pulled an incredulous face, scoffing loud. 

“What? You don’t agree, Shiv?” Boyer asked. “All the richest counties in America are blue. The Democrats and tech hold all the wealth.”

“Oh, yes, because everyone here is scrounging through their couches for loose change,” you snidely commented, coolly meeting Boyer’s gaze. 

The old man licked at his lips, gesturing vaguely with his hands. “Come now, I’m talking about the general public. We don’t count.”

Why not?

“I just think some of us get so high off of owning the libs, we forget to talk policy,” said Salgado.

Mencken snorted. “Yeah, Rick loves to talk policy! What he does is he memorizes a National Review issue from 2012 and then recites it back to you. Cool policy, bro.”

This made Salgado frown. “Mmh, Jeryd hates to talk policy because it would mean, you know, having one.”

Roman whistled sarcastically. “Sick burn, brosef!”

“Oh, no, no. We’re kidding. We are!” Mencken insisted. He smiled at you and Roman. “We like each other. I listen to his speeches every night. Yeah. They help me drop off.”

Out of the three politicians, you had to admit that Salgado was the most appealing. Sure, he was a pushover and really only concerned about his public image rather than what he was promoting, but it was better than Mencken the fascist and Boyer the conservative lip-licker. 

“Maybe it’s boring talking about populist solutions for working families,” said Salgado.

“Rick, come on! You jerked off to Reagan’s headshot for thirty years, and now you’re Tom Joad?” Mencken jeered.

Rolling her eyes, Shiv told you, “God, this shit is so fucking boring.”

Overhearing, Mencken gave the woman a onceover. “What’s that?”

“Hm?” Shiv met his gaze. “No, I’ve just—I’ve seen your thing quite a lot.”

Mencken uncrossed his arms and then crossed them again. He was frowning, brows knitting together—evidently he didn’t quite like being tested.

“And what’s that? What’s my thing?”

“Youtube provocateur bullshit,” Shiv told him with a bitter laugh. “Aristo-populism. ‘Rape is natural, it’s all red pill, baby.’ I’m just—I’m just so fucking over it.”

“Have you read Plato?” asked Mencken. 

Oh, God. Was he really pulling the philosophical literature superiority card? Was he being serious?

“Yeah,” Shiv said in a mocking voice. “Remind me, what happens?”

“Oh, read Plato! Read Plato!” Mencken told her, his manner condescending.

“Don’t want to!” Shiv exclaimed. “I don’t fucking want to!”

Salgado cut in, “See, he doesn’t actually want to have a conversation. He just wants to yell loud enough to get on ATN.”

“Nah! Fuck ATN,” Mencken said. The room fell silent, and all eyes were on him. For a moment, he looked at you and Roman, the two of you watching him with muted interest. You wondered if he was seeking both of your approvals. “No, really, ATN is treated as a bulwark, but it’s dead. It’s basically a pudding cup at 5 PM in the nursing home. It’s status quo bedtime stories to maximize shareholder value.”

Though you didn’t want to agree with any of Mencken’s sentiments, you had to admit that his take on ATN was a valid one. ATN was hardly a reliable source, with its heavy right-wing influences. To you, it was merely a station to feed into the delusions of the older conservative generation. At the thought, you looked over your shoulder to Logan, seated on a table not too far from the bar. You only saw his back, but you wondered if he was listening in.

“Honestly, it doesn’t speak to me,” Mencken continued on. “Doesn’t speak to the people I talk to.”

“And who is it you talk to?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. 

Mencken stared at you for a moment before answering, “People who want to see the truth. See the natural order of things.”

“Natural order. Wow,” you whispered under your breath. With that, you ordered another drink. You couldn’t listen to all this bullshit sober. 

Mencken nodded. “Logan Roy was an icon. But, you know… he’s no longer relevant.”

“Do you recognize this fucker?” Roman asked, shoving the phone in Shiv’s face.

“Nope,” she said.

You peered over his shoulder to see the wedding invitation on his screen, zoomed into his mother’s fiance’s face. 

“Fucking jelly-boned, low-T, pip-pip cheerio fucker,” Roman muttered as he shut the phone off and slid it back into his suit jacket’s pocket.

You pressed the button on the elevator to go up. Logan had called all of you up to the royal suite to discuss options for the next red presidential candidate—something you weren’t at all looking forward to. “He doesn’t look all that bad. Do you think your dad knows?”

The doors slid open and the three of you filed in.

Roman tilted his head. “No. But we have to stop the wedding, right?” 

Both you and Shiv exchanged incredulous looks. 

“Stop obsessing over Mom’s new husband,” Shiv told her brother. “Just get over it. Who cares?”

Narrowing his eyes, Roman asked, “Get over it? It just fucking happened. My mother’s marrying some dickhead, crooked-toothed turnip man.”

“His teeth looked quite nice in the picture, actually—” you began, before falling silent at Roman’s loud groan.

“What’s wrong is how little you care about it, you frozen bitch,” Roman commented off-handedly, making Shiv roll her eyes.

“Oh, poor Rome! His dreams of porking Mom are slipping through his little lubed-up fingers!” she leered, snickering a little.

A frown crossed your features. “It’s okay to care about it, Shiv. I mean… it’s your mom.”

“Something she often forgets,” she murmured, and that marked the end of the conversation.

The elevator rolled to a halt, the doors opening once more to a grand hall. The door to the suite was all the way down, and the three of you made your way there in contemplative silence. Logan was inside to greet you, along with Tom, Hugo, Connor, and Greg (who was awkwardly lingering by the curtained windows). 

“There’s a lot of chat flying around. A lot of flapping,” your godfather said once everyone had settled in. “We need one voice on this, or we could fall apart and hand it to the fuck-fuck donkey gang.”

Donkey gang, obviously meaning the democrats. You spared Shiv a look—she was seated away from her husband, frowning down at her hands.

“So… who do we like?” Logan asked.

Shiv cleared her throat and said, “Shouldn’t we kick it around for a bit? Feels like it’s poised, so if you and Petkus come together, and the other donors follow, it just—”

“Exactly,” Logan deadpanned. “We’re picking. We haven’t got all night.”

Occupying one of the long sofas all on his own, Connor put forth, “I like Connor Roy.”

The room lapsed into silence for a few seconds. Roman smiled, amused.

Calling back to the short conversation you had with Shiv earlier, she said, “Honestly, Dad, I think you go Dems.”

Immediately, the two brothers in the room reacted with incredulity.

“Wow,” Connor scoffed.

“Jesus Christ! What, are we all going to hold hands and sing kumbaya next?” Roman exclaimed. Then, he sat up straighter. “Uhm, I… I kinda like Mencken? But—I know he’s kind of shitty, so if it’s now, I guess I’d say Boyer. But can I also just say that I don’t like Boyer?”

Though you were not at all happy that Roman was leaning for Mencken, you had to agree that Boyer was a safe choice. You crossed your arms. “Hard pass to Mencken. I say we go Boyer. Vice is nice, no?”

Shiv sighed loudly.

“What? What’s with the fucking attitude?” Roman asked.

The redhead held her hands out. “Okay, look, no disrespect, but Boyer was yesterday’s papers. The Dems will run on change and blow him away.”

“Ooh, Mrs. Politics,” crooned Roman. “How many big races did you win as a consultant? Four? Three? Did you win two? One?” He held up his middle finger.

She scowled. “Roman, Boyer is not a winner, and we know that.”

“Okay, then, should we talk to Mencken?” he asked. “See if we can deal?”

Vehement, Shiv said, “Uh, can I just say something? Mmh, no. Mencken is an integralist, nativist fuckhead. He’s toxic! He’s fucking—he’s ‘medicare for all, abortions for none.’ And his idea of diplomacy is shooting roe deer with Viktor Orban and then starting the trade war with China! Look, I know that there’s the carnival bark, and there’s the fucking show, but he’s outside the American political tradition. I think we have a responsibility as Waystar—”

She was cut off when Roman began humming the national anthem.

“Fuck you, Roman!” she spat out.

You put a hand on his arm, and he stopped humming. “I know my opinion here means little to nothing, but… I don’t like Mencken. He’s radical, and he’s dangerous. I’m not saying we swing blue, either. I’m saying we stay safe with Boyer. Our position right now is… precarious. It’s the best option we have.”

Logan studied you, and nodded twice. He was never one for safe options, though. You knew that full and well.

Both Roman and Shiv burst into an argument then, lobbing insults back and forth at each other. Tom stared blankly at the ground, looking even more exhausted than he usually did.

“Stop being a dirty little pixie whispering swastikas into Dad’s ear!” Shiv ground out.

“Boom! There you go again! So fucking route one!” Roman exclaimed. 

The scowl on her face deepened. “I’m not saying it’s going to be the full Third Reich, but I am genuinely concerned that we could slide into a fucking Russian Berlusconied Brazilian fuckpile!”

Raising his brows, Roman shot back, “You have a trophy husband and several fur coats. I think you’re gonna be fine.”

“Tom,” Logan said, seemingly unaffected by the harsh bickering. “Who do you like?”

“Me? I, uh… I think Shiv talks a lot of sense. I also jibe with Salgado.”

Blowing out a breath, Roman said, “You jibe with him? Pretty sure that’s racist, Tom.”

“Salgado is another safe alternative,” you said. “Just not… not Mencken.”

This made Roman nudge his elbow into you. “I thought you were all about giving people chances! Mencken, he’s… you and him have a lot of beliefs in common, actually!”

“Oh? And what’s that?” 

“You’re, uh, both against free-market capitalism! That counts for something, right? Why don’t you just give him a chance?” 

You pinched the space between your brows. “Rome—”

Before you had a chance to finish, Roman was addressing Logan. “Dad, I know you came to the market to get a nice milk cow, but we found ourselves a fucking T-rex, okay? He’s box-office. The guy is fucking diesel. I mean, he’s good on camera. He’s fun! He’ll fight. Viewers will eat out of his hand. No downside.”

“Uh, right, no downside. Let’s just invade Poland, Dad!” Shiv scoffed. “His chief of staff broke a kid’s jaw at a rally!”

“If we don’t come to an accommodation, we get outflanked and we lose the ATN dollar machine when we need cash to fight Tech. Right? Shiv wants her way, I want my way, Connor wants his way, so that’s even.”

Vehemently, Shiv protested, “It’s not fucking even! My opinion counts for more!”

Everyone looked to her, miffed. She sounded more like a child than anything. 

“No, it does! It just fucking does! I know this! People hate Mencken. They fucking hate that guy!” Shiv lowered her voice, as if just realizing that she was yelling a notch too loud. “You have to look at the climate.”

 From the windows, Greg raised a hand. “Do I—do I get a vote?”

“Oh, sure, buddy. You get to vote at the election with all the other folks,” Roman told his cousin, humorously.

“Yeah, well, I just thought I’d get a… bigger vote in here?”

Ignoring him, Hugo said, “Boyer is likely to be flexible over the DOJ.”

“Not if he doesn’t win,” Shiv said. “Which… he won’t.”

“Isn’t that what you want?” you sighed. “You’re blue, Shiv.”

“My personal politics and the company’s values are on opposite ends of the spectrum,” she clarified. “I have to put the company before myself.”

“Okay, we’re hearing rumors that the case is weakening,” Hugo said. “No one big is likely to do jail time. With the notable exception of Tom, of course. Sorry, Tom.”

Visibly, Tom’s shoulders seemed to stiffen, but he nodded nonetheless. “No, please, Hugo… understood.”

Shiv turned to address her father again. “If you don’t go blue, Dad, then at least we have to be backing Salgado.”

This made Connor audibly groan. “Ugh. Señor Dickless. Captain of the Tampa Bay Cuckaneers.”

“Look, I don’t like him. He’s a neocon pretending to be a paleocon, but he at least talks base!” Shiv said. 

Roman clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “Wow. I think you’re so brave for picking the brown man. I think that we should get you a medal! A special medal for white women who like brown men.”

“Wow, okay. You’re just being racist! You’re being racist now!” Shiv said, swinging her incredulous gaze from you to her father.

In a mocking tone, Roman said, “Oh, yeah, I’m a good girl! I pretend to care about people because nobody ever cares about me!”

“Hm. Roman, do you have anything you wanna tell Dad? A message from Mom, maybe?”

He recoiled, frowning. “Uh, yeah, wow. Fuck you! Thanks, I do.” Roman looked to his dad, and he could feel the familiar fear creeping up and seizing his ribcage. It helped that you’d shifted your hand to lay over his, but only barely. “Mom’s getting remarried.”

Logan nodded, contemplative. “Hm. To Bertie Woofter?”

“Ooh, no. To Peter. Peter, uh, Peter Munson.”

“Munion,” you whispered.

“Peter Munion,” Roman corrected. 

Anger clouded over Logan’s eyes. “You’re fucking kidding. The seat sniffer? Christ. He’s been hanging around for forty-some years!”

“Yeah, and, well, she’d love it if you came to their big Tuscan wedding.”

“Ooh, La-di-da,” Logan said, sucking in a deep breath. “And they sent you as their messenger boy?”

He laughed and laughed. Roman shrugged.

“Okay,” the old man finally said. “Back to it, then. Who are we picking?”

“I guess there are other names,” Hugo offered. Connor coughed pointedly into his fist, but nobody paid him any mind.

Firm, Logan said, “We have to be united on this. It’s a disaster if we splinter.”

“Salgado has great narrative,” Shiv said.

Scowling, Roman spat out, “Quit butt-huffing Salgado! We all supported your little DC lemonade stand, but this is the real fucking world. This actually matters.”

Lip curled, Shiv replied, voice dripping with venom, “Roman, you just love the boot because you like to be kicked by it.”

Clearly hurt, Roman sucked in a deep breath and picked a piece of lint off his pants.

Connor coughed again, and Logan finally asked him what was on his mind.

“Nothing,” the eldest son said. “No, it’s nothing.”

As if to entertain a ludicrous notion, Logan smiled. “What about Connor?”

“I do believe that idea has good promise,” Connor exclaimed. “I do!”

“I could see it,” Logan said. It was strange seeing him smile in such a way. You couldn’t quite decipher its genuinity. “Kids?”

With a slight snicker, Roman raised his brows. “Uhm… sure, I don’t know.” After a pause, he straightened and asked in a more serious tone, “Wait, but, like—really?”

“It feels very…” You winced, sending Connor an apologetic look. “Very nepo baby? Very rigged.”

Roman shrugged. “They’re all fucking weirdos, anyway. Why not?”

“I mean, he’s a good-looking kid,” Logan said. “He’s smart… in his own way. Fucking Joe Kennedy did it for his boys, no? So let’s get him in there with a smile and a shoeshine and get Ron and everyone behind him.”

No way the matter was settled. Shiv crossed her arms, eyes darting every which way in an incredulous manner. 

“I would fight so fuckin’ hard for this family, Pop,” Connor told his dad, warmth spilling over his features. 

Logan casted his gaze over to his daughter. “Siobhan. As a political consultant… what do you think?”

“Well, no huge name ID, but the family name will be a factor and… uh, he’s got no track record.”

“Nothing to beat me with,” Connor emphasized with a charming grin. “I’m a clean skin!”

They yammered on some more, and Roman rubbed his knuckles along his hairline, seeming stressed. He pulled out his phone and shot out a few texts really quickly, thumbs flying across the keyboard.

Finally, once he put the device away, Roman shook his head. “Okay, but, are we being serious about this? We’re talking about trying to make Connor president?”

All the warmth drained from Connor’s face, replaced by a marring frown. “It’s a big tent, Roman. Why don’t you just come in?”

“Sure. Right. I might just call the guy who waxes my balls, he would be a great president, don’t you think?” Roman retorted.

Shiv interjected once more. “If we’re talking about this seriously, I really think we need to take a look at Salgado. Can I bring him up here without being fucking shot?”

Connor rolled his eyes and Roman groaned.

Finally, Logan’s eyes landed on you.

“You’re for Boyer, Y/N?”

You sat up straighter. “I think he’s safe. Most conservatives like safe. Or, at least, the illusion of safety. Boyer can give them that.”

There was a second of a pause, before Logan nodded. “Hugo. Call Boyer.”

“Well, if Shiv gets to bring up soggy Salgado then I wanna see if we can tame Mencken, okay?” Roman asked just as Hugo handed Logan the phone. In a quieter voice, Roman leaned forward to whisper to just you, “I arranged a meeting with him tonight. Come with?”

You reared back, eyes narrowing. “What? No, Roman.”

“Please? Just… you don’t even have to say anything. Just hear him out. What if he’s not all that bad?”

You blew out a steely breath. Meeting with a fascist was certainly not something you ever thought you’d agree to do. 

Begrudging, you muttered, “Fine. But please, Roman, don’t be serious about him. I’m begging you.”

Roman gave you a half-shrug, which didn’t quell any worries you had one bit. “We’ll just see how the dice rolls.”

When Boyer finally picked up the phone, the two of you lapsed into silence, listening in on the conversation. His voice was groggy, as if he’d just been woken up. He didn’t sound too happy at Logan’s request to come to the room.

“Oh… and my fridge is empty, Dave. I don’t suppose you could bring me a Coke?” Logan said. You raised a brow in surprise whilst Roman smiled down at his lap. It was a power play—a reminder to Boyer that he ate out of Logan’s palms.

“Did you mean to call room service?” the vice’s voice crackled through.

“If you don’t have a Coke, is there something else? Could you, perhaps, fire the deputy attorney general?”

“Fire the deputy attorney general?” Boyer parroted, twinged with disbelief. 

Logan smiled, laughing. “I’m kidding. Come on over. Have a chat. If it’s convenient, of course.”

Five minutes later, Boyer was at the suite’s door. You had no time to listen to his talk with Logan, because Roman was already up and pulling you out the door. He spared no explanation to Shiv, who watched the two of you leave with suspicious eyes. 

You took the elevator a floor down, where Mencken’s room was. 

Roman was the one that knocked, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet anxiously. 

“Come in!” you faintly heard Mencken’s voice say. Both you and Roman exchanged looks, yours warning and his pleading, in a sense.

He wanted so badly for your approval.

The two of you stepped in, met with an empty hotel room. It took you another moment to realize that the bathroom door was ajar, Mencken standing in front of the mirror with just a towel hanging over his hips, shaving foam shadowing over his chin and jaw. He was dragging a razor through the white foam, a smile to his lips upon seeing the both of you.

“Hey, guys. Glad to see you again.”

Roman smiled back, leaning against the bathroom’s door frame while you lingered behind him.

“So… I—we just wanted to chit-chat a little bit. That was funny earlier, by the way. You tripping the light fantastic on Grandpappy’s nutsack.”

Mencken hummed. “When I called your dad bullshit? Did that bump?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve never seen that before. That was fucking hardcore,” Roman commented. “Y/N isn’t a fan of ATN either, as it turns out.”

For a moment, you sent Roman a half-hearted glare. He’d said that you wouldn’t have to say anything.

“Ooh. Waystar’s princess, not liking Waystar? How meaty.” Mencken tilted his head back to shave the nooks and crannies that were harder to maneuver around. “Good for you, though. The thing is… this monkey don’t dance.”

Roman laughed, pointing at him. “This monkey right here? The monkey shaving in a hotel bathroom?”

“That’s right.” Finally, Mencken rinsed off the last bits of foam from his face, wiping off the excess dampness with a towel. There wasn’t a single nick on his face—you thought of the many times you’ve watched Roman shaved, when he always somehow managed to garner a dozen or so tiny cuts along his jaw. Mencken turned to face the two of you. 

“Listen, I did want to talk to you about something. Fuck it, I’ll just come right out and say it.” Roman eased into the bathroom, leaning against the wall opposite Mencken, tugging you in as well. It was a strange feeling—you’d never had a meeting in a bathroom before. Wrinkling his nose, Roman said, “Fascists are kind of cool… but not really. So, is that, like, gonna be a problem? Will it be a thing?”

It unnerved you when Mencken sighed, stepping closer to the both of you. So close, in fact, that you could smell the shaving cream he’d used. Your brows furrowed in distaste and fixed your stare on the tile down below your feet.

“Seriously? Me? I just… I don’t have a lot of boundaries.” 

Evidently, you wanted to snap. But you kept quiet.

“St. Augustine, Thomas Aquinas, Schumacher. I’ll borrow from anyone. To restrict me to that label is just… it’s not right, is it? You know, if Franco or H or Travis Bickle had a good pitch, fuck it!”

This made you tear your gaze away from the ground, meeting Mencken’s stare head-on. He was much closer that you realized, and that made you all the more uncomfortable. 

“H?” you finally croaked. “As in—?”

He spared you a wolfish smile. “I’m a fully-fledged, small-dicked Democrat.”

“I don’t think you are,” you challenged. 

This made him tilt his head and bark out a laugh. “Which one? Small-dicked or a Democrat? Because I can tell you now that neither of those are true, sweetheart.” Your unamused countenance seemed to only fuel him further. “A well-regulated election is a transmission frequency for God’s grace, really.”

“Holy shit,” Roman whistled. “You really are a Christian, aren’t you?”

“Well, no, no, my only thing is like—who’s the stakeholder, right? I’ve been tending my little garden for a hundred years, and then forty new guys show up in the back of a truck, playing their boombox. When it’s put to a vote, they decide to, uh, give my farm to themselves. I mean, it’s ridiculous, right? Maybe we should be putting in before we get to take out.”

There was so much to pick apart with his ideology. So many flaws, so many weak-links. But you didn’t say anything.

Instead, Roman asked, “Okay, well, who gets to join?” 

“People trust people who look like them. That’s just a scientific fact. They will give more tax dollars to help them,” Mencken said. “And I know you look nothing like me, ma’am, so I’ll just say it plain and clear. I don’t trust you, and you don’t trust me. But that’s just part of the thrill, no?”

You recoiled back into Roman. “What the fuck are you talking about? What thrill? Can you just—back up a bit? You’re all up in my fucking personal space.” 

Your scowl loosened just a tad when Mencken raised his hands and took a step back. He snorted. “Sorry. Don’t cancel me. Or do. I don’t think it matters much, right?”

He was right, but you didn’t say it.

“I like this country,” Mencken admitted. “I do. I like the people in it.”

“Not all the people, though, right?” you carefully asked.

“Of course, not. And don’t get all high and mighty on me. You can’t say you like all the people in it, now can you?” You opened your mouth to say something, but he cut you off. “We aren’t too different, you and I. Roman… I see why he’s taken a liking to you. You have some sense about you.”

You gave Roman a questioning glance, wondering what on earth he’d said to Mencken through text.

You clenched your jaw. “I’m not here for you,” you finally breathed out. “You can’t sway me, Mencken.”

“Oh, we’ll see about that, sweetheart.”

Clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth, Roman finally intervened before you could get too heated, “In terms of, you know, this thing we have… there’s a thing here, right?” 

“Mhm.”

“I get it. You’re fucking 6G and we’re Betamax, but you need us, I think. Our news, our viewers, those fucking almost-deads. That’s a big slice of pie,” Roman explained. 

“Well, if I’m the nominee… are any of them really going to vote against me?” he asked.

Half a shrug lifting one of his shoulders, Rome said, “No, but… it’s going to be a fucking shitshow going into the convention. I think you could really use our push.”

You weren’t happy about any of this. But Logan had already called Boyer. The deal was done, right? You’d walk back up to the suite, and the next red-wing electee would be picked. This was all… for nothing.

Right?

Mencken nodded. “And I think you could use my push.”

“Maybe,” Roman admitted.

“Where are you in all this?” Mencken asked Roman, curiously. “What’s the little forgotten Prince doing?”

Roman made a nervous, whooshing sound. “I’m, uh, you know. I’m creeping on the come-up.”

“Oh, yeah?” Mencken glanced at you, as if to decipher whether or not he was telling the truth. You betrayed nothing, looking back down at the tiles.

“I’ve got some ideas for ATN. Sluice out the fucking porridge and add some sriracha. Poach some of those TikTok psychos, you know? E-girls with fucking guns and Juul pods. Give me some straight-shot blacks and latinos. That’ll get a few generations turning heads. No more of this fucking… pillows and bedpans. We’re strictly bone broth and dick pills. Deep state conspiracy hour but with, like, a fucking wink, you know? It’ll be funny.” Roman clapped his hands together. “The whole show is kinda set up for the star. President Jeryd Mencken.”

Your face soured.

“I like that,” Mencken said, stroking his freshly-shaved jaw. “I like that a lot.”

“Well, I don’t. Good fucking luck, Roman.” With that, you straightened your shoulders and marched out of the bathroom, needing to get away from the two of them. You needed air. More importantly, you needed to get up to the suite and ask if they’d settled for Boyer.

The two men stood in the bathroom, silent for a few moments.

“I think she likes me.” Mencken smirked.

Roman scratched at the back of his head. He was really hoping you’d see the better side of Mencken, like he did. He just hoped that you weren’t too angry with him. You hardly ever got mad, but when you did, it always felt like the end of the world to him.

“Right… can you, uh… come up and say hello or something to him? My dad?” Roman glanced at the door. “Oh, and bring a can of Coke with you.”

Logan chose Mencken.

That night, you crawled into the cold hotel bed and cried. You felt so… so trapped in a life that you didn’t want to live. You briefly wondered what would happen to you if you quit your job entirely, but you pushed the thought away almost as quickly as it came. It wasn’t something you liked to entertain.

Half an hour later, you could hear your door opening. 

Right. You’d forgotten that Roman had asked for another set of the key card to your room. You quietly wiped your tears away, grateful that it was too dark for him to see.

He slipped in behind you, sliding his arms over your waist and pressing his nose into the back of your neck. 

“Are you mad at me?” he asked.

You chose not to reply, pretending to be asleep.

“It’ll be good,” he said, eventually. “He’ll be good. I promise. His dick is big enough for the both of us.”

You shifted your foot just a bit, but that was enough for Roman to know that you were awake.

“Stop ignoring me.”

“I don’t want you here,” you murmured.

There was a shuffle behind you. Roman cleared his throat. It was so unbearably tense.

“If it’s Mencken you’re worried about—”

“I don’t want you here,” you repeated, a warbling edge to your voice. “I love you, Roman. Please leave.”

He went stiff. One second, then two, then three. 

“I love you, too,” he finally said. It was said with no joking tone, no playful quips, no inappropriate remarks. It wasn’t often that Roman told you that he loved you, at least compared to the number of times you’d say it to him. Maybe it was because he never knew if you meant I love you, or I’m in love with you.

And with that, he slowly slipped his hands off of you, and got back onto his feet. He made a show of leaving the key card on the nightstand, before making his way out of your hotel room.

He shut the door behind him, standing in front for a minute. A part of him wanted you to open up and beg him to come back. An even more delusional part of him expected you to do so.

Instead, Roman could hear your muffled sobs ricochet from behind the door. Something within him seized up. He turned on his heel and left.

Kendall had invited you to his birthday party, to your surprise. After all that transpired between the two of you, you hardly expected to be wanted at his party. Though, from what you heard, it was hardly a personal affair.

It didn’t seem like your kind of event, honestly, and you hardly had a reason to go. You loved Kendall, but you could tell him that any other day of the year, when he wasn’t surrounded by fucking vagina-entrances, childhood treehouse replicas, and miniature Wu-Tang dancers. Though, Kendall told you to keep that last bit on the down low. The dancers were meant to be a surprise.

But you weren’t at all planning on going. 

That was, until Logan decided otherwise for you.

There was a problem with GoJo, and Logan was pissed that Matsson hadn’t shown up. Something about blatant disrespect, he’d said. 

“He’s going to this fucking party, isn’t he?” Logan had barked. “Huh? Where is he? Getting his nails done? Asshole whitened?”

Roman squinted at his dad. “I think we just have to court him a little, is the thing—”

“Bah. No. It’s bad fucking juju to start like this,” Logan snippily said.

You quirked a brow, knowing Logan was never one to be superstitious. 

Shiv and Roman both tried to broach more options, but Logan shut them all down. “The deal makes sense. It’s a great deal. But he won’t make the deal because he’s being an arrogant prick.”

“Fine. Yeah, sure, Matsson’s an asshole. But should we really burn our only parachute because of that?” Shiv stressed.

Logan leaned back in his seat, regarding his daughter. “It’s just smart business, Shiv. I don’t want to pay over the odds. And eventually, the market will make him make the deal.”

You shook your head. “The market has plenty of better hands to deal him.”

“Someone can make a better offer, and we’d be screwed,” Roman agreed. 

“Dad, we have a scale issue. Our streaming platform is for shit, and we have nothing that looks like growth,” Shiv added on. “This gets us consequently into streaming, into sports betting—social media! We have a little window. Miss this, and we end up being pilot fish nibbling leftovers from Bezos’ fucking teeth. Dad, please. If you don’t want to talk to Matsson, fine. But let me.”

“Let us,” Roman interjected. “We can all do it. He’s gonna be at the party, right? We’ll go.”

“You’re going?” Logan asked, raising an eyebrow at Shiv.

Her eyes darted from her father to her brother. “Mhm.”

Heaving out a breath, Logan nodded. “Y/N, you go with them. Don’t go in too strong. This is a black box, and I don’t want to overpay.”

You wondered if Logan wanted you there to help broker the deal, or if he wanted you there to make sure Roman and Shiv didn’t start clawing at each other’s throats.

Shiv nodded, muttering something under her breath, and darted out of Logan’s office to make some preparations. That just left you and Roman standing in front of Logan. The air between the two of you was still tense since the whole Mencken debacle.

You were about to step out as well, before Logan said, “Since you two are going, might as well give him this in person.”

He slid over an envelope. The three of you, along with Gerri, had discussed its contents: an offer for Kendall to cash out of the company for good. Roman glanced at you, and you used your head to gesture for him to take it. 

“You think he’ll like it?” Roman asked his dad, who offered him half a smile and a shrug.

When he turned to look at you, the glass door was ajar and the spot where you were standing a moment ago was vacant.

Roman’s palms were sweaty. This was about the fifth time he’d wiped them down the front of his suit’s pants, hoping they’d just air out on their own by the time he got to your door.

They didn’t, but Roman found himself shrugging it off. You’d seen much worse than sweaty palms when it came to him.

It was an hour before the party was supposed to start—more so if he wanted to be fashionably late, didn’t want to seem too desperate—and he rang the bell.

It’d only been a few days since the two of you properly spoke, but Roman missed you. He found his nights staring at your number, thumb hovering over the call button. He’d sent about a dozen texts since then, but none of them were replied to. Sure, the two of you had gotten into fights every now and then but they never lasted long. 

And Roman was determined to get you to stop ignoring him.

When the door swung open, you peeked through, not at all ready yet for the party. Roman snickered upon seeing your eyeshadow only done on one eye, curlers in your hair.

“Looking hot, fuck-face,” he whistled. To his relief, your features softened, and you stepped to the side to let him amble in. Even in your current disheveled state, you knew he was telling the truth.

In truth, you’d missed him more than you could ever admit. It took a great deal of self-restraint not to reply to his strings of texts, especially once you were given time to cool off after what had transpired in the hotel bathroom. He was your Achilles’ heel, in a way.

“What do you want?” you asked, not even bothering to face him as you shut the door and made your way further into your home, standing in front of your mirror vanity to resume doing your makeup. 

Roman watched your reflection in a near somber manner. “Well, I was just thinking, since we’re going to Kendall’s little birthday bash, we could go togeth—”

“No,” you found yourself saying without a second thought. “I can go myself.”

With a sigh, Roman stepped forward, leaning against your vanity so he could look at you instead of your reflection. “I just want to talk. This—whatever’s going on between us—it fucking sucks. I miss you.”

For a second, you let your eyes meet his. You didn’t say anything, simply carrying on with drawing your eyeliner. 

“You’re not gonna say you miss me, too?”

“Of course I missed you, Rome.” There was a sort of bitterness to your words. “That doesn’t make me any less mad at you.”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry I went down the Mencken road. I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you. But, cross my heart and hope to die, I genuinely believe he can help us. And, like, what’s the worst he can do? Just because he becomes president doesn’t mean he can do fuck all. I’m just with him because we’d all benefit from him helping out the company.” He scratched the back of his head whilst giving you, as he would so eloquently put it, fucky eyes. 

There was a long stretch of pregnant silence. You’d finally put down the eyeliner, shifting to stand directly in front of him, your chest brushing against his. 

“What can I do?” he whispered. He couldn’t help it—his eyes were fixed on your lips, parted and glossed. “What can I do to make it up to you?”

You smelled so damn good too—Roman felt like he was going delirious. He chalked it up to not being around you for a long while. That was probably why. His hands reached out to rest over your hips. 

“Not much you can do now. What’s done is done. Your dad settled on Mencken—there’s no changing his mind.” You tilted your head, so close now that your nose was brushing against his. He briefly wondered if you could feel the way his heart was slamming imprints against his ribs. 

You were just a hair’s breadth away from kissing him. You were so fucking close—

Until you pulled away with a smug little grin, far enough so that his hands fell away from you, going right back to fixing up your makeup. “I can look past Mencken for now. Mostly because I can’t see someone like him actually winning the election. But I’m absolutely not saying that I’m with you on this. I’m just saying we can put aside our… differences. If he just so happens to win, I’m counting on you to have your hand up his ass, and my hand would be up yours. So we’re good, for now.” 

“You fucking tease,” he grumbled, chuckling slightly. “What was that about your hand up my ass?”

“Awh,” you said in a mocking tone, one of your feet kicking up to knock against his shin. “Did you manage to get a hard on without me even touching you?”

Roman rolled his eyes. “Fuck off. And no.”

He was lying. He definitely had an erection, and the both of you knew it.

“Did you want me to kiss you?” you asked abruptly, starting to pull out the curlers in your hair.

His mouth went slack. His mind was moving too fast for him to formulate any coherent sentences. Instead, he laughed a bit, before it tapered away awkwardly.

“Yeah?” he finally replied, more of a question than anything.

“You don’t sound sure.”

“I’m sure,” he haughtily replied.

“Okay,” you said, though you didn’t look convinced. Another roller came out. 

“Don’t believe me?” Roman placed his hands over your hips once more, and yanked you close. “I’ll kiss you right here, right now.”

A brilliant smile danced across your features. “That a promise, Romey?”

With that, Roman leaned forward and slotted his lips over yours. It was tentative and soft and—surprisingly sticky. Your lip gloss, he registered a second later, tasted like strawberries and honey. A content hum slipped from you and you wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him back with just as much vigor. Your nose slanted against his, foreheads knocking together. 

You were the one to pull away first, laughing lightly at his hooded eyes and the way he chased after your lips. A second bout of laughter overtook you when you saw the glossy, tinted smudges across his mouth. 

Shoulders still shaking, you pulled out a makeup wipe and handed it over to him, silently gesturing to his lips. 

“The color doesn’t suit you,” you rasped, though you kissed his cheek to leave a faint mark there, as well. “That’s a first for us, you know?”

“What?”

“Kissing.”

Roman looked at you strangely as he wiped away the remnants of your gloss. “We’ve kissed millions of times. Mostly you, because you’re obsessed with me.”

“Yeah, but… not like that. Mouth to mouth. It was always a line I didn’t wanna cross, you know?”

He toyed with a brush laying on your vanity. “Why not?” he asked, his voice sounding a bit more unsure. “You afraid I’m gonna give you cooties?”

“Well, because we’re…” You paused, gesturing between the two of you. “We’re friends. With occasional benefits, I guess. I didn’t know if you were okay with it.”

Lifting a shoulder, Roman offered you a smile. Friends didn’t sit quite right with him. Not anymore, at least. “Well now you know. You can kiss me all you want.”

You huffed in amusement, before pulling out the rest of the rollers in your hair. All you had left to do was put on your outfit, and you were good to go. You wondered if Kendall would be happy seeing his siblings at his party, when you knew for a fact that he hadn’t invited them.

“I’m gonna go change. You want me to help you out with that?” You looked down at his tented pants with a raised brow. “No blow jobs, though. Don’t wanna ruin my makeup.”

This time, Roman was the one that laughed, loud and chesty. He sucked on his teeth, as if debating his options. 

“How much time do we have?” he asked.

You glanced over at a small clock hanging on the opposite side of the room. “We’ve got forty-five minutes, maybe? If we wanna get there before Matsson gets bored and leaves.”

Roman clapped his hands together. “Great! More than enough time.” 

The two of you ended up fooling around for a bit longer than you’d anticipated—he’d humped your ass with you bent over your couch, then finished by jacking off onto your back. You were grateful that you hadn’t yet changed into your outfit for the party, having stayed in a comfortable white shirt that you shucked off and threw into the laundry bin.

To your surprise, he seemed earnest enough to want to try fingering you, and you shyly told him to go for it if he wanted. A permanent flush fixed over your cheeks as you gently guided him to do what felt best. His thumb over your clit, his fingers sheathed deep in your cunt. He was good at it, mostly because he was clinging onto your every plea like it was gospel. You came with a drawn-out moan and your teeth sinking into his shoulder. 

You managed to squeeze in just one more handjob for him since he somehow got hard again while fingering you, whispering filthy nothings into his ear as he whined, eyes rolled into the back of his head. To your curious delight, you’d found that Roman really liked being called a good boy.

Only after all that did you manage to change into a semi-formal dress, touching up on your makeup since a lot of your lipstick had smudged onto Roman. In turn, Roman headed to the bathroom to wash up a bit, comb back his hair, some strands had come loose during your little excursions, and straightened out his suit.

“You ready?” you asked, peeking into the bathroom. The two of you were a bit later than you would’ve liked. “I want to make a stop at the corner store before the party.”

“What for?” he asked, curious.

“Last minute birthday gift,” you replied, hopping slightly as you strapped on your shoes. “Let’s go, Rome. You look hot, I promise.”

He smiled at your reflection, and took your outstretched hand. 

Upon arriving at the large venue, the woman in front asked to take everybody’s coats and phones. To which, Roman told her, “Yeah, fuck off, I’m not doing that,” and walked right past her. 

You gave her an apologetic smile, shedding your coat and handed it to her. “Sorry, I can’t hand you my phone. Company policy.”

With that, you jogged to catch up to Roman, chatting with Connor, who had also chosen to cling on tightly to his coat. Beneath it, you saw that one of his arms was in a sling.

“Oh, Con, what happened?” you asked, waving hello to Willa.

“Nothing, nothing. Just ranch stuff,” the older man replied, nonchalant.

Roman snorted. “What, a horse didn’t want you to fuck it?”

“He had a fall,” Willa said, and Connor immediately protested.

“You make it sound like I’m ninety years old. No, Maxim and I just got some polling results. We shared a Cognac, and then I slipped doing a little Irish jig.”

“Oh, okay. Ranch stuff. Got it,” quipped Roman. 

You stopped in front of a tunnel-like entrance, the walls lined with soft pink. 

 “This feels disgustingly Kendall,” Shiv said, and the two of you laughed as you strolled in. “So… where’s Tabs, Rome? She busy?”

Arching a brow, you looked to Roman. You knew that his relationship with her had fizzled out, especially after the… corpse sex debacle.

“Yup,” Roman said, clearly not comfortable discussing it with her.

She grinned, snickering. “Again? Did you kill her?”

“We’re actually—we’re not really seeing each other anymore. She was just a bit boring. That’s all I’m saying,” Roman said. His eyes darted to you, and you offered him half a smile.

“Mmh, yeah. Because you find sexual intimacy boring, don’t you?” Shiv pressed, which made both you and Roman frown.

“As if you’re the catch,” Roman snapped back. “You’re more fucked up than me, you know! Seems like Y/N and I are nicer to each other than you are to your own husband.”

Shiv looked between the two of you, expression immediately souring. “You’re so fucking annoying,” she muttered, before turning to mutter something to Tom.

By the end of the pink tunnel, a woman dressed in a cartoonish nurse uniform greeted the group. “You’ve just been born into the world of Kendall Roy!” she announced.

“Oh, Jesus,” Shiv huffed.

Roman turned back to look at the pink tunnel. “Oh. So if we’ve just been born, then that must be mom’s…?” He shifted his weight back and forth by the exit. “You’re telling me I’m repeatedly entering my mom’s vagina right now?”

You snorted in amusement, nudging Shiv. “These your mom jokes just keep getting better.”

She hummed. “Cold and inhospitable. It seems to check out.”

“This is my mom’s cooch, just so you know,” Roman told the nurse. “And you’re implying that it’s massive, so, uh, might wanna get Kendall to see if you can tighten my mother’s vagina.”

The group shuffled off, leaving the poor nurse to gather her wits and greet the next few guests approaching. 

“Where’s Matsson, you think?” Shiv asked.

“Probably standing in a corner somewhere, monitoring his biometrics from his watch,” Roman scoffed. 

“Don’t you think we should find Kendall before trying to find Matsson?” you queried, looking around the crowded room in hopes of finding Kendall somewhere amidst the dancing throng. “I mean… it is his birthday party, after all.”

Nodding, Roman said, “Yeah, good thinking. Let’s just get it out of the way.”

Shiv managed to track down one of Kendall’s assistants, asking her where he’d be. She pointed up the stairs, where the VIP section was. Thanking her, the three of you made your way up the stairs whilst the rest of the group stayed down to mingle. 

The second floor was a bit less packed, but there were still dozens upon dozens of famous figures mingling about. It wasn’t hard to find Kendall amongst them, sticking out like a sore thumb with a birthday crown perched on his head, laughing with his girlfriend, Naomi Pierce, by his side. 

His eyes met his siblings’, and he scrambled to take the crown off, dropping it onto the nearest waiter’s tray. 

“Woah, woah, woah. Wait a second. Who let you guys in? This is friends only!” he exclaimed. 

Shiv made a pitying noise. “Awh. Shouldn’t it be empty, then?”

Roman cackled. “She beat me by one second.”

“Happy birthday, old man,” Shiv said, giving her older brother a sharp smile.

“Just to say, I’m only here because I heard there was going to be a five-dimensional catastrophe, and I want to watch you crash and burn,” Roman told him.

Features mellowing, Kendall stepped forward and spread his arms out wide to give Roman a hug, which he reciprocated with no complaint.

 However, he did have to squeeze in, “Man, it even feels like you’re old. You sure you’re only forty? You look like shit.”

Despite his harsh words, Kendall pulled away with a genuine smile. He was happy that his siblings were here, even if he hadn’t invited them.

He hugged you next, and you reached up to kiss his cheek with a smile. “Hey, Kenny D. Happy birthday—I brought you a little present.” You reached into the cheap plastic bag from the corner store, brandishing a strawberry popsicle, still in its wrapper. “It’s probably a bit melted but if you popped it into the freezer for ten minutes or so, it should be good as new. Sorry it’s not much.”

Kendall’s expression seemed to soften, recalling how the two of you would always argue over the last remaining strawberry popsicle during the summers you were still little children. When you would grab it from the freezer before he could, he’d tug on your pigtails and call you mean as you denied ever taking them, and you’d hide the wrappers in Rome’s room so he’d never know it was you. But he could always tell from the sticky red on the corners of your mouth and your sugar-highs that seemed to last for a little too long. 

“No, this is…” He took the popsicle from you, staring down at the wrapper. “This is perfect. Thank you. I really appreciate it, I do.”

You nodded, pointedly watching as he pocketed the popsicle. “No problem. I promise not to take this one from you.”

Kendall laughed, then looked to his brother and sister. “Really? No card? I’m disappointed.”

“Sorry, I couldn’t find one that said both ‘happy birthday’ and ‘get well soon’,” Shiv crooned. The smile on Kendall’s face faltered.

“Well, I’m glad you guys came. It says a lot,” he finally said.

“It was a ten minute drive,” Shiv deadpanned. 

A part of you wondered why Shiv was being particularly brutal today, especially on Kendall’s birthday. Nonetheless, the two of them awkwardly hugged, Shiv patting her brother’s back a few times.

Connor and Willa ascended the stairs a few seconds later, waving hello. They greeted the birthday boy with hugs, and the smile returned back to Kendall’s face, though it wasn’t quite the same as before.

“So, what do you guys think? Sick party, right?” Kendall asked, arms spread.

Squinting, Roman glanced back downstairs. “It’s cool, but, uh, did you ask for Mummy’s permission to use her, uh… squatch?”

Kendall shook his head a bit, seeming puzzled. “What, from, like, a copyright perspective?”

“Well, it’s just, you know—call me old-fashioned, but I think you should ask before constructing a giant replica of someone’s vagina,” Roman off-handedly said.

“I’d definitely want to be informed before someone decides to make an artistic rendition of my privates,” you chimed in agreement.

“Duly noted,” Roman said in a faux British accent, and the two of you giggled under your breath like schoolgirls.

Kendall, miffed, nodded a few times. “Yeah, okay. Yeah. I can—I can send mom an email. But, relax, will you? Yes, Roman, you can take it home with you.”

Roman pumped a fist into the air at that, and you both burst into another round of giddy laughter.

Rolling her eyes, Shiv said, “Okay, so, tell us. Who else is here?”

Kendall made a show of looking around at the dozens of famous celebrities loitering around the VIP section. “Who isn’t?”

“Your dad,” Roman said.

“Your mom,” Shiv told him.

“Your wife,” Connor added.

“Your kids?” you put forth, more as a question than anything. 

“Any real friends,” Roman chimed again.

With a smile, Shiv said, “I mean, business folks, sure. Stewy? Honestly, we could do with building some bridges. So, uh, Lawrence Yee? He here? Lukas Matsson?”

There it was. She name-dropped the golden goose.

“Yeah, yeah. They’re all here, somewhere,” Kendall assured, gesturing around vaguely. “I have something to show you guys, actually. Come on.”

The siblings and you followed him down a winding hallway, which gave way to black-out curtains, and past that, it seemed to be an art gallery of sorts.

“Hey, Dad wanted me to give this to you,” Roman said, handing Kendall the envelope. You eyed it warily, wondering how Kendall would react to the offer.

“What is it?” the older brother queried, shaking it lightly, as if expecting something inside to rattle.

A dismissive sort of smile fell over Roman’s face. “It’s, uh, an iTunes gift card and a couple of your baby teeth. It’s nice. We hope you like it.”

Kendall looked at you, silently asking for confirmation. You nodded, hesitant, but that seemed to satisfy him enough—he pocketed the envelope to open up for later. 

“Okay, guys, let me show you some shit. C’mon.” He beckoned everyone into the art gallery, before spewing into a long tangent about all the people he had to collaborate with in order for things to work out.

Instead of paintings and sculptures, which you’d typically see hung up in galleries, there were newspaper articles and headlines plastered over the walls. 

The Cincinnati Standard: Waystar Chairman, Kendall Roy Elected President of World Federation!

Boston Daily Express: Wife of Tom Wambsgans Arrested In Sweep of City Street-Walkers!

The Correspondent: Connor Roy Elected President [of shitting his bag]!

The NY Globe: Failed Youngest Roy Sibling Dies in Tragic Jerk-Off Accident!

Both you and Roman stopped to stand in front of his article. You shot him an amused glance. “Who were you jerking off to, do you think?”

“Don’t worry, fuck-face, there’s a lot of Roman to go around,” he said, leaning closer to read the smaller text.

Your grin grew wider, gesturing to the paper. “Not for long, according to this.”

“It’s not a bad way to go.” Roman bumped his shoulder into yours. “Yours is going to happen any day now, I can just feel it.” 

Your brows raised, and you turned around, surprised to see your own article plastered large and tall right beside Connor’s.

New York Journalist: Disgraced CEO’s Goddaughter Kicked Out of Company—Adopted Into Communist Parties!

“Wow,” you breathed out. It wasn’t all that bad, really. 

“You like it?” Kendall asked the two of you.

“You’ve got people in here picturing me jerking off, so who’s the real winner?” Roman sneered. 

Shaking your head, you told Kendall, “I can’t even imagine why you’d have an entire room dedicated to this at your birthday party.”

“It’s—it’s unique. An extrapolation into the near future,” he said. “People dig it.”

“You keep telling yourself that,” Roman replied, clapping his shoulder, before wandering off to read the other articles.

Connor threw a large fit about his article, unhappy with the way he was being portrayed as an unserious candidate.

“You did actually shit your bag, though,” Roman said. Kendall guffawed and the two brothers began laughing together, at Connor’s expense.

His scowl deepened. “Yeah, you know why? Because I took you two fucking assholes on a camping trip because Dad couldn’t be bothered! That’s why! I ate some bad fucking fish! This is bullshit, Kendall!” He yelled that last sentence, to which Kendall quickly reassured him that he’d have it taken down.

You remembered Roman telling you about the camping trip, the both of you only barely teenagers. It was harder then, being friends with them—boys were particularly mean at that age.

You remembered asking if you could come along. Kendall told you that it was a boys trip. Only boys were allowed, and you most certainly weren’t a boy. 

You remembered Roman asking if you could somehow fit into the cooler so he could sneak you on the trip. Even now, you weren't quite sure if he was just joking or if he was being serious. Nonetheless, you pushed him away and told him to have fun sleeping on rocks and eating stale jerky that tasted like dirt. When you sniffled, Connor put a hand on your shoulder and told you that there’d be many more camping trips in the future. To your knowledge, they never went again. 

“Alright, guys, I gotta circulate. Lots of people to talk to. We can check in later, yeah?” Kendall rubbed his hands together. You briefly realized that this was the first time you’d seen him genuinely happy in a long time.

“Yeah, yeah, you go on ahead,” Shiv said, urging him on.

“It’s a great night. I’m happy you guys are here. Fucking… best birthday ever.”

With that, Kendall hurried off. You and Roman exchanged glances, mirrors of pity and guilt.

Half an hour of asking around later, Shiv managed to snag down Matsson’s location in this never-ending venue of birthday bash.

“Don’t fuck this,” Shiv warned Roman, to which he rolled his eyes and gestured for her to lead the way.

The three of you traversed up a couple more flights of winding staircases, turning left into a massive hall, where a giant replica of a treehouse was erected, leading into what looked like another secret passageway. You narrowed your eyes, seeming to recognize the little carvings on the wood by the base of the tree. Younger Kendall often went into the yard whenever he was angry, whittling away his frustrations onto the bark. You and Roman used to play pretend that they were ancient runes when he wasn’t around to hear you.

“I think a forty year old man who rebuilt his childhood treehouse should immediately go on the sex offender registry,” Roman snidely commented, eyeing the massive structure. 

Two burly guards blocked the entry way.

“We’re with Kendall,” you said as you tried to sidestep them, but one thrust his arm out in front of you.

“Do you have a rainbow band?” he gruffed.

Roman guffawed. “Yes. I’m a walking fucking rainbow band.”

It was then that Kendall’s head emerged from behind the guards, eyebrows raised.

“Hey, guys. You done downstairs?”

“Mhm. These guys aren’t letting us in. Ain’t that crazy?” Roman asked pointedly. “Do you mind if we took a gander around your mental disorder?”

Kendall laughed, though it sounded forced. “Hah. Yeah, good one. That’s funny, Rome.”

“So are you gonna let us in, or what?” Shiv butted in, clearly impatient.

“That’s, uh…” Kendall smiled, almost apologetic, almost triumphant. “That’s not possible.”

You tilted your head, wondering if Kendall somehow found out that the three of you were after Matsson. “Not possible? Why’s that?”

“You hiding something from us in there, Ken?” Roman jeered. “Nude selfies you don’t feel comfortable with showing? The angsty romantic poetry you wrote when you were seventeen?”

A frown flickered across his face. “Well, okay, the thing is—the treehouse is for cool people, and you guys… you guys aren’t cool. Sorry, Y/N. You know, I would’ve given you a band if they weren’t here with you.”

“I’m flattered,” you said in a flat tone.

“Wow. The coolest grown man’s treehouse I’ve seen in quite a while,” Shiv snippily retorted, which made Roman snicker.

Holding his hands out in a placating manner, Kendall told the three of you, “Okay, no, seriously guys. Sorry, but, like… all jokes aside, there’s actually a real issue here, and I need to be discreet, because there’s a lot of celebrities around, and if you guys were in the treehouse, it would be kinda—kinda wouldn’t feel like the treehouse, y’know?”

Shiv scoffed.

“You’re a nazi lover,” Kendall deadpanned, pointing at his sister. He jutted his finger to Roman, then you. “And you’re a nazi lover. And you’re heavily affiliated with them. Me, on the other hand, I’m a defender of liberal democracy.” 

“Lovely. You afraid of getting canceled on Twitter, Kendall?” you asked, crossing your arms. You let the words spew out without really thinking over them. “Or are you scared to show all your ad-sponsored, money-grubbing buddies up there who kicked you to the ground and spat on your corpse? It’s not a good look, is it?”

Appearing crestfallen for a moment, Kendall shook his head. “You’re being—stop. I didn’t expect you to stoop down to their level, Y/N.”

“Jesus, are you going to let us in or not?” Roman huffed.

“What, to see Matsson?” Kendall finally asked.

There it was. He knew.

“That’s why you’re here. You’re trying to push a deal,” he muttered. 

“Who fucking gives a shit?” Roman asked. “What’s the difference to you? I just want to talk to him.”

Shiv nodded. “You know what’ll happen if we do talk to him? Either we strike out with nothing, or we succeed, Waystar benefits, and your net worth goes up by several hundred million dollars.”

“You’re welcome,” retorted Roman.

“Okay, yeah, but I have to weigh that against the consideration that no losers allowed,” Kendall said, shrugging.

“God, you’re such a fucking child.” You rolled your eyes, the two other siblings following suit.

Trying to step up again, Roman said, “I’m going in. This is fucking stupid.”

Kendall grabbed at his brother’s shoulder, pulling him back, and turning him around to face away from the treehouse.

“Oh, my God. Did you see that? I just got moved.” 

Roman tried again, and the two got into a catty, near indiscernible argument. Kendall pushed, and Roman stepped back, before leaning in again. 

“You really gonna get so worked up over a treehouse?” Kendall hissed. “That’s fucking lame, man.” 

Finally, Roman stepped away, his shoulder bumping into yours. “Fuck. Wow.”

“Don’t let these guys in. This is my treehouse, and they shouldn’t be here,” Kendall warned the guards, before slipping between them, making his way back into his treehouse. “Oh, and, thanks for the offer, guys. Great headfuck from Dad. Really fucking cool of you.”

You thought the buyout would be good for him. A naive part of you had even thought that he’d simply accept it with no complaint. Lord knew it was more than enough money to sustain him several lifetimes.

“Unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable,” Roman groaned. “Now what?”

Curious, Shiv looked over at the two of you. “What was Ken talking about? What offer?”

You and Roman exchanged looks. “That was nothing,” Roman dismissively replied, shrugging. “It was just a little move to ease him out of the holding company.”

“What? And—you two didn’t think to tell me?” she just about snarled, brows drawing together.

“It’s just an offer, Shiv. You would’ve found out eventually,” you sighed, rubbing the spot between your brows, the beginnings of a headache starting to fight through. 

“Whose name was on the paper?” she asked, head tilted.

“Mine,” Roman sighed. “It’s just a name, though. It’s nothing.”

“Okay, so why wasn’t I the name if it was fucking nothing?” she demanded. “Historically, who owns the fucking company has been of some interest. It’s not nothing.”

Tired of the conversation, Roman told her, “We handled it. You wanna figure out the financing, or something? It’s all there.”

A muscle in her jaw twitched. “Yeah, that’s fucking great. You guys are so adorable. Fuck you. Fuck this.” 

She stormed off, heels clanging loudly against the staircases’ steps.

A few seconds of silence lapsed by before you reached out to take Roman’s arm. “You ready to go steal some rainbow bands?”

He used his free hand to cup your face and tug you closer, landing a loud, obnoxious kiss onto your cheek. 

“I fucking love us,” he hummed.

The two of you began to walk around, eyeing all the guests who happened to have bracelets on. 

“I do, too, Rome. I do, too.”

Eventually, the two of you managed to snag down a handsy couple who looked much too busy sucking off each others’ faces to care about their stupid rainbow bands. They handed it to you two with no question and you thanked them with a smile whilst Roman snidely told them to use protection. He was one to talk, really.

The guards also gave the two of you a lot of trouble, but after a bit of charm from your end and a bit of light threatening from Roman’s end, the two of you were finally in the damned treehouse.

“I’m scared we’re going to see detailed exhibits of Kendall’s sex life up there,” you uneasily said. 

“Nah, I think I just saw Anne Hathaway passing by. No way Kendall would embarrass himself like that around this crowd,” Roman snorted. After a second, he tacked on, “But I wouldn’t put it past him.”

Almost at once, your eyes landed on Matsson, huddled up in a dingy corner and playing a shoddy tapping game on his phone. He looked next to miserable, utterly bored out of his mind.

“Bingo,” you whispered, nudging Roman with a grin. 

Once the two of you approached him, his eyes didn’t even bother lifting from his screen. But his brows raised in acknowledgement upon hearing Roman’s voice.

“There you are, fucking hiding from us. You little sneak, you. Like a human VPN.” Roman took the seat adjacent to him, and you sat across from the two. “How you doing?”

A disgruntled noise fell from Matsson’s lips. “Eh. I’m alright. I’m just, uh… you know. You fill in the blanks.”

Your lips downturned slightly. You hadn’t spoken to Matsson personally before, but the two of you had gone to the same conferences before in the past—you were never overly fond of his character. Lazy, erratic, a pure dick-jerker. But you knew he was integral to hold up the company, so you swallowed any and all complaints you had about him.

“I hear you. Yeah. Fucking life, right?” Roman drawled in response, attempting and failing to mimic Matsson’s nonchalance.

“I just wanna find a good pussy and get out, you know?” Lukas muttered. For a brief moment, he looked away from his phone, to you. “You down?” he asked.

Rearing back in surprise, you briefly wondered if he was high on something. He probably was.

A nervous laugh slipped out of you, and you gave Roman a wide side-glare. “I’m not here to get laid.”

“Hm. Pity.” There was lust in his gaze, and you felt a wave of nausea roll over you.

To diffuse the tension, Roman quipped in a high voice, “Yeah, well—pussy’s great. Mhm. You see my mom’s at the front, there?”

Matsson snickered lowly. “Yeah. You seen my mom’s? It’s not… it’s not great.”

Roman laughed, and you begrudgingly cracked a smile at that, too.

“Wow. Yeah, sure, I’m not gonna delve too deep into that one.” Roman leaned forward. “Question—my old man got a little bit grumpy this morning, but you weren’t trying to humiliate him, right? I mean, fucking everyone says we’re the last big legacy content library, and you’re the last fucking super app streaming platform. We fit, obviously. Right?”

Finally, Matsson put his phone down to regard the two of you. He pulled a contemplative frown.

“People say we fit, yeah.”

You eyed Matsson warily, partially worried that he’d get bored of the two of you and go back to his phone. “You help prop us up, and we’ll turn GoJo into a gold mine. A tooth for a tooth.”

With guarded interest, Matsson sat up just a bit straighter. Instead of replying to you, he faced Roman and said, “She’s a bit… how do you get anything done with her around?”

An embarrassed, frustrated sort of flush heated your skin. It was beyond demeaning that he spoke to Roman as if you couldn’t hear everything he was saying. Was it because you were a woman? Because Matsson so clearly saw you as a piece of ass and nothing more?

Though Roman sent you an apologetic, slightly confused glance, he said, “Well, I don’t, really. But, uh, what are you thinking?”

Half of a shrug. “I mean, that’s great and everything, but I do have one small concern.”

“Yeah? And what’s that?” Roman asked.

“When will your father die?”

Roman’s brows flew up in shock. “When will… when will my father die?” he parroted, blinking himself out of his stupor. “Uh…”

The blonde man gestured vaguely towards him. “Like, I don’t wanna be rude, but—what kind of shape is he in? Are we talking less than a year or is it more like five years? ‘Cause if it’s five, that’s… that’s a long time. It would be better sooner, wouldn’t it?”

Roman broke out into a fit of laughter. A nervous habit, you knew.

“No, yeah, I’m laughing here, but, like—that is my dad, so, you know. Go easy there, tiger.”

Though you were well aware that Matsson clearly had a hard time speaking to you without getting a raging boner, you felt it important to voice, “Is Logan’s position on top a problem for you? For this deal?”

The corner of his lips twitched up when he spared you a look. “No, it’s just that I don’t like the idea of a man hanging over me. It’s not my world, media. Not my thing. But Logan’s death, it would… it would clear space.”

Clear space. How airily he threw about the term. A quick peek at Roman told you that he was just as uncomfortable as you were. He scratched the back of his head rather aggressively.

“Uh, I mean, we’re all obviously… hugely looking forward to my father dying,” Roman started, tapering off into a hum of forced laughter. “But, hear me out, there’d be another shape to this. How about you never ever have to speak to him? You could work out of Austin, Geneva, London, Stockholm, wherever. Totally separate corporate identities. And StarGo, we burn, obviously.”

This seemed to please Matsson immensely. It was no secret how shitty Waystar’s streaming platform was.

“Yes, yes. Please. Burn the codes and fucking acid bath those servers.”

Roman cracked a smile. “We can do that. We could do that together. I mean, GoJo, full bore. Our library, our firepower, our relationships for content. And, like, good shit. Not, like, gay moms and wheelchair kids liberal crap. Actual, popular, shit.”

A frown crossed your expression briefly. You never liked it when Roman got political. Nonetheless, you could see now that Lukas was listening intently to what the two of you had to offer. 

“You won’t have to communicate with Logan whatsoever. None of your decisions would be intercepted by him—it’d be filtered through Roman, if need be. And, you know, if it’s beneficial for you, it’d be beneficial for us,” you told him firmly whilst maintaining eye contact. You wanted him to know that you were more than capable of holding your own. 

It didn’t last long, however, because Matsson rolled his head back and blew out a sigh. “I hope you know that StarGo truly is a piece of shit.”

“It’s a huge piece of shit, yeah,” Roman agreed.

“I like to open it just to see how long it takes for the landing page to load,” Lukas said, lazily smiling. A quick glance in your direction, and he slapped at his knees. “Hey, Roman, you wanna go and take a piss on the app?”

A second’s pause. “What, like, literally?”

“Yeah.” Lukas got up to his feet.

Roman hastily stood as well, sending you an apprehensive look. “Yeah, okay, uh—” before he could finish, Matsson was already striding away. 

God. You already couldn’t stand that man.

“Go,” you told Roman. “He thinks I’m distracting. I know. I’ll be around. You just go land a meeting with him, okay? Keep him interested.”

“Okay. Yeah. Are you—? Yeah, okay. You’re great, y’know? So fucking great.” Roman squeezed your shoulder once, before he shoved his hands into his pockets and jogged after Matsson, who was already halfway to the men’s bathroom.

A heavy pit sank to the bottom of your stomach. Everybody was dancing around you, the music pounding so loudly you could feel the base vibrating the ground. There was a distinct sting to the very top of your nose—a telltale sign that you were upset, even though you were doing your very best to push it down. It was times like these you hated being a woman working in an industry made for and surrounded by men.

With pursed lips, you got up to leave the treehouse, feeling incredibly out of place in there.

And so you wove through the crowds, until you saw Kendall walking down a hall with Naomi, his shoulders tensed.

“Hey, Kendall?” you called out, quickening your pace to catch up with him.

“What do you want?” he asked, bitter. “You wanna ask for a condom so you can go fuck Matsson in my treehouse? Sorry, I don’t have one.”

He did—he always kept one in his wallet, but you didn’t need to know that.

“Yeah, no, Roman’s doing that already.” You fiddled with your hands and his eyes softened just a tad, drawing his own conclusions that you didn’t care to spell out. “Hey, uh, sorry, this is a really douche-y thing of me to ask, but… could I have the strawberry popsicle back?”

Dumbfounded, Kendall fixed you with an incredulous stare. “What?”

You cleared your throat nervously, feeling your nose begin to sting more. You weren’t quite sure if those were tears pricking your eyes, or if you were just tired. “I’ll get you another one, I promise.” 

The wrapper was still sticking out of his pocket. Melted, you knew for a fact, but you didn’t care. You wanted it, and you wanted it now.

“What? But this—this is my gift. You said you wouldn’t take this one.”

You were being an asshole. You knew it, and he knew it. “Kendall, just—just fucking give it over. It’s a popsicle! I can get you a million others after this.”

Then, you tried to reach for it, but Kendall sidestepped away from you, bumping into Naomi. 

“Yeah, but this one’s mine. You gave it to me. What is with you?” 

Your lip warbled as you inhaled sharply. “Please? I just—I really need it right now.”

There was a momentary pause as Kendall looked down at the wrapper sticking out of his pocket. In all honesty, he’d forgotten it was even there until you brought it up.

“No,” he finally said. “There’s refreshments and desserts all over this fucking place. You don’t need it.”

You bit down on the inside of your cheek. “Fuck you,” you eventually mustered, tears welling up over your waterline.

A large part of Kendall felt guilty, but he consciously took a step back away from you. “I have to go. My kids gave me a present. Rabbit wrapping. I gotta find it.”

“Eat a dick, Kendall.”

With that, he left.

You harshly wiped away any lingering dampness that spilled over your cheeks and hurried away. As you rushed to get to the bar, you caught sight of Shiv wildly dancing in the middle of the crowd, feet bare and hair tousled. 

It wasn’t long before Tom came to join you, seemingly in a glum mood himself. He was saying something about Greg and his new fixation on Kendall’s assistant, but you weren’t quite listening, merely nodding along at regular intervals.

About half an hour later, Roman finally appeared, grinning so wide it was a wonder his face didn’t split in two. By then, Shiv had joined you and Tom by the bar, breathless and cherry-cheeked.

“You okay?” Roman preened. “Onlookers reported you having some sort of breakdown. People were anxious that you might have swallowed your tongue.”

A frown crossed her lips. “I was dancing.”

“Hm. I heard it looked like a cry for help. That right, Y/N?” Roman casted a look in your direction, noting your glum atmosphere. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Before you could reply, Shiv shook her head. “Fuck you. Did you speak to Matsson?”

“I’m trying to console my friend here, Siobhan—”

“Did you speak to him?” she gritted out again, completely disregarding his initial rebuttal. 

Rolling his eyes, Roman leaned against the bar, his arm brushing yours. “Yup. I spoke to him.”

“And?”

“Don’t worry about it, Shivvy. I’ll handle it,” he snidely remarked. His arm pressed firmer up against yours. In a lowered voice, he asked, “You sure you’re good? You look all—mopey dopey over here.”

You didn’t quite know how to explain to him that you and Kendall had gotten into a tiff over a stupid popsicle, and you were sick of being reduced to the pretty woman men couldn’t take seriously. Even if you had vocalized all that, a large part of you doubted that Roman would understand any of it. He’d look at you all guilty and puppy-eyed, one of the few ways he tried to convey sympathy, and you’d kiss his cheek and tell him it was fine. That was usually how things went between the two of you, anyway.

“No, seriously, Roman,” Shiv just about growled. 

“I’m being serious,” he shot back, clearly growing agitated that Shiv just wouldn’t buzz off. And also because you weren’t talking to him, and the two of you knew well how terribly he coped with that. “I’ll talk to Dad and see if he wants to loop you in, okay?”

The aggravation written plainly over her features seemed to deepen. “Just fucking tell me! This is important, and I might need to finesse.”

“Oh, you need to finesse? That’s so kind of you to offer! But, uh, how would you finesse something that’s already done, exactly? By ruining it?” Roman jeered, crossing his arms. “Yeah, y’know what, I handled Matsson. I understand him. I’m not sure you do.”

You simply watched Shiv’s face cave in with unbridled frustration. In a way, you understood exactly how she was feeling. Though, you supposed you were more folded in than she was, given Roman’s trust in you.

“You know what, if you wanna show off to somebody, maybe show off to someone who gives a shit. Look—even Y/N doesn’t wanna hear about it!”

The two siblings looked at you, and you lifted a shoulder in a shrug.

“If you landed it, that’s all I care to know,” you gently told Roman.

A nod, and a hum. “It’s all good. Matsson peed on my phone, but we got it. And listen, Shiv, you’re having a very bad day, I know that. What with hearing that you have to continue sharing an apartment with the old meat wardrobe, but, you know—try to keep your wig on.”

There was a certain fire to Shiv’s eyes, darting between the two of you angrily. “I’m the one in a functioning relationship. You guys are fucked up emotionally and using each other as crutches to feel better about yourselves.”

Now that… that struck a nerve. She was right, you knew it, but you never liked facing your and Roman’s codependency head-on. It was an uncomfortable truth that the two of you were quite comfortable not dwelling on.

“Oh, really?” Roman retorted. “I thought you were thinking about all the dick you were gonna ride while he was behind bars? Hm?”

“Oh, my fucking God,” Shiv hissed in incredulous disbelief. “You know what? Nobody likes talking about me fucking guys as much as you do. Why is that? Is that because you’re the COO who can’t fuck?”

This seemed to stun Roman into silence. His eyes flickered over to your silent form, staring down at your half-empty drink. Shiv caught the way he looked over at you, a cruel scoff hitching in her throat.

“Huh. Can’t even get it up for Y/N?”

A deep breath in, and Roman was quick to push the argument back onto Shiv. “Did you think Tom was going to go to jail?”

“No. I’m happy he’s not going.”

“Oh, I’m sure you are! You look really happy. Fucking rainbows and sunshine plastered all over you. Did you think he was, though? Just a smidge? Maybe Dad would go to jail, too? Oh, and maybe I’d go, too! And because Kendall’s all fucked up in the head, you’d… oh, you’d be able to sit on your little throne. It’d be all about you. You thought it was ladies’ night and they were playing your song, but guess what? You were wrong! All the men got together in the man club and we decided, sweetheart, everything’s fine, so just—”

A cord within you snapped.

“Roman,” you sternly barked out. “Shut the fuck up. We get it.”

“Don’t talk for me,” Shiv haughtily told you, before fixing her brother with a fiery glare. “He’s just using you as a messenger boy, but as usual, you’re too fucking dumb to see it.”

“Right. Mhm. It’s difficult for you, I know. It’s hard to have to do the dance for Dad because you just suck at dancing,” Roman sneered. 

“You’re a piece of shit,” said Shiv. 

Clearly on a roll, Roman just kept talking: “It turns out he loves it when I do the Daddy dance, but I guess that’s because he loves me.” He was feeding himself lies. Logan didn’t even have to do it anymore—Roman was desperate enough to believe it. “He loves fucking me, and he just doesn’t want to fuck you anymore.”

“What are you even talking about? You’re so fucking gross!” Shiv just about yelled.

The two fell into more bickering, but it faltered away when Kendall showed up out of nowhere. You glanced at his pocket—the popsicle wrapper was gone.

“Oh, shit. Look who it is! It’s birthday boy!” Roman greeted in a condescending manner. 

Kendall looked upset—far more upset than when you’d confronted him about the popsicle.

“Neither of you should be here,” Kendall gruffly said. “You shouldn’t be at my fucking party.”

“Oh, God, you’re right. Someone call the cops. Intruders have breached the masturbatorium!” Laughing, Roman took your drink and finished what was left of it. You stared down at the empty glass with pursed lips.

Finally, you looked up at Kendall. “You find the rabbit wrapping?” you quietly asked him. 

He didn’t answer your question. Instead, he stared at you for a moment before slowly saying, “I threw away the popsicle. Melted.”

That hurt a lot more than you would admit it did. “Oh,” was all you said.

Roman looked back and forth between the two of you, wondering what on earth he’d missed while he was up watching Matsson piss on his phone.

“You guys are full of shit,” Kendall said. “You came here to fuck me behind my back. You’re ghouls, and you’re disgusting.”

“Sorry. Whoops,” Roman replied, though he didn’t sound sorry at all.

Then, Kendall turned to call a few security guards lining the walls. “Can we get them out?”

“It’s a little late for that, buddy. I already spoke to Matsson. He hates you, by the way—laughs at you constantly,” Roman harshly quipped. 

Shiv shook her head. “Just stop, Roman.”

“What? Go easy on the birthday boy?”

Stone-faced, Kendall stepped closer to his siblings. “Did you come here to see me at all? You didn’t, did you?”

Shiv spared him a sharp, unapologetic smile. “Well, we haven’t been getting along that great recently, so what do you think? You surprised?”

A mutter and a shake of his head. “GoJo was my idea,” Kendall said. “You stole my idea.”

Raising his brows, Roman jeered, “What are you, fucking six? Dude, you lost. No big deal, no need to cry about it.” 

“None of it would matter if you bought out, Kendall,” you said, only barely loud enough for him to hear. “You don’t have to keep biting the hand that’s feeding you. The cage is open.”

A crackling silence. Kendall looked pained, for a second.

“You’re just a stuck-up cunt that can’t bear to see me win,” Roman said, deciding he wanted to have the final blow.

Kendall sized up to him, getting up close to his face. “You’re not a real person,” he said. “You know that? You’re not fucking real.”

Unflinching, Roman stared up at his brother. “Come on. Why don’t you hit me, maybe?”

“Rome—” you began, but he made a protesting noise.

“Come on, shitty Jesus! You know you want to. Just fucking hit me. Do it!”

Kendall watched his brother, eyes empty. Or full of despair. It was the same either way. With that, he stepped away and began to walk off.

“Ugh, look, I’m sorry, okay? Happy birthday—” Roman strode up to him and placed a hand on his back.

Accident or not, Roman pushed, and Kendall fell. He laughed, then apologized, then laughed again. Connor was there, all of a sudden, telling them to lay off each other.

All this time, you hadn’t moved a muscle. Maybe you were still mad about the popsicle. Maybe it was Matsson. Maybe it was the dysfunctional fucking family you were stuck in between.

Kendall forcefully yelled at Connor to take his coat off, and stormed off. Shiv left a few minutes later, mumbling out how much of an asshole they all were. 

“I want to leave, Roman,” you told him, and his giggling subsided, finally.

“Oh, yeah—fuck, yeah. We did what we came here for. Let’s go.”

Down the stairs, out the vagina (or was it in?), and back into the real world. Roman was saying something, but your ears were buzzing with the aftershocks of the loud music.

You hadn’t even registered Roman telling the driver to fuck off, that he wanted to walk you home. Chivalry wasn’t dead, after all. 

Once inside your house, you tugged your shoes off with a sigh and shed your clothes as soon as you stepped into your room. You just wanted to go to sleep.

Roman peeled off his suit jacket, before sitting down at the edge of your bed. “Hey, I have a proposition for you.”

At first, you genuinely believed that whatever he wanted to say was business-related. But upon looking at him, his dilated pupils, his mussed hair, his spread legs—his proposition was very obviously far from professional intent. 

It was a distraction. A good one, one that you were more than willing to take. You clambered onto the bed, straddled his thighs and leaned over him, your nose brushing his.

“Yeah, Romeo?”

“Let’s have sex. Like, actual peen in vageen type of situation.”

You weren’t drunk, but you were tired, and yet you found yourself nodding with hooded eyes. 

“You sure?” you whispered, low and raspy, as if you’d swallowed a handful of gravel. 

High-pitched, he affirmed with, “Uh-huh.”

You brushed your lips over his, only barely there. Roman jerked forward to kiss you properly, but you leaned back. “Say it, Roman.”

He swallowed, throat bobbing. “I’m sure.”

With the green light, the two of you began to peel away the few remaining articles of clothing you had on, your mouths slanted hotly against one another as you ground over his growing erection. It wasn’t exactly a kiss—more like the two of you were just breathing each other in, sighs and pants and whimpers all.

His hands seemed unsure what to do. Clenching at the bedsheets, grazing over your side, groping at your bare breasts, pressed up against him. His mouth fell away from yours with a particularly loud whine, sinking lower to dig his teeth into your shoulder. You smelled like honey, but you didn’t taste like it. Saltier, more human. A breathless curse fell from his lips, muffled into your skin.

“Inside,” he pleaded. “Fuck, I need—please turn around—can I?”

It was hard to think straight when you could feel his dick twitching, the tip continuously brushing against your clit, sending electrifying jolts throughout your whole body. You hummed, rolling your hips over his one last time, before crawling off his lap towards the center of the bed, your back facing him. A part of you wondered if there was a reason why Roman wanted to fuck you in a less intimate position for your first time together. The other, more lust-addled part of you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

Roman’s hands slipped over your waist, and he sank his throbbing cock into your slickened cunt with a pitching groan, tapering off into a whine. 

“So fucking good, Rome,” you cried out once he began unevenly thrusting, pawing at your hips as he grew more desperate—close to his release even though he’d barely even begun.

The sex itself was—it was quick, to say the least. It was clumsy, as well—but he managed to reach over and rub tight circles over your clit, which elicited a choked cry from you. At one point, you swore you felt his lips on your back, but you couldn’t be certain.

When he came, fucking spurts of hot spend into you, you shuddered violently as your orgasm crashed not two seconds later, gasping into your sheets. He thrusted into you a few more times—he liked the overstimulation, your rumbling moans, the way his cum began to trickle down your thigh.

And, finally, he eased himself out, wincing as he sank into the spot beside you. 

He panicked, just a little bit, when you pulled yourself away, getting onto your feet. 

Noticing his jerky demeanor, you offered him a soft expression. “Bathroom,” you said as a form of explanation.

That made Roman relax a bit. 

When you returned, you’d pulled on a comfortable white shirt, before slipping beneath the covers. The two of you laid together, staring at the ceiling, staring at each other, staring at your hands—intertwining together on top of the blanket.

“I’m sorry,” he croaked out, after ages of silence.

Your eyes darted up to meet his, molten brown downcast with shame. 

“For what?”

A click of his tongue, a roll of his eyes. “For—for the shitty fucking sex.”

You barked out a laugh, and Roman appeared mildly offended. 

“It was great, Ro. I actually came, which is more than what I can say for most people I’ve been with. Kudos to you,” you said, grinning cheekily.

“Really? It wasn’t too—was I—?”

“Roman. It was good,” you reassured, shifting closer so that you could press your nose to his cheek. “What do you want me to say? That I saw stars? My throat hurts from how much I screamed your name?”

This seemed to crack Roman’s insecure exterior, and he guffawed lightly. “You bitch. Fuck you.”

“Fuck you, too.” Another moment of silence. You let go of his hand, watching him carefully. “Roman?”

“Mmh?”

“Did you fuck me to prove a point? Because of what… what Shiv said?”

The air crackled with uncertainty. Roman squinted at nothing in particular. 

Eventually, Roman crooned, “You know I’ve been wanting to stick my dick in you ever since we hit our first fucking round of puberty. You know that, right? That means we were little baby teenagers and I was fucking—fantasizing about dicking you down when I should’ve been doing my homework.” 

It felt like a weight lifted off your chest—a weight you hadn’t even known was there. “Ew, Roman. You’re gross.”

He groaned loudly, dramatically tossing an arm up to cover his eyes. “Don’t say that. I’ll get hard again.”

[loveandthings11]

How Deep My Love Goes, Chapter 12

Read on AO3 Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4 Ch 5 Ch 6 Ch 7 Ch 8 Ch 9 Ch 10 Ch 11

Fic Summary: A Kenrava-focused fix-it alongside canon 💗

Chapter Summary: SEASON 2 ERA! Roman makes his decision. Kendall and Stewy kick off the business media frenzy around the hostile takeover. Kendall works on saving Vaulter against all odds. Rava and Kendall take a trip to her parents’ house. Featuring Kendall in glasses!

New Year's Day

In here, it’s surreal.

Kendall looks over at his suit jacket flung over the armchair, Brioni pants wrinkled on the floor. He sees Rava’s messy hair draped over her peaceful face, lipstick smeared the way he wanted it. A pile of blue silk is by the door because it wasn’t staying on past the click of the lock. A news broadcast comes over the radio and he turns it off. He doesn’t need to hear it- there’s no news bigger than what he did yesterday.

Outside, Logan’s calling him a druggie. Shiv’s rolling her eyes as “insane,” “unhinged,” spill out of her lips and Tom nods at everything he hears. Outside, Roman’s pacing nervously, Tabitha’s pouring Bailey’s in her coffee and watching him decide his future. Greg’s looking around, plotting, deciding nothing and waiting for the next possibility to walk in. Marcia’s shaking her head, Connor’s condemning his little brother for the loss of family harmony that wasn’t really there. Outside, they’re waiting.

But in here, Kendall is a king. It’s New Year’s Day and no one can touch him. His birthright is coming. He’s never loved the sunrise so much.

The door knocker thunks on the heavy wooden door and Kendall gets up to answer it because kings don’t hide. Roman’s right there when he pulls it partially open like Austerlitz deja vu.

“So, I kind of have to talk to you,” Roman starts.

Kendall glances back at Rava, still asleep, and steps outside the door, closing it quietly behind him and turning to look skeptically at his brother. He’s feeling generous enough to give him a chance to explain what happened.

“Uh, yeah, I guess you do have to talk to me. Where were you last night?” Kendall asks. Roman’s reluctant and rubs the back of his head.

“I was talking to Dad, okay?”

Kendall smiles into the scoff, like he knew it.

“Right. Okay. Yeah, you know what, bro, not everyone’s cut out for this. So don’t worry about it. I’m sure Dad will find a nice little cage for you at the studio again.”

Roman rolls his eyes and tries not to take the bait.

“Maybe I can tell you some shit you didn’t already know, can you consider that?” Kendall stays quiet against his instinct and Roman sighs. “Look. I don’t think it’s outside the realm of possibility that you will crash and burn, because, I mean-“ he gestures at Kendall. “-you’re you.”

“That’s not going to happen. Do you have a point?” Kendall replies evenly. It won’t take much to tip things into being overwhelming and he wants to focus on the good parts of this day.

“Fucking- obviously,” Roman says, irritated. He continues slowly. “How would you feel about me, maybe, giving you some information- when I deem it’s good for me- and maybe just generally not totally fucking you?”

“Wow. That’s a really great deal for nobody,” Kendall says. “I told you before, Dad’s going to do nothing for you like he did nothing for me. Dude, I had an actual job at Waystar and he did what he did. I mean, what- what do you think he’s going to do to you?”

“I don’t fucking know, Ken, but I don’t want to kill him like you do.”

He feels the barb’s intended pain and really wishes Roman wouldn’t think that.

“What- how do you not understand how much I didn’t want to do this?” he asks incredulously. He shakes his head and tries to connect in a more gentle, intense way, looking right into Roman’s eyes. “I didn’t. But it’s happening. And I am taking over. Dad’s time is ending. You can still hop on the lifeboat. Heading to dry land, bro.”

“Well, maybe stop this attempt at poetry and listen to me. This can help you. Look, I planned the vote with you, I actually- puke- agree with certain parts of your vision-“

“Because my vision is fucking good-“ Kendall interjects.

“-And buying stations to indoctrinate some local tinfoil hat fucks is not the- the- thing. But I am not risking my life for a ‘lifeboat’ made of, like, popsicle sticks and your childhood dreams. So, take it or leave it. I might save you by telling you valuable shit.”

“Or you might try to sink me.”

“If you annoy me. Which is highly likely, I’m just being honest.”

Kendall rubs his forehead.

“Negotiating against yourself. Good luck out there. Well, I’m obviously not going to tell you anything. You’re asking to be a double agent. I don’t even- who does that? Honestly, I can get information from other sources.” Kendall remembers his talk with Greg last night, his bumbling blackmail that Kendall found both amusing and concerning. But he knows Greg’s loyalty will go to the highest bidder. If he buys it, it’s his. With Roman it’s more complicated.

Roman tries a new, genuine appeal.

“This…” Roman gestures between them, “this has been nice. Like, is there a way where it doesn’t have to be… you know?”

Kendall feels torn. It has been nice. He’d missed Roman when he’d been in LA, and they hardly see each other even when they’re both in New York.

“You know I wanted you on board,” Kendall says with disappointment. He remembers that it’s not only his choice. “I think you’re being wishy washy, but I’m pretty sure Stewy and Sandy will have stronger language than that to describe it.”

Roman raises his eyebrows and looks down and away. It makes Kendall feel achy and want to change his mind.

“Okay. Open offer.” Roman gives him an unreadable look before turning and walking toward the dining room for breakfast.

The slight bump of the wood when Kendall closes the door upon re-entering the bedroom makes Rava stir.

“Mmm. What are you doing? Come back.” She’s never liked that he gets up before her and he’s spent most weekend mornings of his adult life as a pillow for an extra hour or two. It’s always been his time to secretly send Saturday and Sunday work emails, but he doesn’t think he can even pretend to want to lie down now. He’s vibrating with energy, conflict, worries, excitement. He goes to sit on the bed and brushes her hair off her face. She softly holds his hand with both of hers and he smiles at how sweet she is when she’s still half-asleep.

“You want to get breakfast?” he asks quietly. “Come with me. Not here, we’ll go somewhere.”

“Mmhmm.” She opens her eyes and squints at him. “Okay. Are the kids up?”

“I don’t know, I just got up myself.”

“Okay.” She sits up with the sheet loose around her and he suddenly needs to be close and scoops her toward him for a comforting hug. It’s going to be okay. She’s still sleepy and melts into him easily for a minute as he breathes in her scent. She rolls out of bed and he admires her bare skin as she walks around looking for the robe she’d brought. “Where is that robe..?” she asks.

“I’m not telling you,” he replies, eyes not leaving her body.

“Okay. Great, thank you,” she smiles sarcastically and nods along before spotting the robe and wrapping it around herself.

After throwing on a pair of dark jeans and a beige sweater and looking effortlessly chic, Rava goes into the kids’ room and Kendall gets ready to sneak past the sure-to-be-awkward breakfast to find something in town before flying home.

……

The kids sleep in a back bedroom of the jet while Rava dozes with her head on Kendall’s shoulder. Jet lag, post-wedding exhaustion, and hangovers are winning this day for everyone else. Kendall puts his arm around her and silently practices his talking points for the news appearances he and Stewy will be flooded with once they’re back in the city. Stewy smirks at his phone as he texts and sips coffee with his soft leather loafers up on a footstool and blankets draped over him on his reclined seat. Roman had declared that he was going with Tabitha on Logan’s jet because Dad said so, so it’s just the three of them. Stewy looks up and nods at Kendall’s notecards.

“You ready?” Stewy whispers to Kendall. “PGN first.” Kendall nods seriously. “So what’s up with your brother?” Stewy inquires, keeping his voice down. “He pass out in a bathroom with his dick in his hand?”

“Uh, he went to talk to Dad. He came to me this morning and offered to inform on him, but obviously he’s just doing Dad’s bidding now,” Kendall reports a little emotionlessly.

Stewy’s eyes widen and he tilts his head with a slight look of disbelief.

“He got stuck, huh? Cool, Sandy’s gonna love that. It’ll look great for me that I vouched for him. Fucker.”

“Yeah. I know. I told him we’re not gonna talk to him.”

Stewy considers and crosses his legs, taking a bite of the croissant on the table next to him.

“You know what? Tell him we’ll take his information.”

Kendall perks up a bit.

“…yeah?”

Kendall picks up his phone, glad that someone else also thinks it’s a good plan to stay in touch.

“Yeah. But Ken,” Stewy says in his relaxed warning tone. “Don’t tell him anything."

“I won’t.”

After a nap and more quiet prep on the long flight back to New York, Kendall and Stewy meet back up at the entrance to PGN. The weather is getting quite chilly now but they don’t even notice as they go inside. They walk together onto the news floor when the elevator doors open, both in dark suits and feeling exactly as psyched as they’d always imagined they would be.

“Fucking… PGN. Hope they let me out alive,” Kendall chuckles. It’s not even close to his first time on TV, but it’s his first time doing it purely for his own business interests, and it’s certainly his first time on the rival network. He feels a bit untethered. Unleashed.

“Don’t worry. It’s the perfect first stop. We’ll be taken care of,” Stewy says knowingly as they make it into the labyrinth of a studio.

They approach the cameras via a long, dark hallway. The doorway shines blindingly bright light down the center. He fidgets with his notecards as they forge ahead in the weird spotlight.

The light is overwhelming all around them once they get inside. The makeup artists swarm and suddenly powder puffs and combs and chatter surround them both as they sit down in director’s chairs. A stylish and nervous-looking thirty-something PGN producer scurries over and tucks her light brown hair behind her ear as she smiles at Stewy. His eyes are instantly glued to hers. He gives her a serene smile back and Kendall can see her blush a bit.

“Stewy, I’m so glad you’re here,” she says sweetly. “I mean, we all are.” She extends her hand to Kendall. “You’re Kendall! Hi, I’m Lena,” she introduces herself, only briefly taking her eyes off Stewy’s face.

“Hey, yeah. Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

“Ken, Lena’s here to make you seem like you know almost as much as me,” Stewy says smoothly. Lena giggles and Stewy twinkles at her. “She’s brilliant. Taught me everything I know about looking incredible on TV.”

Lena looks pleased and flustered for a second as she reaches back to check the claw clip in her hair.

“Oh, well, you’re a natural.” She gives him a pretty smile and gazes at him again for a second too long before forcing her attention back to the task at hand. “Um, so, I have some talking points for you both from your PR team.” She pulls some printed sheets from her tote bag and hands them to Kendall and Stewy. “Normally we wouldn’t do this, but, you know.” She drops her eyes after such a clear flirty moment. “I’ll let you go over them, and I’ll be right over here if you have any questions. About filming,” she clarifies. “I can’t answer questions about your PR. Obviously,” she laughs a little breathlessly. She turns to walk away and almost trips over a cable before going to stand with the other members of her team on the other side of the room and gazing over not-so-subtly.

Stewy watches her go as his eyes wander from the floor to her hair. Kendall looks over at him.

“Okay. Had to hit PGN first,” he smirks.

“You and your precious optics know this is where we have to start.” Stewy smiles a little. “But, yeah, it helps to have a supportive environment.”

“Uh-huh.” Kendall smiles and feels a pang of missing Rava.

“Anka was too freaked out by everything, you know? Who throws sex parties with severe anxiety issues? Lena’s… you know.”

“Yeah. Very chill,” Kendall deadpans. “She might have a heart attack if she overhears this conversation.”

“She’s like that every time she talks to me. It’s funny. She takes five minutes to type a sentence in a text,” Stewy shrugs. Kendall decides not to point out that Stewy could only know that if he watches the three dots for five minutes.

“Basket cases are your thing,” Kendall chuckles.

“That’s true, Ken, I do like spending time with disastrous people,” Stewy smiles pointedly. “It emphasizes to others how together I am.”

Kendall nods, playing along. It is a little nerve-wracking to think about the high expectations that everyone watching will have of him. Right now, maybe twenty people know what’s going on. In five minutes, it’ll be millions.

“Right. Hang on a second.” Kendall gets up and pulls his phone out of his pocket. He dials Rava and is glad to hear her voice.

“Hey! How’s the interview prep?” she asks.

“Hey. Good,” he confirms. “We’re about to go on. You watching?”

“Of course,” she replies. She’s a little apprehensive about the whole thing. Logan isn’t nice when he’s threatened.

“Good. Good. Hey, tonight can we just do takeout and hideout?”

“Yes. That sounds so good.” She pauses and he's quiet. “You okay? Worried about this?” She’s always advised him to think about the incoming peacefulness after the big event to calm jitters.

“Uh, kind of,” he admits. “I dunno. It’s great but it’s also, like… this makes it real.”

“There you go,” Rava smiles. “It is real.”

“Yeah. Fuck.”

A man wearing a headset pops his head into the side room.

“Two minutes!” he says.

“Thank you,” Kendall answers. “Okay, time to go. Time to make it fuckin’ happen.”

“Good luck!”

Kendall puts his phone in his pocket, walks back into the space and sits down next to Stewy at the desk set. The lights go down around the set and they look at each other in a moment of pure exhilaration. Memories flash through their minds of being seventeen and sneaking liquor in the Roys’ sprawling gardens while discussing their plans to take over the world.

A voice comes from the dark and everyone else goes quiet. Kendall closes his eyes for a second.

“Okay, we’re live in three, two….”

The on-air light lights up.

It’s a new world.

“I’m here with Kendall Roy, former Waystar Royco executive and son of current CEO Logan Roy, and Stewy Hosseini, partner at Maesbury Capital,” the reporter begins. “Kendall, we’ll start with you. You must feel strongly about this to go up against your father this way. What made you do it?”

Kendall focuses every bit of his energy on his response, breathes in, and lets the words he’s been repeating in his mind free.

“My father is a brilliant businessman. A true legend. And what he’s built here is unlike any other corporation in the world. His legacy can never be tarnished. In fact, one of the reasons Stewy and I decided to do this is to preserve it. The old ways of doing things are not viable in today’s world, and I can’t allow the firm to stay still when there’s a race all around it. I have always been of the mind that we need to move forward in order to shepherd Waystar Royco into the new era. I believe our focus on moving more deeply into the tech sector is critical to the success of the company moving forward and I am confident that I am the right person to lead us into the future as CEO.”

“Thank you. It must be an exciting moment for you. But how are things between you and your father?” she asks, clearly even more interested in this answer.

Kendall smiles, but it flickers. He knows this is the part everyone is listening to most closely.

“Uh, you know.” He keeps smiling uneasily into it. “They’re- we’re good. This is just the way things are, business-wise.”

“Great. And Stewy-“

Kendall practically blacks out in his mind while Stewy gets into the financial details. They’re really doing it.

About an hour and a half later, Kendall walks into the apartment and breathes it in for a moment. He’s back and it’s all under way. He walks down the hall toward the family room and Rava, who beckons him over to the couch.

He opens his arms and smiles for a minute on the other side of the room.

“How fucking amazing is this?” he says.

“It actually is,” she says honestly. She can’t believe he’s finally taken a bold step against Logan.

They’re both feeling exhausted after a weekend full of exertion, and he flops down on the couch next to her and nuzzles into her neck for a minute. She smells like fresh conditioner and light perfume.

“What a day you’ve had,” she smiles as he lets himself fall into her lap and she runs her fingers through his hair.

“Yeah. Can’t believe it.” He means it. Things have begun to feel vividly real. His phone buzzes and he pulls it from his pocket and takes a look.

“Text from Roman,” he says. “They’re all at the Hamptons house.” He pauses and feels a bit left out even though he knows it would make no sense for him to be there right now. Before he can say anything else, his phone vibrates again and he almost laughs out loud at the next message.

“Shiv?! Rav, Dad’s having individual meetings and he just called in Shiv. For what? Political advice? Is Roman making this shit up? She said she’s with Gil. She changed her mind already? Well, she’s already fucked herself if she’s going back and forth, politics to business. Dad won’t go for that, right?”

He sits up and stares at his phone.

“Well, you don’t know what he’s thinking. Trying to read his mind isn’t going to work here,” Rava says. “Don’t drive yourself crazy. I’m sure it’s nothing.”

He sighs quietly to himself and realizes that Dad actually is picking a new him this time. It’s just what he’d previously feared with Roman, only now it’s worse. It's Shiv, who is so inexperienced that she might believe Dad would pick someone with no experience. It doesn’t matter, he reminds himself, because he’s going to claim his rightful place. There is no new him.   

But he pictures Shiv in Dad’s Summer Palace office all the same.

He stews over the image for a few minutes. He feels jealous and protective of his little sister at once and struggles to remember to focus his energy on his own plans. A few minutes after Rava goes to have a snack, his phone rings. His skin prickles and his heart races when he sees Dad on his screen. He looks around a bit wildly at first, wondering where Rava is and realizing there’s not enough time. Instinct takes over and he answers it.

“Dad?” he manages.

“Kendall.” Logan’s voice is calm and almost eerily pleasant. “How is it out there in the cold?”

“It’s-“ he tries to speak. “You-you know, Dad, I didn’t want to do what I did- I-“

“I’ve been getting a lot of advice,” Logan starts smoothly, slowly. “Laird… Shiv… anyone with the stones to try to stand up to me tells me I should sell.”

The confusion is clouding Kendall’s previously sharpened mind.

“Uh-huh?”

“I was wondering- what do you think?”

Kendall thinks he can hear electricity crackle.

“Uh- what- what do you mean-“

“Well, you’ve been inside for a while. What do you think I should do?” The mind games are overwhelming.

“W- what is this, a joke? I don’t- Dad, we shouldn’t even be talking-“

“Enough. It was a good move. Now it’s time to come back in.” Kendall can barely believe what he’s hearing.

“What- so you can keep things exactly the same and never do what you promised?” He shakes his head. “No.”

“Oh, cut your self-righteous shit,” Logan thunders. Kendall is intimidated into silence. “We’re gonna fight this. And I want you by my side. The deal is, if you can stop Sandy and Stewy, then I will make you the next chief executive of the firm, like we planned. You’re the one, son.”

Shock reverberates through Kendall’s body. He struggles to collect his thoughts, to breathe properly. When was his last breath? Has it been too long? He suddenly inhales and tries to summon his own words to Roman earlier this morning.

“It- it wasn’t true when you said it before. For eighteen months. For fucking- thirty-two years, you said it, and you took it back.”

“You made a mistake, Ken. With Vaulter. This is my company. I have the right.” Kendall thinks he should argue, then decides against it. But he can’t help himself.

“Vaulter was a solid buy. But sure. You have the right. So why should I believe this?” Part of him is yearning against his will for a definite answer he knows Logan would never give.

“Because now, we’ve got eyes on us. The news fucks, the shareholders. Thanks to you,” Logan grumbles. “Thing is, you know both sides, you have the years." Well, no fucking kidding, Kendall thinks. “This is rare. But you have leverage. Let’s get back to work,” Logan says. Kendall can practically feel the steamrolling and tries to keep himself upright.

He realizes his dad may not trust Roman. Roman knows what was going on with Kendall’s side too, but Logan wants to hear it from Kendall. His head is swirling with thoughts. Is he on speaker? Is everyone listening and waiting to laugh if he says yes? He knows it’s stronger to end the call right now. But… the office. The chair. The respect, the head of the boardroom. The authority, the job, the usefulness. The fulfillment. He nervously grabs the edge of the couch cushion he’s sitting on.

He’s dying to say yes. But even in the face of all the temptation, he knows it could only end in humiliation if he went back. His dad would think of all kinds of ways to make him pay, all kinds of tests, a round of boar on the floor where he’s the only one begging for scraps. Rava’s disappointment, Stewy’s disdain... he can’t do it.

“Dad- I- I really wish I could trust you. I mean, you know I… I just- I can’t.”

Logan’s anger is almost as scary on the phone as it is in person.

“But you can trust Sandy, enemy of this family your whole life? And Stewy, who wouldn’t even go against me in your little board vote? But not me. Not the one who’s given you everything you’ve ever had. Is that right?”

Kendall’s heart is pounding. It’s terrifying, but he’s steeling himself.

“Yes, Dad. I wanted to believe you. But after everything the last couple of months, I can’t.” He takes a deep breath. “This is on my terms now.”

Logan’s voice turns violent. “I’ll grind you into dust. You’ll be nothing. You’ll finally realize it.”

Kendall tries to keep the words out, but they crash around him in waves for a terrible moment. He remembers every late night spent working, the entire year in Shanghai spent doing everything he could to make long-distance work with Rava, the times defending his kids from Logan’s derision, all to be treated like this. He feels the habitual need to remind himself of the good moments too, but hearing what his dad just said makes him stop himself. The fury, the threats, the derogatory comments about his recovery, his family, his strategies. His whole being. He leaves his body for a moment to say it.

“You’re a fuckin’ beast.”

Kendall hangs up and drops his phone onto the couch cushion. His hands are shaking and he knows his voice probably was, too. He nervously walks into the kitchen to find Rava and she tilts her head in a question when she sees him.

“Dad called,” he breathes. “He’s going to fight. But so are we.”

……

That night, they lie in bed in the dark. Blackout curtains have made it velvety dark in their room. They don’t always use the blackouts, but Kendall pressed the button to close them tonight. Rava looks expectantly at the spot she can feel him lying, wondering why he's so far. She reaches her arm out and feels for his head, lightly patting its crown.

“Hey,” she says softly. “What’s going on in here?”

She can hear him open his mouth and exhale.

“Do you think- this is dumb, but, do you think he even likes me? Like, as a person?” He pauses and hesitantly adds, “I don’t think he does.”

“Oh… Ken, of course he does.” She doesn’t know if Logan is capable of liking anyone, but he’s always been pretty obsessed with his son.

“No, I mean, well, thank you for- for saying that but like, really? If someone asked him what my good qualities were, what would he even say?”

“You have so many. You’re kind, you’re creative, you get inspired all the time-“

“But-” he shakes his head in a bit of embarrassment at this incredibly vulnerable moment. He’s glad it’s dark. “But he doesn’t like any of those things.”

“He never leaves you alone,” she says. “Just today, even when, from his perspective, you’ve been trying to destroy him for the last couple of months.”

“That’s not-“

“I know. But from his perspective,” she continues. “He tries to keep you leashed to him all the time. He always has.”

“But that’s like… sick,” Kendall replies uncertainly. “Yeah? That’s weird. People have told me that’s weird.”

They’ve talked about this before, but it’s been a few years. She remembers this kind of talk with less fondness than many of their other conversations.

“Yes. It’s weird. I mean, he isn’t normal or healthy. Obviously,” she lets out a mirthless chuckle. “But as much as he is capable of liking someone, I think he likes you.” Kendall is quiet, which is what he does when he sort of disagrees but doesn’t know how to argue. “He must like that you tend see the future in business.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.” Kendall wrings his hands at the thought of Vaulter being in his father’s power.

“It is! When have you ever been wrong about what direction to go in?” He’s quiet again, this time because there’s no counterargument. “You can’t argue that he likes that you have a sense of things!”

He can’t cheer for himself.

“I have a feeling he likes that quality more in other people than he likes it in me.” He lies there thinking of the people who don’t like him. The Canadians, the Vaulter staff, the art people… Roman? Shiv? He doesn’t say anything else but Rava can feel it.

The depth of his insecurity shouldn’t surprise her anymore, but it breaks her heart a little when it becomes so clear. She moves closer to him and lays her hand on his chest. She wants to tell him the validation from his father doesn’t matter, but she thinks when she’s said something for nearly two decades and it hasn’t sunk in, it might be time to give him what he wants instead of what he needs. Tonight, she can tell him a good truth instead of a hard one.

“You know he sees you as competition. Who else does he ever go toe-to-toe with? Hmm? And there is nothing your dad likes more than a completely insane business competition.”

She feels the vibration of a smile from him.

“Well, I can’t argue with that.”

“Yeah!” She says more cheerfully, grateful that her point landed. “You give him what he really wants. I actually think you might be the one person who doesn’t bore him.”

He considers that.

“I just… feel… this is going to ensure that he’ll never really trust me again. Like, I used to be his go-to. For everything.” Remembering the good moments he'd held off before makes him want to call Logan and tell him he wants to come back.

“I know," Rava says. "Don't forget what he did though-“ she uses a softer tone- “the takeover wasn’t the thing that changed his mind. He made the decision when he took back the announcement. And he did fire you. All i'm saying is you're not losing a close relationship right now. At the very least, you know he respects this."

He says nothing while he thinks over all of her ideas. He hears how negative he’s being and brings up something positive so she won’t think he’s a wet blanket.

“I guess… it’s true, he’s never accused me of boring him.”

“See? There you go. Come here.” She reaches for him and he rolls into her arms. She's glad it’s over and that she’s partially scrubbed the negative thoughts from his head for the night. His forehead rests on her shoulder as he wonders whether he should try to say what the even deeper problem is.

“It’s kind of fucking… hollow even if we win, though. If he never gives it to me, you know… if he never thought I could do it.”

His words float in the darkness for a moment.

“It would still be achieving what you’ve always wanted.”

“Well. You know, there were kind of two parts to what I wanted.”

“Yeah,” she says a little sadly.

“I- I know you think it shouldn’t matter,” he says hesitantly.

“I just wish it didn’t matter,” Rava says. They go quiet as she drapes her arm over him.

He’s had parts of this conversation with her and others over the years, with varying degrees of empathy reflected back. But this part has always been where no one could come with him, where no one hears him, no one understands.

…….

A few days later, Roman saunters up behind Kendall and Rava as they walk through the amusement park keeping an eye on Sophie and her friends at her birthday party.

“I’m here as a spy, in case you were wondering,” Roman announces. “Just here to check out whether Dad has anything to worry about. Obviously he doesn’t with this fucker in charge!” he adds loudly.

Rava shoots him a look.

“Dude,” Kendall sighs. The kids are here.

“Can we talk about what Sandy’s thinking the next steps are?” Roman asks impatiently.

“I’m here to enjoy my daughter’s birthday party. We’ll talk later.” Kendall glances at Rava for her approval. She’s glad to hear it even though she knows his head is full of strategy.

Sophie runs over and flings her arms around Kendall’s waist. He squeezes her and meets her eyes as she looks up at him.

“Can we make the wagon go faster?” she asks him. Kendall looks at the ride attendant as he adjusts his scarf. It’s getting colder outside.

“Is that possible?” he inquires. Rava leans in to talk to the attendant.

“No, no.” She looks at Sophie. “Honey, let’s stay safe, okay? We’re going to keep all the rides at their normal speeds.”

Sophie pouts for a moment and runs back to her friends. Rava follows to keep an eye on things and Roman smirks at Kendall.

“So, it must be fun to have no authority at home, no authority at work, you’re killin’ it!”

“You don’t understand responsibility,” Kendall replies dully.

“Nope, never been for me. I do understand having a personality though, which you have clearly lost!” He points at his brother for emphasis and is disappointed by his lack of reaction. “Hey, do you think Sophie thinks it’s weird that her grandpa isn’t at her birthday party?”

“Why, because he’s been so involved in his grandchildren’s lives before this?” Kendall almost smiles.

Roman snickers a little regretfully and they share a moment of dry humor.

“You know Shiv and Tom are here, keeping their distance.” Roman jerks his head behind him and to the left. Kendall looks alarmed.

“Uh, what? No. Is that- I mean, is she cool right now? What’s the deal with her and Dad?”

“I don’t fucking know, Tom’s here to be a freak and look at what he doesn’t have to deal with anymore because Firecrotch got him promoted to run the most important branch of the company,” Roman scoffs. Kendall glances back and calms down. They can’t do anything here.

“Well- I mean, it’s not really surprising that Tom’s at ATN now. Like… that figures.”

Roman’s eyes dance.

“Because he understands our ‘agricultural viewers?’” he says mockingly.

“Because he might actually believe some of that shit.”

“I believe that shit,” Roman says sardonically.

“You shouldn’t tell people that,” Kendall shoots back.

They are both glad for Connor’s interruption.

“Hey, hey! It's the traitor son," he says sarcastically. Roman snickers and Kendall grimaces. "Kenny, I got Sophie a few books I think she’d like to read. Counteract some of that propaganda they’re teaching her at Chapin.”

“Uh-huh. Okay, thanks Con,” Kendall says, letting it go. Roman jumps in.

“Do you think, maybe, you’re seen as susceptible to conspiracies because people see a weirdo living in the desert-“

“Oh, Romey, I love when you express your love for me,” Connor ruffles Roman’s hair and Roman makes a face as Connor walks away. Kendall stares over at Shiv and Tom, now joined by Greg.

“So… Greg talked to me at the wedding,” he starts slowly to gauge Roman’s reaction. He takes a deep breath. “I think he’s got something on Waystar.”

“What? For real? Like what?”

“I dunno- something with cruises. Maybe wolf pack stuff?”

A pained look crosses Roman’s face and he smooths his button-down under his coat.

“He doesn’t know shit.”

“I- I think he does, actually. He might have paperwork. I’m just saying, keep an eye on him, okay?” Kendall suggests.

“Blech. I don’t want to look at him. But fine.” Roman and Kendall both pause to watch Greg from afar.

“Uh, hey, can we be real for a second? Like, just sibs for a sec?” Kendall starts.

“That’s gonna be a no, but you’re going to say whatever overthought nonsense you have anyway.”

“Would you work at Waystar if not for Dad?” Kendall asks.

“Actually, I’d be the most highly-paid gigolo in the country and would laugh at your paltry c-suite millions. Or, like, your mailroom paychecks, which is much more accurately where you’d be without Dad.”

Kendall sighs.

“So, no,” Kendall prompts.

“No. What? I don’t know. Maybe. Who gives a shit? Who’s asking?”

“Me, dude. Relax. It’s not a trick.”

“So, what, you would work here without Dad?” Roman asks defensively.

“Honestly, yeah,” Kendall answers. “I think I’m good at it.”

“I think that’s up for debate.“

“Well, it’s not.” Kendall wishes he could ask Roman if Logan has ever mentioned his abilities, but he knows it would result in mockery instead of actual information. He drops the subject, but he knows Roman gets what it’s like to want Dad’s love and respect- Roman is even willing to spend his time doing a job he doesn’t care about in order to try to gain it- and that knowledge lightens the weight on his shoulders a bit.

…….

Kendall’s phone beeps and interrupts his call with Stewy. He checks and it’s Roman’s name.

“The fucking- informant is calling again,” he almost chuckles.

“Be careful, Ken,” Stewy warns before ending the call.

Kendall switches to the new call and hears that Roman’s voice is hushed and tense.

“Ken, Dad is deciding what to do about Vaulter right now.” He nervously paces around the hallway by the waiting area outside Logan’s office.

“What- what do you mean, like he might kill it?”

“He’s torturing me with questions about you and Sandy and Stewy.”

“Okay. Well, I’m sorry to hear that, but no one made you go back to him… what- what about Vaulter?”

“He doesn’t fucking like it but he could save it?” He brushes his hand along the back of the leather couch and then waves his arm around with his next sentence. “I don’t fucking know, you’re the one who threw all our pretty, pretty money at something for Dad’s approval-“

“Vaulter was a solid business decision. And you don’t care about Dad’s approval? Secretly calling me. Taking his shit. Okay.” He decides saving Vaulter is more important than making his point and refocuses. “Well, look, I think Dad is wrong, and Vaulter deserves a chance. I mean, yeah, Lawrence probably inflated their numbers, so, hire some accounting consultants, send them over, show your face. Be the hero.” He hates the idea of Roman looking like the savior for his company, but he hates the idea of losing it more.

“Or I could lay off two hundred people and triumphantly march back to my ivory tower. Maybe I could hire them to build me a new ivory tower. What’s minimum wage now, like 600K?”

“Or you should listen to me because I know the full situation and actually want to build something there.”

“Riiiight, you’re so selfless and altruistic. So inspiring,” Roman says. “Seriously, 600K, can you imagine trying to live on that?” Kendall ignores him.

“Dude. This is for you, too. When you’re COO, you’ll be glad you have their content and their interface, their readers. Trust me on this.” Roman asked what to do, but he doesn’t always like getting what he wants. “So- does he want you to go in? See Lawrence?”

“Of course he does. Tomorrow at 11:00.”

“Are you-? Don’t make me look like an asshole, man. You can save this.” Kendall squirms at the thought of Roman in his territory, making disgusting jokes and talking shit about him.

“Don’t worry about me meeting with him, I’m much more charming and likable than you,” Roman says drily. Kendall rolls his eyes and wonders why Lawrence doesn’t like him.  “Okay, back to being the only son Daddy loves!”

Roman hangs up and Kendall drums his fingers on the arm of the chair and gets up to find Rava.

“Hey,” he calls into the great room. “I think Dad might be doing something insane. He wants to shut down Vaulter, our only chance into the twenty-first century… eighteen years late, but, you know, it’s Dad.”

“Can you save it?” she asks as he enters the room and sits down.

“Uh, well. I don’t know. He’s got Roman on it tomorrow. He wouldn’t tell me if he’s going to destroy it. I worked on that acquisition for months!” He throws his hand up exasperatedly.

“Well, don’t just let him take it down then. Go with him and stop him!”

“Dad would never allow that, so-“

“You know, you don’t have to worry about what your dad would allow anymore.” He thinks for a second. “It’s going to be your company, isn’t it? Are you going to let the current CEO shutter a valuable asset that you’ll need when you take over? Would you let that happen with any other acquisition?”

He gives her a little smile.

“I missed this,” he says. “You’re always right.”

He goes to sit next to her and leans in to kiss her. Her hand brushes the back of his head and he puts his forehead on hers for a second, reconnecting after the energy given to everything else.

“How’s your day going?” he asks. “Has work improved much?”

She slumps into the couch and leans against him.

“Not really,” she answers drearily. “It’s all so shrouded in darkness. I can’t believe there are companies that operate like this.” She shakes her head. “I don’t know how you work in this world.”

He tries not to take the comment personally.

“Well… Waystar doesn’t do shit like steal wages and kidnapping or whatever.”

She raises her eyebrows and his voice gets a defensive tone.

“Not now. Not while I’ve worked there, Rav, you know that.”

“Yeah. I’m-“ she sighs. “Sorry- I don’t know. I feel bad failing at this. If this guy never comes home, it’s because I couldn’t find him. If there’s no justice for all these workers… I guess I just wish I were a better lawyer.”

Kendall never hears her express doubt in herself. It takes him a second to process and respond.

“Hey, that’s not fair to you. You’re going to figure this out. I’ll try whatever I can to help. And-“ he hesitates. “Would it be so bad to ask Robert?”

“Oh, so you don’t have to call your dad when you have a business problem, but I have to call my step-dad?” she gently mocks.

“Okay. I mean, sure, obviously I get it, but he probably knows someone.”

“From his Wall Street acquisition world? They wouldn’t know about this.”

“I dunno, maybe he knows someone who does.”

She shrugs.

“I’ll think about it.”

……

Lawrence looks worriedly at Kendall.

“It’s all for real, man,” Lawrence asserts. “You made a good decision buying us, I mean, from your perspective. I’ll do what it takes to keep it going.” He pauses. “What do you honestly think is going to happen here?”

“I’m of the opinion Dad can be persuaded he’s making a mistake,” Kendall says intensely. Roman looks at him warily. He’s not sure what the right answer is and Kendall can tell. “But you gotta work with me. Okay? Trust me.”

Lawrence nods like he knows it’s not up to him and Kendall walks up toward the front of balcony area of the Vaulter floor, overlooking all the people below, and begins his speech. Roman stands behind Kendall and zones out his words while he observes the expressions on all the workers’ faces. They’re not loving it but they also have no choice.

“Vaulter is the future of this company,” Kendall’s saying. Roman glances at Lawrence and he catches him. Roman gives an awkward nod and lets out a silent sigh. Kendall’s eyes flit to Roman for some support in the cold room. Roman makes a subtle face at him and Kendall gets back on track.

“If I fuck this up, I’m done forever,” he announces to the crowd. Roman fights the urge to cheer and get a laugh. He wonders how Kendall can possibly be so sincere saying such a dramatic sentence. Vaulter’s not the only game in town, Roman thinks. Another one would come along. Kendall’s winding it down now.

“Tough times. All pull together. Trust. Trust me. Any questions?” Roman can practically hear the crickets. Kendall steps down from the chair, a little shaken at the negative reception. Low chatter resumes in the room and Roman gives Kendall a sardonic smirk.

“Wow, they fucking love you here, you were definitely the right choice to make that speech. Then again, I’m still cool and they all hate you more than ever, so-“

“I’m saving their fucking jobs,” Kendall mutters. Roman giggles and walks away. Even if it’s the right thing, he doesn’t want to make it easy. “You understand that’s what this is, right?” Kendall calls after his brother. “I’m serious.” He catches up to Roman. “You want to strategize tonight? We have a lot of work to do. Obviously you’ll have to send me some shit so I can do it from home since I can’t be here normally. But-“

“I’m actually having a dinner party tonight that you’re not invited to, so-“

“What?”

Roman looks annoyingly satisfied at Kendall’s confusion.

“Yeah, Tabs and I are having Shiv and Tom to dinner.” Kendall feels a flash of envy and disappointment not to be included with Rava in a couples’ dinner party for his siblings.

“Uh, okay.” He tries to justify. “Well, you- you can’t be seen with me anyway, so.”

“You know Dad’s going to know you came here today and that we were seen together.” The justification dissolves and Kendall shrugs it off and tries to put a teflon wall around himself, allowing his eyes to get a little darker.

“Tell him I went rogue.”

……

Kendall squishes into his favorite armchair in the family room, glancing at the fireplace while he idly listens to Stewy complain over the phone.

“When were you going to consult with me on making a speech to all of Vaulter, Ken?” he asks, clearly annoyed. “How does that look? How am I supposed to explain this?”

“It’s going to look like I’m taking over this company and care what happens to it. It makes sense.”

“You standing with Roman the ‘loyal son’ and speaking from a joint perspective. That makes sense?”

“Yes. It does. I can’t trust Roman to take care of things. Dad leans toward killing it. If Roman feels the heat, he’ll fold. He’d fire them all tomorrow if he thought it would get him a pat on the head.”

Stewy sighs.

“This isn’t your favorite kind of, like, nice, pleasant acquisition where you have lunch and discuss your joint business dreams.” Stewy tries to sound authoritative but he smiles a little at the vast difference in how he and Kendall do business. “Not to sound like your dad,” he shudders, “but this is war. It cannot look like you might still be talking to him or your brother. No more of this.”

“You know we need Vaulter, Stew.”

“Figure it out without being buddy-buddy with the fucking enemy. I don’t want to be destroyed on CNBC tomorrow and I’m sick of being questioned by Sandy. You still need him, don’t forget that.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Bye.”

Kendall goes back to looking over the piles of Vaulter documents in front of him and slips on his glasses. He only wears them when it’s absolutely necessary, but Rava loves when she catches a glimpse. She steps into the doorway, head tilted and subtle smile on her face as she watches him focus. He looks up and takes the glasses off.

“Hi,” he says.

“Oh, you’re so cute in those, put them back on,” she says as she walks closer.

“No.”

“Well, you never know when you're cute.” He looks down and tries not to smile. “See, right now.” She steps between his chair and the desk, leaning back against it as she surveys him, and puts the glasses back on him. “Sexy econ professor," she laughs. "Tell me about the stock market.”

He laughs and shakes his head. She tucks her hair behind her ears and leans over him.

“How’s the New York Stock Exchange?” she whispers.

He looks down her open blouse.

“Uh, pretty hot. I'm the professor? Okay. I'll teach you. Waystar is actually doing better than I-”

“Ooh, I heard those Waystar guys are rich,” she purrs in his ear. He takes off the glasses again and puts them down.

“You heard right,” he says, completely straight-faced this time as he pulls her into his lap for a sexy kiss. “All the diamonds you want if you come to office hours.”

“And if I want time?” She smiles into his lips and swats in the direction of his laptop. He reaches over and closes it.

“Probably more than you want,” he chuckles.

“Good. Well, Mom and Robert are expecting us at 7:00, so… we should go in a few minutes. So much better than a stupid dinner party with your siblings all night,” she says in a light tone as she stands up, knowing the party is bothering him enough that he insisted they go to her parents’ house this very weekend. He nods, wondering again why Roman and Shiv don’t hang out with him more. He remembers Roman essentially saying he liked being close to him a few days ago and feels guilty for letting him dangle in that conversation while he was mad. He wonders if that’s the real reason he wasn’t invited.

“Yeah. Let me just-“

“Don’t make me explain to him why we’re late, come onnnn.” She pulls him up playfully and he extricates himself before putting his hands on her upper arms and looking into her eyes.

“I will be done in ten minutes,” he promises.

“Ha! Sure you will. Just remember this trip was your idea, so if we’re late, you are dealing with any and all fallout.”

“Okay. I could be almost done by now. I’ll be out in-“

“Ten minutes,” they say in unison. Rava smiles and walks out.

……..

When the heavy wooden door of the elegant stone Greenwich home swings open, Kendall is immediately enveloped in Rava’s mom’s arms, squished in with Rava and the kids behind them and feeling the stress being squeezed away. Years of memories flood back in in the best way, of his first happy Christmas with Rava’s family at age 23, the time a year later when Rava had run into the house ahead of him squealing to her mom about her new engagement ring, the first time they brought both kids to visit and swelled with pride. This house has been a sweet escape for Kendall his whole adult life. Every time Logan had hurt his pride or his self-esteem, he had found himself again with the other side of his family. He closes his eyes for a few moments, taking in the kindness and calm of the house he had missed for the last three years.

When Cheryl finally lets go, she puts her hand on Kendall’s face.

“Look at you. You’re still thirty. Men have it so easy,” she laughs with Rava and he shakes his head. She grabs him again and pats his back. “Ohhh, I missed you.” She looks at her daughter and grandchildren. “He’s such a good hugger. I almost forgot how cute he is.” Rava and Kendall smile.

“It’s true,” Rava agrees.

“Okay,” he laughs at the way he'd forgotten they compliment him like he isn't there. “Thank you, I missed you, too. I’m so glad to be back. Seriously, you have no idea.” Cheryl pats his hand and turns her attention to Sophie and Iverson.

“My babies! You’re getting so big,” she coos.

“Grandma!” Sophie excitedly jumps up and down and Iverson smiles.

“Come eat!” Cheryl beckons to the dining room and takes the kids’ hands as she leads them to the kitchen. Kendall and Rava head in to find Rava’s stepdad setting his glass at his place. Robert seems even taller than he usually does in his own home, authority and confidence emanating from him in a similar yet less menacing way as Logan.

“Sweetheart,” he says to Rava, coming over to kiss her cheek. “Good you’re here for the weekend.” He turns to Kendall. “Ken, son!” he booms. “Get over here.” Kendall's glad to hear that he's still considered family but his heart beats a little faster as he walks over for what feels like a bit of a test. “I hear you’ve got it all together these days,” Robert says, glancing down his nose as he commends and warns at once.

“That’s right,” Kendall affirms, a little tension creeping up as he worries he hasn’t been accepted back in. “Here to stay,” he adds, trying to sound confident. Robert lingers in eye contact for exactly two seconds before moving on.

“That’s what we like to hear!” He claps him on the back and Kendall breathes a sigh of relief. “Now let’s hear every detail of this fucking bear hug. It’s daring. I like that. Cheryl, do we have something besides scotch and wine in this house?”

“Oh, it’s fine-“ Kendall starts.

“Well, of course we do,” Cheryl rolls her eyes as she glides back in, already ready with Perrier and French grapefruit soda. The kids trail her and sit down at their places. She musses Robert’s hair as she passes him and sets the bottles in the middle of the table. “Divina made the most incredible cedar plank salmon for tonight, it’ll blow your mind.”

“It smells great,” Rava says.

“And mac ’n’ cheese for my adorable grandchildren,” she continues. The kids dig in as soon as the cook places the food on the table.

“So! Let’s hear it. Taking on the titan, huh?” Robert asks.

“Uh, yeah, well- it- it obviously was not my ideal plan, but it’s pretty much necessary. My dad-“ he sighs. “It’s just- time for the new generation to take over.”

“True enough, some of us know when to retire! Someone’s got to keep the golf clubs in business. Now for the good stuff- Vaulter!” Kendall knew the M&A lawyer would want all the juicy details about the acquisition.

“My dad wants it gone- I hear,” Kendall starts. “I guess he wants to sell but, you know, if things go right, he won’t be in charge for much longer, so I’m planning to save it. It’s hard from the outside, but I won’t be outside for long.”

“You gave a speech I hear,” Robert smirks.

“That got out, huh?” Kendall asks a little nervously. “Well, I did, yeah. They need to know where we stand. Can’t have them unionizing, it’s for their own good. Dad would shut that down so fast. But we’re gonna have an amazing company culture, like, they’re going to be bragging to their friends about how incredible things are for them. They think they have it good now with a few ping-pong tables. Just wait til I have a chance to do things right. The guys on twelve in our building are pumped about all the changes I made happen. Even the breakfast food. They actually specifically told me so.”

Rava smiles to herself. She likes when the passion spills out of the buttoned-up persona he keeps up.

“Mmhmm. I do see you at the helm,” Robert looks him over and nods approvingly. Rava knows what it means for Kendall to hear that.

“Thank you." He looks genuinely touched and Rava wonders if he's heard that at all since the position was offered to him a year and a half ago.

“Rava!” Robert calls. “Let’s hear some good case news.” Kendall glances at her uneasily.

“You probably should have done me first,” she says jokingly while still accidentally managing to come off as preemptively defensive toward him. “Well,” she begins, “the case I’m still working on is- a unique challenge. Some international corporate stuff. But it’s going all right,” she fibs.

“Nothing you can’t figure out if you put real effort in,” he says. She wonders if she’s being too sensitive or if the implication that she isn’t trying was really there. “What’s wrong with it?” he asks. She gives him a look like he should know better than to ask for case details and he rolls his eyes. “I’ll sign whatever you need, just spill it,” he orders. Kendall watches her dissolve a little as she glances down at the table and gives in and he grimaces for a moment. It doesn’t occur to him that this is what she’s watched happen to him all their lives.

“Um, well, the resorts don’t keep very clear paperwork- I’m sure that’s not an accident- and they make it pretty difficult to get it. I need evidence of settlements for past wage theft whisteblowers to prove this is a pattern of behavior.” She blinks and avoids Robert’s eyes. “But they operate out of these remote island places and it’s been hard to get in touch with anyone in management to get the evidence I need…?” She hates that she probably sounds like she’s not working hard enough. “And I’ve subpoenaed but, obviously, that doesn’t work if everyone’s MIA.” She takes a long sip of her chardonnay, dreading the response.

“Well, if you can’t figure it out yourself, you should grab that Gerri Kellman for a consult,” Robert asserts. Rava’s shoulders tense up. “If Waystar’s still running, it’s because she’s kept ‘em all out of prison,” he laughs. “No offense, Ken.”

“Uh…” Kendall starts. “Well, I, you know, to a point, I agree,” he says, hoping to keep things smooth and take the unwanted attention off of Rava and the case. “There have been some problems with some bad actors within the company. I’m going to affect a lot of change in the culture when I’m CEO. The culture that my dad has allowed is actually toxic. And I’m coming to change that.” He looks at Rava. “But, Rava wouldn’t talk to Gerri while we’re in the middle of this- that would be a disaster.” He looks back at Robert and she feels queasy. “But I’m sure between the two of us, we could get a list of some fuckin’ superstars she could talk to, yeah?”

“You said a bad word!” Sophie cries, looking up from her dinner.

“Oh, sh- uh, yeah. Sorry, Soph.” Sophie goes back to eating and not paying attention.

Normally Rava would laugh at Sophie’s occasional tendency to chastise her dad about little things, but this time, she’s caught on something else. She’d almost forgotten that she’d called Gerri at all in all the chaos of the last few days and hadn’t gotten around to mentioning the conversation to Kendall. Now she thinks she’d better not.

“Mmhmm,” Robert responds. “I’ll get a list going of people you can consult with.”

“I mean, it’s going fine, but- sure.” Rava nods with a tight smile to her stepdad. “Thank you,” she adds. She doesn’t mind when Kendall offers to help because she knows how happy it makes him to feel useful and needed. But when Robert helps, she worries that it comes from doubt rather than encouragement. But either way, in this particular situation, she knows she needs it.

Later that evening, Kendall comes back into their guest bedroom from brushing his teeth and enjoys the low golden light coming from one of the Tiffany lamps on the nightstand by Rava. She watches him and thinks he looks physically lighter on his feet after the compliments and encouragement he got tonight. She feels a bit flattened herself. She slides her hands over her face and makes a mental note to say extra nice things to the kids tomorrow. Being criticized really messes people up, she thinks, considering Kendall’s and her different but related experiences. He sits down on the side of the bed and drops his button-up off his shoulders. Rava reaches up from her position lying in bed and traces her fingers from one freckle to the next on his back. She wants to be close.

“I love these,” she says. They’re peacefully quiet for a moment as she continues. “You’re getting them checked every year though, right?”

He chuckles.

“Yes. You’re so my wife.” She smiles and keeps gently rubbing her fingers over his back as he closes his eyes.

“That feels so nice.” He drops his head back and leans back into her touch.

“Don’t put anything else on,” she whispers.

He nods before turning to lie down right next to her and pull her close into a tight hug. He feels solid, warm, safe. She tucks her head into the crook of his neck and relaxes, relishing how soft his skin is there.

“Mmm, you are a good hugger,” she whispers. “I love you.”

“I love you,” he smiles. “I’m so glad we’re here.” He slides his hands up the back of her t-shirt.

“Feel better?” she asks.

“I’m about to,” he mumbles into her skin as he rolls her on top of him.

“We’ll have to be quiet,” she says mischievously.

He gives her a cocky smile.

“Yeah? Good luck with that.”

Chapter 13 💗

[starkjoy]

Watching Greg be so good at swooping in and looking ridiculous to make tom look good this ep, and how their double act is Tom then shitting on him to make himself look better, I had a cool thought, what if that’s what we are seeing all the time. We have only seen Tom and Greg in public situations, where they obviously plan out their moves beforehand and aren’t afraid to look stupid to get what they want. We don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors with them right now, and with Tom being so handsy, it could be more than anyone around them realises… If you watch their walk up to the plane, Greg launches into a ladykiller act, but when Tom cuts him off he actually had just said ‘get some Norwegian wood’ while looking at Tom, idk about you but that’s a dick joke imo lol. Tom wouldn’t want anyone to catch onto how close he and Greg are if it means a lot, and their play may be for Greg to talk about girls/dance with girls/bring girls back to keep people off the scent. I would love if the audience finds out the same time as the sibs, or has to guess from little moments that don’t add up you know? Maybe we don’t get to see the whole story because that’s private? Idk it would be kind of a cool way to do it and feel true to life where people don’t necessarily broadcast their relationship in public and you just kind of realise one day, oh they’re totally together, and by then their like basically married. As a viewer I feel like that would actually be a really comfy and less intrusive way to see queer rep, your just like oh I’m glad they have each other, phew haha.

hmm, in theory i'd be happy with that, but i'm skeptical the writers are playing 4D chess in that way. if the episode one bridget randomfuck plotline never happened, i'd be a bit more open to the thought. when greg was chatting with tom in "private" at the event, he was crude about his pursuit of her and tried to impress him with the rummaging tale...why would he do that to someone he's sleeping with or in a relationship with? and he only told logan after tom fucked with him about it. unless they coordinated a whole homoerotic private performance in the hopes someone would overhear their horny whispers, i doubt that plot was fabricated to hide their affair.

i mean, they could be sleeping together and not exclusive, and greg did that to make tom jealous, or they get off on telling each other about their other conquests. but that feels so wildly out of character for tom given he never wanted an open relationship with shiv.

sadly, i think "they were fucking all along" will only live in fanon. the ONLY thing i think could work is a) they had a threesome during their disgusting brothers era, it was weird and changed their dynamic and they're avoiding it by being super bro no homo, even if they do long for each other or b) they fucked 1:1 with the same result. i could see that being revealed in a fight between them, explaining some of the tension or lack thereof we've seen so far. but still think that's pretty far-fetched at this rate :/

edit: i DO want to add that i fully agree tomgreg have been in cahoots and we haven't been privy to that—but i don't see that extending beyond their business scheming. not clear whether we'll see their inner machinations either. maybe it's all been left on the cutting room floor.

[sunflowerdigs]

S4 spec (spoilery and long)

If there's a board meeting in the finale, I suspect it'll function a lot like the yacht meetings in 2x10, only instead of Logan deciding unilaterally who is going to take the fall for company malfeasance, the board is going to decide. And they're going to decide who gets to be CEO, now that Logan is either dead (very possibly the 4x09 funeral is his), in jail himself, or forced to recuse himself from all company business pending a trial or investigation.

I suspect there will be some election fraud issues around Mencken for which ATN will be blamed. And I think that Ewan and his lawyer will somehow bring back cruises in 4x08 or 4x09. Stewy is still on the board, as is Shiv, and they both have Sandy/Sandi's ear. Also, I suspect that, early on (4x02 - 4x03?) in order to reward Tom, Logan will push Cyd out (like he did Frank) and give her job to Tom; Tom will then give his old job to Greg. Hilariously, if Roman sticks around as a kind of liaison to Mencken, this would put him underneath both Tom and Greg.

Anyway, I think that Shiv and Stewy will team up and use their influence to push Sandy/Sandi to vote for either Tom or Kendall but I'm not sure which one. On Kendall's side, obviously, Shiv will be reeling from whatever happens to Logan. She'll likely still be on the outs with Tom. And Succession may want to reverse her loyalty from S2. Stewy is Kendall's friend and if Kendall has demonstrated capability in S3, he'll likely want to save him, even if Kendall has told him about the waiter. Stewy doesn't know Tom, but he knows the Roy's have always viewed him as disposable and of little use or influence.

Anyway, based on S2, i think it could either go one of two ways. Because it came down to Kendall vs Tom in S2, I think that's how it will go this time, only the stakes will obviously be higher. One of them will get CEO and one will get fired/sent to jail/publicly run out of town on a rail. Because the scandals are so big, Logan being gone won't be enough, WR will also need to have the appearance of cleaning house by firing someone high up.

Additionally, Matsson is a factor. I could see the board being angry if Logan attempts to fuck the deal with him (which he inevitably will) because the terms are good for WR and its shareholders. They might even sue Logan (in a situation like the one Kendall threatened Lawrence with in 1x01, giving him an offer so good he can't not take it). Kendall brought Matsson in in the first place, and that might outweigh his participation in the little sibling rebellion. Plus, the Succession writers may want to put Kendall in the position of finally getting what he wants, only his father isn't there to give it to him and it's only a fraction of what he initially would have had. Finally, I suspect that in the first half of s4, Tom's personal life with Shiv will fall apart as he gains more power at WR. That means that in the second half, he's likely to lose power at WR while his relationship with Shiv strengthens. If these factors rule out, Kendall gets CEO and Tom is fired (along with some Greg sprinkles, probably).

Alternatively, Shiv and Tom could have reconciled somewhat by the end of s4, especially if Shiv loses someone close to her and/or is pregnant. Succession may choose to make her s4 decision parallel her S2 decision rather than cross it. Additionally, Stewy's position has always been 'protect my investment'. If Kendall tells him about the waiter, Stewy may look into the future and see Cruise part 2: electric boogaloo if he allows Kendall to become CEO. Plus, as much as Stewy always wants to give Kendall a chance, he has also always been (smartly) wary of Kendall's ability to actually lead. His first suggestion to him at the start of the series was to get out of WR because it's not really for him. Finally, Tom has done a good job at ATN and likely will continue to do so as head of the network. A competent person who is technically connected to the Roy's by marriage but is NOT a Roy himself may look like a good option to a board that wants to clean house but also wants to keep the ship sailing.

(Of course, if ATN is involved in some kind of election fraud, these factors might actually work against Tom (in the same way that I suspect being interim CEO during the Cruises scandal might affect Gerri at season's start - Matsson might want to get rid of her).

Anyway, if these factors rule out, Tom becomes CEO (with Greg sprinkles), Kendall is officially let go, and except for Shiv's board seat, the Roy's effectively lose control of WR.

[oakwookandink]

white lotus s2 finale rundown 

(spoilers ahead)

in case you're wondering, here are the characters that survived the second season: Daphne and Cameron (the supposed scammers, played by Meghann Fahy and Theo James) Harper and Ethan Spiller (the couple on the rocks, played by Aubrey Plaza and Will Sharpe) Albie, Dominic and Bert Di Grasso (all of the men who were on some sort of heritage trip, played by Adam DiMarco, Michael Imperioli and F. Murray Abraham) Portia (Tanya's assistant, who gets whisked away to Sicily, played by Haley Lu Richardson) Jack (the supposed nephew of the head gay, played by Leo Woodall) Valentina, and the rest of the hotel staff (she's the director of this location, who is played by Sabrina Impacciatore) Lucia and Mia, my problematic faves (both of whom use their bodies to get what they want, and the only non guests involved, played by Simona Tabasco and Beatrice Grannó) presumably Greg, Tanya's husband who we met last season in Hawai'i (played by Jon Gries) although we don't have any confirmation of this fact

that means the dead characters are: Tanya McQuoid, Quentin, Didier and Niccoló (played by Jennifer Coolidge, Tom Hollander, Bruno Gouery [from Emily in Paris] and Stefano Gianino), putting the death toll at 4. it is not told whether or not Hugo or the captain of the boat survived, but I would personally doubt it, because they did seem significantly far out from the shore. in the end, I'm sure only mike white knows for sure.

now, let's talk about that season finale.

first off, I'm wondering if greg actually was planning something, or if tanya blew it out of proportion in some way. I guess we'll never know, although there were definitely some red flags, especially with the way that jack was acting.

let's talk about jack for a second. I'm so happy that he redeemed himself in my eyes, and let portia go and even gave her advice that probably saved her life. who knows what might've happened if portia went back to the hotel? I'm a jack fan at the end of this season, because the guy was just doing what he could with the cards he was dealt, but didn't want to actively hurt someone (because if tanya had gotten hurt, he would've been peripherally involved, but wouldn't have played a direct part in her demise)

the digrassos. I feel like they could've used some comeuppance, apart from albie. it sucks that dominic will probably just go back to what he's been doing, and that albie vouched for his dad. I feel like the fact that none of these men have been affected by their experiences is shown in the airport scene, where a young woman walks by and they all turn their heads to ogle her. I think it shows that this gross misogyny kind of runs in their family (because they kind of perpetuate it) and that it would be hard for them to change without serious introspection.

super happy for valentina. did mia use her? sure. but it was definitely mutually beneficial, and mia does say that she wants to help valentina find a lesbian, and even take her out to bars, so I foresee a prosperous future for valentina. also gotta say, small win for the gays because valentina wasn't killed at the end of this season.

isabella and rocco seem fine. I'm happy that Isabella was always so polite to valentina, and I think she genuinely wanted to be friends with her, so a good future for these two and hopefully they have a good life.

ethan nearly chokes cameron, and I am so unhappy that cameron lives at the end of the season. I think it would be cool to have a cameo from daphne next season, where she is ending her stay at a white lotus with her trainer and her sons, and we just assume that she killed cameron or something. I am happy for ethan and harper, but it seems like a bandaid on their situation, so I'm not sure what the future looks like for these couples. I do think their stories could have been wrapped up better, and I wonder if mike white found himself burdened by the inclusion of so many characters this season, because the ending did not seem as closed as season one.

lucia and mia are doing well, lucia has loads of money that she got after scamming albie, and mia has a job at the white lotus as a singer, so good for them. I could care less about albie, and as he says, that amount is a drop in the bucket for his father anyway. I also think it is legitimate karmic payment, that dominic will inadvertently help the lives of these two women after destroying the lives of the women in his family. I'm also happy that lucia and mia live, because I think there is a trend in media where promiscuous women are killed because of their promiscuity, so seeing them live was super endearing. especially since lucia says earlier in the season that she's worried that she will die because she's a prostitute, and prostitutes always die.

I'm kind of happy for portia, but I can't help but compare her to belinda. it feels kind of significant that one of these characters was a guest and the other an employee, and that one was white and the other was black, in terms of where they ended up. I do think the show could've paralleled their arcs better in this finale, and driven home the point that portia was coming from a point of privilege, and that's why she survived and got off relatively easy.

what was the point of including the story of the woman from the moors? who was that supposed to represent after the finale? my guess was tanya, but I don't think we'll get a follow up on her storyline, so the symbolism here doesn't really work. also, if it was tanya, the story is backwards, because she dies and the cheating spouse doesn't. is the point of the statues that this was the path one of the main couples was heading down, and then the statue breaking is a subversion, and their story won't end in tragedy? honestly, I have no idea.

I'm happy that tanya died. I was getting tired of her character, and I was scared that if she survived this season mike white would bring her back for season three, and I think the series will work better without through lines or continuing stories, and instead focuses on the only point of contact being the white lotus resorts.

I'm happy that the piano guy is gone. he wasn't that interesting, and I'm happy for mia.

greg, will we ever see him again? will we get a conclusion to his story?

it's really ironic that tanya ends up killing herself, because if greg was after her money, he's got it now. I would like to see greg get comeuppance, because I think he sucks.

just like greg, I feel like cameron didn't get his comeuppance, but I guess we might have to wait for another season to see if anything bad comes to him.

I feel kind of bad for the group of gays, but I also don't. I have mixed feelings about their group, and my thoughts about their ending are still developing. I do think that it's possible tanya overreacted and killed a bunch of people who didn't have completely nefarious intentions. this is another storyline that could've used a defter hand, because it feels incomplete.

I do think that it's weird that there is a kind of bury your gays going on with the show, considering that armond is the only death in season one (and we're shown that he's gay) and then we have two of the gays dying in this season. I doubt these are white's intentions, but it is kind of weird to look at this together, and I think the next season will cement the trends of the show.

final thoughts:

I would rate this season maybe a 6 or 6.5 out of 10. it was not as good as the first, however it was possibly more entertaining than the first. I think involving so many characters made it harder to have satisfying story beats for all of them, and loads of people online have pointed out that there is not a lot of interaction between the guests, or even that a lot of important plot points aren't taking place at the hotel. the first season seemed a lot more focused in its scope. I do believe that the show was intended to be a limited series, and I think it should have stayed that way, because I think it will only get worse as it goes on, when it could've ended on a high note last season. I'm down to watch the third season and see if mike white can redeem himself, and because there are a lot of technical aspects of the show that I enjoy, but I'm not eagerly anticipating it like I am other good shows like succession.

I do hope that mike white finds a way to tie up all of the loose ends of this season somehow, but I think all of the loose ends and dropped story beats really cheapened this season. it also makes me think that season one was lightning in a bottle that he will never be able to replicate.

anyway, a pretty disappointing follow up.

[gregoftom]

I don’t Greg hates Shiv at all to be honest. I think he likes Ken and Con and has neutral feelings toward Roman and Shiv. The latter two are pretty rude to him but he still tries to engage with them. They’re just cousins

well when we look at "like" in the context of the show it's really important because as shiv said "i love you but i cannot fucking stomach you" and i think that's a sentiment which applies to Most of the relationships in the show. wrt ken there are multiple factors regarding how greg feels towards him like. the reason he goes to ken so much is because ken is the only one of them who showed him any decency like, con did as well but con is not really considered a major player. he likes con well enough i agree but when it comes to ken it's much more complicated than he likes him, tbh. but he's the one he comes to most bc ken is the only one who gives him any kind of day lol [when he feels like it.] and i mean he was pretty fucking peeved when ken gaslit him and fucked him around about burning him and called him a parasite lol. that hurt. i think greg wants to like ken, but actually likes him? i dunno.

it seems like by s4 greg doesn't really like roman and why would he, rome has never done him any favours lol, he treats him like garbage just like pretty much everybody. they rebuff his advancements. and mostly he wants to talk to him as a part of the group of siblings because of information OR to try and connect with them because that's the thing about greg, he wants desperately to like his family and for them to like him, but the tragedy is that is just not the case. they treat him like shit and then expect him to do things for him like. why would he like any of them tbh. it's more of a sort of desperation to be part of the group, to be included, to be a member of a family, to have connection. tom can see this in him and that's why he uses the word family to coax him, because he knows it works. the difference is tom actually did look after and help greg as much as he could whereas the others told him to get fucked OR in ken's case, helped him when it suited them and then forgot about it or fucked him over later.

i think the only person greg actually likes is tom. he wants to like his grandpa as well but he cannot stomach him and like that is completely understandable bc ewan is a shitty old bitch. he loves his grandfather, he can't help it, but he doesn't like him. who would lmfao. like... the thing is it even comes to like, human feeling as well. who would you end up actually liking, someone who yeah okay treated you kind of shitty and pushed you around and had a lot of anger and took it out on you but took care of you when you were all alone in the bigwig world for the first fucking time, dropped in the middle of all this shit, self sacrificed twice just because you ask when you know the others would do jack shit for you even if you begged on your knees, or people who don't give a fuck about you unless it suits them and then turn around and tell you to get fucked? it's kinda psychology as well.

aaaand when it comes down to shiv, i don't think you would smash the bottle in the face of somebody you were even neutral towards, tbh lol. i know the show deadass had them just talking normally at the funeral but that's an issue i feel that's very prevalent in s4 like, there's no fallout because of time constraints i guess? or because they wanted to focus more solely on the siblings and the side charas got shunted to the side slightly. i also don't think you would say "you wanna strategise? you wanna fry her ass up?" about someone you were neutral towards, lmao. so i do think there's a bit of dislike towards shiv there specifically. he doesn't like her being mean to tom! and that like. makes sense? i think most of us would actively dislike somebody if they were hurting our best friend physically, mentally and emotionally. even if you look at it from a platonic pov [lol] greg is defensive of his closest [and only] friend.

[ebbarights]

with open eyes liveblog

i'm not ready for this. i haven't pre-grieved enough it turns out. i feel sick

on the bright side the only spoiler i have is that shiv did something controversial? which isn't a spoiler i would say but i'm actively avoiding reading the post currently greyed out behind this open tab

stewy not on kendall's side??? that's a fucking first. it's not but it is

okay so this is just like 1x06 right. literally a repeat?

last intro :(( i'm soo fucking sad. im sad. sadsaddsad oh yay arian. saaaaaaad

EBBA

shaved matsson cursed. hate that

matsson as shiv's puppet i don't think he's gonna like that. if their deal goes through i would be really surprised

theories about roman running to mommy literally right. love that though

tomshiv is making me want to rip myself in half like rumplestiltskin. specifically the shiv part obvs

i'm sure smart people have already made posts about this but. caroline called shiv.

NEW JESS NO

"let's bag him and tag him" dog (gone rogue) motif? idk anything about hunting

roman looking beat up in a normal t shirt wearing bracelets these are my dreams come true

caroline is so real. eyes ARE disgusting. face eggs

LAWRENCE YEE

kendall looks like a fucking disney villain driving up in his range rover in a suit sing-songing roman's name

SHIV TITS

okay tomgreg scene time to think about other things. everything revolving around roman is my dream finale <3 i want him to be okay but i also love it when he's not okay. you can't lose when you play both sides

shiv is way too sure of winning so she's for sure not winning huh

tom said grinder like- [i am shot in the head before i can continue]

fully flexing my swedish here

caroline is so right. get out you guys

wait sib alliance back on?? can this be real

i hate to say it but i think kendall's right he should be the one to take over

them talking about roman's breakdown while he's hugging himself is exactly what i wanted but it will make me want to kill myself forever

noo guys don't go in the waterrrrr don't you know about the motif

roman talking about sharks in the water is literally me but this time for real for real because i do have a debilitating shark phobia

if succession genuinely has a fucking. shark attack in it. (once again on my birthday) like that's legit fucking personal. jesse armstrong has read my diary and wants to ruin my life

i just googled 'succession shark' that's how paranoid i am lmaooo

kendall don't. DON'T go in the water

i know it's ridiculous i don't like the killing kendall conversation. this is the finale please don't play me with rn

okay the music is starting which means this scene is over and they can get out of the water right please get out get out right now

are they gonna actually accidentally kill kendall. or will it be on purpose and that was a double bluff

they are spending wayy too much time on this scene for a series finale that's already pretty long so. something's definitely gonna happen with the fucking smoothie. i feel sick

okay scene is over i feel like an idiot but relieved lol. maybe just a last happy siblings scene? if that's the case i'm glad we got that. i'm happy that scene was so long

wait shiv hasn't done anything controversial yet. is this like. a double bluff? i don't know how that would work i don't think that's the case

connor's peepaw slay

hope this isn't the only time gerri shows up but if it is i'm glad she's there at all

krank real

okay tom told shiv i know what's gonna happen and i think i'm okay with that kind of betrayal

i LOVE that greg's fucking parasite both sides shit finally came to bite him in the ass. if greg has a bad ending succession has a good ending

matsson screaming for ebba that's me.

yeah that's what i thought. i'm okay with that. like i wanted more for shiv and for the sibs but that was never gonna happen

living for the karoline hugo rivalry

STEWYYYY

okay stewy queer confirmed <3 like we all knew but still. also that line is gonna sustain the kenstewys for months

GERRIII and immediate zoom on roman lol

noo roman he seemed so weirdly okay until now. the pill scene is coming up huh

jesus i. i can't think of anything to say. poison

so my guess right now is. kendall is becoming logan but he also loses the vote. so he did That for nothing

it's literally 1x06. kendall sitting where logan sat, frank doing the notes

they're 4-4 and roman's next. 1x06 babyyyyyy

you could argue he made a different choice because he voted for kendall this time but. just like 1x06 he was pressured into that vote by a guy who uses physical violence against him. still with the parallels

they just said 6-6? did they count votes we didn't hear or am i an idiot

please don't threaten suicide right now ken. now's not the time

i think lying about the waiter is the worst thing kendall has ever done and that includes the scene with roman just before

i hate that roman said iverson and sophie aren't kendall's kid (real 'just playing devil's advocate' move) but i loooooove that he defended shiv <3

living for disillusioned roman. he might make kendall kill himself but he knows what's up

yeah i don't see an ending where kendall lives

tomgreg final breakup <3 i hope greg dies in a ditch

gerri's safe <333333

the romelukas ao3 potential though

good ending because ebba wins. can't believe i have the url of someone who won succession

roman drinking a martini :((((

roman drinking a martini :))))))

jesus christ kendall and colin

don't go near the water kendall. kendall listen to me.

okay think i'm gonna do a round-up post

[trophywifejimgordon]

ehhhhh tomgreg under the cut

state of tomgreg. ok. ok. tom has feelings for greg, and i think he pretty much understands them as unrequited. it’s like, greg is happier than him AND happier without him. and greg has seen (and sort of taken advantage of!) a shift in their relationship, too... tom tipped his hand, as it were, talking about nero and sporus, and now greg is kind of starting to realize where they stand. that he has influence over tom. that tom will even go against his own self-interest for him, if he flashes puppy eyes! and because he’s still just cousin greg, he doesn’t know quite what he’s supposed to do with that, doesn’t drive in the knife the way shiv, for instance, or any of her brothers might. but (!!) he’s always been a little bit of a schemer, and that’s lurking in the back of his mind, so where it was once that tom had greg as the one person in his circle whom he had power over, now the dynamic is shifting, and greg is starting to realize that tom is the one person in his circle that he has power over. and this comes at sort of a big time for greg, who is busy actualizing a worse version of himself, w/ ewan and greenpeace and shifting loyalties. meanwhile, tom is totally going to get divorced. and so.

right off from that episode (3x7), i think greg is confused. he had the massive (if happy) outburst of tom’s violence to remind him exactly what kind of weird, off-putting dude tom has been to him since day one, but right after, he gets a soft, genuine forehead kiss. (remember, this to the same greg who got a haircut he didn’t need just to have someone touch his head). his response to that is kind of all over the place. they’re at a fork in their dynamic; nero and sporus. greg refusing to cockfight in his office after to relieve the perceived tension, greg asking tom to eat his sins at the diner and tom refusing to play into greg’s quid-pro-quo. in a very real way, they’re in uncharted territory. free men, both from the looming threat of jail and, just a little bit, from the chains forged into their dynamic from the first episode. i’m not sure if greg 100% understands that tom is in love with him, but the kiss was, imo, enough for him to get some serious wires crossed. this leads naturally into both “prove it!” and the flirtations with comfry. greg has sort of a new interest, a new energy for tom, and yet, he’s also panicking and backpedaling, pursuing a girl with renewed vigor because she’s shown some interest in him that wasn’t tomlike and violent, and she’s pretty, and he’s totally straight. that’s a normal thing to do. not to mention the added appeal of it being forbidden by kendall, giving the affair the new dimension of taking the piss out of the roys, whom greg has been humiliated by...

so, who knows? there’s something and there’s nothing. greg’s intrigued (despite himself) and he’s ignoring it (unconsciously). tom wants what he can’t have and he doesn’t even know why he’s sad. repression wins the day. now what?

from where i’m sitting, i think everyone is waiting for the other shoe to drop. for tom to put a legitimate name to his feelings. until he outlines them in real words, greg can (and will) go on ignoring what’s right in front of his face, and tom can keep living this same lie that he’s been living with shiv. even this whole thing with comfry kind of feels like a prod, part of the dare: maybe greg wants tom to be angry about it. maybe he’s waiting, with dread shot through with shameful anticipation, for tom to ruin this for him, because he’s learned in the last year or so of his life the perils of trying to have anything good that’s all for him, especially when it directly excludes tom. tom’s flat out told him that he resents greg’s happiness, and here’s greg, waving it around like a banner, a taunt: oh, i hope no one tries to take this from me...

and he could! he could. early on in their relationship, tom definitely would. but, since this new turn in their dynamic is all about them subverting their old shit, i’m thinking: what if he doesn’t? what if he just never does?

greg, tired of waiting for that other shoe, finally confronts tom, i think. he’s a little pissed off despite himself--like, hasn’t tom noticed? what’s taking him so long? obviously he doesn’t want tom to ruin it, but he’s going to, so what’s the holdup? and tom... actually, i’d be kind of interested in a (completely hypocritical, natch) “reason you suck” speech. tom sort of tearing greg a new one about his integration into the roy family, about how once they were both outsides, and now it’s just tom. how greg and his plots and his legal action and that thing with the nazis and this new side of him going on dates is unrecognizable from the kid who showed up asking for a job. and yet--tom is in love with him. it’s a love confession. it’s a love confession that greg either rejects (in a fumbling, greggy way) or that tom rejects for him, but either way, it’s another raw breakup. somewhere around the same time, tom is served shiv’s divorce papers (or vice-versa), and that’s that. 

timeskip. a year, a few months. tom and greg are back in each others’ orbits (or maybe, in some awful, festering, never-let-the-wound-heal way, they never fully left), but it’s definitely different. maybe greg is still going out with comfry. maybe he’s long past. tom, notably, is out--he’s dating men, maybe even getting together with some particular man, and he’s happy.

and greg fucking hates it. THAT’S what i’m holding out for, the complete 180. finally, tom is taking joy in some totally normal, relatively “healthy” relationship outside of the roy family, and greg, who has his own concerns and his own life, like, entirely, cannot fucking stand it. he hates this guy tom likes. he mocks him in as roylike a way he can get away with underneath his fundamental gregitude. honestly, he steps up to the active sabotage of tom’s relationship, all without realizing what the fuck he’s doing or--more to the point--why. 

and when it works, when tom’s left with nothing but greg again (without ever actually having greg), he’s just like... why? why can’t i be happy, greg? and greg’s left stuttering to say... because it was me? you said it was me. because you planted an idea in my head and now i’m twisted up about it. because you brought me down with you, so you certainly don’t get to walk away.

and there’s a moment where it clicks--that they’ve officially made each other worse people than when they started, and now there’s no way out. so okay, greg, you’ve tanked my last chance at a normal relationship, come collect the pathetic fruits of your labor. right, tom, you planted this idea in my head when you told me you wanted me, now come reap what you’ve sewn. 

family gatherings, needless to say, get unbearable. 

[stranger-who-writes-fiction]

so after reading supergirl woman of tomorrow I’ve been really hungry for comics with really good art. comics that I’ve enjoyed (thanks to recs from friends) are cosmoknights and paper girls.

so I wanted to ask, do you have any recs (supergirl or not) for comics with great art?

OOOOoooh, I do indeed have some recommendations! (I too am always hungry for Really Good Comic Art, and I'll admit that I'm still working to go outside my comfort zone and try new creators/types of stories, so this list is not exhaustive! But hopefully some of these titles can act as springboards for further exploration--that's how I've been going about it!)

RIGHT, SO! In terms of 'cape comics' and superhero stuff:

Stuart Immonen's Superman: Secret Identity. Immonen is regarded as one of the best 'cape comics' artists out there. He's since moved on to self-published indie titles, but yeah. Not only is this a great 'Superman' story but also, like:

Russell Dauterman's Thor run with Jane Foster. Since Love and Thunder recently came out, I think they've collected this story in it's own trade, so it's maybe easier/cheaper to hunt down? Otherwise it's available in three hardcover omnibuses (omnibi???) and it's basically gorgeous:

Anything with Darwyn Cooke art. New Frontier is the big one but pretty much all of his work is phenomenal.

Elena Casagrande's Black Widow run. Eisner-winning book that Marvel decided to cancel at issue 15. *cue frustrated grumbling* The run has several fill in artists but when Casagrande's on? Beautiful double page spreads and, since it's a Kelly Thompson book, a whole lotta De Luca effect!

(Note: The book itself is not in black and white, I believe this was shared either by Casagrande or Thompson via a newsletter to show the process/bts stuff)

**Cliff Chiang's Catwoman Lonely City. The artist behind Papergirls doing a stellar 'Old Lady Selina' book. Great stuff.

**Greg Smallwood's Human Target. Tom King gets all the good artists, I tell ya! XD Really lovely homage to mid-century illustration, and a fairly compelling Noir-y murder mystery, told with superheroes!

Anything with Jamal Campbell art: I think the 'second season' of Naomi just wrapped (which is literally what they called the comic--not to be confused with the actual TV season ) and **Far Sector is also out as a completed trade. I *love* the way Campbell renders his figures. (And it's all him! Inks, colors, the whole deal!)

Dan Mora's Batman/Superman World's Finest. Everything Dan Mora draws is just flat-out awesome. Slick! Dynamic! Begging for an animated adaptation of some sort! Would also recommend checking out his Power Rangers stuff (he's got this very cool oneshot about like. Redemption Arc Alt-Universe Kimberly Hart/Pink Ranger. It's great.) and I've not read it myself but **Once and Future is coming to a close, so if you're into Arthurian Legends, that might be one to look in to.

Honorable Cape Comic Mentions: Anything and Everything by either Chris Samnee or Doc Shaner. (Daredevil and the current, ongoing Mary Marvel title especially.) For Samnee, beautiful use of spot blacks and a mastery of sequential storytelling; for Shaner, his color game is on point and his character acting/figure work is wonderful.

Cape Comic Anthologies:

Batman Black and White, Superman Red and Blue, Wonder Woman Black and Gold, Solo, and Wednesday Comics. Anthology books are usually a hard sell because there's no guarantee that you're going to enjoy all the stories, so I don't typically recommend them. However, these collections specifically focus on the art side of things--most of them feature a kind of artistic 'gimmick'. (I.e. limited color palettes, newspaper comic formatting, etc.) There's a ton of folks featured in these books--Batman Black and White especially, I think there's multiple volumes of that. A great way to find new artists to check out!

Non-Superhero Stuff:

Matías Bergara's Step by Bloody Step. The trade comes out soon; it's an entirely wordless comic, so the art literally carries the entire book. XD It's heckin' gorgeous, and OUR BOY MAT LOPES ON COLORRSSS

Jeff Smith's Bone. A classic in both black and white, and color!

Luke Pearson's Hilda. The series upon which the adorable Netflix show is based! Beautiful color design and fun panel construction throughout.

Jonathan Case's Little Monarchs. This one came out recent-ish I believe. Really compelling premise rooted in real-world science, and features in-universe 'field notes' and illustrations, all meticulously rendered.

**Elsa Charretier's Love Everlasting. Okay, you wanna know the WILD thing about Charretier??? She was an aspiring actress at one point, but she wasn't happy with it. Her partner at the time wanted to write comics, so he bluffed his way through a pitch with a pro without any pages. He asked her to draw some and BOOM, that's how she decided to teach herself how to draw comics!!! In 2012!!! Insanity. In the best way.

Tracy Butler's Lackadaisy. Easily one of the most beautiful and INCREDIBLY clever webcomics around. It's a bunch of rum-runner cats. I know Butler has a Patreon these days but I *think* the comic itself is still available for free.

Titles marked with a ** are Black Label/mature, so. Not appropriate for all ages. Just a heads up!

And there is the list! As mentioned, hopefully this is a good starting point for poking around into other corners of comic art; there's a TON of great indie titles out right now, and I gotta say, DC is doing a pretty great job with a lot of their Black Label stuff in terms of committing to artists in particular. Marvel is in a bit of a...not a slump, necessarily, but very tied to their 'house style' at the moment. (Alex Ross has a new Fantastic Four graphic novel coming out, though, so that should be interesting!)

If you have any other questions about these titles/further recs, feel free to send 'em my way!

[sigurdjarlson]

Hii I love your long Succession posts so much!! You're so creative and I always imagine the situations you describe as very vivid, so congrats hahaha I wanted to ask if you think Tom would stop approaching/getting close/touching Greg once (or if) he realizes he's in love/likes Greg? Like, would he stop radically from one day to the next, like full on ignoring the other or would he try but fail massively? If he did stop being affectionate or open towards him, what would Greg do to seek him out? Would he seek him out at all? I look forward to see your opinion on this, if you haven't written about this before, of course. Also, english is my second (third) language, so sorry for any errors! Byee ♡

Awww thank you so much :D I’m really glad you like them

I’m actually quite enamored with this scenario now. Especially if it’s after the s3 finale when they both really only have one another now. When they’ve made so much progress in their relationship.

I’d love if it drove Greg absolutely insane because he’s used to Tom being obsessed with him. It makes him realize just how much he actually needs Tom and wants him around

And it hurts because Tom seemingly doesn’t want anything to do with him now

Cw: Greg’s theoretical abandonment issues lmao

Hmmm…honestly I totally could see that happening. Tom realizes he’s in love with Greg and he’s like FUCK.

He starts avoiding Greg because surely it’ll fade if he stops spending so much time with him right? It’s not love, he’s just lonely (it’s love)

Greg however is baffled why Tom is suddenly blowing him off, ignoring him and generally avoiding him. He acts like Greg is diseased or something whenever Greg tries to casually touch his arm or pat him on the back.

He can’t even think of what he might have done to warrant this kind of treatment? Tom is volatile sometimes sure but this is weird.

Honestly I think it would drive Greg nuts because he’s so used to Tom being so..well, obsessed with him.

Even when Tom is angry with him he still seeks him out to torment him. He doesn’t really ignore him.

And there’s maybe this nagging fear in the back of Greg’s mind that Tom is done with him, he’s bored. Whatever he saw in Greg before has worn off and now he doesn’t want him around.

Because..he’s treating him the way everyone always treats Greg now.

Like he’s not even there or an annoying blip on their radar. A nuisance.

And maybe he shouldn’t be surprised? Everyone always leaves eventually. (Oof)

Still, he thought Tom was different. He thought Tom gave a shit about him but he’s starting wonder if maybe that was his mistake? Thinking anyone might give a shit about Cousin Greg of all people.

Or worse he’s realized that Greg’s feelings go beyond just friends.

Meanwhile Tom is miserable without Greg. He’s even more miserable when he notices how Greg keeps looking at him like a kicked puppy whenever he has to brush him off or when he ignores him.

Sometimes it’s not even like he looks like a kicked puppy. He looks like a puppy who someone dropped off on an abandoned country road and drove away from. He finds Greg staring sometimes like he’s waiting for him to come back.

Greg tries to throw himself into pleasing Tom work wise. It’s transparent and Tom feels kinda horrible when Greg looks at him with these big pleading eyes, hoping for some kind of recognition.

He can’t give it to him though. He knows this can’t end well. It’s better right? Better for both of them. Greg doesn’t know how he actually feels about him and if he did surely he wouldn’t want anything to do with him, right?

Except they’re both acting like they’re going through a break up. Tom l laying curled up on the couch eating ice cream and..god is he crying at some chick flick?

Kendall is kind of baffled when Greg comes running back to him, not for work stuff he assures. He just wants to be friends again. They’re cousins right? Family? There shouldn’t be bad blood between them-

He gets promptly told to fuck off and returns to his apartment with his tail between his legs. The few people Greg has tried to hang out with are friends but they’re not friends.

Not like Tom.

Tom really was his best friend he realizes and for the first time in years he kind of wants to cry.

He blinks them back and shoves the feeling down. Don’t think about it. Don’t think about it.

No one had ever seen Greg the way Tom had. Tom for all his flaws (and there were a lot of them) acted like Greg was actually worth something.

Now he just doesn’t want anything to do with him and Greg doesn’t understand what he did wrong.

It feels- it feels familiar in a way he doesn’t want to think about.

It feels like being abandoned.

It’s different in so many ways Tom is his friend not his father but it’s also not that different at all? It’s the same feeling of betrayal and confusion. The same hurt. Why don’t you want me anymore? What did I do?

And I can totally see him getting absolutely wasted (drunk, high, both actually) because he doesn’t want to feel this way anymore

He ends up calling Tom and going off. He’s yelling at him and Tom is fucking speechless on the other end of the call because he’s never heard Greg so upset.

He’s..clearly not sober though so Tom can’t help but he even more concerned than he already is. What the fuck is he on?

And he’s grabbing his coat and car keys before he can even think about it. How is he supposed to stay away now. Maybe there never was any hope of him staying away in the first place.

And sure Greg is downright furious when he shows up at his apartment but Tom does the only thing he can think of and hugs him. And then Greg is in his arms and fuck, he’s crying, clutching at him like a lifeline.

And Tom folds because he’s never been able to resist Greg. Not for long.

Greg kisses him before he can even think about how to bring up the subject of why he’s been acting this way. He kisses him back before he remembers Greg is fucking out of his mind drunk and high.

However he’s at a loss for words when Greg slides off the couch into the floor and settles between his knees, eyes still red rimmed. “Let me, I..I’ll make it good for you, Tom..Tommy? I can..I’m good at this-“

And yeah that’s not happening with him like this, it’s not happening when Tom can’t be sure if he’s doing this because he wants him or because he doesn’t want him to leave. (God is he really so desperate for in to stay?)

Greg flinches from the perceived rejection until Tom kisses him and then tries to reassure him he doesn’t mean never. He means not now. Not like this.

In truth, he isn’t sure if there will be a future time because he has no clue if Greg even really wants this or it’s whatever he snorted up his nose talking. He thinks..he thinks that’s not the case though. Greg seemed genuine when he kissed him.

He ends up just kind of comforting him until he finally passes out on him, pinning him to the couch with his dead weight. His back is going to kill him in the morning but it’s worth it.

They’ll talk in the morning

[mermaidsirennikita]

Thoughts on the Tom and Shiv marriage/relationship?

I enjoy watching it so much but also it is so dark to watch?

I've said this a lot but I do want to point out that it's a bit weird to me that people sometimes act like Tom... deserves it? Or that it's like, a great feminist subversion? Because I have seen those takes, and while there is some level of feminist critique that I think you can use when discussing TomShiv, on a very practical level she's totally abusive to him and I think Jesse sees it that way as well--the last episode kind of sealed that for me. Like, genderflip Tom and Shiv and everyone would have a hugely different reaction to them. Which is probably the point, right?

The thing is that I do think Tom sincerely loves Shiv. Sure, there is an element of social climbing and power and money there, but above all else I do think he has a genuine love for her. It's in the way that Matthew delivers lines like "well I fell in love with your sister" to Kendall, almost off the cuff. Zero pretense, almost a disdain for the fact that his love is being... doubted? Which to be fair, is a legitimate complaint, because Tom has been through enough for the family that like... I think it's clear that there have to be emotional stakes in it for him. It can't purely be motivated by what he can get outta the relationship, because he is getting N O T H I N G. Like, was Tom even gonna get a good jail funding package? If Tom had gone or goes to jail, 10/10 Shiv is gonna forget to restock his commissary account or whatever. First week in.

And I will add that while I absolutely agree that there is a homoerotic subtext... text... between Tom and Greg, I think that what we are actually seeing, tbh, is a fuckton of projection on Tom's end. I don't think Greg reeeeeeeally cares that much about Tom anymore. At one point he did--in s1, when he told Tom about Shiv cheating, that was genuine. I think Greg is being super corrupted, which of course he would be, and in turn he is resentful of Tom's admittedly outrageous behavior towards him.

But Tom's behavior is coming from a place of basically taking out his pain from his relationship with Shiv on Greg. Which, like, the show has BASICALLY told us this. In season 2, when Greg told Tom he wanted a "business open relationship"--not super long after Shiv asked Tom for an open relationship... Tom lost his shit. In the same sense, Tom took Greg asking him to take more prison time for him in stride because fuck, has Shiv not essentially been implicitly asking Tom to be okay with taking prison time for her family all season?

Tom does this because he is basically powerless, in his mind, against Shiv for several reasons. Chiefly because he does love her, as many victims of abuse do love their abusers; secondarily, because he is wrapped up in her life financially on every level (which, tbh, is like.. also a pretty classic hallmark of abuse); and thirdly, because I think he holds Shiv up as this ideal of where he needs to be in life. Tom has always been a social climber--from the pilot, he's been intensely aware of where he is in life compared to the Roys. They are aspirational to him. Letting go of Shiv would be letting go of a dream, in a sense. So it makes sense that he wants to have a baby with her, because not only is this something permanent that they can't deny, tying them together forever; it's also a way of legitimizing himself, by tying his blood to the Roys.

Shiv's feelings are so fucking murky--or they were, but that scene with her mom pretty much spelled it out, didn't it? Shiv is really just perpetuating a cycle of abuse. Her father kicked her and her brothers and waited for them to come back, which they always did; and she's essentially testing Tom's love by kicking him constantly and seeing if he'll come back. This past episode was perhaps one of the DARKEST episodes of television I've ever seen, and I was genuinely disturbed by Tom and Shiv's "foreplay".

But also.... and lol I do speak from experience... every one of those kids have daddy issues. However, there is some truth to the specific kinds of daddy issues you develop when you are the daughter of an emotionally abusive or absent father, which I think Shiv displays brilliantly. She is guarded, putting up emotional walls that Tom cannot break down and truly, I don't think she wants broken down--and at the same time, she is desperately trying to create this relationship with a male figure who will give her all of the love she needs, while receiving none in return, and who will never leave her.

I struggled for a while last season with why Shiv ultimately couldn't throw Tom to the wolves, and I think it's for the same reason that she's finally (seemingly) giving in to his desires for a baby.... to an extent. (I mean, I think going from let's have a baby to let's freeze embryos is definitely a ploy, but I also think that Shiv is dumb and quite possibly got pregnant during the whole "I don't love you" sex.). She doesn't love Tom, really; she almost seems to resent his existence. But she needs someone to fill that gap that Logan left. Which is different, I think, than the totally emotionally frozen relationship he has with his sons; we see him have these little phony cutesy moments with Shiv. "Pinky", and all that bullshit. It's a different kind of pain that I imagine is quite intense, because that illusion of an emotionally close bond, the "special" daddy's girl/father bond was dangled as a carrot for her.

I mean, then you go into all of the psychological theories about how women who are into men and were raised or at least partially raised by men are essentially taught how to flirt and develop romantic relationships with men based off of their early relationships with their fathers. Look at Shiv and consider that.

It's just a sad, strange little relationship and I feel bad for both of them in different ways but I..... probably feel worse for Tom. Tbh.

[waitimcomingtoo]

Baked Chicken

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Submitted by @mylittleladysblog :

A/n: Shoutout to Greg Townley, though I pray he never sees this.

It was the first week of shooting the newest Spider-Man movie, and you were finally wearing costumes. Getting to wear MJ’s comfortable clothes was always an exciting part of the film making process for you. You saw your stunt double in the same white t shirt and ripped black jeans as you were in and gave her a high five. She didn’t wear her wig unless she was filming, so you could easily be told a let. Unlike Tom and Greg, who were impossible to differentiate between when they were wearing the same costume and facing the back.

Impossible.

“Hey you.” You spotted Tom with his face buried in the script and tapped him on the shoulder. After two movies together, now working on your third, you were best friends.

And it is perfectly normal to be in love with your best friend.

“Hey Y/n.” Toms stunt double, Greg turned around with a surprised smile.

“Greg! What a surprise!” You laughed in shock and tried to hide your embarrassment for mistaking Greg as Tom.

“Surprise? You tapped me on the shoulder.” Greg reminded you, not realizing you had been looking for Tom. You nodded and decided to lie as to not hurt his feelings.

“And it’s very surprising that you turned around. I could’ve been anyone. I could’ve had a knife!” You laughed awkwardly at your lame attempt at a cover up and Greg saw right through it.

“You thought I was Tom.” He said matter of factly.

“I did, yes.” You admitted. “But getting to talk to you is a lovely surprise.”

“Right.” He laughed dismissively and you instantly felt guilty.

“I’m sorry. I am happy to see you, though. You’re doing a really great job with the stunts.” You told him sincerely and he gave you a half smile.

“Thanks. Its really not that scary if you ever wanted to try it. I could even show you.” He offered with a certain kindness to it.

“Haha, thanks but I think I’ll let my stunt double handle that. I’m not a huge fan of heights or falling to my death.” You said and he laughed.

“Nonsense. I wouldn’t let you fall.” He shrugged shyly. 👉👈 I’ll put them in every story just watch me

“Thanks, Greg.” You smiled, pleasantly surprised with how the accidental conversation had gone.

“Hey, Y/n.” Tom came from behind you and put his hand on the small of your back, something he did when the paparazzi on the red carpets were shouting a little too loudly or if someone got a little too close to you. “Hi, Greg.”

“Tom!” You leaned into his touch, sensing he was a little off.

“I’ll leave you guys to it.” Greg nodded and walked towards the trailers.

“Since when are you and Greg friends?” Tom asked as soon as Greg was out of earshot. He kept his hand on your back and you realized he felt threatened.

“Since we started rehearsing in costume and I can’t tell you guys apart from the back.” You told him to ease his mind.

“That’s too bad.” Tom laughed lightly, relieved to know the playful shoulder tap was meant for him.

“It is too bad. I just wasted some perfectly good flirting on your stunt double.” You joked and Toms angst was immediately alleviated. Neither of you dared to say it, but you both knew you had something going on. Tom was just as hopelessly in love with you as you were with him, but the fear of getting rejected and then having to continue playing love interests stopped you from confessing.

It just didn’t stop you from flirting.

“Oh yeah? Maybe I should start doing my own stunts, then, like Tom Cruise.” Tom said and flexed his arm to make you laugh. “Makes the action shots look a a lot cooler anyway, you know?”

“I have never seen a Tom Cruise movie.” You said as you playfully squeezed his muscle.

“Really?” Tom asked.

“I don’t even think I’ve seen a trailer of his.” You realized. “I doubt I could even name one of his movies.”

“Mission impossible.” Tom told you.

“Well, I don’t think it’d be impossible for me to name one but it might take a while.” You disagreed, not realizing he was naming a movie.

“No I was- you know what? Never mind.” Tom laughed fondly and you had a feeling you missed the joke. Not wanting the conversation to end there, you gave him a soft shrug.

“Maybe we can watch one together one day.” You suggested as you fixed them collar of his shirt.

“I would love to.” He said with a faint blush.

That night, you watched about 47 minutes of a Tom Cruise movie before falling asleep in Toms lap. He made it midway of the movie before dozing off as well.

You woke up first the next morning and jolted a little when you didn’t recognize where you were. You quickly realized you were in Toms trailer, smiling softly when you saw his sleeping body next to you. Your legs were practically braided together, so you couldn’t move. You nudged him a little and in his sleep, he pulled you back on to the bed and held you to his chest.

“Morning.” You giggled as he rolled on top of you, still half asleep.

“Good morning.” Tom said groggily, opening his eyes a title. “What time is it?”

“7. We have to be in makeup by 8.” You checked your phone. You pushed him off of you but he held on tight, leaving you with your chin resting on his chest as he stared down at you, arms clad around your waist and resting on your back.

“I kinda want to stay here all day. Is that bad?” He said with a sleepy smile.

“It’s not bad if I want to do it too.” You smiled and brushed a hair off his nose. “We can stay here a few more minutes and then go get some breakfast. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.” He nodded and ran his fingers through your messy hair.

~

You spotted Tom later in the blue plaid button up he was wearing as Peters costume. After the morning you’d had together, you were less worried of his rejection and more focused on sealing the deal. You walked up to him with confidence and gave him a hug from behind.

“Hey.” You wrapped your arms around his torso, missing him after a long day of shooting separate scenes. You were surprised to hear a deep sigh come from his mouth, as if he wasn’t happy to see you.

“It’s Greg.” Greg said and you quickly let go as you realized you were hugging the wrong boy.

“Oh shit.” You whispered as Greg turned around. “I mean, hey Greg! Don’t be silly, I knew it was you.” You lied through your teeth.

“You did?” Greg asked with a hint of skepticism and a hint of hope.

“Well of course! I just had to give my special guy a hug, like I always do.” You said with unnatural cheerfulness. You were a great actress, but a terrible liar.

“I thought you only hugged me when you thought I was Tom.” Greg said and you felt stuck.

“What? Me? Never. I hug you because I…love you.” You blurted the first thing that came to your mind. You barely knew Greg and now you were telling him you loved him.

“You love me?” Greg said with a bright smile.

“Who doesn’t love Greg? Not me, I’ll tell you that.” You slapped his arm. “Love me some Greg every now and then.” You committed to your lie.

“Thanks, Y/n. That means a lot.” Greg was somehow unaware of your deceit.

“Anytime, pal. Anytime.” You punched him lightly on the shoulder. As he walked away, you made a mental note to double check before hugging anybody in a plaid shirt.

You went two full weeks without accidentally hugging Greg after that. All your hugs had been given to Tom, who they were rightfully meant for. He enjoyed the affection from you and at the same time, Greg began to miss it.

~

“That was amazing! God, you take my breath away.” You threw your arms around Toms shoulders and squeezed after a strenuous shoot with lots of wire work. He put his hands over yours and gave them a light squeeze before turning around.

“Aw, thanks Y/n.” Greg smiled and you felt like an idiot.

“How the hell does this keep happening?” You thought.

“Greg!” You said with a fake smile as you scanned the background for Tom.

“You thought I was Tom again, didn’t you?” He asked, a little disappointed.

“Would you stop with that? I always know it’s you.” You blatantly lied to his face

“You don’t have to say that, Y/n. If you were expecting Tom-“ Greg began.

“I wasn’t expecting Tom.” You cut him off, even though you were completely expecting Tom.

“So I take your breath away?” He tested you.

“Absolutely.” You let out a fake scoff.

“That’s funny.” He said with a small smile.

“Why?” You asked.

“You do the same to me.” He said timidly.

“Oh.” You said softly.

“See you around.” He nodded and walked away, leaving you confused and questioning what he meant.

~

The next time you waited for Tom after filming a scene, you made sure it was actually Tom. You waited until Toms sweet brown eyes met yours before you ran to him.

“Tom! Great job.” You threw your arms around him and buried your face in his neck. Tom happily picked you up as you wrapped your legs around his waist. He set you down gently and squeezed your face between his hands with an endearing grin.

“Thanks, princess.” He said. The nickname made your heart skip a beat. You smiled brightly at him until your eyes trailed to the right. Tom followed your gaze and saw Greg leaving set. You broke out of Toms embrace and went to Greg.

“Greg! Awesome work!” You said honestly and gave him a quick hug, which he happily accepted. Tom felt jealousy bubble in the pit of his tummy at the sight of you and Greg. He had no idea when it started, but he seemed to be seeing you and Greg together everywhere he turned.

“Thanks, Y/n. Catch you later.” Greg smiled and left the set.

“I didn’t realize you and Greg were on a hugging basis now.” Tom said, sounded less friendly than he intended. He was annoyed, and you could tell.

“I just have to convince him that I hug him on purpose.” You said and Tom furrowed his eyebrows.

“What does that even mean?” Tom inquired.

“I’ll explain later. Come on. I’ve missed you all day.” You tugged him by the hand and the pit in his tummy was replaced with butterflies as you tugged him towards your trailer.

~

“Hey man.” Greg said as he walked up to the snack table and stood behind Tom.

“Mate, awesome work today. The stunts look great.” Tom complimented.

“You’re doing something great work yourself.” Greg returned the favor.

“Thanks. I could never do what you do, though. They must’ve dunked you in that water a thousand times.” Tom kept the conversation light.

“It’s worth it. Especially this next scene.” Greg smiled to himself.

“Next scene?” Tom asked as he stirred some sugar into his tea.

“When MJ dives in the lake after Peter and kisses him through the mask.” Greg said with a light blush on his cheeks. Tom knew the scene was being shot today, but he assumed it was going to be between Greg and your stunt double.

“Oh, right. You’re excited to spend all that time underwater?” Tom forced a laugh before taking a sip of tea.

“I’m excited for Y/n to kiss me.” Greg laughed and Tom choked on his tea. He snapped out of it and tried to keep his cool as he continued the conversation.

“Oh, yeah? I thought her stunt double was gonna do that.” Tom said as he dabbed his chin with a napkin.

“Nah, man. That’s what makes her so cool. She said something about seeing a Tom Cruise movie for the first time and wanting to do her own stunts. She’s gonna be the one diving in the lake and kissing me underwater. Best job ever, right?” Greg nudged Tom playfully, having no idea how much Tom liked you. Or how much this conversation was killing him.

“Right.” Tom laughed nervously. “Are you into her or something?”

“God, I am in love with that girl. And I think she likes me back.” Greg said confidently and Toms heart stopped. You were always talking to Greg, and usually seemed very happy when you were. You hadn’t mentioned anything about liking someone, but then again, you never talked about that stuff with Tom. Toms mouth went dry at the thought of you losing you to his stunt double.

“What makes you so sure?” He asked curiously, a little afraid to hear the answer.

“She’s always running to see me or hugging me from behind. And she compliments me so much, it’s insane.” Greg chuckled. “I think she might really like me.”

“And all the hugs from behind, are you sure they’re meant for you? I don’t mean to burst your bubble or anything, but she and I are very close and she could be mistaking you for me when we’re in the same clothes. Or something.” Tom stammered.

“That’s what I always thought, but she assured me it wasn’t true.” Greg smiled to himself at the thought of the conversation you had once. “She told me I take her breath away, man. How cute is that?”

“Adorable.” Tom gulped. He didn’t know you said that to Greg, and it made him upset to think about you giving such a sweet compliment to someone else.

“I’m gonna ask her out.” Greg decided. “I’m tired of waiting. I’m just gonna do it.”

“Ask her out? When?” Tom panicked.

“Next time I see her. You’re shooting a scene on set B later, right? She usually hangs around when you’re filming. I’ll probably catch her there.” Greg drew up his plan.

“Ha, yeah.” Tom laughed weakly.

“Alright. See you later, dude.” Greg patted Toms back and walked away from the table.

“Later.” Tom said, but Greg was already gone.

Tom left the snack table and started furiously texting you, asking you to meet him anywhere as quickly as possible. He entirely missed you walked past him until he heard your voice.

“Hey Greg.” You said as you walked by, also buried in your phone. Tom stopped walking and looked at you curiously.

“It’s Tom.” Tom said, a little bitterly, and you stopped in your tracks. You turned around with a surprised smile and walked back to him.

“Oh My God, really?” You said in disbelief, looking him up and down to make sure it was true.

“Were you expecting Greg?” Tom worried after the conversation he’d just had with Greg.

“I am literally never expecting Greg. That’s my problem.” You laughed and fixed Toms hair that had fallen into his face.

“What?” Tom asked, feeling better now that you were being your usual flirty self with him.

“Nothing. Long story.” You shook your head and stopped touching his hair, content with how it looked.

“Okay. You ready for that lake scene later? I heard you’re doing it yourself.” Tom faked a smile, desperate to know your thoughts on shooting the scene with Greg.

“I am! I’m really excited for it actually. You’re gonna be there right?” You asked for confirmation.

“Definitely.” Tom assured you, trying to read your reaction.

“Cool. I like when you watch me film.” You told him and he perked up a little.

“Having me there doesn’t make you nervous? Every time I know my mum is watching a take, I forget how to blink.” Tom eased up and you laughed.

“It’s different with you. I feel more at ease knowing you’re watching. It calms me down.” You told him and he couldn’t help from smiling.

“I’m happy to hear that.” He said honestly. “And you’re doing the scene with Greg, right?”

“Yeah. Greg.” You nodded slightly, not wanting to change the subject.

“Great guy.” Tom commented with an uneasy smile.

“No, totally.” You said stiffly. You did not want to be talking about Greg with the boy you liked.

“Are you excited to kiss him?” Tom blurted and you looked at him strangely.

“Excited? Bleh. It’s through the mask anyway and it’s in the script. It’s nothing like what we shot yesterday.” You tried to bring the conversation back to a place where progress was being made. Toms face flushed when he thought of the climatic kiss you shot yesterday. After 18 takes of kissing you like he’d never see you again, Tom went home dizzy with a dreamy smile on his face.

“Yeah I um, I enjoyed yesterday.” He looked at the ground and smiled shyly. 👉👈 I’ll never stop.

“We should do it again sometime.” You said boldly and Toms attention whipped back to you. He had to stop the giant smile that wanted to break through from surfacing.

“I agree. Maybe without the camera though.” His mouth moved faster than his brain, but you seemed to like it.

“Yeah.” You smiled and took a step closer to Tom. “I meant to tell you this before, but you’re doing a great job with this film. I love staying on set to watch you do your scenes. Especially the emotional ones, Tom.” You sighed in content. “You take my breath away.

“I do? Me?” Tom asked when he recognized the compliment you had told Greg.

“Yeah, you.” You laughed at his strange response. “Why?”

“Can I ask you something?” He became serious.

“Anything.” You assured him.

“Have you ever hugged Greg thinking he was me?” He asked if as casually as he could to not make it weird.

“Um, only like everyday. That’s why I was so surprised it was actually you earlier. Why?” You wondered how he had caught on to your ongoing dilemma.

“There’s something I need to tell you.” He said, all playfulness gone from his tone. Tom wanted to tell you about Greg’s plan, not necessarily to steal you from Greg, but to prepare you for what was coming. If Tom was putting the pieces together correctly, all your flirty banter with Greg was intended for Tom. Now Greg was whipped and you were about to look like the bad guy.

He also wanted to steal you from Greg.

“Tom Holland to set B. Tom Holland to set B.” A voice rang through on the announcements at the worst possible time.

“You can tell me after. I gotta head to makeup anyway.” You smiled and Tom felt his panic rise. “It’s just a touch-up, so I’ll be by soon to watch your scene. Good luck.” You squeezed his arm and walked away. Tom watched with dread as you left before he had a chance to tell you what was coming.

~

Tom stood on his mark and listened to what the director wanted him to do in the scene, even though his mind was a million miles away. He only barely heard them call “action” and began to deliver his lines with his focus all over the place. His eyes trailed off his scene partner and landed on Greg, slowly approaching you as you watched the scene with a giddy smile. Toms mouth went dry and he purposely flubbed his line so they could stop filming. The director began to give him some more directions, but Toms focus was pointed at you and Greg.

“Hey, Y/n.” Greg taped your shoulder and you turned around.

“Freaking Greg.” Tom muttered through gritted teeth.

“Hey Greg. Come by to watch the scene?” You asked politely.

“I came to see you, actually.” Greg said, making your head turn.

“You did?” You asked, not used to him initiating the conversations you had.

“Yeah, there was something I needed to tell you.” Greg smiled nervously and Tom felt himself beginning to sweat, the cold kind that chilled your spine.

“Oh, sure. Go ahead.” You said and gave Greg your full attention.

“No no no no no no.” Tom whispered in despair.

“What was that?” Kevin, the director asked.

“I said ‘woah woah woah woah woah’ because this scene is just so good.” Tom lied and turned his attention back to you.

“Can we go somewhere private, actually?” Greg requested and Tom nearly fell to the ground. He wished he could leave the set and ask you to stay, ask you to be his instead, but he couldn’t. He had to stand by and watch as another boy whisked you away. A boy in the exact same freaking clothing as Tom was in.

“Okay.” You made eye contact with Tom and Greg began to lead you away. You weren’t blind to the look of devastation on his face and gave him a quizzical look. Tom shrugged sadly and you began to wonder if this had anything to do with what he was trying to tell you before.

You and Greg walked off set and found a quiet space near the trailers. Your tummy did flip flops as Greg cleared his throat, obviously getting ready to tell you something. You took a deep breathe and lead the conversation.

“What did you need to tell me?” You asked.

“I guess I’ll just be straightforward. I like you, Y/n. I like you a lot.” Greg admitted. “I wasn’t gonna say anything because I didn’t think I’d ever have a chance with a girl like you, but then you kept hugging me and complimenting me and I don’t know. It made me think you liked me back? Am I right when I say that?”

“Greg, I…” You absorbed his words and let them sink to the bottom of your tummy like a rock. “…am a jerk. I’m a total jerk.”

“That’s not true. You’re the nicest person on this set.” Greg insisted and you felt even worse.

“I’m not.” You sighed. “I do admire your work and I am always happy to see you, but I have never approached you thinking you were…well, you. I’m always-“

“-looking for Tom?” Greg finished your sentence.

“Yes.” You came clean. “I shouldn’t have lied to you, but I just felt so bad. I didn’t want you to feel unappreciated, because I really do think you’re great. I didn’t realize lying would make the situation worse.”

“I had a feeling you weren’t actually excited to see me.” Greg laughed halfheartedly. “Probably should’ve listened to that feeling.”

“I’m so sorry.” You apologized and squeezed his arm.

“You know what? It’s okay. We wouldn’t have worked out anyway.” Greg said with a sincerity you appreciated. He didn’t seem hurt, just relieved to get it off his chest.

“Why do you say that?” You asked out of curiosity.

“Well, like I said. You take my breath away.” Greg said and you felt guilt again. “You make me so nervous, it’s not even funny. And there’s this study that says if you meet someone and they make you nervous, and your palms get sweaty, and your heart races out of your chest, then they aren’t the one for you. It’s not until you meet someone who makes you feel totally calm that you’ve found your soulmate.”

“Oh.” You said quietly, taking his words into consideration.

“Have you ever had that? Someone who makes you feel at peace?” He asked quietly.

“I don’t know.” You told him, too deep in thought to give him a better answer.

“Greg Townley to Lot A. Greg Townley to Lot A.” Rang over the announcements.

“That’s my cue. I’ll see you around, Y/n.” Greg gave you a kind smile.

“See you.” You said sadly. He walked away and you felt your heart sink with every step he took. You didn’t want to be with him, but you also didn’t want to break his heart. He was so kind about your rejection that it made you even sadder. He deserved better than an “I don’t know.”

You took a walk to clear your head and didn’t get back to your trailer until the sun had set. You’d taken a lot of time to think, asking yourself what today was supposed to teach you. If Greg could put himself out there and confess his feelings, you could too. You could also tell him the real reason you had to turn him down. You opened your trailer door and jumped when you saw Greg in there already, facing the wall and flipping through a magazine. You took a deep breath and prepared to rip the band-aid off.

“Greg! I need to talk to you. Remember when you asked me if I had someone who made me feel at peace and I told you I didn’t know?” You asked. “I do know. It’s Tom. It’s always been Tom. You are so sweet and talented and kind but I am so in love with that boy, it’s unbelievable.” You let out a laugh. “I really appreciate you telling me about your feelings and I’m sorry I can’t reciprocate them, but it has nothing to do with you. It’s just because I’m in love with someone else. I’m sorry.”

Greg had stopped flipping through the magazine at some point and stood frozen, facing the wall. You were out of breath from your rant and his stillness wasn’t helping your anxiety.

“Please say something.” You begged. Greg slowly turned around and lo and behold,

It was Tom.

“Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me.” You yelled, not to anyone in particular, but it was slightly aimed at God.

“You’re in love with me?” Tom asked like it was the craziest thing he ever heard. You gave him a shrug, not knowing what else to do.

“Now it’s you? Why hasn’t it been you the 500 times I’ve given Greg the best hug of his life? The one time I need to talk to Greg, and it’s you? Really?” You asked the Heavens why you consistently made that mistake. “Oh and yeah, I am.” You sheepishly answered his question.

“I thought Greg was gonna ask you out.” He said, hurt evident in his tone.

“He did.” You told him, once again talking about Greg instead of your budding romance with each other.

“And you said no?” Tom tilted his head to the side.

“Did you not hear my whole rant?” You practically yelled at him out of frustration.

“Well, not the first part because I was reading a recipe for baked chicken-“ Tom glanced back down at the magazine and pure rage filled your body.

“TOM!” You yelled to regain his attention.

“It was a good recipe!” He defended as he pointed to the centerfold. “It has sweet potatoes.”

“I’m trying to tell you how I feel and you’re-wait, sweet potatoes?” You pretended to be caught off guard at the new information.

“Yeah, look.” He handed you the magazine as you glared at him for not getting your sarcasm. You smacked it out of his hands and he stared at it on the ground. You both stood in silence for a moment, staring at the magazine before Tom started to laugh. You were angry at first, but started laughing as well when you realized he was messing with you.

“You don’t care about the chicken.” You said indefinitely.

“Nope.” He shook his head.

“You’re messing with me.” You realized.

“Yep.” He nodded with a cheeky grin.

“I hate you so much.” You whined and stamped your foot.

“I may be in love with you, but you’re always gonna be my best friend before anything else. And there’s nothing I love more than messing with my best friend.” Tom took your hand and pulled you against his body. You let out a little surprised laugh but quieted down when you saw the look on his face as he took your face between his hands. “You think I care about baked chicken when my princess told me she’s in love with me? You think I’m worried about sweet potatoes now? At a time like this?”

“That was half sweet and half absolutely ridiculous to listen to.” You berated him and he laughed. You could feel his body moving against yours as he laughed and it had a certain effect on you.

“Was it the part about the sweet potatoes?” He pouted and you wanted to smack him.

“No.” You huffed and he pressed his forehead against yours.

“The baked chicken, then?” He asked.

“Say baked chicken one more time and I promise you-“ You were interrupted by Tom kissing you. You’d kissed plenty of times before for the camera, but this one felt different.

This one felt earned.

Tom pulled away after a minute and let out a soft chuckle.

“I’ve been in love with you for years, and all it took was Greg and some baked chicken for us to finally get together?” He whispered to not disturb the peace.

“Don’t mistake my gentle tone for calmness because I can assure you, I am filled with waters of rage,” You said sweetly and Tom laughed, “but I dare you to say baked chicken again. I dare you.”

“Alright, I’ll stop.” Tom smiled and pecked your lips again. “We can’t go to far from set, so I have some ramen and Cheerios if you want dinner. It can be like our first date.”

“God, ramen and Cheerios? You spoil me too much.” You teased him over his food choices.

“Says the girl with nothing in her trailer but popcorn and no microwave.” Tom teased you.

“It’s not my fault that they took away my microwave after I accidentally put the mental cup in there.” You shot back. Tom bit his lips as he stared at you with a dopey smile. It wasn’t long before you smiled back.

“Tell you what princess, as soon as we get a break from filming, I want you to come over to my house for a real date.” Tom said as he wrapped his arms around you. “I have plans for us.”

“Plans?” You asked with a cheeky smile.

“There’s this great recipe-“ Tom didn’t get to finish his sentence, as he was smacked across the face with one of your pillows.

More like this: If We Were A Movie

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[pynkhues]

What do you think the dynamic between shiv and tom plus shiv and her family if she got pregnant? I kind of want to see it

Oh god, hahahaha, that's such a question, anon! I kind of feel like everything would change and nothing at all simultaneously?

There are so few kids on this show, it's kind of hard to gauge how any of them would respond to having more of them in their orbit. Kendall has Iverson and Sophie, of course, but they didn't even make an appearance beyond Sophie's birthday party in s2 while Kendall was spiralling, and in s1 the only time the broader family ever seemed to really think about them was when Logan was judging Kendall's 'soft' fathering and Roman was, y'know, getting a kick out of that in that way Roman does, haha. They certainly didn't seem to factor into Logan's decisions when leaking stories about Kendall's relapse (before it had actually happened - the self-fulfilling prophecy is, as always, devastating), although we know it had an impact on Sophie through Rava's phonecall and likely impacted Kendall's already fairly limited custody.

For Shiv and Tom, it probably would be different given Shiv's a woman and has already been sort of struck from the succession plan after s2. I think her brothers would probably all see it as something that only further took her out of the running altogether, where as oddly enough, I don't think it would necessarily for Logan? Like I said above, I don't think grandkids factor much into Logan's decisionmaking, and I think he's already sort of pigeonholed the parenting as Tom's role not Shiv's, haha, I mean, god, he already effectively told him to get back in the house and make him some in a way we don't usually hear aimed at men.

For them together though - - I kinda feel like that dynamic would be extended? I don't think Shiv would be a natural mother at all (like, god, what example does she have in Caroline?) and I think the narcissistic part of her wouldn't enjoy sharing Tom's attention, especially since I think Tom would be a nurturing (albeit annoying and weird, haha) father. I can see Shiv working until late in her pregnancy and then being desperate to get back to work pretty quickly after she has the baby, but growing resentful and jealous if Tom and their child grow close.

Mess! Basically!!!

Also putting the competition aside, I do lowkey think both Connor and Roman would be kind of doting in very, very different ways, haha. I feel like Roman would be insulting and a dick about both the pregnancy and the baby, but weirdly and obnoxiously good in certain ways too, and you know Connor would be sending Shiv and Tom anti-vax conspiracy theories the second she said she was pregnant and sending her like - - ¬crystals that are supposed to cure morning sickness.

Kendall would, of course, be the absolute worst by being the holder of Expert Opinions that Shiv doesn't want and Tom would latch on to use for Bonding Opportunities, and to like, separate him and Greg. Dads only club!!

Logan would probably forget she was pregnant at all, and Shiv would be absurdly relieved for it, hahaha.

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Alternate Future chapter 24: Fragments (originally published on August 23, 2021)

AN: The end of the Alternate Future begins here! Or this story at least, I've got a few follow-ups planned after finishing this one, one of which I might set up here. But regardless, here we are at the end of Part 3 and from here on out, things will go downhill for our heroes & uphill for our villains. Can Steven be saved from both himself and Black Rutile? Who knows? Except for me that is, and a very select few as well. But I've had enough keeping you in suspense, let's get straight to the action.

Synopsis: Steven's condition gets worse and he seeks help from Jasper.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Dee Bradley Baker as Lion

Ron Perlman as ?

--

"Hear me my followers and rejoice!" Black Rutile declared, with Aquamarine perched on her shoulder, as she recorded herself making a grand speech to her remaining minions in her cave lair. "Our day of revengeance is at hand! No more shall that sanctimonious half-breed tyrant enforce his iron-fisted rule over our people! Because despite claiming to be a pure-hearted child, recent intel has confirmed he is far from it."

As an example, Black Rutile played the footage of Steven crashing his father's van that her satellite had gathered. "Look at this absolutely abhorrent act." She stated. "What kind of child would ever dare murder their father without any rhyme or reason?"

"Actually, there have been a few throughout this planet's history that have done just that." White Topaz leaned into view to point out.

"SHUT IT TOPAZ!" Black Rutile angrily commanded before turning back to her viewers. "Anyways, soon he will be exposed as the monster he truly is, and with the army we have regrown from the colonies some of my subordinates have retaken, we shall lay siege to the tyrannical Crystal Gems and strike them at our weakest!"

"You sure about that my Rutile?" Black Rutile's Topaz bodyguard leaned back in, much to her master's anger. "'Cause I've gotten word from Cinnabar's faction that some of your former Black Pearls have formed, like, a little squadron to fight back against her."

"Can you not ruin my speech, you ignoramus?!" Black Rutile shoved her Topaz away. Just as she was about to make a grand conclusion to her speech, Black Rutile quickly declared "End transmission." and shut off the recording. "Now look what you did, I was making a motivational speech to my allies, but you had to keep getting in the way just like you always do!"

"Always?" White Topaz replied while making shadow puppets against the cave wall. "Look, I may spoil your plans some of the time, but your ego is just as much to blame the rest of the time."

"That is indeed true Topaz, but now I must ask," Black Rutile said. "what is with this attitude? Where's the overly polite idiot that always followed my orders without question, no matter how horrible they are?"

"I'm betting she's already having second thoughts about your plans." Aquamarine advised her superior.

"You mind if I," Eyeball suggested before making a slashing noise with her mouth and pulling her chisel from her gem. "put her to rest?"

"I'm being serious you guys!" White Topaz said. "The three of you may think you're Gems of the people, but I don't think Gems like those would ever hyperfocus on ruining the life of one person instead of just focusing on something healthier!"

"Like what, forcing ourselves to join those ingrates and deprive ourselves of our way of life in favor of becoming part of a hive-mind?" Black Rutile asked, menacingly pulling out her bowie knife to threaten her Topaz with. "I have been plotting against the Crystal Gems ever since Steven brainwashed the Diamonds, and I refuse to abandon those plans just because you don't like them! Now, are you going to be a good little bodyguard, or do you want to ditch your best friend in favor of the hypocrite?"

Although White Topaz showed tons of reluctance, she nervously got down on one knee and bowed her head to her three teammates. "No, my Rutile. I am at your beck and call, whenever you need me."

"Very good my Topaz." Black Rutile put away her knife to pat White Topaz on the head with an evil smile, before turning away to tap at her visor. "Now if we have nothing else to discuss, it seems the seeds of doubt I have planted in Steven's mind that fateful night have finally begun to grow." She stated before her visor created a holographic chessboard with pieces resembling herself & her minions on one side, and the Crystal Gems & the Diamonds on the other. "Now all we need is just one last push." On that last word, Black Rutile then spawned a chess piece resembling Jasper that she put squarely in the middle of the board.

--

Far from Black Rutile's lair in the woods, Steven and Greg had finally returned home to Beach City after a father-son outing that turned rather disastrous. Fortunately, the Crystal Gems were already home to be told of what happened and as Steven gazed out over the deck, Bismuth asked Greg what happened.

"So Steven just flew off the handle because of a song?" Bismuth asked while helping Greg put his van back together. "Frankly, I could think of weirder reasons to get angry."

"No, it wasn't because of the song." Greg admitted to the blacksmith. "It was because we drove off to my childhood home in Keystone and he learned that my upbringing wasn't too different from his mom's."

"I don't think you ever told anyone about when you were a kid." Bismuth replied.

"Not that I wanted to until now." Greg stated. "But after that crash, I don't think I ever want to bring them up again. Steven started ranting about how he wished the Gems never found Earth and he had a normal human life like I had."

"Whoa whoa whoa, where did all this come from?!" Bismuth yelled in alarm, raising her hands towards the former rock star.

"That's what I said!" Greg exclaimed before turning to his despondent son. "And now that I think about it, maybe he had good reason for those wishes after all he's been through."

Steven looked down in utter shame and regret before he walked back inside the beach house, clearly avoiding a chance to speak with his father about the incident.

--

As soon as Steven got inside, the other Crystal Gems were there to greet him, but the looks on their faces told Steven things weren't going to be good.

"Sit down on the couch Steven, we need to talk." Pearl commanded the son of her deceased lover, who did as he was told before Pearl began pacing around. "I just can't believe you, Steven! Crashing the van with Greg inside?! You know how fragile humans are, young man! These pink outbursts need to be dealt with!"

"It's not an outburst!" Steven yelled, briefly inflating himself as he turned pink.

"See, this is exactly what I'm talking about!" Pearl exclaimed before Steven got back up and started walking away. "What is happening to you?!"

"It's nothing, just puberty, honest!" Steven cried as he struggled to keep his pink form at bay.

"Whoa no little dude, I've seen enough sitcoms to know that is not what puberty is like!" Amethyst declared. "Right, Garnet?"

"I can confirm, this is not regular puberty." Garnet nodded before Steven put up a literal wall between him and his guardians.

"Steven, drop the wall this instant!" Pearl ordered as she pressed against the pink, hexagonal dome.

"I'm sorry Pearl!" Steven gasped in apology before the wall disappeared. "I just need some space, okay? I'll be in my room." But as Steven walked upstairs, Amethyst rushed to keep him from going any further.

"Not so fast, my dude!" Amethyst declared. "You gotta tell us what's going on!"

"It seems like Steven wants to avoid a serious discussion altogether." Garnet analyzed.

"No, I'M NOT!" Steven yelled, dropping to his knees and pounding his fist on the stairs, creating a shockwave that shook the entire room.

"Steven, either you talk to us about what's going on, or you're grounded until you're able to explain." Garnet firmly declared.

"She's right man, you gotta chill!" Amethyst exclaimed.

"We need to do something about this before anyone else gets hurt!" Pearl stated as Steven continued struggling where he stood.

"Don't let these strange powers control you." Garnet tried desperately to calm the half-Gem down. "You're better than this."

"LEAVE ME ALOOONE!" Steven finally roared, causing a pink shockwave to burst from his body and seemingly force the Gems to move in slow motion. Or rather, he was moving faster than everyone else. "I'm speeding up again!" he muttered while gazing at his equally pink hands. "I gotta get out of here!"

Steven ran out of the house and far away from the Crystal Gems. There was barely anywhere he could go right now. Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl kept enabling these strange new powers, yet Peridot, Lapis, and Bismuth probably barely knew what to do about things. Thus, there was only one Gem left he knew could help him in his time of need.

--

"The Gems tried to help me, but they just kept making things worse." Steven explained to Jasper later that night while the two sat around a campfire in front of her cave. "And that's why I refuse to go back."

"So what you're saying is," Jasper answered before dramatically removing the cloak she was wearing. "you want a rematch?!"

"What?! No!" Steven exclaimed. "I just told you why I came here in the first place. I think my Diamond powers are coming out, and I have no idea how to control them. I just want to be alone so I can't hurt anyone or be super toxic and controlling."

"So, you finally admitted it, eh?" Jasper rolled her eyes as she got up and walked away. "If you want to be alone, your definition of it is horribly wrong!"

"But Jasper, this is the last place anyone would look for me!" Steven explained before running after Jasper. "Wait, don't leave me here!" he begged the bigger Gem. "This thing with my powers is the real problem."

"The only problem you have is your friends." Jasper declared, much to Steven's confusion. "Just like how you keep holding everyone back, they're doing the same to you!"

"Are you sure?" Steven asked. "I definitely believe I'm getting them all worried."

"That's because they're afraid of you." Jasper responded. "And not just of your powers, but your control over others. And you are too! You came out here to hide, but I'm not one to hide myself. I don't need to hide my power or try to stifle it, I let everything out by training!"

"Like this forest?" Steven wondered, looking around the patch of destroyed trees he and Jasper have stumbled upon.

"Exactly." Jasper answered, walking up to a tree and making it fall over with a single punch. "And to control that power, I have to use it. Those so-called friends of yours don't understand because they always want to make you feel bad for being yourself!"

"Yeah, I do feel bad." Steven muttered to himself, gazing at his fist before walking over to punch another tree, turning pink as he landed a blow that created massive cracks on the bark and wounded his hand.

"Yeah, crush that weakling tree!" Jasper cheered Steven on.

"No!" Steven exclaimed before kissing the tree to fix the damage he did.

"Are you kidding me?! That's disgusting!" Jasper gagged at the sight when she looked down to discover that Steven's kiss caused some grass to grow around them. "No, the grass!" she yelled and rapidly pulled out the grass beneath her. "Get out of here!" Jasper then angrily turned to Steven and picked him up by the collar of his jacket. "Quit helping this planet's ecosystem and show me! Show me your power!"

Jasper harshly threw Steven to the ground, causing him to groan in pain. "No way Jasper!" Steven coughed as he got up from the toss. "I can handle myself!"

"Shut up!" Jasper yelled and lunged at Steven, who turned pink on reflex and created a barrier to defend himself from the Quartz's ruthless attack, but it proved ineffective as Jasper punched straight through it, causing Steven to fall to the ground. "This is it; this is all you were worried about?! What a rip-off!"

As Steven helped himself off the dirt, Jasper just kept on yelling. "I am way stronger than everyone you hold back and are holding you back in return!" she bellowed while pointing at Steven. "Because I'm not afraid of this, and you shouldn't be either!"

In response, Steven turned pink again and created another shield to launch at his opponent. "Yeah, that's more like it!" Jasper declared eagerly and prepared to defend herself, smashing the shield with just her arm. "Now tell me, was it good to let your anger out that way?"

"Y-yeah." Steven realized how good it felt to vent his rage on someone who could be a match for him, allowing Jasper to let out a loud laugh. "If I stay here, will you teach me how to control all this?"

"I won't teach you until you fight me!" Jasper refused the offer.

"Well, I won't fight you unless you teach me!" Steven replied.

"Ugh, fine!" Jasper groaned in resignation.

"Really?!" Steven smiled as he returned to his normal color.

"Here's lesson number one," Jasper responded. "No smiling."

"But I've seen you smile." Steven pointed out the goofy smile Jasper wore when he agreed to fight her not too long ago.

"Lesson two, shut up!" Jasper yelled before she kicked Steven into the air, and the boy landed far from where she could see him with a thud.

"Guess my training starts now." Steven declared to himself before he heard footsteps behind him and turned around to find who was behind him. "YOU!"

"Training with Jasper, Steven?" Black Rutile snickered disdainfully. "Wow kid, you're not just one Spinel, you're an entire circus of them!"

"What do you want with me now Black Rutile?" Steven asked his new archenemy as Black Rutile's three minions appeared behind her.

"We just came here to talk." Aquamarine answered. "As much as we would love to kidnap you and hold you for ransom, or maybe even kill you right here and now, we think hanging with a brute like her is much more fitting."

"Besides, we all know you'll just drive her away like you did to everyone else." Eyeball laughed. "Or maybe even something worse!"

"Look, what we're trying to say is that you should just give up now and get the help you really need." White Topaz cautioned Steven, unaware of how angry she made her teammates. "We only want what's best for you, so you won't get in the way of my Rutile's plan!"

"Are you seriously trying to help our enemy here?" Black Rutile growled with eyelids lowered at White Topaz. "I thought you were at my beck and call whenever I needed you!"

"If you're trying to ruin my life again, it won't work." Steven firmly declared as he got up to face the four insurgent Gems. "I know what you really are, Black Rutile. You're no hero to Homeworld, you're just a callous bully who will do anything to get her way."

"GROW UP STEVEN, GROW UP!" Black Rutile abruptly yelled at Steven's face. "Sociopath, hypocrite! Refusing to save a dying pet because of the natural order when he refuses to accept everyone is leaving him! Who's the real villain between us two, my boy, hm?"

"Still you." Steven remained resolute against the Rutile.

"You can't even begin to comprehend my current plans." Black Rutile replied just as resolutely. "Soon, everyone on this accursed rock will see you for the monster you truly are."

"Hey, where are you?!" Jasper bellowed from afar, and Black Rutile saw this as her cue to leave.

"Wouldn't want to keep a certain someone waiting." Black Rutile smirked. "But at least the three of us agree the Crystal Gems are the real problem."

"Aw, but I wanna turn Jasper against Steven too!" Eyeball complained. "Plus it would be an honor to see her in person again. The real deal, not an Amethyst shapeshifting into her."

"Oh, shut up, and let's get out of here." Aquamarine slapped her Ruby partner and dragged her away by the hand.

"Hey, no hard feelings kid?" White Topaz asked Steven, causing Black Rutile to slap her mouth shut.

"We'll see each other again Steven." Black Rutile declared. "But until then, I'll be watching you, just like I've always had since our last fight."

As the four rogue Gems left, Steven was left alone with his thoughts once more. And with those thoughts, a certain voice in his head re-emerged. "You know, she does raise a few good points."

"You again!" Steven said to the voice. "What do you want now? Are you another Gem working for Black Rutile?!"

"Well, kind of." The voice answered. "I'm not directly working for her, but it's thanks to her that I'm even speaking to you now. Remember that night while the Gems were out in Los Diego? She helped me grow."

"I thought so." Steven muttered in a moment of clarity. "But please, just leave me alone!"

"Maybe I'll just sit back and watch while you worry your so-called friends sick." The voice laughed deeply. "Don't you worry, we'll be seeing each other again very soon."

With that foreboding goodbye, the voice once again vanished from Steven's thoughts. Was it true, was that voice even haunting Steven because of what Black Rutile said to him? Or could it perhaps be even older than that?

"Are you dead or something?!" Jasper yelled for Steven. "Come back over here if you aren't, we got training to do tomorrow!"

"I'm coming!" Steven cried and raced back to Jasper's cave. As soon as he got there, Jasper threw her cloak at his face. "What was that for?"

"Think you might need this." Jasper stated while peering out from her cave. "Humans need to sleep, right?"

"Aw, you really do care for me." Steven blushed at the seemingly kind gesture, but Jasper just scoffed and retreated into the darkness of her home. Steven then just shrugged and laid down on the ground with the cloak covering him like a blanket, gazing up at the stars and wondering how the Crystal Gems must be doing.

--

The next morning, the Crystal Gems were now searching across Beach City for the missing Steven. Pearl had placed posters all over town while Greg helped Lion and Amethyst sniff around for him, but so far they found nothing that would help them.

"Whoa, easy Amethyst!" Greg yelled as he tugged on the leash of a purple-furred Dalmatian with an amethyst gemstone on her chest, which then turned into an exhausted Amethyst.

"We're getting nowhere with this!" Amethyst complained. "I mean, I learned how he could slow down time through Smoky Quartz, and even I don't have a clue!"

"I hope we find him soon, I'm getting worried." Pearl whimpered before she found Garnet walking up to them. "Anything from Little Homeworld, Garnet?"

"Nothing, Peridot and Lapis told me they didn't see Steven recently." Garnet answered. "However, Zuli said she did see a pink blur zoom past yesterday."

"That's the same one I saw with Bismuth while we were fixing the van!" Greg declared. "Could that be Steven?"

"It probably is." Pearl said before she began to break down into tears and hug Greg tightly. "I miss my baby!"

"We all do Pearl." Greg sniffed and returned the hug, followed by Garnet, Amethyst, and Lion joining in to comfort the Pearl. "We all do."

However, little did the Gems know, Steven was perfectly fine. But not the kind of fine they want him to be.

--

Far off in the woods, Steven had fallen fast asleep underneath the blanket Jasper had lent him. But his rest wouldn't last long as Jasper emerged from her cave and smashed a wall, shocking him awake.

"Rise and shine, your training begins today!" Jasper barked as she walked up to the half-Gem boy and picked him up by the neck. "Now tell me, what are you here for again?"

"Uh, to get a better control of my powers?" Steven answered.

"Not enough energy." Jasper shook her head in disdain. "Why don't we start with the only way you can talk to people?" she suggested and then cleared her throat. "So you're here because of your mother, kid? Well, whoop-de-doo!" the big Quartz began singing while circling Steven. "You still haven't realized more have suffered than just you! If you wanna get tougher kid, here's a tip. I got three little words for you: get a grip!"

"Shouldn't that apply to you too?" Steven asked his new mentor.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Jasper growled while walking towards some boulders and picked one up.

"I mean, you're stuck here because of me." Steven continued, much to Jasper's anger. "Not to mention closets full of-"

"Do you want my help or not?!" Jasper roared.

"Yes ma'am!" Steven nervously complied before Jasper threw him a boulder.

"That's better." Jasper grinned smugly as she hoisted up more boulders on her back and walked away. "Follow me."

--

"You've been through a lot brat, but let me say something about that." Jasper began singing again as Steven followed her up the mountain with boulders in hand. "As a veteran, I've seen far messier, you should've seen the Clash at the Theater."

"I don't think I've heard of that before." Steven stated while setting the boulders down nearby.

"Doesn't matter, just giving an example." Jasper replied as she dropped her boulders too. "Now come on, throw me some shields!" Steven nodded before he turned pink and summoned multiple barriers to unleash on Jasper, who managed to break through all of them. "The fusion's all high and mighty. Amethyst can be pretty flighty. And the Pearl, wow, she's nuts, you see! They all got experience, but none like mine!"

--

"Maybe when you're done, you'll be feeling just fine." The next day, Steven continued training via splitting logs in half on a stump, while Jasper demonstrated her superior strength by knocking down a tree with just a push. In the meantime, Black Rutile whispered something into Jasper's ear without her knowing the Rutile was even there.

--

"If you wanna get tougher kid, here's a tip." As night began to fall, Jasper challenged Steven to a race, her spin-dash against his pink form's speed. "I got three little words for you: get a grip! Ya hear me!"

"Yeah, those three little words are 'Get a Grip!'" Steven joined in on the song as he began catching up to Jasper.

"Now we're talking!" Jasper cheered triumphantly.

--

"No time for healing!" As the training went on to the day after that, Steven had grown slightly taller and more muscular, and even began growing a beard as he threw another barrier at Jasper. "Who needs feeling?!"

--

"You're still reeling?" Steven caught a fish in the river with a more polygonal bubble that he cooked up to eat, while Black Rutile loomed behind him with another lie to tell him. "Well, my tips are quite appealing! Let's say it again!"

--

"If you wanna get tougher kid, here's a tip." Steven and Jasper harmonized while clashing fists in a forest clearing. "I got three little words for you: get a grip!"

"Yes, for everything to go as planned, get a grip." Black Rutile muttered while watching the two train with an evil smile, eager to see how far Steven has come and how far he'll fall.

--

The next day, thunder began rumbling far from Steven, who knelt in front of a campfire with a more muscular body that made him as tall as Jasper and a wildly different hairstyle.

"I found more rocks!" Jasper called out to her student while tossing over some more rocks for him to train with. "You won't believe how hard it is to find a good rock around here, especially since we broke most of them."

"I'm done with rocks Jasper." Steven declared while getting up to face Jasper. "I'm finally ready. For our rematch." He then put out the fire behind him with one stomp, showing the other Gem how serious he was.

"Took you long enough!" Jasper cackled as she cracked her knuckles and prepared for her long-awaited round 2. "Then come on, show me what you got!"

Steven responded by creating another hexagonal shield to launch at Jasper. However, Jasper jumped over the shield and attempted to punch Steven, but suddenly, she got punched instead. As Steven let out a gasp, Jasper summoned her horned crash helmet and slammed it into Steven's head, sending him tumbling backwards into the ground.

"What are you holding back for Steven?!" Jasper yelled while the resulting smoke began to clear. "You think you can't take it, that I'm just going to coddle you the whole way through, just like the Gems?! You still want to go back to them?"

"No!" Steven coughed from the smoke.

"You still afraid to be strong?!" Jasper continued taunting her foe. "Are you dull?! ARE YOU PITIFUL?!"

"I AM NOT!" Steven bellowed out loud, causing a shockwave that knocked Jasper back, and nearly shook a certain Rutile from a tree she was hiding in as he lunged at Jasper with fury in his eyes.

"Is that all?!" Jasper cackled arrogantly, forcing Steven to create more barriers to strike at her with, which finally landed a hit on Jasper and slammed her into a tree. "That's more like it!"

Steven let out a sadistic giggle before he lunged again, far faster than normal as he started repeatedly punching Jasper while the two soared through the forest and into the air.

"Come on, come on!" Jasper beckoned Steven as their brawl took to the skies. "Show your master what you can really do!"

Steven's maniacal laughter grew louder and louder with each punch before kicking Jasper to the ground. "You were right Jasper!" he declared while summoning more shields to trap Jasper with before forming an even larger one in front of him. "I HAVE BEEN HOLDING BACK!"

With a murderous smile and white diamonds in his eyes, Steven made his barrier grow razor-sharp spikes before launching it at his captive opponent. And for the first time in what felt like ages, as the spiked shield rocketed towards her, Jasper felt one emotion that she barely showed to anyone else.

Pure, unadulterated terror.

What had she done?

--

The cloudy skies gave way to a loud thunderstorm as Black Rutile climbed up to the top of another tree to watch the outcome of the fight, and she was more than happy with what she was seeing.

"Bravo Steven, I never knew you had it in you!" Black Rutile clapped loud enough for Steven to hear as he returned to his senses to realize what he had just done. "If I hadn't planned for that, she would've made a great bodyguard!"

With tears and raindrops staining his face, Steven hid whatever he was hiding in his balled-up fist while glaring at Black Rutile before he raced back to Jasper's cave. When Black Rutile decided to climb down the tree, she was greeted by the nervous look on her Topaz's face. "So, who were you betting on to win?"

"I was betting on Steven to curb his problems more healthily, and you just kept stringing him along!" White Topaz accused her superior, but her accusations were shut down by a bowie knife pointed straight at her face. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! Would a shadow puppet make you feel better?!"

"No need." Black Rutile frowned, hiding behind the tree to watch as Steven, now wearing his jacket again, hid his fist in one of the pockets while running out of the woods. "Nothing makes me happier than seeing him squirm."

"Oh yeah, it's funny how pathetic he is." White Topaz laughed nervously in agreement. "Come on, let's head back to the cave. Don't wanna get wet."

"Indeed," Black Rutile agreed and strolled back to their lair with her arms behind her back. "wouldn't want anyone knowing what we did to him."

--

"I sent so many messages, but he hasn't replied!" Pearl fretted while pacing around the beach house as the storm continued. "Do you think he even had his phone when he ran away?! What if something horrible happened and it's all our fault because he wanted to stay away from us?! What if-" Pearl's panicking soon turned to hyperventilating as she curled up into a ball on the floor and began rocking back and forth when Amethyst stepped in to calm her down.

"Pearl, chill out!" Amethyst literally shook Pearl out of her traumatized state and picked her up off the floor. "Panting and sweating over everything won't bring Steven back! It's not like he's going to just barge in as soon as I finish talking!"

Just then, Steven finally returned home, much to the Crystal Gems' delight and worry. However, he had no time to tell them where he's been as he gunned for the bathroom.

"Steven, where have you been?!" Pearl cried out in fright for her surrogate son.

"No time to talk!" Steven exclaimed before ducking into the bathroom.

"Seriously man, we've been looking everywhere!" Amethyst added just as the door closed in front of her. "Hey, what was that in your hand?"

"Nothing important!" Steven replied, peeking out the door one last time before going back.

"The way he said that makes me get a bad feeling about this." Garnet declared ominously.

--

'This has been a horrible day.' Steven thought to himself while filling up the bathtub and snatching the three Diamond essence bottles from the mirror, taking a moment to find a dark shadow in the exact shape of his muscular self from earlier standing behind his reflection.

"I never knew you had it in you either." The shadow growled before Steven turned to dump all the Diamonds' essences in the bathwater and pulled his fist out of his pocket, unfolding it to reveal Jasper's shattered remains in his palms.

"Please work, you gotta work!" Steven muttered in total panic while piecing Jasper's broken gemstone the best he could and submerging it in the water. "Please Jasper, I'm sorry!" he began sobbing for the deceased Gem, his hot tears streaking against his face and dropping into the water.

"I'm sorry."

END OF PART 3: FRAGMENTED MIND

TO BE CONCLUDED IN PART 4: WE WILL ALWAYS BE YOUR FAMILY

--

Wow. Great googly moogly, it's all gone to shit, just the kind of shit that Black Rutile likes. Is Jasper truly gone? Okay, definitely not since next chapter after the break will be Homeworld Bound. Has Black Rutile won? Maybe. Will the voice in Steven's head take the wheel? Who knows? Find out on the epic final part of Steven Universe: Alternate Future, to perhaps begin after the usual two-month hiatus. Or maybe I should go for a shorter hiatus this time. Or maybe longer? What do you guys think? I mean, by the time I publish this, I'll be getting ready for sophomore year of college so my time will most definitely be filled up. But regardless, there are now only eight chapters left of laughs, tears and adrenaline rush, so don't even try to miss the next arc! Okay, peace!

[high-functioning-lokipath]

SH - Songfic! One-sided!John x Reader, Sherlock x reader - Someone Like You - Word Count: (including lyrics) 1,278

I heard that you're settled down

That you found a girl and you're married now

I heard that your dreams came true

Guess she gave you things, I didn't give to you

"Hi John! It's Y/N! How're you?" You'd lost contact with your best friend/crush after he went to war. You knew he'd survived because you may have scoured the internet for anything on him and found his blog with info on where he lived now. You lived in America now and simply didn't have the money to travel there. It took you a long time though to track down his number. Even so, it took you years to work up the nerve to call. Once you did, and once you started catching up, you almost wished you'd left the memory as it was.

Old friend, why are you so shy?

Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light

It took him hours on the phone to finally admit that he'd gotten engaged. The wedding was in a few months. He asked if you wanted to come but you said you'd never have the money and not to worry. He seemed happier than ever being in a relationship but he didn't seem to want to talk about it with you. You finally said your goodbyes and you cried yourself to sleep.

I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it

London. You never thought you'd be back here. It smelled right. It felt right. But you were scared. John had told you where he lived. But you decided to go meet his famous ex-flatmate first. Sherlock liked you. He actually approved of you. Of that you were both glad and flattered. You loved John. Sherlock was nice but you hadn't felt the spark you had with John. Maybe you just didn't want to. The one thing that did draw you closer together was that you both were dealing with the inescapable and quickly approaching loss of John.

I had hoped you'd see my face

And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

John knew. He'd always known. He loved you too when you were younger. But ever since he came back from Afghanistan, he was scared. Scared to see you and fall back in love. He didn't want to burden you with the broken man he'd become.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

He found Mary and couldn't believe it. He actually loved her. She had helped him immensely and changed his life. She reminded him of you in some ways. But he realized he had moved on.

"Don't forget me, " I beg

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

He still thought of you. When you called he was happy to hear from you. But he just didn't love you anymore. You realized you'd waited too long. You had been too scared and he hadn't been able to wait for you.

You know how the time flies

Only yesterday was the time of our lives

We were born and raised in a summer haze

Bound by the surprise of our glory days

Growing up, John and you had been inseparable. School, weekends, summer vacations, graduation; you did everything together. You couldn't imagine living without him.

I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it

I had hoped you'd see my face

And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

Somehow, John still didn't know you were in London. It had been months since you arrived. Sherlock invited you to stay with him at 221B and you accepted. You helped Sherlock with his best man speech and he begged you to come with him to the wedding. You hesitantly accepted after much convincing.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

If only you could have recorded John's surprise when he saw you arrive early with Sherlock. You took your seat of course, since Sherlock had Janine to walk in with but it was actually kind of fun to watch the preparation. As you watched them run around making last minute adjustments, you found yourself watching Sherlock, not John. Sherlock was quite the man. Tall, handsome, kind in his own way, and helpful to his true friends. Your spirits began to lift and you could almost feel your heart letting go of John.

"Don't forget me, " I begged

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

It still hurt watching the vows and you knew you'd never forget your love for John but you had a newfound joy. Sherlock had been quite nice and friendly with you over the past few months. You'd learned to read him fairly well and perhaps he liked you. Maybe this relationship would be the one to last. But you knew you couldn't wait too long.

Nothing compares, no worries or cares

Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made

Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

At the reception, Sherlock introduced you to Greg, Molly, and Tom. You knew Mrs. Hudson of course. You sat with them and watched as Sherlock delivered his speech. After Sherlock played his special waltz for John and Mary, you saw him wandering a little.

"Sherlock!" You called out, seeing him head for the door. "Leaving so soon?"

"I, um, I'm not really needed here any longer. I was just going to-"

"I need you." He looked at you quizily. "To dance with me and keep me company. Please Sherlock?"

"Alright," He replied. You headed back to the dance floor together. He put one hand on your waist and took your other hand in his. Midway through the song you closed your eyes, enjoying the moment. You sighed contentedly. "Are you alright?"

"Quite."

"I am," He paused for a moment "I am pleased you're feeling well considering, erm," he cut himself off, not wanting to address the matter directly.

"I've found someone new," you replied simply.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you

"Don't forget me, " I beg

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

"Are you sure you want to pursue this?"

"Yes, Sherlock. I've thought it over all day."

"Only today? I don't think you know what you're getting into."

"Trust me, Sherlock."

"Ok, I suppose we could try," he replied. A small smile was playing on the corners of his lips.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

"Don't forget me, " I begged

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

"So, you and Sherlock, huh?" John asked. His feelings were obviously mixed. Slightly jealous but happy for you both.

"Yep," Sherlock replied for you, popping the P.

"Well, I wish you the best," John replied whole-heartedly.

"I wish you and Mary the best as well, John." You gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thank you."

"For what? I'm the one who broke your heart," he said guiltily.

"If it wasn't for you, I'd have never met the love of my life." He smiled. "You may want to start writing your best man speech, John," You joked. "I don't see this relationship fading at all. This one's built to last."