#idk. help me downsize!!!!

[inkfox]

how does one sell jewelry they don't wear anymore

[etrosgate]

Liar Game. it's a psychological thriller manga, with each arc dedicated to a different Game that tests the participants abilities to outwit each other, in contests of trust and betrayal, with the stakes of a lifetime of debt on the line. highly recommended for anyone who loves mind games and clever deduction, and it's got a lack of violence that's very atypical for the death/debt game genre, so it's a great pick even for the squeamish.

but one of my biggest obstacles in recommending liar game is how most of the english fan translations routinely misgender fukunaga, one of the main characters who is a trans woman.

(for the record, her writing does start out pretty transphobic at the beginning (a classic trap+reveal twist, kinda cartoon villainy), but it soon rounds out and she ends up easily one of the best characters in the manga)

essentially. i have decided to at least attempt going through the entire manga and fixing her pronouns (and swapping out the r slurs that inevitably end up in every manga fan translation for some reason lol).

completed arcs are in separate zip files, for size considerations on your end And so i can post some before i finish all 201 chapters. (also i really don't care about redistribution or credit, spread them wherever you like lol)

please give the series a shot and tell me if you enjoy it! it'll do wonders for my motivation haha.

i'll probably move stuff to a different site at some point but. for now. you can download them here. [ACT 6 "PANDEMIC GAME" IS AVAILABLE NOW!!]

want to be notified when the next act is out? you can click the three dots at the top right of this post and follow it!

just a few additional warning for the series:

some of these are vague cause i haven't revisited them yet so it's just in my memory lol

the recurring antagonist yokoya explicitly admires hitler, and his rushed... idk if i'd go so far as to call it redemption? but it brings it back in a way i remembered being weird

in chapter 59 of the contraband game, yokoya squeezes some mice in with his hand and throws them do the ground, but it's not really graphic beyond squeals and it lasts like 2 panels

in chapter 18 of the downsizing game, you see the body of someone who has committed suicide, but it's no more graphic than an intact body with a blood splatter

backstories discuss stuff like cults, suicide, and abuse

stuff that isn't content warnings but i want to inform you of anyway

its ending is infamously unsatisfying, from a really rushed/boring final game, to leaving off on a major cliffhanger. speaking for myself, just knowing that reputation helped me enjoy that section for what it is instead of being bitter about what it isn't.

please trust me when i say that kanzaki nao has gradual but significant character development (without losing any of her fundamental attributes). like don't worry, this isn't the case of a female protag who exists solely to get saved by a guy who is always the smartest cool guy. it's way more interesting than that. just give her time (act 4 is where she really starts to shine, imo).

if i've forgotten something major please tell me lmao

[ofliterarynature]

TBR TAKEDOWN: Week 3 (June 16)

TLDR: I have too many unread books, and I’m asking tumblr to help me downsize. Pick one or none, and comment if you can - a convincing sentence is worth a dozen votes! You’re also welcome to just choose the one that sounds the worst :D Book descriptions below the cut, see my pinned post for more info.

The Queen’s Readers: A Collection of Essays on the Words & Worlds of Tamora Pierce ed. Amanda Diehl & Holly Vaughn

(Listen, I mostly just put this one on here so y’all would know it exists.)

Over the course of her career, Tamora Pierce has created two worlds that continue to inspire readers more than 30 years after her first book was published.

In The Queen's Readers, contributors explore a myriad of topics as only fans can: with love and a critical eye. With more than 30 essays covering topics from feminism to Pierce's mythical creatures Stormwings, no fictional stone is left unturned.

Adulting: How to Become a Grown-Up in 468 Steps by Kelly Williams Brown

(A friend in college bought this for me and I have no idea if it’s at all helpful or just annoying.)

If you graduated from college but still feel like a student . . . if you wear a business suit to job interviews but pajamas to the grocery store . . . if you have your own apartment but no idea how to cook or clean . . . it's OK. But it doesn't have to be this way. Just because you don't feel like an adult doesn't mean you can't act like one. And it all begins with this funny, wise, and useful book. Based on Kelly Williams Brown's popular blog, ADULTING makes the scary, confusing "real world" approachable, manageable-and even conquerable. This guide will help you to navigate the stormy Sea of Adulthood so that you may find safe harbor in Not Running Out of Toilet Paper Bay, and along the way you will learn: What to check for when renting a new apartment-Not just the nearby bars, but the faucets and stove, among other things. When a busy person can find time to learn more about the world- It involves the intersection of NPR and hair-straightening. How to avoid hooking up with anyone in your office -- Imagine your coworkers having plastic, featureless doll crotches. It helps. The secret to finding a mechanic you love-Or, more realistically, one that will not rob you blind. From breaking up with frenemies to fixing your toilet, this way fun comprehensive handbook is the answer for aspiring grown-ups of all ages

Silhouette of Mary Ann: Being a Life Story of George Elliot by J.E. Buckrose

(This is from at latest the 1930s and I can’t easily find a description of it; it seems to possibly be a novelization/fictionalized version of George Elliot’s life? I have read ONE George Elliot book, idk)

[mexcraziness-art]

TGCF: Anticipation

 Yeah so, anyways, remember kids, art is an inherently masochistic tendency

Okay so, this August I was visiting my family, and while I was there my little sister made me watch the Heaven Official's Blessing (Tian Guan Ci Fu) Donghua, and long story short, after about 6 hours of denial I have accepted my fate and I've stolen all her books and I'm here now 3 months later, I spoilered myself on literally everything and when I tell you the absolute death grip this shitshow has on me The absolute death-grip this ship has on me, oh my GOD I can't put it into words how much I'm not normal about Lang Qianqiu and Qi Rong

ANYWAYS SPOILERS

Through my incoherent descent into madness, I had the idea what if before his soul fully reformed and came back Qi Rong was conscious for a while, like he could see and hear his surroundings but there wouldn't be enough of him for others to see him yet, something something isolation but also some time for him to think and feel conflicted about the fact that Lang Qianqiu is not only raising his son but helping to bring him back Also I headcanon him to be gone for like, 3-ish years, so Guzi is like, 10 years old here Idk I have many thoughts and emotions about this so naturally I had to let them out in the most masochistic way possible

Also this piece was also inspired by a little comic by @/starbiology​ (on both Twitter and Tumblr): https://at.tumblr.com/starbiology/nightmare/i7budjcsdzvi (Also special Thank You to her for explaining QiuRong to me when I was still new to the Fandom)

It didn't exactly turn out the way I wanted it to, I couldn't make some things work the way I wanted, but I'm pretty happy with the overall outcome (Despite the fact that I struggled so much with it holy shit, I'm never drawing anything again without making a proper charachter design ref-sheet first, the pain and suffering it was to figure out the designs on the fly, I'm never doing that again, same with the colors, it genuinely felt like I was purging something from myself drawing this) I had to downsize it like 3 times because it was too big to turn into a gif, which is just a travesty, so I'll probably upload the non-gif full size image tomorrow TGCF belongs to MXTX Art by @mexcraziness-art 

[saltminerising]

I wish they we're still doing massive apparel sets for notn. the new stuff is just... nothing? like if they just want to downsize notn for other reasons, sure whatever, but if i remember correctly the reason given for all this was to make notn easier for new players to catch up on? which doesn't make sense at all? like regardless of how much or little apparel they do, it's never gonna matter because it's always gonna be somebody's first notn. and yeah, grinding for all the materials your first year sucks! i've been there! it took nearly 3 notns for me to finally get everything i wanted! but doing less stuff wont help with that, or at least not that much. even if they stopped adding stuff to notn entirely, it wouldn't matter because every notn is someone's first, and unless they just retired the old items, newbies are still gonna have to grind all the old stuff. idk it just sucks that notn feels so much weaker for the sake of "helping people catch up" and it doesn't even do anything. i miss the old notn and getting to see all the cool sets so much, the last 2 years have just been so disappointing.

[decolonize-the-everything]

You know

This might be a hot take but I think humans fucked up when we imagined utopias as being pure.

Like why is that the goal. It's not even realistic. In no dimension or universe is everyone a perfect parent, partner, sibling, coworker, etc. Even in utopias where resources have been socialized there is hardship. You will hurt others intentionally or not and they will do the same to you.

People will still do awful things and try to get away with them, there will still be people afraid of progress, there will Always be something.

Nothing is perfect and bad will always coexist with goodness. Utopias aren't real, a world that's safe where everyone is housed and fed and happy and nobody commits crimes and all parents are good isn't real. It's not real.

Accept that. Then let it go.

I say this because this idea that something must be Pure to be good or valuable comes up a Lot anytime a progressive policy or idea is given to the public to chew on.

"what about the (criminal) who would (horrifying crime) if they were free??" Or "what about (hypothetical con artist) who might take advantage of (system intended to help less marginalized) and waste resources?" Or "what about how (system intended to help) could negatively impact me, personally?" Or "I agree we should (take care of people) but I don't think (hyper specific scenario where Taking Care of People could be the Wrong choice) is the right choice."

Them the rules, idk.

Nobody will ever be 100% happy with everything and there is no 100% guarantee what we change will work for everyone. So we compromise.

The idea of utopias isn't to make One group happy and more comfortable than the others or to give special attention to One kind of person. It's to benefit Everyone. And sometimes yeah that does mean you might have to downsize so someone else can have a home. But what matters is that now you both have safe shelter.

Downsizing and it's equivalent is the price you pay. You live in a society that takes care of you so you do what you can to take care of your community in return. You know they'd do the same.

You need to accept that sometimes the goal is worth the price you pay, even if it's not implemented perfectly, even if it can't help everyone it should, even if it's not for you, even if it Takes from you.

If it Takes from you the same way Civil Rights took from white people or the way Stonewall took from homophobes then you should be happy to have less.

[greensungnostic]

((so, guess who's getting laid off.))

((well. today started off as a pretty chill day until I got taken aside and told that "due to downsizing, {my} position will no longer exist" and that as of the end of this month, i'm getting laid off. after all the hard work i've given this stupid store, after all the extra responsibilities i've done without any additional praise or pay or title or anything... i get laid off, and the transphobic old woman who can barely do her job right without misleading a customer or crashing her register is getting to stay.best of all, the only reason i didn't just get laid off today was because my friend is the floor-lead and raised hell to get them to keep me til the end of the month - they were just gonna ditch me unceremoniously out of nowhere without a hint of warning. i'm... honestly beside myself with hurt and upset and i really, really don't know what to do right now. like... i guess i get the next couple weeks worth of pay and such, but... Like... finding a job in this city is hard for someone with no degree and no car of her own, especially with as limited of availability for interviews and such as i have. i uh. i dunno what to do, yall.))

((i might be around more for a bit, might be around less, but. idk. if anyone has any good leads or like. wants to help out somehow let me know i guess--))

[hawkmothmoon]

It takes too much to please me

Attached, but no real feeling

High-fives and corporate anthems

Nothing comes to mind

Kite marked for true low standards

Where more wants all and no less

Just change with no real progress

Nothing comes to mind

I want higher

Still nothing comes to mind

Give me a low five

'Cause I can't help myself

I'm a low five downsize no-one else

Do you love yourself?

Sneaker Pimps, “Low Five”

Sneaker Pimps album “Splinter” is my all time favorite album. It’s what I listen to when my anxiety has me in a tailspin.

I half-expect to find myself / In full control of nothing else / Last hope, but learned to hope less / Nothing comes to mind / I want higher / Still nothing comes to mind

Idk, it’s one of the songs that I kinda associate with Carmy!

[angstyaches]

If you’re still taking prompts, would you write something with Donnacha looking after Henry? Maybe since Henry doesn’t want to go out and hasn’t been shopping, he eats something that’s gone off and it makes him really sick

CW: depression, anxiety around social cues, idk how to tag this but Henry is repeatedly triggered by things he knows are unreasonable but is triggered nonetheless, food mention, food poisoning, chronic pain mentioned, spicy times (hinted at; happening in another room), stomach ache, nausea, emeto, platonic cuddling, platonic kissing, platonic caretaking, brief mention of break-up (Donnacha and Autumn).

Word Count: 4,500 (yeah)

___ 

Henry slowly moved the fork towards his mouth, barely able to convince his lips to come apart long enough to place a scrap of spaghetti Bolognese inside. Then, it was just a case of convincing his jaws to work so that he could chew. It wasn’t much, but it was honest work, he reckoned.

He’d cooked this three days ago, when he’d been hit by a sudden wave of inspiration regarding taking care of his own basic needs. (Bolognese was one of the only things he knew how to make.) He’d also had an exceptionally long shower and shaved his neck that night. Stubble had already found its way back to him, and he hadn’t felt the urge to cook anything else.

He made a face as he chewed. Had his cooking always been this bland, or were his tastebuds checking out as punishment for the lack of variety he’d been offering them? Or maybe he’d blasted them to hell with the microwaved leftovers without realising it? It wasn’t unheard of for Henry to accidentally damage himself and not realise it until hours later.

Still, the food itself couldn’t be too bad, since he hadn’t automatically retched after taking the first bite. His body just liked to complain.

He glimpsed over a couple of pages of The Catcher in the Rye while he ate. The book was one of the oldest things he still owned, gifted to (stolen for?) him by his secondary school English teacher when the school had downsized their library. It still had a list of names glued to the title page, all of them students who had graduated long before he’d even started at the school.

He looked up as he heard the front door click, eyeing the space in the hall that was visible from the living room table.

A low, tittering giggle made his ears tingle. It didn’t match up with the sounds of anybody who usually came through here.

“Don’t worry!” Lucy. “I would’ve tripped, too, but I’m weirdly well-coordinated. I’m like a mountain goat.”

Henry raised an eyebrow, for no one’s benefit in particular. Lucy was so loud when she was tipsy. And such a liar, too. He’d seen her trip over empty air more times than he could count.

She popped into view, tipping her pink-haired head forward and looking into the living room out of habit. All of the flatmates usually did this, sussing out who was already home and occupying the common space.

She had a ‘friend’ with her. The giggler. She was a good half-foot taller than Lucy, helped by a pair of patent black platform sandals.

“Hi, Henry.” Lucy stood with her shoulders pulled back further than normal, with her hands held behind her back. It always amused Henry, just how differently she acted while she was in the middle of seducing someone. Like him, she was a bit of a social shapeshifter. “This is Cassidy.”

“Hi, Cassidy.” Henry was suddenly very aware of the fact that he was a) wearing a tattered wool sweater on top of yet another wool sweater and b) holding a steaming spoonful of spaghetti Bolognese halfway up to his mouth. “Nice shoes.”

“Thanks,” Cassidy grinned. “They tripped me up on the stairs.”

Henry had guessed as much. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good.” Cassidy took hold of Lucy’s arm. “Ooh, what are you reading there?”

Henry lifted his book to show her the cover.

“Salinger, nice,” Cassidy smiled. Henry didn’t have a good enough grasp on her personality to know if she was being sarcastic or genuine, but what he did know was that she’d just pronounced the ‘g’ in ‘Salinger’ as though it should made a ‘guh’ sound.

He opened his mouth to correct her. “Actually, it’s –”

“We’re going to my room now,” Lucy interrupted. She sounded like a six-year-old bragging about their action figure collection.

Henry nodded sardonically. “Happy for you, hon.”

This was… partly true. He was about five percent happy for his bestie, while ninety percent of his emotional capacity was leaning towards envy and self-hatred. Henry hadn’t brought anyone home in so long that, out of sheer pity, Lucy had stopped outwardly teasing him about it.

The remaining five percent? It was burning with dissatisfaction at not being able to correct Cassidy’s pronunciation of ‘Salinger’.

The two girls continued down the hall, and Henry finally finished bringing his fork to his mouth. His chewing grew a bit more aggressive, and he scooped up some more Bolognese before he’d even swallowed.

His last attempted hook-up had spooked him a little bit, but that had been months ago. Maybe it was time to get back on the apps. Maybe he’d do it tonight. Maybe he’d stay up late, make himself look pretty, take a few new selfies to post –

No. Henry scowled, taking another flavourless bite. No procrastinating. He had a few pretty big commissions on his plate right now, and one of them in particular needed at least a few hours of his attention tonight. And it was already nearing 11pm, as the cat-shaped pendulum clock on the wall informed him.

Shit. Where is the name of all that was holy had the evening gone?

With his stomach relatively full, and his deadline anxiety spiking, Henry started to get up from the table. He grabbed his plate with one hand and his cane with the other, and brought his leftovers (left-leftovers?) to the kitchen.

___

As he settled into his desk chair, Henry pulled on some noise-cancelling headphones to drown out the sounds of t.A.T.u. that were drifting through the wall he shared with Lucy’s room. He didn’t object to Lucy’s music choices in the slightest, but he preferred to block everything out with white noise when he had work to do.

“It’s Salinger,” he grumbled under his breath, knowing Cassidy wouldn’t hear him, but needing to say it in order to move on to the next tasks at hand.

Less than two minutes after he’d pulled up his most pressing project, Henry could feel a steady stream of vibrations beginning just below his ribcage. He briefly pressed a hand against his side, feeling a ripple under his fingers. He didn’t think much of the mild discomfort. Besides a banana and a cup of tea, the leftover Bolognese had been the only thing he’d eaten all day.

He’d have to order groceries soon. He hated how much he dreaded it; he knew he was privileged to live in an age where he didn’t have to drag himself out to the supermarket, but somehow, the mental toll of shopping online was almost as hefty as the physical toll of leaving the apartment.

Maybe he should open a new internet tab and get it over with right now, while he had a vague sort of motivation to do it –

No. Henry gritted his teeth. That was just the urge to procrastinate again. And it was far too late in the day for that.

A streak of light sat across his computer screen, drifting in from the hallway. He always left the door ajar unless he was sleeping. The light hitting the screen swelled now, indicating that someone was opening the door further.

Henry almost screamed at the sudden interruption. Sure, not everybody in the world knew he had just sat down to get some work done, but… they should have!

“What?” he snapped, a little harsher than intended. He spun his chair to face the door as it opened the rest of the way, pulling off his headphones.

Donnacha’s hair was sticking up in the back and sides as he stood there, in light grey tracksuit pants and a Rick and Morty hoodie. He grimaced at Henry’s tone.

“Do you have any spare headphones?”

Henry frowned, his brain still struggling to switch gears. “Uh… yes? My old ones. Why?”

“Well, I left my ear buds at the gym, and… Lucy’s got her ‘getting lucky’ playlist on.” Donnacha grimaced widely and pointed in the general direction of Lucy’s room. “And I’d rather not be hearing it, to be honest.”

“Oh. Well, they’re not noise-cancelling –”

“That’s absolutely grand. I would go and hang out in the living room instead, but it’s freezing out there.” Donnacha pointedly rubbed at his arms, despite looking like a big, comfy marshmallow in his hoodie. “I’d rather be in bed.”

“Mmm.” Henry unplugged his extra set of headphones and extended them towards Donnacha.  

“You’re a lifesaver, Hen.”

“Don’t get the cord tangled,” Henry said, eyeing the way Donnacha immediately began to twirl said cord around his fingers.

“Who, me?” Donnacha grinned pointedly. His eyes flicked towards Henry’s computer screen. “What are you working on?”

“Just… work.” Henry had no desire to elaborate further. One of the most unfair things about social interaction, he’d always thought, was that there was no such thing as a neutral, concise answer. Concise answers were always misinterpreted, either as annoyed, disinterested, or simply rude.

“It’s kinda late to still be working.”

“I suppose it is.”

“’Kay,” Donnacha mumbled. He held the headphones up a little higher, as though waving goodbye with them. “’Night, then. Thanks.”

“Night.”

Henry turned back to his computer, pulled his headphones back on, and slipped back into his work.

___

The stomach ache crept up on him while he was in a fog of concentration, brows in a semi-permanent frown and eyes straining to keep digital lines and text from blurring. It only occurred to him that he should take a short break when a soft belch rumbled up from the pit of his belly and he tasted the tomato and basil from his dinner – much more clearly now than he had when he was actually eating it.

With his headphones blocking all outside noise, he wondered just how loud the belch had just been. Perhaps Lucy and Cassidy had just had their good time interrupted by an eruption from the depths of Henry’s stomach, and he was none the wiser.

He only worried about that for a nanosecond, though.

“Oh – Jesus, really?” Henry whispered to himself as he sat back in his desk chair.

He cradled his belly lightly with one hand. The pain seemed to slam into him all at once. As someone whose body tended to let him down at the most inopportune moments, Henry wasn’t all that surprised or concerned about the appearance of a stomach ache – but that didn’t mean he didn’t feel severely inconvenienced.

Henry snatched his glasses from his face and rubbed at his forehead, too. He wasn’t sure how massaging his head would help his stomach, but it comforted him a little bit. He glanced up in time to see the streak of light spreading across his computer screen again.

He groaned and ripped off his headphones. “Yeah, what?”

“Uh, thanks for the headphones, but they aren’t enough,” Donnacha declared. “I’m enacting Plan B. Retreating to the living room. Do you want to come watch something, seeing as you’re up, too?”

“Donnacha, I’m working, hon.”

“It’s almost one in the morning!” Donnacha chuckled. He tossed the borrowed headphones onto the bed; Henry couldn’t help but glare at the way the cord was wrapped around the top of the headset, and dread the thought of prising it off. “Come on. We can cuddle for warmth.”

“You want to cuddle me for warmth?” While they were roughly of the same height and general build, Donnacha had considerably more padding for combatting the elements than Henry did.

“Offer’s there,” Donnacha shrugged, shivering openly. “I’ll be out here, turning to ice, if you decide to take me up on it.”

Henry sighed. Why not? Lucy was getting some action; a little bit of human contact – even platonic – might ease the sting of jealousy a bit.

Besides, his stomach was bothering him enough that he knew getting back into any kind of flow would be almost impossible. And getting to sleep with Rita Ora lyrics rumbling through the wall didn’t seem very likely, either.

“Fine,” he mumbled, slipping his glasses back on and reaching for his cane. “But not Top Gun.”

“No?” Donnacha exclaimed unceremoniously. “What about Top Gun: Maverick?”

Henry groaned as the effort of standing up not only made his hip protest, but also sent a vice-grip pain through his abdomen.

Donnacha took the noise as one of protest, though. “Hey, I sat through three of your gibbly films –”

“Ghibli,” Henry murmured. What was up with the people in this household refusing to uphold the sanctity of guhs and juhs? How would Donnacha have liked it if Henry had started calling him precious Tom Hanks movie ‘Top Jun’?

“– So, now, you can whisht up and watch something I like.”

“Okay.” Henry didn’t have the capacity to argue, or to make his Top Jun remark. He was barely even sure he had enough energy to get to the living room without needing to stop and curl up in a ball on the floor. His stomach felt like it’d twisted itself up like Donnacha twisted up headphone cords.

He wasn’t getting up any slower than he usually did when his hip flared up, which meant that Donnacha didn’t notice anything was off. Henry was confused at the mild feeling of disappointment this brought on.

“I’m going to make us some tea,” Donnacha decided, turning to make his way towards the kitchen.

___

Henry declined the tea when Donnacha offered to make him some, unsure of how well it would settle in his stomach at this point. The effort of walking from his desk to the living room sofa had shoved the taste of his dinner back up into his mouth again.

He also decided to forgo any further protest regarding Donnacha’s choice of movie; the boy had made a fair (albeit poorly pronounced) point about allowing Henry to choose the movie three times in a row. Plus, maybe Top Gun would finally help Henry understand the appeal that Donnacha saw in piloting.

Three minutes in, Henry knew he’d made the right decision. (Not regarding the movie; it was already as pompous and self-indulgent as he’d predicted it would be.)

But he’d almost... forgotten how nice it was to cuddle, and he wanted to kick himself for not availing of Donnacha’s company more often during the winter months.

Playing rugby and working out meant that his muscles were taut, but his penchant for comfort foods and snacks kept him somewhat soft. His body was in a perfect state of balance. Just like his ability to juggle his career and his hobbies. His city life and his country soul. His athletic side and his intellectual side.

His willingness to watch Studio Ghibli (subbed, not dubbed, as it should be), and his insistence on making Henry sit through Top Gun.

Henry paid as much attention as he could, but it was hard not to let his mind wander in opposite-extreme directions; he was either distracted by the spate of unfinished work that was still waiting for him in his room, or by the fabric-softener scent of Donnacha’s hoodie.

Donnacha was sitting somewhat crookedly with his back against the arm of the couch, with Henry slotted into the space between the cushions and Donnacha’s torso. One arm was locked all the way around Henry’s shoulders, hand resting near Henry’s elbow. Henry had tentatively rested his hand on Donnacha’s stomach at first, but as he curled in closer, he’d reached across and held him by the waist.

With his free arm, Donnacha sipped on his tea, and Henry was almost convinced his stomach was giving off more and more warmth as he drank, even though he knew that was physically impossible.

He had rubbed Donnacha’s stomach once, when it’d been hurting. Looking back, it was definitely one of those times where Henry’s straightforwardness had, perhaps, made the situation more awkward than it needed to be, but Donnacha had seemed to be okay with it.

Would he do the same for Henry now, if he asked?

His closest – scratch that, only – friend growing up had been Lucy, and while they were always there for one another, she had never exactly been the touchy-feely type. They hugged on occasion, but never spontaneously or for an extended amount of time. And as a kid, Henry had had too many experiences of getting something ‘wrong’ – like taking something they weren’t using right out of someone’s hand, or trying to kiss his friends the way his aunts would kiss him on his cheek, or telling someone he loved them… Doing these things meant that he was rude, weird, creepy.

Since last year, it felt like they had started rewriting all of those ‘rules’, just between the two of them.

Henry swallowed and looked up at Donnacha’s clean-shaven jawline. A familiar, yet unpredictable, pang of guilt rippled through his belly. Since he’d been part of the reason for Donnacha ending his previous relationship, Henry couldn’t shake the feeling of responsibility towards him. He wondered if that was all this was. Duty. Compensation. Here I am, a consolation prize.

“You okay?” Donnacha asked, noticing his gaze as he took a slurp of his tea.

Henry held his breath and considered telling Donnacha about feeling sick to his stomach. His mouth made a decision before his brain could.

“Yeah, I’m good.”

Donnacha smiled, “Good!” and turned his attention back to the movie.

Henry shifted a couple of times during the next hour, adjusting the pressure on his stomach. There was less of a pain there now, which was a small relief until he forced himself to watch the TV screen. The rotating planes and whizzing backgrounds became a little much for Henry’s eyes to cope with.

Henry turned his head as far into Donnacha’s chest as he could without knocking his glasses from his face. Maybe – maybe he could just fall asleep? He found himself wondering if Donnacha would try to carry him back to bed if that happened. The image of his own lanky form being scooped into a bridal carry should have made him snort in derision, but it actually made a lump rise in his throat.

A lump, or... something a little more acidic.

Henry’s eyes shot open. His head felt like it was being swallowed up by the stinging, mouth-watering certainty that things were not okay. A knot of pressure sank to the bottom of his stomach and then took a sharp, upward turn – like water trying to flow down a drain and finding itself being forced back to the surface.

“Donnacha.”

“Yep?”

“I’m going to be sick?”

Henry must have sounded extremely surprised and confused himself, because Donnacha didn’t seem to understand what he’d said at first.

“Something… something I ate is not – hmrph.” Henry shot forward and gagged, almost puking straight onto his pyjama bottoms.

“Shite, where’s the bin?” Donnacha stood up and idly glanced around, clicking his tongue in annoyance. Through teeth that suddenly ground together in annoyance, he muttered, “Payton’s always taking it into their room –”

Henry whimpered as his belly cramped, sending a surge of gurgling, bubbling heat towards his throat. The sound seemed to fill in for the urgency missing in his tone, since it was then that Donnacha truly sprang into action.

“Right – here. Aim onto the blanket for now,” he instructed, grabbing the couch throw and tossing it towards Henry’s lap. He chuckled nervously. “That can go in the washing machine more easily than the carpet.”

Henry nodded, though he had no intention of letting himself vomit onto something that was communal property. Other people used this blanket. He was fairly sure Lucy had paid for it, along with the other random assortment of IKEA pieces in the living room.

Donnacha ran off to the kitchen and immediately started clattering around under the sink. By the time he emerged – mere seconds later – Henry’s chin was streaked with drool from fighting the urge to puke on the throw.

“Here you –”

Henry was already gagging while still in the process of taking the bucket into his hands. He belched forcefully, eyes watering as his pathetic dinner splattered all along the inside of the bucket. There were still lumps of meat, strands of spaghetti, none of it digested beyond Henry’s disinterested chewing.

He tried to draw a ragged breath in between retches, and almost choked for having the audacity. This bucket was used on the rare occasion that someone decided to mop the kitchen and bathroom floors, and it reeked like a pile of old, musty towels.

Henry heaved again.

He was certain his eyes rolled back in his head and that he moaned at one point, as his body curled further and further forward on the edge of the sofa. Like a toothpaste tube being squeezed within an inch of its existence.

And then it stopped, as suddenly as it had started. The relief was so intense that it was almost its own form of pleasure. Henry grimaced at the tickle of laughter that crept up through his chest and throat. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been that violently ill before, and he was so, so glad that it seemed to be over.

For now.

“Hen,” Donnacha said in disbelief, as though he had been waiting for Henry to stop puking before scolding him about it. He handed Henry a tissue that he’d apparently been holding in anticipation. “Your poor belly. What’d you eat?”

Henry dabbed his chin clean, hand trembling horribly. His stomach muscles burned as though he’d just attempted a hundred push-ups. “Just some leftovers.”

“Left over from when? The Last Supper?”

Henry groaned in a feeble attempt to show his dislike for the joke.

“Anyway.” Donnacha rubbed a hand over the bumps in Henry’s spine with one hand, and took hold of the bucket with the other. “We can talk about your bad life choices another time. Try to catch your breath, yeah?”

“Um,” said a voice that wasn’t Lucy’s or Payton’s. “Hi?”

Henry glanced up to see Cassidy standing in the hallway and peering in. She was wearing a plaid shirt of Lucy’s which was not long enough for someone of Cassidy’s height to wear as a nightie.

Shit. Lucy.

Guilt sank its teeth into Henry’s nerve endings. He’d been so distracted, and feeling so god-damn sorry for himself, that he’d almost forgotten Lucy was only a few doors down, likely hearing him purge his guts.

He knew what Cassidy was going to say before she even tried.

“Um,” she mumbled again, tugging the shirt down at the front as though she’d suddenly become conscious of its length. “Lucy is very distressed, and she sent me to ask you if someone is… vomiting?”

From the way she scrunched up her nose and eyed the mop bucket, it seemed as though Cassidy already had her answer.

“Food poisoning!” Donnacha sounded like he was shouting out an answer on Family Fortune. “Tell her it’s – it’s food poisoning. Not contagious in the slightest. That’ll make her feel… well, a smidge better about it.”

Cassidy nodded slowly, as though she understood but… didn’t fully understand.

“Donnacha, by the way. My pronouns are he/him.”

“Hi. Cassidy. She/her.” Cassidy shook herself. “Anyway. Bye, guys.”

“Bye, Cassidy,” Henry and Donnacha both droned, Henry mumbling it miserably through a mouthful of watery spit, Donnacha furrowing his brow and returning to rubbing Henry’s back.

“Are ya alright?”

Henry shrugged. He slowly began to sit back. The thought of letting himself sink into the sofa cushions was pure bliss. How food poisoning managed to affect every inch of the human body – not just the digestive tract, as predicted – he would never know.  

“Your poor belly,” Donnacha said again, though his tone wasn’t as interrogative this time. He clicked his tongue sympathetically, and slid a little closer.

He then seemed to realise that Top Gun was still playing on the screen, and he reached for his phone to turn it off.

“Sorry,” he laughed softly.

 Henry’s heart skipped a beat when a warm hand slid across his stomach, rubbing back and forth over his bubbling insides. The gesture was so sudden and so casual that Henry barely registered the shift in Donnacha’s actions. It was as natural as a hug, seemingly.

“’Glad you got some of it up,” Donnacha said. “'Least it’s a little bit emptier in there now.”

Henry nodded weakly, entranced by the warmth that Donnacha’s hand seemed to be injecting directly into his organs as he massaged his stomach. He found himself desperately wondering what was going through Donnacha’s head right now, but unable to find the words to find out.

“So…” Donnacha cleared his throat. “Please don’t tell me you ate that dodgy-looking pasta that was sitting in the fridge earlier? Because I swear to the Lord and back, Henry – if you thought that was okay to eat, you are taking the piss, and you need to go back to the optician’s and demand a refund on those new lenses.”

“I was just being lazy,” Henry murmured. “That’s all. Won’t…” He winced, feeling Donnacha’s hand automatically shift across his stomach in response to a sharp cramp. “Won’t happen again. Believe me.”

Donnacha made a noise in his throat – a hum of concern, perhaps, with a healthy dose of scepticism thrown in. He seemed to hesitate for a second before moving his face closer to Henry’s head and pressing a loud kiss into a clump of his hair.

“Hey, listen,” he whispered, stilling his hand on Henry’s belly.

Henry did, holding his breath.

Donnacha raised his free hand to point. “Since they’re not… playing music anymore,” he said, “I guess it means you and me can get some sleep now.”

While Henry had to admit that sleeping off the stomach cramps in his own bed sounded like heaven, ruining his best friend’s night and causing her to have a mild-to-severe panic response seemed like an unfair cost.

“You’re an awful human,” he muttered.

“What?” Donnacha exclaimed. “They’ve had their fun. Hours of it. It’s bed time now.”

Henry reluctantly nodded. His arm automatically lifted as Donnacha shifted his weight and made to put his arm around Henry’s back and help him up. It was a rare feeling, for him to relinquish control of his limbs, even for just a few seconds until he was on his feet and his cane was within reaching distance.

“I’ll give the bucket a rinse-out in the bath,” Donnacha said as soon as Henry was upright and established.

“Hopefully I won’t need it again.” It was a hollow hope, given the rumbling feeling that pressed against the base of Henry’s ribcage. He took a few measured steps in the direction of his bedroom, conscious of the fact that his posture was more curved than usual.

“If you do, I’ll bring Lucy your noise-cancelling headphones.”

A shudder rippled up Henry’s spine at the thought of Donnacha getting his twisty, wrap-happy hands on his good headphones.

“I know you’re joking,” he huffed, “but please don’t touch those. Ever.”

[can-of-pringles]

Big piercing story update (pictures of before and after pictures of a downsized eyebrow piercing, a very irritated one)

Ok let's get everyone caught up again. Got it pierced August 20 last year, it got snagged December and gave me grief all this time. I went back to the original piercing place in April to get help and to hopefully get it downsized but he wouldn't do it until "my eczema redness went away" so it continued to get worse and more irritated. Semi recently I accidentally scratched it in my sleep and it bled badly and had dried blood on it for a while while it recovered. It's been having bumps and yellow crust built up recently but I figured it was just part of the drama. Finally, I called another piercing place today to get a second opinion because I needed help. I went and explained everything, including the part about not being able to get it downsized because of the eczema which they said was "wild" and since they didn't have the right length of jewelry they sent me to another location of theirs. Someone there was able to get it downsized. And told me to clean it day and night with antibacterial soap for now (I haven't used that before since I thought it wasn't the best but seeing the state it's in idk maybe it needs it. I can't use saline because it dries it out. So I just wash it in the shower for a minute and pat dry after) so right now of course it's very ouch and upset but I really hope this will fix all my problems. It's been going on for months and I'm exhausted. My old jewelry was titanium implant grade and 16g threadless. I honestly don't know much about this new one I was very anxious and sort of just sped by but I think it's either titanium or stainless steel, I know titanium is preferred but they didn't have a lot in the size and it was slightly in an emergency state. I don't know if it's still 16g or not? Is that the thickness or the length? I think thickness? It doesn't say on the receipt.

[heaps-of-dream]

I just wanted to a few headcanons/ideas of what Hob’s modern living space would be like, but wound up with this 850+ word list (idk why this fascinated me so much). Might have a followup post to this as I come up with more ideas for him, or if anyone asks for any further detail about his home life -- Hob Gadling is Domestic in my book

When one lives for over 600 years, you pick up a few things…

Tomes and diaries are something Hob found the most difficult to part with, yet they were also the most cumbersome to transport. How could he just wistfully discard something that was forged so personally? Other’s lives are fleeting, and sometimes what is on those pages is all that is left of them

While not having many dinner guests, Hob has still held on to several sets of ceramics and cutlery. Those are quite cumbersome to move too, so he has downsized to only keeping two of everything (“Mix-and-match kitchen sets are all the rage in this century!”)

He has a few paintings adorning his walls by some familiar (not exactly household) names, but he keeps his favorites in his office. Most are nearly unrecognizable early sketches of famous works, but there are quite a few images brandishing a bushy-haired man in black, which live behind glass as if they were the Mona Lisa

One thing that he does make ample room for is clothes. He tries to keep things that are staples of a period, as well as anything that is “just too comfortable to part with – they certainly don’t make them like they used to”.

He has all of the outfits he ever wore to his meetings with Dream. They reside in a trunk that he keeps under the head of his bed, folded and unworn since their last day in the sun. He doesn’t really know why he insists on keeping them (it’s not like he plans on wearing a dingy tunic again anytime soon), but there is something so… sentimental, he supposes, about holding on to the memories those clothes hold for him – and what he would hope also hold for his Stranger

His furniture is an eclectic mess of authentic antiques, passible knock-offs, and Ikea furniture. All of which he has had to disassemble and reassemble with every move, hence his lack of fondness for furniture

He does have a reading chair that he cherishes; he got it in exchange for a favor with a skilled woodworking friend in the mid 1500’s, and it was the jewel of his family’s home at the time (actual chairs were a hot commodity in that time period). So after losing them he could not bring himself to part with the item, but has since added upholstery because “Have you tried sitting on bare wood for hours grading papers? Now that is Medieval”

The kitchen is surprisingly the most modern room in the house (not including the bathroom, which has the most state-of-the-art jacuzzi, of course). Hob was born without the gift of being a chef, but he certainly has had plenty of time to practice. He has a collection of cookbooks, most of which are handwritten and passed down from old friends throughout the centuries

Baking is his favorite thing to do in the kitchen, and he definitely stress-bakes. Though the payoff for staying up well into the night both baking and grading essays is many plates of delicious treats for his equally stressed-out students

He keeps a decently-sized garden out on his patio, and he is quite adept at keeping them alive and thriving (he blames lots and lots of trial and error). They’re mostly herbs and seasonal fruits, with a mix of local wildflowers thrown in for his pollinating friends. He uses his plants for cooking and elixirs – more for household use than personal. On occasion he will gift some to others who he believes they will help; a sleeping potion for an exhausted intern, a pain reliever for his elderly neighbor, a sweet tonic dropped in the university fountain to make the water potable for the birds (and for when Matthew is sent to check on him)

His bed is something that is definitely modern; he has laid his head many a place over the centuries, and has learned the significance of having a good night's rest. Since taking up an occupation that has a rather rigid schedule, sleep has become all the more important. Despite the tentative whispers of his students, Hob can confirm that there has been little sharing of his bed with others (that is until a certain Mysterious Stranger starts frequenting his lectures, and accompanying him on his walks home)

He does own a single television, but he doesn’t use it much. He also has a laptop and smartphone, mostly for school-related use. He prefers to spend his time reading books and articles, and mostly watches documentaries and several international news networks. His guilty pleasure is renting American action films; he especially finds sci-fi fascinating (“Who would have ever thought about those sorts of things happening? Honestly, if I were to have suggested it, I would have been convicted as a witch again.”

I picture his home to be not too dissimilar to this place (which is a real-life, rentable Medieval-style cottage that is absolutely adorable). I just imagine it to have a lot more decor and darker color scheme, plus be not too far from the university where Hob teaches

[lazylogic]

Just to clarify, my rant yesterday was not me doomposting about the latest Tumblr developments - in fact I'd completely forgotten about them for a bit LOL

IMO I think the downsizing and re-focusing has the potential to actually be a good thing for the site (unfortunately probably not the people working on it, I feel really bad for those who are being disrupted by this). In my experience, it's generally healthier to 1. have smaller, more focused teams working on a thing where communication is easier and playing telephone is less of a risk, and 2. improving on what is already there, and working on/fixing things that people have been asking for for ages, instead of just shoeing in a bunch of random features no one asked for. I understand a lot of it was due to contracts and legal and business stuff, but it sounds like maybe they've seen the light and will condense their focus a bit. Please note that I probably have no idea what I'm talking about, I don't work in this business, and I don't consider my words objective or anything so just...please be nice >>

I don't think it's helpful for people to go, every time something like this comes up, "Tumblr is falling apart again bye I guess I should jump ship" because shit yeah it's gonna fall apart when people keep leaving and singing swan songs. It's okay if it's what you wanna do, I know the feeling of not wanting to be on a website just as well, and a lot of alienating decisions have been made so I don't blame people for throwing their hands up. Idk, I don't think there's a right or wrong and I don't wanna come off like I'm condemning people for just doing what they feel is best for them. I think I'm just desperate to be optimistic because I miss liking Tumblr. There's no hostility intended in this post!

[cappuccinopoweredsprite]

My thoughts on Lockwood & co. season 1

I've just binged the last four episodes (having seen all 8) and I have some opinions to share with the void.

This is your spoiler warning.

There will be spoilers for Season 1 of the show and at least the first two books past this point.

This would be a good time to mention I was going into this having read all 5 of the books, so some things were likely less surprising to me than to others.

The order isn't really particular and I might add more things as I think of them.

I like the expansion on Lucy's time at Jacobs. This was only described briefly in the first book and it adds some nice background to her character.

I especially like the character of Norrie, who was completely absent from the books. Not only as a childhood friend of Lucy, but also her state and the implications put on it by the plot. Knowing how it progresses after the 2nd book (which is roughly where the plot of season 1 ends), I think we will hear of her again, and I'm looking forward to her role in the future.

On the other hand, I generally prefer the book's depiction of whole Combe Carey scene/portion. I just feel like it wasn't given enough space in the series. I'm wording it this way because I don't really want to say I disliked it, I recognize the creative decision to briefen it (is that a word? idk) for the series. The succession of events is more or less all there, what mostly suffered is the depth of Fairfax's character as well as his relationship and interactions with Lockwood & co.

Saunders is a cheap fuck who should be hit with several fines and maybe a shovel for good measure.

What I disliked more was the section in Bickerstaff's house. I understand there likely wasn't time for it, but it was really downsized compared to my memories of the book passage. Firstly, Simon Wilberforce would have been a really cool ghost with his falling apart into rats. The patients were interesting with their fading in and out, but they don't hold a candle to Wilberforce's book depiction. Plus, and I might be biased as a reader, I would have enjoyed seeing more people than just Lucy scared, and also Lockwood & co's interaction with Kipps' team.

Here I'll take a moment to say I have noticed the changes some characters went through compared to the books - some clearly in the name of diversity - and frankly most of them don't bother me. I will say though that show Winkman is considerably more of a psycho than I remember book Winkman being - again, not that I disliked it, just noticed the difference.

Another thing I noticed are the cars. I am a car nerd, I always do. What I want to mention is that there weren't really any new cars - considering that the series canonically takes places in 2022 (I think). Like, the newest cars that I saw around were from the early to mid 2000s, i.e. a Mk4 Vokswagen Golf or a Rover (don't know what is the model name, visible for example in ep. 3 in the background of the gang getting picked up by Fairfax's driver Ellie). Now, this can very well be just that these were the cars that were available to the production team, as I also noticed a rotation of the same cars in different scenes (such as the gray Ford Granada with aftermarket foglights or the silver Volvo 700-series sedan, both visible in multiple scenes). BUT I can't help thinking about the in-universe implications of the Problem's interference with the car industry. The Problem must have been going on for around 5 decades when the show takes place. Over time, more demand arose for other things to be made out of iron/steel than car bodies, perhaps the demand for new cars also diminished as the way of life shifted more to staying in the safety of a home as much as possible. On the other hand - and I feel like this is the more likely explanation - if the Problem is only a thing in Britain and, as I mentioned, people there started needing cars less and less - there would just be less cars (or none at all) imported to Britain. I also think this fits in better with the actual cause of the Problem, which is revealed in book 5 or 4.

[quieteclipse]

extremiun yapping about my current sims gameplay below lmao

i think i've had some really interesting sims gameplay for the first time in a while (for me personally) and it's all because i've been struggling with getting my sim's love life started.

usually it's so easy, but i'm doing my best to take relationship differences into consideration and not just jumping into something unhappy (for the long run at least....she's definitely jumped head first into am unhappy relationship & situationship lol).

but the upside is that everything else has been going great and i love that. she graduated high school early, got a distinguished degree in computer science, enough scholarships to give her a full ride, and even graduated uni before aging up to a young adult (though that is specifically because of the shorter uni mod lmao). she started at level 8 in her career and is now level 9 i believe and what was once the shitty starter home in copperdale has now been upgraded to a pretty decent house—without cheating! of course it doesn't look great on the outside because i'm not a builder, but it's what's inside that counts <3

i have one more potential beau for her in mind before i give it up for a little while and just have her adopt a kid (because she really wants to start her family now). and i say adopt because despite her having high fertility, she's been struggling getting pregnant, which is so insane to me considering her longtime situationship (wolfgang munch) ALSO has high fertility.

honestly, she's in her depression era rn (she gained the gloomy trait), so idk if i want to explore that final potential love interest just yet. she currently has the soulmate aspiration, but i think i'll change it to a nature one. i want her to reconnect with her old hobby of fishing since she doesn't have to do it for money anymore. and maybe this will help move along the storyline of her meeting and befriending her final potential love interest. since she hasn't really put much effort into her friendships in a while. usually she'd talk to people enough to know them and then she'd add them on social bunny and the relationships would take off from there.

honestly, it's been so fun having her life have its ups and downs.

in the beginning, she was social awkward and hot headed (which were randomized traits), which inspired my storyline that her parents unexpectedly died and the rest of her family took most of her inheritance (which she ended up getting a little bit of back through that one pop up), so she had to move to copperfield and majorly downsize from her previous wealthy life (since i dressed her up all rich girl preppy before i came up with a storyline).

i changed her traits to outgoing and self-assured when she aged up because being socially awkward and hotheaded did nothing to deter her from making hella friends and fast too. and because of this, through the talents & weaknesses mod, i also gave her the talent of being charismatic. i also eventually gave her the talent for programming bc it really came to her so easily; i think she leveled uo pretty quick and always had successful hacks even when she had a lower skill.

going back to her love life bc i cant stop fixating on it and that's where most of the ups & downs lie.

primarily, i'm obsessed with the constant push & pull between her and wolfgang. even though he prefers non-exclusive relationships and she prefers exclusive ones, which caused their most recent split (still unofficial as of now bc my game kept bugging out too much for me to get anywhere else, so now i must wait for the next weekend).

but to start from the beginning: in high school, malcom landgraab asked her to prom and i was gonna do a storyline where she dated him briefly to be petty since wolfgang was playing around (and also bc she was lowkey freaked by him since he kept somehow barging into her house???), but he literally never spoke to her again after he ditched her at prom (that HE invited her to mind you).

anyways, my sim (helena) decided to invite wolfgang to the usual prom after party at the pier (which i'm pretty sure he got dressed up for despite not going to prom. and i had them go on the scary ride first and then i tried helena's luck with the romantic ride and it worked!!! wolfgang was feeling her like she was feeling him and theu shared their first kiss!! but then he started playing games afterwards. which, come to find out, he viewed her as basic looking. for the longest time i thought they struggled to gain romance because wolfgang was mean & gloomy, but no!

so after that, i started trying to have helena forget about wolfgang and try out some other options.....which she didnt get very far. i was going to have her date this guy named ocean from her uni, but she got wrapped back up in wolfgang and those two ended up becoming friends with benefits.

very soon after, she became queerplatonic partners with aurelio.

now, her and aurelio became quick besties in their later teen years and i was shipping them so hard until i read his sim bio and learned that he was aroace. but they did end up getting a bit of romance even after i secured his preferences (or lack thereof) in CAS, but he also had a dislike for flirtation so there was that. later on, though, i remembered i had the mod that can specify orientation, so i made him romance/relationship favorable (though i wish i had kept it at indifferent) and woohoo averse.

i think i missed up at one point by choosing an interaction where she asked aurelio to be more than friends bc i really didnt think it did anything lmaooooo but they ended up becoming bf & gf. which sucked bc she had to break up with him twice....and this was bc he had the jealous trait and kept antagonizing her about their relationship problems??? despite them having only been together for not even a full sim day, i dont think????

chile, anyways...

i'm pretty sure she had also ended her fwb relationship with wolfgang for aurelio bc i totally forgot about that before starting anything with aurelio.

but honestly it didnt really mean anything bc i had her invite him (and others) over for new year's for a little dinner party (which idk why i do parties in my game anymore bc they never work right), and they ended up banging on the couch, in front of jeb & ocean (who, btw, also propositioned her for sex....which i accepted at first, but then denied immediately after). i felt bad for having them do that in the living roo. bc aurelio literally left the house (he was staying over btw).

anyways, after all that craziness. she ended up inviting wolfgang over again and they whoohoo'd a lot. which is where we discovered that despite bith her and wolfgang having high fertility, helena just was not getting pregnant. apparently she is also prone to having issues during pregnancy, so i'm worried about that.

due to them not getting pregnant naturally, i was gonna have helena ask wolfgang to have a science baby with her, but like i saod earlier, this is where my game really started to lag so bad i genuinely couldn't get anybody to do anything.

this era is so sad bc i had extended the house and redecorated for a potential baby and it just wasnt happening, so i ended up deleting all the baby stuff and turning the extra room into a guest room.

but i also feel bad bc i wanted helena to move out of copperdale tbh (also i might've called it copperfield somewhere earlier. i found one incident & changed it, but i could've sworn there was another, but i'm not looking for it). but i like the progress i've made on her house, i'd feel too sad to move out already. but the lot honestly isn't big enough anymore. i think i want her to have a pool even though it's still early spring in my game rn (i think i want to change the length of the seasons tho....a week is just too short).

also, i think i might finally make that switch to long life span....i want to cherish helena's young adult years, especially with what i have planned. and i dont want her adult years to be rushed either.

i'm hoping she either finds genuine love and friendship with this ken guy she had a sexy dream about once, or wolfgang suddenly wants to settle down....or maybe, she'll find someone else idk. i wish i had a proper computer setup so i wouldnt be so irritated by the lag that happens whenever going off my home lot, bc i'd love for helena to go out clubbing and exploring.

either way, i'm excited for her to adopt a child too. i definitely think that will be the next step for her, especially with her problems with conceiving. and i think i'll finally move to the world that came with the horse pack, bc i havent done a single damn thing with that pack yet (besides this one random sim i made live there at one point, her save was a random throwaway save tho). i only just recently seen an actual horse in game with helena bc aurelio'a family adopted one. i've pretty much been everywhere else.

anyways, i think i'm all yapped out about my current sim. i can't wait to play her again, but i might just wait until school is officially out until i do play my game again. i'm so invested in helena's story, just playing on weekends isnt going to cut it anymore.

i really do hope this is the gameplsy where i can actually continue a legacy. but if it is, i desperately need to start taking more pics with helena's friends. i missed their teen years (besides with wolfgang...of course), i don't want to miss their young adult ones.

[seangelfish]

TECHNICALLY i could be considered british ???? idk how it works here cause im in the silly part that doesnt know what it wants 🙏

I WISH I COULD SHOW YOU PICTURES OF IT RAGHHHH i genuinely was like debating making an account for ainon just for pictures and stuff but it just seems like so much effort HELP ??? they should let us anons use pictures too 😞😞

WHERED YOU GET THE MERCH THAT ITS THAT CHEAP ?? im scared to ask how much the shipping is though if its from a proxy site or anything like that.. the shipping for my 2wink album cost like £20 ish i think ? but do share your ways i yearn for more merch 🙏🙏🫵 MY KNIGHTS MERCH IS GONNA BE HERE SOON THOUGH AND IM SO EXCITED WAHHHH it has like the teeny tiny izumi omanjuus and like pins and pashas IM SO EXCITED !!! and also the knights x ryusetai cd AHHH

YOUR LATEST FICS ALSO ???? CRYINF…. theyre so so well written and i just aughhhh… i do like paralive but ive just never really read anything on it apart from stuff for BAE BUT THE WAY YOU WRITE IS SO CAPTIVATING IM AFRAID IM BEING PULLED INTO IT 🫡🫡

KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK AND TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF <3333 !!!

-ainon :D

That’s so interesting. I wonder what that silly part is because tbh I can’t think of a place right now 😭 But okayyy, (kind of) British enstarrie!! ჱ̒ ｰ̀֊ｰ́ )

We can always establish this writer-anon relationship into actual friends and then you can send me pics haha jk unless… But tbh, they should allow anons to send in pics. I get why they wouldn’t though 😔

I buy a lot of my merch on Mercari JP through the Buyee proxy! The shipping was the same as yours though, £20. Though, that depends on the package weight. Sometimes it only costed me £17 to ship a package from Japan to the UK, sometimes £30 😭 I always try to downsize my packages though! A lot of the merch on there is inexpensive (not Eden tho, but I’m 100% sure that 2wink and maybe Knights merch on Mercari JP is really cheap).

Tiny Izumi omanjuus!! That’s cute hehe 🤍

Omg thank you so much though!! ���💖💖💖 I really do like it when people compliment my writing, I think I’ve said this before haha but I’ve always loved writing, I even took English lit & lang for A-Levels because I wanted to write 😭

But yes!! I love when I get people into Paradox Live. I love it so so much. The characters are all so likeable and the songs are sooo good!! I got into it in early 2023 just by the songs alone! 💕

Thank you always, ainon, and take care of yourself too~ 🩵💜

[recountcuntessa]

feb19.2024

this weekend beat my ass, curbstomped, and spit on me. my car decided to up and stop moving, and since my phone is already fucked up, i was stranded. one thing i find interesting, but kinda funny now, is how strangers were so reluctant to help me. at the end of the day i dont blame them at all, people will use your kindness and empathy to hurt you its so dangerous out here. hell last time i helped a stranger who needed it, i ended up getting my phone stolen, so shit, i get it. but when i first went into the gas station to ask the clerks if i can use their phone, all teary eyed, they immediately said no and lowkey laughed at me, fuck them niggas. the next guy wouldn't let me call the police/tow truck from his phone but offered to drive me home...no thanks.

anyways, thanks to the girlie, bad bitch, queen that helped me and made sure i was good. the whole situation was stressful and set me back, but in the grand scheme of things, if i wasn't served that quick pause, i wouldn't have had the whole weekend to prepare for the midterms i had today, and i wouldnt have found out the my car has FOUR safety recalls. thankfully ford is gonna fix it all for free, soft life.

my skin is shit rn, the worst it has been in years i think. it might have to do with the downsizing of my skincare routine, bitch im broke, but maybe its stress, cus lord knows.

not that this is a major source of my stress, cus no nigga could ever, but im talking to this guy again (its been like two months since our failed talking stage) and i just really dont know. like anytime i think of the whole thing -> idk. i feel like i would know if it was something that i wanted, but at the same time i dont know if im just self sabatoging. cus this guy is, from what i can tell so far, is attentive and driven, not to mention hes actually rly cute, but he makes me cringe ngl. like gives me podcast nigga energy a lil. idk

well tmrw i have an interview for a job that pays a whole lot more than what im making right now, so i really really need it to go well. my hours are already being cut at my current job and i need to throw this two weeks notice in this weird ass bitch's face to heal my soul.