#if i keep drawing only kel then kel will be the only thing i’ll be able to draw lol

[raiiny-bay]

circling back to this. uh. i think i might try this actually

i think i need to start drawing other people's OCs

[br0-k3n-sch00lb01]

note: highly suggest you read this before you read this part :3

He took the lead. Kel, Aubrey, and Hero followed him up the stairs and through the tree stump. 

Aubrey ran ahead, tugging Omori along. “Come on, slowpoke, we gotta go to the playground!!” She said.

They walked down the steps of the Forest Playground. Aubrey called out as she pulled Omori to Mari’s picnic blanket. “MARIII!! BASILLLL!! We found him!!” She exclaimed. 

Mari looked up. “Oh, thank god-” She stood up and ran over, hugging Omori. “Thank god you’re okay, little brother.. I was so worried…”

Basil merely glanced up. “Hi,” he mumbled, and went back to the sketchbook he was drawing in.

Omori raised an eyebrow. That sort of thing wasn’t unusual for Basil, per se, but it was still a bit hurtful to say the least.

Aubrey tilted her head and looked over to Mari. “Is Basil alright?” She asked. 

Mari sighed. “He’s…alright, yes.” She replied, solemnly.

“You don’t seem so sure about that.” Hero said.

“I’m not so sure about it, actually…” Mari frowned. 

Omori looked over at his friend on the picnic blanket, studying his face and seeing the deep focus on it.

He didn’t draw often. He had mentioned to Omori in the past that it was a sort of stress reliever. 

Omori sighed and sat down next to Basil. Neither of them said anything. 

The others sat back down on the picnic blanket as usual, and the only sounds were Basil’s pencil scratching on the paper and light chatting.

Finally, Basil spoke. 

“I’m glad you’re back.” He said, flatly.

Omori nodded.

“Still not gonna talk to me, huh?” Basil replied, not looking up.

Omori looked down.

“Typical… I guess I should expect that…”

There was silence between the two. The tension was so thick you could probably cut it with a knife.

“Where’d you disappear off to, anyways? Did you finally get sick of us?”

Omori didn’t know how to respond to that. No, he hadn’t gotten sick of his friends.

“Sorry, that was mean of me to ask. I’m just paranoid, I guess.”

Paranoid was an understatement, considering this was Basil.

“I was scared that you didn’t like us anymore. That maybe we’d done something wrong and you were leaving Vast Forest forever.”

Omori hadn’t intended on that.

“But, you’re back. So that’s good.”

Omori nodded.

“Promise me something…” Basil’s voice quieted somewhat. “Promise me you won’t ever leave again.”

Omori flinched a bit, glancing up and looking into Basil’s eyes for the first time in a while.

“Promise me, no matter what happens, we’ll always be there for each other.” Basil repeated.

They stared at each other.

Those words were vaguely familiar.

Omori nodded firmly.

A hint of a smile tugged at Basil’s lips. He closed the sketchbook and set it down.

The others seemed to freeze. Omori looked around, up, anywhere. 

A shadowy figure, striding confidently across the playground, caught his attention, and he internally groaned.

Stranger.

The shadow came to a stop in front of Omori, their glowing white eyes fixed directly on him.

“Hello, Dreamer.” They said, in that annoying accent that somehow was also slightly charming. “You’re back, I see.”

Omori gazed back up at them for a moment. “Yes, I’m back.” He replied. 

“Good. I-”

“What do you want this time, Stranger?”

Stranger frowned at being cut off. “I merely wished to speak with you about the conditions of Headspace.” They said, with a bit more bite than before.

“Fine. Speak, then.” 

“Do not talk back to me, Dreamer.”

“You’re not the boss around here.”

“...Correct, but I’m helping you, so if you would shut your trap for a moment I would greatly appreciate it.”

Omori was about to retort, but he shut up for his own sake.

“Thank you.” Stranger said, their eyes narrowing. “Anyhow. You cannot keep coming back here. The same thing will happen every time. You’ll go insane.”

Omori tilted his head. “And?”

Stranger pinched the bridge of their nose. “You’re insufferable. Shut up.”

Omori closed his mouth again, glaring at the shadow boy.

“For the last time. Wake up and go away. I’ll handle your friends, you need to handle the truth and help Basil.” Stranger said. “Don’t make me force you. You are more than capable of doing this yourself.” 

Omori scoffed. “Force me? You can’t force me to do anything.”

Stranger grabbed Omori firmly by the arms. “Yes, I can. WAKE UP.”

Sunny woke up with a start.

This was not his bed. Not his house.

The memories of last night hit him like a tidal wave, and he realized- this was Basil’s bed. 

He turned away from the wall to see a head of bristly blonde hair in front of his eyes.

Sunny carefully got out of bed and walked towards the door, the floorboards creaking beneath his feet.

“Sunny?” Basil mumbled.

Sunny froze. 

“Where are you going?” Basil asked.

“...the…bathroom?” Sunny tried.

“Yeah, likely story. Stop trying to leave, I’m not letting you go.”

“Isn’t that.. technically kidnapping me?”

“No. Shut up.”

Silence.

“Come back over here, please.” Basil said, his voice quieting.

Sunny did so, sitting on the bed next to Basil. 

He took a breath. “My mom is coming to pick me up from my house with my stuff at eleven.” 

Basil frowned. “No.”

“What do you mean, ‘no’?”

“I’ve finally got you back. Do you think I’m going to let you go? You’re not going anywhere.”

“...What?”

“You’re staying here, with me.”

“Who says?” “I do. You are not leaving me again. I can’t be alone again. You promised me, Sunny.”

“...What?”

“YOU PROMISED!!”

“What did I promise?”

“That we’d be there for each other!! YOU PROMISED ME, SUNNY, YOU PROMISED ME—”

“OKAY!! Hush!!”

There was a knock on the door.

“Hey, uhh… What are you two yelling about in there?” Hero’s voice asked.

“NOTHING.” Basil replied.

“Can I come in…?” 

“...no-”

Sunny cut Basil off. “Yes.”

Basil shot Sunny a glare, digging his nails into Sunny’s arm.

Hero opened the door.

“Are you oka-”

Aubrey raced in.

“Look, whatever’s going on with you two, cut it out already! And Basil, you prick, stop doing that, you’re hurting him.” She pried Basil’s hand away from Sunny’s arm. “This is why I hate you. You’re so selfish.” Aubrey said to him.

“SELFISH?!” Basil screamed. “I. AM NOT. SELFISH!!”

“Calm your pretty fucking head down. You sure as hell are selfish.” Aubrey said.

Basil slapped her straight on the face.

Aubrey blinked. “What. the. FUCK?? Did you just slap me?”

Basil gritted his teeth. “Yes.”

“WHAT THE HELL? That hurt, you little-”

Hero yelled. “Okay, both of you SHUT UP!!”

Aubrey fell silent. Even Basil didn’t retort.

“You need to stop thinking that yelling and hurting each other is going to solve anything. We all know damn well it isn’t.” Hero said sternly. “Understood?”

Basil and Aubrey both nodded. Hero looked at Sunny. “That means you too, Sunny. Just because you’ve had it tough and we haven’t seen you for a while doesn’t mean I forgot you.”

Sunny nodded too.

[lurantis1]

I’m thinking of making an entire au with the last suggestion i send you. Also here’s the redo version of the song:

(Kel to George)

When you’re heavy hearted, or when your spirits low,

Just hum your favorite melodies nd happiness will show,

You may have lost your love but, you’re still moving on,

Think of all the memories and please keep living on!

(Kel to Brenda)

When you’re feeling hopeless and nothing seems to work,

Let’s swing and dance into the beat and give a little smirk,

You may have lost your dreams but, you’re still here moving on,

So think of what you still have left and please keep living on!

(Kel to Dave)

When you’re feeling gloomy, cause people put you down,

Just be yourself, don’t give an inch! Erase that simple frown,

They may have told you many things, but you’re still moving on,

Be faithful of what is to come and please keep living on!

(Kel to All)

When you’re feeling lonely, or when you’re feeling lost,

Remember all that i have said, and listen to the songs,

You may have lost so many thing, but please keep moving on,

Keep me deep down in your hearts, and please keep living on!

(Living on, please keep living on, keep me deep down in your hearts and please keep living on!)

When I’m feeling lonely, (George)

Or when I’m feeling lost, (Brenda)

I’ll remember all that you have said, (Dave)

And listen to the songs, (George, Brenda, Dave)

We may have lost so many things, but we’re still moving on, (George, Brenda, Dave)

Thinking of you in our hearts and we’ll be…

Living…

On…

(George, Brenda, Dave)

I’m making an entire AU. I’m sorry. I think I’m obsessed but i need your thoughts because you’re the only clover lover i know 😭

THiS SONG MADE ME CRY-

I really like this au idea and I want to draw more of this if u don’t mind

I kinda wanna make a animatic of this for some reason or at least some redraws

[whatisthiswritingthing]

Top or Bottom -Emily Sonnett x Reader

Prompt: Can you do a jealous Emily Sonnett imagine? Like where Y/N ex came to a practice and try to get back with Y/N. But does not know that Y/N and Emily are together because it’s still new. And Emily kisses Y/N in front of everyone and shocks the team? All feels to!!!

“Y/N!”

Y/N paused mid step as the players all made their way to vans to go back to the hotel after practice. Emily walked into Y/N’s back at the unexpected stop. The rest of the players all chuckled at Sonnett while she tried to catch herself and avoid knocking Y/N over, Y/N still not looking away from the person who had called her name.

“Yo! Y/L/N, what’s the hold up?” Lavelle commented.

“Uh nothing,” Y/N replied vaguely, not paying attention, and beginning to walk toward the woman standing of to the side.

The rest of the group all stopped as well, watching the soccer play approach the other woman.

“What are you doing here Brooke?” Y/N pulled her arm away when Brooke tried to reach out.

“I wanted to talk to you,” Brooke awkwardly pulled her hands back at the rejection.

“I think we talked plenty last time,” Y/N crossed her arms, posture rigid.

“I know, probably more than we should have. But I think we both made a mistake; said things we shouldn’t have. I miss you Y/N,” she reached forward again, this time in succeeding in resting a hand on Y/N forearm. “I want us to try again, try to work things out.”

“Brooke, we didn’t work for a reason, there’s no point in hashing this all out again.”

“Y/L/N!”

Y/N turned her body to look back to the rest of the team, seeing several of them all waving her towards them, some looking confused.

“Look, I got to go. I hope you’re doing well, but things are better this way Brooke.”

“Y/N wait,” she reached out again, stopping Y/N from leaving. “Is your number the same? Can I call you?”

“Uh yea, it is, but…”

“I’ll call you!” Brooke cut off.

“Y/L/N! Let’s go! I’m hungry!”

Y/N glanced between Brooke and her team, she sighed and shook her head before jogging toward the team without saying anything.

“Who’s the blonde stud?” Pinoe teased, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

Y/N blushed, “oh umm, my ex.”

“Got a piece of the Y/N/N and came back for more?” Ashlyn joined the ribbing, nudging her shoulder as they all got in the bus.

“Eww it was nothing like that,” Y/N crinkled her nose at the crass comment.

“Drop it guys,” Kelley cut off before the two eccentric soccer players when she could see then about to continue their teasing. Kelley was one of the few people aware of the fresh relationship between her best friend and Y/N.

The blonde defender had gone quiet when Y/N had gone over to speak to her ex, watching the interaction with rapt attention. Their relation was quite new, only established a month prior and that was after several months of both avoiding their feelings and Emily patiently waiting for Y/N to be ready for a new relationship.

There was an odd tension in the van, Kelley was normally one of the main instigators of teasing. So, everyone found it odd when the defender shut it down so quickly.

As everyone got out of the vans at the hotel, Alex hopped up behind the pair of defenders, looping her arms over both their shoulders.

“So, you and Y/N?” Alex smiled, squeezing Kelley’s shoulder.

Both the defenders rolled their eyes and shrugged Alex off themselves.

“Where the hell did you even get that from?”

“Ash said you shut down teasing her about Y/N’s ex pretty quick, that’s pretty girlfriendy wormy.”

“Really Janice? I have a girlfriend.”

Sonnett remained silent the whole time, slowly wandering away from everyone else.

“Hey you,” Y/N smiled when Sonnett opened her door, stepping into the room and placing a delicate kiss on her lips.

“Hey,” the defender whispered. Anxiously wringing her fingers, biting her bottom lip.

Y/N stayed close, stopping the nervous fidgeting by bringing them up to her lips to kiss her knuckles. Dropping one hand, she soothed a thumb over her over her crinkled eyebrow.

“You ok?”

Sonnett gave a small nod, refusing to meet Y/N’s eyes. Y/N didn’t say anything, just pulled her girlfriend into her arms, wrapping her in a tight hug. She knew whatever it was that was bothering the defender just needed to be processed. Sonnett sighed and nestled herself in closer. Y/N could feel some of the tension leave Emily’s body.

Y/N placed a kiss to her hairline, swaying them softly. She moved a hand to gently massage the remaining tension from her neck.

“The team thinks you’re dating Kelley,” Sonnett mumbled into Y/N’s chest.

Y/N froze, pulling away slightly to look Sonnett in the eye. Sonnett tugged herself back into Y/N’s chest, Y/N allowed it, running a hand up and down her back, waiting for her to explain more.

“Her telling them to stop in the van was girlfriendy Alex said.”

Y/N nodded along, resuming her swaying.

“Why was Brooke at practice?”

“She wanted to talk,” Y/N couldn’t hide the disgust in her voice.

That got Sonnett to pull away and make eye contact. Whether the reaction was from the reason Brooke was here or Y/N’s tone and significant disgust.

“I said no, but it sounds like she still has my number, I don’t have hers.”

Sonnett gave her a soft smile at the obvious distain at wanting to interact with her ex. She stretched up and kissed Y/N on the cheek. As Sonnett pulled away Y/N’s eyebrows creased in confusion, then loosened, a look of realization crossing her face.

“You have nothing to worry about Em,”

“I know, like realistically I know, and then Alex thought it was Kelley. I don’t know, I got jealous I guess.”

“Jealous?”

“Yea everyone gets to be in a relationship with you, but I’m actually in one with you.”

Y/N nodded again, “do you want to tell people?”

“No, I don’t know,” Sonnett now pulled away, running a frustrated hand through her hair.

Y/N waited patiently while Emily worked her thoughts out, “no, I don’t want to tell anyone yet. Look at how intrusive just Pinoe and Ash were from you talking to your ex for a minute? I’m not ready for that coming from the entire team.”

“Hey, I agree Em. What we have is good, Kelley is somehow behaving for once. That alone should be reason to keep it as it is,” Y/N grinned, it grew when she saw Emily giving her a large smile.

Kelley had been there for Sonnett while she worked her feelings for Y/N out, being her sounding board and encouraging her to act on the shared feelings. It had taken months of the two skirting the line of friendship for months, tentatively becoming more only a month ago. Both were very cautious, private people, so they both agreed taking it slow and keeping it to themselves for now.

“If us being together is what keeps Kel in line, then we should stay together,” Sonnett laughed out.

The next morning, Y/N was called off to the side by her ex as soon as they arrived at the field. This time it had gotten the attention of the entire team, all of them making kissy sounds as Y/N returned to the group.

“So, there’s the blonde, Kell is the brunette, what color is next? Red?” Pinoe teased her.

“Nah, been there done that,” Y/N tried to play along, hoping to keep it vague and not encourage more questions.

“Ahh staying with the brunettes then. Way to go Kelley!” Rose piped up.

“You have no idea, you should see my girlfriend,” Kelley winked, “way hotter than this schmuck.” She was hoping to draw some of the attention to herself and off Sonnett. Sonnett gave her a grateful smile when she realized what she was doing.

“You sure she’s an ex Y/N?” Mal motioned to Y/N’s ex who had remained the entire practice.

“Completely sure,” Y/N cocked her head to the side, looking over to Brooke again, who gave her a smile and wiggled her fingers to wave.

Y/N jogged over to the fence to once again speak to her ex.

Sonnett continued to watch her girlfriend, who was clearly frustrated as she ran over. But had to remain with the team, listening to them speculate about the relationship and who else Y/N might be seeing.

“There’s the heartbreaker!” Ash called as Y/N walked back, everyone having seen Brooke leave the fence clearly upset.

Fed up with hearing everyone’s comments on her girlfriends relationship status, Emily stood up abruptly, taking determined steps towards Y/N.

Y/N slowed her step, confusion evident on her face at the sudden approach of her girlfriend.

Emily reached up and grabbed both sides of Y/N’s face and pulled her in to a sound kiss. Every ones mouths fell open, some gasping softly.

“The fuck Disani? You and Y/N,” Lindsey was the first to speak up.

“I don’t really go around kissing random people, especially not teammates, so yea, me and Y/N,” Sonnett smiled, sliding a hand down to tangle her fingers together with Y/N’s. She nervously glanced to Y/N to make sure the action was alright, Y/N gave her a reassuring smile in return.

Several people all tried to speak at the same time, causing Sonnett to nervously lean further into Y/N’s side.

“You all have 30 seconds to react, after that you have five questions that we may or may not answer, then we will go back like nothing happened,” Y/N cut everyone off.

Everyone reacted loudly, speaking over each other.

“Alright, times up. Quick little Q & A, then we are done.”

“Is that five questions each or as a team?” Rose asked first.

“As a team; that’s one.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes; that’s two.”

“Rose! Stop asking questions!” Alex smacked her arm. Everyone else shooting her glares.

“You guys only have three questions left, better make them good.”

“How long have you been together?”

“A month; that’s three.”

“Who asked out who?”

“Lame, Sonnett asked me; that’s four, don’t fuck it up Rose.”

“Top or bottom?”

“Really Rose? You go from losing two questions, to that?” Lindsey rolled her eyes.

The couple both cringed at the unexpected personal question. “I’m not sure you are old enough for that info,” Y/N winked.

[catnip-feathers]

Some vague implications along the lines of things that’d fall under “general omori content warnings” below the cut but nothing was really said directly. Also more rambling from me lol

Fun thing (not really from a character’s standpoint), Mari is not the only Something. Her full title as a Something would be “Something in the Wind/Something Behind You”. Somethings are creatures that manifest from the troubles of the residents of Faraway Town, and since nobody is truly untroubled, everyone has one. Usually people who are generally fine only have Little Ones. Hero has his own version of Something in the Walls. Not everyone calls them “Somethings”, and they’re treated kind of like urban legends and are referred to by many names.

Sunny being unable to die is sort of a major conflict point. Like imagine having trouble finding a reason to even want to live to next week and yet the world didn’t ask and now he’s gonna outlive all his friends too. At least they can probably come visit like Mari does. And to clarify, it isn’t true immortality, so he can technically “die” but always wakes up again.

Kim is treated as a part of the main group a lot of the time because Aubrey likes to drag her along. She gets along with everyone at least somewhat, but aside from Aubrey she gets along with Kel best surprisingly. He’s always the first one to jump on the chaos train lmao

The cult I mentioned is its own thing, kind of a run of the mill RPG cult sorts thing (it can probably be compared to something in an Elder Scrolls game because I keep unintentionally taking inspiration from it gjskfjdmflejwmffkdk) but they have guns and vans and always travel in groups of four. I don’t have much information on them right now other than Mari has turned into Hellmari to scare them off a couple of times and a few of them fear her which I find funny-

I have a habit of making “I do what I want” AUs with my current hyperfixations, although I never really share them unless they’re almost entirely OC-based. They’re just a form of self-entertainment, and by not sharing them I don’t have to be afraid of judgement and don’t have to change things for other people, so I can do whatever I feel comfortable with. By sharing this information I’m definitely stepping outside of my comfort zone, but if it makes other people happy that makes me happy. ^^’

Since it’s a personal AU I don’t think I’ll ever make it into a comic or a fanfic, but I do have a handful of drawings if you’d like to see those-

I find it funny how in the good ending of Omori, Sunny says "I have to tell you something" but in one of my AUs half an hour later it's "I have to show you Something" and then basically this

[starkcanvas]

Do you have a full-body concept art of Pokémon AU Mari? I think you said before the context is set in Legends: Arceus, and I’m looking at the clothing options (you can find them on Serebii in case you’re like me, too lazy to fire up the Switch lol) and I think the Patterned Kimonos Fletching III or Harlequin I would fit Mari well, if only because they’re purple. There’s also the Everyday Kimono Amethyst if she wants to go plain. :)

Oh, actually, when I talked about with others, we have it that Mari doesn’t really stay at Jubilife Village lmao like, at all ^^;

The headcanon I have is that when Mari does end up in the past along with Hero and Kel (that’s the context for this specific scenario) Hero’s the only one out of the 3 who still keeps his memories- so Mari ends up with amnesia and unlike Hero, she isn’t found nearby the village.

She’s found out in the middle of the Coronet Highlands by a group of Gible being led by an Alpha one. Said Pokemon gathering materials from humans for her to use- including cloaks and things like that. So, really, she’d kinda be wearing her sweater vest without her little red ribbon and basic jeans, both being torn and ripped up a bit and then topping it all off with a long cloak she wraps up in and wears it like a cape/cloak.

Her also having some fabric wrapped around the right side of her face with healing herbs due to her heavily damaging that eye when landing in the past. Her eye does eventually heal in the form of it not getting infected but that side or her face is now pretty scarred and her right eye is blind. Her covering it up with her bangs most of the time.

But over the 4 years she stay’s in the past, due to her having little to no interaction with anything that could help her remember who she originally was, her personality hardens heavily. Going from a very shy, nervous and scared young girl at 15, to a brutal, stubborn and hardcore battler at 19. She also sharpens her canines, further adding to her “intimidating dragon tamer” appearance. She does out-grow her old outfit and shoes so it is eventually replaced, but when she raids other people’s camps for supplies lmao

I’ll see if I can provide a full profile of what I mean later as for right now, all I got is an old drawing I did of 19-year old Mari and her Alpha Garchomp, Rush. (Btw- all of Mari’s Pokemon are male- they are very overprotective of their girl lol)

As for the Reaper cloth as the hanker-chief on her head. Big no lmao if you asked her to try that, with her normal personality, she’d probably say yes, but uh, as an amnesiac Dragon Tamer, she’d order her Hydreigon to Dragon Pulse you into Alabaster Icelands xD Do not test her lmfao

[faolanmoon]

I've been working on this for days smh. I love Wings of Fire, like seriously I own every book, hell I have a signed copy of one of the books! Anyways, so OmorixWoF AU, I do not have that much art of it yet because three moons the dragon designs have so much detail I wanna chop my hand of !

Some things really had to change, like what to do about Omori and Mari’s death…

No, Omori isn’t an alter ego in this Au, he’s his own dragon. I seriously don't think the Dreamworld would exist in this AU, especially IF I decide Mari dies. Death is actually extremely common in Wings of Fire, with how violent the books can get. Especially in Legends:Darkstalker, holy shit that book is violent, but as a bloodthirsty reader that likes a good fight and death scene, I don't have a problem with that, some people might though. Also there is NO way Sunny can kill her in this AU with how dragon ages work in WoF, a dragon is considered an adult at age 7( human years) and the older the dragon, the larger it is. So IF Mari dies it would've happened when her and Hero were 3, making the rest 1, seriously, Sunny, Kel, Basil and Aubrey would be TINY in size comparison. And since dragons that are 1 would kinda be the same thing as a 5 yro child, Sunny pretty much can't kill her, she literally can't get shoved down the stairs and die, impossible especially with the technology in WoF. Last time I checked Sunny's the youngest, so I don't even think he'd be able to even fly yet, and the only way I can see Mari possibly dying involves her getting struck down mid flight so I'm really not sure...

Since Omori is his own dragon instead of being an alter ego, I had to change him up in some ways. Because I don’t think it’s possible for the dreamworld to exist, Sunny and Omori have a different dynamic. Since there’s both mind readers, Omori first encounters Sunny , telepathically for a good while. Sunny is pretty damn confused on what this voice in his head he’s hearing is and isn’t sure if he should trust him or not. Omori then has to start playing mind games to earn his trust ,which works until Sunny learns who he truly is and why he’s only using telepathy, basically Omori got sealed in a tomb to presumably rot away since he seemed nearly impossible to harm and is likely an evil animus, not very trustworthy at all. Omori still keeps trying to use him, likely to get him to set him free and ends up using animus magic to both harm and allow him to tap into his mind. Eventually at some point Sunny decided he’s had enough of his shit and tells his friends about the weird evil dragon that he hears in his head hoping any of them would know anything that could stop Omori from harming him, perhaps if any of them know an animus that could use their magic to enchant something to protect him from Omori. Unfortunately I haven’t decided what happens next, so cliffhanger?

Anyways, naming time!

Nightwings: Dreamwalker(Sunny) Kindness(Mari) and Omen(Omori)

Rainwings: Charming( Hero) Konjac(Kel)

Skywing: Aella( Aubrey)

Leafwing: Balsam( Basil)

this AU is still a W.I.P ;/; but I’ll happily explain some stuff if there’s any questions .

I need to draw more dragons…my hand better not die …

[dustward]

What exactly was Omori trying to be? The more I think about it, the more unsure I feel with my answer. Wasn’t sure if I enjoyed or hated my experience with the game and did my best to understand why I couldn’t decide. Mild and perhaps major spoilers to follow as I realize my own, personal conclusion of the game’s pros and cons. This is gonna have to be a multi-parter with this first part showcasing what I liked about the game, my background going into it, and how I perceived the game in general.

I’ve yet to play Earthbound. I have at least a couple friends constantly suggesting I get to it, and I want to! The backlog is heavy, alas. Any Earthbound influences aside from the supposed parent by phone and general visual approach go over my head. I’ve played Yume Nikki and fully understand its influences here, even if I can’t put it all into words. Two other Earthbound-like indie RPGs may come up as I analyze my thoughts: Undertale, and the one I feel will be most important to this analysis: The Lisa games.

I want to voice my likes, the pros, since I feel the need to clarify I enjoyed a lot about this game. The art style was a unique take that's definitely memorable, and the music, which varied in quality, was still a variety I very much appreciated. The various styles of music suited the various styles the game itself took, and that’s probably the only aspect of the game at large I felt reached a “harmony”

I loved Aubrey, unapologetically so. First in the headspace and later in Faraway. She’s the only character I felt I truly understood. Perhaps as a direct consequence of that, I hated Kel. I understand why people would like him, but at every turn he’d do something that’d cause me internal frustration. Meanwhile, every single thought I had, Aubrey would sooner or later echo herself in both iterations. We were 100% in sync in that way.

I wanted to love Basil. The realization that you simply were not allowed to interact with him much in either world was a personal disappointment, but not one I hold against the game.

I appreciated both Hero and Mari for what they brought to the story, being pillars of support, a foundation that kept everything else together. I understand quite readily that with Mari’s death and Hero’s departure there was no chance of things getting mended in those 3 years, until he returned.

I loved the environments. I enjoyed exploring the various areas when it came to headspace. The town I have less of an opinion of, but the surprise of being able to leave your house and explore it started off as a positive and that much must be noted.

I loved the rpg aspect. Enjoyed the Emotion System and the variety certain boss fights offered with it. I didn’t experiment too much with standard skills, but I made sure to mess with the different emotional states of both my party and the enemy when I could. In the end, I wound up preferring to keep them sad while Aubrey wailed on them in an angry state, though when that wasn’t an option I happily adjusted my strategy. The Sweetheart boss fight in particular was my favorite, followed by the Slime Girls. I’m aware of optional boss fights I did not encounter and if there’s any draw to ever returning to this game, it’d be to try those out. Alas, I don’t think I’ll ever feel that urge.

Despite these likes, there were issues that went along with them. The Humphrey fight dragged on far longer than it needed to. The rpg mechanics I so enjoyed felt unnecessary in Faraway. Maybe that first Aubrey fight? Or maybe that second one? The rest felt like filler. The characters within the headspace had potential undermined by the major issue I had with the game, and I suppose it’s about time I got into that, huh?

I saw this as three separate games:

There was the Omori side of things, a standard, fantasy-like rpg following the titular character on a quest with his friends. Leveling up, doing sidequests, learning about the (headspace) world and having an ultimate goal of trying to find your dear friend Basil.

The second aspect, the Town section, felt like a narrative venture with a strong emphasis on story beats. There was a tale to tell there about where everyone wound up and what the world was really like, the one Sunny chose to hide from all these years.

And then there was what we’ll call the Yume Nikki part of the game. The part that involved going through distorted spaces, happening upon the most peculiar sights, and attempting to understand and perceive the importance of these sights for our protagonist and ourselves. This third part blended into both the Omori and Sunny aspects, particular examples being Black Space and the moments where Sunny confronts his fears at home.

All three of these aspects feel necessary to tell the greater story, but something about how they interact with each other bothered me. Was it the order they were told in? Did the general mechanics not suit all three parts of the game? The tonal shifts between all three and within each individually were all over the place. The whiplash hurt and broke my immersion time and time again.

Perhaps this game would’ve been better divided into two or maybe even three separate games. I wish I had a better answer as to how it would all work out, but it just feels like parts of Omori would not blend, like water and oil.

The story heavy beats of the Sunny side weighed down the ability to enjoy the Omori side, as I’d want to know what’s happening to the real iterations of these characters; They’re the ones that mattered, after all. Meanwhile, the gameplay-centric Omori side suddenly had to take a backseat to all this real world, lengthy exposition. Coupled with the inevitable curiosity of exploring Sunny’s mundane town made me torn in wanting to rush back to the more interesting Headspace while wanting to make sure to explore as much of Faraway as possible, just in case I might miss something important there.

I’m aware leaving the house and exploring the town are optional, but how could I not want to see what that side of the game had to offer? Even if I wanted to get back to the Omori side as soon as possible. How could I enjoy the battles, bosses, and wacky antics Omori and co. were getting up to when I saw Aubrey broken and abandoned while the real Basil was alone, with the pair of them visibly in pain from both Mari’s loss and the the loss of their closest friends? How could I take the scarier moments, jumpscare or not, seriously when I’m too busy thinking about the fact the game wouldn’t let me have a moment to talk with Aubrey. It sure was okay with letting me interact with Kel. There was too much going on, all at once.

If Omori had been its own game, the first of 2, it would’ve been so much easier to isolate its quirky journey that slowly devolved into a more solemn distortion of Sunny’s psyche. Having a sequel game, Sunny, would allow for the late reveals to the truth of characters like Berly, Sweetheart, and Sunny’s friends that felt necessary so as to not devalue their role in the narrative. Giving away the game and showing Headspace for what it was, Sunny’s imagination, took a lot of the enthusiasm for exploring it away. There was this feeling once I started going through the town...that Headspace didn’t matter.

It felt as though what happened there had no impact on the greater story at large. This was no more than 1/3rd into the game I was left feeling like this, and it definitely sucked some enjoyment out of exploring the Pyrefly Forest, Sweetheart’s Castle, Last Resort, etc.. And based on the good ending, it seems I was right. All that the Omori side of the game (which was well over 2/3rds I think?) served to do was explain some aspects of what Sunny was going through, and not necessarily how he felt about said events in his life - simply the fact these things happened. I learned more about Aubrey, Kel, Hero, and Basil from seeing their change in character between Headspace and Faraway than I ever learned about Sunny himself, and so I ask again - What was the point of Omori?

I don’t think the game itself knew. I think it was too busy playing off its inspirations to understand not only what its own story and characters needed in structure, but what the player’s needs would be as they went through it all. Sunny’s side of things was very much not an rpg, and yet it was forced into that formula. The Yume Nikki side of things somewhat worked within the game’s framework, but there was still that issue of tonal shifts and mood whiplash.

And to reiterate before moving on to part 2 of this thoughtdump - I understand my reaction to this game is a fringe case. Most loved it for what it was. I just think it could’ve been something...more.

[gamergirl929]

I’m More Than My Scars (Carli Lloyd x Reader)

Anonymous Request: Would you write one where R has some gnarly face scars and the uswnt have been helping her get over here fear of going out because people would treat her bad. Then one day a reporter says something to her and her gf carli completely just shuts them down.

You stared into the locker room’s mirror, tracing the deep scar that ran from the corner of your right eye, across your cheek before cutting across your lips, stopping just at your chin.  

You’d kept your head down in the NWSL, doing everything you could not to draw attention to the ridged scar across your face that you’d gotten in a car accident when you were a teenager.  

Now though...  

Now you were at the national level, and there was absolutely no way you could hide it, from anyone.  

“Hey.”  

You jump at the sound of Mallory’s voice, turning to your NWSL Sky Blue teammate with a smile.  

“Hey.” You murmur, glancing back at the mirror and Mallory frowns, watching as you stare at the scar on your face.  

“Y/N.” Mallory places a hand on your cheek and you turn to her with a small smile that in no way meets your eyes.  

Mallory glances around the locker room, in search of her NWSL teammate and your girlfriend, Carli Lloyd.  

“Carli!” Mallory calls out, the veteran’s eyes locking with Mal’s before she realizes you’re in distress.  

“Is everything okay...?” She asks and you shrug, glancing away again staring at your scarred face.  

“Everyone is going to stare...” You mumble as you trace your scar, tears welling up in your eyes.  

“Y/N, we’re here for you every step of the way.” Carli wraps her arms around you from behind and you nod, leaning back against her.  

“I know...”  

It’s then that the rest of the team notices the tears in your eyes and Kelley is immediately by your side, followed by Sonnett and Alex, the two reaching you at the same time.  

Carli keeps her arms wrapped around you as your teammates surround you in worry, each and every one of them offering comfort.  

“Listen, we’ve all got your back and if anyone says anything about your scar, we’ll take care of it.” Ashlyn nods, and you sniffle, nodding in return.  

“Okay?” The goalie grins and you nod.  

“Okay.”

                                                             ***

“I’ve got you.” Carli whispers in your ear, her arms still wrapped tightly around you.  

Ever since your tears started to fall in the locker room, she’d refused to let you go, even in the tunnel where you and your opponents were gathered, a number of them glancing your way in confusion, not just confusion at the fact Carli Lloyd was closer to you than the jersey on your back, but at the scar running across your face.  

“Alright, stop staring guys.” You smile at Kailen Sheridan’s, your Sky Blue teammate’s, voice, the goal keeper sending you a wink on her way by, reaching over to pat Carli’s back.  

“I’ll keep them off your back.” She smiles and you grin.  

“Thanks Kailen.”  

“Anytime Y/N.”  

Carli still keeps a hold of you, glaring at anyone who so much as glances your way.  

“It’s alright Carli, just me.” Kelley holds her palms up in surrender, waiting for the forward’s nod before she wraps her arms around the both of you.

“It’s not only Carli who’s got your back, we do too.”  

You nod, lips splitting in a grin.  

“I know you do, thanks Kel.”  

The defender ruffles your hair before taking her place back in line.  

You tilt your head back, looking at your girlfriend with a pout, your best puppy dog eyes on display.  

Carli laughs, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips.  

“Come on, let me fix your hair, you know your puppy dog eyes are my weakness.”  

Carli is quick to fix your ruffled hair, kissing the nape of your neck when she finishes.  

The line’s about to head out when she presses a kiss to your cheek.  

“Good luck babe, remember, we’ve got you.”  

Carli jogs to the front of the line and you take a deep breath, nodding.  

“Show time.”  

                                                            ***

No matter how much the team was there for you, or how much they had you, that still didn’t stop the staring, from fans, reporters, staff, everyone was staring and you were painfully aware of it.  

The whistle blows, signaling the end of the first half and almost immediately Carli is at your side, slipping an arm around your middle.  

“You okay?” She asks and you nod, though you can’t help but turn, hiding your face against her sweaty jersey.  

“They keep staring...” You mumble, and Carli pulls you closer, sending a narrowed eyed glare to everyone around you, including your teammates.  

“Heel Lloyd.” Megan smiles as she slips an arm around you, leading you and Carli towards the locker room, your teammates following close behind, glaring at anyone who looks your way.  

“We’ve got you.” Kelley pats your back and you sniffle, nodding, your face still buried in Carli’s shirt.  

Eventually you’re guided back to the locker room, Carli holding you close as the two of you sit down on a bench, your teammates all gathering around you, leaning close to you or touching you in some way.  

Tactic talks were half-hearted, Canada hadn’t been putting up as much of a fight as usual, leaving the team to provide you comfort during the halftime break.  

Carli had been whispering softly in your ear since you’d gotten into her arms, the woman calming you down in a way she didn’t even realize, your teammates caressing your legs, your sides, your back, Christen holding one hand while Alex holds the other.  

“Y/N?”  

You jump, picking your head up for the first time since you’d entered the locker-room.  

“Yeah?” You clear your throat and Vlatko smiles.  

“You okay for the 2nd half?” He asks and you glance around, your teammates staring your way worried.  

You nod.  

“I am.”  

                                                            ***

Thanks to your teammate’s comfort, you’d entered the second half a bit more rejuvenated, tearing up the field and delivering a cross to your girlfriend that ended up in the back of the net, the forward running to you, catching you as you jump into her arms.  

It isn’t until after the game that things change.  

The second the whistle blows Carli makes her way towards you, but she doesn’t have time to get to you before a reporter makes his way over, a cameraman in tow. 

“Excuse me, Y/N? Mind if we get a word?” He asks with a smile and you clear you throat, hating the fact that you’re on camera, but you nod.  

“Now Y/N, you played an amazing game today, but like everyone else, there’s only one question I have and that’s about your sca-

It takes mere moments for Carli to get to you, her eyes narrowed, and nostrils flaring.  

“How dare you...” She snarls, stepping closer to the man. “Y/N had an amazing game, assisted on a goal and all you have to ask her is about her scar? Whoever your employer is, I’d seriously be questioning their judgement on hiring someone like you who doesn’t respect someone and comments on their appearance instead of their talent.”  

The man swallows hard.  

“Ms. Lloyd I’m-

She holds up a hand, scoffing.  

“Save it, you don’t speak to me, or Y/N again.”  

Carli turns to you, with a small, sad frown.  

“I’m sorry Y/N, I tried to get to you in time but I just-

You cut her off with a kiss, your lips pressing tenderly against hers.  

The two of you reluctantly part, grins stretched across both your faces.  

Carli smiles as you cup her cheeks, leaning back in to press another kiss to her lips.  

“I love you.”  

Not only do your eyes double in size, but Carli’s as well considering that was the first time you’d ever told her, I love you.  

The veteran grins, leaning in to press another kiss to your lips.  

“I love you too.”  

You’re about to kiss again when you hear a shout, turning abruptly to see Kelley struggling in Alyssa’s hold, the woman snarling at the reporter from earlier.  

“HOW DARE YOU ASK ME ABOUT HER SCAR!”  

Instead of feeling sadness, you let out a snort, shaking your head as you turn to Carli.  

“We better stop her before she kills him.”  

Carli shrugs.  

“I mean, what’s the rush.” She smirks watching as your other teammates swarm on the reporter, angrily snarling at the shorter man who visibly falters at the site of Ashlyn.  

You slip an arm around her middle, leaning your head on her shoulder.  

“I suppose we could wait a bit longer.”  

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Too Smart for Your Own Good: Part 3

Pairings: Machine Gun Kelly x Reader, (Past and Future) Henry Cavill x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, one night stand, unprotected sex

Word Count: 5,013

A/N: Doesn’t have a completed end yet, but just giving you more content to try to get myself out of a writing funk.

Part 1 / Part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You are receiving a collect call from an inmate at a Los Angeles County Correctional Facility. Would you like to accept these charges?”

“Yes.” You said clearly as you stopped loading your groceries in your blacked out Range Rover to grab your ear bud out of your purse. “Hang on, Daddy. I’m finding my headphone.”

“Take your time.” He said through your car speaker as you dug out the carrier and put the head phone in your ear. You found your phone and switch the bluetooth from your running car to your ear phone and hesitated for a moment.

“You hear me?”

“Crystal fucking clear.” He responded in your ear, which made you nod and drop your phone in the cup holder so it wouldn’t accidentally drop the call in your bag. “Hell are you up to?”

“Grocery store.” You sighed as you went back to your original task. “Was running out of shit at the house to eat. Oh! You will be pleased to know that you are going to be a grandpa, and I think I may have figured out a break in my black hole theory in the pool last night.”

“OK.” Your dad laughed as you walked the cart over to the return. “So I’m a fucking grandparent. Thanks a lot, princess.”

“Any time!” You teased as you got in your cooled down car and buckled your seatbelt.

“You got more on the black whole theory?” He asked, even though he had no idea what you were talking about half the time when you went on one of your ‘space rants’ as he liked to call them.

“Work in progress.” You said with a shrug to spare him the agony of listening to you drone on. “What’s going on in the world of the blue jumpsuits?”

“Fucking parole hearing got bumped up.” The million thoughts that seemed to always run through your brain all simultaneously screeched to a stop, as you stopped behind a car at a red light a few streets from your house.

“You’re coming home?” You whispered as you gripped the steering wheel tight.

“I’m fuckin’ coming home, sweetheart. February 16th. Ten AM.” You nodded your head and continued with the flow of traffic as a couple tears of joy slipped down your cheeks.

“I’ll… I’ll be there.” You choked before clearing your throat. “I’ll be there to get the paperwork through.”

“I’ll need you to get a hold of Simon. I sent you out a letter this morning that’ll need some translating.”

“I’ll keep an eye out for it.” You said as you realized that the car you were following was a familiar purple Lamborghini and it was pulling into your community driveway. “Son of a bitch.”

“What, a fucking letter is inconveniencing you?” He asked sharply, making you shake your head.

“No, fucking sperm donor is back. Hold on.” You stopped your car beside the Lambo and the gate house, rolled down your heavily tinted window and looked at your cousin’s profile and the back of Colson’s shaved head. “Scott! He’s with me, let him in.”

“Run him off the fucking road.” Your father grumbled in your ear as you rolled the window back up and headed through the open side of the gate for home owners.

“In a shiny purple Lambo.” You huffed, jokingly as you hit the button for your driveway gate.

“Fuckin’ really, (Y/N)?! You got knocked up by some puck ass little bitch in a Goddamn purple Lambo?!”

“Shut up.” You grumbled as you drove down the slight hill to your garage and pulled into your spot beside your father’s Harley, his massive Chevy pick-up truck, and a tarp covered Charger that belonged to your ex.

“Goddamn Lambo. Who the fuck are you and what have you done to my fucking daughter?”

“Shut up.” You grumbled again as you got out of the car and pulled open the back door to get your groceries. You startled the slightest bit when a heavily tattooed arm reached in front of you and grabbed your bags before you could even fully open the door. You looked up at Colson as he slowly and carefully moved his body in front of yours, and you rolled your eyes and took a step back with your hands in the air. “So has the prison sent me the paperwork for the hearing?” You asked your dad as you headed toward the door.

“Should have. You’re my lawyer, princess. Check your email when you get a chance. Need me to let you go?”

“No, you’re fine.” You said as you headed past the basement bar and game room to the elevator to take you up to the main floor beside the atrium. “Have you talked to the demon head shrinker cunt yet?” Colson looked at you with his eyebrow raised as he and Ash stepped into the elevator with you, but your cousin simply tapped him on the shoulder, pointed to her ear, and whispered that you were on the phone with your dad.

“Probably won’t have to. Shit’s about over crowding. We’re stuffed three to a fucking cell in some spots. I’m almost at my 80 and I’m the closest parole date. So I’m gettin’ the boot.”

“I’ll take it.” You agreed as you pat the black marble for your bags. “But I am writing a verbally abusive letter for the deplorable conditions they are keeping you in.”

“You do that after I leave this bitch.” He told you as an automated voice let you both know you only had a minute left. “Alright baby girl, I’ll give you a call in a couple days to see if my letter arrived.”

“And I will send you a postcard of your grand blueberry when I go to the doctor on Monday.”

“I will keep my eyes out for it.” He huffed through a smile. “I love you, sweetheart. I’ll be home before you know it.”

“I can’t wait. I love you too, Daddy. Bye.” You waited for him to say good bye and for the click of him hanging up, before you turned off your earbud and looked up at your visitors. “And you’re back in my house because…?”

“OK, we’re not going to start like that.” Ash said quickly as she put her hand on Colson’s arm so he wouldn’t get mad. “We are here to rationally talk like human beings.” You hummed at her and nodded your head as you grabbed some groceries and started putting them away. 

“I brought the family history.” Kels said as he tossed a notebook on the counter beside your bags. “As much as I could figure out from the family I do talk to at least. And some personal shit you should know, too. And I’m having a lawyer draw up a contract…”

“Over my Goddamn dead body!” You roared as you spun on your heel and stormed across the wood floor toward him.

“Wait! Wait!” Ashleigh shouted over you as she stood in front of you and grabbed your wrists before you could start swinging. “It was my idea!”

“And I’ll fucking kill you too.” You threatened as you looked at her with murder in your eyes.

“Look, just breathe, OK? It’s not a custody thing. It’s a contract.”

“Look, I wanna be in my kid’s life.” Colson said over Ash as he stayed firmly parked on the barstool he was sitting in so you would feel less threatened. “And I want my kids to know each other. I wanna make sure you don’t take off and fucking run some day because we obviously can’t fucking stand each other.”

“Wonder who’s fault that is.” You snapped, sarcastically as you pulled out of Ashleigh’s grip to finish putting away your groceries.

“Yea, it’s mine, alright?” He barked. “But I still wanna make sure we both understand that this…” He said as he leaned to purposely catch your eye and gestured between your stomach and himself. “…is our child. And just like with Casie, I will want to spend time with our child on holidays and when I’m in town and not working. And I don’t want to turn around one day to find out that you packed up and moved to fucking Paris or some shit.”

“Paris is a trash covered wasteland.” You retorted under your breath as you folded all of your grocery bags and put them on the end of your counter to put back in your car later. “Probably go to Belfast… maybe Scotland...

“OK, she’s not going to run.” Ashleigh said quickly before Colson could start yelling. “But this is what the contract is going to be for. So what both of you want from the other is set in stone.”

“Yea, well I don’t want shit from him.”

“Then you should get an abortion now, bitch!” Colson roared as he finally jumped to his feet. “Because you made this fucking choice to keep my kid so you’re fucking stuck with me…”

“You better remember who the fuck you are talking to.” You said evenly as you pulled one of your fathers many hand guns out of one of the kitchen drawers. You laid it down on the counter between you with your finger outstretched along the slide where you could quickly pull the trigger if you needed to. Kels stood his ground, but Ashleigh took a few steps back away from you to be on the safe side.

“OK.” She nearly whispered as her hands started to shake at her sides. “(Y/N), let’s put that away…”

“Now it’s time for you to listen, bitch.” You started as you searched his rage filled blue eyes. “You want a contract? Fine. We can spend the next nine months and then some fine tuning a contract to your hearts content. But know this, if you think you’re in charge here, you’re not. You will run by my fucking rules, like it or not. Because if I wanted to disappear, I assure you, not even a private investigator could find me.” The pair of you stood in a stand off for a few moments, waiting for the other one to crack.

“I need a fax number.” He finally said, forfeiting the power to you. You nodded your head as you put your gun back and pulled the notebook toward you. You wrote down your email, your cell, and fax number, and ripped the page out for him.

“Appointment next Monday for the first ultrasound is at 11:15 AM. Be here at 10:30 if you want to go with me. I’ll call down to the gate and tell them you’re coming.” He nodded his head as he folded up the paper and stuck it in his pocket to pass on to his lawyer, while you gestured to the atrium to your left. “You can see yourselves out now.” You looked over at your cousin as Kels simply turned to leave and shook your head. “If you ever, ever pull a stunt like that again, I will disown you.”

“I’m sorry.” She whispered as she finally stepped back over to you. “I just knew you wouldn’t take it very well, and he didn’t give me time to call…”

“You have one warning.” You told her as you kissed her cheek. “And don’t step between Colson and I. Obviously, it’s gunna be a shit show.”

“Well, he’s my boss, so I can’t let you kill him.” You rolled your eyes and shook your head as you gave her a push toward the door.

“Just wait until he meets Negan!” You called out after her with a giant smile. “He’s coming home in a few weeks!” Your cousin came to a dead stop in the atrium and turned around to look at the giant shit eating grin you had on your face.

“Shut up.”

“Hell is about to rain down on LA again!” You laughed as you grabbed the bags off the counter, and turned to head down stairs to put them back in your car. 

——

“You know, I was having a really peaceful morning.” You bitched as you stood at the top of the side stairs the next day and watched Colson get out of his car. “And then here you are.”

“Not fucking fighting.” He said more to himself as he came over and stopped in front of you. He said nothing else, leaving the ball in your court as he put his hands in the pockets of his jeans and waited. You huffed and turned on your heel to head back to your beach chair. 

“Am I going to see you every day for the rest of eternity?” You inquired as you pushed your sunglasses back down your face.

“Until we can get past this bullshit, yea.” You stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned back to look at him as he simply toed off his sneakers. “Casie’s mom and I used to fight all the fucking time.” He started as he pulled off his socks and rolled up his jeans. “But we talked it out. No matter how much we hated each other at the end. We talked, and we fought, and we screamed, and she even got a good kidney shot in once when she pushed me back into a counter. But we got through our shit for our daughter.” He stood up and looked at you with a shrug. “So we’re gunna fight it out. No contract, because that’s kind of a bullshit way to co-parent and we got like nine fucking months. So we’re gunna fucking talk.” You nodded your head slightly and gestured up the steps.

“There’s another beach chair up against the garden wall. And that bedroom has some spare bathing suits in the top dresser drawer and towels in the second. They all have tags and there are a bunch of different sizes.” You shrugged and gestured over your shoulder at your chair. “Sunscreen…” With an internal groan, you turned around and walked away to continue to get some sun. You tossed your phone back in the back pocket of your chair and sat down gently as another wave gently crashed across your lap. “Fucking sunscreen…” You grumbled as you shook your head.

“Alright so we start from the beginning.” Kels said as he set up his chair right next to yours a few minutes later. “How far along are you?”

“Six weeks, two days.” He nodded his head and stretched his legs out as another wave washed up on the shore.

“And we’re keeping it?”

“Despite the fact that we hate each other? Yes.” His head continued to nod as he chose to ignore your annoyance.

“I grew up in Cleveland.” He started as he reached over and grabbed the sunscreen from your cupholder. “For the most part. Lived in Denver for a while, traveled a lot with my dad before that. My mom left for another man when I was nine. She hated my dad that much…” You turned your head to look at him as he covered his tattooed torso with sun block. “I won’t do that to my kids.”

“Born and raised here in LA.” You said in the moment of silence after his declaration. “Mom died during child birth. I was a breech baby and she lost to much blood in an emergency C. I remember her face.” You breathed as you looked down at your lap and connected the drops of water on your thigh before the next wave came in. “I have her eyes. And I remember the light leaving hers as my dad held me in place on her chest.”

“(Y/N)…”

“I don’t wanna keep you from our kid.” You interrupted quickly as you rested your head back against the chair pillow and looked out at the ocean. “I grew up with one parent, and while my dad managed to go above and beyond with me, it was hard on him and me without my mother. I don’t want to do that to my child.”

“So part one of the verbal contract.” He said as he put your sunblock back and settled back in his chair. “No matter what, this child will grow up for the rest of his or her life with both of us in it. Even if we hate each other, and we have to go through a third party like Ashleigh for pick ups and drop offs, we will not keep him or her away from each other.”

“No poisoning him or her.” You said as you grabbed one of the water bottles from your cooler and handed it over to him. “Meaning you don’t trash talk me in front of him and vice versa.”

“Agreed. OK, here’s one my ex and I had issues with. We make decisions together.”

“You and I are going to have to work on that.” You giggled as you finally looked over at him. “Because we’re not very good at that right now.”

“But we will work on it so we can make decisions together.” He repeated as he met your eyes with a small nod. “Agreed?”

“Agreed.” You said with a nod. “I like to travel. I haven’t in a long time because… well… that’s a long story… But I want to start traveling again. And I know you already travel a lot for work. And even though you taking him or her alone is a long way off due to breast feeding and the fact that you kinda live a wild life, I’d like the record to show that should we leave Los Angeles county with our child, we have to let the other person know the intended itinerary.”

“I can absolutely get behind that.” He agreed. “And after he or she is born, I’d like to bring… well both of you to Cleveland so Casie can meet her brother or sister… and so that you can meet Emma, my ex, since y’all have something in common now.” You nodded your head and glanced out at the horizon as you chose your words wisely.

“I’m… um…” You started, before clearing your throat. “Well, technically, I’m engaged.”

“You…” He said harshly, which made you sit forward and hide your face in your hands.

“Look, it’s fucking complicated.” You said as you sat back and looked over at him. “Henry and I were together for years. We got engaged six years ago and he left to join the Army shortly after that. And I haven’t heard from him since. So technically, I am engaged. But my fiancé is gone. And he’s never coming back and I just can’t accept that yet, apparently because... well I just can’t.”

“Jesus.” He breathed as he sat back in his chair. “No wonder you’re such a bitch toward men.”

“No, that’s just you.” You responded as you unscrewed the cap of your water and took a sip.

“And we were making progress, too.”

“What’s next on your list, Kels?” You asked with a laugh as you kicked water in his direction.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next four weeks went by at an almost glacial pace, but at the same time, before you knew it, you were walking though the halls toward the prison’s office, with a stack of paperwork from the parole board in your hand and a giant smile on your face that you didn’t think would ever go away. You had made this walk so many times before, but this was the only time you were actually hopeful. And hopeful wasn’t even the right word. 

“Damn it.” Michael Bishop, who ran the prisons office, grumbled as you walked through the door. “What?”

“Parole board kicked him.” You said with a smile as you rested your arms on the counter and held out the paperwork toward him. “Let him out.”

“Let who out?” A woman you didn’t recognize asked as Mike got up and came over to start the paperwork.

“Negan.” He sighed as he pulled his glasses from his pocket. “They finally let him out, huh?”

“And I didn’t even have to file another petition to get it done.” You teased with a smile.

“OK, well I’ll get these papers started as soon…” The woman started as she stood up from her chair but Mike quickly held them out of her reach before you could even form a reply.

“I got it.” He said as he shot you a nervous smile because he knew the temper you had inherited from your father when it came to his time behind bars. “Putting them through right now.”

“I’ll wait.” You said with a nod as you pulled your phone out of your bag. “How’s the wife?”

“Still kicking my ass.” He muttered as he sat down at his computer. “How’s life treatin’ ya since last time?”

“It’s a revolving door.” You sighed as you pulled up your texts to finally give Simon the go ahead to bring Negan’s Harley down to the prison. “That is finally opening the correct way.”

“Should keep spinning.” The woman muttered under her breath, which made both you and Mike freeze. 

“I’m sorry. Do you have something you wanna fucking say there, sunshine?”

“No! No she didn’t!” Mike tried as you set your phone face down on the counter.

“No, she has the right to speak.” You said with a smile as you folded your hands together on the counter. Mike looked away and scrambled into overdrive to process Negan’s release for you. “What, you don’t like the fact that my father’s joining the real world again? Don’t think that living the last ten years of my life without the only family I have wasn’t enough? What, you don’t think…”

“No, she didn’t!” Mike said quickly as he jumped up and grabbed Negan’s paperwork off his desk and the printer. “Look, he’s good to go. Get him to his parole officer today, OK?” You nodded your head and took the stack of papers out of his hand with a small smile.

“Thanks, Mike. And you can go fuck yourself, bitch.” The officer shouted ‘excuse me’ as you grabbed your phone and turned on your heel to leave the prison for the last time. The roar of motorcycles greeted you as you stepped out the door, and you stopped beside Simon to wait for your father.

“Congrats on the baby, kiddo.” He said as he made sure your father’s bike was stable so that you could lean against it. “When are you due?”

“September 13th.” You sighed as you sat down on the seat and grabbed your sneakers from your bag. “A Friday of all things.”

“Wouldn’t be your kid if it wasn’t.” He huffed.

“More to the story of my life.” You sighed as you dropped your heels in your bag and slung the strap over your shoulder.

“Heard baby daddy is a rock star…”

“Shut up, Simon.” You sighed as you crossed your arms over your chest to wait. It was thankfully only about a half hour wait before the prison door opened and your father walked free. Despite the cheers from the rest of the club, he walked straight over to you.

“Hi Daddy.” You whispered as he lifted you up off the ground in a hug.

“Hi princess. Thank you.” You smile at him as he set you down and nodded his head. “Thank you for getting me outta there.”

“Of course, Daddy.”

“So where we doing lunch?” He asked as he took his kutte from Simon and put it on.

“Boss, we…” The VP tried, but your father shot him the look to end all looks.

“I’m talking… to my daughter.” The VP nodded and took a step back as Negan looked back at you with a smile. “Lunch, sweetheart? Gotta feed the grand baby…”

“Umm… honestly? Right now, I really want a milkshake…”

“Johnny Rockets?” He asked with a smirk. You nodded your head as he held out his hand and snapped his fingers for a helmet. Your smile grew as you tilted your head up and let him close the buckle so he could take care of you like he wished he could have for the past ten years, even if you didn’t need him to. “Let’s go, boys!” You honestly hadn’t realized how much you missed the wind in your hair, but you felt free and more safe than you had in a long while. The thought crossed your mind that it was the first time in six years that you felt completely safe again, but also that Colson had somehow made you start to feel safe with his daily visits to check on you and your child. You were so lost in that idea, that you missed your father parking next to a purple Lamborghini until it was to late.

“Look familiar, princess?”

“Daddy, let’s go.” You said with a shake of your head as your eyes darted toward the restaurant to find the father of your child. “I don’t feel good, let’s go, please…”

“Nope.” He said as he took off your helmet and dropped it on the seat beside his. “I’m fucking starving and a burger is just what I fucking want.”

“Daddy, please. Don’t do this… Damn it…” You quickly tried to get in front of your father and the rest of the club without your small bump being bumped, but you were unsuccessful.

“Colson fucking Baker!” Your father announced, as if he had just won a prize. “Where the fuck are you?”

“Dad, stop it!” You hissed as you were finally able to push in front of him in the thankfully empty restaurant. You looked at Colson’s slightly stunned, slightly shocked, and mostly confused face, and shook your head to hopefully tell him to run… which he didn’t.

“So you’re the prick that knocked up my daughter?” Negan huffed as he sized up your six foot four baby daddy when he stood up from the booth in the corner, where he had apparently just sat down for an early lunch with some woman you didn’t know. You saw her face flush red with embarrassment and rage, and the two of you locked eyes for a moment before you both looked away from different reasons. “Sit down.”

“No, Colson, go back to your lunch.” You tried as you pushed your father toward an open booth on your left. “Daddy, stop, please.”

“Sit the fuck down!” Negan roared when Kels took a step back toward his date. Colson quickly took a seat and you jumped in front of your dad to sit down next to him. You whispered an apology to him as his date got up and walked out angrily, but he simply shook his head and pat your thigh reassuringly.

“Sir, it’s very nice…”

“What kinda fuckin’ shake does my grand child want?” Negan interrupted as he grabbed two menus and handed you one as the rest of the club filed into the booths around you. You sighed loudly and pushed his menu flat on the table with a shake of your head.

“I’m not playing this game. You did it to Henry, you won’t do it to him.” Your father looked up at you with his eyebrow raised and you quickly reach out and squeezed Colson’s wrist before he could interject in the silence. “He’s a human being, and you just cost him his lunch date. So you are going to ask him your questions, and let him go so he can fix the mess you made.” Negan stared at you silently as all the other Saviors went out of their way to avoid looking in even the general vicinity of your booth, waiting to see who was going to win this show down. After a full minute, Negan grabbed a third menu and handed it to Colson without taking his eyes off you.

“What kinda shake does my grand baby want?” Negan asked again as he finally looked away to find your waitress. You visibly relaxed and looked over at your friend with an apologetic look.

“She was boring as fuck anyways.” He muttered under his breath as he bumped your shoulder and looked at the menu. “I think their chocolate is the best…”

“I want them all.” You sighed as your stomach growled loudly. “Baby wants them all.”

“Then baby can have them all.” Negan said as he casually crossed his legs and settled back into the booth a bit more. “And baby better have a great fucking life, with a present father, right?”

“It will.” Colson said with a nod. “And he or she will have a sister, too. One that I’ve managed to keep alive for ten years.”

“Her mother has primary custody?”

“She does.” He confirmed as your dad perused the menu he knew like the back of his hand as if it was the most interesting thing in the whole world.

“So will my daughter.” Negan stated, simply.

“Dad, I swear to God.” You growled as you covered your face with your hands.

“It’s fine.” Colson said as he rubbed your back. “She’d probably do better with primary custody over me any day of the week. I’m on the road to much.”

“And that’s the kinda life you wanna give your child?” Negan asked as he finally looked over at you.

“Because I didn’t have an amazing life with you going out of town all the time?” You asked, honestly. “Because my childhood was so horrible being raised club house to club house, country to country?” He sat silently as you set your menu down and covered your bump with your hand. “Daddy, I had an amazing life. And my child will have an amazing life as well. He or she will travel same as we did. How is this situation any different than ours, other than the missing kutte?”

“Well I still don’t have to fucking like it.” He said stubbornly as he looked back down at the menu. “And I don’t fucking like him. Where is the Goddamn waitress around here?!”

Part 4

[heroineimages]

Designing a sewer

Hoping to modernize her neglected home city-state, one of the projects Queen Viarra commissions is a sewer system to keep the city cleaner. One of the useful things about having a father who’s on the board of directors for the local irrigation district and a brother with a degree in soil-and-water engineering is that I know enough tidbits about the science and engineering behind waterways to sound semi-knowledgeable on the topic. In the following excerpt, Viarra’s steward, Ronnius, talks engineering concerns with Oppen, the project lead.

“The understanding I got from Queen Viarra is that Kel Fimmaril doesn’t have a river nearby and has several wells dug to supply the drinking water,” Oppen explained. “The only sources of running water on the island are the various freshwater springs in the higher elevations in the north half of the island.”

“Correct,” Ronnius nodded. “There’s a draw nearby that drains runoff from the mountain, but the only time of year it runs regularly is during the winter rains. And from what I understand, a proper sewer needs a constant stream of water year-round to keep it flushed out?”

“Yes,” Oppen assured him as they walked back toward the city gates. “How close are the nearest springs?”

“The closest two are hot springs about two-and-a-half and almost three miles away and have bathhouses built over them,” Ronnius explained.

“I’ve had to dig farther,” Oppen admitted. “Alright, before we can even consider building a sewer system, we need to confirm if we can even get flowing water to the city. Tomorrow could you have someone take me and some of my surveyors to those sites? Since this is for sewers instead of drinking water, it shouldn’t matter that its hot bathwater.”

“Good to know,” Ronnius nodded.

“I also want to take a look at this draw to determine if we can use it to transport our spring water at least part of the way. How much water does the draw transport in a given winter?” Oppen asked. “The last thing we need is the damned thing flooding when the rain water rushes in on top of our spring water.”

“I’ll have to ask around,” Ronnius admitted. “I’m not aware that anyone has ever tried to measure that. Shit, there’s a lot more to take into consideration than I’d ever imagined.”

Oppen chuckled. “Young man, you have no idea.”

[thinkyoureholy]

Fragile Figures [20]

[ this one a roller coaster with Y/N’s inner monologue.]

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Pairing : Choi San / [Fem] Reader

Genre : Angst, Violence, Language, Fluff, Smut, Character Death?, Mafia! AU

Words : 3.4k

Previous Chapter. - Next Chapter.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

-Yunho’s P.O.V-

I cursed under my breath, looking around for a way out but all the exits were blocked and the only way back is the way we came but I could already hear the sound of footsteps coming from downstairs. I can’t believe they were waiting for us the whole time. So those on the first floor when we first arrived were decoys, huh? I’d expect nothing else from Choi Mei and her siblings. And just our luck, we had to deal with the worst of the three, Kei. 

Both Seonghwa and I moved forward, pushing Y/N behind us. If we were up against anyone else there would be no need to protect her but against Kei? I'd protect the whole damn city against him if I had to. Kei was the sickest bastard we've ever had the displeasure of knowing. We'd hear all kinds of things about him through the grapevine. This asshole loved to torture his victims, and we're no saints but this guy, he was the devil incarnate. Just the sight of the malicious grin that always seemed to adorn his face sent a chill down the length of my spine.

“Luna, Kel, and Hiro, go.” Kei called out to the people around him, the three moving forward.

I scanned the three of them, trying to figure out what the best course of action would be to handle them. They didn’t look weak but they didn’t seem particularly strong either, one of us should be able to handle all three of them. And what better person to take on the task than our best fighter? I turned to Seonghwa and gave him a nod. He rolled his shoulders back, cracking his neck as he discarded his jacket. He took a step towards them, Y/N trying to take one after him but I stopped her, holding onto her arm tightly.

“It’s three against one, Yunho. You can’t expect him to fight all of them at once.” She argued, her other hand grabbing onto my wrist, trying to get me to let go but I refused to do so.

I shook my head, pulling her back, “He’s more than capable of handling them on his own. I know you want to help but we have more pressing matters to attend to don’t you think?”

I looked around, urging her to do the same. The other five people that Kei had brought out began to surround us, each one armed with a knife. I looked over their heads, past the brawl Seonghwa was now a part of at Kei who was standing at the end of the corridor, his gloved hands stuffed into his pockets as he leaned against the wall, watching everything unfold with a smirk on his face. Y/N must’ve seen the smirk as well, taking off towards him before I could stop her. My grip on her arm only loosened for a second but that was all she needed. I cursed under my breath as I ran after her but I was cut off, barely managing to dodge a punch that was thrown my way.

“Y/N!” I called out, desperately trying to fight my way over to her, “Stop! You can’t beat him, not like this?! Don’t let your emotions cloud your judgement!”

I tried to get through to her but she just kept getting farther and farther away from me. My heart rate skyrocketed, panic started to flood my system. I have to get to her! I have to get her as far away from Kei as possible, she’s no match for him with how she is right now! Every time she lets her emotions get the better of her she gets hurt and I know for a fact Kei won’t stop at just hurting her, no, he’ll kill her. I can’t let that happen but she’s too far away for me to reach! 

“Y/N!” I cried out as I sucker punched the man that was trying to block me from going after her.

-Y/N’s P.O.V-

I pushed aside everyone that got in my way. It only took a few seconds for me to get to Kei and when I did neither of us moved a muscle. I just stared at him with all the hatred I could muster and all he did was give me a smirk. The smug look on his face was enough to make me snap as I ran at him. He easily avoided me, sidestepping to his left but I didn’t keep running like he thought I would. I dug my heels into the floor and pivoted on my right foot, swinging out to hit him but he was just as quick. He had turned just in time to catch my fist with his hand, his fingers closing around my fist in a tight grip. I cursed under my breath as I tried to push forward, wanting to overpower him but he was trying to do the same. Both of our arms began to shake the longer we kept this up.

“I see you’re as worthy of an opponent as ever. I thought spending that time with my dear little brother would’ve made you go soft but no, you’ve actually gotten stronger,” He said with a low chuckle, his bright golden colored eyes shining with malice, “But it’s still not enough.”

With a devilish grin on his face he seemed to grow stronger as he pushed back. No, it's not that he got stronger all of a sudden, he’d been holding back this whole time. I winced as he continued to push forward, the strain on my arm starting to get painful the longer this went on. I set my jaw, trying to hold on but I couldn’t, not anymore. With a curse I pulled my fist out of his grip, stumbling back a bit. 

“Oh come on, why’d you give up so quickly? I was just starting to have fun.” He teased, a condescending smile on his face.

I winced as I flexed my fingers but grinned through the pain, “I need to have a little fun too, don’t you think? I can’t have you breaking any of my bones just yet.”

The smile on his face turned sinister, a laugh falling from his lips. His eyes took on a gleam I had never seen before and if I was being honest, it was the most terrifying look I had ever seen. I moved so I was facing the hallway, my back to the window. I snuck a glance past Kei, watching Yunho and Seonghwa fight off the people Kei had with him. Yunho tried to fight them off to get to me but every time he took one down another took their place. I looked passed them to see the other three fighting with Kiri, a few others I hadn’t seen before in the mix. Jongho seemed sloppy as he fought Kiri, his punches not landing as he used way too much force, stumbling forward at the motion. I knew he was capable of taking Kiri down with his eyes closed but from the moment Hongjoong died he had let his emotions take control.  

“Eyes on me, love.” Kei said in a low voice, drawing me out of my thoughts.

I barely had enough time to block his first with my arm, a hiss of pain leaving my lips. The grin never fell from his lips as he delivered blow after blow, it took everything I had to block his punches. I couldn’t even get a punch in myself with how hard he was coming at me. I had to take several steps back, the window inches from me. And that’s when I finally had a good idea. 

When he went to deliver another blow I didn’t just block it, I grabbed onto his arm and turned us around so his back was facing the window now. I let him go and kicked at his stomach, his back hitting the window but it wasn’t enough to break the glass. I took a few steps back, thinking this over as I bounced on the balls of my feet for a few seconds. I stole a glance over my shoulder, my eyes immediately finding Yunho’s. My gaze softened the instant they found his. His eyes went wide when he saw the look I gave him, already knowing what I was thinking of doing. I drowned out his cries, taking a deep breath before turning my attention back to Kei who had taken a step towards me. We were on the second floor, the fall shouldn’t hurt too much. If Kei landed on his back like I hoped he would then a few bones would fracture and the air would leave his lungs but that wouldn’t be enough to kill him. If I let go of him the moment the glass broke and we started falling I’d have a fraction of a second to try and reposition myself so I’d land on my feet, the worst injury I could get was a broken ankle and that’s if I land wrong and there’s a high possibility of that happening. The more I thought about it the more the cons of it seemed to scare me but if I didn’t do this I wouldn’t be able to beat him. 

With one last deep breath I ran at Kei. He set his jaw, ready for whatever I was about to do. Just as I reached him I had one last idea pop into my head and this one had the highest possibility of success. I hooked my left arm around his waist and pushed, hearing the glass of the window shatter. Just as we were about to fall I reached out and grabbed the windowsill with my right hand. I didn’t think it would work but I was pleasantly surprised when I found that I had a strong grip on the windowsill. What I didn’t account for was Kei holding on to my left arm, causing me to cry out at the extra weight.

“You fucking bitch. Did you really think that would work?” He snapped out, his grip on my arm getting tighter and tighter by the second. 

I tried to shake him off but that only made the strain on my right arm worse. I could barely hold myself up with one arm but with the extra weight it was difficult to say the least. If I didn’t get him to let go I knew my shoulder would dislocate. He must’ve had the same idea as he pulled on my arm and just like that there was a pop from my shoulder. I let out a shrill cry of pain as I was forced to let go of the windowsill, the both of us falling once more. Kei’s position and height gave him an advantage as he landed without injury but I wasn’t so lucky. One of my feet touched the ground before the other and the moment I felt that it was over. I heard a sickening crunch coming from my right ankle. I collapsed seconds later, clenching my teeth at the pain in my shoulder and now my ankle.

“I’ll give you props for the idea. It was good, stupid, but good.” Kei said as he stood over me.

He rolled his shoulders just as he crouched down in front of me. He reached out to brush his fingers against my cheek. I pulled back in disgust, glaring at him as he just smiled. His smile soon turned into a frown as he reached forward once again, his hand clutching onto the collar of my shirt instead. His eyes turned deadly the second he pulled me towards him.

“I’m done playing now.” He growled out.

And just like that it seemed like a dark shadow was cast over his face, his eyes resembling that of a beast that had been pushed to their limit. Without hesitating he finally delivered a blow to my face. My left arm was sore from holding him and his weight up and my right was useless so I wasn’t able to block his attacks like before. As he delivered blow after blow I couldn’t help but let my mind wander back to all the bad decisions I had made. If I had to pick the worst one of all it’d have to be the one where I decided to be a criminal. Had I chosen a different route in life then none of this shit would be happening in the first place.

But it was your only way out.

Was it? Was it really the only way to get out of my miserable situation? I’ve hurt so many people and got hurt countless more times. Was it all worth it?

So their deaths were meaningless?

No! But if I had never met them in the first place they wouldn’t have died. All I’ve done is cause misfortune. Day in and day out all I do is hurt people. Because of me Hongjoong is dead! Because of me Jae died and Seonghwa has those horrible scars covering his entire arm! Because of me they’re all risking their lives! And for what?! For someone that might not be alive anymore!

I froze the second that thought crossed my mind. The entire time I had been wondering if he was still alive but I always had hope, I had never given up. The thought of San being dead had been chased out of my mind the moment it showed itself. But tonight I finally let that thought come to life. Hearing it in my own words had tears gather in my eyes, the words painful even if they weren’t spoken out loud.

“Ah, I take back what I said about you being a worthy opponent. I guess when the odds aren’t in your favor you’re not as good as you look,” Kei paused for a moment, his hand landing on the top of my head as he combed his fingers through my hair before he pulled at the roots, “ C’mon now, love. Where’s that sharp tongue of yours? Don’t tell me you’ve given up already.”

He pulled my head up roughly, forcing me to be eye level with him. I could see my appearance reflected in his eyes, the sight was a perfect example of how I felt. My whole face was covered in blood, you could hardly see the skin underneath it all. I could feel a burning sensation on my bottom lip, the feeling letting me know that I had a busted lip. And my left eye? The difficulty I had keeping it open was enough to know that he had given me a black eye. And through the reflection I could see a cut in my brow which explained the blood I felt trickling down and over my right eye. He had left me more beaten that I had ever been at one given time. This is the Kei I knew; ruthless and without mercy, a man with little morals and with a great need to draw blood from anyone and anything that crossed his path. 

“Mei might be a little annoyed with the state I have you in.” He said with a sigh, using his sleeve to roughly wipe some of the blood off my face, “She did say to bring you back alive and presentable. I’m sure San won’t be too happy about seeing you like this.”

My heart leapt in my chest at the mention of him. I searched Kei’s eyes desperately, trying to see if they held any kind of deception but I found none. Kei was anything but a liar, his honesty is what made him so dangerous. But if what he’s saying is true...then—then I could see him again. Will I finally be able to see San after weeks of being apart? Just the thought of seeing him with my own eyes had a lump forming in my throat. Kei must’ve noticed the change in my eyes as an amused smile made its way onto his face.

“Oh? Has that fighting spirit of yours returned, love? Was that all you needed to get you back on your feet? I can’t believe just the mention of that brat still being alive has brought that fire back into your eyes.” Kei spat, the smile still on his face but the disgust in his eyes was clear.

I set my jaw, clenching my hands into fists. Without giving it a second thought I swung my head forward. My forehead connected with his nose, making him fall back onto his ass. I leaned back and kicked at his chest with my left foot. He fell back with a thud, gasping for air. I only had a few seconds. I had to put some distance between us and I have to do it now. Gritting my teeth and baring through the pain I pushed myself up onto my feet. My right leg cried out for me to not put any pressure on it but I won’t be able to go fast enough if I hope on one foot. 

Just for now. I just need a few seconds, please. It’s all I need.

I begged my body, pushing it to its limit but I needed to go further than my limit. I won’t ever give up like I just did before. Never again. I’ll keep fighting until I no longer have any life left in me. With that last mental push I was able to push myself physically and get some space between Kei and I. I winced as I lifted my right leg off the ground, leaning back against a tree. I was panting heavily as I watched him get up into a sitting position. 

He let out a heavy sigh before he stood up, shaking his head slightly. He had a frown on his face as he turned to face me, a hand going to the back of his head as he ruffled his own hair, his eyes closing for a moment. I watched him carefully, raising my right arm as I did so and reached behind my head to my opposite shoulder. The second I heard my shoulder pop back into place I let out a relieved sigh as the pain faded. My relief was short lived as I heard him chuckle softly to himself. His chuckle soon turned into a full body laugh, his shoulders shaking as he doubled over, clutching his stomach with one hand. The sound of his laughter sent a chill down the length of my spine, a sense of dread washing over me.

“Ah…” He let out in a single breath, straightening back out. 

He had a wicked smile on his face but it was partially covered as he covered a single eye with his fingers. That look in his eyes returned, the one I had seen back inside. The look was enough to send my heart into overdrive, the fear wanting to seep into my system but I forced it away. I can’t waver, not again.

“I’m starting to feel excited. What to do, love? When I get like this I can’t seem to stop myself later. I might just really kill you this time.” He let out, his voice eerily calm, the madness clear in his gaze.

I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat as I brought my hands up to fight, waiting for him to make the first move. 

“Come one then. I’ll kill you myself you sick bastard.” I snarled out, watching his eyes shine brighter than I’d ever seen before.

San...I’ll see you soon. Just hold on a little longer.

-San’s P.O.V-

I arched my back off of the table, squirming as another cry fell on deaf ears. At this point I don’t even know if she’s still ignoring me or if my throat is just that sore from screaming that I physically can’t make anymore sound. The pain was unbearable. I can’t take it anymore. Anything--Anything would be better than this. Even death, yes...death...please I just end it all.

“Please…” I whimpered, my voice hoarse.

Mei stopped at the sound of my voice. She came over to stand next to my head, his face hovering over me, “Hmm?”

“Please. Just--Just kill me already. I...can’t take...it anymore. Please.” I begged her, tears falling down the sides of my face.

She didn’t say anything for a moment, his eyes scanning over my face before she looked back into my eyes. Her lips spread into a smile that looked identical to Kei’s and like with Kei the sight of it sent fear coursing through my veins.

“Oh Sannie...I’m just getting started.”

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Tags : @choisofty @woosanville

[radramblog]

Midnight Hunt Commanders (and Midnight Hunt Commander)

Another month, another new set release. This time: Innistrad 3 Part 1, Midsommar edition. I’m sure you’ve read all the jokes at this point.

Still, though, I like running through cards like this. I’ve heard some podcasters and other content creators lament the accelerating release pace because it means you only get to do so much “normal” content between set review stuff. But I like set review stuff! One of the handful of upsides of the hypercapitalist nightmare that is WoTC under Hasbro.

Anyway here’s some spooky things you can put in charge of a scary deck.

Adeline, Resplendent Cathar

While being strictly inferior to Adeline from Kirby, this card is a surprisingly aggressive beater. She’s going to be attacking for 4 commander damage on turn 4, and that’s assuming no ramp or other creatures on the board. Sure, those tokens are probably going to bite it, but that’s something you can take advantage of! Also, curving her into Cathar’s Crusade is both flavourful and also terrifying. White Token Aggro is far from a new concept, but Adeline is quite the efficient example of the trope.

 Lier, Disciple of the Drowned

I cannot imagine that many people playing this as the commander. The number one thing you’re going to want to flashback in mono-blue is counterspells, which this card turns off. Sure, there’s some funky things you can do with slow blink effects, but that’s a lot of work for an extra Cancel. With that said, this is going to be in the 99 of so many decks, so I wouldn’t feel bad for Lier.

 Gisa, Glorious Ressurector

I guess we’re seeing Geralf in the next set? Gisa is super cool- I’m not huge on just having a hate piece in the command zone, but Gisa justifies it by giving you a bunch of value. I’m not sure how I feel about Decayed as a mechanic, but flavour-wise it works really well, and considering how much you can get out of an ETB or just one attack in this format, she’s probably not complaining. I think you really need a haste effect to get the most out of her, though. But she’s cool as heck, another sick card for everybody’s favourite small zombie goth GF.

 Gorex, the Tombshell

Gorex is interesting, as a pseudo-delve threat that slowly regains the value you put into it, and it is also a giant zombie turtle. On the other hand, it’s not especially interesting. I feel like a lot of these “lieutenant” creatures are really hit or miss, and I’m afraid to say I think this one’s the latter. You can’t even play it with Meandering Towershell!

 Jadar, Ghoulcaller of Nephalia

This just kinda feels like a waste of a legendary slot. It’s somewhere between Ophiomancer and Dreadhorde Invasion, but significantly worse than both, and you want to put this in the zone? It’s kind of disappointing, especially considering this dude has been on flavour text since the original Innistrad block. Which was 10 years ago.

 Jerren, Corrupted Bishop / Ormendahl, the Corrupter

As much as I love Westvale Abbey, the condition to flip Jerren is so utterly specific that I’m not going to bother considering it, so we kind of just have to ignore Ormendahl, powerful as he is. And Jerren isn’t much to write home about either. He wants to be in charge of a Humans deck, clearly, but there’s not really much to support that at all. Like, Xathrid Necromancer and Village Cannibals I guess? Probably taking the pass on this one.

Man there were 4 whole Mono-Black commanders in this one and like one of them is interesting. Gisa’s carrying the colour on her back this time around.

 Kurbis, Harvest Celebrant

Kurbis is…eh. The thing with your big +1/+1 counter threats is that damage isn’t usually the thing taking them out, so they’d work better in a deck that tries to distribute the counters more evenly. But then, in order to get much from Kurbis, you’re going to need to shrink them a lot…I honestly can’t see playing this in either maindeck or command zone. It just doesn’t do enough. I do like the “counters equal to mana spent” text on cards like this, at least.

 Saryth, the Viper’s Fang

Another 99er. Lot of those this time. Saryth is a great if somewhat awkward way to both abuse and protect things like Circle of Dreams Druid or Faeburrow Elder, or just as another Thousand-Year Elixir for commanders that like tap abilities. But I cannot imagine building this as a commander.

By the way, we’re done with all of the monocoloured commanders. And only 1/3rd of the way through all the cards. I know multicolour is more popular, but this set is kind of dire for those types of decks.

 Dennick, Pious Apprentice / Dennick, Pious Apparition

This feels a lot like a fixed Temmet (since the back half gets to deal commander damage) but with a different flavour. He is a card you can get a lot of value from for fairly cheap, seeing as you only pay the tax half the times you’re casting him, and the abilities on both sides are solid enough. I’m not inspired by this commander in basically any way, but he’s pretty much decent on either side and with how cheap he is you could kinda just build the deck however. Sure?

 Eloise, Nephalia Sleuth

Finally, a commander for the 6 Surveil Matters cards that were in GRN, which admittedly is more than I was expecting. Eloise is both a solid value engine for sacrifice-y decks that only really have had one Dimir commander in the past (that being Kels), and the trigger on the second ability is surprisingly flexible- it’s clearly meant to work with the Clue tokens she makes and the Decayed tokens from the precon, but it works great with Eldrazi Spawn, Treasures, and any other token creatures you’re deciding to churn through for value. The consistency and efficiency this adds to these kinds of decks is super sweet, and I’ve just checked EDHREC and literally nobody has built her. That is shocking to me, frankly, but I’m sure that’ll change.

 Ludevic, Necrogenius / Olag, Ludevic’s Hubris

I heard y’all wanted a new Ludevic since the old one’s terrible? Fuck you he’s dead now. Ludevic’s front face is extremely uninspired, but the real commander is on the back side- he does at least enable the strategy. Olag is, unfortunately, kind of just a worse Mimeoplasm, something I have a lot of experience with seeing as I have a Mimeoplasm deck. It’s actually not cheaper, seeing as Ludevic is minimum 2+5 versus Mimeo’s 5, and you don’t get to play Green so that’s also worse for you. It does start as a 4/4 base, but you’re not getting smaller than that very often with Mimeoplasm, and unlike that card Olag can’t be used as graveyard hate. Exiling cards from your own graveyard in a graveyard deck feels terrible. The long and short of this is just…play Mimeoplasm. They’re underrated these days.

 Wilhelt, the Rotcleaver

The first line of text on this dude is super flavourful, I really like the idea of this legion that just keeps getting back up. The second line of text is also really good, seeing as it works with either part of the first half and it generates value in what will be a board-based deck. And while it’s not exactly wrath protection, it does at least give you a pile of bodies for when you do get wrathed, ready to dogpile the guy that dared wipe your board. I’m always hesitant about precon face commanders, because they’re always a little too pushed for my liking, but I really don’t think Wilhelt is fuckbusted- just a very solid commander to helm a solid archetype.

 Florian, Voldaren Scion

Excuse me, what the fuck is this Vampire doing in my Werewolf set? Get this shit out of here. Florian is an aberration, and also a frustratingly boring one. He takes significant deckbuilding effort to be good, and even then best case scenario it’s an exile-draw impulse once per turn cycle. Rakdos was doing real well for a while, and probably will keep doing well in future considering the next set coming up, so this is a bit of a disappointment.

 Tovolar, Dire Overlord / Tovolar, the Midnight Scourge

I’ve already spent a bunch of time discussing Werewolves in EDH, so I’ll try to keep this brief. Tovolar is the epitome of “fine, here you go”. He’s a powerful Werewolf commander that compensates for the tribe’s weaknesses, gives you card advantage, and echoes an iconic card from the past. He is unquestionably the best Werewolf to helm your deck of the three total real options. I still kinda think you want Naya for this tribe, but if you don’t want to compromise on synergy or lose this effect (and to be fair it’s a lot) then here he is. It’s hard not to be cynical, seeing as I was one of the people fucking pissed at how nothing Ulrich was, but at least he exists now.

Maybe give us another one in Crimson Vow, WoTC?

 Katilda, Dawnhart Prime

This is kind of interesting, a proper Human tribal commander for GW. Now, unlike previous, where your options were Sigarda 2 in GW (which isn’t very good) and some other stuff like the Kudros for other colour combinations, Midnight Hunt has a couple new options for this exact deck, but at the very least they all do it a little differently. Katilda is effectively a second Cryptolith Rite, but one that gives you something to do with all that excess mana, which is pretty cool and good- decks that need to commit to the board often run out of cards (on account of having things get broken) and this makes sure you always have something to do with that mana. So sure! If you have a haste outlet it makes Increasing Devotion insanely free and that’s super spicy.

 Kyler, Sigardian Emissary

I find this substantially less interesting. Kyler is Thalia’s Lieutenant, but it works a bit better, but also its way more expensive. Anthem commanders are always underwhelming, because the effect is usually mediocre and also you can just…play anthems. But also, it doesn’t take much for this guy to make your team quite big. My biggest issue here is that I just think 5 mana is a lot for an aggressive commander like this, and in order to make him work you need to still be playing things afterwards- so the curve is going to be have to be super wonky.

 Leinore, Autumn Sovereign

Our other face commander for this set, Leinore is here to support the Coven mechanic, both making it easier to get three creatures with different powers (especially since she has 0 power herself, which is fairly uncommon) and rewarding you for doing so. She’s another card on this list that basically says “meet condition, draw a card every turn”, but at the very least she’s pumping the squad a little at the same time and she’s not super expensive. I think she’s a lot less interesting than the other face commander, Wilhelt, but she’s inoffensive.

 Sigarda, Champion of Light

Aside from immediately slamming into my cube, Sigarda part 3 looks a lot like Leinore in just drawing a card if you have Coven once per turn. The upside, Sigarda does a bunch of damage while doing it, and could feasibly finish someone off if necessary. The downside, she needs to get Humans, and she sure as -hell isn’t a Human herself. This off-tribe-ness is supremely awkward for what is effectively a tribal commander, and as a result I would be surprised if she saw much play in the zone. But seriously she’s so much better than the last one holy crap that card was mid.

 Liesa, Forgotten Archangel

I still don’t know why Liesa is…alive… but here she is again. I wasn’t a huge fan of the first card, and unfortunately the second one doesn’t change that. She takes a classic Orzhov commander in Athreos, removes the fun politics and play angle from it, gets more expensive, gets graveyard hate, and loses indestructible. I imagine some Athreos players will switch over since she guarantees a return, but she’s surprisingly boring for such a potentially interesting character. Liesa was one of the defenders of Innistrad along with her sisters, but one that was willing to actually interact with the darker creatures of her world and try to understand them rather than murdering them on sight. When Avacyn got created, she killed the fuck out of Liesa since that shit’s heresy, apparently, and had her name effectively wiped from the records- that she’s apparently been alive secretly the whole time begs a lot of questions and has a lot of potential flavour that this card does not represent. The card certainly can’t bring itself back from the dead.

 Vadrik, Astral Archmage

I wasn’t sure about this one, but LoadingReadyRun’s recent deck tech video on it did sell me on it a bit. Vadrik obviously invites comparisons to Mizzix, which is a well-known, kill-on-sight Commander at this point- while I don’t think he’s nearly as powerful as she is, he’s a different flavour of interesting and he is a whole mana cheaper. As well, I do like a lot that he grows himself in the process, giving the deck a board presence that Mizzix’s 2/2 stats don’t really contribute to. I’m still not sure how well day/night will play in the format, but with a deck full of instants you can probably get 2 counters per turn cycle without sacrificing your own tempo, which is decent enough.

 Old Stickfingers

I’m not sure where to be on Stickfingers. I love the flavour of this card, just being a scary forest monster that’s just a new but established in-universe part of the world, much like The Gitrog Monster. The card is kind of medium, though, and its text does really confuse me.

Okay, no, turns out I just misread it completely. You know when your brain just fills in the gaps with what it thinks is right? That’s what I did. I thought Stickfingers looked at the top X and just milled the creatures, but it reveals cards until it hits X creatures, which is muuuuuch better. The X cost effectively does act like it does on many a Hydra, but with added value for the graveyard decks it’s sure to lead. That and it can serve as an effective combo commander- just grab Necrotic Ooze and its combo pieces and some Regrowths and you’re good to go. I don’t think the card is going to be particularly interesting for more casual play, but I can at least admit that it’s much better than I’d assumed.

 Rem Karolus, Stalwart Slayer

He doesn’t explicitly say as much, but Rem is secretly a spellslinger commander, and one that gives other red decks a lot of trouble with you. Dealing one point of extra damage is rarely going to be game-changing, but it makes many a spell that little bit more efficient, and that prevention ability is the real deal. It’s never that hard to protect a single creature from damage, and if you find a way to do that with Rem, you’re basically immune to damage-based boardwipes, and in a great position to abuse the fuck out of them yourself. The card doesn’t really solve any of Boros’s shortcomings, but it is at least Doing A Thing, which is more than I can say for a lot of the combination’s commanders.

 Slogurk, the Overslime

Because Simic didn’t have enough of a lion’s share of the colour pie, here’s Simic doing what is really more of a Golgari or Gruul thing. I don’t hate getting to play with land stuff in blue (beyond Tatyova/Aesi style landfall), but this does feel like an overstepping. Besides the meta angle, the card…I dunno. It’s got a lot going on, but maybe I’m just burned out on playing around lands decks at this point. Slogurk bores me. I do kind of like the idea of hitting yourself with a Traumatize and just killing someone with this, though.

 Lynde, Cheerful Tormentor

Our closing act is one that is undeniably extremely cool. Not only is Lynde mechanically interesting, she’s also a new character that is tied to the surprisingly popular “unluckiest planeswalker” guy- I guess it might not have been luck this whole time. Curses are a really interesting build-around idea, and considering there are 29 (30 if you include Accursed Witch) of them in Grixis for Lynde to play with at this point, you do actually get to pick and choose a bit. She does somewhat suffer from being in the colours that basically don’t get to really play around with Enchantment synergy, but between her 3 colours I reckon there’s enough to keep her going- you can run some of Theros’s Constellation things. And she’s just….really cool. Putting the curse on you before you get to move it off to someone else feel so playful, the two cards a cackling compensation from this cruel master of cursecraft.

 And that’s the lot of them. Unfortunately, much of the Legendary offerings from Innistrad: Midnight Hunt are seriously mediocre. Many of the cards feel more fit for the deck itself than the commanding seat, and a fair few of them don’t even have much going on for that. There are a few real highlights- perhaps me being so into Lynde, Eloise and Gisa says something but I’m refusing to analyse that- but there’s just so many misses that I can’t help but feel underwhelmed. I think it’s somewhat telling of modern Magic design that there are more commanders in this release than were in the previous two Innistrad blocks combined, and yet despite predating the era when legendary creatures were designed for Commander, most of those cards will be better remembered for the format than this new batch.

[kpopgerapitico]

Top Five Comfort Characters

Tagged by @dramajib

So, in a surprise that is not surprising to anyone, I have over complicated this by writing way too much and making two lists, because two is better than one. The short of it is, I realized I have a few characters whose canonical presentation is a comfort to me, and a few characters whose fanon presentation is a comfort to me, but they don’t make sense being on the same list. So, two lists (also, gender is a thing with these . . . don’t know what that means . . .)

Canon Picks

Keladry of Mindelan (written by Tamora Pierce in the Protector of the Small quartet)

Kris Longknife (written by Mike Shepherd in Kris Longknife series)

Honor Harrington (written by David Weber in Honor Harrington Series)

Ha Moon Soo (played by Won Jin Ah in Just Between Lovers)

Ted Lasso (played by Jason Sudeikis in Ted Lasso)

Fanon Picks:

William “Dex” Poindexter (originally from Check, Please!)

James “ Jim” Kirk (originally from Star Trek (usually AOS))

Mako Mori (originally from Pacific Rim)

Merlin (originally from Merlin)

Keladry of Mindelan (wait, i’ll explain, if you want)

The Over Explanation:

Canon: These are characters that bring me enough joy that I have revisited them multiple times, to re-immerse myself in their lives and experiences. I enjoy their plots, but more than that, the characters themselves.

Kel: Kel is strong, brave and competent (see competency porn as it continues to rear its head for this entire canon list). She dominates in a traditionally male field, and challenges stereotypes about women in those roles. And I honestly could have made a list entirely formed of women from Tamora Pierce’s works, but I resisted and just chose her. If you haven’t read these books, I highly recommend them.

Kris: Kris is smart, creative and competent. She is a character that was introduced to me by my dad, who enjoys sci-fi epics, and I associate her stories with cold dark nights in the winter where my only entertainment was the radio, and any books I had around. Her stories have great adventures, and cunning solutions to world destroying problems. And you know she will always make it out in the end. Also, swoon worthy romance line that is always part of my re-reads.

Honor: Honor is regal, driven and competent. Like Kris, she is a sci-fi heroine who gets what she wants. Her stories have a lot more loss, but are also familiar beats to me from so many re-reads, that the pain feels worn down from time. She also has the benefit of avoiding the shitty family trope (same with Kel, though Kris’ family is a mess), and having the support of a dope empathic pet/sidekick/familiar. Also, she deals with issues of self confidence around feeling ugly, and feeling unworthy of romantic love, while also being confident in other aspects of her life, which resonates so heavily with me. It might be more heavy material, but it makes me feel hope for myself.

Moon Soo: Moon Soo is calm, emotional and competent. She blends a creative job with a stem field, which is something I wish I could do. She is also a great example of taking the emotional baggage trope in a new direction, both with how she handles her trauma and the emotional weight of her love interests trauma. Her series is again more heavy, but it works, and she is such a breath of fresh air, that every time I rewatch the show, I fall more in love with her.

Ted: Ted is kind, broken, and competent. Ted Lasso is in some ways the person I wish I was. He doesn’t see the world in rose tinted glasses, but rather chooses to always look on the bright side of things. And it isn’t a facade, it is a conscious choice to be positive and be kind. He may be new to my life, but I have already watched episodes over and over and over again, for his witty one-liners, and the fact that he feels like a warm hug.

Fanon: These are characters that are either minor in their original shows, or have a distinctive personality in fanon that draws me to their representations in other media. Or, in some cases, the extension of canon of a main character makes me all the happier.

Dex: Dex’s journey is often that about letting go of prejudice, and every time it happens, it makes me hopeful for what humanity can be. Because he grows to if not understand, than at least empathize with other people in nearly every work, and if that could happen to everyone in college, the world would be a better place. Seeing that reality is a lovely escape after any long day.

Kirk: Kirk’s journeys are almost always emotional, and often painful, which doesn’t necessarily feel comforting. But it is escapist, and feeds my urge for gossip and drama in a way that doesn’t hurt anyone. Sometimes his works are like reading a sitcom, sometimes a high level drama, and sometimes they are just a sci-fi epic with a big budget and lots of explosions. All are fun in their own ways, and keep me coming back, even on the worst of days.

Mako Mori: I don’t read a ton of Mako Mori fanon works, but any time she is mentioned anywhere, I get a smile on my face because she is such a great character. She is connected to her emotions without being defined by them, and she got a plot in a big budget action thriller that is about her rather than romance. I love when people love her, and it is nice to see so many people appreciate what she represents.

Merlin. He’s so fun and weird and strange and loving. He is supportive of all of his friends. And his stories are often about accepting ones truth, or revealing oneself in meaningful ways to the people around you, which is a cathartic trope for me.

Kel: She’s back because there is this one like 100,000 word fic that I’ve read a couple of times over the pandemic that made even huge problems seem like they can be solved, and made me feel hopeful. She is an escape in fanon as much as in canon, and I love her for it.

If you want to do this, do this! Everyone I would tag has already done it!

[unloveable-unreachable]

You’re the One My Heart Wants- Chapter 12

Word Count: 6,481

Warnings: Mentions of bad past relationships. If for some reason this is triggering, please don’t read this chapter & Swearing

Author: Me

A/N: Anddd part of this chapter is for @christenohara​, you’re welcome dude lol

Alex POV

I wake up to the warmth and weight of Y/N sleeping on top of me. She had her head resting on my chest and her arms wrapped around me, her breaths low and quiet. It was adorable seeing her this soft, considering how she acts on the pitch. She’s been known to intimidate opposing players just from her resting bitch face, well and her dominating footwork. She’s just a big teddy bear with a hard past and family life. A past that she hasn’t really spoken to me about, especially the stuff Ali brought up last night before dinner. I hate the thought of anyone hurting her: past relationships, old girlfriend’s families, and even her own family. She’s the most caring and sweetest person I’ve ever known, so why would anyone treat her so badly for being her? She can be pretty stubborn though, but I’ll just blame that on Kelley. It’s not my place to force her, if she wants to tell me about her past then she will. While I’m lost in my thoughts, I’m stroking my girlfriend’s hair which causes her grip around me to tighten slightly and her to snuggle her face into my chest. I smiled softly at the sight of her, knowing that I would be completely and fully happy waking up next to her for the rest of my life. That’s something I’ll keep to myself though… 

After a few more moments, I hear her mumble something while she moves slightly. Her eyes open slowly before she squints them in response to the sunlight coming through our window. She rolls over to her back and groans as she covers her eyes with her hands when the alarm goes off. “Well, good morning to you too,” I said with a small laugh while I shut off the alarm. She peeks her eyes out from between her fingers to look at me, a smile forming on her face. “Good morning, babe,” she says with a yawn, “I hate mornings, I swear. Well, besides getting to wake up next to you.” She gives me a goofy smile and a wink after her statement, which causes me to hit her shoulder with a laugh. “Yeah, yeah,” I say while rolling my eyes, “Trying to be cute while you’re grumpy isn’t a good combo. Now, if you want breakfast you’re going to have to get up now because we have to leave for training soon.” That causes her to groan loudly before getting out of bed. She stops at the end of the bed and stretches, allowing me to catch a glimpse of her abs. “Hey now,” Y/N says when she catches me staring, “I may be a tease but keep it in your pants, you goof.” I laugh as I get up from the bed and head over to my suitcase, “Can you blame me? You’re hot. Just stating facts.” As I got dressed she yelled from the bathroom, “Oh yeah, says the swimsuit model!” I rolled my eyes while I grabbed my phone and my bag as I walked towards the bathroom, “I’m heading downstairs, I’ll see you at breakfast. This fake argument isn’t over either.” She gave me a soft smile, which I returned, and nodded her head before giving me a quick kiss.

When I get down to breakfast, Kelley and Allie call me over to go sit with them while I grab something quick to eat. “Hey, Al,” they both say as I sit down. “Hey, guys,” I answer as Kelley gives me a look, “Something wrong, Kel? You’ve got a weird look on your face.” She let out a small laugh as she looked over at Allie then back at me, “I guess you’re in a better mood today, compared to last night.” “What do you mean?” I asked with a confused look. She let out a low sigh as she said, “Last night you were a little on edge, especially when it came to Y/N. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were a little jealous of her friends being clingy and Lindsey sitting on h--” “I wasn’t jealous,” I say quickly, interrupting her. She looked over at Allie before they both started laughing, “Okay, yeah. Sure, Al. Jealous or not, you were in a weird mood the whole night. Am I wrong?” I looked at both of them for a few moments, trying to read their expressions. Which, of course, all I see is knowing looks. I let out a loud sigh as I ran my hand over my face before saying, “As much as I hate to admit it, you’re not wrong. I wasn’t jealous. I just had a lot on my mind and it put me in a weird mood. I’m sorry if that put you guys in a weird situation.” Right after I said that I see Y/N walk in the room. She smiled when she saw me and headed towards our table after talking to JJ and Crystal. “It’s fine, Alex,” Allie says, drawing my attention back to them, “We just wanted to make sure you were okay.” “I’m okay, guys. I promise,” I answer with a smile as my girlfriend took the seat next to me. “What are we talking about?” Y/N asked with a confused look. “Just about last night,” Kelley answered while glancing over at me, “Dinner, and everyone’s Instagram stories mostly.” “Oh, yeah,” Y/N said while she pulled out her phone, “I haven’t even looked at them yet.” She set her phone down on the table while she ate so she could watch what was going on. She laughed every now and then while she watched each video pass through her screen. I watched her as she smiled at the chaos of Lindsey’s story and the jokes on Sonnett’s, and it made me smile for a moment. The moment is short-lived whenever she clicks on Ash’s story, and the first thing that pops up is the video of her and her friends. My smile fades while I watch the videos go on with Lindsey on her lap, and try my best to hide my discomfort. 

Y/N groans as she watched the rest of the videos she and her friends were in and Kelley laughs at her reaction. “What are you laughing at, Smalls?” Y/N asks with a fake glare. “Oh, nothing, Biggie Smalls,” Kelley said through her laughs, “But it looks like we need to leave you and Janice alone to talk.” All three of them look at me to see the discomfort clear across my face. Allie and Kelley get up and walk over to Tobin and Christen’s table a few moments later, leaving Y/N the only one staring at me. “Alex?” she asked quietly, “Is there something wrong that you want to tell me?” I sighed before looking at her, seeing her light blue eyes full of confusion. “It’s just the same stuff we talked about last night,” I say reluctantly, “The videos just brought it all up again. I’m sorry, nothing’s wrong. I promise.” She gave me a sad look before nodding her head. “Okay,” she said while taking my hand in hers, “If you say so, babe…” “I do say so,” I answer, “I promise I’m fine, we’re fine.” Y/N’s sad expression has faded as she gives me a soft smile, which I return. After a moment of getting stuck in a trance caused by the changing colors of Y/N’s eyes, I pull her in for a quick kiss. “Alright, break it up,” we hear Ash say as we pull away from the kiss a few seconds later, “There are children present. Save that for your room.” She motioned to Mal and Tierna sitting at the next table as she and Ali sat down across from us. I gave them a smirk as Y/N rolled her eyes at them while saying, “Yeah, yeah. Thanks for the tip, mom.” Ash laughs while Ali asks about how things went with my family last night. We talk for a few more minutes before we head out of the hotel to the vans for training.

Y/N POV

Saying that I’m glad to be able to train again would be a fucking understatement. I’ve missed everything about training: the drills, scrimmaging, and even the running (if you can believe that). Being stuck on the sidelines for two whole weeks has been brutal, only because I wanted to be out there playing with everyone else. So yeah, I’m excited about how things are going at training, for once. “Way to go Y/N!” Jill yelled from the sideline after I scored another goal in our 2v2 scrimmages, “I’m glad to see that you didn’t let those two weeks put you behind everyone else. Keep up the hard work. Next goal wins!” I smiled and gave her a thumbs-up while I walked back into position. “You’re doing really good, Y/N,” Alex says from beside me, “I mean, you have a great partner so that definitely helps how good you’re doing.” I rolled my eyes at her with a smile as I hit her arm, “Alright, alright. My partner is pretty good, definitely helping us kick ass. Let’s win this one so we can get training over with.” She gave me a mischievous grin and a wink as she passed me the ball, “I love you, you goof.” “I know you do!” I yell as I head down the pitch, getting past Sonny with ease thanks to my quick footwork and speed. “How are you so fucking fastttt?!” Sonny yells as she tries to keep up with me, causing me to laugh while I passed the ball to Alex. As Sonny and I moved up the pitch towards the goal, I watched Alex go 1v1 against Kelley. Kelley was trash talking as Alex tried everything to get past her, it was pretty funny if I’m being honest. Alex had a smile plastered across her face as she listened to Kelley, and it only grew when she managed to get past her after Kelley tripped over her own feet. Alex sees me open near the goal as Kelley starts catching up with her, and quickly sends a long ball towards the goal. I moved on goal as Sonny stayed right on my ass, and stretched my leg out in time for my foot to meet the ball just before it hit the pitch. I did a small turn with the ball at my feet as I stepped back, causing Sonny to overrun me just enough to give me space to shoot my shot on goal. “Fuck, you,” Sonny groaned when the ball hit the back of the net, “I just want to beat you once, just fucking once! Kelley, next time you’re on Y/N. Her footwork is fucking impossible to keep up with, but at least you can keep up with her and her long ass legs.” I laughed and patted Sonny on the shoulder as Jill called the end of training. 

Alex jumped on my back while we walked back towards our stuff, “You really kicked some ass out there, Y/N. It was like these past two weeks never happened. I’m proud of you, baby.” I smiled as she kissed my cheek while I continued to carry her to the sidelines, “Thanks, babe. I was just happy to be back on the pitch. I’m really glad you were my partner today though, it was a nice change for once. Normally I’m stuck with Sonny or Lindsey and that always ends in an argument or uncontrollable laughter.” She laughed in agreement to my statement since we all know how Lindsey and Sonny can get. When we got to our bags, I set her down on the ground and sat down on the bench. “Are you okay?” I asked quietly as she sat down next to me, “I know we didn’t really talk through what happened at breakfast, and you just seemed a little distracted…” She sighed as she untied her cleats and tossed her shin guards into her bag. We sat there in awkward silence for a moment before she turned to face me. “I’m okay,” she said quietly, “The stuff that happened last night and this morning, isn’t important. I’m not upset anymore, I’m fine. If for some reason I need to talk to you about what’s going on in my head, I will. I won’t put you through the same thing I did last night where you were confused and I was being possessive. I promise, baby.” I wasn’t fully convinced by what she said, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt since I love her more than words can describe. Also because I didn’t want to start an argument over something this stupid. I nodded my head and gave her a soft smile while she said, “Come on, let's go back to the hotel and change. I want to spend the rest of the day with you in Paris before we’re too busy to enjoy it.” She grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the vans with a bright smile plastered across her face, causing me to laugh with a goofy ass grin.

After we got to the hotel, we both showered and put on some comfortable clothes to walk around in. While I finished putting my hair up and looked at my outfit in the mirror, a tie-dye t-shirt with jean shorts and my favorite pair of Vans, I notice that Alex is digging through my suitcase. “And what exactly do you think you’re doing?” I asked with a small smile while crossing my arms and leaning against the wall. Alex jumped when she realized she wasn’t being as sneaky as she thought. “I’m looking for a shirt to wear,” she said with a sheepish smile, “I like how soft yours are…” I let out a small laugh because surprisingly she wasn’t the first person to say that to me. All four of my idiot best friends have all said that at least once or twice whenever they borrow my clothes, but they aren’t who I’m reminded of whenever Alex said that. That’s for another time, hopefully something I never have to address… “Y/N?” I hear Alex ask, pulling me out of the thoughts from my past, “Are you okay, baby?” I realize that she’s staring at me with a concerned look while she held two of my shirts. I moved off of the wall, stood up straight and gave her a smile as I nodded my head, “Yeah, babe. I’m fine. I was just remembering something from a long time ago…” She took a step towards me and placed her hands on my cheeks, causing me to tense up slightly. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked softly, not taking her eyes off me. I closed my eyes and shook my head as my body relaxed. “No, Alex. We don’t need to talk about it right now, okay?” I say as I wrap my arms around her waist, “It’s just a lot to unload on you. We’ll talk about it at some point, just not now.” She sighed slightly before caressing my cheek, “Okay, Y/N. I’m always here if you need someone to talk to. I just want to help you whenever something’s bothering you. You know that, right?” I smiled down at my girlfriend while I tightened my grip around her slightly, “I know, babe. Thank you for that, seriously. I promise I’ll talk to you about it at some point.” She gave me a smirk as she nodded her head before pulling me in for a quick kiss. “I love you so much, Y/N,” she said whenever we pulled away. “I love you so much more, Al,” I say with a small grin, “And I always will, no matter what.” She leaned up and kissed my nose before giving me a smile as she pulled me towards the bed. “Okay,” she says, “Now, help me pick a shirt to wear so we can meet Kelley and Allie downstairs.” She held up two different shirts, one is a pastel purple and the other is for my favorite band. “So, we’re still sharing my clothes,” I said with a laugh as she blushed slightly, “We’ve moved on from pajamas to the rest of my wardrobe, I see. Where did you even find that one? I didn’t know I packed it.” I was pointing to the band shirt as she just smiled at me before saying, “I like your clothes. Like I said, they’re soft. Now, help meeee.” I groaned softly before picking the pastel purple, “That one will look good on you, and I won’t mind if you end up stealing it. The other one is for my favorite band and I don’t want it to end up in your suitcase.” She smiled brightly while she kissed my cheek and headed into the bathroom to finish getting ready.

After we left the hotel, we just walked around the stores nearby for an hour or so. Alex was mostly with Allie since they both enjoyed shopping way more than me and Kelley. When we found yet another store that they wanted to go in, Kelley and I opted out and said we would wait on a bench for them. Alex whined and pouted for me to go in the store with her for a few moments before she finally gave up. Since she couldn’t kiss me, like she looked like she wanted to, so she just settled with a smile and a wink before stepping in the store with Allie. “You two are pretty cute,” Kelley said after a few minutes of sitting on the bench together, “Totally and completely in love. You know, she really needed someone like you to come along and make her life fucking great. She talks about you a lot whenever you’re not around. You’ve got her whipped for sure.” “Thanks, Smalls,” I say with a soft smile and a laugh, “We make each other really happy. I really do love her, like it’s scary sometimes. But you know all about that, don’t you?” Kelley gave me a soft smile and a nod since she knew what I was referring to, as I continued, “Do you miss Casey whenever we’re at tournaments like this? I know you told us that she can’t be here for a while because of work…” Kelley’s smile faded a little as she sighed loudly. She ran her hands over her face before saying, “Yeah, Biggie Smalls. I really do… But I know she’ll be here as soon as she can. We Facetime every day before she goes to work and she calls me right before I go to bed whenever she gets off work. So, I mean that helps a little while we’re away. But, it’s not like what you and Alex have…” I looked at her with a confused look before asking, “What do you mean?” She looked around us to make sure we were still alone before turning back to me, “You get to be with her every day here, and when we go back home you’ll still see her every day. Even if you aren’t sharing a room anymore. Casey lives in D.C. while I live in Utah and Atlanta. I don’t know, it’s just hard I guess. I love her so much, Biggie Smalls…” She had a small upset look after she finished, which caused me to place my hand on her shoulder to give her a little comfort. “Kel,” I say quietly, “If you love her as much as I know you do then, hear me out here, why don’t you move to D.C. to be with her just during the off-season? I mean, if it were me, I’d move anywhere in the world just to be with Alex.” The upset look on her face was replaced with a bright smile as she pulled me in for a hug. “Thank you, Y/N,” she said when we pulled away, “I hadn’t really thought of that. I’ll have to talk to her about it, but I think that’s what I’m going to do.” I smiled at her as she continued talking excitedly, like a child, about moving to be with her girlfriend. 

“You know what’s kinda funny?” She asked after a few moments. “What?” I answered, a little worried about what she could possibly say. “You and I, Biggie Smalls and Smalls,” she said while motioning between us, “Both have secret girlfriends. What a time to be alive!” She was laughing loudly, which caused me to laugh even louder as I hit her shoulder. “You’re such an idiot,” I say through my laughter. “You still love me though,” she says with a wink and a goofy grin. “This is true,” I say as I rolled my eyes, still laughing along with her. “What’s going on over here?” we hear Alex ask over our laughter a few seconds later. We continued laughing as we both turned to look at the two starting at us with multiple bags in their hands. Kelley’s eyes got wide as she kept laughing, “Oh, nothing. Just talking about our love lives, nothing special.” I hit her arm to get her to keep it down while Alex looked over at me. “Oh, really?” she asked with a small smirk as she raised an eyebrow at me, “Those love lives must be pretty funny based on how you two are acting. God help the people you two are dating.” Allie laughed along with Alex as they started walking down the street with me and Kelley following close behind. “I mean, they’re pretty great actually,” Kelley said with a grin, causing Alex and Allie to turn around, “Anyone would be lucky to date Smalls or Biggie Smalls of the United States Women’s National Team. And as far as we know, they both know how lucky they are.” She wiggled her eyebrows at Alex while I blushed at the shit she just said with my hand covering my mouth. “Don’t fall for it, Al,” Allie said with a small laugh, “She’s just trying to get under your skin.” Alex stood there and stared at Kelley for what felt like forever before a smile formed on her face, “I’m not going to argue about this with you in the middle of Paris, Kel. But if you really wanted an answer, they do know how lucky they are. Extremely lucky, in fact.” Alex glanced over at me whenever she said that last part with the smile still present on her face. Kelley hit my shoulder with a laugh as I smiled and nodded towards Alex. “Come onnn,” Allie whined a few seconds later, “I’m hungryyy.” Kelley took that as her opportunity to jump on Allie’s back while we walked towards a nearby restaurant.

Alex POV

After we ate, we were back to walking up and down the streets of Paris that weren’t too far from the hotel. Kelley was with Allie now, making videos for each other’s Instagram story, and I was hanging back with Y/N. We were walking as close to each other as we could since we can’t hold hands like we’d like to because of the public, also because she had all of my bags in her hands. Chivalry isn’t dead, just FYI. Y/N looked like she was lost in her thoughts for a moment before I nudged her shoulder, “You okay?” She looked over at me to see the same concerned look that I gave her in our room earlier. I knew something was bothering her and I wanted to help. I just don’t know how much I can help though. “I’m fine,” she said with a small smile, “Just a lot on my mind right now.” I stopped walking and grabbed her wrist. “Kelley, Allie we’ll catch up with you guys in a minute,” I said to the two in front of us, who nodded while they kept walking. Y/N watched them keep walking down the street before she turned to look at me, “What’s wrong?” I pulled her over to a nearby bench and looked into her eyes as I said, “Nothing’s wrong, at least not with me. Talk to me, Y/N. I know something’s wrong because you’re acting a little weird. Weirder than usual, actually.” She just stared at me for a moment, seeing how worried I am. Whatever was bothering her must be pretty serious since she hasn’t spoken yet. She sighed a few minutes later before saying, “It’s just that stuff I didn’t really want to talk about back in our room earlier.” “Does it have something to do with what Ali told me last night?” I asked quietly. I could see her body physically tense up and her jaw clench at my question. She took a few long, deep breaths before she looked at me again. Her eyes were stone-cold and she was giving me an Ashlyn Harris look. I must’ve set something off in her without realizing it. “What did Ali tell you?” Y/N asked quietly through gritted teeth.

I shifted in my seat as a reaction to the way she was looking at me since she’s never looked at me like this before. “All she said was that she and Ash were worried about you meeting my family,” I answered quietly, “Because you’ve had issues in the past with meeting your girlfriend’s family…” Y/N’s face didn’t change much, still stone-cold but her eyes softened a little. She took another long breath before saying, “She shouldn’t have told you that. But in any case…in the past I have had issues with my girlfriend’s family. Mostly because they didn’t want their daughter to be gay or believe that she was. One time they took it out on me instead of her, calling me names and yelling at me while she just stood there and watched…” She paused so she could compose herself, probably remembering everything that’s happened to her, and it took everything in me to not hold her hand to give her some comfort. “It’s okay, Y/N,” I said, causing her to look up at me with tears forming in her eyes, “We don’t have to keep talking about this. I’m not going to force you into talking about something that hurt you in the past that obviously upsets you.” She shook her head before saying, “No, I want to talk to you about this. You should at least know something about it… What’s been bothering me for a good part of the day is something you said in the room. It triggered a memory from my last relationship and not a good memory at that. She was great at the beginning, then I don’t know something changed. Her family didn’t approve of us dating and made that pretty clear throughout our relationship. Then near the end of our relationship, things got...messy. She would get mad about how much time I spent at training and with the team. She started being hateful towards me and said that her family was right about me. She hurt me in every way possible, mentally and emotionally. I finally had it after a few months and broke up with her. It never got physical, but it could’ve if I didn’t end it when I did. There’s more that happened after the breakup but it’s something I don’t talk about, even with Ali and Ash. I tell Kelley everything, and she doesn’t even know...” She paused again to wipe her tears away, deep in thought, while I looked at her with tears forming in my eyes. 

She turned to face me and placed her hands on my shoulders, “I don’t want you to think that I don’t love your family, because I truly do. They’ve treated me so great from the moment they met me. It’s something I wasn’t used to, but it’s honestly the best thing I could ever ask for. I love them all, almost as much as I love you. I don’t want any of this to scare you away... I just have a messy past that I don’t like talking about. I’m not shutting you out when I don’t tell you these things, they’re just not important to me anymore. They don’t make me happy to think about, let alone talk about with anyone. My happiness is more important to me and you’re a source of my happiness, Alex. Please don’t leave me…” She had tears falling to her cheeks and if I’m being honest here, I was a crying mess. She looked so broken and fragile, not like the Y/N I knew. It was breaking my heart. She was right when she said this was a lot to unload, but I was mostly crying because she’s afraid I’ll leave her. I’d never do that in a million years. “I would never leave you, Y/N,” I said through my sniffling, “I fucking hate that all of that happened to you. You didn’t deserve any of that. I would never fucking hurt you the way she did, you’re perfect just the way you are. My family absolutely loves you, probably more than they love me. They would never treat you the way those other people did. If my mom knew about this, she would do everything in her power to protect you from hateful people like that. I love you more than anything. Nothing you say to me will scare me away and there’s nothing that would cause me to leave you. I’m in this for the long haul, I promise.” She smiled when I finished while she wiped my tears away and pulled me in for a quick hug. “I love you more, babe,” she whispered in my ear. “Not possible,” I whispered back as we pulled away from our hug. After a few minutes, I get a call from Kelley, “Hey, where are you guys? The team is getting ready for team bonding and dinner so… Come on, lovebirds!” I laugh while letting her know we were on our way as Y/N and I stood up from the bench and headed towards the hotel, our smiles never fading.

The Next Day- Thailand Match

“Alex, wake up,” I hear my girlfriend say as I cuddled more into her, not wanting to wake up just yet, “Come on, babe. We have to get up and go downstairs before they send a search party for us. It’s game day, and you’re not going to make us late.” I groaned as I opened my eyes to see a pretty annoyed face coming from Y/N. “Well, aren’t we happy this morning?” I said, causing her to give me a small smile as she rolled her eyes, “Good morning, baby.” She leaned down and kissed my forehead before saying, “Good morning, sleepy head. And I am happy, by the way. Who gets to wake up next to Alex Morgan every day? That would be me, and that’s definitely something to be happy about. Oh, and it’s game day and I actually get to play today.” She was smiling brightly as she talked, it was adorable. I couldn’t help but let the smile on my face grow as she talked. “Now, as I was saying earlier,” she said as she flipped me over on my back and hovered over me, “It’s time to get up and go down to breakfast so we can go to the stadium.” I rolled my eyes as I said, “Okay, fine. I’m awake.” She grinned at me as I went to pull her down for a kiss. “Nope,” she said as she pulled away and hopped off the bed, leaving me with an upset look, “No kisses till you get up and get dressed so we aren’t late. No, no. Don’t pout at me, we should’ve been downstairs already.” I groaned at the fact that my pouting didn’t work this time as I got up from the bed. “You’re no fair,” I whined as I walked past her, causing her to laugh. “You still love me though,” she said quickly as I stepped into the bathroom. “Mhm, sure,” I say as I peered my head out to look at her with a smirk and a wink.

While I was in the bathroom, I hear a loud banging on the door. “Calm down, I’m coming,” Y/N says before she opened the door. “Why aren’t you at breakfast already?” I hear someone ask after the door was opened. I peered my head out of the bathroom to see Ali and Y/N bickering. “I was just about to come downstairs, I swear,” Y/N said before she realized I was listening to their conversation, “I had to make sure Alex got up since she insisted on oversleeping.” “Hey!” I said as she turned to look at me with a goofy grin, “I didn’t mean to oversleep. I’m up now and almost ready to go, but you can go down with Ali if you want to. I’ll meet you down there. Also, who almost made us late yesterday morning?” Y/N rubbed the back of her neck while she gave me an apologetic smile, knowing I had a point. Ali looked between the two of us before she started giggling. “Why are you giggling, Ali?” Y/N asked while she stood in between us with her arms crossed. Ali continued giggling as she said, “You two bicker more than me and Ash do. And you’ve only been dating for what, almost two months now? You’re like an old married couple.” Y/N groaned as she went to push Ali out of our room while I laughed. “Yeah, yeah whatever you say, mom,” she said once she finally managed to get Ali out in the hallway, “I’ll see you down there, babe. I love you.” “What? It’s cute, Y/N,” I hear Ali say from the hallway with laughter clear in her voice. I smiled at my struggling girlfriend as I said, “I’ll be down there in two minutes, I promise. I love you more, baby.” The last thing I saw before the door closed was her shining blue eyes and a beaming smile. Damn, I could get used to that. It definitely made me get ready a whole lot faster.

Y/N POV

Breakfast was uneventful since we were all talking about today’s match and how we needed to show that our team is a force to be reckoned with. Alex ended up sitting with Allie, Kelley, JJ, Crystal, and Becky since I was already at a full table. I was sandwiched between my moms while we sat with Pinoe, Christen, Tobin, and Carli. We talked more and more game tactics before we needed to get on the bus, which only continued for the entire bus ride. “I think if we start off guns blazing we should be pretty good,” Ash said while making a lot of hand gestures. Typical Ash. “Guns blazing?” Ali asked with a skeptical look, “What are you twelve? Jesus, Ash. I love you, but say it in a more grown-up way.” “When has she ever been a grown-up?” I asked with a laugh. That caused our little group to bust out laughing while Ash punches my shoulder. “Hey now,” Ash says through her laughter, “Look who’s talking? What are you like ten-years-old?” After laughing at what Ash said, our conversation fell back into game tactics with more grown-up words. When the bus came to a stop maybe 30 minutes later, Jill stood up and gave out instructions, “Okay, ladies. I want you to change into your warm-up gear and meet me and the rest of the coaches out on the pitch in the next 20 minutes. We need to get in some more drills before it’s game time. Let’s go!” 

Everyone grabbed their things and rushed off the bus towards the locker room. While I’m walking next to Ash, I feel someone throw their arm around my shoulders. I pulled out my headphones and turned to see who could possibly be messing with me while I get my head in game mode. I should’ve known it was Sonny with her big ass grin. “What do you want, Emily?” I said with a smirk since I knew she didn’t like it when I called her by her first name. “First off, who is this Emily you speak of? Because last time I checked, my name is Sonny,” she said with a fake confused expression, “Second, I was just wishing you good luck. Since I’ll be watching my three very best friends kick ass today.” I smiled at her and thanked her before she ran off with Lindsey to bug Rose and Mal. After we all got changed and went out to the pitch, Jill separated us based on our positions. The warm-up only lasted maybe an hour before we were told to go back to our locker rooms to get dressed for the match. “You ready, kiddo?” Ali asked while I finished tying my cleats, “I know you’ve been out of it for the past two weeks, so it’s alright to be nervous.” I smiled up to her as I stood up, meeting her gaze. “I’m more than ready, mom,” I say with confidence, “I’m actually not nervous, for once. I feel like this match is going to be fucking amazing.” She laughed as she pulled me in for a hug. “Don’t smother the starter, babe,” Ash says as she walks up to us, “She’s got some ass to kick.” I laughed along with them as I gave Ash one of our bear hugs. “Hey, don’t smother me either!” Ash said while trying to get out of my grasp. I let go and gave her an apologetic smile as she patted the top of my head with one of her goofy grins. “Ladies,” Jill says from the doorway a moment later, “It’s time to get in the tunnel. Let’s go!” As I walked between my moms towards the door, I catch Alex’s eyes. She smiled at me, which I returned, and mouthed ‘I love you’ before she went to the front of our line. I didn’t have to answer her because she knew I loved her almost as much as she loves me. I’ll talk to her during halftime, we need to stay focused on the task at hand. While in the tunnel, all I hear is white noise while I drown out the sound of the crowd. 

Our first match of the tournament, here we go.

To Be Continued

[1dfangirls35]

Voir Dire (N.H.)

A fake dating OU about contracts, soulmates and risking it all for love

Masterlist // Tell Me What You Think!

twenty-four

If you had asked Kelsey what her plans for her weekend in Vegas were, they wouldn't have included this: standing at the door of Niall's hotel room at five in the morning with last night's mascara clinging to her cheeks, wondering if it was too late to turn around and run the other way.

It wasn't too late. Not yet, because she hadn't knocked and he didn't know that she was here and she hadn't stared into those gorgeous blue eyes that always seemed to hypnotize her. If she really wanted she could keep it that way; she could go back down the elevator and into her starched white hotel sheets, and get on a plane again in a few hours like last night night never happened. But somehow she was stuck. Her feet cemented in place in front of the white hotel room door. And as much as her brain told her it wasn't too late to forget last night ever happened, the rest of her body resists.

Niall had first proposed the idea of meeting up again last night after their...encounter...at the after party. But proposed wasn't the right word, Niall's words had been more urgent than that, borderline begging.

"I just need a few minutes to speak to you," Niall had pleaded. "I need to explain. Please let me explain." Niall's eyes begged for forgiveness.

Kelsey had turned away, making her way toward the door, every second she spent with Niall bringing her closer and closer to disaster.

"Room 502. 5 am. Please Kelsey just give me a chance to explain."

Kelsey hadn't said anything back. Instead, she'd made her way back to the dance floor and was met by Mallory's "where have you been?".

Kelsey had tossed and turned all night over this. She knew it was wrong, going to see Niall. She knew what was at stake. But she was like an addict, and Niall Horan was her drug of choice. Twenty minutes with him in a glammed up bathroom had rekindled every feeling that she'd tried to bury since she let him go months ago.

Kelsey inhaled deeply. She couldn't let this weekend ruin everything she'd sacrificed so far. But she had so many questions, and those questions could only be answered by doing exactly what she wasn't supposed to do. She raised her hand to knock.

"You came," Niall said with a grin as he opened the door and Kelsey entered the doorway. Her hair was half curled from last night, some remnants of mascara clinging to her lashes, but in the early morning light, all Niall could think about was just how beautiful she was.

He wondered how he ever made it through the past four months without her, but then realized he hadn't. Not really.

"Yes," she replied softly, glancing around the room as if she was being followed. She seemed scared, hesitant and Niall wondered just what had transpired that had made Kelsey so afraid.

"Let's go," Niall gestured out the door.

"Where exactly?" Kelsey raised an eyebrow, wondering where on earth Niall thought the two of them would be going, especially with Niall still dressed in a fluffy white bathrobe. His hair was tousled as if he'd just rolled out of bed, but his eyes seemed brighter this morning, as if he'd gotten a lot more sleep than Kelsey had.

"Somewhere no one will find us," Niall whispered, his voice creating goosebumps on Kelsey's arms.

The staircase was somewhere Niall and the lads had discovered back in the One Direction days. A rickety, metal roof-access staircase that was used once or twice a year. The stairs weren't pretty, but the view of Las Vegas from the rooftop was, and that was exactly what Niall wanted to show Kelsey in the early morning light.

It's still dark when Niall props open the rusty metal door revealing the hotel roof, but Kelsey still feels exposed, her mind racing at all the ways they could be caught up here.

Niall sensed her fear, because he places his hand, warm, on the small of back and whispered "Basil's watching the stairs, don't worry." Even that doesn't calm Kelsey's anxiety.

Kelsey followed Niall to a place on the center of the roof, sitting beside him and gazing out upon the Las Vegas strip. Sunrise is just beginning to appear on the horizon, and for a moment Kelsey forgot why she is here, or what has happened between them. It's just her and Niall. Like it used to be.

Niall cleared his throat nervously, bringing Kelsey back to reality. "Last night, there were a lot of..." he gulped, searching for exactly the right word to explain what happened last night. "Emotions." He glanced over at Kelsey, and saw that she had shown a sliver of a smile. "I just wanted a chance for you to hear it from me. My side of the story instead of TMZ's."

Kelsey didn't say anything. She just nodded. Niall wondered if maybe this was going to be a one-sided conversation after all.

"It was a mistake Kels," Niall exclaimed, as if that wasn't entirely obvious. "I was sad and she was sad and I just wanted something to numb the pain. And the second it was over all I could think about was you. And how much that hurt you," Niall felt emotion seeping into his voice at the memory of just how awful that moment had been. "Every day since then I've wished that I could take it back. That if I was just given one chance to live that day over again, I wouldn't do it. Because it didn't take away the pain, it amplified it."

Kelsey couldn't look Niall in the eyes, instead she stared out street blacktop below them, empty, with only the earliest of inhabitants cruising the streets.

Niall saying it was all a mistake should have made her feel better. But instead it makes her worse. Because the only reason he was ever in that position in the first place was because of her.

"I didn't want to be a father, not like this. But she's got no one. No one, Kelsey. And this isn't just her fault or her responsibility. It took two of us," Niall laughed forcefully, as if he had made a joke. "She gave me the option you know. We ended the contract. And I could have run, god how I wanted to run. But that wouldn't be right you know? We are still figuring it out. How to do this whole co-parenting, and we've got some time but I just. I need you to know that there is nothing there- nothing there romantically. It's just giving this kid a life with two parents that love 'em."

Niall turned to look at Kelsey, realizing he had been rambling, but she remained silent. She's staring at the concrete of the rooftop now, her fingers drawing circles on the cement. He wondered if he had gotten this all wrong. Maybe last night hadn't really happened, maybe there hadn't been a moment where everything seemed like it was going to be okay. Maybe she was still as angry with him as she was the moment he stepped into that bathroom.

Niall thought that maybe he should be quiet. He'd been doing an awful lot of talking, and he had really hoped that by sharing his story, maybe Kelsey would share hers. But there's one more thought in the back of his mind. And he know he can't come to terms with whatever the next chapter of their story is until he says it aloud. "A melody came to me last night, after the party," he paused. "I haven't been able to write in months and then BOOM, I see you and suddenly my music has returned to me. It's no coincidence, Kelsey. You're back in my life and now so is my music."

Kelsey stayed silent, biting the inside of her cheek to keep tears from forming. The fact that thee contract between Niall and Krystal had ended. The fact that he was handling the situation exactly as she thought he would. The fact that he thought she was 'back in his life'. It was all too much.

She tried to remain expressionless, because that's what she was supposed to do right? She was supposed to resist every bone in her body screaming at her to lean over and kiss Niall.

"Damnit Kelsey say something!" Niall exclaimed, reaching out to touch Kelsey's arm, as her eyes met his for the first time since he started speaking. They aren't the happy or forgiving eyes that Niall was hoping to see, nor the angry eyes he was fearing. They were blank, almost as if she wasn't there at all.

"Thank you for telling me," she said softly.

Niall sighed, and Kelsey can hear the annoyance in his breath. "That's it? Honestly Kelsey it would feel better if you yelled at me. I know something's going on, please just tell me. I won't be mad," his voice shifted to concern.

"I wish I could Niall. God, I wish I could tell you everything. But I can't."

"Then tell me what you're so scared of," he grabbed her hands and she didn't pull away.

"Everything," Kelsey said softly, "I'm scared I'll lose everything." I may have already lost it , she thought to herself.

"Whatever it is Kelsey, whatever they made you sign. We can fight it. I can fix it. Let me fix it!"

The tears Kelsey had tried so hard to contain were starting to escape, one sliding down the side of her nose. She reached her hand up and tried to quickly wipe it away before he noticed. "I can't risk it Niall. I just can't."

Niall opened his mouth again to speak, but Kelsey stopped him before the words could leave his lips. Because she knew how this would go. Niall didn't see things like Kelsey saw them. He was an idealist, and he wouldn't understand it unless she laid it out clearly- well, as clearly as she could without violating the NDA.

"You, you may lose your contract or your tour or your album but you will have something left. You have fans who adore you. Fans that worship the ground you walk on. Fans that would simply not allow you to never release a piece of music again. And even in the unlikely situation that you lose the music industry entirely, you will still have plenty. But me? Breaking this contract means I lose everything I've ever worked for. I lose my entire future." Kelsey's eyes pleaded with Niall to read between the lines, to connect the dots to what exactly her deal with the devil included.

"So that's it then? You just want to forget this weekend ever happened? Don't you think it was fate that we would even be in the same place at the same time again? I can't let you do this Kelsey, we have to do something."

"What Niall? What is this 'something' that we are going to do?" Kelsey said with frustration. "This isn't even something that can be done at the spur of the moment."

"I don't know..." Niall shrugged, his face defeated.

"I love you Niall, I do," Kelsey whispered. "Just know that I've always done what I've done because I love you. Now I'm asking you to do the same- keep this to yourself. If you love me, you'll understand."

"I love you," Niall murmured. "But.."

"No more buts..." Kelsey smiled, reaching a hand up to brush the side of Niall's face. "Maybe our love was just meant to be at a distance."

She leaned over, placing a soft kiss on Niall's lips, then stood, stepping away from Niall's grasp and once again made her way away from Niall before he can say anything else. Or more accurately, before she could change her mind.

She'd already said far too much.

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