#if it is not obvious this is satire

[secretmellowblog]

On the subject of the Titanic ‘submersible’ that was lost in the deep with all its wealthy tourists— it’s so insane/eerie in hindsight to read this article from the Smithsonian that interviews the CEO Stockton Rush long before the disaster.

Despite the Smithsonian supposedly being an organization that cares about science and truth, and the fact that there were SO MANY obvious red flags from the beginning and so many people criticizing the company…..the article is a puff piece uncritically glorifying the CEO’s obviously terrible submersible project. It compares him in glowing terms to Elon Musk. It is an article about how private ventures like those of Stockton Rush and Elon Musk can and should be the future of the world.

We’ve obviously learned now that there were whistleblowers at the company who were warning for a long time that Stockton Rush’s submersible was unsafe— only to be fired and then sued. It makes sense the submersible was so unsafe, because the CEO in this interview is open about how he has no background in underwater engineering and is annoyed by quote “regulations that needlessly prioritize passenger safety.”

Soon after, the private [submersible] market died too, Rush found, for two reasons that were “understandable but illogical.” First, subs gained a reputation for danger. Working on offshore rigs in harsh locations like the North Sea, saturation divers, who breathe gas mixtures to avoid diving sicknesses, would be taken in subs to work at great depths. It was the world’s most perilous job, with frequent fatalities. (“It wasn’t the sub’s fault,” says Rush.) To save lives, the industries moved toward using underwater robots to perform the same work.

Second, tourist subs, which could once be skippered by anyone with a U.S. Coast Guard captain’s license, were regulated by the Passenger Vessel Safety Act of 1993, which imposed rigorous new manufacturing and inspection requirements and prohibited dives below 150 feet. The law was well-meaning, Rush says, but he believes it needlessly prioritized passenger safety over commercial innovation (a position a less adventurous submariner might find open to debate). “There hasn’t been an injury in the commercial sub industry in over 35 years. It’s obscenely safe, because they have all these regulations. But it also hasn’t innovated or grown—because they have all these regulations.”

The fact that Stockton Rush (who was piloting the submarine when the disaster happened) is on record complaining about the evils of regulations that prioritize people’s safety, and the Smithsonian uncritically regurgitated that rhetoric in their glowing puff piece about how rich tycoons like Elon Musk and Stockton Rush are going to save the world is just…..in hindsight of how everything ended it’s just so much horrible black comedy? It’s like a satire about the dangers of uncritically worshipping the rich.

It is mentioned in the article that Rush chose to make his submersible in a different shape, and with a different (cheaper) material than is usually used for submersibles. The article frames this as a result of daring innovation, and not of negligence/ignorance. This passage in particular, which in context is supposed to portray Rush’s critics as joyless naysayers who were proven wrong by the noble tycoon, is pretty foreboding in hindsight:

Rush planned to pilot the sub himself, which critics said was an unnecessary risk: Under pressure, the experimental carbon fiber hull might, in the jargon of the sub world, “collapse catastrophically.”

And then!!

The exact problem that happened to Titan this weekend, happened on Titan’s very first test voyage to the Titanic! The experimental carbon fiber hull had an issue and it caused communications to break down!

The dive was going according to plan until about 10,000 feet, when the descent unexpectedly halted, possibly, Rush says, because the density of the salt water added extra buoyancy to the carbon fiber hull. He now used thrusters to drive Titan deeper, which interfered with the communications system, and he lost contact with the support crew. He recalls the next hour in hallucinogenic terms. “It was like being on the Starship Enterprise,” he says. “There were these particles going by, like stars. Every so often a jellyfish would go whipping by. It was the childhood dream.”

Both Rush and the article writer treat this as a fun quirky story, instead of a serious safety failure and red flag with his experimental macgyvered regulation-flaunting submersible.

Other highlights from the article include:

Stockton rush saying that if 3/4 of the planet is water, why haven’t we monetized it?

Stockton saying we will “colonize the ocean long before we colonize space”

Lots of weird pro colonialism stuff in general??? This article loves colonialism and thinks it’s cool

Rush saying he plans for this to eventually help find more underwater resources for the US to exploit and profit from

Elon musk comparisons. The article writer does not mention that Elon Musk’s rockets explode and therefore it would be a bad idea to get in one of them, because that would imply it’s a bad idea to get into the submersible

Stockton rush seeing himself as Captain Kirk

The article writer comparing the tourists who plan to join Rush to Englishmen who went on colonialist journeys to Africa as if that’s like, a good thing. So much pro colonialism stuff in this article

So many sentences about Stockton Rush being handsome when he literally just looks like some guy

The article beginning with an editor’s note from years later disclaiming that the extraordinary submersible they’re advertising in this article is uh. It’s now uhhhh

But yeah it really does just bring home how so many organizations that supposedly care about scientific truth or journalistic integrity are willing to uncritically platform propaganda for wealthy CEOS. It’s frustrating how easily people fall for the fake myths that careless wealthy people invent for themselves, and even more frustrating that supposedly respectable institutions will platform irresponsible lies that end up getting people killed.

Rush is such an obvious and simple example of this, and his negligence is “only” killing five people including himself. But to me it feels like a cautionary tale to bear in mind when it comes to uncritical puff piece media coverage of similar “daring tycoon innovations” by people like Bezos or Musk.

[gornwen]

So let's say Elon Musk gets... adjusted. I think we should divide his wealth equally amongst every USian, Canadian, and South African for damages done to us personally by his existence. We would each get approximately 739 USD.

If we acknowledge that Elon Musk is a very real hazard to the entire planet, which is true, each person could be compensated 40 USD. I'm very okay with this.

[afieldinengland]

i would never try and get someone else hooked on the pointless internecine squabbles and feuds of british politics like i so obviously am, because i’d never inflict that on another human being. but i think you miss so much of the context of the thick of it without them. like why it is, in 1x01, that malcolm says that dosac can’t do much without ‘the treasury thinking [the pm’s] started a palace coup’, and why the pm then signs off on a dosac policy on the fly because ‘he thinks it’s the treasury trying to stiff him one’ (the tbgbs). why malcolm and julius are so different, have ‘i know him so well’ esque fights over who’s closer to the prime minister, and piss each other off / get on so uniquely (alastair campbell and peter mandelson). why dan miller tersely reminds nicola murray that she ‘only beat [him] on a technicality’ (david and ed miliband). et cetera

[this-tastes-lemony]

Hope everyone has a Super Strahm Saturday today

[99-wrath]

gc don’t fw my edits

[whore-crusher]

yeah i may kill myself after this one chat

[orcboxer]

helpful tips for having a healthy mindset on the internet

everyone who disagrees with you shares the same opinions as the stupidest person who disagrees with you

every post you see is secretly a hot take about that thing you've been fuming about

nothing is ever complicated and the only correct discourse is whatever supports your immediate reaction to the topic at hand. nuance is just an attempt to silence you.

every vulnerable minority affected by a given issue is a monolith that agrees with your specific opinions about said issue

only you have the best interests of vulnerable minorities at heart. if people who disagree with you really cared about other people, they wouldn't disagree with you.

never meet people where they're at. nobody shares no common goals or ideals with you. demand their immediate and total submission, and failing that, tell them to kill themselves.

if someone doesn't grovel at your feet even after you wrote a 50-page rant about them, that means they are "doubling down"

if you're not constantly performing righteous outrage, you don't care enough

there are two kinds of people in the world: ontologically good people, and people who should be tortured and killed

the most humane solution to any given conflict is to burn everything down until only the good guys are left, and then start over

good things are actually bad, while bad things are actually good, and it's very clever to realize this.

truth always feels validating

praxis never causes emotional dissonance

catharsis is always good

if you hear a voice in your head that says, "you know what this post needs? a comparison to hitler" that's the voice of god speaking

[treeembrace]

Been reading the news lately.

I can't believe people would celebrate the death of a man who was just trying to do his job.

Look at this photo I found of a group of young men, all smiles over this event.

Absolutely disgusting. And they call themselves Americans. What is this country coming to? 😤

[unabashedmagicalgirlfan]

is that a fucking isat reference copypasta

‼️‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING IN STARS AND TIME REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 ISAT IS THE BEST FUCKING GAME 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 BONNIE IS SO CUTE 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊 START AGAIN START AGAIN START AGAIN START AGAIN 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩 CRAB CRAB CRAB CRAB CRAB 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST  HOWCANIHELPYOUSTARDUST KNIFE TO MEET YOU KNIFE TO MEET YOU KNIFE TO MEET YOU Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! Yo Loop! ✨✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! Yo Loop! ✨✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop!✨Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ Yo Loop! ✨ In this moment, you were loved!!! DEPRESSED KNIFE BOY HAS A MENTAL BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN ❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓ BAD TOUCH BAD TOUCH BAD TOUCH Your eyes were bigger then your stomach…‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE! SAY IT BRIGHT ONE!  😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂 Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush? Siffrin Plush?  🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 🏝️ The island is British 🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️ The island is British 🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️The island is British 🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️ The island is British 🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️🏝️ Onehats is the best ending r/InStarsAndTime r/unexpectedISAT r/expectedISAT perfectly balanced as all things should be r/unexpectedthanos r/expectedthanos for balance r/ISATmemes

[like-tears-in-rain-storms]

When you mess up and call upon the wrong one-eyed savant sorcerer to assist you in battle:

Sources: 1, 2, 3.

[peri-fairywinkle-cosma]

MIKU BINDER IREP??? on MY TUMBLR????? it's more likely than you think! SCAN FOR VIRUSES NOW

i also made myself one to go with it~~~~

[joeyclaire]

the passenger is an interesting movie and all but you people shipping randy and benson is… fucking weird to say the least benson is textually abusive and their dynamic is paralleled with a csa case in universe not to mention randy is MINOR CODED and benson is clearly an adult so that age gap is super fucking weird. all around icky icky stuff sorry not a fan.png stop putting ra//nson shit on my dash thank youuuu 😊

[saveahorserideaneddie]

hear me out: the lab karen works for are working on genetically altered bees

bee activists try to let them out and they end up getting killed by the swarm of bees and athena shows up to take care of it and one of the bees escapes the scene.

buck ends up getting stung by the bee after it somehow makes it’s way to the 118- he goes about his day but then thing start to get weird. his sense of smell grows and he can smeel flowers from hundreds of yards away, he acquires a huge appetite for honey that he doesn’t know where it came from, and one night he finds out he has retractable wings and a retractable stinger.

and thus, Bee-Man is born

[kiruwte]

April Fools

Omg Komavid my favorite sh- *gets shot*

anyways happy April fools! I thought I would have school today so I woke up early and went but there was… no school 💀

[blimbo-buddy]

yes as we all know, SplashTail is actually the true victim for being manipulated and abused by CurlFeather. It’s so rewarding to see him finally snap back at his abuser and murder her. A lot of his actions are only because of what CurlFeather forced into his mind please don’t talk about the connotations of the scene where he knew that FrostPaw had a crush on him and told nobody. He is the victim

[heckyeahponyscans]

Imagine if the police stormed into southern Los Angeles in militaristic tanks. Bystanders watch in horror and shock as the police blast buildings and throw grenades into them.

"We are liberating this neighborhood from evil gang members," the police explain as children scream and cry. "They are using innocent people as human shields."

A man runs into the street with a bloodied child in his arms and without missing a beat a policeman shoots him.

"I knew he was a gang member because he's a man, and a non-white one to boot." The officer does not pay any mind to the child lying in a pool of blood. "We will keep shooting everything that moves until the gang members march to the police station and turn themselves in. At which point we will kill them. Given that knowledge, I'm sure their surrender is imminent. And if not, it will be their fault when I continue to shoot people. Not mine!"

"The gang members embedded themselves in the civilian population," he continues, "living in civilian houses and selling drugs and guns out of residential buildings, so what option do I have but to destroy everyone and everything here. I am but a helpless pawn. Do not deny it, lest I tell you about all the policemen killed by gang members, which I'm super sad about. We, the police, are the victims. We, and no one else."

Behind him a policewoman rams an apartment building with a bulldozer; it crumples. More screams--some from inside, from from outside as more fleeing people are shot down.

"Ah, how peaceful it will be when all the gang members are dead and no one feels rage or aggression towards our squadron." The police officer turns away as a woman weeps over her husband's body. "Now if you'll excuse me, I must set the corner store alight, shut off the utilities to the neighborhood, and raze the hospital. I have it on good authority that the Crips go there to tend their booboos."

(Free Gaza now.)