#idk what yet but I will write something

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."

[voiice-of-the-soul]

It irritates me alot when people say that making medic more compassionate is ''missing the point of his character'' when he is literally shown to be in the comics.... did you miss the part where he showed concern for both sniper and miss pauling's well being in comic 5 and 6.

His actions are a combination of genuine attachment + clinical interest and these things do not cancel out one another. He is always pushing boundaries and going against the grain and i think this is what led to him losing his license in the first place. He felt stifled by the rules imposed on him.

He is shown to be extremely passionate so it makes sense that he would use his endless fascination with medicine as a way to show his affection. He loves his friends so he will find a way to make them borderline indestructible. Malpractice is his love language.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..

[arsenicflame]

It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.

At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return. 

It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.

Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug. 

“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.

(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)

By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.

When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.

Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”

And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”

That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.

[deoidesign]

Btw just want to be clear that Time and Time Again is set to, and will if I don't pause, conclude in May 2025!

Webtoon didn't want to renew or give me any extra episodes so I'm trying to work with what I have. I'm sorry it's ending sooner than I'd like, it's been difficult to come to terms with and challenging to condense my plans.

You deserve a solid conclusion, and I've spent months writing to try and reach that. If there's anything you'd really like to see before it ends, do let me know in case I can (and want to) fit it in.

I'd rather not work with them again, and I hope I won't have to! But coming off of years being overworked and underpaid does not make that easy, to say the least...

I'm doing my best, and I hope you like what I have coming up.

[aiktad]

"you don't actually take selfshipping seriously, right?" i do yeah. im holding the plushie i named after him. we're watching roblox video essays until my melatonin kicks in

[iris-drawing-stuff]

Whenever I get a new, interest I look at my favorite characters and go "Put their ass in prison," so here's Dmitry in Milgram.

Also, just for funsies, let's judge him. Imagine that Comfort Zone is his first trial song.

Some thoughts about this AU under the cut.

"Focus, channel and then discard

Now, sympathy has no place in a righteous heart"

The facility used Dmitry for experiments, and it's implied that part of that was killing other mutants. They would be his murder/s

Voting-wise, I think this could lead to an Amane-like situation where people vote him guilty to try to teach him that he was in the wrong. I'd like to think it would backfire just as badly.

I think the environment of Milgram would remind Dmitry of the facility. Milgram is basically one big weird experiment. The only upside for him would be the fact that Anya is there (IDK what her murder would be, but I am not seperating them).

Full body

Also, here's the other 2 ideas for his victim that I came up with:

1. Yura

"Keep barking all you want, cutting to the bone

You are like a cornered dog, cut the microphone"

In Convergence, he really wanted to kill Yura, and the only thing stopping him was his threat to make things worse for Olya. What if he was just a bit more impulsive and straight up killed him? I like this idea the least because we can't make Yura another prisoner if he's dead.

2. Katya

"Hey don't you realize...

That this life's not fit for the likes of you and I"

Okay... this is my most out there choice. Basically, when Katya gets captured and brought back to the facility, they kill her instead of whatever they do in canon, and Milgram considers it Dmitry's fault because he abandoned her after they escaped. It's kind of similar to that theory that Kotoko's victim is Lucky because she abandoned her at the end of Deep Cover.

[lunarharp]

i wanted to put these four together chatting, cooking, dancing, and trust

[jesuis-assez]

Popping in with another #Chenford Chat! We know The Rookie likes to throw in little winks or callbacks to previous episodes. What do you most hope to see a parallel to at some point?? 👀

Brace yourself, reader. I'm going in-depth with this one.

And then going off topic to eventually come back around to the question 🤭 Talking points outside of the question are: the different dynamics they've had + doors.

Trigger warning: Partial mention of 6x06 break-up + gifs (for those of you who are still traumatized 🤣) or still affected by it, as a result of personal circumstances (which I understand whole-heartedly)

1. I would like to see a callback to Day of Death ft. the necklace Tim gave Lucy.

But, I'm not going to hold my breath for it 🤣If they were to ever do anything similar to that… I'd be over the moon. If it does happen... The legend was foretold in this post. Apart from the aftermath of it in episodes: 2x12, 2x14, 2x17 and 4x17 .. we barely acknowledge its existence.

We get small glimpses of it every time Lucy touches the tattoo (Tim's words echoing on her fingertips as she lingers over the writing) and I clock it every time she does it. ESPECIALLY when she does it around Tim, or when it's about Tim. The person who helped her view that tattoo\traumatic experience differently. He is the reason she kept the tattoo. D.O.D was such a significant episode and I probably won't ever stop eluding to that.

I've said this before somewhere on a post (I think) that @thesassywitchofthenortheast made some time ago. I'd link it in a cute (x) but I can't find it 🙃 It'd be a nice way of them finding their way back to each other.

The necklace instead of the ring this time to lead Tim to Lucy.

It feels like it's something you're more likely to see in a fanfic (That I would probably propel myself to write, for I have grown tired of them wrapping that storyline up and never mentioning it again, when there is so much more they could

tell or do with it.) Especially with everything they've been through and how different their dynamic is now. I don't think it met its conclusion yet. Not if Lucy keeps touching that tattoo. But, who knows? fanfics have come to life before. Maybe I can manifest this into existence, too 👀🤭

The end of 6x10 also has SO MUCH potential, though. The feeling of it bringing their story full circle with Lucy being the one with her walls up and Tim having the role of lowering the walls by returning her kindness. * Fingers crossed * that they really deliver this new beginning. 'Cause that would be one mighty callback.

As exciting as it was when they eventually got together in 5x10 and we got to see them as a couple and watch that unfold. Watch that transition of them growing into romantic territory. I feel like this could be everything that journey wasn't.

'Cause don't get me wrong... The moments that we got? I'm happy about. I really am. I'm not at all ungrateful. We just missed a shit ton of their relationship. Almost like it got glossed over. Like, what do you mean we didn't get to see Tim's reaction to her having kept the D.O.D tattoo?

Picture Tim's small doses of kindness that Lucy allows + mutual pining + what their relationship could look like with them coming home to each other. What that reunion could look like after those moments of kindness and mending. Because Tim isn't expecting any of that to happen. That's not possible in his mind, he ruined that. But, he's still hoping for a second chance to mend what he broke.

That chance to really show her how much he appreciated that beacon of light she gave him in some not so bright moments in his life. Because she was at the centre of so many of those right from the beginning of their journey. From the moment they met and were Rookie\T.O to each other, she was in the midst of his past issues. She saw him through those. My mind has now made the leap to 6x06 - the break up. Lucy being at the centre of something from Tim's past again and Tim trying to keep her away from it. That's a whole other topic, though. I won't talk about it here 🤣

There wasn't much of a build-up in terms of the pining arc. It was just 4x22 - 5x08 They just danced around it. Perhaps, it seemed as though it didn't need to be drawn out? If that's the case.... Well, I would've liked it to be drawn out a little more or at least more of it being explored in those episodes during that arc. But, I wouldn't trade those moments we did get, for anything.

If we take into account the different dynamics they've had + all the tropes... You can see their journey. How far they've come. You're able to see a build up there.

( Which is where I am kinda going with this )

Rookie\ T.O [ & them becoming friends through-out that ]

That shot of them looking at each other in 1x01? Ooh. It has that feeling of something about to brew from this. Something beyond their understanding. They have no idea of what's to come from this, of how important the other person is going to be to them. How this will grow into something so beautifully tangible. And that jaw clench from Tim... Even that has growth 🤣

Friends (during the aforementioned above)

The romantic feelings gradually stirring up within them through-out and otherwise being unaware of due to many factors. i.e Tim's suppression (king of suppression) and not being in the place (given what their relationship was) to weigh-out the gravity of those feelings and how deep they are. And unless therapy helped with that, I'm willing to wager that he could still be in that state of mind to some extent.

In terms of when those feelings started to shift, it definitely already had evolved by the end of their dynamic as Rookie\T.O

That barrier between them coming down , despite those feelings having evolved while the barrier was present. Those feelings existed, while she was his rookie. And I don't know if he acknowledged it or is aware of that much, hence my use of the "Unless therapy helped with that, he may still be in that state of mind to some extent" Or if he even allowed himself to accept that. And I don't know whether the show will ever make that known or if it'll just be left to interpretation, that's how I interpreted it, at least.

[x] <- I made a gif-set that focused on this a bit, awhile ago. Shameless plug 🤭

Sergeant\aide

Feelings realisation \ Pining :

Tim did acknowledge and come to accept those feelings rather quickly after the kiss in 4x22. That kiss really opened the door to those feelings that he buried, all that was left was his mind coming to terms with it. The almost kiss in 4x01? the catalyst to opening that door. The spark. Just needed that kiss to open his eyes, for him to completely walk through that door. That door being Lucy's door in 5x01 and the door in his mind that was closed to the idea that there could be something more. It brought all those feelings back up to the surface for him to finally address them, in place of him just having those feelings. Feeling what he does for Lucy and not allowing his mind to determine what he's feeling.

After the kiss, he couldn't just repress the feelings down again, like he had always done, nor could he deny it the way he had after the almost kiss. Now he has that awareness that he felt something from that kiss and that's hard to deny. And it's that same thing he felt, after he comforted her. Only this time... he can't shake it. Even more so, while you're undercover and you're meant to be 'pretending', except it's not pretend and the flood gate has been opened and all your very REAL feelings are pouring out.

He closes the door to those feelings and himself in 4x01 and then walks through the door to Lucy in 5x01.

He gives in to his feelings this time. The way Lucy went to and he didn't give in the way he wanted to.

He stared at the closed door longing to go to her, but didn't give in to that desire, unlike he did with Lucy opening the door to him in 5x01. Just like the story she told of their undercover doppelgangers. He was very intrigued with the " I opened the door for you" answer she gave, too. And he lingers there, because he 'shouldn't' want to come in, but he does. It's written all over his face, how much he wants her, wants to be with her.

5x01 was his mind doing back-flips, trying to connect the dots and wonder where these feelings came from. He was THAT unawakened to these feelings, even when they were emerging during 'day of death' and while she was undercover in 3x14. That same episode he was undressing her with his eyes in her green dress.

He gave in more than once (honorable mention):

That WHOLE episode was them giving into their feelings and feeling them under the guise of this is ' work '

[ Relationship upgrade - Them getting together ]

End of relationship - Exes

New beginning - ???

- [ B a c k - t o - t h e - q u e s t i o n ] -

I don't want them to be put together without building that up, of telling that story (them finding their way back to each other) There's so much history here. And to circle back to all of it? One mighty callback. I want to see Tim mend what is broken through being there for Lucy, the way she was for him at the start of their foundation. I want to see him earn Lucy's trust back. I want to see that unfold. And I'd like for it to be told by calling back all those moments that shaped that beautiful foundation. That friendship.

I.want.to.see.that.journey. You know? 🤣 'Cause it'll look hella dumb and albeit… incredibly disappointing, if they don't show that after ending season 6 on that footnote. I mean, they had small moments of angst before 5x08 came around, but I don't know…I wanted to see more of it. It's what makes them getting back together all the more satisfying. Ideally, It'd be great if they work on their individual issues, as well. Since those issues were affecting their relationship, it wasn't just Tim's issues.

2.) Perhaps Tim is training his assigned rookie… he's getting blasted with reminders of when Lucy was his rookie. Which would be a good way of reminding the audience (Like we could forget the early days) of their foundation. Also showing just how broken it is now. Not just how BROKEN but how IMPORTANT. The contrast of what was and what is now leading to what could be.

And since I talked so much (wasn't anticipating on doing that) about doors. . .

3.) Doors. 🚪🤣 That'd be neat.

Thank you for sending me this ask ^_^! This question was fun to answer. Very thought-provoking. When I first read the question, I only had one thought in mind: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( This has been my go-to response for things lately )

After sitting with the question for some time.. I eventually came to this essay ✌ (Does anyone actually like reading these detailed responses ? 🤣 Be honest. )

[jadecantcreate]

had a Thought about skrimm/barnabos (offhandedly mentioned very light/not plot related spoilers for eps 1 through 8)

so obviously barnabos has his thing with the woman in the shell right? calling her lover and all — it’s very clear they’re in a romantic relationship. it feels to me like it’s also kind of a warlock-patron or follower-god dynamic given her nature as some kind of otherworldly being (giving barbabos boons/abilities, appearing as fish, etc)

so imagine when barbabos catches feelings for skrimm and realizes it…how could he betray his lover, his muse, his goddess, even, like that? what would she think if she knew? she’d abandon him, certainly, and she would be justified. what is he to do? i mean, he might just be reading too deep into it and it’s just friendship. that comforts him a bit. but a part of him knows what he feels and it horrifies him. he loves the woman in the shell and devoted himself fully to her. but was that love anything more than admiration now? when had his romantic feelings for her dissipated and weakened enough to let someone else in? and skrimm, lazy slacker and sleazy conman skrimm, of all people? maybe if he can convince that nagging part of him, neither skrimm or his lover will learn of this sin, and he’ll forget all about it. he’s not sure he can. he tells himself it’ll pass eventually, as all things do and manages to believe it

and skrimm would react similarly, too. it just started as a joke by queenie and him exploiting a loophole (and barnabos’ assumption of him meaning well) to not do any work…he should’ve known to keep his guard up, to stop himself from getting too close — closer than he already was to all of them. in such a dangerous situation, attachment was a disadvantage. sticking together and being friends benefits the party, of course. more people, more skillsets, means more chances of survival. but love messes with skrimm’s head, and he’s not the smartest already — who’s to say he won’t sacrifice himself for barnabos’ sake? its a scary thought, and its even scarier that he doesn’t have a strong aversion to the idea. he has to get rid of these feelings somehow and he will figure it out…hopefully

[mixtapedoh]

vernon as highschool crush pls for lonely boy 🧍‍♀️

vernon my bestie beloved bastard ♡ you really are requesting for the people, lindsay.

;༊ — lonely boy

pairing: hansol vernon chwe x gn!reader genre: fluff, high school au word count: ~3.3k warnings: language, mild threats among friends, a lack of originality (but perhaps ameliorated by an understanding of the conventions of trope?)

olive's notes: firstly, hahaha.......... pretend like this wasn't something you sent me actual months ago.... and pretend like i gave the prompt the justice it deserves....... shhhhhh, i answer things in a timely manner and can still be considered a tumblr writer. secondly, this is quite glaringly based off of and colored by my memories of high school, so expect United States education system nonsense <3.

☄. *. ⋆ hansol vernon chwe x high school crush.

— the hardest thing about crushing on this fucker is that he's everywhere

simultaneously the biggest cryptid in the whole student body (if you had a nickel for every time your journalism teacher asked: "has anyone seen hansol this week?" to absolute crickets you'd be able to pay for at least 2 years of college) and also the most social person to ever grace your high school halls, hansol was everywhere all at once, and contradictorily, nowhere when you sought him out.

you wanted to avoid seeing him because of something embarrassing you were sure he had noticed? bam. right there beside you, sitting on the same row of auditorium seats for the assembly.

you wanted to catch a glimpse of him while the both of you were assigned to photograph the basketball game? viola. gone, nowhere to be seen; and yet your friend will tell you later that he was there the whole time, snapping the best photos of boo seungkwan's legendary 3-pointers (which you certainly hadn't missed, so where had he been??).

— yes, having a crush on hansol vernon chwe was exhausting. there was no way to save face — trust hansol to be there at your worst hours (like that chemistry presentation where the color palette you used for your PowerPoint was too light for the old projector screen to show properly, and so you half of your graphics were unreadable, inspiring your professor to dock 10 points, despite that fact that when you pulled it up on a computer screen - or any other device that wasn't an old ass projector at least 15 years out of date - the graphics were just fine and the detail above required). it didn't matter the specifics of the occasion, it was simple fact you'd always somehow manage, in your darkest moment, to look out and see hansol — always a kind smile, with something encouraging in his eye, despite, but still horribly, embarrassingly, and irrevocably present.

— and then, as it if weren't bad enough, hansol vernon chwe had the absolute gall to be unbothered, unfazed, unable to be rattled or shaken in any way, by comparison.

oh sure, you'd seen him cringe before at him friend's (mostly kwon soonyoung's) antics; you were familiar with the way vernon expressed any and all emotion with the whole of him — his every muscle tensing and twisting in a way so visceral and real, you could feel embarrassed, too, by just looking at him — but the envy was this: it was never at his expense that such feelings would arise. vernon was never embarrassed because of something he did or caused or felt. his life was far too chill and unbothered for that. others could be embarrassing around him, but all of his actions flowed so smoothly — rolled over the shoulders of everyone else.

the closest he'd ever get was doing something explicitly stupid just for the enjoyment of others. but, the catch was this: they enjoyed it !!!! it was funny and not cringe worthy !!!!! the net effect was positive.

it was infuriating. sometimes you weren't sure if you wanted to kiss hansol or strangle him with your bare hands.

— but let's take things back to journalism.

— because of course he took journalism.

not exactly the most exalted of the journalism students or anything, hansol was mostly known for his opinion piece articles and, of course, availability and willingness to go to any school event to take pictures and help fill in the blanks of the article anyone was writing.

he had friends in any and all school functions and events. from sports to musicals, science fairs to choir recitals, you could say, "is anyone going to this very obscure and random FBLA presentation?" or "did you know that the coding club is going to be attending an event at another high school this saturday?" and hansol would immediately perk up, pull out one of his headphones and go, "yeah, i'm gonna check it out. did you need a ride?"

— and it was because of that — his being everywhere, inescapable and offhandedly thoughtful, open and so easily warm — that these pesky feelings even started, in the first place.

— just when it happened is perhaps inconsequential (in all actuality, it likely started before your journalism daily exposure, just slowly, more of an itch at the back of your mind than the brash insistence it was, now) but it was definitely the fault of journalism. maybe that band and orchestra festival in 11th grade where you went with hansol to do a write up on all the high schools attending (placing undue emphasis on your high school's multi-talented band leader, lee jihoon, who could play half the instruments in the room), or maybe that series of debate tournaments you both covered in 11th grade, or when the two of you took over the baseball column that same year and when the heatwave spiked early, vernon would attend each game in sleeveless tops, always with an extra ball cap in tow since you would (conveniently, perhaps?) forget one of your own and the sun made it impossible to see what was happening, beyond.

yes, just when it hit was neither here nor there, because at the end of the day, the problem remained: you were hopelessly down bad for one hansol vernon chwe. fuck.

— and you couldn't escape him if you tried.

and trust me, at one point, try, you had.

— after all, at the beginning of your senior year, you somehow ended up being in the same spanish class as him and his friend joshua, and after a whole year (and subsequent summer break, when your journalism teacher found an opportunity to have a section of the city newspaper be dedicated to "the youth of journalism," and weekly, your journalism club was able to publish in the city newspaper) of crushing on hansol with a vehemence perhaps concerning, you knew you couldn't handle having to have embarrassing debates, conversations, and role play scenarios with him.

in perhaps two weeks you were in the counselor's office, exploring alternate class blocks. in the end, you were stuck in a ceramics course instead of your preferred electives, but at least when the unit on "la familia, el amor y todo lo interpersonal" came up, you were role playing as a couple alongside jeon jungkook, who couldn't stop making you wheeze with laughter from his overextention of the r at every available chance, rather than your crush, hansol.

(all it would have taken was one "te extraño" from hansol through your fake hand phones to absolutely floor you. someone call the school nurse, you're fallen and perhaps can never get back up again.)

— so you avoided him there, and even before that, during your junior year, you had mostly eaten off campus on your second schedule days when you and hansol had the same lunch hour and the risk of running into him at a time potentially embarrassing was at an all time high, seeing as nowhere was safe — the social butterfly he was, hansol managed to have business in every hallway of the school. not a single area was risk free.

yeah, junior year really had just been a mess of emotions you hadn't wanted to name, and so instead, elected to pointedly ignore. you were glad to say that while spending your hard earned money to eat out 2-3 times a week was a bit of a low, you had solidly moved out of that phase of your life by spring that year, and could stomach the risk of Being Seen by someone who had captured your attention so strongly.

and yeah, even though you had a bit of a backslide when changing spanish classes senior year (which could be chalked up to self-preservation, truly), you had solidly moved past that whole Avoidance Stage of your Crippling Crush on One Hansol Vernon Chwe.

— so hansol couldn't be avoided. that much was abundantly clear. and you had to interact with him in journalism and (god willing) be normal while doing so, and luckily, while all that exposure didn't exactly desensitize you to his overwhelming charm, admirable confidence, infectious smile, endearing jokes, comfortable aura, and oh so beautiful eyes, it had forced you to just,,,,,,, accept some things.

— accept that you had a raging crush on hansol, but that it could be managed... so long as none of your mutual friends found out.

— you were pretty sure that wonwoo knew, but at least he was ✨subtle✨ and generally checked out of things like that. genuinely, he could not care less, and so he made it no one's problem. you could probably tell him your most rancid, vulgar thoughts, and he would just file it away in his mind as: "nasty shit i can never unhear" and go about his day. compare that to your other mutual acquaintance, seungkwan, and well...

— but for the most part, it seemed that senior year was inching away, another year with a crush on hansol, and another year where you didn't say a damn thing and refused to leave anything close to a hint for him to pick up on.

— but mercy didn't exactly exist for you, now did it.

— the horrible series of Epic Fumblings and Incriminating Moments began in october, when hansol and joshua decided to make a podcast to convince the school that an AV club could be a fun addition to the roster of School Sanctioned Clubs (an idea they really should have had back in august

— the horrible series of Epic Fumblings and Incriminating Moments began in october, when hansol and joshua decided to make a podcast to convince the school that an AV club could be a fun addition to the roster of School Sanctioned Clubs (an idea they really should have had back in august — you know, when clubs were first getting registered and students were accosted in the hallways with club information slapped on astrobrights with strong ~graphic design is my passion~ presentation)

they had needed someone tech savvy enough to get them the podcast equipment and teach them how to use it (and just,,, do all the technical aspects for them 🥺👉👈 pwetty pwease 🥺👉👈 we're just silly boys who want to talk about random shit but are trying to pass it off as being Constructive in Some Sense so that it looks good on college applications) and so obviously their search had sent them in the way of wonwoo, who only seemed to have free time on the exact day and time you two would joint study for your college level government and politics course.

so of course he asked if the two of you could move your study sessions to a different location (he swore he could multitask? okay overacheiver) so that he could both study with you and help the stupidly handsome hansol and joshua with their brilliant podcast idea.

and of course, you'd forget the first time and wonwoo would conveniently not answer his texts for 20 minutes, allowing for the most embarrassing stage of him finally picking up his phone (on speaker?) to you yelling "jeon wonwoo, i will personally castrate you and throw it in the ocean so you can be eaten alive by the creatures birthed from the subsequent sea foam if you don't come to the library to study right now. i have been waiting for 20. minutes. where are you?" and hansol and joshua would hear you. and have the gall to laugh.

and of course wonwoo wouldn't even give you the grace of not having to show up to his house (your new study location) to study for the day. in fact, hansol gave him the brilliant idea of threatening to train an eagle to peck at your liver daily - not eating it fully, just put in it's beak and twist the flesh. since you can't grow another liver overnight, of course. don't you just love mythological punishment.

(and that wouldn't be the end of the embarrassing podcast adventures, either. the time shua cajoled you into being a special guest????? truly, you dodged a bullet not being in spanish with that fool. he's impossible to refuse and the worst of it was that he knew it.)

— or what about the december gift exchange in journalism?? that was certainly not your finest moment, trying to get chaewon to change names with you so that you could gift something to hansol (something lady luck had never granted you despite all the blood, sweat, and tears you sunk into this journalism group of yours), and he heard you, mid-conversation.

seungkwan had told you hansol had been talking about it later, and you quite literally saw him connect the dots in slow-motion as he recounted the story. "y/n, do you have a crush on hansol????" it would have been bad enough that he practically yelled the accusation in the stands of the football field, but then he had the gall to triumphantly gasp and break into hysterical laughter upon your clear embarrassment at being caught. it was during lunch! you're shared lunch break with hansol! who knew where that fucker was! he probably saw the whole exchange!

(in the end, chaewon didn't change names with you (she traded with some other journalism traitor so she could gift to sakura) and even though hansol didn't have your name, he got you something regardless, saying it was thanks for putting up with he and shua stealing wonwoo during your (once peaceful) study sessions. you had decided against getting him a gift regardless, and so you had to awkwardly seek him out during winter break to shove a poorly wrapped box in his hands, with a mumbled apology for your tardiness in gifting, something he pushed away cooly, as expected (but were those red ears of his from just the cold, alone?).)

— and then, well, once everyone came back from winter break and seungkwan knew of your crush on hansol... school became less a Place of Learning and more a Viscous Time Loop of Shutting Seungkwan Up Before He Spilled The Beans.

kicking him under the table. threatening his livelihood. slapping a hand over his mouth on one occasion because seungkwan couldn't take a joke and his retaliation of choice was calling over hansol right there and then and forcing you both to awkwardly sit in the bitter soup of Revelation.

— and then there was february. oh, february. how easy it is to loathe february.

— it was already hard enough getting through the embarrassment of valentine's day themed fundraising — every year, your literature teacher (who oversaw the student body officers — that first exposure to the cruel reality of rigged elections, a popularity win if there ever was one) offered extra credit for students who volunteered time to help the sbo's with their silly little business venture of "roses for $3, sugar cookies with shocking pink frosting for $2, heart suckers for $1, sonnets written by the creative writing and theatre kids for $7.

every year you volunteered for some reason or another - maybe your grade needed it, maybe you were doing sbo president seungcheol a favor because no one signed up, maybe you were following the stupid advice of seokmin and were doing it for the plot (code for: please don't leave me alone at the stand, i will buy you all the sugar cookies you'd like, just don't consign me to spending my lunch break in this particular layer of hell in solitude). this year was no different in you signing up to do time, but seungkwan sure was different, asking you every day if you managed to see if vernon sent anyone something (he had — soonyoung had convinced him to pitch in to send jihoon 16 sonnets, to be read aloud in the middle of class). if he had sent you something (he hadn't).

but when you got an anonymous rose sent to your 2nd class of the day, with a cryptic note attached, your friends wouldn't let you live it down all week. (who had sent it, though? they would have had to be very strategic as to when they placed the order — you had certainly never seen one for yourself in your daily exchange of goods, and seokmin was suspiciously tight lipped about the whole thing (very uncharacteristic of him — who had the ability to buy dk's silence, and better yet, how had they done it???)).

— yes, valentine's day was bad enough. but to add to the mix was always hansol's birthday. last year you'd gotten him a gift since you had worked quite a lot together during that month, and it just felt... normal. comfortable. something kind to do that wasn't weird in anyway. but these days, facing hansol was almost as embarrassing as it had been during junior year when you avoided the mere sight of him like seeing him smile would end in you contracting the plague.

as the day inched ever closer, you were seriously considering missing the day entirely. taking the day off. pretending to be sick. but that wouldn't get you out of seeing him the day after. and the day after that.

perhaps fleeing the country would be a totally normal reaction and solid plan.

— and then joshua invited you to hansol's surprise birthday party.

well. at least that cleared up whether you should get him a gift or not.

— to say that, at that moment and for the subsequent days afterward, were overthinking the whole thing would be to extremely understate reality.

you were about to pop a blood vessel over this shit.

wonwoo was invited, too (how charitable of them. making sure there'd be someone there to scrape you off the floor when you inevitably discovered the power of self combustion) and it was rather comical to see the two of you: cool and calm wonwoo, and you with the internal dialogue of WHATTHEFUCKWHATTHEFUCKWHATTHEFUCKWHATTHEFUCKWHATTHEFUCKWHATTHEFUCKWHA

all holding a cute little gift between you.

— and the surprise birthday party really was a Legitimate, 5-Star, Genuine Quality, Surprise Bona Fide™ - a success by all measures. a shock in more ways than one: a surprise for hansol who had no idea the party was happening in the first place, getting called over for what he expected was a casual videogame night; a surprise for lee chan, somehow, when he saw that shua got you to come 15 minutes before show time to help blow up balloons - a shock so big he started to say something with a wild grin and was immediately dogpiled by mingyu, junhui, and hoshi; a surprise for all the friends amassed when you proved to be quite adept at party games like their incredibly convoluted version of mafia; and a surprise for you, later that night, when hansol offered to take you home

— the two you decided to stop at an empty playground before parting ways and see who could jump farther off of the swings. he won by a wide margin, but you had the skinned knees to prove your effort and the memory of hansol laughing so hard he could barely breathe — his smile so wide it could've filled you completely, banish any longing from your chest for a moment of unique closeness and bliss — and perhaps that was a consolation prize, enough.

but then you and hansol were on the swings again, seeing who could tighten the swing chain the most and spin the longest, and between the motion blur, you heard hansol admit defeat and when the swing stopped, his face was all too close to yours to shrug off as friendly, and his hands were holding the swing chain on either side, and when he spoke soft and low to crown you the victor, you kissed him.

and the biggest surprise of the night was when he kissed you back.

☄. *. ⋆

blog home

[fishareglorious]

Me playing chess against a 12 year old with the intent of killing her friends: Yeah i'm a total grandmasterpilled chesscel. I'm basically going chess mode and i'm giving checkmatecore vibes My subordinate Z, chief of staff: Vice President I think God should kill you

[sourscratched]

the hand that feeds

[aloonaram]

Here’s an edited wip of my Birdflash oneshot.

Fair warning, this will probably change in the final product as I try to figure out at what point in the timeline I want this fic to take place.

“You look like shit, Dickie.”

“Gee, thanks, Walls. You’re such a loving boyfriend,” Dick retorted. He tried for a smile, but Wally watched sadly as it twitched and fell before it could become what it once was–what Dick’s smile used to be.

Dick opened his door wider in invitation and Wally rushed in and examined the place. Gotham wasn’t ever known for its beauty, but even with that in mind, Dick’s apartment looked pretty rough. Empty containers of takeout and miscellaneous trash littered the floor and countertops. His couch was sprinkled with brown spots that he almost assumed were polka dots before he realized they were most definitely patches of dried blood. Clothes were strewn across every surface, their musk permeating his senses. Dick brushed past his side and made his way to the kitchen, opening his rickety fridge to expose the meager amount of food he had. Wally would bet his life savings that each of the five items had gone bad too, based on the state of the place.

Dick turned to toss Wally a water, “So…what, uh, brings you here?” Dick’s awkward tone hangs heavy between the two. Now that Wally could get a good look, his lover was in rough shape. Even worse than his apartment; which was a feat, his mind whispered. His hair laid limp and greasy along his neck and his bags seemed to have bags of their own. A couple of dark bruises peeked through the collar of his shirt, some leading down to his left arm if the strange way he seemed to carry it was anything to go by. Dick clutched his own water bottle, doing his best to look anywhere but at him.

“You haven’t been responding to my messages,” Wally started, “I texted the other Robin, uh Tim, I think? But he never got back to me either, so I got worried, you know? Figured I’d take matters into my own hands. I don’t have super speed for nothing.” He waved his hands around, doing his best to lighten the mood. “It’s been a long time since we’ve gotten to talk, let alone seen each other in person, but, you know, if this isn’t the best time, I can totally leave. I know this is kinda spur of the moment.” Wally wished he could slap himself the moment his lips stopped moving. Some of the younger heroes had started calling him a professional yapper and he wished it didn’t fit so damn well.

Wally watched as Dick took a breath and rubbed his temple as if he had a headache. He winced. Yeah, this probably wasn’t the best time to show up out of the blue.

“No, I…You don’t need to leave, “ Dick sighed. “I’m sorry I haven’t been responding, Walls. Everything’s just been… a lot, to put it simply. I’ve been so busy trying to balance my day job, Bludhaven, and…and being Batman. I just haven’t had much time to myself lately, if you can’t tell by the state of my apartment.” Dick laughed pitifully and winced when it shook his aching arm.

He couldn’t help moving forward into the kitchen and enveloping Dick in a hug, something he definitely should’ve done the moment he’d arrived. His partner sighed shakily and moved to wrap his arms around Wally’s middle. He felt Dick’s face pressed against his chest and hooked his chin to the top of his greasy head. Dick had always been one for physical comfort, a miracle considering who he’d grown up with and the environment he’d been forced into at the ripe age of nine. Wally would be lying if he didn’t say Dick’s need for physical affection didn’t bring him relief and make him feel needed. Sometimes, he felt powerless amidst his lover's strife–Batman’s rule against metas in Gotham limiting his ability to help. Providing Dick a simple hug; feeling the tense muscles in his shoulders loosen and his breath hit Wally’s neck as he sighed in relief, was Wally’s respite from his perpetual guilt.

Wally knew about Batman’s…death. He’d been there when Dick hosted Bruce’s funeral, letting Dick squeeze the life from his hand as he listened to the speech from Alfred. With Bruce gone, the natural order of Dick’s family had seemed to fall apart. Dick had taken the mantle of Batman, a title Wally knew he had never wanted–never felt right for him. He’d be lying if he said he fully understood the magnitude of such a change–that he knew how large the chasms carved by trauma had grown to separate Dick and his siblings. And yet despite that, he knew one thing for a fact. Dick, his lover and the man he’s known for well over a decade now was not the type of person to let others shoulder pain on their own. He took and took and took until he knew only he carried the weight of the sky on his shoulders, letting his muscles feel relief only when his family no longer felt pain. And he’d continue to carry that weight with a smile as long as he knew his family would smile back, unaware of the sky creeping in on Dick’s tense shoulders.

Wally squeezed his arms tighter around Dick’s back, supporting him as his breaths became ragged in their silent embrace. As Wally did so, a sick thought entered his mind, fueled by the anger and pain he felt for his partner; a small part of him–microscopic even–was glad Bruce wasn’t here. Not because he reveled in the effects his passing had on Dick, nor because he wanted Dick to be forced into the role of Batman, but because despite his struggles, Bruce had never been good for Dick. Yes, he played the parental figure Dick needed when he was younger and yes, he provided the necessities for Dick to survive, but he never provided what Wally knew Dick needed most.

“Do you wanna move to the couch, babe?” Wally whispered, cheek pressed against Dick’s head. He feels Dick nod silently and Wally zipped them to the couch in less than half a second. Wally sat and patted the spot next to him, watching as Dick laid his head on his lap, pressing his cheek to Wally’s stomach while letting his legs hang off the side of the couch.

Never one comfortable with silence, Wally broke it first. “If you don’t wanna talk, I won’t push. We can chill, watch the Office, eat popcorn–whatever you want. I just worry…you know? Not being able to be here to help and hearing on the news, Batman and Robin this and Joker and Two-Face that…I just wish I could do more for you.”

Wally looks down to meet Dick’s pained stare and internally winces as Dick opens and closes his mouth, struggling to respond.

“Me and the bats have it handled over here, okay?” Dick starts quietly, aimlessly running his hand over Wally’s knuckles. “You don’t need to worry about me, honey. I know you have more than enough to deal with back at Central and I don’t want to stress you out with problems I have handled.”

Wally lets his free hand run through Dick’s hair, quickly relishing in the way Dick warms to his touch. “I can’t lie and say I wouldn’t be stressed, you know me too well for that, but I’m here to support you, Dick. To be your listener when you’re stressed.” He paused for only a moment before speaking again, “I know you, Dick. I’ve known you for almost every era of your life as you have, mine. I knew you when you were my scrawny, baby leader-”

“Hey-” Dick tried to interject, but Wally kept going.

“I knew you when you wore that god awful blue and yellow disco Nightwing suit-”

“It really wasn’t that bad-”

“And I know what it looks like when you don’t have things handled. You don’t need to soften the blow for me Dickie and you don’t need to play the perfect soldier.” Wally paused. Let it be known even the Flash is out of breath from time to time. “You were always there for me during rough times, so please let me be there for you.”

[queenaeducan]

anyway, when all is said and done i still think the the veil coming down could've done more for veilguard's themes than the actual end if handled a certain way

[ppeachybees]

UNFINISHED COMIC !! from … last year. i started a fic for this a while back too, but couldn’t figure out where to go with it. here’s just some good ol Kageyama Parents Comforting Their Child content for now