#if i do this to you and it makes you uncomfortable Blease let me know

[etherealspacejelly]

currently having a problem where i cant stop calling people babygirl. like. mutuals on here. but i dont say it to your faces because i dont know whos comfortable with that and who isnt. so im just sitting here in my head going 'omg hey babygirl' but i censor it when i actually type it out. if that makes any sense

anyways. like this post if i can call you babygirl (in a completely platonic and gender neutral way of course)

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

ML Lies Episode Predictions:

There’s Two?? (don’t trust my math) more days before lies completely destroys me, so I’m going to make some predictions, and by predictions I mean wishlist. My walls are already up, so if none of these happen I won’t be disappointed, but also a girl can dream: (this is somehow 1700 entire words long because I have a lot of feelings, so it’s under a cut, you’re welcome)

—Adrien and Kagami’s are secretly dating: please I want it so bad, I’ve talked about this so much and emotionally I need it!! At the very least I want them to sneak out together so so bad I’d cry. But also, if they’re hiding it from their other friends for whatever reason, thats SUCH good angst potential.

—If we get to see some kinda montage of them sneaking out??? Id ride that high for months. Even just one actual example of them working together to sneak out would obliterate me. Like, how it shows Kagami sneaking out to go to the game in Ikari Gozen?? I’d cry

—The breakup happens as a direct result of it being a secret relationship: this would be SUCH a good parallel to lukanette. Lukanette broke up because Luka wanted Marinette to be more open with him and he hated being in the dark, so just, the parallels if Adrien wants to be more open about adrimi and Kagami is like “you dont understand, if your dad finds out about us he will end this immediately” but Adrien wants to believe that its going to be okay and no one will react badly? I’m probably explaining this badly and I’ll try to explain it better later I just,,, want parallels and opposites and truth v lies and hhhhh

—Fencing??? Friendly/ affectionate competition??? Them being idiot jocks in love??? Please??? I want to see them compete!!

—I’d love to see Kagami character growth + Adrimi relationship development!!! I want her to love herself more and be more comfortable around him!!!

—Specifically, if there was a parallel to Riposte,, and Adrien beat Kagami in a fencing match and Kagami was like “Oh nice!! :D good game!” I’d be so happy I’d cry!! And it’s kinda implied by Chat Blanc that they’re already there in there relationship?? But not confirmed?? So if I saw it or saw confirmation of it I’d cry!!

—in one of the released photos it looked like they were holding hands??? And at this point my expectations are so low I don’t even trust it yet but blease,,, let them hold hands,, i’d cry of joy

—If Adrien is also constantly leaving and disappearing due to akuma responsibilities, I want it to read SUPER differently from the Lukanette because I love parallels/foils!! Marinette disappears on her dates with Luka and its just “oh marinette is really distracted and busy and frazzled” but I dont think Adrimi but be loke that at all!!! Because as far as Kagami knows, she has the same backstory/current story as Adrien. She’s risking a lot by sneaking out to go on dates with him?? So Adrien seeing an akuma and being like “oh sorry father is calling” isnt even suspicious or anything??? Its 100% believable!!! If her mother called she’d immediately be like “oh fricking heck i Need To Leave this instant immediately.” So its less “Adrien doesnt care about her” and more of just twisting the knife and reminding her that life doesnt want them to be together and Adrien is never going to be free!!! Big ouch to her heart!!!

—also I want!!!! Them!!! To talk about their feelings!!! Because parallels to truth!!! Adrien is like “sorry I have to go” and Kagami is like “oh I hate that so much” and Adrien is like “big same.” (Also idk how realistic this is but I’d love it if ‘Kagami talking about her feelings’ wasn’t the cause of strife in their relationship!! Like, she talks about how she feels and when she’s upset and Adrien is like “yeah me too” and they’re just,, good bros)

—I need them to stay friends after the breakup, i need it i need it i need it!!! And the whole issue is!! I feel like the main reason they’d date is to try and hang out more?!?? So if the breakup was actually them talking to each other and being like “hey so this isnt working with sneaking out, we’re going to need to go back to the way it was before,” rather than them saying they were bad for each other???? Hoo boy i’d lose my mind

—Also!!! My favorite prediction, I’d die of joy if this happened (and also of angst). I want there to be so much drama with “secret relatinship” stuff that they try to fix it by going public with their relationship!! Very low chance of this actually happening but its okay if it doesnt, thats what the fanfiction I’m inevitably going to write immediately after watching the episode is for!!! But anyway,, multiple ways this could happen.

Maybe they’ve been secretly dating since Miracle Queen and they decide to go public at the beginning of this episode and that’s the primary source of plot/conflcit!!! I’d be thrilled!!!

BUT!!! if the episode ends with then Not Breaking Up, but instead deciding to go from dating secretly to dating publicly???? Holy Freaking Heck,,, I’d go feral with emotion!!!! I also need to expand on this so much more but basic rundown of how I imagine it could happen (again: Is it likely?? Probably not! but this is my last chance to dream):

Kagami is like “listen we have the same backstory and I KNOW in my soul that this relationship wouldn’t work if it was public”

Adrien is like “okay yeah I feel you, thats fair”

Kagami goes on dates with Adrien and its fun and nice and lovely and the honeymoon phase is so good and exciting

Adrien starts disappearing a lot, partly because of akuma attacks, but partly because of nathalie and gabe calling him constantly

Adrien starts to be like “well actually i think that my dad does care about me probably? And if he knew why I wanted to go he’d let me! Or at least Nathalie would because clearly she cares about me!”

Kagami is like “hhhnngg have you met them?? You think they’d want you to be happy and free??” Except she can’t just SAY that because if she did then she’d be crushing Adrien’s entire heart and possibly also making him get really defensive and he has to come to the conclusion that his parents are good on his own

Kagami also starts to get frustrated with how much more often Adrien has to leave than she does?? And its because of akuma attacks but she doesnt know that and he cant tell her

Adrien starts to get frustrated because he can take the “having to leave for akuma attacks” part but when he finally finishes an akuma battle and Natalie immediately calls him it is just aaaaaAAAAAAAA and he just wants to believe so badly that he could at least take control of that part??? He could at least get Nathalie to help him out??? Probably maybe right???

Because we all know he HATES having to keep secrets from Ladybug, but he’ll do it for her, and he’ll keep his life as Chat a secret, but Kagami??? He should at least be able to talk about that, right?? He’s not doing anything bad/dangerous/etc

Also there could very well be some angst with Adrien being so so worried about Nathalie because she’s bedridden and his dad is being sketchy and he’s SEEN this before and he doesn’t want to be avoiding Natalie or lying to her because what if he loses her too??? He’d feel so guilty! And he needs the support of a parent figure so much,,, so he HAS to tell her the truth

But he respects Kagami’s wishes and he’s not going to betray her trust

But unlike Lukanette, they DO talk about their feelings and they disagree and stuff, and even if he’s trying not to be confrontational, Kagami is like “i can tell youre uncomfortable about something, please just tell me what it is” so he tells her that he disagrees

Kagami gets akumatized?? idk if it’s even been confirmed that she’s the akuma “Lies” but I’d assume she is because parallels to Lukanette

Maybe it happens as a direct result of some moment where Kagami and Adrien are arguing and in the heat of the moment he says something hurtful??

Maybe they’re arguing and then Adrien has to leave before it can resolve and Kagami is mad about it even though shes trying not to be and she gets akumatized???

Maybe she does say something like “bc your dad sucks and nathalie sucks!” and he yells or something (i want to see Adrien yell and be flawed let me live, and this is one of the most likely scenerios for it to happen bc it would HURT for him)

Maybe Kagami shoots back with anger, maybe Adrien’s been calm but Kagami gets mean for a moment, but regardless, Kagami says something about her true feelings of anger at nathalie/gabe/ etc and before Adrien can respond he’s like “oh shoot sorry I need to get home NOW”

Then for one brief second Kagami’s TERRIFIED that he’s going to tell nathalie about this in his anger and then nathalie’s going to be like “oh kagami is clearly bad for you because she made u this upset” and Adrien will LISTEN because hes stupid and he still listens to his horrible adult figures and Kagami is so mad about the entire situation so then in her moment of weakness she gets akumatized

Look at that its a direct opposite of Lukanette because Luka was afraid of Marinette keeping secrets about why she’s always vanishing because he doesnt know and Kagami is afraid of Adrien telling secrets about why HEs always vanishing bc she thinks she does know,,

But anyway, after she gets de-akumatized, she’s so ashamed of it and she can see how far she took it and how many people it hurt,, and Adrien is really sad and apologetic and trying to support her,, and she’s like “no clearly I was actually wrong, keeping this a secret is hurting you and its hurting me and now its hurting random civilians”

So she tells Adrien that they should tell people about it and stop dating in secret

And then multiple possible ending:

Does he say “actually no, youre right, they wouldnt let this happen, so if we cant date in public and dating in secret is hurting us then we shouldnt date at all” and thats how the breakup goes??? That would literally obliterate me

Does the episode end on a false positive where Adrien hasnt told them yet and he is like “yeah this is gonna be great” and there isnt an actual breakup yet?? Because that would also kill me (even though i doubt theyre going to let adrimi take up that much time in the show but, let me dream)

Also if Adrien is like “we shouldnt tell my parents but we should tell someone” and then they tell Marinette and now shes got ANOTHER secret to keep and aaaaaaaAAAAA?? Id die on the spot

I’m still holding out hope that the episode will give me enough crumbs to at least be able to write this better, but regardless of what happens in the episode,,, the chances of me eventually writing fanfiction exploring this are SO HIGH, I’ve been thinking about this for ages

In conclusion:

—no matter what happens in lies, its going to destroy me

—please let them be in a secret relationship it makes so much sense for their characters and for the drama and aaaaAAAAA

—also please give me the parallels to lukanette where their issues are exactly the opposite and it still falls apart

Thank you for your time, I’ll be excitedly vibrating at the speed of sound for the next two days until we get answers!! Depending on how the episode goes, I’ll either be writing so much adrimi fluff to recover,, so much adrimi angst to vent,, or I’ll be staring at the ceiling screaming for a few days as I post nothing but keysmashes and try to sort through my emotions :)

[theblackbirdsgemimagines]

Ramble away, cause I feel the twisted head rot, I kinda wanna see what you think about our bois. ~ a pocket sized dragon hops in excitement.

A POCKET SIZED DWAGOOOOOONNNN 😭💞💞💞 That’s so BLESSED, and tysm omg, I’m very glad to just spill out my barking on every boy, bc yEAH THE BRAIN ROT SKDHAKDB

THE BRAIN ROT IS SO REAL LOL

Everything I breathe ends up relating to TWST in some way, like at this point just let me take my friends, cousins, and pets, and of course Lulu and Seb, and I will have 1. A Gottdamned Harem, 2. So Many Children, and 3. NEVER WANT TO LEAVE. Kwfhskdhjwek

Ok this is gonna be long bc I gotta cover all my boys, so rip lol.

Dorm Leads:

Riddle

GOD, my Fucking Baby, my CHILD, my SWEET BABY BOY, I’M 👁💧👄💧👁

I would die for him, beetch, he is PRECIOUS ♥️

He reminds me of how I feel Ciel would behave if S/O took the place as Sebastian’s contracee, too, so like 🥺 Lots of feels 😭

Is Son, I have adopted him now. If you mistreat him, don’t ever speak to me or my son ever again. I’ll FIGHT his MOM, don’t TEST me. I’m his new mom now. His BIRD mom. So proud of him, he’s like...one of the few that’s actually shown growth in canon after his overblot kshdkadjs

Leona

👁💧👄💧👁

.....I am a Mere Simp....

Ya’ll.... I swearh to ghOD I simped hard for Scar back when I was a wee thing, I did NOT expect to simp for him AGAIN LATER IN LIFE, what the FUCK aidhskdhskdj

Like shit bitch, damn, you may not be king of Afterglow honey, but you can be king of my heart if you wAnt to bb....

Leona: *smiles once, even if it’s smugly*

Me: *WEEPING* Look at hiiiiiiim!! My sunshine booooooy! 😭

Does this make me a furry

Probably

I am too Simp to Care Anymore

I HESITATED TO GET ATTACHED BC THIS BOY LOOKS LIKE A FUCKIN WOMANIZER IF I EVER SAW ONE, BUT HE DRINKS HIS RESPECT WOMEN JUICE EVERY SINGLE MORNING AND I WAS A GONNER SNDJAJDHSJ

FUCK

Call me a Herbivore again, bully me //SLAPPED

Azul

He secretly a lil shit sometimes, but tha’s ok, it’s mostly in a silly way, especially post overblot~ UvU

The sweetest bby everytime I read fanposts on him, like god, ah 💜💜💜 WHOMST COULD BULLY SUCH A CUTE CHUBBY OCTOBABY I’LL FIGHT ALL OF EM!! A sweetheart 10/10 would be his friend 💗 Not making contracts with him tho, lol

...ok maybe SOME after his overblot, but they’re able to be easily reversed now, so it’s way more chill andhsjdj

Kalim

FUCK!!!! F U C K!!!! BABYYYYYYY!!!! BABY!!!! I HAVE ADOPTED HIM IF YOU TOUCH HIM YOU D I E

He is literally so sweet, anytime anyone was like “you’re so nice it’s annoying” I WAS READY TO COME FLYING IN TO BITCH SLAP THEM LIKE AJDHSKDHSJ (even if I also loved them lol)

Like NO you are WRONG whfksjd

He has also grown so much, and I am proud ♥️🧡

Vil

Jesus Christ, canon Vil is Hurting Meeeeee ajdhskdhsj

My fave fanon Vil is the one that recognizes all different types of beauty, though~ uvu and is v encouraging to anyone that may be struggling with self hatred 💜

Canon: Vil is pretty~.

Me: Wow, wtf???? He IS so pretty... How rude I didn’t think you were serious! Wow him??? Pretty??? Wow??? Wow...

Idia

I’m not sure yet, as I haven’t seen him very often, but of the few times that I have: BIG same, huge mood, and Me FUCKING Too, goddamn akdhakdj

Idia is my Anxiety and Anime Nerd personified tbh lol

What Ortho is to him are what all my comfort characters are to me, honestly.

Like what would you like bby, you want that singing voice?? Ok here comes a synthesizer just special for you~. Ily, mwah~ u3u 💕

Malleus

HEAVY BREATHING

Ok maybe it’s just the lack of story/info out on him yet, but I don’t currently simp as hard for him compared to Leona, I’ll admit jajdkajd

BUT BOY HOWDEY DO I EVER STILL S I M P...

He Is Baby... And I Lob Him....

I am going to smooch those horns and forehead crown of beautiful scales 🖤🖤🖤 I am going to do it!!!! Here I go!!!

HE CAN HAVE ALL THE ICE CREAM AND TAMAGATCHI DATES HE WANTS I’M- 😭

This man is too precious for words, and I have so much childhood nostelgia to ‘enchanted’ woods, and being in the mountains, so he has Old Fae Friend vibes to me~🖤

DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON F-

Ngl I ship him and Leona a lil bit lol

No, not just bc that makes a poly with my two faves easier, but that is a bonus factor jadhajdj

Vice Dorm Heads:

Trey

Oh my god, the Daddy to my Mommy with all these newly adopted lil kids of ours, ya know??? What a wholesome sweetie and funny lil shit jahdksdh~

I love him, I would gladly make tarts with, AND for him 💚💚💚

The kind of boi who I’d ship HARD with anyone he started dating bc My God it would warm my heart So Much 💞💞

Ruggie (unofficial but may as well be at this point lol)

He took a while to grow on me kadhskdhsj

But I think he’d be a sweet, if a trouble-maker of a friend to have~.

Dank you for taking care of my sweet lion bby, honey, I’m sure Farrena is a sweetheart, but boi I hope he gets his shit together to fix up where Ruggie lives 😭

I think if I met his granny, I’d CRY jadhajsh 💗💗

Leech Twins (?)

Idk if they’re vice leaders, but who cares lol

THESE are the older Big Brothers in every sense of the word. (My canon ages most everyone up just a bit, save for Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Kalim, Jamil, Cheka, and anyone already 20+)

The ANNOYING older big brothers, lol.

The ones that hug you to death (Floyd), or use you for an arm rest (Jade), and specifically Do the thing you asked/told them NOT to Do.

This is fine with me tho, I’m an only child, please give me the experience of annoying older brothers lol 💙💚

Jamil

I used to hate you bby, I’m so sorry akdhskdhs

I’ve adopted him now, and I’m v proud he’s trying, but making clear what his boundaries are, and trying to come out of a shell he was made to be in for so long 😭

AND HIS DANCING IS SICK LIKE HONESTLY I’M SUCH A PROUD MOM 💗💗💗

Rook

God. FUCKING Rook, lol.

IDK IF I SHOULD TRUST YOU, but I also kinda wanna be your friend akdhakdjs

HE CONCERNS ME but he also seems nice and v sweet sometimes, lmao

Blz don’t stalk me tho 😬

STOP SHOOTING YOUR ARROWS AROUND SCHOOL YOU BLOODY HEATHEN FRENCH PRISS, YOU ARE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE

Also, if he DARES hunt cute animals around me, especially BIRDS, I am going to GRIP him jahdkahdsk

He’s like if Lord Druitt was a Little More Nice and a Little Bit Less Creepy ajdhak

Lilia:

GOD.

I LOVE THIS FUCKING GRANDPA.

I. FUCKING. LOVE. THIS FUCKING. GRANDPA.

I absolutely hc him as nonbinary w/masc pronouns, I absoLUTELY do.

I adore him, I love him, I haven’t gotten a squish (hardcore desire to be someone’s friend, lol) this hard for a character since AngelDust, I-

Pwease be nonbinary friends with me, Lilia 🥺

THE ONLY PERSON HERE SHORTER THAN ME, BUT I’LL TAKE IT AJDHAKDHJS

Anyone know Corpse and how he plays Among Us? That’s how I see Lilia playing his video games with friends and I JUST I JUST I J U S T

The Spencer to your Carly.

He and Crowley are free to compete as Dad with me too like honestly kshdkadjjs

He’ll always be granpa tho uvu 💚💖🖤

Extras:

Ace

God, the Fucking Annoying Middle Brother that pranks you ALL THE DAMN TIME, but I love him andhakdhsk

Deuce

THE BROTHER THAT WILL BEAT UP YOUR BULLIES 💙💙💙 SWEET BABY BOY

The Josh to Ace’s Drake. The Cody to Ace’s Zack. The Freddie to your Carly and Ace’s Sam.

If he and Ace started dating, tho, I would CRY.

But regardless who they end up dating, it’ll be slow burn friends to lovers, and literally the most adorable shit to watch EVER 💞💞💞😭

Cater

Seems Like A Womanizer But Actually Drinks His Reapect Women Juice And We Stan That 🧡

Can always count on him to help tou get the best Magicram shots, bless you Cater 🧡🧡

Also rly wanna be his friend, ngl 😭 Even IF he pranks me a lot kadhakdhsj

Jack:

H E AV Y BR EA T H IN G

Ngl my feelings for him are in the air IDK IF I WANNA SMOOCH OR NOT YET I JUST KNOW I LOB HIM HE GOODEST BESTEST BOY 💛💛💛😭

If all three Savannaclaw bois got in a cuddle pile with me, I would Not Be Mad

How can I give this boy love, tell me and I will Do It

Gift him all the cacti’s he WANTS💛

God he drinks that respecc women juice bright and early on his run every morning, you KNOW he does 💛💛💛

I wawnt to pet his ears an tail an fwuffy wolf form 😭

I WAWNT TO SEE THE BOY SMILE AND BE HAPPY 💞💞💞

Sebek

CHILL CHILL CHILL CHILL CH-

He is a v devoted guard tho, we love to see it UvU

I don’t have more info on him hekdhskdj but his fanmade content seems v v sweet~ 💚

Silver

HE ATTRACTS BIRDS AND I CRY ABOUT IT PLEASE BE MY FRIEND AND TEACH ME HOW 🥺🥺🥺

Him being raised by Lilia and Malleus literally gives me so much Fucking Seratonin....... God 💞💕💗💗💞💞💗💗💕💞

Ortho

IS BABY????? IS BABY!!!!!! I’M LOVE HIM I’M ADOPTING HIM IS BABYYYYYYY 💙💙💙💙💙

Cheka:

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

He is so FUCKING CUTE what the FUCK!

Leonaaaaaaa... 🥺 Your NEPHEWWWWW 😭

I might steal him from Farrena tbh, lIKE MY CHILD NOW~ 🧡🧡

I just sob and hug him every time I see him honestly 😭

Teachers:

Dire Crowley

Ohhhhhh god oh god oh god

Be my dad. Please. Be my dad. PLEASE be my dad. Ya’ll think I’m joking, I’m not. Please adopt me. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

This man as a father gives me so much dopamine and oxytocin and seratonin??? I have been weeping for WEEKS, please adopt me, Sir

Fathers with zero braincells being wrapped around a daughter’s little finger makes me so weak, and I am just here with Daddy Issues like ajdhakdhsj BLEASE ADOPT ME MISTER BIRD MAN

Crewel

Ew.

Forgive me, I haven’t seen much content with him in it/that could be considered wholesome, bUT JADHWKDJSJ

UncoMFORTABLE

Please keep the kink talk out of the classroom, S I R

Call me puppy one more time, see what happens, I’m not scared to fight a teacher akdhakdhsj

Trein

The Dad Figure that tries to be the stern part to Crowley’s blumbering kahdkqrhsjdj

Don’t feel as much attachment to him emotionally, but I like him~

Just let me pet your cat sometimes and give you holiday presents, and we’re cool~ ♥️

Vargas

Found the womanizer //SMACKED

And of course, I can’t forget Grim~!

He’s grown on me, and if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in the room, and then myself 😭

I will pet and snuggle and hold him all he wants and feed him all the tuna his heart desires uvu 💙

[tickle-bugs]

ALSO GIMME MORE DIEGO BUT LIKE ESPECIALLY GROWLY ANGSTY TICKLISH S1 DIEGO

YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT GROWLY DIEGO BLS

- GROWLY!!!! GIGGLES!!!!!!!!! He gets so aNGRY when he’s teased like it’s a defense mechanism??? he’s just permanently >:( and in his little pea brain he’s like “growl = no tickle” but baby,,, thats not how it works,,,,,

- He resists every aspect of his childhood so s1 diego? being tickled? bls. Thinking about Klaus playfully pinching his side or something and he’s all >:( “dont touch me” which,,, never works with siblings so idk why he bothers

- Thinking about Diego coming downstairs to Klaus tickling Allison (bc tbh she needs to relax and their friendship is Everything to me) and he’s all blushy and awkward and just,,, storms out of the room while Allison and Klaus share a Look.

- He’s so averse to just,,, enjoying himself (notice how he hid before dancing in s1). He doesn’t think he’s allowed to have fun because he has to be Serious and The Leader. 

- You know what? I bet he loves it though. genuinely, deep down, the affection makes him feel so warm because when does he ever get to relax and just...be? Maybe for a little while, before things went sour with Patch. He’s so busy worrying about being the hero that he never lets his guard down and he needs to. 

- Blease just give me Klaus like,,, tackling him to the couch and going to town and Diego literally goes adbkfshvfsd???? And Allison sits near his head like “Shh just have fun. We’ll let you go in ten seconds.” and she counts down while she runs her nails over his neck and ears, and they immediately let him go. Is Diego a little bummed that they stopped? Yes. Is he glad that they actually stopped, instead of making him uncomfortable? Also yes.

- Just,,, give me Allison and Klaus reintroducing fun into his life, little by little, and nudging him to accept that physical affection and fun are Absolutely Okay. 

- ALSO VANYA!!! Diego is SO protective of her and I just want Vanya like,,, running her nails over his scalp on habit, because that was a thing with them when they were younger. Diego, overwhelmed and upset with his stutter going to find Vanya in her room,,, and they just sit on her bed and she hums and just,, vibes with him (or plays for him, if he’s okay with it). S1 Diego and Vanya doing that? I would cry. Her fingers dip a little too low and he scrunches and chuckles and she doesn’t mention it, but if her fingers accidentally brush over his neck and ears every once in a while and pull out little giggles? Oopsies, your honor.

thank you for this request I am returning to my Roots 

[salamoonder]

thoughts on cr episode 108 before i disappear into my writing hole:

drunk characters are so so good for character development conversations, ugh

i’m so super proud of caleb and my widobrave heart is exploding right alongside my empire-siblings-cohabitate-endgame thoughts because they are literally perfectly suited to one another

if sam leaves again i will scream

okay the big salt: the beau, cad, fjord conversation made me suuuuper uncomfortable. i have no doubt that jester would be horrified, betrayed, hurt, etc. if she knew they were talking like that. literally it was “okay so we all silently agreed that we’re going to humor jester and treat her like a child in need of a bodyguard behind her back right”. gross. gross gross. beau’s attitude in particular was...i don’t know if y’all have ever had a friend who Hates your best friend that you have known all your life and keeps saying they want to punch them despite having actually interacted with them a total of maybe three times, even if said best friend is being Gross, but it is an awful, awful feeling.

HAVING SAID THIS. i shouldn’t have to put this reminder but because some people like to indiscriminately hate on the actors instead of the characters: i support all of their character choices, really i do, and i also think laura has been deliberately encouraging the infantilization of jester (in the characters, at least) for quite some time. see how insistent she got that matt not reveal jester’s age. i’m interested to see what comes of this character arc.

also caduceus,,,number one offender in treating jester like a child but tbh it’s cause he does it with the whole rest of the nein too. caddy. blease. i love you. i get that you’re the second youngest and therefore you have to be Like This whenever you encounter new people younger than you but pleaaase

alright anyway. salt over, “i want to be wherever you are” fucking broke me

veth is a legend don’t look at me don’t touch me i fucking love veth oh my god oh my g

me during the break in my head was just a dozen different scenarios of “ok here’s how moonweaver cleric jester can still win”

the dichotomy of fjord letting go of caduceus and telling jester she had to let go? absolutely beautiful

on that note. i do not like how fjord was engaging w beau and caduceus as aforementioned but kudos to him by facilitating her making her own choice. i was sure he was going to thunder step outta there and just hope she wouldn’t resist but he surprised me. thank you fjord for letting her make that choice.

as an aside i find the moonweaver’s double standards genuinely hilarious. but also jester lavorre loves deeply enough to impress a god and idk if we can beat that tbh

to be honest it’s been hard for my brain to pay attention to anything else bc a voice in the back of my head is screaming, REXXENTRUM ARC REXXENTRUM ARC REXXENTRUM ARC

REXXENTRUM AAAAARC

seriously

yall. listen

i want caleb to go kill trent and get astrid and wulf out So Bad

i say “get them out” bc i think it’s fair to say even at this point we still don’t know how much they’re acting of their own free will. like they’re definitely making Some Choices but even if they’re not being magically controlled anymore i assume trent has collateral on all his students, in case someone gets Ideas

i’m so torn between “super happy that they’re maybe going back to rexxentrum” and “my blumendrei epic is nowhere near done and i want more time to finish it before all my headcanons are likely entirely shattered by canon”

but also i want to see how accurate some of my predictions/guesswork is

i’m fucking stuck yall

i genuinely forgot how much i love yussa

also it’s hilarious how much yussa was supposed to be the essek but now essek is the essek like the m9 couldn’t go for the “vaguely-broody-and-prideful-but-essentially-good-mage” nah it had to be “this man literally did not care that he helped start a war”

also i miss essek

cannot fucking wait for sam to smack us all with like the third shoe dropping when veth talks to yeza again

anyway that’s about it for now feel free to send me asks on any of this apologies for the context-less salt last night i am happy to clarify any of it i will be answering all the asks sitting in my inbox now

[kinkymagnus]

Hey I've read a lot of your posts, where Magnus is a trans boy and I like that a lot, but I was wondering if you don't like the canon cis male Magnus? I'd ask you non-anonymously too, but I'm honestly scared of some people's hate messages for a question like this... sorry

long answer long answer lmao

hmgmgmnggg ok so i, hm. ok, i don’t think this was meant in a rude way at all, and i promise im in Education(TM) mode not Kill The Malicious Evil Transphobe(TM) mode like im not, accusing you of anything here, at all 

but i do have a few Issues with like, the way this was asked i guess

i will answer your question just--give me a sec, im a little uncomfortable here

also like, ok, i get why you’re sending it anonymously, it’s cool--personally i’ve never seen anyone get hate on behalf of trans magnus headcanons (rather than against them) but i mean, hate can come in all shapes and sizes i guess? and anxiety, so. whatever, it’s fine, i get it

but anyway moving on: first, “canon” cis magnus. my dude... my guy... did at any point magnus say I Am Cisgender or pull out his dick.... like... neither trans or cis magnus is really “canon” just as like, you know, izzy isn’t confirmed straight or bi or pan. we know she likes dudes and personally i think the way she looks at clary indicates she sure do like girls, too, but that doesn’t seem to have been intended so it’s debatable, and that’s basically it. 

also, in the context of just like... historical shit, realistically magnus isn’t cis. is he trans in the way i write about (like afab, “pre op”)? no, not necessarily in canon (although he isn’t... not that either i guess--we do see his flat chest, no scars, but HYPOTHETICALLY that could be a glamour, or the scars are magically healed. we know he has an adams apple, but there ways to do that without magic, let alone with magic. so like. i’m just saying.) 

but like, he wouldn’t be cis how we understand it either by the simple virtue of being much older than the western gender binary as we know it. even if he was born with a penis and all of that and identified as a Man(TM) And Nothing Else that wouldn’t mean his idea of masculinity/manhood would be the same as ours, or that it wouldn’t at least be shaped by very different factors. so like. even if my version of trans magnus isn’t confirmed canon, cis magnus certainly isn’t either i think. that might be slicing hairs or getting finnicky with language, but it’s how i feel about it. 

and just assuming that he’s canonically cis rubs me the wrong way, like, characters aren’t cishet by default, you know? obviously the writers probably weren’t intending to make him trans, and cc certainly wasn’t when she stole his character from dark hunters and made it “her own”, or else there’d be a bunch of transphobic tropes in there, but like, you know, death of the authors, we make sense of canon now. intentions arguably don’t matter, we do with the story what we will, especially when working within it.

again i don’t think you were necessarily being like “well magnus is canonically cis so :/” but it rubs me the wrong way and is something i’ve seen before so like, yeah

secondly, “trans boy” magnus versus “cis male” magnus. why boy, anon. why boy

(god why does “why boy” sound like a bizarre t-shirt slogan or a mbmbam segment--NO, BRAIN. WE ARE ON SERIOUS BUSINESS.) 

but seriously tho like the sort of infantilization of trans men is really a thing (seeing them as “soft bois” and “uwu cute boys” and feminine/soft/small/delicate) and like, specifically calling magnus a trans boy versus when he’s cis he’s a “male” (which technically can refer to any age but has those like, Connotations) sits wrong with me. like, magnus isn’t a boy, you know? i mean i get making jokes like “aw my boys <3″ or whatever, but with this it’s not that say memey context AND specifically it concerns a trans man (not to mention him being asian) so like, it feels, yikes? like just. he isn’t a “trans boy”

im sorry i realize it seems like im just like harshly picking apart your answer and i really dont mean to sound like a bitch here but like, again. Education(TM) mode not Anon Hate(TM) mode. just for learning, it’s cool, i’m not angry at you, it’s chill. 

to answer your question with the yikes language gently nudged to the trash chute: do i dislike cis magnus? 

simple answer: yes.

complicated answer: not really. i already stated why i don’t like Cis(TM) magnus as it feels unrealistic and dumb and also he just doesn’t have cis energy lmao, but if you just mean like... well this isn’t really “cis” but kind of what people mean in this context, AMAB magnus (meaning he was “assigned male at birth” aka has a penis and all that) and he’s canonically gnc so like, he’s “cis” even if his understanding of masculinity might be different than ours and obviously we’ve seen him be gnc and all that.... i don’t really hate that, and objectively, i have no issues with it, but personal taste wise, i basically only read/write trans magnus as you see on my blog now. because i’ve kind of absorbed it as “canon” in my head (fanon, i guess, lmao) 

plus, just generally trans magnus is really important to me because like, a) he is #goals i too want to be a muscular gnc hottie, b) he’s relatable and i project all my shit onto him lmao, c) it just feels very validating, in a lot of ways--with the sexual preferences i write about, his insecurities, just the way he looks, and him being trans is just kind of reassuring, you know? also d) i honestly think it fits him/his character/his backstory and he just has the vibes u kno 

so basically, Cis(TM) magnus? no-go. cis magnus as in AMAB/identifies as a man full stop even if it’s wibbly wobbly compared to current times and lbr no one is going to really explore that much beyond him being outwardly gnc sometimes? fine, whatever. trans afab magnus still being gnc as hell? yessssssss

ldkgjfgh anyway im glad you like my posts!!! and hopefully ive Inducted Another Into The Trans Magnus Cult (thats a joke, but seriously, im just like,,,,,maam do u have time for ur lord and savior trans magnus?? maam blease)  

[cryoculus]

Part 3 for the ushiwaka soulmate au BLEASE !

← Part One

← Part Two

» Word Count: 6,162 words

You guys can all support this whole thing on AO3 as well :3c Also,,,, this is SO long congrats if you don’t puke with the word count 

***

Fall had already begun months before Ushijima noticed.

In his defense, securing Shiratorizawa’s spot in Nationals was practically the only thing that plagued his mind on a daily basis since September rolled around. The change in season was the last thing on the ace’s mind. 

Even if Shiratorizawa was the crowd favorite, one could never be too sure with a victory that hasn’t happened yet. And that bitter truth came crashing down on him like a bullet that shot an eagle out of the sky. They’ve been soaring through the heavens for so long, he’d forgotten what it felt like to plummet to the ground.

But he supposed this wasn’t too bad of an alternative.

“Oi, Tsutomu, pass the marshmallows will you?” Tendou drawled lazily, yawning once the words left his lips. “I might fall asleep and tumble face-first into the bonfire with how slow you all are passing it around.”

Reon patted the middle blocker’s back tentatively. “There’s enough for everyone, Tendou.”

“Yeah, but he isn’t the most patient of senpais now is he?” Semi rolled his eyes, taking a bite out of the perfectly roasted marshmallow impaled on a stick.

“Say that to my face, Semisemi!”

As far as routine went, Tendou and Semi’s constant bickering was sporadic but strangely reassuring. Their animosity towards each other was one sign that his teammates weren’t as devastated with their unexpected defeat as Ushijima initially thought. Hell, the mere fact that the ace even agreed to toast marshmallows at the dormitory’s rooftop with all of them was probably grounds to assume he wasn’t as baffled either.

Ushijima felt as if he should feel more resentment—towards himself or Karasuno, he didn’t really know. But the familiar, light-hearted atmosphere that enclosed them all in front of the crackling flame Shirabu and Soekawa had set up earlier let the tension in his shoulders ebb away for the first time since they lost a week ago. The autumn breeze caressed his face in an almost comforting manner, too—as if to say it’s alright; you can rise back to your feet again.

When Tendou finally got his turn to sift through the bag of marshmallows, the ace carefully toasted his own evenly on all sides. The golden brown tinge on the treat certainly looked appetizing, and though he usually forgoes sweets since they disrupt his diet, Ushijima could afford to stray from routine every once in a while. But as he twisted the stick around to make sure he did a satisfying job, his eyes caught sight of the tiny letters scrawled on his index finger.

He paused in his ministrations, affixing the soul mark with an almost somber gaze. Along with Shiratorizawa’s untimely loss, Ushijima hadn’t forgotten that chance encounter with you in the hall just outside of the stands in the Sendai Gymnasium. It was an unforgettable sight, really—Niiyama’s most valuable player clamoring to reach him just before he and Tendou departed the venue, breath too ragged and eyes too hopeful.

Are you my soulmate?

The moment you showed him the soul mark etched onto your inner wrist was all the confirmation Ushijima needed. Your fates were predetermined to intertwine before you were even born, and that lasting belief of his where such bonds were nothing short of a farce was beginning to recede as the days passed idly by. He couldn’t get the sight of your tear-glistened eyes as you clumsily excused yourself out of his mind; the way the radiance fled your face so quickly the moment he insisted you had the wrong person.

Olive eyes drifted off to the blanket of stars that hovered over him and his teammates. Looking back, Ushijima was quite certain that his adamance towards soulmate bonds wasn’t the only factor that drove him to lie so brazenly. Maybe it was because he couldn’t face you regardless of how the sight of you tied his stomach into knots and set his heart aflutter. He had the gall to say he’ll be seeing you at Nationals when he’s the one who’s going to be absent after all.

Maybe Oikawa wasn’t the only one who harbored worthless pride.

“Oh, Ushijima-san, your marshmallow is burnt,” Shirabu cautioned, nudging the ace’s shoulder lightly as he pointed at the charred marshmallow on the tip of his stick.

He sighed, internally chiding himself for getting lost in his own train of thought before promptly taking a bite out of his newly crunchy treat.

***

“(Surname)!”

You paused mid-sip from your water bottle to cast a questioning glance over your shoulder. Coach Suzuki had that look on her face that foretold a thorough scolding, causing a shiver to run down your spine.

“What’d you do this time, senpai?” Amanai snickered, plopping herself onto the floor.

“I don’t think I want to know,” you grumbled, setting down the water bottle before getting up on your feet. You strode over to where your coach stood with folded arms at a leisurely pace, delaying your demise for a few more seconds. But once you were standing right in front of her, the first thing she asked you was—

“What sport are you playing, (Surname)?”

The question had you blinking at her, confused. Her tone carried such a sincere ring to it, too, so you weren’t sure if she’s messing around or not. Nonetheless, you answered, “Volleyball,” with an equal amount of sobriety.

Coach Suzuki nodded slowly. “Yes, yes. Volleyball. Now, may I ask you what kinds of apparel and gear are allowed on court?”

Your body went frigid in the next preceding moment, gulping nervously when you understood what she was being so strident about. “U-um, knee pads, knee braces, and…padded arm sleeves?” You pitched in a wobbly smile at that last part, hoping she’d let this slide.

“Padded arm sleeves,” she echoed, her narrow-eyed gaze shifting onto the black wrist band you still stubbornly wore despite Mei’s countless protests. “You’ve never really used any gear apart from your knee pads. I remember you specifically telling me that arm sleeves and arm bands were uncomfortable and disrupted your rhythm.” The coach flashed you a grin that sent a jolt of fear skidding across your skin. “Now, pray tell, why are you wearing a wrist band, of all things? Those don’t count as volleyball gear, as far as I can recall.”

“N-no reason,” you stammered.

“Oh, so the reason for your poor performance these past few weeks is also non-existent, I presume? (Surname), Nationals is a month away, and instead of improving, you’re regressing.”

If looks could kill, you would’ve been six feet underground with the way Coach Suzuki was glowering at you. Outside of the court, she’s definitely one of the kindest adults you’ve met thus far. Not all coaches would get pork buns at a convenience store with her team. But otherwise, she’s more uptight than any of the male coaches you knew of and, if somebody were to ask what your one fear was, it would be a pissed off Niiyama Volleyball Club coach.

“Coach, (Name)’s been feeling sick lately,” Mei intruded just in time, patting your shoulder affectionately. “I can vouch for her.”

Coach Suzuki remained unfazed at Mei’s attempt at redeeming you, but sighed after a few moments of contemplative silence. “You’re running fifty laps around campus if she doesn’t snap out if it, Haruno.” With that, she tucked her clipboard under her arm before heading back to where she was previously seated. Once she was out of earshot, Mei heaved a relieved exhale, turning the both of you around before promptly dragging you to an unoccupied corner of the gym.

“(Name), is there something you’re not telling me?” she probed, worry creasing her features.

Your hands were clenched into tight fists, fingers digging slightly into your palms. How long has it been now? A month? Yes, that should be right. It’s been a month since your last rejection, and for some reason, it hit you harder than the rest.

Usually, it only took a few days or so of self-pity and you’d be back on your feet once again. But now, even if you weren’t specifically thinking of a certain olive-haired ace, melancholy sank its claws deep enough into you that it’s beginning to affect your performance in both volleyball and your own schoolwork. So much for moving onto better things.

When you didn’t answer, Mei raked her fingers in her light hair, sighing. “How can I help you when you won’t even tell me what’s wrong? It’s the soul mark, isn’t it? You’ve never wanted to actively cover it up as much as you do now—”

“I asked him.”

There’s a brief pause that lapsed in your conversation before Mei incredulously uttered, “What?”

“I asked Ushijima-san,” you began, breathing rather shakily, “if he was my soulmate.”

Being friends with Mei for years had its perks, and that included her being able to know what was going on without you explicitly disclosing all the details. Her eyes glinted with the realization and instead of responding with words, she engulfed you in a warm hug. You supposed it was obvious enough, too. You only become this sullen when you’ve made a wrong gamble after all.

“Promise me you won’t wear that silly thing anymore?” Mei pleaded.

“Fine.”

When practice ended and you’re left alone in the locker room with her, Mei asks if you had any plans for the night.

“No, not really. Why?” you spared her an inquisitive glance.

“I heard they already set up the Starlight Festival,” she intoned. “You want to detour for a while?”

You shrugged. “Sure.”

***

When Tendou had told him that his own soulmate bond was fairing much more smoothly than his, Ushijima didn’t think he was actually serious. The red-headed middle blocker joked about things about eighty percent of the time and Ushijima made it a habit not to believe everything that came out of his mouth. But the presence of a certain Tsukishima Kei in what was supposedly “roomies’ night”, as Tendou had dubbed it, was baffling in its own right.

“This could’ve been a double date if you didn’t chicken out, Wakatoshi-kun,” his roommate jeered as he slung an arm around his younger companion.

“Tendou-san, don’t act all high and might now.” Tsukishima simpered. “As far as I can recall, I was the one who confirmed this. All you did was sneak glances at me all throughout our game.”

“Ah, Kei-kun, I was merely testing the waters! Waiting to pounce in for the kill!” Tendou imitated a cat swinging its claws menacingly, earning their group of three a few questioning stares from the other passers-by, much to his companions’ chagrin.

Tsukishima wasn’t bad company at all, even if he was the one who managed to stuff Ushijima during their last match, and therefore a threat to his career. But given that he’s already made peace with the fact that Karasuno had defeated them fair and square, the ace let himself enjoy the young middle blocker’s company. Tsukishima Kei ran on the same wavelength as he did, but was definitely more reproachful with Tendou’s impertinent behavior.

When the blond came knocking on their dormitory earlier this evening, he informed Ushijima that they’d been seeing each other often during the past three weeks once the truth that they were soulmates finally sunk in with him. (That certainly explained the solitude Ushijima had in their room recently. And it also backed up the fact that Tendou always had a sleazy grin plastered on his face whenever he came back late in the evening.)

He may not have expressed any sort of explicit reaction, but the ace was happy for them. That little scuffle he had with Tendou about this soulmate matter almost seemed like it happened a lifetime ago.

As he tailed the both of them at a short distance, Ushijima stuffed his hands inside his jacket, eyes roving around the street they were traversing, his breath materializing in the chilly December air. Tendou hadn’t told either him or Tsukishima where he planned for them to go, saying it’d be better to see it with their own eyes. But with the abundance of people mulling about, carrying candied apples, goldfish in plastic bags, one preschooler even wore a Kabuki mask—Ushijima was starting to get a hint of their destination. There’s only one event in Sendai similar to festivals in the summer that was held this time of year after all.

***

“Ahh, this takoyaki is really the best!” you moaned in delight before shovelling another piece into your awaiting mouth.

Mei snickered beside you on the bench both of you occupied. “Who knew all it took was one trip to the Starlight Festival to get your spirits up.” She tossed her empty disposable plate into a nearby garbage bin before sighing. “It’s gotten pretty cold lately though, hasn’t it? I wish I brought a scarf.”

You could only grunt in agreement. Niiyama High required its students to enter and exit school premises wearing the prescribed uniform, regardless of any extra-curricular club activities like volleyball. The mid-thigh skirt offered no resistance to the cold brought upon by the winter, but at least you had the foresight to bring your track jacket with you. Poor Mei had nothing but the uniform blouse to shield her from the low temperature.

“It’s real pretty though, the festival,” Mei continued, her eyes marvelling around the hundreds of Christmas lights coiled around the trees planted on either side of the walkway. They were clustered close enough to each other that it cast a light orange glow on your skin and clothes, and for a moment, you felt a little warmer. Pedestrians crossed over intersections to sample some of the food stalls lined up neatly in front of you. Children scuffled about, carrying as many prizes won from the game booths that their small arms could hold. Lovers were tucked away in the other benches, basking in the radiant sight that was the Starlight Festival. A chorus of indecipherable chatter blended in your ears along with the city’s evening traffic. Strangely, the noise wasn’t at all bothersome. If anything, you were feeling quite pleased with the sounds of merriment all around you.

“I’m just going to grab a drink,” you informed your best friend, who busied herself with gawking at the scenery. “Don’t give up our seat, alright?”

“Fat chance,” she scoffed. “This seat’s perfect! I probably won’t be getting up ever. But don’t take too long, okay?”

You spared her a soft chuckle before slinging your gym bag across your shoulder to head off to where the vending machines were. Slinking past the other festival-goers was a little bothersome though, since most of them walked in groups. Eventually, you reached a part of the walkway that wasn’t as congested and, lo and behold, the vending machines gave off their own beautiful, fluorescent glow. You ran over to fall in line behind a tall figure that seemed to still be deciding what he wanted from the assortment of colored drinks and mineral water. Since you weren’t in a rush, you patiently waited for him to make up his mind.

“Wakatoshi-kun, I’ll have strawberry water! Kei-kun wants a Pepsi~”

That familiar, sing-song voice made your breath hitch. You heard it come from your vague right, but you’re too stunned to look in that direction—

“Oh? (Name)-chan is that you?”

The mention of your name made the man in front of you go visibly frigid. You whipped your head to the right, only to be met with Tendou grinning at you like a madman. Right next to him was…Tsukishima Kei? You couldn’t really fathom a reason why Karasuno’s MVP was hanging around with Shiratorizawa’s Guess Monster, but the latter’s presence only meant that the person before you was…

***

“(Surname)?” Ushijima had uttered before he could even stop himself.

You gazed up at the eyes with unmasked surprise, lips parted slightly as you took him in. “U-Ushijima-san, good evening. I didn’t expect to see you here.”

Neither did he. From the way he’d made your eyes glisten with tears the last time you saw each other, Ushijima simply didn’t have the heart to face you again. Not when he lied through the skin of his teeth. Not when he wasn’t ready to treat you with the same endearment Tendou showcased so naturally with Tsukishima.

At the corner of his eye, he could see his carmine-haired roommate whispering something to his partner’s ear before promptly walking towards the opposite direction, leaving Ushijima to deal with this encounter all on his own. The ace made sure to school his expression into neutrality, as he always had. But the lights from the trees that surrounded the area lit up your face in a way that made his heart rate pick up. The way you were looking at him so intensely didn’t help either.

“Are you perhaps with someone?” he inquired more to fill the silence than out of curiosity.

There was a moment’s delay before a reaction was incited from you. You blinked at him before sputtering, “O-oh! Yes. I’m with Mei-chan. I just meant to grab a drink before we head home…”

Ushijima made a noise of understanding before asking, “What is it you want then?”

Your brows knit together in momentary puzzlement, until his intention dawned on you. “Ushijima-san, you don’t have to pay for my drink. I-I have enough money anyways.”

“I believe I promised to return that favor back then at the Sendai Gym,” he reminded candidly. “Now, will you let me pay my dues?”

The surprise on your face took a while to ease, but you eventually acquiesce to Ushijima’s insisting words. “Well, it can’t be helped.” You laughed softly, folding your arms across your chest. “You don’t really seem like someone who’d take no for an answer anyway. I’ll take a bottle of water, Ushijima-san.”

He was all too eager to do as told.

***

When thick silence settled between the both of you once Ushijima handed you your drink, cheery holiday music could be heard streaming through speakers hidden from view. You leaned across one of the rails as you took a sip, the cold water rivalling the wintry air. You were vaguely aware of Ushijima’s eyes trained on your figure, but you didn’t make any moves that suggested you noticed him staring. Should you say something to him? What do you even tell someone who rejected you only a month ago when you run into him at the Starlight Festival? And did you really have to meet him by a vending machine again, of all places? Fate really was out to get you.

“Are you fairing well with training for Nationals?” Ushijima asked so suddenly you almost choked on your drink. Thankfully, you manage to contain your composure.

You let out a nervous sounding laugh. “Not exactly. I actually just got scolded by my coach earlier. Let’s just say I’ve been feeling a little out of it lately…”

From the steady scrutiny in his viridian eyes, something told you that he knew exactly what you were talking about.

***

The indistinct murmur of passers-by was muted in Ushijima’s ears when he caught wind of the possible reason behind your underperformance. If he’d known his actions thus far would only give you more problems than you had to begin with, the ace might have considered admitting what he truly was to you. Though he felt strongly against the notion of soulmate bonds, he wasn’t selfish. He wouldn’t choose his own belief knowing someone else’s well-being was at stake.

Resolving this whole thing was actually easier than he made it out to be. He knew that if he only showed you the sentence written on the skin of his finger, everything would be much, much easier. But whenever he considered the possibility of being with you, brief memories of his father and mother would flash across his mind—a cruel, but truthful reminder that nothing, not even soulmates, lasted for longer than they should.

He was afraid; he began to acknowledge this the moment he observed the shared, albeit reluctant, affection between Tendou and Tsukishima. All that was holding him back was the fear of something that wasn’t even sure to happen. Maybe if he owned up to the truth of your connection, you would outlast the odds that his parents were unfortunate to have.

Maybe…maybe you wouldn’t give up like they did.

Ushijima took in a deep breath, trying to clear away the haze of ambivalence that might cloud his judgement. When he turned to face you again, he’d already planned out his next course of action.

***

“Would you like to accompany me to the Fukuzawa Shrine to celebrate the coming of the new year?”

You had to do a double-take on that. Did Ushijima really just ask you to join him for a shrine visit for New Year’s? Was he really the same person who told you that you weren’t his soulmate? You must not have been discreet with the sheer confusion on your face because in the next moment, Ushijima cleared his throat, face flushed in what you wouldn’t like to think is embarrassment (even though it seemed that way).

“Of course, you’re not obligated to agree,” he supplied. “I simply thought it would be fitting to have a proper conversation about what transpired the last time we saw one another.”

“Why not talk about it now though?” you remarked dryly.

For a moment, his composure looked like it slipped—his eyes betraying a flash of anxiety you wouldn’t think Ushijima would ever let anyone see on him. But it’s gone just as quickly as it came. Perhaps it was a trick of the light?

“Didn’t you mention that Haruno was waiting for you?”

The reminder had your eyes widening like a doe caught in headlights. “Oh, shoot. Right. I’ve been gone for a while. Oh, man, she’s going to kill me,” you rambled to yourself before ducking your head into a curt bow. “Thank you for the drink, Ushijima-san. I’ll be off, and um.” There’s another pause in your words as you contemplated about his offer. He already confirmed that he wasn’t your soulmate—what’s there to talk about? But when your eyes latched onto his towering figure before you, you couldn’t help but feel drawn to him in an inexplicably infuriating sense. Your mind had already resigned itself to the fact that you’ve made a mistake. Ushijima wasn’t your soulmate. But your heart, your ever traitorous heart, still insisted the same thing it had a month ago. The compulsion was a lot fainter this time; less ferocious than the last, but more resounding.

It’s him.

“Yes,” you said, mouth twitching into a warm smile. “I’d love to come with you to the shrine.”

***

The days went by faster than they had in the weeks that preceded that fateful day at the festival. Ushijima wasn’t entirely certain whether or not that worked in his favor. On one hand, the promised meeting at the nearby shrine would come upon him faster—by extension, the much awaited conversation that acknowledged your soulmate bond. On the other hand, the quick transition of days didn’t give him enough time to steel himself for what’s to come.

He hasn’t told Tendou (or anyone for the matter) about his plans. His loud roommate possibly assumed he’s still in denial with the facts in front of him. For a while, Ushijima had still been caught in the dilemma he’s been suffering even after he secured a meeting with you once the new year rolled around. But once he realized that you had no means of confirming your true connection aside from asking around and hoping to get the answer you wanted, the ace began to rethink his beliefs.

It certainly wasn’t fair for you. He could only imagine what you went through with such a generic soul mark even before you formally met him. From what he’s seen for the past few months, you were the kind of person that hated to break face in front of anyone; a person that always smiled no matter the problems you were faced with. If you had anything that weighed on your chest, you probably won’t even consider talking it out with him—opting to keep your feelings to yourself.

And it’s for that reason why he invited you out here to the Fukuzawa Shrine in the first place.

“Good morning, Ushijima-san,” you greeted breathlessly once you arrived at the meeting place in front of the shrine.

He quirked an eyebrow at your disheveled appearance. You were far from late, yet it seemed as if you were in a hurry to get here. “Good morning, as well, (Surname). Have you eaten yet?”

For some reason, your cheeks tinged pink at his words. Or maybe it was because of the effort to catch your breath? Nonetheless, you replied with, “Yeah. I ate a piece of toast on the way. How about you?”

“Yes, I’ve had breakfast as well,” he affirmed. “Shall we fall in line, then?”

You nodded vigorously. “Yup!”

***

You were used to falling in line for shrine visits; your family did it every year, after all, so you found no issues with the long queue that greeted you first thing in January, too. Although, weaseling yourself out of your annual shrine visits with your family in exchange for going with Ushijima was a bit hard to achieve. You had told them you were going with Mei’s family this year, and her mother had no qualms with making up a fake alibi for you. Mrs. Haruno was certainly the enabler for all your mischief. Good thing your family visited a different shrine.

In this case, however, it wasn’t mischief. It was spending the first day of New Year’s with a man you may or may not have strong feelings for regardless of your current state.

Contrary to your expectations, Ushijima didn’t just stand idly by, waiting for the both of you to reach the end of the line. He would ask you about varying topics that ranged from volleyball to college to your favorite food. While he didn’t exactly carry out a continuous conversation, he seemed to speak up just before the silence became awkward. From what you’ve heard about him, Ushijima was said to be the kind of person who didn’t really engage in meaningless conversation and mostly kept to himself. Was he adding ‘to start actively participating in conversations’ to his New Year’s resolutions?

“Hey, isn’t that Ushiwaka?”

Raising an eyebrow, you looked around for the person that uttered Ushijima’s nickname. The people around you, however, seemed to be engrossed with their own business. But you thought maybe it wasn’t too unusual that people recognized your companion. Who didn’t know Ushijima Wakatoshi in Miyagi?

“What? Oh, right. That is him. But that’s Niiyama’s Gemini blocker right? What’s her name again?”

Your gaze flickered to Ushijima, wondering if he was hearing any of this. However, the ace had a thousand-yard stare fixed on the empty space in front of him—too lost in thought to notice that both of you were the topic of someone else’s conversation nearby.

“That’s (Surname). Michimiya told me she’s the one that kept stuffing her during the playoffs. I wonder what she’s doing with Ushiwaka though.”

“They’re dating. Prove me wrong.”

“Suga, it’s rude to assume that two people going to visit a shrine together at New Year’s are dating.”

“Let’s bet on it then.”

You turned around and finally saw a familiar group of three guys and one girl, probably the same age as you, a few steps just below you and Ushijima. When your gaze caught the silver-haired boy’s, his face paled before hiding behind another boy with a hairdo that reminded you of a samurai’s. The most reasonable looking guy out of the group heaved a long sigh. You decided to pretend not to notice, turning back to face front as the line moved steadily once more.

“She totally heard you!”

“Asahi-san, don’t be too loud.”

“Kiyoko-san, I’m right, aren’t I? They are so dating!”

As you listened in on their quirky conversation, you failed to notice that one of the stone steps jutted out unevenly across the surface. Your foot got caught in the protrusion, causing you to lose balance. A yelp made its way past your lips, but before you could make a fool of yourself in front of the rest of the people in line, Ushijima managed to catch you by the waist to prevent you from toppling over.

“Yes, they are definitely dating,” you overheard the feminine voice you assumed belonged to ‘Kiyoko-san’ agree.

***

It took another half hour before you and Ushijima reached the top of the shrine to ring the bell and say your prayers. The shrine seemed a lot more crowded than it had been in the previous years Ushijima had visited. After you nearly stumbled off balance in line earlier, you haven’t uttered a single word since. He wondered if it was rude of him to touch you so suddenly without your consent, but it was better than simply letting you fall, wasn’t it?

You let the ace lead you to where the omikuji fortunes were tied across a wall of steel rods reinforced by two traditional stone pillars. Ushijima gestured for you to pull out your fortune, but you insisted that both of you did it the same time. Relenting, he pulled out his own omikuji in sync with your own movements.

“Oh? I got great fortune,” you gasped. “What did you get, Ushijima-san?”

Ushijima stared at the piece of paper in his hands. “Half-fortune.”

You nodded solemnly. “I see. Oh, you mentioned wanting to talk, right?”

The ace grunted in affirmation, gesturing for you to follow him further into the shrine.

Most would often think of Fukuzawa Shrine as bland or dreary, since it didn’t look as grand as the other shrines in around Miyagi, but they could definitely boast about the traditional garden tucked away from an outsider’s view. A massive koi pond stretched across the expanse of the area, seemingly paved to form a loop that separated the garden with the shrine itself. Wooden bridges connected them from four directions, and Ushijima offered his hand once you approached one of the bridges.

Hesitantly, you placed your hand in his, and though the callouses of your palms surprised him, he reminded himself that you were just as devoted to volleyball as much as he was.

“So, what did you want to talk about, Ushijima-san?” You halted your strides in the middle of the bridge, gazing at the koi that swam swiftly below.

The image of his father’s sullen smile appeared in his mind; his mother preparing dinner for only two; and all the times he asked why the gods would put two people together only to separate them in the end. The half-fortune he’d drawn out didn’t ease his agitation either. Every doubt, every fear, every second-thought, Ushijima experienced hurtled themselves at him at the same time. He gritted his teeth in resistance, refusing to let him be swayed by non-existent fears. Just because they were real for his parents, didn’t mean they had to be real for him, too.

What was real was the warmth of your hand in his, the hopeful curiosity in your eyes, and the thing he was about to do next.

“Will you forgive me?” he murmured, tucking behind a strand of your hair behind your ear.

The subtle action made your face beet-red. “F-for what, Ushijima-san?”

With the same hand he used to push back your hair, he showed you the soul mark that has been there all his life, leaving behind all the prior inhibitions he’s harbored for far too long.

***

Man, I really like your balls.

The words were written in elegant script on Ushijima’s index finger, too small to notice if you didn’t know what you were looking for. You blinked, recalling the very moment you managed to gather enough courage to strike up Shiratorizawa’s captain in a conversation. About three heartbeats later, you let go of Ushijima’s hand to bury your face in your hands.

“(Surname)? What’s wrong?” was his first response to your sudden timidness.

Face aflame, you lowered your hands. “N-no. Nothing’s wrong. It’s just…that was really embarrassing. I’ve always known that those were my first words to you but seeing the actual mark in person? God…”

“You aren’t angry with me?” he asked incredulously, his mask of placidity falling apart to give way to an astonished expression.

“Why would I be ang—” At that moment, you realize that he actually lied to you that time when you asked during the playoffs. But for some reason, even if that was one of the most gut-wrenching rejections you’ve experienced, you couldn’t find it in yourself to resent him for it. You were right. It really was him all this time.

Without even thinking about it, you wrapped your arms around Ushijima’s broad shoulders and pulled him into an abrupt embrace. He momentarily strains against the gesture—implying he’s probably unused to such blatant affection—but he eventually let you bury yourself into the warmth of his jacket. You breathed in the musky scent that clung to his clothes, imprinting the aroma in your mind. This was your soulmate. You found him. You finally found him.

***

Ushijima wasn’t a fan of being touched out of nowhere. Sure, he’d support you when you lose your balance (which seemed often), but it was a different story when another person initiated the contact. The pet peeve was so bad that he nearly punched Tendou in the gut one time for hugging the ace when he had his back turned to him. When your arms enclosed around him, he hesitated out of reflex. Your respectful demeanor thus far made him think that invading another’s personal space was beyond you. But he supposed that when you’re finally united with your soulmate, knowing that he most definitely is your soulmate, this change in behavior was warranted.

His mouth curved into a gentle smile as he carded his fingers through your hair, pulling you as close to him as humanly possible.

Ushijima wasn’t a fan of being touched out of nowhere, but for you, he’d make an exception.

***

“Ushiwaka, (Surname)-san, hello!”

You immediately sprang apart from Ushijima at the sound of someone else’s voice acknowledging your presences. Ushijima cocked an eyebrow in confusion, turning his head towards the newcomers headed your way. It’s those four that were just talking about you earlier!

“Sawamura, Azumane, Sugawara,” the ace greeted each of them earnestly, but he seemed to be blanking off with the girl with glasses. Wait, were these perhaps the players from Karasuno? You wondered why they were so familiar.

“Shimizu,” she introduced, nodding her head minutely. “You must be (Surname)-san. I saw you at the awards’ ceremony. It’s a pleasure.”

Still unused to people recognizing you outside of school or the court, you could only stammer out a few words of thanks. That’s when you noticed that Ushijima had a strong arm wrapped loosely around your waist. But from the way he’s carrying the conversation so casually with the four of them, you assumed he didn’t even know he was doing it. A small smile rooted itself on your face, still unable to grasp the reality that’s before you.

“I’m really sorry for, you know, uh, ruining your plans to go to Nationals,” the boy who you presumed was Sawamura apologized sincerely.

Ushijima tilted his head to the side. “What ever are you talking about? I’ll most certainly be present at Nationals.”

“Huh?” you intoned, casting Ushijima an inquisitive stare. “Why?”

For the first time, a soft chuckle rumbled in the ace’s chest as he tentatively said—

“To watch my soulmate conquer the tournament, of course.”

***

Naturally, Tendou freaked out when Ushijima told him the news.

“You are now officially invited to our double dates,” he snickered triumphantly when the two of them were settled back in their dorm rooms after winter break. “Congratulations for graduating from being a third wheel, Wakatoshi-kun~”

Ushijima raised his index finger into view. What used to be a strange scribble of first words now served as a constant reminder of a relationship that’s yet to bloom. He couldn’t quite tell if he ‘loves’ you the way Tendou claimed to love his soulmate, but he supposed he’ll get there. Though that half-fortune omikuji still bothered him ever since both of you left the shrine this morning, Ushijima was uncharacteristically optimistic for what the new year had in store for him. Even if he already used up half of the predicted fortune for him all on telling you he was your soulmate, he didn’t particularly mind.

He’s more than willing to face life’s misfortunes. As long as you were by his side, everything would fall to place in time.

***

← Part One

← Part Two

[jawnjendes]

you lost a part of your existence | shawn mendes

...in the war against yourself

chapter 9/?, university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: i hope this is as angsty as yall wanted. i read this way too many times to make sure its good n stuff. i hope it rly is. pls pls let me know what u think. blease.

masterlist | playlist

August 9

She never wanted him to stay asleep so bad in her life.

Shawn had an unexpected early start to the day. He got a call from his boss at six in the morning and had to deliver some massive flower arrangements to a wedding venue, even though he had the day off due to the birthday shenanigans that happened the night before. Still, he went and came back around noon, when Annalise was up and running. Shawn went down for a nap in the room, even more exhausted than normal.

Annalise was already on the couch, trying to enjoy her day off. She really didn’t want to catch up on the sleep she missed from helping Shawn through his nightmares all night. She knew she would have to stay awake now, knowing that he was inevitably going to fall into the dark place again. Annalise decided to catch up with Bella Santiago and her strange white background on YouTube. Naturally, remaining still on the couch for an extended period of time caused her to doze off.

Two things woke her up some time later. The first was a deep, uncomfortable pit in her stomach that really wanted to get out. She felt it in her throat, and she wiggled her toes to keep it at bay. Her mind began to race like it was second nature; What did I eat? What didn’t I eat? Did I have too much food last night or not enough? Do I have to cut pasta out of my diet now? Did I forget to eat with my birth control? Am I gonna vomit blood? Am I gonna end up in the hospital and have even more surgery? Am I gonna survive this?

The other thing was a distressed sound coming from the bedroom. Annalise tightly gripped the hem of her t-shirt, willing herself to not be sick on the couch. Every one of her senses were amped up in this state, so hearing short, little screams every few seconds only agitated her more. Why did this have to happen now?

“I’ll be just fine,” she whispered as she slowly moved to get up from the couch. “I’ll be just fine…”

Another yell came from the room, and she was not fine at all. As soon as she was on her feet, Annalise felt her stomach flip, and then she was running into the bedroom, where the closest bathroom was. Didn’t even look at Shawn’s convulsing body. Just went straight to the bathroom and slammed the door. She made it to the toilet in time, holding her hand over her still fragile incisions.

The real kicker? She heaved and retched and sobbed, but nothing came out. The horrid sensation of vomiting kept coming, but nothing was being ejected from her body. Annalise shook her head between upchucks, tears staining her cheeks. Why was this still happening?

Shawn woke up due to the loud slam, but his mind and body were still in the nightmare zone. His forehead was beaded with cold sweat, and his jaw was chattering uncontrollably. He could hear his own breathing directly in his ears, like some creepy form of ASMR. Not knowing what else to do, Shawn repeatedly smacked his cheeks like he was still trying to wake himself up. That awful retching could still be heard, his dreams were never this vivid. I’m safe. I’m alive. She’s safe. She’s alive.

Suddenly, he sat up, eyes frantically scanning the room. Who the hell is vomiting so loud? It's really fucking sunny today.

He wiped the sweat off his brow and then rubbed at his arms, wanting to jump out of his skin. He wanted this to be over already. He wanted to breathe again.

“Ann?” he called softly, his voice shaking. “Help me…”

Just as he said those words, he wanted to swallow them. Panicked as he was, Shawn was finally able to figure out that the vomiting sounds were from Ann. He scrambled out of bed and went to the bathroom door, anxiously jiggling the knob. It was locked, and it only sent another shot of fear through his chest. Not to mention, the vomiting sounds had stopped, and it was quiet for an uncomfortable amount of time.

“A-Ann?” Don’t do this, she needs you. “Ann, please…” Chill out, man.

Breathing short, Shawn slid down to his knees, leaning against the door. Tears blurred his vision as he stared at the crack at the bottom of the door. He saw a flash of blood seeping out of there from his dreams, and he punched the wall next to the doorway. He tried to find his way back to earth. He breathed the way the therapist told him to, he whispered the calming mantras, he pinched the pressure point in his hand. No matter what he did, he couldn’t shake this god awful feeling.

“Please, please…” he cried, weakly banging on the door. “Can’t breathe… Help me…”

Little did he know, Annalise was sitting on the other side of the door, knees to her chest. Now that she wasn’t distracted by her own shitty digestive tract, her mind spiraled even more. She knew she had to pull herself together long enough to help Shawn, but it never felt so impossible. How could she comfort him when she was the one who caused all this emotional turmoil? How could she break him and put him back together at the same time?

“I’m a strong lady, I’m a strong lady, I’m a strong lady,” she whispered between soft little sobs.

Why is this still happening to me? I want it to be over.

Present day.

Annalise felt an uncomfortable chill go down her spine as she recalled that afternoon. To think the following day, she proposed the idea of the separation. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Then again, she didn’t know it was going to blow up in her face like this.

She kept scrolling through Instagram as she sat on the floor in the corridor, just outside Shawn’s apartment. She looked at all the pictures and stories from his gig, and noticed how much he was glowing. When he was on stage, he was completely in his element. You wouldn’t be able to tell all the crap his girlfriend dumped on him.

It was almost midnight, and Shawn had told her he would be back by eleven thirty. This is what she gets for trusting men, she sits outside their homes looking fucking stupid. Annalise sighed and picked herself up off the floor just as she heard the staircase door open at the end of the corridor. It’s always right before she decides to leave.

Shawn was surprised to see her as he walked down the hall. He set down his guitar case when he reached the door, giving her a look. “You’re here.”

“I’ve been here for half an hour,” she told him, turning her phone over in her hand repeatedly.

“Sorry.” He pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. “Come on.”

The tension heightened tenfold as they entered the spacious apartment. Even when Shawn set his case aside to pick up Henry the cat from the kitchen counter, it never faltered. They went into the living room, where Shawn placed Henry on the giant cat condo in the corner by the screen door. That was new.

“You know I’m always honest with you,” he spoke, though he kept his back to Annalise, who had taken a seat on the couch.

“Yeah…” she trailed off, her stomach in knots. She watched him scratch Henry’s chin, wondering what the fuck was about to happen.

Shawn finally turned to her and sat on the other end of the L shaped couch. “So, you should know Alessia hit on me-”

“I know,” Annalise said coldly as she folded her arms. “I found out from her.”

Unfazed by the attitude, he continued. “No, I mean, she did it again a couple of days ago. And to be very real with you - apart from the gig I just performed - it was the highlight of my week.”

It was like being sucker punched with a frying pan. She had her mouth open like she wanted to say something, but everything she wanted to say was getting mushed up in one big angry ball.

“Now, before you freak out,” Shawn went on, “I’m telling you this so you know what exactly this separation is doing, and how bad I want it to end. I know we’re not broken up, and I will stay faithful to you, but I feel like I’m single.”

“That’s how you tell me you wanna be with me? By telling me you liked someone else’s flirting?” Annalise asked in disbelief. “So you don’t want me, you want someone.”

“I want you, Ann. And I want nothing more than to go back to the way we were.”

“You said you’re always honest.”

“I am. I don’t want to break up, but I don’t know if you feel the same way. How long more are you gonna keep this up? Everyone and their mother are fucking tired of this separation thing! I’m tired of the two week check ins, and I’m tired of wondering what you’re going to do next!”

Annalise scoffed. “You can’t still want to be with me knowing there’s other girls who want you.”

“It’s only one, Ann.”

“But you liked her advances.”

“Because the girl I love is pushing me away!” he snapped, now irritated.

She glared at him. Was that supposed to be charming? Was that supposed to reel her back in? Annalise sat up in her seat and leaned towards him. “A guy hit on me too, and you know what I did? I broke his fucking nose.”

Shawn put his hands up, confused. “You want me to break Alessia’s nose?”

“No, but I will if she-”

“Okay, okay! You’re going too far now.”

There was a pause. Annalise took a breath to cool herself down, but she still felt like she needed to yell. There was something on the tip of her tongue that she needed to talk about. She tried to remember, but the rumbling in her stomach made itself known.

Shawn noticed the sound and tilted his head. It threw him off so much he lost the angry tone. “Are… are you hungry?”

“It doesn’t matter,” she replied. “It’s after midnight, I can’t eat anyway.”

“When was the last time you ate?” he asked her.

“That’s not what we’re talking about right now.”

“You know you can’t be skipping meals.”

“Stop!” Annalise snapped, her throat suddenly tight and burning. “Don’t worry about me. Don’t scare yourself like that.”

Shawn gave her a look. Then he scooted a cushion closer. “I’m not scared.” When the silence threatened to persist, he asked, “Are you?”

Now she remembered what she wanted to talk about. She changed the subject. “You told Alessia about my health problems.”

The silence came back. Shawn looked down, trying to find the words to say. “If you heard the conversation we were having, you would understand why-”

“No,” she said firmly. “I could understand if it was just the hospital stay, but you told her everything. You told her about my anxiety with food, and you told her my calming mantra, and she threw it back in my face that night at the bar.”

“Okay, I didn’t know she would do that. If I had known, I wouldn’t have said anything at all.”

“You weren’t supposed to say anything to begin with! That wasn’t your thing to tell! I thought I could trust you, but you tell her my business and you let her stick around even though she clearly has feelings for you. How am I supposed to trust you?”

Shawn sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. He knew she had a point, but he was still frustrated. “I’m sorry I told Alessia, but she’s not a bad person. She had a lot to drink that night, I’m sure she didn’t mean it.”

Needless to say, it didn't do any good. Annalise felt herself go red in the face. “Why are you still defending her? Do you have feelings for her?”

“No!”

“So why have you been so quiet this week? You haven’t texted me at all.”

He chuckled, clearly annoyed. “Now you care about that?”

“Answer the question,” she deadpanned.

Shawn scooted a little closer and sighed. “You never answered my texts to begin with, so I stopped sending them. No use talking to a wall.”

That stung a little.

“So you do like her?” she asked.

“I told you no! How do you - Why -” Shawn cut himself off, rubbing his temples. He was really reaching his limit here.

And so was Annalise. “She hits on you, and brags about it to me. Even when I’m nice enough to give her my bed, she leaves so I don’t see her in the morning. That sounds like someone who’s hiding something!”

“Ann, she was embarrassed because she had too much to drink! Why do you always think everyone’s out to get you?” Shawn asked. Nearly there.

“She’s not out to get me, she clearly wants you! I’ve given her plenty of chances! I defended her in gaming club! I dragged her drunk ass back to campus! And then she goes and continues to flirt with you like she’s won you over! Did you even tell her to back off?”

“Of course I did!”

“You’re a liar!”

“And you’re fucking crazy!”

It was a split second of relief, allowing his pent up anger to truly seep out. But Shawn knew he said the wrong thing as soon as that second was over. He had never seen tears well up in her eyes so fast before. He wanted to take it back as soon as it came out, but Annalise was already standing up.

She decided, yeah, she is crazy. She didn’t choose it. She wasn’t always this way, but it’s how she is now. Her eyes looked down at the floor as the last words rang in her head. Heavy tears streamed down her face, but she didn’t even try to hide it.

Shawn stood up as well, much slower, watching her carefully. “Honey-”

“Don’t!” Annalise raised her voice. Her head shot up, a crazed look in her eyes. “You do not get to call me that! He doesn’t get to call me that, and she doesn’t-” She paused, her voice breaking.

“I’m sorry-” Shawn tried to say.

“That’s all I am to you, right? I’m just some crazy chick you’re seeing, huh?" Her eyes were furious, but so, so sad at the same time.

“No, of course not. It just slipped out, I-”

“If you let it slip, then you were thinking about it! You think I’m crazy too!”

“Ann, please…” Shawn reached his hand out, but she took a step back.

“I’ll break your nose too if I have to.”

"I didn't mean it!" he tried again. "I didn't… Ann, I'm so sorry!"

She shook her head as she went for the door. However, when she opened it, she was face to face with Stella and Camila. The two girls had matching smiles that quickly faded upon seeing a teary-eyed Annalise. She pushed past them and fled the vicinity before anyone could even blink.

The two girls looked back, watching Annalise go, and then they turn to Shawn, who looked quite defeated.

Shawn forgot why Stella and Camila were here, and he really didn't care anymore. He made quick strides to follow Ann, but the girls blocked the doorway.

"What did you do?" Stella harshly asked. "Why was Ann crying?"

"Stay calm," Camila said, rubbing her shoulder. "Seriously though, what happened?"

Shawn was still staring out the door, hoping Ann would come back. Forget how pissed off he was this last week, he needed to make this right. He never intended to make her cry and run away. "I don't have time to explain-"

"If you made her cry," Stella said, "she's not gonna fucking talk to you. So you better tell us what you fucking did."

"We're here to help," Camila reassured.

Shawn ran his fingers through his hair, pacing back towards the living room, and the girls followed. Henry jumped down from the condo and walked between his legs, leaving little tufts of orange fur on his jeans.

"Oh my god, he does have a cat," Stella mumbled. Then she spoke directly to Shawn. "You got about five minutes before my allergies start acting up."

"And another five before Brian and Connor get here with the masses," Camila added. "So you better get talking."

They all took a seat on the couch. Too many things have happened in this room. Shawn took a deep breath.

"It's like she wants me to be cheating on her," he said. "She'll pull something out of thin air and use it to prove something that's not even happening!"

Camila tilted her head. "That's… that's just crazy."

"She was irrational?" Stella asked. Her harsh and defensive demeanor seemed to change.

"That's the word I should have used," Shawn glumly replied. "I told her she was crazy, and that's when she left."

"Well, I'm sure she said things she didn't mean, too. Just let her simmer down," Camila told him.

Stella was frowning, still in thought. Surely the wife/roommate had to have some insight on this fuckery.

"Anything you wanna add?" Shawn asked her. "Because I really don't know what to do now. I've never seen her so angry before, I didn't think she could be set off like that."

"Okay so," she began, sitting on the edge of her seat, "I know I don't talk about her business, because she doesn't want me to-"

"So it's not just me!" Shawn interrupted. "Why does she do that, it's so frustrating! I want people to know who my girlfriend is but she makes it so hard!"

Stella raised an eyebrow. "She makes it hard because people are really goddamn nosy. The way she dresses alone causes strangers to ask really invasive questions, not to mention she is - or was - is... linked to the most popular guy on campus and that's given her attention she never wanted. Imagine if they knew she was on Prozac, which brings me to the theory I was going to make before I was interrupted."

"Sorry," Shawn mumbled.

"Like I was saying, it's her business, but her mental health is important. I could be wrong, but she might be off her meds."

The other two only stared. Could this really be the only explanation?

"How do you know?" Camila asked.

"I don't. But I always hear her pill bottle rattling in the morning," Stella explained. "And now that I think about it, I don't remember the last time I heard it."

"Is there a way you can find out?" Shawn asked. "Can you ask her?"

Stella chuckled in disbelief. "You really think she would answer honestly?"

"What about searching her room?" Camila suggested. "Like, when she's not there."

"Ooh, please?" Shawn put his hands together, looking at Stella. "I need to know if that's why she's so pissed at me!"

She gave him a look. "Dude, she's genuinely angry at you. I mean, you called her crazy. Why the hell would you do that? Besides, it's not that I'm worried about."

Shawn was about to ask to elaborate, but there was a knock on the door followed by several voices out in the corridor.

"I'll make it fast," Stella said. "You two should be close because of the hospital thing, but instead she's pushing you away. She's not excited for Halloween, I'm gonna have to force her into a costume. She skipped game club, and I haven't seen her do any school work lately. And I'm willing to be she's not doing so well at work either.  The last time she was like this, she was going through that break up with that asshole Luca, and I know you're nothing like that guy."

______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @poppyshawn @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @yourdeflightfullyleft @shawmndes @calyumthomas @havethetimeeofyourlifee @wronglanemendes @chillingbythesea @softmendesss @someoneunimportantxx

[connor-murphy-trash]

hi can i blease have some modern au Race hcs? idc what i just love him

AN: Hi guys! I am so sorry this has been in my inbox for forever. I’m not sure if this is even coherent at this point because I wrote to over the course of two weeks because I couldn’t focus on it. So I don’t know how this came out. But I hope you enjoy it anyways!

TW: Being sick, talks about an orphanage

Word Count: 1,733

Genre: Fluff

You were the new kid in school

It was your first week there

You would always ride the bus

Your parents used the only car your family had so they could go to work

Of course, the bus you rode was always the last one to show up

So you would hang around just people watching or working on some homework or something

But you were stuck on a question for your bio homework

Then you spotted someone across the room who was in the same class as you

So you went to ask him for help

You walked over to him

And he was sitting with a bunch of other boys

Who you assumed were all friends because they seemed to always ride the same bus and hang out together at lunch

You introduced yourself to him

And he said his name was Elmer

He walked you back to the bench you were originally sitting on

And helped you with the question

Once it was done

You thanked him

And started talking

His bus was about to pull up so you quickly exchanged numbers so if you had any more questions about the homework he could help you

Soon after Elmer’s bus left

Yours arrived

Later that night you and Elmer started talking again

Just getting to know each other

You told him how nice it was to have someone to talk with

Considering you hadn’t made any new friends at the school yet

So Elmer invited you to sit with him and some of his other friends at lunch the next day

You agreed to do so

So the next day you met his friends

And there were a LOT of them

Luckily you got on quite well with them all

You aren’t going to lie tho

It was kinda intimidating

There were just so many of them to keep track of

Then you asked how they all had met

In the most casual way, you had ever heard

Albert said that they all lived at the same orphanage

You were slightly shocked by this

You just didn’t expect it

But you accepted it and moved on with the conversation

The boy nicknamed Finch was telling you about how good his aim with a slingshot is

When a VERY attractive blond boy sat in the only empty seat left at the table

Which just so happened to be right next to you

“Are you guys trying to replace me with some new kid?”

He gasped and made an overdramatic hurt expression

Which made you laugh a little

Hearing you laugh made the boy smile slightly

You introduced yourself and he said  he went by the name Racetrack Higgins

Race for short

“Well it’s very nice to meet you ‘Race for Short’”

It was his turn to laugh at your joke

“I like them, Jack can we keep them?”

Jack seemed like he was the main person in charge

All of the other boys seemed to look up to him and respect his decisions

So when Race asked this

Everyone’s attention turned to Jack

“I suppose if they want to stick around, they can”

The boys were very happy about this

It was surprising to have so much praise just because Jack said you could stay

You guess then that’s a big deal

They even add you to their group chat

Which you imagine is going to be constantly blowing up your phone

But it’s okay

Because you finally made some friends!

A few weeks later, you were fully part of their group

You got a chance to message and talk with each of them individually

And you loved them all

But you loved Race the most

As in

You developed a slight crush on him

But you weren’t going to act on those feelings

You just barely became friends with everyone

You weren’t going to ruin that all because you had a crush

Everything was going amazing with your new group of friends

You were super close to Elmer, Jojo, Mush, and Davey

But you loved all of the boys

And girls

Jack was officially dating Katherine Plummer

Apparently, he had been pining over her for a while

So it was kinda a big deal

Also Davey’s sister, Sarah, recently started hanging out with you guys too

It was nice to have some gal pals and not be stuck with the boys all the time

One day you had to stay home from school because you were sick

You normally would have the first period with Jojo, Specs, and Race

So when both you and Race didn’t show up

Specs asked if you were out for the day in the group chat

He said that Race was home sick too

You weren’t the closest with Race

Because you didn’t want your feelings for him to grow and ruin your chance in the whole friend group

So when he texted you privately

And asked how you were doing

It threw you off a little

But you did have to admit

It was nice knowing he cared about you

You told him about how you weren’t feeling well

You had a fever and could barely breathe and had a bad cough

Basically, you had a really bad cold

And apparently, Race had one too

Just not quite as bad as you

You couldn’t really do much but lay in bed

Whereas Race just had a stuffy nose and a bit of a cough

So he offered to come over to your house and keep you company

Also to take care of you because both of your parents were going to be at work all day

You tried to make up an excuse because you didn’t want your crush to see you when you were this gross and sick

But your foggy brain couldn’t think of any good ones

So you reluctantly agreed

Race got to your house about a half hour later

Despite it being a ten-minute drive from the orphanage to your house

When Race showed up

He had a shopping bag filled with things

Simple snacks like crackers, cheerios, Sprite, etc

And a few things to entertain you both like movies and playing cards

You were not expecting all of that

But it was sweet nonetheless

You guys played a few rounds of go fish

Because that’s all you could handle mentally at the moment

And afterward, you were exhausted

Having no energy sucks

But Race didn’t want you to push yourself

So he offered to put on a movie

He apparently brought a bunch of Disney and Pixar movies

And he had you choose which one to watch first

You chose Tangled

He put it into your computer and set it up to play on your TV

Then he sat next to you on your bed

His back up against your headboard

Sitting on top of the blankets

You were laying underneath them curled into a ball

“You can lay down with me Race, it’s okay”

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I’m okay right here.”

“Race you are sick too. I’m telling you to lay down, you don’t have a choice.”

So he scooted down so he was laying

Still on top of the blankets

“Get your ass under here Race. You are going to get cold.”

“Are you sure, Y/N?”

He was so nervous about making you feel weird

It was cute

But you told him to get under the blankets

So he did

And he stayed on his side of the bed

Eventually, you started to drift into sleep

As you were only half asleep you said you were cold

And you cuddled into Races side

You put your head onto his chest

And wrapped an arm around his middle

“Is this okay?” you mumbled

Even tho you were half asleep and didn’t really know what you were doing you still asked

That made him blush a little

He said it was okay

Then he slowly wrapped his arms around you

As if he was protecting you from the outside world

He repeated your question to make sure you were comfortable with it

All he got in response was a slight head nod and a small hum of approval

And you snuggling even closer to him

Now he was really blushing

He was glad your eyes were closed so you couldn’t see it

Or the small smile that was forming on his face

Soon you drifted off into a peaceful dreamland

Race stayed awake for a little while just watching the movie

And making sure you slept peacefully

But eventually, the wear of the day mixed with the fact that he was also ill got to him

And he too drifted off into a peaceful slumber with you in his arms

Right where you belonged

Once school ended Sarah and Davey came over to your house to check on you

They had texted you earlier in the day to make sure that was okay

They let themselves into your house

And went up to your bedroom

Their jaws dropped when they saw you and Race cuddled up sleeping

Sarah immediately took out her phone and snapped a pic of you two

They decided you looked well taken care of

So they left a note on your desk and went home

About 20 mins later both your phone and Races were blowing up and awoke you from your peaceful slumber

You both checked your phone and the group chat was freaking out

You scroll up to the top of the new messages

NEW TEXT FROM: Sar Bear💖🐻

“Davey and I went to check on you two, but you seemed to be doing just fine without us 😉😍”

*insert picture of you and Race cuddled up with a Disney movie in the background*

All of the boys were hounding on you two in the chat

Sending heart eyes, key smashes, and “I SHIP IT"’s

Also some “I called it!” and “Use protection”’s

When you saw all this you were so embarrassed

You wanted to hide away forever

But before you could pull away from the cuddling position you were in with Race

He held you even tighter to his body

And gave you a small kiss on your forehead

Maybe getting tested wasn’t going to be too bad

As long as you had Race right by your side

[faelapis]

my wishes for “change your mind”

it seems pretty obvious at this point that the show will continue well beyond this season, but one thing that’s been on my mind for a while is whether the crew knew they would get more seasons at time of writing. 

what i’m really asking is - if they didn’t know, then that gives them a very good reason to heal the corrupted gems right now. 

it would also make complete sense with the other occasion the show could have ended, from a season-renewal perspective: “ocean gem”, the season 1A finale. 

this episode has a natural end point. the identity of the corrupted gems is revealed, they are given hope through steven promising to heal them one day. the town is saved. lapis is freed and disappears into space, and the series really has no “villain” at this point. everyone has hope, and no one is truly left behind. 

obviously, there are things that can (and should) be explored - all four core crystal gems have unresolved issues, but there is a sense of unity between them, despite the events. when an uncomfortable truth is revealed, that helps steven’s resolve to mature and devote himself to helping others. 

it wouldn’t have been a perfectly satisfying finale, but hey, that wasn’t for the crew to decide back then. what matters, on a thematic level, is that there is an attempt to give some hope to everyone. 

i wonder if the same mentality will present itself in "change your mind”.

there are still plenty of things that can be explored in later seasons, but if i were to let my own “instant gratification monkey” go hog-wild and give it whatever it wanted Right Now, to make the potential ending satisfying... 

i would ask for three things. i’ll let my inner child speak directly to you:

1. BLEASE heal the corrupted gems. i need it. i want Jasper. i want her Now. i Love her. its been So Long i Want JaspeR i also want nephrite i lov her but mostly jPSPer R 

2. give white diamond some depth... i want steben to Reach Deep and find why shes scared of losing control :o Was She The First Gem? Experts Are Divided. give her one (1) person who Gets It even if they disagree or hate her. tell mom she can Chill and yeah her system sucked but she doesn’t Have to control everyone. its Ok. they’ll survive on their own, even if it felt like pink couldn’t handle herself. that might be how she ~metaphorically~ feels about All Gems. 

3. hhhhhreference everyone else blease. want to see the zircons. and topaz and aqua. fwee the human zoo. fwee the off colors, let them be On Earth Today. ruby squad?? famethyst? jades?? hmm yes i like all of them. i want Hope. i want uhh Lars. and Emerald. teach me all the diamond secretssss i wanna see Connie’s Sword is bismuth gonna bring it? show me!!! OUTFITS.

thank you very much for listening to my inner child. he would be very happy, and feels that doing these things would be uhh... good. 

i would be happy with any one of the three, as long as it’s the first one. 

[mothric]

Blease give us an Aquaman review

yes let’s talk about The Little Mermaid 2.0 because oh boy

this movie tried so hard. it tried so, so hard. it tried so hard it broke itself under the weight of its own effort

“aquaman’s not just some NERD who loves ANIMALS, he’s a MAN’S MAN, he’s a MANLY MAN, look at his manly beard and the way his muscles ripple underneath his tats, you can smell the motorcycle grease rolling off him. also he can commune with whales teehee (: but MAKE NO MISTAKE HE IS A M A N” *electric guitar screech*

when half your movie needs to be told through flashbacks and drawn-out explanations of legend after legend and backstory after backstory, well, that’s just bad storytelling folks

the soundtrack shifted gears so often and rapidly that my neck still hurts from the tonal whiplash. i’ve never seen a movie try to be so many genres at once and miss the mark on all of them

two people a few seats away from us walked out halfway through the film and didn’t come back

we could also hear audible sighs from the audience every time a Romantic Scene™️ happened

*octopus plays the drums*  UNDAH DA SEA

*red-headed woman eats flowers bc she doesn’t understand the Surface World*  UNDAH DA SEA

*Big Crab rises from the deep and slaughters thousands* DARLING IT’S BETTA DOWN WHERE IT’S WETTA TAKE IT FROM M E  

is the king of Atlantis determined by who has the shiniest fork or by who can yell the loudest? unclear

this just in, scientists were wrong about the earth’s core, it is a perfectly inhabitable oasis, more at 11

is it my imagination or were all the Important Atlantians white while none of the blacksmiths who forged the magic trident were. do you know it is a distinctly uncomfortable experience watching several not-white men slaving away in less-than-ideal conditions to create a very valuable object that they then kneel and present to their royal white overlords. i’m not saying this was done on purpose i’m just saying maybe somebody should have thought this through 

didn’t know Mothman had such a hankering for fried fish

a lot of this film was actually very very pretty and Aesthetic, which makes it a shame everything else was so tacky

the half a minute of backstory on the rise and fall of Atlantis was way more interesting to me than anything else that happened, where can I see that movie

doggo was best and most believable character 10/10

I rate this movie a 2/10 for pretty much Everything but an 8/10 for the dog and how much @woppy42 and I laughed throughout. (mostly the dog tho)

[professor-spacecakes]

3: Ever had a terrible breakup?

I’ve never been in a proper romantic relationship, so none in that sense. I’ve had a really terrible friend break-up though. It’s a long story, so I’ll put it under Read More.

They’d approached me as a fan of one of my fanfictions and we ended up playing Overwatch together nearly every night. We got to be fast friends, and they even helped me start taking commissions for the first time, since they were an artist themselves.

Things were going okay for a while. They opened up to me and I tried my best to open up to them. They claimed to have a number of mental issues and I tried my best to be as supportive as humanly possible. I changed how I spoke for them, omitted certain words and even entire subjects from my vocabulary. I dropped everything and talked to them whenever they asked me to.

Unfortunately, they didn’t seem to afford me the same consideration. It started to unravel after I started streaming our Overwatch games for a while. We garnered a small following and decided to open up a Discord server for the fans. This friend of mine made it, since I barely knew how to use Discord at the time. After a little while, this friend grew uncomfortable with the discussions on the server and, without warning to anyone, just deleted it one night while I was asleep.

In the morning I found out about it from a post they’d made on tumblr that simply said they wouldn’t be joining in the streams anymore. I messaged them to ask what was wrong, and they said they decided dropping out of the streams was for their mental health and that they nuked the server. I remained calm, said it was okay, and merely stated that I would have liked for them to talk to me about it beforehand. They said “Why? This has nothing to do with you,” and I was just like… It kinda has everything to do with me? It was strange, since they had a habit of practically asking permission to do things when it had absolutely nothing to do with me. Honestly, looking back at it now, them saying that was probably a back-handed jab at me for saying they don’t need to consult with me on every little thing.

Anyway, that discussion sort of devolved into an argument. I said I was a little upset by what they’d done, because they always said I should let them know when they’ve done or said something to upset them, since they’d done that to me countless times. I’d always apologize profusely and promise never to do the thing again. This was the first time I’d gathered the courage to very calmly and politely raise my own concerns. Their response? “I’m sorry you feel that way.” This upset me even more, because it felt like they were putting the blame on me for being upset. I tried to explain this to them, again very calmly and politely, but they just started crying and said they don’t understand. I tried for hours to explain myself, because I was determined to actually stand up for myself for once and not to wimp out and bow my head like usual, but they were incapable of seeing someone else’s perspective on anything.

At this point, I didn’t know what to do. I asked a mutual friend of ours for advice, and they suggested we get into a group call together. It ended up with both of them ganging up on me, because of course I’m the mean one for making the one friend cry, even though they turn on the water works for everything. I mean literally everything. Then they tried to use the excuse that they were saying that to make me angry, thinking that I wouldn’t be sad anymore if I was mad for a second, because that’s apparently how they worked. I explained that’s not at all how I worked, and they were just like “oops lol” and went back to talking like nothing ever happened and never apologizing, despite the fact that I was still upset.

Rather than stream without them, because I knew playing Overwatch without them would upset them despite them being the one that didn’t want to do it anymore, I just quit streaming altogether to devote all of my game time to them.

Things kinda started to unravel after that. I once shared a video of a comedian whom I wasn’t aware they happened to despise, and even though I profusely apologized and promised not to share his videos with them anymore, they continued to hold that up as a counter every time they shared something with me that I didn’t care for, like watching that one video was the equivalent of donating a kidney to me and I owed it to them to watch and discuss stuff I didn’t like.

My depression got super bad in the months that followed, to the point where I could barely muster the energy to think. This friend kept messaging me everyday, and I really tried my best to reply to them as best I could, but all I could manage most of the time were one or two word responses. My brain was mush and I just felt so empty of everything. They kept hassling me to tell them what was wrong, and I did. I told them that I was in a bad spot with my depression and that I felt hollow. They just said they didn’t understand and, after the first thing they tried to do to cheer me up didn’t magically work, they got upset at me. I asked them what they wanted from me, and they said I wasn’t being “cheery” enough about my depression. “Gosh golly, [REDACTED], I’m just so darn depressed! Let’s just keep talking about things we like as though nothing’s wrong!” They literally wanted me to act that way. That’s what they said to me.

After that, I tried to adjust my sleep to stop staying up all night, and because of that I started missing our game sessions for a time. They assumed I was avoiding them. I wasn’t, I was genuinely sleeping. Then, any time I posted about anything in a negative light, they automatically assumed I was vagueing about them. I wasn’t, and despite telling them I wasn’t they started blatantly vagueing about me. I didn’t bother bringing it up. I knew I wouldn’t win that argument, and I didn’t have the energy for it.

Finally, again without any warning, I woke up one day to find that they’d unfriended and blocked me on all platforms, and created a new discord group for our Overwatch crew, only without me there. Despite all they’d done to that point, I wasn’t ready for our friendship to just be over like that. It sent my depression into full on suicidal mode. I made a few vaguely suicidal posts here on tumblr, and thankfully a lot of my followers jumped on that and sent me countless messages of support. They managed to calm me down before I did something stupid. You guys know who you are if you’ve stuck around since then. I legitimately owe you guys my life.

Unfortunately, and I know it was well-meaning, one of my followers that knew I was good friends with this person (but didn’t know they were the cause of me being so upset) contacted them and told them what was going on. So this person called me. On the phone. I’d like to emphasize this, because I don’t give my number to fucking anyone, but they’d pressured it out of me one day.

Anyway, they started off asking if my ringtone (”You Got The Touch” from the 80′s Transformers movie at the time) played when they called. I said it did and they said that made them happy. They then went on to talk about how they got complimented for a tote bag that I had sent them for Christmas, saying they thought that’d make me happy because I got it for them. I’d literally just recovered from a complete mental breakdown barely an hour before, so I was so completely exhausted that I could barely mumble out one-word responses.

So then they launch into this whole story about how they were suicidal before, except they were really gonna do it (implying I was just doing it for attention) but they randomly got a phone call from someone they never talk to that was also suicidal and that made them stop. Then they kinda sat there expecting me to thank them for being that person for me, but they weren’t, and it’s against my personal code of honor to lie to someone, even if it’s paying false compliments.

So then they started yelling at me, saying I was mean and selfish and an asshole and a genuinely bad person, ranting at me without letting me get a word in. Then they yelled at me for not getting angry. Then they they went back to trying to talk to me like nothing happened. I was too drained to say much, but I was still trying to cling to the friendship despite all that had happened, and tried to continue talking to them, afraid they’d never talk to me again if I hung up. Eventually I gave up and we ended the call and I went to bed.

In the morning I was a lot calmer and able to think more clearly. I sent a message to this person (having convinced them to unblock me the night before) and stated that we were clearly just people with personalities that naturally clashed, and that I didn’t expect them to try to be friends anymore. I was much more polite than I should have been.

I seethed internally for more than a year after that, the hate and rage and sadness for this former friend boiling endlessly inside me. There was literally not a day during that year that I didn’t think of them, and it was almost never in a kind way. I still get upset just thinking of them, and things I used to associate with them have sort of become triggers for me. I quit art for a year because they were an artist and I wanted to distance myself from them as much as possible. I avoid Transformers, a fandom I’d gotten them into to the point of them obsessing over it, particularly Rodimus. RoadRat now has an underlying bitterness to it. I flinch whenever I hear or read things they used to say constantly, like “heckin” or “blease” or using question marks in the middle of sentences that aren’t questions, or loud declarations of one’s homosexuality when they see something they like or are attracted to; unfortunate, as these are still quite common in today’s internet slang. I have a paranoid panic attack whenever I see anyone online with the word “Scrub” in their username. I’m automatically wary of anyone who has the same mental illness(es) as them because they always used that as an excuse for everything they did to me. I feel especially guilty about that one, but I can’t help it. They were sex-obsessed, so I’ve become repulsed by anyone talking to me or about me in a sexual manner. I automatically keep fans that approach me and try to become friends with me at arm’s length, because that’s how they came into my life. Because of that, I can count all of the friends I have on just one hand.

So yeah, that’s the story.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 8? IS IT 8 ALREAD- YEAH IT IS.

oh god its been 8 weeks already i dont like that these chapters reveal how much time im WASTING but c’est la vie as always lets put these assholes on blast:

moving SWIFTLY on!!!!!!!!!!!!

(also what do you mean ‘it’s the meat chapter’. wh. what meat. hello.)

She slumped back against uncomfortably warm stone, trying to tuck her feet back into the shade.

it’s a known fact that glynda is all Long all Angles and also a lot of Beef,

this is? the date, right? the date chapter? yes? all the chapters have been shuffled around i have NO sense of where i am because all thats happened for 7 chapters is ive been assaulted by lesbians but given the distant chanting of meat meat meat this must be the date.... right.........................................

OH THAT MEANS WE GET TO SEE CINDER’S DRESS NICE

Cinder’s smile flashed through Glynda’s mind, and she shifted against the stone wall, reaching for her Scroll.

my favourite thing is how whenever cinder and glynda think of each other its never not got crazy gay energy............. this is LITERALLY like the whole ‘i sleep next to a photo of my enemy’ deal!!!!!!!!!!! they’re both just attracted to dangerous (and also stupid) people, is the thing,

The Grimm swarmed, biting insects with snapping mandibles, their chitinous exoskeletons all scraping against one another with their constant, eager writhings.

YES thats some GOOD IMAGERY RIGHT THERE IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF UH-HUH

honestly i- OKAY LOOK I SAID IT BEFORE BUT I STAND BY HOW OFFAL HUNT IS SO VISCERAL... i love writing thats like............ kinda Uncomfy to imagine but also rly detailed and just rly digs into the gore and the grossness............ its GOOD CONTENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank god offal hunt just whaps u in the face w/ it like a damp sock,

we’re got a bit of slow start here which is a nice way to  slice the difference between earlier ‘gotta go fast’ glyn and this ‘actually i’m way out of my depth’ glyn. wow! i can BREATHE. and we havent had anything massively cheeky pop up yet which may be a new record all round

The ripples of its being reached Glynda with ease, consuming those of the smaller Grimm. It was dangerous. More dangerous by far, even out here among these ancient beasts.

mmmmmmmmmmm this is- okay slight spoilers but i presume this is hati? aka he who had like a handful of lines in the first version and was generally just... look hati was winner of The Most Vague award in the first version so i’m hoping its hati because i am CURIOUS ABT THIS BOY.................. who i coincidentally love. who is he? we’re not sure (yet) but i love him. its just a fact!

It wasn’t just consumption. It was desecration. Vile unmaking. The Grimm stripped away her flesh. Tasted of her marrow. Gorged itself on the gristle between her bones and peeled back her ribs to reveal the chasm within. It sucked the soul from her chest in a wash of red and agony that spanned centuries, each running over the raw meat of her like long, black claws—

I JUST LOVE THE WAY THIS SHIT GETS DESCRIBED ITS SO SATISFYING also i feel like there should be a tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiny fingerguns in here t e c h n i c a l l y but im not gonna cause its vague enough i can kiiiiiiiiiiiiiinda move on kinda slightly maybe

It felt like death itself had caught her in its massive maw, chilling her organs, reaching for the soul at the core of her.

OKAY FINE 👈😡👈

OKAY FINE YEAH THE REST OF THIS IS ALL CHEEKY FINGERGUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that said this is all RLY VITAL STORYTELLING and im rly glad we’ve got some expanded Glynda Lore because it was Lacking in the archived version... but now we’re full on until glynda backstory babey!!!!!!!! yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fear itself couldn’t touch her, and even as she thought this, she felt it drain away.

Her breathing slowed. Her body relaxed. Information trickled in, unburdened by emotion.

👈👈👈😡👈👈👈

glynda rly DOES only have half a braincell Huh

OKAY DATE TIME? DATE TIME? YES? MAYBE?????????????? god ive been looking forward to this stupid gay date for so long. EIGHT WEEKS. EIGHT.

A pause. “Are you familiar with the Hill of Roses Massacre?”

ah the return of the Plot (that Isnt The Gay Bit)

i was gonna Say A Thing, and then answered my own question, and then realised it’d be spoilers anyway. YAY SPOILERS! YAY NOT BEING ABLE 2 SAY ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so yeah theres a lot going on here dsdjhgf

“Well, it was your class, so.” She couldn’t help but smile at the memory.

/ticks off ‘anything to do w/ ozpin’ off the bingo card, again,

“I’m afraid it’s a bit more complicated than that, Glynda. With this meeting on the horizon… I fear I would cloud your judgement.”

oz i love u and yr cryptic bullshit but this will not the first Nor The Last Time glynda and i are both exasperated w/ u. please. blease.

Ozpin had never misled her before.

👈😂👈

“I’m only following orders.” Written with the same implication as a wink. “Now, is there anything else I can help you with, Professor?”

i fucking adore winter schnee i’d DIE for her

i may have to make a spoiler version of this later because theres Some Shit being said here and i DIRELY have to expand upon it but that will have 2 wait dskfjsdf

When they saw she was human, they waved her through without any trouble.

i still feel like im being targeted for my url!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U ASSHOLES,

As much as she could, Glynda tried to avoid the constant bump of shoulders and too-tight quarters. As large as she was, it was nearly impossible,

what did i say!!!!!!!!!!!!! we LOVE one beefy bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(im literally getting SO excited for the date reveal im VIBRATING)

She still didn’t have much of an idea what waited within, but she had quite a few reservations about using the front door.

me: knows whats coming also me: glynda please

As a Huntress who’d been trained in both subtlety and stealth, Glynda had a few ideas.

The next person who stepped outside was thrown roughly aside,

ME: GLYNDA PLEASE,

you have no idea how often im just. i have my face in my hands. glynda’s never heard of a repercussion in her life. cinder once saw the word ‘consequences’ and broke out into hives. im. where’s the thinking-

And then she noticed Cinder.

here comes the peak gay im so ready HERE IT COMES-

Her hair was tossed over one shoulder as always, but in place of her usual crimson dress, she wore black tonight. Dark fabric with but a hint of iridescent specks rippled around her ankles, rising up to stretch tight across her hips. It rose all the way to the hollow of her throat and was cut to be sleeveless, though Cinder wore gloves of the same material that rose nearly to her shoulders.

HERE IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my god u may know i drew a shitpost of this scene and now i Have to redraw it to be even Sexier!!!!!!!!!! also i know glynda could argue she’s being Observant but i also think, she’s a home of saxophone, and is gay,

LIKE ‘stretch tight across her hips’ WHY YA L O O K I N

Glass heels clicked over the dark stone floor as Cinder stopped right in front of Glynda, looking up at her from beneath lofty bangs. Gold eyes swept from the crown of Glynda’s head to the crop gripped so tightly in her hand—and then Cinder smiled.

there is No heterosexual explanation for this

Cinder clicked her tongue. “Well, now that you’re here, shall we?”

“Shall we…?”

“Glynda,” she chided, rolling her eyes. “Dinner, of course.”

IM LOSING MY MIND AAAAAAAAAAAAA THEY’RE LESBIANS HAROLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAROLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

okay. okay. this still isnt QUITE THE DATE CHAPTER BUT WE’RE RLY IN IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so scared that a whole chap has been saved for this meal because its going to be so long and charged w/ lesbian energy and its gonna kill me BUT OH WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway i loved it. the end.

[huangfilms]

Roommate!Jaemin

summary: so i found an eviction note on my door when i came home from a shift so i looked on a bulletin board in the lobby and i saw an ad for a roommate and that ad was from you, my really cute neighbor and i was wondering if that offer still stands???

requested by: a lovely anon ❤️ thanks for waiting patiently sweetheart !

(A/N) i have finished!!! thank you for waiting very patiently for this,,,,, i know i haven’t been on my A game recently but thanks for not rushing me JDJSJD anywho i love you thanks for requesting! ❤️ i hope u like this !!

it was midnight and you were absolutely slumped, stressed, and kind of angry

work really kicked your ass that night

working at a 24/7 diner sucked so much cause sometimes the people would come at odd times

and there were some snappy customers

that night during your shift there was a particularly rude customer that ruined your mood so you just really wanted to lay down in your bed

but once you go to your door you found an eviction note saying that they’re going to kick you out in a week if you don’t pay your rent

right then and there you could feel all of the stress from that day form into tears

so you open your door in a haste and c r y

because??? you don’t get payed until next week??? so you’re basically screwed

but you decide to try and sleep it off because you are way too tired for this and it’s your day off tomorrow anyway

when you wake up you forget about the eviction note but you remember when you go to make coffee since it’s sitting on the counter

you let out the Biggest Sigh ever

you leave the paper on the counter and then you go down to the lobby to see the bulletin board to see if there are any roommate papers or open apartments

when you look you see something

‘looking for a roommate! contact at +xxx-xxx-xxxx na jaemin’

and you recognize the name cause hey!!! that’s your neighbor!!!

you never really talked to him before, only the few nods of the head at each other when you see each other

he’s cute or whatever

anyway

you decide you’re going to ask jaemin if you could be his roommate cause that seems better than living on your own

smh rent is high these days what were you thinking of anyway HAHA

moving on though

you go back up and try to build up the courage to knock on his door

but you don’t even know if he’s home

you knock anyway, and about a few seconds later you can see jaemin’s bright smile

angels are singing

‘did you need something y/n?’

you get snapped out of your daze

‘uh i saw the ad of you needing a roommate, and i was wondering if that offer still stands??’

and he looks confused cause? you’re his neighbor w hat??

and you see the confused look so you start to explain to him that you just got an eviction note last night and you really don’t know where else to go 

your parent don’t live in the same country as you

your friends,,,,, uhhhh ??? very m i a i guess 

and you won’t get payed until next week so you start to really beg him to be his roommate

and he can see how stressed you are so he accepts

and you just give him such a big smile and he metaphorically melts to the ground

and you really don’t even have to pack anything the whole week you move your stuff into his apartment and get rid of a l o t of things

you just found out you were a hoarder LMAO

but anywho!! 

it takes a couple more days than planned to move everything into the other bedroom 

but it’s all good

so the day you finally moved everything into his apartment he asked if you guys wanted to go grocery shopping cause his your guys’ kitchen was empt y

but you declined cause you needed to fix and arrange some stuff in your new room

and hes all like no problem i’ll just ask a friend to go with me, i’ll see you in a few hours!! and he grins and locks the door

you didn’t even fix stuff you just knocked out cold onto your bed 

anyway fast forward it’s been a few days since you moved in

it’s been a lil awkward cause you guys don’t really interact with each other

your guys’ work schedules don’t match so hes always out when youre home and vice versa

so you never really get to talk with him

but!!! by some miracle your job/school schedules do match

and you guys FINALLY talk and break the VERY awkward tension

the dynamic in your house is so much better wow

sometimes when either of you couldn’t sleep you guys would venture out or just crash into the other’s room for the night

one time jaemin’s friend walked in on you guys cuddling in his bed cause he had a spare key

his friend (jeno) asked him about it a while later and jaemin was so blatant

‘oh we’re just friends’

‘mhm sure jan’

‘shut up jee-no’

so it’s been months now

(yes i time skipped sigh)

but anyway, jeno was still Skeptical cause?? friends don’t do all that couple stuff

literally everyone Been Knew you guys like each other except for:

oh right YOU GUYS.

you guys Flirt 25/8

even when its Not even necessary like when you’re hanging out with your friends

for example you’re having a movie night with the dreamies

‘jaemin sweetie can you get me something sweet’

and he nods and goes to the kitchen only to come back empty handed

and ur all like??? jaemin wheres My Snack

he just scoffs and goes ‘what are you talking about i’m literally right in front of you’

EVERYONE IN THE ROOM COLLECTIVELY GROAN S

bitch i would too the Fuck

you just snort and lightly push him on the shoulder before pulling him down to sit next to you

then on instinct he just wraps himself around you

everyone: confused

JDFHLASD 

but they don’t question you guys and just watch the movie

when you say you’re going to bed and leave the couch with a goodnight to them

jeno jumps onto the spot next to him

and he just goes ‘do you like them?????’

jaemin is so ??? cause wha t you’re just really close friends!!!!

jeno just looks him in the eyes and goes ‘not even a little bit??’

‘i’m sure’

and so jaemin just sits and thinks for a little though

cause hm,,,,, maybe he does like you-OH MY GOd HE LIKES YoU

and he has an internal breakdown cause oh my god???? what??? when???

not that there’s anything bad about you!!! he just,,, as cliche as it may sound

he doesn’t want to make anything awkward with you 

BUT ITS AWKWARD ANYWAY!!!

and so he decides: to take more shifts and study out at the library cause he doesn’t want to think about this

what he don’t know, is that you’re in your room thinking the s a m e thing blease talk to each other

so you!!! also take more shifts but you stay locked in your room as well

when the dreamies come over one day without a warning you’re both in your rooms just minding your own business

and so when they barge in they’re all like

????? where’s the couple?????

and so jaemin goes out and hes like oh why are you guys here LMAO

‘we wanted to watch movies?? it’s friday cmon go get y/n’

and so he just laughs a little awkwardly but he goes to you anyway

he knocks and goes ‘so uhhh the guys are here and we’re about to watch movies??? wanna hang out ??’ and in his head 

he’s just wondering when everything became so awkwar d

oh right when he realized that he likes you

but anywho you open the door and he does a little half smile that makes your stomach flip in a good way

and you smile at him too

when you guys go out though,,,,,

you sit on one end of the couch and jaemin sits on the opposite end

donghyuck sits in between the both of you

‘why aren’t you and jaemin sitting next to each other like usual????’ donghyuck asked you quietly to make sure no one else heard

cause He Knew

you just give him a side eye and you tell him ‘you already know why now Shut the movie is starting’

he leaves it be but in the middle of the movie he gets up to use the restroom

and then chenle says ‘move over i like sitting by the arm of the couch’

‘no just let me sit here’

chenle is just r eally confused ‘but you always sit next to jaemin b l e a s e y/n’

and thats how you two end up next to each other

jisung decides to squish in and so you’re pressed up against jaemin

you dont know who’s more uncomfortable : you or him

the room feels s o awkward and literally everyone feels it

and so you just ‘i’m gonna get something to drink anyone else want water???’

‘i’ll go with you’ and its jaemin standing up

‘i-i um no it’s oka-’

he just takes your hand and he leads you to the kitchen and behind the corner so they won’t see you guys

‘why are we being awkward??’

and you just shrug cause?? you guys literally haven’t talked for w e e k s you dumb bitc-

and he just goes is such a quiet voice

‘i miss you’

and your heart!!! palpitated!!! the hell!!!

‘i-i miss you too’

and so he just hugs you and says Really Confidently

‘i like you, be my baby’

and you !! are about to Faint! 

‘i-i,,,,i like you too’

and when you pull back he just ! kisses you really softly 

and you’re Red cause oh this is Really Happening Right Now

you guys walk back out of the kitchen (with the drinks) but you’re holding hands

you both are just :D

everyone knew what was happening cause you Guys Aren’t Quiet

just cause they can’t see you doesn’t mean they can’t hear you !!!!

and so they’re just like ‘congrats now shut the movie is still Playing’

you guys are So gross with each other 

everyone regrets everything

but anyway!!!

now that you guys are together!!! you guys smooch

you like to smooch his nose and he just laughs every time you do that

okay but when you study for smth you do it in your room cause he’s going to distract you

he still manages to do it

he sends you the Ugliest Texts

‘when u free bb 😳‘

‘we??? live??? together???’

okay but being serious!!!

he’s such a softie and he’s so happy that he gets to wake up next to you all the time

and ugh my heart! is hurting! 

since you guys live w each other its weird not seeing each other cause your schedules don’t match up sometimes

and jaemin is so :( 

and it makes you so :(

hes such a clingy one 

he flirts at all times of the day just to get a reaction out of you

but anyway

ugh roommate jaemin ! what a concept

there’s never a dull moment when it comes to him!!

Masterlist

[redvelvetreel]

Red Velvet Reel 6.1: Cele-BRAT-ion!

                      [Fic Directory]

Pairing: [Married] Spicyhoney (Underfell Papyrus x Underswap Papyrus)

Summary: Eight skeletons walking into a bar seems like the perfect setup for a joke. Too bad the punchline seems to have been Stretch's expectations of a fun little get-together with friends.But hey, what's a few baited taunts, stupid posturing, escalatory challenges, heated arguments, well-meaning scolding, clever puns, veiled threats, unnecessary bets, and borderline fights between cross-dimensional clones?

Characters: Edge (Underfell Papyrus) & Stretch (Underswap Papyrus) & Red (Underfell Sans) & Blue (Underswap Sans) & Classic (Undertale Papyrus) & Comic (Undertale Sans) & Slim/Puppy (Swapfell Papyrus) & Black (Swapfell Sans) & some poor random waitress lol. 

Contains: Mpreg/Skelepreg! Meeting up in a (sports) bar! Everyone talks a lot and never shuts up! (A little) Stupid Fellverse posturing and antagonism! Lots of headcanons! A little betting and drinking?

Rating: Teen and up! (I guess?)

Note:  Hah, a labor of love that I’m still not satisfied with but! Enjoy!

Underswap Papyrus – Stretch             Underswap Sans –  Blue Underfell Paprus – Edge                     Underfell Sans – Red Swapfell Papyrus – Slim/Puppy          Swapfell Sans – Black Undertale Papyrus – Classic              Undertale Sans – Comic

Stretch squinted into dimly lit bar, past the dancers that seemed to be having an increasingly good time, “Yeah, I don’t see them-“

“It’s been 30 minutes,” Edge sounded completely nonplussed, scanning the drink menu almost languidly, “Unless the Tale ‘verses and your brother are such...” He paused, tilting his head with a pensive hum, “Weightless drinkers?”

“Lightweights, Babe,” Stretch corrected automatically, popping himself into his tiptoes as if that would help him spot their friends in the crush of monsters and people. Unsurprisingly, it didn’t help much.  “And we’re late because you didn’t even start getting ready until 7, so I wouldn’t go around casting stones-“

“Mhm,” Edge flipped the drink menu over with a distracted hum, tapping at something with his claw, “They have Honey Mead here.”

“Awesome.” Stretch sighed again, using his hands to shade his sockets, “Like, Seriously, I know you like to look good- and you always do- but I just don’t get why you waited until the last minute. What, the ~*Captain of the Royal Guard*~ needs to be ~*fashionably late*~ to everything?”

“It’s an easy way to make a memorable entrance and an impression,” Edge sniffed primly, gesturing at the area behind his husband with an incline of his head, “And all attention is on you- sometimes before you even realize it.”

Stretch finally caught sight of Blue, who was now standing up and waving emphatically from a corner booth. Along with several other familiar faces who were starting to wave too.

“Papy, over here! I mean, Stretch! Edge!”

Stretch grabbed Edge by the hand before he could look too smug, pulling him along to the end of the table quickly, “Good evening, folks, you’re looking snug as can be.”

“Just so! They was thinkin’ ya wasn’t gonna show!” Red held his tankard up in greeting, sloshing some of the contents on the table right next to Classic. “I real know my Ñaño eh?! Shoulda bet on it, heh!”

“Yes, yes, you were right. I’ll just-“ Classic took Blue’s napkin, daintily dabbing at the spot with a long suffering expression. That definitely wasn’t the first (and certainly not the last) time that happened. Stretch didn’t envy him, being sandwiched between Red and Blue.

“Red-“ Edge started mildly, only to be cut off by a dazzling smile aimed directly at him. Classic waved his arms as though trying to convey it was no problem, but looking more like he was desperately cutting the air, vibrating in his seat as his smile stretched even wider, “It’s fine! This is a negativity free zone! Because!! You! Or you! Neither of you can afford to be stressed whilLE YOU’RE-“

Before Stretch even felt his hand go empty, Edge was in the booth- knee in between Slim’s legs, half-draped over Blue, and both hands covering Classic’s mouth.

“Hey-!” Blue started to complain, wriggling away until he met Stretch’s pleading expression, settling down wordlessly, but very sulkily.

“Your enthusiasm and excitement are noted and appreciated,” Edge sounded amused, even as he rotated his hands so his fingers were clamping the excited skeleton’s mouth shut, “But this is privileged information. Your discretion is mandatory!”

Eyes still bulging in surprise, Classic nodded quickly, looking a little worried.

Stretch cleared his throat, giving his counterpart a thumbs up with a wink, “We knew we could count on Ambassador Papyrus.”

That did it. Classic nodded emphatically, eyes sparkling with excitement (or tears?) as he quickly broke Edge’s hold to clasp his hands passionately.

“I understand! You can count on me!” Classic tried his best to whisper, but it was still loud enough the table behind them collectively winced and hunched into themselves. “I am a master at keeping secrets, state or otherwise! But! Congratulations! To both of you!”

“Thanks man,” Stretch made a little heart with his hands, “Classic, you’re a class act.”

“I’m not sure how I feel about that sentence,” the other skeleton narrowed his eyes suspiciously with a frown, before brightening immediately, “But you’re welcome!”

Edge managed to take his hands back at that point, straightening his spine and looking down at Slim primly, “Puppy.”

If Slim was at all disturbed at having Edge towering over him, practically sitting in his lap, he gave no outward indication. He simply ducked his head in greeting while still being almost completely engrossed on the baseball game playing over the bar.

“Oh, sit, sit!” Classic firmly (but gently) yanked Edge down into the new space between Slim and Blue, motioning Stretch to do the same, “Both of you! Being on your feet for too long isn’t healthy for, um, the um-“

“The VIP.... or VIB, as it were,” Comic offered with a wink, sliding closer to Black and patting the spot next to him with a lazy smile, “We’re all sorta family here, so make yourself at home, Big guy.”

Stretch grinned, sidling up next to Comic and slinging an arm over his shoulders, “Thanks, lil’ guy, you’re a great berson.”

Comic put his arm around Stretch’s back with a chuckle, fingertips just barely visible over the fabric, “Blease, pro, you’re gonna make me plush.”

“Ughhhh.” Black finally broke his silence with a sneer, the corners of his mouth twitching in annoyance even as he stubbornly refused to acknowledge anyone. Stretch idly wondered if those two were really that passionate about baseball, or if it was just a convenient distraction. Black’s posture was stiff and straight, while Slim was steadily curling on himself, like they just felt incredibly out of place and uncomfortable. Welp, time to make things more inclusionary then.

“Ok!” Stretch rubbed his hands together, “Now that we’re all here, let’s open this lil’ shindig properly! You ready, Babe?”

Stretch received that incredulous look Edge had been perfecting over the course of their relationship, rolling his eyes with unnecessary emphasis of how put upon he was... before doing exactly as he was asked. Edge drummed on the table, steadfastly avoiding eye contact with everyone else, as Stretch grinned and swept his arms out dramatically.

“Friends, family, and emotionally- repressed multidimensional assholes who aren’t sure why they’re here-“ Black smiled at that, putting all of his sharp teeth on display. It was deeply unsettling. “It is my pleasure and honor to officially announce the newest addition to our little family-“

Edge stopped drumming on Stretch’s cue, expression carefully blank but with that slight twitch to his mouth that meant he was trying very hard not to smile. “Pancake! They’ll be having their debut bash in February, probably, so keep your sockets out for the deets. Thanks for coming to celebrate with us, it means a skeleton.”

Classic gasped loudly, eyes bulging out of wide sockets, “Pancake?! Like the food?! Are- are you really-“ He withered when Edge turned his head to glare at him directly, “Um! That’s really creative! And very, very cute! I mean that, honestly! What, uh, what inspired you both to call your child Pancake?!”

“It’s a nickname,” Blue answered for them with a slight toss of his head, a note of irritation in his tone, “And I agree! My brother is a very creative and cute monster himself, so of course his child is going to have the most adorable and creative nickname, too!” Just as quickly, his voice lost that edge and he was all smiles again, dreamy stars in his eye sockets, “My little nibling is going to be the best monster ever! Have the best name ever! We’re gonna have the best time together!”

Blue looked down at the table with furrowed browbones, smile becoming less sure as he turned towards his brother-in-law, “That’s ok, right, Edge?”

To his credit, Edge was able to force down his surprise before it became too obvious, giving Blue a decisive nod. “Of course,” his voice had the usual bravado and self-assurance, but Stretch could hear the uncertainty in the undertone, “In fact, I’ll be counting on you to keep Red from getting them into unreasonable mischief. ”

“Just the regular, reasonable kind of mischief, then?” Blue asked wryly, but his smile was weak, clearly disappointed with the answer.

“If they take after me,” Edge puffed out his chest proudly, slipping into his more boisterous persona as he gestured with his hand dramatically. He was obviously uncomfortable, too, unable to interpret Blue’s new mood, “That will be inevitable!”

It was awkward and stilted, and Stretch found them both glancing in his direction for guidance, but they were trying. His husband and brother were trying very hard to actively get along, after months of bare minimum pleasantries and steadfastly avoiding each other. Stretch couldn’t help tearing up, wiping at the edge of his sockets with a sniffle.

“That confirms that then,” Black sniffed dismissively, resting his chin on his palms as he leaned against the table, “But it’s not much of a victory if you have to share it.”

“Huh?” Stretch dabbed at his eyes with the handkerchief Blue had passed him, distracted by the feel of Edge’s boot brushing along his femur. “What?”

“Ya sure, Lil’ Tyrant?!” Red was positively giddy, “Ain’t no one sure who’s knocked up!” He flapped his hands emphatically, clearly several drinks into the evening, “Don’t say nothin’ yet, let ‘em stew!”

“That’s not entirely true,” Blue chimed in from the corner, playing with his bendy straw and pointing it at himself, “Some monsters are sure...”

Red put a hand on Classic’s chest just to push him back far enough to pointedly glare at Blue. Classic smoothed the front of his shirt wordlessly, while Red leaned on the table conspiratorially, “There’s a bettin’ pool.”

Edge smirked in a way that made Stretch uneasy, resting his chin on his hand, “Oh? Well, in that case~”

He called the waitress over, “Two honey meads, some water, and a refill for the table. We’re going to need it.”

“You- or you?! -can’t drink!” Classic looked between them, scandalized, then at Comic for confirmation. Comic nodded sagely. “Yes, see?! Alcohol isn’t as bad for pregnant monsters as other things, but it’s still not good for you! It impairs your concentration, so your magic goes all funny! Yes, fine, there’s debate about its impact on raw, unused magic- but why take the chance if you’re loading a baby?!”

The waitress came back with a tray of drinks and started putting them on the table, hesitating when Blue and Classic glared at the mead. “Thank you,” Edge told her pleasantly, completely ignoring them and taking both himself.

He slid one mug towards Stretch, who took it with palpable unease and hesitation, flinching when Blue smacked his hands down on the table. “Papy, say something! I don’t know what game they’re trying to play, but you shouldn’t just condone it, especially because I don’t think you know either! Don’t just-“

“Shh!” Red crawled into Classic’s lap, putting his hands over Blue’s mouth with a scowl, “Pipe down, Baby Blue- ain’t nothin’ goin’ to happen to the squirt. Wait ‘n listen, ya goddamn goofs-“ He turned to give Classic a stern look too, “Got lotsa shitty stuff in this family, but idiocy ain’t one of ‘em.”

Although Edge managed to keep himself from reacting to the backhanded compliment, his smile was less threatening and more genuine as he ran a claw along the circuit of the mug. “I’m raising the stakes- another drink of equal or greater value to the pool. I’ll take your bet and the reasoning behind it as suitable collateral.”

[Part 1 - Here! ] [Part 2 ] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6]

[darkouter]

just some sean headcanons cause Why Not

- sean is the kind of guy that brushes his teeth for like......  over 5 minutes.  and other behaviors like that.  long, meticulous showers every day (keep in mind that’s strange given the time period).  it kind of stems from when he was abused, feeling dirty.  now he works at the asylum, and it can be pretty grungy, even though he and lottie try to keep it clean as possible.  there’s also the matter of smoking - he wants to keep himself smelling nice as he can.  now that he’s a skal and eating all that meat, he also just really doesn’t want to smell like death.  gross.  he’s just really particular.  i wouldn’t say he has OCD or anything, but it definitely holds its roots in his anxiety.  he needs to be presentable, and he panics a bit when things aren’t perfect.

- definitely writes people poems or letters to leave for them if he holds any affection for them - in platonic relationships too!  wholesome content creator.  wants everyone to know how much they mean to him and tells everyone about their good qualities.  definitely would spout inspirational quotes, the kind you see girls on facebook sharing You Know What I Mean.  this behavior is definitely why william bishop called sean one of his closest friends - he just makes people feel loved when they feel like they’re unlovable.

- he’s a romantic !  in general, it’s hard for him because he has intimacy issues and his anxieties keep him at bay from expressing those kinds of feelings toward people - he hasn’t dated someone in a long time.  but he’s the type to get butterflies in his stomach even if he’s been with someone for years.  will buy roses.  brings food.  compliments always.  lots of love yous.  he’s a sad puppy please love him.  he’s pretty easily pleased himself.  just give him hugs and cuddles and affection blease.  reassure him when he feels insecure.  maybe give him a backrub though the poor guy has knots for days with all that stress.

- he’s pansexual, but again, he has intimacy issues and he’s a devout catholic, so he wouldn’t be ready for sex with anyone for a While.

- i mentioned it, but he’s a pacifist.  he didn’t even fight wil/liam bishop back despite having a cross around his damn neck.  if the guard of priwen decide to dust his ass, all he can do is run, but he’s honestly not even liable to do that.  he just tries to reason with people because he trusts too much, thinking they can be swayed.  also evidenced by bishop.  he doesn’t like to raise his voice with people either, and he’s more likely to cry during an argument than yell. 

- the only exclusion to all of this is tobias whitaker.  he hates tobias whitaker.  so much.  they regularly spit back biblical verses at each other if they talk - sean calls him a heretical zealot, has even cussed him out before, which shocked EVERYONE.  that was the big gossip for a long time.  and honestly?  he might have even thrown a punch at him at some point.  he’s given up on tobias, he really has.  there was a time when he would have polite debate, but it’s become an all-out feud.  it’s sean, so he tries not to bad mouth people in general, but he sure as hell would grit his teeth if someone asked him about tobias.  sean tries to completely avoid him now, if remotely possible.  literally will take the long route through alleys to stay away from him.

- drinking ekon blood, particularly jonathan’s because of how Pure and Good his blood is, has kind of...  upgraded him.  broke skal to woke skal.  by a week after turning, his wounds heal, and he looks quite a bit more presentable.  he’ll always look like he’s sick, given how pale he is, and his eyes continue to be white, so he doesn’t exactly become entirely human-passing, but !  it also sated his hunger quite a bit, and he doesn’t need to do much to sustain himself.  he can drink blood or eat animal meat between proper meals, but he does still have to resort to eating human corpses.  he feels bad about it.

- i’ve also mentioned:  he’s extremely bitter toward jonathan for manipulating him the way he did.  jonathan criticizing him for eating dead corpses, bringing up how he was orphaned and abused in order to force his hand, and being commanded to kneel?  drink blood by coercion?  he feels really gross about it.  he’s had memories dragged to the forefront of his mind despite it being over half his life ago.  he’s probably been able to move on in a lot of ways, but reid just scrambled his head.  sean is rightly upset with him, gets surly when jonathan asks to examine him.  however, sean also knows that jonathan was right.  he knows that jonathan was just doing whatever he could to protect sean and his flock, and they’re the most important people to him, so he has mixed feelings.  he feels guilty for being so thoroughly mad at reid because reid is still a good person, but he simply went about things in the worst way.  there’s a lot of shame over how sean acted so nonsensically during that manic episode, so he just feels embarrassed when jonathan comes around because jonathan saw him in his worst and most vulnerable moments.  it’s just Not Good

- because of this new resentment towards someone, he’s projecting a lot of his issues onto jonathan.  he has a lot of bottled up frustration, and he acts or thinks meanly toward reid.  he knows rationally that he shouldn’t.  he tries very hard to knock this out of his head, which makes for some...  interesting moments with jonathan.  because being around jonathan makes him uncomfortable, he tries to force himself to make up for it.  finally lets jonathan examine him, do check-ups on his health for research purposes.  but he ends up repeatedly signing some crosses and mumbling prayers underneath his breath, asking the Lord to forgive his spiteful thoughts or comments.  jonathan’s just left to be Very Confused

- because he drank from jonathan’s blood, he can sometimes hear him in the same way mary did.  obviously jonathan doesn’t even realize he’s doing this - doesn’t mean to - sean just hears....  random thoughts at random times.  gets confused at first.  wonders if and why the lord is talking to him about gossip around town.  takes a while to realize it’s reid he’s hearing.  of course it’s reid, the most awkward person it could possibly be.  besides tobias, that is.

- not a headcanon, but someone let me have a thread where he gets to cry.  we didn’t get to see him cry in the game even though that’s a major point of his character.  Give Me Crying Sean