#if i had to live with that kind of media environment i think i would launch stones at city hall on the regular

[brbgensokyo]

i briefly exposed myself to american radio for five minutes and i could feel the geiger counter clicking faster and faster

[cookinguptales]

So I’ve been enjoying the Disney vs. DeSantis memes as much as anyone, but like. I do feel like a lot of people who had normal childhoods are missing some context to all this.

I was raised in the Bible Belt in a fairly fundie environment. My parents were reasonably cool about some things, compared to the rest of my family, but they certainly had their issues. But they did let me watch Disney movies, which turned out to be a point of major contention between them and my other relatives.

See, I think some people think this weird fight between Disney and fundies is new. It is very not new. I know that Disney’s attempts at inclusion in their media have been the source of a lot of mockery, but what a lot of people don’t understand is that as far as actual company policy goes, Disney has actually been an industry leader for queer rights. They’ve had policies assuring equal healthcare and partner benefits for queer employees since the early 90s.

I’m not sure how many people reading this right now remember the early 90s, but that was very much not industry standard. It was a big deal when Disney announced that non-married queer partners would be getting the same benefits as the married heterosexual ones.

Like — it went further than just saying that any unmarried partners would be eligible for spousal benefits. It straight-up said that non-same-sex partners would still need to be married to receive spousal benefits, but because same-sex partners couldn’t do that, proof that they lived together as an established couple would be enough.

In other words, it put long-term same-sex partners on a higher level than opposite-sex partners who just weren’t married yet. It put them on the exact same level as heterosexual married partners.

They weren’t the first company ever to do this, but they were super early. And they were certainly the first mainstream “family-friendly” company to do it.

Conservatives lost their damn minds.

Protests, boycotts, sermons, the whole nine yards. I can’t tell you how many books about the evils of Disney my grandmother tried to get my parents to read when I was a kid.

When we later moved to Florida, I realized just how many queer people work at Disney — because historically speaking, it’s been a company that has guaranteed them safety, non-discrimination, and equal rights. That’s when I became aware of their unofficial “Gay Days” and how Christians would show up from all over the country to protest them every year. Apparently my grandmother had been upset about these days for years, but my parents had just kind of ignored her.

Out of curiosity, I ended up reading one of the books my grandmother kept leaving at our house. And friends — it’s amazing how similar that (terrible, poorly written) rhetoric was to what people are saying these days. Disney hires gay pedophiles who want to abuse your children. Disney is trying to normalize Satanism in our beautiful, Christian America. 

Just tons of conspiracy theories in there that ranged from “a few bad things happened that weren’t actually Disney’s fault, but they did happen” to “Pocahontas is an evil movie, not because it distorts history and misrepresents indigenous life, but because it might teach children respect for nature. Which, as we all know, would cause them all to become Wiccans who believe in climate change.”

Like — please, take it from someone who knows. This weird fight between fundies and Disney is not new. This is not Disney’s first (gay) rodeo. These people have always believed that Disney is full of evil gays who are trying to groom and sexually abuse children.

The main difference now is that these beliefs are becoming mainstream. It’s not just conservative pastors who are talking about this. It’s not just church groups showing up to boycott Gay Day. Disney is starting to (reluctantly) say the quiet part out loud, and so are the Republicans. Disney is publicly supporting queer rights and announcing company-supported queer events and the Republican Party is publicly calling them pedophiles and enacting politically driven revenge.

This is important, because while this fight has always been important in the history of queer rights, it is now being magnified. The precedent that a fight like this could set is staggering. For better or for worse, we live in a corporation-driven country. I don’t like it any more than you do, and I’m not about to defend most of Disney’s business practices. But we do live in a nation where rights are largely tied to corporate approval, and the fact that we might be entering an age where even the most powerful corporations in the country are being banned from speaking out in favor of rights for marginalized people… that’s genuinely scary.

Like… I’ll just ask you this. Where do you think we’d be now, in 2023, if Disney had been prevented from promising its employees equal benefits in 1994? That was almost thirty years ago, and look how far things have come. When I looked up news articles for this post from that era, even then journalists, activists, and fundie church leaders were all talking about how a company of Disney’s prominence throwing their weight behind this movement could lead to the normalization of equal protections in this country.

The idea of it scared and thrilled people in equal parts even then. It still scares and thrills them now.

I keep seeing people say “I need them both to lose!” and I get it, I do. Disney has for sure done a lot of shit over the years. But I am begging you as a queer exvangelical to understand that no. You need Disney to win. You need Disney to wipe the fucking floor with these people.

Right now, this isn’t just a fight between a giant corporation and Ron DeSantis. This is a fight about the right of corporations to support marginalized groups. It’s a fight that ensures that companies like Disney still can offer benefits that a discriminatory government does not provide. It ensures that businesses much smaller than Disney can support activism.

Hell, it ensures that you can support activism.

The fight between weird Christian conspiracy theorists and Disney is not new, because the fight to prevent any tiny victory for marginalized groups is not new. The fight against the normalization of othered groups is not new.

That’s what they’re most afraid of. That each incremental victory will start to make marginalized groups feel safer, that each incremental victory will start to turn the tide of public opinion, that each incremental victory will eventually lead to sweeping law reform.

They’re afraid that they won’t be able to legally discriminate against us anymore.

So guys! Please. This fight, while hilarious, is also so fucking important. I am begging you to understand how old this fight is. These people always play the long game. They did it with Roe and they’re doing it with Disney.

We have! To keep! Pushing back!

[rafecamerons-national-anthem]

𝒞𝐻𝐸𝑀𝐼𝒮𝒯𝑅𝒴-𝒟𝑅𝐸𝒲 𝒮𝒯𝒜𝑅𝒦𝐸𝒴

𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪 Drew Starkey and Y/N’s romance ignites the moment they meet at an audition, each drawn to the other by a magnetic connection that feels like fate. As they’re cast as romantic leads in Love Amongst the Lines, their on screen chemistry mirrors the real bond blossoming between them.

✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮♥✮

The moment their eyes met across the crowded room at the audition, it was as if time had stopped. His heart skipped a beat as he took in her radiant smile and the way her eyes sparkled with excitement. She felt a warmth spread through her body, the kind she had only read about in her favorite romance novels.

Drew, a rising star in the film industry, had seen countless faces in his auditions, but none had ever captivated him quite like hers. Y/N, on the other hand, was a newcomer to the world of acting, her passion for the craft burning brightly and her nerves jangling like a thousand bells.

Their hands trembled as they reached out to shake for the first time, the electricity between them palpable. "Hi, I'm Drew," he murmured, his Southern drawl sending shivers down her spine. "And I'm Y/N," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. "It's so nice to finally meet you in person."

Drew couldn't help but feel that this was more than just a chance encounter. The chemistry between them was undeniable, a force that seemed to pull them closer together despite the chaotic environment. They exchanged nervous laughs as they talked about their shared love for the art of storytelling and the thrill of bringing characters to life.

As the audition process rolled on, they found themselves stealing glances at each other between takes, each one more meaningful than the last. It was during a break in filming that Drew mustered the courage to ask her out for coffee, hoping to get to know her better outside of the intense pressure of the audition room.

"You know," he began, his voice a little shaky, "I think we could really make a great team." Y/N felt her cheeks flush at his words, the hint of a smile playing on her lips. "I'd love that," she replied, her voice filled with hope and excitement.

Their first date was nothing short of magical. They talked for hours about their dreams, their fears, and the movies that had inspired them to pursue acting. The connection grew stronger with each shared laugh and secret revealed. It was as if they had known each other for a lifetime rather than a few short hours.

As they walked back to the studio the next day, the air was charged with anticipation. They had both received the news that they had been cast in the lead roles of the upcoming romantic comedy, "Love Amongst the Lines." Their hearts raced as they thought about the journey they were about to embark on together, not just as co stars, but as a couple whose love had blossomed in the most unexpected of places.

The first day on set was a whirlwind of activity. The director, a seasoned veteran with a keen eye for talent, noticed the palpable energy between them and knew that their real-life romance would translate beautifully onto the screen. As they rehearsed their scenes, Drew couldn't help but feel a thrill every time he was close to Y/N. Her touch, her scent, her laugh, it was all so intoxicating.

Their on screen chemistry was undeniable. The way their eyes met, the way their fingers brushed against each other's, and the way they delivered their lines as if they had been written just for them. It was clear to everyone on set that this was more than just acting, it was true love unfolding before their very eyes.

But as the days turned into weeks and the script grew more intimate, Drew and Y/N began to feel the weight of their newfound feelings. Was it possible to keep their personal lives separate from their professional ones? Could they handle the scrutiny of the media and the demands of the film industry? Or would their love story be nothing more than a fleeting moment in the spotlight?

Their conversations grew more serious as they grappled with these questions. Yet, every time they looked into each other's eyes, all doubts disappeared. They knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, they had found something special, something worth fighting for.

And so, as the cameras rolled and their characters fell in love, Drew and Y/N couldn't help but feel that their own love story was playing out alongside the script. With each kiss they shared, each tender moment they created, they fell a little deeper. The lines between reality and fiction blurred, leaving only the raw, unfiltered emotion that came with falling in love for the first time.

"Cut!" the director yelled, snapping them out of their daze. They pulled back, their faces flushed and their hearts racing. The crew around them applauded, but their minds were elsewhere.

"That was…amazing," Drew whispered, his gaze never leaving hers. Y/N felt a blush creep up her neck. "You really brought it to life," she said, her voice trembling slightly.

Their relationship grew stronger as the filming progressed, each intimate scene only serving to strengthen the bond between them. Off screen, they found themselves rehearsing their lines together, discussing character motivations and plot points, but mostly just lost in each other's company. It was as if the universe had conspired to bring them together, and now they were inseparable.

But with every public appearance and interview, the pressure mounted. They had to be careful not to let their real feelings show, to keep the magic of their budding romance contained within the confines of the set. The paparazzi were relentless, searching for any hint of scandal or a juicy storyline to sell to the tabloids. Yet, they remained steadfast, choosing to keep their love a secret from the prying eyes of the world.

One evening, after a particularly grueling day of shooting, they found refuge in a quiet corner of the set. The lights had dimmed, and the only sound was the soft hum of the air conditioning. Drew took her hand in his, his thumb tracing circles on her skin. "You know," he said, his voice barely audible, "I never thought I'd find this kind of connection on a movie set."

Y/N looked at him, her eyes filled with emotion. "Neither did I," she confessed. "But here we are."

They leaned in, their lips meeting in a soft, tender kiss, a kiss that spoke volumes about the depth of their feelings. It was a moment that seemed to exist outside of time, a secret shared between the two of them amidst the chaos of production.

As the weeks turned into months, they grew more comfortable with each other, their love story weaving itself into the very fabric of the film. And though they knew the end of filming would bring an end to their shared secret, they were determined to make the most of every moment.

But little did they know, the universe had more surprises in store for them. As the final scenes were shot and the director called for the last take, the cast and crew gathered around to congratulate them. The whispers grew louder as rumors of their off-screen romance began to spread. And when the cameras stopped rolling, it was no longer just their characters who had to navigate the choppy waters of love and fame, it was Drew and Y/N themselves.

Their gazes held, filled with a mix of excitement and trepidation. They had taken a chance on love in the most unlikely of places, and now they were about to find out if their love story could survive the glare of the spotlight.

The premiere of "Love Amongst the Lines" was a star studded affair, with the who's who of Hollywood eagerly awaiting the debut of the film's dynamic new couple. Drew and Y/N walked the red carpet together, their arms entwined, every step a silent declaration of their feelings for each other. The flashes of cameras and the screams of fans only served to amplify the butterflies in their stomachs.

As they took their seats inside the theater, Drew leaned over to whisper in Y/N's ear. "Remember, we're in this together." She nodded, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears. The lights dimmed, the film began, and their love story played out before an enraptured audience. Each shared glance, each tender touch, each whispered "I love you" resonated with an honesty that could not be faked.

After the credits rolled and the applause died down, they held their breath as the reviews began to pour in. Critics raved about their on screen chemistry, dubbing them the new "It" couple of the industry. But amidst the glitz and glamour, they held onto each other tightly, knowing that the real magic was in the love they had found off screen.

Their relationship became the talk of the town, with fans eagerly following every detail of their blossoming romance. Interviewers threw in sly questions about their real-life counterparts to the characters they played, hoping to catch a glimpse of the truth. Yet, Drew and Y/N remained professional, always giving just enough to keep the mystery alive.

Through the press junkets and the award season, they grew more in love with each passing day. Their secret had become their shield, allowing them to keep their relationship pure and untouched by the often harsh realities of the entertainment business.

But as the whispers grew louder and the rumors more insistent, they knew they couldn't hide forever. The time had come to decide if they were ready to take the next step, to share their love with the world and see if it could withstand the scrutiny of the public eye.

Their hearts pounding in unison, they made the choice to go public. Hand in hand, they faced the media, their love for each other shining brighter than any Hollywood spotlight. The announcement sent shockwaves through the industry, but Drew and Y/N only had eyes for each other, their bond unshakeable amidst the chaos.

The journey ahead was uncertain, fraught with challenges they had never imagined when they first met in that crowded audition room. But as they looked into each other's eyes, they knew that together, they could conquer anything that came their way.

Their love story had become a real life fairytale, and as they stepped out into the world as a couple, ready to face whatever came next, they had one thing in common with their on screen counterparts, they were ready to write their own destiny.

[eretzyisrael]

This account, first published in JewishNews, is written by an anonymous London-based Guardian employee who has family living on a kibbutz in southern Israel. It offers a look at life in the newspaper’s offices in the days since Hamas’s attack on Israel.

I wake up on October 7 to a text from my brother-in-law: “Thoughts are with your family in Israel. I hope everyone is safe.”

I check the news. Hamas has entered southern Israel. They’re in a kibbutz. My partner’s family is in that kibbutz. His cousin is nine months pregnant. He’s in contact with them; they’re in the safe room. Terrorists are outside.

I check social media. Reports of hostages, maybe three. I check again; perhaps ten.

There has been a massacre at a music festival. I look at the video. Who do I know there? I check social media again; there are videos of hostages. I look at their faces. Do I know them?

We lose contact with family in the kibbutz. I tell myself that the phone lines are down because the IDF are there. I watch Hamas footage as it is coming out. I go on Telegram for the first time in my life and I see a room full of bodies covered in blood. I see children gunned down. I see the bodies of raped women. I see families holding each other as Hamas livestreams atrocities. I look for people I might know.

My partner and I walk 30,000 steps. There’s nothing we can do. Late that evening we hear that his family is safe but their house is gone, neighbors are dead.

I don’t understand. I could have easily been there and part of me thinks I was.

I look at the papers the next day. The newspaper I work for has a tank on the front page: ‘Hundreds die and hostages held as Hamas assault shocks Israel’—victorious terrorists hold a Palestinian flag. The subheading reads ‘Netanyahu declares war as 150 Israelis die. 230 Palestinians killed in air strikes.’

I don’t understand. I know people, Israelis, who were murdered. They did not “die,” as if in some kind of accident. I saw footage of terrorism. It was not an “assault.”

The front page of The Observer, The Guardian’s sister Sunday newspaper, on October 8, the day after the Hamas massacre. (via The Observer)

On Sunday, we get more information about what happened to my partner’s family, about how Hamas set the family’s house on fire when they thought it was empty, how my partner’s cousin screamed for her life when the room filled with smoke, how her husband had to pin her down to stop her cries, how Hamas laughed when they realized the family would need to crawl out of the room, how they refused to leave the burning building. We hear that they somehow survived and walked out through pools of their neighbors’ blood, pieces of dead children littering the street; kids who’d been playing on a Saturday morning.

I’m safe, I’m fine, but I can’t comprehend the color of the sky or the rustle of the trees. I look around at people enjoying their Sunday and I think: Do they not know what is happening? I check the news again and see there are more hostages. I look through the names.

There are still terrorists in Israel.

I listen to the radio, one Israeli interviewee and then one Palestinian. I can hear that the interviewer is struggling as defenders of Hamas justify terrorism. I don’t understand. Is this how they reported the Russian invasion of Ukraine? Did they platform Putin’s people?

I check social media. A friend has posted: “They’ve broken out of jail.” Another has said: “Today is a day of celebration,” and someone else has shared an infographic of “Settler colonialism for beginners.” My old flatmate tells her followers she will be at the demonstration outside the Israeli embassy and she invites people to join her.

On Monday I go to work. How are your family, a colleague asks. When I answer, she squirms. Can’t they just leave, my colleague says. No, they can’t actually.

I look at the morning newsletter for the newspaper I work for. It breaks down the number of dead Palestinian children. It does not mention dead Israeli children.

My group chats are exploding as family and friends work out what has been happening, who is alive. I go back to the news. I type the name of the kibbutz into the wires. Nothing. I read how Hamas invaded “settlements.” They’re not settlements! They’re small, pre-state kibbutzim.

I find out that a friend of a friend was at the music festival and is missing. I’m shaking at work.

I see a colleague who had posted about “decolonization” all over social media over the weekend. They’re laughing with the rest of their team. They’re having a great day. I used to love their podcast, full of hot takes and celeb gossip. Now they’ve evolved into an expert on the Middle East. It doesn’t look like their family is in the middle of it, though.

No one else at work speaks to me about it. I nod my way through conversations about fonts and I stumble home.

I go back the next day. I look at the front page. A photo of Gaza and “violence escalates.” Israelis “dead” but Palestinians “killed.” If they can’t empathize with the Jews now, they never will.

I email the editors. I tell them that my newspaper’s coverage has been upsetting. They tell me that their thoughts are with my family but they stand by the paper’s reporting.

I hear colleagues complaining about the newspaper’s “American readers. They’re always accusing us of antisemitism.” They’re laughing.

I leave work early to go to a vigil outside Downing Street. People quietly weep. Everyone there is Jewish.

I’ve seen on social media that I know people going to a demonstration. Later, I see photos of it: people on lampposts, red flares, Jews hiding inside, the Israeli embassy boxed in. All kinds of people are united in the chant, “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.” In Sydney, they are shouting: “Gas the Jews.”

On Tuesday, I find out that my friend’s friend at the music festival is dead. I remember the day I’d spent with him on the beach in Tel Aviv last month. He’d gotten back from South America and was excited to travel again. He had been gentle and sweet. I don’t understand.

On Wednesday, I go to work again, and the next day, and the next day. Finally, the pictures from the kibbutz come out. I look at all of them. I rewatch the footage. I bear witness. No colleague asks me how I am again that week.

I go to synagogue at the weekend and cry with my community. The rabbi holds space for pain. I say Kaddish for the boy at the music festival I will never talk to again.

Back at work I see someone pointing to a photo of the Israeli flag burning in the newspaper. They laugh, “This is my favorite picture.”

I remember telling my family that when I next went to Israel I’d lie to my colleagues and tell them it was Spain. I’d lie because my colleagues had said to me of Israel: “You gotta go while you still can.”

Now another colleague asks me what I think of Netanyahu. Do I hold him responsible? I explain that I have protested against Netanyahu but the only people responsible for October 7 are Hamas. She keeps asking me about the settlements. I tell her they’re bad but she won’t stop. “Don’t you think Bibi has a lot to do with this?” I ask her if she has family in the region. She does not.

I’m on social media again. Friends share infographics from Jewish Voice for Peace and heavy-hitting images from the Gaza Health Ministry. I don’t disagree with what they’re posting but they said nothing when October 7 happened. I start unfollowing decades-old friends.

In the days that follow, my synagogue receives a bomb threat, my local rail station has photos of missing children ripped off, I hear of more friends of friends who have been killed. I hear of others who are now enlisted. I hear that a synagogue president in America has been stabbed to death and synagogues all over the world have been vandalized and destroyed.

The newspaper I work for is covering the bombardment of Gaza and I watch in horror. I think that Israel must defend itself. Yet when I say this, people will tell me I am justifying the murder of children. They will tell me it is a genocide.

As the events of October 7 draw on collective Jewish memory of pogroms and the Holocaust, the newspaper I work for will dispel that myth, publishing a piece entitled “Israel must stop weaponizing the Holocaust.” Am I wrong to connect our grief today with that of our past?

In the weeks that follow, I will apply for other jobs and speak exclusively to Jewish friends and family. I will hide myself away from the streets of London and the waves of social media.

I will not forget the photos and videos I saw on October 7, but I start to think about how this day will be marked; how my children’s children will take part in a new commemoration, where we will remember not the Romans or the Persians or the Nazis but Hamas, and how we survived.

Intergenerational trauma has been retriggered but now is not the time to dwell on our historical violent oppression. Now is the time to rise up, speak out, and defend our right to exist. Now is not the time for colleagues to dismiss Jewish pain or publish inflammatory op-eds that will spark more violence.

I will keep applying for other jobs.

[aclockworkreader]

Hi! I was wondering if you had any thoughts about everything that is going on around It ends with us. I didn't really know anything about the actors until after the movie was released and now I've seen that all the people involved seem to have horrible politics. I feel like this is similar to what happened in the Amber Heard trial, it's being treated like some kind of entertaining show even though the allegations are really serious. I think that the media coverage is not being helpful either and this type of cases might scare victims to speak up about their experiences after seeing how quickly everybody seemed to believe Baldoni.

i actually have a LOT of thoughts about this.

i made a video about the it ends with us movie (this was months before any news about her allegations and the lawsuit came out) and in it i briefly talked about the “drama” that was surrounding the press tour. i mentioned that while i don’t like any of the actors involved, i think most of what’s being said about blake lively is just misogyny and that i don’t trust justin baldoni because anyone who considers themselves a feminist and says “this is a story about women and i wanted it to be told by women” would never a) adapt this book in the first place and b) make himself the director.

and now, after all the news came out, i still stand by what i said.

what’s happening is exactly like the depp/heard trial and is a direct result of its outcome. people want a perfect victim. they cannot conceptualize that a woman can be complicated, unlikeable, even a bad person, and still be the victim of a crime. it doesn’t matter if blake lively is difficult to work with, took over the project, or is just simply annoying, everyone deserves a safe work environment free of sexual harassment. the way the public turned against her so quickly…..it’s genuinely disturbing. and for what?? a man people barely knew a few months ago? they believe him because he’s a self proclaimed feminist?? evil men flock to feminism the way they flock to religion, because they think it will absolve them of their sins.

i mean his team (which is the same pr team johnny depp hired, if that wasn’t already a huge red flag) has outright admitted to manipulating the public and turning them against her during the press tour?? his team isn’t even denying her claims (because they can’t because she has evidence) so instead they’re going with the “she was asking for it” narrative. it’s textbook! if it weren’t so fucked up, it would be funny.

and even if you ignore all that, even if you don’t want to look at the facts or the truth, even if you want to ignore all the signs we’ve seen a thousand times before—i would much rather be wrong about believing her than be wrong about believing him.

[chipped-chimera]

Hey gamers/modders, I been thinking about something and wondered what people's opinions are.

As someone who qualifies as 'old' by internet standards (over 30) and recently just read this article about Square Enix having to implement a 'customer harassment policy' - and I mean harassment from players/customers towards Squex staff, it got me thinking.

I have been gaming a while. A long while. And I really feel like about a decade ago, this shit would be considered 'rare' enough that it was uncommon. Now gamedev and even modders are facing harassment from players on a daily basis to the point policies like THIS are having to become a thing, like ....? Like I can point to SEVERAL cases of this in recent years, like how a lot of the BG3 devs and even VA's have been treated and harassed by fans with the expectation of somehow 'continuing' a closed-story-rpg-game indefinitely. The Sims 4 modding community is riddled with drama that I have not seen in any other modding space - at least to that level. Like I know incidents of prominent modders being fucking doxxed because they weren't IMMEDIATELY available to patch for a Sims 4 update (and the Sims 4 is honestly kind of notorious for frequent updating).

Like not to be a 'kids these days' person, but idk, there's only one group entering the wider gaming scene over those 10 years and that's Gen Z. I mean yeah, there's a decent argument towards the growing dominance of web 2.0 (basically your social media sites) that could have fostered an environment for 'anonymous harassment' but I find that hard to believe.

Growing up with games and discovering mods for the first time, I definitely learned to appreciate the hard work modders put in, out of their own time, to make a mod and share it with people for free! We also had to live through a lot of game releases where 'day one patch' was NEVER a thing, and gamedev delays were acceptable because of this - you wanted that game to work on release because you weren't going to GET a patch in most cases. Internet couldn't handle it. Now instead, we have games releasing in early, busted states with a day one patch because you've got some people sending death threats to developers if they mention another delay (Cyberpunk 2077 is a good case for this one).

I dunno. Is it just because I'm old and my priorities are different? I don't have the energy to burn on harassing devs? Because I grew up with games in a different manner than the current gen in gaming?

Thoughts?

[meefy]

Diverse Autistic Characters in Akagami no Shirayukihime

I could go on for hours about my dislike of how autism is, for the most part, portrayed in popular media - the butt of a cruel joke; autism representation by a non-Autistic actor; or centered around the plot of the story itself, where it boils down to the Autistic person "overcoming" their autism or some outside force "fixing" it (or, semi related, an Autistic character being shoehorned in as a token minority).

I think that's one of the reason I love Akagami no Shirayukihime so much. While none of the characters are confirmed as Autistic, the ones that are quite blatantly Autistic-coded are so diverse and so welcomed by the cast that it's both sweet and refreshing to see.

I have talked at length about Ryuu and why I love his character so much, so I don't want to get into it too much here because I've said most of what I want to say. He is, at first glance, the "typical" popular culture depiction of autism: the male child savant who has no friends, can't socialize, and has the niche restricted interests in science that seem to characterize every big Autistic character in media. But it doesn't take long to see he is so much more than that! His interests in poisons has granted him a field of study and work where he thrives and does what he loves day in and day out. His mentor, Garak, supports him and treats him as an equal, and looks for opportunities for him to grow - as does everyone around him, including Shirayuki.

Ryuu's time in Lilias was so beautifully depicted. The years he spends studying and working there are not him masking his Autistic traits or "beating" them; they are years of him feeling safe and supported enough to test his comfort levels and branch out because he knows he won't be mocked or scorned for it. He has found an environment where he thrives because of his Autistic traits, not in spite of them. And so, as of most recently, we see that he wants to remain in Lilias to continue his studies there because of this. His growth is not reduced to finally acting neurotypical; Ryuu being Autistic has not changed. But he has found others who share his passions, who support him, and who encourage him without changing who he is.

I also want to touch on Kirito specifically, because he is one of the few people Ryuu's own age who interacts with him. Kirito is too young to hold back his questions about Ryuu's behaviour. Why is he running away from a crowd of people? Why has he never had a snowball fight? But Kirito doesn't dwell on Ryuu's quirks; he accepts them, moves on, and focuses on what the two have in common - which is what I would hope for any Autistic person, myself included.

What is particularly special to me about how Autistic characters are depicted in AnS is the diversity. Too often I see Autistic characters depicted in the same way, like the author read a WebMD checklist and created a character around said list. Autism is a spectrum, and with that comes two ends of the spectrum.

Which brings me to Lata.

Although I haven't explicitly mentioned at length Lata + autism the same way I've discussed it about Ryuu (and although I could write a whole essay on it), I do want to go in a bit more depth because his overlap and contrast with Ryuu is exactly the kind of Autistic representation I live for. Ryuu actively wants to work to help people; Lata seeks to work in solitude. Ryuu is open and generally friendly with others, Lata is blunt and evasive. Ryuu's expressions are generally flat (and his voice monotone in the anime); Lata is quite expressive (even if he doesn't smile often, and neither does Ryuu). Yet we see certain similarities between the two; for instance, both have their own niche hyperfixations that they absolutely live for, and neither is totally at ease in crowds.

But leaving Ryuu out of the equation, one of my favourite things about Lata's character is that none of the Lyrias crew seemed genuinely bothered by how he acts. Like, even Obi's teasing is, by and large, in good faith. They're just like "Oh, that’s just how Lata is..." and move past it. Most recently in Chapter 133, Shirayuki is visibly happy to see him. And related to that, the other scholars always go out of their way to include and invite him to their outings - to their banquet celebrating the successful germination of the phostyrias, or to see them blooming in their lab. Even if he always declines, and they probably know he will always decline, they ask. Speaking on a personal note, I am like Lata and really, really hate parties or any large gathering; so people (understandably) stopped inviting me. And that hurt; even if I knew I'd say no, and wouldn't go, people actually thinking of me meant a lot more than they likely realized.

So, seeing representation of people actively trying to invite and include their Autistic comrade means so much to me.

Lastly, I want to talk about Shirayuki. It's not terribly often that Autistic representation in media is a female character, let alone the lead character. I know I am not alone in thinking Shirayuki is Autistic, but I do love its subtlety unless you know what to look for. The long running theory that there is a "girl" autism (versus the stereotypical "male" autism that is most commonly diagnosed and seen in popular culture) is absurd; autism is a spectrum, and just where some Autistics are reclusive, have a flat affect, and exhibit quirky behaviours and interests, there are plenty that are the complete opposite, or somewhere else along the spectrum. In many respects, this describes Shirayuki; she seems to have no trouble making friends, attending parties, or showing emotion.

And yet, she has the intense focus in herbalism and pharmacology that mirrors Ryuu's in many respects; she just does not express that interest in the same, "typical" Autistic way. She reads her textbooks to relax and spends time in a garden (the latter of which is, stereotypically, a perfectly expected behaviour for someone of her gender). It's easy to forget that, much like how Ryuu ran away from the crowd on his first day in Lyrias (a depiction of an Autistic shutdown), Shirayuki ran away from Zen when her feelings for him became too overwhelming. She asks Zen for a comfort object of his when she leaves for Tanbarun, much like how many Autistic people have a particular tangible object that gives them comfort. Shirayuki is also blunt; she tells Prince Raji to act more like a leader she can be proud of, and rebuffs the knight who insults Ryuu at the beginning of the story - her low rank does not deter her. Autistic people are sometimes known for apparently "not understanding" power dynamics and rules (which I doubt, as do most Autistic people - I think it's more likely that the rules and dynamics are simply unfair, and created and upheld by neurotypical people) - Shirayuki's behaviour certainly seems to fit this. She is not rude by any means...but where it might intimidate many others, a person's title does not keep her from speaking her mind. In many respects she reminds me of myself!

I could go on and on about this topic - and how different Autistic traits are present in different characters - but I'm comfortable stopping at Ryuu, Lata, and Shirayuki (at least for now), and reiterating that media like AnS proves that diverse Autistic characters can exist without being a punchline, can grow throughout the story without shedding their Autistic traits, and can be accepted, supported, and loved by others for who they are. This series is dear to my heart, and this is but one (albeit huge) reason why!

[mitsuas-coffee-shop]

𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎: 07/18/2024 𝚙𝚞𝚛𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚜𝚎: I got this blue to make you come up 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: love obsession, character being very touchy with reader, mentions of kidnapping, self-deprecating thoughts (from the character to himself) 𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜: yandere and angst 𝚃𝙾𝚃𝙰𝙻 (𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝): $2200

Inspired by the song: No blueberries from DPR IAN

In the city you live there's raining almost daily, an unbearable cold everytime you'd open your home's windows or front door as well. The only comforting zone you've find being a couple of cafeterias, lately, due to bad sales, many of them have been closing.

I like no blueberries in my ice cream cake.

You've started talking to him just by chance, met him on a cafeteria near your house you got to know a while ago through social media and decided to try out new pastries that always caught your eye when you scrolled down their page.

He had ordered an ice cream cake but seemingly didn't read all the ingredients the menu said it had, causing his expression to cringe when he saw the blueberries adorning it.

You didn't mean to stare, but had, and he got even more embarrassed and angry about this moment, shifting uncomfortably to avoid your gaze even if you were a sit next to him in the cafeteria's bar.

The barista was about to take the cake away again in the kitchen, but you spoke first. Maybe a little to high, causing the guy next to you to flinch in surprise.

"I'll take it, I'd like to try it out!" you excused, taking the plate from the girl's hands and ordering a drink for yourself too.

This had been your very first interaction, it was pretty odd and you thought you wouldn't see him there anymore.

I'm just kind of lost.

The shock you had when you saw him yet again in the same tall chair from last time was an understanment, he was ordering the same drink you got last time! A smile on his face and now he seemed much more relaxed.

You striked a light conversation from that, the man followed, engaged with whatever topic you came up with.

I'm falling way too soft.

You found yourself going to the cafeteria just as you got off from work, sitting in your usual spot with your usual beverage, some days waiting for him to come by and others you'd find him already ordering for both of you.

The girl who attended you that first and unique time would always know what to recommend, something with blueberries for you and a dessert between salty and sweet for him.

Now tell me when to stop.

Weeks passed, months, and as you least expected it, you had been friends with him for over a year and a half. You've gotten to go to each others' homes a couple of times; some meetings were on parks, but nothing would beat your preferred cafeteria's environment. It always being a reminder of your start with him.

You would be lying if you said you didn't feel anything for him, you often caught yourself thinking about him, how he'd been doing when you couldn't meet up because of work or getting worried when he'd text you he'd gotten sick.

But you'd also be lying if you said he hadn't acted a little too weird for your liking from time to time as well. Like the first time he got to meet your home.

I keep losing my temper for you.

That day had been raining dogs and cats, so your company gave you house work. As soon as you agreed via chat that you wouldn't meet today but the next day because of the thunderstorm, he somehow managed to convince you he's been out for a while and was close your house's direction that you mentioned way too long ago for you to remember.

You opened the door and yes, he was in fact damp but smiling cheekily to you. "Sorry to interrupt!" He apologized as you led him in your living room, weirded out to why would he be outside without an umbrella if he knows how common it is in your city to rain.

"I'll go look for a towel, wait here please," your phrame disappeared as you went for it in the bathroom, oblivious to his wandering enamored eyes scanning your house.

I love it how you think I'm always this cool.

He'd usually meet you with a present—be it a letter, a plushie, or his most favorite, a dessert. You've talked to him about how it is not necessary for him to do it, but he's persistent.

His smile vanishing any doubt you might get about him and his strange attitude towards you or how it'd change when he saw you with anyone else.

Everything was going perfectly in your life. You had friends, you'd get to visit your family often with your work's payment, you were happy. At ease.

Welcome to the other side.

At least a bit happier when he was not with you—which was definitely unusual.

It's been a year and half of getting to know him, he's been getting more and more clingy towards you and you are getting more and more uncomfortable about it.

Stop please.

You feel guilty for feeling this way, he's been nothing but sweet and caring everytime—excepting your first meeting of course—but why couldn't you feel yourself reciprocating your feelings? You've talked with friends and they've told you that he's definitely in love with you, crazily so.

I need a hostage free.

But you couldn't bring yourself to feel the same way for him. You were beginning to feel sick of all his attention, you felt trapped since lately he's been imposing weird rules to your daily routines;

I need a rocket ship.

He'd get to tell you good morning first since he'd wake up really early to come pick you from your home to your work, you'll see him on your lunch break, he'll get you back home safe and sound and last but not least, he'll pick which friends you'll get to hang out with.

I need to run from-

"Oh, and don't forget about the 'reporting myself' thing," you spoke, your tone raising but you couldn't control it as you recounted the things that had finally led you to this unfortunate moment.

You were telling him about your disagreements with his attitudes towards you.

His expression was one of confusion and as he spoke to reply to you, you noticed a shift from obliviousness to seriousness. He understood you, he understood everything you just told him in the privacy the walls of your home provided. He really did, he's eyes were proof enough, but his mouth told otherwise.

"What do you mean with 'why do I do it?' darling, I care for you!" He poorly justified, his gaze cold yet you could tell he was fighting something inside himself.

from you.

You decided to dismiss the topic for the day and kindly told him to leave since you were tired because of 'work'.

I'm just kinda lost.

The next day he got you to work as usual, what took you aback was his distant look, his hair was disheveled and clothes put messily. He was not smiling, he was present but absent at the same time.

You thought your words had really affected him, and tried to cheer him up a little when starting your usual morning conversation with him to begin the day.

However, even if you got him to giggle a little, it was certainly not the same amount you'd achieve any other normal day.

I fall from you.

"Can I have the moist lemon blueberry cake please?" the girl wrote down and looked to your right expecting your companion to order too.

"Uh-what, what do you want to order?" you asked him as you noticed the waitress puzzlement.

I've been looking down a lot.

"Just my usual beverage please." The girl barely heard it over his scarf, scurrying off to take more orders around the place.

You examined concerned towards him, he has barely spoken to you during this lunch break and it got more and more agonizing with each second.

I fall from you.

"Hey, I'm sorry for what I said yesterday, maybe I overreacted and believe me when I say I appreciate your favors, but I don't know, I got overwhelmed I think, I really appreciate you." You decided to explain a little further in hopes of getting your point of view across, as you overthought throughout your morning's shift you never thanked him for his attentions.

I'm fallin way too soft.

His eyes finally connected with yours after yesterday's events. They seemed to have gotten a little crystalline. Your words sinking deeply in his mind and heart.

Now tell me when to stop.

He took your hand in his and started running towards the exit, never letting yours go. You were astonished by his reaction, even more by his grip strength.

As he kept running, you asked what was he doing and where were you going, confusion and a bad feeling building up in your stomach, he never replied your questions.

He took you in his house, barely being able to catch his breath and close the door, lock in, as he embraced you and pressed his lips on yours hungrily.

Stop please.

You couldn't even bring yourself to react properly. He surely took your breath away but not in the way you would have ever liked to have.

I need a hostage free.

He separated from you, his expression mirroring yours, one of terror. He knew what he was doing, yet he didn't stop himself.

He really couldn't, and that's just exactly what he told you after apologizing desperately for his actions.

I need a rocket ship.

"How do you expect me to believe that?" you would have liked to ask, if it weren't for your kindness to think it sounded too harsh, or him speaking up first.

"I get you wouldn't trust me at all, but if I'm being honest, I..." he pauses, looking down in shame and fiddling with his hands, "I have been getting this strange urges when I'm with you."

I need to run from-

"It's like I want to have you all to myself but at the same time I know it's not fine! I try to reassure myself that everything will work out with you if I go slow, but I want nothing more than to hug you, hold your hand... kiss you."

from you.

Did he just admit he likes you? Loves you, even? Shedding tears he was confessing his love for you—his sick, twisted love for you.

"I-I'm sorry, I-I don't think I can reciprocate your feelings." However, you've found yourself bearing more with him than enjoying your time together as you used to do when you first met.

He looked at you, a blink, two blinks and you could see more tears threatening to fall with his next blink. Nevertheless, he sniffed and rubbed his eyes furiously, trying desesperately to erase his feelings forever.

I'm just kind of lost.

"I... it's-it's fine, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable just now, you-you can go now, hope we still can meet up again sometime..." he really was trying his best to not cry huh, he led you towards his door and opened it up for you, throwing one last broken smile.

I fall from you

It's been one month since you last heard about him, at his house, with that discussion and confession still sending you in spirals of thoughts all days.

I fall from you.

You've clearly hurted him, you opted to give him some space for the first week, by the second one you tried messaging him again, asking how he was or if he needed more time.

The third week, as you got no response, you decided to give it off too. Now starting again with Monday and nothing but 'delivered' in your chat has been hunting you, along that strange sense of something wrong coming closer each day since he ran out of that cafe with you.

I fall from you.

He did not want to do it, he couldn't help himself, he really didn't mean to. Didn't mean to interrupt your pacific life just as much as he didn't think that simple interaction at the cafe's bar would affect him that much. But it did.

I'm fallin way too soft.

He could not win his inner battle with the demon he never knew was living inside him until now—he spent hours begging to himself in the mirror to do not make something stupid, something as horrid as what he was thinking to do. He really did it, but as he continued to stare at his reflection he gave up to the monster's desires.

He had kidnapped you. He had you now on his house, at what cost? He could see your tear-stained cheeks, puffy eyes and red wrists due to his manhandlement, he regreted it, but there was no way back. He did it and just as that last string of hope got thin until it broke, his brute self came out to play.

So now you've blown all your covers.

I got this blue to make you come up.

So when you think it's almost over.

I got this blue to make you come up.

𝚂𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚐𝚎𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚖𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚎𝚗𝚓𝚘𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚖𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑;

BNHA ๋ ࣭ ⭑ Izuku Midoriya, Kirishima Eijiro, Tenya Iida, Tamaki Amajiki, Mirio Togata HQ! ๋ ࣭ ⭑ Hinata Shouyo, Asahi Asumane, Ittetsu Takeda Gakuen Babysitters ๋ ࣭ ⭑ Ryuuchi Kashima Obey me! ๋ ࣭ ⭑ Mammon, Leviathan, Beelzebub, Diavolo, Simeon

˚ ༘ ೀ ⋆ ｡ ˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ ⋆ ｡ ˚ +1 blueberry package

All writings rights reserved © 2024 Mitsua's Coffee Shop. (Credit to the respective owners of the pictures, song and tagged anime characters.)

[summerongrand]

7x01: The Shot

For those who don't know, I generally share my musings through a sociocritical lens because of The Rookie's unique position as a police procedural where all the female cops are women of color. I am protective of Lucy not just as a character but as a character who occupies a new space for Asian-Americans on network TV. At the same time, I love both parts of Chenford equally.

If you're not American, you're welcome to still read these posts but keep in mind that I'm an American writing about American media. These musings speak to the environment in the States.

Chenford: I have no reservations about them in battle. They still clearly trust each other with their lives and work well as a unit. He trained her with what he knows and she uses his techniques in a way that's Lucy Chen. There are obvious differences, of course, but Tim and Lucy are also two parts of the same person when they're out on the field. Their flirtation and banter in this episode aren’t my favorite. I don't think Lucy should've have accepted Tim’s bet so easily. There’s a harmful stereotype about Asian women being submissive to white men and we see it again through Lucy. I want to be clear that there are different types of submission, including emotional, social, psychological, and sexual. Lucy's submission to Tim here is emotional. We see Tim trying to occupy her “friend space” without actually earning her friendship, both when the bet is placed and in the parking lot scene, and Lucy letting him. I need Tim to at least give Lucy the adult conversation she asked for before she banters and flirts with him. If we compare the parking lot scene in 7x01 to the ones in 6x01 and 6x06, when he leaves her stunned, heartbroken, and standing by herself, it’s an improvement. However, had they had a polite exchange in 7x01 without her flirting back, it would show that he's working to earn her kindness back in small doses and Lucy would've come across as possessing more self-worth even as she looks at him in her rearview mirror. I like Tim watching her drive off and Lucy's rearview mirror double lookback on their own, without the flirting. It shows promise without Lucy giving Tim too much too soon, which the flirting and banter did.

Greycy: Wade Grey, the fearless and compassionate fatherly leader that you are! Wade leading from a helo is badass.

Lucy flubbing Grey’s title and referring to him Sergeant was Alexi's way of telling us that Wade got his promotion while not actually producing a scene about his promotion. I very much like Lucy being given this line.

It’s clear Wade has her back too and this feels like a continuation of his support for her in 6x07 after Tim broke up with her. He could’ve easily asked Angela or Nyla to fill in as temporary TO, but he chose Lucy and gave her an interim promotion to P3. He did this in such a fatherly way too, by saying it's a favor for him and that he owes her for it. Then he sweetens the request by letting her know that it will help boost her credentials for when a detective slot opens up.

"Officer Chen is stepping up." Here he's making it about Lucy and her willingness to take on a leadership role even though it's him wanting to give her a leadership role.

I think Grey's promotion will be used to advance Chenford, Wesley, Nyla, and others' storylines later on this season. He can do more as a lieutenant and this will enable opportunities to open up for the rest of his team.

Wopez: Dealing with the London fallout is such a clever way to move Wesley to Mid Wilshire. Detective Graham is a douche and in a perfect world, his words about Angela (which are far worse than Miles making a pass at Lucy) would be made known to everyone. I love jealous Wesley.

Nyla/Angela: Melissa said that everyone shines in this episode but I didn't see that with Nyla or Angela. Neither of them had much screentime. The little that Angela had was passive and Nyla was barely there.

Aaron: You're telling me this is the same guy who was locked up in a foreign prison for a crime he didn't commit, was seemingly fine joining Mid Wilshire where people know his past business, then isn't able to stay at Mid Wilshire because of secrets that he and many other officers at the station (officers who stayed) shared with a crooked therapist? No, bro.

Me to Alexi: Don't do this. Why are you doing this?!

Celina: Besides the awkward and funny pause after Nolan's "What are you wearing underneath your uniform?" I didn't find her memorable.

Seth/Miles: Miles has layers and depth. I could see Seth more on Blue Bloods with the Reagan crew than at Mid Wilshire.

I don't like Miles asking for a TO swap. Sure, he’s supposed to be cocky, but there are better ways to convey that. I originally took Tim's reaction to it as jealousy, but after a rewatch of the scene, I'm now interpreting it as Tim being pissed at Miles for disrespecting rank and objectifying a fellow officer. It reminds me of the Tim in 1x06 that smacked the grimey guy for checking Lucy out with his one eye. I can't wait until Miles finds out about Chenford's relationship.

There seems to be a lot to unpack with Miles in a S1 Tim type of way. I'm looking forward to seeing more of his dynamic with Tim.

Nolan: Nolan doubts himself! Nolan redeems himself! Gooooooooo Nolan!

Cholan's history (romantic, as part of the same academy class, being rookies together) makes it even funnier that Chenford ignored him twice. Bailey: They really leaned into the Mary Sue trope to explain away Jenna's absence and shipped her off to the National Guard. It reminds me of 5x18 when Bailey had an endless amount of credits to her name. They know that we know.

Los Angeles: The latter portion of this episode was a love letter to Downtown LA. Multiple shots of the skyline. 6th Street Bridge. The chase happening in the heart of downtown.

A chunk of this episode was filmed right in front of the Walt Disney Concert Hall which is across the street from the LADWP building which doubles as the exterior to Mid Wilshire Station. This was so meta! They were chasing suspects right in front of their own station while pretending they were somewhere else.

The day this episode aired, Southern California was under a severe weather warning and bracing for the worst in over a decade. The timing of the season premiere feels surreal ... an apocalyptic nuke storyline playing out onscreen in Los Angeles while the real Los Angeles looks, feels and smells apocalyptic.

Final thoughts: In a parallel universe, Jackson, Lucy and Nolan are sitting at the TO table as Sergeant, Detective, and P3.

[ndconceptarchive]

Her Interactive - Megan Gaiser and Robert Riedl interview for Adventure Gamers

It is somewhat rare to find a full-blown interview from Her Interactive done with a focus on a particular game, but on May 11, 2005, Adventure Gamers published an interview with Robert Ridel and Megan Gaiser done in promotion for Secret of the Old Clock.

You can read it at the link above, or here below. Some interesting notes from this interview:

During Stay Tuned for Danger, the development team visited a local TV station to get references.

Secret of the Old Clock featured Kevin Manthei bringing in live performers instead of the music being mixed in studio.

An explanation as to why the games were made with 2D backgrounds and 3D characters

Some of the background on Her Interactive as a company

Written by Laura MacDonald — May 11, 2005

We have another mystery. The place: Titusville. Nancy Drew, famous girl sleuth, is on her way to see Emily Crandall, an old friend. Emily has inherited the charming Lilac Inn, but all is not picture perfect. Instead, things are terribly wrong, and after receiving a desperate call for help, Nancy is soon speeding along in her blue roadster, blonde hair shining, on her way to her very first mystery.

Wait a minute…blonde hair?…roadster? Yes, you heard right. Unlike the previous games in this successful adventure series, this isn't the Nancy of today -- this is the original girl detective in the 1930s. Nancy made her book debut in a story called The Secret of the Old Clock, and this year, she is celebrating 75 years of sleuthing through danger and mystery. We think that deserves a little extra attention, and who better to talk about all things Nancy Drew than Her Interactive's CEO, Megan Gaiser, and Executive Producer, Robert Riedl.

LM: Hi, Megan. It is a pleasure to talk with you today.

MG: Nice to be here, Laura. Robert [Riedl] is also here with me for the interview. He heads up product development and designed many of our products as well.

LM: Hi, Robert! Megan, I wanted to start by asking you to touch briefly on your background. You started out in documentary film making; how did that lead you into the game industry?

MG: Yes, I was an editor and producer of educational documentaries for 11 years in Washington D.C., which is an interesting background to take into gaming. One of the reasons I wanted to get into multi-media was to get out of the editing room. I was intrigued by the non-linear nature of multi-media. There are also a lot of similarities between creating games and film, which we apply to creating the Nancy Drew games. The content needs to be compelling, with rich character development. The music and the environment all have to contribute. It is this synergy of components that have made the games work and make it easy to become immersed in the world.

As an editor and producer, I became really intrigued with the fact that there are so many different kinds of women. The same should hold true in the games offered to the female market. [At Her Interactive]... we are always saying there needs to be as many types of entertainment for girls and women as there are preferences. They tend to stereotype and pigeonhole women, which is why there's always been such a struggle to prove this market. Which is kind of ridiculous, because we're, you know, half the population. They target females for books and music, so why would they stop at computers?

LM: I know Her Interactive started independently, then you signed with DreamCatcher. Later you pulled back out and signed what looks like a one-game deal with Atari. Then you went the self-publishing route. I noticed a few retailers have Atari listed as your publisher. Are you still self-publishing?

MG: Just to back up on the story, we published our first Nancy Drew game in 1998. We had taken it to all the publishers and they said, "No, we aren't going to take it because all females are computer-phobic and they will never play video games."

They all thought there was no market for females in the interactive arts and entertainment media market. We were at a critical point as a company and we believed in our game. So, we decided if we can't get in the front door, we'll go around the back. We went to Amazon, learned how to self-publish, and the games took off. A high point was when the NY Times called that first game the "Un-Barbie of computer games." After that, our games were awarded consecutive gold Parents' Choice awards. Suddenly, those same publishers came back to us wanting to sign a retail deal. In 2000, we signed a publishing arrangement with DreamCatcher. Two years later, we made the giant step of becoming the retail publisher of our own games. That was the key right there, and was a huge step for the company. We selected Atari as our distributor.

LM: So you used them as a distributor only.

MG: That is what they are this year as well. We haven't changed that. We are still the publisher and this is a continuation of that same arrangement.

LM: Nancy Drew has appeared in books, but under a different character name, in countries other than the U.S. She has a similar fan base there as well. Have you considered selling the games in those countries?

MG: We actually have. She is the most popular in Sweden, where her name is Kitty Drew. In France, she appears as Alice Roy. We are speaking with people about localizing the series to France right now. We are doing one territory at a time, because the cost of localization is so high. Before you put resources and money behind localization, you want to make sure the move makes sense. France will probably be the first, and then Sweden.

LM: I know it is the 75th anniversary for the series, which began when The Secret of the Old Clock was first published in 1930. I assume that is why you are doing a classic Nancy Drew mystery and using the very first one ever written as the inspiration for this game. For that game, how did you handle the time period? Where did you go for your research, and what did you look to for inspiration in recreating the 1930s world of Nancy Drew?

RR: Like we would do with any character, we do a lot of research into the geography, into historical aspects. We would go to the library and get visual references there, as well as information on the era. We try to go to locations, as well, that we can use as inspiration for puzzles or content. For example, with Stay Tuned For Danger, we went to a local television station and got reference material from there. We always try to give a really good sense of the era or the locale. Not only with visual aspects, but the language, scenes, puzzle content, etc.

LM: Are you using the same source for your music?

RR: We are using Kevin Manthei, who has been our composer ever since the first installment. For this title, he brought in live performers.

LM: The music for this game will be recorded live instead of being mixed in the studio? That's great. Any chance of a music CD available from the game?

MG: We are looking into that!

LM: On the other upcoming game, there has been some mild confusion about what it is called. What exactly is the title of the upcoming Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew game?

MG: Last Train To Blue Moon Canyon.

LM: Will the Hardy Boys be physically present in the game?

MG: Yes, they will.

LM: Will we play multiple characters or as Nancy Drew, in first-person only?

RR: Stay tuned! [laughter]

LM: Okay, I can see that information isn't for public consumption yet. When can we expect to see these two new titles released?

MG: The Secret of the Old Clock is scheduled to ship in late July this year, and Last Train To Blue Moon Canyon is scheduled in late September.

LM: You have always tweaked your games a little bit; experimented here and there. You also started having some "actiony" feeling moments or more dynamic timed challenges in them. Are we going to see challenges like this, and possibly a bit more of them in the Hardy Boys game?

RR: We always try to challenge our players a little bit with each new game. So we will venture out and mix it up a little bit, so it doesn't feel stale or formulaic. We are trying to do something a little bit different and see how it goes, and also improve upon the product as well. Because you may have a good idea, but you just have to get it right.

LM: Blackmoor Manor had a more non-linear flow to the gameplay than previous games. Are we going to see this model of gameplay repeated in either or both of the new titles?

RR: It is purely a style preference. We have different designers coming into play and marketing has different requirements. In Curse, for example, we wanted it to be really challenging. What is the mood; what are the five main elements we want to convey with this game, and then that dictate our choices in all aspects of the gameplay. Complexity of puzzles, narrative, the locations... how we treat the location. Is the emotive component light or more intense? Is it a gothic horror or is more of a caper? And it is nice to do this, so we have a mix. We want people to be surprised by the title. So they think "wow, this has a feel of novelty."

LM: How do you decide what the next title is going to do?

RR: It is really the lead designer's responsibility and choice on how they do that. Everyone does give input. The designer will say, "I am going to choose the next game. Give me input as to what you would like to see in environments, type of artwork, and the particular era." We get these parameters and people will give out titles. There are certain perennial titles that come up every time we look at the books. The lead designer will read through a lot of stories. Everyone in the office will have their favorite(s). The designer will also have his or her favorite. Then we have a meeting with our advisory panel. We will say, "Okay, pitch an idea, come to the meeting with a book that you think would be really neat." From all that, we whittle it down to one selection. We take the top five choices and submit them to Megan, marketing, and the lead designer. Also, what we have done in the past affects the choice as well.

LM: That makes sense, to guarantee a mix of the plots from game to game. I know you have a teen advisory board that you use in-house. Who is on it? How was it formed?

RR: They are local, but we do have some who are out of state. We sort of advertise it on our site. It is comprised of about 40 people. They correspond roughly with what our current market is. So 30% are adult women. We also have some men and boys on it, as well. I see them as almost another department of our company. It has become a source for inspiration and ideas.

LM: About your publishing schedule, it seems like you keep to a very steady routine of two games each year -- the summer being Nancy Drew lite and the fall title providing the more challenging experience. Any intentions of expanding the production past these two games a year?

MG: We are looking to expand the product offering with another series of games. We are in talks with a couple of different licensors and we're on the verge of making that step.

LM: Any hints in what direction this is?

MG: We can't discuss it in more detail until it's a done deal.

LM: While some developers have made the move into 3D, you have made a design choice to stick with 2D backgrounds and 3D characters; the so-called 2.5D look. Why is this?

RR: The original impetus for going into 2D backgrounds is you get a lot more detail out of the artwork. Even now, when you are in a 3D world, you can't get that same detail to the environment. Also the type of play lends itself better to the 2D environments, because in a 3D world it is all about movement. Action or movement is a very important component to the gameplay. You are running away or you're chasing something. In our games, our players say they like to kind of graze. They like to take their time without feeling pressured. They want to amble about in the environments and explore. They want to become totally engrossed in the environment. So for that reason, we went with 2D and continue to use it. The other problem is that 3D doesn't actually work with this sort of gameplay and our market. Those that have gone with 3D, there is a lot of backlash against it. Broken Sword 3, URU… I just don't see the benefit to going to a 3D engine at this time.

LM: E3 is on the horizon next week, so I wanted to ask you about that. I noticed that the German equivalent in Liepseig has a much different approach than E3. They have a much more family-focused presentation vs. E3, which is pretty wild and woolly and at times seems more of a industry party or club mentality. I wanted to toss out a quote from a recent article on the show in LA and get your reaction.

"E3 should be about innovation; it should be about the games. Let's make sure the voice E3 is supposed to promote is not lost in the fury of silicon and peep shows."

Any reaction or thoughts on that sentiment?

MG: Actually, it is interesting you brought that up because we have been kicking it around here. The issue of responsibility for the content of games we develop is getting a lot of attention.

RR: I think E3 has gotten a lot better. GOD (Gathering of Developers) no longer has the lesbian nuns across from Staples anymore. I kind of have mixed feelings. On one hand, our hardcore gamers are young men and a lot of the content caters towards them. I think that's okay. There are other things being pushed at E3 like the Nintendo display and the various attendees located in Kentia Hall. Those guys can't afford the booth babes and there's a lot of interesting things going on down there. Sometimes you can find a gem in the rough.

MG: All I can say to that is tradeshows -- any tradeshow -- are all about glitz and over-the-top showboating. And we're in the entertainment industry! Pair that with the fact that this industry has historically been male-dominated, and I don't think sexism is any surprise. I will add this. We're seeing a steady increase in the amount of women playing games, creating them, marketing them, and producing them. As the ranks fill out with women, sexism will ebb off as this industry continues to become more gender-balanced. However, creativity is the great equalizer. Girls and women provide a fresh perspective and generate entirely new parameters for creative development... Listen to them.

LM: I couldn't agree more! Thank you so much for taking the time to share your thoughts with all of us at AG.

MG & RR: Thank you, Laura, and all the adventure gamers for your continued support!

[hamliet]

Wait what, how did Attack on Titain's narrative get accused of being interlocked with fascism?

I'm sorry I'm new to this since when did AoT ever visualize direct support of such a thing? I'm so so confused, it's a story COMBATTInG that exact thing??

I think a couple things, two of which I find sympathetic but still incorrect, and the rest of which--the main reasons--I find exasperating.

Main reason: people can't read well and don't understand framing. This is a very real phenomenon among younger generations (Z and below). If a story is about something, it's automatically seen as endorsing it. Just look at social media and the anti movement, or at problems plaguing YA literature and harassment towards authors.

In this kind of environment, where portrayal=endorsement, the concept of a tragic protagonist is especially anathema to people--if a protagonist does something, surely it's endorsed! Except, Shakespeare would like a word. Historically, this isn't the case in literature, and it's not the case in AoT either.

Now, to be fair, something coming out in a monthly fashion may mean that parts seem ambiguous at the time since we don't have teh full picture. However, I don't think AoT was ever ambiguous and never made me feel like it would endorse Eren, so while I can understand occasional confusion, I can't understand ever thinking it was even close to endorsing it especially after Mikasa's "that's already... unforgivable" line in 101.

The parts I am sympathetic to are these:

Isayama, in like 2013, posted an image of a Japanese military figure in WWII or something. I forget the details. This man is taught as a hero to Japanese students. To the rest of the world, he's uh, a war criminal. Isayama I believe deleted this? and at any rate never did it again. Still, I'm not going to defend this. I empathize with people who still live under the effects of brutal Japanese imperialist occupation, for which Japan still hasn't taken responsibility. Yet as someone who grew up in America in a cult where I had to unlearn basically everything, I'm also sympathetic to a man who was in his young-mid 20s who grew up with a perspective that was very different and appeared to learn from it. It's like a lot of Americans grow up hearing great things about Winston Churchill and George Washington and Thomas Jefferson, only to then realize in your 20s the Bad Things they did, like slavery and assault and more. Also, these things were not as widely available (via the internet) to people growing up at Isayama's age (he's just a little older than I am) as they are now. So I see this as a man learning. Yes, there's privilege there, but that's not something he can help, and it's a project to do the work unpacking it--which to all accounts he appears to actually be doing. It's nonsensical to assume that someone who ever speaks positively of a historical figure is actually endorsing their worldview. If the story did endorse it, that'd be different--but it doesn't.

The armbands. I have talked about it before and won't get into it, but I won't ever defend that use of the armband (it's incredibly insensitive) while also thinking that its use is not remotely an endorsement (framing-wise, it isn't) and also thinking that someone raised in Japan, again, doesn't learn nearly as much about the Holocaust as someone in the west does.

Even with those things, being angry about them or offended is one thing, and thinking the story endorses fascism as a result of it is another. I can defend why I called BNHA a fascist-esque story in the end tying it into the themes and messaging. I've yet to see someone do this with SnK because it's blatantly anti fascist--though, it is a story told within the foibles and limits of coming from one man's background.

Also, to quote @aspoonofsugar, I think the most blatant evidence it's anti-fascist is looking at who hated the ending. Answer: fascists. Young, alienated men angry that their hero, who was written to represent them, turned out not to be the hero of the story and as a tragic, hurting child throwing a tantrum. Raise your hand if you recognize any of our real-world fascists in that.

Edit: An Anon gave the details for the picture of the Japanese imperialist: From Tv Tropes; Dot Pixis's character stirred an outrage among the Korean fanbase, especially when Isayama admitted that he was based off of Akiyama Yoshifuru, a historical general of the Imperial Japanese Army who has a complicated and controversial history in Korea. This resulted in a heated debate over the general's war record, angry messages and even death threats towards Isayama, as well as an overall decline of interest in the series in Korea due to what they saw as Isayama glorifying the man.

Thanks to Anon for the details; I'd forgotten. My opinion on it remains the same.

[avus-circuit]

pullpin fic rapidly approaching 20k... here is a snippet

The 2028 Formula 1 season kicks off on March 10th in Australia, and Doriane has never felt so much like a zoo animal. 

It was bad in testing—it was bad in F2, and F3, and F4, and F1 Academy, and WEC—but this is like nothing before. Everyone is fucking learing at her, constantly. Not so much the drivers—or, at least, not all of them. Ugo is a rookie along with her this year, and he’s had some time to get used to her, so have Alex (Powell), and Dino, to a certain extent, he’s lived with Maya so he knows how to act—but most of the male media personnel, some of the more… enthusiastic fans, and a lot of mechanics and other team members. The Audi people are great, pretty much universally (some of the mechanics on Logan’s side of the garage seem… uncomfortable, but Doriane isn’t working with them, so it’s fine). 

Their eyes are just… Constant, from the moment Doriance comes into view. Logan seems to be trying to distract her from the fact everyone is always looking, trying at every turn to catch her attention, though not in a way that makes her think of anything more than a little kid who can tell something’s wrong, whose only course of action is distraction. 

It’s working, a little bit. At the very least, Doriane appreciates the effort. It’s kind. 

Media day is the worst of the weekend, though. When Doriane can get in the car, when she can drown everything out in the roaring of engines—F2 is here, and F3, so the sounds of the cars are pretty constant, and always soothing. Doriane has always loved the sound of this sport, the smell of it, the feeling it gave the air. 

The car is… Fine. Doriane has had better cars, and certainly she has had worse cars, done good things in worse cars. They won’t be looking for podiums, not on normal weekends, but points should be coming consistently. It will be okay. 

Doriane knows, with this chance, Abbi would be able to do so much more than Doriane knows she will achieve. With this chance, she could have already done it so much better. So much more in the way of progress, so much for the rest of non-men in motorsports. Doriane is an activist because she has to be, a historian because she has to be, a symbol because she has to be. Abbi was made for these roles, made to be the figurehead of this community. 

They want Doriane’s body, but they need Abbi’s mind. Where Doriane does her job as a woman in this world with a sense of duty, learns the past so well she dreams in black and white and the faded yellow of Lella Lombardi’s car with an air of necessity, and crafts herself to a picture of perseverance like a soldier going to war, Abbi enjoys these tasks. Enjoys the process of creating a god, creating the ideal of divinity needed to survive. She likes to learn the history, loves to fight people about women’s place in this high tower, and enjoys every second of promised godhood, every tiny drop of ambrosia that the world supplies her. 

Abbi would thrive in this environment for all the reasons Doriane loves her—she is loud and happy and bubbling and relentlessly joyful, in the face of everything. (Lately, that shine had been wearing, at least in private, but.) Abbi was sunshine, she was light, and she lived for the roar of the crowd the way Doriane lived for the roar of the engine. 

TELL ME YOUR FAVORITE LINE I BEG OF YOU <3

[makingspiritualityreal]

I had an interesting conversation with my friend recently and she claims my observations were valuable and should be shared with others.

The context of the conversation was from a phenomenon that we can see on social media recently that criticizes “nice people” and says that “they don’t get what they want” while “bad people get their way”. I have seen many pseudo spiritual teachers preach something similar, but all that it does is preys on people’s anger and resentment and has nothing to do with truly figuring out the vibration of the Universe.

The Universe responds to the frequency of our true intentions and is aware of the truth in all situations, thus it can’t be tricked. And from that comes a very important realization, that being “nice” is not equal to being good.

The other important truth is that this Universe operates within a certain harmony and is not kept forever “out of check”. Thus, it is impossible to infinitely commit destructive actions with no reaction from our environment.

Most people are nice habitually, but it is an action directed at social adherence, devoid of depth of feeling. How many of us can really say that they wake up with a genuine feeling of goodness in their hearts every day, even in difficult situations? It is not only impossible, it is not required of us. If we polled a “vibrational” monthly average there are people out there with foundational goodness of character, but sadly so few of them compared to those who are simply superficially nice. And for those who radiate genuine goodness, it always ultimately comes back in some form. Those who are only “nice” on the surface but sulk about how bad life is to them are dishonest about the true motivations of their character.

The discernment about people called “bad” is necessary, because very few human beings are genuinely bad people. People are complex and have different aspects to their personality. Someone can be a very successful worker and make a lot of money but treat people in their personal life poorly, and their life will ultimately reflect that. This is the problem with the perception of “bad” behaviors - their seeming victories are short lived. You will see that while up until a certain age these kind of people have enough energy to keep repeating their mistakes, they never gain any long term payoff from their bad behavior.

To show you an example, this is the reason why totalitarian leaders ultimately fail and face opposition, because while they power they way through short term victories, they don’t achieve long term respect, as it would require a certain integrity, so the opposition they attract makes them fail.

Genuine goodness is something very fragile, hard to build and easy to shatter. It requires effort and self discipline, yet gives unique results. It is irrational to say that people who don’t work on themselves at all will get the same results as people who refine their character on a regular basis.

If you need an example to put this in perspective, think of a relationship you have with someone, that is bound by negative attachment. Most of us are born with certain difficult karmas, so we go through at least one such experience in this lifetime. You may be temporarily bound to them, you may be afraid or unable to escape them, but if someone has not been good to you, they have shattered your genuine love for them a long time ago. Love and attachment is not the same, and once good feelings between people are destroyed, you can’t really manipulate your way out of it, as deep inside a person’s heart something is irrevocably changed.

That’s why goodness and trust is so rare and so precious. Because, unlike what the modern media tries to tell us, there is really no cheat code to bypass the truth and the effort required to create something genuine. Being good is not about weakness, it’s about hard work, and few people really achieve it.

[wroteclassicaly]

All these people in the gator and fargo tag complaining of people thirsting over gator, calling him a nazi and how dare people find the humanity in him but praising joe for his great job like he didnt find the humanity in this character and played him to be someone you feel for. 🤡

Then being pro munch like he doesnt have problematic traditional values either

Honestly so tired of these people virtue signaling and having no nuance or media literacy for the sake of internet points, its exhausting and they just look annoying and stupid

Okay, so I wasn’t sure if I was going to answer this, because I’m trying to stay out of things. But I’ve gotten several messages like this, and I’m writing for Gator, so I feel like I owe my take on him, which had a major influence on my choice to continue.

TW below the cut, discussing Gator and his issues:

I live in a Midwestern, republican town. Everyone here owns flags like Gator’s, has blue lives matter flags, etc. If you’re raised into that life and it’s all your family knows/the people around you know - you will likely adapt to that way of thinking as well. I was fortunate enough to be able to break away from how the people around me thought and felt, forming my own opinions and expressing my disgust for the blue lives matter crap and the flag, etc. My parents are heavily republican (carry all that side’s beliefs) and so is my brother.

It’s an incredibly suffocating and confusing environment to grow up in, especially if you have no way to safely think and form your own opinions. Again, I’m grateful I could break away and think for myself!!!!

Now, discussing Gator. I just want to say that it never said he was a Nazi! Roy was. Gator was misogynistic and racist.

I’m going to compare Gator to a character called Mickey Milkovich (now this will probably upset people, due to Mickey’s character being a gay man), but I’m mostly comparing fathers/environments. Mickey and Gator were raised by two dangerous and horrific men, who beat and brain washed their sons into one way of thinking - theirs. Products of their environment, (Mickey used slurs, had flags like Gator, weapons, drugs, and even had nazi items on his wall) and what is called ‘learned racism’. They have no safe way to think for themselves, no other people around to show them love or kindness, help lead them towards a different way. Mickey found that with Ian and was able to develop and fully nurture the kindness/goodness that was in him, and he had over ten seasons to grow!

Gator only had Nadine and 10 episodes. When she left he began to let his warped devotion to the only person he had a blood connection with - flood him, outweigh his own personal goodness. Dot said it herself when she said his need to be like Roy outweighed the goodness inside. He was a product of the father and the environment. He didn’t have his own way of thinking, not really, he clung to what was beat and brainwashed into him, trying to find love and approval from his abuser/only blood relative/only person he was around (very common).

Am I excusing that? Absolutely not! Gator was not entirely a good person, and he knew that as well! He made choices he knew were wrong, to impress and gain affection from a sociopathic, demonic man. Gator was responsible for what he did, so this is not me trying to excuse or argue that!!

The only way for him to become free of who he was molded to be (he has no clue who he is, just a weak prototype of what he tried to be, hardly anything that is his own), was for him to become blind in order to see, and start serving his time. They left his ending open, which is a great way for those of us who choose to write for him - to explore his mental freedom and further nurture the soft/good side of him!

We don’t know how Gator would act or think (he was immediately apologetic to Dot and didn’t hesitate to give Roy up when he saw he wasn’t loved or cared for, so he didn’t need to protect his father), now that he is away from the environment and the man that molded him into the character he was on the show.

Gator was still a child trapped in a man’s body in some aspects; his temper tantrums, his knee jerk reactions, his hot headed plans without thought, his bedroom items (the toy cars, the sneakers, etc), his blinding anger towards Dot for leaving him behind (not even faulting her, because baby girl needed to get out and I’m glad she did). The show also alluded to the fact that he might have been addicted to some kind of substance he was stealing, as well.

Feelings on Munch are that he’s got just as much issues, lol. And we hardly knew much on him, tbh? What he did in the past, other than what he said.

Anyways, that’s my take on Gator.

We all have the right to feel how we feel!! Hate or love Gator, see his humanity or not. Some of the things his character represented effect a whole lot of people, so they have a right to be upset! There’s a lot of different factors and feelings involved!! I only look sideways at you if you thought his torture and eyes getting burnt/cut was what he deserved, because that’s just gross!

But at the end of the day, none of us who do love Gator/write for him — condone Gator’s actions! Seeing the layers and humanity in a character Joe put his all into, is perfectly normal/okay!

Sometimes there’s areas in between, and it’s not just either/or.

But I will say that not everyone who feels this way is just doing it for internet points! A lot of people have valid points/feelings about the dislike of Gator, to which I will not/have no business arguing, you know? There’s also other people that make callout posts for clout and false superiority, without even recognizing what Gator actually did and they just pull stuff outta their ass, lol.

If you don’t like Gator fans or writers, then just scroll!! It’s easy, I promise! No one is hurting anyone or being malicious!! ❤️

[shippingmyworld]

What are your headcanons on how Danny and Sam's relationship ended? I'm interested on how you see Danny's background because I really like how you write him! He's just so *devours him in the way an animal would eat meat and leaves a clean bone behind*

A wild animal devouring a corpse, to my writing? *sniffles* that's so kind of you to say =D

I kinda touched on how I think the Sam x Danny ship sunk a little bit in this ask here, but your ask got me thinking about it again. I've gone a bit more into detail below the cut (apologies for the word vomit because it's a lot lol)

There are a few factors that I think played into the ending of Sam and Danny's relationship, but I think the biggest part of it would be that Sam takes a step away from ghost hunting as time goes gone. I mentioned that I think Danny and Sam's relationship lasted like 4 months tops following the shows finale. That's because I think that big ghost activity died down following Phantom Planet. There's an unspoken truce that holds between the Ghost Zone and Amity Park for a while. Ghosts still cross over now and then to fulfill their desires and feed of human emotions, but the haunting stuff is mostly harmless now (i.e., Ember crashes a few open mic nights to play music, Lunch Lady breaks into restaurants right before opening to do kitchen prep work, Box Ghost rearranges the contents of warehouses overnight to his own liking). Since this stuff is all sort of juvenile annoyance now, Tucker and Sam don't really need to tag along to help Danny. In fact, most of the time that they do tag along, Danny just has to frown at the offending ghost and they'll begrudgingly fly themselves back to the Ghost Zone without a fight.

Now that ghost hunting is more or less 'boring' and require no effort from Tucker and Sam, they start focusing on their own things. I think that with Sam's personality, she wouldn't want to simply ride through life on her families wealth. She'd want to double down on her studies and get into a college that could help her get out and actually make a change in the world (I personally see her trying to get a double degree in Sustainably Sciences and Zoology or something so she can work with endangered animals and better their society for the environment). I think Tucker would be the type of person to try and capitalize on how fast technology and social media is growing and try and make his living that way. The show takes place vaguely between 2005 and 2009, when stuff like YouTube is in its infancy after all. I personally feel that with his personality (and vanity), he'd absolutely eat up the attention being an internet personality naturally comes with and would want to dedicate himself fully to cultivating it.

Inadvertently, cutting down on ghost hunting to focus on their own desires means that they're cutting also down on Danny time.

When Tucker turns down a ghost hunt with Danny the first time, it doesn't affect Danny that much. After all, their relationship hasn't changed. They're still best friends, and they've had years to get to know each other. When Sam however, turns down Danny the first time, it becomes a very big deal and strikes painfully in Danny's heart in a way he wasn't expecting. After all, their relationship as a couple is still new at this point. Being boyfriend and girlfriend is still uncharted waters. Danny expected some change, but Sam acting the same as normal makes him start to question if this is the kind of romantic relationship he wants.

Danny is over-protective (Jazz with Johnny 13, Sam with Gregor, Maddie with Vlad), which I believe is a sign that Danny is codependent to a slightly unhealthy degree. He wouldn't be aware of this facet of his personality at this point in time, simply because Tucker and/or Sam have always been at his side when it came to ghost hunting. But once Sam innocently sends him off to deal with the hunt on his own (she thinks nothing of it, just that she's really got to get home and study for this test next week), Danny's perception of Sam changes. He becomes hyperaware that she's her own human person, with her own dreams and ambitions that are different from his own.

It's not immediate, but the intrusive thoughts start to fester in the back of his mind. Sam can simply step away from ghost activity when she wants to. Hell, she could move out of Amity Park and away from this ghost hot spot (which she will probably do with her ambition of wanting to change the world). Danny however, can't. He'll literally always be aware of ghost activity, no matter where he is, because he himself is half-ghost. Doesn't that mean that Sam might chose to step away from him one day? If she wants to take a break from ghosts, then that means she wants a break from Danny, doesn't it? Danny doesn't voice these concerns though, letting them warp his thoughts and perceptions until it quickly becomes a 'fact' inside his head that Sam will leave him one day. He'll realize that he doesn't want Sam to walk out of his life because she's important to him, which only gives him more reason to not communicate these feelings because that will accelerate her departure.

However, that opens up a whole new can of worms because why is she someone that's just 'Important to him?' Doesn't he love her? Yes, absolutely, she's irreplaceable. But does that mean he loves her romantically, or platonically? Is she just a convenient replacement for the lingering affections he had for Valarie (yes but he won't admit it)? The longer he lets himself think about it and reflect on what he wants out of a romantic relationship, the more he will close himself off because he doesn't want to accidentally say the wrong thing and lose Sam.

Sam however, isn't as dense as Danny thinks she is. She quickly notices that something is bothering him. However, the first few times she tries broaching the subject, Danny shuts down. Sam will chose to drop the conversation immediately after the first rejection and wait for Danny to feel comfortable enough to share his feeling with her. However, this isn't what Danny wants. Danny wants someone that will call him on his bullshit, someone that will storm through the Ghost Zone if need be, someone as headstrong as he is that will pester him into opening up about what's bother him because that shows that they are actually concerned about his well-being.

(*Cough* Manny-no-tact-Rivera *Cough*)

It's not enough for someone to just physically be there with him. Danny's love language is seeing/hearing someone show concern for him, stuff like words of affirmation and choosing to actively engage and talk about both halves of his life. This is important to him, especially since I believe he's very self-conscious about the ghost half of his life. He doesn't show it, but all hatred the town and his parents showed towards ghosts in his early years deeply affected him; he wants someone to talk to about this half of his life because it will make him more comfortable with himself.

Since Sam believes the right thing to do is back down, this causes more strife their relationship. And what's terrible about it isn't because they don't like each other, it's simply because their perceptions of a healthy relationship are fundamentally different and they haven't been able to communicate this to each other. Danny believes that a good relationship is a partnership with both partners willingly engage and are involved in pretty much every aspect of each other's lives; whereas Sam believes that each person in the relationship should be independent to a large degree and respect the boundaries that their partner sets.

Incidentally, Danny subconsciously puts a pin this train of thought and references it later when questioning his own sexuality; when he's reflecting on it all later (once the dust from his and Sam's breakup settles) he realizes that the gender of the person he's with doesn't matter to him. What matters to him is everything above (I headcanon Danny as identifying as Demisexual and Biromantic).

As time goes on, Sam and Danny's relationship continues to sour. Just like how Danny's letting his emotions and intrusive thoughts fester, Sam is too. She's starting to get upset that Danny's not sharing whatever is bothering him with her. Does that mean he doesn't trust her enough to be vulnerable and honest with her? Again, neither person is communicating this with each other, and they start to not enjoy each other's company.

Then, the whole thing comes to a head during a trio game night. Tucker, Sam, and Danny are playing an online co-op. Sam and Danny can't seem to get it together, resulting in Tucker going 1v3 against the enemy team. When Tucker asks why their coordination sucks, Sam's annoyance with losing the game will make her remark about how Danny needs to communicate more when something is bothering him (referring to the fact he's getting spawn camped, but also their relationship). Danny shots back a remark about how she needs to be more aware of when something is happening to her team and stop focusing solely on her own task (the spawn camper and their relationship again). The passive-aggressive remarks escalate until it becomes a full blown shouting match and eventually they end up saying they both think they should break up mid-match.

Meanwhile poor Tucker is just sitting there listening to them argue on headset like:

I already mentioned in the other ask that Danny and Sam would eventually reconcile, talk, and remain friends (thanks to Tucker getting annoyed at them) so I won't retype all that here. Instead, I'm going to throw in that I think following the break-up, Danny would lean much heavier into his friendship with Tucker.

I think Danny would ugly cry in Tucker's arms following his breakup with Sam, believing that he's forever lost someone important that's been in his life since second grade (and as a high school teenager barely 15 years old at this point, that's pretty much his entire life). He basically lets everything he was holding back from Sam spill to Tucker in the most dramatic version emotional sobbing. Tucker's gotta verbally reassure him that he's not going to walk out of Danny's life, even if he becomes some techno billionaire one day. This does actually help Danny calm down and start to think rationally again, instead of emotionally.

In fact, this sob session is what start Tucker on the path to wanting to make his friends reconcile again because he knows that the whole situation came about from poor communication. When he does get Sam and Danny to talk it out, it ends up being one of those really deep conversation you have at slumber parties at like 3am when no one can sleep. They end up talking about the future they all want, what they all value in their lives, and basically reaffirming their friendship with each other. Sam and Danny agree that what they want out of a romantic relationship with someone is fundamentally different, so they should just be friends instead. They also agree they both have some unhealthy habits, and that they will call each other on them should they ever see the other person fall into them again.

Tucker meanwhile says this will make great content for his channel, and Sam and Danny both instantly turn on Tucker and says they'll sue if he uploads anything about them.

[bodysnatch3r]

putting this under a read more because i have nowhere else to put it. this ended up being long! mostly i am Processing.

i think what's fucking me up about veilguard being so polarising is that i have no way to make my own value judgement. i can't play it, at all, full stop. consoles are expensive, i live paycheck-to-paycheck and realistically speaking cannot even begin to think about buying a current gen console until well into 2025. i was saving up and then in june shit happened and those savings had to be used for something else and my stipend got reduced by a couple dozen pounds and the bills went up. so it goes.

i do not want to watch someone play it because it is just antithetical to how i relate to dragon age as media, and besides anyone posting playthroughs is inundated with critical comments. and the result is that the usual mechanisms i have against brainworms concerning certain types of critical statements—knowing i can fall back on my own experiences with the games and my own judgements of where the writing succeeded or didn't, what story am i trying to tell through these interactive games, how do i reconcile it with the story the devs were trying to tell, where does it diverge, etc.—are totally inaccessible to me.

this would have been fine, i think, if the fandom consensus i've been seeing hadn't been mostly "either you hate it or love it with no in between. and if you think the opposite of me you are Stupid". which. well i guess ten years in the fandom have taught me Nothing. but i digress.

i would have been fine, because i know from experience that i am often satisfied with scraps that others may find lacking—for example, i think dai quickly dropping and flattening the mage/templar conflict into a couple of missions in the hinterlands was fine, because we have several books that hint at and deal with the larger-branching consequences of da2. much of my fan experience is, generally, concerned with where i can "fill in the blanks" because that is what interests me the most. i thrive in the corners and margins. the less i know, the more i can take what canon gives us and run.

plus, over the years i have developed a tendency to meet bioware where they are at. past experience in creative industries has really shown to me how stifling any form of artmaking can be in a corporate environment, and i know that right now the blame as to why we got veilguard and not joplin is being passed around like a hot potato, but the truth of the matter is, we will never know beyond the fact that bioware management is beholden, like all companies, to the "number go up" capitalist doctrine, no doubt reinforced by their parent company ea. and that, at least following the failure of anthem and andromeda (but i suspect from even earlier, as david gaider has said), bioware has been the ugly duckling of ea's roster. (as an aside, i would love to know who in ea has such a soft spot for bioware, that they allowed them to continue on following those massive failures.)

what i am trying to say is, i have been struggling so much with something i had managed to heal myself from, precisely because the one coping mechanism that does work for me (stewing in the source material) is totally inaccessible to me. so i have all of this antsy, nervous, conflicted energy, exacerbated by my own obsessive tendencies and the fact that sometimes having a childhood hyperfixation return full force as an adult just really fucking sucks when my personality is prone to regressing into harmful thought patterns and behaviours—is it as bad as people are saying? will it be a massive disappointment when i finally do play it? should i even like it when apparently it is such a slap in the face to the fans?—and nowhere to put it.

i kind of preferred it when we all thought this game was just never going to come out and i had made peace with it.