#if anyone else could offer anon some advice please feel free

[subsystems]

Hello -

As a person with DID who has successfully fused alters/parts, do you have any information, resources, or advice for systems hoping to do the same?

My system is hoping to reach a point where we can act and function as one, but it’s been horrible trying to find resources on fusion. Nearly every article about fusion we could find places this second to functional multiplicity and seems to confuse fusion and integration. Or worse, claims that fusion is a way to kill alters!

Our therapist has been immensely helpful, but we find ourselves wanting to read more about this process or hear from others who have successfully managed a fusion. Any help would be greatly appreciated - thank you!

Hi, anon. I'm so sorry that you've been struggling to find resources on your desired recovery. I went through that struggle too, it's hard. I'm glad you have a therapist to help you out through all of this.

If you want, I've talked about my own experience with final fusion on this blog and I'm always open to talking about it more if there's anything in particular you want to hear about!

Definitely seek out other systems who have experience with partial/full fusion, too. Off the top of my head, there's @system-of-a-feather, @reimeichan, @hiiragi7, and @smokee78 (hope it's okay to tag you guys!). They haven't been active recently, but back when I was working towards final fusion, @puppydeathfarts made posts that I found really helpful. If there's anyone else who has experience with partial/full fusion, though, please leave a comment!

I also recommend checking out Rachel Downing's experience with final fusion/full integration and Jess's from Multiplicity & Me:

Their experiences helped me feel less alone when I was pursuing final fusion. There was also another person, but unfortunately they left the community due to harassment and deleted their posts. I will forever for grateful to all of them for being brave enough to share this vulnerable and personal part of their lives, they've certainly given me the strength to share my own.

As for articles, unfortunately I don't know of too many that don't stigmatize final fusion. DID-research offers a good summary of final fusion and a few interesting links to check out here.

You can find a bunch of free downloads for self-help books here. Out of all of them, I feel like Coping with Trauma-related Dissociation is a great self-help book for people who are a being supported by a therapist and interested in pursuing harmony and stronger integration within their dissociative system. I don't think it would've been possible for me to achieve final fusion or even functional multiplicity without the techniques I learned from this book. I cannot emphasize how useful it is!

Some extra things from me:

You have to work with your parts, first. You can't skip ahead to fusion. Aim to pave for understanding, acceptance, and harmony within your system. Fusion, if you want it, is the natural progression to that!

There are ways to test out fusion. Talk to your therapist about "blending" (it's also described in the coping book, but definitely mention it to your therapist). You can test out what it's like to be fused as many times as you want.

Fusion can feel weird at first. It shouldn't feel bad, but it can be strange. It took me time to get used to it. It can also feel differently depending on what stage of recovery you're in... ->

When I still had amnesia and less co-operation in my system, fusions slid under the radar and surprised the hell out of me! As I continued lowering those dissociative barriers, developing better communication and co-consciousness as a system, things become way clearer.

After you become fully fused for the first time, it's completely okay if you fall apart a few times before it really sticks! Final fusion is a process, not a destination.

You're allowed to choose whatever labels you want after final fusion. Call yourself a system or plural or say you've become a singlet or whatever you want. It's also okay to go unlabeled!

Your parts aren't gone after final fusion, but that separation is gone and it's okay if you need to mourn that. Sometimes I miss what it was like being fragmented. It's not because I want to be fragmented again, but because that was how I lived my entire life up until now, it was what was most natural to me, and it had its good and bad sides. I'm thankful for it because it was that separation which allowed me to survive! I view this similarly to how it was like to move recently. Sometimes I miss my old home, but that doesn't mean I want to go back or that I'm not happier where I am now. Things can be complicated like that!

After final fusion, you continue to learn new things about yourself and your system. It's a new journey in of itself -- a very, very wonderful one. 💚

I hope you find something helpful here. Either way, know that you are not alone on this journey. I support you whole-heartedly. Good luck with everything!

- Sunflower

[loreandorder]

This may be asking way much, or too much information in itself, but... I used to be in a bad relationship where I was stripped of my personhood by force and was frequently likened to dogs and wolves in negative ways. (It's been a long time now since I escaped that.) Recently, I've started to enjoy the idea of being a werewolf a little bit, but I still get anxious about the thought of being denied my humanity if I in any way welcome being a beast. Can I ask for some words of advice? Or a good greeting sniff, maybe?

Don't feel pressured to respond, I just dumped this all in your inbox with barely any prompting. I hope you have a good day anyway.

Hey there love ♡

I'm so sorry to hear you were treated that way. No one should ever be dehumanized like that against their will. I know it might be tough sometimes, but please try to remember that you are very much a person who holds great value for being the unique little gem you are ((and this goes for everyone!)). I'm very glad you're free and safe from that now!

Welcome to the werewolf/wolf creature club hun 🐺 I'm sorry it brings you anxiety despite your interest/curiosity. I'm no professional, so take my 'advice' with a grain of salt, but I think that slowly embracing this new beast you're discovering could be quite empowering and freeing for you. This time around, you're the one making the choice to safely enter that headspace. You are the one in control of what you are in that moment, no one else. No one can force it upon you, and no one can take it away from you either ((and anyone would be crazy to try either with a big bad werewolf beast! They're much too strong and powerful!)). And remember, depending on the lore, werewolves are usually at least partly human. So, even if you welcome the beast in, you will always retain a piece of your humanity!

I hope I could in some way be helpful dear anon. If you ever need a listening ear, my askbox and dms are open for you even if we aren't moots 🫶🏻 I'm giving you the biggest greeting sniff and offering up a comforting nuzzle if you'd like one ♡

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Hi, i am sorry if that'll get a bit longer but i need to get this off my shoulders. There should be no triggers.

I was wondering for years if i have head mates, some symptoms suggesting yes, but not clear enough for me. Then i read about osdd-1b, the way that the non-amnesia manifested for one system and they said "i got out of an amnesia and got the information what happened during that time right into my brain like a script" and that is literally what has happened to me. But only once, as far as i am aware, and that was 10 years ago. I was always carefully talking to potential head mates (or to myself, i mean, if you talk to your inner self or a mate doesn't really matter, it felt good) but always with the thought of "i am not sure, time will tell". And it does feel like sometimes there are people listening, sometimes more people, sometimes less, but i never got any clear enough (for my peace of mind) feedback. Until yesterday. So i was watching this new series and there was this character who shook something in me. Who was like some part in me, by the looks but even more by behavior and thoughts. I had dreams about this behavior in the past, which really made me euphoric in that dream and really confused me when awake, because it was so not-me like. I can't explain the "me but not me" thing very well, sorry. Also, it is not about anything violent or so, i just try to keep this short.

Then i wrote down in my diary what i thought about that and idk it didn't really feel like i was writing anymore at some point (and my hand was shaking so much that i will never be able to decipher this, lol). So i tried to "get in contact" today again, and it didn't really work. Which is as usual, but now i am at a point where i really have to ask myself, what if i am wrong? What if the symptoms are because of some other illness or just random (since nothing was really an exclusive symptom), and if i believe too much in it and interpret symptoms according to my beliefs?

At what point can i say "Well, that wasn't true"? And will i belief it then?

Can you give me some advice?

Hi anon,

It is not up to me to tell you whether or not your experiences are due to having a dissociative disorder or not, as you would know that better than anyone else - it's your mind and your experience.

As someone who was recently diagnosed with OSDD, it is absolutely normal to fluctuate between feeling alone in your mind and feeling the presence of others. It's normal to question whether or not your experiences are truly due to OSDD, even after diagnosis. It's normal to wonder if you're trying to convince yourself that what you're experiencing is OSDD, even if that truly is the case. It's normal for certain parts to resonate with characters and use them to shape or define themselves. It's normal to hear silence when trying to communicate internally.

Something that has really helped me is to remind myself not to think about it too hard - in other words, it's okay if you're wrong about having OSDD, you're just trying to figure out what's going on inside your mind and there's nothing wrong with that. Especially because dissociative disorders are so stigmatized, it's hard to not immediately label or question experiences. But I've personally found, in having OSDD, that my system functions and communicates best when I let things exist how they are, without trying to ask myself if this is OSDD or potentially another condition.

If anyone else would like to offer their thoughts or reassurance, please feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[foxgirl-brainrot]

https://www.tumblr.com/foxgirl-brainrot/773357647323906048/is-it-ok-for-anyone-to-vent-in-here?source=share

this anon again...

just to preface, im 15, so you can go ahead and tell me to fuck off if you want. i just dont have anywhere or anyone else to say this to.

ive never fit in anywhere, not in friend groups, online communities, at my schools, or anything, ive always just had something wrong, and i like your blog and this community, but i can never be a part of it. one thing i felt like i could be part of and i cant.

ive had these kinda issues since im unfortunately hypersexual but just. its been so much worse lately. im scared, because now i wont fit in even more. i dont know if ill even make it to 17, or *febuary*.

sorry to interact with an 18+ blog, i dont mind if you just delete this or something, i probably shouldnt have submitted that first one either, but i guess at a point i just. i dont know. sorry.

... if you'd like advice Anon, you have permission to DM me 🤍

It sounds like you need some support! And as an adult I think it's pretty reasonable (and fair) to offer that to you.

So please, feel free to drop by on your own time and I can help you figure this out some, okay?

[paintedpeeta]

hi. I'm sorry for what im about to say, but i just need to let this go somewhere, otherwise imma explode. i can't talk to most of my friends right now, and i don't wanna bother anyone.

that's hypocritical of me since im coming here to bother you... and that's what im sorry about the most, but since you answered my previous ask with the most gentle treatment ive been given in days, here's me again.

im in the fandom for almost a year now. it's still difficult for me to write for everlark, specially following canon because they mean a lot to me, and im always afraid that im doing it the wrong way. I've been working on a longfic since february and there was a time where I was SO GENUINELY PROUD AND EXCITED about how i was writing, but i can't feel that anymore.

i can't feel that with anything i write. and when i do, or at least have some hope that someone will read it... nothing. not even my friends, the ones who pressured me to post it earlier than i planned in the first place. and now i feel like i have nothing, since nobody reads my thg shit and i pretty much stopped writing for other fandoms.

as a brazilian i kinda don't have the right to expect much, bc people who read everlark in portuguese nowdays are basically extinct and im not exactly using the best plataforms... but i still do. and that's making me sick.

i had to deactivate my twitter account this week because some family stuff, and i used to post a lot of my writings there. i created a new one, but now i have lost all of the lil reach i had, and i can't find most of my mutuals. my friends still couldn't care less about my writing.

i feel like im a bad author. not because my writing sucks or because I can't build storylines. i can, and feel like i do that decently. what i mean is that... nobodys reading what i put into the world. and what's the sense in all writings, if not make others feel so comforted and welcomed by our stories as we do, as authors?

i genuinely feel like getting out of twitter for good, because being there is not nice anymore. not when i see all people that promised me they would read my fics tweeting all day about all kinds of subjects and leaving me on read on dms. not when i post drabbles and have to delete them hours later because nobody sees or interacts w it.

at the same time, i don't know how to use tumblr. and every other part of my life is falling apart.

im sorry, again. but that's what I feel right now and i guess I just wanted someone to listen and comfort me, since my two other happiness sources are fictional. ignore that if you want. please, don't answer it because you feel like it's the polite thing to do or because you feel like you have to. you don't.

- I.H.

hello, anon :)

first of all i’m sorry that you’re feeling so down, i wish there was something i could do to help you more than just replying to this ask - so please remember that my messages are always open (i won’t take offence if you’d rather communicate through my inbox to keep ur anonymity of course) if you wanted to talk a little more. you must be hurting pretty bad if you feel like you can’t talk to your friends about it :(

and second of all, please don’t feel so discouraged that you stop with your writing. i really don’t read multi-chapter fics myself (i don’t even have an AO3 account if you’d believe it or not) so i sometimes feel a little guilty that i don’t do enough to support fic writers, who give up so much of their time to give other people some enjoyment and a little bit of escape. if you’d like to share the name or link etc of your fic with me i’d be more than happy to post it on my blog if you thought that would help any.

as for your troubles with writing in your native language, i can only imagine how frustrating that would feel for you. i wonder if anyone in the fandom would be able to help in the way of translation or something in order to help you in that respect? sadly i don’t speak portuguese, so i doubt i’d be any use on this one :(

and honestly i only have twitter for personal use so i’m not any help there but is there perhaps a way to reactivate your account? i wasn’t so sure but according to google you can get a deactivated account back within 30 days, if that would be in any use for reconnecting with your followers on there.

and lastly i hope you keep the faith in the longfic you’ve been writing. it would be terribly sad for you to lose all that you’ve worked on since february. that being said, if you feel like it’s giving you so much stress and just feeling fruitless it’s also okay to take a break and step back for a little while. no one will feel disappointed and you certainly shouldn’t feel that way about yourself. tumblr is sort of a pain in the ass to use i won’t deny it, but there are some amazing people and writers on here who i’m sure would be willing to help you out.

please don’t be a stranger if you need to rant again, and i hope any of what i’ve said is at least a little bit useful for you 😊

[sadcypher]

heyo! this might be an out-of-the-blue request but could you perhaps give to a fellow mediocre student that is going to enroll in their first year of a physics degree (with a focus on Astrophysics and Astronomy) some tips on how to survive university? I am going to be a first-generation student so the advice that has been given to me is rather scarce... Anything from simple tips to your personal view would be appreciated!

oh exciting! Im also a first gen student so I also felt very lost and alone at the beginning.

making friends: socializing and networking specifically at the beginning of the first semester is terrifying but almost everyone feels that way, freshers are desperate to make friends so connecting is easier. Also you will find yourself in situations that are perfect set-ups to start off friendships: group projects, people looking for study groups, freshers events, clubs,... just do yourself the favor to participate here and there! Also dont stress yourself about making these friendships within the first weeks, you meet new people throughout your time at university. Also not sure what your housing situation will be but dorms are also a good place to start connecting with people!

feeling very lonely at first: totally normal but be prepared for it, find hobbies and activities you can do on your own that keep you busy, maybe join a sports club or find weekly community meetups? Maybe regularly call friends or family? I wasnt able to avoid feeling very alone even though I was prepared for it but knowing that the odds are good that it wont be like that forever helps!

physics courses are hard: they are doable but time consuming. Keeping a study routine that is low maintenance but consistent is worth more than doing several insane 16 hours study sessions during exam season. And try to find a study group to go through the materials and for solving practice problems, preferably people that you feel at ease and motivated studying with.

Balance and mental health: please take care of yourself! Dont overwork yourself but also dont slack off because thats a good set up for spiraling; you have to find a system that works for you to balance uni, free time, sleep and maybe work, and dont listen too much to what others do, everyones needs and bodies are different so what works for others might not work for you! Tho whatever you do dont cut back on sleep if you can. Additionally having a safety net can be helpful, universities often offer free (or more affordable) counseling!

Feeling out of place: Especially if one isnt a child of academics it is very easy to feel like you dont belong but thats absolute bs. You have every right to be there. You might have to work harder than others which sucks and is very unfair but you will look back and see how much progress you have made. And something I have experienced is that family is often very discouraging, my parents are repeatedly trying to talk me into getting a job because they dont see the point in going through +5 years of university to end up doing something in physics/astro. So feel free to just trust your own head and gut feeling sometimes. At the end of the day it is your future. And self check for imposter syndrome because that can make your time at uni very very hard. If you talk to people about it I can assure you that 75% will share that feeling, and these conversations often help identifying that it is literally just your silly little brain acting up a bit.

if anyone comes up with anything else feel free to add to this list! And i hope some of these were useful, anon!

[twopoppies]

Can I have some career advice please Gina?

I am a retail manager and have just left one company for another company since the pay was better. I’ve been working there for two months and I don’t mind it but I have massive imposter syndrome as it’s a huge store on a major city high street with a team of 30 staff. I am anxious a few times a day and my direct boss is a bit cold although I think that’s just her personality. My old company have just called me and offered to match the salary if I come back and I don’t know what to do. On the one hand it’s almost like the same money for less responsibility as it’s a smaller store with a smaller team, but that also means there’s no room for progression. I also feel really weird about leaving this job after only 2 months as although it makes me anxious I’m giving it the benefit of the doubt that I’m still settling in.

What should I do? Go somewhere comfortable? Or stick with the new job and hope it gets better and that I can keep working my way up? If they’d offered me the better pay before I left I probably would’ve stayed but I hate quitting jobs lol.

Hi sweetheart. So, at the end of the day, you’re the only one that can really make the call. But, without knowing anything else about your situation these are the first things that come to mind.

First, the fact that your previous job wants you back and they’re willing to pay the same salary shows that you are completely competent and able to do what you’re doing at the big chain store. I don’t think they would have hired you at the new job if they were concerned about your capabilities. imposter syndrome is a super common thing for so many people. You probably need to make a decision fairly quickly, but it would be helpful for you in the long run to look into why this is happening for you.

Beyond that, if you want to stay in retail, will your prior job look as good on your résumé as the one you’re currently in? Are you otherwise happy at the current job? Is there anyone you can talk to to get feedback on how you are doing? Is there anything you could change about the current job that would make it less anxiety provoking? My guess is if they had any concerns about your abilities they would have already brought it up to you.

The other thing is, some people stay in a job that is secure and comfortable and low stress, and they are fine with that being “just a job”. And then they make the rest of their life as fulfilling and creative as they might want. if you want a career in this field, I guess my question is will you be hampering your chances over the long run by giving up this opportunity to stay at the present job? That is, if it turns out you really don’t like the new company, will it be easier to get something else having been there even for a few months?

If anyone else has more/different advice for this anon, feel free to chime in.

[positivelyadhd]

hi there! do you have any tips on how to support a friend when you struggle with words? i'm autistic and Really struggle with my words when i'm feeling strong emotions. i spend a long time trying to find other words but always end up using the same script over and over and it doesn't at all express what i'm trying to. i care very very deeply about them i just struggle so much with words but i want to be better at being there for them and showing them i DO care

"autistic anon who wants to support their friend back Again. i also want to add too that i've spent hours reading up on supportive things to say in various situations. but once the time comes to actually support my friend all the scripts leave my head and i'm stuck unable to find any words except for my usual support script (that's starting to feel very empty and uncaring because i use it every time). i'm trying very hard to improve at this but i feel like i'm letting my friends down"

hi anon!!

firstly it sounds like you genuinely really care about your friend and want to be able to comfort them when they're struggling which I think is the most important part! to be honest, I don't think there's anything wrong with having things you usually say when comforting someone if it helps those people!

I can't speak for your friends but I've found when people are looking for comfort what they often need is someone to just listen to them and to know that person supports them which it sounds like you're doing really well!

I think it can help to talk to those specific friends outside of when they're upset and ask them what they find comforting. I've seen some people say they ask people if they want to vent or advice first and I think that's really helpful! to ask the person you're talking to specifically what they think they're looking for so that you can offer it to them. the things a person needs varies greatly depending on their situation and I don't think people would ever mind you asking what they need from you!!

I've also picked up a couple of things I've learnt in various psych classes that could help if you need some more things to add to your script! again, I don't think there's anything wrong with having a script (part of what training therapists actually do is essentially learn parts of a script to use in sessions!) but here's a couple of things that can make it seem less obvious if that's what you're worried about!

ask questions! a really major part of learning to help people is active listening which is basically just showing you're listening to them! that can be done through simple things like nodding or saying small words like "yeah" and "mhmm" to asking the person questions about what they're saying!

trust yourself! you know your relationship with your friend the best and whats important is to actually believe in what you're saying. If you think of something that you think would be helpful then it might be! you can always ask them in advance something like "do you want me to talk about this with you or just listen?" before you say something!

TL:DR, I really think wanting to help your friend is what's most important and you've clearly got that down! If you're unsure of what to say there's nothing wrong with asking them what they might need! It's difficult to know exactly what a person wants especially when they themselves might not even no but just showing that you're listening and trying to support them is what I think is most important.

Also, if anyone else has any suggestions please feel free to comment!!

[snowstark]

Do you have any tips on how to get writing done fast? I have all the ideas for my story in my head but I can never get the words onto the document. You're always cranking out a lot content super fast so I wanted to ask you to share your secret with us lol

hello hello!!! oh god okay, i think i have a few tips to offer you? of course, keep in mind that what works for me might not work for you, you should experiment (if you haven't already) to see what type of writer you are!!

personally, i'm not at all a chronological writer. i'm the type of writer who literally writes the endings to my fics before the beginning, or i'll just write a random scene in my head to get the creative juices flowing, and then i piece all those parts together and looks it over to see how it reads. so, option 1: you could try writing scenes that you're particularly excited about, and that could inspire you to write the other parts that you're having trouble with.

sometimes, the words don't come out because i don't have much of a clear idea of what i want. like, sure, i know the type of vibe i want, but it's hard to actually write a cohesive plot when all that's in my mind is "wooo mafia boss peter!" so when this happens, option 2: i like to reach out to a few writer friends and flesh out my ideas with them. @vaguekiwi @carelessannie @peterrparrkerr are my go-to victims buddies. if you don't really have anyone that you can message, you could try making a post about it, or literally reach out to someone new!! chances are they'd be more than happy to help!!! (also, grace/annie/basil i tagged you because you guys might have advice for anon that i haven't said already, so feel free to jump in!)

option 3: i'll use this website called fighter's block to get me going. you can set a goal (i.e. 500 words) and the main idea is that with every word you type, your character fights the little monster. this is most effective for me when all else fails, because when you see the timer going down, it forces you to just write without second guessing.

option 4: i don't do this often, but you can try handwriting your story, or at least, some of the main dialogue. a lot slower than typing, but it could still help.

option 5: remind yourself that it's okay to take it easy. it can be frustrating, but you should be writing for fun, not to stress yourself out. sometimes, it's okay to take a break, or take longer than you expected. go read a fic that inspires you, listen to some music, or just step away from it completely for a few days before coming back.

those are my main tips, i hope you find them at least somewhat helpful! if anyone else has some tips to share, please feel free to add on!!! <3

[yumgrapejuice]

Hello there! I recently found your fic A is for accidental dimensional travel on ao3 and would first like to say good job! I am thoroughly enjoying the story so far. As an amateur writer, I wanted to ask if you have any writing tips?

First, I’m really happy to hear you’re enjoying it, thank you!! And second, of course!!!:D That’s very flattering haha, and it’s something I can talk about for hours, though I’ll try to keep it condensed:’D I’m an amateur writer myself, of course, but, hey, I think every writer has something valuable to offer in terms of advice, and I have been pretty obsessed over the topic for years I guess lol.

I will say, though, that writing is like any other skill, and certain advice fits certain levels (I’ve had someone come to me about writing tips who didn’t have a grasp on the most basic concepts, so I told them different things from what I’d tell someone who’s actually been writing for a while). I don’t know what level you’re at, anon, so I’ll try to keep it to tips that I personally use whenever I’m writing, just a few quick things:D However!! You can always directly dm me and I’d be more than happy to offer more personalized/specific advice if that’s something you’d like:))

(I’d also like to mention that, to me, fanfiction writing is different from original writing. In fanfics, I usually go with the first draft of any chapter and I focus more on the Fun stuff, whereas with original stuff I’d have multiple drafts and be more careful. I just don’t have the time nor the need to perfect my fics if I like them enough as is, and I don't expect anyone else to perfect them, either. But, hey, that’s just me)

(Also, also, don’t look at me for grammar lmao sorry)

Putting the rest under the cut!:D

Dialogue is my favorite part of writing, so I’d like to share a few things I keep in mind whenever I’m constructing it.

First, unless a character is monologuing, I try to keep each person’s lines to no more than 3-4 sentences at a time. That way the dialogue flows more naturally and feels like people are actually talking.

Second, people are rarely graceful with their words, especially if they’re flustered for any reason. Cutting off sentences is a good way to show that, but don’t overdo it, either. That goes for stuttering, too. A couple of cuts or stutters is more than enough. I tend to break this "rule" when someone is really struggling, but that's only on special occasions.

Third, not every line needs a dialogue tag!! You need to evaluate what’s actually important. If you’re using a dialogue tag, you’re drawing attention to it. Why? Is it unclear who’s speaking? Are they performing some action that adds to/reinforces/conflicts with what’s being said? Is it funny? If there isn’t a good reason, you can just leave it without a tag. (Also, dialogue without tags flows much quicker, so that’s something to keep in mind. That's good for a quippy exchange.)

Fourth, I try to always progress some aspect of the story with every line. Usually, that can be plot progression or character progression. They can chatter about their day, the weather, work, sure, but it needs to progress something. Maybe it’s used to showcase the tense/awkward atmosphere. Maybe they learn information that’ll be useful later. Maybe it’s a way to show personality. Just, have it have a purpose.

And last, ‘said’ is not dead. Our eyes when reading barely register the word, so if you don’t wanna draw attention to how something is being said, use… ‘said’ lol.

A few more general things:

I don’t switch POVs often, but when I do, I try to make each POV have its distinct voice, which is something you hear a lot about in writing classes and such. People far more advanced than me can explain it much better, but the way I go about it is similar to dialogue. Different people use different phrases, some go on long tangents, some introspect a lot, some would rather die than think for a second about what they’re feeling (doesn’t mean you shouldn’t describe their emotional responses; just that some may draw more attention to them and linger longer). Switching between more formal styles to looser and rambly is also an easy and quick way to distinguish different narrators.

If you focus a lot on a certain detail, that detail needs to be important. Listen, I didn't spend multiple paragraphs on Dream fawning over an ender chest for that to be trivial in the future lol. The more attention you draw to something, you more weight you put on it. I really recommend that you bring it back eventually.

What’s the worst that can happen? Make it happen, and make it worse lol.

Your readers aren’t stupid, don’t spoon-feed them information. They’re smart cookies, leave some clues and they’ll figure it out. Hopefully. Use your judgement lol. But that goes for descriptions, too. Help them paint the scene, don’t actually paint it for them. Use different senses to describe something, such as smell, touch, sound. Once again, draw attention only to what’s actually important. (I’ve really enjoyed the way descriptions were done in Path of Golden Green)

If you want a line to have a lot of weight, put it in a separate paragraph. That’s probably obvious, but good to have it in mind haha.

Decide what atmosphere you want your story to have. If you’re going for a lighter one, don’t focus too much on serious, dark things. Likewise, tragedies and comedy don’t mix well unless it’s a tragicomedy lol, but that’s a whole other thing. I usually like going for a nice middle, sometimes leaning more towards light stuff. It’s why in A is for Accidental I didn’t dwell too much on the possible effects the prison could have had on mh!Dream because I wanted to keep that storyline relatively light (at least, compared to dsmp!Dream’s storyline lol). Possible trauma just. wasn’t the point here lmao. I just slap on a “eh, not his first rodeo” and I’m done haha. Not everything needs to be heavy angst and not everything needs to be all funny and fluffy. Find what balance you wanna have. Basically, it’s usually not a good idea to betray your readers lol.

This is more of a pet peeve but I really dislike head-hopping lol. It's basically when one paragraph is from one character's POV, the next one is from another's. I guess there's the third-person omniscient POV where that can fly, I suppose, but I'm more of a third-person limited kind of person lol. If that's the POV you're going with, decide on your POV character and stick to it (until the change in POV, at least), pretty please <3

This is very unorganized but each aspect of writing has so much that could be said about it that I thought I should stop here lol. If there’s anything specific you’d like me to talk about or to elaborate on something, please, feel free to ask; again, I’d be more than happy to ramble more about writing lol. I could go on forever, honestly:’D

[tickle-bugs]

I had two people ask for some advice on starting up/running a blog, so I thought I’d make a little post for anyone else looking for advice! There’s no one right way to run a blog and I am by no means an expert. This is just a compilation of some of the things I’ve learned :) 

Feel free to add advice to this!

- The first thing is something I cannot stress enough. Write for yourself first. You will be absolutely miserable if you’re only writing for attention. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s so incredibly important. If you don’t like a prompt, fandom, or scenario? You don’t have to write for it! A personal example: I’m a theatre kid and total musical nerd. I could probably write some compelling Dear Evan Hansen or Hamilton headcanons if I wanted to, but I don’t. That’s fine! I’m allowed to say I won’t write for it and deny prompts/requests for those fandoms. 

- Set boundaries. This is a very mixed community with all sorts of creators and participants with hands in different baskets. Don’t want minors to interact? Put minors DNI in your bio. SFW only? Put it in the bio. No RP? Bio. This goes for private conversations/askbox/other interactions as well. If someone comes into your askbox/dms and says something that makes you uncomfy, shut it down. 

- My advice is more geared towards writing than art or video, but I suppose you could apply this advice as well. Make what makes you happy! If you’re only in one fandom, feel free to stay there and make content for it. Multi-fandom? Excellent! Completely non-fandom? Epic! Make the content that you want to see and the content that makes you happy to create, especially if you’re in a more niche fandom/area. 

- Organization. ...I’ll admit this one is more of a personal pet peeve than something urgent, but it is something that people positively respond to. If you have some sort of consistency/organization to your blog, it’ll make it easier and more enjoyable for people to navigate. Make a fandom list/indicate your fandoms somehow (mostly for prompt purposes. people can’t read your mind, so it’s important to tell them what you will write for and what you won’t, however you want to do that)! 

Make a masterpost/link your fic tag! Use a fic tag of some kind. Give your fics summaries and leave a little bit of the fic above the ‘read more’ to intrigue folks (look at #my fics and my masterpost for basic examples of how I do this, if you need!). Use read mores. Please use read mores (if you can, idk if they’re on mobile. regardless no one wants to encounter a three thousand word block of text on their dash). (No seriously though, organize your blog, even if it’s super simple. literally just a ‘mine’ or ‘my fics’ or ‘[pseud] writes’ and a fandom tag. It’ll make it easier for people to find your stuff and support you)

- Practice general internetiquette. Please remember that the people in this community are real people with feelings, boundaries, and lives outside of the blog that they run. Be genuine and people will respond to you! Don’t manipulate people into likes/reblogs/attention. No one wants to be on the other end of that. Being in this community isn’t a transaction or a mosh pit, it’s an experience.  

- Be ever-so-liberal with the block button. Someone’s user makes you uncomfortable? They give you bad vibes? They’re a minor/older than you and you don’t want them interacting with your content? You don’t wanna see their blog for some reason? Block em. This goes for anons too. That’s what the button is for. Don’t feel guilty for using it. Use it. 

- How you write is 100% a personal choice and not really something that I can give advice on, but embrace your style! take prompts if you want, or don’t. Write oneshots, series, drabbles, or novels. Write romantic, or don’t. Etc. Change things up if you feel like it. Do what you want. Your blog, your style, your rules. 

- Numbers matter. Don’t let them define you. This is a bit of a harder one to explain, but I will try. I often say that I don’t care about numbers, and I really don’t, but that’s not to say that I don’t see them and they have zero effect on me. I absolutely notice and am bummed if a fic doesn’t get notes, or at least the notes that I was expecting. That is entirely normal and okay to experience. What isn’t okay, though, is creating for the sake of getting notes/numbers/attention (re: write for yourself first, internetiquette). If you find yourself relying on tumblr for gratification and a reward, I implore you to take a break. I’m not your therapist or your parent, I’m not gonna tell you what to do, but when you make things only for the sake of notes, people notice. Celebrate your milestones. Know that it’s okay to be bummed about low notes/celebrate getting plenty. Just make sure that you don’t depend on the numbers for your happiness, or you will be miserable.

- You’re (probably) doing this for free. You are providing people content: a service. Produce as much or as little as you’re comfy with, but always remember that. No one is entitled to what you make. If someone asks you for headcanons, sends a prompt when prompts are closed, etc, and you don’t feel like fulfilling it? You have no obligation to do that. Getting commissioned is another story entirely, but as long as you’re making free content, you have zero obligation to do anything for anyone and certainly no time constraints. It can take me months to finish prompts, and that’s okay. I do them when I do them and I fill them how I want to. If my prompts are closed, I deny new ones until I’m ready to accept them. Make yourself happy first.

- How you interact with others is up to you! It’s generally considered good practice to like/reblog your mutuals fics/art, but this is not necessarily a hard and fast rule. I veeeeeery rarely reblog fics for fandoms that I’m not in, even from my mutuals. What you can do to show your support (and you should try and show support somehow. No one is in competition. Everyone’s in your boat, whether they have no followers or 1k) is send an ask/reply to the post/leave tags to let the author know you liked it. Like the fic and don’t reblog it, if you don’t want to. Just make sure you show your mutuals (and others in general!) roughly the same support they show you, however you decide to do that. Treat others how you want to be treated, as cheesy as it sounds :)

- Don’t repost content that isn’t yours without express permission from the original creator, and credit them appropriately. If you see a cute piece of tickle art and the artist doesn’t want it reposted? Don’t repost it. Don’t post fics/videos/gifs that aren’t yours (obviously if it’s like a scene from a movie/a clip on youtube that’s different, but don’t take credit for things you didn’t make, including ideas). Can’t tell you how frustrating it is to have work stolen from you. Don’t be that person. ‘Credit to original artist’ and ‘credit unknown’ is total bullshit btw. Link/tag the creator in the original post and make it clear you don’t own the content. Best practice is to ask the original creator if they’re okay with reposting, work inspired by or connected to theirs, etc. This goes doubly for saving/downloading someone’s fics. 

- It is not illegal for a minor to have normal, nonsexual, healthy friendships with people older than them. There’s a weird attitude that minors have nothing of value to offer adults besides a relationship/sex, which is...not true? Minors are thinking, living human beings with feelings, thoughts, and opinions. You can talk to them like normal people, because they are. Just obviously don’t talk about/introduce sex or endanger them. Minors don’t bring up sex/activities you’re underage for with an adult. IDK this isn’t a seminar just...don’t be weird. Adults can offer great life experience, support systems, and the basic joys and needs of human connection. Minors can too. Mind your business unless someone’s actually in danger. The next point is a caveat, though: 

- If you’re a minor, don’t interact with NSFW blogs/blogs with ‘Minors DNI’, NSFW blogs don’t interact with minors, etc etc. Not your parent or whatever but this is pretty common sense and it’s for everyone’s safety, but especially the NSFW person. internettiquette!

- If you use your TK blog as a side blog (meaning you have another blog as your main blog, not two separate accounts) and don’t want your main exposed, that is up to you. I recommend not liking posts. Also, follow people that you trust. These actions route through your main blog and your main will show up in the notes. You can reblog from a sideblog. If you want to send an ask “as your tk blog”, send an anon and sign it somehow, like ‘hey :) // @/tickle-bugs’. It should tag you in the post so you get a notification when it’s answered!

- Find your people! As an anxious person this one has been hard for me, so I know it’s hard for a lot of people. Fandom is literally a community of shared interest. Peachy and I have an iron bond almost two years later and we met talking over shared interests. You can absolutely find your people here. If someone makes you happy, strike up a conversation! Send an ask! You never know what doors it might open or whose day you might improve :)

- If you were an anon/lurker on someone’s blog and they inspired you to write/submit/start your own, sign your messages!! the common form that I see is either an emoji or [noun/context of the ask]!anon (prodigal!anon (i miss u every day), butterfly!anon, etc.) Let us know how to find and support you!! Those messages produce good brain juice. 

- The big finale: Have fun. If you’re not having fun here, maybe you could tweak something to make things enjoyable. Running a blog is like driving a car. Keep your hands on the wheel, respectfully indicate your intentions (flashing lights optional), and be safe. Poebody’s nerfect, y’know. If you make a mistake, course correct. I’m by no means perfect. Your favs aren’t either. Just do your best and have a good time :)

@rosytickles and the anon in my inbox, I hope this helps! Thank you for asking me, I’m very honored that you value my opinon/experience/advice. I apologize if I come off as preachy or aggressive, I envisioned grabbing my younger self by the lapels and shaking me vigorously while I wrote this. Probably a bad idea. 

Anywho, hope it helps. Anyone with questions, additions, or comments, my askbox is open! Just be constructive, is all I ask. 

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TW: Health anxiety, medical trauma.

Just looking for some kind words and maybe resources.

I struggled with health anxiety since childhood but it got worse after experiencing medical trauma as an adult, and for the first time finding out I had some real conditions as opposed to the ones I worried about. I always worried about having issues in one part of my body but my issues are not related to that part. Currently, I've been having a lot of bad thoughts. If I'm aware I'm going to undergo a change that might result in some temporary discomfort (like safe changes to my medication under a doctor's supervision), or I start experiencing physical symptoms that are real/unpleasant but not life-threatening in any way, I immediately go into catastrophe mode and start imagining the worst case scenarios. I'm sorry this is vague but when I think of more detailed examples, I get nervous typing them out. I feel like if another person was going through the same situation I'd be able to talk to them calmly about it and reassure them that they're going to be fine, but when it comes to myself, I can't. Are there any explanations for this, maybe tied to my trauma? How can I learn to cope with this?

Hi anon,

I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with health anxiety and experiencing distressing thoughts. It can be challenging to understand why we can offer reassurance to others but struggle to do the same for ourselves. I can see how the combination of your history of health anxiety and experiencing medical trauma as an adult may contribute to this.

The thing is that it's easier to reassure someone else when it's someone else experiencing their emotions informed by their own, well, experiences. When you're physically removed from the emotional or psychological aspect of a situation like this, it can be easy to simply give advice or consolation. But the reality is, as you may have observed yourself, that reassurance doesn't necessarily erase your medical trauma or health anxiety.

It can be helpful to seek help from a mental health professional such as a therapist, who can provide guidance and support. Additionally, practicing self-care, challenging negative thoughts, educating yourself about your health conditions from reliable sources, building a support network, and practicing self-compassion are all strategies that could help as well.

Please know that coping with health anxiety takes time and effort, so be patient with yourself. You're not alone in this, and there are resources available to help you on your journey towards managing health anxiety.

If anyone knows of any resources that might be useful, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[imagine-lcorp]

Cosa Nostra (One Shot)

A/N: Fuck...This is what happens when an anon comes to me with a Mob Boss Lena idea and I unconsciously decide to watch the Godfather Trilogy the same week...You got me this time, anon, you got me good, I hope you're happy now....Also, this was a good excuse to proctice the little italian I know, so sorry in advance for any mistake I make, feel free to correct me. Please enjoy!

Lena Luthor x R/Mob AU//Word Count: 1,339 -------------------------------------------------------

"E questa è un'offerta che non sì puo rifiutare, eh?" The man sitting in front of Lena's desk leaned back on his seat after she had spoken fidgeting with the half glass of wine on his hands.

"Potete naturalmente." You replied from your own seat in the corner with the most cordial tone you could muster. "But what we want you to understand, signore, is that we do not like violence. Miss Luthor is a woman of business, and blood is expensive. There's no need to waste any more of it."

The people in the room, his men and yours, looked at him expectantly as he took a deep breath. All except for Lena, who was seated with her legs crossed and her hands resting on the arms of her chair. She was only waiting for his resolution.

"Capisco." He said after another minute and took another sip of his wine.

All the men in the room readied themselves as the man stood up, leaving the glass on the near table, and moved to round Lena's desk.

"Signora, é un piacere fare affari con lei."

At his words, everyone in the room visibly relaxed and Lena nodded slowly. She offered him her hand, once he had reached her, and let him kiss the skin over her knuckles. With a little satisfied smirk, Lena looked at you. Your work was done.

"And just like that you have the last of Del Portenza Family at your service." You said as you stood in front of Lena's desk after the man, Mario Del Portenza, and his men had left the manor.

"I would like to think about it as a 'collaborazione'." She raised an eyebrow in amusement.

"I'm sure they will appreciate that." You smiled.

"They have to." She said with the grin on her lips getting bigger.

You remembered the way the head of Del Portenza Family had turned his face at you then, his dark tired eyes looking at you with a troubled frown. Lena had offered him a good deal indeed, one that could guarantee the peace between them. So he had known, as you did, there was no way he would have left that room if he had refused.

"Something else on the agenda?"

You hummed and put your hands in your pockets, already knowing how Lena would react at what you had to say. "Sinclair wants a meeting with you."

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not interested in any of her business. You know I don't like the kind of entertainment she offers. She knows it too. "

"In any case, you will have to tell her that directly." You pointed out.

"Is that your advice, consigliere?" She asked, remarking the last word.

"It is, if you want to stop receiving her invitations."

"Alright, arrange a meeting then." You nodded at her instruction. "Anything else?"

"Not really. Although I want to talk with you about... something."

"What is it?" You saw a small frown appear on Lena's features as she invited you to sit with a movement of her hand.

You moved to the chair where Del Portenza had been and took a seat. You were unsure about how to start the following conversation, knowing it would lead to a certain topic that, even when she denied it, still bothered Lena. However, it was your duty as her adviser to always discuss clearly and truthfully the matters that concerned her business and herself.

"Some of our people are concerned about Supergirl." You sighed. "As you know, she caught a few of our men during an operation a couple of weeks ago, right after she announced herself to the world. Now, they fear this might be a regular thing if she keeps popping around the city."

She seemed to meditate your words for a moment.

"I wouldn't concern myself with her that much, (Y/N)."

"But I have to." You raised an eyebrow. "She has power, and she could stop our entire business if she keeps sabotaging our operations."

"She might, but she won't." She leaned back on her chair. "I've been keeping tabs on her. You're right, she has power but what she's been doing has very little to do with the way we handle our business."

"How are you so sure?"

"Supergirl likes to fly around the city, in that little skirt and the symbol she wears on her chest, doing nothing more but stopping petty criminals and the occasional alien threat. She has the power to stop a few bullets and an outer-space invasion if she wants but there's no stopping what we do. Unless she manages to dismantle our whole network." You saw the little smile appear in Lena's lips again.

Lena was right. Your network consisted of a great deal of friends and acquaintances, from National City to most parts of the country. Judges, politicians, press members, bankers, heads of institutions and much more. Your operations weren't only domestic but international and Lena, as head of the Luthor Family and their multi-billion dollar company, had enough financial, social and political power as to not face any real legal consequences.

"But what if she comes directly after us?" You replied, taking a moment to look at Lena. "I don't want you facing a Krytonian in the same fashion your brother did."

The mention of her brother made Lena tense for second. He had died a bit less than six months ago in Metropolis after a direct clash with Superman.

The Man of Steel had actually managed to dismantle some of Lex's business in the city by destroying a couple of his underground facilities and exposing all the big names that were involved with the help of one of the few honest reporters left in Metropolis.

As his consigliere back then, you had suggested taking some precautions, including sending a message to the Daily Planet and the ace reporter who had published the revealing article, Clark Kent. But it wasn't enough for Lex. Superman was a dangerous variable and you knew how much he hated when people didn't behave according to his big plans. He needed to eliminate Superman and, in trying to do so, he had been reckless.

"Lex's obsession with Superman was his downfall. It won't be mine." She said reassuring herself.

Your eyes followed as Lena moved a hand behind her desk, opening the drawer that you knew had a small safe installed. "If my brother did something right before facing Superman, it was his research."

You listened when the safe opened and watched as Lena pulled a leather box from it. She leaned over the desk to place it in front of you and lifted the lid. Inside, a revolver rested with six green-tipped bullets at its side. It made you wonder if that green material was what Lex had been so impatient to get from his little investment in the Indian Ocean. Whatever that was, anyway, you figured it would come in handy against Kryptonians.

"If the Girl of Steel decides to come after us, we will be more than ready." Lena closed the box and moved it back into the safe. "So tell the boys there's nothing to worry about."

Lena, unlike the rest of the family, had always been more centered. She had loved her brother dearly, and his death was a great grief to her but she understood, better than anyone, that Lex's only mistake had been making his problems with Superman about himself. Lena wouldn't antagonize the Supers by pursuing a vendetta for her brother, but she was going to protect her interests.

"Still, we cannot be careless." You said in a stern voice. You cared too much about Lena to let anything happen to her. "You cannot be careless."

She smiled again at your concerned tone and pulled herself out of her chair. She walked behind you and put her hands on your shoulders, lowering herself, so she could whisper in your ear.

"Non ti preocupare, amore mio. Fidati di me." She placed a kiss on your cheek, putting your mind at ease.

"Sempre." You smiled.

[dindjarindiaries]

Dead to Me

summary: On the verge of death, Twila takes off Din’s helmet, later having to face his wrath and leave his ship—even though she’s pregnant with their unborn child. (requested by anon)

pairing: din djarin (the mandalorian) x f!oc

warnings: blood, mentions of death/near-death, angst, fluff

rating: T

word count: 2.64k

main masterlist • din djarin masterlist

He’s dying. I’m gonna lose him. I can’t lose him.

These words play in the back of Twila’s mind like a sick song, tormenting her as she attempts to work quickly on the limp body in front of her. But it’s hard to fix a man who’s unconscious and unable to show his face—especially when it’s the man she loves.

Twila’s been a part of the Mandalorian’s crew for longer than she’s kept track of. It’s been hard to keep track when they’ve been running around the galaxy, anyway. She was meant to be a babysitter of sorts for the child, a caretaker for whenever the Mandalorian had to go on jobs. This quickly, however, turned into her being a caretaker for both of them. He had accepted this, and it made them grow even closer—so close that she was surprised she ever got so far. When she first met him, she never thought she’d be able to penetrate the beskar in any manner.

Now, she’s seen it all—everything except his face.

He even revealed his name. Din’s the name that rolls off her lips when Twila beckons him, when she tells him that she loves him, when she’s a victim of the pure pleasure in which they share. It’s beautiful to her: it’s become her personal chant of exquisite admiration, the word that encapsulates everything she cares for now. After living a lonely childhood spent in the Outer Rim with absent parents and many children in the village that she would care for, Twila’s finally found a family of her own that she can not only continue to care for but also receive the same attention in return. The child feels like one of her own, and Din feels like an extension of herself, a faithful companion.

He’s done a lot for her. He’s continued to risk his life on jobs to keep them supplied. He’s tried to teach her how to fight to help her fend for herself should she ever have to. He’s jumped in front of blaster shots for her.

And now, he may be dying for her.

Twila had been too careless during their venture into the marketplace. She hadn’t paid attention to their surroundings. When the hunter threw that detonator near her, she hadn’t even heard it. All she saw was Din shoving her aside before almost jumping on it himself to block her from the blow, resulting in him being tossed through the air and hard against the ground. He hasn’t moved on his own since.

Thankfully, Twila made sure he bought bacta spray the last time they supplied the med kit. She knows this would work on anything it needed to, but she’s come across a problem: she needs to spray it on his head. There’s blood trailed down the back of his neck, a sure sign of trauma done underneath the helmet. But she can’t; he’s told her this many times, and she’s understood. She’s never pressured him to break the Creed.

But what the hell kind of option does she have now?

He can’t die. Din doesn’t know it yet, but he has a future with her—one that’ll be undeniable. It started growing in her stomach not too long ago. After some strange bodily behaviors and curiosity, she’d found a way to test what was going on, and it came back just as she thought. She’s now expecting another child for them to look after on board. She’s been trying to figure out how to tell him. Now, she could be too late, and she can’t bear letting him die without even knowing the potential of what’s ahead of them.

Twila fights with herself repetitively, going back and forth on which choice to make. It’s a lose-lose situation: take off the helmet, forcing Din to break his Creed, or leave it on, which is letting him die. The worst part is she can’t even ask anyone for advice. She’s on her own.

With shaking hands, Twila makes her choice. She hopes it’s what he’d choose, too. Slowly, she reaches for the now-grimy helmet, her mind and heart moving at a mile a minute as she does so. They pause when they rest on the sides of the helmet, as if reconsidering everything once again.

He’ll hate you.

But he’ll die.

He wouldn’t want you to do this.

But you have to save him.

Twila suddenly hears the child coo beside her. Her head turns to look at him, and she sees him lay his tiny hand on her thigh in a comforting manner. His ears perk up at her as he tilts his head, as if trying to make her feel at ease. She nods, looking back at Din and finally beginning to pull the helmet up. Inch by inch, more of her love is revealed, and despite the gruesome circumstances of the situation, she finds her heart melting at the sight of everything she’s wanted to see—and the sheer beauty of it all.

Din’s skin is scratched and bloody, but behind it all, she can still see his handsome face. He’s not clean shaven, but also not terribly far from it, the small whiskers of hair sticking around chaotically from the blood. His lips are slightly parted, likely to allow his body some air in its unconscious state, and his delicate eyelids shield the color that lies behind them.

Twila releases a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding, blinking a few times to clear her mind as she moves for the bacta spray. She sprays it generously on his bloody head, applying it until she’s sure she’s gotten every spot she needs to. Once she sets it aside, she begins to work on his cuts, gently cleaning the blood away and applying whatever creams and gels are necessary to get the healing process working quickly.

The bacta spray works fast, and just as she finishes clearing the blood, she sees Din’s eyes flutter open. His dark gaze observes Twila through hooded eyelids, as if they’re too heavy for him to open all the way just yet. Her heart races at the eye contact, as she’s never truly gotten to have it before—and it feels as if the rest of her soul is finally being entwined with his. She warmly welcomes the window into her heart, hoping she’ll be able to see his in return.

“Cyar’ika?” Din’s weak voice offers, as if he’s trying to confirm what he’s seeing.

Twila nods tearfully. “I’m here, Din.” She places both of her hands over one of his gloved ones.

Din almost begins to smile, causing her heart to leap, but it quickly fades. It’s replaced with an expression that makes her skin crawl at the pure horror he shows. He blinks a few times, his eyes finally widening to a normal size. “You��You’re so clear—.” Din cuts himself off, his free hand touching his head. When his gloved fingers brush against the bare skin on his temple instead of his helmet, his brow instantly furrows in a menacing manner. “Where’s the helmet?”

Twila widens her own eyes, seized by the terror of what he’ll do now. “It’s right here,” she assures him, gesturing to the helmet on the floor of the ship beside her. “I’m sorry, Din, I know I’m not supposed to, but I didn’t know how else—.”

“I don’t want to hear it.” Din’s voice is low and sounds practically like a growl. Twila jumps back a bit upon hearing it, releasing his hand as she does so. “You knew. I told you.”

Her eyes continue to tear up in her desperation, and she feels the child grip her leg tighter at her evident distress. “You were dying, Din.” Her voice is hauntingly quiet. “I couldn’t just let that happen to you. I—I had to at least try to save you.”

Din’s silent for a moment, his jaw clenched as his gaze pierces through her in a hostile manner. Twila feels herself beginning to shake again in fear. “No, you didn’t. You…” he pauses, looking up at the ceiling as if he can’t handle looking at her anymore, “… you should’ve let me die.”

A hot tear runs down her cheek as she grits her own teeth, trying to plead her case. “How? How could I have done that, Din? You know how much you mean to me, to the kid! You expected me to just sit here and let you die in front of both of us?”

“How many times have I told you, Twi, that this is what could happen? And how many times did you assure me that it’d be okay, that you understood?” Din looks back at Twila, his dark gaze losing all traces of light as it looks upon her almost menacingly. “Clearly, you didn’t.”

Twila shakes her head in an utter loss for words. When she thinks of some, they’re not useful, but it’s all she can manage. “I’m sorry, Din. I’m so sorr—.”

“Don’t call me that.” Din spits the words like venom. His hands, stronger now from the fast-working bacta spray, reach for his helmet and slip it back over his head. “It’s Mando.”

Another tear escapes her eye as Twila gives another shake of her head in desperation. “Please don’t do this. I just—I couldn’t live without you.” When Din says nothing in response, she continues to ramble. “I guess… I guess I’d rather have you alive and hating me than have you be dead.”

Din’s still quiet for a moment, but when he speaks, Twila’s sure she feels every single vein of her heart being ripped away piece by piece. “It’s a shame. Now you’re the one who’s dead to me.”

Twila lets a hand cover her mouth to keep the sobs tucked in. He can’t see her fall apart like this. She’s brought it upon herself. When she regains some of her composure, she swallows hard, looking around the ship. “I understand.”

Din tilts his helmet at her. “Then start packing.”

Twila looks back to Din with disbelief. “What?”

“If you understand, then you’ll get what this means. You betray my trust, then you can’t be a part of my crew.”

She stops trying to hold back the tears. They fall as steady as rainwater from the dark cloud that now surrounds her mind and heart. “Your crew? Is that all I am, now? What about all we had?”

Din’s stiff for a moment, and when he speaks, it’s cold. “You should’ve thought about that before you stripped my identity from me. Someone who truly loves me would never do that.”

Twila chokes on a sob, biting her lip to try to keep it hidden. She decides to say nothing, knowing her words of denial would only go in one of his ears and out the other. Twila’s never had many belongings, feeling that she didn’t need much other than her two companions, and everything suddenly feels so empty as she collects whatever she has into the pouch she’d purchased at a marketplace on one of the first planets she’d stopped at with Din. With a heavy sigh, she heads for the hatch, seeing Din now standing with the child in his arms. She gives them a weary smile.

“You should know that no matter what you might think because of this, Din, I love you.”

Twila sees Din clench one of his fists. “Leave.”

She refuses to budge, knowing this may be the last time she ever gets to talk to him. “I’ll always be in love with you, and I’ll always keep myself tied to you. You’re always—”

“I said, leave.”

“—going to be with me, no matter how far away you try to run. I’ll always have a piece of you with me, forever.”

“Leave!”

At the sound of his yelling, which she’s never heard directed towards her, something snaps within her, and she retaliates with the same amount of emotional hostility. “We’re going!” Her burning eyes finally turn away indignantly, and she reaches for the button on the hatch when Din’s voice makes her stop.

“’We?’”

Twila’s eyes widen upon realizing what she’s accidentally revealed. Her hand falls slowly back to her side, and she turns around to see that Din’s put the child back on the floor and is now facing her with a tilted helmet. She takes a heavy breath, her nerves spiking as she stares at his visor. “Yes. We.” Twila rests a hand on her stomach, which hasn’t started showing quite yet. “I saved you not only because I love you, but because I wanted you to be able to meet your future child. But don’t worry, we’re going.”

She turns back around and opens the hatch, feeling her heart race quickly as it lowers slowly onto the ground. Her gaze is burning again with tears, but she blinks them back. Twila understands why she has to leave, that she broke his trust—and for a man of his lifestyle, you can’t have someone around who does that—but it still pains her. However, before she’s even able to take a step down the ramp, a gloved hand stops her by wrapping around her arm. She looks over her shoulder, seeing Din standing just behind her. His hand falls from her arm, and instead he falls—his knee just barely catching him as he practically collapses to the ground. His shoulders heave as sounds like sobs come through his modulator, a sound Twila’s never heard from him before. It twists her heart in the worst way as she instantly kneels in front of him.

“Hey, hey,” Twila soothes gently, worried by his utterly weakened composure. She forgets the ferocity with which he’d treated her just moments before, only feeling the caretaker side as she places her hands on his shoulders. “Breathe, Din. Are you alright?”

His hands reach back towards his helmet, and Twila’s shocked to see him lifting it back up and over his head. Din throws it to the side, hearing it clang! against the metal floor as it hits it—hard. His dark eyes are glistening with tears as they look at her, his cheeks wet and his lips trembling as he stares at her for a few speechless moments. “I… can’t do this.” Din pauses, swallowing hard as he tries to find words. “If I have a child coming into this world, I can’t live like this anymore.” He takes her hands in his own, pulling them to his chest as he looks deep in her gaze. “Please stay.”

Twila nods right away, giving him a small smile. “We will, Din.” She bites back tears, looking at him with all the true emotion she can muster. “I’m so sorry. I—.”

“No need, cyar’ika.” Din comes closer to her, until—for the first time ever—his lips brush over hers, sending a feeling through her like nothing before. “I love you, no matter what.” Knowing how she feels, he doesn’t give her a chance to answer before he places his lips fully against hers, causing everything around her to melt away as she absorbs the sweet and relieving feeling she’s always craved. He only pulls away to lean his forehead against hers, finally showing her the smile she’s been picturing in her mind all this time. “Both of you.”

main masterlist • din djarin masterlist

[kindofwriter]

Hey there! My group of friends have been hardcore considering turning a passion project of ours into a real podcast, and I was wondering if you had any advice for newbies putting together a show. We’re a small, young team, but we have a lot of passion for our concept and some writing/sound experience under our belts. Do you have any tips regarding finding actors, the process of plotting, sensitivity readers, or anything else you’ve had experience with in your projects? Thanks for reading!

Ok, finally ready with this! Thank you so much for the question, I will try to share my ~wisdom~ in the following post, but feel free to ask any further questions!

How to start a podcast: 1. when you’re new and/or 2. when you have money!

1. It’s easier than you think! My first advice is to just go for it! Even if it doesn’t quite go as planned you’ll have fun, and it’ll give you great experience for whatever you want to work on next!

Casting:

I’m going to assume this is an unpaid project (hence the former part of this advice being for free podcasting!) but if that’s not the case please skip to section two!

When I can’t offer any form of payment for a project I like to use friends as a cast. Not because my friends deserve any less payment! But because I can pay them in free chips and credentials for their portfolios, and it makes me feel slightly less bad!

Ways to go about deciding which friends to cast: I was lucky enough to do a lot of theatre work in my first year of uni, so I already knew a lot of people who were interested in both acting and production work. You’ll probably come across several actors who think voice acting is beneath them, but who wants to be friends with those people? What I’m trying to say is: if you have friends who are interested in theatre they’ll probably be interested in this! Especially given the past year.

I also poached people from my DnD group, because I could already gauge their acting specialities from that, and I knew what kinds of things they were interested in based on which DnD campaigns they enjoyed best.

If you know anyone who is interested in public speaking, whatever you all those reading awards where you read aloud dramatically, or something like radio and TV presenting then they’ll probably also be interested and do a great job! The great thing about podcasts is that all you really need is someone with a good voice - they’re free to do whatever they like with the rest of their face as long as they’re reading the lines!

You can, of course, also put out a casting call. It’s very important that you make it clear that it would be unpaid work. Even if you plan to set up a kofi, patreon, or kickstarter (info in the money section!), if you don’t have the money to begin with you shouldn’t promise it to people.

There are up and downsides to both. Casting people you know means you’re more likely to be comfortable working with them, there’s less pressure to offer payment, and your cast are more likely to have free time specifically for this project. However, you won’t have the draw of casting known industry voices, and (like I found!) your cast may not have any social media engagement whatsoever!

If you put out a casting call you’re more likely to get a pool of diverse voices, it will likely be people invested (even if not plugged in) to the industry, and you can request that they have their own equipment! However, you then have to work with people you don’t know, a level of professionalism that isn’t usually present on first time projects may be expected, and unpaid casting calls are not wildly well received.

Personally, for your first show, I’d try to use as many friends, or even friends-of-friends as possible. That being said, if you want advice on putting together an audition pack let me know!

Plotting:

It depends on what kind of show you’re aiming to write, but in general plotting a podcast is kind of like plotting a TV show. First of all you should plot out what’s going to happen in a season. Then plot out what’s going to happen in each episode. Ideally each episode will have its own arc, but things don’t always work out like that.

I like to plan things out in a fair amount of detail beforehand (this is especially helpful if you’re writing collaboratively.) Start with what’s going to happen in each episode. Once I know that, I then like to write how it starts and finishes, then the content in bullet points. If you ever can’t think of anything then don’t worry! A lot of things really come together when you’re actually writing.

The most important thing is to not worry at all about the first draft. Just get it down, editing is much easier and more fun once you have something to work with!

There are definitely much more qualified people than me out there giving advice about writing and plotting though; even if it’s directed at prose and script writers it’s still more than applicable!

Sensitivity readers:

If you have the option of sensitivity readers they’re always a great idea! But asking someone to read your work (usually for free) is both time consuming and potentially risky if you don’t know and trust them.

Tumblr, the writeblr community specifically, is a good place to find a sensitivity reader. A lot of people want the practise and are willing to do it for free if you put a call out.

One of the best ways to get feedback on your work is to cast/find people who are appropriate for the roles and then ask for feedback. Obviously they don’t have to, but you’ll find that usually they want to. You can aid in this by giving them some way to give feedback anonymously - maybe a google form - as no matter how chill and friendly you are as the prod team you will always be seen as In Charge.

If you don’t feel right asking someone, especially from a marginalised group, to read and comment on your work for free, you can always just ask general questions in forums or on social media. This isn’t as reliable, as people can lie online, but if you find the right communities and explain you just want to portray characters as accurately as possible there will always be people willing to offer some help. Reddit, for all its flaws, builds great communities, though remember to check the rules to make sure people outside of whatever group they’re aiming to support are allowed to post.

Of course, the first step to writing anything outside of your own experience is a tonne of research. The sensitivity reader should be picking up on small things, not telling you the basics of their experiences. And everyone’s experiences are different, which makes this even tougher! You can get things so spot on for a handful of people whilst inadvertently offending others. Be prepared to be adaptable and take on criticism, but also remember that you don’t have to bend to everyone’s whim; one person saying ‘but this wasn’t my experience!!’ doesn’t mean you’ve done a bad job.

Equipment:

I know you didn’t ask, but this was what I found scariest when I was Brand New.

If you have the money and you’re very serious about this I haven’t encountered a single person who wouldn’t recommend a Blue Yeti mic. However when you’re just starting out, and especially if you’re not planning to have all of your cast together record together/separately but with the same mic, blowing over $100 on a mic is huge, scary, and not always feasible.

I have three small desk mics that I loan out to my cast when needed. They cost ~£30 ($40) from (ew, I know) Amazon. You don’t need a mic for each cast member - you don’t even need a mic for the max number of character speaking in a scene at once. You could probably do it all with one mic, but the time that would take and the affect it would have on scenes may be worth the extra cost! These obviously don’t produce the crisp quality a professional recording mic would, but they have a pop filter and a windscreen and seem to do a good job at reducing background static.

Further noise reduction: Mr Alexander Jalexander Newall, when starting his podcast empire half a decade ago, got it in one: blanket forts.

If you can build a little fabric den for your cast to record in: perfect! If not, tell them just to stick a duvet over their head. This increases the risk of moving duvet sounds, but reduces everything else! And if they shift under the blanket you can always ask them to get comfortable then read the lines again.

And, info courtesy of the McElroys: you can also record in a wardrobe or a room with plenty of bookshelves if you don’t want to build the world’s most bangin’ blanket fort.

The most important advice you will ever receive:

Don’t be scared to ask for help! Join Facebook groups and ask questions! Join discord servers! Message people on Twitter and ask for advice (certain ppl are much more amenable to this than others, but this is pretty clear from their Vibe)! Heck, you can message me on Twitter (or here. Or send another anon. And if I don’t know the answer I’ll ask someone who does!) Everyone just wants to help everyone else, and if they don’t they’re probably not the kind of people you want to associate with. Good luck! And let me know once you socials are up, so I can follow and get excited!

Now, onto 2. Money stuff!

A lot of the info stays the same, but money kind of raises the stakes. Once money’s involved, especially once money and people you don’t know so well are involved, suddenly you have to operate like a business.

Casting:

If you’re planning to pay actors proper wages from the get-go you probably want to put out a casting call. Paid work will attract professionals, and professionals will not only do a great job, but will also help you gain an audience (and have their own equipment!)

You get to decide what the hourly rate is, but usually, depending on where you’re from, there is an average hourly rate voice actors get paid, and if you’re nowhere close to that people will be put off.

You should also make clear what the hourly rate includes: whether it is just recorded audio hours, or includes table reads and directorial time. A lot of people just have every actor record their lines separately, sometimes without direction, then edit them all together. This certainly saves on cost, and makes for a quick turnaround, but it’s no fun, and sometimes makes the show kind of soulless.

Kickstarters:

You can run a kickstarter on an unpaid project, in the hopes of eventually paying the cast and maybe funding future seasons. But I’m going to assume this is advice for ‘I can pay the cast, but what is a kickstarter for?’

Well, that’s up to you! It can be for equipment, for better editing, for podcast music, for podcast art, for a pay rise for the team, for bonus content. Depending on how many stretch goals you have, it can be for all of these things!

In short: backers give money, and get things in return, for example $5 might get you a pin badge, while $100 might get you a signed poster. When the kickstarter reaches a certain goal, maybe $5,000, then the team may then have enough money to produce a holiday special, for example. At $10,000 everyone on the team may get a 10% pay rise.

This is a great way to get people invested in the show, and a great way to make money! But if you want a really great kickstarter you’ll probably want to hire someone with experience in this area.

Contracts:

Money means contracts! Usually two will suffice, they just need edited for each individual team member:

An NDA, to prevent people from discussing the show in any inappropriate situations.

And a literal workplace contract.

You’ll be able to search how to draft these online, but it’s useful to have the help of a lawyer. There are people who do this specifically for podcasts who’ll be able to help you out, but again: you have to pay them!

Equipment:

As I said, actors will probably have their own equipment, but if you want them all recording together: you can rent a studio! They’ll already have all the equipment for you, which is The Dream!

Or you can convert a room into your own studio! Get some soundproof panelling on the walls and invest in a good mixer. I’m afraid I don’t have much advice on this, as I cannot afford anything close to a good mixer! But there are plenty of articles online with helpful information.

I wouldn’t recommend making a paid podcast as your first project, as it’s a lot of pressure, and would almost definitely mean bringing new people onto even the production side of things. There’s always the option to work on another project first, something smaller-scale, to work out any roadblocks you may run into during the paid show. But I’m not telling anyone what to do: if you’re ready, go for it!

Anyway, this was very long and quite rambly, and is probably filled with things you don't actually need to know! But I hope at least some of it was useful! Please feel free to ask any other questions - now or in future, PM or anon - and again: best of luck! I'm so excited for you!

[ouyangzizhensdad]

I'm reading through some of your meta and in the one about WWX possibly weaponizing MXY being gay you mention how MXY being a molester was fabricated. I agree with this but I always thought that this was a personal headcanon and didn't realize that it was supported by canon. If you're up to it, please may you point me to where it might say this?

Hi anon, 

I’m sad to report that there isn’t a scene where JGY admits before a jury that yes, it was I, I fabricated the claims against Mo Xuanyu, who was a hapless victim all along! which would be convenient for winning arguments quickly and easily. But, I promise you, so long as we read between the lines, it is undeniable that we are meant to understand by the end of the novel that the accusations leveled against Mo Xuanyu were baseless and that he was another victim of JGY’s (and NHS’s!) machinations.

Beyond a purely thematic reading of the novel, which would  therefore highlight  that the theme around how public opinion is willing to believe accusations and condemn without material or sensible proof (particularly so when it comes to people who do not hold a lot of power within society, those who are the Other) is one that is repeated across many characters, the narrative reveal of JGY’s true personality and actions indicates that the accusations against MXY were just  another ploy of JGY’s. 

At the very beginning of the novel, when WWX looks through Mo Xuanyu’s things, he’s able to piece out together that Mo Xuanyu’s “lunacy” seemed rooted in a deep and paranoiac fear of.... something. MXY didn’t just get thrown out of the Sect in disgrace--something clearly happened to him, or he clearly witnessed something that scared him out of his senses. 

“after he returned, he seemed to have gone completely mad—although no one could tell what kind of shock he’d suffered. He had good days and bad ones. It was as if he had been scared witless.” [Chapter 1]

Further into the novel, it is revealed that MXY didn’t actually harass his “peers” but actually only one person: Jin Guangyao. Right after this reveal, we also learn that MXY used to treat JGY with the utmost respect and deference. While Jin Ling seems to misunderstand this past deification of JGY as a side-effect of MXY’s presumed feelings for him, as readers we can see how it actually raises doubts into the claims leveraged against MXY, as it would then seem very out of character for MXY to disrespect JGY by harassing him (especially if one considers that the risks of harassing his powerful half-brother definitely would not outweigh the benefits....).

“Don’t listen to [JGY],” said Wei Wuxian. “Let me tell you—when you grow older, you’ll find out that there are more and more people you want to beat up, but you’ll have to force yourself to get along with them nicely. So, since you’re still young, go beat up all the people you want. At such an age, if you don’t have a few proper fights, your life won’t be complete.”

Jin Ling’s face betrayed faint yearning, yet he still sounded contemptuous, “What are you talking about? Shushu’s advice is for my own good.”

After he spoke, he suddenly remembered that the past Mo Xuanyu had always regarded Jin Guangyao as a deity. He definitely would not have disagreed with Jin Guangyao in any way. Yet, now he was saying not to listen to him. Was it that he really did not hold any improper thoughts toward Jin Guangyao anymore?

(we also learn that Zewu-jun never knew about what supposedly happened, or even who MXY was, which again.....fishy.... JGY what are you hiding...... not mentioning someone harassed you to your bff is one thing, but not introducing him to your half-bro?.... )

Then! Almost right after we learn all this new information, it is also revealed through WWX’s paperman adventures and NMJ’s adventures that JGY is not who he has presented himself to be: he is a master manipulator, who has lied and continues to lie to preserve his position and to eliminate people he perceives as threatening the place he carved for himself in sweat and tears and blood. 

At this point, the deal is pretty much sealed: we have an unreliable witness in the man we now know to be able to do incredibly scary and cruel things (a knowledge that will only be reinforced by the end of the novel once NHS’ plan is completed). What actually happened, how MXY went from someone who deified JGY to someone who would need to be sent away in disgrace and scared into silence and compliance, all this is not told to us by the novel. It is possible that JGY might have seen MXY as a potential accomplice to his deeds (like he did his other half-brother, XY) (EDIT: I DREAMED UP THAT XY was one of JGS’s bastard children, please disregard it), or that he might have seen MXY as a potential threat to his position because of they shared a father--honestly, I can see many possibilities here! 

Also, it is important to consider that even the claim of MXY’s “lunacy”  is pretty fraught and ambiguous. The novel ends up setting up the idea that MXY’s erratic behaviour was related to him being scared (as we see in the and frustrated at the injustice he received at the hands of both the Jin Sect and his family (for example, this piece of shino meta)

Finally, it’s a good time to remember that even MXY’s sacrifice was not a decision he made on his own: he was once again the victim of a mastermind with much more power and influence than he could ever dream to have. After all, the novel takes pain to explain to us that NHS’s schemes for revenge depended on MXY sacrificing himself (passage under the cut because this post is getting long!)

“Nie-zongzhu,” Wei Wuxian asked again. “I heard that you often travel between the Gusu Lan sect and the Lanling Jin sect, am I right?”

“That’s right.”

“Then did you really not recognize Mo Xuanyu?”

“Ah?” Nie Huaisang’s face twitched slightly. 

“I remember that the first time I met you after my soul had been offered into his body, you acted as if you did not recognize me, and even asked Hanguang-jun who I was. Mo Xuanyu was then entangled anyhow with Jin Guangyao during that time* and was able to access even his secret collections, and you often went to find Jin-zongzhu to complain. Even if you and Mo Xuanyu were not familiar with each other, did you really not see him before at all?”

Nie Huaisang scratched his head, saying, “Wei-xiong, Jinlintai is so huge, I can’t possibly recognize everyone, even if I’ve seen them, I can’t remember. Moreover…” 

Looking rather awkward, he continued, “You know about Mo Xuanyu’s identity back then, it’s slightly…...the Lanling Jin sect had tried their best to hide it, so it wouldn’t have been surprising if I had never met him before. Even Xichen-ge may not have met him before.”

“Oh, that’s true. Zewu-jun did not know who Mo Xuanyu was either.”

“Right! And what I don’t understand is, even if I had seen Mo Xuanyu before, why would I pretend not to recognize him? Was there such a need?”

Wei Wuxian laughed and replied, “Nothing much, I just thought it strange and was casually asking. 

However, he thought, He was simply trying to see whether the ‘Mo Xuanyu’ he met was the real one.

For someone who was said to have been cowardly and weak, where would have Mo Xuanyu gotten the courage to sacrifice himself and offer his soul?

And as for Chifeng-zun’s left hand, why was it discarded? It could not be that Jin Guangyao would accidentally lose it.

Moreover, why was it that it happened to appear right at the Mo family residence, just when Wei Wuxian had been reincarnated, but not somewhere else? 

If Chifeng-zun’s body had been buried by the QingheNie sect, would Nie Huaisang, who had always respected his older brother, not notice that his body had disappeared all these years?

Wei Wuxian was inclined to believe an alternative situation. 

[...]

As such, [NHS] thought of another person; Mo Xuanyu, who had just been kicked out of the Golden Pavilion. 

Perhaps in order to let Mo Xuanyu listen to him, Nie Huaisang had already spoken to him before and heard from an upset and anguished Mo Xuanyu that he had seen one of Jin Guangyao’s scrolls of forbidden spells recording a certain ancient demonic spell. He then took advantage of the Mo Xuanyu, who was then humiliated and bullied by his clan, to persuade him to perform the spell as revenge**. 

And which fierce corpse would he summon?

Naturally, he would summon the Yiling Patriarch.

Unable to bear the days of humiliation any longer, Mo Xuanyu finally drew the array, and Nie Huaisang also took the chance to throw out the hot potato that was burning his hand: ChiFeng-Zun’s left arm.

From there on, his plan had begun and he no longer had to spend his own time and energy to find Nie Mingjue’s remaining body, leaving the dangerous and troublesome job to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. All he had to do was watch their actions closely. [Chapter 109]

*I changed the translation here, which originally said that “Mo Xuanyu was harassing Jin Guangyao” since I find (at least with my limited linguistic skills lmao) that the original is much more ambivalent. The clause is  莫玄羽当年好歹也纠缠过金光瑶, and the use of  好歹 signals to me toward ambivalence, which is further compounded by the fact that the verb  纠缠 does not necessarily translate to harassment. So I doubt that the original intent was to suggest that WWX was saying to NHS: shouldn’t you have known the dude who was harassing JGY? Anyone who knows Chinese more than I do is free to come and correct me if I am completely wrong in my assessment.

**Okay I changed the translation here again because the translation I was working with made it seem as if MXY was motivated by shame? but the original Chinese says  他便怂恿当时饱受族人欺辱的莫玄羽 which to me clearly points to his treatment by the Mo family/clan and to the fact that it was something being done unto him, not a state of mind he had.