#if a homophobe would take a look at a guy and go Ew Fag then you going Ew Twink because of the exact same features just seems!!!!
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Tbh the way people on this website(/presumably other websites too but this is the one on which I see strangers opinions most often) talk about twinks soooooo derogatorily really Does make me super uncomfortable. It feels really homophobic in a way I haven't been able to nail down precisely
But just like. Always using twink as a derogatory thing and undesirable both to be or to want. Not really outright saying twinks aren't real men but IMPLYING it through comparisons to Real Men that are Big and Strong And Hairy. Like okay? You want big muscle men? You and every mainstream media in existence...? Why are people pretending that hating twinks is subversive. Why are people pretending that twinks are widely seen as the best sort of man.
And like it's EXPECTED for men to be able to grow lots of body hair and to get lots of muscle and be thick and sturdy and strong. And men are shamed for not being hairy enough and they are shamed for being twiggy and WHY are you doing it MORE but using gay words. Saying bears are sooooooo great but twinks are sooooo icky doesn't magically make you Not body shaming a group of people for Exactly The Reasons They Are Already Bodyshamed
Idk. Bwah. This isn't even me being firsthand butthurt bc I don't actually think I would be seen as a twink? But I am so tired of feeling like a fake gay and looked down on for not really being very into the typical male beauty standards
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gra-antee · 6 years ago
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Somebody asked if I had a story about that picture from the party episode and I accidentally deleted the ask, sorry, here it is;
Yep!
Are you sure we belong here?
It was Ray's close friend birthday, and Ray always would go there alone.
But not that night.
Kevin sighed sighed, looking at the mirror.
- Raymond, are you sure it's a good idea? I mean, I know you want to come, but I don't know anyone in there and we're not sure if people will accept it, and-
- Kevin, I assure you, it will be alright. I told you many times that you shouldn't think so much about what will others say. If anyone dares to touch you, I'll protect you and you know that, if that happens well immideatly go home. Just try not to worry and have fun, I'll be there with you the whole time. - Holt turned to his boyfriend, placing his hands on Kevin's shoulders.
- yeah... maybe... - Kevin said, sighing.
He was afraid. He never could even simply start holding hands with Raymond on public, even if he truly wanted to. Sometimes, fortunately, Ray took the initiative. Kevin was glad Holt wasn't as scared as he was.
- We will be fine, - Raymond smiled softly and kissed his boyfriend's forehead. Cozner let out a little smile.
Everything is going to be just fine.
Right?...
***
Kevin was nervous as hell, but he took Raymond's hand and walked in the building. Now the light, people and music surrounded him. Cozner stepped a little closer to Holt, hugging his arm.
- There are so many people in here... - He said silently.
Raymond wasn't quick enough to respond - mostly because someone appeared in front of them.
- Raymond! - The man smiled widely.
- Hello, Henry. I congratulate you with this date, - Raymond said politely.
- Thank you. I see you're not alone for the first time? - Henry smiled even wider.
- Yes, his is my boyfriend, Kevin. Kevin, this is Henry, - Ray said, introducing the two.
- Greetings. My congratulations, - said Kevin pretty quietly.
- Thank you, I'm glad you two here. Please, come in, - Henry led them to the living room, then he had to leave them to speak with someone.
- See? I told you it wont be that bad. - Holt said, looking at his boyfriend.
- It sounds stupid, but I still have a bad feeling. - Cozner shook his head, still not letting go of Ray.
Actually, it really wasn't that bad. For some time they were talking with each other, then someone joined their conversation and didn't even seem disgusted by being around them. Kevin started (mostly made himself) to relax a bit. Maybe everything really will be okay. Maybe his intuition was wrong.
They were drinking and talking. Raymond told his best jokes, and now Kevin almost forgot about his fear, just wanting to be near this man for all his life. These eyes, an almost invisible, and yet soft smile, his personality and just every part of him.
It all belongs to Kevin. And every part of Kevin belongs to Ray. And Kevin didn't really mind it.
Raymond rarely believed that everything could go very very wrong, yet he didn't exclude this option. But he felt that his boyfriend is really a bit too pessimistic and scared about these things. Now it's legal and now some people do understand that. Even if no, Ray will be able to protect both of them - he's a policeman, for God's sake!
And he won't let anything happen to HIS Kevin. Kevin will be happy and safe, he will laugh and smile, and no one will touch him.
Ray looked at the woman, who stared at them in complete shock.
And disgust.
Kevin still didn't notice her. Maybe it's even better if he won't.
Raymond now felt how almost everybody were looking at them. Is that the feeling that Kevin gets when he's in a situation like that?
It's not pleasant. And Holt saw Cozner notice something happening.
Kevin squeezed his hand a bit, after the man who was talking to them had gone.
- Are you sure we belong here? - He asked quietly, looking around at the people's judging looks.
- Don't worry. Of course we belong here. - Raymond responded, wrapping his arm around his boyfriend's shoulder.
Henry saved the situation, joining them. Kevin sighed with relief.
Mostly the man was talking to Holt - Ray could understand, why. Kevin is nervous, scared and he's in the new company. Cozner never talked too much in these situations.
- Kevin, would you tell me about yourself? While talking to Raymond I heard about you, you seem to be quite interesting to talk to, - Henry smiled widely, turning his face to Cozner.
- Uh, alright... Well, I was a journalist in New York Times, but recently I've got the work in Columbia University. Now I'm a PHD.
- How'd you two meet? - Henry asked, still smiling.
- Didn't I tell you already, like, two times? - Raymond raised an eyebrow.
- Shush, I want to hear this story from him too, you know how much I'm curious about this! - Henry laughed and then looked at Kevin.
- O-okay. Well, while I was a journalist, I needed to ask him a few questions about work. That's when we first talked to each other. His answers got me in stitches, heh. Then...
While Kevin continued talking, Ray was looking at him, lost in thoughts. He didn't even realize that he was smiling. He couldn't believe his happiness - Kevin is right in front of him, safe and happy. He watched Cozner let his gaze away, shrugging his shoulders and just simply breathing, and every move of him was the most charming thing Ray could ever imagine. And it all belongs to him.
- Ahh, you guys are really cute together, never thought I would say "cute" about Raymond, - Henry shook his head.
- Ehh, thank you, I guess, - Kevin smiled a bit. Holt smiled softly too and squished his hand a little.
Henry smiled, and then some woman stepped to him.
- Oh my God, I was looking for everywhere, Jenny, where have you been? Kevin, this is my wife - Jennifer, Jenny, this is Raymond's boyfriend, Kevin, - he introduced them.
Kevin wasn't quick enough to say something, as Jennifer asked in shock:
- Wait, boyfriend?
- Uhh.. Jenny, you knew Raymond is gay... - Henry seemed a bit embarrassed about his wife's attitude. He looked at Ray and Kevin, like he was trying to mentally say sorry.
- Yes, but I thought he'd change his mind, really, - she said with interest.
Kevin and Ray looked at each other.
- It's not something you can change your mind about, - Holt said neatly.
- Nah, you just didn't understand that yet, guys, - Jennifer smiled.
- But don't worry, I can help you two find someone so that you can be normal again! - The women said enthusiastically.
- W-we don't need anyone else!.. We have each other and that's all that we need! - Kevin wasn't angry, he sounded more scared.
- Jenny, please, let's go and talk about this, ok? Let's go... - Henry pulled his wife away, whispering "I'm sorry" to Ray and Kevin.
Cozner hugged his shoulders, looking down.
- I knew it would happen... - He said quietly.
- Don't worry, Kevin, everything is fine, - Raymond patted his boyfriend's shoulder.
- Stay strong. If you can't do in by anyway, I promise we'll go home, alright? - Holt lifted Kevin's head, placing his hand on Cozner's chin.
- Okay. I'll try to. - Kevin sighed and straightened his back, looking in Raymond's eyes.
Though it wasn't that easy. As they started to speak with people, many of them just walked away, going like "ew" or something.
Only a few people they met didn't seem to be disgusted. At least something.
- Ohhhh, guys, I have an idea! Couples group photo?
- Henry, we do that all the time, - Jennifer shook her head.
- Well, we've got Raymond and Kevin now, Ray never was in there before! Come on, we did that every year, why not? - Henry smiled.
- Uhhh, no, thank you. Not this time, - some man who Kevin and Ray met earlier and who turned to be homophobic too, said.
- I'm out.
- I have to go...
That left only a few people. Even they did demand not to be near these two, they agreed only because Henry insisted.
- I told you we don't belong here, - Kevin said quietly.
- And I heard you, - Holt nodded.
Henry really tried to convince them to join, at first Kevin didn't want to, but then they just gave up, Henry was pretty active and said "please" too many times.
- Huh. That's our first photo together, - Raymond said, looking at the picture.
- Right... I completely forgot about that we didn't have any photos where we are together, - Kevin took Holt's hand.
- We do now.
- Shall we take it?
- Of course.
The rest of the night was quite good. Until...
Kevin relaxed a bit, nothing bad happened after the photo. He went to take him and Raymond something to drink, feeling confident now.
Someone grabbed his elbow and he gasped - it did hurt.
He turned to see who was that and felt that he was pressed to the wall pretty hard.
- Ow! What-
- Don't show your homo shit in public, you fag! You two are fucking psychos! If I see you again doing that shit, I swear, I'll-
Kevin didn't remember quite well what happened next. He remembered Raymond showing up, he was already having a nosebleed - these guys tried to beat him up too, but as Kevin saw Ray punching the guy, who was holding him, he understood that Raymond was able to fight with them.
He remembered screams, remembered Henry trying to calm them down, remembered how he was trying to pull Raymond away from the guy, while Holt was aggressively saying something and while Henry was holding the man.
He remembred already sitting in the car, sacred, holding Raymond's hand and wiping the blood off his face.
He remembered getting home, helping with Holt's wounds, telling that he shouldn't have putted quite a fight because of him and hearing Ray saying that he would die for him.
- Don't you dare, I'll get up there and kill you once more if you'll do that, you got me?! - Kevin said with a shaking voice.
- If you'll be able to fight me, I'm still stronger. - Raymond chuckled, sitting straight in front of Kevin.
- My anger is terrifying. - Mumbled Cozner.
- Aww, yes, sure, - Ray teased him, getting a very light push from Kevin. And still, Cozner was smiling.
- Did you get hurt? - Holt asked.
- You're asking that for the third time, Raymond. I'm alright, - Kevin said, hugging him.
- I just wanted to make sure, because you are rather stubborn and I know that sometimes you can lie just not to make me fell worried for you and your state.
- You always can detect if I'm lying, we've been through this.
- That's true too. Not looking at the fight, did you like the party?
- ...I think yes. I thought it would be much worse, but it was quite... fun. And we got out first picture together.
- Then I'll save it, if you like it so much.
- I'd be glad if you do this.
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argylemikewheeler · 7 years ago
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omg, can i just first off say how much i love your account and writing???? it’s awesome my dude! prompt idea: steve protecting will and mike from bullies after they come out, and the kids and steve just having a lot of moments of love and cuteness
minor homophobic language. but major big brother!Steve. also ily anon
Somehow, Steve Harrington started driving Mike to school. He picked up the entire party, actually– except Will since his mother still insisted she see him off to school everyday. Steve switched seamlessly from driving Nancy to school to her brother and his two friends. Mike didn’t mind the excuse to avoid the bike ride in the cold weather. It was also nice to have a high schooler drop Mike off at middle school– he needed every perk he could get before hitting high school himself. Steve didn’t mind being seen with them and picking them up from AV club. Steve was a pretty alright big brother, if Mike had to put him to it.
Wednesday morning, Mrs. Byers was earlier than usual and Will was leaning up against the bike rack as Steve pulled up. Mike waved from the backseat, Lucas and Dustin behind him.
“Alright, last stop, gents. Everyone out!” Steve said, clapping his hands on the steering wheel. “I’ve got a hot date with first period history I cannot be late to again.”
“Thanks, Steve.” Dustin said, clapping his shoulder before sliding out the driver’s side, Lucas and Mike getting out on the passenger side.
Mike made a direct line from the car to Will, smiling and holding a hand out to take his, if only for a moment before going through the front doors; Lucas was already trying to find Max in the mass of moving students. It was only fair. Unfortunately, before Mike’s hand could even reach Will’s, a body intercepted his vision of Will, strong arms pushing him back and shouting down at him.
“Get that shit out of my school, fairy!” The boy looked familiar but Mike hadn’t learned his name yet. He knew the minute he learned it, he’d have the subconscious need to report him. He didn’t want to get involved. “You disgust me.”
“Thank you.” Mike grumbled, rolling onto his knees and pushing himself to his feet. Will stood against the bike rack, afraid to move any closer.
“Are you okay?” He asked quietly, eyeing the people staring at him. The boy was still loitering, looking at Will with terrifying focus. Mike nodded, grinning at Will to try and avoid the tense frown trying to form as he felt blood spread through the knees of his new corduroys. Hopefully the mud would  block some of the stain.
“What did I say?” The boy came back again, shouldering Mike back as he stepped up to Will. “Get that fag shit away from here, Wheeler. You have no place here!”
“Hey hey hey, what did you just say to him?” Mike whipped around to see Steve climbing out of his illegally parked car. His sleeves were rolled and Mike could see his forearm flex as he curled and uncurled his fingers into a tight, firm fist. Dustin and Lucas were walking back towards Mike and Will, noting the mud on his pants and the fearful stare on Will’s face.
“Oh, is your Mommy here, Wheeler?” The boy said, spitting a laugh at Steve.
“I asked you a question, dicknose.” Steve said, stopping by Mike and placing a hand on his shoulder. “What did you just say to Mike?”
“I called him a fag. Do you know what that word means?” He teased Steve, folding his arms and staring up at Steve like he was an eclipse, the shadow casting over his face but his eyes squinted in anger. “It’s what you call freaks that deserve it enough to be dead.”
“Wrong answer.” Steve laughed, grabbing the kid by the front of his shirt and lifting him off the ground. “Now, I know that your brain is far too puny to jostle around in your head, but I’m only going to say this once, understood? You leave Mike and Will alone. By themselves. Unbothered by you. Understand?”
“Oh, and you think I’m scared of you?” The boy’s words faltered but he acted like they were barbed enough to slice through Steve’s grip. It only made it stronger. “You’re just a pussy.”
“And you are one remark away to being a name on a gravestone, do you understand me?” Steve said, shaking the boy in his grasp. “They aren’t hurting you. And frankly, hating gay people isn’t cool, asshat. You shouldn’t be scared of them because they are different or whatever the fuck you think they’ll do to you. You should be scared because gay people can kick your ass just as much as any straight person.”
“Oh yeah?” The kid laughed, his feet kicking out towards Steve lamely.
Steve pulled the kid to his nose, staring into his eyes like he was trying to pierce his eyes with invisible pins. “Yeah. I’d know.” He dropped the boy, his knees buckling and collapsing at Steve’s feet. He scrambled back, sputtering and trying to snap back at Steve. Mike grabbed Will by the shoulder and pulled him out of the way of the boy’s clambering run. Steve put an arm on Mike’s shoulder, his hand resting on Will’s back.
“Why’d you say that?” Will asked, peering up at Steve. Steve was watching the boy scamper away with a stiff expression, not holding the expected prideful smirk. “You aren’t gay… Are you Steve?”
“No. But, I mean, why does he need to know that?” Steve shrugged. “I just bought you guys guaranteed fear for the next four years. As far as he’s concerned, you guys are going to become me. And I mean, come on, you should be so lucky.”
“I don’t think that’s how it works.” Mike muttered, squinting at Steve. “I don’t think he thinks that.”
“Well,  then it looks like I have to start walking you to your first period.” Steve said, clapping them both on the back. “I can scare a few thirteen-year-olds. No problem. I’ll teach you how.”
“I want to know how to pick them up by their shirts!” Will said, laughing and leaning against Mike’s side. He flexed his arms jokingly, pretending the shirt was ripping around his arms.
“You’re gonna need the space girl for that, noodle-arms.” Steve said, winking at Will. “But maybe I can get Mike to do the heavy lifting for you. You can do all the insults.”
“Good cop, bad cop!” Will agreed, folding his arms and mulling the idea over. He nodded at Steve and he clicked his tongue at him, winking again.
“I just saw Kevin go in running. Is everything okay?” Dustin asked, partially laughing at the scared bully. He watched from a distance but hadn’t heard the exchange, hadn’t heard Steve’s tactic.
“Perfect.” Steve said, shrugging as if it was a simple question. “Just some people pushing my buddies around. We’re all good. You? Have anyone I need to push around?”
“No. No, we’re okay.” Lucas shook his head, looking to his friends for agreement.
“Yeah, us too. Thanks, Steve.” Mike said. He adjusted his bag on his back and reached down for Will’s hand. He reached back with a strong grip, neither of them scared with their friends slowly circling around them. Mike had never felt that happy at school before; maybe the rest of eighth grade wouldn’t be a horrible experience. He’d always have his friends– and Steve. “We better get going… Shouldn’t you too Steve?”
“Yeah, don’t you have a quiz or something?” Will spoke to Steve although he was staring at his and Mike’s hands.
“Nah. I’d rather be a part of changing history than just listening to some old guy teach it.” He said, still standing tall beside them. He scanned the entrance, his eyes dragging over to students that loitered for too long. “You guys are more important than any goddamn quiz.”
“Ew, you sound like our parents.” Lucas laughed, shaking his head with a scrunched up face.
“Fine. Let me rephrase.” Steve cleared his throat and placed his hands on his hips looking at each boy directly. “You dipshits don’t deserve this garbage. Better?”
“Better.” Mike nodded. He and Will began walking towards the school, turning back to speak to Steve one last time. “See you at three?”
“I’ll be here.” Steve promised. “I’m always going to be here.”
ao3
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dixonministry · 8 years ago
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Male Insecurity
As much as I can bitch about any gender and all the stupid things people do, my first truly gender biased rant here is going to be about men. Yes, my fellow XY Chromosome holders, you’re about to get shot down.
There is one thing about the majority of the male gender that really fucking pisses me off. Insecurity. Yes, men are fucking insecure about everything! I’m not going to bore you with some bullshit psychobabble about WHY men are insecure about shit. Nobody fucking cares why, they just are. Probably the single biggest issue for men is not being secure in their sexuality. Yes, I said “their��� not “our.” I don’t lump myself in with the rest of those losers; I’m a whole different breed of man. For example, just try asking a guy to do something “feminine” like holding his girlfriend’s purse for a minute. Most men will flip the fuck out and be all like “Nah, baby, I ain’t doin’ that shit. I’ll look like a fag or something.” And there’s what it all boils down to. Heterosexual (?) men are so fucking afraid to do anything that might make them appear “un-manly” or gay or some other stupid thing like that. Oh, Heaven forbid a little boy might be interested in doing something like becoming a ballet dancer or even a nurse. The poor little guy’s dad will snap and give him a 3 hour lecture on why that’s wrong and how “boys don’t do that stuff – that’s for girls.” Oh, fuck you, caveman. How about if a man is asked his opinion on what another guy looks like? That’s always funny as shit to see their brains twisting around trying as hard as they possibly can NOT to think of another guy “like that.” Oh, please! This, I think, comes from the stupid fantasy that all women are lesbians. Just bear with me for a second, I’m gonna explain that. See, guys don’t mind when a woman says that some other woman has a nice body. Guys don’t mind it because they think that deep down there’s some sexual connotation behind it. No there isn’t, you fuck. When a woman says “Damn, she’s got a nice ass!” she’s really saying “Damn, I wish MY ass looked like that!” If guys would get the fuck over thinking that there’s a sexual meaning behind every damn thing, they’d be able to do that too. For example, let me prove how secure I am. I think Jared Leto has a fuckin’ great body (and a kick-ass name too, lol). Now, I think that cuz I want MY body to look like that, not because I want to fuck him. Ignorant homophobic pricks… Damn, you guys get on my nerves! Ladies, you wanna hear some more male insecurities? Try telling your man that you want to spice things up in the bedroom. He could take this one of two ways. If he’s pretty slow on the uptake, he’ll just think “hell yeah” but if he’s got at least half a brain, the chances are that he’s going to think that he’s not performing well enough in bed and that you’re trying to tell him that he’s not a good lay. Let me explain this to you in psychobabble. See, men have the mindset of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” while most women have the mindset of “If it’s not broken, it can be made better.” So, when girls try to make something about their man “better,” he interprets it as “she thinks I’m broken and need to be fixed” (fixed as in “repaired”, not neutered…stop laughing, the pun was unintentional). If you think I’m full of shit…well, I’m just not. I got that one straight out of that “Men are From Mars…” book. Yes, guys, I have read it and NO that doesn’t make me gay…dumbass. *cough*makesmesmart*cough* Now that you understand this, ladies, I gotta say…you need to stop fixing things that don’t need fixing. Yup, I’m changing it up now and bitching about this for this paragraph. Now that you are AWARE of the miscommunication, fuckin’ stop it. Leave us the fuck alone and stop trying to make us “better” damn it. If we want to become better at anything, we’ll do it ourselves because that’s just how we operate. Listen, guys (yeah, back to the guys now), it is seriously time to get over this neanderthal bullshit. There’s lots of things that guys can do (and, in fact, secretly WANT to do) that they just won’t even try to do because it might make them appear less masculine. Get over it, asshole. Why the fuck do you care if some homophobic jock-strap thinks you’re gay? As long as you still like pussy, you’re not gay, you dweeb. And, quite frankly, only ignorant low-lifes would even CARE if you were. Like I said, I’m a different breed of man. If I had a girl and she asked me to hold her purse, I’d throw it over my shoulder and prance around like the biggest queen you’ve ever seen. Why? Because it’s funny, that’s why. Mostly, I’d do that to make fun of beef-heads who think they’re too fucking manly to carry a damn bag. Yeah, I’ll carry the purse all damn day long, prance around, talk with a lisp, and then STILL beat your stupid ass with a tire iron if you need some “proof” as to my manhood. If a gay guy makes a pass at me, I don’t freak out like “Ew, no, get away from me you fuckin’ fag.” I’ve been hit on by guys before (cuz I look good, damn it) and I always just politely tell them that I don’t swing that way. Does it make me less manly that I didn’t get all grossed out because some dude found me attractive? No! I’m still just as much a man… Actually, that makes me a much bigger man than all the homophobes out there because I’m man enough to use my fucking head for something other than knocking people down on a football field. IDIOTS. Look, I can’t help it that you don’t feel like a big enough man without being a fucking asshole to people. Yeah, I’m an asshole, but only to people who deserve it. I don’t have to be an asshole just to prove how big my balls are. I can prance around and curtsy like a little girl and STILL be twice the man you are, fucker.  How big of a man is Salt, really? Well, since most of you dickheads equate violence with masculinity, here’s my stats. I have NEVER lost a fight in my life – not once, ever. True, it’s because I’m a mean son of a bitch who doesn’t believe in fighting fair, but that’s not the point (ehehehehe). Mainly though, the number one reason I’ve never lost a fight is because I’m man enough to know when to fight. It wasn’t always that way but for the past decade it has been. See, I fight for a REASON, not just to prove what a big tough macho stud I am. If you come up to me on the street and shove me, trying to provoke a fight, I’m gonna tell you to get lost before I call the cops and press charges against you for putting your damn hands on me. If you come up to me and punch me, I AM going to have your stupid ass locked up. If you come up and hit my girl, my friend, my sister, anyone that I’m with and you have a penis…THAT is when you get to see what a big tough man I am, because that’s when I’m gonna hold the taser on you until you can’t move and THEN beat you until I think I’ve heard enough cracks come from your rib cage! Then, YOU get to press charges and I still won’t give a fuck. Are you seeing my point here? My point is that there are REASONS to be violent, but there are no reasons to be STUPID about it. That “bad” enough for ya? Shit, most of those pricks won’t even get it. I’m not wasting my time on you guys anymore. Fuck off.
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