#if i say it enough it'll be true
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this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves. this summer there will be good waves.
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🐮🐮🐮
Not making a new oc. Not making a new oc
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It's definitely not past midnight and I definitely don't have to be up in a few hours.
Nope.
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i do not have the feels for hyeongjun, i do not have the feels. i. do. not. have. feels.
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Honestly the funniest thing about TDP to me is that Rayla for some reason always thinks Callum isn't 100% ride-or-die with her on any given situation. Seriously, she could decide she's jumping off a cliff and he'd do it too--oh wait.
I get that half of it is 'protecting' him but like. Girl he has been ready to die and kill for you since the first snake chain incident. It has not lightened up since. In fact its gotten worse. She's his special little guy and if anything happens to her he will kill everyone in the room and then himself. She physically cannot ever sacrifice herself for anyone because Callum WILL be following her straight into the afterlife in no less than a minute. I'm fully convinced he can and would go even further than Claudia and he'd barely have to think on it for five seconds before shrugging like "damn this sucks, can't believe I have to turn evil" "you literally don't have to--" "no I'm gonna"
And honestly I think that's peak teenagers first girlfriend behavior.
#tdp#the dragon prince#tdp rayla#tdp callum#text post#tdp season 5#rayllum#talk#funny#its so funny to me girl he would KILL EVERYONE FOR YOU (except ez)#HOW WERE YOU SURPRISED HE WAS SO DEAD SET ON HELPING YOUR PARENTS ITS CALLUM#not only that bestie you could put the blade to his throat & he would let you. he wouldnt even fight he'd just let you#he would go so feral for you. release his chains. free him.#he wouldnt say 'please let me kill for you' but he would dramaticaly get on 1 knee & say 'rayla i would kill for you if it came down to it'#as if he wouldnt just do that if someone pushed him enough. i want someone to push his buttons enough. set him off it'll b funny#absence did make the heart grow fonder but i think he overdozed a bit. like just a smidge. theres like way too much fondness now#also its great bc MMMMM how do those callum & viren/claudia parallels FEEL BOYS#WILL DO ANYTHING FOR FAMILY SO TRUE. and also communication issues BUT MOSTLY THE SACRIFICE#hes the number 1 rayla defender. he supports her rights AND her wrongs
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again i'm not saying i self-ship with aventurine but in a modern au the other option of us meeting is he tries to buy out my company and i'm just like "sir this is a non-profit"
#bee chats#if i say i don't self-ship with him enough times it'll be true right#RIGHT#lbr he'd do the research and he'd KNOW but this is funny to me so i'm saying it anyway
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thinking about the person i could have been if i tried a little harder to find my own way
#probably the thing i am resenting my parents for right now is how good they were at convincing me#not to pursue any career paths other than the ones they laid out#every time i was like hey this seems interesting should i check it out? they would be so quick with the#do you care enough about it to stake your livelihood on it? to do it for your whole working life?#and obviously 8 yo 12 yo 14 yo 17 yo 18 yo me would get terrified and go no sorry and just not look into anything further#supposedly this is the safe option but everything i do feels meaningless#all of the jobs in this field seem meaningless#the job market in this field right now is dog shit and I'm fighting like hell for positions that just make me sad to think about#but every time i think hey what if i tried another thing#now my brain shuts me down with the do you care enough about it to stake your livelihood on it#your whole life on it#and the answer is no and it's gonna be no for a long time i bet#don't know if I'll ever find my way out of it#told my roommate's boyfriend about my general dispassion for pretty much everything in life#he asked me if I'm even a person#which feels very true#i feel like this path I've followed if i keep following it#I'm not going to be a person i can be proud of#i know it's really early in my life to say but#idk if it's nature or nurture or my own damn fault but all the ambition has been weaned out of me and I've been getting just surviving#i just wish i got told more you can be whatever you want to be :)#instead of whatever you'll do you'll be good at so do what makes money and push your hobbies to the side you can do them after you retire#your mom likes this and you're good at it so you'll like it too it'll make you money this is the best thing#the other thing is harder and doesn't make as much money don't do that you won't like it that much i bet#when i was younger#maybe I'd be struggling more but I'd be really happy and fulfilled#or maybe this is genuinely the best timeline and eggs who tried to pursue art hates it now#maybe I'd be really stupid at all the other things i gave a passing glance at#eggsistential speaks#tag rant
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glen powell host/chappell roan musical guest will be the snl s50 premiere episode just you wait
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*sighs in post mildly broke containment again* there's nothing wrong with reading willow as a lesbian, this is a piece of fiction, and the post I made took on a jokey tone for a reason and is ultimately more about underlying bi-erasure on tv than anything else kaybye ✌
#im watching btvs#jeepers creepers but btvs is bringing out the *taking it all very seriously in a very morally high-and-mighty kind of way* crowd#and i dont mean about shit that matters such as discussing racism or misogyny in fandom#just about whether you agree or dislike someone's read of a situation - move on my friend if you dont agree#i mean i could go on a rant about HOW the show portrayed willow-the-now-lesbian#(and while im at it why i hc buffy-the-apparent-heterosexual as bi too but nobody has disputed that part oddly enough)#but that would be an effort im truly not interested in expending on this day and possibly never and has been written before#im mostly just live-blogging and moving on#if im writing anything fanfic-wise it'll be about kendra and that'll be my full fandom contribution#ok but the ONE thing i'll mention is the fight willow has with tara which is one of the rare Ls for tara#where she basically admits that she's afraid this is a phase because willow has loved men/been with oz#and that's just an interesting fight from a meta perspective because the idea that bi women have to *choose a side*#and are consistently questioned and doubted by their lesbian partners#is a core element of biphobia within a gay relationship that many people can attest to#hell it's a big part of bisexual rep that is conscious of itself that at some point there's a plotline where the person is questioned#about their true loyalties and asked to take a side#btvs ofc is NOT conscious of this underlying tension and in fact i would argue is agreeing with tara that this is what needs to happen#for several other reasons as well#but literally people have WRITTEN about this im not saying anything bold and controversial here AND it doesnt take away#from lesbian willow reads to acknowledge the flawed approach of the show to her sexuality like come on#willow rosenberg
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I do not begrudge my extroverted coworkers their need to talk.
I do not begrudge my extroverted coworkers their need to talk.
I do not begrudge my extroverted coworkers their need to talk.
I do not begrudge my extroverted coworkers their need to talk.
#if i say it enough#maybe it'll become true#they talk so loud#can't focus on work#but they need their connections and chatter
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yeah yeah i disappeared and stopped playing almost entirely i shouldve expected that to happen because this is what i do when my hyperfixation changes WHATEVER. BUT. I finally got around to uprooting those zero dawn and jwe2 shots, so expect those soon :D
i still have to find the ark shots. where are those. i think theyre on the new pc but idk nvm i looked for like two seconds and i found them ok
Yay I have all the pictures!!!! i will post them SOON i SWEAR
#beware for they may not actually be posted soon#i tend to do that lmao#but HOPEFULLY they will be out soon#horizon zero dawn#jwe2#ark survival ascended#photo mode#blah blah blah usual tags#whatever idk there arent any actual photos in here#but there WILL BE. there will be. if i say it enough it'll be true right#who am i even talking to#im just. screaming into the void lmao
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*staring myself down in a mirror* i will not lose my mind doing calc hw today i will not lose my mind doing calc hw today i will not lose my mind
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I'm stuck in some kind of purgatory where my mother keeps asking me over and over to explain depression to her (my behavior when I'm showing symptoms of it) but every time I try to tell her about depression as a concept she says it's not real. and then we do it again. and again
#like I cant explain my behaviour any other way.#why did I spend several months sleeping most of the time and staring at the wall doing nothing?#depression!#but depression doesn't exist#so what can I say to her.#well I guess that I'm lazy and I want to feel special that's why I cultivate this mental state#and if I just decided what I don't want to be lazy and stop trying to feel special in this way–then it'll just stop#well that's not true and I won't say that and I think that this won't satisfy even her#like she knows that this behavior is 'abnormal' and beyond laziness or teenage (or more like young-adult) angst#but she won't accept the only real explanation#this is driving me insane it feels like some kind of mental torture#fuck. I'm so sorry but I remembered that tng ep where picard is tortured by cardassians#and they're trying to make him believe there's two lights when there's only one or whatever#sorry.#but that's literally what it feels like#to pass this test I have to believe in something that's not true#the truth doesn't work and if I just lie it won't be good enough#I have to convince myself of some third option (that I cant even think of) believe in it and then present it to my mother#vent
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i'm normal about him i'm normal about him i'm normal about him i'm normal about him i'm norm--
#.disco#maybe if i say it enough times it'll come true#joe keery#djo#stranger things#steve harrington#spree#kurt kunkle#sunshine boy#lookie him smile#:D
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🕯️🕯️🕯️ princess polycule w/ cinderella snow elody little mermaid & rosamund 🕯️🕯️🕯️
#if i say it enough times it'll be true#neverafter#neverafter ep 4#neverafter spoilers#d20 neverafter#dimension 20#princess rosamund du prix#cinderella neverafter#snow white neverafter#little mermaid neverafter#princess elody
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One more final and freedom shall be mine. Today's final was a rollercoaster, but I'm confident that I passed nonetheless! I'm very happy with my work this week and gladly, I'll have time to rest today and tomorrow either playing or getting slowly back to writing, as the last final is the predictable kind and the content load to study isn't as dramatic as it was the one of yesterday! Hope you peeps have been doing well ♥︎
#man I thought that leaving 6 blank was embarrassing enough#which eventually I didn't because I'm that way™#and I know for a fact that 2 / 6 are correct#I didn't bother to look up the rest#because I don't want to#it'll remain a mystery until I get the grades on Monday#but the roast and shade my classmates spared the teacher#over the W.hatsapp group holy frick#it must've been bad enough to them to be seething over it#oh well#so long as I passed I won't say anything#not to mention that the teacher asked me how it went#and when I answered her 'I don't know'#because it's true that I genuinely don't know if I messed up big time or not#she said that she believes in me 🥺#I hope she won't get the scare when she corrects my test djfhg
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