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Mentor Starscream x seeker!reader (4/?)
Purposely getting yourself kidnapped by the Autobots so you can persuade Ratchet to teach you some first aid, as you're worried that Megatron's escalating violence against Starscream will one day leave him with injuries you don't know how to fix.
There's more Ratchet in the middle (because I love him as well. I want to hold both of them in my hands with gentol totche.)
Mashup of timelines as usual, but I def realized that when I imagine Starscream he's visually the G1 or IDW design, and when I imagine Ratchet it's TFP. I love MTMTE Ratchet but I'm not quite caught up yet haha.
Since you and Starscream were now sharing a berth, it was inevitable that he would find out about the nightmares. Every time you jerked awake, you would take great pains to quietly settle back into berth even if recharge eluded you. The reason was simple - you didn't want to bother Starscream with it. He gets very little recharge as is, and probably sees things every solar cycle that are ten times worse that what you're faced with.
Starscream doesn't comment, if he knows - another bot might have rushed to console you, but his brand of comfort was to apparently grant you the dignity of being vulnerable in private, especially since you were more or less chassis to chassis with each other in berth.
However, he finally can't hold back when you begin zoning out during training. "Earth to cadet, as the fleshlings say," Starscream snapped, waving a servo in front of your faceplate. You jerk awake, optics cycling before they zero in woozily on Starscream's faceplate. Pinched with irritation, but was that... concern?
You lightly smack your helm in hopes it'll get your processor back to optimum function. No such luck, but it was worth a try. "Sorry, sir."
He narrows his optics at you, taking in the exhausted slump of your frame. For a long moment, no one says anything.
Then, Starscream abruptly turns heel, his back to you. "Dismissed."
But - but you've been here for barely a joor, and - "Sir, please, it won't happen again-"
"And waste my time and yours?" Starscream says bluntly. You flinch, but he just presses on.
"You're in no condition to absorb the information I am giving you, which, if I may add, is exceedingly valuable to your success as a seeker. Recharge properly, and perhaps your processor will be able to comprehend simple instructions such as 'stay awake'." He sniffs, but glances over his shoulder at you - and his optics are gentler.
"We will try our luck again then."
Your first response is to sag with relief even as you watch him stride away, because he wasn't giving up on you. Your second response, however, is that of pure consternation.
The nightmares have gotten worse.
Ever since you had to personally patch Starscream up as he bled out on the floor of his habsuite, the nightmares have gotten so much worse. There are momentary flashes of hate in your processor for Megatron, but they are quickly tamped down by fear. Even your mind is not a safe place, after all, with Soundwave here.
The memory of Starscream, broken and battered at your feet, replays over and over. In some of your nightmares, he is exactly as you found him - gouges in his frame, ripped wires, leaking energon. But just as you thought you'd gotten used to the memory (he's not like that anymore. He's alive and well. He's not like that anymore.), your processor decided to play tricks of the worst kind on you. Offering all kinds of ways Starscream could be hurt, in full technicolour detail, optics shuttered and frame unnaturally still. Worst of all, you could only watch as your processor conjured injuries beyond your rudimentary expertise, that Starscream could very well succumb to because you didn't know how to save him.
That night, the image in your processor is so bad that you bolt upright with coolant already leaking from your optics. You swipe roughly at your faceplates as the memory continues to remain fresh in your mind, fighting to get your trembling frame under control.
You turn to look at the bot next to you, if only to reassure yourself that he's okay, assuming he would be in recharge - but to your surprise, a pair of glowing red optics meet your frantic gaze.
"Sir," You manage to garble out, through the layers of static distorting your vocalizer. "I'm sorry for waking you."
Starscream says nothing. His optics flick to the coolant that drips from your faceplate even as you try to assure him that you're fine, and suddenly, he opens his arms to you in wordless invitation.
"I- sir?"
It's not the first time you would have recharged in his arms. But... this? You hesitate, unsure whether this is too much to ask. Evidently, you've hesitated for too long, because Starscream wraps a servo around your wrist and pulls you gently but insistently to him.
"I'm here," He murmurs gruffly, in low, musical Vosian. And it makes coolant spring to your optics all over again, because ever since Megatron had taken charge, he'd quickly ensured that all his soldiers spoke only standard Cybertronian - a quick and brutal 'show' had made sure of that. You slip into recharge with the gentle lilt of Vosian in your audials, and for once, no more nightmares plague you. You're even more surprised to awaken not to an empty berth, but still pressed up against Starscream's warm chassis.
"Oh, good," Starscream had rasped, vocalizer not quite activated after recharge. "You're awake. There are some things I must see to, so I trust you will stay out of trouble in my absence."
You barely had time to even nod before he was gone. Checking your internal chronometer, you whistle quietly. Was it that late already? Had... had Starscream stayed on purpose, so you wouldn't panic upon seeing an empty berth?
You feel more recharged than you have in many solar cycles. However, your newfound energy and the warmth thrumming through your spark for your commander has only strengthened your determination to do something. Starscream might have kept the nightmares at bay last night, but you knew it wasn't sustainable. The only way you can bring some semblance of peace to yourself and him is if you can become confident in your abilities to repair him without external help.
Which is, admittedly, a lot easier said than done.
You knew you were about to do something really, really stupid.
The Decepticons had traded tales about an Autobot medic named Ratchet, before. The way they spoke of him with begrudging respect was enough for you to believe that Ratchet could work literal miracles, and that was precisely what you needed right now. But how could you possibly approach him?
You've heard enough about the Autobots, observed enough about them to know where they differed from the Decepticons. One major difference was that even when they took prisoners, they were not cruel. What if...?
You're too deep into this to give up. There's too much at stake here - despite the risk, if Ratchet was willing to hear you out, you might one day have a fighting chance to save Starscream's spark from flickering out. Which is how you found yourself trekking along the side of a dusty, abandoned road along some dry, sandy plain, not making any effort to hide yourself as you hoped for an Autobot to come across you.
But at the same time, what if they didn't let you go after taking you prisoner?
Before you can continue to second guess yourself, the roar of a well-oiled motor engine sounds behind you, and you almost laugh at how obvious you're being. A seeker, walking? The Autobot scout, Bumblebee, skids to a stop behind you, and you hear the smooth clicking and whirring of his transformation.
"Looking for trouble?"
Not particularly, You think, turning round to face him, but as Bumblebee falters, you realize you've spoken out loud.
This is the first time you've come face to face with the scout. You're about the same age, and for a moment, you both regard the other with open curiosity, like bots being introduced for the first time by a mutual acquaintance. In another timeline, you wonder if you could have been friends.
Bumblebee squints, looking unsure whether or not to drop his fighting stance. You make no move to engage, and simply stand there, servos dangling limply by your sides. This idea is really, really stupid.
"Defecting?"
You reset your vocalizer. "Not exactly."
"Still enemies, then," Bumblebee says, and he doesn't bother to hide the note of disappointment in his voice. Enemies. He doesn't even know you. You wonder if the divide between you runs too deep, even if only in name for you. Is there nothing more to you beyond faction name?
The bubbling hope of confessing to Bumblebee your real intentions abruptly withers. Why, indeed, would he help you if he knew you wanted to help the SIC of the Decepticons? Still, you hated to say it, but it seemed that Bumblebee had the privilege of naivety for a few more stellar cycles at least, under Optimus' kind guidance. Within the Decepticon ranks, you'd quickly learned that some bots simply didn't deal in kindness. You supposed it was back to the original plan, then.
"I've been out here for a while," You say, pretending to stagger a few steps. You are in the middle of a scorching hot desert plain, after all. Casting your hook, you hope to Primus that Bumblebee buys the act, because even to you, it looks phony as hell.
"I think I'm lost." Bumblebee, who was originally looking suspiciously at you, widens his optics as his little antennae twitch upwards in shock. Line.
You stagger even closer, pressing a servo to your helm. "Bumblebee-" You close your eyes and pray to Primus that the Autobots are actually nice. You really haven't thought any further beyond getting yourself captured. Maybe you wouldn't even get the chance to talk to Ratchet. But you're too far into your little one-man show to back out now. You crash to the ground, and with your optics offlined, hear Bumblebee's yelp of shock, the scuff of dry earth beneath his pedes as he races over to you. And sinker.
"Oh, Primus," Bumblebee mutters. "Why couldn't it just have been a fight? I can do that."
You're honestly hating this war more and more. Bumblebee felt so much like a little brother - you're torn between fighting to keep the laughter from bubbling up, and the need to scold him for letting his guard down so easily. What if it was a genuine trap you'd set for him? He'd rushed to your side with no regard for his own safety. Then again, this was exactly what you'd been banking on - you count your lucky stars that it was indeed Bumblebee you'd run into and not anyone else.
"Ratchet," You hear Bumblebee say into his comm. "There's a 'con here, but not in good shape." Just to really drive it home, you groan weakly from where you're collapsed in a heap on the ground. It must have worked, because Bumblebee's voice pitches upwards in slightly panicked urgency. "Yeah, yeah, I'll bring them through. Thanks, Ratchet."
Huh. You really hadn't expected it to be that easy. The tales you'd heard of the Autobot medic were from when you used to sleep in the barracks with the lower-ranking Decepticons. This varied from his rough bedside manner, his surprising ability to fight ("He had green, glowing optics," One Decepticon said with a shudder), his past as the 'Party Ambulance' (what.) to his relative fame amongst older bots as a highly respected neurosurgeon before the war broke out. Most strikingly, he'd apparently patched up Autobots and Decepticons alike on the battlefield.
"It's some medic code he has," Snorted the Decepticon next to you. "Stupid, if you ask me. Why fix up the bots who are out to get you?"
"Lay off the medic," Another bot admonished sharply. "You might not like it, but quite a few of us owe our sparks to him."
A couple of low, murmured agreements resounded around the room. There was undeniably a begrudging respect for him all around, and a fair number of the bots clearly didn't want to be the ones to take him out, if it ever came to that.
You were thinking about Ratchet even when the lights went out. Even though you'd never met him personally, admiration swirled in your spark for the bot with such a strong moral code that he would never falter in his actions. You'd always dreaded having to choose a side. Being with Starscream meant that you'd 'chosen' the Decepticons, sure - but it was Starscream you were loyal to, not Megatron. You'd resigned yourself to eventually signing your spark away to the cause, because you couldn't think of any other way to survive there. But perhaps, you think, you could be like Ratchet.
And now - as Bumblebee carried you through the swirling groundbridge, your spark thrummed at the possibility of imminently meeting him for real.
As soon as the roar of the portal closed behind you, your audials prick up as a low, gruff voice speaks.
"Are you hurt?"
"Not a dent," Bumblebee says. "Not sure about this one, though."
"Just the one?"
"Yup."
"Huh," The other voice says. "I'll tell Optimus to keep an eye on that area. Never know if the Decepticons are planning something."
You feel Bumblebee shrug, even with you gathered in his arms. One of these days, you really have to tell him off for being too trusting. Enemy or not, he seemed like a decent bot and you didn't want trust to be the thing that destroyed him.
A deep sigh. "Put them in the med bay and go refuel first."
"Sure thing," Bumblebee chirped, and you felt the cold metal of a medical berth against your wings. A few nanokliks passed, and you continue to remain still, pretending to be unconscious. Should you...? Ratchet, however, beat you to it. "Alright," He groused, as soon as you heard the door to his med bay slide shut. "Get up. I know you're not actually unconscious."
Your eyes shoot open. "How-?"
The bot in front of you looks unimpressed. "I'm a medic."
"Right," You mutter sheepishly. Sitting up on the medical berth, you take in the sight of Ratchet for the first time. Red and white, built and stocky. Rounded helm, pointed chevrons. You finally work your way to his faceplate. Glowing blue optics stare exasperatedly back at you.
"Sorry," You mumble, and Ratchet sighs again. He seems to do that a lot. Then again, he seems very tired. You don't blame him.
"If you're done," He grumbles, "I'd like to know why you got yourself kidnapped on purpose." There's an air of mistrust in his optics now, a tenseness to his frame that you don't like. In a way though, you're grateful that he's cutting right to the chase.
"I wanted an audience with you," You begin, haltingly. Ratchet's optics narrow slightly, but he doesn't say anything and just waits for you to continue. "I heard that you fixed up both Autobots and Decepticons before, because you have a code. And I know you're an Autobot - " You glance at the polished insignia on his chassis, "- but I'm kind of... like that, too."
Speech was never your strong suit, and you were glad Starscream often did the talking for you. His silver tongue had surely gotten the both of you out of a few tight spaces before, but you never dared to ask about the details. Fortunately, a sharp in-vent tells you that Ratchet has understood what you were clumsily trying to get across. He crosses his arms over his bulky chassis, optics roving carefully over your faceplate as he assesses the situation.
"So," He asks carefully, "What's your code based on?"
Ah. He'd seemed receptive so far, potentially persuaded to your own one-man cause, but here was the detail that might make him eject you bodily from his med bay.
"Starscream."
You watch as a range of emotions flit across Ratchet's faceplate. Eventually, it settles on confused and mildly horrified. "Starscream? Are you sure?"
"Yes," You say, feeling oddly defensive. Ratchet seems to pick up on this, and he unfolds his arms with an even deeper sigh. "A seeker," He mutters, optics flicking over your form as if really just seeing you for the first time. "How old are you?"
You tell him.
Ratchet pinches the bridge of his helm, between his optics, a bone-deep weariness emanating from his frame. "I'm assuming you're one of Starscream's students, then," He says.
"The last one," You add quietly. The Quintessons launched an attack on the Vosian Air Academy, and I was the only one who survived."
"...Ah."
Another hum, and this time, his optics are appraising, as if something had clicked into place. You, a youngling like Bumblebee, would not be sitting before him with your paint in near pristine condition, had someone not taken you under their wing. Literally and metaphorically.
"So what is it you want from me?"
"Can you teach me some first aid?" You blurt. Ratchet's brows furrow.
"I could," He says, confusion evident in his voice. "But what for? Don't the the Decepticons have a medic?"
"Well, yes," You hedge, "But, you know. Starscream."
That part he understands - it was no secret that the Decepticons had a brutal system of hierarchy that relied on shows of power. It made sense that Starscream wouldn't want to be seen in a vulnerable state. But there's still something he's missing.
"As far as I know," Ratchet presses carefully, "Starscream has not sustained any major injuries at the hands of the Autobots in recent stellar cycles."
You probably shouldn't be revealing so much information about the inner workings of the Decepticons, but as your hate for Megatron simmers into exhaustion, you slump on Ratchet's medical berth and decide to tell him anyway.
"Megatron... punishes him. A lot."
Ratchet seems slightly taken aback by that. Anyone with functioning optics could tell that the Decepticons were kept in line by fear, and it was no secret that violence ran rampant within the ranks - but to hear it so plainly that even their SIC was no exception? And to have you, trembling before him, desperate to help him, clearly knowing that rudimentary first aid was not enough for whatever injuries Megatron had inflicted - it must be worse than Ratchet had ever thought.
He checks his internal chronometer - you've been here for about a joor. Soon, someone is going to come looking for you, and neither faction is looking particularly appealing right now.
"We don't have much time. Hurry up and get over here."
Your helm shoots up as Ratchet pivots crisply away from you, suddenly all business. You leap off the medical berth, following him to a large table where he thunks down a heavy med kit. This Ratchet, intense, precise, laying a series of tools in front of you with deft servos, is undoubtedly the war medic that had earned every inch of respect he got. Now you understand why the Deceptions were so begrudgingly impressed by him.
Ratchet hesitates for a nanoklik before pulling out some even more complicated looking tools. Is this really happening? At your wide, awestruck optics, Ratchet huffs, a light flush of energon on his faceplate at your bursting admiration. "Alright already. Stop staring at me and pay attention."
Two joors pass before you hear the sounds of a commotion outside. Ratchet's audials flick agitatedly before he glances at you. "You'd better go," He murmurs, low and urgent.
Go? Just like that? Ratchet must have seen you freeze up in disbelief, because he snarls and springs into action for both of you, ushering you out of medbay and towards the groundbridge.
"I'm sure you know how to get back," He says, quick and curt, typing in a set of coordinates. The groundbridge shimmers to life. "Go," He orders, in a voice that brooks no argument. I'll handle this."
You give him one last, lingering glance before you step through the glowing green portal. Ratchet's staring at you too, something hovering unspoken in his optics. "Kid," He finally calls, as the sound of the commotion approaches. "No matter where this war takes you, be true to yourself."
You give him a jerky nod, overwhelmed but endlessly grateful.
With that, the groundbridge warps out of existence behind you, leaving behind a cacophony of Autobot shouts and abruptly plunging you back into the silent, sandy plain where you first met Bumblebee.
For a nanoklik, you feel so very alone.
But leaving Starscream was out of the question. Amidst all the uncertainty in the war, this is the one thing you're sure of. You leap into the air, transforming into your alt mode. If you were lucky, Starscream would still be on duty and you could sneak back before anyone had realized you were gone. You spiral through the air, picking up speed as night begins to fall. The flames of your thrusters illuminate the purple dusk as you add another burst of speed, your form now a screaming blur in the sky.
But before you can reach your destination, your destination reaches you first. Your only warning is a streak that blitzes into your field of vision before something huge and heavy tackles you out of the sky.
The impact completely knocks your systems offline for a nanoklik. Unable to even scream, you struggle to force your systems to reboot, gain back control of your frame as you hurtle towards the ground - but strangely enough, you quickly realize that you're not freefalling wildly through the air. Battling against the screaming winds at your back, you force your optics open to see none other than a furious Starscream, his servos gripping your arms with deathly force as he drives you downwards.
"Where the Pit were you?" He hisses, over the shrill whistling of air in your audials. "I've just spent the last few joors hunting every corner of this slagging dirtball for your sorry aft!"
As you plummet downwards, you struggle to make sense of his words. He was looking for you?
"What if Megatron got to you first?" He snarls, denta bared. "I told you to stay put! Do you treat my words like slag?"
You didn't think he'd catch you sneaking out, but you never imagined he'd be this angry. Both of you rocket through the clouds, the green environment of Earth swirling into your field of vision. Was this it? Had Starscream finally decided you were more trouble than you were worth? You wouldn't blame him. Shuttering your optics, you brace yourself for impact. His servos, where he's touching your frame, are warm. That's how you'd remember him, before you go out. Stolen moments of warmth with him. After all he'd done for you.
But over the screaming wind in your audials, your don't hear so much as feel his engines screech as he pulls up at the last minute. The warmth of his servos abruptly leave you, and your optics fly open as you are dropped a few meters above a patch of open grass and promptly eat ground. As you push yourself up with a groan, not so much sore but still ablaze with adrenaline, the realization suddenly hits. What Starscream did... Was not unlike how carriers and sires dealt with unruly seeker sparklings when they refused to leave the air. You shake your helm in disbelief, spitting out another mouthful of earth soil. Starscream... had quite literally grounded you. Huh.
You roll over to the sight of him seething above you, his ruby optics alight with rage, intake twisted in a snarl.
"Imagine," He hisses, looming over you, "When I learned you were being held captive by the Autobots - have you no sense of self-preservation in that scrap-filled processor of yours? Have I taught you absolutely nothing?"
His wings shudder with barely concealed anger as he begins to pace. "And of all the bots, it had to be that pit-slagged femme who blocked my way!"
Arcee? You're not too familiar with the Autobots, but you remember Starscream had literally shrieked himself into stasis after a particular battle with the Autobots over an energon mine, where a certain pink femme had foiled his plans at the very last nanoklik.
Wait. Arcee had blocked his way? You stare blankly at him as it sinks in that the commotion you heard earlier... was in fact Starscream singlehandedly blasting his way through the Autobot base to save you.
"Oh," You say.
"Oh?" Starscream screeches, wings twitching furiously. "Oh? That's all you have to say for yourself?"
You still can't bring yourself to speak as you gaze up at him. And slowly, a smile splits your faceplate. You can't help it. You smile big and bright up at your commander. "What?" He demands shrilly. "What is it?" He does falter, rage dropping momentarily from his faceplate and muting into confusion when you start to laugh. Relief, adrenaline, admiration, all at once.
"It was worth it." You gasp, through your fit on the ground. All this was worth it for Starscream, who'd against all better judgement risked his own helm to come looking for you, because he was worried. You'd carefully filed away every detail of Ratchet's instruction this afternoon. With the knowledge he'd bestowed upon you and extra bandages in your subspace, the gamble had paid off, because the chances of you preserving Starscream's spark had skyrocketed if the worst came to pass.
Starscream just stares at you, a hysterically giggling heap on the ground. "It was worth it!" You shriek, because Starscream is the one who found you and for now, you are safe.
You finally come back to yourself after a few cycles of wheezing almost soundlessly in your relief. You're sure there's coolant smeared over your faceplates and you look like a mess, but you don't give a frag - not when your stupid plan actually came to something. "Sir," You sigh to Starscream, who's still frozen above you, optics tracking your faceplate as you finally simmer down. "I'm going to have the best recharge of anybody today."
Unexpectedly, this douses Starscream's anger. He studies you carefully for a nanoklik. You take this rare moment to shamelessly drink in his handsome features - the sharp, defined ridges of his cheeks, the brightness of his optics, and the disapprovingly flattened line of his intake (okay, but still). Did he think that the nightmares, the war had finally broken your processor? It had happened to a few of the Decepticons. That would explain the flicker of worry in his optics - but he seems to find what he's looking for in your faceplate, so he simply sighs, all of a sudden looking more tired than you've seen him. He extends a servo to you.
"Get up."
You gingerly put your servo in his much larger one, feel his fingers close around yours as he pulls you up with much more gentleness than you're sure you deserve.
"I won't ask," Starscream begins. His optics flash. "But I will find out sooner or later."
You nod, trying for serious, but you must still have vestiges of a smile on your faceplate. Starscream stares at you and plants his hands on his hips.
"And don't think this will go unpunished. You think sneaking out is funny? Not when I'm through with you. You'll have done so many circuits of the 16-point roll that your wings will have dropped off by then. Sneaking off? Primus help you if it happens again. You think I'm coming to drag your sorry aft back home? Hah!"
I mean. He would come for you, but you wisely keep this to yourself as he gesticulates wildly to prove his point, even if both of you know it's more for show than anything.
Finally, he finishes his tirade with a huff. "It's dark," He says shortly, and glances at you. In the dark, his optics cast a soft glow on your faceplate.
"Eugh. Primus, wipe that stuff off your faceplate or it'll stain." Two large servos come down either side of your helm, and you can't help but flinch as Starscream swipes his thumbs over your cheeks to clean the coolant off. Still admonishing you, but his voice is forgiving and wraps around you like a warm blanket. "Stop squirming."
Finally, your faceplate relatively un-smudged, Starscream breaks apart from you. You try to soak in this moment as long as possible, wishing it could always be like this. Just the two of you, under a sky full of stars. This planet's view of the solar system could really be beautiful. You glance back to find Starscream looking at you, also looking reluctant to leave. However, he has to play the bad guy. He always does.
"Come on," He says, but it's gentle. "Let's go."
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#transformers#maccadam#starscream x reader#transformers x reader#starscream#tf starscream#tf ratchet
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Wake Up!
Pairing: Husband!Chuuya x Wife!Reader
Genre: Angst
Content warning: Fighting/murder, reader death, guns, sad Chuuya
Synopsis: Chuuya has finally finished his mission, and he eagerly races home to the warmth of his wife. But he is in for a surprise...and not the good kind.
Chuuya knew something was wrong the moment he stepped through the front doorway of the house. The smile that had adorned his face a moment prior has now vanished, instead leaving a guarded expression as his eyebrows furrowed. He smoothly reached for his knife, keeping it at the ready as he entered the hallway. It was eerily silent, like the type of stillness that occurs before a planned attack.
He was in deep thought, why was his instincts screaming at him to stay on guard? There was no way his wife, (Y/N), was asleep because he had seen the lights on when he had parked his pink motorcycle in the garage. Something wasn’t adding up, and Chuuya didn’t want to think too deeply about it. He feared for the worst, but refused to acknowledge that fear, instead squashing down the nagging voice that spewed alarming nonsense deep in his mind. He didn’t want to think about that nauseating feeling in his stomach, instead opting to wonder why his wife was playing pranks on him. That had to be it, right? Thankfully, Chuuya had finished his train of thought when the first bullet zoomed towards him, giving him enough time to dodge. His eyes stayed fixed on the hole it had caused on the wall behind him. Not reacting. Not moving. His mind was racing; why were there intruders in the house?
He turned around slowly, now a slight reddish glow outlining his body, face void of any emotions, but a dangerous wrath clashing in his eyes. With a loud scream, Chuuya launched himself onto his enemies, fists pummelling them to the ground, ripping them apart with his ability. It came like second nature, the easy murdering, as he attempted to push through them all to get a glimpse of his beloved. And the red glow around him only grew brighter the longer he fought, and soon, he had given up trying to save the precious items in the room. By the time he was done, Chuuya surveyed the destruction around him forlornly, imagining the scowl that would surely be present on his (Y/N)’s face when she sees the mess and proceeds to adorably berate him for his actions.
Chuuya quickly dashed up the stairs, kicking the door of their shared room open, and saw her lying on the middle of their bed. Her eyes were closed, and he slowly walked towards her with a fearful smile on his face. Silly (Y/N), how could you not wake up at the commotion that had occurred downstairs? His mind thought, yet his mouth refused to speak it out loud. Instead, silent tears were pouring down his face, as he shakily stepped closer, his body acknowledging what his mind has not.
His wife was asleep, yes. But this type of sleep was permanent.
The sound that left Chuuya’s mouth was inhuman, guttural screams that wracked through his body as he fell to his knees besides her. Crimson red covered her like paint on canvas, creating a horrifying image as her face was twisted in a picture of pain. Cradling her head in his hand, he placed a gentle kiss on her cold skin, begging her desperately in a broke voice to come back to him. His wife, his sweet wife, had died a gruesome death, filled with agony till the very last breath.
And the worst bit? He wasn’t even there to comfort her during her last moments.
A/N: Thanks for reading! I wanted to expand my writing style – I’ve always written more action/plot heavy things rather than focus on feelings, so I wanted to try some angst since there’s lots of emotions. But I think the scenario I chose wasn’t too ideal for angst so…I guess this isn’t the best…but oh well, it was my first try after all ☺️
#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bungo stray dogs#chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#bungou stray dogs chuuya#chuuya x reader#chuuya x you#chuuya x y/n#nakahara chūya#nakaharachuuya#bsd nakahara#chuya nakahara x reader
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Is Terri more into pantsuits or trousers, or dresses? Dani I can see wearing adorable dresses and cute little hot shorts that drive Terri insane. Maybe something both pretty and tomboyish? Hehe ♥️ Fem!John would never go near any type of feminine clothing whatsoever. She’d rather die. Jeans and plaid shirts for life!!! Also—a wallet!
So I actually have a few things saved. Sorry, I don't remember where I saved them from or when.
I typically headcanon Terri as more feminine than Dani in a very ... Measured way.
Does anyone else remember when "hard femme" was an aesthetic? That's her.
She dresses feminine yet also strong. And everything she wears has a purpose, if she's going out that is. So she likes to mix things up. Maybe more androgynous cuts with more feminine fabrics,and vice versa. Her body is a weapon, and not just with karate. She knows that people will be judging her based on her appearance. She knows it's bullshit, but she also knows that it's easier to play the game and win than to change it.
She knows she's attractive. She knows that men look at her. She likes to show off her body, but also remind them they can't ever have it.
She's rarely full glam, usually more business chic. But she still has her hair and make up on point at all times.
I find a lot of what Katie McGrath wears as Lena Luthor to fit well.
When she's alone with Dani, or maybe Margaret, she's more likely to wear comfortable, sensible clothes. Of course, even those are high quality. She's the type of person who spends a stupid amount of money on a basic t-shirt because it's from a certain brand.
Dani is considered more tomboyish. But she's not against femininity, she just never got used to dressing up or anything like that. She likes to be comfortable. But when the time comes, she also wants to feel cute.
She's unlikely to go full glam. She likes things that are both pretty and soft like her. That's why she likes shorts. They're convenient and comfortable, more practical than skirts, but she knows they show off her legs.
When she wears dresses they're usually fun, flirty and casual sun dresses, or she's draped in silk that hangs off her frame delicately. She doesn't really have an eye for patterns or fabrics, she just likes whatever feels best against her skin.
She definitely had some mismatched fashion disasters when she was still shopping second hand.
(plaid and camo rings a bell)
Terri likes to put her in so pleasant patterns and striking colors, because she wants Dani's beauty to be the main attraction.
Left to her own devices she'd just wear jeans and t shirts most days. But she's natured a bit since then.
When she wears heels they're low kitten heels, unless she's purposefully wearing them for sex appeal. And that's only ever for Terri.
Joan would be totally butch. She would be the kind of lesbian who hangs a carabiner off her belt loops.
She can count the number of times she's worn proper dresses on one hand. She likes her trusty work boots. She likes the weight of them. The dependability. She likes flannel, not just the plaid pattern, but the actual flannel fabric. She likes canvas and leather.
She more or less just dresses nearly the same as in canon.
#rule 63 silverusso#rule 63 lakreese#rule 63 krilverusso#a nonny mouse#if i had more images saved i would share them#ive never gotten into the habit of browing for clothes#i like them but im not vwry good at shopping lol#*very#it would be fun to make more mood boards one day
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Baby boy brother birthday photos from last year that I just realized I never uploaded!
#cats#also hopefully it's not weird to still post photos of George (the brown cat) even after his death a little while ago. I just have so many#beautiful old pictures of him that I still love but just never had the time to sort through or upload (my cat photos folder on my#computer had like 450 pictures in it or something lol... SO many). I feel like it's kind of just honoring or appreciating him#and not actually strange or anything. like what am I supposed to do. delete them?? I want to share them still because he is beautiful and#perfect ! idk. aNYWAY. Also this is their 2022 birthday when they turned 14 years old. (even though I think when I posted#their 2021 bday I might have said they were 14 then too. I was off by a year lol). 2023 when they turned 15 I unfortunately#was feeling kind of sick at the time and didn't really have the energy to do the decorations like I usually do. So they just got a few#treats and stuff. But I didn't know that would be george's last birthday lol. :/#They also do not really know or care though. they're cats who cannot process it or know the concept of birthdays so. eh#I still have no idea how these got lost on the computer though. Like I had them fully edited ready to post but just sitting in a folder??#Since MARCH 2022 lol... ??? the folder was in another folder of pictures so maybe that's how I overlooked it#But it's my 'once every 4 months computer organizing and clean out time' so I was going tghrough looking for pictures#I could drafts posts out of or sort or etc.#They got lots more treats for this birthday because one of my friends actually game me a few gifts for them#elderly boys.!!!!#I used to write in the little caption/image description sections to talk about them all individually but at some point tumblr broke that#feature and for so long they never saved or weren't visible so I stopped doing them and just ramble a bunch in the tags instead#but I kind of miss them. Thinking about old posts of the cats where I commented on each photo individually too lol.. the good ole days
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#i was like lets make a cute little thing really quick and then i tunnel visioned for.... 20 mins?#don't open the tags unless you're prepared for a wall of text#my art#another one of those images which uncomfortably straddle the line between 'my scribbles' and 'my actual work that i put real effort into'#anyway this is me after i was like let's make a proof of concept for a productivity app it'll be fun and fast#and in order to make a full proof of concept i went back to the initial thoughts i had about the app (which i wrote down of course)#so i could. y'know. get the full concept down. and then i read like thousands of words of completely disorganized spitballing. head spinnin#but also did you know that me from what. like 3 years ago? shares remarkably similar ideals as me today. who would have thought really.#i had forgotten about half of the stuff that i originally wanted in the app and now my app idea is slightly bigger#(my already big mind palace app is already. big)#and maybe you'd be like 'wow okay that just means you grew up and developed so you don't need them anymore!' false sense of security it's#actually because i am no longer a student and also have no job so my daily life is different but my work ethic (lack thereof??)#is still the. same. so if i were ever to work in a society again i would need. them. most likely#and the other half of the stuff that i originally wanted are things that i unwittingly wrote into my recent drafts so yeah i got kinda#blindsided by myself back there. 'oh shit YOU were the one who came up with this first. wtf i thought i was being original and innovative'#slight exaggeration bc what im making is like 98% clone and 2% not clone (but maybe still 99% clone bc there might be another app out there#that i just haven't heard of but is like exactly the same as what i am thinking in my head)a nyways#okay yeah uhhhhhhh so i'll be back at some point with more fun words good night fellows#also did you know that ms paint has layers now (not that new news) and also doesn't let you save in layers that's crazy shit
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After the hospital bombing, I finally heard back from my grandmother and confirmed that several of my relatives were murdered by Israeli bombing. Seven of them, to be precise. Three are still going, including her. We've been talking constantly ever since.
Asked if it was possible to head south, and was told they did but were also bombed there. So they decided to go back home, in Zeitoun. Their home was bombed and they were pulled out of the rumble, then driven by ambulances to the al-Ahli Arab Hospital. There were people in every corner. Gazans sheltering, sleeping on the floor. Gazans dying on the floor, waiting for beds.
Four were declared dead on arrival, three were in need of surgery and other three were just bandaged. Then, a bomb was dropped in the parking lot that made parts of the ceiling collapse, like Dr. Ghassan Abu Sittah reported in that horrific conference/interview. Those in need of surgery died.
By the way, just in case you didn't know: the Church of Saint Porphyrius, the third oldest in history, bombed by Israel a few days back, was located near the hospital.
When looking for new shelter, they saw schools with signs hanging outside, "We can't take any more families." They met families, sympathetic but already sheltering too many people. They're now staying in an apartment building they found empty. Sleeping in the corner of the living room. If the family comes back, they'll apologize and leave.
Told me she was saving her phone battery for when the bombing stopped, and she had to ask for help to rebuilt the neighborhood. But she doesn't think it's gonna stop anymore. The ones still with her are mute most of the time, like they're saving energy, but she feels lonely and wanted to talk. There's no internet and to connect to WhatsApp, people are buying "a card from the supermarket, there's a password and username." Not sure what she meant. Still, the internet is inconsistent and won't load neither videos or images nor pages, so she doesn't know what's happening on the outside world.
Told her there were a lot of people protesting to stop the genocide, she replied, "The bombings are getting worse by the day." The bombing yesterday was the worst she ever witnessed. The entire neighborhood is infested with the smell of death, of decomposing bodies. Bodies are piling up in the streets and she's not sure if it's because they ran out of places to store them, but most of them are in bags. The smoke of the bombings hide the blue sky—she hasn't seen the clouds for a while.
Asked if I could share their pictures, names and dreams with people and was told, of which I partly agree, "they're not entertainment." If anyone genuinely cared, they would be alive—I'd argue there are people who do care, but I'm not gonna lecture her pain. And they don't deserve to be used to fulfill someone's sick fantasy. Told me to remember what some Israelis do with pictures of dead Palestinians. And I do.
For those of you who are not familiar, many times before settlers got together to celebrate the murder of Palestinians. For one, in 2015, Israeli settlers set a house in Duma, West Bank on fire. An 18-month old baby, Ali Dawbsheh, was burnt alive. Both parents later died of wounds and only a 5-year-old, Ahmad, survived, although severely injured.
Two celebrations of their murder are widely known, one at a wedding and others outside the court in which two were indicted for the terrorist attack. In the wedding, guests stabbed a photo of the toddler, Ali, while others waved guns, knives and Molotov cocktails. Israel's Minister of National Security, Itamar Ben-Gvir, was present.
That's what happens in an apartheid. Palestinians are so abused by authorities that their "innocent civilians" come to accept the brutality as necessary or are desensitized by our suffering. After all, it's been 75 years—get used to it!
So I won't risk the image of my loved ones, in fear they are used in these kinds of depravity. I will say, though, the world lost a young footballer. Lost a female writer and an aspiring ballerina. Lost a kind father, who was also a great cook, and a loving mother that enjoyed sewing and other types of handicraft art. Lost a math teacher and a child that wanted to become one.
People think Israel is testing new weapons on them. There's civilians arriving at the hospital with severe burns, which they thought was from white phosphorus, but apparently the pattern is different from the one caused by white phosphorus. It's widely believed Israel tests weapons in Palestinians.
Jeff Halper, author of War Against the People, a book on Israel's arms and surveillance technology industries, said: "Israel has kept the occupation because it's a laboratory for weapons."
They've ran out of drinkable water and the "aid" Biden sent was only for the South of Gaza and no fuel, for hospitals, was allowed in. Many shelves in the supermarket are empty. She said many are convinced that if they don't die from the bombing, they'll die from starvation or dehydration, or whatever disease will develop from the dirty water they're drinking.
Told me all people do now is pray, cry and die. Told me she hopes West Bank is spared. Told her Israel bombed a mosque in West Bank and dozens of Palestinians in West Bank are being murdered by settlers, so she bided me goodbye.
#palestine#free palestine#gaza#free gaza#may allah protect them#may almighty allah see our pain#hopefully she'll message me tomorrow
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Do NOT Support Hard Drive On Patreon
You might see friends today suggesting you support Hard Drive on Patreon today. You know, the funny video games version of The Onion? As a journalist, I will firmly tell you DO NOT GIVE THEM A DIME.
The CEO has pushed out all former staff that have built the site up to its current greatness and has been pushing the use of AI. The staff begged to have a Patreon before basically all being pushed out, but the idea was refused until now, when it will only line the pockets of a single person instead of hard working writers.
I know they might have provided laughs before, but Hard Drive is a shell of what it was once. Let it die and support the people who actually made those moments of joy possible. Don't believe me? Check out what former employees are saying below:
Kevin Podas: Okay you know what, I would feel bad saying nothing about this, so here goes:🚨SAVE YOUR MONEY🚨
We passionately advocated for a Patreon at Hard Drive & were aggressively shot down. The talent & people who built the site were pushed out. To see this now is beyond upsetting. For the past few years or so I put a lot of myself into this website. I pitched a ton of jokes, got over 120 articles published, & met a lot of great people. I'm sure if you've been following me for some time you could easily see this.
However, there is a lot of misinformation. I was eventually promoted to Managing Editor of the site & was ecstatic. Grateful for the opportunity. Felt like all of my hard work in the comedy mines was finally paying off. But things took a turn for the worst, & each day there were new surprises that affected our livelihoods. These were all very avoidable surprises, mind you.
A patreon was going to be our hail mary, but alas, for some reason, the power that be did not want it. Causing us to leave a dream job behind. "At least we did all we could," we consoled ourselves afterwards. I put a lot of myself into this project. I pitched all sorts of ideas that could have helped-- we all did. Merch collaborations, Patreon-integrated YouTube content, so much more. And most of them were shot down out of sheer stubbornness and nothing more. To see lie after lie spread, and multiple big publications and YouTubers that I am a fan of promote this Patreon under these pretenses is incredibly upsetting. There are so many receipts.
Please share this and consider pulling out if you've already put money into this. On Hard Drive using AI, also from Kevin Podas: I can't personally confirm that part aside from some of the recent header images for articles on both Hard Drive and Hard Times are being made with AI. As far as writing, it's been mentioned in the past, but I personally do not know. Maybe others do, maybe not. MORE From Kevin Podas suggesting the owner denying a Patreon being set up earlier cost an artist a job that was replaced by AI: We had a social media person who was awesome! He made the images until this AI implementation. He had to leave because ad revenue was low and a Patreon was aggressively refused.
Luca Fisher: at the risk of burning some bridges, i have to back up kevin here. i've only been part-time, in-and-out of hard drive since i got in last year, but i can corroborate that management doubled and tripled down about not hosting a patreon/crowdfunding and that many other suggestions and ideas, including mine (and ones much smarter than mine!), were shot down in really long, apocalyptic threads of everyone left on deck desperately trying to come up with ways to keep the lights on. managerially it has been messy and sad
i've written for multiple publications that have long since died, ones that were in the process of dying, and ones that, in this case, are soon to be put in the ground. it is sad and sucks every time. i don't know what could have been done differently, but i do know that a lot of great writers and content creators were left shorthanded and unhappy by the way things have gone. and it is sort of puzzling to see the sudden championing of patreon after we were all told plenty of times that it couldn't work and we should move on also, just to add my own personal two cents here, i was really disappointed by the shuttering of many different article sections on the site over the past 6-8 months. i understand cutting corners in a deficit, and i know it had to be done. that said…
all in all, i'm really sad to see this all happen. i don't fault anyone, if only because i don't really know enough about how this all can happen to make sense of it. games journalism is in a sad, sorry state, and will likely no longer be a thing in the next decade
VideoSealMan: I'm gonna say this because I think I deserve to. For months, MONTHS on end I was bugging Hard Drive management about a Patreon. Often I got ignored for a week+, but when I actually got a response I was encouraged to - of all things, write up a Google Doc pitching the concept I did it regardless. I wasn't the only one trying to sway management on a Patreon, but so fiercely was I fighting for it that last night, I was accused of making this comment directly by the CEO! With no evidence whatsoever! After I'd been gone for over a month.
I vouched so hard for Patreon because I wanted all the writers and creatives working with Hard Drive including myself to get paid better. When I actually got a response, the idea was often shut down. Eventually due to the state of my company, my pay was cut for a second time I confronted management alongside a couple other important figureheads at the org and told them that if we couldn't do a Patreon - I could no longer financially justify staying there. The answer was still no, so I left. Baffled at the decision, but whatever.
It is unendingly frustrating to know that myself and many other people who put their soul into Hard Drive LEFT because of management's absolute refusal to compromise on a Patreon, to then see them launch one anyway a month later and get over 1000 people pledging money. I'm seeing a lot of things float around about greed and people being fired. No one was fired. Everyone who left, left because they were sick of management's decision-making. And honestly, management is a lot of things but I would not call them greedy. (From my experience.) They did genuinely make an effort to pay people as much as possible. I found the pay very fair for a while. I am not disputing that I was paid what I was owed - yet management frequently feels the need to remind critics of that. Lmao, yes. I was paid what I was owed. No one is disputing payment. You did the bare minimum a business owner should do and paid everyone their due, very well done. I make no allegations of greed, cheating or foul play. I make allegations of poor management and incompetence that has fucked over other people.
Basically the only people left at Hard Drive have been there for about 2 months. They will reap the rewards of this successful Patreon I and so many others passionately fought for for so long. We will not see a dime.
I do not know the new people at Hard Drive, But I feel bad for them. They were haphazardly thrust into Hard Drive's workplace with little to no explanation on how anything works, or given any context on the state of the place. Even now managements feeds them half-truths and misinformation about other people's grievances. I am broke and have been for a while. I had to move out of my flat in Reading and back with my family because of how little money I was making. This has basically doomed my flatmate to moving back in with abusive parents, which is something I feel guilty about every day. If we had gone with the Patreon I worked myself hoarse over back then, this could have been avoided. Some of my other good pals could also not have been fucked over.
It was a bad judgment call, but it's not a crime. It's just management getting it wrong.
So should you give to the Hard Drive Patreon? I don't know! I don't think any of the new people working there to patch up the holes left by the recent mass exodus have any bad intentions. Maybe they deserve it! But it is not the same site you knew a year ago, or even a month ago. Myself and many people who were there far longer than me and did far more for it than I did are all gone now because we could not deal with management's terrible decision-making and dogass communication any longer. That's what you should know, imo
I had an agreement in place with management that I would receive the next 8 months of revenue from the Hard Drive YT channel from my leaving in November. This was a deal I appreciated, and thought was very fair on management's behalf. So far, the deal has been honoured for 2 months. However as of last night I was removed from the Hard Drive Slack without warning, and as an editor for the YouTube channel. This means I no longer have any way of verifying how much I am owed, I just have to take their word for it. I'm sure management will make their own statements full of half-truths and weird language on the many cases being brought against them - I'd take everything they say with a pinch of salt if some of the screenshots I've seen of them talking about me are any indication lol
To management; I do not want to talk to you. I want you to DM me a screenshot of how much I'm owed every month and then send me the money per our agreement until June, then we can go our separate ways. Do that and admit to your mistakes, and maybe you can recover your reputation! That's it from me, lol. If they pull out of the deal and fuck me over I'll have more to say, but most of what I know is other people's stories of incompetence and poor decision-making, lol. I genuinely get no pleasure out of doing this; I do not think management is evil - I just think they're really bad at what they do and it's cost other, more talented people, lol. You should believe the writers imo
One last thing I wanna say btw, management did often stress that no one should try to make Hard Drive a full time thing. They were transparent about that, and that is fair. I was working on it because at a few points, I was lead to believe we actually were doing a Patreon. Many other ppl have similar stories of being strung along by management changing their minds and stop-starting shit every 2 weeks. We all made the fatal mistake of overestimating our manager - who would tell you one thing one day and something totally opposite the next week lol
Hunter R. Thompson:
I'm not your dad, but speaking as a Hard Drive writer, I don't know that funding Hard Drive on Patreon is worth it
The driving talent on the back end—behind the kickass site I joined in 2019—have peaced out over the years as the site's been (in our view) increasingly mismanaged. Mismanagement like, not setting up crowdfunding before the ship sank and all its best crew failed; or publishing a screenshot of Andy Ngo pedojacketing a trans writer, complete with her deadname; or a disgruntled ex-writer getting falsely accused of shit-talk, by actual staff. I'm grateful for the writing I've gotten to produce for HD (and will forever be kicking myself for not writing even more, in the four years I've had to do it!! i'm a dumbass!!!) but it is very much no longer the site I signed up for.
I don't want to resign as a contributor altogether, because I'm open to the idea of the site recovering and bad practices being retired as finances level out-- it would just be dishonest for potential backers to not be Aware Of The Circumstances, I think.
Jeremy Kaplowitz: i truly don't want to start shit, but feel compelled to say: i want to see Hard Drive succeed w/o resorting to throwing former writers & editors, myself included, under the bus. surely there's a way to save the site without building it over the corpses of those who left. my $0.02 i don't blame anyone who wants to sign up for the HD patreon and i support the website, but that includes those who worked on it for years, have complaints, and don't deserve to be treated like bitter assholes like this kind of stuff is just objectively true, meanwhile there's these new writers who joined the site after i left (meaning, in the last ~3 months) claiming people are liars. decide for yourself if you care, but this is what happened! [Quotes this Tweet]
Seth Finkelstein: Writing for Hard Drive has been a privilege the past few years, and it makes me so angry to see people I looked up to get jerked around behind the scenes. The amount of grenades the editors jumped on our behalf is immense, and I don't think the way they're being treated is right.
Other Bits On AI: We do know for sure however that AI art has been used by the site. Its fucking owner confirms it here:https://twitter.com/MattSaincome/status/1743040541603123622. Seems the owner pushed AI written articles as well! TayFabe: My vaguetweet is making the rounds & these made me apoplectic. - owner regularly lobbied using ai. Once he tested it & said ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. - ai images were used on the site & socials w/o consulting the team or disclosing it publicly I found the ai bit relevant to include bc 1) it illuminates a stark change in HD's current direction & leadership, 2) ai images have previously been used on the site and (since deleted) ig posts, 3) ai content fucking sucks, and repeatedly pushing to use it is a telling quality The "handful of writers who chose to leave" includes 2 editors-in-chief (both cofounders who wrote a combined total of >1,000 articles & defined the voice of HD), & at least 3 other editors. These guys put in WORK since 2017, so cool to be corrected by ppl who joined in Nov 2023 [Link to mentioned vague tweet from post.] More from TayFabe: owner continuously lobbied for using ai in every possible way. No one else wanted to do it, but he kept on, saying ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. Also, ai images were used on the site & socials without public disclosure or consulting the team.
The owner has responded now multiple times in a private discord... Thank you for people sharing screenshots! First Screenshot:
Kevin's Response: He banned me from the server for speaking out, so no, I didn't see it. And he gave no indication of a timeline, it was just "we'll do one when *I* say so" and gave every inclination he was totally against it. It bred an environment that pushed our hands to have to leave. Screenshot Round Two:
Kevin's Response: "Starting one in 3 months" is an absolute lie. He denied it, I have screenshots and others who can confirm. No timeline was given. Just "this is what it is now" and like, I couldn't live off of that. I wanted to do more but he was allergic to good ideas from others around him.
Matt, owner of Hard Drive, responds publicly on Twitter.
Matt: Kevin, the patreon launch was delayed because I didn't think it would work. Everyone is happy that it did work. Everyone who left the site because we didn't have money to pay for creative content which didn't revenue is welcome to return home. But unclear why the hostility.
Hard Drive paid out literally every dollar it had, then a bunch more, to creative people who worked on the site. When we ran out of money, we couldn't pay anymore. We did our best.
Kevin: Right, and my point of this thread was that it was completely and totally avoidable. This is reasonable to be upset about. How could I have been any more clear?
Matt: If we knew with 100% certainly that the community would have supported us via patreon, we would have done that. We didn't know. We had tried 4 years ago and got no support. We were wrong this time. We did our best to figure it out. We paid all the money we could.
Kevin: So you knew with 100% certainty this time? Or you took a leap of faith?
Matt: It was a last gasp panic effort after ad rates got cut in half on january 1st due to seasonal spending changes. We didn't know it would work. We were embarrassed to ask for support. We wanted to figure it out.
Kevin: Every site has a Patreon. Every YouTuber, comedy group, etc. But you insisted that nobody cared about Hard Drive. Which is wildly untrue. I know you see that now, but again, I think you can see why I and many others are pretty upset. A last ditch panic effort was long overdue. A couple more things from Matt:
It was about the size of the hole we needed plugged budget wise, the time I had left of personal resources, and the past data I had about us trying a patreon (which turned out to be a bad indicator). I didn't think the Patreon would help us fast enough. I made a bad estimation
aka "if we make $1000 more dollars a month via patreon, which would be 10x what we got last time, we will not solve any of our problems. If instead we try to plow down path B, we might make it out in time." That was the thinking. I chose the wrong path, but didn't mean to Kevin also retweeted this comment from the user Matt was responding to: So you're saying that you're bad at running the business, didn't listen to any of your employees until after they were forced to leave their jobs, and now you're going to get more of the money from the Patreon that was their idea in the first place? Matt's Response: Respectfully, I made a mistake delaying the patreon decision. But keeping a comedy site alive for 9 years is not easy, there are lots of potential ideas, and think overall we've done a good and honorable job. Will leave this thread in peace now to allow people their space.
Sorry for linking to Elon's hellsite (derogatory), but sources need links so...
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"The studios thought they could handle a strike. They might end up sparking a revolution"
by Mary McNamara
"If you want to start a revolution, tell your workers you’d rather see them lose their homes than offer them fair wages. Then lecture them about how their “unrealistic” demands are “disruptive” to the industry, not to mention disturbing your revels at Versailles, er, Sun Valley.
Honestly, watching the studios turn one strike into two makes you wonder whether any of their executives have ever seen a movie or watched a television show. Scenes of rich overlords sipping Champagne and acting irritated while the crowd howls for bread rarely end well for the Champagne sippers.
This spring, it sometimes seemed like the Hollywood studios represented by the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers were actively itching for a writers’ strike. Speculations about why, exactly, ran the gamut: Perhaps it would save a little money in the short run and show the Writers Guild of America (perceived as cocky after its recent ability to force agents out of the packaging business) who’s boss.
More obviously, it might secure the least costly compromise on issues like residuals payments and transparency about viewership.
But the 20,000 members of the WGA are not the only people who, having had their lives and livelihoods upended by the streaming model, want fair pay and assurances about the use of artificial intelligence, among other sticking points. The 160,000 members of the Screen Actors Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists share many of the writers’ concerns. And recent unforced errors by studio executives, named and anonymous, have suddenly transformed a fight the studios were spoiling for into a public relations war they cannot win.
Even as SAG-AFTRA representatives were seeing a majority of their demands rejected despite a nearly unanimous strike vote, a Deadline story quoted unnamed executives detailing a strategy to bleed striking writers until they come crawling back.
Days later, when an actors’ strike seemed imminent, Disney Chief Executive Bob Iger took time away from the Sun Valley Conference in Idaho not to offer compromise but to lecture. He told CNBC’s David Faber that the unions’ refusal to help out the studios by taking a lesser deal is “very disturbing to me.”
“There’s a level of expectation that they have that is just not realistic,” Iger said. “And they are adding to the set of the challenges that this business is already facing that is, quite frankly, very disruptive.”
If Iger thought his attempt to exec-splain the situation would make actors think twice about walking out, he was very much mistaken. Instead, he handed SAG-AFTRA President Fran Drescher the perfect opportunity for the kind of speech usually shouted atop the barricades.
“We are the victims here,” she said Thursday, marking the start of the actors’ strike. “We are being victimized by a very greedy entity. I am shocked by the way the people that we have been in business with are treating us. I cannot believe it, quite frankly: How far apart we are on so many things. How they plead poverty, that they’re losing money left and right, when giving hundreds of millions of dollars to their CEOs. It is disgusting. Shame on them. They stand on the wrong side of history at this very moment.”
Cue the cascading strings of “Les Mis,” bolstered by images of the most famous people on the planet walking out in solidarity: the cast of “Oppenheimer” leaving the film’s London premiere; the writers and cast of “The X-Files” reuniting on the picket line.
A few days later, Barry Diller, chairman and senior executive of IAC and Expedia Group and a former Hollywood studio chief, suggested that studio executives and top-earning actors take a 25% pay cut to bring a quick end to the strikes and help prevent “the collapse of the entire industry.”
When Diller is telling executives to take a pay cut to avoid destroying their industry, it is no longer a strike, or even two strikes. It is a last-ditch attempt to prevent le déluge.
Yes, during the 2007-08 writers’ strike, picketers yelled noncomplimentary things at executives as they entered their respective lots. (“What you earnin’, Chernin?” was popular at Fox, where Peter Chernin was chairman and chief executive.) But that was before social media made everything more immediate, incendiary and personal. (Even if they have never seen a movie or TV show, one would think that people heading up media companies would understand how media actually work.)
Even at the most heated moments of the last writers’ strike, executives like Chernin and Iger were seen as people who could be reasoned with — in part because most of the executives were running studios, not conglomerations, but mostly because the pay gap between executives and workers, in Hollywood and across the country, had not yet widened to the reprehensible chasm it has since.
Now, the massive eight- and nine-figure salaries of studio heads alongside photos of pitiably small residual checks are paraded across legacy and social media like historical illustrations of monarchs growing fat as their people starve. Proof that, no matter how loudly the studios claim otherwise, there is plenty of money to go around.
Topping that list is Warner Bros. Discovery Chief Executive Davd Zaslav. Having re-named HBO Max just Max and made cuts to the beloved Turner Classic Movies, among other unpopular moves, Zaslav has become a symbol of the cold-hearted, highly compensated executive that the writers and actors are railing against.
The ferocious criticism of individual executives’ salaries has placed Hollywood’s labor conflict at the center of the conversation about growing wealth disparities in the U.S., which stokes, if not causes, much of this country’s political divisions. It also strengthens the solidarity among the WGA and SAG-AFTRA and with other groups, from hotel workers to UPS employees, in the midst of disputes during what’s been called a “hot labor summer.”
Unfortunately, the heightened antagonism between studio executives and union members also appears to leave little room for the kind of one-on-one negotiation that helped end the 2007-08 writers’ strike. Iger’s provocative statement, and the backlash it provoked, would seem to eliminate him as a potential elder statesman who could work with both sides to help broker a deal.
Absent Diller and his “cut your damn salaries” plan, there are few Hollywood figures with the kind of experience, reputation and relationships to fill the vacuum.
At this point, the only real solution has been offered by actor Mark Ruffalo, who recently suggested that workers seize the means of production by getting back into the indie business, which is difficult to imagine and not much help for those working in television.
It’s the AMPTP that needs to heed Iger’s admonishment. At a time when the entertainment industry is going through so much disruption, two strikes is the last thing anyone needs, especially when the solution is so simple. If the studios don’t want a full-blown revolution on their hands, they’d be smart to give members of the WGA and SAG-AFTRA contracts they can live with."
#sag-aftra strike#sag strike#fans4wga#writers guild strike#actors guild strike#union solidarity#wga strong#i stand with the wga#wga strike#writers strike
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Your fics kill me and bring me back to life queen! Requesting Joel and fem!reader almost dying from a clicker attack; Joel and her end up getting blood stained, give each other a bath in the same tub, and talk about what’s to come.
AN | This concept is both so sad but so soft ❤️
Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Warnings | Language
Word Count | 1.9k
Masterlist | Joel, Main
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Both you and Joel were covered in blood, guts, and bits of brain.
You’d been doing your best not to cry, trying to remain somewhat composed but it was hard. The tears were welling up in your eyes but none of them had managed to roll down your cheeks just yet. You were fighting them back; you knew that once the tears started it would open the floodgates and all the pent up emotions would come right out.
Joel, meanwhile, looked almost…fine. Not fine, but not like you, ready to fall apart at any moment. You supposed that he was more used to it, the violence and gore, while you were still fairly…unfamiliar. Admittedly, you had very little ‘real’ world experience compared to Joel. You knew that one day, you’d probably come across the infected, but you hadn’t expected that it would come close to costing you your life.
Your partner had been all but silent as he sprang into action to help save you while you panicked, screamed, and cried, probably attracting almost everything around you. Joel had remained the image of cool and collected as he took them all down to make sure you were safe.
Once you were safe and accounted for, he’d hauled you to your feet and started making his way back home, keeping you close behind. Neither of you spoke a word, the silence loud enough to speak volumes.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
By the time you got back to the home you shared with Joel, you felt like you were on the verge of a mental breakdown. You closed the door behind the two of you, before leaving against it and sliding to the floor, in a small heap of sobs. You weren’t able to contain the emotions any longer and they all spilled out at once. You didn’t even care that you were dirty and smelly, you just couldn’t be bothered to keep going at that moment.
Joel had already started making his way upstairs but stopped dead in his tracks as soon as he heard your first sob. He turned back around and quickly made his way over to you, dropping to his knees right to see what was going on.
“Hey,” he whispered softly, reaching for your face and gently taking it in his hands. He hated to see you crying, especially right now, when you had just had a near death experience. Joel brushed your tears away, trying to hide his frown when he noticed all the grime and blood still sticking to your skin. He wished you hadn’t had to experience such a thing; he’d tried to protect but failed. He could have, should have, done more, “baby, you’re alright. It’s okay, I’m right here. I’ve got you.”
You managed a small nod, your lip trembling as a few more tears ran down your cheeks. Joel gently shushed you before pulling you into his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around you. With the little energy and strength you had remaining, you hugged him back, burying your face into his chest. He held you for a while, letting you get out your tears, and occasionally offering you a few gentle words of reassurance. When you felt like you were all dried up and your throat was raw, you pulled back and looked at him with puffy, red eyes and a forlorn expression on your face.
“You’re going to be okay,” he promised, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “I swear it.”
“Joel,” you managed to choke out his name, “I…today...it was horrible.”
“I know,” he brushed his knuckles along your cheek, his heart hurting for what you had just been through. He’d gone through it enough times himself and had gotten to the point where he had become almost numb to it all. It was a horrible thing really, to become so desensitized to actions that had once been considered carnage. He was silent for a few moments, unsure of what to say. There wasn’t much to say and he couldn’t just turn back time, “it becomes easier over time, but I don’t want it to become easier for you. I don’t want you to have to go through that again.”
“But,” you looked at him with wide eyes as you grabbed his hands and held them tightly in yours. You’d been so caught up in your own woes that you hadn’t even considered how Joel could have been feeling, “are you okay?”
“Yeah,” he offered you a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, that didn’t quite feel genuine, “I’m alright.”
“Are you?” your question came softly, whispered just loud enough for him to hear. He paused for a moment before hanging his head and giving it a gentle shake. You breathed in softly and exhaled through your nose before wrapping your arms around his neck and giving him a tight hug, squeezing him with everything you had, “I love you.”
“I love you,” he murmured softly as he buried himself in you, breathing in your soft scent and allowing it to wash over him.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
After a short while, you slowly untangled yourselves before making your way upstairs to the bathroom. You were almost desperate to get the dirt and grime and whatever else was on your body so you could feel like a human again.
When you got upstairs and into the bathroom, Joel immediately turned on the shower, getting it just as warm as you liked. He turned to you, slowly and reverently starting to peel off your clothes. You lifted your arms as so he could remove your shirt, a small sound escaping your lips as the cloth stuck to a few of the superficial wounds you’d managed to obtain. It already felt a million times better just to be free of your shirt, which was quickly followed by your bra.
Joel’s touch was gentle as he undid the button of your jeans before helping you to step out of them and kicking them to the side to get them as far away as possible. Your underwear was next and you left standing there naked. It didn’t matter though; just shedding the layers allowed you to feel a million times better.
You wiped some of the grim from your face before motioning for Joel to step closer to you. He did so, his face becoming more gentle as he watched you. You reached for the hem of his henley, slowly pulling it over his head and tossing it into the pile of your clothes. Your lips pulled into a small frown when you realized that his ribs and shoulder were already starting to bruise. You trailed your fingers softly along his skin, tutting under your breath.
“It doesn’t hurt that bad,” he insisted, which you knew was only for your benefit, “nothing I haven’t dealt with before.”
“Doesn’t mean I have to like it,” you insisted, reaching for his belt buckle and slowly undoing it before and tugging his jeans down his legs. Joel pulled down his boxers before kicking it all away, “I already feel better. Just having the gross clothes gone.”
He made a small sound in response before pulling the shower curtain back so you could get inside and under the warmth of water. You let out an audible sigh at the feeling of the warm water cascading all over your skin. Joel stepped in after you, shoulders sagging with relief that the day was over and that you were both home safe.
“C’mere,” he grabbed your shoulders and tenderly traded places with you. He grabbed the shampoo bottle, pouring some into his hand before moving to wash your hair. You tried to ignore the water that was running off your bottles and red swirls that ran down the drain. It was over and you were okay. Joel started to lather the shampoo into your hair, massaging your scalp just how he knew you loved. You had to work to keep in the moan that threatened to spill out of your mouth at the feeling.
He worked in silence for a while as you tried to relax and forget about the horrors of the day. It was when he was about halfway through conditioning your hair, you realized that tears had run down your face. When you stepped under the water to rinse your hair, Joel wiped away your tears, which managed to bring the smallest smile to your face.
Once your hair was washed, you went to reach for the bar of soap but Joel beat you to it, working quickly to get your body clean and wash away the rest of dirt and grime that had been left on your body.
“Thank you,” you whispered softly, throwing your arms around his neck and pulling him in for a tight hug. The two of you stayed that way for a while, until you felt yourself start to get pruney, “come on, handsome. It’s my turn to get you all clean.”
Joel knew better than to argue with you, and admittedly loved getting his hair washed just as much as you did. You took your time to make sure he was just as clean as you were, pressing gentle kisses to his shoulders and neck. At one point, he took your face in his hands and kissed you until you were breathless. You let him hold you until the water ran cold and both of you were ready to get into pajamas and get into bed.
Once you got out of the shower and dried off, you stole a shirt and a pair of boxers from Joel and slipped into them before getting into bed for some much needed rest. Joel followed suit and quickly joined you in the bed, letting out a groan at the comfort of being clean and in bed with you.
He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you into his warm frame so he was your big spoon. You put your hand on top of his and offered it a gentle squeeze. He pressed a kiss to your shoulder before whispering in your ear, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you responded, “thank you for protecting me today. I don’t…I don’t know what I would have done without you today. I might be-”
“Shh,” he cut you off, “don’t say anything else. You don’t have to. We’re here now, safe.”
“Yeah,” you cleared your throat in an effort not to cry, “I’m glad for that.”
“Me too,” he promised, “me too.”
It wasn’t long after that until you both managed to fall asleep.
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x fem!reader#joel miller one shot#joel miller imagine#pedro pascal
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Loyalty (I)
Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!reader
summary: the king decides it's time for his brother to produce more targaryen heirs. who better than another hightower daughter to carry them?
warnings: adults only, all characters over 18, dubcon smut in later chapters, arranged marriage, abortion allusion (moon tea), coercion, terrible parenting
word count: 2.3k
dividers
“I won’t allow it.”
“You won’t allow it?” Viserys asks with an air of frigid humor. “Who are you to deny your king what he has commanded?”
Otto seethes, decades of practiced court manners faltering under the demand. “Forgive me, Your Grace, but she is my daughter. I will not have her married off to a man whose love of violence and debauchery trails him like a shadow. She is a pious child. To marry her to Daemon is—“
“A blessing. She will marry a prince and a valiant knight.”
The other men at the table are silent. They'd expected talks of reinforcing the kingdom's claim on the Stepstones or of quelling rumors that had cropped up of Daemon corrupting his young niece in a brothel a year prior. The king commanding a marriage between Otto Hightower's youngest daughter—his only child from a tragically short second marriage—is an unpleasant surprise.
"He is already married."
Viserys gives a taut smile. "Daemon's marriage to Lady Royce has been annulled. By royal decree and with the blessing of the High Septon. It is in the best interest of Westeros that the Targaryen line remains vast and strong and it has been decided your daughter will do what Lady Royce did not."
Otto's face falls in disbelief. He's heard nothing of it. This had been set up to corner him. "She is a child."
"She is nearly four years older than Alicent was when we wed. The queen has proven your daughters are strong vessels for Targaryen children."
"It is different. She is different. She is not as strong as Alicent."
The king shakes his head. "I will hear no more discussion of this. She will wed Daemon and this feud between the two of you shall end once and for all.”
Alicent’s touch is feather-light as she takes hold of your hands. Her eyes wander across your form, taking in the exquisite ivory gown. Its crimson embroidered dragon along the skirt a special request from your soon-to-be husband. “You look beautiful, sister.”
You can say nothing to your half-sister, barely able to retain the tears brimming in silence. A fortnight was all you’d been given to prepare to wed the vilest creature in Westeros. Daemon Targaryen was all you could have ever hoped against in a husband.
Your father stands tall behind Alicent, head held high. "The image of the Maiden herself."
A choked sob escapes you at his words. This marriage was punishment by the Seven for every sin you'd ever committed. For the impure thoughts you'd had of knights. The white lies you'd spoken to save yourself the wrath of Septa Agerrea. The gambling you'd participated in when you’d bet your favorite embroidery needle in a game of cards with Lysa Tyrell. Had you only followed the Faith more faithfully, this torture would not be yours to endure.
“I believe it is time to take your place with the king, Your Grace,” your father says.
Alicent hesitates with glossy eyes. She draws you into a tight hug and whispers an apology and how much she loves you. You have the faintest memory of her wedding to the king a few years before. The happy sister who’d spent hours braiding your hair when the handmaidens failed to do it properly disappeared into a hardened queen round with child seemingly overnight. The smiles and giggles you’d shared daily turned to fond, distant memories. She withdraws a moment later, wiping at her face.
When the door shuts your father moves behind you. You watch in the ornate mirror as he drapes the green maidencloak of House Hightower across your shoulders. The new burden's weight feels uncomfortable.
He returns to stand before you, his expression sorrowful. "I am sorry, my sweet child, for this atrocity. You deserve far better.”
“I could have saved myself this fate had I been less worldly and become a Septa.” Your palm wipes at the tear that had fallen.
He cups your cheek. “Perhaps. But we cannot lament on what we could have done. Indeed we must focus instead on your duty to the realm.”
“To be a good wife,” you state. It was what he had raised you to be.
“No, sweet child,” he says softly, “I fear that I must ask something far more difficult of you. For your duty to the realm must supplant your duty in marriage.”
The wedding takes place in a haze. You tremble, stumble over words, and can not meet the eyes of your now husband nor the Septon. Soon you would betray them both.
For the good of the realm.
You do not eat or drink through the feast. You barely speak. You think you might have danced, though all you remember of it is a blurring background and an embroidered dragon that matches your own. It had stared at you accusingly.
“Shall I call for the bedding ceremony to begin, brother?” the king slurs loudly. If there had been anything in your stomach, it surely would have come out now. It was one vile thought to have him touch you. But to have other men undress you as well?
Your hand is pulled from your lap, enclosed in another twice its size, callous and rough against your skin. For the first time that day you look at your husband. You’d never seen him this close. The lavender gaze cannot have been of this world. It’s too vibrant, too knowing. “Too many of the men here have wandering hands. I’d hate to spill blood on such a blessed day.” His lips brush against your hand. “My sweet wife should not have to endure such tragedy.”
The king responds dismissively. Something of disappointing guests, but to do as he pleases. Daemon takes it as a dismissal and pulls you from your seat. The last thing you hear is the call from many about bloody sheets.
Perhaps the Mother has decided to take mercy on you. For you cannot breathe as the doors to the prince’s chambers close behind you. Death can take you before he can.
He stands in front of the fire, pouring some drink into a goblet. The flickering orange light suits him. Like he was born for flames. “You must relax. There is nothing for you to fear from me.” A lie. There was much to fear from him.
A booming knock echoes through the room.
“Enter.”
Two servants carrying trays of bread and fruit enter. Then they are gone just as swiftly. The door closes once more.
“You must eat,” he says, taking your hand once more and leading you to a small table. You sit and a piece of bread is offered. You take it and, after an expectant nod, take a bite. It’s still warm and soft. You take another bite. And another.
It’s gone quickly. Too quickly for a lady. A bowl of berries clatters softly in front of you. You pick at it slower, though not as slowly as you’d like. They are sweet. Perfectly ripe.
“Would you like some wine?”
Despite the juice of berries coating your tongue, your mouth is dry as you speak for the first time since you’d said your vows. “Yes, please.”
“So well mannered.” A smug smile spreads across his face as he raises his goblet and sips. He reaches over and sets it down beside the half-empty bowl. “I forgot to have them retrieve another cup.”
The crimson red liquid ripples. A challenge.
“You are very gracious, my Prince. Thank you.” You lift it by the stem and drink. It was stronger than you’ve ever had before. The taste takes you aback, coughing as it soaks your tongue. Hastily you set the cup back down.
"I take it you don't often indulge in Dornish Reds."
"No, never."
His head cocks to the side appraisingly. "I suppose such a thing has never been offered to you before. Not within the confines of your father's authority. He has given you a rather sheltered life."
A prickly heat seeps up your neck. "My father did not confine or shelter me. He has only ever guided me to live as virtuously as the Seven wished for all their children to live.”
“How very kind of him to not let you endure the same vices as himself.”
You blink, his words sinking in. The implication that your father is a drunkard stings. He isn't, but you don’t fight his accusation. Selfishly, you do not wish to defend your father. Instead, you pluck a berry from the bowl, hoping to end the conversation entirely.
"Are the berries quite good?"
You nod, not wanting to speak again.
"Might I have one?" When you go to pick up the bowl, he stops you. "Pick me out the best one."
The best one? The bowl is still half full. Which berry was the best? Would he be disappointed if you picked one he did not like? Or one that was not ripe enough? Not sweet enough? What would he do to you if he disliked the one you chose?
It was the largest blackberry that you finally settle on, prepared to hear how terrible the choice had been as you hold it out to him. He doesn't simply take it. He leans over the table, taking the berry and your fingers into his mouth.
The act is heinously intimate. It leaves you frozen and breathless as he pulls away, his eyes alight in devious amusement. "I'm not sure which taste I prefer. The berry's or your's."
Fire spreads across your cheeks. You flinch away, embarrassed. In the escape effort your arm knocks against the goblet. To your horror, it clatters against the table. The liquid sloshes across your front, staining the white gown.
The crimson seems to seep from your womb, condemning you for something you had yet to do. You paw at the stain as the chair clatters on the ground from the force with which you'd stood.
Tears brim in your eyes as it continues to spread.
“There's no need to fret. It is only wine.”
“I have desecrated it.” The tears have not stopped falling and your hands have not stopped scrubbing at it with your fingers. “The stain will never come out.”
“It is only a dress.” He cups your face, encouraging you to meet his gaze. It searches for some understanding.
He would never understand.
“I am so sorry, my Prince.”
He shushes you softly and places a kiss against your forehead. This was the monster? The vile, unholy beast whose every action was an affront to the Seven? This man who had shown you nothing but kindness?
You cry harder.
He is not the monster.
You are.
You aren’t sure how long you cry. But he holds you through it all. He speaks little more than a few consoling phrases, but it is more than you deserve. His presence, arms around you, kisses on your hair. All of it more than you deserve.
You’re finally calm, only left with sniffles, when he says, “We should get the dress to the washwomen before the stain sets.” What good would it do? The stain can never be removed from your soul. Still you agree and turn for him.
His fingers are swift as they loosen the strings of your bodice. Practiced. He is practiced. Behind closed doors you assume, but there were numerous tales of his public debauchery. It has been gossiped that he prefers the thrill of open affairs and touches of multiple women.
“Why did you refuse the bedding ceremony?”
He pauses. “Did you wish to have one?”
“No,” you say quickly. “But given your…tendencies I…I thought…” A quiet hum has your words trailing off.
His work continues, though slower. “You are not a whore in a brothel.”
“Neither is your niece and yet...”
Air blows across your neck as he chuckles. “Has my pious little wife been gossiping about the chastity of the Crowned Princess?”
Your lungs seize at the realization of what you’d just said. It’s treason. Questioning her virtue is treason.
“Relax, jaesa.” His hands slip between the shoulders of your shift and the loose gown, pushing the sleeves down your arms. “I took you under my protection today. You may speak freely to me.”
“I,” you hesitate, freeing your hands of the garment, “I had heard that a year ago you snuck the princess from the castle and—“
He bunches the fabric at your waist and tugs. “Had my way with her in some brothel?”
“Yes.”
The gown struggles for a moment, snagging on the curve of your behind. Another tug and it is a pile around your feet. “My niece wished to see King’s Landing. I showed her and returned her to the castle, still a fair maiden like yourself.”
“Of course.”
“You doubt me?”
“No, my Prince.”
"It would do a great disservice to our union to begin it with lies." He prompts you to turn and hesitantly you do. He is shorter than your father, yet his presence is as commanding. More so. It makes you aware of how thin the fabrics of your shifts were when his gaze drifts down. "My niece's heart belongs elsewhere. As do my desires."
His touch is gentle as he cups your cheek, but the feeling's it stirred are rough and uncertain. Bordering on traitorous.
“Shall I call a servant to fetch the dress?” The words waver. You wonder if they’re comprehensible at all.
They are, it seems as he rejects the offer and slips out the door himself with the dress. The reprieve from his watchful, astute eye is welcome. You fall to your knees at the edge of the bed and recite the prayer your father had taught you minutes before you’d been led down the aisle.
Warrior, give me strength for what I must do. It is for the good of the realm.
Mother, forgive me for what I must do. It is for the good of your faithful servants.
Stranger, lead my children to peace. It is for the good of their innocent souls.
a/n: all your thoughts and reblogs are appreciated 🌺
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#daemon targeryen x reader#daemon targaryen x you#daemon targaryen smut#targaryen x reader#hotd x reader#loyalty
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First time
Wanda maximoff x fem reader
Word Count:2,061
Summary: When an old friend of your mother comes to visit you you don't like me at all but when you saw the beautiful red-haired woman those thoughts quickly disappeared
Warnings: Spanking, oral sex, rope ties, maybe corruption I don't know the truth tell me if I miss something :D
Note: English is not my mother tongue, so l apologize for any spelling mistake. It is also my first time publishing here so be kind I promise it will improve in the future T-T
You weren't happy when your mother told you that an old friend was going to stay with you, you appreciated the tranquility of the house since it was only the two of you and sometimes your other mother who came to visit you and who sometimes stayed for dinner if she stayed longer than expected but you were sure that she only did it to annoy your mother
You were an only child you didn't grow up with more children nearby if they weren't those at school, but you never invited them to your house since for you it was your sacred place, you didn't like them to invade those at the school that was yours
And it has been like that until your mother told you one day that her childhood friend was getting divorced and needed a place to clear her mind and relax, you were not nice at first you didn't want a stranger to live with you but after a few days you accepted it
You searched through your mother's things to find out who this supposed childhood friend was, it was not easy at first but after rummaging for a long time you found the old photos, without calculating that they were your age in the photo you smiled when you saw your mom hugging the woman, without a doubt you were impressed by her beauty, you wondered how it ended up divorced since the person undoubtedly must have been an idiot to leave a tremendous woman, after a while you put everything away and went to your room thinking about the woman Mysterious that she was going to move
The day came quickly, you saw the woman get out of a beautiful red car you laughed internally since it was almost the same as her hair, you came down from your room and went to say hello, your mother hugged her tightly and she also stayed a little behind waiting for their intimate moment to end, when they let go you saw how the woman stayed looking at you you felt a little uncomfortable since her gaze was intense and intimidating
"Oh honey, she's Wanda, the friend I told you was going to stay with us for a while," your mother commented happily as she brought you closer to greet Wanda
"When you leave" you didn't know why you had said, you didn't mean that, when you realized the words you had said you wanted to apologize immediately but the laughter he let out left you blank
"Wow, I see that you took out your other mother's attitude" you were frozen not knowing what to say fortunately your mother saved you
"Don't pay attention to her Wanda, and/it's a little difficult but I'm sure they'll get along amazing"
"I know we'll do it Agatha" Wanda says while winking at you quickly your cheeks blushed and the slight heating of this one bothered you
Both women laughed and went inside the house leaving you there alone processing what happened without a doubt it was going to be a difficult few months
──────•❥❥❥•──────
The first week flew by, you were careful you tried not to be in the same places as Wanda and it's not that you and your mother lived in a very big house they only had the first floor and on the second were the rooms next to the bathroom that was only yours but with Wanda here you have had to share it with her
The bathroom has been a big problem that right now you would like to just occupy the bathroom that Agatha has there in her room
Wanda has a big problem with not closing the lock when she bathes or occupies the first time you ran out slamming the door and the image of her silhouette that was shown on the screens was engraved in your head, at first you thought she was forgetful and that she was used to it since she was a married woman so you assumed that couples did not close the doors but then seeing her go out with her towel and wink you began to doubt that
The second time it happened it was worse since you were brushing your teeth and Wanda came in alone in a towel you were frozen not knowing what to do or say she just smiled at you and took off the towel leaving it in all its glory and then entered the shower, you quickly spit out the toothpaste and ran out to lock yourself in your room that day you didn't even go out to eat for your luck you always have sweets to eat
Since then you avoid Wanda as you can, you try to occupy your mother's bathroom just making an excuse that yours is being occupied with Wanda, it's time for dinner you invent a quick excuse saying that you are hungry just to go down when everyone is asleep and serve you a plate of food
In fact, right now you're warming up your food, it was already past 12:00, your mother was fast asleep and you assumed that Wanda too, I wish you had noticed the reddish monster that she wasn't happy with your attitude, I wish you hadn't gone down to eat that night
You decided to make yourself a dessert with apples so you were cutting one, you were so focused that you didn't notice the person who was surrounding you, until a body pushed you slightly into the kitchen cabinet
"That does a sweet thing cutting with a sharp knife" you were frozen not knowing what to do it took you a while to react
"I just want to eat apple" you spoke quickly Wanda denied and gently took the knife out of your hand
"You shouldn't do it alone, a delicate thing shouldn't have something so sharp in its hands" she began to cut while she still had you trapped against the furniture
"I'm not a little girl" you claimed a serious mistake from you and your big mouth
"I see that you still have that attitude, maybe I should punish you for being insolent with older people" Wanda laughed bitterly and then left the knife aside, you wondered what was going through the older woman's head but it didn't take you long to think since Wanda in a quick movement pulled down your pants leaving you alone in your pink panties baby
"Wanda, what are you doing?" you said while trying to get closer to your pants that were on your feet
"Shhh calm down just let me do what I have to do" she tried to calm you down but seeing that your hands just wanted to recover your pants she sighed "little one you leave me no choice but to tie you up"
Wanda waved her hand and a soft pink fabric appeared. She quickly tied your hands and legs leaving you motionless. Your heart was beating a thousand. You didn't know whether to scream for your mother to come down or just let the woman get away with it.
"Calm down I promise you'll like it, you just need to shut up or you would like your mother to see how her best friend gets away with her with her little daughter" you quickly shook your head the idea alone makes you vomit "I knew you were good at listening, now my question is how many spankings do you think is right for you" you stayed for a while thinking about an answer to give her
"Maybe 20 sounds good" she laughed her hands moved everywhere in your body
"If 20 sounds like a good number for your first punishment, count for me but not so strong little one we don't want your mother to discover us"
The first spanking was delicate it almost didn't hurt it was a soft blow you wondered if all the punishment was going to be that easy but how wrong you were, the next blows came more rudely you were almost sure it wasn't 20 spankings since after the 13th your mind only focused on how your ass started to hurt and how your pussy started to get wet
"Look what a dirty girl, I knew you weren't as innocent as you showed yourself" Wanda was fascinated with how red your ass was, she was only supposed to come to challenge you for eating so late but your little attitude that you gave her the first day was engraved in her mind, she had found her little doll to break and corrupt to her liking
Her trip was supposed to be only temporary she was going to enjoy her loneliness and learn to be alone, her divorce was not easy for Wanda in fact she didn't want to separate from him but things got complicated and she couldn't anymore
But you were refreshing, someone new full of innocence and purity you were the light that Wanda needed in this darkness and I didn't plan to miss this opportunity for any reason
"Look at your princess parts, I'm sure you feel uncomfortable down there" you didn't know if I had to answer but you did
"It feels sticky Wanda" she carefully lowered your panties without disturbing your reddish ass your pussy was dripping it was a divine image
She carefully brought a finger closer to your swollen clitoris you jumped a little because of her touch in your area but as fast as the movement was she moved away "tell me little one have you ever touched yourself down there"
"No, I've never done it" Wanda smiled to herself without realizing it, it only made Wanda's desire grow more in her and she wanted to make you hers forever
"Well then I'll be careful, I promise to take care of you" before putting her fingers on you she carefully untied the ties that tied you leaving you free, she grabbed you carefully making you lift your ass to leave your dripping pussy visible
Wanda thought to herself that it would be good for you, for your first time, without thinking much about things she bent down and ran her tongue through your folds you jumped at first because of the sensation but then without realizing it your hips grinded in her face
Wanda was delicate at first her movements had you hypnotized, she sucked your cloud gently and then did it again with force, you had to cover your mouth since you couldn't stand the noises
You could only hear the noises of Wanda eating you, her mouth was talented and her tongue had hypnotized you your cloud was fascinated with the circular movements that they were giving her without a doubt Wanda was a great expert in this
You felt a tingling in your stomach it was a delicious sensation until you thought you were going to urinate so you tried to move Wanda's face away from your pussy, she instead bit you something hard but not painful
"Wait Wanda, I think I'm going to pee" you tried to convince the woman to get out of there
"Don't worry, that's what it feels like to have an orgasm" Wanda reassured you, she went back to doing her thing until she guided one of her fingers and began to massage you
The tingling increased you tried to hold it a little but you couldn't, you had your first orgasm in your kitchen and it was delicious your body twisted because of the pleasure you were having, your flows increased Wanda quickly licked everything as if her life depended on her, when there was nothing left she walked away without kissing you there she went up your panties and then your pajama pants
She turned you delicately and kissed you, it was a slow and delicate kiss she guided you in everything since you didn't know how to kiss
"I knew you were a delight now go to your room and ah don't skip your meals again or I won't have to punish you again understood" you just nodded, you quickly ran out of there not without first giving Wanda a quick kiss and you went to your room thinking about what happened without a doubt it was a good idea that your mother had invited Wanda.
#wanda marvel#wanda maximoff#elizabeth olsen#wanda x y/n#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff x you#dark wanda maximoff#mommy wanda#wanda fanfic
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THE KID AT THE BACK
-theories
Did i sit down and analyze this game for 3 hours straight because I'm hyperfixated on it? Yes, yes i did.
This isnt proof-read and long as hell so buckle up for a joyride, y'all (by the way, there's another TKATB fanfic in the works as we speak and also some fanart, though I'm not sure wether to post it or not... well, we'll see!)
Some of these might not seem all too thought through (??) Since i was kind of grasping at straws here (and it was like 2 a.m. lmao), so if y'all have questions/need me to elaborate or have theories of your own feel free to share!
(There's some inspiration here from other people in the Fandom, most of them from the community section on itch.io which isnt available any more)
Sol knows the player longer than we think
My theory ->
-Fantasia stated that one of her 3 biggest inspirations was the game AMNESIA
-In amnesia the mc loses her memory in an accident. One of the love interests is her childhood friend and also the only yandere in the game (at least from what i could find out)
-She already drew Sol with Forget-me-nots and in the valentines day special the boquet sol gave us also contained Forget-me-nots
-In the book (this gallery thing with all the cutscene images) on the top of sols page is written 'Remember Me' which implies we forgot about him
-Annabel Lee Poem:
+The poem contains the line 'I was a child, she was a child' which furthermore implies that Sol and MC knew each other as kids
+Except for the last two paragraphs the poem is written in past tense, which could be talking about sols POV with us
Perhaps MC had an accident, as mentioned above, and MCs father (highborn kinsmen) tore MC away from Sol to the countryside
+The poem mentions angels killing annabel lee which could also mean something like this: MC doesnt die but, however, gets amnesia. That way, the MC sol knows and loves is dead because MC no longer exists the way MC did before (also the fact that she forgot him)
Some people theorize MCs farm is near the sea and that is the reason why sol hates the sea (i believe the city is near the sea and that's where MC 'died' (maybe MC almost drowned and got Amnesia that way?(apparently its possible for people who almost drowned to get amnesia)))
+"The speaker loves annabel lee to the point of death and even after death" (MCs view how to interpret the poem) (-> Sol loves MC to 'death' (the day they got amnesia) and even after 'death' (after MC got amnesia and 'died' in a sense, as a person))
-sol says he thinks death is beautiful, i didn't really know what to make of that, the only conclusion i came to would be: If MC actually did drown and lose their memories due to that, sol might have been involved in MC drowning (or at least blames himself for that) but viewed MC losing their memories as a 'second chance' with them, since they can start from anew (perhaps he made some mistakes with MC in the past which all eventually built up to MC drowning (it could be that we were already teens at that point)
-sol states afterwards: "But people refused them to let them be together, as if fate refuses them to die together" which supports my theory that MC was taken from Sol by someone (most likely the father after he witnessed Sols behaviour and his final straw was MC drowning because of him) the 'let them die together' could mean something like their relationship 'dying' and then starting over again or perhaps he tried to die with them, who knows (all this is really far fetched i am grasping at straws here lmao)
-in a really quick scene right after he mutters "I'm won't let it happen to me... not again" (some people view this as Sol already lost someone he loved dearly but it could also be the MC who was taken from him
ANOTHER THING I COULD IMAGINE -ABOUT DYING TOGETHER COULD BE:
MC almost died, Sol went after them but they were already saved, Sol just didnt witness that and almost died himself/wanted to die but was saved from that by someone (maybe hyugo? Though, he is an exchange student)
-Another theory on hyugo. It's canon that he is an exchange student, however i do believe he is from this city (since he knows about the hierarchy and his brother Geo apparently is no exchange student), moved away and is now back for business (relating to his 'mafia schemes' but under the disguise of being an exchange student)
Maybe he moved around the same time MC left or some time after that
-Hyugo mentions on the rooftop that we remind him of someone and the pronoun of the person he refers to changes based on the one the player picked for the MC in the beginning. It could mean we remind him of someone else entirely, someone maybe not even related to sol (though i doubt that) or to the MC and he knows them from back then but maybe thought MC died as well and cant believe they actually survived (maybe he want to spike MCs memory by doing that)
-A dream within a dream: MC mentions that this poem, at least to them, talks about the uncertainty about something, like life (which could also imply that they might be uncertain about some things in their mife because they simply forgot them due to amnesia)
-THE SECOND DAY 'THE KINGDOM'
+some people think the kingdom (by the sea) refers to MCs farm and implies its near the sea, however in day 2 we find out about the hierarchy in the city and considering my theory that MC actually is from the city and almost drowned there, i believe the kingdom by the sea is the city. MC does mention in the beginning that they lived on the farm ever since they were a child, however, it could very well be that we moved there right after the incident that caused MCs amnesia (if MC was akid when it happened it would really matter because then it would still fit with the fact that they lived there since theyre a child, however if they were already a teen, perhaps the father moved there immediately to cut off all ties to Sol and told us we have always lived there on top of that (considering the previous theories)
The father also didnt seem fond of the idea that we go to the city (the fact that he is is indebted to someone from high class could imply he might be from there), that could be because he knows how dangerous the city is (and how we could potentially meet sol again)
-maybe the reason for the debt is that MCs father suddenly bought the farm land to get us away from the city as soon as possible and had to take on a loan from one of his contacts in the city
-we know that this is MCs last year at the university, if we say shes minimum 22, and was already in the school for 4 years that would mean she got there at 18. If the 'drowning theory' events took place when MC was a teen (like 16 maybe) it would explain why the father was indebted (i also think 2 years is an believable timeframe a higher class person would give someone to pay off their debt)
-at the end of day 2 sol says he's sorry for leaving us and "i dont know what I'll do if..." which supports my theory that he lost us once (and he blames himself as the reason (again, MC drowning?))
-inspirations:
+ https://www.tumblr.com/sweet-herbal-peach-tea/746168072919023616/tkatb-theories?source=share
+ https://itch.io/t/3749638/whats-the-secret-between-hyugo-and-sol
Another theory:
Sleepy Hollow and The kid at the back
-In the nicknames the boys have for MC (fantasia released that on twitter and tumblr) sol calls MC pumpkin (like the pumpkin of the headless horseman (also in the gallery there is a pumpkin above the book)) and Crowe calls them '(star-crossed) lover'
Star-crossed lovers are people who love each other but can't be together
I believe this might imply that, even though Crowe is the second romance option, MC can't be with him no matter what they do
I also found out that the nickname is a phrase from romeo and juliet (which furthermore implies crowe will die)
We know what romeo and juliet is about: romeo and juliet cant be together because their families are enemies (some people believe Crowes father might be them man MCs father owes money to(i personally doubt thah though but it would support this romeo and juliet situation)) and at the end romeo thinks that juliet died, kills himself and then juliet turns out to not be dead but kills herself after seeing romeo dead
-Jericho Ichabod is a character from Sleepy Hollow, along Katrina (the FMC who owns a farm (what a coincidence)) and Brom Bones (its implied he is the headless horseman). In the story, jericho courts Katrina at a party, she rejects him and on his way home the headless horseman kills him (in the scene where Sol accompanies MC to class he says 'it's always been you ichabod' which could furthermore imply that crowe or his family have something do to with the fact that Sol and MC arent together)
In the library scene with Crowe he asks MC about their opinion on marie Antoinette and when MC says something negative about her, his reaction seems kind of strange. MC also brought a book about torture devices and execution methods and in that book is a picture of 'The Executioner' and he has scars on his arms, wears a mask and a chained collar. This correlates with some of sols features. He has scars on his arms (as seen in one of fantasias drawings), wears a chocker (he also wears a mask when he breaks into MCs room but that's really something anyone who does that would do). This implies even more that he will kill crowe.
#tkatb sol#tkatb vn#the kid at the back#solivan brugmansia#Crowe#jericho ichabod#Crowe ichabod#sol brugmansia#yandere visual novel#yandere#yandere vn#tkatb#tkatb theory#tkatb crowe
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i recently found out max has a nipple piercing. would be over the moon to see this included into a fic?? 🤭🤭
oh nonnie, i’ve been having dreams about this ever since i saw those pictures & i had to zoom in like a crazy woman – totally not proud of it. but like i cannot stop thinking about this exact same scenario 🙂↔️🤌🏼 and i’ll not be judged! i know you have all been thinking the same thing.
content warnings ✶ disclaimers. fem!reader. a little bit of sub!max. nipple piercings. cumming in pants.
Max as a tight grip on your waist as you press kisses on his neck, knees pressing against his hips as you settle comfortably on his lap.
This is the first time you’re being physically intimate. Well, apart from a few shared kisses at the end of the three dates you’ve had since meeting outside of the grocery store; after Max bumped into you.
Max invited you to his apartment for a cozy night, he cooked for you and introduced you to his cats.
You had settle on the sofa, even sharing a blanket, to watch a movie but halfway through it you’d already climbed onto his lap. Movie long forgotten now.
Max sighs into the cold night air, his calloused hands sending shivers down your spine.
You place your hands on his chest to make him lean against the cushions of the couch when you hear it more than feel it: Max’s sharp intake of breath as your palms make contact with something hard and round across his nipples. You know what it is even before your brain has time to catch up with it.
Pulling away you look straight into the blue pool of his eyes. He’s blushing but you don’t know if it is due to your passionate make out session or because you found out he has nipple piercings.
Neither of you says anything, eye contact so intense it sends a heat wave directly to your core. You decide to test the waters, so you swipe your thumb over his left nipple, feeling the piercing against the pad of your fingers. Max gasps your name.
“So, when were you going to tell me about this?” You ask with a raised brow, still caressing his pierced nipple over his white shirt.
Max blinks twice, like trying to process what is going on, before tilting his head back and whispering, “I was going to get rid of them.”
“But why,” You look down and it’s almost funny how you didn’t notice them all night. They’re right there making fun of you. “I think they’re hot.”
He huffs, closing his eyes. He’s shy, you think.
“I want to hear the story behind this.” You pinch his right nipple, not wanting to make it feel left out and Max sees stars behind his eyes, a moan escaping his pink lips. “But now I want to…” When you don’t finish talking, Max forces himself to open his eyes. There is a hunger in your eyes that makes him realise that he would let you do anything, anything, if you ask him.
“What do you want?” He wants you to finish your thought, he needs it.
“I want to feel them in my mouth.”
You’re pouting. It feels as if you’re begging him to let you, but Max doesn’t need convincing. The image of you looking up at him with his pierced nipple in your mouth flashes through his mind, and his cock twitches in interest.
He gets rid of the shirt in record time.
“Lie back, please.” He does, back pressing against the soft cushions. You don’t break the eye contact, not as you kiss your way down his chest until you’re level with the pebbled flesh. A threaded barbell decorating both of his nipples.
Max follows your every move holding his breath.
The first run of your tongue over his nipple comes as a shock, even when he was waiting for it. His whole body thrums with pleasure when you take it between your teeth, a sound akin to a whimper echoing through the room.
“You’re very sensitive.” You save that knowledge in the back of your mind. He looks at you with furrowed brows when you raise your thumb to his face. “Open your mouth.” And he does it immediately, allowing you access. You don’t waste a moment in stuffing his mouth with it. And Max sucks and runs his tongue over it, the blue of his eyes swallowed by black and pure pleasure. “Good.” You purr, guiding your thumb and swiping over his other nipple. He shudders, arching his back when you pinch it.
You go back to sucking his nipple into your mouth, feeling the metallic taste of the piercing and how nice it feels against your tongue.
Max lets out a sharp gasp, his hips thrusting up into nothing. You continue to kiss and suck, alternating between them and marvelling at his reactions, his obscene moans and whimpers.
He’s spilling in his pants before he even has time to warn you. And you find it is the hottest thing you’ve ever experienced in your life.
do not repost, translate, plagiarise or claim any of my works as your own. | © verstappen-cult, 2024.
#꒰꒰ 📁 ─ verstappen cult files ꒱꒱#max verstappen x reader#f1 imagine#max verstappen smut#f1 fanfic#max verstappen fluff#f1 x reader
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['sex' by the 1975]
⤷ atsumu miya x f!reader; best friends, references to infidelity, pining, sexual content (w.c 3.1k)
“it’s not sex.” he insists between mouthfuls. a drop of mustard dots the corner of his mouth. you stare incredulously.
“are you joking?” you ask. atsumu just shrugs his shoulder, intense focus saved for the burger held in his hands. practically inhaling a third of it in one bite as he brings it up to his mouth.
“‘s not like it’s the real thing.” he bobs his head side to side in consideration of the sandwich before he’s grabbing at the fries in your lap, “can i haf some.”
the carton lays practically emptied from his pilfering next to your abandoned chicken nuggets. three remaining, absent of consumption in favor of a bewildered stare at the man seated beside you on his bed.
“fingering is penetration, that’s sex.” you say simply.
atsumu raises a brow, “yer gyno having sex with ya?”
“that’s different.” you level a stare at him, one that’s serious and fierce and that communicates everything you mean in the single look alone. he meets it with one of his own, familiarity and uncommunicated languages all the rage between the two of you. “she doesn't make me cum.”
“neither does yer boyfriend.” he shrugs, taking another large bite of his burger as you screech in offense. your hand meets his bicep with a sharp slap and he grabs at it in pain. “ow! ya were the one that told me that!”
”some people take a minute to figure it out.”
”sounds like its taking a lot longer than a minute.” he mutters to himself. “look, its a lost cause. just dump the guy before it gets anywhere. ya haven’t had sex yet, he’s got a weird face, dude cant tell a fake orgasm from a real one. why are ya fighting me on this?”
“fingering is sex! your body count would be zero if fingering didnt count.” you insist loudly and atsumu rolls his eyes. he crumples the foil his burger came in and throws it across the room, cheering loudly when it makes it into the bin in the corner of his room.
his room is much the same since the last time you visited. photos of passing years sit framed on the desk— an image of he and osamu with their arms wrapped around each other, taken right before atsumu left for the olympics. another of you and atsumu placed right next to it, you leaning over his shoulder and him laughing loudly, beer bottles held deftly in hands and drunken flushes decorating your faces. momentos of faded high school memories, interspersed with flashes of young adult realities.
its more sophisticated than it once was. minimal in furniture, and of the items that decorate the room they’re the perfect reflection of a twenty-four year old athlete. his closet is lined with designer gifted clothes, but his desk chair remains stacked with undone laundry, the basics of his everyday life found in the plush cushion more than on the hangers. the jacket you’re currently wearing was stolen from the top of that pile just after delivering a pointed comment at how cold he keeps his apartment.
its a far cry from the bedroom he used to share with his brother, the one you remember at the dusk of previous memories. it was cramped and contained, lines between the two boys constantly blurred and you having to learn rather quickly where to step and when. but even now, as he lives on his own in a city a bit further from you than you’re comfortable with, not much has changed. you still sit on the left side of the bed and he takes the right; you still eat burgers on his bed and steal his jackets, and he throws papers into trash bins and insists he could’ve made it professional were he not already in volleyball; you still moan and complain about the woes of daily life and he still listens to them endlessly, interjecting the same amount of dumb enthusiasm as you know him to have.
there is still much in common that remains between he and you. trusted familiarity, endless comfort; a bubble that remains whole and precious, unaltered despite life dealing its hand to you. you’re convinced there’s no one else in the world that gets you quite like atsumu does.
there’s also no one in the world that works you up, quite like atsumu does.
atsumu stands from the bed, retrieving your own trash from your lap and chucking the rest of it in the bin. lithe and lean, he moves with a body that is sculpted to perfection as he turns off the overhead light and instead turns on the desk lamp, submerging the room in the lowly warmth of its glow. days are shorter now and the sun has just made it return home, leaving you to the dim luster of a pleasant comfort.
its quiet, intimate. words entirely inappropriate to describe the weekly hangout with your best friend of seven years.
pushing thoughts aside, you fight to remember what the whole point of the conversation was about. a boyfriend, right. your boyfriend.
right.
“and he does not have a weird face, he’s just… interesting. it’s what i liked about him.”
“revolting. i’m this close to spiking a ball in his face. it would be plastic surgery for the dud.”
“you’re being mean.” you tell him.
atsumu scoffs loudly, “and yer being stupid! yer the one that’s complaining to me about it. yer really gonna date a guy who can’t figure it out when he fingers ya? what happens when ya actually have sex with the bozo?”
“it takes practice. i don’t blame him for not being able to get me there on the first try. i see him later tonight so i’ll talk to him about it. it’s hard to figure out how to turn someone on and then try to, you know, get me there—“
“woahwoahwoah—timeout.” atsumu hold his hands perpendicular to one another, forming a ‘t’. his eyebrows practically touch the hairline of his bleached hair. “he doesn't even turn you on?”
“not everyone is good at everything, like you.” you mean it sarcastically, but it comes out short and meek. it’s embarrassing to have to cover for the misgivings of your current beau, but there’s an obligation to. a point to make, especially to the man in front of you.
you’ve met the ex-girlfriends, heard their feedback for the man before you. an average of six out of ten in boyfriend material, but he knocks the ball out of the park when it comes to the bed—or so you’ve heard.
(aya, the most recent girl to have made her grand exit, followed you on instagram and asked you to not be a stranger. whether that was so she could have her in for atsumu or because she really wanted to be friends is still up for debate, but the gesture ended with a message in your directs.
[9:17] it sucks, he’ll always be more in love with volleyball than any girl he could ever date. and even if he didn’t, you’re his number two anyway, so there’s really no way i can win.
[9:20] i’m super sorry, aya. if it’s any consolation, i really liked you two together. he’s just slow, i’m sure you guys will figure it out.
[9:20] you were our biggest argument.
[9:20] so no, i don’t think we will.
[9:21] i’ll miss that dick tho, best orgasm of my life. rip
there’s not much you can say to a message like that. there’s not much you can say to the surge of smugness that courses through you either, so you don’t.
you don’t tell atsumu about it.)
“alright. sit up then.”
his voice startles you. “what?”
suddenly, he stands before the side of the bed, looming horribly tall over you as he peers down at you. he shoves his hands in the pockets of his gray sweatpants, the fabric unintentionally pulling down ever so slightly and the waistband of his black boxers peeking out in greeting. the light of the desklamp casts a halo over his silhouette.
your attention is drawn upward and it’s hard to deny the familiar pang that tends to strike through you every so often in times like this. the simple effect of being near him. atsumu is unfairly handsome, and while it’s hard to put a name to the feeling that pulses inside of you when the light catches him just right or when a smile is even more charming than usual, the ache is always the same.
it’s fleeting, you convince yourself. something you refuse to settle on for too long. contexts and suppressed hopes pushed to the back of your mind along with the other unspoken things.
“come on.” he gestures two fingers upward. “i’ll show ya how easy it is to turn a girl on.”
its curiosity that has you standing up on your knees on the comforter, nothing more. its the wonder of how exactly your best friend makes his move on women that leads you to be so close to him, chests practically touching. breaths intertwining as atsumu stares a kind of serious into you that you’ve never been in the receiving end of before.
“im gonna touch ya.” his voice is low and your heart beats erratically in your chest. you nod.
lifting his right hand, cold fingertips run across the heated skin on the back of your arm. digits trailing upward as he paints a pathway up. and it’s nothing—just his hand on your arm, nothing new or different, and yet your breath hitches. innocent in theory, but something solidifies on atsumu’s face, the familiar signs of determination playing out on his face. it’s less babied now, more formed and angular with the growings of an adult man, but it’s the same focus in his eye, the same clench in his jaw.
his fingers trail up then down, repeating a circular figure on your skin. the sounds of your mingling breaths the only whispers between you two. your eyes dart down to his lips, but his stay fixed on you. studying every flicker of your eye, every inhale.
his fingers break from their pattern and trails down to your wrist, then your palm, then your own fingers. tracing them, dancing with them, intertwining them slightly only to pull them away.
“we should stop.” you whisper after a moment of his caress.
“why?” he asks and a quick glance to his gaze reveals that he knows why. he’s just making you spell it out.
it’s unfortunate that the only reason you want to stop is out of principle, and not because you truly have any reservations about any of this. your boyfriend of three months all but an annoying buzz in your ear.
“this feels like cheating.” you tell him simply. atsumu cocks his head to the side, charming smirk pulling across his lips.
“i’m touching yer arm. this isn’t anything, yet.”
“you shouldn’t be touching my arm like this.”
“why? cause it’s working, right?” his voice drops to a low rumble, words vibrating through you and shooting straight to your core. “see how easy it is?”
“that means this is cheating then, right?” the question is posed, but it’s obvious it’s more to convince yourself than him. because all that he’s done is touch your arm and you’ve felt the bubbling of that unnamed something heat within you. it feels the exact same as it did seven years ago when you met him; feels identical to the moment four years ago when a drunken night led to a drunken kiss that was forgotten about the next day; feels the exact same whenever he looks at you like he does now, like you're open for the taking. a pointedly very different response to the dread that comes when getting intimate with your actual boyfriend.
and while atsumu may be doing this to prove a point, to rub it in your face that he was right and you were wrong, you don’t trust that you’ll be able to not carry this with you. to not want more than you should.
“nah.” he says simply, knowingly. “if i kiss you then it’s a problem.”
“oh, so kissing is cheating, but fingering isn’t?”
“can you shuddup? always runnin’ that damn mouth.” he renders you quiet.
satisfied with your silence, he brings his left hand to cup your jaw, thumb and index finger grasping your chin and tilting your head to the left, leaving your neck exposed. he leans in, nose tracing a line up the column of your neck until he meets the juncture between that and your jaw. it’s a simple movement, and yet it feels like eternity in his hands. his breath hits steadily against the expanse of your cheek as he whispers into your ear. “does he touch ya like this?”
the gasp you release is guttural.
the arm previously fiddling with your fingers quickly wraps around your waist, pulling you flush to him. you have no choice but to embrace him with your own arms, hands cupping the back of his neck to steady yourself. it’s impulse to run them down the expanse of his back, to feel the muscles that he’s worked so hard for, but you resist. keeping yourself locked on his neck and nothing more, as though you being pliant to his ministrations wasn’t jeopardizing enough.
his thumb inches upward, stroking the corner of your lips sweetly. “does he take his time with ya? cause i would.”
its then that his lips meet the skin of your neck, tingles erupting from the connection. all of its effects causing an inadvertent clench within you. “it’s not about shoving fingers inside and just doing it. its about doing it the way you like it. and i’d make ya tell me how ya like it. since yer always runnin’ that damn mouth, might as well put it to good use.”
its all-encompassing, the traitorous burn between your thighs. and yet, this is the unnamed something, all that you’ve pushed away.
“astumu—” you whine and its in that exhale of yours that he releases a sigh of his own. one that almost sounds restrained.
“tell me to stop.” he says quickly, lips mouthing against your neck as he utters the words.
and you don’t want him to. not really. the desire is feverish, unlike anything you’ve felt before and to end this is to end the sweetness of something you’ve yet to taste. if it were to be with anyone you would want it to be with him.
you could take the teasing, the “i-told-you-so” from osamu, the obliteration of a friendship for the uncertain promise of something more. but it isn’t right. not like this. if mountains were to come to a head, you want it to happen because they were gravitated to each other, not because the earth told them to do so.
“stop.” you tell him, and it’s like a hot brand that strikes him. he’s immediately pushing away from, untangling his limbs from you and stepping back into the swath of darkness in the room.
his breaths are deep and heavy, that much you can tell from the distance. shuttering exhales that wrack his chest. you can hardly make out his irises, only see the intensity of dark pupils. it’s hard to believe that he could be feeling the way you do, just from the simple touch alone. a quick glance down to his grey sweatpants proves otherwise.
a moment, then two, pass by. ragged breaths filling the distance, words spoken in the silent language you’re both fluent in.
“does this mean i’m easy then?” you ask quietly, an effort to ease the wall of tension.
“no.” he shakes his head gently, “just means i know ya.”
he knows what he means to say, the words and all of their yearning practically knocking against his teeth to escape. it’s the long haul, almost a decade long game of carefully advanced chess pieces to get to this point. blocked, temporarily, by the appearance of the new guy. a boyfriend of yours that atsumu met once, a guy he barely attempted to learn the name of. for reasons of his own, their knowing pertinent only to him. held deeply within the urges of being seen, the desires of having you wholly, completely.
there are plenty of other ways that he could do this—probably be more eloquent about it. admit pushed away feelings when you’re not in the midst of ranting about how your boyfriend just can’t get you off.
but the tension irks him. thick enough to cut a knife, always following the two of you in the long held stares and closeness in which you two gravitate towards each other. the answer to your boyfriend problem is standing right in front of you. he knows what he wants you to do when you see your boyfriend later tonight.
there are certain shoes that atsumu is convinced he could fill better than your boyfriend.
your face is flushed, and the desk lamp makes you look angelic under the lowlights, and you're wearing his jacket like you always do in a way that makes him believe it was always meant for you. and he’s not entirely convinced, even without the cloud of lust that hangs over him, that you don’t want this just as bad as he does.
osamu once said that atsumu wouldn’t admit his feelings to you even if they hit him over the head. they’re here, now. settling in the distance between you two, bobbing in the capsizing waves of want. they ache to be spoken, knock repeatedly against his gritted teeth.
but a choice is made in that moment, with you looking at him as wild as you are. atsumu will admit to the selfish and prideful part of himself, but this—you— aren’t something to just take. the taste of your neck, the feel of your body against him, it must be given to him, earned. not because he needs to make a petty point, but because you want him to.
he cares for you too much to be reckless in how he plays his cards. even if osamu will bust his balls for it later.
you have a boyfriend. and he can’t force you to change that. it wouldn’t be right, he’s given you the taste, he hopes it will be enough.
“like that.” he says after a moment, pushing down his pride and long held desires for you. “tell him ya like it like that.”
a/n: why is it that whenever i stop writing for kuroo, the one i always want to write for is atsumu. also big ups for my beta who entertains me and proofreads me at all hours of the day. i love you sanju!!!!!!
#miya atsumu x reader#atsumu x reader#atsumu miya x reader#hq x reader#haikyuu x reader#atsumu#atsumu fic#i love a best friends trope wtf#also i promise i was writing my boss kuroo fic and then i heard this song and was derailed for THREE DAYS#BIG THANK YOU BY THE WAY TO MY BETA
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COLD STEEL
the shadowsinger and the traitor .ˊˎ 🗡️
Azriel x Fem! Reader
Words: 2,674
Warnings: takes place in acowar so it may contain SPOILERS from previous books, archeron sister reader, use of a dagger, reader is tied up, angst, betrayal, no use of y/n, mating bond, fluff, images above do not depict reader’s appearance it’s just for aesthetic and I think that’s it
Summary: When your real intentions are discovered by the Inner Circle of the Night Court, you have to face the consequences. Your mate and the cold steel of Truth Teller.
A/N: friendly reminder that english isn’t my first language so please feel free to correct me <3 this is my first one shot for acotar so of course it had to be about azriel
Masterlist
•••
Gods, how did you end up in this situation? Wrists tied behind your back and a rope that served as a muzzle inside your mouth to prevent yourself from making any sound… Any sound that could mess up with your mate's closed-up mind.
No. You knew exactly why you were there. It was all your fault and because of what? A blinding desire for revenge? Or perhaps it was childish behavior that had made you reach out to the wrong person?
But you were young. Immature. Compared to all those creatures you had sworn once in your life to hate and that now your sister considered a family. They were centuries old, you were just turned twenty-one when it happened.
Twenty-one before your mortality had been taken away from you, in front of your eyes, while you were slowly sunk inside that turbid water of what they had called "The Caldroun"... A powerful source of magic, creator of the world known and theft of yours and your sisters' mortality.
But as theft, as The Cauldron was, it was also generous. So it gifted powerful abilities that seemed to differ from others in that magical end of The Wall.
As a mortal, your impulsivity sometimes took a thick control over your logical sense. And when you were turned High Fae, that only increased. The process of adaptation was hard. You could hear, see, and feel everything. Everything you had ignored before. And the desperation of not knowing how to stop it made you act.
And the King of Hybern was the only solution.
Or so you thought, less than a year as an immortal and you had already made your biggest mistake. He promised he would help you with the emerging powers. You believed him. He swore that if you desired it, he would return your mortality. You believed him. He convinced you it was all Feyre's fault. You believed him.
And the only requirement? You would become his spy. All you had to do was watch and tell. And you stupidly agreed.
Easy job. You already hated all of them... It was their fault you had ended up being swallowed by the Cauldron and resurfaced as one of them. You just had to do as the King said, keep Nesta and Elain protected until the King would turn the three of you mortal again, and then... Then you would figure it out. It was easy, right?
It was easy knowing that you were working with the male who plotted to kill the sister who had saved you from starvation. Even easier witnessing the love they shared, the love of a family... A family bonded by the drawbacks of time and the burdens they had fought together.
Gods...
And it was even easier to betray the male who had silently been by your side, wanting to help and protect you without being invasive. His quiet and cold presence was even more reassuring than a gentle caress or a hug and before you realized, you desired to spend more time with him... Not only in silence.
When the bond snapped, it wasn't a surprise but a relief for Azriel to be able to call you his mate... On the other hand, for you, it was what changed everything.
You were trapped, being suffocated by the feeling of betrayal and consternation. And every time you slept by his side when you were in the comfort of being surrounded by him and him only, silent tears escaped your eyes.
Said eyes widened slightly when he entered the stance where you had been tied up. Azriel was silent, but not his usual comforting silence. The male that looked at you now was someone completely different from the male that held you through the nights, wings wrapped around your body to shield you from any harm.
Your eyes moved lower to his scarred hands, eyes closing tightly as you noticed that Azriel was gripping Truth Teller. The dagger's blade caught the only traces of light that filtered through the darkness of the room and your throat closed as the tears began to pool in your closed eyes, dropping down your cheeks into the muzzle.
Azriel didn't say a word as he approached you. He didn't even flinch when he saw your tears as he usually did every time you cried in front of him. No, he just moved to free you from the muzzle around your lips.
He was determined to make you talk. Your mate seemed willing to torture you until he got any valuable information out of you... Or, at least, an explanation.
Your heart ached at the thought and unconsciously your pain traveled through the bond making Azriel's breath hitch before he shook his head.
‘Azriel...’ You mumbled beggingly, your voice sounding strained with emotion. But not because of the muzzle, the rope around your wrists, or the thought of being tortured... Those were the least of your concerns as you observed the male before you.
He didn't answer. ‘Azriel, please...’ You tried again and he looked into your eyes, no emotions visible in his hazel irises. Almost as if he had shut them down. A sob escaped your lips. ‘Please, please... Just—’
Azriel interrupted you. ‘You are not going to trick me anymore.’
The coldness in his words made you fight against the ropes that were wrapped around your wrists. ‘I didn't—!’ Lie. You did trick everyone into thinking you were harmless. ‘Please, Azriel... I swear I—’
‘Were you forcefully compelled to work with Hybern?’
‘No, but—’
His firm voice interrupted you before you could try to justify yourself. ‘Did you not spy on us... On me and shared that information with Hybern?’
‘Azriel, please—’
‘Were you not condemning us to a certain death by sharing that information?’
A sob escaped your lips and you couldn't hold his gaze anymore, looking down at the ground before yelping when his scarred hands roughly held your chin and forced you to look at him. His fingers squeezing your cheeks.
‘Were you not condemning me to death?’ Azriel asked again.
‘I didn't know what else to do.’ You mumbled and then the cold steel of Truth Teller pressed against your trembling throat. Holding back the need to sob, your gaze locked with his.
‘And betraying your family and your mate was the best option?’
‘The bond hadn't snapped when I...’ Azriel pressed the blade closer to your throat but despite his threat, you noticed he was being gentle... The blade was raised upwards to prevent it from slicing your throat and even if he was gripping it tightly, the pressure against your neck was minimal.
You looked behind him and noticed how his own shadows were trying to move him away from you. The dark tendrils were trying to protect you.
‘Look. At. Me.’ He spoke coldly, fingers squeezing your cheeks again. ‘You still betrayed your sisters... And then betrayed me when you kept going.’
‘What did you expect me to do? To suddenly cut connections with Hybern? Yeah, that probably wouldn't raise suspicions, Azriel.’ You managed to mumble, a small frown of frustration over your features as you looked at him through the blur of your tear-filled eyes.
He held his breath as he analyzed you, his eyes scanning the tears that stained your cheeks and how your brows furrowed together. ‘You could have told me.’
‘And then what? The same damn situation we're dealing with now.’ His fingers around your chin squeezed tightly pulling you forward to him. His nose brushed against yours as breaths mingled together. Gods, his turmoil was so tangible that you could smell the inner fight he was struggling with.
He breathed in your scent. ‘I would have helped you... I would have understood you.’
‘Are you understanding me? Are you helping me?’
Azriel called your name in frustration before he roughly shoved your head back. Desperately needing to create some distance between you, he held your chin so that you couldn't lean in closer. ‘Don't say that as if that's not the only thing I long for. Help you, protect you, shield you.’
Hearing the desperation in his voice had you holding your breath. The guilt invades your lungs in a choking sensation instead of the so-desired oxygen. But that's what you deserved, after everything.
‘I...’ Your strained voice broke the silence as you finally looked into his eyes. ‘I just wanted my mortality back, Azriel...’ He sighed shakily before his hand holding Truth Teller moved down. ‘Everything's been so...’ Your voice broke and his other hand moved up to cup your cheek.
‘I know, I know...’ He mumbled and his eyes met you, the same warmth in which he usually held your gaze.
‘I didn't know what else to do... I was so furious with Feyre and I—... I just thought about bringing our mortality back.’ You admitted referring to your sisters before Azriel shushed you, the hand holding Truth Tuller moving down to cut the ropes that held your shoulders to the pole so that at least you could rest your weight against him. However, he kept the ropes around your wrists and legs.
When your head gently hit his shoulder resting against him, his hand moved up to cup the back of your head. Whispering sweet words to reassure you as he held you in his arms, trying to silence your tears as he brushed his lips along your temple.
‘If I could go back, I swear I'll do it... I—’ You trailed off when he began massaging your scalp bringing a sense of calm to your trembling body. ‘Ever since the bond snapped, I've been giving him confusing information. Half-lies... Or entirely nothing. I swear...’
‘I know, baby, I know.’
His words made you nuzzle your nose more against his shoulder. ‘Please, you have to believe me... Please.’
His hand over your cheek pulled you back so you could look into his hazel eyes. Gods, those irises... You could sink into them and get lost in that pool of golden brown. And you would do it willingly. They were your anchor. He was your anchor. Your strength and your liability, both at the same time.
‘I believe you.’ Azriel assured you. Then, the strength of your bond hit you so hard that it caught your breath away. The golden thread looked tangible as it swirled as a bridge between your souls and there you could feel his honesty and concern.
‘I don't know what to do.’ You confessed in a shaky whisper and he rested his forehead against yours. ‘Gods, please hate me. It's way easier than this... Hate me, Az...’ You begged him.
Azriel shook his head before his lips pressed a gentle kiss against your forehead. Rejoicing the feeling, a soft sigh escaped your lips. ‘I don't hate you. I could never hate you.’
‘You should.’
‘I don't want to,’ Azriel repeated before he gently called your name. The word rolled off his tongue with a soothing tone to it. ‘I don't hate you, baby... And neither does Feyre, nor either of the others.’
When a small sob escaped your lips, his dagger swiftly cut the rope that held your arms and wrists and you were able to wrap your arms around him in a tight embrace.
Finally.
Your torso was pressed against his, the soft flesh in your body caressing the hardness of the centuries-trained muscles over his chest and abdomen. Azriel immediately encircled your waist. He needed this. To feel you closer. To know you weren't a threat.
‘No one hates you.’ He assured you gently ‘Elain... She saw your intentions through one of her... Visions,’ Azriel's face contorted into discomfort at the thought of your younger sister having such a powerful ability that she didn't know how to control ‘She defended you and I... I wanted to see it for myself, see that you... That you at least had some regret.’
He loathed the thought of what he had planned to do before entering that room.
‘I wanted to torture you until you would give me something... Anything.’ Azriel admitted and you felt his pain and self-hatred through the bond. ‘But I... Seeing you like this, I can't— I don't...’ His grip on you tightened.
‘Azriel...’ You mumbled but he interrupted you.
‘I know you regret it.’ The Shadowsinger mumbled and his dark tendrils roamed down to free you from the rope around your legs. The minute you were free you wrapped one leg around him bringing the male closer to you. ‘Now I see it.’
You two fell into a comfortable silence. He brought you comfort and so did you to him. It was as simple as that.
‘If I hadn't felt any regret...’ You began gently only stopping for a second when the male growled. His chest vibrated roughly, so you placed one hand over the hard tattooed flesh. ‘Would you have done it? Torture me?’
The Ilyrian male froze under the weight of your question. Was that what you believed of him? Did you think he would do you any harm? The mere idea made Azriel want to go through every single torture himself.
‘No.’ He spoke firmly and his eyes met yours again when he pulled away. ‘No. Never...’ Azriel shook his head and then it seemed as if something broke inside him. ‘Never... never...’
He repeated over and over again as he slowly closed the distance between your lips. Lazily, his lips crashed against yours tasting the saltiness of your lips. ‘Never...’ He repeated over your lips. ‘Don't ever suggest it again.’ Azriel mumbled with pain.
His hand moved up to tangle around your hair as he kissed you again, this time it was messier... The male was shaking as he captured your lips with his and he gently pulled away when you choked one of your sobs against his mouth, more tears silently falling and making the kiss even messier if it was possible. A small frown adorned his face as he pulled you closer by the waist after backing away.
‘What can I do?’ You asked, voice strained and tears falling down your cheek until they would wet the dark fabric of his shirt. ‘Please, Azriel, what can I do to amend it?’
His sigh was warm against the skin of your neck and his lips pressed a gentle kiss against the sensitive skin provoking a shiver that ran down your spine. ‘Nothing. You don't need to do anything...’
‘I do.’ You insisted and he shook his head, burying his nose even more into the crook of your neck.
‘You don't.’
‘Azriel...’
‘I... Cassian may have said something earlier that could not be a terrible idea.’ Azriel mumbled against your skin before he moved backward to look into your eyes and seeing your raised brow he sighed. ‘But I don't want you to get in danger just to...’
‘Just to make it up for you? Enough reason.’ You whispered, chin tilted backward to brush your lips against his. ‘I am capable of making my own decisions, Azriel.’
His small grin widened as he answered, ‘I know that,’ when your lips pressed against his in small, gentle pecks. Yet, he couldn't help but keep talking. ‘This shouldn't be allowed… You're compelling me with your kisses.’
‘Am I now? What a shame... Poor Spymaster can't handle some kisses?’
The moment he confessed, ‘Not when they're yours,’ you couldn't help but stifle a giggle. You paused your kisses and instead nestled your nose against his, savoring the intimacy of the moment.
‘Please, Azriel... Just tell me what I can do.’
He groaned under his breath when your presence clouded his thoughts. ‘Cassian mentioned that you could gather information for us… Misinform Hybern and extract intel from him.’
Your brow raised with interest.
‘Perhaps I could teach you the art of espionage, my mate... Be one of my spies… What do you think?’ Azriel mused, his gaze penetrating as he locked his gaze with yours.
Oh, how the tables had turned on Hybern.
#acotar#acotar x reader#azriel#azriel x reader#azriel x you#azriel x female!reader#requests open#azriel acotar#acotar x you#a court of thorns and roses#azriel fic#acotar fic#cassian#batboys#rhysand#feyre#archeron sisters
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Day 2 of ARCANEWEEN
Prompt: FANGS AND CLAWS
Characters: Young Silco, Young Vander, Reader
Relationship: Young Silco x Reader
Timeline: Pre-Arcane
Words: 3923
Warnings: None
Sharing an apartment with Silco and Vander was not the worst idea you’ve ever had. Silco usually cooked for the three of you, while Vander took care of most of the cleaning up. Not to mention the price of living with two others. It was always split and eventually you could save up some of your money to buy some things for yourself. That came at the cost of two of you working two jobs at the same time. Vander and you had both worked hard to keep up this state of living, while Silco handled the finances at home.
But life wasn’t always easy with them either. They bickered like brothers on most days, and quite honestly it could truly get under your skin. Just this day you were lying on the couch, a book in your hand, and enjoying your leisure time before you had to get to your second job. The apartment wasn’t big, so the kitchen and the living room were opened into each other to give space to the two bedrooms and one bathroom. Which is why you heard Silco and Vander’s bickering loud and clear as they were making dinner.
“Come on, it would be fun!” Vander nagged the boy for the one hundredth time.
“More like humiliating.” Silco scoffed at him. “I’m not dressing up to your stupid Halloween party.”
“I already bought your costume!” he whined.
You sighed to yourself before closing the book. With raised brows you turned your head to the boys. Silco waved a spatula in his hand while talking to Vander, who was wearing an apron. Sometimes they looked like an old married couple who couldn’t decide if they still loved each other or wanted to poison the other one’s drink.
“What are you two arguing about again?” you yawned. “Some of us would like to rest, you know.”
“Tell that to Silco!” Vander turned around.
“Why is this my fault?” Silco whipped around as well. “This knucklehead wants me to wear a cat costume to his boss’ Halloween party!”
You burst out laughing at the image of Silco wearing a tail and cat ears. The bar - The Last Drop - Vander worked at organized a whole party for tomorrow night and everyone attending must be wearing some sort of costume. You have been invited as well but sadly you couldn’t go, as you had to work that night.
“No, no, I wanna see that.” you managed to say.
“Well, I wanted to get three matching costumes but since you can’t come I can only match with Silco.” Vander crossed his arms.
“So if he is a cat will you be… a mouse?” you smirked.
Silco snickered under his nose, before turning back to the food they were making. The taller boy sent him a death stare before rushing to his room. You were left alone with Silco, who gently turned off the stove. Before you could go over to him to help with the food though, Vander burst from their shared bedroom with ears clipped to his hair and a short tail tucked into his pants.
“Woof.” he said with the most serious tone ever.
You and Silco stared at him for a moment before you both started to holler at how stupid he looked. Vander scoffed at your reaction, especially when you fell off the couch and continued to scream on the floor. Silco wasn’t in a much better position either, as he sat on the floor and each time he looked at the other boy, he just started laughing louder and louder.
“This isn’t funny!” Vander finally screamed at the both of you.
“Woof.” Silco wheezed. “He said woof!”
“I can’t… breathe.” you said while coughing from all the laughing.
“I fucking hate you.” He walked back to his room.
You and Silco were left alone again. After the laughing died down and you were able to stand up, you walked over to the stove and helped Silco make portions for you all. Vander soon joined you and the dinner began. After dinner, you helped Vander wash the dishes because Silco had gone to sleep early, as he had to go to the mines earlier tomorrow morning to be able to attend Vander’s party.
“Are you sure you can’t come?” the boy next to you whispered as he washed another plate.
“Nah, you know I can’t leave my job.” you sighed.
“I wish you could come.” he shook his head. “Silco really wanted to drink with you too.”
“Did he say that or are you trying to make me feel bad?” you smiled at him.
Vander chuckled. “Guilty.”
You shook your head at the boy. “I’ll see if I can get there before the party is over. But I won’t promise anything.”
“If you manage to come, you could wear the cat costume.” he shrugged.
“Vander.” you sighed. “Hell no.”
“It’s a good costume!”
That morning, right after your night shift, you went to sleep a little disappointed that you can’t spend the night with your favorite boys. As much as they could annoy you, they were the closest friends you ever made. Silco was your first friend ever, in fact. But your relationship with him was more complicated than that. You never missed the shared glances, the subtle but intimate touches and the flirty banter between you two. Alas, Silco wasn’t the type of person who wanted anything serious, and you weren’t going to ruin your friendship with your feelings, so everything between you two was left unsaid. Before you could overthink it more though, you drifted off to sleep.
You woke up sometime in the afternoon, two hours before you had to go to work. A loud crash rang through the apartment and you jumped out of your bed. It only took half a second and you were already out the door with a pocket knife in your hand, only to see Silco hunched over a broken plate to gather the pieces.
“Fuck’s sake Silco.” you sighed.
His attention turned to you. “Morning.”
Silco’s greeting only made your eyes roll as you walked over to the kitchen counter to see what you could eat before going to work. Sadly there wasn’t much left, which meant you would have to get some groceries soon. With a sigh, you went to open more cabinets. That was until you felt Silco gently press against your back. From behind you, he reached for the cabinet and opened it with those long arms of his.
“I can make some eggs for you.” he whispered against you.
You could feel your face heat up from the pressure against your back. But it didn’t last long, as Silco already stepped away to prepare your breakfast on the stove. You cleared your throat before speaking.
“Thanks.” you managed to say.
“Best I can do after I broke the plate.” he just shrugged without looking at you. “Should’ve been more careful.”
“It’s fine.” you shook your head. “I appreciate the compensation, though.”
He huffed a laugh as he broke the eggs into the pan. You all have been eating eggs for breakfast for two weeks now. It was better than nothing but you were slowly getting sick of it. Still, the memories of going to sleep without food in your childhood made you push those negative feelings away. At least you had food everyday. That’s nice.
“It's nothing.” Silco hummed.
You fell into silence as you watched him cook. His hair was put in a bun, as it so often was after work. There were still some smears of coal on his cheek that just emphasized his sunken face. No matter how much you have fed that boy, he stayed just as lean. Sometimes you wondered what he looked like under all that clothing. You have seen him naked before, but you were children back then. Since you both have reached puberty though, only the people Silco seeked out in the brothel have seen him naked. Speaking of which, that reminded you of a topic you wanted to discuss with Silco.
“I wanna find a partner.” you started. “Long term.”
Silco only looked at you from the corner of his eye.
“Why?” he asked.
“It’s just… stability, I guess.” you shrugged. “I know I have other things to worry about, but having a partner I could rely on sounds good, you know.”
“I don't think you should do it.” Silco looked away, his attention on the eggs again. “You have me and Vander anyway.”
You sighed. Of course Silco didn’t get it. In a better life, a better world, you would’ve chosen Silco. But finding truly romantic partners in Zaun was rare, which made it all the more intriguing. You also would’ve lied if you said the piltie romance books you’ve been reading lately didn’t have anything to do with your opinion.
“I know.” you nodded. “But it’s not the same! I want to go to sleep with someone on my side.”
“Pfff, I can go over to your room if you want that so much.” the boy shrugged.
“Silco, you’re not hearing me!” you groaned.
“All I’m saying is,” he fully turned to you, “that you can do all that shit with me and Vander.”
“Like kissing and sex?” you raised a brow sarcastically.
Silco’s face darkened with a hue of red before turning away from you. He just stared at the stove with furrowed brows, no doubt thinking what he could say next to change your mind. But you were faster than him.
“Maybe I could have my own place with my partner, and you could get your own room instead of sharing one with Vander.” you shrugged.
“And how do you think we would pay for this apartment without you?” Silco turned to you with anger in his eyes.
“Right, I didn’t think about that.” you nodded. “Well, I could bring them here.”
“Absolutely not.” he sounded offended. “I won’t live with someone I don’t know.”
“Well, you could meet them.” you raised a brow at his reaction.
He slammed his hands down on the counter. “Just why aren’t I enough for you? Or Vander?”
Your eyes widened at the desperation in his eyes. Silco never acted like this before. Even in the worst scenarios, he was the one with the brains who got your little group out of trouble. Were it not for his calmness in risky situations, all of you would be behind bars by now.
“It’s not that you aren’t enough for me, Silco.” you reached for his hand to calm him down. “You are the best thing that happened to me, and I will always cherish us.”
He squeezed your hand at those words. You felt like you finally understood what the problem was. Silco must’ve felt like you were replacing him with someone new, just because he couldn’t give you the romance you wished for.
“No one can come between us.” you shook your head. “If I had to choose between finding someone, or keeping you, I’ll always choose you, Silco.”
You offered him a smile and before you could react, he pulled you into a hug. As much as he tried to deny it, he was a sucker for physical affection. You hugged him back with a huff, rubbing his back.
“I know you want to have that perfect romance like in your books,” he whispered against your ear, “but it’s rare here. I’m saying all of this for your own sake.”
“I know, Sil.” you nodded.
After a few seconds passed, you broke the hug. With a smile, you reached for his face and gently caressed him. Silco softly sighed and closed his eyes while enjoying your affection. A thought crossed your mind - to kiss him. But that was quickly discarded when you remembered the eggs still left on the stove.
“The eggs will-” you started but couldn’t finish.
Silco’s eyes opened wide and he quickly turned around. “Shit!”
Thankfully he got the eggs off the stove just in time. Silco grabbed a plate and served you the eggs. You both sat down in the living room and Silco took his notebook out to calculate all that the household needed to spend in the upcoming weeks. He always tried to minimize the amount spent, so you and Vander just left this to him. That reminded you…
“Where’s Vander?” you asked between two bites.
Silco answered without looking up. “At the Drop.”
“Already?” you sighed. “He’s working too hard.”
He just hummed. Just from that, you knew he had something on his mind. Silco didn’t make eye contact, was playing with the pen in his hand and slowly bit away his lips. All of these were things he did when keeping a secret from you.
“Spit it out, Sil.” you groaned.
He finally looked up at you. “I’m quitting.”
You almost spit the eggs out. “What?”
“I got offered a job at The Last Drop to cover all the financial stuff.” he shrugged. “Payment is better and it’s less exhausting.”
You smiled at him. “I’m happy for you. Sounds like a way better job.”
“It is.” he nodded. “Thanks.”
After you ate your breakfast you got ready to leave the house. Silco wished you a good shift before you left, then went on to get ready for the Halloween party. Whereas you imagined the boys had a blast at the party tonight, you were stuck in a shop selling scraps and tools to all the lonely bastards who weren’t able to attend any parties. The customers had a way to make their bitterness known to you by all but spitting on you. So to put things simply, your shift was going horribly.
You were sitting behind the counter, playing with the lone coins in your hand. No one had stepped into the shop for about an hour now. And all your thoughts were on the Halloween party where all of your friends were currently. Vander, Silco, Benzo and all the others. You wished you could simply just leave, alas it wasn’t much of an option. Your shift still lasted for hours. If you ran fast enough though, you might be able to catch the end of the party.
After about another half hour went by, your boss appeared in the shop. His graying hair all but glowed under the neon lights of the Undercity. With a cough, he walked inside and closed the door behind him. The old man greeted you with a wave, as he walked over to the counter. You raised a brow at him, surprised to see him in the shop so late. Usually he would leave the keys with you and leave at the beginning of the shift.
“Did you forget something?” you asked on instinct.
“Just because I’m old my memory isn’t shit.” he waved his hand dismissively.
“Then what-”
“One of your friends was practically begging on his knees in front of my door to let you go tonight.” he huffed a laugh. “Slim boy he was, yes.”
“Silco?” you wondered out loud.
He shrugged. “Didn’t catch his name. He asked for you to go to a party, though.”
“Oh, yeah.” you nodded. “My roommate's boss is making one and I was invited.”
“Well, go then!” he tried to push you away from the counter.
“Really?” your eyes widened, standing up to leave.
“Before I change my mind!”
“Thank you so much!”
You all but ran out of the shop. The old man grumbled something under his nose but you were in too much of a rush to catch any of his words. Not many people were on the streets that night, but you still managed to bump into a few as you rushed to your apartment. It didn’t take a lot of time to get home, as the shop was pretty close to it, but you still coughed like crazy after all that running - a byproduct of living in constant toxic air. You dropped your keys before you could open the door so you cursed under your breath before you practically broke into your apartment.
No one was inside, just as you expected. What surprised you however, was the little note placed on the cat costume. In Silco’s handwriting you read “For tonight”. You sighed, shaking your head at the boy. Clearly he had been planning this, and you wondered whether or not Vander was in on it too. Though, their argument seemed genuine so you supposed he was just a victim of Silco’s scheming as well.
Without a spare costume, you had to comply with Silco's wishes, and put on the cat ears and tail. It looked utterly ridiculous on you, probably because it was made out of very cheap material. But there was no other thing you could wear, so you left the house in this. The Drop wasn’t too far away from the apartment either, albeit it was in the other direction. It took about the same amount of time to get to it like it took to walk to the shop.
Once there, you opened the heavy doors of the bar, only to be met with unusual neon lighting inside. Usually it was warm and welcoming, but now mostly younger folks partied to loud music. You walked inside trying to find a familiar face. Vander was behind the counter, serving drinks to everyone. He looked comical with the dog ears on, but he seemed to enjoy it so you weren’t going to judge him.
“I wasn’t aware the bar accepted strays.” a familiar voice came from behind you.
You turned around with a smile, only to be met with Silco dressed fancily, with ruffles on his shirt and a swept back hair. As he smirked at you, fake fangs became visible, that were attached to his teeth.
“And what are you dressed as?” you laughed at him. “A leech?”
He rolled his eyes. “So your boss really let you go.”
“Well, after someone begged him for it.” you walked over to him and booped his nose. “Thank you, Sil.”
Silco smiled, before he looked down on what you were wearing. That’s when he noticed you were wearing his oversized sweater.
“And wouldn’t you see.” he groaned. “I believe that’s mine, sweetheart.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” you quipped back.
“Oh, you absolutely-”
Before he could finish it, you made a run for it. There were enough people around you to blend into the crowd, and Silco’s voice started to fade. You giggled to yourself as you turned to a corridor just behind the stairs. Most people didn’t know how to navigate through this place, but you, Silco and Vander did. That’s why you knew you would have some alone time with him.
It didn’t take long for Silco to catch up to you and when he did, he pinned you against the wall. His grip was loose and if you wanted to, you could easily escape. Silco wanted to seem serious but he simply couldn’t help but smile when he heard you giggle at his antics.
“You got me.” you grinned.
“Fantastic observation.” he whispered.
“If I were you, I would look out for my claws.” with delicate movement, you scratched Silco’s hand.
“Oh no, I’m so scared.” Silco huffed a laugh. “All I wanted was to talk, and you attacked me like this.”
“Oopsie.” you shrugged. “Tell me what ails your heart, my dear vampire.”
He shook his head at your dramatic tone. “I’ve been thinking about what you said to me earlier. About a partner.”
Silco looked at you with half lidded eyes, his face inching closer as he spoke. You could feel the heat rise to your face but you didn’t let your emotions show.
“Really?” you asked.
“Mhm,” he nodded, “and I came to realize I also feel like such.”
Your heart sank for a moment. “And you have your eyes set on someone?”
It wouldn’t be too far of a stretch, after all Silco was dressed especially nicely. You weren’t even sure where he got these clothes from. The most likely answer was that he stole it from a piltie’s closet, but you still couldn’t imagine how he would’ve possibly come to know of such clothing. And it definitely wasn’t in his closet before either, you would know since you always go through both his and Vander’s stuff when your clothes aren’t clean and you don’t feel like washing them.
“I have, in fact.” he looked deeply into your eyes. “And I don’t plan to share that person with anyone else.”
“Aren’t they just the luckiest?” you chuckled.
Silco hummed as his gaze slowly traveled to your lips. All signs pointed to you. The way he acted, how he spoke, the fact that he dressed up nice; it all seemed like he wanted you. And this closeness just proved even further. You wanted him just as much.
“Well, why don’t you take your first bite then, fangs?” you whispered.
Silco’s eyes widened for just a second before leaning in. He stopped just before he could reach your lips and traveled down to your jaw. You could feel his lips press against it for a moment. Then you felt him fully at your neck. He started biting and sucking it greedily, like anyone would steal you from him. You ripped one of your hands from his grasp and grabbed his hair to hold into as Silco pressed against you. He groaned when your hand pulled on his hair and started sucking on your neck even stronger. You gulped at the sensation.
Before he could draw blood, he left your neck and came face to face with you again. His breath softly hitched as you firmly pressed your lips against his. Then he made a noise you could die for - he moaned into the kiss. That alone sent a shiver down your spine. However, this wasn’t the place for anything more than a kiss, so you soon broke it. You two were panting against each other as he planted a gentle kiss on your lips once more before fully pulling away.
“I’ve wanted this for so long.” he sighed.
“So have I.” you gently caressed his face. “I never want to leave your side again.”
He grinned at that. “That’s something I could definitely get used to.”
Silco grabbed your hand and started dragging you upstairs. You yelped at the sudden force but went with him anyway.
“Come on, I have to show you off to everyone.” he looked back at you with a grin.
“Wait.” you stopped him for just a moment.
His enthusiasm broke for a second, but he still listened to what you had to say.
“I love you, Sil.” you finally confessed what you’ve been holding in.
Silco’s eyes widened, and he opened his mouth to say something back. But no words came. It was okay, you knew how hard admitting his feelings were to him, and you weren’t going to push him past his limits.
“You don’t have to say it back.” you smiled. “Just being with you is enough.”
He sighed and pulled you in for a kiss. It was much more gentle than the previous one, and once he pulled away, he inched to your ear.
“I love you too.”
It was a whisper so quiet not one person could ever hear it besides you. Silco’s love wasn’t meant for anyone but you, and that made you the happiest person in the world.
#no use of y/n#arcane#silco#silco x reader#young silco#young silco x reader#silco fanfiction#silco oneshot#arcane oneshot#silco league of legends#arcane x reader#silco x you#young silco x you#im incredibly late with this one but oh well#i also wont do the other days because my inspiration is about at zero
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