#if i don't answer immediately i hate you

[i-have-insane-that-i-am-paper]

Okay. News flash.

Just because I don't answer in five damin seconds you send me msg it doesn't mean I hate you/don't like you.

People who talk to me know that I'm usually pretty fast in responding, but guess what?

I have my own life too. I have shit I need to take care of.

I'm not constantly by my phone waiting for someone to message me.

I will answer first chance I get.

And I am sorry.

But it is far more disrespectful to me if you aren't giving me your full attention when I'm talking, than if I wait for a few hours and then talk to you when you are free.

I never want to hurt someone I care about with my lack of interest in what they are saying.

I may have, but it never was my intention.

So yes.

I won't answer to you if I'm doing something because I have enough of respect for you to make sure you have my full undivided attention when speaking to me, and I have enough of respect for myself to make sure you know the boundaries.

[necrotic-nephilim]

there is not enough femslash in batcest circles. the girls deserve to be just as weird about each other as the boys are. if BruDick gets to be weird father/son/brothers/lovers/friends/rivals/soulmates then it is only fair that Babs/Cass get to be mother/daughter/sisters/lovers too. Something about that deep intrinsic but undefinable love that is born out of trauma, especially if you consider Cass not knowing what healthy love looks like in the first place. i think it's fun and deserves just as much fandom content.

besides that, you can get even more niche with rarepairs like Helena/Steph. Huntress/Spoiler: Blunt Trauma is already a fantastic comic and even though it's their only real canon interaction it has so much potential. very comparable to TimJay in how Helena tries to get Steph to understand her morals and the corruption you could play with it.

batman: huntress/spoiler: blunt trauma (1998)

that comic also highlights on how both Steph and Helena are outcasts of the Batfamily and don't have the approval of Bruce to be doing what they do in "his city". I think there's so much Potential in Helena taking Steph under her wing because Bruce won't let her in and it becomes a weird codependent toxic sapphic mess. I think the protectiveness Helena feels over Steph from the get-go is so clear and the way she wants to look out for Steph, wants to make sure Steph understands the real world? I love them. Helena should be allowed to steal Steph, actually. I think it'd be fun.

there are a lot of other possibilities too like Babs/Steph or even getting weird with Helena Bertinelli/Helena Wayne and the existential question of "is it selfcest or not." But these two specifically live in my head rent-free, especially Helena/Steph and one day I'll convince everyone else to ship it too.

[livefromtheyard]

little personal secret of mine but these days i love lying and being like yeah idk i don't really post on tumblr anymore. mainly because my friends from high school who i don't want to talk to keep interacting with my main and i'm lying to them. but secretly i am on this sideblog almost every single day posting about these gay (derogatory) podcasters

[bumblingbabooshka]

Something about this interaction between Harry & Janeway - specifically Janeway but it's notable that Harry's the one listening because I think, say, Chakotay or B'Elanna might push back against the idolization of this 'it was different back in those days' way of thinking.

[jonathanbiers]

Argyle never gets frustrated with Steve when he doesn’t understand something. He doesn’t roll his eyes, or give That Sigh. He explains things patiently, if a bit abstractly, and when Steve is way off base Argyle runs with it. Is Vecna a vampire? Whoa that would be wild, man! Do you think he can’t have garlic? We could just take him out with a gnarly garlic pie, my dude!

the way you're seeing into my mind.... argyle being really soft with steve and taking the time to make sure he doesn't feel stupid when he's confused is something i've considered AT LENGTH (specifically in dms with @himbohohoharringtxn who has the unfortunate luck of being on the receiving end of Most of my argyle thoughts fdjghkdfj)

i would like to preface this by saying that i am firmly in "argyle and steve are both genuinely smart" territory. i think steve is very neurodivergent coded (i see the arguments for adhd/autism/dyslexia/ocd and as someone who might be autistic but is diagnosed with the other three....i see these arguments and i agree on all fronts) and there's also the head trauma of it all, though that's not what this is about. he's not fucking dumb, he just needs things broken down and explained to him in a very specific way. nothing wrong with that!

as far as argyle is concerned - we've literally seen him in action noticing small details no one else has(one of my fav parallels between them), which ends up being the reason the cali group finds nina and el. he's not fucking dumb either, just delivered to us as a comic relief stoner character with little dimension because the duffers need to be fucking stopped

BUT ANYWAY! you're so right! argyle would see the way steve sometimes gets brushed off and spoken over. the rest don't mean it to be hurtful and steve tries not to show that it does sometimes sting (because it's really not that big of a deal to him and it's not like they're being outright mean) but he would ABSOLUTELY "yes and-" whatever steve's off the wall question or idea was, if anything just to make him laugh, relieve some of the tension. AND IT WORKS is the thing.

it's not just, "duuuude, what if we just lure vecna into the sun? he'll be TOAST in five seconds flat, no fighting necessary. nancy, you can put the gun down, we're gonna hurl garlic cloves at him with a slingshot!" in one fell swoop, argyle is 1. making sure steve feels heard and not spoken over; 2. acknowledging steve's input and effort in a way that, let's be honest, the others don't do very often; 3. putting a smile on the group's faces for a while because fuck they're kids in a stressful situation and need a laugh; 4. putting himself in the line of fire so the others can rag on him instead.

argyle would do this when they aren't even dating yet and steve definitely would not be normal about it, he'd be smiling so big and soft and then argyle would catch his eye and smile back and they'd have this little quiet moment between them amidst all the chaos and dread.

after they're dating though? oh, they'd be INSUFFERABLE. they'd be such a pda couple, with the ridiculous pet names("what the fuck did you just call me?" "don't worry about it, my lil sweet potato pie."), and the open flirting until their friends are fake-retching, the whole nine yards. argyle is hanging off of steve's back with his arms around his waist and not even acknowledging it as he makes his argument to the rest of the group that, "no, no, listen. steve is onto something here, i just know. what if-"

and when they're alone, it'd be less of the theatrics and silliness and more of the gentle patience. they're both smart in really different ways and when argyle gets something steve doesn't and steve is getting a little frustrated about it, he'd take his hand or pull him close and just distract him with a little bit of affection to get him to cool down because he knows being frustrated isn't going to help steve figure out whatever it is. conversely, steve does the same when he's trying to explain something to argyle - though he's less likely to get as frustrated when confused, and more likely to pretend to take longer to get it than he actually does because listening to steve explain a subject he's knowledgeable about is fucking hot, can you blame him? they're just soft with each other, okay

[rottiens]

i truly hate when men

[batsplat]

This isn't the usual kind of ask you answer, but I've been working my way through the videopass archive sequentially and have been thinking about the historic/vintage livery that the teams are going to be using in Silverstone after the summer break quite a bit. Personally I'm very fond of the West Honda Pons' black and white livery especially with how they had the names of the riders on one side and the team name on the other, and obviously the gauloises and camel yamahas are iconic. But you've obviously watched a lot of the older seasons, so are there any liveries you'd like to see/which ones would you personally pick for the teams?

I too have been having thoughts about this! I do have some of my faves in a wee folder, and initially my picks were a bit limited in terms of range of years and teams. BUT let's do this properly. all eleven teams. my hot take for each and every one of them

CAVEAT NUMBER ONE look I don't know how 'design' or 'colour theory' or even 'taste' work. most of my reasoning doesn't extend beyond 'I thought this looks nice'

CAVEAT NUMBER TWO I also don't... quite know how this works in terms of who's allowed to use which livery? like not just the sponsor stuff, but would teams be able to use liveries from... idk, a different satellite outfit that was in the sport before they were? this ask mentions the pons liveries.... could honda teams actually use those? what if you don't have a lot of history? is anyone allowed to use mv agusta liveries? would teams go for special liveries, or just the regular ones? how strict are the rules for what you can use?

so. y'know. I'm really just guessing here what's even possible, which meant that for... uh. some of these teams. I did have to reach a bit to come up with a viable livery. let's just make clear this is all vibes and go from here

HONDA

they should have no problem with coming up with plenty of options. let's start with the west honda pons, which the ask references:

excellent pick, anon. if they can use this one, I'd very much support it! we're missing black bikes on the grid currently... this one's simple, it's classy, it's got a little bit of identity with the name written on the side. the dark red highlights work nicely. it's also a livery that, unlike some of the ones to follow, should still work well on the current bikes without losing its identity too much - though maybe you'd have to put some thought into how you'd place the actual name. should still be plenty of space though! and it'd be easily recognisable to fans who are familiar with the old livery, which I reckon is also an important metric

while we're on pons, shout out to the ducados honda pons livery:

nice shade of blue! nice design of the leathers! pleasing shape of the numbers! just has a lot of character and charm to it

anyhow, let's get to the factory honda team. the VERY first pick that popped into my head was the special livery for aragon 2011:

so I get that sense that plenty of people hate this livery and think it looks 'childish' and I'm sorry, but if you think that, congratulations on having bad taste. it's cute! honda barely ever has fun! look at how orange it is! look at the stars! there's a star on the leathers too! I'm fond of the way the front of the bike looks too, how the numbers are placed kinda messily on the star. this one's just, y'know, a bit more creative, something that's just different from how we usually expect liveries to look. screw classy and stylish, give me something with a bit of charm

moving back in time a little further, here's the valencia 2003 livery (valentino's last race with honda):

isn't she gorgeous?? I'd put that bike in my bedroom. lovely from every angle. if you look it up, you can find more photos to show it off properly - just see the sun on the top of the bike. really nice mix of the traditional repsol orange with the yellow, it all just works together. bright like the sun

and one more special livery from the early noughties (if not from the factory team), here's mugello 2001:

hardly a controversial choice, people love this one for a reason. it's pretty!! blue flowers!! this one should work reasonably well on the modern bikes too and obviously most fans should be able to recognise it. again, I don't know what the stance is on special liveries - but hey, it'd be fun to give a certain someone in your factory team a livery from this era

and going back further still, here's eddie lawson 1989:

yes, it's rothmann's honda, yes, I've decided not to care. this is my personal top pick for honda. it should be recognisable even on the current bikes, it pays tribute to honda's long history by not just sticking to something from this century, and it looks cool. clean cut colours that are nicely separated out - I really like the yellow highlights on either side of the bike, plus the way the separation of the blue and white is handled on both the bike and the leathers. it's all quite clearly demarcated, but with nice details to give it character - those stripes on the front of the bike and on the the leathers. the touches of gold. the rider's name on the side of the screen. the number on the back of the bike. cool bit of history, too, like they stole that man away from yamaha and it certainly worked out for them. it's fun!

and one more jump to the past to hailwood's late sixties honda:

this one is proper honda #heritage and I'd totally get if they go with that. my main issue is... I'm not quite sure how it'd work on today's bike, shape-wise? like, the charm here is really the simplicity, the way the orange-gold spreads over the silver. does that work if you have all the bits sticking out everywhere? maybe somebody with a better understanding of design than me can figure it out, and I do like this one. the numbers look nice. idk. it's neat

LCR

well. I guess you'd want to go with one of the cecchinello liveries here? my problem with lcr is that they seem to generally be pretty big on their retro liveries anyway - the first one I thought of... basically looks like the 2021 lcr livery anyway? boring! done that! then there's a few years that are like... silvery, but, and I know this is an unfair way to go about this, I kind of feel I've already gone silvery with a few of my other picks and they're all nicer. so, here's my pick from 2000:

it's a bit busy, but that's kinda the fun of some of these older liveries. big chunk of red, some blue, the nice bright yellow number, even all the logos are kinda fun... I like the weird shape of the white line that separates the red and the black. I don't know, it just works for me as a complete package in a way some of the other lcr liveries don't

YAMAHA

yes, gauloises yamaha. my beloved. everyone's a fan for a reason

can't not mention it!! I do think valentino's version specifically works the best because of the extra bit of flare the yellow highlights provide here. but also the GO!!!!!! thing works on every version. it's fun! sometimes it's okay to go overboard with exclamation mark numbers! this one kinda hits the sweet spot as being proper classy but also joyous, enthusiastic. just overall very much a vibe

on camel yamaha, I do like the livery, but personally I do just associate it more strongly with camel honda? which was literally the same livery. that might not have been the factory team, but those were still serious frontrunners during the early noughties... and, well, it just doesn't feel specifically yamaha to me idk

okay, I'm going to restrain myself here on the valentino livery front. yes, I too liked laguna and valencia 2005. I have only 30 images to play with here and I'm not going to blow half of them on valentino special liveries, so I'm going to stick to my two faves. assen 2007 and catalunya 2008:

they're just! fun! when it comes to liveries in general, my basic criteria are a) can I easily figure out who's riding them, and b) do they make me smile. elegance is boring, give me something more quirky and memorable and FUN. assen is just. a lot. lots of colours, such a bright and cheerful livery that still works as a complete package. the bike's fun, the livery's fun, fabio would look fantastic in this one. and catalunya (in honour of the italian national team) is just a cool idea! the football helmet! the mock shirts! the pink sleeves! there's a real creativity and charm to this one - and at the same time, the base design of the bike is actually really lovely and stylish. also I associated both of these liveries with extremely fun valentino races that I'd definitely recommend (literally two of the top six vale/casey duels), which... well you can't say that about the two 2005 liveries I mentioned above is what I'd say

now, I know I just said forget laguna 2005, but of course laguna 2005 was in itself a reference to a past yamaha livery. so cut out 2005 and just pay direct homage to the iconic late seventies design, feat kenny roberts:

another one everyone loves for a reason! it's a nice shade of yellow, it works well with the white and black... the black dashed line thingies are of course iconic and they just make the whole thing quite dynamic and snazzy

and one more. marlboro liveries do unfortunately slap, plenty of them are fan favourites... look at this red one, feat. eddie lawson 1984:

it's very. blocky. you've got the red bits the white bits the yellow bits. they have nice shapes. nice lines. the yellow bits where one's a circle type thingy and the other one's whatever you call that shape and then you've got the numbers on them. please don't read these descriptions. there's plenty of the marlboro liveries over the course of yamaha's time, but this one's my favourite. and it's the one I'd choose! I know it's super iconic but we already did a tribute to the 70s one back at laguna 2005. do this one instead! it's very yamaha but also a little more creative than the most obvious picks

DUCATI

well. if we're talking marlboro, then yes, of course the old marlboro ducati livery is very memorable:

this is a bike that looks good. there's not much more to say about it (or, well, there probably is, but again it should be obvious I don't know how design works). it's a nice shade of red, I really like how the front looks... my issue with this one is that low key it is the marlboro logo that makes it particularly distinctive. kinda feels against the spirit of the whole thing, damn those tobacco companies and their lovely bike designs

here's mugello 2006, which in itself is a retro livery. I'll allow this one and I do think it's just?? very nice??

really pleasing dull colours, three shades that work together well, got something old fashioned to it. my main problem with this one is... I don't feel like it'd look as good on the current bikes? I don't know, this one works because of the kind of... soft curves of the front of the bike. I do also think quirky and a bit in your face just suit the current bikes better than trying to keep things too classy?

my general problem is that ducati history in motogp is like... we're working with a limited sample size. and when I go through the options I do find them a bit. meh. the thing is, right, the red bikes are nice, I do like the marlboro design, but it's also still essentially a red bike. and if you translate these designs to the current bike shape, it's not going to look THAT different to the bike they're riding any other week. the mugello 2006 probably does better on that account, but I don't know. I think I am kind of committed to making them all actually switch around colours here

so I was wondering if maybe you could delve into the superbikes archive? you could go for the 2001 livery, feat. bayliss (also a motogp race winner):

I think the silver pairs quite nicely with the black leathers... also I like it whenever the bit on the front where they put the number on has a slightly quirky shape. I'm not going to pretend like this is my all time favourite livery, but I do like it well enough! it'd translate well to the current bikes, would give us a proper switch-up, works quite nicely imo

and one more from superbikes, this from 2012:

this one isn't happening for a bunch of reasons, not least because I doubt the effenbert team is one that's remembered particularly fondly by ducati. still, it passes the 'does it look distinctive' test to me, making a 'what if you threw a pint of beer over a motorcycle' livery is at the very least something different

PRAMAC

there's a few different ways you could go here, but I'd just keep it simple and go for one of the years where the pramac logo is big on one side of the bike. here's harada in 2002:

not a bad logo! you've got the arrows and everything! you've also got another more subtle silver arrow in the middle of all the white, makes the whole thing feel quite dynamic. simple colours, very pramac. bold and brash

(you could go for the 2018 mugello livery too but I philosophically reject having a 'retro' livery from 2018)

GRESINI

another satellite team that's been around for a while, and my suspicion is they'll go for one of fausto gresini's liveries. none of those... really appeal to me... so I wanted to suggest one from their telefonica movistar days back in the mid noughties. that's right: I'm talking sete's livery:

in practise, this livery does deeply annoy me in 2004 to 2005 because - despite not being in the same factories - you've somehow managed to get both title rivals in pretty damn similar liveries. like, can I tell them apart? sure. but especially with the poorer video quality, is it really necessary to make it this tricky? well! no! but also sete had this livery before his title rival switched to yamaha, so he came first. I like this one a lot! I like the way the yellow is integrated, the chequered bits around the telefonica movistar logo, good helmet too. slightly unusual patterns for the win - there's quite a lot going on with the lines on this design but it all kinda comes together. I actually think you could make this one look really good on the modern bikes, and it has a real spark and flare to it. also I would find it narratively pleasing if marc rides with sete's livery

but if gresini wants to go another way, shout out to their 2010 livery (several of the early 2010s look quite similar):

I'm not the biggest fan in the world of white liveries, but the style of this one pleases me idk. there's a slightly unusual shape on the side of this one, which I've already said I approve of. it's a nice shade of red to pair with the white. not my first pick, but I'd settle for this one

VR46

right, this is one where I really have questions. ... are they allowed to use just any of valentino's old liveries? what are the rules here? I think to maybe keep things straightforward here, I'll avoid his actual honda and yamaha liveries (those kids are not getting the gp11/12 let's be real) and stick to the lower class ones. now... those are aprilia liveries, and if aprilia wants to use some of those then please have at it. otherwise: vr46, lads, this is the way you want to go. here's 1999 (though 1998 also looks lovely):

one where the leathers and helmet really feels like a part of the design, like that's the bit that really completes the look. the dark grey base tone works as something you can layer all the fun stuff on. the font of the numbers! the warm reds and yellows! the stickers! this one's just FUN, it has a real adolescent verve and joy to it

and of course there's the mugello 1999 special livery:

she's so pretty!! recognisable! I don't even know what to say about this one apart from. look. it's fun. just something youthful and joyous and energetic to the whole thing... keeps things pretty straightforward on the colour front, the dark orange-brown highlights really brings it all together. or something

APRILIA

so. here's another question. are we just stuck with premier class liveries here? because if so, it's pretty slim pickings... but look, thirty images, we're not getting into everything they've been up to in the lower classes

luckily, aprilia do have quite a nice 2002 entry in the premier class:

dark colours are fun sometimes!! I like the shape of the ms logo! it's a bit chaotic, but in a fun way! it feels very aprilia, somehow. this would be my pick I think, I could easily transpose this to the current bikes in my mind's eye. aprilia kinda feels like it's supposed to be a bit chaotic, all those bits sticking off. love the red sleeves of the leathers

you could also go for the 2004 livery:

I'm not personally? super into the white and gold as a combination? definitely prefer the darker base colour of 2002. but it's quite distinctive - the red sleeves actually pop out more in this one. it's neat!

TRACKHOUSE

uh. um. uh. are they... allowed to run petronas colours? I mean it's basically still the same team? maybe they can borrow some aprilia ones? if not, then well they're the rahh rahh america team. I would ask ducati very nicely if maybe they could use this indianapolis 2009 livery in honour of the late nicky hayden:

I know you probably can't do that, but well! if you could, that'd be my pick for them! I like stars, america has stars on their flags, this is very rahh rahh america. the helmet and liveries are also fun and have stars on them. that's all I've got, sorry

KTM

okay, we've got an even bigger problem than aprilia here. these guys have NOT been in motogp long enough. my idea here was... so obviously ktm just do not have a suitable back catalogue of liveries, but aren't they like basically red bull? and red bull did like. a one off partnership with suzuki for laguna 2005, and suzuki isn't even in the sport any more so it's not like there's a CLASH there. I don't know how this works! whatever. I think it's nice!

it's not the most exciting thing I've ever seen in my life, but the red bull logo works well on the black. looks classy! and if suzuki gets mad then well red bull can just chuck money at them idk

the other option is... doesn't ktm own mv agusta now? go for one of those! they look quite similar for much of a decade, so I could have included another hailwood photo here - but I'm just going to use the early seventies mv agusta instead:

it's very simple, very basic. I'm not... sure this works on bikes these days. anyway I chose this one over its predecessor because I do like the stripes on the leathers, very adidas coded. if you can figure out how to make this whole design look good for the more complex bikes of today, then this would be a good pick imo. I like quirky shapes to put my numbers on... but sometimes circles are also good

TECH3

so. for a while, these are running the gauloises yamaha liveries, which we've already covered. maybe they could take the fortuna yamaha liveries instead that they used, especially if the factory yamaha squad doesn't want the kinda similar ones they ran at certain points. basically they're the red yamahas in the noughties. I'd go for 2004 tech3, which... y'know, the fortuna font is just quite nice, they're stylish liveries, they're just bikes you look at and go 'wow that sure is a nice bike'. and yes, we do need to at this point also mention the estoril 2004 spiderman livery

all I'm saying, if pedro acosta does not show up to silverstone on the spiderman bike. a part of me will be disappointed

otherwise, I thought the dunlops in 2007 were quite nice?

yes, yes, it's another yellow and black yamaha livery. but hey, it's a bit different from the one they referenced at laguna 2005, keeps things fresh. wouldn't mind this one

IN CONCLUSION

might add to these at some point, but those are kinda the first picks that come to mind! a lot of these are annoyingly recent, because most teams on the grid aren't that old. not quite sure what the rules of the game are here! which does mean that, as much as I enjoy the recent designs, I kinda hope honda and yamaha don't go for liveries from this century and dig a bit deeper in the archives

basically, what I'm looking for from the teams is a retro livery that a) is clearly recognisable to anyone familiar with said past livery, b) works with the actual shape of the current bike, c) looks different enough from their current livery, I want colour swaps, and d) looks cool. also, they should coordinate. istg if half of the grid shows up in white liveries... hopefully at least some of the teams will go for the fun ones!

[i3utterflyeffect]

Do your asks don't give notifications sometimes?

yeah! that happens sometimes. tumblr likes to eat asks it's just a thing with this site

[little-eye-guy]

twitter is suddenly not showing any post at all to me, not even my own. i made one mentioning this and immediately was told that the post did not exist

[neverendingford]

.

[floralovebot]

Could you share more on your thoughts about Vampire!Florelia??

YES OF COURSE

god dude i have SO many thoughts about vampire florelia but the one sort of au i keep thinking of is the whole "one of them is turned into a vampire first and now they have to deal with their lover aging without them oh no". it's so juicy,,,

cause obviously sappy florelia thoughts make me go "well both of them would be okay with turning into a vampire for the other", however!!! i just love the initial angst of it yknow,,, what if the first one to turn hides this from the others because they're scared,,, vampires aren't exactly treated as Good in the winx universe yknow? what if they're scared of turning evil? of hurting the others?? what if they run away instead???

the winx and specialists would naturally want to help them and i can see them looking for a way to reverse the vampirism, but what if they can't find anything? what if that person Does lose control and hurt someone?? THE ANGST POTENTIAL IS SO GOOD DUDE

i do also think about addams family vibes (a la morticia and gomez) vampire florelia too though,, no angst there just them being obsessed with each other <3

[byanyan]

@chronal-anomaly sent:ㅤShe knows holidays are difficult for them. They're difficult for her too, in a different way, with Christmas spent celebrating in freezing tents while distant sounds of war rocked the Earth beneath them. Then it was days spent at the VA, surrounded by friends and family alike. Lena always enjoyed the feeling of coming together, but there was always a part of her that ached for something of her own. Something of her own came true, crashing through her window and stealing her booze and fighting over the TV remote. A wet cat of a sibling, all claws and hissing comments, that chose her to curl up against. And Lena was so incredibly grateful for them, a balm against the yawn of independent loneliness that had followed her since discharging. Lena knew that holidays were hard for them, surrounded by the promise of what they should have had as a kid. Safety. Security. Love and appreciation and gifts. So Lena decided that Christmas would be whenever they returned to her flat next, where she had finger food and snacks waiting, cubed ham and leftover prime rib from the VA Christmas party, and three small gifts waiting on the table for them. In the first one, a decent multi tool with some heft, complete with two knives, a pair of scissors, pliers, some screwdrivers, and a litany of other random but helpful tools. The second, a gift certificate for a few free nights at a nearby hotel, and a gift card for their local delivery service, for those nights they had to get away. And the third gift, a large, awkward box sitting in the middle of the table. Lena had spent the most time working on it, pulling out ancient leather tools from a bag in the back of her closet. It was a custom harness, just like hers, designed for tagging and spray painting. A large D loop sat in front, just over the pelvis, to clip onto a safety rig. Other loops surrounded the rest of the harness, intended to clip bags onto, and three braces designed to hold active paint cans sat on the right and left hip, and against the lower back. A large buckle sat in the front and between the legs so it would be adjustable for them to be comfortable. And just before wrapping it up, she had dyed the whole harness a dazzling pink and red, complete with sparkles. Stars and other bright marks were stamped into the leather around the belt, marking it as their own. Merry Christmas, Byan.

ㅤit's the evening of the twenty-fifth when they show up at her window again, only a few days since they last came around, and with only the softest amount of hesitation due to the holiday attached to the date. ...and maybe also a little bit due to not wanting to have the gift they left for her addressed in any way, shape, or form.

not sure that lena will even be home, uncertain as to whether or not she has plans they aren't aware of with people they don't know about, byan approaches their usual entry point as they would on any other day: expecting nothing and perfectly content to have company or have the place to themself. some of the lights are on, but that doesn't always mean anything; not when she often leaves one or two running just in case they do show up. pulling the unlocked window open with habitual ease, they clamber through the same way they always do, the soles of their boots squeaking in the wet spot they've created as they turn in place to close the cold off once more.

ㅤㅤ" ey, lena, you home? "ㅤvoice raised so it can be heard through the entire flat, they begin shedding themself of all their layers — their backpack hits the floor first with a dull thump, quickly followed by their coat, gloves, and beanie, all tossed into a treacherous pile atop their bag. boots kicked off last, left to sit in the small, growing puddle of snow and mud which melts off of them, byan steps through the familiar surroundings, smoothing down ruffled hair with both hands and tying it all back with an elastic pulled from their wrist. a delayed and rather muffled call in response to their greeting draws a cursory glance down the hallway before they're continuing on their way to the kitchen for a snack.

it feels like it's just any other day and, for the briefest of moments, they almost forget that it's christmas, almost forget the present that they left for her in earnest, and almost forget that fear of her drawing attention to it and the obvious love and care it's representative of.

ㅤ—that is, until they step into the kitchen only to have it all slapped in their face with the sight of a small pile of presents sitting on the table.

freezing in the doorframe, all byan can do is stare in a stunned, wide-eyed silence. immediately, the thought 'don't be stupid, those aren't for you' echoes through their mind, urging them to drop their hopes back down to the floor. it wouldn't be the first time they were fooled by a stack of gifts left sitting around, after all. would be the first time it happened after the age of ten, though. but lena has friends and colleagues, people in her life other than them, and surely these are simply the gifts she hasn't been able to deliver yet. she's given them gifts before, sure — incredibly meaningful ones which they still treasure — but they've never expected any and still don't. it's going to be embarrassing when they walk over and see unfamiliar names on the gift tags, but at least she isn't in the room to witness them dashing their own stupid hopes.

circling the table like a nervous kitten who isn't quite sure of what to make of a new toy left on the floor, they cast an almost wary glance over their shoulder just in case lena and her scarily silent footsteps have managed to sneak up on them again. with no sign of her, and them now being close enough to catch a glimpse of the writing scrawled on each of the gifts, byan leans over in a failed attempt at nonchalance and scans for the names. then reads them again. —no, no, one more time, because they have to be misreading it.

ㅤㅤㅤ...byan. they all say byan.

caught up in processing this, they're only jerked back to the present by the excited click-clacking of chickadee's approaching footsteps, presumably with lena not far behind. the dog comes trotting in to the room, making a beeline straight for them, and although bewilderment still marks their features, byan doesn't do anything to stop the smile that spreads. in spite of their shock and the muddle of numerous other emotions all battling to take center stage, they drop to a crouch as chickadee comes closer, hands reaching out to rub the sides of her face in greeting.

ㅤㅤ" hey you. "ㅤa laugh escaping in a quiet chuff, they scrub their hands vigorously along her face and neck, head turning to the side with another bubble of laughter when she tries to lick their face in a greeting of her own. although they've allowed themself to be distracted, the teen watches out of the corner of their eye as lena moves toward the fridge and reaches inside. the sound seems to get the dog's attention as well, her head whipping around as her attention is thoroughly diverted. chickadee pads over to where lena rummages around, and byan slowly rises back to their feet, gaze flitting for a fraction of a second to the presents before finding lena once more.

ㅤㅤ" you— "ㅤthey begin, hooking a thumb toward the table with a dubious and almost nervous look now marking their features, only to find themself cut short in their attempted protest by a brusque shushing. mouth hanging open, body still, byan's eyebrows furrow, but all lena does is pull out a tray of various finger foods and smile warmly. there's a nod toward the table, and then she's gone, taking the food to the living room with chickadee quick on her heels.

ㅤ...damn. she's good. and she knows them far too well. knows that they'll try to protest an act of kindness, that they'll need time to process, and that they're as uncomfortable being watched opening gifts as they are directly delivering them. that's what they assume she's doing, anyway — giving them space — once they hear her settle down on the couch the next room over, leaving them alone with the presents she's now directed them toward.

practically bracing themself, byan looks back to the gifts stacked on the table and slowly sidles closer. there's no denying the little thrill of looking down at them all and wondering what's inside, the same way there's no denying the tightness in their throat that comes with knowing that lena picked all of it out for them. tentatively, they reach out for the first, the one closest to their hand, and pick it up. the heft of it has them instantly concluding that it's probably a knife and, once the paper has been shed, they think they're right. ...for all of a second. they aren't wrong, exactly, but they realize it's more than just that as they find themself pulling a variety of different tools free of the base and end up laughing to themself by the time they reach the third screwdriver. well, lena never did love their fondness for knives. they suppose that this way, she probably feels less like she's giving them a weapon. and they can't say that the multitude of tools won't come in handy, even if it is a lot less fun than, say, a new butterfly knife.

when they move on to the second gift, they no longer know what to anticipate. even with all the time in the world, they'd have never thought a free hotel room and food, much less multiple nights in a hotel. after reading the gift certificate several times over, byan is left dumbfounded, gazing down at it while they bite at the inside of their cheek, willing away the returning lump in their throat. they've never stayed in a hotel — at least, not that they can remember — but even they know that that shit's expensive for even just one night. more than one night and a gift card for delivery and there's still one more, much bigger gift waiting to be opened? what the fuck is she on, spending this kind of money on them? on some random fucking kid she has no relation to and no reason to care for?

for all of a moment, they come close to grabbing their things and running out the door. it's too much, it's too much, they don't deserve this, there's no reason for it—

ㅤ...and then they take a breath. remember all the hours they poured into not only lena's christmas gift, but all the others they've made for her as well. remember all the other things that she's done for them that she had no business doing; the way she's opened up her home to them, and the way she's listened with absolutely no judgement in those moments where they've needed to get something off their chest.

they think of her as a sister at this point, it's just... sometimes weird and kind of hard to remember that that goes both ways. she thinks of them as a sibling too, and that's okay. —it's better than okay, it's great. she's become their family, and they... have to work on accepting that.

still fighting the urge to take flight, yet relaxing some again, byan sniffs as they find that tears are now dangerously close to falling. tongue pinched between teeth as they beat back their emotions with a baseball bat made entirely of their own pride and shame — a bat that may as well squeak with the way it seems to fold against that which it's meant to fight — they swallow around the ever-growing lump in their throat and wipe at their eyes with the fuzzy pink sleeve of their sweatshirt. gift certificate set next to the multi tool because they can't handle looking at it any longer, dark eyes fall on the final, most mysterious package. with the way everything else has hit them... they're almost afraid to open it and find out what's inside. tempted to leave it, even. to step out onto the balcony and get absolutely zooted so they have an excuse to leave it unopened for the time being.

ㅤcuriosity, however, gets the better of them. as it so often does.

back to biting the inside of their cheek, byan tears through the wrapping paper, hoping desperately that this is some joke gift so they can laugh and stop dwelling on all the things they don't want to address or acknowledge. but that would be hoping for too much with a gift from lena, wouldn't it?

the crinkling of the paper stops abruptly the moment the box is opened to reveal the harness inside. identical to the one which they've admired every time she's pulled it out, perfect for tagging places they'd never been able to reach and doing pieces bigger than they've ever been able to before, but personalized specifically for them in its vibrant pink and its sparkles and its other very visible and present markings across the leather. god fucking dammit. of course the last one would not only be the biggest physically, but the biggest time and effort investment on her part, and biggest emotional impact on theirs. they have to hand it to her, she's a goddamn pro. no amount of biting or blinking or backing away and pacing across the room is enough to stop the tears from spilling now, and they have half a mind to be real fucking pissed right about now.

when lena has the audacity to come walking into the kitchen about fifteen minutes later like everything is completely normal, the harness is still sitting in its box and byan is all but flying at her. before she has a chance to react (or to look at their still very red eyes), they're wrapping around her in a constricting hug, hands bunching in the back of her shirt.

ㅤㅤ" fuck you. "ㅤcursing her out in a wet half laugh with no real hostility present in their tone, they swallow thickly and shut their eyes tight. damn her for taking everything they ever learned about the world and turning it on it's head. damn her for actually caring and making them feel loved. damn her for being so stupidly fucking thoughtful and making them think that maybe they are worth something. damn her for making them feel things and for making them cry like some pathetic child over the simplest things on more than one occasion!!

ㅤㅤ" what the fuck. like, what the fuck?? "ㅤvoice catching slightly on the repeat, byan gives lena a weak shake inside the hug before closing their arms even tighter around her and making a face into her shoulder. it's an expression of how much they like the gifts, how much all of it means to them, just... not in so many words. they think she'll get it though, considering how well she so obviously knows them.ㅤ" i hate you. thank you. —can we have dinner now? 'cause otherwise i'm prob'ly gonna break somethin'. "ㅤㅤi love you.

[blindedguilt]

//Happy 20th Anniversary, Drakengard! I've been fighting to write and finish up my inbox asks before the 25th of Obtober gets here (I have plans and i INTEND to follow through on them), and currently... I have a bunch of drafts :,) I'll get some soon, I promise!! I thought to myself "If I even get at least two done before the month is up I'll feel content with myself" so fingers crossed!! //Anyways, I made some art of the boy to celebrate~

//I'm gonna try a challenge run for Drakengard after this: I'm honestly doubtful it can be done entirely, but I'm going to try and see how far I can get in the game just using Leonard lmao //I'll keep you posted on how far I get fkghsdkghbkdjf

[danthropologie]

The thing is he was offered a seat at RB and he turned it down to be the number one at mclaren so I don’t see him leaving them ever. He doesn’t wanna be a second driver so he’ll stay at mclaren and be number one no matter how horrible they are. Plus let’s not forget ZB sits on the board of quadrant 😂

also let's not forget that lando's dad is—and has been since lando was just a reserve driver!��investing obscene amounts of money in mclaren every year. money that would be less...effective in a larger team with a larger budget (at least pre-cost cap)

[love-strikes-thrice]

[Image Description: screenshot of Tumblr tags on light mode.

Tags read:

Getting real suspicious about the conflation of fantasy with reality in fandom.

"You must only read good and pure things! Otherwise you're secretly evil (smiley face)" is the song of book burners and history revisionists.

The growing number of fans treating shipping as a sign of moral purity is troubling at best and terrifying at worst.

Never trust someone who tells you to police your thoughts.

Never trust someone who tells you that bad thoughts are the same as bad actions.

And most of all.

Never trust a purity spiral.

Fandom

ID End]

I really think everyone needs to truly internalize this:

Fictional characters are objects.

They are not people. You cannot "objectify" them, because they have no personhood to be deprived of. They have no humanity to be erased. You cannot "disrespect" them, because they are not real.

[sillyfreakx5]

he didn't respond for over 5 hours and it's the middle of the day in his timezone aaaaa did i do something wrong??? (he usually replies quite quickly and i already sent several texts)