#if sqq is a wife then I think he could pull himself out of his head

[redjayson]

It's like that fic where the plant body is female and SY is like

SY: I am going to be dicked down by the heavenly pillar

LBH: You don't have to?

SY: Oh, I'm gonna.

oh noooo, he's a wife now, he has to sleep with luo binghe, how horrible! oh well, if he has to fulfill his role as a wife then he will bravely do it. he's putting on flavored lipgloss and negligee as we speak and no one can stop him. it's what luo binghe wants, after all!

[bloodyfries]

Adding the fact that Shen Yuan was a rich kid plus the fact that he thinks that running a peak, teaching disciples and going on missions is just lazing around then I wouldn't be surprised if he did some find of sport

Ok, here me out, a lot of rich kids tend to do a whole bunch of extra circulars (trust me, I went to a school filled with trust fund kids) and Shen Yuan considers himself lazy despite very clearly doing a lot. So, he probably got that notion because in his first life he had a jammed pack schedule and uses that as a comparison.

So with this in mind he probably has a bunch of skills, one of those being some form of sport.

Anyway, flash forward to some time post cannon and a wife plot happens. In the original PIDW it was a excuse for a sport episode (or character(s) in this case) with future wives and current wives to wear short clothes and run around. It's probably written because it a fan favorite trope in media and will mist likely bring in a bigger audience (SY can be heard cursing airplane for unoriginalty, contradictions and historical inaccuracy). We'll just say that some kingdom/demon royal family decided instead of violence (because who could ever beat Bingge in a fight?) to use a sports tournament as a way to decide who get to rule.

Well, when this happens in svsss Shen Qingqiu ends up roped into this (ahh, the curse to be a love interest) and just absolutely destroys everyone at off brand tennis (and/or other rich people sports). Luo Binghe would also be destroying people at literally any of the games but he's too busy trying to not lose it over SQQ's (previously stated) short clothing, pulled tightly up hair and skill

[truly-morgan]

[Kinktober 2021: Breeding (18+)]

MoShang | Scum Villain Self-Saving system 08-10-2021

Day 8: [Breeding] / B̷o̷d̷y̷ ̷M̷o̷d̷i̷f̷i̷c̷a̷t̷i̷o̷n̷ / S̷e̷n̷s̷o̷r̷y̷ ̷D̷e̷p̷r̷i̷v̷a̷t̷i̷o̷n̷

Shang Qinghua stumbles on a wife plot who temporarily changes his body to make him able to have children. They end up taking good advantage of that curse.

====

Shang Qinghua had lost count of how many times he had gone to his cucumber bro for some help with the plot he forgot about himself. The man was truly a walking encyclopaedia. It was often not too bad, but then there were days like today, when he was feeling hot all over and his lower region was feeling really strange. He had somewhat guessed it would be a wife plot:

anything to make the wife fuck with Luo Binghe was a wife plot. But of course, now they were stuck with those because the novel story had totally changed.

"I was following my king on a hunt when I saw those nice flowers, So I got closer, wondering if I could remember what they were, I assumed it was safe since I didn’t remember a flower looking like that being poisonous, but then when I tried touching it, I pricked myself on a spike I didn’t see” sqh had been explaining, laying down on a cushion as sqq drank some tea. “I didn’t feel anything at the moment, but then yesterday I started feeling weird all over the place and didn’t want to worry my King about it since he already has so much work to do”.

Sqq wanted to sigh at some of the detail not being useful. “I cannot really help if I do not know what that flower looks like” he points out.

“The petal was similar to those of a lily, but there was easily more than a dozen of them, there were a dark blue with blue-white-ish dotes going up the middle of the petals.

The stamens were rather long and pale and the thingy on top was kinda shaped like a heart now that I thinks of it”.

“Did it have a lot of leaf at the bottom which hides most of the spikes?” sqq asked, only for sqh to nod. His fellow transmigrator sighed heavily, “You fell into a wife plot again, you created that flower for wife #539 who was unable to get pregnant and so she tried using that flower to be able to have a child” sqq mentioned.

“But I should be safe right?” sqh asked, not remembering that. 

“You wrote that it was so great that even man could get pregnant when under its effect, which by the way last easily for a week”.

And this is how he now was in his room (which had been a while since the last time, he kind of unofficially moved into Mobei-jun room), robes loose around him as he was trying to relieve himself from the heat.

What should he do now? He couldn't exactly hide from his King for /minimum/of a week. He didn't want to look like some of these demons that had done it on purpose in the past to try and lure mbj and somewhat trap him with a child (and he knew it could happen because he wrote a couple of plots like this!).

Plus he never heard anything that could tell him mbj was actually interested in having children. Sure he would most likely need an heir one day, but as of now mbj never showed any interest.

Sqh was truly unsure of what he should do now, other than try and relieve himself from the heat and arousal that came with his situation. Plus he could discover just how exactly this curse was affecting him as it did create physical changes he didn't notice before.

His king should be busy all day so he should be able to figure something out before he came back to their shared room to see he was not there.

But as he was thinking this he was surprised by the sound of a portal opening next to his bed, mbj stepping out. Sqh took a moment to react properly, pulling the blanket around him to hide his near-nudity and in just what kind of state he truly was.

“M-my King! What brings you here? I thought you would be busy all day” he called out, blushing even more than he already was before.

“a servant told me you looked unwell” he answered as he walked closer to the bed, clearly sniffing at the air. “and told me you smell strangely very sweet".

Sqh wasn't sure what to think of that. Had he added such a thing? For demons to be able to smell when another was ready to conceive? He then saw his pupils dilate, as if mbj had finally understood, looking a bit shocked, suddenly grabbing the blanket. He wasn't quick enough to pull it back, instead feeling himself being pulled closer to mbj.

He didn't really resist at the hands pulling his legs apart, the demon confirming for himself as sqh was hiding in his hand.

His slightly altered anatomy was now on full display for mbj who looked very interested. “this servant is sorry for the inconvenient” sqh managed to say, nearly letting out a squeak as he felt his finger tease against his already wet pussy.

“I-I am sorry for the inconvenience I will try to find a way to deal with this!” sqh quickly said, unsure if mbj would think this was troublesome to deal with.

“Sect Leader Shen said it would easily take at least a week to die down and I do not want to be a burden for my King so I decided to come here t-”.

The peak lord’s rambling was cut off by passionate lips meeting his, feeling himself being pushed down into the mattress, mbj climbing over him as robes were being undone. It took a moment to realise mbj was actually making a move /while he just learned/ he could get pregnant.

“Wait wait, my King, right now might not be the right time” he tried to say. Wondering where this sudden burst of arousal in his husband came from. Was it contagious?

The kissing and sucking on his neck stopped as the demon looked back at him. “Is sqh against the idea of having a child?” mbj asked, studying his reaction greatly.

To this sqh wasn’t sure what to say. He had obviously never expected to be asked, especially not since neither of them was supposed to be able to bear a child. Sqh never thought about having any in his life, but he wasn’t against the idea.

“W-well no” he started, looking a bit to the side, “I simply thought my King was not interested in having any since he never talked about it before and ignore anyone who inquired about your plan to have an heir” he explained.

“I didn’t want children with anyone else than sqh” mbj replied, making the man blush at that declaration. He had not expected the reason to be because mbj wanted this kid to be theirs, not from someone else. It had probably been ruled out since neither of them was supposed to be able to do that.

A hand was gently rubbing his tights before he was pulled closer to, mbj settling between his legs, cock already hard and now resting against him. He moved his hips a bit, causing something sqh to feel rather new things.

“But if sqh is against bearing our child I will understand, “ mbj said.

Maybe it was because of the effect of the flower, but the way he was talking about /their/ child made something in him warm. He wasn't against that, it was actually reassuring in a way, mbj wouldn't need to find someone else for an heir.

“Yes I want to!” he says. Sure, it’s scary to think that he’ll have a growing being in him and is also unsure what will happen once he gives birth (if nothing goes badly...).

Sqh was waiting for mbj to get to it immediately but instead felt fingers entering where he had already been fingering himself. He may have never led with a lady before, but he was pretty sure that he would be alright, yet there wasn’t really much to convince mbj of that. Maybe telling him he needed it usually was the reason.

But the moment mbj deemed him ready enough there was probably nothing to stop him. He was fucking into his husband, still making sure he seemed alright, but never really stopping since it seemed all right.

Sqh was rather surprised by the rather different feeling of that pussy, moaning even more when mbj decided to see what teasing his cock would do.

After one round sqh was already a bit tired, especially since he had been pleasuring himself for a while before. Yet mbj was not done, large hands still on his hips, cock never leaving its warm embrace as he went back to being hard.

Sure, he was now used to Demon apparently having endless stamina in bed, but it was probably some of the first time that mbj could get back at it so quickly. Maybe the effect of the flower was wearing off on his husband too.

Sqh felt like they would pass the whole evening and night at it, mbj clearly set on breeding him until he was sure he would get pregnant. Good thing mbj had energy for two people since at some point sqh became tired and unable to do much himself.

It had started with him laying on his back, like this he could get all the kisses he wanted, then he tried riding his husband to not have him do all the work, enjoying the way mbj would look at him bounce up and down to milk him.

Then he ended up being flipped over so he was laying face down and ass up for better access, mbj more than happy to keep fucking into him like this. They had one important mission and he would take it seriously.

It was fun and all riding and having sex with his King with this new pussy, but he was but a mere human, nothing that could compare to mbj stamina. At some point he was happy to simply let mbj fuck his semen into him, his brain already feeling mushy from all the pleasure and orgasm he just had. He was pretty sure he had never been fuck this much before.

He ended up so full he was pretty sure no more could fit into him, even feeling some of the cum dripping out of him when mbj finally came out of him, laying down beside him and hugging him close.  “My King is doing a great job” sqh laughed slightly, feeling exhausted.

He felt mbj humming against the top of his head. “We need to do more to make sure it works”. 

Sqh was already exhausted at the idea but smiled softly at that. He wouldn’t mind being exhausted now if it meant having a child with mbj.

====

(well this was like really 30% smut isdjvudb guess I can only write p0rn with plot)

Original - AO3

[misto713]

these tags lived in my head rent-free for half a month so i'd like to add:

when you say yqy wouldn't walk into a hail of arrows for sy and it's an improvement.. i agree that it would have been an improvement but

1/ i think ygy would walk into a hail of arrows for sy even harder

2/ ygy not only loves sy, he also trusts him the way he didn't really trust sj

the 'hail of arrows' tragic ending was... a really well-calculated trap on bingge's side. bingge knew that there was something going on between sj and ygy, and that sj was universally hated in the sect. so, if he 'challenged' cang qiong for sj, ygy would agree to risk it... and the others won't. so ygy would be forced to come alone. that situation wouldn't happen with sy because if he was in danger, liu qingge would possibly outrun ygy to save sy :D . and many others would join.

ygy only walked into that trap for sj not because of affection, but because he refused to let sj down once again. like he let him down at the qiu estate, at the immortal alliance conference where he found him with a demonic cultivator (and no doubt still blames himself for not searching harder after the qiu estate burned down), and like he failed to defend him during or after his HHP trial. because in svsss, ygy was ready to pull out his sword and start chopping hhp and only sy convinced him not to. i doubt sj would have been so self-sacrificing. no, he'd either be silent and glare at everyone, or ask ygy for help... which he couldn't/wouldn't give to save the sect's face.

so, when bingge set the trap, cang qiong abandoned sj, and ygy decided to risk it to try save his xiao jiu. after all, he's only risking himself and not the sect, right? and who knows, if he dies, lbh won't have any more beef with the sect since both the abuser and enabler would be dead, right?

and then cqms loses its last remaining strong martial artist and bingge burns them to ashes.

but, you see, i think ygy was willing to sacrifice himself, but not his sect. he put limits on how much he'd risk for sj. otherwise he would have (as sect leader) commanded the other peak lords and sect members to come and help him save sj.

now compare that to sy, who (let's be honest) showed some really concerning and erratic behavior since jinlan city. especially if it concerns that demonic disciple of his. but when sy asks ygy to trust him and let him try something else first... ygy agrees. even though failure wouldn't just mean sy's death. or his own. it would mean the death of his sect and possibly the world.

and he still trusts sy. let him do what he wants.

he didn't trust sj to so much as explain himself about the qiu estate and the brothels, but trusts sy to handle the insane disciple that he couldn't handle before when the fate of the world is at stake.

yes, you can see it as platonic trust (as platonic as ygy could ever be lol), but i honestly see it as an even stronger obsession and affection than what ygy held for sj.

in conclusion: ygy got wife-beamed harder than anyone else because he was already holding his heart open to sqq and got completely blindsided by how lovable sy can be. by the time he admits to himself (if he ever does) that this is a new person, that new person is already buried deeper in his soul than possibly even his sword. he s just too polite, repressed, and skilled at denying to himself what he wants to do anything about it.

but hooo boy if sy ever showed interest...

btw wouldn't it be funny if sy decided to flirt, told ygy "i don't want to share you with a sword, my love" and ygy qi-deviated on the spot so hard he'd separated with xuan su?? :D

@milfzun

do you guys think yue qingyuan might have fallen for shen yuan too, in the end?

my headcanon is that shen jiu's 'charming personality' has pretty much eroded most of yue qingyuan's affection over the years. he'd still offer back up to his 'xiao jiu' in all things, but it's mostly guilt and nostalgia by the time shen yuan appears. and stubbornness, yqy simply refusing to face the facts tbh.

i wonder if he didn't find 'post-qi deviation' shen qingqiu just that much more lovable, cute and everything he wished his xiao jiu would be. in the end, it was shen yuan that yqy opened up to and to whom he finally gave an explanation. only after shen yuan showed him he 'still' cared about his 'qi-ge'.

it's a shame that shen yuan is now the one that carries the 'guilt' for replacing the original scum villain and taking his place. 'inheriting' yqy's affection even if 95% of said affection at that point is towards shen yuan rather than shen jiu.

i really wish to see yue qingyuan/shen yuan in a happy relationship since i think they could have great chemistry, i just can't see how it could be achieved without 1.000.000+ words full of guilt, impostor syndrome and heartbreak 😔

come on! they could be so soft and happy together!

[thewindsofsong]

Ok ok ok!!! So last night I had a dream that I rec’ed a dmbj/svsss crossover fanfic, but never actually read the fic. Then I woke up because my cat was yowling in the middle of the night.

After talking with @1ebilcat and @merinnan for a while, I managed to flesh out a basic outline of what that fic might look like. Please know that because this is a crossover with svsss, there is papapa mentioned. several times.... (nothing actually explict is described because that would make this not a not-fic)

So one day SQQ and SQH are messing around trying to figure out what this new “unique one of a kind treasure” does when SQH accideny drops some melon seeds on it or something and it suddenly activates.

Meanwhile in dmbj world, the Iron Triangle are pretty much retired from the whole tomb raiding business, but still run Wushanju (better now that wu xie actually concentrates on running it instead of running off every week). Someone comes in with a strange artifact that they found while clearing out a deceased relatives store room they want to sell. Wu xie buys it because he’s never seen anything like it before and wants to research it.

Xiaoge gets super weird vibes from the object, but it doesn’t seem overtly menacing, so he leaves wu xie be (if wu xie is preoccupied he gets in marginally less trouble). However, when xiaoge touches the object with wu xie and Pangzi nearby, it grows a point and gives xiaoge a paper cut. The blood touches the object and it activates.

One blinding flask of light and disorienting tumble latter, they find themselves at the foot of a picturesque mountain with a gate that labels them at the foot of cang qiong mountain. They’re quickly found by the cang qiong crew and everyone is super weird out by each other. Things happen and eventually LBH crashes in and says his shizun is missing mobei-jun is there too because SQH is also missing. More communication happens and everyone realizes this is the artifact’s fault. No one knows where the artifact is.

Meanwhile SQQ and SQH wake up someone completely unfamiliar to either of them. After using magic to light things up, they see that they are in a tomb absolutely covered in different depictions of penises: there’s pictures on the walls, statues of men with WAY TOO BIG penises, sooooo many dildos. Queue SQQ immediately launching himself at SQH with a shriek of outrage because “THERE’S NO WAY THIS ISN’T YOUR FAULT YOU SHITTY HACK AUTHOR!!”

Back with the iron triangle, there’s a research montage going on as they and other CQ sect member scour the libraries for any information about the mcguffin that caused all this randomness. At some point in all of this, iron triangle go to MQF to see if he can take a look at Xiaoge regarding his memory problems. After some more research, MQF learns about an herb that could stabilize his qi and stabilize the fluctuations that cause his amnesia.

Turns out that while proper cultivation doesn’t exist in dmbj world, the Zhang family line has managed to cultivate the family line to extended life but because they’re the only ones that can (maybe due to bronze gate?) it has a lot of dangers. 

The herb needed is of course incredibly rare and only found in some horribly dangerous location. Xiaoge wants to go alone because he doesn’t want wu xie and pangzi to be in danger, but knows that they won’t be left behind. There’s some agnst had about how Xiaoge feels he’s brought pain and suffering to wu xie and pangzi, but of course neither of them are having any of it. The three of them talk about how they’ve never regretted meeting each other and how the adventures they’ve shared have brought meaning and joy into their lives. 

The three of them cobble together some hotpot and spend the night before setting off soaking their feet side by side, content and secure in their bonds with each other. Its very sweet. 

The next day, the three of them set off with LQG and LBH. Right before arriving at the location, bullshit happens and Iron Triangle get trapped in the location where the herb is located and trigger a wife plot in which papapa is the only way out. Iron triangle proceeds to have incredibly kinky marathon sex. LBH and LQG can only listen awkwardly from the boundary, not able to get through, but also not wanting to leave completely just in case something else happens. The sexual tension between LBG and LQG grows to new heights. Neither will do anything about it until SQQ is back home safe. 

After the marathon is over and iron triangle has time to actually sleep, the three of them get cleaned up with the herb in tow and head back to Cang Qiong. They get the herb to MQF who tells them it will take at least a day to prepare the pill for xiaoge to take. That night, Iron triangle has sweet, tender, affirming sex because while they all agree that while xiaoge not losing his memories every few decades is for the better, it also means that he’ll have to carry the memories of wu xie and pangzi long after they’er gone, with no hope of them ever being together again.  Xiaoge assures wu xie and pangzi that this is what he wants, to know that at least at some point, he loved and was loved, that he had a connection to this world and that his life has meaning beyond his obligations to the Zhang clan. Wu xie and pangzi make xiaoge promise to live on after they pass and to find him in their next lives.

Xiaoge takes the pill and the search for a way back home continues again in earnest. Eventually, LBH travels back to the demon realm and figures out how to track the artifact through space and time because his protag halo is too strong to keep him away from his love interest for too long. 

Wu xie and pangzi learn some basic meditation techniques that disciples would learn when first arrive at the mountain. Its too late for them to cultivate to longevity and there’s no guarantee that its even possible in their home world to cultivate if you aren’t a Zhang. Regardless, wu xie and pangzi don’t want immortality, they just want to spend as much time as they can with xiaoge. Wu xie is gifted a flute made with special bamboo and pangzi is gifted a wine jug from Zui Xian Peak. Both have spiritual properties that may or may not be able to function when back home, but they’er good gifts given in good faith. 

LBH, losing patience, forces iron triangle to get moving so he can save SQQ. He bursts through time and space and iron triangle plus LBH, MBJ, and LQG end up in dmbj world, in Wushanju. After scaring the crap out of Wang Meng, the group realizes that while several days have passed in svsss world, its only been a few hours since iron triangle was pulled away. Which is good because Ershu was likely to call in an army if wu xie went missing for no apparent reason. The whole thing would have been way too messy. Probably more than one person would have died. 

What follows is a night of LBH, LQG, and MBJ attempting different divination spells to try and pin point the exact location of SQQ and SQH to varying degrees of success. None of them are good at divination. Regardless, the three of them manage to get a general location of where the two missing peak lords might be and the iron triangle gets to work searching the internet for any rumors or information of any tombs that might be in the area. (Its just wu xie and pangzi looking, but xiaoge standing around still in his beautiful borrowed robes from CQ is good moral support.) 

They hear about some local legends about an ecentric noble from a bygone era that was buried in a very peculiar tomb. Potential tomb located, the whole group prepares to head out. the SVSS gang is convinced to not fly over immediately because that would be waaaaay to flashy and draw unwanted attention to them that would delay things even more. The six of them cram in together into the van and head off. Svss gang are forced into modern clothing and are def a little too big to comfortably sit in the van. LBH hits his head on a doorway at least once on this adventure. At lease two women and maybe a guy slip their numbers to him too. The man is supernaturally gorgeous.

After some more road trip shenanigans,  they arrive at the rumored entrance to the tomb and head in. The tomb has a few traps here and there, but is practically child’s play for the iron triangle to get through. Svsss are appropriately impressed by their competence and LBH and LQG think specifically about how the iron triangle is a true threesome that supports each other and fights together. MBJ just wants his hamster boy back. 

When they near the central chamber of the tomb, they hear the faint sounds of fighting which spurs SVSSS to speed ahead while iron triangle tries to get them to at least be a little cautious about setting off traps. 

The sight that LBH sees when he breaks into the main chamber like the kool aid man is a disheveled SQQ beating SQH over the head with a baton? Kind of. Its a baton carved into the shape of a penis. SQQ immediately stops and tries to put on his “peerless immortal cultivator” mask on with a flick of his fan, but its hard for that to be effective when your hair is all over the place and your in a room covered in penises. SQH dives for his king’s thighs and cries in relief that he’s no longer trapped in a room full of dildos and penises with SQQ. 

Then the iron triangle catches up and the realization that SVSSS gang is in modern clothing sinks in. The transmigrators freeze for just a second before jumping in front of iron triangle with a thousand questions. They ask in their shitty English which leaves answering the questions mostly to wu xie because pangzi’s english is pretty spotty and xiaoge doesn’t like talking in general, let alone a foreign language.

The whole group eventually leaves the tomb and all its phallic glory behind and get above ground where there’s phone service again. After a bit of searching, the transmigrators realize that while this world is very similar to their original world, there’s no signs of “Proud Immortal Demon Way” ever being written here, no other signs pointing to the two of them existing in this world. SVSS gang are very concerned as they watch SQQ and SQH talk in a strange language to these relative strangers, but don’t feel like its the time to figure out whats going on until everyone gets back home. The now expanded group makes their way back to Wushanju in an even more cramped road trip back. SQQ absolutly ends up in LBH’s lap at least once and SQH ends up with MBJ’s head in his lap at some point. its all very cute as the feeling of everyone being accounted for and safe settles in. 

Maybe there’s some stuff about SQQ and SQH being transmigrators and them being tempted for all of half a second to stay in this world that is so very much like their original world but choosing to go back with their lovers and the lives they’ve made for themselves. 

As the complete SVSSS gang now gets ready to head back home, the Iron triangle makes a huuuuge goody bag of all the snacks and treats that SQQ and SQH have been missing ever since they’ve transmigrated and put together a basic netbook plus solar charger for them to take back. There won’t be internet service back in SVSS world, but they loaded it up with a whooole bunch of web novels and pop songs, along with a few spare parts. 

SVSSS gang finally makes their way home after having a large farewell dinner at Wushanju at Pangzi’s insistence and LBH bullies his way into helping out. Its a very sweet scene of laughing and drinking. After dinner is done, SVSSS decide to go back immediately because the time dilation thing would mean they would be away for longer than they would like. 

Once back home, LBH, SQQ, and LQG have a confrontation/conversation about their relationships with each other and figure out if they want to try being all together, all three of them. MBJ confines SQH to his northern palace. Specifically their bedroom. He was also the one that remembered to grab the artifact that caused all these problems to begin with while everyone else was distracted by dildo tomb.

Iron triangle goes back to their retirement, at peace with the decisions they’ve made and the lives they’ve chosen to live.

THE END!!!