#if I want to reach the level of professionalism and reliability that is necessary and required for the job

[canisalbus]

Not quite sure how to politely phrase this so I'll just be blunt, sorry, but would you ever open commissions? I'd pay big bux to get my priest mouse drawn by you

I do commissions extremely rarely, I'm afraid. It's not that I don't like drawing for people (or that I have no use for that extra income), I just can't handle the additional pressure and deadlines that well at all at the moment. Sorry!

[antiquity1111]

BNHA 389 Japanese to English Translation + Commentary

迫る爆発…‼︎

せまるばくはつ…‼︎

The imminent explosion…!!

No.389 安心と祈り

ナンバー389 あんしんといのり

No.389 Assurance and Prayer

安心 (romaji: anshin) is a noun meaning “peace of mind (as is inspired by the trust you feel through faith in a higher power or a person whose actions have proven them to be a reliable and trustworthy source of comfort); relief; (sense of) security; safety; assurance; confidence.” Ultimately, it makes no difference whether one translates this word as “relief” or “assurance.” What matters is that this word, which makes up the first half of the chapter title, refers to Shouto, who has achieved his identified goal of becoming a Hero who, like All Might in his heyday, “reassures others and puts them at ease” with his mere presence. Because Shouto specifically stated that he wanted to become a Hero who “reassures” people, that is how I chose to translate anshin.

The second half of the chapter title, “prayer,” is a reference to the frightened civilians, many of whom are shown praying for a savior throughout the chapter. Shouto is the answer to their prayers, as All Might was in the past. This became possible for Shouto when he chose to stop Dabi through any means necessary, despite their blood connection and Touya’s visibly precarious health. The civilians were initially wary of Shouto after Dabi’s reveal because they could not be certain that Shouto would not choose his personal obligation to his brother over his professional obligation to the civilians, but Shouto proved that he is someone Heroes and civilians can trust to put “Hero” first by insisting on being the one to “fight” and “stop” the “Villain” Dabi, ignoring Touya’s every effort to connect on a familial level, and focusing exclusively on “subduing” the threat Dabi posed to Heroes and civilians. Their battle was not so much brother versus brother as it was Hero versus Villain, and Shouto was prepared to win to save, whatever the cost. Horikoshi LOVES to use splitting faces vertically into distinct halves as a visual metaphor for conflicting aspects of a person. For both Shouto and Enji, their scarred (left) side, which for Shouto happens to correspond to his fire, represents the Hero profession and their commitment to it. It represents who they want to be as Heroes. The scarred portion of their faces is emphasized when they are showing up as Heroes first, while the smooth, unscarred portion of their faces is highlighted when they are showing up as people first. If you revisit the Shouto- and Endeavor-related chapters of the war thus far, you’ll notice a pattern: Shouto is almost always drawn with his scarred “Hero” side spotlighted and Endeavor’s face is drawn full-on, both sides equally represented (and conflicting), more often than not. Symbolically, this indicates that Shouto was not approaching Touya as a brother. He was approaching him as any Hero would any Villain, and that (and other reasons) is why he failed. Endeavor, for his part, is caught between competing interests. Enji is Touya’s father and needed to have shown up as a person first if he was to have had any hope of reaching him, but he is also the Number One Hero and has a responsibility to Japan and the world to stop the Villains, even if that meant turning his back on his family (= Touya) one more time to prioritize dealing with AFO, as the war’s tactical team stipulated and Shouto demanded, and even if it now means that all he can do is die with Touya in a fiery inferno that should have, could have, and would have been avoided had he at any point prioritized being there for his firstborn son over being a Hero. It seems that in the end Enji was a shitty father, but Endeavor was an awesome Hero.

中心温度の上昇速度が鈍化してる！ ちゅうしんおんどのじょうしょうそくどがどんかしてる！

= “The speed at which the core temperature rises is slowing down!”

計算が更新されてます けいさんがこうしんされてます

= “[I am] updating the calculations!”

じゃあこのまま————

= “So, keeping the same [pace]———”

いや低下はしてない いやていかはしてない

= “No, it’s not slowing down!”

爆発は免れない‼︎ ばくはつはまぬがれない‼︎

= “The explosion is unavoidable!!”

免れる (romaji: manukareru) is a verb meaning “to escape (disaster, death, etc.); to be saved from; to be rescued from; to avoid (e.g., punishment); to evade (e.g., responsibility); to avert; to elude; to be exempted from.”

What is being communicated is that the situation is such that a massive, high-pressure explosion is inevitable and everyone unfortunate enough to be caught in the estimated 5-kilometer blast radius will be incinerated. It cannot be contained. It cannot be stopped. There is no escaping it.

ああ

= “AH”

ああ

= “AH”

アハ

= “AHA”

アハァ

= “AHAA”

I’m torn between thinking this is the sound of Touya breathing haggardly and thinking he is trying to laugh… He did say, “Whether [a person] cries or laughs, tomorrow comes equally. So, let’s laugh, Himiko Toga. People live to laugh! … The ones laughing at the end of that (= the Miserable Parade) will be us” (No.341).

みんなが見てるよ みんながみてるよ

= Everyone is watching / looking at [me].

ああこんなものか

= So, this is what it’s like?

もの (romaji: mono) is a common Japanese word with a number of uses. It can function similarly to the English “because” and indicate that the speaker is attempting to explain and/or excuse something or it can express emotional involvement, often frustration or dissatisfaction. Here, it appears as a sentence ending particle suggesting that Touya remains unhappy despite finally having his family’s attention.

こんな簡単な事だったなら こんなかんたんなことだったなら

= If it was such a simple thing,

Look at that lopsided smile. He’s proud of the Miserable Parade. This is the Heroes getting their “just desserts.” This is Touya Todoroki and Himiko Toga taking a stand for the children they were and striking back at the people who did and have continued to make their lives miserable.

撤退だァ てったいだァ

= “Retreat!!”

巻き込まれるぞ退けえ‼︎ まきこまれるぞひけえ‼︎

= “Withdraw or you’ll be caught in [the blast zone]!!”

もっと早くに もっとはやくに

= [you should have done it] sooner.

Let’s talk about Touya’s final line of the chapter. Beginning on page 6, Touya says, “If it was such a simple thing...” If identifies this as a conditional statement, that is, a statement with a clear hypothesis followed by a logical conclusion. The conclusion is the result of the hypothesis. The basic structure of a conditional statement is “if this, then that,” albeit not all conditional statements are written in the “if-then” form.

The next thing Touya says is “sooner.” Yes, just that. You see, Japanese doesn’t require that every word be given when the meaning can be inferred from context. The second half of Touya’s conditional statement is composed of just two words and one particle: もっと早くに. もっと (romaji: motto) is an adverb meaning “more; longer; farther; further.” 早く (romaji: hayaku) is another adverb meaning “early; soon; quick; fast.” Literally, Touya is saying, “If it was such a simple thing [to look at me], more soon / more quick / more early.” That is a fine sentence in Japanese, but it raises more questions than it answers in English. What does Touya mean by “more soon / more quick / more early”? Context clues can help us to answer that question. There are four types of conditional sentences. Touya’s is the third type, which is “used to explain that present circumstances would be different if something different had happened in the past” (https://www.grammarly.com/blog/conditional-sentences/).

Had Touya’s family acknowledged him sooner, none of this would have happened. Their damning inaction led to his damning action. For two decades Touya had believed that if his family would only look at him, everything wrong would be made right. Now they are looking at him, but nothing has changed. Their acknowledgement comes too late to save his life (or theirs). He burned to death as a child on Sekoto Peak because of their negligence, and he is burning to death as an adult on Gunga Mountain because of their negligence. “Sorry, it’s my fault” doesn’t change reality. It can’t undo the hurt, heal the damage, or rewrite history. It can’t give Touya his life back. Horikoshi has long described the Todoroki family as “Hellish,” but only Touya was actually consumed and destroyed by it. No one else died, and everyone else had at least one person supporting them. Touya was scapegoated and had no one, and it shows when you compare his outcome to his siblings’ outcomes and even to his parents’. This all could have been avoided had the Todorokis sincerely reached out to Touya any time prior to being threatened with their and everyone else’s impending doom and gloom, but they didn’t. Touya, or Dabi, appears to have not forgiven or forgotten their ambivalence. After all, “the past never forgets” (Viz’s translator exchanged “forget” for “die” to create the iconic Dabi line “the past never dies”; that’s a devastatingly cool one-liner, but it’s not what Touya/Dabi actually said). And consider this: Can the apology of a person with a smoking gun pressed to their temple be trusted to be sincere, or are they just saying whatever they think the would-be shooter needs to hear to keep from scrambling their brains? To be clear, I am NOT saying that Enji and/or Rei are lying about being remorseful for abusing and neglecting Touya. What I AM saying is that Touya has no reason to believe they are being honest (before now, they wouldn’t even acknowledge him). Even if we assume that he does believe them, that does NOT guarantee that he will forgive them—or anyone, for that matter—for what happened.

Personally, I am NOT of the opinion that Touya INTENDED to store up thermal energy to trigger a mass-scale explosion. Not long ago, in No.351, Touya was screaming for Shouto to “burn and die for our sake,” which implied that he was fighting not only for someone else’s freedom and survival (= the League of Villains’) but for his own. It would not make sense, then, for Touya to INTENTIONALLY do anything certain to jeopardize both his life and safety and theirs, like the police and Heroes imply he did. We know Touya cares about the League of Villains, but the police and Heroes don’t know that, and when Touya alluded to caring about the League of Villains during his match against Shouto and three of Endeavor’s sidekicks, Shouto and the other Heroes ignored him. They were there to take Dabi down, not to try to understand and sympathize and relate with him. What matters to him does not matter to them. His “personal and ideological” (his words, not mine) reasons for fighting in the war are irrelevant (to the police and Heroes).

Touya’s Quirk is tied to the intensity of his emotions. The more passionately he feels about something, the more powerful and difficult to manage his fire becomes. Touya became increasingly upset as his and Shouto’s battle went on and the condition of his body deteriorated. He tried unsuccessfully to escape the situation by killing Shouto and the others and was blasted by Phosphor, the equivalent of a high-powered extinguisher designed to protect everyone else from his flames, several times, further damaging him and preventing the extreme heat generated by his Quirk from being more gradually released into the atmosphere, causing thermal energy to build up inside his body to an explosive degree. At the time of Shouto’s final combo attack, Touya was sure he would be killed if he was unable to replicate Shouto’s Phosphor. His ingenuity and strong will to live, or at least not to die, are what allowed him to copy the special technique Shouto had spent considerable time developing and has yet to perfect. Upon regaining consciousness, Touya marveled at his good fortune for having survived Shouto’s finishing move but realized that he would physically fall apart before reaching Endeavor if he wasted any more time on Shouto and the other Heroes, so he called out to Skeptic for help and soon after was warped to the Gunga Mountain Villa Ruins. Touya knew before he had even left the Kamino Ward that he was dying. That would upset anyone. And because he can’t calm down (emotional state), he can’t cool down (physical state) enough to prevent the explosion from happening. Rei, Fuyumi, and Natsuo have been trying for THREE chapters to force-cool him to no avail. How much good is spraying cold water on a raging inferno going to do when it’s fueled by emotions that have only superficially been addressed? What Touya needs is to be comforted and soothed, but the Todorokis don’t seem to know how to comfort and soothe him. And of course they don’t. This is someone they pretended not to see or hear until very recently, someone they turned away and turned away from. How would they know how to console him, and how much comfort are they to him anyway?

There are, of course, other ways to interpret Touya’s lines. Pikahlua is a popular translator here on Tumblr and one I respect. What I translated as “if it was such a simple thing, [you should have done it] sooner” they translated as “if it was as simple as this, [do it] sooner.” They explained their reasoning in this post:

I differ from Pikahlua in that I believe the complete sentence would read more like “you should have done it sooner” than “I wish you had done it sooner” or “do it sooner next time” (I don’t think Touya means for there to be a ‘next time’, and he surely doesn’t expect to live for there to be a ‘next time’). Why do I think that? Well, for starters, “you should have done it sooner” sounds more like Touya/Dabi to my ears than Pikahlua’s alternatives. Then there’s the matter of the illustrations. Touya/Dabi is NOT the first character to be drawn featureless save for their eyes. Himiko and AFO have also appeared like this (in No.348 and No.364, respectively). In both cases, it signaled something very, very bad for the Heroes. Why would Touya/Dabi be any different?

Touya/Dabi and Himiko/Toga in particular look alike. In fact, they look so much alike I can’t help but wonder if the likeness was intentional on Horikoshi’s part:

早く‼︎ はやく‼︎

= “Quickly!!”

急いで‼︎ いそいで‼︎

= “Hurry!!”

拳藤ォ‼︎走れェ‼︎ けんどォ‼︎はしれェ‼︎

= “Kendou!! Run!!”

大丈夫‼︎ だいじょうぶ‼︎

= “It’s okay!!”

大丈夫だからね…‼︎ だいじょうぶだからね…‼︎

= “It’ll be okay…!!”

うん

= Yeah.

だって俺たちには——— だっておれたちには———

= “Because we [have]———”

ゴチンコがいるんだぜ‼︎

= “Five Weenies!!”

間に合え——‼︎ まにあえ——‼︎

= Just in time——!!

Take a close look at Shouto’s face. See that scar? That’s his Hero side. He’s charging onto the battlefield the same way he did last time: as a Hero. See that cold, hard stare? That’s also the same as last time. Compared to Shouto’s “inner teen,” Touya’s looked like a hit dog. He looked like a kid outnumbered and jumped in the locker room by schoolyard bullies. Shouto looked like a vicious wolf, ready to kill; Touya looked like a ram, primed for the killing but trying to project strength and confidence. The week that No.351 dropped, I saw a lot of people on my Twitter timeline claiming that these representations of Shouto and Touya are the same age, but that isn’t true. Their uniforms provide insight into their approximate ages. Shouto is wearing his Sports Festival uniform. He was 15 during the Sports Festival, so his symbolic representation is 15. Touya is wearing a standard black middle school uniform, the same one he is wearing in the photograph on the butsuden. 

The most recent picture of the deceased is placed on the butsuden. Touya’s picture was probably taken just before the winter break from school, during which time he disappeared and was presumed to have perished in the terrible fire that scorched Sekoto Peak. He was 13, a week or two shy of his 14th birthday, and still in middle school (8th grade). Shouto was 15 and a high school freshman (10th grade). Schoolboy Touya is two grades younger than Sports Festival Shouto.

While we’re on the subject, and since I have no idea when or if I’ll ever get around to fully translating No.349-352, let me go ahead and point out that Touya is the only person in the series other than Ten/Tenko/Tomura (and Kaina, if you count Horikoshi’s extras) to have more than one “inner child.” The version of Touya’s “inner child” we see in No.351 (“Schoolboy Touya”) is NOT the version of his “inner child” we see in No.352 sobbing and shrieking as Shouto punches and blasts through him (“Sekoto Peak Touya”). It is also NOT the version of his “inner child” we saw in Vol.31 standing alongside Keigo with Endeavor looming overhead (“3-Year-Old Touya”). Here are all three of Touya’s “inner children,” for reference:

Note that with the exception of the Touyas and the Kainas (child, teen, adult), every other character’s “inner child,” or “core self,” is between the ages of 3 and 6. Izuku and Katsuki’s “inner children” are 4, Shouto’s is 5, Keigo’s is 5 or 6, and Himiko’s is 3. Tomura has two 5-year-old “child” selves (one with black hair, pre-massacre, who I call “Ten,” and one with white hair, post-massacre, who I call “Tenko”) and one “adult” self (“Tomura”). Touya’s “inner children” are 13, 13 (slightly older), and 3. I chose not to include “Dabi” in that list as another one of Touya’s “inner children,” but if we were to consider him one, I think 17 would be a good guess at his “age,” as that is how old Touya was when “Dabi was born” (No.350). 

End.

[ranakaushal]

Refurbished iPhones Under ₹20,000: Affordable Excellence at Your Fingertips

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A refurbished iPhone is used, which has been taken through stringent quality check and restoration processes to make it work like new. Tested, repaired if necessary, cleaned, and then set to factory settings, these phones are the best. Here's why they are good:

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Buy at Control Z or even from any authorized resellers, to not get cheated

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The refurbished iPhone should ideally have at least 80 percent of the capacity for safe use

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[alifechoes]

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Each two-room apartment is designed with your comfort in mind. Here’s what you can look forward to while you’re here:

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YouTube Video 1

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[hudsonestell]

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[greython3c]

Commercial contractors near me

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[kevin-mallette]

Choosing the Right Home Backup Generator for Your Needs: A Step-by-Step Guide

Introduction

Welcome to our guide on choosing the right home backup generator for your needs! As a seasoned expert in the energy storage industry, I understand how important it is to have a reliable power source during unexpected outages. In this article, we will explore the key considerations when selecting a home backup generator, providing you with the knowledge to make an informed decision.

Understanding Home Backup Generators

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There are two main types of home backup generators: portable generators and standby generators. Portable generators are compact, versatile, and provide temporary power. On the other hand, standby generators are permanently installed and offer long-term backup power solutions.

Key Factors to Consider

1. Power Output: The first step in choosing a home backup generator is determining your power needs. Make a list of the essential appliances and systems you want to power during an outage, and calculate their total wattage requirements. This will help you select a generator with the appropriate power output.

2. Fuel Type: Home backup generators can be powered by various fuels, including diesel, natural gas, propane, and gasoline. Consider the availability and cost of the fuel options in your area when making your choice.

3. Transfer Switch: A transfer switch is a critical component that connects your backup generator to your home's electrical system. It ensures a safe and seamless transition of power during an outage. Choose a generator that comes with a high-quality transfer switch.

4. Noise Level: Some generators can be noisy, which may be a concern if you have close neighbors or prefer a quieter environment. Look for generators with lower decibel ratings to minimize noise disturbances.

Installation and Maintenance

Proper installation and regular maintenance are essential to ensure the optimal performance and longevity of your home backup generator. It is recommended to hire a licensed electrician to install the generator and set up the necessary electrical connections. Additionally, schedule regular maintenance checks to detect any issues and ensure the generator is in good working condition.

Finding the Right Supplier

Choosing the right supplier is crucial for a smooth purchasing process and reliable after-sales support. Look for reputable suppliers with a strong track record in the industry. Read customer reviews, ask for recommendations, and check if the supplier offers comprehensive warranty coverage and prompt customer service.

Conclusion

Investing in a home backup generator is a smart decision to ensure uninterrupted power supply during outages. By considering factors such as power output, fuel type, transfer switch, and noise level, you can choose the right generator to meet your specific needs. Remember to prioritize professional installation and regular maintenance to keep your generator in optimal condition. If you have any further questions or need assistance, don't hesitate to reach out to a trusted supplier in your area.

References:

The Benefits of home backup generators - ABC Energy

Choosing the Right Fuel Type for Your Backup Generator - XYZ Power Solutions

The Importance of a Quality Transfer Switch - Reliable Electrical

Home Backup Generator Maintenance Guide - Energy Experts

Article by None - Your Trusted Home Backup Generator Brand

[quazartranslates]

Welcome to the Nightmare Game II - CH52

**This is an edited machine translation. For more information, please [click here]**

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

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Chapter 52: Purgatory Reunion (IV)

[Player Qi Leren has arrived in Purgatory and started the task: Sacrifice of the Devil King]

[Task background: Three years ago, the Devil of Slaughter provoked the Devil of Power, and was suppressed by the Devil of Power and the Devil of Fraud in Purgatory’s lake of fire. However, he did not die nor give up, but silently waited for an opportunity. Three years later, the seal was accidentally loosened, and the Devil of Slaughter’s consciousness broke free from the seal and began to look for a way to resurrect...]

[Task requirements: Destroy the Devil of Slaughter and gain one third of the authority of the Devil of Destruction.]

[Data synchronization countdown, ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one, synchronization completed.]

　　&&&

"Oh? So, this martial law is the order of the Devil of Power herself?" a person in leather boots whispered in a sexy, soft voice. If they didn't pay attention, the voice would be covered by the wind passing through the underground passage.

But who dared to not listen carefully? The lower demon secretly glanced at the succubus, facing his smiling yet cold eyes. He looked at him as if he was a maggot crawling on the ground, which scared him, and said in a trembling voice: "I don't know... I just heard..."

"Heard?" The succubus repeated the word, his tone full of deep dissatisfaction.

"No no no, sir, the rumors are likely to be true! There was an abnormality in Purgatory’s lake of fire before, that is, the lake of fire that suppressed the Devil of Slaughter... I think that there may be a problem with the seal on the Devil of Slaughter! That’s it!" the lower demon quickly explained, fearing that the succubus would kill him in annoyance.

"Hehe." The succubus chuckled inexplicably and stopped.

Ahead was a huge underground space, which was too high for the top of the cave to be seen. The fluorescent plants and fluorescent moths covered this pure darkness from their perches on the rock walls, which made it seem as though the cave walls of this bottomless underground nest were dotted with starry light.

They were standing in an underground valley at this time, opposite to another underground valley, and between the two cliffs was a moat-like abyss, with churning red magma flowing under their feet, like a rushing river rushing toward the deeper lake of fire.

"Sir, do you want to pass? The patrol is very strict on the other side, I'm afraid that if you’re found..." The lower demon carefully raised his head and observed the succubus.

The mysterious succubus was studying a crystal in his hand, and the lower demon recognized that it was a life crystal. The original clear crystal has overflowed with black smoke, and there were fine cracks on the crystal’s surface.

It seemed that the owner of this crystal was in a bad situation, no wonder he was in such a hurry…

However, whose life crystal was this? What did it have to do with this succubus?

The succubus was aware of the other’s snooping gaze, and tilted his head to glance at the lower demon behind him. The ruby-like eyes flowed with the innate charm of succubuses, but they were as cold as ice: "Is there a more hidden path?"

The lower demon did not dare to look at him again. He bowed his head to suppress his rapid heartbeat, but he still saw the succubus’ long legs that were wrapped in leather pants so tight he may as well have been naked. After mentally rehearsing ten times, he said cautiously: "There is indeed one."

Magma ran rapidly through the canyon, and the succubus’ smile as he stood on the cliff deepened, murmuring in a dreamy way: "That's great."

It seemed that he had saved his small life, and the lower demon breathed a sigh of relief. Since he had been caught by this mysterious succubus an hour ago and forced him to "sell" a slew of intelligence, he was always in awe. As a well-known information broker near Purgatory, he was cautious in his daily life, rarely came forward himself, and lived a very low profile. So when he woke up this time and found a succubus sitting on the bay window opposite the bed, smiling as he twirled a dagger in his hand, he was really scared.

Comfortable days had passed for so long that he’d almost forgotten the terror of being on the edge of life and death.

Now, he coaxed the shadowy boss in a desperation to keep him pleased, and helped him hurry to the lake of fire. Anyway, he wasn’t curious... Well, there was still a little curiosity. Who was this succubus working for? What was his purpose for coming to Purgatory at this delicate moment? He definitely wasn’t with the Devil of Power or the Devil of Fraud, otherwise he wouldn’t need to be so careful.

Was he an old follower of the Devil of Slaughter? Or..... was he simply a follower of the fallen Lord of Destruction...

The lower demon did not dare to think about it any more. He lost 10% of his caution. He took the succubus around the patrol line, crossed the magma river in the underground valley, and finally came to the strictest area.

"This is it. Go from here and pass through the warning zone to reach the lake of fire. However, the area around the lake of fire has been completely blocked. I heard that a large-scale conflict broke out last night. Right now, entrance and exit from the lake has been barred. I can only take you this far. Next..." The lower demon rubbed his hands and smiled in a professional manner, fearing that the succubus would turn on him at any moment.

The succubus stood outside the warning zone, and the channels extended in all directions in front of him seemed like an ant's nest. He was afraid that the demons patrolling in the cave would cause a chain reaction.

Qi Leren sighed in his heart. He’d never thought that he would encounter so many difficulties after entering the Underground Ant City.

If it wasn't for the fact that the Court had given him a lot of resources and help, even if he spent ten days or half a month alone, he couldn't so much as touch the right way, let alone find the den of an underground information broker, and even coax and scare him into leading the way.

But even under such efficiency, there was not much time left for him.

There was only less than an hour's journey left to reach the lake, but this journey required vigilance. Qi Leren, who hadn't slept a wink for more than a day, had passed the point of exhaustion, but now was both energetic and filled with anxiety.

He was too afraid that it was too late.

"The conflict last night, tell me in detail," the succubus said lightly.

"This... is suspected to be caused by the old Devil of Destruction’s people. Specifically... I didn't go to work because I was with you so early this morning. The detailed information can be presented to you immediately when I go back and sort it out!"

The succubus hissed, and his red eyes showed deep contempt and murderous intent: "Do you still need to tidy up?"

"No no no no, I mean... I only have hearsay, I haven't tried to verify it, I'm afraid it’s not reliable."

"Let's hear it."

"Okay, sir. About a month ago, the lake of fire began to behave strangely, and died down after an underground volcanic eruption, but two days ago, several big demons from the underworld appeared near Purgatory. All of them were the old staff of the Lord of Destruction, and they seemed to explore something near the lake of fire. Since the fall of the Destroyer, they seldom come out, and this time they suspiciously appeared together. That is, in these two days, a low-level demon disappeared and was killed near the lake of fire. This kind of thing is very common, and we did not pay attention until last night..."

The lower devil's face showed a complex expression of fear and reverence. He lowered his voice and excitedly told the secret: "Last night, someone saw the body of a high-level demon in the canyon downstream of the lake of fire, soaked in lava, and flowing down along the magma... There were as many ants, which were crushed by the dark pressure. Then the whole of Purgatory went under martial law, and the lake of fire area became particularly strict. If you try to enter carelessly, you’ll be killed!"

"Who did it?" asked the succubus.

"We don't know that, but there is a clue. Last night, a demon heard a dragon roaring near the lake of fire. At that time, the whole canyon around the lake of fire was shaking, like an earthquake. The stones collapsed and fell everywhere. He ran quickly but saw nothing else."

"A dragon roaring..." the succubus whispered thoughtfully.

Getting the map of this area, he let the hapless demon information broker go. Qi Leren took off the "costume" he had used while undercover with the Slaughter Secret Society, changed into clothes more convenient for movement, and threw the fancy leather boots covered with sequins and silver chains on his feet back into the item bar, then hurriedly walked into the cave.

The dragon roaring last night was probably Ning Zhou awakening to the power of Destruction and transforming into a magic dragon. Was the big fight last night related to Ning Zhou's final death? Qi Leren couldn't be sure. Right now, he couldn't wait to fly to him when he thought of how close Ning Zhou was.

He had to catch up, and he would catch up. Qi Leren shook his fist, equipped the necessary skill cards, and touched the Prophet's Heart item hanging on his chest. He wanted to pass this area of the martial law’s warning zone. In addition to relying on maps and hidden technology, he had to rely on Secretly Observing. If it was really impossible...

Even with the Prophet’s Heart, he would have to forcibly cross the warning zone into the lake of fire.

He couldn't wait any longer.

Prepared psychologically, Qi Leren took a deep breath and strode forward.

……

……

……

The last guard post was already ahead, and [Secretly Observing] has also entered cooldown. Qi Leren’s body was tightly pressed to the rock wall, listening to the footsteps getting closer and closer. The patrolling demons held torches, which lit up the dark environment.

It seemed to be just a few ordinary demons, otherwise they wouldn't need torches to see.

Below this cliff was a huge "lake", with smoke rising above the brightly burning lava, making this cold underground like a burning hell. This was the lake of fire. Ning Zhou was here.

Qi Leren closed his eyes and calculated the most likely way to break through.

The patrolling demons were in groups of two. It would be very difficult for him to kill two demons silently at the same time. Once he failed, the demons on the guard post nearby would set off a chain reaction... If there’s a storm ahead, take a detour...

There was a loud bang, and the demons on patrol stopped and whispered, "What happened? Is it going crazy again? "

"Who knows. Be careful, don't be too lazy. Many people died yesterday."

The ground suddenly shook, as if an earthquake had broken out!

Loose rocks on the rock wall fell down in pieces, causing a lot of turmoil. Qi Leren, who was waiting for an opportunity, took this opportunity to rush out. When the two patrolling demons panicked, he took care of them sharply and neatly. Rather than dealing with the bodies, he went through the last sentry post as the rocks continued falling and rushed to the cliff ahead without looking back.

It was as if a window had been opened in the huge rock wall. Qi Leren stood at this window and looked down.

As far as he could see, the world was a vast red, bigger and more cruel than the scene in his dream. The air was so hot that he couldn't breathe, his mouth only seeming to suck the hot flames into his lungs and ignite his body.

The terrible height and heat made Qi Leren dizzy. It was difficult to imagine a glacier here, because the glacier would quickly melt in his mind.

This hot land made up of hot magma was like being placed in a high-pressure boiler, extremely hot. Even if there was a distance of more than 100 meters from the magma beneath his feet, the heat was like a red soldering iron pressed against his skin.

It wasn’t just hot, it was a painful torment. Just standing here was like a desperate slug on an asphalt road, dried by the hot August sun.

Qi Leren gawked at the sight beneath his feet. This scarlet lake of fire was burning, and a few black rocky islands were baked in it... No, it wasn't all rocks.

One of the black, half-submerged shadows in lava was...

This scene overlapped with his dying dream—the black dragon slowly sank into the lake of fire, never to exist again.

Was it too late? Was he already too late?

Qi Leren's legs went soft and he knelt on the ground, his mind going blank.

There was another loud noise, and the magma spewing out of the lake set off a surging wave in the lake of fire, lapping against the black dragon's body. The dragon that had been lying quietly in the lake of fire moved, and Qi Leren also moved at the sight of it.

The black dragon raised its head and looked at the thick domed ceiling. Its claws extended from under the lave, slapped hard on the lake of fire’s surface, and then roared. In a flash, the whole underground lake shook crazily, and the whole world seemed to be turned upside down. The magma gathered into a tsunami and washed in all directions. The surrounding rock walls dropped stones that crashed into the lava, and the rock wall above them...

The dome of the underground cave, the top of which couldn’t be seen, seemed to be torn apart by the terrible power. Suddenly huge stones were falling, pouring down in a heavy rain that made the surface of this flaming lake more and more turbulent. It turned into a horrible hell where fire fell like rain!

The black dragon stood in the lake of fire, and the overwhelming burning stones lit up the dark underground world. It was angry, sad, and desperate, and countless negative emotions gathered in it, making it roar at the invisible sky—

The dome cracked, and the top of the underground cave was torn open by the violent force, so that a beam of light pierced the earth and fell into Purgatory.

It was light, not the burning flames of sulfur and magma.

Just after the light fell, a familiar call crossed the distance between life and death and came to its ears:

"Ning Zhou—!!!”

Maybe it was because of the light, or maybe it was because of this voice, but the furious black dragon suddenly quieted down. It stood quietly in the lake of fire, looking at the distant hole in the rock wall, which was brighter than the sun.

Amidst the bright holy light, a silvery white light like fine gauze slowly stretched out, just like a huge lotus flower in full bloom. In that light, there is a mirage of paradise at dusk, and countless hymns were played there, washing away one’s inner pain.

In this light, a holy angel with white wings fell from the cliff and fell from Heaven toward Purgatory’s lake of fire without hesitation.

The holy and elegant white wings fluttered gently. The warm and quiet power extinguished the raging flames burning on the lake of fire along the way, and the terrible suffocating heat dissipated with them, turning into a paradise in the light. The reflection of Heaven appeared on the lake of fire wherever he passed.

The holy angel landed on a black rock in the lake of fire, just in front of the dragon.

And the light falling from the broken dome just happened to fall on him.

The earth shaking world had subsided, the downpour of fiery rain had subsided, and the scarred black dragon had also subsided.

They stared at each other as if they were staring at their own souls. One was full of cracks that were on the verge of breaking, and the other was about to be pulled by despair into the abyss of Destruction.

It was at this moment that they were all redeemed by gentleness.

-----

The author has something to say:

PS: They finally meet again! This scene is ranked as the no.2 scene that I wanted to write in the second part. It should be more beautiful in my brain... I accidentally burst the word count OTZ, First explain the cause and effect clearly, and then start a sweet love ^_^

By the way, everyone should have guessed how Ning Zhou died before, right?

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Editor’s Notes: Double update today because I think this and the next chapter are best read side by side. Please continue on~

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[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

[606writings]

Could i request a Saeran and Saeyoung scenario where the MC has been secretly going to therapy for her mentally abusive mom and didn't wanna tell them because they had it way worse? Or just Saeran, whicherver you prefer. I could use something like this rn haha

SC: Therapy [Saeran]

Genre: Fluff.

Word count: 2,434.

You were coming out of your therapy session later than usual; you had a heavy and very emotional session and things dragged on way longer than what you expected. Your eyes were all swollen and your face was completely flushed because you had spent the last two hours crying non-stop.

Fuck, I’m late.

You thought to yourself, looking at your phone to check the hour. It was already 2:45 p.m., you were supposed to be home by 2:30 to receive your boyfriend.

I hope I don’t look like a mess by the time I get there…

While running down the street, both your hands were busy tying up your hair in a bun, sniffling and trying to regain your composure. You didn’t want Saeyoung or Saeran asking why you looked like that when you were “just buying groceries”.

You had to admit going to therapy wasn’t an easy thing to do, but what made it much worse was the fact that no one knew about it and you had to keep it a secret from your closest friends and even your boyfriend.

It wasn’t something you were ashamed of, in fact you always tried to encourage everyone around you to reach out for help when they needed it. And, of course you wouldn’t be ashamed of getting professional help when Saeran, the love of your life and the most important person to you, was going through the same thing.

You always tried to show him all the love and support he needed throughout his process of recovery, you were happy to be by his side and help him. But that was exactly why you hadn’t told anyone about your own problem; you didn’t want to be a burden to him or the rest of the RFA, you felt that it was not necessary.

Since you were younger, you were used to take care of yourself and be responsible of your own health –physical and mental health—. That’s why it wasn’t something new for you to go through difficult processes alone.

After another 15 minutes of bus ride, you were finally a few meters away from the home you shared with the Choi twins.

You stopped for a moment in front of the door trying to catch your breath and act as if nothing ever happened, but the moment you extended your hand to reach the front door you stood frozen.

I forgot the groceries! You screamed internally, realizing you had no excuse to why you arrived home so late and empty handed.

Usually, you got out of your session early enough to go to the supermarket and buy some things to prepare a special dinner. Every week you did Saeran’s favorite dish knowing it must have been a rough day for him.

Even if you two were going through the same process of recovery, you wouldn’t dare to compare your own trauma to his. You were convinced he had it much worse. Sure, you had a mentally abusive mom and a frustrated childhood due to your parent´s negligence, but at least you could go out of your house without gangsters hired by an important politician going after you every second.

Saeran didn’t have to deal with your problems, he already had enough by himself.

The moment you were back into your senses, you thought of walking to the nearest supermarket and buy at least frozen food and some ice cream, you could invent some sort of excuse on your way back home. But your plans were ruined by the motion sensor camera, that had already alerted Saeyoung of your presence in front of the house.

The door opened suddenly showing a confused red head looking at you with expectation.

“MC, why are you so late? You should have called me to pick you up.” Saeyoung asked, leaning his head lightly in confusion.

“Ah… I—I forgot my purse, and I…” Your eyes suddenly lit up when the perfect lie crossed your mind. “And I thought I left it at the store, but then after a long time looking for it, I realized I forgot it at home.”

With your head nodding fervently trying to look convinced, you pursed your lips to avoid any more words to come out of it and ruin your excuse.

Saeyoung looked even more confused, and with furrowed brows he pointed at something below you:

“Your purse is on your right hand.”

You looked down and, once again in less 5 minutes you froze in your place, amazed by your stupidity.

“Well… I…“ With your eyes still locked on your right hand, you searched in our head looking for any explanation, before being interrupted by a calmer voice.

“What’s going on? Why aren’t you getting in?” Saeran asked, walking passed his brother and reaching out to take your hand and guide you inside.

Saeyoung locked the door behind you still looking cautiously at you.

“MC… You didn’t even go to the supermarket, did you?” He asked kindly.

You avoided his gaze with your hands still holding firmly Saeran’s, when you felt your boyfriend stop abruptly in front of you. He turned around and looked at you, noticing how you had brought nothing, and then looked at his brother.

“I did! It’s just that… Ummm, it’s just…” Your voice started getting smaller and smaller as you spoke, no excuse arrived on time to your mind to get you out of the current situation.

“MC…” A soft and cold hand took your chin and gently made you look at the loving eyes in front of you. Saeran was analyzing your face with a calm expression on his. “I can tell you’re lying. If there’s something going on, you can tell me.”

Looking at his noble expression, you started feeling bad for hiding something from him. Even though you thought it was better this way, you didn’t like it a single bit.

Since there was no believable excuse for you to tell them, you resigned and considered telling the truth.

“You know if there’s something you need to tell us we’ll help you with anything you need.” Saeran spoke once again, giving you the reassurance you needed to take the final step and tell them the truth.

“Uh, I feel like this is something you need to talk just the two of you, so I’ll be in my room until you need me…” Saeyoung said switching his stare between you and his twin, sensing his time to step out of the conversation, and then walked out slowly.

You witnessed as he left and then looked back at the expecting eyes before you. Clearing your throat, you prepared yourself mentally to talk about the truth:

“Ummm… You know I don’t have a good relationship with my parents…”

“Yes, I do remember that…” He raised slightly a brow with confusion.

“Well, I think the situation with the is a bit more serious than just ‘not getting along’… You could say I was abused by my mother and neglected by my father…” You explained yourself the best you could with all the nervousness flowing inside you. “Oh! But I was not abused physically! They rarely touched me…”

Saeran closed his eyes and made a disgusted grin, showing how he was getting angry about what you were telling him, so you hurried and kept explaining the rest:

“That was a long time ago! I mean, my mom is still as shit as ever but since I don’t talk to her anymore it’s all in the past… That’s why I decided to go to therapy…”

Saeran was listening with his eyes still closed, until you said that last part. It took him by surprise and he wasn’t sure how to react.

“I’ve been going to therapy since we started dating, I wanted to be in my best condition so I could help you too, you know? When I met you, I wanted to be a strong and reliable person for you, but I wasn’t, I had too many things inside me that were holding me back…”

You took a step closer to him and grabbed both his hands, as if that would help you share your emotions and thoughts better.

“I didn’t tell anyone about it because I thought it would be a burden for you, you had enough things to deal with already.” A wave of regret invaded you now that the truth was coming out of your mouth finally. “I’m so sorry for lying and inventing such stupid excuses, but I was convinced it was better this way.”

You stood silent for a few minutes, just holding Saeran’s hands tightly while he looked at you scrutinizing ever word you said.

Finally, after what felt like hours, he opened his mouth to respond with honesty and a bit of hurt in his tone:

“I’m a bit disappointed, MC.” Saeran looked down at your hands holding his, and then looked up at you again, his words taking you by surprise but at the same time, you knew it was a normal reaction.

“I’m slightly disappointed because all this time I’ve been sharing the deepest and darkest parts of myself with you, and I chose to be honest and talk about my past. But you’re still hiding from me.”

His words made sense. He always talked with you about the progress he made every week, even if it was difficult or painful, he wanted you to hear how he was slowly becoming a better and stronger person. That meant a lot to him.

That’s why it saddened him hearing you say you were “a burden to him”, he didn’t expect you to tell him every single detail about your past, but he expected the same level of confidence and honesty from you.

“I know we didn’t go through the same experiences, MC, but please don’t belittle your struggles like that. The reason why I’m trying so hard to get better is because of you. I want to protect you and be with you the rest of my life, making you happy. But I can’t do that if you’re not ready to share things like that with me…”

The weight of his words pierced through your heart. A small part of your chest started burning due to the arousal of emotions waking up inside you. You were speechless to his sincerity and his pained voice, and could tell he was really hurt because of your choices.

“Saeran, I’m so sorry…” Was the only thing you could say in that moment, instead you decided to step forward and pull him into you for a tight embrace, being that the only way you could show him how much you cared for him and how sorry you felt.

He was noticeably surprised by your actions at first, but after a few seconds he raised both his arms and wrapped them around you with gentleness. The moment his hands were placed on your back, all the emotions and tears you had been trying to hide came out suddenly, and between tears you spoke once again:

“I love you so much, I just wanted you to only see the good side of me…! I wanted you to think of me as someone strong enough to help you, but how can I do so if I can’t even deal with my own issues…?”

Your boyfriend sighed at your words.

“MC, I can’t tell you how much I disagree with you.” He replied, taking a small step back just enough to have you two face to face, so you could see the seriousness in his eyes. “You’re the strongest person I know, not because of how much you endure your pain, but because no matter what happens or how much you go through, you always manage to stay bright and see the good things in the world.

“Despite everything, you still smile cheerfully and laugh, you are a loving and caring person and I admire you so much because of that. And now that you tell me about your past and the way you’ve been dealing with that on your own, I admire you even more.

Look at me, I needed your help and my brother’s to realize how wrong and how damaged I was in the past. But you only had yourself to rely on, and still made it through and reached out for help.”

His feelings and thoughts were calming the deepest fears buried in your heart, making you feel thankful for having the most awesome boyfriend ever and being able to be beside him no matter what. Your tears wouldn’t stop falling across your face as he kept talking:

“I don’t need you to only show me ‘your good side’, I need you to show me all of you so we can grow together and become the best of ourselves for each other. I want to know the darkest parts of you so I can light them up and help you through them, just as you are doing with me.”

With his right thumb he gently brushed your tears off, caressing your skin as a silent message of support. Everything he said was leaving a huge impact on you, but his last words sealed any doubt that could be left:

“I love you more than anything else; I love every single thing about you. I want to keep discovering more and more of you, so I can love you even more.” Saeran leaned his face towards yours slowly, his breath warming your wet cheeks as every word left his mouth. “MC, will you let me love you even more from now on?”

Only two seconds passed before you nodded with shyness to his question, giving him the confirmation he so much wanted just before he closed any space left between the two of you to kiss you deeply.

It was as if that kiss erased the fears even you didn’t notice were there, letting you finally be at peace with yourself and be able to admit you needed his help too to go through the journey of recovery. You even felt relieved for finally talking the truth.

This was a new step in your relationship, you were ready now to ask for his help and support from now on, and show him your deepest struggles and fears knowing he would be by your side until you find your own answers.

You sighed in relief after separating your lips from his, and cleared your throat before speaking:

“Thank you, Saeran…” He smiled at you with love. “Let’s do this together from now on, okay?”

[sepublic]

Kikimora and King Parallels?

           All right, so some discussions I’ve had with @50shades-of-blue have got me further thinking with the idea of Kikimora being King’s parallel. Honestly, I could just be projecting my speculation onto her… But with the smug way she passive-aggressively talks to Lilith in front of those kids, and how quick she is to cave into Luz’s threats while otherwise trying to be proper…

           …She lowkey gives me vibes of King, if he like. Had access to ACTUAL power and authority, like he rode on the coattails of Luz or Eda as they ascended, and he KNOWS he’s above everybody else as a result of this! And he’s proud and smug of it, like, “Look at my friend, they’re so cool and powerful! And I’m THEIR friend, what’re you gonna do about it!?” There’s that subtle energy of being a little shit and a gremlin beneath it all… And Kiki comes across as more ‘mature’ because she’s had more experience, access to lessons on ‘proper manners and dignity’, and isn’t constantly frustrated by a lowly position in society and is thus less prone to temper tantrums, but.

           By the end of the day, she’s still a gremlin, and like King, she can get in over her head; So at the first sight of a legitimate issue, she caves into Luz’s threats (though this could just be blamed on runtime issues), just as King quickly defaults to getting the help of someone like Hooty, or running from Half-Cursed Eda! But maybe like King (or not these characters are also contrasts as well), Kikimora is someone who WILL lay her life down whenever her friends are directly threatened… Hence her genuine concern at seeing what Luz did to Belos, and insisting she avenge him afterwards.

           Then, there’s what @50shades-of-blue suggested about Kikimora having been with Belos since the very beginning… Like, the concept of her having been a lowly grifter/scavenger like King, a petty thief down-on-her-luck and with a napoleon complex because of how helpless she was… But she takes to Belos, and acts as a bad-idea friend and lowkey enabler, sort of like King with Luz… But there IS some tenderness and genuine sweetness, perhaps! Like maybe Kikimora DOES care for Belos as an actual friend and not just a vehicle for power (not to say she doesn’t enjoy those benefits either)…

           And you know how King is an author and talks big of himself? If Kikimora is his parallel, then what if she was someone who helped Belos write propaganda and speeches, helped persuade the Boiling Isles to how GREAT this dude was, wrote history in his favor and basically acted as his hype-woman? Sort of like King, but he’s directing his hype-talk towards his friends, which is also something he’d totally do!

           Alternatively, perhaps her relationship with Belos is a lot less warm… Again, as a contrast to Luz and King amidst the parallels, and like how Lilith and Amity are a lot colder and more professional towards one another! Perhaps as a dark reflection of Luz and King’s friendship, Belos and Kikimora only really value one another for what the other can provide; Belos lets Kiki around because she acts as his public face, hyping him up to young generations and spreading his lies to the news outlets. While Kiki supports Belos, because this means power and authority- Almost commensalistic, but Kikimora still has her own things to provide!

           Maybe Kikimora’s relationship with Belos is like King, where she gets away with stuff because she can basically ‘hide behind Belos’ for protection, even if she’s also capable of magic as well! Can you imagine a younger Kiki acting like King, getting a younger Belos roped into her ludicrous schemes to get power or money or whatever, and like Luz, Belos goes along with it… But because he’s not exactly Luz, Belos keeps doing things without really considering the consequences? And he rises as Kikimora’s ‘top minion’ but eventually seizes control for himself… But at the same time he still keeps Kikimora around as a friend and a subordinate, you know?

           And so it’s this idea of Kikimora having lowkey raised him/assisted in his rise to power, kind of like King was a reliable friend to Luz and treats her like as his ‘top minion’, but also as a real friend and makes sure to give her emotional support and love himself! And just as Luz is shaping up to be a powerful witch and likes to humor King’s fantasies, Kikimora helped Belos ‘ascend’ from common thief, as he began to take initiative and control once he got used to how things worked! Just as Luz makes the decision to challenge Belos in Eda’s absence, while King happily follows, even if he also sees himself as having to take care of and protect Luz, regardless of the fact that it’s likely to be the other way around!

           Imagine Belos and Kiki having been like Luz and King, except there’s no Eda to keep them in line… Perhaps their relationship was also a bit more toxic, with Kikimora treating Belos more like an underling at times, but either way some fondness still existed, so when Belos DID rise and ‘overthrow’ Kiki, he still kept her around as a subordinate… Maybe in part to flex the reversal of roles, and because she has genuine use as his hype-woman and not somebody who’s a walking, melting body horror of a flesh-puppet.

          But still; Imagine Dark Luz and King, except they’re just very selfish and enabling towards one another without stopping for self-reflection! Perhaps some issues will come into play about Kiki wanting Belos for himself or something alone those lines, or Belos forgetting about his friend in favor of other connections… Who knows? If Belos is Luz if she never learned her lessons, then perhaps Kikimora could be King sans character development!

          What if when Belos and Kiki first met, she also threatened to eat him or whatever like King joked about, and for a while Belos was legit afraid of this… But he also still hung around her because she provided companionship and guidance! Like Luz and King, troublemakers with hearts of gold, but those hearts are only directed towards one another, mostly, and otherwise they do NOT care about how others are harmed! Basically just utter children by this point.

          For all we know, Kiki’s own past immaturity (a mirror to King’s) lowkey influenced Belos into becoming the horrific, genocidal dictator he is today, a man with no regards for the lives of others he doesn’t care about or who don’t ‘fit in’ with this ideals! Like, perhaps like King during Really Small Problems, Kikimora didn’t want to lose Belos and was possessive of him…

          But instead of maturing, Kikimora opted to isolate Belos from any other friends and positive influences, which contributed to Belos becoming so terrible! And if Belos realizes this, or does… Would he care? Would he care on the principle of how reliable Kiki is to him, or have they reached a point where she’d never betray him regardless because of what SHE has to lose? Not to mention how Belos may see his current path in life as the ‘proper’ one, so perhaps Kiki isolating him was for the best….

          Maybe it’ll directly parallel King’s antics with the Trash Slug, or Sergeant New Guy; Maybe Kiki was even deliberately harsh towards Belos to keep her sense of power and control, but also to keep him dependent upon her… But in the end, Belos became stronger and rebelled! But at the same time, he still kept Kikimora around… Perhaps because there was still some fondness there? Because they still had uses for one another? Maybe Kikimora still has some level of control and manipulation over Belos, at least enough to convince him to keep her around, even if she’s no longer in charge like she used to be…

          And just as Belos may be codependent and even parasitic to the Titan, perhaps Kikimora is the same to him as well? Or at the very least it’s a lot better… Could you imagine if Belos ‘realizes’ Kikimora’s power/manipulation over him? And Belos decides that he’s had enough of her ‘parasitically’ riding on his coattails, but not providing him anything that couldn’t easily be replaced… So he cuts ties by firing Kikimora and replacing her? And alone and dejected, Kiki has nowhere else to gobesides the Owl House?

          Alternatively, Kikimora acts as the only person Belos will listen to that can actively act as a buffer between him and going completely all-out with no reservations or brakes… But then Belos decides to ‘discard’ her because he thinks Kikimora is limiting him, when in reality he’s actually keeping Belos from going too far? Maybe she’ll act as his Voice of Reason, as the only person Belos will listen to when it comes to criticisms and reconsidering his actions…

          Only for that to abruptly end as the Day of Unity nears and Belos becomes more anxious? As Belos’ public face, Kikimora could function as someone who reins the Emperor in. because she’s most familiar with/concerned about the Emperor’s Coven appearing palatable to Belos’ subjects, given how that’s her entire job? So she’ll sometimes advise Belos NOT to utterly eradicate this small community off the face (not the actual skull) of the Boiling Isles, just beat them into submission?

          Not out of a genuine concern for these people, mostly just to be pragmatic, and/or she IS concerned about Belos getting a little too nuts… Then again, we also see Kikimora suggest attacking the Owl House in retaliation for Belos’ damage, and it’s Belos who makes the decision on his own to ‘sate’ the public by pretending to spare Eda’s life, and doesn’t bother trying to actively arrest/suppress them –even if they’re in the middle of the Conformatorium- because that’s just not necessary, and he has better things to do?

          So perhaps instead, Kikimora will operate from an inferiority complex and be the hotheaded one, like King, vouching for Belos to utterly annihilate his opponents, just as King tells Luz to ‘beat up the man and steal his things’, while Belos/Luz offer a more calm, pragmatic approach that doesn’t require violence because they’re more practical like that? Or alternatively…

          It’s BOTH options, just like how King will sometimes encourage Luz to decimate their opponents, but when the time calls for it, he can act as a voice of reason and tell Luz NOT to challenge the Emperor himself! Sometimes Belos wants to commit genocide and Kiki has to rein him in, because what of his reputation…? And sometimes Kikimora will want to go for the nuclear option while Belos calmly suggests just reasoning with people and keeping them satisfied!

          Kikimora suggests making petrifications hidden from the public to prevent them from turning on Belos… But then the Season Finale happens, she feels power slipping away and panics in-part because of her inferiority complex, so she suggests petrifying the ENTIRE crowd as an example! And of course, Belos calmly reminds Kikimora that this isn’t necessary, that believe it or not, people won’t rebel if they’re given what they want!

          Kikimora advises revenge against the Owl House because her pride has been hurt, because she’s felt threatened and vulnerable for the first time in a LONG while, which means she has to utterly eradicate the opposition to leave no room for doubt who’s in charge, to leave no chance of more threats? But Belos is calm, and has control of the situation, he’s not as insecure as Kikimora and is thus less liable to acting rashly when he feels threatened. In essence, they both take turns sharing the brain cell… Just like Luz and King!

[tricktster]

I'm pretty new at aquariums and I don't have a c02 system set up and I don't think my petco was even selling it? Am I doing something wrong? If so, where can I get one???? I don't want to hurt my fish!

GREAT NEWS: YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING WRONG AND YOU ARE NOT HURTING YOUR FISH. 

Sorry this is going to be long but I love nerding out. 

I probably should have just explained this when I posted the picture of my setup, but carbon dioxide injection is fully not necessary for the VAST majority of tanks, because it is specifically not there to help the fish at all - it’s for plants.

The fact of the matter is that it’s super hard to get those beautiful, lush planted tanks like this:

 ...without supplementing carbon dioxide. The same rules apply for aquarium plants as terrestrial plants: they covert light, water and carbon dioxide into chemical energy through photosynthesis, and then use that chemical energy and nutrients to fuel their growth, creating oxygen as a byproduct. The tricky thing is that there just isn’t a ton of carbon dioxide available underwater. Obviously, plants manage to grow underwater all the time, since some co2 will diffuse through the water when the surface is agitated (like if there’s a current, or waves, or a waterfall etc), and as long as there’s adequate sunlight and nutrients, that can be enough for plants to grow. In fact, there are plenty of aquarium plants that do just fine without co2 supplementation, like java ferns or most mosses. You can basically just chuck them in the tank and forget about them. They’ll take care of themselves.

The reason that java ferns and mosses don’t need supplemental co2 is that they have evolved to be able to grow - slowly - in places where there isn’t a lot of sunlight or carbon dioxide that reaches them. However, other plants (like dwarf hairgrass or dwarf baby tears) evolved in conditions that permitted them to grow -quickly - only with a lot of light and a great deal of available carbon dioxide. I mention hairgrass and dwarf baby tears because they’re some of the most popular plants in the aquarium hobby due to their ability to form dense carpets, which are pretty:

(dwarf hairgrass)

(dwarf baby tears)

These plants are also really popular because they’re small and resemble common terrestrial plants, which allows people to create visual illusions that make their tanks seem much bigger and more like terrestrial landscapes, like this one made by John Pini:

(notice the co2 system hanging on the side, which is almost certainly not the actual setup that he uses on this tank - Fluval sponsored the aquascaping contest he won with this). It looks like this tank has pheonix moss, maybe one of the liverwort mosses??, monte carlo (the small leafed plants), and some type of mini bucephalandra (the slightly larger leafed plants), which will actually all grow... okay? without supplemented co2, but not with the density that’s captured here. For reference, here’s the same piece of monte carlo that’s been kicking around in my low tech (i.e. no co2) shrimp tank for months (in front of the Plagiomnium affine my snails keep digging up):

and here is what happened to the single piece of leftover Monte Carlo that I stuck in Darkmantle’s high tech (co2 injected) tank at the same time, if you can make it out under all that hairgrass: 

So explosive plant growth is really the big benefit in injecting co2 in a planted aquarium, with a major side-benefit of algae control. When algae shows up in your tank, it’s because there is either too much light or too many nutrients (generally this is biological waste from livestock) in the tank for your plants to be able to use. If the plants aren’t using that excess growing energy up because they’re limited by the amount of carbon dioxide in the water, algae, which has much lower requirements for co2 than complex multicellular structures like plants, will happily take advantage of the excess light and nutrients. But if your balance of light, co2, and nutrients are correct, algae can’t get a foothold because your plants will be taking all that available energy first.  

For people who want to try out running a high tech tank, there’s a variety of  ways to do it. On a very basic level, all you need is 1) a source of carbon dioxide, and 2, a way to get it into the water. At the very lowest price point, there’s DIY systems like this one that rely on chemical interactions (usually citric acid and baking soda or sometimes yeast) to generate CO2, which is then forced through airline tubing into a diffuser (usually a ceramic disk that breaks up big bubbles of co2 into lots of little bubbles) inside the tank.  There’s a few problems with this system: the chemical reactions are really hard to keep going at a stable level that doesn’t result in huge spikes in the amount of co2 being emitted, or, alternatively, the pressure building up in the bottles won’t be enough to actually go through the airline. 

Because DIY co2 is finicky (and cleaning can be a pain in the ass) a lot of people, including me, like using pressurized co2 systems. The problem is that there’s not a ton of commercial products that are really adequate for the job that don’t cost a ridiculous amount. While you can certainly drop $600 on a professional system, most people, for obvious reasons, don’t want to do that. Instead, they might try out a system like the little kit Fluval sells, which I mentioned almost certainly was not used in creating that award winning aquascape: 

Why do I feel so confident that it wasn’t used? Well, because it kind of sucks. See, an important thing that I didn’t mention is that there is absolutely such a thing as too much co2 in a tank with any animals in it. Animals, you know, need oxygen. Co2 is their output product. Put too much co2 in a tank, and it’ll be exactly the same result as if there is too much co2 and not enough oxygen in a sealed environment that you’re in: death promptly ensues. So when we add co2 to an aquarium, we want to do so in a very measured way that permits the plants to get enough without impacting our livestock at all. There’s a bunch of different things you can use to make sure you’re doing that right, like drop checkers, which contain a chemical that changes color based on the amount of co2 in the water, or bubble counters, which allow you to visually monitor how much of an invisible gas is going into the tank, but the most important thing to stress here is that the amount of co2 that is safe to use when the plants are actively photosynthesizing is NOT the same amount that is safe to have in the tank when the lights are off. Here, the knob on that little kit depicted above is the ONLY way to turn the co2 on or off, or to vary how much is going into the tank, and frankly, that’s a terrible system. The rate of release is not steady, so you have to constantly fiddle with it, and of course you need to remember to manually turn the damn thing on and off every day, which is a pain in the ass. Also, that co2 canister is TINY and it’s not refillable, so you’ll spend hundreds in replacement cartridges before you know it. 

The 600 dollar professional kits I’ve mentioned have built in ways to counter those issues, but like I said, nobody wants to drop 600 bucks. The good thing is that you can cobble something together that does the same exact thing as a professional system for a fraction of the cost. All you need is 1. a regulator with a solenoid; and 2. a refillable paintball co2 tank. The regulator is the most important piece of equipment - it’s what allows you to adjust the amount of co2 that goes into the system, and it needs to be reliable. Luckily, there are some GREAT regulators on Amazon in the 60-70 dollar range that are incredibly reliable and come with a solenoid - that’s a magnetic valve that is ONLY open when it’s plugged in. The upshot is that if you use a timer plug or a smart plug, you can just automate when your co2 runs so that it’s only going at the same time as your lights. Then... just go to a sporting goods store, get your paintball tank filled, screw the regulator on, run some tubing into a cheap ceramic diffuser in your tank, and boom, you’ve saved 500 bucks for an extremely effective and easy to use kit that gives you professional results. 

Or... you can just not be like me, save yourself the time, money, and energy, and JUST GROW FUCKING JAVA FERNS INSTEAD, TST, YOU PRETENTIOUS ASSHOLE. 

[tbctbloggers]

ICT Thoughts

The latest session we’ve had for ICT was a super interesting one. Not just in the sense I actually paid attention but also in that almost everything we covered seemed so familiar to me. 

The concepts that we looked at were things I’d never actually heard of before, But when their details were explained I was shocked to discover these were essentially paraphrased versions of principles I’d learned in high school and during my gap year as methods for success.

The 5 Principles of Effectual Logic especially caught my attention. Through my time playing video games at a professional level I quickly learned the “Lemonade” principle as being active, vigilant and adaptable were the key improvements I needed to make to reach the top level.

I’m essentially just gonna write a huge catch-up on some points in my life that are pretty heavily linked with the principles of effectual logic just to nail these points in my head. If anyone reads this monster I hope you get something out of it.

In my last couple years of high school I went through the IB DP, which is one of the toughest school systems in the world. They just throw too much at you for a person who is highly unorganized like me to deal with. As a result I inevitably got overwhelmed and started to sink into a pretty heavy depression. While that sucked and I didn’t get much done I wasn’t just sliding right down the spiral of depression going nowhere. While feeling like crap all the time I was thinking of methods to not feel overwhelmed and push myself to start getting things done. Eventually after a couple months of being an unproductive sap something clicked and I’d essentially taken on the “Pilot in the Plane” principle of focusing on what’s under my control and taking actions based on that. As a result I not only clawed my way out of my depression I also went on to pass the IB with a result higher than the predictions made the year prior during my slump. 

During the essentially forced gap year between my graduation in May and joining this course a couple months ago I figured I’d spend most of my time learning methods and approaches to success as an adult. I figured that while high school got me a few good skills that I’ll be able to take advantage of (like writing this stuff) I still had a huge amount I’d yet to learn that would be vital for my growth and success as an adult. I began by branching off things I’ve already enjoyed such as Psychology and video games. Though as useful as many of the things I’d learned from these areas have been I needed to go somewhere completely unexplored to learn some new lessons and just decided look at a comedy group I’d never really learned much about before.

I’m beating around the bush here but I purchased a subscription to the gumroad (essentially a patreon) of Sam Hyde. An American Comedian and co-founder of the comedy group Million Dollar Extreme. Sam’s a very controversial figure to say the least and I wouldn’t recommend finding out about him in any other way than his incredible anti-futurist mockery TEDx Talk where he managed to con his way into a legitimate TEDx Talk event and spouted complete nonsense and buzzwords for 19 minutes while holding in laughter. Sam Hyde and MDE went on to produce a TV show on Adult Swim which ran for 1 incredibly successful season before being “cancelled” over stupid political allegations.

During this time and for a very long while after Sam was producing videos in a series on his youtube channel called “HydeWars” where he told stories and shared lessons he’d learned over the years that he thought were worth hearing. I subscribed to the gumroad after seeing edited clips from these episodes on youtube where the gumroad boasted having unedited full hour long videos of the “wisdom” he was sharing. 

During my MIQ here in NZ I went through all of the hydewars episodes and essentially studied them to pick out the nuggets of info that I could apply to myself and my approach to things. One of the most important messages that he gave was EXACTLY the Crazy-Quit Principle of effectual logic. Find and connect with people who you KNOW can be trusted, work hard and feel nice to be around.

I’ve been putting that principle to work quite a bit so far making a very clear partnership with Jordan. He’s someone who’s very clearly flawed, but makes up for it by being hard working, reliable and fun to be around. Another lesson I learned from Sam’s videos is that if you find someone who fills a gap that you suck at and work with them, you should fill a gap that they refuse to. I’ve been doing that by focusing on the communication side of things with Jordan, along with figuring out logistics, playing the devils advocate and more general management work where necessary. So far it’s been working out pretty well and I hope that as we develop further the balance of work begins to even out more as my value in the group defines itself a little clearer than it is now. 

The main problem I see I’ve been running into is that while I’m very good at using the tools I’m familiar with I tend to disregard them if I’m told to set a goal of work that needs to be done. When I’m given a problem and some tools I become extremely crafty and resourceful, but when I’m given a problem AND told to come up with a solution I disregard the “Bird in Hand” principle and start going for pure abductive thinking which results in poorly executed creative work. 

One positive side of this is that Jordan from my observation adopts the “Bird in Hand” principle and Max my other Studio group member is very concerned with the “Affordable Loss” principle, so with our powers combined we do a pretty damn good job at solving problems and working creatively. Although we’re still bound to crumble to pieces during our work we’re very adept at putting things back together, and not necessarily the way they were before, but instead a way that works better for what we want to do.

I apologize Ricardo for not including any questions, but I’m still pretty happy with how this turned out. Also if dates save on posts just ignore this one, just a bit of the old late night jolt of inspiration.

[inugirl]

I’ve been working on this since forever. Taking my much needed time since I don’t write as often as I’d like to. But I have had the fist chapter done for a while. I’d just like to get ahead and work on the other ones. Anyways, I thought I’d post it here for White Day since it’s a good opportunity to. @inuyasha-valentines

Fanfiction: Inuyasha

Rating: M (for language, future violence and drugs)

I’m not exactly sure what to call it yet, I’m thinking

Mistaken Identity

Kagome gets mistaken by the mysterious half-demon, Inuyasha, as the woman he was supposed to chauffeur to the big boss’s restaurant to discuss certain business. The stubborn dog ends up making matters only worse for himself, and Kagome.

~~~•~~~•~~~•~~~•~~~

She would have thought that her life couldn’t get any more strange. Not to say that it was strange to begin with. She was just an average Japanese college student trying to get her degree. She wanted to make a name for herself as a reliable pediatrician. She wasn’t currently dating and worked part time at a coffee shop to not rely on her mother as much. That’s all. Nothing made her different than others so for the life of her she had no idea how she ended up in this mess. After all, she only wanted to go to the library to return a book.

“Look, I don’t have time for this.” Kagome, a first year in university expressed. “I just need to return these books in that slot over there.” She pointed to the wall of the library the stranger was leaning on, a return slot for books after hours. She wasn’t sure what to think. Was he some pervert? A part of the Yakuza? She quickly glanced down at her attire, worried that it might have sent some unwanted attention. A simple halter blue dress that ended just above her knees, brown flats and her small yellow side purse. Her ink black hair was down and wavy and she wore little make up. All Kagome could do was wonder how her clothing was asking for trouble. She looked back at him, defiance in her eyes. ‘I will not let him have his way.’

“Look, you’re taking this cosplay thing to a whole different level if you start harassing people just for fun. This isn’t funny.” Kagome spoke loudly to him and prayed she sounded as serious and intimidating as she thought she did.

Although the mysterious man before her was leaning against a wall, he was obviously tall. His strange yet attractive long white hair complemented his slightly tanned tone against the black and white suit he was wearing; his muscular build noticeable. His eyes were a hypnotizing amber gold and ears that resembled that of a dogs were perched atop his head. Kagome was indeed in fear for her safety, but the attractiveness this man gave, she had an odd fantasy of following him.

With a malicious fanged grin plastering his face, he stayed in his spot, leaned against the very wall she was pointing at.

“Look here girl, I was sent to get you okay? It’s not my fault if you didn’t get the memo.” His clawed hands made their way to the air, in a sort of ‘I don’t care’ maneuver.

Kagome could only glare at the man before her. Her blue-gray eyes trying to pierce through this odd persona.

‘I swear, this is like some plot of a dumb show or something. It’s not like everyday a handsome man with animalistic qualities bumps into you…the eyes could easily be contacts...some really well made contacts, and his hair could be professionally dyed or a wig...but those ears on top of his head, they just flicked like a dog’s...how did he do that…’

Realizing that she’d been silent for a little too long she squared her shoulders and lifted her head to keep her aggressive front.

“And just who sent you?”

The odd man simply rolled his eyes and pushed himself off of the wall.

“Don’t be stupid. Come on, we don’t have time for this.” He walked towards Kagome, reaching for her arm. “You of all people should know he isn’t a patient man.”

“Stop! Don’t touch me! Get away!” She flinched back walking backwards as fast as she could without tripping, keeping her eyes trained on the man. He looked surprised and then angry.

“Look. We don’t have time for this shit. Naraku sent me to get you and now you’re backing down on a meeting you called for?” He looked very angry indeed. His thick black eyebrows, which beautifully contrasted his hair, furrowed deeply, the grin he had a while ago replaced with a scowl.

“Naraku…who? I don’t know a Naraku! I didn’t call for a meeting! I’m just a college student! Just let me be that!” Kagome screamed at him. She looked around frantically, trying to find anyone to help her. It was dark out, but only nearing nine thirty at night. The summer months would be arriving soon. How could there be no people nearby? Not even a security guard!

‘I don’t need some ridiculous cartoon adventure! My life is stressful enough as it is! I’m already late turning in this book!’ Kagome quickly looked to the strange yet impossibly gorgeous man before her, then down to her book in her hand. ‘Crap! This is exactly like a plot to a kid’s show!’

“This is a prank show, isn’t it? I’m being pranked in some outrageous prank show. It has to be, right?” Kagome’s chest heaved deeply with every word. She dropped her books, now forgotten she placed her free hands to her chest. She was having a hard time breathing. Her chest was starting to hurt and with every breath she took, she felt like she was missing it somehow.

Falling to her knees Kagome did little to get away from the fastly approaching stranger. He kneeled in front of her, his anger now gone. He looked confused and worried, his ears going flat against his head. He reached out again for her, only slower. Kagome tried to scramble away from him, her hand still to her chest while the other aided her rear against the ground.

“No. Please.” Kagome heaved, sweat was covering her flushed face and her blue-gray eyes holding unfallen tears. She closed her eyes to focus on her breathing, the pooled tears finally falling. ‘One, two, three. One, two, three.’ Her eyes still closed, Kagome felt the man grab her arms. His hands were rough, but his touch wasn’t. His cool hands were welcoming against her ever growing hot skin.

“Hey come on, what’s going on? What’s happening?” He was confused, she was yelling at him like she didn’t know what was going on. Did he really have the wrong girl? He continued to watch her struggle for air. He adjusted himself to her. Kneeling behind her to keep her sitting up and held her shoulders.

The man lowly uttered a growl of annoyance. Noticing her purse he reached into it, grabbing out her wallet and taking out her identification card.

There it was, Kagome Higurashi, 24 years old.

“Fuck. I do have the wrong girl.” He put the ID card down and held her again, examining her closer than he was able to before. She continued to exhale heavy and long breaths and her skin felt hot to his touch. Looking down he noticed her staring up at him. Her eyes were dark, she was looking through her thick lashes and he was staring back.

“I’m,” her voice horsley low, “I’m so sore.” Kagome tried to hug her arms around herself but failed. “I’m so tired.” She closed her eyes and let her exhaustion take over, her body limp in his grasp and her breathing evening out.

“Oh fuck me. I really screwed up.” Growling to himself, the handsome stranger looked back at her ID card for her address. Rolling his eyes he put her items back in her purse and closed it. Gently, he picked her up in his arms. Her own arms falling limp to her exposed side while the other half was warmly close against him. Looking around him to make sure he had all of her things he noticed her fallen book.

‘She said she wanted to return it to the library.’ He looked back to the wall he was leaning on only a few meters away. ‘Well, it’s the least I could do I guess.’

Carefully, he placed her back on the floor and picked up her book to return it. He put the book through the return slot and laid his head against the cold brick wall. He let out an annoyed sighed.

“How did I fuck up this badly?” He eyed the unconscious girl on the ground. Now understanding that she wasn’t the girl he was looking for she looked so vulnerable on the ground. ‘And that’s my fault. I freaked her out so much I gave her a damn panic attack.’ The man winced to himself and made his way to Kagome. Picking her off the ground again he lifted her in his arms with ease and began walking the way she came from.

‘I’m gonna fucking hear it now too. ‘Stupid Inuyasha, you had one job! Good for nothing half-breed!’ ’ Inuyasha mentally mimicked his higher ups already knowing what was going to be said when he came back from his failed mission.

“I can’t let them know about her though, they may try to kill her if they know she saw me outside of my disguise.” He suddenly stopped and looked around him. Still not sensing or smelling anyone, a small bundle of nerves grew deep in his belly.

“Shit. It would look very suspicious if I just walk around with her like this. I don’t need anymore trouble.” He looked around and walked to the closest building, a parking structure. With grace and precision he jumped high into the air landing atop of the structure and began running from rooftop to rooftop. Already very familiar and acquainted with the city, he knew where to go from the address on her identification card.

After scaling each necessary building with hardly any required effort, Inuyasha landed on the rooftop of her apartment. He looked down to the girl in his arms. She hadn’t stirred once during the run and that worried him. He uttered a low growl as he made his way to the roofs edge and looked down. The apartment complex wasn’t all that extravagant, a very typical building with neighbors in between her apartment. Cautious to not be seen by any neighbors, Inuyasha placed Kagome gently on the roof of her building and went into her small purse and easily found her house keys. He went down to her door first to unlock it and put the keys in his pocket before carrying her down with him. Upon entering her living space Inuyasha couldn’t help but to be engulfed by her smell. It was everywhere.

The smell was difficult to describe in one word, but he knew it would engrave itself into his brain. The intoxicating smell was emanating from every corner of the room and as if his mind allowed him to, he suddenly remembered the situation he was in. He quickly closed the front door and made his way past the entry and into her living space. Looking around to his left a small kitchen and to his right a door. He opened it expecting her bedroom yet was greeted with a suffocating small bathroom. Grunting he closed the door back and made his way to the living room, the girl still in tow in his arms.

“Is this where she lives?” He looked around the room. A small t.v. on a short bookshelf and a rolled futon were tucked nicely in a corner. A rectangular small coffee table which he could only guess doubled as her dining table was off center below her one large window. And the only average size furnishings he could see was a tall dresser and a study desk next to it. Other than her desk decorated with open books, a cup of writing utensils and a lamp, the rest of her home was relatively clean.

He placed her gently on the floor and walked towards her futon and began rolling it out.

“Ya know, this place is tiny as hell. How do you even live like this?” Inuyasha wasn’t expecting an answer and was happy to not surprisingly hear one back. He picked her up and placed her on her futon, her weight pushing against the pillows and mat made her captivating sent valley up into his nose. He grunted, he wasn’t sure why she smelled so amazing to him, but it was really starting to get on his nerves. Wanting to leave even faster he quickly took off her shoes and grabbed her purse. He placed her purse on her desk chair, not really knowing where it would go and placed her shoes at the door entryway. Making sure to lock the lock on the doorknob, he left her, hoping she’d believe their encounter to be only a dream.

[awastelandheart]

Sebastian’s personality analyzed through his theory-crafted natal chart: The perspective of a professional astrologer.

PART ONE: SUN SIGN.

i apologize in advance to any capricorns i unintentionally read to filth in this post.

          i think out of all the bachelors   &   bachelorettes, Sebastian has the oddest, most abrasive post-marriage dialogue. i’ve heard plenty of people over the years complain about how awkward being married to him is   &   i, myself, tend to not marry him when i play since locking him in pelican town like that when he so clearly wants to leave feels bad. even before marriage as well, he has a lot of almost cringey   &   certainly concerning dialogue. Sebastian’s not a man that’s made for marriage or long term relationships i think, at least not in his early to mid 20s which is how old i believe he is in canon. unlike the rest of the bachelors   &   bachelorettes, his character arc   &   development don’t do much for melding him into someone worth being with. even Shane who is troubled in a much more obvious way than Sebastian has more moments of reflection that convince the player that he’s a good person despite his flaws. Sebastian may seem to be gentle in his internal struggle, it’s easy to believe that, at most, he’s rude   &   depressed, but i think there’s a lot more to unpack here that suggests he’s violent, angry to an awful degree,   &   possibly the worst marriage candidate, if not just the worst townie out of the whole cast.

          to start off with, i believe Sebastian’s sun sign is Capricorn. my reasoning for this is a blend between a post on reddit i found that used a simple algorithm to convert the in game dates to real dates. taking into account the slightly flawed method that gives each date 2-3 days worth of wiggle room,   “ january 17th ”   implies he’s on the Capricorn side of january. to be honest, when i was first thinking about what sun sign i wanted Sebastian to have, i was leaning towards Aquarius since he has several lines about escaping the town   &   wanting his freedom   ( both being very Aquarius-like qualities ),   however i think the case for Capricorn is much easier to make. to start off, i’ll give a run down of the most defining Capricorn characteristics, then i’ll move onto showing in-game examples of how Sebastian demonstrates these traits   ( while leaving room for his other natal positions that i’ll extrapolate on in more posts to come ).

          Capricorn is an earth sign, reveling in stability with a handful of almost toxic traits to display if that stability isn’t achieved. ruled by saturn, or kronos if you wanna get greek, Capricorns are at a constant war with themselves between the general human experience   &   cutting out as much superfluous expression   &   feeling as possible. the story of kronos is very reflective of the Capricorn struggle:   it’s the tale of a man   ( god, but that’s not important )   whose wife is predicted to bear a child who will surpass him   &   take his legacy. kronos, in his anxiety to prevent this change, begins eating each of his wife’s children as they’re born until one day, his wife replaces one of the newborns with a rock so that it will survive kronos’ consumption. of course this leads to the child growing up   &   indeed surpassing kronos just as the prophecy foretold. the lesson to be learned from kronos is one of restriction   &   the inevitability of time.

          between their earthly reliability   &   love of practicality, Capricorns are viewed as the traditional fathers of the zodiac sphere. they guard their values of yesteryear close to their chest. anything too different is cast far away from themselves or, rather, consumed until all traces are disposed of. thankfully not as stubborn as poor Taurus   ( another earth sign ),   Capricorns have a touch of adaptability in all their logic. their modality is cardinal, implying they take charge of situations. they are the leaders next to Cancer, Libra,   &   Aries:   any good leader knows when to give up their morals for the betterment of their charge. to boot, Capricorn is represented by the mythological creature, the sea-goat   ( a creature created by dear old kronos, himself, consisting of the torso of a goat   &   the tail of a fish );   the goat half delivering on that steady earthly nature of an unrelenting climb to the top of a mountain called life, yet the inclusion of the ocean in this aesthetic implying an amount of emotion only water signs can relate to.

          in the typical male-dominated, fatherly way, however, emotional expression does not exist for Capricorns, resulting in this implied depth to lurk well below a Capriorn’s surface. they are deeply independent in a way that leads to intense loneliness. they must do everything for themselves, another thing lovely kronos has taught us here. why look for a different solution to this problem when i so clearly have found one for myself, the ruler of saturn proclaims. a Capricorn’s independence is almost panic charged in this way. they so dearly want to be seen as capable that they will shred their own livelihood as a price. they are masters at self control for it, each having taught themselves the art of stoicism from a young age. Capricorns are at best, friendly in a superficial way. knowing their loneliness is created by their own hands but never knowing how to move passed their own cold   &   distant heart to enact any change necessary to improve their relationships.

          something that is often associated with Capricorns   &   the other earth signs is the act of earning money. while Taurus enjoys earning money to support their lavish, venus-ruled lifestyle   &   Virgo sees money as something to worry over thus resulting in them hoarding it, Capricorns crave for their income to be stable   &   plentiful in order to provide for their loved ones, or for the more lonely Capricorns, to provide for themselves.

          saturn is the first planet to take a substantial amount of time to complete its cycle through all the signs. compared to earth, which takes one year to complete its solar rotation   &   jupiter which takes 12, saturn takes upwards of 30 years. we astrologers take that as symbolical for how Capricorns get significantly better with age, as well as their   “ slow   &   steady wins the race ”   attitude. Capricorn is a sign of wisdom but only at the hand of experience. young Capricorns frequently find themselves discontented with their environment   &   lifestyle, craving a stability that cannot exist without first having established themselves in the world. every seven years it’s said, a Capricorn reaches a new level of understanding   &   maturity, as it is about every seven years that saturn completes 1/4th of its solar cycle.

          Capricorns, like Scorpios, love their privacy. regarded as one of the more shady signs of the zodiac, a Capricorn is the type of person to have everyone believing they know everything there is to know about them while simultaneously only ever revealing surface level knowledge about themselves. Capricorns love having friends   &   spending time with their loved ones, however they lack a sense of trust that would allow them to form deeper connections. while a Capricorn does experience their emotions as thoroughly as the rest of the zodiac, they have an equally intense insecurity about expressing them. a Capricorn lives their life wanting to be depended on or at least wanting to provide for those that do depend on them. emotions are seen as a weakness that cannot be spared.

          with the basic personality of a Capricorn outlined, i’ll now go through some choice quotes that demonstrate these traits   &   then talk about a few parts of his heart events that do the same.

“ if i just disappeared would it really matter ? ” “ i was thinking... people are like stones skipping over the water. Eventually we're going to sink. ” “ what am I going to do today ?   probably nothing.”

          when the player first meets Sebastian, he is overtly depressed   &   never goes out of his way to hide it. there is a solemn dark cloud filled with rain, ready to burst constantly following him   &   it’s difficult to ignore. this seriousness is very characteristic of many signs, Capricorn being one of them as it is ruled by Saturn, an outer planet with a very melancholic tone.

“ hey, don't let me stop you from getting your work done. if you aren't busy i don't mind if you stick around. ”

          this quote demonstrates the productive mindset of a Capricorn. compared to all the other bachelors, Sebastian is the only one to ever really consider the player’s work schedule.

“ i was so close to screaming at mom for throwing away my old comic collection   ...  but something stopped me. hmm   ...   with age comes wisdom. ” “ the older i get, the less i'm drawn to the city. ” “ sometimes i feel so angry  ...  but when you show up i always start to calm down. maybe i'll mellow out with age. ”

          while these quotes are also depicting other personality traits, for now i want to emphasize Sebastian’s constant referencing to the passage of time. time is always on a Capricorn’s mind, even the less self aware ones always feel the effects of its passage harsher than other signs. after dating   &   at points in marriage, which is when these quotes are from, Sebastian begins to view time as something more positive   &   optimistic. he recognizes that he has anger issues, at the very least,   &   hopes they’ll get better as time goes on. it’s quite the feat to make a Capricorn see growing older as something positive instead of something anxiety inducing, so from this alone we can really tell that Sebastian is absolutely in love with the player, without a doubt.

“ i couldn't sleep last night so I went for a night ride on the motorcycle. i need to stay independent, even though we're married. that's just how i am. i still love you, though. ” “ hey   ...   want some coffee ?   i needed some   ...   woke up early from a nightmare   &   i just couldn't fall back asleep. ” “ hey. i couldn't sleep last night so i took a walk to the caves. ” “ i'm going to take a walk today. i need some time to myself. i'll see you in the evening. ”

          Capricorns tend to be almost predisposed to sleep issues due to their immense amount of anxiety that comes with the disconnect between productivity   &   incapability, or craving emotional connection   &   viewing emotions as unnecessary. Capricorns are also fiercely independent, so independent that it’s no surprise Sebastian’s the kind of person to sneak out of bed   &   go off alone when feeling anxious instead of waking his partner up for comfort.

“ i don't want to get soft now that i'm a married guy. maybe i should start eating more hot pepper   &   working out ?   just an idea   ... ”

          while i’d also be willing to chalk this expression up to Sebastian being anxious about not passing as masc, i’m also willing to attribute this to a Capricorn being afraid of time passing   &   “ missing out ”   on life. growing soft can be a fear of a sign so dedicated to seeming tough   &   dependable.

“ i don't really feel like doing work today. maybe i'll see what's on tv. ” “ i did some work on the laptop today. ” “ i'm debating whether i should work or just read comics all day. ” “ you know, i should be doing something productive right now. i just lose focus too fast   ...   maybe i should drink more coffee ? ”

          Sebastian references his work so frequently, in typical Capricorn fashion because the urge to justify one’s pleasures by mentioning the fact that they’re also being productive is something ever-present. they are a very guilty breed;   on top of their other burdens, they feel especially bad for moments of relaxation or times when they should be doing something, but cannot bring themselves to.

“ you’re probably making a lot of money on your farm, huh ?   i guess i should get a job soon   … ” “ we should raise more slimes. in big quantities they can be really profitable. ” “ i did some work on the laptop today. i was actually brainstorming some ideas for a game i want to make. with your farming income, i can afford to do what i want with my life. it’s pretty amazing. thank you. ” “ hey. look at me. never forget that i love you   ...   you’re everything to me. now go make us some money. ” “ are we doing okay on money ?   i don’t want to have to sell my laptop   ... ” “ *sigh*   ...    if gas wasn’t so expensive i’d ride my motorcycle to the city today. so what do you do when you aren’t working ? ”

          Sebastian talks SO much about money   &   to me, it’s really hard to imagine concernedape didn’t intentionally make him a Capricorn with this much dialogue about income when no other bachelor or bachelorette has any mention of the topic   ( except for harvey who mentions he’s afraid he’s not bringing in enough money from the lack of people in town ).   the biggest one that jumps out at me to really signal a significant change in his personality after marriage is when he mentions having the freedom that comes with a steady income, a freedom that now allows him to do what he really wants which is, apparently, to make a video game. another one that jumps out at me here is his immediate association with feeling like he should get a job after assuming the player is making a lot of money. since income is such an important subject for Capricorns, it’s easy to imagine Sebastian feels inferior in comparison to the player since he’s   “ just ”   a freelancer.

“ i often felt unappreciated at home   ...   but here i feel like i really belong. ”

          this quote kind of hits Capricorn’s need to be appreciated   &   useful directly on the head   &   is a good transition for me to talk about the fact that Sebastian never progressed very far in his career while living at home with his family because he felt unappreciated. compared to how he almost immediately has a dialogue line after marriage where he tells the player he’s been inspired to make a video game, it’s easy to see the almost instant maturity Sebastian obtained just from moving out;   something he had assumed was in the far off future, implied by his heart scenes.

now let’s break down Sebastian’s heart events.

          his first heart even opens with him busy working, already a very Capricorn setting honestly, as i’ve said a few times now since Capricorns are prone to productivity. Robin enters after a moment   &   informs Sebastian that Abigail is looking for him, to which Sebastian responds to ask if his mother had informed Abigail that he’s working. Robin says that while she had, Abigail still intends on visiting Sebastian at some point today. Sebastian’s next piece of dialogue is very important.

“ *sigh* no one takes my job seriously. ”

          this is an incredibly Capricorn thing to say, both because Capricorns always feel the need to be taken seriously   &   also due to their signature insecurity about income.

          the scene continues so that the player can ask Sebastian what his career goals are. he explicitly says:   “ well, i’m trying to save up so i can move out of here. probably to the city or something, ”   which by itself is obviously very Capricorn, both nailing their need for income, their constant validation that they deserve what they want,   &   their desire for independence, however his dialogue continues for another textbox that contains the most Capricorn lines i’ve ever heard.

“ you know, if i went to college i’d probably be making six figures right now … ”   

          Sebastian is so very   &   obviously obsessed with money, it’s crazy to think he’s any other sign but Capricorn. this portion of the heart scene ends with him saying, 

“ but i just don’t want to be a part of that corporate rat race, you know ? ”   

          this dialogue i’m willing to attribute to another one of his signs at a later date in another post, but in my experience, i’ve known several Capricorn suns that feel the same:   that while they strive for a stable income, they hate participating in capitalistic culture.

          this first heart scene ends with Sebastian dismissing the player, saying he   “ has to get this module finished by tomorrow, ”   indicating he has a very set schedule when it comes to his work. organization being yet another characteristic trait of Capricorn.

          Sebastian’s second heart scene opens with the player catching him working on his bike. after a moment of introspection, Sebastian starts talking, again, about how when he saves enough money, he’s going to get out of the valley, just him   &   his bike. this scene doesn’t have anything specifically Capricorn about it   &   i plan on revisiting it when i talk about his other placements.

          likewise, Sebastian’s third   &   fourth heart scenes don’t have anything outrageously Capricorn in them   --   in fact neither scene tells us very much about Sebastian in particular aside from pointing out that he likes tabletop games   ( which obviously isn’t exclusively Capricorn by any means, but i’ve known so, so many Capricorn suns that have been hardcore into dnd over the years   ...  )   &   has social anxiety. i’ll most likely dip into his fourth heart scene a little more when i talk about his other placements, though.

          Sebastian’s fifth   (   &   final before marriage )   heart scene is, of course, important,   &   probably the most memorable for anyone who’s played Sebastian’s route, but it honestly doesn’t tell us much about his core personality. what it does tell us is how he acts   &   feels when he’s in love, so i’ll definitely come back to this scene when i talk about his venus position.

          &   that’s on his heart scenes !

          so, in summary, i believe Sebastian has a Capricorn sun because he shares many qualities with how astrologers perceive the position. of course this is all just my personal interpretation, but i hope this was an interesting read   &   shed some light on the kind of person Sebastian is !

[asynca]

(1/4)Hi auntie! I have a dilemma and I'd like your opinion as a professional and as someone who is also in therapy. I started seeing my therapist 2 years ago, and after a good year of being at rock fucking bottom I started seeing incredible results. Nowadays I'm functional for the first time in my life, I can finally be a good friend and a reliable person and I've taken hard but necessary decisions regarding my family. All that to say that therapy has been obviously good to me.

(2/4)However I’ve recently been feeling not so good about it. I’ve recently spaced out the sessions (which is great!) But I’ve started feeling bad about something and i dont know if it’s due to some projection or if it’s legit. My therapist is new to the job (which worked for me since I like his approach and ive had traumatizing experience with older mental health professionals). I’ve also had to educate him on queer issues which I dont mind that much since I have other support systems for that.

(¾)But because of that and the fact that I think I was one of his first patients, I feel like our dynamic changed recently and I’m not comfortable with it. Last time I saw him he talked about his own issues and although it was to paint a parallel with something I was talking about, I immediately felt queasy. Thing is I’ve been told by a lot of people that therapists would manipulate me and even though most days now I can tell its bs, this one shift in dynamic last time really shook me.

(4/4)Idk how to tell him I was uncomfortable, and also I have the suspicion he doesnt have a therapist himself (and something recent happened in his life) This is messy but I’ve had a hard time figuring out why i feel so bad and i think it’s that I’m afraid of being taken advantage of, which sounds far stretched but I come from a traumatized home with paranoid parents so yeah. Idk what level of familiarity is acceptable in this situation and what’s bad practice. Do you have any advice?

Okay I can tell you exactly what is happening here.

As a counsellor, it’s important to set boundaries with clients. I want my clients to see me as a professional, not really as a whole person. I am a resource to them and it’s not important for them to know very much about me beyond how I work and what I can do for them. I am careful not to be too familiar or casually friendly with clients. I am careful not to see them outside work. I am careful not to discuss my private life or my own issues except EXTREMELY sparingly where I think an example may be useful (and even then, I typically phrase my own discoveries as ‘something other people have found useful is …’). I am also careful to tell my clients what I can and can’t do for them, and police those limits. If you like a client, or if a client is particularly needy (which is not the case for you, but as an example), it’s extremely tempting to step over those boundary lines you set and either a) do things that are not within your role for a client, or b) get too friendly with them and step down from from being a professional service provider into a more friendship-peer role. 

That’s what’s happening here. You’re uncomfortable because you still see this person as your 100% professional therapist, but you can feel a boundary is being eroded because this person is beginning to either see you as a friend or see you as something other than a client. 

It seems as if they are overwhelmed by their own issues and it’s beginning to bleed into their work, too, which definitely necessitates some therapy themselves. I’d be extremely surprised if this personal doesn’t have their own counsellor/therapist, as for most registration bodies here you’re required to also have your own therapist to practice. This probably means they aren’t getting what they need from their own therapy or they’re overwhelmed by something in their own life and haven’t managed to realise that and contain it yet. 

As for you as a client, it is perfectly natural for you to feel uncomfortable when your therapist crosses a professional line! This is also very common for new therapists to make this mistake! I’m sorry it’s been made on you. Clients should typically never have to think about their own therapist’s personal lives or problems so it’s a pity that wall has been broken. 

It’s very unlikely your therapist is manipulating you. Your therapist just hasn’t set their own personal boundaries well. You’re only being taken advantage of in that you’re paying a therapist to also talk about their own issues - I don’t think your therapist may even be aware this is happening. 

What happens next is really up to you. This is a really tough one to address, because often if you say to someone, “I think a boundary has been eroded here,” they can get a bit defensive (although I’d like to think counsellors would be more self-reflective than this!). 

You could try, “Perhaps this is something you could discuss with your own therapist,” if they start bringing up their own issues, too. 

A sort of gentle way to continue service is to start the next session with your counsellor (if you’d like to continue with them) with, “I’d like to talk about what I need from this service, what goals I have, and how we reach them,” and remind your counsellor this is a professional session without actually saying it. You can even say, “I’ve had a think about what I need from this and I’ve written a list of techniques you use that I found really helpful, and things that I personally find less helpful,” and on the ‘less helpful’ list, you can include “too many personal examples from your own life” or something. This has the added benefit of also letting your therapist know what DOES work. 

It is possible to just change counsellors, or just openly say, “I don’t want to be too familiar with you, if that’s okay,” but again, that’s a really tough conversation to have with your counsellor. 

However, if you feel up to it, you can absolutely have an open and transparent discussion wiht them exactly like you’ve had with me. Just say it makes you uncomfortable and it doesn’t work for you. Hopefully addressing the issue won’t cause any problems in your therapeutic relationship. I’d like to think my clients would feel comfortable in openly telling me if I was getting too familiar! 

Anyway, I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this. As I mentioned, it’s very common with new therapists so please don’t feel like you contributed to it in any way except obviously by being a likeable person and easy to talk to :)