#if there wasn’t a history and pattern with these kinds of ‘jokes’ with him I might join the ‘he’s hacked he’s innocent’ camp but well….

[drunkeddiediaz]

You can block me or whatever I’m gonna keep the same energy I had for both Edy and him until proven otherwise.

[awriternamedart]

One of the many things Akira noticed about Sakamato Ryuji was just how quietly he loved.

He didn’t mean specifically in a romantic sense. Friends, family, strangers- the way Ryuji showed his care and affection was almost silent.

It had first made itself apparent when Akira learned that Ryuji’s bright, yellow blonde wasn’t his natural tone- it was in fact, a bleach job he kept up on. He had noticed that Ryuji’s roots were growing in- a dark brown color that stood out starkly- and made an idle comment on it, drawing a fidgeting Ryuji’s hand to his thick, unruly hair.

“Oh, yeah. Been savin’ up to get some more bleach ‘n toner ‘n shit soon- ain’t let it grow out this long in a while.”

“You bleach it?”

“Yeah, started doin it round secondary and just- never stopped, I guess.”

He had later found out that he had done it so that Ann wouldn’t be alone as the only blonde, and even though they had fallen out over the years, he had still kept up with it. And considering the price of that kind of bleach job, the fact that he was always reminded to dye it back- it wasn’t an easy endeavor to keep up with.

And yet, he did so without even a thought of stopping.

It really had caught Akira’s eye when Yusuke had joined their little group.

For the first time, Akira got to witness Ryuji get along with someone from the beginning- and it wasn’t exactly easy. Ryuji, for all his sunny grins, had more than a few walls up when it came to new people. He got to see a gruffer, more agitated Ryuji- and also got to witness him slowly lower that outward mask to let their teammate in.

When Akira caught Ryuji suddenly always having a pencil on hand, he had known Yusuke had his seal of approval.

This type of pattern just kept repeating itself, mostly. With Makoto it was… a little more difficult- but that was because they had a history by ear. Ryuji’s reputation was the stark opposite of Makoto’s so there was bound to be friction- but Ryuji wasted no time in trying to help her anyway.

Even if Akira would forever shiver at the memory of Ryuji throwing himself in front of a moving car.

From there- Futaba, Haru, even Morgana, Sae, Sojiro and Kasumi on the off chance of meeting her- Ryuji would always have a special way that he loved. That he cared.

Something even Ryuji himself hadn’t seemed aware of when Akira first brang it up.

“Eh? Whaddya mean?”

“The pencil in your pocket. It's for Yusuke, isn't it?” Akira prodded, a nonchalant question more than anything. The quiet tenor of his voice carried a much lighter lilt to it now that they had taken down Shido.

“How'd you know I got a pencil- well, dudes always mumblin ‘bout drawin this or that.” Ryuji offhandedly waved, leaning back onto the comforter atop Akira’s mishmash assembly of a bed. “ ‘s easier to shut him up with it."

“Haru never running out of soil or fertilizer?”

“The bags aren’t that heavy- sides, it ain't like I got anythin’ else to do after school, ‘less ‘m hangin’ out with you.”

“Morgana’s treat pocket in your bag?”

“Keeps him from yowlin’ at me.”

“Futaba’s ever growing manga collection?”

“They were just gonna rot in my room.”

“Makoto mentioned that her notes are always nice and neat whenever she gets them back from you.”

“Well, duh, they aint mine. Gotta keep them in nice condition.”

“Your hair?”

“What about it?”

Akira just rolled his eyes. This guy was impossible- so silence fell over the pair in the quiet room overlooking the backstreets. Wood creaked nearby, a quiet snapping noise that neither paid much attention to.

There was more Akira could have gone into to- the dishes when Sojiro was out and Ryuji was hangin around, Akira catching him looking up gymnastics specifics one evening- hell, Ryuji had even begun to look through how to properly play billiards before.. yeah.

For all the shit Ryuji was dragged through, the butt of the joke, the beaten up punch line- he never stopped caring. Akira couldnt help but be proud of his choice in a loyal right hand.

“Uh oh.”

“Hm?"

“Ya got that look on yer face.” Ryuji leaned forward, a smirk rising on his face. “That stupid calculatin look like your takin a shadow apart with your mind.”

“I have no idea what you mean.”

The repressed smirk said it all to Ryuji, the way grey glinted behind faux glasses- Akira had all but two seconds before an arm was slung over his shoulder, gasping as he was tugged down and a hand was playfully ruffling with his hair. Laughter erupted, Ryuji’s demands that he tell him whats going on in his head almost lost to the tussle.

“Cmon, ‘Kira- you cant hide nothin from me!”

“Unfortunately.” Glasses knocked askew, Akira straighted up, going to fix them before they were snatched off his face. “Hey-!”

Ryuji just grinned back, shark teeth and all.

“So, gonna tell me or do I gotta hold these hostage?”

And Akira just rolled his eyes, easily snatching back his glasses and slipping them on his face. He looked back to Ryuji to see brown shining back, amber flecks dancing in the setting sun. Straw gold hair caught the few orange rays that managed to worm their way into the backstreets of Yongen-Jaya, freshly touched up blonde roots barely visible through the thicket of mismatched cut hair.

He felt himself just shake his head, melting easily to his partner in crime who just blinked- looking at Akira in slight confusion.

“Dude, you sure you're good?"

Neither of them were PDA people- maybe thats why it was easy for them to just exist around each other like they did. But for the rare moments- the quiet touch of their lips, the stolen moments they had, hands hesitantly bumping against the others- Akira knew.

For all the ways Ryuji loved, this was the way Akira liked the most.

-

The Quiet Way He Cares - awriternamedart

[stvharrngton]

a lesson in romantics; lesson one

summary: a multi-part series where reader is the new art teacher at hawkins high and the history teacher, mr. harrington, takes a shine to the new girl. mutual pining ensues on their road to love 🥀

a/n: so here's the first part to the series! i hope you all enjoy <3 it takes place in the early 90s where steve and reader are in their mid-late twenties. disclaimer: i have very limited knowledge on the american school systems or how they work lmao so i'm sorry if it comes across as british-y sometimes but i'll do my best to be as authentic as possible :^) also special shoutout to @inkluvs who originally gave me this idea 1635272 years ago and @onceuponaoneshot who inspired me to actually start writing it hehe

characters: steve harrington x fem!reader, robin buckley

word count: 1.3k

warnings: none, just some introductory stuff, steve being a flirt

taglist: @inkluvs @dukesmebby @sweetbabygirlsworld @kennedy-brooke

SERIES MASTERLIST

HAWKINS, FALL, 1992

September. Fall semester.

A new town. A new school.

Hawkins’ newest resident and Hawkins High newest teacher. You’d spent the last month settling into your new home - a small apartment, nothing extravagant but it was enough for you.

You looked forward to the new start, to get back into the classroom. You loved to teach but the prospect of a new bunch of kids always made you a little nervous.

Making your way into the teacher’s lounge, you quietly said your hello’s to the fellow teachers you had met at orientation a couple days earlier. You silently went about making your morning coffee when a bickering pair burst through the door, a petite girl with a dirty blonde bob who you vaguely recognised as the music teacher and a taller guy, with pretty brown hair and a patterned tie slung around his neck.

You caught his eye as you turned to see the source of the disturbance, a soft but cheeky smile donning his lips. He struggled to keep up whatever conversation he was having with the girl he strolled in with as he finally tore his eyes away from you. 

The blonde followed his eyeline to you, she smirked followed by a roll of her eyes. She swatted your mystery co-worker on the chest, followed by a hushed, “Steve! Are you even listening to me?”

He wasn’t. She knew he wasn’t. But at least your mystery co-worker had a name now. 

Steve. It suited him.

“You’re such a boy.” She groaned, waving him off before going off the mingle with some of the other teachers.

Steve responded with a laugh as he swanned his way over to the kitchenette where you were stood. “First day?” he asked calmly as he grabbed his regular mug from the cupboard above your head.

“Oh, uh, yeah—“ you stammered, caught a little off guard. 

“Shit,” he muttered under his breath, “I never even introduced myself. I’m Mr. Harrington. History.” He said with much more candor, holding his hand out for you to shake.

You accepted the hand shake, making a mental note at how much bigger his hand was than yours. “I teach art.” You said, after telling him your own name, “Am I supposed to call you Mr. Harrington, then?”

Any confidence and swagger he was sporting crumbled, his cheeks flushed with a pink tinge, “I’m such an idiot,” he confessed with a chuckle, fingers combing through that pretty brunette hair, “I’m Steve. You can call me Steve.”

“Nice to meet you, Steve.” You grinned, a toothy smile that made Steve’s heart thump in his chest. A smile he would be thinking about for days to come.

“Well, I better get going. Minds of the youth to shape and all that but I’ll see you around, yeah?” Steve said, grabbing his coffee cup as he gestured to the door that led to the school halls. 

“Sure,” you nodded, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, grabbing your own warm flask. You couldn’t help but let your tummy go all fuzzy at Steve’s kindness, a smile creeping its way onto your lips.

“Have a good first day, newbie.” Steve joked with a wink before he called out to his friend as he walked out the door, “Buckley! Are you coming or what?”

~

“You’re crushing on the new art teacher, aren’t you?” Robin blurted out.

Steve cursed his best friend under his breath, thanking whatever God was up there that school was yet to start and the hallways were empty. 

“I’m in my late twenties Robin, I don’t get crushes.” Steve waved her off, “I mean, sure, she’s pretty cute but besides, we’ve only exchanged two sentences.”

“Oh, come on, Harrington!” Robin chortled, hand on her stomach as she bellowed in the hallway, “That has never stopped you before.”

“Now you’re just being ridiculous,” Steve hushed the girl with a roll of his eyes, “anyway, why didn’t you say hi to her? Not very nice of you, Buckley.” 

Steve desperately tried to get the attention off of himself, his free hand perched on his hip as he brought his mug of coffee to his lips. His eyes narrowed at Robin over the rim. Like always though, it never worked. His friend far too persistent for his liking.

“Because, dingus,” her tone exasperated now, “I met her at orientation. You know, the thing you didn’t bother showing up for?”

They arrived at the door to Steve’s classroom which was one block over from Robin’s. He groaned audibly at Robin’s comment, “Come on, Robs! I told you I had a migraine,” he muttered as he fished his keys from his pocket, “you know, years of head trauma takes a toll on the ol’ noggin.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she began to turn on her heel to make her way to her own classroom, “it was your loss anyway, Stevie,” Robin teased, a playful undertone to her voice, “‘cause she looked way cuter the other day.”

Steve scoffed at the younger girl, simply not giving her a response, before he closed his classroom door behind him. He slumped in his desk chair as he wondered to himself how he was going to get through the day without his thoughts trailing to you and your smile.

~

You’d never been so glad to hear the bell ring in your life. You enjoyed your first day, sure, but it was a little overwhelming to say the least. A lot of new faces and names to learn and remember, a thick new syllabus you had to preach to these kids.

A sigh of relief fell from your lips as you gathered your things and locked your classroom door behind you. As you made your way towards the teachers parking lot, you dug through your purse for your car keys as you fell face first into someone’s firm body.

It was like a scene out of a movie. The papers and books that were clutched in your arms went flying across the hallway, your purse and the contents of it spilled all over the floor. A total cliche. 

A string of curses tumbled from your lips as you apologised over and over to whoever it was you bumped into. You both knelt to the ground to gather your things when you finally looked into the eyes of who it was.

A pretty set of brown eyes were staring back at you with a coy smile on the lips of their owner. You could only laugh back at him.

Of course it was Steve. 

“I’m sorry,” you giggled, scooping up the stray papers, “I’m a total klutz.”

“Don’t sweat it,” he reassured you, handing you back what he had gathered of yours, “I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“Right.” You nodded.

You stood back up, papers and car keys safely in hand now. Steve placed his hand on your shoulder, giving you a light squeeze, “You good?”

Plunging the butterflies in your stomach back down to their depths, you squeaked out a reply, “Yeah, yes. Thank you for not getting mad at me.” 

“You kidding?” Steve asked all shocked, tone light and playful, “Can’t get mad at the new girl on her first day. That wouldn’t be very ‘nice and welcoming co-worker’ of me, would it?”

You giggled as you nodded, eyes darting to the floor, unable to meet Steve’s inviting gaze. You gestured to the nearby door with your car keys in hand, “Well, I better get going.”

“Oh! Right, yeah, of course—“ Steve stuttered, waving you off as you made your way to the door, “Hey! A bunch of us get together at a bar downtown after the first Friday of the semester if you wanna join us?”

“Oh, um,” you pondered, “I guess that could be fun.”

“Great,” Steve spoke, “I’ll get you the address. See you tomorrow?”

You nodded as you felt a blush creep on your cheeks. It wasn’t a date. It was not a date, you knew that, but you couldn’t help but wonder what Mr. Harrington would look like in casual clothes.

“You betcha.”

[pokegalla]

Hi! Is it alright if I request any of the brothers with a S/O that looks like she just came out the 70s? Like there room is styled, all their clothes they even have old gaming consoles and phones? Like every week they just go thrifting or to a vintage shop to pick up some things? Thank you!☺️

Sorry for the late response! I closed requests and lost all motivation in writing for awhile but I has finally at least returned to finish the writing I owe! You and a few others are getting your requests done!

Any Skellie bros with a 70’s style S/O

Lust:

* Omg he loooooooves your outfits and accessories. I always thought this guy loves fashion and he is loving your style! The colors, the patterns, the designs! What’s not to love? Give him some pointers and he’ll be styling with you!

* Your room definitely surprised him. It was the definition of groovy! He’s definitely digging the peace signs and colors. It’s so pretty! When you show him your phone and gaming consoles, he was pretty intrigued. There was so much cool stuff in the 70’s….

* He’s definitely tagging along with you to the thrift shop man- he’ll be paying for you sometimes. He enjoys seeing your smile when you get new stuff to add to your collection. He’ll even find some new outfits for himself!

Poplar:

* You caught his eye pretty fast with your outfits. He’s pretty knowledgeable so he knows a bit about the 70’s. He thinks you’ve nailed the looks from back then and look amazing!

* He is INCREDIBLY impressed by your room. You had so many nicknacks and collectables in your room. Not to mention the atmosphere: it captures the vibe perfectly! He is definitely excited to check out the gaming consoles and your phone while giving you insight on the history of the 70’s. (He may or may not studied more for you ☺️)

* His eyes were shining when you took him to the antique store. He was looking everywhere, saying bits of information as he examined everything that catches his eye socket. He does get a little embarrassed when he talks too much….but if you tell him you like hearing him talk, it’ll make his soul flutter~

Red:

* Your style to him is well, pretty much opposites. He jokes that you look like a hippie (but he be bullshitting because he DOES find you adorable in your little outfits). One time you made him try on an outfit. He hated it. (He actually kind of liked how comfortable it was but didn’t want to admit it-)

* Your room was….kind of cool. He really likes the lava lamps. He calls them weird but he likes how it glows and moves. You knoooooooow he’s already loving those games you got. He tries acting nonchalant but you sometimes can’t get him off it! Really wants to replace your phone….or buy you a new one.

* Usually you end up dragging him to the antique store. Like you guys go to a mall for one thing. You drag him to the antique store for more things. He’d be pissed….until he sees how happy you look. Damn your cuteness-

Papyrus:

* I think he would be very interested in your outfits! Since he does notice your outfits is much more different then other humans. You tell him a bit about 70’s fashion and he’s already super excited to learn more from you.

* He is literally jumping all over the place in excitement, questioning and examining everything! He loves trying out the games and your neat little phone! He could stay in your room for a whole day if he wasn’t so busy! Makes frequent visits!

* First time taking him to the antique store, he thought it was a wonderland trapped within time. There were so many trinkets and thingies and whatchamacallits! He would be very curious about all the stuff and enjoy his time with you! After all, you looked so happy finding new things to collect! He thinks that was the best part of the trip.

[cuckoo-on-a-string]

Teaser for in-development Zemo fic

Heike has feelings about her husband's second soulmark, and she won't let him feel differently.

A/N: SHAMELESS serotonin fishing as I tumble headlong towards the new year and work on updates for all the other fics. Please do leave thoughts and comments so I can wave them in my muse's face to convince her we aren't half as shitty as we think we are.

Soulmate AU

His second soulmark appeared when he and Heike were still newlyweds. He woke to find the stamp of destiny on his arm with a slow, sick horror that soured his stomach as his young, beautiful, strong wife rolled over and saw it, too. He stared with wide eyes, stuttering, assuring her he would never betray her, that it was some kind of mistake.

She shushed him, stroking the pattern that looked just a little too much like the Zemo family crest to bloom on some stranger’s skin, and drew her hand back across his bare chest.

“It might’ve concerned me,” she murmured, “if not for this.” Her palm covered the mark on the right side of his chest, the imprint of curling lines he believed mimicked their initials.

His wife wriggled a little closer, pulling herself to lay over him so the matching marks touched, and his broken little sigh came out as a whimper.

“I’m not afraid of losing you, Helmut,” she said. “There’s just more to you than either of us realize yet.”

Everything she said was perfect. Everything she did. His perfect, intelligent, loving bride with her head for diplomacy and heart full of mischief. She only gave him a few days to settle into the idea of his new mark before she began her assault. He still did a double-take when he caught his reflection early in the morning after a shower, and despite Heike’s ready acceptance, he felt like he’d been branded for infidelity.

In the middle of breakfast, his wife had a thought and started laughing too hard to speak. He waited for the joke, echoing her infectious amusement before he knew the punchline, and when she could, she said, “You are going to have a – what do they call it? – a sugar baby!” She howled as his grin melted into a bemused frown.

“A what?”

She pointed to his arm, where the covered soulmark lingered.

“Your soulmate has just been born, Helmut. You’ll be a sugar daddy.”

More offended than anything else, he shoved away the vision of a curvaceous blond in a clingy dress with a mouthful of bubblegum. He could not imagine any lifetime where he’d share himself as wholly with such a creature as he did his first soulmate, his true soulmate. He shuddered. Were there doctors for these things? Perhaps he could have it removed. He couldn’t be the first man to discover an unwelcome and inconvenient mark. History bled with such stories.

Armed with a new weapon with which to tease and pry, Heike fell in love with his mark long before he accepted it.

“I will never love anyone the way I love you,” he’d insisted. “I would die for you.”

“Of course not, but you will love our children.” She barely waited for him to nod before she pushed ahead in her crusade. “You love your father. Will you love them less than you love me? You’d die for any of us.”

“It is not the same.”

“I should hope you feel differently about your soulmates than you do your father or children, yes.”

“That is not what I meant.” But she had given him an idea. Though rare, not all soulmates had romantic relationships. And there was the age difference to consider. “Perhaps we will be platonic.”

Heike scoffed. If she were any less of a lady, she would’ve snorted. Running her eyes from the top of his head to the tips of his toes and back again, she left him with a lingering, meaningful look. “Impossible.”

He clung to his hopes of a platonic connection for nearly two decades. But when his soulmate failed to appear as a cherub-faced child he could take under his wing and raise as some kind of adopted Zemo, he had to acknowledge the facts. Despite Heike’s insistence, it wasn’t impossible, and he respected women enough to sustain a relationship without sex even if his soulmate was female, but that may not be what his second soulmate needed. Heike gleefully pointed out he had the appetite to satisfy more than one woman a few times a year, just to remind him she hadn’t forgotten, that she wanted this soulmate in their family. Their place was open and waiting. He only had to find them.

Heike’s favorite game became highlighting newspapers and sending him emails with links to articles about how Millennials – his soulmate’s generation – were destroying a new industry. At breakfast, she’d drop a newspaper over his plate and declare, “Your soulmate is wrecking the diamond industry.”

Another time, she came home, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and announced, “Your soulmate is killing golf,” shoving the proof in his hands as she went to set down her purse.

Once he’d accepted the truth, he joined in the fun. He suggested they buy a potted avocado tree to keep the unknown soulmate fed. Heike encouraged him to drink more coffee and wear scarves.

She marched towards the dream of a brighter future, dragging him along, just as she’d always done. Of course, it only made sense that she’d meet his soulmate before he did.

[indyhypnosis]

Generational Wounds

My family and I flew to Indiana this past week to help my father-in-law pack up his house.

After my wife’s mom passed, my father-in-law, Denny, decided that he could no longer stay in that home, so he sold it and is moving to Florida.

Before we arrived, one of Denny’s friends, since the age of 20, came to give him a head start.

So my son, who’s 15 years old, got to hang out all week with two men in their late 70s, and it was great.

Those two guys are workhorses and always cracking jokes!

They were the first ones up and the last ones to go to bed, and rarely did they stop moving, even though Denny’s friend had two heart attacks over the past few years.

His friend told me, “The doctors say I have a bad heart so they want me to take it easy. I think it’s better that I exercise it.”

And that’s what he did, regardless of what anyone told him.

Their work ethic is something you don’t see as much these days, and they weren’t interested in praise. In fact, they seemed uncomfortable with it.

This was a valuable experience, in spite of how horribly sad it was, because I noticed how many limiting beliefs came out of the post-World War II generation.

I’ve worked incredibly hard to upgrade my mindset, awareness, behaviors, and habits so that I did not remain the kind of person I started out as.

Yet, this last week was like stepping back in time but with all the knowledge of belief patterns I’ve acquired over the years.

For example, the home sale was going smoothly, but if we ever brought it up, the old-timers would sit back in their chairs and, in unison, say, “Oh no, what are you trying to jinx it?”

I learned from Napoleon Hill that you must state what you want for it to happen.

Yet, that generation held the belief that you must keep expectations low so you’re not disappointed when it doesn’t work out.

Frugality was also the golden rule, which is why so many of us have issues with money these days.

The home was on a lake, and the water quality wasn’t that great, so we bought a case of bottled water.

Our dog was thirsty, so my son opened a bottle of water and poured it into a dog dish, and Denny’s friend almost had his third heart attack.

He said, “What’s wrong with the water out of the tap? I’m drinking it.”

When you hang out with as many people as I have, listening to their most painful memories, it becomes obvious why there is so much anxiety and unhappiness today, even when we have more wealth and modern advances than ever before in history.

Generations of limiting beliefs, superstitions, and cautionary tales have been passed through the timelines that caused grandparents, parents, and children to behave in ways that continually sabotage happiness, emotional maturity, and inner peace.

However, we are turning a corner in human history, and the One Belief Away™ Method is going to help millions of people end the cycle of needless emotional suffering for themselves and their families.

Thus, I’m calling for those who have the desire to be a part of this mission to join me by becoming a One Belief Away™ Hypnotist or One Belief Away™ Coach (it’s the same thing, but some people like the word hypnosis and others don’t).

Also, if you are already in the “people-helping” business: therapist, life coach, wellness expert, business consultant, etc., I strongly encourage you to become Certified in my One Belief Away™ Method so I can help you significantly elevate your client’s results while helping you build a more lucrative practice.

I firmly believe the more wealth you create, the more impact you can have, so I’m committed to helping people build 6 and 7-figure practices.

During my Practice Acceleration Master Class, I’ll be sharing what’s working now and how I’ve run a 6 figure practice without spending a dime on advertising over the last few years.

The event is free, online (zoom), and will be packed with inspiring content and tips you can use immediately to grow your business if you already have one.

Even if you’re not in the coaching or counseling profession, you’ll benefit tremendously from attending as I’ll be sharing tips and insights gained from all my experience as a 28-year business owner, Fortune 500 consultant, and working with numerous top-performing industry leaders.

I have 500 people on my list right now who have raised their hand (by clicking on one of my links) over the last year that said they are interested in learning more about my OBA (One Belief Away) Certification.

If one of those people is YOU, make sure to attend the WWN Practice Accelerator Master Class. It will be the first step in preparing you for a journey of a lifetime!

🙂 Tim Shurr, MA

[kisaxiii]

I posted 13,261 times in 2022

18 posts created (0%)

13,243 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thehobbits

@coolerhope

@jinconicc

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I tagged 854 of my posts in 2022

#critical role - 283 posts

#art - 22 posts

#post 2/2 - 22 posts

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Longest Tag: 139 characters

#molly would fight percy and ash and would also try to fuck them. he’s probably flirt with cad but that’s it because he’d respect him as ace

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

No context spoiler for Critical Roll Campaign 3 episode 27

7 notes - Posted July 15, 2022

#4

SONIC SPOILERS DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU HAVE SEEN IT

Me watching Sonic 2 having seen no spoilers: I can’t wait for the post credit scene. Either we’re gonna see shadow or rouge the bat and either way everyone will loose their collective minds

End of the movie: happens

Me:

14 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

#3

I have a theory about Bruno and the “prophecies” from “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”

So we know from the end of the movie that Peppa’s “Prophecy” wasn’t a prophecy, it was just Bruno trying (and failing) to reassure his sister on her wedding day. My theory is that none of the “Prophecies” in the song were actual prophecies.

I saw a Tiktok that said they think the gifts came with more than just the outright obvious gift but more subtle gifts as well. Like Camilo’s shapeshifting also allows him to properly pretend to be someone else, automatically knowing their habits and small things someone wouldn’t notice without having to observe someone. Or Delores having super hearing but also having the ability to fine tune and focus on specific things as well as tune others out and understand everything she is hearing and know what it is (what’s that whirring sound? Oh it’s a fly that’s about 2.4 miles away.) as well as Isabella having a vast knowledge of botany, knowing everything about any plant she grows.

But this is about Bruno, not the rest of the family, so what I think his “extra gift” is is perception. Yes, he can create actual prophecies for anything but I think there are certain things he can just look at, run the math in his head, and be able to give you an accurate prediction without having to go through the whole process. After all, look at his room, it’s clearly set up for a que line, meaning people were lining up to get a prophecy from him, and I can’t imagine how draining it would be to have to do the entire shebang for every person in line. I think most people came in with a question, and he was able to logically give them the outcome after a little questioning, similar to how a fortune teller might but his are more accurate.

We already know that’s kind of what Peppa’s wedding day was, so we can apply this to the other lines as well. “He told me my fish would die, the next day? DEAD!” Her fish was probably sick or not looking too good, so she asked Bruno if he thought the fish would get better, and Bruno, upon observing the fish, probably told her something like “I don’t think your fish will live to see tomorrow unless you get it to a vet.” And all she heard was the first part, and assumed it was hopeless to try and save her fish.

“He told me I’d grow a gut, and just like he said!” This one’s open to a bit more interpretation on how the interaction went, but possibly He approached Bruno while eating and Bruno made a joke saying “You keep eating like that and you’ll have a gut in no time”. Thus making the guy think he was given a prophecy when he did indeed get fat.

“He said that all my hair would disappear now look at my head!” I think this one is honestly just male pattern baldness. Like I think he asked Bruno if his hair would stay or go, and Bruno, knowing his family had a history of MPB, told him it would probably go away, and sure enough, it did.

“He told me that the life of my dreams would be promised and someday be mine. He told me that my powers would grow like the grapes that thrive on the vine!” Isabella’s is a bit more vague than the others, so I think she, as a small child, kept pestering her uncle for a prophecy, and to satisfy her, he told her “one day you will have the life you always dreamed” knowing she was especially favored by Abuela and therefore most likely to get anything and everything she wanted. She probably prodded more, asking about what powers she would get, and he was able to accurately guess similar to how Mirabel predicted Antonio’s gift (she gave him a stuffed animal and said “I know you like animals”). He saw she liked flowers and plants, and told her (in a cryptic way adults do when talking to a kid and trying to be mysterious and fun) “Your power will grow like the grapes that thrive on a vine”

“He told me that the man of my dreams would be just out of reach; betrothed to another!” I actually think Delores’ prophecy was given to her later in life, after Bruno had “left”. We already know she knew he was there the whole time based on her earlier line in the song “I can always hear him sort of muttering and mumbling” and the end of the movie when she confirmed she did indeed know he was there. We also know he was watching his family from inside the walls and keeping watch over them. When Mariano started coming around, I think Bruno noticed Delores’ feeling for him, but also noticed that Abuela was thinking he would be a perfect match for Isabella, and said as much out loud. Maybe not with the intention of telling Delores, but she heard nonetheless, and gave up even trying.

So yeah, I don’t think any of the predictions in the song were actual prophecies as much as self-fulfilling prophecies, where he told someone how something was likely to go, and they made it go that way by thinking it WAS a prophecy.

28 notes - Posted January 4, 2022

#2

Fucking Brutal, Tiki.

52 notes - Posted October 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I am genuinely shocked I have t seen a gif set of the chase scene where Scanlan get’s tentacled lmao. That scene had me crying laughing I can’t believe they put that in the show

55 notes - Posted February 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ms0milk]

smooth runs the water ...

| Sanemi x reader

a/n: i've gotten lots of Sanemi requests recently and i've decided to combine a few of them that fit well together into a short fic collection! for this chapter: there's nothing like a little nightmare comfort with the wind husband. pls enjoy and thank u for the request~

warnings: trypophobia (a demon described with a pattern of holes on its body), a violent nightmare sequence, a bloody wound, and a little bit of panic.

2.5k <3

“You smell like shit.”

“I got shit on Shinazugawa, what do you want from me?”

Sanemi turned his back to hide how quickly he smiled at that.

The two of you were wrapping up, quite possibly, the worst mission ever assigned. Your frame of reference as a Hashira was slimmer than Sanemi’s, as a rookie yourself, but you were 150% positive this would go down as one of the most regretful casualty-free missions in corps history. The fucking thing shot something gooey out of so many holes. Right til the end.

Sanemi on the other hand would never complain about the content of a mission entrusted to him by master Ubuyashiki, but fighting in his pajamas wasn’t on his list of possible pleasant outcomes for the evening. Neither was being startled awake by a crow, or learning that a powerful demon had been attacking civilians so close to his home unnoticed, or having to wake you up.

Having to wake you up from your spot against his chest. Having to wake you up after you finally trusted him enough to spend the night.

“These demons are getting whack,” you grumbled, trying to squeeze an unidentifiable orange liquid from your hair, “remember when they just tried to eat you?”

He couldn’t stop, he smiled at everything you did. Fuck.

Your month-long “relationship” was not conventional. You’d been sleeping together for weeks, but you’d never even so much as talked about it. Never brought it up in conversation a single time. No knowing glances, no seductive smirks. You kissed him once in training one afternoon, suddenly and messily, and he kissed you back. Again, and again, and again, almost every night since the last full moon. Kissed and fucked and babbled and moaned, then the moon would start to fall and you’d find your clothes, crack a joke, and the spell would break. That or you’d just kiss him goodbye and leave before the stars even got a chance to shine. Something about your own bed being more comfortable.

“Just shut up already and lemme see your injury,” Sanemi snapped, much more affectionately than he meant to.

“They’re shitting goop now and you’re worried about my bumps and bruises?”

Why did you always do that?

“Come here,” he ordered, like you were his shy little apprentice again. Sanemi sheathed his sword and you mimicked him absentmindedly, ready to pack up and sleep.

You’d long since stopped the bleeding to that superficial shoulder wound– Sanemi had been your mentor after all; what was a flesh wound to a wind Tsuguko? But after a year of considerably less concern from the Hashira, you knew this nagging wasn’t out of fear for your physical safety.

You rested a hand on the hilt of your sword and leaned against the pillar’s night-chilled arm, “All this fussing because you’re worried I’m gonna get a little blood on your sheets?” You knew it wasn’t about that either. “What kind of demon slayer would I be if I couldn’t staunch some bleeding, huh?”

He started walking back towards his property the minute you bumped into him, but the mention of his bed kept him from starting a pace you wouldn’t be able to keep up with.

“You’re...coming back, huh?”

“Jeez Sanemi, do I smell that ba–”

He cut you off with a strong tug on your sleeve. Cut you off before you started up with your infernal sarcasm and he forgot exactly how it sounded when you said his name. He pulled you to the spot next to him so that the both of you walked side by side and he made no sounds other than the grinding of his teeth the whole way back. How did you always make him beg?

As you walked beside him the short journey home– to his home– you wondered why you didn’t make him beg more often? You remembered the warmth of his bedding and how soft his skin was even after scarring over so many, many times. Soft especially where the scars overlapped.

As you poked and prodded and stumbled into one another in the dark, you thought about maybe even reaching out to hold his hand. Romance wasn’t exactly what you envisioned when you kissed him all those days ago, so you tried not to flirt, you tried not to linger in presence or touch– tried not to spend the night.

“Watch it,” He grumbled when you tripped over his foot, and tugged again at the sleeve of your haori, white to match his– although you deployed in such a rush that evening that Sanemi cleared the threshold of his property without even putting on a shirt. As the light of civilization came into focus through the trees, he still didn’t let go.

Sanemi was doing a horrible job of hiding how afraid he was that you’d decide to leave again. That you’d leave and when he saw you tomorrow he’d have to start from square one like he always did when you pretended not to remember the way you made each other feel. He was growing impatient and raw from vulnerability, and he was not going to scare you away– or whatever it was that happened when you’d suddenly pack up to go home. He’d keep you warm all night, and if you made it until morning surely the spell would break.

What he didn’t know was that you’d never even fallen asleep that night. That you’d barely even slept peacefully in two years.

“Y/n, just stay here.” He knelt, still fucked out and flushed, beside the door where you were gathering your clothes, “I’ll kiss you again, whatever you want.”

How many hours passed– minutes, maybe, from the time you rolled your eyes and finally took his hand, to reveling in the warmth of being tucked against his chest? Why was he so warm? Why’d you do it? Why’d you agree to stay?

Every now and then he would squeeze your waist with a sleepy arm and you’d panic, worried he knew you were awake. But the hand he used to draw lazy, windy spirals over and over along your back eventually fell limp and his breath went shallow.

Every now and then he’d murmur something airy and unintelligible.

Every now and then he’d shift in his sleep to get comfortable and his unconsciousness would remember your presence in his arms and stop his moving. His limbs must have been numb. His legs must have been cold from all the blankets you hoarded. He didn’t move. Even in his sleep he was too excited to sleep beside you to risk making you uncomfortable.

When the crow came, you pretended not to notice. You only decided to open your eyes when he began to rock you gently awake in his arms. He must have been too distracted to tell how deep your breathing was– how obvious it was you were awake. Distracted by what? Sleep? The crow? Your face? Was it worse thinking about the way you looked to him or was it worse– was it more pathetic– knowing you were too afraid to fall asleep next to him? You, a pillar, too afraid to sleep.

“Y/n? Hey…we have to go…c’mon, we have to go now. I’m sorry.”

How long did you let him whisper sweet things he would never say when you were awake?

How long did you let him stroke your hair?

At least until it was too unreasonable to pretend anyone could sleep through the racket of a crow in their window.

Not long enough to let your daydream put lives in danger.

Not long enough.

Why’d you do it?

“Ne..mi.”

You had every chance to go home after the mission.

Why’d you do it?

Why’d you come back? You couldn’t even last a month. Why’d you go back home with him? How’d he convince you to stay in the first place?

“Sane…mi..”

Was the demon good karma? Was the crow warning you not to be lulled to sleep in the arms of the man you loved? They gave you an escape. You wasted your chance.

Did you fight a demon tonight? Why did it hurt? Were you hurt? Were you warm? Of course the demon wasn’t karma. You were a pillar, of course you did your job. Of course you killed the demon. Of course you came back home. You were hurt. Of course you needed help. Where was Sanemi?

Why did it hurt?

Do your job Y/n, shut up and do your job.

Your shoulder? Are you bleeding? It’s cold. Are you home? It's wet. This must be the forest. Where’s Sanemi?

Do your job. Stop the bleeding.

“Y/n”

The demon broke through the tree line and suddenly you were pulling yourself up out of the dewy grass. Your sword was wrapped to your hand with the remanence of your haori– your white haori to match your master. Why weren’t you strong enough to hold it?

Fuck, what happened? When were you knocked unconscious? You took a second to size up your opponent, oozing orange from every orifice of its hole-filled body. The demon wriggled like a maggot and stood on two long legs, with a rounded head balancing at the very top. It’s body was riddled with those weeping, bleeding holes and you realized it must be the manifestation of rot.

You hadn't killed it. You never came home.

“Y/n!”

You tied your sword to your hand because your shoulder was injured. Right. Your shoulder, stop the bleeding! Your grip strength dwindled with every second, as did your consciousness. How did it hit you? What did it strike you with? Why did you dream of Sanemi?

And then it was suddenly on top of you–

Claws!

Claws and ooze filling another wound. It closed the gap too quickly and struck you clean through– through– through your stomach. Was it always this fast? Could you stop the bleeding? Stop the bleeding! Could you repair your shoulder? Please, you’re going to die! Could you make it back home to–

“Y/n!”

“Fuck!” You gasped and sat up so quickly Sanemi’s face got caught in the crossfire. He held his nose with a holler and stared at you from where he was kneeling.

Fuck. Where–

“Are you okay?!”

“Are you okay?!” You heaved and…heaved and heaved, “Am I…” and heaved, “am…” and heaved, “…where…”

You were in the middle of a splay of sheets and bedding. Against your skin was soft cotton, not grass. You bunched a pillow in your fist, not a sword. Blood stained the two futons underneath you. A hand cupped your face.

“Y/n what happened? What are you fighting?” Blood fell out of Sanemi’s nose like the goddamned tap, but his attention was set so firmly on you he didn’t notice. His head was cocked and his hands busied themselves wiping sweat from your brow and chest. He looked perfectly at home in such a wreck of a bedroom. Surrounded by torn and soiled sheets, staring with those wide intense eyes.

Blink damn you.

“Sanemi I’m so sorry, you’re bleeding everywhere.” He had to stop himself from throwing his head back in laughter. You cupped his face to wipe the blood from his nose out of his mouth, “This is not the kind of foreplay I–”

“Y/n stop!”

You weren’t gasping anymore.

“Stop deflecting, just talk to me.” He stopped his dabbing and snatched up your hands so they’d quit flitting around his face, “Are you okay?” And then he smiled with such concern it made you sick.

“I’m, I’m yeah, I…fine, I’m fine. We should really think of a..a um, a safe wor–”

“No jokes!”

Why was he smiling like that? How did he shout so loudly and look so soft at the same time?

“If–If I..” you murmured while he wiped his face with a pillowcase. He scooted closer to you. “If I don’t laugh about it, Sanemi…Sanemi I’ll just…”

“Try it. Just this once. What’s gonna happen?”

“I’ll…I’ll just…”

His grin relaxed, but didn’t disappear. It got even softer somehow, “You already got blood all over my favorite futon, what else could possibly go wrong?”

You jerked your hands away from his in a panic and clutched the gash in your shoulder. Warm blood soaked between your fingers and you realized the stains on the bedding weren’t from his bloody nose, but your injury from the mission earlier. Did you reopen it in your sleep– did you fall asleep?!

“That’s some pretty shoddy staunching.”

And then you started to cry.

He pressed his forehead against yours and sighed in relief, “Please let me help you.”

“N-Nemi I had such a terrible dream!” You let your face fall against his and wept into your nestled laps. You’d been plagued by nightmares since the start of your time in the corps, but had you ever let yourself cry about them in relief when you awoke?

“Sanemi I– I was alone! I’m sorry I ruined your sheets! I’m sorry I woke you up!”

You held your shoulder tightly to ward off the pain, until his hand took its place. It was impossible not to curl in on yourself. He’d lit a candle before you woke up to find the source of the bleeding and now the sun was starting to rise. It was impossible to hide from him with all that light. It was impossible to go back to sleep and you couldn’t run away.

“You’re safe here you messy fucker.”

You hiccuped softly as he began to wrap the wound in torn sheets. He pulled you into his lap to tie off the temporary bandage and let you linger even after he finished. You sniffled onto his soft, bare shoulder. He nestled into your shaking bloody one.

“Is this why you never spent the night?”

You could hear him speaking in your very bones from how deeply he sank into the crook of your neck. When you caught your breath, you made sure to reply softly against the shell of his ear, the spot where he was so sensitive.

“I never spent the night ‘cos I know how loudly you snore.”

He scoffed in frustration, but held you tighter. You wrapped your legs around his hips and steadied your breath into the warm skin of his bicep. This was better than having to look him in those wide worried eyes. You could talk later.

“I must have been…pretty tired to fall asleep with someone next to me.”

Was it a relief to wake up next to somebody for a change? You yawned as if to answer your own question.

“You sure it’s not just because you’ve got a thing for me?”

You still wanted to run away, but did the thought of staying make your heart clench in fear?

“Y/n? Hey?” Sanemi squeezed your hips. He dragged his fingertips down your back and peered at the world through your hair. A gentle snore escaped your mouth.

Clenching in fear? Nah, not now.

He leaned back a little so that your sleeping body could slump against him and chuckled as the sun finally crested the mountains outside his window. Blood dripped down his chest from his face and your shoulder, but he laid back anyway, determined to let you finally sleep peacefully even if it was bloody and sprawled on top of him. Even if you still smelled like orange goo.

Yeah, you could talk later.

part two >>

[lupically]

#FFF8EA | XIAO. 

genre | fluff

word count | 2233

warning | mention of falling off a moutain​

note | i just have some ideas for xiao...

"the yaksha is fond of you."

madame ping was no stranger to you. the kind old lady roaming around yujing terrace, often seen admiring flowers or brewing a cup of hot tea, was someone you come across every afternoon after school when you head to the censor to make a wish to rex lapis.

the conversation you two have had always been brief, mainly because you were always in a hurry to get to work. she never minded your urgency, blissfully talking about how fast-paced and active young people these days are, and simply being happy that you even stopped to let her hand you some glazed lilies from time to time.

interestingly, though, she stopped giving you glazed lilies after a while and began handing you some pretty qingxin instead.

you never questioned it. it was just flowers. you could live without being gifted only one kind of them for the rest of your life. but after today's incident—after the burning down of your school located just outside the city, as well as what madame ping told you with hearty laughter laced in her voice, you were starting to think the switch to qingxin meant something.

"the yaksha is fond of you."

you tightened your hands around the weak strap of your school bag, made out of bamboo after lots of trials and errors, and you tilted your head with increasingly furrowing brows.

"pardon me, the what is fond of me?"

"the yaksha, my dear."

you stared at her. the corner of your lips was quirking up in confused twitches, and she could see that you were fiddling uncomfortably on your spot because you truly have no idea what she was talking about. it was not because of the history of the yaksha that might have made you feel jittery and out of place, you simply had no idea!

madame ping smiled even harder at your innocent oblivion then. how could you have such ample knowledge of rex lapis and the adepti, but nothing about the yaksha? especially the one with his mark, a jade green glow surrounding you like fireflies, all over your aura?

maybe that was why xiao chose you.

or, at least, it was one of the reasons why he liked you.

it was because you knew nothing of him. you never think about him, you never talk about him, and you would never suspect the string of random good luck and trails of safe travels that have been following you around.

while it must be tearing him down on the inside; the fact that he wasn't being able to approach the one person who made his good deeds a choice rather than an order. it must be plaguing his mind and patience every day.

but, even then, your surprising lack of information about his identity does save him the pressure of being chased down by you.

it saves him the problem of being even further attached to you. it was already pressing on his breaking point when he went out of his way to watch over you, leaving trails of his magic over your mortal soul to keep you safe when he was busy. any further interaction would be disastrous.

logically, he knew he would fall for you, so he was doing preventive measures. he has to keep his chest sealed so his heart wouldn't jump toward you involuntarily; he has to keep his chest sealed so you couldn't see all the mess inside.

"oh, sweet child," madame ping cooed as she walked toward you. she whispered to herself, "you're being protected by an adeptus and you don't even know."

she brought up a qingxin from her pocket, the petals slightly wrinkled from the confined space. she tucked it carefully in the pocket of your shirt before patting the bloomed flower, almost as if she was reminiscing.

"this is his flower," she said.

you hummed, looking down at it. "this is his favorite flower?"

"i'm not sure about his favorite flower, but this is his flower," she replied casually.

you pursed your lips together. well, at least now you knew the qingxin did have something to do with the... yaksha... or whatever.

"madame ping... may i ask–"

"you can find him at qingyun peak," she cut you off calmly. "during the lantern festival. he is always there during the festival. it was for the quiet, he said, that old man."

you shut your mouth, surprised that she knew what you wanted to ask. "uh... qingyun peak... is kind of... a big place..."

"you will find him if he wants to see you," she said. "you can speak his name–xiao. he might not show himself to you, but if you have something to say, he's likely there to listen."

qingyun peak. the lantern festival. the yaksha.

right.

that was how you found yourself bearing the freezing night cold with just a thin shirt and a ragged fabric wrapped and tied around your torso, your hands hurting from grabbing sharp edges and rough rocks, and your anxiety increasing with every jump that not only would the almond tofu in your bag fall, but you would as well.

as opposed to watching xinyan play for the lantern festival, being warm and cozy from the warm city lights and the tasty street food, and maybe even letting go of a lantern yourself after making a wish, you were here. you were alone, climbing mountains for a chance.

all for a random boy madame ping told you about! someone who was supposedly fond of you—if this xiao guy was so fond of you, he would have shown himself the first three times you called his name at the bottom of the mountain!

"fond of me–what a joke," you said through gritted teeth as you hoisted yourself up on a small ledge. "i'm going to kick his ass so hard when i find him."

you let yourself pant for a minute, regaining your stamina as you groggily accessed the higher peaks above you. your eyes squinted in dismay, but something inside you—the curiosity for the truth, as well as the longing for a friend, also the anger for playful revenge—urged you to keep going.

"he better eats the almond tofu i made," you muttered to yourself as you moved closer to the mountain. "i even picked some flowers... for him."

jump after jump, you were close to making it to the second ledge when suddenly, a slime jumped and appeared above you. it looked surprised, mirroring your expression, and as it prepared itself to attack you after seeing your hands move, it stopped when it saw you fumble about in the air before you began to fall further away from itself.

you had let yourself go. out of surprise, and an instinct to grab a weapon, your hands moved away from the edge and you fell.

your mind raced as the wind hit your face, your falling body heavy against the current that desperately tried to take you up from the ledge you just climbed up from. you would surely die from the impact if you drop. even without dropping down to the bottom, you would still suffer from a painful death.

was there something to do? how did this happen, you were doing fine! what should you do, what could you do? you were falling already—what was there to do now? anything, something?

"i–archons–" you heaved with the cold air, your lungs squeezing inside you with fear as tears began to drip out of your eyes.

anything? anybody?

xiao?

"you can speak his name. he might not show himself to you, but if you have something to say, he's likely there to listen."

"xi–" your voice broke for a millisecond when you could see the green grass approaching quickly. you squeezed your eyes shut, and your voice was louder than you have ever allowed it to be.

you called his name, loud and clear.

the first thing you felt was a lightning strike. you opened your eyes at the electric feeling to find a flash of green. it was bright, close and bright, in a way that was blinding. but then the tail broke into gentle fragments as a pair of arms circled your body to catch you from the fall.

one arm went around your waist, the other hand securely tightened itself around the back of your neck to keep it from breaking from the impact of his fast landing.

xiao growled under his breath when his feet struck the ground in a heavy blow. he pushed your head to his shoulder, shielding your face away from the soil that bounced upward as a result.

quietness ensued after a moment of calm. you took the moment to access the situation—you were fine. someone, likely xiao, saved you from the fall. you were fine.

he dropped onto the ground, sitting on the cold grass with your body pressed close to his, when he heard that you began to sob from the accident.

despite feeling awkward and unsure, he kept quiet and let you vent out the post-accident fear so you could slowly bring in the relief that you were still alive. but his quietness was unwelcomed when you suddenly curled your fist and hit him across the shoulder.

"screw you! why didn't you just answer me when i–when i was at the bottom of the moun–mountain! screw you!"

you blamed him and you hit his shoulder repeatedly. your weak fist was nothing compared to the pain he has endured in the past, but your cries cut through him like glass in the most seamless pattern when he realized he was part of the reason why you had to go through that traumatic experience.

if he had just jumped down from the peak when he heard you the first time, this would not have happened.

xiao looked at the empty spot before him. his golden eyes glowed with a softness that has long fallen into the abyss, forever gone and forever abandoned. but he brought it back out now because he cares about you, and he is, ultimately, attached to you, and he loves you.

"you're right," he said, holding you close to him. "i'm sorry."

ever since you discreetly left the almond tofu on the roof of the wangshu inn, your shy figure hunched over in an apologizing manner because you were told that you were giving food to an important, albeit weird, guest, and your blissfully ignorant words of encouragement as you told him to go out and explore the world, to give it a chance so he could find people he would like.

ever since then, he has loved you, in fragile and discreet ways, in unwavering and patient ways, in protective and caring ways.

"i love you, i'm sorry."

you stopped sobbing almost immediately, and he was afraid he might have said the wrong thing.

wasn't it what he was supposed to do? verr told him to speak his mind once. just be truthful with his feelings and nothing could go wrong. was he not supposed to show his affection blatantly, as he would his complaints and opinions?

"that... that is going a little too fast for me, xiao," you joked. "let's settle with appreciating each other for now."

he heard you laugh, causing the weight of his heart to drop, like finding lights in a fog, like seeing the lanterns in the night sky and realizing that there are more people alive with you than you think.

"thank you, for saving me," you said kindly then, your fist long stopped hitting him and was now patting his shoulder.

"always."

“but burning my school down is not the best approach for... whatever it was you were trying to help me with.”

xiao blinked in confusion, then realization hit him. he almost forgot about that! he was, shockingly, dwelling in the prideful fact that because he literally destroyed the building, you would be free of school for the day, and therefore not having to face all the hardships inside the walls he could not venture past. he thought it was the best thing to do, second to beating up everyone, which he politely opposed to.

“i am not sorry about that,” he muttered. “it was what i thought was best.”

he could feel you grin in his embrace. your laughter reverberated in the air, making his magic glow around you both. it was like nothing he has felt before. he wanted to stay like this—in this position where you were engulfed by him, where he could surround you with himself instead of the fireflies of green he has left behind, where he was with you in a way it was entire, in a way he could feel your beating heart against his own.

you are pressing onto his breaking point.

you are going to open him up, see him whole, and renovate his insides to your will. you are going to take his heart from his chest, breaking through his ribcage made feeble from his sheer affection for you, and claim it as your own. you are going to make him love, like sharp knives, like soft breaths, like tragic past, like warm blood, you are going to make him love.

you are pressing onto his breaking point.

and xiao lets you.

because you will be worth the tragedy, you will be worth everything.

[phoenixyfriend]

Anakin and the Jedi Babies: Where There’s a Whill, There’s a Windu

Context: original post, chrono

(Summary of the AU: Disaster lineage got tossed back in time. Anakin stayed 21-ish, but Obi-Wan and Ahsoka got deaged, took new names for time-travel reasons (Ylliben and Sokanth, or Ben and Soka) and have been officially adopted by Anakin.)

----------------------

“You’re attached.”

“You’re just now noticing?”

Master Windu eyes him for a few long moments, and then joins him on the ground. Anakin can’t help but smirk. There’s something gratifying about having respect from the man, in this life.

“The other members of the council are concerned.”

“And you aren’t?”

“I am, but for other reasons,” Windu says.

Anakin doesn’t meet his eyes, doesn’t even respond for a long minute. He just looks out over the Room of a Thousand Fountains, spread out below them like hundreds of jungles pieced together in a jigsaw of flora. It’s been his favorite room in the Temple since he was a child, and it’s always overwhelming.

“Most of them have accepted that you adopted them because of Mandalorian customs, and that you stayed where you were due to the will of the Force,” Windu continues. “But they are… uncomfortable with how blatantly your attachments show.”

“Mandalorians are loud and refuse shame. It rubbed off.”

“You said you would kill for these children.”

“I’m their father. That’s kind of expected.”

Windu’s expression is tired. A little tired of stress, but mostly tired of Anakin’s shit. “You know what I’m trying to get at.”

“Do I?”

“Skywalker.”

“No, I’m serious. I need you to spell this out. I’ve had a million slightly-contradicting lectures on this topic, and I’ve been told pretty clearly that I misinterpreted a solid half of them. If you want a constructive conversation, you can’t be vague. I’m thirty-three years old and a father of two, Master Windu, so yes, I’m attached. What you mean by that word is going to change where this conversation goes.”

It’s gratifying to see the Master actually think it over.

“Ylliben’s tattoos have been causing the most recent stir,” Windu finally says. “They nearly all relate to family, whether new or old, and the symbolism is concerning to those who are already upset about the Mandalorian upbringing. They worry that he’ll remain too tied to people he grew up with, and unable to maintain neutrality in future diplomatic ventures, or at risk of a fall if one of the people he’s seen fit to memorialize is injured or killed. The assume a similar state of mind may be applicable to your daughter and yourself, especially given the off-color jokes about how possessive your children are about each other.”

“They’re worried about emotional immaturity,” Anakin summarizes. He offers a wan, unimpressed grin. “They do realize he’s fourteen, right? Nobody’s emotionally stable at fourteen. The hormones are out of whack.”

“I’m aware,” Windu grinds out. “And I’m aware that your histories, of war and all such things, make your ties much stronger, but you can see why the Council worries, especially those who are wary of the memories your children carry but won’t explain. I’m the only one you’ve told, Skywalker.”

“Plo and Depa know.”

“Plo and Depa aren’t on the council.”

“Yet.”

“Skywalker.”

He relents. “It’s not about Mandalore, Master Windu. It’s about Tatooine.”

Windu lets that sit for a few moments, and then sighs. “I don’t know enough about Tatooine to parse that.”

“Shmi and I are former slaves,” Anakin says, as bluntly as he can. “I was freed at nine, she at eleven, and for all that we are free, we’re not freeborn. We were born slaves, and raised slaves, and we were freed too late to forget that life. The way we think is always going to be affected by the way we grew up. That applies to all sentients, more or less, but it’s… the slave mentality is completely at odds with Jedi teachings, because Jedi teachings can only be taught in a safe environment.”

Windu nods slowly, and says, “That does make sense, but it’s… forgive me, but that’s why we don’t normally take children older than four.”

“From the perspective of teaching cultural values, that makes sense,” Anakin allows. “Teaching a Jedi child that’s cared for with communal resources that they do not need material things to be happy is fine; trying to convince a slave child of the same, someone who grew up being told they do not deserve material things, and that their owner can take anything at any time, including family? I lived that life, trying to adjust to ascetic Jedi values that coincided poorly with slave rules. I know exactly how poorly that transition can go when the person caring for the child doesn’t know how to handle the points of conflict.”

“Do you regret joining the Jedi?” Windu asks.

Anakin shakes his head. “My Jedi master, bless him, cared, and tried very hard, but he wasn’t ready to handle a kid like me and in hindsight, I know that. He needed grief counseling, and I needed therapy, and neither of us was getting it. I don’t… I don’t believe anyone in the Temple would have known how to handle a kid like me.”

“But you don’t regret it.”

“I was meant to be a Jedi,” Anakin says, as firmly as he can without getting unnecessarily bitchy about it. “My struggles with the Code aside, I was meant to be here. But the Temple doesn’t have any resources for children who come older, and I think… I think you do need that.”

“You just outlined why a child can’t follow the Code if they come from a different enough background,” Windu says.

Anakin shakes his head. “No, that’s not—I think a kid like me can learn to be a Jedi, if a little unconventional, if they’re taught correctly. The desperation to cling to anyone and anything you have can be unlearned. It takes time and effort, but it’s possible. Soka and Ben are good at balancing Tatooine care with Jedi control. If you talk to Ben, you get an entire philosophical breakdown about it, but I’m more concerned with the child psychology, because that’s what could have broken me.”

Windu frowns. “You’re building up to something.”

“I think the Jedi need programs for children found older who can’t become full Jedi,” Anakin asserts. “Even those who cannot reconcile what they absorbed growing up with the Code and Jedi tradition… they, we, need guidance. The Council tried to reject me for being too old, and now that I’m grown I understand why, but… Master Windu, what do you think would have happened to me if I hadn’t had my Master to fight for me, and had been turned away?”

“We’d have looked into placing you back with your mother and, upon finding out that she was still enslaved, secured her freedom,” Master Windu says. “Qui-Gon Jinn had taken responsibility for you, and thus you were a ward of the Temple until such a time as you were safe again. It would have been cruel to keep you from your mother if we were not to raise you a Jedi, and crueler still to allow you to return to slavery.”

“And you think I’d have been safe with her?” Anakin asks. He needs Master Windu to understand this. “You think that would have ended well?”

“You don’t?”

“Ventress,” Anakin says. “Maul. Aurra Sing, even.”

Windu considers that. He looks across the grand, green room of the garden, and finally speaks. “You think you’d have been found and corrupted by a Sith.”

“I’d already helped Naboo win a battle. I was a powerful child with no support system in this respect, eager to please,” Anakin says. “Ventress and Maul both got twisted into Sith Apprentices. Aurra Sing was just a bounty hunter, but… even if the Jedi had never found me, and the Sith remained unaware, do you think I’d have ended up better than Sing? Or would the pressures of slavery have led to my Fall anyway, eventually slaughtering my owner, the Hutts, the entire system of Tatooine’s hells?”

Windu rubs a hand over his forehead. “I understand what you’re getting at.”

“It’s not just me,” Anakin says, as carefully as he can. “Even without the Sith, there are plenty of Force-Sensitive children in terrible situations that are liable to Fall just because of how power is wielded by those at the bottom. Refusing to take on students who are already at risk… the Jedi are meant to monitor Force users to prevent Sith and other dark-aligned people from harming the galaxy. It’s one of our primary duties. If the Jedi are allowing darksiders to rise just because of an age limit…”

“I get it,” Windu says, just a little aggressive. “I understand. Give me a minute.”

Anakin tries to wait. He’s older now, he can do that. He can be patient.

He tries to convince himself that it’s true.

“You have a point,” Master Windu finally allows. “And with the knowledge that the Sith are out there, still, it’s a more salient point than most would think. The EduCorps already has a subdivision for teaching meditative techniques to low-level force users who need to learn shielding but aren’t sensitive enough to be Jedi, or are just too old, but I see your point about encouraging a program for powerful Force-Sensitives that aren’t discovered early enough to integrate into the community in full.”

“And a more comprehensive Search pattern for the Outer Rim?” Anakin suggests. He shrugs at the look he gets. “What? You’ve seen my midicount. I was on Tatooine for almost a decade, and the only reason anyone found me was that Qui-Gon had to crash a ship in the middle of nowhere. I’m sure the Force led him to me, given all the coincidences, but that’s still a solid nine years that nobody did, despite how I apparently ‘shine like the sun’ or whatever.”

“Humble.”

“The last time I took a midichlorian test on a portable counter, it literally broke the device. That’s not arrogance, that’s just absurd.”

Windu looks exhausted by the comment. Anakin can’t bring himself to feel too bad about it.

“What about Jedha?” Anakin suggests instead. “Jedi find the kids, but if they’re too old to be Jedi, we could coordinate with one of the temples at Jedha to see about having them raised in the traditions of the Whills? They’re a little less orthodox, aren’t they?”

“In some respects,” Master Windu says. “More constrained in others, but… it’s a possibility. Most of the overlooked children, yourself included, are from parts of the Outer Rim that aren’t part of the Republic, Skywalker.”

Anakin shrugs. “And many of them would have been happy to be found and collected by a Jedi, even if they couldn’t become Jedi. Not the Dathomiri, since they’ve got their own thing going on, but… from what I know about Ventress, she actually did have a Jedi Master before the situation on Rattatak became… what’s the word… untenable? He died and she was left alone, and she’d been a slave already and it just… did not end well for her. But that was a planet overrun by pirates and warlords, and would have been approved as a planet the Jedi could help without it being a weird colonialism thing… if the Senate weren’t made up of cheapskates, at least.”

“Skywalker.”

“My name isn’t actually a reprimand, you know.”

“You’re not supposed to just say that,” Windu groans, running a hand over his face. “The Senate’s choice in funding is not optimal, but insulting them in that way, even in private—”

“They’re assholes,” Anakin says, and doesn’t let his humor show. “Except my late wife, but she’s not part of the Senate in this time, so I feel no shame in accusing the entire shitshow of being cheapskates.”

Windu looks about ready to push him off the ledge.

“You’re never allowed to go on diplomatic missions, are you?” Windu mutters.

“Unless it’s to Mandalore,” Anakin clarifies. “Also, never send me to Tatooine. Ever. Please. I kriffing hate that planet.”

“I’m going to assume you have plans to kill a Hutt if we ever send you to—”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” Windu sighs. “I’ll discuss this with the Council, see how they feel about reaching out to Jedha for your suggestion regarding the Whills.”

“And you’ll tell them not to worry about my kids?”

“Skywalker, they are never going to stop worrying about your family,” Windu tells him.

“That’s fair.”

[stagemanagerssaygo]

Heaven and Hell: or my experience being a person of color in Disney’s Hyperion Theater

by Cooper Howell

Heaven and Hell: or my experience being a person of color in Disney's Hyperion Theater. #holdingtheateraccountable Im just gonna go ahead and be straight up. This is pretty scary to share. HEAVEN: Once upon a time Liesl Tommy cast me as Prince Hans in Frozen: Live at the Hyperion. And I was gooped. GOOPED. There was nothing in my prior history that gave any indication this was possible. Up until then every role I played had to do with my race. Every. Single. One. And even ones where it didn’t (Shakespeare or classical pieces mostly) I was always made aware that the novelty of me being a poc in that role that gave me the part. So much did I not expect to get this part that when I got the callback I rolled my eyes and didn’t take the actual callback seriously. I mean, there was a zero percent chance that Disney would ever let me play a Prince, especially when the dude in the movie is a ginger. But then I got it. And immediately everything I thought was possible about my career changed. My whole life I’ve never inwardly felt black. I’ve never inwardly felt white. I’ve always felt like I was Cooper, you know, on the inside. But whether it was every single white human in Utah reminding me that I was “the whitest person they ever knew/saw” (which DIDNT mean how white my skin was. It was how white I ACTED) or Mr. Johnson, my 7th grade drama teacher, telling me that he “wanted to put Velcro on the ceiling to see if I’d stick” or Mr. Smith, my high school drama teacher, saying “finally we can do black shows” as soon as I entered high school and then not casting me in roles because of the "optics" of it, or even my best friend in high school Tanner Harmon who called me "blackie", I was always reminded that I was an other. So imagine getting paid good money to put on that $10,000 costume and waltzing out to 4000 people a day to play a really amazing part. A fantastic, evil, complicated, person who sings a killer duet and then grabs the show by the throat with a vicious about-face monologue... and not once was my race ever mentioned cuz it didnt matter. What was being prized was Cooper, my talent, not my skin color that I never asked for. Heaven. Liesl MADE SURE, almost overly sure, that the poc’s in the cast felt equal. The kingdom of Arendelle, after all, is a make believe place. It can be whatever. From having Disney executives come and tell us that they were happy to have us there, to side conversations with John Lasseter, we were made to feel overly welcome playing the parts we were playing. She encouraged us to dive deeper into the script of a cartoon that I didnt really think much of until I was in it. We were encouraged to ask why. We felt seen as talent and not commodities. There were, of course, detractors. Gosh, I remember people at a party of cast members from "Mickey and the Magical Map" another show at Disneyland which features a princess and the frog number and many of those casts mates angrily claiming that “if that black girl Tiana Okoye can play Elsa than I should be able to play Princess Tiana” and then looking at me to confirm that was okay to say, not realizing that a) she’s one of my best friends, b) that I’m in the show with her also playing a role that wasn't created to be a poc, c) how racist that sounded, and d) why there's a difference there and why that wouldn't make sense. On Liesls final night I came up to her and said “I don’t know why you did it but thank you so much for casting ME in this part” to which she replied “you mean why would I cast a handsome, talented person in this role?” And I stuttered something like “well, I mean, I’m black. You know...” to which she tilted her head to her side and said “no. I don’t know why. Tell me why that matters.” And I had no answer. Seeing that I had no answer she smiled. That was the answer. There was no reason. On the spot my outlook about myself changed. Windows into what I thought was possible for me opened. -------------------------------------- HELL: And then Liesl went back to NYC and she was replaced by a man named Roger Castellano as show director. Rogers task, he told us on the first day, was to "change the show". We were not told what needed to be changed or even why, but that changes were on the horizon. You've got to understand: to a full cast of actors who had just spent more than three months dissecting a 60 page Disney script with a Tony nominated director like it was Shakespeare, we were initially emotionally/mentally/spiritually resistant to changes. But then it became clear that the spirit of collaboration was over, and the show changes were to be given without the same care, consideration, and thematic explanation of why they were being made. Everyones initial reaction was to push back, but when people who questioned their notes or their changes started getting days removed their schedule or being replaced entirely by a new actor, the Hyperion theater became a place where no one was allowed to speak out. Injustices were happening left and right and no one felt they could do anything for fear of losing their livelihood. And that's when the Frozen: Live at the Hyperion became a living hell. In my first note session with Roger he pulled me into a room with Domonique Paton, my best friend and incredible costar who played princess Anna in the show I was in. She just so happens to also be black. Almost all of Prince Hans’s scenes in the show are with her character and so most of my notes would be primarily based on those interactions with her. Earlier in the day I performed with a different (white) actress but it was the show with Domonique that I had a note session about. Imagine my surprise and dismay when, with how Liesl set up the show experience, we were told this: “WHEN THE TWO OF YOU PERFORM THE SHOW TOGETHER ITS TOO… URBAN.” Urban. What else could that have meant, do you think? He could have said maybe “too contemporary” emphasizing that we were maybe too modern in our speech patterns or movements. We weren’t. He could have said “too lax” or “too loose” meaning that maybe we were being unprofessional and goofy up there because we’re really good friends. We were not. The best me and Ms. Paton could think of was a 8 count moment of improv dance that me and Domonique decided to use as a synchronized moment of unity. It happened to fall on the line “our mental synchronization can have but one explanation” and thought, with the freedom that Christopher (the original choreographer) had given us, was appropriate, especially considering everyone behind us was doing the robot. As in the 80s robot. But he didnt clarify. He just said “WHEN THE TWO OF YOU PERFORM THE SHOW TOGETHER IT’S TOO… URBAN” And when asked what he meant he smiled with a little shrug and said "you can figure that out. You're smart." And thats how I became Black Hans and Domonique became Black Anna. My every moment onstage afterwards became about the optics of being a poc in that show. It was if I was suddenly made aware that I was LUCKY enough to be there and under any normal circumstances, or this new directors circumstances, me getting this part would have never happened. But the message was clear. It was especially clear when me and Domonique Paton shows together durastically decreased and made even more clear when the vast majority of the new hires were not people of color. But no one said anything. And made even MORE clear when, over the next few weeks, both Domonique and I got COPIOUS notes, ten times that of our coworkers that played the same parts. It was almost a game. In fact we did turn it into a game, seeing who would get the least amount of notes from him in a day. Our costars would even joke about it onstage with us, during the ballroom scene, and jokingly whisper "The shows been up 15 minutes. How many do you think you got today?" But no one said anything. And the notes were about all kinds of things. How we held our hand. If our inflections went up or down on a word. Which side of a couch we leaned on… which was fine! When you're an actor, thats the gig... until we started comparing our notes with the actors that played our same parts and none of them, NONE, would get the same notes. Our notes would be outrageously longer, the note sessions sometimes lasting 10/15 minutes. Others would get the “Oh hey, try doing this or that next time, okay bye” walk-by notes. Sometimes I would sneak into the audience and watch as some of the other Han's, some of whom changed lines, changed entire intentions of scenes, some of whom adding in all types of vocalizations and cackles and dance moves and what have you, and would receive ZERO notes. But I was watching them to see what was wrong with me. What was my performance missing? What am I actually doing to feel this singled out. And then I realized that the thing that was wrong with me was that I was a different color than the 5 other white Hans's they cast. And then I started getting notes about my penis. Most of the time these “penis sessions”, as I called them, were given in private rooms without another stage manager present. It was incredibly unpleasant and unprofessional. In fairness, those Prince Hans pants are TIGHT! And yes, Mr. Howell is indeed a party in the front and a party in the back, but so were a lot of those fellas. And thats where I put my foot down. If Disney was going to provide me with a costume it is not my responsibility to fix their problem, especially when other of my (white) costars had been given a dance belt for the same thing. But they never got penis notes. Private session notes about what their penis looked like in that show. Over and over again I was told to fix it, to not make it (my dick) so apparent, and that “if my daughter were younger I wouldn’t want her to come to a show you were performing at" all the more insulting considering his daughter, a cast member in the show, was a friend of mine and the loveliest person. He started demanding that I buy a dance belt. It was “my fault”, “my responsibility” …and thats where I took my stand. And then it really became hell. Penis sessions were now done out in the open. Once, he screamed at me, in the green room in front of all of my costars during lunch, about how incredible unprofessional I was, about how he was tired of seeing my dick, and that if I didnt go buy myself one I didnt deserve to be there anymore. Followed by a huge litany of notes. That doesnt compare to some of what Domonique went through and I invite her to share them if she’s willing. During this time I went to every stage manager in the building and told them about being singling out and about my penis. They all told me to write a complaint report and it would go to some place called "HR". Which I did. Numerously. More months passed. Nothing from "HR". Multiple cast members who witnessed my note sessions encouraged me to go to the HR themselves. I didnt honestly know what an HR was. As soon as it was explained to me by my allies even what an HR was I went to the head of HR at Disneyland herself and waited outside of her door. I asked her if she got any of my HR reports and she told me that she had received no HR reports from the Hyperion. Ever. And then asked me to fill out a HR form. As we went over it, she asked me some questions, and then set up a second meeting. On the second meeting she said that in order for my report to be given credence I would need witnesses to give their testimony. The witnesses, in fact the very people that told me to go to HR in the first place, said no. They didnt want to lose their jobs. In retrospect that might be the thing that hurt the most but, whatever... anyway, I was told "“well… without testimonies we’ll do an investigation and we’ll call you when we’ve completed it.” I never received a phone call. With absolutely zero protection from the stage managers from both the sexual harassment or my obvious racial targeting I (and others) were experiencing, not to mention that HR reports were doing nothing, aka not being forwarded, I thought about quitting. And when a white stage manager made a show mistake and laughed it off to the cast by saying an entirely offensive lynching joke, I quit. I didnt matter to Disney. How I felt and what I was being put through didnt matter. I was a commodity. My departure was unceremonious. Bizarre. 100% un-magical. I hung up my costume one last time and it was given to a new Hans, one who looked very much like me oddly, and stepped out of the theater. The park was playing “every wish your heart desires will come to you” and I remember laughing at how dead that song felt. The director has since moved on but still works as a musical theater director in Southern California. This one time 4 years ago I got to feel something other than my color for the first and only time in my professional career. It lasted from about March 2016 to July 2016 and never again since. I will never forget in those early days looking at all the beautiful princesses I got to woo and thinking “wow. I’m a prince right now.” Im sure that sounds stupid. But it didn't feel stupid. And a Disney prince! Yeah, a shitty prince kinda... I mean, he's a sociopath... BUT still a Prince! Especially special was being able to look in Dominique’s eyes and I could see the same glimmer of “can you believe we get to do this right now” reflected back. We never knew it was in the cards for us. My race always has and will always be part of my career equation and a determining factor of its projection. It will always be a determining factor in how im treated, by creatives, by people, by the those in authority over me, including the government and the police. #wasitmyskin

Copied in its entirety here from Cooper Howell’s public Facebook post: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10163696376095054&set=a.10151302685610054&type=3&theater

[gardenergulfie]

Emptober Day 4: Ribbon

Rating: G

Word Count: 2539

Relationships: Jimmy | Solidarity/Scott | Smajor1995 | Dangthatsalongname

Characters: Scott | Smajor1995 | Dangthatsalongname, Jimmy | Solidarity

Tags:Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Red String of Fate, Pre-Canon, Post-Canon, Past Lives, Alternate Universe - Empires SMP Setting (Video Blogging RPF), Friends to Lovers, Childhood Friends, Bickering, Flower Husbands, Emptober, Seablings, 

Everything was normal with it until the day he met the other rulers. It was a political meeting of nations, the first time all of them would all be together in years. Rivendell was hosting it and it would be Jimmy’s first time out of the kingdom. Jimmy and Lizzie were representing the Ocean Empire as heirs but they were allowed to meet and greet with whoever they wanted. Lizzie quickly ran off, introducing herself to the Mezalean prince and leaving Jimmy to flounder alone. He gripped the ribbon between his fingers nervously but took a deep breath and approached the first person he could see. That person was a winged elf with blue hair and a very aloof expression.

Emptober Day 4: Ribbon

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AO3 Link

Fic below the cut

Jimmy was a pretty normal guy. I mean he was the leader of an empire but compared to the other leaders and even his own citizens he was normal, maybe even average. Just a pretty basic dude. But Jimmy had something, a part of him, that was very not normal. It was a ribbon tied around his left wrist. It was green and blue with a design of red flowers that Jimmy had never seen before. The ribbon had one end constantly trailing out of sight. It had been there for as long as he could remember and strangely enough, seemingly no-one else could see it.

When Jimmy was little he tried out some tests with the ribbon. He found out that he couldn’t tangle it, he couldn’t trip people with it, he couldn’t hang things on it, it didn’t interact with water like most fabrics did, it was just intangible to anyone or anything but Jimmy. He’d told his sister Lizzie about it but she didn’t have one and she couldn’t see or feel it. He’d even gone to the local library to do research on it which did make the bookkeeper give him a strange look, he’d never been one for academics before but he just needed to know. He found nothing but some sappy love stories about people with invisible red strings of fate that connected them to their one true love. Jimmy didn’t really believe these stories, besides he had a ribbon not a string.

Once or twice in his life Jimmy had felt a tug on the ribbon. It felt like a person on the other end of it had pulled on it. Was there someone also connected to him? Were those stories about strings of fate true? Jimmy followed the ribbon for a long time, only stopping when he realized that he was at the edge of the kingdom. If there was a person on the other end, they weren’t from his home empire.

For a while that was it. Nothing new could be found out about the ribbon and so Jimmy resigned himself to it just being a mystery forever. On the plus side, he didn’t really mind it that much. It didn’t hurt him or get stuck on anything which was nice and it was a nice texture. Sometimes when he was anxious or just restless he would twist it between his fingers and fidget with it. He got some strange looks, fidgeting with nothing, but it wasn’t that weird so no-one really questioned him.

Everything was normal with it until the day he met the other rulers. It was a political meeting of nations, the first time all of them would all be together in years. Rivendell was hosting it and it would be Jimmy’s first time out of the kingdom. Jimmy and Lizzie were representing the Ocean Empire as heirs but they were allowed to meet and greet with whoever they wanted. Lizzie quickly ran off, introducing herself to the Mezalean prince and leaving Jimmy to flounder alone. He gripped the ribbon between his fingers nervously but took a deep breath and approached the first person he could see. That person was a winged elf with blue hair and a very aloof expression.

“Hello! I’m Jimmy Solidarity of the Ocean Empire!” He said to the elf, his voice coming out louder than he intended from nerves. He winced as the elf turned to him with a mildly peeved expression.

“Scott Smajor, heir of Rivendell.” The elf said coldly. He assessed Jimmy lazily but his eyes stopped on Jimmy’s left hand, the one holding the ribbon. His cold mask dropped and Jimmy could see an expression of shock and mild intrigue before it went back up. “I’ve never spoken to a citizen of the ocean empire. Are you all this small? It's kinda cute” Jimmy bristled a bit at the insult? Flirt? He couldn’t tell but he knew enough to be offended.

“Not all of us can be as tall as elves. I am quite a normal height! And I’m not cute.” Jimmy snapped back. Scott looked briefly surprised at his retort but then smirked.

“Not cute you say? That adorable pout on your face says otherwise.” Scott says, lifting his hand to gesture at Jimmy’s expression. A hand that had a blue green and red flower patterned ribbon tied around it. The same ribbon that existed around Jimmy’s hand. Jimmy’s eyes widened and he looked at his own ribbon. Sure enough, they were connected. So there was a person on the other end of it and Jimmy had found them. But Scott? Really? This ribbon better not be one of those soul things, he does not want to be bonded to that rude elf.

Jimmy realized that he should probably respond to Scott. He’s been standing silently for about a minute now and Scott was surly waiting for him to say something.

“I wasn’t pouting! I was upset at being called cute. Not everyone likes random strangers calling them cute, you know.” Jimmy says back. Scott looks thoughtful.

“I don’t know. If a pretty boy like you walked up to me and called me cute, I don’t think I’d be complaining.” The elf says back. Jimmy sputters as he tries to think of a response. He really wasn’t someone who got flirted with often, even as a joke, and it was very disarming.

“Well I’m not you so I care.” He says back with his face bright red. He knew it wasn’t the best comeback and from Scott’s smug expression he could tell it hadn’t hit the mark he was aiming for.

“Right sure.” Scott says with an eye roll. “This conversation’s being nowhere and I already won it so why don’t we talk about something else. I could take you on a tour? I don’t think you fishfolk get the chance to see elven architecture often.” Jimmy once again bristled at Scott’s mild insult but agreed to the tour. Scott led Jimmy away from the front hall and outside into Rivendell proper. Jimmy wouldn’t admit it but Scott was a pretty good tour guide, he knew a lot about the kingdom’s history and culture and was good at talking about it, even if he still flirted and insulted Jimmy quite often. Scott showed Jimmy the sheep pens, the owl roost, and apiary, all places that Jimmy had only seen glimpses of during the trip here.

In the apiary Jimmy saw something. A red flower, identical to the ones on his ribbon. He called Scott over, asking what kind of flower that was. Scott glanced over and when he saw the red flower Jimmy was talking about he briefly touched the ribbon tied to his own hand before answering.

“Its a poppy. They’re a common flower and grow in most places. You haven’t seen one before?” The elf asked. Jimmy shook his head.

“I don’t think they grow in the swamps. I would have remembered seeing a flower this red before.” Jimmy gently touched a petal of the flower. It was beautiful and it made Jimmy feel…. weirdly bittersweet? It was just a flower. Why did Jimmy feel like crying then? He blinked away the tears that were forming and backed away from the flower. Scott was giving him an odd searching look.

“It's my favorite kind of flower.” Scott said at last. “I always make sure there’s at least one in the apiary at all times.” Jimmy was surprised at this personal info that Scott was just telling him. Scott hadn’t talked much about himself, mostly speaking about the elves and their great kingdom. Him just dropping this strange piece of personal information seems out of pace and it made Jimmy wonder why he did it. The elf was still looking at him, waiting for Jimmy to say something in return.

“It really is lovely.” Jimmy responded. “Does it have any special meanings?” Jimmy had heard of flowers having special meaning attached to them though he hadn’t learned much about them. Lizzie had but not him.

“Sleep, peace, and death are what the poppy represents.” Scott says, unconsciously tugging on the ribbon. Jimmy felt that tug, just more proof that they were connected. Sleep, peace, and death were strange meanings for the flowers on his ribbon. Maybe the type of flower didn’t mean anything but it's a magic ribbon so that was unlikely. Jimmy was hoping that his flowers meant peace or maybe sleep, death was something he’d really not want to be tied with.

Scott had been looking more and more nervous the more Jimmy thought. The elf was trying to hide it but the fluttering of his wings and shuffling of his feet gave him away. Jimmy was about to ask him about the problem when a loud gong rang across the city.

“That's the feast bell. They’re about to start dinner.” Scott says, moving towards the door to the apiary. “We need to go quickly so we’re not late.” Jimmy let the topic of Scott’s anxiety around him drop and the two rushed towards the main hall. They were separated in the crowd when they got there, Jimmy being reunited with Lizzie who asked him where he was and introduced him to her new friend Joel. Jimmy didn’t see Scott for the rest of the night, only briefly catching a glimpse of him when it was time for him to leave.

Jimmy met Scott quite a few times over the course of many years, the two becoming rulers of their own nations, Scott in Rivendell and Jimmy in the newly formed Cod Empire. They maintained a similar relationship as they had when they were young, Scott teasing and flirting with Jimmy and Jimmy getting flustered and firing back with his own bad insults. Neither of them brought up the topic of the ribbon though Jimmy was pretty sure that Scott knew at this point. The many glances at Jimmy’s left wrist was a pretty big clue to that.

Years past, Jimmy and Scott were still leading their empires and occasionally bickering with each other. The demon plagued them for a bit and in that time they became allies in a very strange way, Scott taking Jimmy on a date. The many poppies around the date place was a nice reference to the ribbon and a knowing look from Jimmy let Scott know he knew what was up. It took a couple more suggested dates for Jimmy to realize that the date wasn’t one of Scott’s normal flirts but that Scott was actually interested in him. The two took it slow, going on quite a few more dates before they were ready to speak of the ribbon out-loud.

Jimmy remembered it as a chilly evening, the two of them drinking warm tea inside of Jimmy’s house. Scott had made the excuse of it being too cold back home and that the swamp was just much warmer but Jimmy knew the elf at this point to know that Scott wanted to spend time with him. They had done some baking following a simple recipe that somehow they still managed to mess up and then salvage at the last minute. Now with a mug of tea in hand and slightly burnt cookies on a plate in front of him, Jimmy was feeling brave. He tugged on the ribbon once then twice when Scott didn’t look over from his cup of tea. The second tug caught the elf’s attention and he looked down at the ribbon resting beside them both.

“I think at this point we both know about the existence of this,” Jimmy waved his own end of the ribbon, “and the fact that it connects them. I don’t know about you but we’ve been dating for a bit. We might as well talk about it.” Scott blinked in surprise at the question coming from seemingly nowhere but nodded at set down his drink.

“I was wondering when one of us was going to be brave enough to bring up the soul ribbon.” Scott said. “I’d have thought you would have blurted the question out way before now.” Scott teased with a small smirk. Jimmy let the insult flirt fly over his head, mostly focused on the words soul ribbon.

“Wait, the soul ribbon is like a string of fate? The stuff from those love stories?” Jimmy asked. Scott looked confused at the question.

“Wait, you mean you don’t know about soul ribbons? They’re real and way more than just stories. We’re kind of living proof of that.” Scott said. Jimmy leaned back in his chair a bit more.

“The only information I found about anything similar to the ribbon was stories about red strings of fate that connect people destined to be together. They were just fiction I thought but you’re saying that it’s really real. We’re soulmates?” Jimmy asks.

“Soul ribbons are a bit more complicated than just the idea of fated couples. They’re broken promises from a past life. When two people promise to stay together but something happens where they promise is broken, the universe will step in and give them another chance. Hence, the soul ribbon.” Scott explains. “The pattern of the ribbon normally has some kind of meaning relating to the past life. Soul ribbons can’t really be studied but there have been enough cases that people are now pretty sure of their meaning.”

“So in another life, we made a promise to each other but it got broken? And poppies were important to us?” Jimmy questioned. “Well that explains why I feel so happy and sad at the same time when I see a poppy. Past life emotions, huh.” Scott reached out and took a cookie with one hand and Jimmy's own hand with another.

“I understand if this is a lot to take in.” Scott bit his lip, looking anxious. “Again, the soul ribbon doesn’t mean that we have to be together. It’s just the universe giving us a second chance. So if this is too much for you we don’t have to keep dating-“

“What? Scott no. I don’t want to stop dating. It’s strange, yeah, but I mean I already knew we were connected. This doesn’t have to change anything for us! I’m happy to know how we’re connected, this solves a mystery I’ve always been wondering about. I mean, better lovers in a past life than fated enemies in this one.” Jimmy said passionately, laughing a bit at his own joke at the end. Scott’s face brightened up and he smiled back at Jimmy.

“Was that one of your theories? Fated enemies?” Scott chuckled as he took a bite of his cookie. Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck bashfully with his free hand.

“I mean we were always bickering. It wasn’t too strange of an idea.” Jimmy defended himself.

The two of them continued to talk for quite a few more hours before they eventually fell asleep together, bundled up under a quilt. Their hands were intertwined, the two ends of the ribbons brushing against each other. The universe looked down at these second chance souls and felt pride. They really had found each other again.

[ellstersmash]

Not to Keep

Fandom: Mass Effect (Original Trilogy) Pairing: Kaidan x f!Shepard Rating: T for Teen (cw for alcohol use) Words: 2.7k [Read on Ao3]

shep and kaidan go undercover, set early in me1. this was originally a prompt for "fake relationship" from Leather & Lace Romance Week, but then I waited 3.5 years to finish it 🥀

-

It all seemed so simple. Infiltrate a wedding, extract intel on Benezia, use that to find Saren.

Easy-peasy.

Until Shepard shows up in the shuttle bay looking like that. They've only been working together for a couple of months, and Kaidan has seen her covered in blood spatter, dripping sweat post-PT—hell, even bare naked in a hotel room. But it’s safe to say he never thought he'd see her like this. Full makeup, soft curls, a long red dress that shouldn't fit anyone that perfectly, and, dangling from two fingers, a pair of classy black heels.

Kaidan swallows hard and gives her a curt nod. “Ma’am.”

“Alenko.” He shifts on his feet as her eyes travel the length of his body and back up, her cool stare giving nothing away. “You clean up nice.”

“Ah, thanks. And you look—”

“Oh, I'm dressed to kill.” Lips the same shade as her dress curve into a grin. “Figuratively, for once.”

Kaidan chokes and laughs, caught off guard in a mixture of nerves and surprise. “Was that a joke, Commander?”

Her expression narrows into a pinched, self-deprecating smirk. “If you have to ask, then no. And I definitely haven't been thinking about it since Williams zipped this damn thing up.”

The thought of his CO, this formidable woman, giggling to herself over a stupid joke for an hour is... well, it’s uncharacteristically cute. Kaidan rolls it around in his head for an indulgent minute, trying on the fit before letting the image go.

Just one more thing to jam into that Never Gonna Happen file.

“Right,” she says, back to business. “Let’s get this over with.”

They board the shuttle for the short trip to the venue, and go over the mission brief one final time: intel extraction remains their highest priority—one of their hosts, Polona T’Shan, was rumored to have a close business connection with the matriarch; protecting their cover is important, but heavy security is not expected; their false identity profiles should be enough to get them in the door, and from there the two of them will be responsible for avoiding unwanted attention by appearing as a couple.

Kaidan knows his own limits. He’s a soldier, not an actor. This pretending to be someone else, this lie, it isn't part of his training and it sure as hell isn't part of who he is. But if Shepard’s as nervous as he is, she isn't showing it.

She’s looking at him again, in that intense all-in way she sometimes does. Before her, he had never met someone who was aware of—and pursued—what they wanted with such confidence, such dogged determination, and to have that kind of focus set on him even for just a moment is… terrifying. In a good way, he thinks. It makes him feel warm and cold at the same time. It also makes him want to stare right back, but that way lies only trouble, and none of them need another helping. Not right now.

Kaidan leans back and rests his head on the cool, if slightly unsteady, inner shuttle wall as Shepard drums a rhythmless pattern into the space between their seats.

---

Kyra drains her glass.

As it turns out, Asari weddings aren't all that different from the few human ones she’s attended. Though this reception is a far more extravagant affair than she’s used to: four days of mingling and games and dancing and drinking and food. Really not her cup of tea.

And apparently not Alenko’s, either.

He’d made a beeline for the bar as soon as they’d entered, and returned with an easier stride and a glass full of some bubbling neon sugary shit for her. She’d have preferred something stronger, of course, but they do have a mission to complete. If they can manage to get Polona alone for a moment.

She slips her hand into the crook of his elbow and feels him stiffen, then relax. Quick and conscious. He’s nervous, out of place, on edge, and then completely calm and collected.

No doubt in her mind he was the right pick for this one.

The thought settles her stomach, and just in time. Two asari approach, their hands extended in enthusiastic welcome.

“Greetings!” one of them says, with a voice smooth and sweet as wildflower honey. “Oh, what a lovely pair you two make. Right out of the vids, could be. This one’s even better looking up close, don’t you think so, Liria?” The asari takes Alenko’s hand, sensual and deliberate, then turns her attention to Kyra. “And goddess, that dress is stunning; really, sweetie, it fits you like a glove. You”—she drags one finger down Alenko’s lapel—“are a lucky man, I hope you know.”

Eyes wide, he clears his throat and coughs, then regains his composure with a brief glance in Kyra’s direction.

The second asari offers an apologetic look to each of them in turn. “Rialla, darling, slow down or you’ll scare them off.”

“They certainly look sturdy enough.”

“I am so sorry. She’s had quite a bit to drink, I’m afraid. Never could pace herself at a wedding.” She laughs. “My name is Liria, and my companion’s name is Rialla, and ever since we saw you walk in, we have just been itching to get to know you.”

Kyra plasters what she hopes is a warm smile on her face, mentally pulling up her cover identity as reference. “Emily, and I’m delighted to meet you both. This is John, my um—”

“Her very lucky partner.”

The two matriarchs titter and tease him, both in turn, and once again he’s in control. Kyra can’t help but be impressed by how effortlessly he charms them. And she’s far from immune. It’s her mission, yet she is all too prepared to be led around the room by that firm hand at the small of her back.

Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko: respected Alliance Marine, powerful L2 biotic, all-around stand-up guy, and—apparently—a smooth son-of-a-bitch. It’s an unexpected feature for someone so soft-spoken and unpretentious. Like he has a hidden switch somewhere.

Or a button.

Press For Instant Charisma.

She briefly entertains the idea of hunting for it, then aborts the thought with a twist of her lips and tunes back in to the conversation.

---

The lie is getting easier. Shepard is tucked under Kaidan’s arm, and he’s almost comfortable.

Their new friends are exactly the right sort. Nosy, talkative, well into their cups, and connected. Old friends of their mark, both of them, and Liria has history with Benezia herself. Shepard spins her tale about a chance meeting with the missing matriarch at a charity benefit and their tapering correspondence, followed by a rumor igniting hope for reconnection. And they eat it right up.

All he has to do is act natural and help Shepard keep them talking.

“Well, you know Polona wasn’t only Benezia’s lawyer.” Liria leans in close, her voice not quite as hushed as she probably intended. “They were involved, some centuries back. Quite the scandal at the time, but then Benezia always had... selfish tendencies. Now, I’m not sure why they parted ways, or how serious it was, but—”

Not to be outdone, Rialla’s hands flutter for attention as she pipes in. “It must be more than a passing fling from two hundred years ago, though, because I heard that her Turian lover—or, well, husband now—almost called off this very wedding!”

“Really?” Shepard asks. What’s supposed to be idle curiosity is bordering on serious interest, her voice taking on a firm, interrogative quality to match her narrowed gaze, but a brush of his thumb on her shoulder and she reigns it in. Loosens up with a tilt of her head and a hand to his thigh that has him tensing up instead.

“Oh, yes,” Rialla says. “It was all very tenuous there for a while. And to think, then the four of us would never have met!”

Kaidan raises his glass with a smile as genuine as he can muster. “A tragic loss for us, to be sure.”

With a deep, warm smile, Rialla fans her face and leans in close to Shepard, but speaks for the whole table to hear. “Do let me know when you're finished with him, would you, dear? I think I may be quite in love.”

He's fine until Shepard smirks, then he's far too warm. Suffocating.

He tugs at his collar. “You think their, uh, conflict had something to do with Polona and Benezia’s involvement?”

“I seriously doubt it,” Liria says with a dismissive wave of her hand. “That was ages ago, not yesterday. Beni’s still pining after Aeth—”

Rialla laughs. “Oh, it’s Beni, now? I had no idea you were such intimate friends!”

“I’m 800 years old, my dear.” Liria scoffs. “I have quite a few friends you don’t know about.”

“Is that supposed to make me jealous?”

“Of course not, don’t be silly!”

“Silly? Goddess, must you always be so patronizing?”

“Must you always twist my words?”

“Oh, here we go!”

The situation spirals into chaos before either he or Shepard can recover it, and she stands up from the table, pulling at his elbow.

“I love this song,” she mutters pointedly, and leads him to the dance floor. It’s a slow number, thank god. He’s not nearly drunk enough to dance to something with a beat.

They sway slowly, and she presses close, his neck prickling underneath her palm. His own hands settle on her waist, then more naturally to her hips.

“Damn,” she whispers. “Damn.”

“I know. But hey, we’ve got the rest of the night. And tomorrow night. And the next night. And—”

“The next night, I know.” She groans and drops her head to his shoulder.

Kaidan smiles into her hair.

---

The night is officially over. The band is still playing, but most of the guests are gone, and despite making a number of connections, they’ve learned nothing more about Benezia's whereabouts.

They have, however, made decent use of the open bar.

Kyra downs the last of her champagne and orders a cocktail, dealer's choice. It arrives glowing and smoking and she takes the skyward trajectory of Alenko’s brows as a personal challenge not to hesitate.

A potent combination of peppermint and blueberries and battery acid hits the back of her throat and makes her head swim on contact.

Next to her, Alenko is nursing his third.

“How’s your drink?” he asks.

“Surprising.”

“In a good way or a bad way?”

“Um… Yes.” She clinks her fingernail against his glass. “How’s your whiskey?”

He frowns and takes a sip. “This is not whiskey.”

“Didn’t realize you were such a connoisseur.”

“No, I mean it is literally not whiskey. Didn’t have it, I guess.” He drinks again. “It’s weird, right? Walk into any bar on Earth and they’ll have a dozen to pick from, but soon as you take off…”

“Yeah.” She sighs. “No burgers. No guac. No ice cream.”

The low chuckle he gives is a sound she’d like to hear again. And again, and again, and—

“When you put it like that, this spacer life is a real sorry existence.”

Kyra nods and wonders what he misses most from home. Or who. But that is none of her business, so she empties her glass and tips the bartender in preparation to leave.

“Sorry tonight was a bust, Shepard.”

“It wasn’t a total loss. Decent food, free booze.” She rests her chin on one closed fist. “Good company.”

“By that, I assume you mean our new asari friends.”

“Sure.”

Holding his gaze is harder than it should be. He cradles his nearly-empty glass and taps his fingers in sequence. Up and down, like a zipper.

At last, he looks away. “I was going to say ‘beautiful,’ by the way.”

“Hmm?”

“Earlier, before we left. I was going to tell you how incredible you looked, but then you interrupted me, and I never really got the chance to say it so I figured I might as well say it now.”

Warmth rises in her belly and she rides it like a wave, unscathed and unchanged on the other side. She turns to face him, wriggling in the seat in preparation like he’s about to try and upend her. “All right, Alenko. Hit me. I’m ready.”

He gives a huff of nervous laughter, one hand going straight to the back of his neck. “Well, uh... that was pretty much it.”

“That’s it? You waited all night to tell me that you were going to tell me I looked beautiful, but didn’t?”

His lips roll together, and he cedes the point with a tilt of his head, then meets her eyes again before his take a slow, uncertain wander around the rest of her features.

“Shepard,” he says when he makes it back, and it’s a name so overused it may as well be a title—but not spoken like that. Low and drawn out and a little bit reverent, it becomes almost intimate for the first time in years and she can't help but wonder how her first might sound.

“You look really beautiful tonight.”

Oh. Oh no. Kyra knows she should say thank you, and tell him to finish his drink so they can get out of here, but this next wave won’t subside and the air won’t reach her lungs and all she can do is stare at him.

“I mean, not just tonight, but especially—” he continues, visibly flustered by her silence. “You know, the dress and the lips—ah, make-up! And, and the hair and everything, it’s just very, um, tasteful, and… Um.” He clears his throat and pushes his drink away by inches, folding his hands tight together. "Feel free to stop me anytime.”

Ah. There. That’s the Alenko she knows and can handle.

“Now why would I do a thing like that?” she says, sending a silent prayer of thanks to whichever god kept her voice from breaking.

The smile they exchange is soft and charged and it smooths him over. His eyes are brown. Kyra knew that already, but clinically. On paper. Hair: black. Eyes: brown. Year of birth: 2151.

She didn’t know it like this, tangibly, all wrapped up and swept away in a simple fact.

This time she’s the one to give in. “You know, you should really keep that button pressed, Alenko.”

“What?”

“The charisma button.” She jerks her head toward the door, grabs his hand for the sake of anyone who might still be awake and sober enough to notice, and leads him out. “Push it. More.”

“I— what?”

Kyra chuckles to herself and steps into the elevator. “Forget it.”

The doors close once she chooses a floor and she regrets taking his hand because now she has to let go.

Kiss me. Come on, Alenko. Quick, before we go back. She can’t think it any louder, can’t make it any clearer without crossing a line. Be better if he does it, but he won’t. She knows he wants to just like she knows he never will, because he’s a good soldier and a good soldier doesn’t fuck with the chain of command. Not without a compelling reason, at least, and she can’t give him one.

Their floor lights up and reality pours in. He follows her across the dock, at a distance now that no one who would care might be watching.

Kyra takes a sharp, deep breath. Three more nights of this—unless they can get their intel sooner. Three more nights of flirting and dancing and soft touches all for show and not to keep. Maybe she should have brought Williams after all. Or Garrus. Or anyone else.

Distracted, she nearly trips getting into the shuttle, and somehow he’s right there, a broad hand on her waist to steady her.

A nod and he detaches. Steps back. “Ma’am.”

Ma’am. But he is a terrible liar, and she’s never been good at a long con.

[kisaxiii]

I have a theory about Bruno and the “prophecies” from “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”

So we know from the end of the movie that Peppa’s “Prophecy” wasn’t a prophecy, it was just Bruno trying (and failing) to reassure his sister on her wedding day. My theory is that none of the “Prophecies” in the song were actual prophecies.

I saw a Tiktok that said they think the gifts came with more than just the outright obvious gift but more subtle gifts as well. Like Camilo’s shapeshifting also allows him to properly pretend to be someone else, automatically knowing their habits and small things someone wouldn’t notice without having to observe someone. Or Delores having super hearing but also having the ability to fine tune and focus on specific things as well as tune others out and understand everything she is hearing and know what it is (what’s that whirring sound? Oh it’s a fly that’s about 2.4 miles away.) as well as Isabella having a vast knowledge of botany, knowing everything about any plant she grows.

But this is about Bruno, not the rest of the family, so what I think his “extra gift” is is perception. Yes, he can create actual prophecies for anything but I think there are certain things he can just look at, run the math in his head, and be able to give you an accurate prediction without having to go through the whole process. After all, look at his room, it’s clearly set up for a que line, meaning people were lining up to get a prophecy from him, and I can’t imagine how draining it would be to have to do the entire shebang for every person in line. I think most people came in with a question, and he was able to logically give them the outcome after a little questioning, similar to how a fortune teller might but his are more accurate.

We already know that’s kind of what Peppa’s wedding day was, so we can apply this to the other lines as well. “He told me my fish would die, the next day? DEAD!” Her fish was probably sick or not looking too good, so she asked Bruno if he thought the fish would get better, and Bruno, upon observing the fish, probably told her something like “I don’t think your fish will live to see tomorrow unless you get it to a vet.” And all she heard was the first part, and assumed it was hopeless to try and save her fish.

“He told me I’d grow a gut, and just like he said!” This one’s open to a bit more interpretation on how the interaction went, but possibly He approached Bruno while eating and Bruno made a joke saying “You keep eating like that and you’ll have a gut in no time”. Thus making the guy think he was given a prophecy when he did indeed get fat.

“He said that all my hair would disappear now look at my head!” I think this one is honestly just male pattern baldness. Like I think he asked Bruno if his hair would stay or go, and Bruno, knowing his family had a history of MPB, told him it would probably go away, and sure enough, it did.

“He told me that the life of my dreams would be promised and someday be mine. He told me that my powers would grow like the grapes that thrive on the vine!” Isabella’s is a bit more vague than the others, so I think she, as a small child, kept pestering her uncle for a prophecy, and to satisfy her, he told her “one day you will have the life you always dreamed” knowing she was especially favored by Abuela and therefore most likely to get anything and everything she wanted. She probably prodded more, asking about what powers she would get, and he was able to accurately guess similar to how Mirabel predicted Antonio’s gift (she gave him a stuffed animal and said “I know you like animals”). He saw she liked flowers and plants, and told her (in a cryptic way adults do when talking to a kid and trying to be mysterious and fun) “Your power will grow like the grapes that thrive on a vine”

“He told me that the man of my dreams would be just out of reach; betrothed to another!” I actually think Delores’ prophecy was given to her later in life, after Bruno had “left”. We already know she knew he was there the whole time based on her earlier line in the song “I can always hear him sort of muttering and mumbling” and the end of the movie when she confirmed she did indeed know he was there. We also know he was watching his family from inside the walls and keeping watch over them. When Mariano started coming around, I think Bruno noticed Delores’ feeling for him, but also noticed that Abuela was thinking he would be a perfect match for Isabella, and said as much out loud. Maybe not with the intention of telling Delores, but she heard nonetheless, and gave up even trying.

So yeah, I don’t think any of the predictions in the song were actual prophecies as much as self-fulfilling prophecies, where he told someone how something was likely to go, and they made it go that way by thinking it WAS a prophecy.

[chalky]

The Commodification of c!Tubbo

This essay is unnecessary but I think about it too much so here you go

At this point, y’all are probably sick and tired of me rambling about c!Tubbo, as this is about all my original posts are. But, I feel as though this is an important aspect of his character that is either swept under the rug or never given any second glance.

Whether intentionally or not, Tubbo has been constantly commodified by allies and enemies alike (don’t even get me started on the fandom, that’s for a whole other post). Like, throughout the entire story of the Dream SMP, Tubbo has been looked down upon as a yes man, sidekick, or extension of another character who is incapable of making decisions for himself, which is such a degrading thing to experience for so long and explains why his character values himself so little.

This is a long one, heads up!

 I want to break up this dehumanization and commodification into three categories:

Tubbo is either a pawn (something to be used), a trophy(something to be owned), or a scapegoat(something to be blamed) to others.

Tubbo Seen as a Pawn:

Wilbur loved Tubbo, but his treatment of him during the Pogtopia arc was definitely sad to see. (Note: Wilbur was spiraling and his mental health was in shambles. He couldn’t help his paranoia and he deserved way better than the ending he got, but that doesn’t absolve the effects of his actions on others). First he took Tubbo on as a spy, a very dangerous role that landed him dead, but throughout Tubbo’s service Wilbur saw him as an obedient pawn, while not a loyal one. A pawn ready to turn to whatever authority figure commanded him best. His remarks about Tubbo being a yes man back this up, and the way he warns Tommy that Tubbo will betray them erases all of Tubbo’s identity and reduces it to that of a spy (again, this is born of Wilburs paranoia, this isn’t his fault).

Dream made it very clear that he regarded Tubbo as lesser than a toy, so obedient and trusting that he wasn’t worth keeping alive because he was so boring to him. The whole speech about Tubbo being worthless wasn’t even directed at him despite him being right there. Dream only addressed Tommy as if he was the one whose opinion on Tubbos fate mattered.

Jack Manifold literally used Tubbo’s trust to attempt to kill Tommy, saying that he was a sweet guy but way too gullible. No better way to treat someone as a pawn to further ones own agenda than by literally using them. (Him talking about how he’d be there to comfort Tubbo after the assisted murder of his best friend still mildly disturbs me).

Quackity managed to talk Tubbo into going through with the Butcher Army, using Tubbo’s power to further Quackity’s agenda (which, by Quackity’s own admission, did not revolve around the protection of L’manburg.) Quackity didn’t care that Tubbo was against violence, and pushed his concerns to the side in favor of his own ideas and kept comparing Tubbo to Schlatt whenever he acted in a way he disagreed with.

Speaking of, THE CONSTANT DISREGARD OF HIS DECISIONS AS PRESIDENT. His Cabinet never listened to him and lowkey every stream they had together was a bit frustrating to me (I’m also a sensitive bitch). They didn’t respect him in any way and undermined his authority UNTIL THEY NEEDED HIM TO SAVE EVERYONE’S LIFE. (Elaborated on in Scapegoat Category).

Technically, as much as I am a Tommy apologist, Tommy’s constant insistence that the Disc War needed to involve Tubbo kind of fits under this category. As much as Tubbo was happy to help, his involvement wasn’t really necessary, but Tommy needed someone to help him. This involvement nearly resulted in his willing death.

The only reason Dream even wanted to kill Tubbo, on top of perceiving him as useless, was to hurt Tommy and give him something of a “hero origin story” like Batman and his parents or Spider-Man and Uncle Ben. So, literally by Dream’s definition, he wanted to fridge Tubbo.

We could refer to Wilbur assigning Tubbo to presidency as Wilbur using him to make the explosion of L’manburg hurt more, but that feels like a stretch to me.

This may be a stretch, but after Tubbo is executed and Tommy starts getting mad at Technoblade, Wilbur eggs Tommy on by saying “Think of what he did to Tubbo,” while Tubbo is literally right there. His emotions on the event doesn’t matter to Wilbur, only how it impacted Tommy.

Tubbo Seen as a Prize/Trophy

The constant referral of Tubbo as something to be owned by someone, like during Wilburs speech of “he’s your Tubbo!”, is a bit off putting though I don’t think it’s meant to be malicious. Very rarely is the sentiment reversed, seen when Ghostbur gave Tubbo the Your Tommy compass, furthering the idea that Tubbo is an object, something to be sought after and secured with little opportunity for him to own something himself. It’s always “Tommy’s Tubbo”. Also when Schlatt gloated about having “his very own Tubbo”.

Tommy shows more possessive behaviors when dealing with the discovery of Ranboo and Tubbo’s marriage, asking about permission and insisting that Ranboo stole Tubbo from him. I’m sure this is subconscious, I know Tommy values Tubbo as a person but he still reduces Tubbo to an object to guard because he treasures his friend.

Another more vague example would be the fact that Schlatt exiled Wilbur and Tommy, but kept Tubbo as his right hand man even though it was clear he was on POG2020’s side. It was a way to insult Tommy, a way for Schlatt to add salt to the wound by keeping his best friend.

The Dream Team captured Tubbo very early into the Revolution, keeping him in a hole and holding him for ransom (this could be played off for laughs, I just remembered it). They also burned down his base, unrelated really but I remember it.

We could also count the way that Dream kept threatening to kill Tubbo if Tommy didn’t return the disc, but this feels like a mixture of pawn and prize, while still dehumanizing as it compares his value to that of music discs.

Yes, I am going to take c!Tommy joking about killing Michael to get Tubbo and Ranboo to break up so he can get Tubbo back seriously. The way he glared at Michael while holding an axe was just for the stream to see, if it was a joke I feel like he would have said it out loud. Even if it is a joke, laughing about taking something Tubbo loves away just to ruin his relationships is a bit yikes and frames Tubbo as something to be won back. You can ignore this if you didn’t see that moment as canon, but there are plenty of signs pointing to this being in character. (Also to be noted, Tubbo didn’t want to show Michael to Tommy, so Tommy ignored him and asked Ranboo instead, who immediately showed Tommy to Michael despite Tubbo’s clear worries)

Tubbo seen as a Scapegoat

His cabinet flip flopped back and forth on the decision to exile Tommy every five seconds. Whenever they spoke with Tubbo, they were all “You’re right! We’re going to listen to you! We have to do what’s right!” and then they hear a half baked plan and completely switch up on what they already agreed to do. (This happened twice. One at the sit down meeting where Tommy revealed Spirit and the cabinet joined Tommy in his mocking, only to blame him for how the meeting ended. Twice at the exile). So when Tubbo had to follow the original plan to, you know, make sure their country wasn’t put under lock and key until every citizen was eventually killed, his cabinet acted so shocked and betrayed and he was Schlatt and a dictator. It’s very true that he went against their plan (THAT THEY MADE FIVE MINUTES BEFOREHAND AFTER HAVING ALREADY AGREED TO THE FIRST PLAN FOR DAYS), but the way they treated him afterwards, as if he was a vile person for keeping his country safe, heavily impacted Tubbo’s mental state for a long time after. What I’m saying is Tubbo was set up to be the villain in that scenario, accidentally by his allies, and purposefully by Dream.

Tubbo was blamed for the destruction of L’manburg by Dream and a few others (also himself)

TUBBO IS CONSTANTLY BLAMED FOR THE BUTCHER ARMY ARC DESPITE IT BEING COMPLETELY THOUGHT OF AND LEAD BY QUACKITY (This is predominately fandom based).

The full blame for Tommy’s exile has rested on Tubbo (I will never forget Tommy calling him a monster), despite the fact he was manipulated and backed into a corner by Dream. Even when everyone has come to understand that Tommy was manipulated by Dream, the same doesn’t go for Tubbo and he’s hit with “imagine exiling your best friend” jokes many times.

Wilbur puts the decision of blowing people up at the festival on Tubbo’s shoulders, absolving him of the blame.

Schlatt made Tubbo tear down the L’manburg walls and the important signs so he could have to deal with the blame (though Quackity took the fall for this).

This is more theory based, but I fully believe Wilbur made Tubbo president right in front of Techno to egg him on to attack L’manburg. Since Tubbo would be the president, he would take the full brunt of Techno’s wrath (and he and Tommy did), and the destruction fell onto him.

So! With my text evidence we can see a recurring pattern in the way that Tubbo has been used by many people over the history of the server without much regard for his feelings. There are very few times when people besides Tommy ask how Tubbo feels about a situation, leaving him to his dark thoughts without anybody caring. Even during the Final Disc War, when Tubbo was literally moments from death, nobody asks how he is. Nobody (except Quackity once) checks up on him, and he builds up his community by himself. Until Ranboo came along, and I am not overexaggerating this, nobody was with Tubbo to support him. He had no support system and nobody cared. They just assume that he is always fine and if he wasn’t, it isn’t their place to intervene. Tubbo is just not respected, feared, or acknowledged unless he has someone by his side, or unless he’s doing something bad in which case he’s unhinged and evil and sure to have a villain arc.

This is just something to find interesting:

The only few characters Tubbo is actively involved with that hasn’t looked down on him as a sidekick or an object has been Foolish, Puffy, Ranboo and Technoblade. You could make an argument of how Technoblade referring to him as “government” could be dehumanizing but I don’t think I’ve actually seen him do that in character? I could be wrong though. Really, Technoblade takes him seriously, but way more seriously than c!Tubbo warrants. Like, he’s looking for a tyrant to beat up and Tubbo is literally just a guy with a lot of issues struggling to keep a handle on his cabinet, which I find funny. But, jokes aside, Technoblade saw Tubbo as a legitimate threat during his presidency and is respectfully cautious of him and his nukes presently, which is surprising to me. Ranboo adores Tubbo and all of his chaos that people are unaware of because they don’t get to know him well enough. Puffy just wants the best for all the kids of the server and knows how to be respectful of their feelings, and Foolish is respectful of Tubbo, if a bit annoyed and intimidated by him.

The point of this essay is just to show that there is a pattern to these things. This is how Tubbo is treated, this is why Tubbo is prepared to die for whatever because because he doesn’t feel he’s worth anything while alive, and this is why it’s frustrating to see characters call him a follower, pawn, or yes man. And here’s the thing: I DONT KNOW WHY THEY TREAT HIM LIKE THIS??? Why him? I can’t really find out why this started to happen.

To sum some things up, no I don’t think every character who treats him poorly is completely evil. Again, some of this seems to be subconscious, some of this could be argued to be OOC, I just wanted to bring this pattern to light.

[myhauntedsalem]

13 True Horror Stories from the Psychiatric Ward that Will Give You the Creeps

Death, illness and tragedy have long been part of the history of insane asylums, and for as long as they have existed, so too have the scary stories associated with them. From haunted hospitals to sadistic doctors and nurses, psychiatric wards have been the inspiration for many of our favorite horror movies and books. Yet, the true stories told by the psych ward workers below far surpass any horrors that we might have seen at the cinema or read in a book.

Without further ado, here are thirteen of some of the creepiest psych ward stories on the internet that have been shared by health care professionals.

1. Holding her own Eyes

My mom told me this story from her time at a neuropsychiatric ward while she was in grad school. She was making her routine room checks and happened upon the most horrific scene I’ve ever heard.

This was during the night shift, and generally, all the patients’ bedroom doors should be closed. So my mom turned a corner and noticed an open door. She saw a staff member’s legs on the floor, halfway out the doorway.

When she looked into the room, she saw the patient, a woman with a severe postpartum psychiatric disorder, who had just gouged both of her own eyes out with her bare hands. She was sitting cross-legged on the floor, holding her eyes in her hands.

The first staff member to witness the scene, who was now lying face down on the floor, had a heart attack when he first witnessed the woman while he was making his rounds.

My mom screamed for help and frantically tried to perform CPR on the staff member. All the while, the woman just sat rather calmly, holding her own eyes.

2. The Saw

I work as a psychotherapist in a hospital system. My definition of creepy is probably quite a bit different from other medical professionals.

The one that got to me the most was a patient who came to us after attempting suicide by sawing both his arms off at the forearm with a table saw. His arms were reattached, fairly successfully too, with only limited impairments in mobility. All I could think was how bad it would have to be to live in his head that sawing his arms off seemed better than that.

He has since completed suicide.

3. Jane?

We had a young lady in our custody with quite a few issues. We’ll call her Jane. Jane’s first night at our facility staff doing a bed check found Jane in a puddle of blood. Turns out Jane had been slicing the skin around her shin with her finger nails and was pulling her skin up her leg, essentially de-gloving her calf.

Jane also had a ritual she performed every night before bed. While in her room she would run between walls in her room touching them in a crucifix pattern. After doing this for a few hours she would sit on her bed and go to sleep. This particular night Jane was frantic in her pace, practically running between walls. Our night staff observed the entire interaction and reported Jane screaming late into the night. When the staff went to check on Jane she reported Jane standing in the doorway smiling. The staff asked what was wrong and Jane replied, “what makes you think you are speaking to Jane?”

4. The Vampire

My mom worked in mental institutions in her younger years (and actually worked at a large, well-known asylum before it was shut down.)

There was one woman there that thought she was a vampire of sorts. She was only allowed out one hour a day, and they had to use safety precautions. She had already attacked and killed at least one hospital worker before these were enacted.

When my Mom asked about her, it was revealed that she had killed at least two of her children, wounded another as well as her husband because she had some sort of physical condition called Porphyria, which apparently made her crave blood.

By the time that they discovered there was something physically wrong with her, she already had lost her mind from guilt and grief.

5. The Spitter

I’m not a psychologist but my friend is. She told me about a patient of hers who was HIV positive and a paranoid schizophrenic. He thought that the nurses who worked at the hospital he was in were trying to kill him, so he would frequently bite his tongue, and spit HIV positive blood into their faces/mouths. When they had to come into contact with him, they were required to wear full masks and gloves.

6. The Only One

I once knew a woman who had spent part of her residency at a psychiatric hospital for people with severe mental conditions. Apparently, the grounds had a lovely, enclosed greenhouse. One day, one of their schizophrenic patients was sitting on a bench, smoking a cigarette, as a heron frantically flew around. It had found its way in and, not being able to escape, it was smashing into the large panes of glass. The man just sat there watching.

Finally, my counselor asked him if the bird was bothering him and he kind of sighed and said, “Thank god, I thought I was the only one seeing that.”

7. Family Photographs

My sister is the director of a psychiatric hospital. There was recently a lady there who would cut her arms, legs and torso open and place photographs of her family under her skin.

8. Under the Bed

Once, a fellow female patient told me she found writings under her bed. They were just old, small wooden bed frames with hard mattresses that would make all kinds of noises when you rolled over, but I still wondered what exactly she was doing lying under her bed to find these writings.

When she first told me, I thought it was a joke. But sure enough, one day during group we managed to sneak away, and she showed me. Indeed, there were stories written under her bed. After that, we had everyone check under their own beds, and there was more writing under every single bed.

They were stories of patients who had stayed here before, or ways they were planning on killing themselves, or who the good and bad nurses were. It creeped me out.

9. Time of Death

Well, my mother was a nurse that specialized in geriatrics, and she worked for several hospice hospitals for many years. She often described situations at her work with several of the patients. She would say that each person tends to have a very similar “checklist” that they follow right before death. This checklist often ended in a very similar way.

They would get caught talking to someone that wasn’t there. When asked who they (otherwise lucid people) were talking to, they would describe an individual who was already dead. When asked what they were talking about, they would say that their relative wanted to know if they were ready to move on. A pretty common response would be, “Yeah, he/she said that she will take me tomorrow at 3:00.” Well, it would often happen that they would die at the exact time their relatives quoted.

10. The Test Subject

I had an hour-long conversion with a delusional guy who was confined to a mental health facility, and who was probably smarter than I am. Lots of these folks believe that somebody – often the CIA – is either beaming thoughts into their heads, or has implanted a microchip in their brains for this purpose. This guy was offering a very thoughtful argument as to why such claims should not be so quickly dismissed.

“It’s precisely because such delusions are so common that mental patients make the best test subjects,” he said. There he was, confined and protected, constantly observed, his health and behavior documented, and there is zero chance that anyone would ever take his concerns seriously. How else would you test and improve such technology? Does the government not have a strong motivation and a plausible ability to create such a device?

“You can see I’m not irrational,” the man said. “I’m just straight-up telling you that they are doing this to me. I know just how unbelievable it sounds, and yet, here I am.”

11. The Boy who Loved Knives

As a tech in psych years ago, there was a 7-year-old kid sent to the floor because the mom didn’t know what to do with him. Sadly, common thing to happen, even if the kids don’t have psych issues. Anyway, the mom was shaking and crying, and they had to take the kid into another room. She was genuinely afraid of her own son. She had suspected something was wrong when she kept finding mutilated animals in the backyard, but never heard or saw coyotes or anything around. The neighbors smaller pets started disappearing. The boy had an obsession with knives, hiding them around the house. Denying anything when the mom confronted him. Then when the two started getting into arguments, he would get really violent and hit her, push her down and kick her, threaten to kill her. On multiple occasions she woke up in the middle of the night with him standing beside her bed, staring her in the face. She put extra locks on her bedroom door to feel safe while she slept. The last straw was when she lifted up his mattress and found 50+ knives of all shapes and sizes under there. So she brought him to us.

I remember talking to him, treating him like he was just any other kid that came through. He seemed remarkably normal, until you spoke directly to him. He had this way of looking right through you, or maybe like he didn’t see you at all while you were speaking.

He would respond like a robot, like he was just saying words because that’s what we wanted to hear. And he would always put on this creepy, dead-looking smile. Like all mouth and no eye involvement in the smile. Especially when he would get away with something, like taking another kid’s markers and they couldn’t figure it out. Still gives me chills laying here thinking about him.

I believe I met a 7-year-old psychopath.

12. The New Mom

I was a pharmacy technician at a hospital with a psych ward for some time. We would have to go around with a cart and dispense the patients’ medications, and being a 5’2″ girl, a security guard or male nurse would accompany me, just as a precaution. I never had any real issues other than the occasional death grip onto my arm or manic outbursts, but there was one boy who was entirely different.

His chart said he was nine and he had pale skin, dark hair, and huge bright, green eyes. He always greeted me in the most polite way, asked how I was doing, and always found something different to compliment me on every time. He was extremely well-spoken and mature for his age, so I began looking forward to seeing him, as normal small talk is definitely cherished in that setting. If he saw me outside of his room in the halls, he made sure to say hello and always called me “Miss Jones” or “ma’am.”

One day, a couple of our female nurses saw me pause to chat with him in the hallway, and waved me over to ask if I was out of my mind. Apparently, when he was in kindergarten, he grew an intense attachment to his young female teacher.

This escalated to the point of him calling her “Mom” and leaving notes for her about how he wished he were her son. He had a normal home-life with both parents, and the teacher tried to explain to him that she couldn’t be his mom because that would hurt his real mother’s feelings, and that she already had that job covered.

So, he went home and, killed his own mother in her sleep by cutting her throat, so his teacher could be his mom. The female staff had a general rule of not interacting with him excessively to prevent any kind of attachment from forming.

13. Bugs

Nothing I can say can possibly describe the year I worked in Psychiatric Intensive Care. Creepy isn’t the thing that comes to mind when I think back on it…more heartbreaking and horrifying. But creepiness was a part of it. Especially evening and night shifts, naturally.

There is always something disturbing about watching someone while they hallucinate. You can tell it is 100% real to them, and something about that makes you believe it, on some level. A lot of stories end with, “and of course, I had to look over my shoulder to make sure”. You see the emotions it brings out.

There was a woman that came in and sat down across the table from me for her admission interview. She had bandages all over her arms and scotch tape over her mouth and ears. She looked very uncomfortable and wouldn’t really sit still. When the nurse would ask her a question, she would peel the corner of the tape back and answer, then stick the tape back on really fast.

We eventually found out that she saw and felt bugs crawling all over her, and they were trying to get inside her body. The tape was to keep the bugs out. The bandages were because some bugs got in and she had to dig them out. She couldn’t sit still because she felt the bugs all over her even while we sat and talked. The worst part was, she had some idea that it was her mind playing tricks on her. Can you imagine going through your life, feeling like someone is continuously dumping buckets of cockroaches on your head, feeling like they’re all over you and getting inside of you to the point that you’re digging chunks out of your flesh in a panic, all while knowing intellectually that none of it is real?