#if i have a wedding then the cost will be the cost of pizza for all the guests.

[giantkillerjack]

"Oh, Jack. You silly boi. You know that help at the top of the stairs is no help at all."

---

Art piece i may delete later about my parents offering money to me and my sisters to pay for either grad school (a thing I don't want and can't do with my disability) or my wedding (also a thing I don't need/want), but not for anything that would actually help me escape poverty and find stable housing and income.

Like, I recognize the privilege of being able to complain that my parents have offered me a bunch of money but in the wrong way.

But also if that money is on top of a flight of stairs that I can't climb (but my sisters can), then I haven't really been offered money, so much as I have watched money I need be placed somewhere I can't reach it. Which tbh feels worse than if it was never mentioned to me in the first place.

I was gonna send this art to them and i wrote this big long message to go with it, but then I decided to wait until my therapy session on Tuesday to talk it thru with her first, since I've literally never regretted doing that.

Besides, both of my parents are lawyers and right now they're providing me and my friends with a lot of free legal advice about this property we're trying to buy together, so I don't want to rock the boat currently.

I just wish I knew if I had access to that money as a poor person in need of stable housing and quality disability care, and I wish my parents weren't world-class hLepers who have a long and triggering history of engaging me in rigorous debate about the kind of help I should be allowed to receive from them as a disabled person.

Nothing like having to provide an argument that would hold up in court every time I'm sick and need help! Love that! Love that I can't even talk about money with them now without having invasive thoughts about it for days to come due to past incidences in which this repeated behavior of theirs literally endangered my life!!

Not like I need that mental capacity for working on the largest and most exciting opportunity of my life that also happens to line up with my hopes and dreams for the future!! It's fine!! What do I even need mental capacity for anyway?????

This wouldn't even be the first time this little Distrust Fund has caused problems for my relationship with my parents. They are very opposed to that money being used to help my disability and it has caused PROBLEMS for us that we have never quite recovered from.

It's just difficult to be reminded that although our relationship has gotten better (mostly thanks to me setting boundaries), that doesn't mean they now actually believe what I need for my disability when I tell them.

They really do love me, and they have only ever acted with the best of intentions . But good intentions cease to matter when the impact is harmful and repeated. And they have proven to be repeatedly incapable of providing non-ableist support for me again and again and again. They've even genuinely tried to learn; and sometimes it really seems like my mom has made progress with her therapist (who is disabled), but who knows when I can so jarringly be reminded of how quickly that toxic ableist thinking can show its ugly face.

It's so clear to me and they don't even know it's there.

It feels like I'm in a horror movie when I try to get them to understand their own ableism, and that is a good good sign that I may want to consider an approach that minimizes my mental damage instead. Even if it means I don't get their stupid, deeply-conditional-and-yet-the-conditions-are-SO-vague-and-they-won't-admit-it money.

[lijoue]

ITALIA WORLD MOD PACK

Hello hello,

I've been working hard to create something really good to share with you. This is my most ambitious release yet, so I hope it was worth the wait!

ITALIA is a custom cc 'game pack' that transforms Tartosa into a beautiful Italian-inspired destination! Tartosa is my favourite world in the game, but I feel like it never gets any love because everyone hates My Wedding Stories. I want to help you fall in love with the beauty of Tartosa! If you don't have My Wedding Stories, there's plenty of base-game friendly items for you as well. There is A LOT of stuff in this pack (around 125 items).

Download Link & More Details on Patreon (early Access)

CORE FEATURES

Tartosa world override with new world lighting, buildings, trees, streetlights, functional objects, marketstalls, and decor.

New food & drinks (gelato, pasta, pizza, wine, and coffee!)

New custom-tuned functional objects to elevate your gameplay.

NEW FUNCTIONAL OBJECTS (custom tuning)

Picnic Blanket | Sit, eat, gaze at the sky, and even bathe in the moonlight. *DLC interactions require their respective packs (Lovestruck, Life & Death)

Beach Bathroom | Using this outdoor bathroom costs 1§ and restores hygiene & bladder without the uncomfy public bathroom buffs.

Beach Bag | Works like a dresser to change outfit on-the-go.

Cooler Bag | Stock with drinks & snacks. Functions like a picnic basket on blankets and picnic tables. Helps keep food fresh and fixes the picnic basket inventory to store up to 99 food and drink items.

Stovetop Moka Pot | Brew a quick pot of espresso from the countertop or stovetop.

Souvenir Stand | Purchase from a curated selection of art & objects. Includes items that are difficult to obtain in-game, as well as cc from two of my favourite creators bbygyal 123andPierisim. CC items will only show up in the shop if you already have the files in your Mods folder, so please check out their work if you haven't already! Sims can also purchase wearable souvenir t-shirts and baseball caps.

Gelato Stand | Purchase gelato, ice cream, and drinks.

Beach Stand | Purchase beach stuff, drinks, snacks, and souvenirs.

Coffee Stand | Purchase coffee and snacks

Park Fountain | Toss a coin in the fountain and have a seat. The XL version spawns butterflies.

Drinking Fountain | Wash hands or grab a drink of water with the infinitely refillable water bottle.

Nectar Bottle | Pour a glass of nectar. Includes 7 new nectar drinks and new custom buffs. Also includes in-game nectars from Horse Ranch, Dine Out, Bistro etc.

Classic Pool Float | Please download my mod Better Pool Floats for optimal experience.

Restaurant | Call a waiter to serve a curated menu of food & drinks. Sims in a rush can also order to-go (without a waiter).

NEW FOOD & DRINKS 

Nectar: Vigna Bianco, Sparkling Luminoso Bianco, Sparkling Luminoso Rosé, Rosa D'Amorosa, Amanti del Rosso, The Devil's Nectar, Bianco Spritz

Gelato: Pistachio, Pesca, Fragola, Bacio, Fior di Latte, Vanille, Caffè, Limoncello

Pasta: Carbonara, Spicy Carbonara, Spaghetti Alle Vongole, Cacio e Pepe, Spaghetti Marinara, Shrimp Spaghetti Marinara, Spaghetti Aglio e Olio

Snacks: Margherita Pizza, White Funghi Pizza, Fruit & Cheese Charcuterie Board

Cooler Drinks: Bottled Water, Aranciata Soda, Lemon Soda, Mojito Soda, Barbet Light Wave, Barbet Wild Card, Barbet Love Bite

Espresso: Caffe Latte, Cappuccino, Italian Hot Chocolate, Mocha, Macchiato, Americano

Download Link & More Details on Patreon (early Access)

[pierregazly]

1+ 2 = ...4? ꨄ pierre gasly smau

pierre gasly x wife!russell!reader

warnings: pregnancy, mentions of twins, george having a meltdown

in which pierre put his tripod to use and caused two major outcomes, george has a meltdown, and all the fans just want to know what's going on?

ynrussell

liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, and 23,407 others

tagged pierregasly

ynrussell joyeux anniversaire mon amour. three years ago today i married the love of my life and became the official mrs. gasly, so excited to give you your present tonight 🫶🏻

view all 220 comments

username omg babes post the present!!! let us all be jealous

username happy anniversary mom and dad

charles_leclerc 🥳💗

username feel like it was just yesterday that i was jealous out of my mind about their wedding... still jealous tho

pierregasly joyeux anniversaire ma chère, i am the luckiest man in the world

pierregasly can't wait to give your your own present tonight

pierregasly it rhymes with tierod

username TRIPOD PIERRE

username im SCREAMING send this man right to PRISON

georgerussell63 god every time i see anything to do with you two i have to bleach my bloody eyes. happy anniversary you two, im disgusted.

username poor george, him and carmen are so tame compared to these two... i love the polar opposite sibling trope

ynrussell has posted a story

liked by pierregasly, georgerussell63, and others

replies

pierregasly i hope the pizza was good ma chérie, and hope it satisfied the little bean's cravings

ynrussell it was delicious... but we kind of want chocolate now too :(

pierregasly ill check ubereats and see what i can do

ynrussell mine and the bean's saviour 🫶🏻

pierregasly

liked by ynrussell, charles_leclerc, alpinef1team, and 209,444 others

tagged alpinef1team

pierregasly unfortunately not the finish we would have liked, the 15 second penalty cost us significantly and i apologize to my team and all our fans for it. will come back bigger and better next time 💪 now time to go and spend some well deserved time off with my family

view all 3,309 comments

username thank you for pushing through and giving us an awesome race to watch pierre!

username loved your helmet this weekend pierre!

username sad that mother ynrussell wasn't here this weekend, but happy to see her in the likes

username 'well deserved time off with my family' do we think that's alluding to something else????

username girl he's obviously talking about his wife and his family??? like what

username ummm sorry he almost always says 'my loved ones' gotta push the pregnancy rumour agenda some more

ynrussell we're all so proud of you pear 🫶🏻 the track limits and penalties are bullshit and i'll be sending a strongly worded letter to whoever costs you anything good

liked by charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, and others

pierregasly 😂😭🤍

username who is 'we're all' who is the plural that she's referring to omg

username i'm telling y'all... mother is becoming a real mother idc what any of y'all say

pierregasly has posted a story

liked by ynrussell, georgerussell63, and others

ynrussell omf make sure you get extra cheesecake... and extra elcairs, and a few brownies... maybe get a few of everything??? the bean's want them!!!!

pierregasly well if the bean's want them....

username this SCREAMS my wife is pregnant and sent me on a late night snack run omf

username tell us your secret!!!!

ynrussell

liked by pierregasly, georgerussell63, carmenmmundt, and 46,578 others

tagged pierregasly

ynrussell sorry just have to appreciate how incredibly sexy it is seeing my super sexy amazing husband with kids!!! like how lucky am i!!! can't wait til' you're holding our future babies (my ovaries are exploding, i am crying, it's going to be a long day)

view all 398 comments

username girl this seems a little feral idk

georgerussell63 this is certifiably disgusting. please grow up.

username you know who would post something like this??? a wife expecting a baby who is getting more excited about that baby seeing her husband with kids

username seems legit idk

pierregasly is this your nice way of asking me to pickup more eclairs on the way home?

ynrussell cinnamon buns too?? please?? je t'aime

pierregasly can't wait to hold our future bean's too ma chérie

username pierre as a dad is going to be so sexy, ynrussell is so right??? those babies are going to be beautiful omf

ynrussell and pierregasly

liked by charles_leclerc, carmenmmundt, georgerussell63, and 566,493 others

pierregasly october 2024 / gasly thing 1 and gasly thing 2 🐣🚼

view all 4,533 comments

ynrussell omg i'm pregnant???? SURPRISE

ynrussell maman is begging for them to come sooner, her poor back.

username AH I KNEW IT. I CALLED IT. MY HEART.

username THING 1 AND THING 2 AHHHHH

username pierre is gonna be a girl dad AND a boy dad?????? we're so blessed

georgerussell63 excuse me????

georgerussell63 you knocked my sister up????

georgerussell63 i told you to stay away from her??? this is outrageous i am disgusted

pierregasly sorry, tripod's work well.

ynrussell pierre delete this comment rn, i swear to god.

georgerussell63 (i am so excited to meet my baby niece and baby nephew. uncle georgie loves you both so much)

lewishamilton congratulations! roscoe is so excited 🤍

charles_leclerc uncle cha reporting for duty 🫡 congratulations, you two.

georgerussell63 i'd like to emphasize i'm still having a meltdown from when you casually gave me a bottle of gin to announce this. gasly genes should not be casually mixed like this.

username i dont think anyone understands the joy im feeling??? im honoured to be alive to see this

username they're gonna be such amazing parents im literally ????? so excited??????

carmenmmundt has posted a story

liked by ynrussell, pierregasly, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

replies

ynrussell thank you for the beautiful baby shower, auntie carmen already has spot number 1 🫶🏻

username omg omg omg omg

username this is SO CUTE

ynrussell has posted a story

liked by pierregasly, carmenmmundt, georgerussell63, and others

replies

username girl u look like ur about to pop (lovingly)

pierregasly my beautiful wife

ynrussell i don't feel very beautiful right now. i feel huge and tired and exhausted.

pierregasly still the most beautiful woman in the world

ynrussell

liked by pierregasly, alexandrasaintmleux, georgerussell63, and 56,439 others

ynrussell things are getting very, very real (not real enough for my back to not hurt, thing 1 and 2 you both are killing me)

view all 165 comments

username this aesthetic is so CUTE (that room is fucking beautiful i want a house tour????)

username they're literally due in like less than 2 months???? pierre is gonna be a dad that soon???? praying for u ynrussell

charles_leclerc im personally demanding compensation for the bruises i have from putting the nursery together

ynrussell shut up cha, you literally offered and begged to be involved

pierregasly yeah shut up cha

alexandrasaintmleux can't wait to see my art piece up in the bébé's room 🫶🏻

ynrussell knew i could always count on you angel

username im so invested in this pregnancy none of you even understand

username starting a poll asap on the babies names omf

ynrussell and pierregasly

liked by charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, roscoelovescoco, and 675,487 others

ynrussell 2024.10.16 / welcome to the world my precious théodore and éloïse. maman and papa love you so much.

view all 5,640 comments

username omg congratulations!!! such beautiful names.

username they share a birthday with charles im crying

lewishamilton congratulations! so beautiful, you are a rockstar ynrussell

charles_leclerc truly the best birthday present i could've asked for. ellie and théo should be so proud of their maman.

pierregasly the happiest day of my life, given to me by the most important woman in my life. thank you for blessing me.

username again i am so invested in this. i am so happy for these two, they're going to be incredible parents.

alpinef1team welcome to the family baby éloïse and baby théodore!

mercedesamg welcome to the family x2

username oh girl the racing teams are gonna FIGHT over these two just you wait

and there she is! after weeks of gasly!twin asks, i finally decided it was time to bring them to life in the realest way i could. i hope you all loved this as much as i loved writing it. thank you to everyone for all the incredible inspiration, and for continuing my obsession.

taglist

@leclercdream @myescapefromthislife @princessria127 @iloveyou3000morgan @love4lando @asfaraslifegets @decseptapril @somanyfandomsbruh @fangirl125reader @imagandom @motorsp0rt @jspitwall @glitterf1 @christianpulisic10 @carlandonorri-s @smoothopz @eugene-emt-roe @epitios @myloverjk-blog @glow-ish @goldenmclaren @mercunty @success78 @nicolereinara

if you're missing from the taglist, pls dont hesitate to send me a message!!

[graveyardlifeguard]

Survivors Part 1

Summary: Occurs during the events of Season 4x13 and Season 4x14.

*This is my first attempt at writing after many, many years so please go easy on me*

Warnings: Shooting, Injury, Blood

Strictly Angst with a teeny tiny bit of Fluff

Eddie Diaz x Paramedic! Reader

The shift started out as normal as it usually did. I mean, as normal as it could for the 118. I had picked up an extra night shift to try and help C Shift with a staffing issue they were currently having. Eddie, my fiancée, had already gone home for the night after our regular shift. As much as I would have loved to go home with him, I knew the extra money would be nice to have for the costs of planning a wedding.

I had only been at work for 3 hours, but I was already exhausted after having a cardiac arrest and a car flip over on the highway. Back-to-back. Shutting the back doors of the ambulance after restocking, I made my way upstairs to the kitchen area to grab a snack. It was currently 10pm and everyone else was in bed for the night. Right after grabbing a left-over slice of pizza out of the fridge, the bell and pager went off once again for a sick call at a nearby apartment complex.

My partner for the night, Alicia, quickly made her way out of the dorm rooms before shuffling towards the truck.

"Is there no such thing as a break?!" She yells from the passenger side of the truck.

I laugh as I move down the stairs towards the driver's side.

"What does the nice, bustiling city have for us this time?" I ask as Alicia looks over the computer, that is still updating with notes from the caller.

I start the truck up and we exit the station driving down the still busy city roads. Alicia lets me know that were going to The Regal Point Apartments for a 13-year-old male complaining of not feeling well. His mom called, concerned that her son's condition was deteriorating.

Pulling up to the apartment complex, Alicia grabs the medical bag while I grab the LifePak monitor. Luckily, this apartment complex has an elevator, so we don't have to trudge our way up four flights of stairs. Once at the correct apartment, the patient's mother, who introduces herself as Sheila. Alicia and I introduce ourselves with Sheila pointing us towards her son's bedroom. While walking towards his bedroom she begins to talk to us about his medical history.

"His name is Charlie, he's 13-years-old. He has an Auto-Immune disorder that forces him to stay inside all the time. The only times he gets to leave the house are to go to one of his many doctors' appointments."

Entering Charlie's room, Alicia once again introduces us and asks if she can check his vital signs. He agrees with Alicia beginning to check his blood pressure. Even in the small glow from his bedside lamp, I can see that Charlie looks sick. He appears pale with dark bags sitting underneath his eyes. Overall, he looks exhausted.

After checking all of his vital signs and talking to Sheila and Charlie more, I had a weird feeling start to form in my stomach. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but something just did not feel right. The way that his mom seemed evasive with his full diagnosis and couldn't remember his medications, something just seemed...wrong. When Alicia asked the mom about us taking him to the hospital, she quickly stated that she does not believe that he needs to go to the hospital due to him having a weak immune system.

"Ma'am we understand your concerns, but we always recommend people go to the hospital to get checked out. Especially when they are as sick as Charlie is." I try once again.

Alicia was packing up the bag as Sheila repeats that she does not want Charlie to go. "I'll call his primary care doctor in the morning and see if they will see him." She states with a kind smile on her face.

The odd feeling again returns before we exit the house. Getting back in the truck, I keep the uneasy feeling to myself as Alicia writes the refusal report. I wait for her to finish typing before asking her.

"Did that seem odd to you?"

"What do you mean?" she asks, still looking over the report.

"Just the story of his diagnosis and things like that. She just seemed to have a lot of empty answers." I reply back.

"I didn't really get a weird feeling, but I also was talking more to Charlie than I was to the mom." She answers again.

"Something just seems off to me. Maybe I am just thinking too far into it." I state. I mean, it is late, the mom is probably tired after spending the day taking care of her son. That's what we will have to go with for now as Dispatch alerts us to another call we're needed on. 

————

"How come you don't make this kind of breakfast for me when we're at home?" Eddie states as he comes bouncing into the kitchen. He's in full uniform which makes it hard for me to not turn around and admire him. I had always loved a man in uniform but there was just something about him in one that made it twenty times better.

"I only cook when I am here because if I start cooking at home, that means you'll expect it, and we can't have that." I reply to him.

He laughs before sneaking a quick kiss on my lips before lifting up my left hand and kissing my ring finger. Even though my engagement ring wasn't there, the little rubber one that replaced it on shift was still just as meaningful. Butterflies erupt in my heart at the small interaction.

Eddie coming to the 118 was the absolute best thing to ever happen to me. Before he arrived, I was a shy little Paramedic who just came to work to run calls and go home. My best friend Buck had been whining forever that I never went out and never spent any time living my life. Whatever that meant. Eddie being here brought out a whole new side of me that Buck says he had always been waiting to see. It was not just Eddie though; Christopher had been another missing piece in my life that I never knew I needed. It had been so easy to turn into a motherly figure for him. When he proposed, Eddie had made sure to include Christopher in it. Mostly because Christopher wouldn't allow him to not include him.

The station bell went off sharply, alerting everyone to a call. "I guess breakfast will just have to wait until later." I yell out downstairs to the crew as I shut off the stove and run downstairs. Hen and Chimney jump into the ambulance while I make my way to the Critical Care SUV. Right after getting engaged to Eddie, I had been promoted to a Critical Care Responder, aka Lieutenant. Which was a fancy way of saying that I had more responsibilities while riding by myself. I hop into the truck and make my way to the call behind the Fire truck and the Ambulance.

Arriving at the call, I let Captain Nash and his crew manage the situation. The best part about my new role, I had Chim and Hen underneath me, which meant they were more than capable of handling anything. I was more along the lines of helping hands when needed with these two. After realizing that I was not needed for this call and hearing another more critical call come out, I let everyone know I was leaving before hurrying on to the next call.

————

"Where did you disappear off to earlier?" I hear Eddie say from behind me.

I had just returned to the station after being gone for most of the day. I turn in my seat so I can fully see him. He's leaning against the door frame of my office with a small smile sitting on his face. As nice as it was to work together, it seemed almost impossible most of the time to actually see him. I smile up at him as he walks over and sits on the corner of my desk.

"I couldn't seem to find my way back here today. Everyone needed something at some point." I state as I lean forward to make some sort of physical contact with him, granted it was just my elbow touching his knee, but hey, it was something.

"I'm tired of everyone needing my girl today. I know you're great and all but damn." I laugh and shake my head at his compliment. He knew that calling me "his girl" was a sure-fire way to my heart. 

"Listen, if you need me while you're out there, all you have to do is call me. That's what everyone else likes to do!" I remind him with a smile on my face.

He smiles back at me, and it is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. We're stuck like that for a moment, just smiling at each other alone in my office.

Eddie glances between me and the still open office door before pulling me to stand in front of him. Before I can ask him what he's doing, his lips are on mine like he hasn't kissed me in months. I quickly return the kiss and allow myself to enjoy the mental break. Before it can get too heavy, Eddie pulls away but just far enough away that our foreheads are still touching. We are both smiling like cheshire cats, and I don't think anything could be better than this. I pull back further and smile up at him.

"Not that I didn't enjoy that, what was that for?" I ask, still smiling. He just stares down at me before giving me a quick kiss on the cheek.

"I just missed my girl. That's all." Before I can respond to him, the station bell goes off once more alerting Eddie to another call. His head falls backwards with a groan escaping his mouth. I snort at his dramatics and place a kiss on his lips before pulling him out of the office. "Where are you going? You didn't get added to this." He asks as we walk towards the bay.

"I might as well grab a drink before I dive back into my paperwork." I tell him.

As we enter the bay and begin to separate, I feel a light smack on butt. The surprise of it caught me off guard causing me to lightly jump and yell out. I can hear Eddie laughing as he runs off towards the truck to leave. "I love you!" He yells out before hopping in the back. Eddie Diaz was going to be the death of me.

[qierxing]

A/N: For Trey's bday and also my brain can't stop thinking about this. I gotta go crazy(mera i'm stealing your naming of magicord thank u)

Prologue | Sex Doll! AU | Yan! Trey Clover x Reader TW/CW: Reader is a NEET, self harm idealization, bad coping mechanisms

You're attending your brother's wedding, right?

The text is simple and innocuous. It’s a perfectly reasonable question. There's no hidden sub context that your mother would leave in such a sentence. Yet it sends cold sweat running down your back as you begin to bite your nails anxiously. 

Weddings meant people. People meant socializing and having to answer questions such as “So what are you up to these days?” or “Do you have a partner?” all while smiling and trying not to rip your own skin off.

You end up gnawing off a chunk of your nail off subconsciously, still stuck on the bright screen boasting the text message. Your thumb hovers over the textbox, unsure of what to even reply with that wasn’t a solid “hell no”. It wasn’t your brother or anything, and it would probably be nice seeing him again, but not when there’s the added pressure of other people and even worse, the subtle judgment that would definitely ensue at seeing your current form.

Sighing, you switch off your phone. You’ll come back to it later. Darkness claims your room again, but your sight’s adjusted well enough that you manage to avoid stepping on the various candy wrappers and instant noodle cartons littered around the floor. Pushing past the trash bags in the kitchen, you open your fridge and curse internally. Right. You ate the last frozen pizza from your stash. And of course, there’s nothing in your fridge besides milk.

You’ve no energy to go walking to the grocery store, so you lumber back to your room like a zombie, picking up your phone again and switching the tab to the maps to look at take out places. A Magicord message notification banner comes up, distracting you temporarily from debating which takeout place would be the cheapest to get delivery from. 

{21:37}: ohhh my seven, look at what they release!d!! [image attachment]

The image boasts a handsome man with sharp green eyes and long curved horns. He’s smirking as he brandishes a large staff at the viewer. A familiar gothic logo is splayed next to the figure. You roll your eyes. Of course your friend is going crazy over the newest Twisted Wonderland android lineup. She’s been going on and on about how their models are the hottest designs around and how cool they were. She even has several around (Sea Witch knows how much it cost) if you remembered correctly.

{21:38}: whos that lol

{21:38}: COME ON ISN’T HE HOT

{21:39}: it’s literally a robot what

{21:39}: 🙄 can’t even appreciate hot looking robots smh

You huff a tired laugh at the enthusiasm she has, even at a relatively late hour. Still though, you’re much too drained and worried to indulge in her endless fangirling.

{21:41}: i’ll start appreciating robots if it means i don’t have to deal with my brother’s wedding

Just as you settle on a fast food place for takeout, another message banner pops up and makes your eyes blink and widen.

{21:45}: wait bet?

Oh Seven–

{21:46}: bruh. dont you dare do smth stupid

{21:47}: >:3c

{21:48}: i swear to the seven what r u doing

{21:51}: dw bout it

You squint at your messages with suspicion before deciding it wasn’t worth your time to play mind games with her. A notification pops up about your delivery and estimation time for your food and you decide to take a well needed shower before the poor unfortunate soul could come face to face with you. 

When you finally leave the bathroom feeling somewhat better and refreshed, a knock echoes on your apartment door. Great timing. When you open the door, however, it’s not a person holding a plastic bag that greets you, but a man with a huge box next to him. Your mouth opens and closes silently in confusion as the man doesn’t even blink as he holds out a clipboard for you.

“Signature, please.” He blandly says, as if you weren’t standing there gaping at him with baggy eyes with dripping hair.

“I-I, uh, I didn’t order anything?” You try to reassure yourself that the delivery man messed up your neighbor’s order, calming the flaring nerves as best you can before your brain starts shutting down. “I think you got the wrong place.”

The man purses his lips and checks the clipboard. “Are you [First] [Last]?” 

“Oh, uh, yes?” You’re taken aback. Did you order something off of Sam’s Shop and forget about it? 

“Then it’s for you. Signature, please. I need confirmation you received the item.” The man looks bored out of his mind and you’re not willing to make a bigger nuisance of yourself than necesscary, so you hastily take the pen and sign your name in a barely legible scrawl. The man drones an insincere thank you out before turning on his heel and leaving right away, leaving you with a huge box that will no doubt break your back if you tried to pick it up.

After much sweat and puffing, you manage to scoot the box into your apartment hallway, before you give up and decide that was enough. Picking up your phone again, several notifications show up on your lock screen.

[Your food delivery is delayed by: 10 minutes]

{22:30}: teehee, enjoy the free gift UwU

{22:31}: and no its not the new malleus guy. i gotchu smth u would like

{22:32}: YOUR WELCOME

You have half a mind to call her and start yelling her ears off, but that takes energy and effort that you’re not willing to afford right now. So you rub the bridge of your nose and take deep breaths in and out, and remind yourself you can’t afford to be in jail for a murder.

Okay. It seems that your friend got ahead of herself and got you an android that you probably will hate and even worse, would be expensive as hell to maintain. That’s fine. This is fine. You could probably just return the box or something. 

Still, curiosity burns in you at what lays inside the package. You’re well aware that Twisted Wonderland has a variety of models, so what did your friend even get you? Couldn’t be a RSA model, they were often sold out and when they were in stock, it was always limited. 

Ah, screw it. Throwing your inhibitions to the wind, you scour your drawers to find that dollar store razor you keep for situations like these and start tearing into the tape and cardboard. Finally managing to clear the tape, you open up the top of the cardboard box and your eyes widen at the contents.

[coffeecatsandhealth]

12/17/24

I made it to another exercise class today. My reward after salad is going to be stuffed crust pizza.🍕

My fiance wants us to do 4 classes a week which feels a little excessive to me, but I guess I should give it a try because I haven't been making a heck of a lot of progress in the last several months.

I was emotional today because my fiance and I made the determination that we should have a courthouse wedding instead of the bigger wedding like we had originally planned on doing because of finances. Luckily, the only thing we booked so far was the venue, and that was just the deposit, so we aren't losing that much money. It hurts a bit, but I am coming to peace with it. It's a smarter financial decision because I have a lot of debt I need to pay off. I guess the good thing is that we'll at least have a really kickass honeymoon because of the concerts we're going to, so that's something. It broke my heart a little to tell family and friends. Everyone was understanding. The other thing i will allow myself to splurge on a little will be my wedding dress. My plan is to keep the cost of the dress under $1000, but I want to get something that I like that I'll get well tailored that makes me feel pretty. It's more about the marriage than the wedding. It's a little frustrating, though, because we already put off getting married due to finances, and it's stupid. We could have been married by now, but we felt the push to have a bigger wedding partially due to pressure from family and also because I really wanted to have my friends there. Now it's mostly going to be family, and I don't know which friends, if any, are going to be invited because I'm afraid of making people feel like I'm picking favorites. Im not really sure what to do. I cried earlier because I had gotten my hopes up. I didn't think we could afford a bigger wedding, but I got it in my head that we could do it. Technically, we could do it and pull it off, but we shouldn't. It's just not the financially smart thing to do with the way money is right now. I know it'll all be OK in the end, but it's a little fresh still. I don't know what to do in terms of the minimalist guest list. I don't want to leave people out, but I'll have to.

We've decided not to tell extended family until after Christmas so we don't have to deal with that headache until after the holidays. They're not helping pay for our wedding. Its all coming out of our pockets. Its not like how it was with his aunts who had their parents pay for their weddings. 🫠🙃 Not their business. Even though I know people will have stupid things to say. Oh the joy of stupid family drama crap.

[whinlatter]

i love beasts with my whole soul, it's so heartfelt and intelligently written. love reading the author's notes afterwards, love everything about it. do you have any headcanons about harry and the dursleys maybe years later, if they've reconnected or if harry forgave them?

ok firstly you're a star and it's very important that you know that. thank you so so much for reading and enjoying my fic and my inane author's notes you absolute legend

i fear my headcanons on the dursleys are all a bit boilerplate and boring! i'm a big fan of the widely accepted idea of harry and dudley having a sort of polite but sort of nice rapprochement of sorts as adults that dudley initiates and harry sort of goes along with, a bit baffled, for dudley's sake. i quite like the reunion happening at the burrow partly because i like the idea of dudley a) sat in the weasleys' garden feeling clever for the first time in his life explaining to arthur the concept of a sit-on lawnmower and b) meeting ginny and having to wrap his head around the concept of his flop cousin having pulled an absolute baddie.

while i don't think dudley would ever cut himself off or distance himself from his parents (i don't think he has the insight or depth to grasp why he might need to), i like the idea of dudley absorbing enough of dedalus diggle's relentless harry stan content for a year to be able to grasp that harry was actually good vibes and that what his parents did to his cousin during their childhoods was, on some level, wrong. (dedalus and dudley - what a double act. that unlikely duo stayed in touch for the rest of their lives, meeting up every few months at the pizza express in woking for a catch-up. dudley 100% stuck him on the family table at his wedding and gave a vernon a stroke. dudley also fancied hestia that year they were in hiding but unlike dedalus she ran a mile from the dursleys as soon as the war was done and she didn't have to see those tory clowns ever again. harry jokingly-not-jokingly tried to give her his order of merlin for her service.)

i don't think harry ever forgives or has any contact with vernon and petunia again. he does however enjoy the news, relayed through dudley, that grunnings went bust due to catastrophic fiscal mismanagement during the 2008 financial crisis, costing vernon his pension, and that petunia's rose garden was ripped to shreds by piers polkiss' XL bully.

[kristannafever]

Second Chances - 9

Kristanna Modern AU Rated: Explicit WC: 2021

Chapter Index

----------------

“This is happening!” Anna squealed. 

Kristoff laughed.  “It is!”

“I can’t wait,” she said, hugging him around the neck and pulling him in for a kiss.

He basked in the warmth of her kiss and the glow of her happiness.  It had only taken about two weeks for them to plan the entire wedding, and in one short month, they were going to be wed.

“And I’m glad that works for our sisters to take time off to fly home,” she said, pulling out of his embrace and going back to her laptop where she had just finished booking the venue. 

Kristoff was too.  It was a worry when they brought it up with their sisters that they would find work too demanding for the short time frame, but as luck would have it, they were both able to make the trip and take an extra couple of days beforehand to help them prepare. 

-----

They picked a Ranchers Hall in a small rural town about a half hour outside of the city.   It was perfect for Anna’s vision of a country winter wedding.  And while the place was rather small, it didn’t matter since the only people they were inviting were family and only the closest of friends.  All in all, about forty guests.

His sister and Anna’s sister were going to serve as the best person and maid of honor, and it was decided by Kristoff (and greatly appreciated by Anna) that his parents were going to walk with both him and then Anna down the aisle.  As soon as the ceremony was complete, they were going to do some family photos outside while the venue changed the rows of chairs out for tables and started the bar and serving guests.

The flowers Anna chose were white roses because they symbolized the purity of their love and the new beginnings they were having at life with each other. 

The meal they decided on was either prime rib or salmon as per the guest’s choice, and the caterer they had booked also offered appetizers for the cocktail hour and late-night pizza and popcorn for inebriated party goers.  Kristoff thought it would be a good idea to personally pay for the pre-dinner drinks and then charge a toonie bar afterward and to offer pre-paid cab vouchers to anyone who didn’t want to stay in the town’s small hotel so there was no worry of anyone drinking and driving.

Anna had argued briefly with him about the cost of the wedding as he was handling it all, which turned into a rather deep conversation about how he’d lived with his ex.  He told Anna the sad truth that they never really did anything.  They never even went on a vacation together.  Not that he didn’t want to.  It was all his ex.  She had a group of friends from high school she was still extremely close with, and her vacation time was spent solely with them.  At the beginning he didn’t mind too much, thinking it would be nice to have those quiet weeks here and there to himself, then time went on and when he’d brought up her using her time to go somewhere with him, her reaction had been reluctance and confusion; since they lived together already, why would she give up these trips with her friends to spent more time with him.   So she kept taking vacations with her group and Kristoff saved a ton of money over the years for not going anywhere. 

Upon hearing about this, Anna’s face went deep scarlet and she sat there with her teeth clenched frowning at him.

“You know,” she started, “I have a lot of things in my mind that I could say about that, that I want to say about that, then I think of where we are now, how I don’t want to spend another second of my life without you by my side, and I realize that it doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Kristoff shook his head.  “Nope.”

Anna sighed, letting go of her anger.  “I will never not appreciate the second chance at love that I got to have with you, Kristoff.  You are my soulmate and I love you more than anything.”

“I love you too.”  He leaned in and kissed her, then pulled his head back and arched an eyebrow.  “That got you kinda mad eh?”

She nodded.  “A little, I guess.  I just don’t like hearing about you getting mistreated.”

“Well, same here, but you know that.”  He smirked at her.  “Care to take out any pent-up aggression on me?”

Anna’s eyes lit up.  “What do you have in mind?”

He put his mouth close to her ear.  “Why don’t you fuck my brains out?”

Anna shuddered.  “How would I do that exactly?”

He shrugged.  “Use your imagination.  My body is your playground.”

She smiled at him wickedly.  “Damn right it is.”  Then she kissed him forcefully.

They began to undress each other when Anna interrupted told him she wanted to go to the bedroom.  Shedding the remainder of their clothes as they went down the hall, they arrived in their room fully naked and attached at the lips. 

Kristoff pressed her down onto the bed, crawled over her, and began kissing his way down her body.  She smiled.  She would definitely have her way with his body as she saw fit, but she was not about to deny the pleasure that his mouth gave her. 

She curled her fingers into his impossibly soft hair, moaning loudly as his tongue lashed out against her clit.  Her back arched as he worked his mouth, and while she was enjoying the hell out of it, she grew impatient to have him.

When she gently tugged his hair, he stopped and looked up at her.  “I need you now,” she whispered.

“How do you want me?” he asked, sitting up.

“On your back.”

Anna moved and he took her place, laying down in the middle of the mattress.  She crawled over him and took a moment to kiss him passionately before she started. 

Moving slowly, she slid down onto his cock with a passionate and somewhat desperate moan.  It amazed her how she seemed to forget in between the moments they were not making love how good it actually felt to have him inside of her.  There was nothing in the world she could compare it with. 

She moved against him, already so close from his mouth, it didn’t take long before Anna felt the pull towards letting go.  Only, this time, she stopped, and her arousal pulsed briefly before quieting down. 

“Fuck, you have no idea how much that makes me crazy,” Kristoff muttered as he caressed her hips.   

She looked down at his face, careful not to move her hips just yet.  “Yeah?”

He nodded slowly.  “It’s…” He let out a long breath.  “It just feels incredible.  Do it again.”

Anna gave him a wicked smile.  “You read my mind.”

She began to move herself against him, slowly at first, then picking up her pace a bit until that feeling came back.  She stopped again, just one more movement away from going too far, and her center quivered against his cock.

“Fuck…” he said slowly. 

Anna held stark still.  If she moved right then, she was going to come and she didn’t want to just yet.  She waited until her arousal died down, then finally relaxed her body against him. 

“I have to be honest, Anna,” Kristoff said, his hands massaging her thighs, “I don’t think I will be able to last you doing that again.”

She smiled at him.  “Does you in that much, huh?”

“You have no idea,” he mumbled, curling his hands around her back and pulling her down for a kiss. 

Anna gave in to his lips, kissing him back and starting to move herself against him.  She went slow this time, allowing herself to feel every second of her renewed growing arousal.  She pulled back from his lips and braced her hands on his chest as she got closer.  She had never felt such a deep need for an orgasm in all her life.

Kristoff’s grip was tightening on her hips and she knew he was going to come as soon as she did.  Anna found that edge again, only this time she did not deny herself.  She gasped as it got closer, and then a second later she was crying out with sweet relief.

Kristoff cried out softly with her, holding her firmly to him as they climaxed together.  It felt amazing to Anna to be able to ride out her orgasm with his cock pulsing powerfully within her.  It was basically mind-melting pleasure.  It was no wonder she was hooked on it like a drug.  A drug she was so thoroughly addicted to, that she knew they would have sex at least one more time before the end of the day. 

Or maybe two or three.  There seemed to be no way to satiate their hunger for one another.

~   ~   ~   ~   ~

Their wedding day was stunningly perfect.

Everything went according to plan and the only hiccup of the entire day was when Anna realized she accidently left her precious jewellery – the pieces she got back from her shitty ex – at home.  It was rectified shortly by Kristoff’s parents driving into the city to fetch them while the wedding party got ready.

What followed was flawless.

At the end of the night, with only a few guests left snacking on the pizza and the popcorn and talking in groups, Anna looked over at Kristoff, the happy and slightly drunk smile on his face, and felt her heart nearly explode with love. 

He was talking to Chester and his parents and laughing about something.  Anna could not take her eyes off of him; the most stunning man on the face of the planet in his pressed suit pants and white button down with the tie gone, top buttons undone, and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows.  His hair was mussed from dancing all night, his brown eyes shinning so brightly with life, his smirk of a smile on full display.  Truly, he was nothing but complete perfection in Anna’s eyes.  The sexiest man on the face of the planet.

He happened to glance her way, catching her staring at him, and he turned towards her and smiled.  They walked towards each other and straight into a tight embrace. 

“I can’t believe you are my wife,” he mused, kissing her neck. 

“God, I can’t believe you are my freaking husband!” Anna said back excitedly.  She pulled back to look at his face.  “And now we get to have a whole hell of a lot of fun making some children.”

“You bet your ass we do,” he breathed, and kissed her. 

-----

About an hour later, Kristoff was pushing himself into her. 

The foreplay was only a couple of sloppy drunk kisses before Anna was begging for him.  It didn’t matter to her, her only goal for the night was for him to come inside of her.  She’d had her IUD removed a couple of weeks ago and in the interim before the wedding, he’d worn protection.  Anna much preferred the feeling of his naked skin without the rubber barrier.    

“I can’t wait for tomorrow,” he said between kisses.  “I am so excited to take a real vacation.  With my wife!”

“Me too,” Anna said through a sigh.  “Oh, Kristoff, me too.”

He took the hint that she didn’t want to talk too much and pressed his pelvis flush with hers.  He knew exactly what he was doing, and even through all the drinks, Anna knew she was going to come and that he was holding out to join her. 

She let go of every thought besides the building feeling in her abdomen.  It grew until it reached the point where Anna’s mind went utterly blank, then she reached the edge and fell over it.  They moaned, holding each other through every strong contraction of their shared orgasm.

---

Previous Chapter

[theangryman]

the masculine urge to subsist on beer and challenge tier hot wings despite crippling GERD

don’t drink beer (especially not a dark creamy stout that makes love to your mouth like $10 chocolate bar or an IPA that’s so delicious and astringent it makes you feel clean)

don’t eat chocolate (especially not those fancy single origin ones, with complicated sour notes and maybe some raspberries or sea salt)

don’t eat spicy food (I just want to eat buckets of mango habanero wings with a vat of blue cheese without needing to file a change of address form to the W.C. is that really such a sin, God?)

don’t smoke (and that’s good advice in general, just sometimes I wanna puff and chill out for a couple hours instead of zooting)

avoid tomato/cream sauces (curry is love; curry is life. chili is also good. these are just good, “how do I make something tasty with what I have” things. Or pizza. Traditional foods with variation and history and access and love.)

avoid greasy foods (I ate Popeyes recently because their spicy tenders, mac, and a biscuit with a tall Diet Coke is pure bliss. The episode that followed was one where I was convinced that there was some form of internal damage. The fact that I have sat in my car in a parking lot debating whether I should order one may either indicate my pathological masochism or the absolute divinity of the food. I still argue evidence of the former does not disprove the later.)

I dated a nurse who said I’d be a terrible patient. He’s probably fair. But I want to eat samosas that melt in my mouth and enjoy feeling the different strains of hops and malts and subtle touches of a good beer. I want to go to the fair and eat a Turkey leg and nachos with that canned “cheese.”

if there’s any joy to be found in the cold uncaring universe, it’s a fucking stout aged in a bourbon barrel that cost like $20 and a cheese platter and crackers. It’s McDonald’s breakfast when you are hunger over and confused and hurt and just need a coffee and a biscuit to start your day. It’s wedding cake and handfuls of cheese crackers and candy with an energy drink during finals week.

[rachelkaser]

Stay Golden Sunday: Sophia's Wedding, Part 2

Sophia and Max decide to reopen their pizza-knish stand on Miami Beach. Dorothy picks up smoking to cope with the stress.

Picture It...

Dorothy sneaks into the garage vestibule from the kitchen with a pack of cigarettes. Just as she takes a puff, the smoke detector goes off and Rose and Blanche run in. Forestalling Blanche calling the fire department, Dorothy explains that she started smoking again. She's under a lot of stress, particularly after Sophia's marriage to Max. The couple return from their honeymoon at that moment and Dorothy asks the other Girls not to tell her.

It's for naught, as Sophia can immediately tell and lays into Dorothy for starting her bad habit again. She promises to quit again. Max and Sophia decide to get settled into their new place. There's just one problem -- they don't have a new place. At some light guilt-tripping from Sophia, the other Girls invite them to stay for a few days while they look for their own place. Dorothy struggles with her cravings.

Three weeks later, Dorothy is in the shower and tells Sophia she'll be out shortly. Without a word, Max enters, takes off his glasses and enters the shower, making Dorothy scream. The other Girls run in and there's more screaming. Blanche tells Sophia that living with Max and Sophia isn't working out and other Girls are uncomfortable. Sophia and Max (who refuses to put on a robe) agree to start looking for a new place immediately.

ROSE: Dorothy, I know what you're going through. I smoked for years. DOROTHY: You smoked? Rose, that's like finding out Lassie was an alcoholic. ROSE: Lassie was an alcoholic?! That explains why she always tipped to one side when she waved goodbye to Timmy.

Sophia and Max reconvene at the boardwalk, having not found a new place. They look out at the beach and reminisce about Sal's idea to open a pizza-knish stand on the boardwalk in Coney Island. A nearby saxophonist starts playing, and Max requests Sal's favorite: "It Had to Be You," and he and Sophia slow dance on the boardwalk. Later, the other Girls talk about Dorothy's cravings -- Rose reveals she also used to smoke, to Dorothy's surprise.

Max and Sophia return home and excitedly tell everyone they've found the perfect place and ask to show them. When they arrive on the boardwalk, the "place" is an old, boarded-up concession stand. They've decided to reopen their own business -- though they'll have to live at the house until it gets off the ground. Sometime later, they've got the stand almost ready to go, and the other Girls arrive. They warn Max and Sophia they'll get a cold if they overdo it, which Sophia scoffs at.

DOROTHY: I have to give you two credit. It looks like it's really gonna happen! MAX: Why shouldn't it happen? I know the pizza business like the back of my hand -- *look at his hand* I never noticed that before. What do you think it would cost to remove something like that?

Smash cut to Max and Sophia sitting on the couch with terrible colds. They're afraid that they won't be able to open in time for the weekend's beach festival and will lose their lease. The Girls cave and agree to help them out. That weekend, Blanche, Rose, and Dorothy are hard at work getting the pizza and knishes ready to go. Rose inadvertently triggers Dorothy's cigarette cravings. Unfortunately, they don't get the customers they're hoping for as no one seems to notice the stand.

Sophia arrives on a wave of better health to check on the stand, and the Girls tell her they haven't sold since everyone's in the water. Sophia decides to show them what's what: She looks towards the beach and starts yelling, "Shark!" The terrified beachgoers immediately surge onto the boardwalk and up to the pizza-knish stand. That night, they excitedly say they completely sold out, and the business is saved.

FIREMAN: Well, we've finally found the cause of the fire. DOROTHY: Take me away. Cuff me. FIREMAN: …well, I'd like to take you to dinner first. Then we could play the rest by ear.

Unfortunately, Dorothy gets a phone call and they rush back to the beach: The stand is now a smoking ruin. In tears, Dorothy confesses she snuck in a cigarette while locking up. Sophia forgives her, saying it was an accident. However, a fireman appears and says the real culprit was an electrical issue, and Blanche says insurance will help Sophia and Max rebuild. Sophia and Max? They both say, "Eh," to each other's surprise.

Sophia and Max both come to the same conclusion: The business isn't the same without Sal and Esther. Sophia sends the Girls home for cheesecake, and she and Max sit on their bench to talk. They decide they aren't in love with each other like they were with their late spouses, and are better off as friends. The Catholic Sophia suggests they separate, and Max decides to return to his family in Brooklyn. The saxophonist shows up and offers to play "It Had to Be You" again, and Sophia and Max dance for themselves, Sal, and Esther.

"I don't need a divorce on my record with St. Peter at spitting distance."

Max and Sophia once again put the "whirlwind" in "whirlwind romance," as they fast-track through their honeymoon, starting a business together, and finally a separation based on mutual agreement in a single episode. There's a lot going on here, even by Golden Girls standards. However, I think the saving grace of the episode is the continuity between the two-parter, and because I think it at least sort of addressed the big problem I had with the last one.

ROSE: I don't understand. SOPHIA: You should have that printed on a t-shirt.

The addition of Max, a man who invades the Girls' sanctuary (albeit by invitation) adds an extra ingredient of humor to the first half of the episode, as they can't get used to living with a man once more. Though when I've lived with men who weren't married to me, I admittedly didn't often have an issue with them joining me in the shower because they've mistaken me for their wife. I'm not sure why Max and Sophia stay with the Girls for three weeks before looking for a house, but it at least provides some conflict.

Max and Sophia's decision to try and reopen the pizza-knish stand that the Petrillos and Weinstocks originally opened on Coney Island is a pleasant nod to the first episode in the two-parter. It's nice to see an expansion on Sophia's life before she moved to Miami to be with her daughter, and to see what she and Sal got up to during their long life together in Brooklyn. I'm not sure if pizza and knishes would do as well on Miami Beach as they would on Coney Island, but I'm not going to pretend I know anything about the food industry.

BLANCHE: Why don't you want to hear about my dream? DOROTHY: Because it is always the same thing with you, Blanche: Sex, sex, sex. I am tired of hearing it. ROSE: Maybe that's because you're not getting any, Dorothy. DOROTHY: Do you want the pot again, Rose?

The issue I had with the first part of the episode was that it almost felt like Max forgot about his recently deceased wife (and Sophia's former bestie) Esther. At the end of this episode, Max admits he doesn't love Sophia as much as he did Esther, and that he prefers to remain friends with her after their separation. He also admits that he misses Brooklyn, where his family and grandkids live, which clears up a factor I hadn't even addressed about how Max must have felt moving to Miami.

As for this episode itself, the problem I have with the primary story about Max and Sophia is that it doesn't seem to flow naturally from part one to part two. At first, the conflict is that Sophia and Max need to find a new place to live, then the issue is them starting a business they might not be able to keep going. They feel almost like two different episodes smashed together -- especially since Sophia simply tells Blanche they'll both be staying in her house until the business gets off the ground, despite them moving out being the motivation to go to the boardwalk in the first place.

SOPHIA: You want a Lifesaver? MAX: What kind you got? SOPHIA: Peppermint. MAX: I don't like peppermint. I like butterscotch. You got butterscotch. SOPHIA: Does it say 7-11 across my forehead? I got peppermint!

Speaking of the boardwalk, it's one of the biggest non-house sets I've ever seen on this show -- fitting, given we spend over half the episode here. Not only do we have the full-size pizza-knish stand, but we also get to see a large section of the boardwalk, including other shops, which include a palm reader, a newspaper stand, and a candy shop. And mentioning sets, they've redesigned the Girls' only full-size bathroom yet again for the single-scene gag of Max getting into the shower with Dorothy.

There's not a B-plot in this episode per se -- Dorothy's smoking is directly related to the A-plot, and plays a role in its conclusion. She says one of the reasons she resumed the bad habit is because of her stress over Sophia's remarriage, and the married couple staying in the house with them probably doesn't help. We never actually learn if she did kick the habit. She didn't actually burn down the stand, so she may not quit out of guilt -- perhaps out of an abundance of caution over what could have happened? I have no idea.

BLANCHE: Well, how was the honeymoon? MAX: I tell you, that Disney World hotel was just wonderful. It had everything: Good service, delicious food, a beautiful room! ROSE: What did you think of the rides? MAX: . . . they got rides? SOPHIA: Don't worry about it. You had a good time and you never had to stand in line.

Another issue I have is that Blanche and Rose have far less to do in this episode than they did in the last one. They've managed to lose all interest in Elvis Presley over the course of a month, and have nothing to do in the whole episode except complain about Max, try to help Sophia, and give Dorothy motivation to kick her smoking habit. Rose manages to sneak in several inane St. Olaf Stories, while Blanche's main contribution seems to be as the voice of reason for everyone.

That said, the last scene where Dorothy gets her final resolve to quit smoking and is absolved of her guilt simultaneously, then Max and Sophia agree to part ways, is very sweet and a nice way of tying the whole thing together. Max going home to his family gives a clean break while not requiring Sophia to move back from a different location, and it's a sweet way of paying homage to the two's original spouses. Also, it's always nice to hear "It Had to Be You," especially played on a saxophone.

Episode rating: 🍰🍰🍰 (three cheesecake slices out of five)

Favorite part of the episode

Dorothy dispenses punishment to Rose.

[angry-pink-moose]

Granted there's a lot of crazy expensive things people will spend money on for weddings, but as someone who tried to do my wedding as thriftily as possible while still making it nice, if you want decent food for your guests that can easily be one of the biggest expenses. So in a way this $40 for pizza for a couple friends thing is almost hitting on how weddings can get up to 30k.

We didn't pay for the venue because it was my aunt's farm, where she had built a pizza oven years back and we utilized that. So already extremely lucky cost wise but it still cost over 10k after food and table/chair/tent rentals (it was outside) to host ~70 guests and just making sure they all got food and drink and a place to sit.

I think the "who would pay 30k for a wedding!!!!" thing sounds way more crazy until you actually try putting together an event where you need to feed a decent number of people and have a place that can comfortably fit/seat all of them and then you realize even trying to do the bare minimum adds up way too fast.

Of course this is why a lot of people elope or keep things super small which is totally valid.

seeing people casually talking about spending $30,000 on a wedding makes me feel a special kind of nauseous when every single person i know has to debate if $40 on ordering pizza is worth it

[dont-read-this-im-dead]

Personally, I think people who want to lose weight are too hard on themselves. Maybe they need to lose ten pounds to fit into that dress for aunt Mary's wedding, or maybe they just can't afford new clothes in a bigger size. But it all ends the same way.

Blood, tears, carnage. A night of binge watching "I Love Lucy" reruns and eating 3 gallons of ice cream.

Maybe you want to lose 30 pounds before your highschool reunion in 8 months. That's great! A good goal to have.

But don't make your new year's resolution "lose 30 pounds by August." Unless you have the patience of a saint, you're gonna be just like me and have one night stand and month long affairs with your dieting apps before the inevitable end.

Blood, tears, carnage. A promise to be a better person if only you didn't have to go through this torture.

Instead, make the resolution a step-by-step thing. Don't say, "Im going to lose 30 pounds!" Instead say, "I'm going to go to the gym more regularly."

Don't say, "I'm going to eat healthy!" Say I stead, "I'm going to eat more spinach."

Don't say, "I'm giving up carbs." Say, "Im switching to whole grains."

Go to the gym once a week, twice a month, whatever. As long as it's more often than you currently go, and there are regular intervals in between (as opposed to going once a week for 3 months, and then missing 2 months before going again), then you're already halfway there.

Buy some spinach every time you go grocery shopping. Eat it. In an omelette, in a smoothie, in a salad, on your pizza. You're already halfway there.

Buy whole grains. Yeah, they're more expensive sometimes, but do you know what? If you're worried about cost, then buy FEWER whole grains. If you can't afford it, don't buy it. Don't buy it, don't eat it. Voila. Fewer carbs. (This doesn't really work for sugar, because sweetener can be just as bad for you, so you've got like...zero alternatives. Good luck.) You're already halfway there!

And all the little things you slowly work on over the next 8 months may not lead up to 30 pounds exactly, but it can be close. And you'll be so proud of yourself for sticking to the smaller steps, you'll wonder why losing weight seemed so difficult all the time?

And you'll walk into that reunion looking hot, and people will drop their jaws and trip over their feet trying to get to you, and you can watch the scene unfold before you as you sit up on your royal throne.

Blood, tears, carnage.

[pandaraid-media]

How to Avoid the Cost of Video Editing

Hey there, fellow videographers! Let’s talk about video editing. We all know the feeling: getting lost in that magical world of trimming clips, adding transitions, and color grading until the sun comes up (or, more likely, the pizza delivery guy arrives). But here’s the thing: while that editing zone can be seriously rewarding, there’s a hidden cost lurking beneath the surface of every perfect cut.

Absolutely! This is a common challenge for new videographers I work with. One client, for instance, spent days crafting the perfect visual metaphor for a tech startup’s data encryption software. The final explainer video was incredibly slick, but by the time they crawled out of the editing cave, they’d missed a great opportunity to connect with a potential new client – all because they got lost in the editing marathon. Their video editing skills were top-notch, but their business development took a hit.

Here’s the truth: the cost of video editing goes far beyond the hours spent hunched over your keyboard. It can actually impact your business growth in some surprising ways. So, grab a coffee (or that leftover pizza!), ditch the guilt about that upcoming edit, and let’s explore how to shift your focus to build a sustainable, thriving videographer business.

The Hidden Costs: Why Video Editing Can Be a Double-Edged Sword

Okay, so picture this: you’re neck-deep in editing a stunning wedding video. Every cut feels perfect, the color grading is on point, and you know the happy couple will be over the moon. But while you’re crafting this masterpiece, a few things might be happening in the background that could be silently hindering your business growth.

The Lost Opportunity Trap:

Let’s face it, every hour you spend editing is an hour you’re not spending on something else, like reaching out to new clients or following up on leads. Think about it: that time could have been used to land a new project with a bigger budget, allowing you to invest in better equipment or hire an assistant (who can then help you edit faster!). It’s all about that concept of opportunity cost – the potential benefit you give up by focusing on one thing (editing) over another (growing your business).

from Zen to Burnt Out:

We all love that feeling of getting “in the zone” while editing. But here’s the thing: spending too much time glued to your screen can take a toll on your mental well-being. Deadlines, client revisions, and the constant pressure to deliver perfection can lead to serious burnout. Remember, a happy and healthy you is essential for running a successful business.

The Jack of All Trades, Master of None:

There’s no denying it, editing is a valuable skill. But here’s the secret: your clients aren’t just paying for your video editing expertise. They’re also paying for your creativity, communication skills, and ability to understand their vision. If you’re constantly buried in editing, you might neglect these other crucial aspects of your business, leaving you feeling like a one-trick pony in the long run.

Missing the Big Picture:

The world of videographer is constantly evolving. New trends emerge, client needs shift, and software updates change the editing game. But if you’re perpetually stuck in the edit bay, you might miss out on these crucial industry developments. This can make it harder to stay competitive and attract the kind of clients who value your expertise.

Don’t get me wrong, video editing is a vital part of the videographer process. But by understanding these hidden costs, we can start to shift our focus and build a more sustainable business model. Stay tuned, because in the next section, we’ll explore some actionable strategies to help you escape the editing trap and achieve that sweet balance between crafting killer videos and growing your dream business!

For more information about Video Editing Services and Film Editing Services visit here Panda Raid Media

[traveltrainsandcoffee]

THE EURO FFL 2024 REVIEW

Picking the teams was a big challenge this time, in the old days it was easier to tell players positions, but much harder now. Confusion over who were forwards, Midfielders and even defenders. Newbie Team Aroma barista Tilda tried to pick Newcastle midfielder Bruno Guimaraes, but he wasn’t in the Euros, because he’s from Brazil. To add to the mix we had a general election going on at the same time. Good news Rishi, the euros are on BBC and ITV, so you don’t need Sky. As the Euro’s got closer the sad news broke that Liverpool and Scotland Legend Alan Hansen was seriously ill in hospital. Former Arsenal and Everton striker Kevin Campbell was also seriously ill in hospital. He sadly died on the first weekend of the euros.

So who were the favourites? The current Euro FFL champion was Steve Tatham, but he hadn’t really challenged much since winning it. Colin Fenwick was a contender, back in April he won the FA Cup. Could Kieron Mullin win the only FFL title he’d never won before? Jon Thomson had come very close in the main league before coming second to Kieron. Before the kick off most of Scotland seemed to go to Munich. I got a text from a German friend saying ‘I saw a drunken Scotsman in a kilt in the street at 6am.’ The news seemed to be full of my favourite places full of drunken Scott’s, from The Augustiner Keller to swimming in the fountains in Marienplatz. Oh yes sir, the Scotts were boogieing all over Germany. Then there was the English in their campervans. One family on the BBC news had just been to Lidls. How strange, they have Lidl and Aldi in Germany, whatever next.

With all the teams in I sat in the mailbox with Team Aroma’s Olivia and Shann to watch the mighty Deutschland completely destroy Scotland 5v1. Sorry Liv. After game one Chris Geoghegan was top. Senol Durmush then proved he didn’t know his Hawks from his Grimsby Romas. Spain, Portugal and the Dutch made good starts. England in a slightly under par performance beat Serbia with a Bellingham goal. VAR disallowed 2 Lukaku goals, costing Belgium, meanwhile Austria were knocking hell out of the French players. Lots of kicking, Griezmann was pushed into the advertising board, cutting his face. Then Mbappe had his nose broken and would miss the next game. Christian Eriksen had pretty much died on the field at the last Euro’s. Amazingly after those horrible scenes he made a full recovery and scored for Denmark at these Euro’s. Tuesday morning and Team Aroma got a mention on BBC Radio 5Live, ooohh Kolsch. The first full league table of the Euros saw Colin Fenwick top, with Paul Taylor 2nd, Jon Thomson 3rd and Senol Durmush 4th. Team Aroma were bottom.

Round 2 started with a bit of controversy. Scotland scored what look very much like an own goal, but the UEFA goals committee gave it to McTomiany, Pleasing Blessing who had picked him. These dodgy goals committees once gave Crespo a goal, which he didn’t really touch, resulting in Kieron Mullin winning the 2006 World cup by just 1 point. Thursday night, in the Mailbox, with a few members of Team Aroma. Kane scored, but Denmark battled back for a poor draw. England were very poor and the folks back home weren’t sticking by them. All across England fans got very angry, even Shearer and Lineker were having a go, like a pair of angry uncles at a wedding.. Even in our FFL group chat people were saying how boring England were and should Southgate be sacked right now. Then things got a bit weird, Barista Sarah called for Positivity. Manifest a win, align our Chakras. Chakra? Didn’t they sing, I feel for you and I’m every woman? Well you cant say Manifest without thinking of succulent Chinese meals. In the end the call was to ‘get your hands off my portico pizza’. All this fun couldn’t takeaway how poor England had been and how unhappy England fans were. Another unhappy person was Dutch Manager Ronald Koeman. A very dodgy bit of VAR stopped the dutch beating Mbappeless French, get used to that Ronny. Turkey scored a terrible own goal in their 3 nil defeat to Portugal. The match will also be remembered for loads of Ronaldo selfie hunting pitch invaders running on the pitch during the game. At the end of round two Paul Taylor was top, 3 points ahead of Jon Thomson, with Senol 3rd ,Our Grimsby Roma 4th and Danny Lawson 5th.

Round 3 and Germany were through, but the Scotts were out. Austria won the group of Death and amazingly Georgia beat Portugal. A poor performance by England and a draw resulted in them winning the group unbeaten and in the easier looking half of the knock out draw. All good news, well the England fans didn’t see it that way. Boos, gestures, abuse, calls for Southgate’s sacking and some even started throwing things at Southgate and the team. Whatever happened to backing and supporting your country? In Euro FFL, Jon Thomson was still top, but facing a strong challenge from Colin Fenwick, Paul Taylor and Pam Taylor. Team Aroma were off the bottom at the expense of Holly Shakeshaft. Good news as Alan Hansen was now out of Hospital and recovering.

Round 4 and it was the weather that was making the headlines. I’ve never seen so much rain in Germany, not in all my visits. It poured down, even thunder and Lightning. It got so bad that the Germany Denmark game had to be suspended for 20 minutes. When they returned back to the field Germany beat Denmark. Defending champions Italy had been very disappointing and were now out. Also on that Saturday night Chris Geoghegan posted some very strange photos of Tattoos and urinals, no idea why, but he seemed to be “loving it, loving it, loving it”. England were terrible against Slovakia. Even Bellingham was poor, somehow Southgate had turned him into Carlton Palmer. Slovakia were winning and England looked out, but with seconds to go, Bellingham scored an amazing overhead kick goal. Kane scored in extra time and somehow England had turned things around. Belgium were out, while France and Portugal were through. Several FFL managers had picked Ronaldo, but he couldn’t score. To try and cheer the England team up and improve the mood, Ed Sheeran turned up at the England camp. I’m not sure that helped much. In our league Jon Thomson was still top and 3 points clear of the Hawk, with Danny Lawson 3rd, Our Grimsby Roma 4th.

Round 5 and in one of the best games of the Euros, so far, Spain beat Germany. So as Rishi was being kicked out of number 10, the hosts were being knocked out of the Euros. After a great game, followed a terrible game. France beat Portugal in a bore draw. Was this the end of Ronaldo and FFL??? Mbappe or Batman as I like to call him seemed very out of sorts, who knew that a broken nose would have such an affect. England took on Switzerland and went behind, but a great Saka goal took the game to penalties. England won and Saka got his penalty redemption like Stuart Pearce did in Euro96, was it coming home? Jon Thomson who had led for most of the Euro’s was still top and 5 points clear. After leading the FFL back in April and letting it slip he wasn’t counting any chickens, even quoting A Tribe call quest. The main competition for the title was coming from Danny Lawson and Sally Sands. England would play the Netherlands in the semi finals.

Round 6 and with only 3 games to go Jon was top of the league, but not that confident of victory. France who had been terrible and broken nose Batman couldn’t save them. Spain were through to the final and 16 year old rising start Yamal was shining. Remember those pitch invaders from the earlier rounds? Well another one ran onto the pitch to celebrate victory, chased by security men. One of which lost his footing and two footed crashed into Morata, hurting him. Would he be fit for the final. The England semi and I was in The mailbox with some of Team Aroma. Many went to Lincoln castle including Our Grimsby Roma, who even made the BBC. Blessing said that England were always getting away with it. Yet another 90s song reference. Netherlands took the lead, but a controversial VAR penalty from Kane got England level. In a tight game it was Super sub Watkins who scored a winner right at the end. Amazing scenes as England made the final again. Jon Thomson top and 5 points clear of Sally Sands. All the 90s references and Jon and Sally top, it felt like the old days of 90s Tesco Lincoln 1. Oh the memories of England Spain penalty shootout on the radio in the staff canteen, while the shop floor was left empty. 1 point behind Sally stood Kieron Mullin, Danny Lawson, The Hawk and Ashton Lawson. At the bottom Holly was still adrift , 7 points behind Ollie Taylor Yassin and 13 behind Lee Ritchie.

So just the final to go. Off to Germany I went. Saturday morning and lots of England fans getting the Eurostar to Brussels, then Cologne. I spent the night in Cologne even saw the fan zone. Sunday morning and as I was getting the I.C.E to Munich the Spanish were getting the I.C.E to Berlin. Me and Ducklan Rice went to the Augustiner Keller very early and got a great seat. Caught the end of the tennis, but it was the football that matters. Having to explain to the Germans why I had a small yellow duck next to my beer was funny.

The final kicked off and the beer garden was packed, well over a thousand there. England had plenty of the ball, but couldn’t really do much with it. Few chances. In the FFL Jon was still clear and closing in on his first trophy since winning the champions league in 2002. Spain scored and lots of Spanish and Spanish supporting Germans cheered. England scored and lots of English and English supporting Germans cheered. Unfortunately for England, Spain were just too good and scored again. The side which had beaten Germany and France, had now beaten England. Back to back euro final defeats. Spain won their 4th major title in 16 years. Jon Thomson won Euro FFL 2024. He was 5 points better than the man who had snatched the FFL title from him in the final weeks of last season Kieron Mullin. Then came a couple of Lawsons, Sally Sands, the Hawk and our Grimsby Roma. The wooden spoon went to Holly Shakeshaft.

So that’s it, the Euros are over. I’m on holiday across Europe for the next 2 weeks and when I return we’ll be starting to think about the next season of FFL. Thank you for being part of Euro FFL 2024, I hope you’ve all enjoyed it as much as I have.

Final thought

60 years of hurt

MT

[onmymasa22]

Heres my thoughts right now.

Today you will not carry negetivity or anger. Believing in hashem means you know that everyone gets what is coming to them and everything is going according to the plan. You dont need to understand the plan or agree with humans. Everything that needs to happen will happen. I will breathe through today.

I want a year of knowing someone before marrying him. Like the whole process to take a year. I want us to see eachother when we're sick or angry or have a fight. I want something healthy with tough convos and upfront in your face past the honeymoon phase. I just know that once im married, we're a team- no my money verses ur money, its all together, my debts r ours, my bonuses r ours, i want to be enmeshed. Not clingy, just inlove. I see us spending time apart, but it should be that wed always rather be together.

Plaka neighborhood

Trading 50 jews for 150 Palestinians doesnt make sense to me. That means that i as a woman am worth 3 terrorists.

I love people because i love.

אני מעדיף לדבר איתך ב-4:44 בבוקר, אם צריך

מאשר לדבר בהלוויה שלך.

אין דבר יותר גרוע מלאבד חבר או חברה

שחשבו שאין להם עם מי לדבר.

הטלפון שלי דולק,

הדלת פתוחה

וכוס קפה אפשר למזוג בכל שעה

או להקשיב לך בטלפון.

בואו נתמוך אחד בשני.

תפרסמו את ההודעה הזו

כדי להראות שאתם תמיד שם כשמישהו צריך (ואתם יכולים).

תהיו כאן עבור מי שצריך.

כוחנו באחדותנו

I would rather speak to you at 4:44 in the morning, if you need, than to speak at your funeral.

Theres nothing worse than to lose a friend who thought that they had no one to speak to.

My phone is on,

The door is open,

And a cup of coffee can be poured at any hour

Or to listen to you on the phone.

Lets trust each other

Share this message to show that you will always be there if someone needs (and you are able).

Be there for those who need.

Our power is in our unity

Here's my turn to talk, and id appreciate your hearing what i have to say. Theres a few things you should know:

They offered to take care of zc during the week for those few weeks and you said no because she doesnt do so well after arie crown. Daddy finished learning halfway through all of shas and there was a big siyum for all of chicago on the 9th but mommy didnt want him to go because she thought maybe the Palestinians would show up there, so they made up that hed celebrate the finishing of half shas on sunday with rabbi hamoui (they didnt celebrate with everyone on thursday because one of the regulars was out of town Thursday). The library was an emergency to do that sunday because the Venezuelan guy who finished the deck was also able to take down the library, and it will cost mommy and daddy 1000 dollars versus quotes of costing 8000 by other people. this guy can only do it when its not raining or snowing, so he needed to start knocking it down on while the weather was still good because he cant be on the roof or really do any of it in the rain, and if it would be postponed, the guy would disappear, go to someone else, or the weather would get too bad. So we didnt love being rushed, but sunday was an emergency of getting all the library stuff into the den. No one told you not to come, i think they just told you that that's what was going on. Daddy going to see pa was an emergency just like wjen you were in a car accident was an emergency that daddy left work for when he knew. I dont think anyone knew that this was an emergency. I think everyone thought that when u didnt respond, that meant u were ok, and if it was an emergency, u would have said something in response. If anyone knew it was an emergency, mommy wouldve left work to look after zc. I dont think she knew that it was a- go right now to look after zc- situation. If she did, she wouldve done that in a second. From what i understand, the only times you wanted to bring zc over so you could study were those two sundays. The first sunday she came and i took her to the park, we wanted to have pizza for dinner to celebrate daddys half of shas as a family, but in the end he really didnt feel good, and i didnt either, so we didnt do it. I think we watched zc for as long as we could cuz she didnt want to do anything- she didnt want to take a nap, didnt wanna go on the swings, didnt want to eat. So she went on the slide a few times and then we watched elmo. I can really understand how sucky it is to see someones huge family and know that we dont have that. I think its totally normal to lose trust or alter ur relationship with someone who tried to hurt u. I dont know how fair it is when no one meant to hurt you. I think that they were unaware of how much of an emergency sunday was for you to be able to study, and u were unaware of how important the siyum for daddy finishing half of shas and getting the library cleared was. You didnt have all the facts, and they didnt have all the facts for mommy to know to leave immediately. Its a huge misunderstanding. I hope that knowing this will take a little bit of the hurt and disappointment away. Thats my only goal here, i really dont want u feel pain. I get that having a newborn and a toddler and having a job and taking the test is really a lot. I just want to help this from being another thing added to the list. But in the end, you get to choose what relationships u want with everyone, and what relationships ur kids have with everyone.

I feel like people think im super zionistic

Ok i just talked to a guy on the phone. My voice wasnt shaking. Definitely progress.

Me: im not really zionistic. I just didnt grow up with israeli flags or knowing any Hebrew. Its just not something that ever made me feel anything, and i cant make myself feel something i dont.

Hashem how am i ok. How i am i ok when theres a war. How am i ok when most of my things were thrown out. Yes i fell apart. Yes its hard when you know you wont find the blankets you bought. I wont have the pillows or coats.

I happen to just be obsessed with Jews. I think we are smarter, funnier, more irritating, more caring than any other nation. Israel just has a huge population

U can ask my parents how surprised they were when i said i wanted to move there immediately. It was a total shock because i was signed up to get a four year degree in art. But after learning about israel

In my personal opinion:

Israel is like a furnished apartment. Like the apartments that you see on yad2 where the ad says, "just bring your suitcase, it's totally ready. All that's missing is you". Israel is a country built with the ease of a Jew in mind. You get to act as Jewish as you want- leave early on holidays, take off a bit for your kids bris, the food in the supermarket is kosher, when you walk into a building, you're not the only Jew. I didn't grow up with any of that, and I don't really call myself zionistic. I can't help it, I didn't grow up with flags or knowing the words to hatikva. All I knew was riding camels and that you could ski and swim on the same day. Some Jews live in Israel. Some are stuck outside due to the war. Some go to Israel on trips, and some never go. It's ok to be in Israel, and it's ok to not. Either way you are doing your best. It's special to just know that it's there, like an apartment ready for you to just show up should you be there. I dont know if ill live anywhere else. Maybe I'll live in Cancun, or Paris, or Miami- I have no idea, I'm just here for the ride. But israel is special. There's a completeness in being israel.

its just missing you. To me, thats something that makes israel very special

. But i love israel because i love that israel has lots of jews, and that its the center of us, and that it feels like its always sitting there waiting for us. Whether we are living there, stuck outside because of the war, come on visits, or don't go ever: its always ready for you, whenever and ifever you decide to be there. Like a furnashed apartment. Israel is there, and will always be there. All thats missing is you, and thats the completeness feeling i get when I'm there. Maybe you do too.

When someone does something evil like the school does to me, either you have special needs and youre not aware that what youre doing isnt ok, or it will take you a few more lifetimes to fix what you did. In the end, its not about me, i dont judge you.

Yosef and Yehuda had an ongoing argument about which tribe will produce future kings. Yehuda said it will come from him Yosef said it should come from him because number one, he's a perfect tzaddik, and number two, he knows how to deal with the other nations from his time in Egypt. Spoiler alert, Yehuda wins. Why, you ask? Yosef passed all his tests. Because of this, he would have no mercy or empathy for someone who had a hard life or who made a mistake. He would have been: "You think you had it hard? I had it way worse!" and, "I came out on top, what's your excuse?!" Yehuda made a mistake with Tamar and did teshuva. That's the leader of a nation. We need someone who understands our mistakes and can guide us thrugh it all. Why did Hashem make Moshe the leader of the Jews? The medrash says that when he was a shepherd and one of the sheep strayed, he carried the sheep back to the flock on his shoulders. That's very nice but he was definitely not the only sheppard who cared about sheep. Lots of sheperds care, it's part of the day job. But the medrash continues on that on the way back, Moshe told the sheep, "I must not have given you enough time to drink before, because had I given you enough time, you wouldn't have had to go off alone". Not only does Moshe care, but he takes on the sheeps mistake as his own. That's a leader. That's who is the leader of people. Not someone who's perfect. Someone who knows how to make a mistake and come back from it. That's who will help others come back from their mistakes.

Yosef and Yehuda had an ongoing argument about which tribe will produce the future kings. Yehuda said that it will come from him. Yosef said that it will come from him because number one, he was a perfect tzaddik. And number two, he knows how to deal with the other nations of the world from his time in Egypt. SPOILER ALERT, Yehuda wins this argument.

Here's why. Yosef passed all his tests, came out, YOU ASK? YOSEF PASSED ALL HIS TESTS. BECAUSE OF THIS, HE WOULD HAVE NO MERCY OR EMPATHY FOR SOMEONE WHO HAD A HARD LIFE OR WHO MADE A MISTAKE. HE WOULD HAVE BEEN: "YOU THINK YOU HAD IT HARD? I HAD IT WAY WORSE!" AND, "I CAME OUT ON TOP, WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?!" YEHUDA MADE A MISTAKE WITH TAMAR AND DID TESHUVA. THAT'S THE LEADER OF A NATION. WE NEED SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS OUR MISTAKES AND CAN GUIDE US THRUGH IT ALL. WHY DID HASHEM MAKE MOSHE THE LEADER OF THE JEWS? THE MEDRASH SAYS THAT WHEN HE WAS A SHEPHERD AND ONE OF THE SHEEP STRAYED, HE CARRIED THE SHEEP BACK TO THE FLOCK ON HIS SHOULDERS. THAT'S VERY NICE BUT HE WAS DEFINITELY NOT THE ONLY SHEPPARD WHO CARED ABOUT SHEEP. LOTS OF SHEPERDS CARE, IT'S PART OF THE DAY JOB. BUT THE MEDRASH CONTINUES ON THAT ON THE WAY BACK, MOSHE TOLD THE SHEEP, "I MUST NOT HAVE GIVEN YOU ENOUGH TIME TO DRINK BEFORE, BECAUSE HAD I GIVEN YOU ENOUGH TIME, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO GO OFF ALONE". NOT ONLY DOES MOSHE CARE, BUT HE TAKES ON THE SHEEPS MISTAKE AS HIS OWN. THAT'S A LEADER. THAT'S WHO IS THE LEADER OF PEOPLE. NOT SOMEONE WHO'S PERFECT. SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A MISTAKE AND COME BACK FROM IT. THAT'S WHO WILL HELP OTHERS COME BACK FROM THEIR MISTAKES.

-Rabbi Wallerstein

School starts in a week and i want to be an artist. Ill show up to school as soon as i can. They can fail me if they want to. But i need to do kibbud av vaem. At 120.5 when i die, i wont be asked if i graduated college. It doesn't actually matter. But i want to know that i did kibbud av vaem. Its always a dance between living the life i want to live and making my parents happy.

Hashem i dont want to be angry. I want this to be my last gilgul. I am so close to you. This past shabbat i started shabbat later than i was supposed to, but i kept it till the end. I hope next week it gets better. I just need to try and be a good person. Be more loving. Be more learned. Be more devoted. Be more caring and gentle and doing the right thing. Just be nice. Be free. And nice. And pretty. And loving.

Don't treat people as bad as they are, treat them as good as you are

There is truth, there is the truth of the truth, and there is peace. The truth is "the boy stole an apple". The truth of the truth is "the boy was hungry". Peace is "nobody stole anything, now give the boy an apple" rabbi nachman

I have a question: if the mizbeach

What happened to the mishkan?

If moshe wouldve built the bais hamikdash and it wouldnt have been destroyed, we wouldnt have gone into galus- why did dovid ever build a bais hamikdash- why wasnt the mishkan good enough

I want to go to tzfat more

I want to go to bat ayin more

I want to connect to all of it

I want to be spiritual and in love life and be happy

I want for everything to be roses. To be authentic to myself. I wish i was one thing. I wish i had one style. I wish i was one of those people who was always can i be pretty hippy and sometimes preppy

Does anyone else think... how did i make aliyah? Like how did i do that?

One part of my brain: how the heck did i make aliyah? I dont think id be able to do it again if i tried

The other part of my brain: well, you were a little smart, a little cute, a little naive, and 20 years old... its definitely easier to move to a foreign country with all that than being 40 and wrinkly.

Jeans with a skirt

2graphicbandtees 2skirtpants

Dresses

I wang to b an artist

I want to see through the program im in

Because im studying art, i want the degree, but if they want to fail me because of attendance and i can only show up 6 weeks from now, thats what ill do cuz when im there, im there alone.

Charlie Harari's speech "our repsonse to the Matzav in Eretz Yisrael"

We almost never hear that someone is a tzaddik in the torah. That's all in the commentary. And then the one place is says straight out "this man, hes a tzaddik" (noach), all the commentators are like "nahhh not really". What's up with that?! What are the commentators getting at that we should learn?

There were two occurances with men being in a teyva- noach and later on, moshe. Noach was told that the world is crazy, build a boat. He built a boat, brought his family in, closed the door, locked it, done.

Moshe was a gilgul (reincarnation) of noach. What happened when Hashem said to Moshe- "hey, I want to start from scratch again and start a nation from you, lets do it". What did Moshe say? "No no no, I'm not gonna be without my nation. And more than that, if you end up carrying that out, take my name out of Your book, I don't want it to be like I ever existed!". Moshe with his message put the whole jewish nation on his boat. He wasnt cool with only knowing his immediate family was ok. And when we realize and act like we are all in the same boat, that achdus is what saves us.

אנחנו כמעט ולא שומעים על זה שמישהו היה צדיק ותורה. זה לא בפשט, זה כתוב אצל המפרשים. והפעם היחיד שכן כתוב ככה ברור (אצל נח), כולם אומרים "לעעע, לא באמת". מה קורה כאן?! מה המפרשים רוצים שנבין? פעמיים כתוב לנו שמישהו היה ב-תבה. נח, ואז יותר מאוחר, משה. לנח ד' אמר כולם משוגעים, תבנה תיבה, תנצל ת'משפחה שלך. הוא בנה תיבה, הכניס את המשפחה הגרעין שלו, סגר ת'דלת, נעול, זהו, סיים. משה היה גילגול של נח. ומה קרה כש-השם אמר למשה אחרי חטא העגל, "יאללה בואו נעשה עם חדש ממך, רק אני אתה ומשפחה הגרין שלך, מה אתה אומר?"? מה משה הגילגול של נח שבא לתקן אמר? "לא לא לא, אני לא מאשר את זה, אני לא רוצה להיות בלי העם שלי! ויותר מזה, אם אתה (השם) עושה את זה, תמחוק ת'שם שלי מכל התורה שלך- אני לא רוצה שיהיה סימן אפילו שהייתי קיים". בזה שמשה אמר ככה, הוא הכניס את כלללל עם ישראל לתיבה שלו. הוא לא היה שביעה מזה שרק המשפחה דרגה ראשונה שלו בסדר. וכשאנחנו מבינים ונוהגים בדרך שכל עם ישראל בסירה אחת, בתיבה אחת, האחדות מביאה הצלחה בכל מעשה ידינו.

[lenbryant]

Modern Love

(Long post/nytimes) Never Rely on a Man’s Money

Divorce was a shock that led me to a new vow: financial independence.

This essay is a preview of a Modern Love project on the intersection of money and relationships. More stories in this project will appear next week.

The moment I knew I would never again have a joint bank account, I was driving home in a hard rain with a small butterscotch lollipop in my mouth.

I would take the sweetness where I could find it. Nearly an hour before, I had logged in to the savings account I shared with my husband to discover that half of the savings had been withdrawn in one chunk, right after the last big argument my husband and I had.

I called him, and I’ll never forget what he said: His lawyer had recommended it.

He was a lawyer — and now he had a lawyer? This was also a shock. I hung up, wiped the mess of mascara from under my eyes, and drove through the rain to our local bank to withdraw the rest, my two children oblivious in the back seat.

When I left, clutching courtesy lollipops for us three, I knew my marriage was over. I knew I would need to use my half of the savings to hire a lawyer. And I vowed — a loaded verb choice, I know, given the context — never to be financially dependent on a man again.

In my marriage, I had been happy to say, “I’m not great with this stuff,” as I handed the financial responsibilities to my husband. I had outsourced my financial security to him, someone I trusted — and in doing that, I had disadvantaged myself.

Divorce was always going to be heartbreaking, but it didn’t have to be panic-inducing — and it was. What kept me awake, and what woke me in the middle of the night — sweating, heart racing — was fear. I was a poet and he was a litigator. It seemed impossible that I would be able to stay in the house. Even if by some miracle I did, how would I pay the mortgage, the utilities and the taxes each month? (And how much were our taxes, anyway? I had no idea.) I wasn’t sure how I would even afford the divorce itself. I knew all about billable hours from my husband, but this time I was the one being billed.

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From that day forward, I was determined to become the adult I wished I had been in my marriage, to be the C.F.O. of my own life.

It’s empowering to know what’s in my accounts, even if I don’t always love the numbers. My short-term alimony ended a couple of years ago, but I’m still receiving child support. It helps, in addition to my income from writing, teaching, editing and public speaking. It’s empowering to pay my own bills and see where the money is going. It’s empowering to meet with my financial adviser, even if my outlook for retirement is grim. The stress of knowing is preferable to the stress of not knowing. At least if I have the information, I can act on my own behalf.

Nearly two years after that bewildering evening at the bank, I started a new relationship. In the beginning, when my boyfriend would bring over a pizza, I would immediately Venmo him half the cost. Same for a box of doughnuts on a Saturday morning. He would roll his eyes — “Maggie, are you kidding me with this $8 Venmo?” — but if he was genuinely frustrated by my need to keep things separate and equal, he didn’t show it.

I think he understood that after my marriage, the pendulum had swung wide in the opposite direction, from too much dependence to, perhaps, too much independence.

My boyfriend, it’s worth noting, is a social worker. He helps people manage their trauma, substance abuse issues and anxiety. He understood that I was doing what I needed to feel safe.

I talk openly with him, and with my own therapist, about the grief and cognitive dissonance of my divorce and the impact it’s had on me. As a self-employed writer with sole custody of two school-age children, I feel like a one-woman band. Picture Bert, Dick Van Dyke’s chimney sweep character, at the beginning of “Mary Poppins.” That’s me, cymbals attached to my knees, big bass drum on my back, a vest of horns, a tambourine dangling and an accordion in my hands.

There are some days I tell myself that my ability to manage so much on my own should be a source of pride, and that my insistence upon self-reliance is healthy. It’s good for me to know I can stand on my own two feet. Other days, I wonder if the pendulum has swung too far. I’ve Googled “hyper-independence,” and I’ve watched the autofill provide a list of phrases that seems to call me out: “hyper-independence trauma response,” “hyper-independence coping mechanism,” “hyper-independence betrayal trauma.”

The truth is, I do have trust issues, and it’s hard for me to let go of my white-knuckled hold on life. There have been times when I’ve made my boyfriend feel unimportant and have pushed him away. Feeling needed makes someone feel secure in a relationship — and here I am, trying not to need him.

I hire a babysitter for my children when I travel for work, knowing he would happily be here with them. I’m all too aware of the power dynamics that can exist around finances, work and caregiving. I don’t want to fall into the same patterns, married or not, living together or not.

It’s important for me to keep my wants and needs separate. To say, through my actions: I’m in this relationship because I want to be in it, not because I need to be.

After my divorce, my friend Kelly asked, “What’s your top priority now in one word?”

I answered immediately: “Autonomy. What about you?” She and her son’s father had divorced years earlier.

“Community,” she said.

We laughed about how these feel like opposite impulses — one for care and connection, the other for self-sustenance and independence. But they’re not opposite at all. One can be deeply connected to their community and have close relationships with others, but also remain self-sustaining. I believe this.

I think back to the months my husband and I spent in couples counseling, and how hard I had fought to save the marriage. I wanted to keep our family intact for the children, but also a lot of the scramble was about fear. That heart-racing, middle-of-the-night fear: How could I possibly make it on my own?

I’m ashamed to think of that woman now, the one who was so afraid, so dependent and so ignorant about her own finances. I’m ashamed to admit that for a time I tolerated dishonesty and unkindness because the alternative, the one-woman band, felt worse.

It isn’t worse. I don’t always love playing all the instruments myself, but I do trust myself to play them. Is that a hyper-independent, hypervigilant thing to say? I’m working on all of this in therapy, and I do think I’m learning to trust and rely more on others. I still worry about money — retirement, the children’s college tuition, my hundred-year-old house — but I’m not panicking because I know my financial situation.

Now when my boyfriend and I go out, we split the bill, or we take turns — he buys lunch at the vegan cafe, and Chinese takeout is my treat. I don’t Venmo him after he sends me flowers or brings me coffee. There is a difference between kind acts — sharing, giving — and relying on each other. It’s the reliance that still spooks me.

If someone asked me what my priority is in one word, I’d still say, “autonomy.” Being autonomous doesn’t mean being a lone wolf or refusing help. It means building a life in which my ability to do my work and support myself does not depend on romantic partnership.

I need to know that I can thrive on my own, but I also want to love, trust and feel connected. It’s a balance I’m trying to get right. Perhaps the pendulum is swinging back to the center.

I still have a babysitter for my children when I travel for work, but I’m trying not to be rigid about it. My boyfriend always offers to help, and I tend to wave him off with, “I’ve got it.” But recently he stayed here with my children for a night while I was out of town. I knew they were safe, well-fed (my boyfriend’s vegetable curry is legendary) and laughing at his terrible dad jokes.

When I returned (and as I expected, found a huge container of leftover curry in the fridge), I reconsidered the metaphor I’ve been using to describe my life. I don’t have to be a one-woman band. I can be autonomous and still hand off an instrument now and then — the accordion, trumpet, harmonica — and trust him to play.

What will that music sound like? I’m listening.