#if i was in sharknado i’d be the first to go

[silentgrim]

HELP IM STUCCKCK IN SHARKNADO HELELLLPPP HELPPP MEEEEE

#pufferaskboxworldtour

hah sorry— you’re on your own 🥴

[phantom-kitten]

Can I ask you what your experience at Timberline was like?

oh wow, are you in my archive? someone I know personally would already know the answer and I don’t think I’ve posted about it in a minute.

timberline knolls saved my life, no exaggeration

I have to say, though, I went there with Intention - I was fully ready to commit

————

I had been admitted to the psych ward a few times and had been doing intensive outpatient for years at that point, along with weekly therapy and being highly medicated, but I just wasn’t getting better. I had some attempts under my belt and self-injury and my eating disorder were running my life. every thought, every action, every moment of every day was centered around food and my body.

there was a moment of lucidity for me where I knew I needed something more: I pulled into the garage and my parents weren’t home and I didn’t want to leave the car. I put down the garage door and sat there with my car running for a while just in silence, then I got worried about my dog dying along with me. I couldn’t stay in the cycle, at that point the possibility of me ever moving out of my parents house and being an actual person was slim to none, no one thought I’d be able to do it and they were right. I had recently heard of TK from Demi Lovato and Kesha and it was local to me, so I called right then and asked about admission, they gave me a phone interview and said I was a good candidate and I talked to my mom later that night. it took some convincing but I think they knew we were running out of options.

a bed was available pretty quickly, I only had to wait a few weeks. I packed up my stuff and my parents drove me, dropped me off, and i began the intake process. I was boarded on willow lodge and they gave me a tour of the grounds before dropping me off. the campus is beautiful and I was there in the summer, bless, so it was warm and green. you eat on lodge the first night and it was disgusting, chicken and rice is everyone’s first meal. it was nice though to have that time to acclimate and be in willow, getting used to the space.

you room with three other women and there are maybe 30ish per lodge. there’s the common room, group rooms, and then an infrequently used tv room where I watched sharknado for the first and only time. groups were at the same time each day but the off-lodge schedule varied, some days we would go to the art room and others would be things like yoga or mixed-lodge groups on various topics.

meals were in the cafeteria and you would eat with your lodgemates, no food talk allowed. each week you would meet with your dietician and pick your daily meals per the standard: 2 chos (carbs), 2 pros (protein), a fruit, a fat, and a dairy. the food was good I suppose, but challenge meals were exactly that and I did have to eat on lodge a few times for refusing food.

I was at TK for 32 days and left ama because I was starting school again and didn’t want to miss anything. when I told them I wanted to leave, I tried to explain that I felt like I was at a point where I was ready, but my team sat me down and told me they would prefer for me to stay for two more months. in the end, I did decide to leave on a high that may have been somewhat manic, but I really did internalize my time at timberline in an important and effective way.

was I totally better? no, but my eating was and oh boy was that a huge improvement. my experience at tk was mainly focused on my eating disorder and my time there did wonders for my body and physical health. eating disorders don’t go away - they just simply do not - but you can learn how to live with the thoughts and make the better choices. with that under better control, I was able to turn my attention more to living without the burden I was placing on myself.

all in all, I owe my life to timberline knolls and to myself for having an intentional stay. it works if you work it.

[kiki-shortsnout]

Hi! For intimacy prompt, maybe "a hand written note" for IronStrange? ☺🥰

Thank you 🦋

Sorry these are taking me so long everyone! @hyuksgirlelf also asked for this prompt! Thank you! Both of you!

***

Tony threw his Starkpad down on the table, stretching back in his chair and rubbing his eyes.

It hadn’t even been that long.

He knew Stephen lost track of time when he was in the other dimensions, that the flow of time there was different, or some other miscellaneous reason he’d explained to Tony late one night when he’d been sulking about another one of Stephen’s trips.

‘FRIDAY? How long has it been?’

‘Doctor Strange has been gone for seventy hours and twenty-eight minutes.’

It hadn’t even been a week yet.

The entire time Stephen had been gone, Tony had been inside his workshop, refusing to answer calls or surface for food, living on snacks he’d stocked his mini fridge with, taking naps on the couch when he needed to. He still had a week to go, if Stephen’s estimations about his time away were correct.

‘Boss?’ FRIDAY asked gently and he knew what she was going to say, even as he folded his arms across his chest and jutted his chin out. ‘You promised Doctor Strange you would look after yourself while he was gone.’

‘I know, Fri, I know,’ Tony groaned, closing his eyes and trying to rearrange the thoughts in his head. These feelings made no sense. He’d been away from people for long periods of time before, had left Pepper behind for conferences and other Stark Industries related things. He didn’t understand where this… neediness came from. Maybe it was his age, the string of failed relationships behind him, but he couldn’t stop thinking about Stephen, wondering if he was okay, if he was in trouble.

It felt like a ball of tangled feelings was caught inside his chest, and Tony wanted to reach a hand inside himself and rip them out, examine them with a logical mind in the cold light of day. He knew he was needy, that he craved attention but these…longing feelings for someone else.

Those were all new.

‘I’ll send him a message informing him that you didn’t do as promised,’ FRIDAY threatened.

‘How you going to do that? He’s literally light-years away, or universes…Christ I dunno,’ Tony sighed, chewing the skin at the edge of his thumb.

‘I’ll find a way,’ FRIDAY swore.

‘Oh, I don’t doubt that,’ Tony said with a groan. He was definitely getting old, he could feel it in his bones. Wheeling his chair back, he spun it around, getting to his feet.

‘Doctor Strange left me instructions for you if you found yourself getting restless in his absence,’ FRIDAY told him as he wandered out of the workshop towards the elevator.

‘Don’t you dare tell him about this! It’s pathetic enough that I’m nearly fifty and moping around like a lovesick puppy, I don’t need you telling on me too.’

‘I wouldn’t do that boss,’ FRIDAY reassured him.

‘You literally called him last month!’ Tony glanced up at the ceiling of the elevator, watching the numbers illuminate as it took him to his floor of the compound.

‘Because you were running a fever and had passed out on the floor!’ FRIDAY snapped at him, the Irish lilt he’d programmed her with thickened the edges of her words.

‘Alright, alright, I give. What does he want me to do?’

‘Sit down and watch a movie. He told me he’d picked one out for you.’

Tony jammed his hands in his pockets, whistling as he made his way down the corridor to his quarters, wondering what film Stephen had picked. Offering his palm to be scanned, Tony shouldered his way in through the security door, glancing around the living room.

Empty.

He didn’t want to be in here, it only emphasized that he was alone, that he was pathetic and unable to cope, mooning around like a lovesick…

‘What’s that?’ Tony’s thoughts took an abrupt turn, noticing the Blu-ray box and a sticky note on top. ‘Why has he left me a Blu-ray? honestly, that man and technology… I’d be insulted if I were you Fri.’

It was Sharknado one of the first films they’d watched together when they’d skirted the edges of dating and friends. Tony had fond memories of that evening and he could feel himself smiling as he walked over to pick it up off the couch, the contented memories dispersing some of the depression clouds that had been hanging over him. They’d ripped this movie to pieces, goading each other on, laughing at the ludicrous plot. Halfway through it, Tony had taken a chance, made a move.

They’d never watched the end.

‘He didn’t,’ Tony whispered, picking up the sticky note, careful not to crush it in his hand.

Hey Tony,

The words were hard to decipher, and he could only just imagine how painstaking it must have been for Stephen to write them, how agonizing it must have been for someone who used to have such beautiful cursive writing to be reduced to this.

You’re wondering why I’ve written you a note and not left a message with Friday? Thought this was more romantic, and I know you love all that stuff, even if you pretend otherwise. I know you’re missing me, and you’re finding it hard. I’m not belittling those feelings. I feel it too.

Take this and go watch it in bed, remember the good times between us rather than wallowing in misery, torturing yourself about when I’m coming home.

I miss you more than I could write in a thousand letters.

Stephen.

It wasthe most romantic thing Tony had ever received, and he cradled the note in his palm. The loneliness, the fear of abandonment didn’t feel quite so bad now, softer around the edges, a dull ache rather than the incessant stabbing of before.

The lights in his bedroom switched on as he opened the door, and despite the fact he could’ve just asked FRIDAY to play the movie, he took the time to set up his Blu-ray player and TV screen. Satisfied he’d set it all up correctly, (honestly, it would’ve been much easier to ask FRIDAY to do it) Tony went in search of something comfortable to wear, finding clothes folded on his bed, another note on top.

You always say you sleep better in my clothes, so I’ve left you my Pink Floyd t-shirt. My pajama pants won’t fit you, so I’ve left you the super soft ones you like when it’s cold. I know you think you’re alone in your feelings, but I’m just as upset as you are that I’m not in bed with you watching the movie. It doesn’t sound like much, but it’s one of my favorite things to do with you.

Stephen.

This was one of Tony’s favorite things to do while unwinding after a mission, or after a stressful day of meetings. Just having Stephen close, even if they didn’t say much to each other, being in the same space was enough to keep real life at bay for a few hours.

‘I wish you were here,’ Tony whispered down to the note. Ignoring the clothes for now, he got on top of his bed, kicking the covers back and shoving his hands under his pillow, dropping his face into it as he tried to stop his emotions running rampant. The rustle of paper caught his attention, the edge of another sheet of paper brushing his fingertips beneath his pillow.

Sitting up, he slid the letter out, unfolding it as he crossed his legs.

I’m missing you as much as you’re missing me. You’re never far from my thoughts, Tony. Please, try and get some sleep for me.

I love you.

Tony smiled and rubbed his eyes, carefully refolding the letter and leaving it on Stephen’s pillow with the others. ‘FRIDAY, kill the lights for me, would you?’ Snatching up Stephen’s Pink Floyd t-shirt, he snuggled it against his chest, lying back in the bed, feeling at ease for the first time in hours.

His breathing began to slow, his limbs sinking into the mattress as he wandered towards sleep, comforted by Stephen’s scent, and the reassurance that he wasn’t alone in his feelings, his fears. He could imagine the feeling of Stephen’s hand in his hair, and just before he fell into slumber, he thought he heard Stephen’s voice drifting down to him.

‘I’m home, douchebag. Go back to sleep.’

[collecting-stories]

Friends Don’t - JJ Maybank

Request: Could you possibly write a fic with jj×reader based on the song Friends Don't by Maddie and Tea? I think that song could draw a lot of inspiration! 💜🌻

A/N: Tried to do this broken up into moments in their relationship. 

Outer Banks Masterlist

///

“You stare at him an awful lot.” Sarah observed, sitting down beside you on a branch in the boneyard. A party was underway, JJ standing by the keg with John B, talking to random partygoers as they came up.  

You looked away from JJ for a moment to meet Sarah’s gaze. “No.” You shook your head.  

“I mean, he looks at you a lot too. Honestly, I thought you were together until John B said you weren’t.” Sarah replied.

You looked back toward the boys at the keg, as if that would somehow prove that you and JJ didn’t look at each other all the time, only to find that he was staring at you. When your eyes met, he smiled and winked at you and you held your hand up in a tiny wave. Beside you Sarah grinned as she sipped on her beer.  

“So, why aren’t you two dating?” She asked.  

“We’re just friends.” You insist as you cast another look JJ’s way. He meets your eyes and then shifts his gaze before looking back. You smile and nod and Sarah watches as you stand up, “I’ll be right back.”

“Does that mean come here?”

“What?” You looked at her and shook your head, “no. I was just gonna...we’re just gonna take a walk.”  

“Away from everyone else.” She confirmed.

“Maybe?”  

You walked over to where JJ was sitting, thinking nothing of it when he took your hand and led you away from the party. Your fingers laced with his as he led you down the beach to a quieter spot. Chills ran up your spine at the feeling of his skin against yours but you reminded yourself that you were just friends. You knew how this would go. He’d smoke and you’d watch the tide and chat about nothing.  

~

Kiara gave you a hug, the last to leave the hang out at your house. John B and Sarah had left first and then Pope. JJ had gone sometime around then, you assumed, because Kiara left almost right after and JJ was nowhere in sight as you picked up the empty bowl of popcorn from the coffee table and walked into the kitchen.  

You were washing the dishes when you saw someone pass the kitchen door and you stopped, leaning out into the hallway to see JJ in the living room. “Hey, I thought you left.”

“Nah, had to pee.”

“Lovely.”

JJ laughed, “you need help?”

You didn’t, you were almost done. “Sure. If you want you can stay? We could watch a movie or something...did you see the last Sharknado?” You asked as JJ joined you in the kitchen.

“Yeah...but I’d watch it again. It was shit.”  

“I bet.” You bit your lip as JJ stood beside you at the sink, closer than he needed to.  

When the dishes were done you laid on opposite sides of the couch, JJ pressing his feet against yours and pushing. ‘Foot wars’ as he had dubbed them when you were kids. In always ended the same, JJ eventually getting on his knees and tackling you into the cushions to tickle you. When you were kids you used to run around the house, trying out wrestling moves until one of you forfeited. Now his attack ended in him collapsing half on top of you and cuddling sleepy, pretending it was just a friendly thing as he watched the movie and avoided your eyes.  

~

“JJ,” you called his name through the phone, breaking the minutes of silence that had been eating up time. “What’re you doing?” You’d asked him the same question four times already.

“Laying in bed.” JJ replied, voice low so Luke wouldn’t hear him on the phone this late at night. You’d called him claiming that you wanted to talk but you hadn’t said anything important in the last two hours and he was still laying there with the phone against his ear, waiting. For what, he wasn’t sure.

“I got my acceptance letter for NCS. I have to live in the dorms the first year, which I told my mom, is lame. But here’s my plan-” you finally said, sitting up in bed to look over at the pictures you had pinned to your corkboard. Your bedroom was evidence of your friendship with JJ. Bracelets he’d bought you sat in a tray on the dresser, articles of clothing you’d stolen from him scattered around the room, you were wearing one of his sweatshirts right now. Pictures hung on a corkboard, were taped to your mirror, sat in frames on your shelves. “We get an apartment the year after and we can live together.”

“On the mainland?” He made a face that you couldn’t see but you could hear.

“No you’re right, it’s dumb.”

“No, it’s not. We should. It’d be awesome.” He said quickly, sitting up.  

“You think so?”

He could hear his dad in the living room, “definitely. Hey, what’re you doing?”

“Sitting in bed.”

“Wanna meet up somewhere?”  

“Okay.” You agreed, already getting out of bed to put on pants and shoes.  

You met JJ at a gas station halfway between the cut and figure eight. He was standing outside the convenience store, leaning against the wall beside the ice machine as you walked up and he smiled when he saw you.  

~

“No JJ?” Sarah asked, finding you alone at a small get together at the chateau. You were sitting in one of hammocks, feet scuffing against the dirt patch as you swayed back and forth.  

“I think he’s inside.” You shrugged, “we’re not like, attached at the hip.”

“Sure you are.”

“Hey Sarah,” just like that JJ’s voice rung out and you both looked over toward the house as JJ walked out with two cups. He handed one to you, kissing the top of your head and taking a seat next to you on the hammock.

“Hey JJ, is John B inside?”  

He nodded but he wasn’t paying attention. Sarah could only smile as she backed away from the scene, JJ’s eyes already on you as you sipped at your drink. He pushed the hammock a little more and you lifted your feet, leaning your knees against him as he laid back.  

You leaned back against him, letting him put his arm around your shoulders. You tilted your head to look at him, smiling. The party carried on as the two of you sat there watching each other, JJ’s eyes changing to something softer the longer he looked at you. He stopped pushing the hammock, stilling it as he dug his boots into the dirt. You thought maybe he was going to get up but he stayed where he was, eyes still on you.  

“Can I kiss you?” He asked, voice barely a whisper.  

You shifted closer, free hand reaching up to lay against his cheek as you leaned in and kissed him. JJ smiled against your lips, his grip on your shoulders tightening as he kissed you back.  

From the porch Sarah nudged John B to get his attention. “They’re so cute.”  

-

taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife  @freckled-and-daydreaming  @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @howdyherron @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @tragicmisfits @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @ssprayberrythings @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @belledutchess @poguelifeeee @jjsthumbring @faded-blue @parkerpetertingle @thebookwormlife @summer-clouds-and-long-days

[ais-for-alex]

The Scars of Our Past: chapter 21

So this is a very important chapter to the story and I don’t want to spoil anything but there are descriptions of traumatic events, death, and injuries so please read with caution if you are sensitive to anything of that nature. Anyway I hope y’all enjoy 🥰

You’re getting in too deep, Knut.

Leo blinked away the thought as he followed Logan up the stairs towards Finn's apartment. His mind wandered back to the two of them sitting in that courtyard with the soft music and the radiant warmth of the fire as their companions. And when he had glanced over to see the orange glow of firelight dancing over Logan’s face Leo’s heart ached at that look in his eyes. He could see that Logan felt so much inside but he was held back by the crippling fear of the unknown and the unspoken, Leo couldn’t stop himself from reaching out.

Damn, you are such a hypocrite. Talking about fear like you haven’t been living in the shadow of loss for so long you barely know what sunlight looks like anymore. Too scared to move on, too scared to let go.

This is different, Leo told himself, silencing those nagging words just as they got to the front door.

“Hey Fish, you here?” he called out as they slipped inside and began shedding jackets and scarves before wandering farther into the apartment.

“In here,” Finn said just as he and Logan walked into the living room to find him hanging upside-down from the recliner, one leg thrown over the back and the other over the arm. There was some tv show playing quietly in the background but Finn wasn’t really watching rather he was holding his phone precariously over his face playing some word game.

Leo laughed, “Is your default state just upside down?”

“Yes.”

“Yes,” both Finn and Logan said at the same time, causing him to look up and see them.

“Lo?” he asked, Finn rolled off the chair in surprise falling to the floor with a thump, Leo could hear a bit of uncertainty in his voice.

“Hey,” Logan said softly, locking eyes with Finn, “Leo mentioned food so I tagged along, hope that’s ok?”

“’Course,” he answered without a thought, scrambling up off the floor, “you know you’re always welcome here.”

There was a tension between them, Leo could feel it bend and stretch like an elastic band tied between these two men. It flexed as they moved, pulled taught like they were testing how far it would stretch before snapping. This thing between Finn and Logan was strong though, nearly tangible with the intensity of whatever past lay in the space separating them. Something inside him was telling Leo that rather than breaking under their pull it was more likely that the elastic band would snap back into place, leaving behind sore red welts as raw and tender as the emotions tying them together in the first place.

“Alright,” Leo said, bumping his hip lightly against Logan still standing next to him, “I’m gonna go start working on dinner.”

Logan finally looked away from Finn's hot cocoa eyes to glance up at Leo, “Now this I’ve got to see,” he said with a laugh.

“Oh come on,” Leo huffed an exasperated chuckle, “just cause you guys can’t cook doesn’t mean nobody else can.”

“How do you know I can’t cook, hmm? I might be a master chef in disguise,” Logan joked.

Finn scoffed at that before slinging an arm over Logan’s shoulders and pulling him into a headlock, “come on Lo, no one’s gonna believe that.”

Leo rolled his eyes and made his way into the kitchen, Finn and Logan’s chatter followed close behind as he began pulling ingredients out of the newly stocked fridge and cabinets.

“This looks suspiciously healthy,” Logan commented while Leo washed and prepped a variety of veggies, he and Finn had settled at the counter to watch and talk as he cooked.

“Don’t make that face,” Leo laughed at the grimace Logan made, “healthy can be good.”

“Lo has an aversion to vegetables,” Finn teased, knocking their shoulders together.

“I do not,” he huffed back, “just if given the choice they’re not my first pick.”

“Well, then what would be your first pick? What’s your favorite food?” Leo asked as he began working on the chicken.

Logan closed his eyes and leaned his head back, “probably, filet mignon. Mmm,” he hummed low in his throat like he was imagining it.

“Ok, I’ll give that to you, few things trump steak,” Leo said, “maybe I’ll make it next time.” When Leo glanced up he met sparkling emerald eyes and Logan’s happy grin, it made his breath catch in his throat.

“So, whatcha making tonight?” Finn asked, resting his chin to rest in his hand against the counter while watching Leo work.

“I thought I’d do a honey and sesame chicken with a teriyaki stir fry,” Leo replied, snagging some seasoning off the counter.

“Ahh,” Finn sighed, wilting down to lay against the counter, “that sounds delicious.”

Both Leo and Logan laughed at his dramatics, their conversation dissolved into Finn and Logan’s upcoming game as Leo made dinner. Leo was only listening with half an ear but it sounded like they were concerned about their goalie who was struggling with an injury to his thigh. Soon the kitchen was filled with sizzling and the warm smell of cooking food making their stomachs grumble, by the time Leo had finished all three of them were salivating over the delicious looking meal.

As Leo was putting the finishing touches on the stir fry and pulled it from the heat of the stove he watched Finn slide off his stool at the counter before making his way over to the cabinets and grabbing plates. Logan wandered over to the fridge and snagged drinks for each of them. He was a little struck by how smoothly the three of them worked together; they moved and orbited around each other, somehow knowing exactly what the others needed and providing it before they could ask.

Once he had gotten his food Leo wandered back into the living room and settled on the far end of the couch, Finn and Logan joined only a moment later their plates piled high with food. Finn flopped on the opposite side of the couch, squishing back into the cushions comfortably. Logan chose to settle down and sit on the carpet near Finn’s legs, his back resting against the bottom of the couch as he placed his plate on the coffee table in front of him before pulling out his phone.

“Alright, what are we watching?” he asked, tilting his head back to look at Finn and Leo.

“Whatever is fine with me,” Finn said before shoveling a forkful of stir fry into his mouth.

Logan turned and fixed him with a disbelieving stare, “Fish, we both know you are literally the biggest movie snob on the planet, and will have very strong opinions on whatever we end up watching. We also know that if you make me choose again, we will be watching Fast and Furious.”

“Nooooo, not again!” Finn groaned, making Leo snort a laugh.

“What about you Le,” Logan asked, “any movie preferences?”

For a moment Leo’s brain shorted out at the nickname and the casual way it fell from Logan’s lips, he blinked hard realizing that he was supposed to be answering a question, “umm, well I always love a trashy disaster movie.”

“Sharknado!” Finn shouted, bouncing with excitement while trying not to spill his food.

“Yeah, that works for me,” he laughed.

“Alright, Sharknado it is,” Logan pulled it up on his phone and cast it to the Tv, while they all settled in with their dinners.

Leo tried to focus on the movie, he really did. However, it seemed that his attention couldn’t help but be pulled back to the two men next to him. He felt a little smile forming on his face as he watched them bicker back and forth about something silly a character on screen said, as he watched Finn lean down and ask for the veggies Logan had picked out of his food, watched them shoot glances at each other when they thought the other wouldn’t see. It was weird, this feeling that had begun pooling in his chest while watching them; Leo felt warm and giddy with it, it felt like summer sunlight was caught inside him making everything glow golden.

A soft contented sigh fell from his lips as Leo leaned over to stack his empty plate with Finn and Logan’s on the coffee table, he shifted in his spot turning to burrow into the squishy cushions and bring his feet up to rest on the spot in the middle of the sofa. Before he could stop himself, Leo let his legs extend to press his socked feet under Finn's warm thigh. And when Finn glanced up at him, a soft little smile at his lips, Leo flushed suddenly submerged in chocolate fondue eyes. Something inside him squirmed happily when Finn simply smiled a bit wider and rested his hand on Leo’s ankle before turning back to the movie.

Leo happily let himself drift in and out of a light doze while they watched, it seemed like one minute he blinked and the next Logan was turning the volume on the tv down as the credits rolled over the screen. Taking a deep breath that turned into a huge yawn Leo shifted a bit and reached up, stretching out the soreness from sitting in the same position too long.

He heard a soft chuckle from the floor and looked down only to meet Logan's bright eyes sparkling with the grin on his lips, “so you’re the type to sleep through the movie.”

“Guilty,” Leo said, suppressing another yawn.

“Ok, question,” Finn said in a mock serious voice, making Leo glance up at him, “promise not to be weirded out.”

“Alright shoot.”

Finn shifted watching Leo, he had his phone in his hand, “Do you not have social media? Cause I swear I have been trying to cyber stalk you since like the first time we met and I am finding nothing, zilch, nadda. The internet says you don’t exist. Which I find vaguely interesting cause I low key pride myself on my ability to find out pretty much anything about anybody, but for you… nothing.”

Leo couldn’t hold back the laugh that bubbled up out of him at the frustrated pout on Finn's face, “Yeah, I do have social media. I’m surprised you couldn’t find me; everything is just under my name.”

“That’s what I tried!” he cried.

“Did you spell it right?”

“I mean yeah? I think so, there’s only one way to spell it right? L-E-O Leo N-E-W-T Newt.”

Leo snorted out another laugh, “Fish, my last name is spelled K-N-U-T.”

Finn’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a moment then relaxed as he shot a look that seemed to be filled with a mixture of exasperation and disbelief, “wait a minute are you telling me your last name is Knut , and has been this entire time.”

“It's still pronounced like newt.”

Finn sighed, shaking his head. “Knut,” he glanced down at Logan and for a moment it seemed like they had an entire conversation in that one look, then chuckled softly, “Nutty.”

“Peanut,” Logan huffed a laugh.

“Ooo, Peanut Butter,” Finn shot back.

“Nutter Butter!” Logan supplied slapping Finn's thigh in excitement, “man, there is just so much potential for nicknames in that.”

“Right!” Finn exclaimed, “how did we not know this?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Leo chuckled, “laugh it up. I’ve heard all of them before.”

“Did you hear that Lo? I think Butternut Squash over here is challenging us.”

“That’s what it sounded like to me,” Logan said, turning to look up at Leo, “are you challenging us Peanut Brittle?”

At that Leo completely lost it, he could barely breathe through his snorts of laughter, “Oh, god! I suddenly feel like I’ve made a grave mistake.”

“Awe, don’t worry Banana Nut Muffin, we take nicknames very seriously,” Finn said in a sympathetic voice as he reached out and patted Leo’s leg softly, this only prompted Leo to laugh even harder.

It took a couple minutes before their laughter died down to only the occasional chuckle. Leo was warm and relaxed; his body pressed into the crease between the cushions, he could hear the little bubble click sounds as Finn typed on his phone.

Both Leo and Logan’s eyes suddenly snapped onto Finn when a sharp gasp was sucked into his lungs.

“You ok up there, Fish?” Logan asked

“I- um yeah… it’s just-“ Finn was still looking down at his phone, “um… Le?”

“Hm?” Leo hummed, waiting for Finn to say whatever it was he wanted to ask.

“Is this… is this about you?” he asked, holding his phone out for Leo to look at.

Looking at the screen Leo saw that Finn had typed out his name into a google search but rather than links to his various social media accounts the first result that Finn had clicked on was a digital copy of his hometown newspaper. Leo’s blood ran cold as his eyes took in the headline he had tried to scrub from his mind back when he first saw it, the hollow words that could never actually make people understand the pain he felt that night.

Fatal Crash Claims Over 30 Lives Leaving Only One Survivor

Leo sucked in a shaky breath as Finn's phone slipped out of his lax grip, “I…” he pulled his legs in close to himself and wrapped his arms around them like he was trying to protect his heart from the cutting pain of his memories. “I… I forgot that would probably come up,” he said, voice quiet and timid, “um… it- it was a couple years ago now.”

“Hey,” Logan said, he had moved closer and was now sitting on the edge of the coffee table, “you don’t have to talk about it. If you aren’t ready yet, that’s ok,” he reached out and gently pulled one of Leo’s hands into his own.

Leo thought about that for a moment, thought about shoving it all away again, and hiding from the pain.

Sweetheart, the only way to make it hurt a little less is to start letting yourself move on. His mama’s words came back to his mind and Leo knew that it was time to move on, no more hiding no more running away, it was time to start healing.

“No,” Leo said, breathing in deep to steady his hurt bleeding heart, “I… I think it’s time. I’ve been running away from that night for so long now, it’s time I told someone. And you guys are… important to me, you should know what happened.”

Finn shifted on the couch so he was turned to watch Leo with patient eyes, Logan still had Leo’s hand wrapped in his own warm fingers gently massaging the tension from his palm. Somehow Leo was able to draw strength from them, he felt it flow into him until he felt completely safe and secure in their presence.

“It… it was a couple years back now,” Leo began, his voice was shaky; it wavered with emotion as he continued. “But, I actually used to play hockey,” Leo huffed a humorless chuckle at the surprise on Finn and Logan’s faces, “yeah, I played goalie, pretty much since the day I learned to skate. And I mean, not to toot my own horn but I was good too. Everyone said I would go on to play for the NHL, it was my dream you know?”

Finn and Logan both nodded, they knew exactly how that dream went but they stayed quiet waiting for Leo to continue.

“But, that dream got taken away. From me… and from them,” Leo choked back a sob. “We had an away game that night, just a couple hours away so the school didn’t want to pay for a hotel afterwards.”

Leo breathed in deep, he remembered the night with such crystal clarity it could have happened mere hours ago. He could still feel fatigue in his bones from a hard intense game, but the giddy adrenaline filled satisfaction of a win made it easier to deal with. The team was piling onto their bus tired but excited, Leo was grinning ear to ear as he climbed the rickety steps.

Making his way down the narrow aisle towards his spot at the back of the bus Leo caught Cody’s eyes and felt his insides squirm at the private little wink sent his way. Leo had gotten a shutout, and it felt like they were barely off the ice when Cody had pulled him by his jersey into the nearest supply closet to kiss him until Leo didn’t know which way was up, whispering promises of every filthy thing they would do together when they got home.

The bus roared to life just as Leo slung his bag up into the overhead rack and settled down onto the sticky plastic bench. The heat of the engine soaked up into his body soothing his sore muscles while the rumbling and rattling lulled him to sleep.

“We were maybe about two, three hours into the drive when-“ Leo paused a bit unsure in his story, “I guess I don’t really know. They told me a gas tanker hit us, but all I can remember was the sounds…”

Leo had no words to describe the horrible, horrible sound of metal crunching and scraping as it crumpled under impact, as it folded around the soft flesh of his teammates as easily as folding a paper crane. There are no words on earth that could describe the blood curdling screams of agony, of horror and fear echoing out from the people he loved.

“Um… anyway, I was thrown pretty hard but I was still close enough to get to the emergency exit.”

He could still feel that brief moment of weightlessness only a split second before the sharp impact as his body was tossed like a ragdoll to the opposite side of the bus, he felt it sliding, grinding against the asphalt for what seemed like an eternity before finally coming to a halt. Leo blinked against the darkness around him, his eyes were hazy and his left side was searing with pain; it felt like his arm had been ripped off.

He clutched his injured arm close, grunting in pain as he looked around trying to figure out where he was. Leo could hear people crying, screaming but his eyes were too blurry to find them. A thick fog was trying to cloud Leo’s brain as he lay amongst ripped metal and shattered window glass, he wanted to sleep, wanted to escape the horrible pain. He let his head roll back to rest against whatever hard surface he lay on, the side of the bus? The ceiling? Leo didn’t know anymore. He blinked against the fog, knowing somewhere inside him he shouldn’t fall asleep, but then he saw it. A light, it was blurry and out of focus, just like the rest of the world at that moment but it was something. His entire body flared in pain as he moved towards it crawling slowly, shards of glass digging into his palms as he finally made it to the large hole that used to be the back window of the bus.

The moment his feet hit the highway asphalt Leo collapsed, his body crumpling to the ground. He lay there for a moment panting his eyes locked onto that light that had guided him out of the wreckage just for something to hold onto.

“I’m not sure how long I was there, just staring into that light,” Leo sniffled. There were tears running down his face, Logan had threaded their fingers together and Leo was so immensely grateful for the grounding sensation of his warm palm. “Turns out it was headlights, there hadn’t been many cars out so late but a little family saw the crash and pulled over to call 911. They pulled me away from the bus,” Leo squeezed his eyes closed, and he was back staring at that light, but then there was a face blocking it out.

He didn’t recognize the person; it was too blurry, there was too much pain, but he felt their hands as they dragged him away from the remnants of the bus. It hurt, them dragging his injured body against the glass covered ground but in the very next moment that pain was completely forgotten when the world was washed in scorching heat and blinding light.

“The very last thing I remember was this loud ringing in my ears… and when I looked up there was fire, raining down around us.”

“I woke up in the hospital with a concussion and a dislocated shoulder,” Leo said through little gasps, “they told me… they told me that I was the only one to survive, it was a one in a million chance that I made it out of that wreck. They said it was a miracle, but it didn’t feel like a miracle. I lost everyone that night, anyone who hadn’t died from the initial crash… they did in the explosion. Those people, they were more than my team, they were my family. And they all died, even- even Cody.” Leo couldn’t hold back the sob, “he was my person, I thought we would spend our lives together. But he was taken away from me, all of it was taken away from me.”

“Oh Leo,” Finn gasped, there were tears streaming down his face too as he crawled across the space separating them and pulled Leo forward into his arms, “come here sweetheart.”

Logan’s hand slipped from his but settled between his shoulder blades instead as Leo let himself be pulled into Finn's embrace, he burrowed his face into the crook of his shoulder and felt the hurt flow through him. Soul shattering sobs wracked through his body as the memories of that night crashed over him again and again. After all this time of shoving it down, hiding them inside himself, he was finally letting everything out.

“You know,” Leo said sniffling into Finn's neck, “after I got out of the hospital, I felt so… lost. I’d lost my partner, my friends, the thought of getting back on the ice nearly made me sick.” Leo tightened his arms around Finn's waist, “But the worst part… the worst part was the way that people looked at me. You can’t even imagine what it feels like when the people who used to consider you a part of their family, look at you and you can see it in their eyes that they wish you were dead. They look at you and you know that in a heartbeat they would let you die just to have their son back.”

Leo pulled back from Finn's arms a bit and drew in a deep shuddering breath, “and honestly, I can’t even blame them. Cause if given the choice, I would trade my life to give them the opportunity to live theirs.” Taking a deep shuddering breath Leo squeezed his eyes closed, “even though I walked away, sometimes I think a part of me died with my brothers on the bus that night. And now I’m stuck trying to live as this broken shell of a person.”

“Le?” Leo could feel Logan’s hand soothing up and down his back, “Leo, please look at me.” Logan’s voice was soft and pleading, and as much as he simply wanted to keep his eyes squeezed closed and hide from everything the tenderness he heard there made Leo blink open to look into emerald green eyes glazed with a sheen of tears.

“I’m no good with words. But I hope I can make you understand this, Leo you are not broken . You have suffered unimaginable pain; pain that’s left scars on your heart, and those take time to heal. But those scars do not make you broken ,” Logan reached out to cup Leo’s face in his warm palms, his fingers brushing away the tear tracks running down his cheeks, “you are whole, and healing, and perfect.”

Leo felt a piece of his heart click into place at Logan’s words, he leaned out of Finns arms a bit more and pulled Logan into him holding him close letting his warm comfort soak into him soothing away just a bit of the pain. Somehow while he was surrounded by them the hurt inside lost its sharp cutting edge, it eased to a dull throb still there but easier.

“You know, you said that we’re important to you,” Finns said, his voice rough with thinly veiled emotion, “but Leo, you're important to us too. So, we’re here for you Nutty, for anything.”

Leo huffed a wet laugh through his still streaming tears, “I’m never getting rid of that nickname am I?”

Finn grinned tenderly at him, “not a chance in hell.”

Read on AO3

[slashscowboyboots]

The Blackboard Jungle: Amarillo by Morning (Part 2)

Part 1

I think I can get all of this out by Christmas (if my Internet doesn’t take a shit like it has the last two days).  Thank you for your great feedback

Tag list @izzysdenimjacket​ @no-stone-no-bone​ @sexcoffeeandrockandroll @awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands ​ @smokeandmirrorz ​ @sodalitefully ​ @roger-taylors-car ​ @harley-m-rose ​ @whisperess33 ​ @shawolat​ ​ @80snikki @rumoured-whispers

Warnings: asshole alert, more stuff coming out of the kids, fanfic smut.  All credit to the songwriters and I hope Ian Ziering is having a good time wherever he is

“Is tonight the night?” you wondered, glancing at your hair and smoothing your dress in the mirror.  You were getting ready to go out on a date tonight, possibly with your soulmate.  Someone named Ian Ziering.

No, not the actor.  He was actually a friend of yours, since you’d contacted him on Facebook, dming him a photo of your arm and asking if he had a tattoo of your name.  He sent back a picture of “Hortensia” boldly inked between his shoulder blades and the two of you commiserated for hours.

Eventually, though, love struck.  Ian invited you to be his guest at his latest “Sharknado” premiere, and you ended up seated next to a stunningly pretty actress carrying a flask in her purse, and as the two of you imbibed, she spilled the tea on everyone in Hollywood, delicious and hot and fresh.  

More than a little drunk, you asked her what her soulmate mark was, and she pulled her dress up her thigh to reveal the initials “I. A. Z.,” which made you collapse into stupefied giggles.

“Heeeeyyyy, Sia,” you slurred, snickering loud enough people turned around and stared, “heeeeyy, you gotta meet my friend.”

Ian had Facetimed you, saying that someone had reached out to him saying that he had the same name as him, although he wasn’t a member of Ian’s family.  When he realized this Ian only lived an hour from you, he immediately got in touch.

“Maybe he’s the one,” he said, hope visible in his icy blue eyes.  “Do you want me to set you up with him?”

“Sure,” you replied.  It was completely pointless to carry a torch for Jeff Isbell, his initials didn’t match up with your marking, although he was completely under your skin.  He’d bought you two cases of paste, as well as a sour cherry scone from the bakery across from the school, and because his room was next to yours, you frequently consolidated your classes, often with eye-opening results.

“Miss Teacher,” one of his students said, and you bent down to her.  “I gotta birfmark.”  She removed her shoe, then yanked her sock off and held out her right foot, proudly displaying the TAD decorating the top of it.

“Oh, you said, squatting next to her, “T. A. D.”

She drew her head back, her tiny face creasing in disgust at your horrifying ignorance.  “No, that’s Tad, Miss Teacher.  I can read, you know.”

You were immediately apologetic.  “Oh, yes, of course, um-?”

“Mari,” Jeff gently provided.

“Did you call me?” one of your pupils asked, and you looked into Tad Wilson’s huge brown eyes.

“Uh, no, honey, I didn’t,” and before you could say anything else, Mari lunged her still naked foot at him.

“I got your name on my foot,” she said.  “It’s a birfmark.  You got one?”

Tad blinked at her, then yanked up his shirt.  Over his heart was a small but intricate swallowtail butterfly.

Jeff gasped.  “It-no, it can’t be.  That’s unbelievable.”

You looked at him, his face visibly paler and his eyes enormous.  “What’s unbelievable?”

“Her name-her name is Mariposa.”

“You’re kidding.”

“No, I’m not.”

“That’s me,” Mari giggled, touching the butterfly and making Tad blush.  “Can I hug you?”

He pulled his shirt down and held out his arms.  “Sure.”  They pulled each other into a sweet embrace, and Jeff sat down at his desk and rubbed his hands against his face.

“That would’ve made my life easier,” he muttered.

You watched the two kids giggle and twirl each other around, your heart aching at how adorable and lucky they were, and asked, “You haven’t met your soulmate yet, Mr. Isbell?”

“No, and I probably never will.”

“Why?” you asked, curious.

He looked up at you, and his eyes were so tired, you could have cried for him.  “It’s not a picture, or initials, or even a name.  At least I don’t think it’s a name.”  He dug a palm into his left eye, then sighed.  “Uh, have you found yours?”

“No,” you said quietly.  

“What did you end up with?”

“Uh, initials.   They aren’t common.”  You looked away, feeling a lump aching in your throat.  “I-I have a date tonight, though.”

Jeff jerked his head up, then set his mouth in a thin line.  “Hey, that’s great.  Good luck.”

He’s not who I want, though, you thought, and before you could say that out loud, Tad threw Mari on the ground and ran to you.

“OW!” she howled, holding her head.  “Mr. Isbell, he hurt me!”

“Miss Teacher,” Tad gasped, holding his rear, “I need to poop!”

“Go, go!” you said, escorting him to the toilet in the back of the room.  When he shut the door, you gave the thumbs up to Jeff, who nodded, his eyes still heartbreakingly sad.

You’d agreed to meet Ian at an upscale restaurant halfway between your locations, and when you arrived at Sur La Table, he was nowhere to be found.  

“Reservation for Ziering,” you said to the hostess, and she guided you back to a private table.

After you were seated, you checked your phone to see if he’d sent you any texts saying he’d be late.  He hadn’t.

He was attractive, not as Jeff but not bad, you thought, scrolling through your very limited correspondences and sighing as you thought, Maybe this is what’s meant to be.  You took another drink of water, and another, and after three glasses of it you were ready to leave when he flopped down in front of you.

“Hey, babe,” he said, throwing you a wink and aiming finger guns at you.

“Um, hello, Ian,” you said politely, noticing a lack of apology for his lateness.  “Did you get held up at work?”

He took a long drink of water, then snapped his fingers at your server.  “I need a beer, toots, like now,” he said to her.  “Chop chop.”  He rolled his eyes. “Stupid college kids.  No, I found this new filter on Snapchat and I was really feeling it, y’know.  Sent it to a couple of my honeys.”

“Did you now?” you asked, ice creeping into your voice.

He threw his arm over the back of his chair.  “Yeah, I mean, my hair looked good today, so why waste it?”

On what? you thought irritably, as your server sat his beer down.

Ian grabbed her arm.  “I’d like the filet, well done.  You got ketchup here?” he asked, and you bit back a wince at what he planned on doing to such a nice cut of steak.  He handed the menu back to her, then snatched yours out of your hands.  “She’ll have salad, no croutons, no dressing.”

“I beg your pardon?” you snapped.

“Can”t have you porking up if you’re my soulmate. I need you to eat quick, too, hun, I gotta ‘Stop the Steal’ meeting starting in 20 minutes.  My man Trump was robbed.”

You stood up so fast, your chair nearly tipped over behind you.  “I think I’m done here,” you announced, throwing an arm in your jacket.

“Un uh, I ain’t getting stuck with the bill!” he hissed, standing up as well.  “You make all the money, you’re supposed to pay for this.”

Although it pained you to remain in his presence, you had to ask, “Ian, just what exactly was your soulmate tattoo?”  

Heart pounding and terrified you’d find your own initials, you watched him pull his shirt sleeve up and reveal a cat on his inner forearm.  “It’s pussy,” he smirked.  “I get all the snatch I want.” 

“Good luck with that,” you said, already heading towards the door.  Before you left, you stopped your server and handed her two 20 dollar bills.  “Please cancel our order.  And I’m sorry he was such a prick.”

“No shit?” Ian asked, his mouth hanging open as he held his phone.

“What an asshole,” Sia said.  “Did you hit him in the balls?”

“Now, love,” Ian said, shaking his head, “violence is never the answer.”

She shrugged, flicking her dark hair back.  “I guess you’re right.  So did you key his car?”

“No, Sia,” you sighed.  “I think I’m going to take a hot bath and try to forget today.”

“That sounds good Sis,” she replied.  “I think I’m going to flood his email with VD and ED ads.  Goodnight, honey.”

“I love this woman,” Ian said, grinning as he pecked her on the cheek.  “Goodnight, Y/N.”

“Mmm, Blaze, that was incredible.”

“You were like a tornado.  I’ve never been with a woman who had so much passion.  You nearly made me pass out.”  Blaze’s eyes crinkled at the corners.  “That was like angry sex.  Are you mad at me?”

You chuckled.  “No, my handsome cowboy.  I’ll never be mad at you. I-” you wanted to tell Blaze you loved him, that you hadn’t thought about anyone but him since you first laid eyes on him at the faculty meeting rodeo.  

But Blaze was heading to Amarillo in the morning, up from your San Antone home.  He’d only be wearing everything he owned, and your heart ached to watch him leave.  It was heartbreaking that love wasn’t enough to keep the two of you together, that an unseen hand controlling the universe opted to keep the two of you apart.

He turned over, his large hand caressing your face, his greenish eyes questioning. “I what, baby?”

You threw the covers off of you and trotted over to your gun safe.  “I want to target practice.”

After lining up a row of cantaloupes and pumpkins, you neatly dispatched them one by one, thinking about jerks, feeling the bullets leaving the chamber with a scream and watching the fruit blow apart with a happy thrill.

“Well, that was terrifying,” Blaze drawled in his midwestern twang.

You opened the pistol, barrel still smoking, and said, “Little sister don’t miss when she aims her gun.”

[rmtndew]

All I’ve Ever Known ~ Chapter 4

Summary: Fiona’s life is a shattered fraction of what it used to be. She’s trying to navigate her new normal when she meets Detective Marshall, who gives her something more to look forward to.

Pairing: Marshall and OFC.

Rating: PG

Warnings: Mentions of death, cancer.

A/N - This was intended as a short drabble but it got out of hand and became a multi-chapter story instead. It’s my first Marshall fic and the first fan fic that I’ve written in over a decade. The title comes from the song ‘All I’ve Ever Known’ from Hadestown: ‘I was alone so long, I didn’t even know that I was lonely. Out in the cold so long, I didn’t even know that I was cold. Turned my collar to the wind, this is how it’s always been. All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own, but now I want to hold you, too.’

Tag list - @hollydaisy23​​, @readings-of-a-cavill-lover​​, @onlyhenrys​​, @omgkatinka​​, @speakerforthedead0-blog​​, @gearhead66​​,  @thethirstyarchive​, @oddsnendsfanfics​, @littlerinoa, @agniavateira​, @aaescritora​,

If you’d like to be added to the tag list, let me know!

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5

I woke the next morning ten minutes before my alarm went off. At first I couldn’t figure out why and tried burrowing back into my warm bed to get my last few minutes of sleep back, but then my phone alerted me to a new text and I realized that’s what had woken me up. I sighed. I knew it was Darcy. Sometimes she woke up early with big ideas for her store and texted them to me, asking my opinion. She met me when I was working in interior design and any time she entertained the idea of having a dine in section, she’d send me pictures of what she wanted and ask how feasible it would be. Most of the time they were way too grand to fit into her pre-existing building. Other times she’d talk about a small coffee shop to encourage more people to come in and pick up their own orders and cut back on our deliveries. But I couldn’t see how renovating a portion of the store, buying new equipment and hiring extra employees to run a coffee shop would lower costs just by maybe cutting back on some deliveries. 

I was planning on ignoring the text until after I’d actually gotten up, but when another came through I knew it was best to just go ahead and nip it in the bud before she sent me an entire magazine’s worth of photos. But when I hit the home button on my phone I saw that the texts hadn’t come from Darcy. I had to squint against the brightness of the screen to make sure I saw the name right. Marshall.

I sat up and turned on my lamp, then looked at my phone again, reading the texts from their previews. 

Hey, it’s Marshall. I had a great  time yesterday. Sorry I was falling asleep on you. Can I make it up  to you this weekend?

Sorry. You’re probably sleeping. It might take more than coffee to make it up to you now. Dinner?

I suddenly felt wide awake and was no longer irritated by my few minutes of missed sleep. I would have gladly given up several hours for those texts. I decided not to reply to them right then, though. I wanted to make sure I’d had enough coffee to formulate a comprehensible reply and not look like I was drunk texting him, which I had a history of. My conversations with Darcy at five in the morning were proof of that. 

I got up and went about my morning routine like usual, trying not to wake Mom. When I made my way downstairs, I poured a cup of coffee and sat at the table. I sipped it, thinking about what to say to Marshall. I wrote and rewrote the text half a dozen times before finally having something I felt okay with, then I sent it.

Hey Marshall. I had a great time, too. You don’t have to make up for anything but I’d still like to have dinner with you. What day did you have in mind?

My heart was thudding from nerves and excitement. I was so focused on trying to calm myself down that I almost didn’t hear Mom when she walked in.

“Morning, sweetie,” she said, grabbing a coffee cup.

“Good morning,” I replied, then jumped slightly as my phone vibrated on the table. I tried not to look too enthusiastic as I grabbed it. 

Does Saturday work for you?

“Darcy again?” Mom asked, pouring coffee for herself. 

“Um...no, actually.” I tried biting back a smile but it didn’t work. “It’s Marshall.”

Her eyes went wide and she smiled back. “He’s writing to you at six in the morning?”

“He actually wrote me earlier. He asked if I wanted to have dinner with him Saturday.”

She sat down at the table beside me. “What did you tell him?”

“I haven’t replied yet. I don’t want him to think I’m just waiting by the phone for him.”

She looked at the phone in my hand. “Isn’t that exactly what you’re doing, though?”

“Yes, but he doesn’t have to know it.”

She laughed then blew on her coffee. “I’m glad this whole texting business wasn’t around when I was dating your father.”

“Even if it was, you’re a lot more forward than I am. You wouldn’t have had a single issue with texting Dad first, or answering him right away,” I said. My phone made another sound, reminding me of my unread text and I finally opened it, then replied. 

Saturday is perfect. What time  would you like to meet? 

“Well, there was only room enough for one coy person in our relationship and Rodger called that role,” Mom said after I put my phone down. 

I laughed. “I don’t think ‘coy’ was the right word for Dad. I think socially awkward was more appropriate.”

“He was too smart to be a social butterfly, too. He had to have a couple of flaws.”

“He couldn’t set the timer for the coffee pot, no matter how many times I showed him, and he thought that the Sharknado movies were amazing. He had his flaws,” I joked.

“This coffee pot is confusing.”

“He was an engineer!”

My phone buzzed in my hand and that time I didn’t wait to open the text. I read it right away. 

Would you let me pick you up  instead? Around six?

“Well, what does he say?” Mom asked.

“He wants to pick me up instead of me meeting him.”

“Are you going to let him?” 

I looked at her and she was smiling at me. I shook my head at her, laughing again. “You want him to come here so that you can see him, don’t you?”

She shrugged. “You keep talking about how handsome he is.”

“He is handsome. And it’s an awfully gentlemanly thing to do…” I bit my lip for a moment, pretending to think it over.

“Just tell him yes. We both know you’re going to.”

I gave another laugh. “Fine.”

I would like that, thank you. And  I’m curious, what does Detective  Marshall eat when he’s not eating a  cuban sandwich and plain chips?

I put my phone on the table. “What are your plans for today?” I asked, then took a sip of my coffee. 

She gave me a cheeky grin. “Changing the subject.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not changing the subject. I’m asking what my mother is going to be doing while I’m out earning the bread for this family,” I joked.

She snorted. “You don’t earn the bread, Fi, you just bake it.” She nodded at my arm. “And burn yourself in the process.”

“That’s the first time I’ve burnt myself in a year and a half. I’d say that’s a pretty good record.”

“That’s true,” she said. “And if you must know, I was thinking of going down to Valley and talking to Georgia about starting music lessons again after the new year. I think by then I’ll have recovered enough to be able to teach at least a few days a week.”

“You’re going to put yourself around snot nosed kids in the dead of flu season?” I asked dryly.

“I’ll be teaching teenagers, not little kids, and I’ll wear a mask,” she said. “I’ll make sure to clean everything between students and have them use hand sanitizer when they come in. I’m not going to be immunocompromised forever, and I’m not going to live in a bubble until then, either.” She gave me a smirk. “Besides, I can’t let you be the only one that earns the bread around here.”

I laughed at her but it was cut short when my phone buzzed again. 

Stuff that’s probably not very  good for him. Like Italian.  How does that sound?

Just when I thought I couldn’t be any more attracted to him, he confessed to liking my favorite type of food. I couldn’t stop my train of thought that went to me one day making an Italian dinner for him as a date. But my mind’s eye set up the imaginary dinner in my old apartment and I knew that would never happen. I let that thought go and took a deep breath, trying to focus my attention on the present moment.

That sounds great. I love  Italian food.

I sent it and sat back in my seat. I tried not to let my mind wander too far down the road with Marshall. I’d been on a lot of first dates in my life with guys that I’d thought were great who turned out to be jerks and I knew what that disappointment felt like. And even though I couldn’t imagine Marshall disappointing me in the same way they had - he’d proven at our coffee date that he was far more respectful, even while he was tired - I wanted to remind myself that I needed to take things one step at a time. 

Perfect. I’ll see you  Saturday at six, then.

I must have looked pretty gooey eyed over the whole thing because Mom reached out and touched my wrist gently. When I looked at her, the teasing tone was gone from her face and she was smiling at me. “I’m happy for you, sweetie. I really am.” 

I was a ball of nerves all Saturday morning and afternoon. More than I’d ever been on the day of a first date. But nothing with Marshall fell into my ‘usual’ category. There was something about him that made him different from any other man I’d gone out with. And maybe that was it: He was a man. Not some boy masquerading as one. He was quiet, and fierce, and protective. He thought before he spoke. And even when delivering a threat - like he had to that creep in the bar - he’d done it calmly and with authority. He exuded confidence, not cockiness, and there was honestly nothing more attractive than that. 

I was nearly ready, just zipping up my boots, when I heard a crash downstairs. I rushed down and found Mom in the kitchen, trying to pick up the broken pieces of one of her giant coffee mugs.

“I’m - I’m not sure what happened,” she said. “I just lost my grip.”

“It’s okay.” I took a step towards her, trying to avoid the pile of porcelain. “Let me clean it up.” 

“I can do it,” she said, sounding flustered.

“I know you can but you’re in socks and I’m wearing boots.”

She stood her ground for a moment, then finally sighed and relented, taking a step back. “Okay. I’ll get you the broom.”

“It’s fine. I’ll get it. Just watch your step.”

I went to grab the broom as she threw away the large chunks of her broken cup that she’d been able to pick up with her hands. I could tell she was frustrated. 

“You know, if you didn’t like that mug, you could have just gotten rid of it, you didn’t have to break it,” I joked, taking the broom and dustpan from the broom closet. “Or were you afraid I wouldn’t take the hint and buy you another one if I thought it just went missing?” 

She gave a small laugh but I could tell she was still embarrassed. “I actually liked that coffee mug a lot.”

“I’ll get you a new one.”

“You don’t have to do that. I can -” 

The doorbell rang and she stopped mid-sentence. We both froze, my eyes flicking to the clock on the stove. It was 5:53. Marshall was early. After a moment, Mom took a step towards me, holding out her hand to take the broom from me. I shook my head.

“You’re wearing socks,” I reminded her. “I don’t want you to cut your foot.”

Her eyes grew wide. “So you’re going to clean up after me while I go meet your date?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

She brushed her hand over her barely there hair, trying to collect herself, then let out a breath. “Okay, I’ll go let him in.”

“Don’t be too charming. He might have a thing for cougars and I don’t want to have to fight my mom for a guy.”

She smiled for real, the embarrassment of having her daughter clean up after her letting go enough that it was no longer plainly visible. “No promises,” she joked, then left the kitchen to answer the door. 

It didn’t take long to clean up. Even though the cup had shattered pretty good, its bright white color stood out against the dark wood of the floor, making even the tiniest pieces easy to see. After making sure I’d cleaned it all up, I threw away the pieces and put up the broom and dustpan, then went to find Mom and Marshall. 

They were standing in the entryway. Mom was saying something about teaching at Valley and Marshall stood in front of her, his hands clasped behind his back, and a look of sincere focus on his face as she spoke. Mom was a small woman but next to him, she looked comically tiny. 

I paused for a moment, taking him in. His hair looked a bit more controlled than any other time I’d seen him, his curls tighter and not quite as messy. His beard looked like it had been trimmed, giving it a purposeful look instead of the ‘I’m too busy to shave’ vibe that I’d gotten from him previously. He wore a thick blue sweater that made the color of his eyes pop when they drifted over to me. It was brief, maybe less than a second, before concentrating on Mom again. But he had a slight smile and it was enough for her to notice. She turned and looked at me. 

“There she is. I guess I’ll stop talking your ear off and let you two go,” she said. 

Marshall smiled at her, then at me, bigger that time. “I didn’t realize I was early. I apologize.” 

“No, don’t. You’re fine,” I said, moving to grab my coat. “I’m ready, I was just cleaning up a broken cup. I’m basically like Cinderella around here.” 

Mom snorted. “Hardly. Cinderella was made to do chores. You’re the one who won’t let me lift a finger,” she said. “Besides, I think she sang while she worked.”

I raised my eyebrow at her as I put my coat on. “Do you want me to sing?”

She shook her head. “No. No one wants that, sweetie,” she said, making Marshall laugh. She looked at him. “Fi spent a good portion of her teenage years screaming along to music in her room. I didn’t even know you could make ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ sound angry until she proved otherwise. Needless to say, her father and I encouraged her other interests a bit more enthusiastically.”

I grabbed my purse. “I should have let you clean up your own mess and answered the door myself,” I joked before kissing the top of her head. “Bye, Mom.”

Marshall smiled again. “It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Sparks.”

“Likewise, Detective Marshall. You two have fun.”

We left the house and after a few steps down the walkway, he jabbed his thumb back at the door. “She’s funny.”

“She can be,” I agreed. “She’s a spitfire, though, that’s for sure.”

“I like it.”

“Yeah, I like it, too.”

We walked to his truck and he opened the door for me. “You look gorgeous, by the way,” he said as I got in. 

I felt myself blush instantly, caught off guard by the compliment. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, closing the door for me. 

We’d only made it to the driveway and my stomach was already doing somersaults. He made me feel like a teenage girl, all giddy and excited, and I loved it.

He went around the front of the truck, then climbed in the driver’s side. I tried to sneak a look at him while he was putting on his seat belt but he caught me. He smiled as I snapped my head straight ahead. 

“Sorry, I just, I was…” I tried to think of an excuse but I couldn’t think of anything that didn’t sound lame. I let out a sigh. “I was checking you out,” I admitted. “I can’t lie. There’s no point. Sorry.”

“That’s the least offensive thing a woman has ever apologized to me for,” he said with a laugh, starting the truck. He leaned forward enough to catch my eye, making me instinctively turn my head towards him. He grinned. “Did you see anything you like?”

My blush deepened and I couldn’t hold back a giggle. “Maybe.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I mean, that is a nice sweater.” 

“Oh, so you were checking out my jumper?”

I shrugged. “It brings out your eyes.”

“Does it now?”

“It does. And you have very lovely eyes.”

“Thank you,” he said. “But my daughter bought the jumper, so I can’t take credit for it.”

“She did a good job,” I said, forcing my eyes to look up front as we pulled out of the driveway. Even though I’d already admitted to checking him out, there was a difference between looking and leering and I didn’t want to come off as creepy. “I take it that this wasn’t your weekend to have her?”

“It was supposed to be but she was invited to a Halloween party with some of her friends so she asked to do that instead. She’ll be with me tomorrow.”

“What did she dress as? For the party.”

“A cowgirl.” 

“Does she ride horses or did she just like the costume?” 

“No, she rides. She took lessons when she was a bit younger. And she and I go riding some weekends.” 

“So you’re Detective Marshall during the week and cowboy Marshall on the weekends? Does that ever cross over? Do they have mounted police in the homicide unit?”

He shook his head as he laughed. “No, not that I’m aware of.”

“That’s a shame.”

“Is it now?” he asked, and his tone made me blush all over again.

“I’m actually not going to answer that. I’m going to wait until we get a little further from my house to fully embarrass myself so that when you fake an emergency to get rid of me, my ego doesn’t get too crushed.”

“Do you really think I’d do that?”

“I hope not, but I’ve been excited about having dinner with you, so I’m going to try not to mess it up.”

“I think you’d have to try pretty hard to mess it up,” he said as we stopped at the end of my street. He glanced at me. “And I’ve been excited about it, too.”

[rpmemes-galore]

Deadpool 2 ... sentence starters

“You kind of killed him.”

“That's just lazy writing.”

“Why can't I fucking die?“

“Walk away! Just walk away!“

“Did he just call himself God?“

“I'm gonna rip you in half now.“

“You stole that from RoboCop!“

“I was born into war, bred into it.“

“You're a lot smarter than I look.“

“How do you know what I want?!“

“Welcome to the big leagues, kid.“

“I want to become a contract killer.”

“My body is an instrument of death.“

“Your souls are beyond redemption!“

“Family was always an F-word to me.“

“Come quietly or there will be trouble!“

“I'm gonna miss him. He seemed great.“

“Hey, look at me. You are not your father.“

“All right, well... this has been pretty scary.”

“What do you say we go fuck some shit up?“

“You're just a kid. You don't wanna hurt anyone.“

“I think you missed big, big chunks of that movie.“

“I loved her. I loved her like an ocean loves water.“

“’Let's Fuck Some Shit Up’ is my legal middle name.”

“Besides... I will never, ever let our child be named Todd.“

“You're so dark! You sure you're not from the DC universe?“

“I'm not gonna abandon this kid. He's never had anyone, ever.“

“I hate to interrupt, but is anybody nervous about the high winds?“

“People think they understand pain, but they have no concept of it.“

“I mean, it's not like I have a lot of strong role models to draw off of.”

“We don't have a lot of time. Your friend's about to make his first kill.“

“It's a goddamn fanny pack and you know it, you sick son of a bitch!“

“Remember when I kidnapped (name) and threatened him with great violence?“

“That piece of shit, he deserves to die for what he did to you. He hurt you badly.”

“But if you kill him, he wins. You become everything he says you are, but worse.”

“I realize that you're new to this, but relax. You've been chosen by a higher power.“

“No more senseless violence, no more bloodshed! We'll let karma take care of him.“

“I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible.“

“You might wanna start talking, 'cause I got a long history with firing at times like this!“

“I'm only yelling to impress the other guys. I'd never let anything happen to you, sugar-bear.“

“And I'd like the McRib to be available year round, but sometimes dreams don't come true!”

“Yeah, but what I mean is, like, the world ‘selfless’. I literally don't know what that means.”

“Sometimes it's so bad we feel like we're dying... but we can't really live until we die a little, can we?”

“The point is... there are people... There are people in this fucking world, besides him, who will treat you right.”

“You know, it has always been a dream of mine to see my face reflected in your helmet as you charge at me with murderous intent.”

“Oh, so you're from the future? I have three questions then. One: is dubstep still a thing? Two: what Sharknado are we on? And three: at what point do audiences say ‘Enough with the robotic arms’?”

[nxsmss]

movies I watched in March

I made some changes about how I will post these. first of all, I won't be adding the cast and plot because I'm too lazy, sorry. second, I added if I would watch the movie again, and lastly I'm gonna post my reviews every week because doing it monthly makes the list too long imo

wonder woman

finding ohana

the lost city of z

promising young woman

the last sharknado: it's about time

secret society of second born royals

sentinelle

captain america civil war

doctor strange

guardians of the galaxy vol. 2

deadpool

instant family

spiderman homecoming

deadpool 2

rock it

groupies bleiben nicht zum frühstück

yes day

the amazing spiderman

mulan (2020)

happy death day 2U

contagion

jumanji

thor ragnarok

guns akimbo

black panther

infinity war

1. wonder woman

okay, first of all it's an amazing movie there's no doubt in that but there are just two tiny things that are bugging me and maybe it's just because it's a DC movie and my dad basically punched it into me to be a marvel fan since I was 10. so, i did not like those shots were the characters were either falling because of a punch or jumping several hundred meters. it just looks weird and unnatural in my opinion. and the other thing... could they give her any less clothing?!?! I know it's very comic accurate but c'mon

7.5/10

would I watch it again? probably ya

2. finding ohana

this was such a cute fun little movie. i really enjoyed. it's kinda like 'journey to the center of earth' just made for today's generation and it made me feel a little nostalgic. I fuxking loved ioane's throwing up noises

8/10

would I watch it again? hm I'm gonna go with yes

3. the lost city of z

its a good movie, i can't deny that and I should definitely give it a higher rating but I thought it was like this exciting adventure movie, which it wasn't, it is based on real events and I didn't know that starting this movie. what didnt help, was that I was really tired when I watched it. I fell asleep for a bit and even my dad fell asleep, which kinda says a lot cause he never falls asleep during a movie (only if it's really late, which it wasn't. we finished it before 11)

I have to admit I think my rating would be a lot higher if I went into this movie with a different mindset!! I feel sorry only giving it 4 stars :(

4/10

would I watch it again? yes when I'm in the right mood

4. promising young woman

oh I liked this, I really did and I can recommend watching this. I did like the end, not cassie's end tho, but u like that they all kind got what they deserve. (little spoiler I was really rooting for ryan and him turning out to be an ass kinda crushed me a little)

8/10

would I watch it again? hm not sure

5. the last sharknado: it's about time

my friends hate me for watching all of these movies and tbh I hate myself too for doing so🤦🏻‍♀️ they are all so terrible!! and I have no idea if they do that on purpose or not, I really hope so. it's just so fucking bad that it's funny again. the plot is just stupid and we do not talk about the special effects. I cant really give a serious rating to this movie because it would have to be like a 0. but I feel like I cant rate it like that because I still fuckifn enjoyed watching it haha

I fucking lost it when fin pulled the sword out of the stone and it was a chainsaw

would I watch it again? yes and I hate myself for this answer

6. secret society of second born royals

fun little family movie, makes me wish I was a second born haha. it's good, there was a very very unexpected twist in this movie that neither me or my family saw coming. I just think it wasn't exactly my type

4/10

would I watch it again? nah

7. sentinelle

yea um.. it's a no from me. it was kinda really boring and it felt like there wasn't happening anything. it was supposed to be an action movie but there was hardly any action in it

2/10

would I watch it again? no

8. captain america civil war

another one of my favorite marvel movies

10/10

would I watch it again? yes

9. doctor strange

dont know what to say hahaha but if i could be a character in the mcu i would very much like it if i was a sorceress

9/10

would I watch it again? yes

10. guardians of the galaxy vol. 2

I think this is in general one of the least favourite movies in the fandom but I like it a lot. think i actually like it more that the first one and I love that we saw more of yondu in this, I really like his "powers" and the end was really sad.

8.5/10

would I watch it again? yes

11. deadpool + 14. deadpool 2

love love love the deadpool movies!!! can only recommend them. I like the second a bit more tho. what I was disappointed in, before it was released they made such a big deal about the rating saying "oh its gonna be so brutal and blah blah blah" and then, both of the movies are rated age 16+. I remember, for the first one I was so excited and then i watched it and i was like "well.. that wasn't exactly how I thought it was gonna be but okay

8/10

8.5/10

would I watch it again? yup

12. instant family

this is one of my absolute favorite movies ever. god I love it so much and the end always makes me cry (not in a sad way)

10/10 definitely

would I watch it again? YES

13. spiderman homecoming

I dont know what it is with me and this movie but I just dont really like it. I cant explain it. I'm also not the biggest mcu spiderman fan (sorry, please dont hate on me)

5/10

would I watch it again? yes if I'm doing a mcu rewatch but I don't think I would ever pick homecoming to watch when I'm bored

15. rock it

this has to be one of my favourite childhood movies (I dont even knowing I can say childhood, I was like 10 when it came out haha) I feel so sorry for all you non german speakers that cant enjoy this movie as much as i/we do. god I love it so much😂 and why the fuck isn't the soundtrack on spotify, I hate it

if you're german and you didn't watch this movie as a child I am very sorry for you.

I can already see myself watching "groupies bleiben nicht zum frühstück" sometime soon🤦🏻‍♀️

10/10 (god I had to) actually no 9/10 because of the ending. I'd liked it more if they would have kicked her out of the school and they got the band back together

would I watch it again? duh

16. groupies bleiben nicht zum frühstück

yup, I watched it. and I dont like it that I did because my aggression level was already high when I started and this movie did not help with it. the main actress is just no. I'm not sure if it's her or the character but I absolutely do not like her performance in this. argh it makes me want to break something. the songs slap tho!!

this movie is just straight up 1D fanfiction from 2013

4/10 but the songs are definitely 10/10 (they definitely got inspired by green day)

would I watch it again? ugh I hope not.

17. yes day

oh I loved this movie!! fun little family movie. it only has 5.7 stars on IMDb which i totally dont get, should be higher imo. loved seeing edgar ramirez in something other than an action/thriller kinda movie.

9/10

would I watch it again? yes but I don't think anytime soon

18. the amazing spiderman

aahh the feelings I got watching this movie. like I was 12 again... I love it and this movie. andrew garfield is my favorite spiderman and no one can change my mind.

9/10

would I watch it again? yup

19. mulan (2020)

I liked it. I don't know/remember the original disney movie so maybe that's why I like it. to me it feels like they got inspired by the original movie and made a version for (young) adults. it definitely didn't feel like a kids movie

5/10

would I watch it again? I think so yea

20. happy death day 2u

naahh I didnt like this one. the first one was good (I think, I dont remember) but this one was really boring. if it wasn't for my dad I would've stopped the movie half way through

1/10

would I watch it again? no.

21. contagion

it's a very good and interesting movie but tbh i was a bit bored towards the end but maybe that was just because of my mood

6/10

would I watch it again? hm, yea probably

22. jumanji

I'm not really a fan of Dwayne Johnson but I like/tolerate him in this haha. it's a fun adventure movie, I really like it, can recommend. when I watched it in theaters I didn't know nick jonas was in it and when he showed up my sister and I completely lost it

8.5/10

would I watch it again? yes

23. thor ragnarok

another one of my favorite marvel movie. I think definitely top 5. cinematography, soundtrack, jeff goldblum, everything is just 😚👌🏼 I just realised I really miss heimdall. such an underrated character and I wish he didn't die in infinity war

god the memories I get watching this movie. I think since ultron, my family and i have been to the premiere/the first screening, whatever, of every marvel movie and for some reason this was monday midnight, no idea why... but we went anyways. my mom drank 2 liters of cola, we were home again at like 3am and everyone had to get up by like 7 the next day because of school and work.

10/10

would I watch it again? hell yes haha

24. guns akimbo

wow. I gotta say I went into this with very low expectations but I was pleasantly surprised. nice fun action movie but it also made you think about some serious issues afterwards. I loved the camera work on most of the action scenes.

7.5/10

would I watch it again? yea maybe

25. black panther

it's a fucking masterpiece!!

10/10

would I watch it again? stupid question

26. infinity war

painful

10/10

would I watch it again? another stupid question

[turnabout-trial]

Sharknado

<Athena> サメの形をした大砲がありますよ！ 強そうですねー。撃ってみたいなあ。 Hey, there's a cannon in the shape of a shark! I'd love to try firing that thing! Boom!

<Phoenix> ん？ この砲弾‥‥イクラじゃないか？ Are these cannonballs supposed to look like fish eggs or something...?

<Athena> むむ。なんでサメなのに イクラなんでしょう？ Hm? But why fish eggs? Why not baby sharks?

<Athena> もしかして、シャケの親子を 襲って手に入れたとか！ Think about how crazy it would be to have sharks go flying through the air!

<Athena> サメとシャケの真剣勝負！ 勝者はすべてを奪い取る！ Watch the thrilling life-or-death struggle as the little tykes fight to stay alive out of water!

<Athena> ‥‥すごい勝負だったんでしょうね。 見てみたいなあ。 I can see it now! The drama! The mayhem! The whirlwind of teeth!

<Phoenix> （小道具ひとつでそこまで想像する 　キミの方がスゴイよ） (A tornado of sharks? Not even Hollywood could conjure up something that insane.)

If I understand the original correctly, Athena is actually suggesting that the sharks got the “salmon roe” for the cannon by stealing them from salmon parents. So, in the Japanese, the “life-or-death struggle” is a war between the sharks and the salmon. The last line is Phoenix thinking something like “Wow, you got all that just by looking at this one prop?” 

The WW versions of Dual Destinies were released in October 2013, only a few months after the first Sharknado came out, and the NA version of this DLC episode came out in November. Does that give the localization team enough time to know about the movie? Dunno—no idea when they started promoting the movie. So the localization team is either prophetic, really really fast, or they went back and edited this joke in immediately upon learning of Sharknado. Take your pick.

[writethehousedown]

In My Head, We Belong (Gigi/Crystal) Chapter One - Zyan

Summary: Gigi tries to keep her feelings for Crystal as a secret, while juggling orders, her side job as a seamstress, helping her very clueless friend Jan ask an equally clueless Jaida out on a proper date and begging Silky, Heidi and Dusty to please stop their Who Can Cook Faster competition.

a/n: new fic who dis. I’m back back back again! The new season really has sparked my creative juices :) This began as a small request I did on my blog and it turned out into a very fluffy universe. I hope you like it! Much like Genie AU, I’m having a lot of fun writing this. 💖 Frey is the bestest beta, and y'all can find me over at @chachkisalpaca. The title comes from the Doja Cat’s song “Streets.”

Widow’s restaurant might not be a five star one - or four even - but she keeps it neat and clean, the walls get painted whenever Widow spots the tiniest of cracks in the paint, and she’s got a handful of regular patrons. She’s also the best boss Gigi has ever had.

She makes sure they all eat a good meal before beginning with their shifts, pays them a little extra the nights they’re full and still manage to serve all customers as good as they can, understands when they can’t come to work for whatever the reason might be, and doesn’t need much explanations when they request a night off, because she trusts her girls. As far as the staff is aware, Widow is an angel disguised as a human.

They’re usually full on Saturdays, the kitchen turning into a war zone as Dusty, Heidi, and Silky try to get the waitresses orders ready, sometimes competing between each other who’ll gets their order ready the fastest. For a moment it’s amusing to the waitresses, until they get carried away and have to be reminded that it’s not time for their foolishness, it’s time for dinner.

This Saturday though, it’s almost empty - a couple with their kids being the only clients they’ve gotten so far, since a storm broke loose.

“Well, the weather man did say we’re gonna have a few days with rain,” Jan comments, standing in the tip of her toes to watch the rain from the window of the back door.

“Yeah, but this is not Singing in The Rain type of rain, this is like, I dunno, Sharknado kinda weather,” Crystal replies, throwing a green nine to the table. Jaida huffs and reaches for a card in the pile before passing.

“Have you ever seen Sharknado?” Heidi asks; her brows are knitted in a confused frown as she throws a green +2. Silky bangs her fist on the table, proceeding to frantically search for a card to kill off Heidi’s.

“… No,” Crystal admits at the same time Silky slams a +4. “Fuck! I hate y’all,” she groans as she draws six cards from the pile. Heidi and Silky high five with smug smiles and giggle.

Gigi watches them, completely amused, leaning against the door frame. She’s not sure if they should be playing Uno during work hours, despite not being a single soul around, but Widow gives them more liberties than a boss normally does. Hell, sometimes she’s the one to come into the kitchen with a Uno deck, asking if anyone wanna play.

“I’d join, but I feel like Heidi and Silky have some sort of trickery going on,” Brianna says, mindlessly scrolling through Instagram, glancing up at them from time to time.

Gigi looks at the pair, noticing the looks they share from time to time and cocks a brow. She’s not even surprised; Heidi and Silky are a competitive duo, though Heidi shows it a lot less.

“Do you think one of them is sitting on a bunch of +2 cards?” Gigi asks, stifling a giggle. Brianna snorts, locking her phone.

“Most likely, it’s like the fourth time they made Crystal pick up since they started playing. Notice how suspicious it is that she hasn’t picked any +2 or +4 yet?” She comments just as Jaida slams a card on the table, yelling ‘Uno’.

Gigi snickers; though she prefers full nights because it’s a good moment for tips, she doesn’t mind when once in a while it’s completely deserted and they get to relax and have fun together.

Though that fun results in Crystal throwing her cards to the ground after a collective work between Jaida, Heidi, and Silky in which each of them throws a +4; she abandons the game saying she’ll never play again with them. She goes over to Brianna and Gigi with her arms folded and a childish pout.

“Please, tell me I’m not the only one that believes they’re cheating,” she says as she looks back at Silky and Heidi. They’re now battling against each other to see who the final loser is, and it’s honestly hilarious.

“I wouldn’t be surprised; I’m used to them cheating whenever we play anything. They’re competitive bitches,” Gigi replies, Crystal laughs softly and Gigi smiles to herself.

Sometimes the fact that she’s still there after two years surprises her; she’d never thought she’d actually like this job and her co-workers, considering them her second family.

She also has feelings for one of the members of said family, but she’ll never say that out loud.

Gigi’s so distracted by her thoughts, she doesn’t hear Jackie behind the door, almost falling on her back if it wasn’t for her.

“Wow! You okay, G?” She asks with a concerned voice. Gigi nods, and Jackie helps her stabilize herself. “Girls, please clean this up, believe it or not we’ve got clients. Silk, they ordered two menus of the day; can you take care of it?”

Silky stares at Jackie for solid five seconds before slowly starting to get up and all of a sudden there are several Uno cards spilled all across the floor. Well, guess Brianna was right.

“You cheating bitch! I knew you had something up in your sleeve,” Crystal exclaims, completely offended.

“Or your ass,” Jaida points out with a laugh, kneeling to pick up the cards. “You are one shady bitch, someone remind me to tell Widow to ban you from the Uno games.”

“Ban who from Uno?” Widow asks as she enters the kitchen. Jaida points at Silky, telling her about the cheating. Widow clicks her tongue. “Silky, I’ve told you already; if you’re gonna cheat, put those cards in your thighs, not ass!” Widow scolds, but soon she’s loudly laughing along with Silky.

Jackie pinches the bridge of her nose, counts until ten, and claps her hands, hurrying Silky to get her orders ready. Then, Widow remembers why she stepped into the kitchen in the first place.

“The storm is getting really bad; does everyone have a way to get home safely? I wouldn’t mind going out of my way to drop some of y’all off,” she offers, speaking loud enough so everyone in the kitchen can hear her.

“My grandpa lent me his car because he heard it’d rain today. I could also drop some of y’all home,” Dusty pipes up from the other side of the room.

“I came here with Jesus and an umbrella, so I’ll take any of you two on that,” Heidi says, looking back and forth between Dusty and Widow.

“Well, John is picking me up today, so I guess I’ll pass.” Crystal shrugs, and Gigi knits her brows in a frown.

“Who’s John?” Gigi asks before she can stop herself. Crystal looks at her with a toothy smile that may or may not make her heart sting a little.

“Oh, he’s a guy I met at a friend’s birthday party. We’ve been going out for like, two weeks or so. I thought everyone knew, I’ve pretty much annoyed everyone during Friday’s lunch shift talking about him,” she explains excitedly, and Gigi has to restrain herself from letting her devastation show on her face.

“I’m not on the lunch shifts, just the night ones,” she simply says, and the topic soon goes back to the previous one, Gigi remaining silent for most of the conversation, except to say she’d appreciate a ride home.

The rest of the night remains uneventful, since they’ve got no other clients. They close early, and they only leave when Crystal’s guy arrives, the redhead quickly says goodbye to all of them as she climbs inside his car with a big smile.

As she stares out the window, watching how the streets empty more and more, Gigi thinks she couldn’t be upset with Crystal for going out with people, since she isn’t planning on confessing her feelings to her.

It doesn’t mean it hurt any less, though.

[dickshardblog]

For Russia With Love: The Tara Reade Story?

There are three women I know of now whose name is pronounced Tar-uh Reed. Tara Reid is an actress who starred in the Sharknado franchise. Tara Reed is an artist and designer. She designed my favorite coffee mug.  And now I've learned that there is a Tara Reade, who used to work for Joe Biden.

When I heard about the allegation that Tara Reade made against Joe Biden, I was deeply disturbed. Were Biden's hands on shoulders, close-ear talking, hair petting, and hugs something more than just an overly-affectionate guy with boundary issues and a lack of understanding of personal space? It had always looked uncomfortable, but innocent, to me. And, if it's innocent, I find it strangely endearing, despite the fact that I don't personally like to be touched by strangers.

He's not just overly familiar with females. For every picture of Joe Biden petting a little girl's hair, there's another of him with his arms around a man, gazing into his eyes, or practically kissing his ear. I could do a Google image search and come up with some pretty compelling visual evidence that Joe Biden is in love with several men. He's not. At least, I don't believe so. Some people are huggers. And Joe Biden is a hugger extraordinaire.

I think the world no longer tolerates that, but I also think it is both innocent and changeable behavior. Unlike Trump, Biden does have some sense of self-awareness, can listen to criticism, and make changes.

I'll be honest:  I really don't want the allegations to be true. I do have that bias, and I will freely admit it. I always have that bias. No matter who it is. Like any regular person, I don't want sexual assault to happen. I would hope we all have that bias. I hope that none of us would wish a woman had been sexually assaulted so we could have some ammunition against a political opponent. But I know better. There are plenty of people who really hope Biden did exactly what Reade says he did. And we all know it does happen, of course.

Tara Reade's story, when I first heard it, sounded credible. In a public, yet deserted hallway, Biden pinned her to a wall, groped her, kissed on her, and asked if she wanted to go somewhere else. When she reacted negatively, he said, "Come on, Man, I heard you liked me." Shit. That sounds like Joe Biden, I can hear him saying that. So, it sounds bad. I agree that we should listen to women. We should take them seriously. We should look into their allegations and dig until we find the truth. I let other people do the investigative journalism. I found their articles, checked their sources and compiled a pretty decent collection of truths that form a pretty cohesive picture.

Here's the truth that I have found:

In 2009, Reade wrote an article commending Biden's work on the Violence Against Women act. The same year, she wrote another article claiming that she'd left DC because her husband had received a job offer to manage a Congressman's campaign in the Midwest, and she'd moved with him.

From late 2016 to early 2017, she had a Twitter account using her newly married name, Tara McCabe.  She used this platform to praise Biden on multiple occasions.  She retweeted him saying, "My old boss speaks truth. Listen." This Twitter account also featured a lot of anti-Russia, anti-Putin sentiment.

Then, in 2018, she writes in an Op Ed for Medium which praises Russia and Putin, that she left Washington because she "saw the reckless imperialism of America and the pain it caused through out the world," and because she loved Russia with all her heart. In this article she describes Putin as a "compassionate, caring, visionary leader."

She wrote several pro-Russia, pro-Putin articles during this time, gushing over him, saying, "President Putin has an alluring combination of strength with gentleness. His sensuous image projects his love for life, the embodiment of grace while facing adversity. It is evident that he loves his country, his people and his job … President Putin’s obvious reverence for women, children and animals, and his ability with sports is intoxicating to American women … And like most women across the world, I like President Putin… a lot, his shirt on or shirt off.”

Then in 2019, she's all in for Bernie Sanders. She wrote another article, with yet a different reason for leaving, this one with the harassment allegation attached. "Then, I went to Senate personnel for help. No one helped me. I resigned or I would say, I was forced to resign."  The report she says she filed doesn't seem to exist.

When she started attacking Biden publicly, she also resumed denouncing Putin. Putin was bad again. When the media dug up her old articles praising Putin, she deleted them. Too late, of course. They can no longer be found where they were originally published, but copies were made. She now claims they were part of a novel she was writing that was set in Russia. They were clearly op-eds, not notes for a novel. No novelist I know of publishes their novel notes as op-eds while they're working on the book.

There are a whole lot of other inconsistencies, people she says she told about the incident denying any knowledge, her brother pointedly changing his story, an old neighbor of hers coming forward to say she wouldn't trust a word Reade says, and countless other glowing red flags.  But this blog is already so very long, and I haven't even gotten to the meat of what I want to talk about yet. This has all just been background, the evidence I followed to form my theory of what is going on with this. And I want to get it down before I read it somewhere else.

I've got a theory! It could be Russia!

Okay, hear me out. Here's what I think might have happened:

Sometime in late 2017 or early 2018, Reade somehow becomes involved in communications with Russia, a political operative, maybe even someone in the government. Hell, perhaps even Putin himself, a highly unlikely prospect, of course. But not outside the realm of possibility. I wouldn't be surprised to hear that Putin maintains a stash of burner phones and carries on flirtatiously with American Women in his spare time. It's the stuff of spy novels, sure. Yeah, it's far-fetched, but allow me my fantastic imaginings. I am a fiction writer, after all.

But a Russian political operative of some kind becomes romantically involved long-distance with Reade. Of course it's not a real relationship, not on the Russian side. They are just using American citizens as sleeper agents they can prompt to stir up shit when it would cause the most damage.

Reade is manipulated to turn against Joe Biden and encouraged to back Bernie Sanders. Now, an aside at this point. I like Bernie. I would vote for Bernie, I'd love to see him as President. I don't believe that Bernie Sanders or his campaign are involved in any collusion with the Russian government in any way, and both he and his campaign openly discourage Russian meddling. None-the-less, there still exists evidence that Russia has interfered in ways favorable to Sanders and his campaign. Russia doesn't want Bernie Sanders as President, but some of Sanders more rabid supporters are very easily influenced by carefully placed fake news stories and are extremely useful at stirring up political infighting on the left. Alright, back to my theory.

At this time, she's also advised to stop praising Russia, so as not to raise any suspicion. And, finally, to drop that allegation bomb on Joe Biden right when it would do the most damage. Hopefully to allow Bernie Sanders to overtake Biden for the nomination, but, failing that, at least send Joe limping into the General.

Yes. In a nutshell, I think the Tara Reade allegation is simply more Russian meddling of the same sort that has been going on all along. I think, in some form or another, she is a Russian agent. Maybe there is no spy novel romance going on. Perhaps she's just being paid. But this whole thing stinks of Russia, and Russia's fingerprints are all over it.

But, hey, what do I know? I'm just a fiction author with a good imagination

[gwydionmisha]

Zombie Resurrection

I watch a lot of zombie movies.  Like most of them at least once.  One'll slip by here or there only to be noticed a few years later and I'll have to wait for some to come up somewhere I can watch free, but I watch them all, even the terrible z-grade ones.  I've been dreaming about zombies in one form another since I was literally three, before I knew the word.  IDK, they resonate with me for a bunch of reasons, some of which I've written about before.

I have watched aquatic NAZI zombies, stripper zombies, lederhosen zombies, crappy racist pre-Romero zombies.  I love Romero and always will.  I love Cemetery Man.  Train to Busan is now my favorite, but seriously Dawn of the dead in particular was formative in a bunch of ways.  I even watched the zombienado thing the sharknado people made.

I may have found one of the worst zombie movies ever made last night.  I mean, at least Zombienado and the zombie strippers had some camp value and the self awareness to know they aren't making a good flick here, just making a flick period, so they just had fun with it.  It was a terrible, terrible thing, that made very little sense, couldn't pick a tone, was consistently horribly racist despite being made in 2014 and randomly casually homophobic, and had possibly the stupidest, most annoying collection of characters ever assembled in a zombie movie.  Also it was simultaneously vehemently christian and anti-christian in a way that just kept confusing me.  It seemed to be trying to say something about religion, but the whole thing was so incoherent, I can't venture a guess as to what.

When I say stupid, I mean I literally could not figure out how this collection of people could survive an hour in a zombie apocalypse let alone a year and a half.  These zombies are attracted to noise, but they never shut up and like yelling and screaming all the fucking time.  All of their ideas are terrible and frequently deadly.  The teenager keeps wandering off by herself.  they keep putting limbs and faces next to infected people.  they don't pay attention to undead they can see coming towards them because their annoying petty personal dramas are more important than not getting bitten.  They keep splitting up and getting attacked.... Like seriously, how'd they make it this far?

The two supposedly bright characters really, really weren't.  One was a bunch of ableist tropes (both mental and physical) in a man suit.  The other?  Was supposedly a scientist, but was only marginally brighter than the others.  If this movie wasn't from the UK and six years old, I'd have thought he was a trump CDC political appointee.  Like get this: They did mass inoculations of the military with an experimental vaccine they had not bothered to test for safety and efficacy.  They had no tests to see if there were any side effects apparently before they lined them up and dosed them with the stuff.  What could go wrong?  Dude!

So I have to ask, how did someone with 45's level of mental impairment get put in charge of a biological warfare vaccine development program of this magnitude?  How did he get the credentials to get hired?  What muppet let him handle level four pathogens?  Did not one person anywhere in the process suggest at least one proper phase 3 study?

And his decisions stopped making any sense at all once they ran into literal Sweet zombie Jesus.  No really.  There is a literal zombie Jesus and what little sense the character had in their heads falls right out along with the already minimal coherence to the plot.

I just can't with this film.  I keep trying to work out what any of the characters were thinking or why they did any of the things they did and I can't.  I still have no idea why zombie Jesus' powers worked the weird inconsistent way they did, just as I can't explain WTF they had a live action first person shooter style intro tacked on at the start of the movie and what if any information it was meant to convey.  

They'd have been better off killing off these people as an intro and then made another better movie with characters that I actually wanted to watch doing things that made sense instead of bickering loudly to attract zombies and occasionally literally feeding themselves to zombies on purpose.

Do not watch Zombie Resurrection.

[collecting-stories]

Here with You - JJ Maybank

Request: hi!! you know how much i love your stories and i was just wondering if i could request a jj x reader one where the reader has a hard time hanging out in big crowds (aha like myself) but she always makes an effort to do it for her friends but one time jj asks her to go to a party but she can’t do it this time and instead he surprises her by showing up at her house and the  just like fluff with jj ahah!! 

A/N: Part of this is based on the sheer excitement I had when JJ mentioned CHUD because honest to god that movie is one of my faves lol. I watch all that shit. JJ and I would be best friends (he’s too far out of my league for us to be anything else😂😂😂)

Outer Banks Masterlist

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

JJ was unsurprisingly charismatic. He could talk anybody into a good time. An easy smile and the eternal laid-back beach vibes that he gave off could make anyone in the world feel at ease. Unlike John B, who always had to command attention, people seemed to flock to JJ without any need to persuade them. He didn’t have to be interesting or funny or smart he just had to be there and everyone was crowding around to talk to him. 

In stark contrast, you loathed a crowd. Parties were your deepest source of anxiety and the thought of having to hold more than one person’s attention at a time made you calm up. But you had figured out somewhere in freshman year that you were as unoriginal as everyone else on the island because you craved JJ’s attention as much as anyone else in or outside of his friend group. You endured crowds of people just to get two seconds alone with him on the weekend. Just so he could smile at you for a fraction of a moment while he listened to someone tell a funny story. 

That smile was enough for you to push yourself to the absolute limit of until the idea of spending time with anyone had you physically paralysed in anxiety. When JJ texted you about a party all you wanted to do was go and pretend to have fun and stand around next to him all night while he entertained groups of pogues and tourons that thought he was incredible. Instead you texted back that you weren’t up for a party, because you weren’t even up for getting out of bed, let alone partying. 

-next time- you promised. 

-k- he texted back. 

With that somewhat settled you resumed watching reruns of Chopped while you laid in bed with the covers almost completely obscuring you from view. You imagined everyone down at the boneyard, the mildest fear of missing out settling in as you thought about what a good time they were all probably having. But then you thought of the crowds of people you would have to navigate your way through and you were rolling over to face the wall and pulling the comforter over your head. 

You must of dozed off because when you woke up there was a weight on your bed. You thought maybe it was your dog but he usually spread out. Shifting around to lay on your back and pulling the covers away from your face. 

“What...JJ?” You questioned, still a little groggy from sleep. 

There he was, sitting cross-legged on the side of your bed watching Chopped. He’d pulled the desk chair over and there was a bag from Dunkin’ along with two iced coffees and a box of munchkins. 

“Rise and shine, sleepyhead.” He Held his phone up so you could see the screen and you realized he was on your amazon account, “I added zoombies to our watchlist, plus zoombies two and the classic birdemic. Figured we could have a movie night, didn’t think you’d be sleeping on me.” 

You sat up in bed, instinctively reaching for a coffee, “what about the party?”

“Skipped it.” He replied, seemingly unbothered by the idea of missing a night at the boneyard. You couldn’t help feeling a little guilty when he said it, you hadn’t cancelled on him just so he would feel obligated to come over and spend time with you, you didn’t want to be the type of person who guilted people into choosing between them and their friends.  

“But you love parties.”  

JJ had been a fixture at parties since he was old enough to pass at them. He went to his first in 8th grade without getting thrown off the beach and he claimed it was the best time he ever had. Since then you didn’t know if he had missed an opportunity to party.  

“So? I love hanging out with you too. Besides, this is more fun.” He shrugged. He clicked off chopped, scrolling through the apps on your tv to find amazon and turn it on. “What do you wanna watch first?” 

“Zoombies.” You pulled the chair closer so you could reach the bag of hash browns and breakfast sandwiches, passing one to JJ as you did. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be with everyone else at the party?”

“Why?” He asked, faking suspicion as he leaned in close to you, “are you trying to get rid of me?”

“No, I just don’t want you to pass up something that makes you happy just to sit here with me and watch movies.”  

JJ’s ADHD made it almost impossible for him to sit through an entire movie. You couldn’t take him to the movie theatre, he was up in the first five minutes. And any movie that required actual attention was lost on him but dumb shit like sharknado and CHUD were perfect because he didn’t have to just sit still and watch. You made fun of the movie and goofed off with each other while you watched.  

“I’m just as happy being here, hanging out with you.” He knew that going to parties wasn’t the only thing you did just to make him happy and he couldn’t help wanting to do something for you, even if it was as small as sitting around all night. “We don’t have to go to every party if you don’t want to,” JJ mentioned and it didn’t pass your attention that he said ‘we’ as if you were a unit that always did everything together. 

“I know but you like going to the boneyard.” 

“Sure, but you don’t.” 

“Yeah but you shouldn’t miss out just cause I’m staying home.” You reasoned. You didn’t want him to feel like you were keeping him away from anything important. 

“I’m not missing out.” JJ insisted. “If I went, and you were here, then I’d be missing out. I’d much rather hang out with you than hang out with everyone else.”

“Okay.” You nodded. “Hey, who’s the other coffee for?” 

“You. I’m feeding your unholy caffeine addiction.” 

“It’s Not an addiction.”

“How many cups have you had today?” He asked, already knowing the answer. 

“Three?” 

JJ laughed wrapping his arm around your shoulder to pull you in for a hug and then kissing the side of your head. 

-

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[twentysomethinginorlando]

This was part of the article I posted on Tuesday, but I’m pulling it out here as it’s own thing.

Early into the quarantine, I ordered two childhood PC video games off Amazon: Barbie Pet Rescue and Barbie Riding Club. Trying to get games from 1995 and 1998 to run on our computers was no easy feat, thank goodness Jay still has his laptop running on Windows 7, and I had such a good time with them. Sadly, neither one has a ton of content and it didn’t take me long to finish them.

I’m really not a gamer person normally. I’ve played Zoo Tycoon for years, but that’s about it. Jay’s been trying to get me to play World of Warcraft for the better part of four years now. The one time he got me to try it, I made it to level seven, my character got turned into a frog, I had a panic attack, and I quit.

(I have a horrific fear of frogs, which is a story I will share at some point if I haven’t already, but not today.)

However, this led to me searching the internet for another horse game I could play, since I beat Barbie Riding Club in less than three hours.  

Yes, I was absolutely one of those horse girls everyone makes fun of when I was younger, and I still love horses. One of my greatest simple pleasures in life is a show on Netflix called Spirit Riding Free. I also got Jay hooked on it, and we introduced a bunch of our friends to it in a Netflix Watch Party. It’s all that ten-year-old Chelsea wanted in life.

Turns out it is still something twenty-eight-year-old Chelsea wants in life, and I found it in a game called Star Stable. 

So, you start it, and there’s some mystical stuff in the intro, but you don’t think about it too much. It’s just you and your horse, and it’s like Barbie Riding Club but ten times better. You start doing races and doing quests to help people and taking care of your horse. You can buy pets, and different gear, and more horses. Now you’re going on adventures and meeting new people, and unlocking new areas, and you think it’s just horses, riding, smiles, and happiness.

Then somebody opens the Hellmouth.

(Hellmouth is a term from Buffy the Vampire Slayer if you’re not familiar.)

Now, you’re helping this super-secret organization trying to stop the forces of darkness. Everyone else is playing Animal Crossing, and I’m trying to help a talking squirrel prevent the end of the world.

I have to admit, it’s a little frightening how much time I’ve logged on this game. I’ve had entire days where I’ve done nothing else. Once I maxed out my free trial, I bought a month’s subscription, and then about a week later their LIFETIME membership went on sale and I went ahead and bought that.

Chelsea! You just got married! You should be spending time with your husband!

He’s sitting right behind me on his computer playing WoW or Sea of Thieves, I promise you. He’s actually really mad my game has a lifetime option. He’s been paying for WoW monthly for almost fourteen years.  

My only regret is that I didn’t choose my character’s name more carefully because I had no idea how much I was going to love this. So, until they make it an option to change your name, I’m stuck as Phoenix Seastorm. (I like Phoenix, I just wish I’d picked something besides Seastorm.) Unlike World of Warcraft, you can’t just type what you want your name to be. You have to choose from preset options to keep it safe for kids.

This is also the reason I don’t talk to anyone on this game and I’ve ignored every friend request I’ve gotten. I’m sure there are as many adults as there are kids on this game, but I don’t want to take any chances. I got Jay to play the free trial and start us a riding club, just so I could join it in order to get people to stop sending me riding club invitations.

We’re the Sea Explorers Society, because it was the closest we could get to the S.E.A.: the Society of Explorers and Adventurers.

If you’re wondering, Jay’s name is Jayla Junglebook, because of course it is.  

The only real problem I’ve had is this game is not meant to be played for so many hours a day. I’ve blown through so many of the side-quests that I really only have the main quest now until I can unlock some more stuff.

I even bought the first novel off Amazon, and I blew through that in one sitting too. When I like something, I tend to go all in. Jay’s already aware that when we eventually go back to work, there will be days he’s going to have to log in for me to feed my horses because I won’t have time after my fourteen-hour shift.

I currently have three horses, a bunny, and a spider. I won the spider after rescuing a bunch of other spiders from a freaking Spidernado, like Sharknado, but with spiders.  

Now, I have to pause because spellcheck didn’t mark Sharknado as a misspelling…

This game has lots of pop culture references, and all sorts of interesting side quests and activities. In addition to all the horse stuff, you can do archaeology, you can go fishing, you help with construction, you help with gardening, and so much more.  

I honestly wish I had found this game sooner. Not only because of how much fun I’m having, but because from May 2017 to May 2019, you could adopt Spirit from Spirit Riding Free in the game. Guess what you can’t do now. I’m still pouting.

I’m desperately hoping they might bring him back when the Spirit Riding Free movie comes out next year.

Right now, all the new content they’re releasing in game is based on Western riding because they just released this new area called Starshine Ranch. Which is awesome for a lot of people, but I grew up riding Western so it’s less exciting for me. Oh well, that means there’s more exciting things to come around the corner!

I keep wanting to start a Star Stable blog separate from Twenty Something, but Jay keeps begging me not to. “You’re allowed to just have fun. You don’t need to turn it into work.”

[onewaywardwitch]

Just A Typo (6/?)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Hacker!Reader

Summary: It was a simple challenge between a very competitive group of friends. A challenge that ended very differently than anticipated.

Warnings: Language

Word Count: 2275

A/N: I’m so happy to finally get to post this part! I’ve been most excited for this one. Thanks for all the love on the previous parts, enjoy part 6!

If someone had told me a month ago that I'd be spending my days working as the security analyst for Stark Industries and my nights chatting with the Avengers, I'd have asked how much they had to drink. It's amazing how an illegal act can completely turn your life around, and not in the ‘sent to prison’ sense.

Fortunately for me, Wanda took me under her wing. She was determined to have another female presence around in a tower overflowing with testosterone and I wasn’t complaining. I appreciated her company just as much as she did.

Everyone was far more welcoming. Well, almost everyone. Natasha still seemed adamant on ignoring me. But with Sam constantly joking around with me, it was easier to forget about it. I had become a common visitor of the residents upstairs and I loved getting to know their actual personalities rather than the superhero personas the world had grown so used to seeing. Like how Tony won’t speak to anyone before his morning coffee. Or how Bruce has to be brought food throughout the day, or else he would simply forget to eat.

But Bucky remained an enigma that I couldn’t crack.

It wasn’t that we didn’t spend time together. We did. And many times, I enjoyed being near him more than some of the louder Avengers. We were never hanging out alone, though. He was a lot quieter when I was around, but I didn’t take it personally. He was obviously still a bit nervous being around anyone other than his teammates, but I liked to think that I was growing on him. At least he sat down and talked to me with everyone else now, instead of just running out of the room. And I adored having more than just two friends. The top floor had quickly become a second home to me.

~~~~~

I ran my hand through my hair for what felt like the seventh time in five minutes. For some reason, the system I was planning on installing for Stark Industries was not cooperating with me. I was forced to keep changing around the algorithm and every new sequence was rejected, not working in the slightest. It didn’t help that I had already gone through a full pack of Haribo and had none left. Timothy, one of my co-workers with a strange love for the worst movies ever made, kept glancing at me every time I let out a frustrated groan. Whenever he looked over, he opened his mouth as if to ask me something, before closing it again. It didn’t take long for me to snap.

“If you’ve got something to say spit it out. You look like a fish doing that.” I should have felt bad for snapping at him. He was a nice enough person, and I had been informed by the secretary down the hall that he harboured a small crush for me. Unfortunately for him, I was prepared to pick a fight with anyone. He just happened to be on the receiving end of it.

“I, um, I was just wondering if you... if you needed a hand with whatever you're working on?” he asked me, nervously wringing his hands.

I stared blankly at him. My lack of response caused his expression to change from slightly hopeful yet nervous, to absolutely terrified.

Stop it, don’t be a bitch, he’s just being nice. You can do this, politely decline his offer. There's no need to make a scene.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

Well, that didn’t work.

“Am I not capable of doing it myself now, huh? I can do it perfectly fine. The system is stupid, that’s all. I don’t need your help because you'll end up pissing me off even more than you already have.”

Wow, ok, enough. Close your mouth. Bite your tongue. Walk away. Do anything other than talking to him.

“And also, you are literally the only person in the world who actually likes ‘Sharknado’.”

Why? Why would you say that? You absolute idiot.

I turned back to the computer that I was incredibly close to smashing as I ignored Tim’s deflated expression. He moved back to continue on with whatever he was working on himself. I typed in new lines of code on my screen, praying that these would work. While I waited for the outcome, I started to feel a bit guilty. I was stressed about my job that I was really desperate not to lose and I was taking it out on whoever was closest to me, which just so happened to be Tim.

“Oh shit!”

The second I turned to apologise, I felt hand on my shoulder, scaring the absolute crap out of me.

“Sorry! I called your name and you didn’t answer. You looked deep in thought,” Bucky said uncertainly. I instantly relaxed in his presence and chuckled.

“It's ok, my fault anyway. I should have been paying attention to what was going on around me. It just gets interesting up here sometimes,” I tapped my head as I spoke.

Great, now he thinks you're a lunatic.

Bucky offered me a small smile, which I had come to expect from him. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Tim. I tried to ignore him. I really did. When he first saw Bucky come over to me his eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. That look of awe turned to one of amusement when he saw me make a complete fool out of myself. I stared pointedly at him until he got the message and returned to his computer. Bucky raised his eyebrows at me, and I shook my head in reply.

So much for Tim’s apology.

Bucky cleared his throat. “Um, Tony sent me to get you. He wanted to talk to you about, er… something computer related, I think.”

“He could have called me, you know. You didn’t have to come all the way down here.”

“He wanted me to get you in person. Plus, I had to talk to someone down in communications anyway.”

I nodded and got up to leave with Bucky, completely forgetting about the system that had me wound up only minutes ago.

~~~~~

Why does elevator music always make everything so uncomfortable and awkward? I was desperately searching for a way to fill the silence but for once in my life my mind was blank. I heard Bucky mumble something, seemingly to himself. I brushed it off before he spoke up more confidently.

“I like your jumper.”

I swear, I had never turned red so quickly. It felt like my whole face was on fire. How did everything he say make me feel so giddy?

“Thanks! But it's actually my friend, Angie’s. She left it at my apartment a few days ago and I haven’t had a chance to return it yet. I don’t know why I said that, it's a lie. She forgot it at mine over a year ago and I really like it.” I didn’t think I could blush any harder. I was wrong.

“You're really close with your two friends, huh?” Bucky questioned. I relaxed quickly. I always found it easier to talk about anything that wasn’t about me directly.

“They're complete idiots, but I love them. They're my family. I'd be lost without them. I mean, Becca’s good fun and Angie is our designated babysitter most of the time.”

He let out a low laugh. “I guess I know how she feels. I'm always running around after Steve, trying to make sure he doesn’t get himself killed.”

“Really?”

Bucky also seemed more at ease with the direction the conversation had taken. “It was worse back in the 40’s though. He was picking fights left, right, and centre. There was no super soldier serum to help him back then. He was just a kid with good intentions and twig-like arms.”

The ding of the elevator interrupted our chat. We stepped out, but I paused before we walked any further. Bucky turned to question me, and I stared open-mouthed at him.

“God, I was such a bitch to Tim!” I exclaimed suddenly, Bucky looking at me in surprise. “He was just trying to help me, and I-.“ I couldn’t even finish my sentence as I was overcome by fit of giggles. “I told him that nobody likes ‘Sharknado’ except for him!”

“Shark what?”

“Have you never heard of ‘Sharknado’? We have to watch it! It's a terrible film.”

“If it's so bad why do I have to watch it?”

“Because, it's a good bad movie. You watch it knowing it's going to be terrible and then you just give out about it afterwards. The full 21st century experience,” I explained to a very perplexed superhero. “Let’s go, best not to leave his royal highness waiting.”

~~~~~

Turns out Tony had summoned me to ask a single question about my work, before requesting advice on the nicest cafés in the area to bring Pepper to. We spent nearly an hour arguing over which is nicer, pancakes or waffles. He refused to accept the fact that pancakes are clearly superior and resorted to folding his arms and huffing like a child.

I finally made a move to leave when Tony told me he had some Avengers business to attend to.

“Next time you want a chat,” I said to him as I put on my jacket,” just give me a call. You didn’t need to send poor Bucky all the way down to me. He probably has better things to be doing.”

Tony snorted. “You’d think so, wouldn’t you? He volunteered to get you. The second I mentioned I needed to talk to you, he all but ran off to find you.”

I scoffed and chose to ignore what Tony had said. “Bye, Mario!” I yelled back to him, making sure to close the door on his sounds of annoyance.

~~~~~

Some people can sense bad things just before it happens. Hairs standing on the back of your neck, chills down your spine. Some sort of sixth sense, I guess. Unfortunately, I wasn’t one of those people.

I was sitting in my empty, broken bathtub with my laptop, as you do, when I heard the crash. My head shot up immediately, staring at my bathroom door that I had left slightly ajar.

“It's nothing, you're imagining things.” I tried to convince myself I was hearing things until I heard what I assumed was one of my mugs crashing to the ground.

I could feel my heart thumping in my chest, and I willed myself to calm down. Placing my laptop carefully aside as quietly as I possibly could, I crawled out of the bath and creeped my way towards the door.

I peered my head out, nervously chewing on my lower lip. It was only a matter of seconds before I gasped and closed the door in panic. I made sure to do so silently and I held a hand over my mouth to control the ragged breaths that I could no longer control.

With shaking hands, I locked the door and took out my phone that felt stuck in my pocket. My only focus was calling the first person that popped into my head.

“Come on, come on,” I muttered, begging for a small ounce of luck.

“Miss me already?”

I sighed in relief. “Tony, there’re people in my apartment. Can you- can you send someone over please. I'm kind of panicking.”

There was a momentary pause and a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the phone before-

“Y/N listen to me. You need to get out of there right now. We’ll be there as fast as we can. Can you get to your front door?”

“I can’t, they’ll see me.”

“Shit,” I heard Tony breath out. “Alright, odds are they’re looking for your laptop so hang tight, hopefully they won’t be looking for you.

I groaned internally and stared at my laptop that I had forgotten about in the bath. Just my luck.

“Yeah, that’s not going to work. My laptop is with me.”

“You bring your laptop to the bathroom?”

“Some people bring their phones, I bring my laptop. Stop judging me.”

Tony decided to ignore my last comment, instead informing me that they were on their way. He asked if I could still hear the people in my apartment.

“Um, no, I don’t think I- “

The bang on the bathroom door made me jump and I clutched the phone tighter. I covered my mouth with my hand, willing myself to stop shaking. A second bang, and I took a few steps backwards slowly. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the door that I knew wouldn’t withstand much more. It took me a few seconds to realise that Tony had been shouting my name.

“Tony,” I whispered,” please tell me you’re nearby.”

I could hear him talking to someone else, his impatient tone not doing anything to reassure me.

“Still 10 minutes out, kid.”

Before Tony could even finish his sentence, the door came crashing down. I screamed, trying to shield my eyes from the splintered wood.

A man dressed entirely in black tactical gear made a move to grab me, and I dropped my phone in a panic.

“TONY!” I screamed. My attempt to remove myself from his grip was futile. He had grabbed my body and dragged me to where the rest of his team were waiting in my now destroyed kitchen. I was so distracted that I didn’t notice the fist that flew towards my face before everything went black.

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