#if I hate it too much idk
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bet you guys didn't know that I have a genderbent jax design that makes out with ragatha
#the amazing digital circus#tadc#tadc ragatha#tadc jax#genderbent jax#bunnydoll#pretty much implied#jax x ragatha#these are pretty rough I can't draw im sorry#probably gonna delete this later#if I hate it too much idk#i love her tho#fem!jax
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yeah so this was insane
#i feel like too many people reduce this interaction to jason being like ‘lol same’#but idk :/#this chapter is from jason’s pov#and leading up to it he’s like ‘people keep walking on eggshells around me bc of the the michael varus stab wound’#and he hates it so when he goes on deck to help out with the storm#everyone’s like wtf except for percy#and jason states how much he appreciated percy not treating him like a sick kid#and i feel like it’s echoed in this sentiment where jason could say so many things like#‘you should never feel that way’ ‘im here if you need anything’#but he doesn’t make percy feel alone in his desire to just…. end it all#which ik for some people that doesn’t work but you’re not a character in hoo and percy is dealing with so much guilt#and he can’t tell annabeth bc she’s a main aspect of that guilt#and he doesn’t wanna guilt her more and he feels ashamed and when he describes this he feels weird for feeling it#so having jason this tough guy be like ‘yo i understand it bc i felt the same way#that’s gotta mean a lot to percy#also insane how jason who also struggles to display vulnerability#allows it in one of few times in this moment just so percy this guy he’s supposed to be jealous about#feels comforted and not alone in his guilt and shame#and also it’s just insane how jason’s wanting to kay em ess does not get talked about AT ALL#and just seeing his mom and the pressure of new rome getting to him#like this scene is insane and i’ll never shut up about it#also ignore me i’m just finishing my reread of hoo that took all summer#jason grace#percy jackson#pjo#ashla.txt
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag#writeblr#it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal#fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho)#healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy#im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage....#1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind#and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes#2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception''#3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.''#idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh#im sure there are people who have this experience normally#but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists#when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band''#edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful#once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large#but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry.#but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes#but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally.#i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes#people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism#but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet .#i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY#and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound.#but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in#i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too.#here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change#was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort)#choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL
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JANE DOE ❖ undercover r&b
The big bad daddy who cussed you out every day is gone and yet you still miss him. What are you, a bunch of daddy's boys?
#zzz#zenless zone zero#zzzero#jane#jane doe#zzzedit#m:gifs#m:*#zzz spoilers#zzzero spoilers#zenless zone zero spoilers#1.1 spoilers#incoming complaining/thoughts about the quest ->#i think i only enjoyed this quest bc i like jane lol#otherwise it just felt like an insanely long character trial#most of it was just her running around talking to herself lmao#i wish the 'reveal' that she was an undercover cop came more as a twist it was revealed soooo early#i get that youre playing her for like the entirety of it but still. do some more stuff from seth's perspective or smth idk#and honestly the whole undercover cop thing was. eh jaskldfl too much copganda esp with seth's whole 'i hate dishonesty!!!!!!!' shtick#would have preferred if she was more of a morally ambiguous independent party who happens to have aligning goals situation#its boring when you know she's on “our side” for 99% of it. absolutely 0 stakes#i do love jane's gameplay though so i didn't mind all the battle sequences jakdljaf
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Imagine if he started getting scared of bridges too
#idk man these are so half-assed but i spent way too much time for it to only rot in my gallery#and i literally have 0 energy to finish this or like add more sketches for context#aa#ace attorney#aa4#seven year gap#ace attorney fanart#I THREW THE CONTEXT IN THE TRASH BIN FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELVES UEFHHHHH#the bridge didnt snapped if you cant tell#he was just reminiscing the fall after it creaked#anyways#fml#fanart#art#ace attorney art#aa art#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#this is hurt/comfort but i threw the comfort as well#i hate this#DELETING IF IT FLOPS IM GONNAKMS#“we as a community should make him cry more” i have never nodded so hard ever in my life
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happy pride to all queer children of immigrants
patreon
#muertodraws#queer art#queer comic#lgbtq#pride#trans artist#qtpoc#trans art#transgender#transmasc#mlm#if youre a queer child of immigrants you deserve free lifelong therapy#this comic was originally going to be a “i feel like a freak” cuz im trans and people dont know what to do with me#and then it turned into like. oh god this experience is compounded by your complicted relationship to uhh well#being mexican and a child of immigrants#i was originally going to add a quote from a jose marti poem but idk i didnt want this to get too long#i think if i did that i would prolly attract the attention of latine purists and nationalists lmfaooo#i already have people who dont even believe im mexican much less a child of immigrants much less a man#the most common hate i get now is that im a confused white woman gringa who isnt latin american#besides the transphobia im just like. have you ever heard of a diaspora#anyway#hope someone enjoys this
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blub blub
their actual colors
#transformers#merformers#au#optimus prime#megatron#art#yet another instance of 'im going to doodle something silly' that turns into a fully rendered thing#i think both are territorial but op asks questions first and Acts later. whereas megs Bites first and if they survive then asks questions#so like. regular megatron but possibly angrier. if that's Even possible#and op has a shorter temper but is overall very nice and kind :3 she likes to bite megs and likes to play fight a little too rough#probably a few of those scars are bc she bit megs too hard#unrelated thought but if they hunt fish and the fish are also mechs i don't think they would eat the Metal. i think they would rip out thei#Fuel tank and drink the energon. or bite the neck and drink the energon that spills? idk#would they be able to transform into Bipeds to walk on land .. do they transform into Fish (or shark in megs' case)?#can they do both? are they triple changers? if they are do they just choose to remain underwater for practicality#and because megatron is Disgusted by the 'land' mechs? would she hate them as much as her counterparts hate organics#too many questions too little brain (personally) . i just go hehe fishy blub blub
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Yuuji really said \(@^v^@)/
#I ADORE THIS LITTLE GUY#idk i kinda dislike this but its him so i cant dislike it too much#idk idk#itadori yuuji#itadori yuji#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#screencap redraw#redraw#jjk s2#jjk season2#fanart#shibuya arc#im still fighting artblock so redraws are the most i can do#and i hate it#but whatever#hope you still like this#lol#niinnyu arts
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[ID in ALT] Steph and Damian doodle! This taps a bit into their pre-52 dynamic so that's what I was thinking design wise at first but I wanted to draw it w their more recent designs as well to stay hashtag current and topical, so you get both/a fusion, lol
#dc comics#dc#batfamily#damian wayne#stephanie brown#tims there too but he's not the focus so i won't clog his tag#for this to be completely in character Damian would have to be much more disinterested in what she's saying#or i mean ACT disinterested in what she's saying. he's very interested in violence done to tim. esp by his favorite weird big sister#THEY (tim n damian) DO NOT HATE EACH OTHER BTW. this is just the cain instinct at work. also admiration for unhinged steph#idk how much of pre-52 is in play rn visa vie steph (i know cass was still discovering her pre52 past in spirit world so...)#but for the sake of this lets say the brick meeting from detective comics og is still valid. bc i love it#steph violent eye-for-an-eye scrapper tendencies and tims insanity (HE'S STILL INTO HER AFTER THIS) on full display#i don't post a lot of dc fanart bc i find them exceedingly difficult to draw (DRAWING SUPERHEROES IS HARD WHEN UR BAD AT ANATOMY)#(ALSO THERE'S NO CONSISTENT FACIAL/HAIR/ETC DESIGN FOR ANYONE)#but i have done a lot of art and now I'm trying to make an effort to post a wee bit more#mine
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Gojo would fuck you completely boneless with you folded like he’s trying some kind of human origami technique
and then not even a full minute after completely blowing both your brains clear out your heads, while hes lowering your legs down from where your knees practically touch either side of your head,
he’d do some goofy dorky shit like grabbing the undersides of both your calves near your ankles to move them back and forth with some “doo, doo, doo,” sound effect like machine control levers. because this mf cannot be serious to save his life
(kick him)
#vae talks too much#idk 💀#he’s a dweeb and a dork and I hate him#so much#it’s late and I’m sooo tired#and I have morning classes tomorrow🥲#sillyposting#wait it’s Halloween happy Halloween!!!#gojo blurb#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jjk writing#satoru gojo headcanons#satoru gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo x y/n#gojo x reader#jjk smut#☁️🤍☁️#Hesss sooooooo annnooyyinngguh#mdni
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that ivan loves till is the most obvious thing about them
but. does ivan know that…?
the ivan that regards his own feelings as shallow, the ivan that learned how emotions are expressed only from copying others… does he even know that the love he’s felt for so long is love? probably not. and part of the reason is the one he loves himself
because the easiest example he has of love is till's feelings to mizi. till outright calls it love, and ivan watches him so much he has to be aware of this and till’s love to mizi is totally unselfish, right. he doesn’t seem to actually want much from her—just that she's still there and still "mizi"
but ivan can't be satisfied with just watching he… wants. ivan wants till’s attention, till’s affection—
surely this selfish wanting can’t be love
...no wonder he was never able to express his feelings straightforwardly when he belittles them so much but he can’t stand not having anything either, so he does… whatever he does instead to get any scraps of attention he can, from someone he's convinced doesn't care about him at all only showing affection when till can't see it, right until he knows he's going to die
but ivan's feelings for till are all he still has of himself... to think of them as shallow...
I've seen this translated as "I should've been kinder" to him (till) or to her (sua)
but really, the one he should've been kinder to was himself
#alien stage#alnst#alnst ivan#ivantill#i have a lot of thoughts on till -> mizi too but this is long enough#just attempting to rewrite my twt rambles more coherently#idk why i wrote this so dramatically tho...#'thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions' is going to haunt me to my grave#ivan's character is just a careful balance between his natural freak nature and his extreme depths of self-loathing#making him the most miserable guy ever#...really once you realize so much of what went wrong is thanks to ivan just hating himself too much to even think of them as friends. well#c...can we bring him back... don't die like this.....#(also you know. with the implications of how 'pets' are treated#wanting someone physically must feel... even more wrong
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phinktober day 11: ur fav AU
i dont rlly do AUs so i just drew them how i wish they would dress xo
(dan’s tats r carnations and snowdrops and phil’s r roses and honeysuckle. for no reason 🤗)
ALSO bonus version w makeup bc i couldn’t pick <3
#soz copied caption from twt i have been drawing for 7 hours straight i need to drink water eat something take a piss and a shower and sleep#no braincell rn#goodbye it is wine time#hope yall like this idfk what people what these days other than ship art but im not doing that so sorry no knights fucking for you#just me making them look like me bc i’m a narcissist etc#god i am way too tired to be yapping rn i have no filter whatever ABYWAY HASHTAG DANIPHIW#art2 and craft2#dnp#phanart#dan and phil#daniel howell#amazingphil#dan howell#phil lester#phinktober#punk edits irl come back to me please#i’m missing a fkn hashtag i just know it whatever i don’t CARE im TIRED i have eaten nothing but half a jar of picked today i feel so goblin#idk why i tunnelvisioned w this piece it’s not even that good or detailed LMFAO#actually the tattoos were a BITCH and also made me sad bc of my whole failed tattooing career etc#OH MY GOD WHY AM I YAPPING SO MUCH SOMEONE EUTHANISE ME#good NIGHT !!!!!!#pickles not picked btw but i’m not retyping all of that#now i’m sad bc i’m out of pickles and it’s 10pm and everything is shut:( hate my stupid gay life
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mira !!! :]
#isat#in stars and time#isat mirabelle#isat spoilers#<- due to act 3 optional content !#the img might be being chewed due to weird canvas size oops ah well#one of these miras is not like the other#one of these miras doesnt belong ASFASFSDAFA#a majority of these are based on things mentioned / that happen in the house cuz i thought itd be fun to draw :D#so like the wilting plant is from gardening room dialogue#the poster with ppl holding hands and sparkly eyes is (i think??) from some SAPSAPSAAP dialogue in one of the first rooms#i tried looking around ISAT to see if it's also in there too but couldnt find it so uh correct me if im wrong if thats NOT an exclusive LOL#side note the 2 in the poster are some old nuz ocs isatified ASDFASFA#funnily enough tho they are from 2 different games if they actually ever met they would hate each others guts i think. hmm...#however both are also the most qualified to help with promotional stuff so theres that ASDFAFA#mira looking at her bonding proposals is sorta on the tin but#the fact that she has like right next to her while she sleeps in her dresser makes me :(#cuz to me it potrays how much theyve been weighing over her cuz of how close shes been keeping them with her vs putting them on a bookshelf#or something idk if that makes sense i dont have proper words atm#but uhhh moving on chalkboard is from one of the optional events#which i think is! important!!! i dont think ive seen many ppl talk about it but!! yeah!#however i too do not have words on it atm but!!! yeah!!!! moving on for now!#the 'mira' that is really just the change god is ofc from the change god event :]#aaand ofc the iconic finish from mira towards the king#and then some misc miras with swords for funsies tbh ASFAFA#but yeah! i like mira a lot actually but as with many things i do not currently have many words to properly articulate *why*#all i know in my heart of hearts is that she is near and dear and special to me personally#one day. one day i will be able to gather my thoughts in a cohesive manner but that day. is not today!#anyway tag talk over :]
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Why are college websites sooo stingy with their details, I just want to know what the course actually entails, like what are the concepts they're actually teaching, and they're like oh we're too cool and aloof and mysterious, we can't let you know that, teehee, now sign up for my email list that just redirects you to the home page, boy.
#this is why i never went to college forever and still might not#because their websites are clearly designed by someone who hasn't gone#also good luck getting a cost estimate 😭#i hate it here#ignore me#i thought for a second i might be able to consider looking into schooling for once but i'm convinced college websites are a form of#infernal punishment meant only to cause grief and make the process scary as possible#and also i have no confidence in my skills anymore due to idk adhd and anxiety! so it's all much much too much to consider facing
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Finally settled on designs for the springlocks im actually okay with
#knife's art#digital art#hey. sam&max reference jumpscares you#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#spring bonnie#fredbear#idk if i should tag as fredbear or golden freddy.. idk i never gave too much of a shit abt the lore and minor character differences whateve#still not really pleased but i dont hate it. whatever#designing freddy and crew is going to SUCK i spent so much time just figuring out these two#cw blood
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Personally what I like best in terms of who’s older between Donnie and Leo is just them never knowing for sure BUT imagine Leo going up to Draxum and saying he’ll never bring up the roof incident again if Draxum tells Donnie that Leo’s the older twin.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt headcanons#rise donnie#rise leo#rise draxum#donnie would be so mad he would be SURE Leo had something to do with this#and Leo would just be like idk what to tell you bro Draxum said what he said#I’m pretty sure somewhere it was stated that Leo is the older one?#but tbh if I had to pick it’s just more interesting for Leo - the one who’s alwaysss the oldest in other iterations - to be second youngest#not that there’s like any difference tbh they’re so close in age that it doesn’t change much EXCEPT who has older/younger sib rights#it also makes Raph and Leo’s dynamic more interesting too since in fiction it usually is the oldest and second oldest fighting it out#again though I’m pretty sure canon says Leo is older#my personal pref is just never knowing#and if I HAD to pick then older Donnie is more interesting#I also like older donnie because it moves him up closer to April and I like that#but yeah - overall not knowing is best#oh yeah and Leo being second youngest also makes another interesting dynamic with Mikey as well#because you’d have Leo who never gets the gentle treatment opposed with Mikey who hates getting the gentle babying treatment
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