#if I were actually her girlfriend
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the problem is that being single is seen as the consolidation prize, and not the natural neutral state of being-a-person. at the end of the movie or the book or the poetry, there is a person waiting for you at the altar, and they love you. if the play is a comedy, everyone gets married. the metaphor is about how you are not-whole. the metaphor is about how everyone is going to be happily-ever-after. the metaphor is that romantic love is the most important resource on the planet, not just all-love. all-love is not a thing, that is a disappointment. the treasure is not the friends we made along the way. the treasure is the girl you landed.
the metaphor is that you cannot be alone, that means you are broken. are you getting over someone? that is acceptable, you can be getting over someone, but not for long. you must be single because you would rather not be single. you must be single and looking to not-be-single. you must want to date, eventually.
friendship and community are never seen as being equal-to or even-better than romantic connection. that person is your one! you need to find them. you need to hunt through the sand particles until you can shift out some kind of gem. this is regardless to your own experience of the beach and the sun. you need to be somewhere with someone.
if you are taking this time alone to heal, that is so sad. everyone gives you this little pitying look. the understanding is that you are not actually happier than you were before you were single. it is seen as a sort of pity - oh, you are choosing yourself, making yourself the priority? - that isn't quite right. you must mean that you are making yourself ready for the right person. you are just laying the bed better this time. open up your heart. you'll find them, we promise!
what do you mean you're really-truly genuinely-very happy? you are probably misremembering what it was like to be in a relationship. and besides, once you meet your person, that time will look grey and bland and wasted. your person is the only way for you to see in color. so what if you have taken this time - for the first time in your entire life - to actually-for-real do the fucking work. you can be proud of yourself, sure. but the way we need to know that you got better is that you get a partner. you're healed enough for the next bad part!
people don't choose to be single, they just say they're choosing to be single - they actually mean "nobody wants to date me." it doesn't matter how many people you have gently rejected or how many times you've talked it over carefully in therapy. what matters is that you are single, and by all accounts - that means you are something worth our pity. your successes and life all seem pale in the sunlight. sure, you have done amazing things and finally found your way in life. what matters is that there wasn't a person in the room with you while you did it.
you want to tell them - that's the whole thing. i didn't know how to be alone in the room. i didn't know how to handle the silence. every moment was so sharp, and i kept choosing the wrong way to close the door. i have spent my entire life in the empty well, living in the ricochet of someone else's cruelty. for once i have built myself a ladder. for once everything i taste is all mine, every bite of sunshine and laughter. i have learned how to sleep out in the open with my memories. recently, they have started to purr.
your father rolls his eyes. listen. this isn't about you. i just want a grandchild in my future.
#writeblr#i actually didn't want a girlfriend before nat#and my dad recently said to me - raquel. i don't approve of the promiscuity#1. i am 30.#2. i had casually dated about 4 people over 18 months.#3. i do believe he was just mad that i get more girls than he ever did#i had to look this 60 yr old deacon in the eye and say. okay so i have a girlfriend first of all im just not tellin yall about her#and secondly.#OKAY???? OLD MAN I DONT EVEN LIVE HERE WHAT ARE U GONNA DO ABOUT IT#briefly considered asking nat if i could pretend we were a one night stand kind of a thing
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Themed Slay the Princess Playthrough Ideas
Someone Explodes: Razor -> Fury -> Wild (via Witch) -> Cage -> Happily Ever After
Big Princess: Wraith -> Razor -> Apotheosis -> Eye of the Needle -> Den
Narrator has a Very Bad Time: Princess & Dragon -> Apotheosis -> Moment of Clarity -> Wild -> Thorn
Hard to Draw: Beast -> Moment of Clarity -> Razor -> Cage -> Fury
I would Trust them to Watch my Drink at a Party: Spectre -> Prisoner -> Adversary -> Wraith -> Thorn
Opportunist is There: Razor -> Wraith -> Moment of Clarity -> Witch -> Happily Ever After
I'm out of ideas suggest YOURS in the comments thanks
#slay the princess#cut is the 'ghost girlfriends' playthroughs bc there weren't enough ghost girls to fill all 5 routes#stp#for the record i did try to arrange all of these based on 'narrative satisfaction of your playthrough'#(except for hard to draw. that's ranked by how hard i think they are to draw)#(beast is lowest bc her greatest challenge is a lack of reference material#M.O.C I haven't actually drawn her new look but I do NOT like the look of all them hands#razor you can just draw her base form or heart if you want to be lazy (i do)#Cage & Fury I have tried to draw several times and each time i get stuck on drawing chains and organs and have no choice but to weep)#im a little woozy so im very sorry this post probably makes no sense#(also Damsel Stranger and HEA were considered but excluded from the drink ranking#Damsel strikes me as someone who will happily take your drink but not actually watch it#heart stranger would probably be a good choice but stranger in their original form i think is a bit too disoriented#and i just don't wanna ask HEA. she's got enough going on rn)
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bitches be wishing they were usopp to pull zosan like that
#actually i wish i were zosan#usopp my boyfriend (real)#dude has game look at his two boyfriends#and also her girlfriend kaya never forget <3#these are actual pics i just took rn bc i saw two illustrations next to each other in a comic book shop ??? gay#sanuso#zosopp#roronoa zoro#sanji#usopp#one piece
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In all honesty I can imagine Karen writing up a contract in her spare time at work and making Brent sign it so that he's "legally only allowed to inspire her in sessions". Brent signs it without hesitation because why not! Legally binding himself to inspire Karen is fair and within her rights!
#my characters#oops i fell in love#i love karen so much you guys and she deserves all the inspiration#also i think right is probably completely ignoring this entire debate for the sake of talking to angel who came into the room#to say good night to her dad AND her future wife#so angel and right are just exchanging good nights over and over off screen#also i just realized how many jokes right would make if they were actually playing this in chris' home#much to the poor guy's annoyance he would probably get slammed with so many comments about#IN THIS CHRISTIAN HOUSEHOLD? cause his full first name is in fact christian#which (points at his daughter) explains some things about naming her angel#also the idea that paul and brent and karen would never get to see chris' house aside from dnd is nice#bc right does actually go over to watch angel some weekend nights so that chris can go out#to have a romantic night with his boyfriend and girlfriend
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lesbian masterdoc and the unforgivable damage of making people hear compulsory heterosexuality and think of "can lesbians have crushes on men?" (no) instead of "are heterosexual women settling in unhappy marriages with men bellow their worth because of economic and social pressure?" (yes)
#not claiming the theory was without flaws but it sure didn't describe some virus mental affliction that exclusively plagues lesbians#for starters the theory was primarily about marriage. so it did recognise the historical fact of lesbians forced into marriage to avoid#honor killings and the still present possibility and threats especially when it comes to cults and strong religions#(once again mentioning as a Jeová's witness in a brazilian periphery my girlfriend accepted the tool of losing her entire family and social#circles to reject an arranged marriage at the age of 17. and she's bisexual. but THAT is what compulsory heterosexuality alludes to)#but more often than not when it addressed lesbians it was as the inherent threat they pose to heteropatriarchy#that they mere existence proved women were not all born to serve men. and that their lives often proved women are much happier and#accomplished when away from the burden of men.#and this acknowledging just how much loneliness was a reality through lesbian's experiences#at the same time I can understand the frustration of that feminist theory being reduced to 'comphet is when lesbians in high school were#pressured into picking one of the Backstreet Boys to lie about finding attractive'. and even more so when that non universal and much less#serious example somehow morphed into 'comphet is when bisexual women either lying or confused about being lesbians have sex with men and#find it unfulfilling' because accepting that narrative erases and harms lesbians#so I understand the 'comphet isn't real' posts especially because written like that it tends to refer to lesbian masterdoc and following#fiasco. but at the same time that wasn't the original intent of compulsory heterosexuality the actual feminist term#this is just me complaining about how social media butchers theory tho unless they are specifically naming Rich and the many other feminist#who wrote about heterosexual marriage as an institution I won't bother lesbians for venting frustration about neoliberal erasure of lesbian#the original theory sure didn't claim lesbians were immune to all this misogynistic violence but the term was never exclusively about them#and tended to ask more of 'where do we stand as women and feminists as a group much more interested in destroying heterosexual marriage than#simply making it more bearable?'#this got a little messy and senseless I'm tired#.txt
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So I went to the wiki page for the henghill Bullet & Brain mission of 2.2 looking for some dialogue I had missed and
a) I found something incredibly tasty that slotted into some other thoughts I'd been having, more on that on another day, and
b) I saw this super fun little trivia at the bottom, which!
I knew Penacony characters like Boothill took a lot of inspirations from old movies, but I didn't realize it was even in his and Dan Heng's relationship, that's so cool!!
It fits them very well, it's such a fun reference. "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" was an old buddy Western film (from 1969- nice) about a pair of outlaws. Butch Cassidy was the leader of a gang, and described as clever, affable, and talkative. Meanwhile, his closest companion, the Sundance Kid, was known as a man of few words.
Cassidy's original birth name was much more plain, but similar to Boothill, he took on a new moniker when he became an outlaw. "Cassidy" had been the last name of his beloved mentor, who taught him how to shoot and ride. And Sundance Kid was known as he was because Sundance was the name of his hometown, and it was the only place that had ever managed to catch and jail him, back when he'd been younger (also similar to Dan Heng, but ouch).
These two stick together like glue throughout the length of the film- through Cassidy's leadership of the gang being challenged, through a train robbery gone wrong, through being pursued by mercenaries, and even through fleeing to Bolivia and trying to start over together.
I don't want to say too much more, since the mission title is referencing one specific movie that I've never seen. I kinda wanna watch it now, though, just to see the inspiration that went into Boothill and Dan Heng and how they get along. I just think it's really sweet that these two were literally made to be the best of bros, how lovely is that. 💕
#honkai star rail#this can be ship or plantonic tbh yall are always free to tag my ramblings as you please haha#just! they're so sweet!!#FWENDS#i would love to see more of them being a dynamic duo further down the line ♡#i think the film moved things along a little quicker but the real life Cassidy and Sundance were actually in south america for a few years#they fled there to get away from pursuers along with Sundance's girlfriend Etta Place.#supposedly they managed to buy a small ranch and the three of them lived peacefully (and even lawfully!) together for like three years-#-until the law caught up with them again#at some point Etta Place returned to the US reportedly due to illness rather than not wanting to get caught like in the film#Sundance may or may not have escorted her back. but whether he did or not he returned to South America with Cassidy#the two of them eventually got into a huge firefight with authorities where Sundance was fatally shot and Cassidy chose to end his own life#that's the most common story anyway. some also say Cassidy snuck back into the US again where he lived quietly until his death.#but it reads kind of like rumors of Elvis Presley sightings to me BSMZKNSKS#the film ended much more happily with the two of them getting into shenanigans and a freeze frame of them in a hail of bullets haha#i wanna see Dan Heng and Boothill fight together too it would be so cool aaaaaa#they would be great at getting into shenanigans! as we've already seen!!#fun bonus info: Boothill's ult literally puts black bars at the top and bottom of the screen to look like a widescreen Western movie#fun bonus info 2: Cassidy was regarded with respect by some people bc he never stole from the poor he only robbed big companies#this is actually nicer than Boothill is in canon bc he openly admits he will rob someone blind if he doesn't like them BSKZKKZMSKDK#(although I feel like its implied he has more standards for this than he gives himself credit for.#like he makes it pretty clear he doesn't particularly like Argenti at first and thinks he's annoying as shit but I'm sure he didn't rob him#...would have been real fucking funny if he did though oh my god I would love to see him try that. it absolutely would not work BSKZKNSKSJS#hsr#henghill#bootheng#dan heng#boothill#hsr boothill#hsr dan heng
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been reading this comic series Giant Days since I thought it looked cute when I saw it at a library book sale a while ago. have now finished the 3 volumes I picked up there so I'm reading the rest online, which will make it easier to blog about if I feel so inclined
really digging the look of Daisy in a suit from the movie making chapter
#I hope she actually gets a girlfriend soon#they confirmed she was gay in book 1 and then they were like lets give everyone except her a romance plot#Giant Days#mangablogging#<- ?
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i completely understand the bisexual headcanons but there is something so 👌👏👍🤌 about gay and lesbian steve and nancy. like...the comphet is brain deadening.
#nancy in particular#like she dates steve because thats what she is supposed to want and she gets so much positive reinforcement#but she thinks she actually wants jonathan#because he's sensitive and maybe a bit feminine and not what is expected of her at all#and maybe thats better#maybe she just needs a different type of man#but#it still isn't right#it still isnt enough#she wants....she wants...fuck she WANTS#and steve just flirts with every conventually attractive girl#if he can just have the perfect girlfriend and be the perfect boyfriend it will all be ok#he seems baffled by the idea that he is supposed to date someone he really truly likes#of course its all about image what else is there?#i just think its neat#i almost never see bi eddie and gay steve i think that would be fun#stranger things#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#steddie#also like i love steve and i dont think nancy handed it well (understandable) but#their relationship WAS bullshit#i think steve really thought they were in love but i also don't think he really understood what that is#or what it could be (like this is canon to me)#i think nancy knew on some level they were both pretending maybe she didnt realize steve didnt know this#and so like sure maybe men are hot sometimes like whatever it doesn't mean anything tho#he wants a wife and kids so it doesn't matter#and then he gets with (eddie) and is just like ???? what are these feelings?? how is he so hot??? sex is so good now????#is this how its supposed to feel??
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Red and Green
Gil is glowering. He's been glowering almost since they arrived. He's happy to help, of course. Jack is in the winter play, and since Sersi is also teaching at his school, they've all come to help out with last minute decorating and such. He's baked five sheet pans worth of goodies for the bake sale taking place before and after the play.
Thena is on stage, helping Jack and a few other kids with putting fake snow everywhere. She's not exactly taking part but she's good at keeping them from throwing it on each other or anywhere unnecessary.
That's not the problem. The teacher talking to her is the problem.
Gil doesn't know who he is. Ben says he thinks he's the gym teacher or something. Seems a little young--aren't gym teachers always old dudes who don't actually play sports? This guy is their age, visibly handsome, even from a distance.
"You're a natural with them," the tall, blonde stranger insists.
Thena shakes her head, "I couldn't disagree more. I am here for Jack and no one else. The little hellions can fend for themselves."
She says, and then still decisively stops two boys close to the stairs from seeing what the fake snow tastes like.
"Well, I think you're a natural." Who does this guy think he is? He was moving some larger stuff around with Ikaris all afternoon. Apparently until Thena caught his eye and lured him away.
Gil rolls his eyes as Mister Blondie pulls off the fleece he's been wearing. His t-shirt gets pulled up a little with it, just enough for the stage lighting to really emphasize the full, washboard eight pack of abs he's got.
Phastos clears his throat loudly in Ben's ear. "Ahe-hem, Mister Stoss."
"Habibi, please," Ben attempts to lean away from his husband. "It is not a sin to have eyes, my love."
Gil sneers to himself. Thena has eyes. And while she wasn't openly admiring like Ben had - no matter how briefly - he knows she's seen them. He just...knows it.
"Gil?" Ikaris walks over to him, tugging at his own t-shirt now that boxes are moved or sets are arranged, or whatever they've been doing. "Wanna give us a hand?"
"Who is that guy?" Gil points blatantly at the man still chatting Thena up while she's trying to keep an eye on Jack and his friends.
Ikaris looks and shrugs. "Teacher."
Gil shakes his head at him. If Ikaris weren't both Thena's brother and Sersi's husband, sometimes he really wonders how they would have become friends. "Thanks, helpful--I meant how did he and Thena get to talking. She doesn't usually talk...with people."
It's not his most subtle tactic. But Ikaris doesn't seem to pick up on his greenish aura. "I heard him ask her a little about what she used to play. Guess they're talkin' about college sports?"
Gil's discomfort only increases, though. Thena did play sports when they were younger. He didn't. And he knows that she misses how she used to play soccer in high school and even in the first year of college.
His eyes are glued to them as Thena smiles and even laughs faintly as she talks to Whats-His-Face.
"What?" Ikaris asks him outright (no tact at all).
Gil huffs, deciding he's done just watching things unfold. "I don't think you'd like it if he was chatting up your wife."
Ikaris makes a face. "I guess not. But he's not. And Thena's not your wife."
Gil doesn't have a defense to that. He storms off so Ikaris can't announce to all the auditorium volunteers how flushed he is. Instead, he hurries up the little stairs onto the stage. "Uh, hey."
Thena stops dead in her conversation to smile at him, "hey."
He has to give it to him, if Mister Golden is bothered at all by the interruption, he doesn't let it show. "Hey, thanks again for helping out. The school doesn't have much to offer for things like these. Volunteering really goes a long way for the kids."
Gil tries not to scoff at Mister Perfect's magnanimous speech. He offers a stiff smile and hovers closer to Thena. "Yeah--I need Thena's help with the bake sale stuff, if you'll excuse us."
Thena lets him grasp her hand and all but pull her away. She only lingers enough to point over her shoulder, "Jack is in charge."
The other kids whine, but he's still riding the high of having all his 'cool' aunts and uncles help.
"Oh," Mister Friendly laughs faintly with a bright smile (and perfect teeth). "Well, it's already snowing out. You should stay warm inside."
Gil bristles as Mister Flirtatious' hand comes dangerously close to touching Thena's shoulder. He pulls her closer to him.
"I can give you a hand," he offers.
Gil is now borderline tugging Thena with him. "Thanks, but I need to, uh, ask her opinion on some things."
He wants to get right in the guy's face and tell him that of course he knows it's already snowing. He's not going to let Thena get cold! He rushes off the stage with her and makes sure to grab her coat off the back of one of the chairs. Maybe it's a bit obvious, but he loudly shakes it out and holds it up for her to slide her arms into the sleeves.
Mister Sunshine just smiles and waves before going back to watching the kids.
Gil sniffs. "He's friendly."
"Quite." It doesn't tell him what he wants it to. Usually Thena isn't warm to people just coming up and talking to her.
"What were you guys talking about?" he asks, realizing it's too late for him to be asking in a fake-casual way. He shoves his hands in his pockets as they walk out of the auditorium and head outside.
"He introduced himself as the physical education teacher," she states factually, which at least isn't the smitten fondness he was dreading hearing from her after their interaction. "He told me Jack is doing exceedingly well in his activities."
Of course that was his in; Thena is a sucker for talking about Jack, in any way, shape or form.
"Phastos is insistent Jack learn American football, but my practices with him have been paying off," she states with her nose all the way in the air with pride.
Gil laughs. Thena is determined to get Jack so hooked on it that he calls it football instead of the American 'soccer'. "It is a little less physical than football."
They get outside and Gil shoves his hands deeper in his pockets. Maybe it was dumb for him to get Thena's coat for her and not go looking for his own.
"Gil, aren't you cold?" she asks outright.
"It's okay, I just need a hand with a few of the trays," he excuses with a smile, unlocking his car from where they stand.
"What did you need my opinion on?"
Oh, right, the blatant and bold faced lie he told in order to soothe his own jealousy. What was he thinking? Ikaris was right, Thena isn't his wife--she's not even his girlfriend. But that never really bothered him so much as when he saw Mister Model up there chatting her up...showing off his abs to her.
"Gil?"
"Uh, well," he hesitates to get out as they step out from the school doors' cover and into the light evening snow. "I guess...do you think what I made will sell well?"
It's lame--it's super lame, and embarrassing. It's a bit late, isn't it? He's made a full dozen of five different desserts. Wouldn't he have asked this before he got so far into the process? And she and Jack were there when he baked them at Ben and Phastos'!
"Of course they will," she answers honestly, though. He likes the blunt and earnest realism on her more than Ikaris. "Your baking is always amazing. I'm sure the school will make back the cost of the play and then some."
"If they make the 'then some' I think I should get to keep the profit," he mutters. Thena laughs at his joke, but butter is expensive, and he's made three dozen different shortbreads! "Here."
He hands Thena a tray of the frosted cookies, which have to be separate from the rest to keep their design integrity pristine. He carries the other three trays himself and closes his trunk.
"It's nice that Jack is excited about it."
Gil smiles, some of his earlier agitation melting away. Thena, for all her insistence that she didn't like anything to do with children, lives for Jack. She loves coming to his school events, helping with parent stuff. He knows she's lied at her job so she can attend every single soccer game he has, even when they're at 4 in the afternoon on a tuesday.
"I didn't expect him to be so happy to have all of us here."
"Well sure," Gil chuckles, breathing a little easier now that it's just them. "Jack thinks you're the coolest aunt in the world. He's bragging to his friends right now about how you were a pro soccer player and know how to use swords."
Thena rolls her eyes modestly. "I keep telling him it's an amateur fencing class."
Calling it amateur is a disservice; Gil has witnessed a little of it giving her a ride once, and she dominates in it.
"I hope he never gets tired of having us around for things like this," she admits to him quietly, maybe even sheepishly. "Even when he's a teenager."
Gil smiles even wider, because Thena is just so sweet and loving under her calm and placid exterior. "I'm sure he won't. At least not you--maybe Uncle Ikaris."
Thena laughs, and it shows off her teeth in a cute way.
Gil shifts his load to open the door for her. He really didn't need help with anything, but he doesn't need to confront what it means that he was so desperate to get her out here with him just yet.
"There you two are, people are starting to arrive!"
"Sorry, just had to keep 'em nice and cold y'know," Gil murmurs as Sersi rushes forward to take Thena's tray for her. He sighs but Ikaris has some decency and extends his hands. Gil lets him take the top tray from him. "Are you sure I'm supposed to have this much real estate?"
Sersi waves a hand. "I've run this bake sale the last three years. I am not exaggerating when I tell you two parents at most will actually bring enough. Everyone else just brings a store bought cookie platter and lets it suffice. They don't sell well and they just take it home with them after the play."
"Gil will put them all to shame."
He blushes at the confidence Thena has in him. "If it's to help the kids put this play on again next year, then fine."
Ben has his phone out, snapping pictures. "They're gonna knock people's socks off, Gil."
"Thanks guys," he sighs as he unwraps his trays upon trays.
"They certainly look great!"
Gil's blood pressure spikes again. He turns and someone has let the golden retriever with a whistle around his neck out of the auditorium. "Thanks."
"Jack's been bragging about how his uncle is the best cook on the planet. I hope I can snag one for myself before the play!"
He's just being friendly, but Gil can feel his veins tightening under his skin with every word out of this guy's mouth. He looks at Ben, who's all excited and bouncing with his phone up. "What?"
Ben points.
Gil looks up, as does Thena. There's a pretty half-assed sprig of mistletoe hanging from the decorative archway put up over the table. He looks around; none of the other ones have this. He's ready to tell Ben to stop messing around. But then the presence of Mister Smiley and the memory of him flirting with Thena resurfaces in Gil's mind.
Thena's eyes go wide but she doesn't move as he pulls her closer. He slides his hand up her cheek, letting his palm angle and hide where their faces make contact, and not too briefly. Her eyes flutter closed.
Everyone's jaws drop (except Ben's).
Gil pulls away. He's kissed her close enough to her mouth that it will look the part, but not actually on her lips. But far away from her cheek that it can't be misconstrued from her view. He smiles as her eyes open again and she blinks at him.
He's never seen Thena blush before.
"You know I wouldn't kiss you without asking," he whispers before pulling himself away from her. "But, uh, come find me after the play is done?"
"H-Hm," she squeaks out, taking a few stiff steps away, her heels clicking like a fawn's hooves as it learns to walk.
Gil goes back to setting up his bake sale spread, some renewed vigour swirling in his chest. He peeks up from the table. Mister Perky seems to have gotten the hint and has started directing parents with trays to take the other (smaller) tables. Gil is satisfied.
Ben loudly snaps a picture, practically giggling. "Habibti, you're as red as the tinsel."
"Stop it! And delete that!"
Gil chuckles to himself as Thena rushes back into the auditorium and away from the commotion he's just caused. He does hope she comes find him after, and not just because he's her ride home.
Ikaris gives him a strange look but Sersi rushes him inside too. She leans back into Gil's view to give him an enthusiastic thumbs up. He blushes, but if Sersi thinks it was the right move then maybe he's onto something.
Gil takes a seat, ready to start selling. He has to admit that maybe he owes it to Mister Chatty to save him a brownie or something. But only if he gets to kiss Thena again later.
#Thenamesh AU#happy winter everyone!!!#I hope you're all taking some time to relax and be kind to yourselves#for those still reading thank you for all your continued to support#it still makes me happy to write Thenamesh so...I'm gonna keep doing it#Gil gets positively foaming at the mouth jealous#watching this tall blonde and handsome stranger chat up HIS Thena#Ikaris is thick as a brick being like I don't get it she's not his girlfriend#Sersi: how did we ever get married?#Ben noticed right away that Mister Golden Retriever was interested in Thena#and also noticed that the second he was close enough to speak with her Gil forgot what he was doing immediately#we see protective Gil plenty#but this is well and truly jealous#Thean thinks nothing of it#also she doesn't care about abs#she's more about arms iykyk#Gil sells out before the play even starts everything looks so good#he sneaks into the theatre just in time for the play to start#he tries to get a peek at Thena but she's at the other end of all their friends and it's dark#really she's just feeling shy#but she does sneak out the second the play is done to come and find him#she asks him how things sold#because she's nervous#he gets right to business and asks if he can kiss her for real this time#without all their friends watching and taking pitcures#not that he doesn't ask Ben to send him the pictures from before anyway#they kiss for so long that eventually their friends come find them again anyway#Jack is confused what the big deal is because he has always thought Uncle Gil and Aunt Thena were married#Ben: actually they're not sweetie#Jack: they're kissing obviously they are
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baffling decision for season 2, episode 18 to end with lewis making a legit effort for charlotte, making a picnic of things she likes and hugging her and seeming really happy with her
only for episode 19 to trample all over that with him blowing her off after she mentions that she misses him and hasn't seen him for a while, then apparently forgetting he even has a girlfriend altogether and softly flirting with his ex while the narrative agrees that this is correct because, unlike charlotte, cleo always smiles when she first sees lewis. you know. unlike charlotte. who goes out of her way to try and make lewis happy and smiles literally every time she sees him. there's not even an episode between these!
#@opalsiren bestie this one's for you#like seriously. she even says that she's happy he wants to plan the date because that means he's happy and he verbally says he is#but then the next time we see her she says that she hasn't seen him in a while and he completely blows her off. like. what?#again! i don't even ship them!#i am one hundred percent a clewis shipper and i am very happy they got back together!#my problem is that the narrative has to twist and bend on the back of a character whose only role in this story is to get punched around#and humiliated so that other characters can grow#and lewis isn't even a little conflicted! it's like he knows that charlotte's role in life is just to be a contrived roadblock in his story#to getting back with cleo and therefore can pick and choose when she's an actual person he cares about and when she can just be tossed asid#why even have her in that episode if she didn't add anything but as a reminder that yes don't worry#lewis doesn't care about her when it's inconvenient and in fact here's a shot of her being abandoned and sad bc of it!#seemingly just as another kick in the stomach#you could literally take her out of the episode and lose nothing. bc it's about lewis meeting max and learning about the 50s mermaids as#well as getting closer to cleo. which is fine! they're going to get back together anyway! but why oh why#did we need to humiliate someone whose only crime at this point is being upset that her boyfriend is ignoring and blowing her off??#like. the one who can't stop smiling when she first sees you??? that's charlotte! her whole character is about lewis! and she's his actual#girlfriend at this point and they. last time we saw them together. were doing fine! he MADE HER A PICNIC LIKE SHE DID FOR HIM#gahhhhhh#h2o just add water#charlotte watsford#lewis mccartney#cleo sertori
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hey I hope you’re doing ok!! For the ask game, 🌈? Also perhaps ☔️?💧, even?
Hello hello, thank you for participating ☆ Once again, I can't comment on whether or not this extract is particularly fluffy but I do think it's rather sweet and it's definitely romantic so I think it's good for filling out both 🌈 and 💧!! It's an extract from what I've tentatively dubbed my 'Women and Apollo' doc which is essentially just a big running document I have dedicated to exploring themes and dynamics between Apollo and the women he's been entangled with! This extract in particular is from my Melia section 🥰
The night is a cold sheet spread across her shoulders. She wakes in pieces; first, her flesh, bracketed between the raw heat of Phoebus' bare chest and the sharp sting of the night air's fangs, then her mind, pleasure's fleeting haze quickly swept aside by panic then worry then guilt. What would Kaanthos say if he could see her now, bare breasted and stained in a male-god's desire? What would Father? No doubt she would have to cede the seat of the temple to Kaanthos. How could a carnal woman serve the people after all? And her river - oh, her sweet river! Would his waters even deign to soothe her scales when she was so completely drenched in the scent of a sky-god?
How foolish she's been, throwing everything away just because of some sweet words and a pretty face. Maybe Kaanthos truly did deserve the temple after all. Maybe Melia didn't deserve such a treasure if she was so easily seduced.
She sniffles softly, slipping gently from Phoebus' loose grip. His heat wafts off his skin like the warmth of a well-tended hearth, it lingers in her bones as she kneels in the grass of this unfamiliar field. It makes the sear of shame dig that much deeper into her heart. Phoebus had listened well to her warnings. He'd carried her someplace far away from flowing water, somewhere distant where her brother's scrying eyes could not reach. The tears welling in her eyes finally fall as she turns this way and that, utterly and completely lost without a source of water to follow. How could she return now? Even she was not bold enough to have the man she planned to reject take her back to her father's house.
Stupid girl. Foolish. How could she have been so short sighted?
"Melia?"
His voice is laden with sleep's husk, his arm makes little grabs at the grass searching for her shape. She swallows her tears and bids her voice to not betray her, "Here I am, my lord. You may go back to sleep."
The mildest furrow of his brow. When he turns his head, his hair flows like rich golden oil over the dark grass, "Come here," his hand keeps searching for hers, patting the ground, dragging long fingers over the dirt and frowning when he does not find her. "It is not yet morning, why have you fled so far from my side?"
Melia cannot help but laugh at his visage, clumsy and squinty-eyed, less the graceful gentleman who promised her a taste of change and more a bumbling kitten desperate for its mother's teat. She wipes her tears as quickly as she can muster, "If you but open your eyes, I'm certain you would find me."
He makes a grumbling noise, some cross between a boar's grunt and the crow's deep bellow, "Is this another of your games? I'm much too tired for games Melia." Finally, his finger grazes the edge of her ankle and like a child, he lights up, eyes still stubbornly closed but smile positively radiant, "Ah, there you are!" Diligently, he traces the shape of her leg with his open palm, measuring the smoothness of her calf, the swell of her knee, the broadness of her thigh, then he lays his head upon her, cheek pressed close to her stomach, heated back like warm coals against her skin. "So cool," he murmurs and kisses her stomach, throws his arm around her waist and nuzzles further into her skin, "Tell me when you've need of the water -" a dreadfully wide yawn interrupts him. "- I'll fetch it for you."
Melia finds herself laughing again, just a tiny thing as she runs her fingers through the thick waves of his hair. What is she to do now?
As for a fic idea I'd like to talk about since I don't know if I'll ever write it: Among the many, many, many things I'd like to write but probably never will, I really wish I could just sit down and write a story about Tenes and Hemithea. There's a lot of reasons why I have no plans to ever properly tackle anything regarding the Iliad - chief of which being that there's just too much information and the amount of research would be insane - but a lot of what I would potentially focus on have to deal with people and places Apollo loves and his inability to protect those things throughout the conflict starting with Tenes. I absolutely adore exploring Apollo's paternity in my writing and considering how fiersome Tenes was and how both he and Troilus would die protecting their sisters, I've just always wanted to dig into an exploration of their lives and connection with their father and how Tenes' death specifically would've affected Apollo. Like yeah, I know Troilus is usually the point of focus for such works especially because of the manner in which he was killed, but Tenes was also beloved! Also considering he was originally punished for being falsely accused of sexually assaulting his stepmother, I can't help but want to write his wrath when he realises what it is Achilles intends to do to Hemithea. Alas though, I don't think I'l ever get to do more than think longingly about it, at least right now lmao.
#ginger answers asks#ginger writes#thank you so much for the ask!#fun fact about priestesses - most of them weren't actually expected to be celibate and were often married but#specifically oracles of Apollo in early times were expected to be virginal as they were supposed to be dedicated to Apollo#since Melia was definitely an oracle based on what I've read about the Ismenian temple I ended up working a lot of purity anxiety into#her interpersonal conflict#by the by oracles of Apollo stopped being required to be virginal at some point since that role ended up being taken up by older women#Melia's whole Thing is a lot of fun tbh both from the perspective of like#a goddess who clearly had a lot of power in her own right considering how magnified her temple and worship was but who was still very much#looked after by her brother and father. I don't personally think Kaanthos was overprotective of Melia but I do think he took his job#of being her bodyguard very seriously#and considering most accounts of their affair say that Apollo just kinda yoinked Melia without telling her brother and father I don't blame#Kaanthos for resorting to extreme measures to get his sister back#Anyway it's another suuuper underrated relationship of Apollo's that I'm kinda obsessed with negl it's up there with Psamathe#which like my god why does no one ever talk about Apollo and Psamathe#I DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO WRITE ALL OF THESE AMAZING STORIES Y'ALL PLEASE#PLEASE#Marsyas this and Achilles that#When are we gonna talk about the time Apollo sent a revenge demon to torment an entire town for the negligent death of his son#and murder of his girlfriend?#smh smh#apollo#melia#greek myth writing
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just here to point out the “waiting to exhale” exhale ava exhaled while janine held her hands.
she was struggling to figure out what quick retort she was supposed to make (her normal) but her little heart was debating and the “shut up, janine” was the fastest, ava-signature thing she could say without having her true, actual, happy feelings be verbalized (love it). ava wanted to tell janine “thank you” or probably drop a tear but not yet. that day will come.
matter of fact, listen to janine too. the joy in her voice when she said “work family” while looking at ava and then the praying hands after…she was so emotionally happy and touched that all the bonding and togetherness she’s been pushing at school is actually received by ava. she’s making a positive, emotional impact on her (janine, the soft ava activator). even her getting on her tippy toes to express how elated she is and then the fond praying hands to follow.
[ava knows janine so well to the point that she knew she’d try to fix her relationship and janine knows ava so well that during this family-festive time, being w/ her chosen work family would be good for her. it’s so much love between them]
and since ava has officially become a part of janine’s work family, they are work girlfriends now (eventually becoming work wives) move over gregory
#abbott elementary#janine teagues#ava coleman#avanine#she loved the moment#y’all heard the shakiness in her voice#as she was revealing why she came over#and asking if she could stay#amazing how janine knew exactly why and what she needed#she was nervous to expose herself and was more nervous because she thought she would be rejected#and janine giving her nothing but love and kindness actually threw her off#they are unofficial girlfriends#sooo endearing#tone in voices are so important#i can’t believe the captions spelled janine wrong#anytime ava tells janine to shut up#she’s really saying i heart you#ava’s already told janine thank u in s1#that hug is coming#wait were they all in janine’s bedroom having that convo?
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The book has canon poly, so it hurts even more bc polyamory as a concept actively exists in the universe (polyamory always exists, but you know what I mean)
AND IT WOULD HAVE SAVED THEM!!!!! IT WASNT STIGMATIZED SO THE SOLUTION IS RIGHT THERE
#i didn’t know the book had canon poly!#but akskdkdksjskskdjdn the fact that if all three of them just sat down and got their heads out of their asses and TALKED TOGETHER#Elphaba was only recently Glinda’s friend so worried her crush might ruin that#Glinda was so lost in her own fantasies of being the girlfriend of the handsomest guy and true friends with someone#Fiyero never actually did anything he truly wanted until recently#ough#like yeah i know he only dated Glinda because she was fhe It Girl and he was the It Boy (🎶can i make it anymore obvious🎶)#literally dancing through life. no thoughts. just going through the motions until he is forced to stop and think#and Glinda is so caught up in being beloved by all. the savior and Good Witch while also being doted and spoiled#who she is now….would she even be capable of sharing her boyfriend?#even with her best friend whom she’s grown to love despite her initial prejudices while continuing to cling to shallow affection by all?#man 🫠#Dr Dillamond if only you were still teaching *sigh*#wicked#wicked 2024#asks
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*looks at you with big wet eyes* transfem sirius hcs please🥺also what do you think her fashion sense is like
*looks at you right back with even bigger wet eyes* HIIIII! Im so sorry for getting back to you so late, please forgive me, I've been very busy and didn't even notice I had this ask
⭐️ Sirius Sundays ⭐️
Here are my transfem Sirius headcannons! (I love her so much), (I hope you don't mind that I included this in my Sirius Sunday thing);
Her style:
I think it probably wouldn't stray too far from what she'd already wear pre transition; for wizards skirts and dresses aren't that far off from robes so styles of clothing wouldn't really feel too different for her.
In terms of muggle clothing style specifically she'd still wear a lot of boot cut jeans and bell bottoms, a lot of band shirts and her leather jacket, she'd probably just style them a little differently, now with things in her hair, more jewellery and makeup and stuff.
However, I do also think she would raid Lily, Mary, and Marlenes wardrobes to find things that she likes. I think once Sirius came out, the girls would have basically adopted her as their protégé, teaching her anything and everything she wants to know about girlhood.
I think she'd like Mary's wardrobe best, I always hc Mary as a very fashionable person who likes to experiment and be bold with her outfits, and Sirius would love the sparkly dresses and bold colours stuffed into her wardrobe, and she'd have the best time trying everything on and doing a little fashion show for her friends.
I think as well she would wear a lot of skirts. She'd like the way they feel, how flowy they are and how cute they look, and they help her pass better in the beginnings of her transition, and also she knows she's got amazing legs so she doesn't mind showing them off a bit (showing them off to one specific person, more like).
I think, even though she'd try to pass more with typically "feminine colours", blue would be her best colour. Pretty shades of dark iridescence and periwinkles as well, she'd have lots of dresses, skirts, and coats in various shades of blue, and they'd always make her feel most pretty and feminine. Especially some blue eyeshadow or eyeliner. James would call her new penchant for blue a betrayal and tell her to go join Ravenclaw for being such a traitor (and then secretly tell her she's pretty and looks great at the same time).
Tall girls being even taller in high heels is a weekness of mine, and if I knew Sirius in real life, she'd abuse that weakness. I think anytime theres a party or a fancy event on, she'd put a pair of high heels on. They'd make her feel so pretty and feminine, and she'd be so tall. At first she refused to wear any shoe that wasn't flat on the foot because "girls are meant to be shorter than guys, right?" but then everyone told her that was stupid and peer pressured her into a high heels, and made sure she felt amazing in them.
In public, Sirius is very amendment on passing. She's done her research and always wears the most feminine clothing in muggle areas, wears the girls uniform to school, puts on eyeliner and lipstick, pitches her voice up, etc etc, and it's very important to her that she passess. With her friends she relaxes a little, when it's just them in a private area (esp just the marauders because they've seen the most over her over the years and she knows they don't really care), but she still pitches her voice up and wears typically feminine "colours" or "clothing". However, when with James or at home with just the Potters, she doesn't try at all; she'll often use her natrual voice, doesn't ever try to tuck or wear anything really feminine unless she just feels like doing so, she'll let her stubble come in from time to time even, until annoys her, and they never make her feel bad for it. James still calls her gorgeous every day, and Effie and Flea still call her their daughter. They make her feel extremely comfortable.
I think she'd love wearing her hair in double plaits, she'd look so cute like that and she likes how feminine it is, and it would also make her feel like the little girl inside her is coming alive, because all through the first and second years of school, all the girls in their year would have worn double plaits to class. So not only would it be cool and cute, it would be a way for her to feel like she's experiencing the girlhood she missed out on when she was younger. (Maybe James learnt how to braid so he could do it for her before bed if she's tired, and in the mornings so she could do her makeup and stuff at the same time so they wouldn't be late to work / class)
I also think she'd go through a phase where she'd grow her hair as long as possible just to see how long she can get it. Her record is just past her arse and she's very proud of it.
She'd love playing around and experimenting with hairstyles as well. She'd 100% go through bad phases of strange styles and all of her friends just have to grin and bear it, because if a very high side pony is what makes her feel best this week, than they're not going to crush her soul, they know she'll grow out of it soon enough. She does have taste afterall.
She'd get so pissed off about the lack of pockets in everything when she starts shopping for muggle womens clothes, and you know the minuet she finds a dress with pockets she'd show it off to everyone. She'd get so excited and wear the dress for like a month straight, no fucks given, only pockets.
She'd practice makeup looks on the Marauders all the time. James is her most willing model, of course, he'd let her do anything she wanted, but sometimes she'd want to practice on someone with a similar complexion to her, or with a different eye or lip shape or whatever, or sometimes if James isn't around to model. She'd wrangle Remus and Pete into getting their makeup done by her, and they argue the whole time even though they secretly enjoyed it a lot.
Before she came out to Effie and Flea - maybe especially if she was still living at 12GWP at the time she figured it out - and she started experimenting with her gender to figure it out, she wanted to try womens underwear and stuff, but she didn't want to be seen / caught buying it when she was still perceived as a bloke, so she made a bunch herself. She cut her breifs into knickers shape and made makeshift braletts out of old shirts and pyjamas (she had to learn how to sew for this too), and one day Effie or Flea came along to do her washing and found all the janky looking underwear and just went to her like "right, good effort darling but I'm taking you shopping for some real undergarments that actually fits you properly an doesn't look like it went through a blender".
Hc's about her transition;
I feel like she only figured out she was trans later in life, probably after she ran away to the Potters and started to really work on becoming her best self, or possibly just figured it out right before she ran away, and that was the kind of final reason to do it because she knew she had a better chance of acceptance with them <3
I am a tall Sirius truther till the day I die, so obviously she'd be a very very tall woman and this would make Marlene very jealous, and she'd constantly tease Marlene for being so short.
You already know that James is the first person she told, and if this is all happening in the 70s/80s, he probably would have been a little confused by the concept at first and didn't understand it at all. He would have never heard of transexuality and people swapping genders, but he would have still accepted her immediately. He would have asked so many questions, not only to make sure he was doing all the right things to make sure Sirius felt comfortable, proud, and happy throughout her transition, but also because he was extremely curious. He would have done a lot of research for her. (If Sirius wants something, Sirius gets it, so if she wants to be called she and a woman now, James is going to give 110% effort).
All of her friends have had a crush on her at one point, no matter their sexuality (eg pre transition + post), and she's pretty indifferent to people having feelings or attraction towards her, doesn't really care about it at all, but she does like to brag about it with her friends. And she loves to hold it over their heads lol.
I think if she came out whilst still in Hogwarts, she would have just gaslit everyone into thinking she was never a bloke. She'd get all her friends in on it, along with McGonagall of course, and anytime someone asked why she was wearing the girls uniform everyone would just be like "she's a girl wtf are you going on about? no, she was never a bloke, do you need me to take you to the sick wing?"
I think as well, after she came out, she would have gotten a lot closer with the girls. She'd love the way that girls all talk to each other, she'd love the constant drama and gossip, and she'd love how in touch and normal they are about their own emotions. Of course, Sirius has always felt she can talk to James about everything, and she does, but she likes how she can have deeper conversations more casually with the girls and in a group setting and stuff. She'd love how they always immediately validate her feelings and give her proper good advice and can relate to her problems in their own ways. But James would get extremely jealous of this and always try to intervene on girls night - it would never work, but Sirius promised to give him the best gossip when she gets home.
Back to Sirius being drop dead gorgeous, I think after she came out all the blokes on like the quidditch team and in their year would start fancying her, hoping to get a shag or whatever, and would constantly talk to James about it (they'd especially be asking if James and Sirius are actually together now that she's a girl because they're that close, James never gives them a real answer, just tells them Sirius isn't interested), and of course James would tell her all of this. They'd think it's so funny, but it's also strange because suddenly all of Sirius casual mates and quidditch team want a shag with her and it's weird. Again she's indifferent to it, has no interested in any of their advances, but it is odd when all the blokes who used to call her "a good lad" and would crudely talk about girls in the locker room around her, are now interested in her.
I think she'd love taking photos throughout her transition to track her progress. So then on days she feels like shit she can look back through them and see how much she's grown and feel as beautiful as she is again.
Thank you for the ask, I really love receiving them! I had a lot of fun compiling this list actually, I haven't written out all my transfem Sirius hc's before. I really love her so much and she deserves some more recognition tbh. She's the best. :P
#jay answers#⭐️ Sirius Sundays ⭐️#MtF Sirius#Sirius Black#please ignore my subtle hints at prongsfoot if you're a wolfstar shipper or whatever#or don't. I don't mind#actually don't ignore them. James and Sirius kiss mwah mwah mwah and he's the best boyfriend to Sirius in the world and they love snogging#and smooching and shagging and cuddling naked oohlala and Sirius is the best girlfriend in the world to him and they're so sweet and perfec#for eachother and love eachother so much and James uplifts her everyday and she was so nervous about telling him her feelings because she's#trans and he was like shut the fuck up i think you're hot no matter what also i fell in love with you the moment you told me you were trans#cause i realised that you trusted me more than anyone else in your life and that means a lot to me also i think you're beautiful and perfec#and gorgeous and i already did worship the ground you walked on and now i also worship the air you breathe please marry me and love me to#the day you die because i will love you for longer my gorgeous wife#and then they fuck nasty#i will not stop with the prongsfoot agenda#SHIP THEM YOU PUSSIESSSSS#they're soulmates#mentions of the potters being the best people in the world#jay writes#James Potter#<< tagging cause he gets mentioned a lot in this and what is sirius without james anyway? answer; extremely depressed and imprisioned#and we can't have that#transfem Sirius Black#marauders era#sirius black headcanon#trans sirius black#trans sirius#trans sirius headcannon#transfem sirius headcanon#the potters
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wake up
think about Elvira and her butch girlfriend
think about Elvira and her butch girlfriend
think about Elvira and her butch girlfriend
think about Elvira and her butch girlfriend
think about Elvira and her butch girlfriend
think about Elvira and her
#i actually recently read her memoir and loved reading her describe their current relationship#not poly myself but if elvira and her girlfriend ever were looking for a third; i would jump at the opportunity. i mean what who said that#elvira mistress of the dark
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girlfriend stayed over last night and made me steak + roasted veggies (and she let me cook quinoa for us) and after the steak was cooked she cut the fat off for me and cut the actual steak for me which is the literal sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me🥺 and then i fell asleep while she was fingering me because she put me onto mess-free period sex and apparently she stopped and i woke up and was like “why did you stop :(“ and then fell back asleep which sounds on brand for me even though i don’t remember that but what i do remember is waking up again and deciding i needed a chicken sausage (cold, directly from the fridge, which was NOT delicious) and then going to bed?? But then today we went to this park she’s apparently been wanting to go to which i didn’t know until we were there but omggg it was so pretty there was a dock and then a little floating dock that rocks with the waves and it was just sososo nice !! She’s planning on staying over again on monday and tuesday!!
(as always, bonus content in the tags)
#i also bled all over my pants bc she has me trying the discs and i’m just not used to them yet#so she took me to her house to take a shower and give me clean clothes 🥺#And she also washed the clothes i bled in!!#and her best friend is an ANGEL who started the shower for me and got it the perfect temperature and let me use her soap!!#And then before i left she made me the best smoothie i’ve ever had !!!!!#Bascally i have the best girlfriend literally ever and both she and her best friend give me princess treatment???#i already call her best friend her ‘real girlfriend�� we could be a cute ass trio fr#like my girl made a comment about them both fucking me together (this morning before we were at her house)#and i said im not into that kinda thing#but the more i think about it the more i think i could be very down??#my life actually is starting to feel like a movie a little bit because this is the most insane situation for me(a famous hater of polyamory)#jk i don’t actually hate polyamory but i did explore it a bit when i was younger and i hated it /for me/#dykeposting#lesbian#lesbian blog#wlw#wlw blog#lesbian nsft#sapphic
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