#idk maybe it would do certain people some good to know that not all abusers are obviously abusers from the start

[seventeendeer]

deltarune theory #99999, the game's a timeloop and the reason Ralsei knows so much about what is going on even beyond what the prophecy says is that he has (probably vague) memories of previous timelines. saving and resetting are major themes in Undertale, and there's clearly something significant about Deltarune's odd savepoints and how they relate to the Titans' faces looking like giant savepoints. plus there's the evasive save text of "you are filled with a certain power" deliberately alluding to but not directly mentioning determination the way Undertale savepoints do.

this could relate to other theories in a number of ways, including: - Ralsei and Kris are scheming when the player isn't looking. they could be talking about previous timelines, if they both remember them to an extent. they may have been secretly trying to manipulate the outcome of the prophecy from the start to prevent the tragedy at the end from happening, or just do damage control. - Susie has taken Noelle's spot as the third hero, which is why she's constantly going "off-script." maybe Ralsei and Kris deliberately drew her into the role for some specific purpose. - the Knight is either Dess or Carol. maybe attempts to prevent disaster in previous timelines failed because of Noelle finding out that the Knight is either her beloved missing sister or her mom that she's terrified of. Susie may have been chosen to replace her because she doesn't have those personal connections. and maybe because she's defiant and strong-willed, unlike Noelle, so she would continue to fight back no matter who the Knight turned out to be. - Kris stole the red soul for some specific purpose. maybe Ralsei and Kris have already gone through timelines where Susie is the third hero and it's still not enough to change things, so when Gaster (or whoever) summoned the red soul for some other purpose, Kris stole it to use for their own plans. this would explain why the player can start from any chapter; Kris can go through the story without us just fine, but they need us for the ending of the game. their only hurdle is that they have to strike whenever the red soul shows up, and then pray that it doesn't go off the rails before the end.

there are also a lot of holes in this theory, such as Ralsei genuinely seeming inexperienced with people at the beginning of the game, and needing to learn to overcome his personal demons as the story progresses in a way that implies he hasn't been through all of this before. on the other hand, it would also explain other character details, such as Kris taking Susie's abuse without so much as flinching at the beginning; if they already knew her from previous timelines, they'd know she wouldn't actually seriously hurt them and that the two of them would eventually be friends. Kris' strong emotional reactions to remembering Asriel could also relate to whatever happens when the two reunite at the end of the week, whether good or bad (or maybe they know they won't reunite with him for whatever reason - they may have been stuck in a timeloop without him for god knows how long and in their mind they connect escaping the timeloop with one day seeing Asriel again).

there's also the suspicious way Susie talks about wanting every day to be the same as the last, and the game allegedly only having one ending. Susie could actually get her wish in a painfully ironic way if the timeloop keeps going, and getting to an ending at all might be the game's "golden ending." going the weird route or any "incomplete" neutral routes cause Kris and Ralsei to force a reset so we're blocked off from the ending, and only playing through the equivalent of Undertale's true pacifist route and getting everything just right will have the characters happy with the result and allowing the red soul to move on so the game can end.

idk this theory doesn't hold up under scrutiny in a lot of places, but we also don't have anywhere near all the pieces yet, so who knows! very interesting to think about at least !

[deepseasmetro]

i mean, i don't even necessarily disagree with you but i feel like your argument is flawed? i really am coming at this with good faith but like. looking at images of drugs online (watching breaking bad) does not make you more likely to know drug dealers or do drugs, because its a physical object you have to have to acquire in the real world, and you are only looking at pictures on the computer. but when it comes to csam, the crime IS looking at pictures on the computer (of real children). so i can understand a lot better why looking at pictures of fictional children in sexual situations on the computer might put you in communities where you are a few clicks away from looking at pictures of real children in sexual situations, because the action you are doing for the crime is the exact same and much more accessible. and i'd imagine that people who want to look at csam would probably also be interested in drawn images approximating csam, or use that as a gateway entry point to meet people with similar interests who can send them real csam.

like i dont think lolicon should be called csam or that women who are into lolicon should be unpersoned and harassed endlessly, but also "well watching breaking bad doesnt make you do drugs does it" isnt a strong enough rebuttal for that point because of the fundamentally different nature of the behavior.

i just feel like you are severly underestimating how popular lolicon and lolicon-like content is among certain groups of people, much more popular than actual CSEM. like a significant amount of lolicon content isnt even actual porn, its shit like eromanga sensei or dragon maid or oremai or onimai or whatever! like idk even the fact u think lolicon = porn is like. i think showing how U (and most people!) dont really know much about this subculture and the people within it.

like yeah, yknow, im also sure theres some people who are really into anime guro who find it easy to find irl gore to look at, but generally people are looking at the animated and drawn stuff because..... well........... that's what they like. it is not a fucking "gateway drug" like people could just go and find CSEM, as you say, easily! so why are they not? maybe because they dont... want to? maybe because a fictional depiction of something is just different from the actual thing?

i'd imagine that people who want to look at csam would probably also be interested in drawn images approximating csam, or use that as a gateway entry point to meet people with similar interests who can send them real csam.

and hell, maybe youre right, but like - thats right! you imagine! we dont actually have any data on this, because of how hard this would be to study, right, so like - whats the point in pontificating on this instead of actually discussing the real material realities that lead to CSEM being created (which is that children are very easy people to abuse and exploit for money) instead of trying to figure out if people with horny monogatari figurines are in cahoots with child abusers.

like even ceding this ground with "well it might be true tho" is just giving fuel to the fires of people who want to act like lolisho content is a step away from being a child abuser. you cant say "well we shouldnt harrass these people tho" and then go "buuuuuut well they might be friends with pedophiles you know". i just dont really agree at all with your base premise that these are two communities with significant overlap like i really dont believe that from my own experience lmao.

[henrysglock]

Do it! Talk about all of your Catholic Henry thoughts! I’m intrigued! (You just know that he had the nigh universal Catholic Kid experience of being terrified that he was fundamentally evil and would go to hell for not being good enough or ‘normal’ enough.)

Yes...Yes.......

If Henry had had a "normal" childhood (read: no lab, no shadow), he would have been an altar boy. Absolutely, no doubt. Also, Henry...just wait until you find out that the "no homosexuality" thing was actually about men sleeping with boys, not men sleeping with men. It'll be so freeing. And you know he abuses that confessional 😭 Bro's in there like "Father I have sinned. I cheated on my math test not because I didn't know how to do the math but because I was bored and wanted to be done with it so I could go back to doodling comic book characters."

"Father, I have sinned. I talked back to my mother today. And like...I don't regret it? Idk she had it coming, maybe she shouldn't talk to me like—anyway. I know I'm supposed to honor her and my dad but how am I supposed to do that when she's so controlling..."

And the poor priest is there like yeah, yeah. Say the Hail Mary 5 times and apologize to your mother. You only got 3 years of this left, kid. I got bigger things to worry about, like whatever the hell Rob Newby's got going on. You're better than the other kids. Have you seen Lonnie Byers? Get out of my confessional you've been here 3 times this week for small potatoes.

Henry (like me) would get so bored in mass that he starts wondering how the hell anyone changes the lightbulbs near the ceiling of the church, or how much damage one of the fixtures would do if they fell. Or when the last time was that they were dusted, and how much of a fire hazard that is. Or he starts admiring the stained glass and misses his cue to stand/genuflect/etc. Bro starts reading the lyrics in the psalm book to entertain himself.

Hot take: Henry "homosexual, autistic, has psychic powers" Creel very much considered priesthood. He saw his lack of attraction to women paired with special abilities and went "Ah. I'm called to the faith. Might even get canonized if I do enough funky things". And then he realized the larger church fucking sucks ass, and he had to "take a break" from it all.

Thus I feel like Henry would grow up to be a (generally) non-practicing Catholic. Like he doesn't really go to church, save for Christmas and Easter, but when some fucked up shit happens in his life his first instinct is to either pray about it or start going to church again. And certain psalms do still hit hard in an emotional way. Also, he absolutely judges the folks who weren't raised Catholic but who convert and immediately start proselytizing...like no, buddy. You're in the wrong church. We sing some songs in Latin and pray for mass to be over because our knees are killing us. And then we host charity drives. Why are you saying so much while doing so little. Go back to the evangelicals. Do not come to my town.

OH. And. Henry "altar boy" Creel absolutely got roped into drinking the non-blessed church wine on a dare at least once. It was probably Walter who issued the dare, but all the other kids hang around to watch it happen. It was so bad that he coughed a little and got wine all down the front of him. He also definitely tried to figure out where the hell the church gets its communion wafers from because that shit's tasty as hell to the autistic palate. Speaking from experience, lol.

Which. Veering off topic a little, but I want to talk about it more. With Henry's abilities and his general goodness/tendency towards self-sacrifice for others, he'd be something of a shoe-in for sainthood. The kid can give visions, levitate objects, read minds...revive people, even, if El's thing with Max is anything to go by. Give me St. Henry, patron saint of the scapegoated. Right now.

[spicyrouletteburrito]

Am I gonna finally make a post analyzing Bam’s character? Maybe

I’ve actually been wondering cuz there was exactly one time I decided to check out Naver/the korean ver of TOG and the comments were: probably the cruelest I’ve seen? It felt like a cesspool of hate where everyone was complaining about something or the other and it was so bad that I was legit thinking how on earth does SIU continue writing if all his comments r about how awful his writing of Bam is or how everyone only wants to see Khun and that they dont care about the effort he puts into his art

But anyway after reading that Ive been thinking for months that I want to actually sit down and study Bam’s character a bit as a fuck you to all the hate

I do have some issues with his character which I def talk about below but i can assure you Im not gonna be just hating on him

Actually this is gonna be really long so I’m just gonna start linking them in different posts

Spoilers for anyone not caught up on the webtoon

Lets talk about the positives first or like moments where it felt like Bam really is putting his money where his mouth is

He’s choosing to ignore FUG’s fate for him and chooses paths that will keep his loved ones closest to him - I think its incredibly admirable that he does this knowing that FUG’s goal is to overthrow someone who in the Tower’s eyes is hindering growth, is needlessly cruel(Workshop Battle Reflejo remember losing his eyes and his family just for accidentally(or not) looking at a Princess comes to mind, Traumarei wiping out entire branches of his family if he didnt like them), is a tyrant(Idk what else to call Jahad after that whole thing w the Hidden Grove and Sir u cannot just ‘declare’ urself King one day and then start killing people when they disagree). Back to Bam, its incredible and I think a good thing to show of someone choosing a path of their own than just listening to the cries of people who as even Urek said, have nothing to do with him. That sounds horribly cruel but hear me out: Bam doesnt know ANYTHING about the Tower when FUG takes him, what he knows is that his friends are being held captive and FUG is behind it, FUG is doing this because they cant kill Jahad themselves. I am beyond 10000000% certain that if they had just explained to Bam from the start and never put his friends on the line that Bam would have been happy to help them fight Jahad. We have seen Bam go out of his way to help characters for no reason beyond his own sense of compassion and empathy(literally the entirety of Tower of God/Bam sticking his neck out for Traumarei and Gustangs family members and telling the heads to stop fucking with their families lives) those families asked for help but note that none of them were holding Bam’s friends as hostages. Laura Lo Po Bia just ASKED for help, she didnt do anything to pressure Bam to help(if I remember correctly). If you want another example we can just look at Bam vs White in the Hell train w Bam saving Whites comrades.

If FUG hadn’t fucked w Bam’s friends, they WOULD have had a willing Slayer Candidate but they didnt.

I like that Bam walked away from Fug after knowing why he was being forced to train under them as I read it as Bam leaving his abusers behind. CUZ THATS LITERALLY WHAT FUG DID TO HIM, Bams whole fucking personality changed thanks to FUG, he himself hates the ver of himself that FUG turned him into. I dont think I need to elaborate on that, we got the Hidden Floor arc to prove it. I point this out is cuz a thing abusers do is raise the stakes so you feel morally obligated to stay, eg: abusers trapping women by forcing them to get and stay pregnant saying that its best for the Child. What FUG was doing was essentially that in part so Bam choosing to leave and fight to leave is an incredible showing of fighting for your freedom even when your abusers keep making it sound like ur the worst person alive for leaving. Also, they took Bam and clearly dont touch Urek, they took Bam who was literally brand new to the tower, had no time to assess the Tower for himself and make even his own fking personality, they literally took Bam at his most vulnerable AND impressionable for a reason. Bam was weak and didnt know how hsi powers worked, he’s kinda perfect for the job, you dont see them doing anything like this with Urek because they know it would not work with him. Bam was kinda the perfect victim, so yeah I think Bam rejecting FUG is fking perfect even if it does come at the price of the Tower staying under Jahads reign, you do not solve abuse with MORE abuse, ESP when there WAS a way to get Bam to naturally help.

Bam leaving FUG was one of the strongest displays of his Values and I will die on this hill okay?!

Anyway thats enough FUG bashing lmao FUG is still cool but yeah theyre real fucked up

Once I have other posts out I’ll link them together(i also gotta learn how to do that)

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/749333039047442432/httpsolderthannetfictumblrcompost74884185043?source=share

Sorry, long rant incoming.

Someone in the replies said it, but I think it needs to be said again where everyone can see it: I think a lot of the attitude that anon is somehow secretly pro-censorship because they think certain preferences are skeevy, and strenuously insisting that bad attitudes can NEVER be media's fault.... idk, maybe take it out of the context of debates about sexually explicit/pornographic media for a moment?

There are works of media that had pretty direct effects on activist and political movements, good and bad. Uncle Tom's Cabin inspired a lot of people to fight against slavery. The movie Birth of a Nation, which showed a history of the U.S. with the KKK as heroic, is considered by most historians to be a major contributor to the revival of the KKK in the 1920s. The Nazis used films, books, music, art, and so on in their propaganda, knowing it would help their ideas go down more easily. The Soviets did too. Every dictatorship did. Even democratic countries have done it as well, usually but not always in more subtle ways.

Do none of those count, because "oh, people who were going to be convinced by Birth of a Nation would be racist anyway"? "Good, non-racist people wouldn't be convinced by it"? I mean, the latter is true: there were plenty of people, especially black Americans but plenty of white allies too, who boycotted the film at the time. The NAACP led a boycott. But do you really think NO ONE was convinced? (What about people who previously didn't feel any way about it one way or the other? Were they just innately more evil, even if it might've just been that they weren't aware? Do supposedly progressive people in fandom realize how much this sounds like Christian original sin rhetoric...) And does it matter purely about media fully changing minds, or also how it galvanizes people who already think one way? If it gives them new talking points, new ways of thinking about it and convincing others? If it helps them believe their cause is more important and worth fighting for?

So why does this all suddenly change when we're talking about sex? Is porn really this special class of media where somehow all the rules about how we can both like things and also be critical of how media (fiction, news media, whatever) influences us - "be critical of the media you love," as a tote bag sold by Feminist Frequency said - just stop applying for some reason? Or maybe if something is bypassing your rational brain entirely and going directly for the pleasure centers, there's all the more reason to think critically about what it's saying? Propaganda is designed to bypass all that, too.

Also, if media really has NOTHING to do with it, that just wouldn't explain why it's disproportionately anime that feature these specific elements that seem to attract more people arguing for why it's wrong to be upset by rape or child exploitation in real life. I don't believe that everyone who watches slavery isekai or lolicon approves of those things irl - I think for the vast majority of people, it IS a fantasy and that's the point - but I have noticed that in places like the Anime News Network or Crunchyroll forums, the comments become a cesspool of creepy people arguing for why ages of consent should be lowered and mean feminists who don't like watching media with rape in it just need to get over themselves, in a way they just don't when you're talking about Attack on Titan or My Hero Academia or Shoujo Romance #4891 or whatever.

As another person in the notes said, abusers ARE opportunistic. They'll use something like Twilight as easily as they'll use the most uwu, soft, "non problematic" ship to argue for why they're allowed to abuse you. But I don't think that means we can't be critical (not calling for censorship, of course! but like, writing op-eds and stuff) of media that makes their arguments a little easier, maybe even directly makes their arguments for them.

You can believe both that everyone has the opportunity to read, watch, listen to, play what they want and make up their own minds about it, and that it's wrong for the government to ever decide what media is and isn't "acceptable," and also believe that media often is saying things that aren't apparent on the surface and that you should be critical of those messages, *especially* with the stuff you like.

The point is just that porn isn't like, fundamentally different from other fictional media in this way. (Or, hell, I would argue that fictional media isn't functionally different from other mass media in this way. If anything, fiction's politics are often more insidious in a way that makes it easier for them to reach people who might not otherwise be open to those messages in the form of, say, blatantly right-wing news media.)

It's particularly strange to me when people jump all over someone for expressing how something can be insidiously creepy in a more mundane way. The line people are upset about that used the word "unpack" was just making the point that even if we can agree lolicon isn't outright advocating pedophilia, even if we agree the point is that it's a fantasy and they're not like real children at all and that's what people like, it's still working within an idealization/fetishization of helplessness, innocence, and dependence, and that still has a lot that you can critique from a feminist perspective. It's still a thing that plays into some crappy societal ideas about who women are supposed to be, and is selling that to men as a romantic ideal. There's still a lot we can talk about there! And it's still totally fair for women to be wary of men where that seems to be all they're into - because for some (and I believe this was what anon was initially trying to say was their experience), it does impact how they treat real women. It doesn't have to be everyone for it to have an impact.

There's a lot of anime that presents women that way, even way outside of lolicon. A lot of it's anime I like! I'm still critical of that aspect of it. I still wish that particular part of it were different.

I still don't see how this makes me "pro censorship" unless I believe some kind of institution should mandate that that not be included. And whether that's the government, or the industry itself (people do kind of narrowly focus on "the government" in a way that would make a lot of industry-run censorship that was still very harmful, e.g. the Hollywood Hays Code, not "count"), or anyone, I very much disagree with that. Creators should be able to create what they want. A lot of what creators are doing with this is unconscious, is reflecting societal biases they learned but haven't thought deeply about.... which is precisely the point of critiquing how those show up in a work.

People love to talk about "secretly 'anti' attitudes" but at the end of the day, support or opposition to censorship is pretty straightforward. You believe someone should be stopped from making a particular kind of media, or you don't. If you don't, you're not pro-censorship, no matter how much you personally may not like that that media or a particular aspect of it exists. Most people who care about media have some media they wish didn't exist. It's about what they do about it that makes them pro or anti censorship. Talk to people who donate to or even work for the ACLU or other anti censorship groups; most of them don't like racist or sexist stuff, but they also don't believe it should be banned and that's the point.

Bringing it back to the discussion at hand, I think the point was just that you can't be blind to how power dynamics influence this stuff. I wouldn't even say specifically cishet men are at fault here, since some people who read this blog seem to think that anyone saying that is automatically talking about bioessentialism as opposed to like, societal stuff (don't ask me why, this has been explained on here enough times in enough different discourses over the years, I think). I'd just say anyone with power in that particular context. There's a reason why it's specifically mainstream media, aimed at groups in power, that tends to draw in creeps excusing the real thing... in a way that just similarly is not true of people in fanfiction fandom, who are usually a member of one or more oppressed categories, exploring that in their own marginal work. Fans of rape fanfiction just don't act the way that fans of slavery rape isekai do. It's because there is fundamentally a difference both when you're someone whom society tells you are entitled to everything you want in this particular arena, and also when a work is mainstream, broadening its reach, and speaking a particular message from the lens of people with economic and social power (who are making these mainstream works) and given approval by publishers/media studios/etc. in a way that is not the case with amateur work with tiny audiences. And, frankly, there's a difference between something that eroticizes rape from the point of view of the perpetrator vs. the victim.

Not a difference in terms of how legal it should be. Not a difference in whether every single person who watches it or likes it is bad. But a difference in terms of what it's saying, how it's saying that, and often the effects they have as a result. That, too, is true with every topic, not just sex.

I feel like a lot of people getting mad at these do fundamentally agree with this, but just have a weird blind spot when it's put in any sort of terminology that reminds them of certain bad arguments they've seen in fandom, uses any words that can be dismissed as "radfem" or "anti" or whatever, and so just refuse to engage with the actual meat of what is being said.

If you do actually believe though that it's wrong to EVER think media can have a negative effect on what people believe about irl issues, because there was always something "already there" that was going to "come out anyway" if it affects you that way (again, people: this is "original sin" rhetoric), and if you ever privately judge people for the media they like you're secretly pro-censorship. You do have to recognzie that both you personally come up short and also most peopel doing real concrete real world things to fight censorship would also come up short!

I think sometimes of an editorial that said "if you love Return of the Jedi but hated the Ewoks you understand feminist criticism" in terms of how you can be bothered by the sexism of a piece of media in a way you'd be bothered by any one individual element of it, and still overall like the whole. And also, you can be offended by something, even wish it didn't exist (don't we as nerds all have entries in some franchise we like or another that we wish didn't exist for fannish reasons?), without believing that it should be officially made to stop existing or have never existed in the first place. That last part does actaully matter as like, its own thing. It is in fact separable from just being able to have personal judgey feelings about media and about the people who liked it.

And opposing it does not mean in any way that we have to just stop thinking critically about the media we love, or that we have to act like media can never have any influence on people. We on the left tend to talk about sexism, racism, homophoia and so on as being influenced by culture and society. Well, guess what is part of society and culture? Fictional (and other kinds of) media. That's part of that societal programming we get. It's why you'll see some of it even from people whose parents very much tried to resist teaching them certain things, because they get it from media anyway. I was raised by strenuously feminist parents: it was the media that taught me what gender roles were and how I was expected to adhere to them.

--

Look, I realize it's a bit rich of me to say this, but people are not going to engage with your actual points if you cannot be more succinct.

[kaddyssammlung]

I want to just type a little / TW as usual because when I just type then it's not because I feel great / my BPD is doing its thing at the moment so it's BPD talking and not really me if that makes sense

I feel useless.

That's pretty much what's going on.

Every now and then I hate everything that I post. I feel like it's too much and I should not post at all. No one would miss me but I know that that's not true. I post something and a few minutes later someone else posts the same thing and then these people get more notifications or notes idk the English word in German it says “Anmerkung”. So I delete my post again. I mean why post something at all?! I get that everyone hates me....(yet I have so many followers and I'm really grateful for that). But also I'm an asshole....I can't shut up about certain things. People don't get me....it's always been like that. I want to change my pinned post and make it sound more positive but I keep failing at rewriting it. I am sad little f*....mentally ill and getting better but still struggling every now and then.

Sometimes I ask myself if I shared too much personal stuff?! Maybe I should have kept everything separate? Sleep Token one blog and Ka being an abusive f* c*nt because that's what BPD does to you....what was I talking about?! Yeah the other things put into a different blog. I thought about that last year but then I decided not to do it. I'm just being be and some days I am not okay and I don't want to hide that.

I hate things still bother me so much. With BPD everything feels like a personal attack. Even when someone makes me a compliment then I turn it into an attack / see it as being criticized.

People liking my posts = me feeling not good enough and hating myself because I feel like they only like it because they pity me People don't like my posts = sorry to bother everyone....let me grab something and “punish” myself with it...I know that I am burden.....

I keep asking myself: Why do I even keep posting at all?! I like blogging...I always have and also I really like Sleep Token.

Mister Vessel on my right side next to me ( two small posters of him)....idk....Every now and then when I feel to mentally ill to be in this fandom I stop for a second and remember Vesel's bare arms and his belly and I just know. He really fought to be here . And I am so thankful that he is here.

I keep trying to live what Kerry says “shut up and be love” XD....”shine baby, shine”....f*ing light...I am f*ing light. So in a sense I am fighting to be here as well. But here for me is more this planet in general.

I don't even recognize myself anymore. When I think about the mess that I still was around that time last year compared to now?! That growth....but also the lows.....those damn lows....

Whatever...at least now I don't feel like punishing myself anymore....so....

I pick up my guitar now and play and then do energy work.

If someone actually read this...thank you. I'm fine....sometimes it's just....idk...BPD

[pineforestfox]

HAVE SOME OPINIONS ON ZABA:

Long-

Flip:

GREAT SONG, 10/10, I feel like it's actually a rlly good intro to the album. It's intense, probably to make the listener listen to the rest of the album which is smart. "I was in full bloom until I met you, I'm gonna shake my feathers. I'm breaking loose" seems like it's implying abuse/manipulation in some form tbh. "I wanna go back to a face, no more mask" they're tired of having to hide how they feel/of walking on eggshells. They're spreading they're feathers and leaving, breaking loose. Powerful and the music just makes it sm better.

Zaba and Cosmo sheldrake's music have a similar vibe tbh- except Cosmo Sheldrake is Yonkagor abt fish (basically like rlly interested in/has a fish or ocean refrence in most songs/albums)

ALSO LIKE EVERY SINGLE SONG HAS A REFRENCE TO FEATHERED WINGS/BIRDS?

Black mambo:

"Slow down it's a science, he's been waiting to bring you down. Snake eyed, with a sly smile. We can hold you, and shake you child" GIVES ME CHILLS. another great song!! You kinda have to listen to it on full volume at night by yourself for it to hit better than it usually would but OH MY GOD ITS SO GOOD. It's probably referring to drugs, 'its a science [...] Waiting to bring you down [...] Snake eyed with a sly smile' It's a science (makes you feel a certain way), waiting to bring you down (that eventually leads to a downfall) snake eyed, with a sly smile (it's got you. It's got you in it's grasp and is smug about it.) We can hold you, and shake you child (it's got you, it's holding you. You can't leave. It shakes you, shaking someone usually makes them feel dizzy and/or powerless) this song is just wow ngl, rlly good but I can see it getting dismissed by someone if not listening to it in the right conditions

Something about most Zaba songs is that they aren't exactly a 'casual listen' most of the time, the meanings are so deep and complex that it feels like a crime to take lightly (for me)

OH ALSO, if you listen to the full album in succession, until you've listened to the songs separately/listened multiple times you might not know where one song ends and another begins. It's very good at blending the songs together

Pools:

Not as much to say about this song, it was one of the first Zaba songs I listened to though. I like the song, alot. I have however seen people's theories on the meaning and kinda agree kinda disagree. It definitely seems to be about a good/loving relationship gone wrong, perhaps due to the singer only smiling because he wants to. I feel the line "open to a world of noise" IN. MY. SOUL. A world of noise is very accurate, but I feel it probably has some deep meaning and I'm taking it too literal. "I smile because I want to, I smile because you want to" probably means that he's smiling because he knows his partner expects it, maybe he's decieving his partner with his voluntary smile somehow

Gooey:

I gotta say, I liked it alot more the first time I listened to it. I relate to the "I can't take this place, no I can't take this place, I just wanna go where I can get some space" alot, it's how I feel VERY often. The song sounds like overstimulation. Perhaps they're drunk? Idk, but for me it's more like this being is sensory overload and is struggling to cope with having to do this. "Truth be told, I've been here I've done this all before" they're fresh out of the womb, and already overwhelm feels familiar. They're probably in constant stress or going to develop some form of anxiety if it continues. "I say 'I told you so' but you just gonna cry" (foreshadowing) They said "I told you so" they predicted whatever happened to the one who's crying (anxiety, overthinking about the future). Anyways singer is upset and overwhelmed as soon as they set foot into the world. There's probably more/alot deeper meanings than this but I feel one of the messages is: the world sucks.

Walla Walla:

THIS SONG. ITS ONE OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVOURITES. Ok first off, it starts with "I'm a little naked man" WHICH IS A REFRENCE TO GOOEY BECAUSE THAT ONE STARTS WITH "-my naked fool, fresh out of the icky gooey womb" SO THIS SONG IS A FOLLOW-UP TO GOOEY. Which is so yes because it's the next song in the album after it. Also "I'm a little naked man, I saw you there looking sad" it's the '-but you just gonna cry' person!! (I picture them as a young girl for some reason so I'll probably refer to them as a she) So naked man then goes "honey, honey, it's alright" and THEN proceeds to say "-these creatures are alive".. creatures. Which is another interesting thing because THIS WHOLE SONG sounds like a threat. A warning. There's danger. There's danger, we're in the jungle and there's threats everywhere. These creatures are alive. Alive and will get you if you cry too loud. Then he says "I clap my hands, and they're gone into the night" probably a lie, just trying to reassure/try to make the young girl feel better. The whole song's vibe is anxiety/stress inducing. Personally I've gotten STOMACHACHES and HEADACHES listening /info. It's a good song and definitely one of the best in the album imo. It's such a jungle vibe. THEN. THE BIT TOWARDS THE END. MY FAVOURITE BIT OF THE SONG. So the final chorus is playing, the music is more textured, alot more sounds and layers. All while saying "Take my hand" 16 times one after the other. Then there's an AWESOME instrumental, which just sounds like naked man had grabbed young girl's hand and is now running. Running from danger. Because there is danger everywhere. Take my hand, you will not survive. And in the instrumental you've got noises of wild theriform animals, in a threatening way. You are prey, run. And then he says take my hand 16 more times, in an almost pleading voice. A desperate voice. And the song is just a masterpiece. You have to have listened to it to understand what I'm saying but it's genuinely incredible. Again, not really a casual listen.

Intruxx:

Not much about this, again. It's just music. But the MUSIC is actually incredible. Throughout the song you can hear 'wa-walla, Walla walla' repeated over and over. It's another jungle vibe and I think it's after the events of Walla Walla (clearly). It very much sounds like an escape. I'm not sure, you'd had to listen to it to understand. It's definitely a transition song, but imo it's a very good one.

Anyways I'm ending it here I wanna scroll more

[mermaidslabyrinth]

I want to talk about OCs! Tell me something about Rhaegerys that you haven't shared yet!😃

I want to talk about OCs! Tell me something about Rhaegerys that you haven't shared yet!

Thank you so very much for this question. Just like anyone, I can prattle on about my OC about any subject. Some I may have to think a moment on others I have thought on a while and have answers ready to go. I've filled out three alphabets about him, 2 sfw ones and the nsfw one that floats around tumblr. They helped me figure him out more.

A forewarning: Rhagerys’s story is rather dark in certain areas. (Mental manipulation, emotional manipulation, physical abuse, incest that is not normal by Targaryen standards, probably other things I’m missing) I haven’t gotten to them yet in writing. But they’re on the horizon. Idk how it truly started but tbh if it wasn’t there, Rhagerys wouldn’t be who he is today. He more than likely wouldn’t exist beyond a thought and a few snippets. It’s the meat of his story and if I took that away it would be bare bones. Rhagerys is precious to me and his story means a lot to me. Rhagerys is the first OC that I have truly cared about. His story has a happy ending. It just takes a while for him to get there.

Now, I have a lot of thoughts of Rhagerys I haven't revealed. I wasn't too sure on what to focus on. I gave a few tidbits but decided on a topic I have hinted at a lot but haven't really gone into details.

Some are trivial like: Rhagerys would love to know what it's like to be carried princess style but at his height and weight compared to his siblings (and Aemond) he knows that will more than likely never happen. Although Aegon drunkenly does offer to try while Rhagerys is at King's Landing.

Others are part of the plot I have yet to reveal: Like why Rhagerys isn't technically “banned” from Driftmark, Rhaenys would prefer him not to visit.

While some are a bit dark and I don't think too many people want to read: Like a VERY dubious consent moment between Daemon and Rhagerys when he is 16. Which sets the stage to a moment in Rhagerys's life that changes him. It's debatable whether it's for good or bad.

With Rhagerys there will be times you love him, strongly dislike (maybe hate) him, pity him.

Love: Like when he plays with the little children of both families. When he gets his siblings and cousins to play a game of a mixture of tag and hide and seek. When he helps/coax Aemond doing things with him that Aemond refused to do publicly (play tag/hide and seek, dancing, genuinely smiling/laughing)

Hate: Like when Rhage uses the same manipulation tactics on Aegon that Daemon used on him. Or during Luke's funeral Rhage was laid up recovering from an injury and he cared much more about having sex with Aemond than his stepbrother's death and the somber event that was happening elsewhere on Dragonstone.

Pity: Like when one dinner he refuses to eat the lamb, he hates lamb and goat, so Daemon makes him sit at the table until he does. About an hour and half later Daemon sees that Rhage hasn't touched the meat so he makes him go to his chambers. Where a little later Daemon appears with the now very cold lamb and makes Rhage finish his meal. After he does Daemon promises Rhagerys that he doesn't have to eat lamb or goat again.

But I settled on something I haven't talked about at all. That is his time at King's Landing with the family in 134 AC (fifth month to seventh month) when he is 18. So I can show little highlights that will make it into the story while others will either be one shots or just part of the outline never to be seen by anyone but me. I mean the outline of their time at King's Landing is 25 pages in my word document. Here's a very abridged moments.

Again, my story goes by the timeline I created.

Also in my story Viserys isn't as sick as he is in the show, I use the book version of his health for my story. However, those three months he does go down hill.

The reason they go to King's Landing in the spring of 134 AC is for two reasons. The first is to celebrate the “defeat” of the Triarchy in the Stepstones and the Stepstones becoming a part of the crown (again for the time being). The second is because of Vaemond using that time to strike and get to be named as Lord of the Tide instead of Luke since Corlys hangs between life and death during that time.

But mostly this:

Daemon is a petty bitch about why they’re there and will be very cunty the whole time during their stay.

Anyway, Viserys has a month long celebration for the victory and for his daughter and her family coming to visit after six years. Many of the prominent Houses attend. Including some of Rhagerys's Belmore family comes to visit in Lady Jeyne's stead. The Houses show up about a week later (around day 10).

The family still have the dinner like in the show but the little tiff doesn't make the families split again.

Here's Little Highlights From Their Time:

Day 9: Rhagerys has sword matches between Cole and Aemond. Rhagerys unnerves Cole by smearing his own blood down his chin and neck. Bites the man and wins by “fighting dirty” as Cole says. Rhage and Aemond go for a bit but Rhage wins by improvising. That helps the spark between them grow more than it already has.

Day 10: Rhagerys and Aemond have sex for the first time

Day 11: There is a midday feast where Rhagerys dances with all the eligible girls of the prominent Houses between the ages 7-13. That night he dances with the eligible ladies of the prominent Houses between the ages 14-20. All times were for the Houses to put their daughters forward for consideration for betrothal to Rhage. He is quite tired by night’s end.

Day 12: The royal family have mid morning/lunch together. Rhage plays with the five young children and gets run RAGGED by them. That's where Rhagerys and Jaehaera get “married”.

Day 18: Masque ball. After the dance, Rhage gets Aemond to dance with him in the privacy of his chambers, to stand in the rain with him, have sex in the rain. Rhage sees Aemond without his eyepatch for the first time. Because Rhage wanted to earn Aemond's trust and respect.

Day 23: Viserys asks Rhage about the tourney that will be held for 5 days. Daemon states that Rhage will enter the one-on-one sword fight and the lists. Unknown to Rhage.

Day 27: Rhage makes it to the finals of the one-on-one sword fight. His opponent is Gwayne Hightower. It's an even match, with Gwayne just having the upper hand, until Gwayne reveals something to Rhage. Which makes Rhage, well, rage and dislocates Gwayne's shoulder. Winning in a dubious way.

Day 28: Rhage enters the lists. In the fourth round a man from House Royce is knocked from his horse and wants to continue the challenge. The man says something that makes Rhage absolutely lose it and black out. I won't say what he does but it's not pretty. He makes it to the finals of the lists and wins. He crowns Jaehaera as the Queen of Love and Beauty. He is also knighted by Viserys. And gains the name “The People's Prince”.

Day 33: Aegon gets Rhage, Aemond, and Jace to play “Boasts and Bluffs” (like Never Have I Ever). Rhage agreed as long as it didn't turn crass. He lost and Jace won. The punishment was that he had to be Jace's “servant” for the whole of the next day.

Day 40: A pivotal moment in Rhage and Aemond's relationship happens where the two become entirely devoted to one another.

Day 49: It's Rhaena's name day. Rhage organizes a play to be performed for her. There is dancing and merriment as well. Rhage takes Rhaena for a ride on Starsong the next day.

Day 56: Rhage gets roped into spending the whole day with Jaehaerys, Aegon, and Viserys. Playing games, with their toys, reads to them, takes the boys for a ride on Starsong, plus whatever the boys wanted to do. They talk him into letting them spend the night in his chambers. Rhage barely got any sleep because he would check on the boys every few hours.

Day 58: Rhage spends the day with Jaehaera since he did so with the boys two days prior. Plays games, dolls, reads to her, has a tea party, takes her on Starsong, had dinner with her.

Day 60: Rhage and Aemond go to an island (that is part of my story). Later that night they have a makeshift Valyrian wedding. It's not legal but that doesn't matter to them. They are forever connected, from that night on.

That's as much as I can give away. My outline is much more detailed but I don't want to write too much or show my hand. I have an outline created for each decade that the story takes place. Some are really detailed (130-150 AC time period) others are just highlights because they are not that important to my story.

[snowblack-charcoalwhite]

The way Condal, Hess and co write certain characters, especially Alicent, just makes them look like some kind of aliens who cannot comprehend the core of human nature and familial bonds (motherly love, sibling dynamic...) . I mean, fine, maybe they aren't parents honestly have no idea about their private lives nor do I want to know ), but that still doesn't justify the atrocious manner in which they have been portraying Alicent's relationship with her children. And I dislike the explanations that come from one part of the fandom (she married against her will, never wanted those children, never felt freedom...) I mean, I don't deny these, but they are not enough to explain or justify her weird (and sudden imo) detachment and dare i say, borderline hatred of her sons. Not to mention that this was the life of westerosi women, basically every one of them. Also, Ryan talked how Alicent and Viserys had "a loving marriage, just weren't in love " and generally holds Viserys in high regard, so he obviously doesn't see him as Alicent's abuser or anything. That's why i cannot understand what is the point of showing her so disgusted by her children and incapable of showing them love. Otto's influence? Maybe, but still not the greatest explanation. And she seems even harsher and distant to her sons this season than Otto ever was to her. She doesn't seem broken over Jaehaerys, she doesn't seem overly upset over Aegon (he's burned alive and is dying ffs and she won't shed a tear), Aemond is apparently an ireedemeable monster in her eyes fur some reason, even before RR... It's so frustrating that there are people who eat it all up and justify it as a genius and subtle storytelling with a lot of details that we "the whiners" refuse or are unable to grasp. Idk, I really liked her in s1 and although she was a bit inconsistent in ep 8 and 9 I hoped it would be retconed. Unfortunately, this season I'm watching a character I don't recognise anymore. And the worst thing is that she doesn't suffer from a lack of screentime like Aemond or Helaena do. Almost everything on tg revolves around her and yet I still have no idea what is her goal or who she is anymore.

Sorry for the rant.

Hello!

I could not agree with you more. Not sure if some kind of personal/family circumstances of HotD writers played a role in them fumbling the Greens family dynamic so badly but I am convinced that their "women good men bad" narrative policy did.

In "Driftmark" Alicent orders for Luke's eye to be cut out (and immediately, in public) - and then attacks Luke and Rhaenyra herself. But a few minutes (in show time) later she repents - and after that, apparently, she is all for "violence is reserved for men" agenda. That's where her disdain for Aemond (in whose name she was about to commit a public act of violence herself) is supposed to come from, I think. It doesn't even feel like she is horrified precisely by the fact that he might have almost killed (deliberately at that) his own brother. Lack of consistency and logic? Yes. Obliviousness at best, hypocrisy at worst (from Alicent, I mean)? Yes. But who cares, right? Alicent does not support the evil deeds of men - and that's what matters.

And her treatment of Aegon looks even more moronic. Girl, you put him on the throne against his will! After her meeting with Rhaenyra she knows it was a result of a misunderstanding (the favourite trick of this show, dammit - but it is a topic for a whole another conversation) but how is Aegon to blame for it?

I can relate to Alicent growing tired of being used and manipulated - but IMO (I agree with you here as well) this is not a good enough excuse for her to fully go into the "fuck yourselves, the lot of you" mode. But for the writers it is, at least it looks like it. They were trying to sell us the bullying of Aemond by Aegon (combined with the former's desire for power) being a sufficient motivation for Aemond to get rid of his brother (during the civil war where they are supposed to be on the same side no less) - and now they are trying to justify whatever Alicent does with her being a child bride and so on and so forth. I have no love for Viserys (or sympathy for Otto - where it comes to him pimping his teenage daughter out to the king) - but turning Alicent into this and expecting everyone to eat it up? Come on. Even some casual viewers are going "WTF" watching Alicent's scenes with her children, never mind those who are familiar with Fire and Blood.

And double yes to the point about the show very heavily focusing on Alicent to the detriment of many other characters (Aemond first of all). It feels like the writers believe that all that audience is supposed to know about Aemond now is that he is a bad guy - and they give him just enough screen time to show that. Meanwhile Alicent has loads of it - just so we could get a really good, really long look at her face and understand just how bad patriarchy failed her.

So, as I see it Alicent is now no more than a means to the end of hammering home the main idea of the show. How does she do that and what happens to her character in the process is unimportant - at least, to the writers and showrunners.

Sorry for the rant as well🙈

[robintherobiner]

This is an interactive story. The next part will be based on what you guys choose.

Warning, the story heavily revolves around dark topics, like suicide, abuse (all types), bullying, all that jazz. It's an au, HEAVILY canon divergent. So, idk proceed carefully

"If you're watching this, it means I'm dead."

Suddenly, Jason wished he'd never bought the sticker covered camera. He'd seen it in a charity shop, looking all lonely on it own little table. All the other camera were old, and had dents and scratches, but this one looked almost new and bursting with personality.

It had cost a lot, of course, and Jason had considered putting it back down. After all, he didn't need a camera. He was pretty sure Bruce had one at home anyways.

But then he'd seen a sticker, right under the shutter button, and he'd recognized his own costume. Whoever had owned this camera had liked Robin, his Robin, with curly hair and freckles instead of tanned skin and sparkly shorts. He had to buy it now, he thought, and so he did.

Jason pressed the play button again, and stared at the kid on the screen. He looked pale, and far too skinny for someone who, if his Bristol accent was anything to go off of, clearly had enough money to buy food.

"Sorry. I realize that was probably, like, a really big thing to say. Or, not big, I guess, it was only eight words. Tough? No.. Eh, whatever." The kid shrugged. "Point is, sorry. You picked up my camera though, so you have three options."

The whole situation is bizarre. He sort of assumed there would be pictures of nature, or videos of some cool tricks if the skateboard stickers are anything to go off of. Not a fucking death announcement.

Still, Jason is curious. Is the kid in danger, and thats why he thinks he's going to die? Or is he sad? Jason lived on the streets, he's not a stranger to people who's heads are clouded, people who think things will never get better. He's never felt that way personally, but he's known lots of people who ended up hurting themselves.

"First, you could just throw the camera away. A bit of a waste, since it's pretty good quality, but whatever. Second, you could delete everything on here and just use it yourself. I'd be okay with that. Photography is fun. Or, if you wanted, you could watch these videos."

Here, his cheeks flush, as though embarrassed. Its hard to hear, but Jason thinks he can hear the boy mutter something along the lines of what a dumb thing to say.

"Even though I'm going to die, I still sort of want to do cool things. Have a coming-of-age movie moment, you know? But I can't have one, so the next best thing is to try give it to someone else." Camera Kid paused. "I think coming-of-age movies are only for teens, though. It would be cooler if I, like, changed the life of someone who's already an adult. Cuz people my age aren't fully developed. That's shaping a life, not changing it. Changing a life would be much harder than shaping one."

Hm. Maybe Jason should give the camera to Dickhead. He's an adult, legally. Give the kid, whoever he is, his wish to try change a life.

Jason would never admit it, but he can't help but snicker. There's no way some random kid can shape or change a life. Especially not with a... Jason checked. Not with a one and half minute video.

"But if that doesn't happen, it's fine. Not like I'll know anyways. I like this camera, so I'll only give it away just before I die. Unless I come back as a ghost who's like, tethered to this camera, I'll never know if anyone watches these videos."

With those words, Jason sobered. It didn't feel funny once he remembered that whoever this kid was, dumb hopes aside, was clearly certain he'd die. If what he said was true, then he already was. That made Jason feel really bad for laughing, and even a little sick.

He'd seen dead bodies before, even his own mom's. He'd watched, smelt, and heard people die. He'd talked people off the ledge, both metaphorically and literally. But this? Holding the beloved camera of a boy who was most likely dead? It made death feel melancholy in a way Jason had never felt before.

"So, yeah. You have three options." The boy says, and reaches out to end the video.

Jason didn't know what to do. Really, he has four options.

[youremyheaven]

Your Angelina Jolie post is super interesting!

(Yapping incoming)

You briefly talked about her childhood and I think something interesting to add is that Angelina says she got called ugly when she was younger for her lips (I say that allegedly as I haven’t actually seen the og sourcewhere she says it). I was never super into the whole Claire Nakti punarvasu beast ugly to pretty video idea, as a native myself, *but* I do feel like it’s common for punarvasu to be called ugly/ experience appearance related trauma in childhood.

Either way I feel like I do see quite a few young Angelina haters who say she was ugly when young- even though us women of culture know she’s always been gorgeous- she did have a physical “awkward phase” in that sense of how she was widely perceived.

Also Maleficent is kind of a punarvasu core role when you think about it. Definitely some other major astro influence in the role as well, I’m not super familiar with her chart. However starting off kind, having someone take advantage of your giving nature, turning into a controlling and unkind leader, and then “returning to the light” by learning how to be kind again through love for a child who saw through the outer “ugliness”. Idk sounds a little punarvasu core to me

I feel like it’s frustrating to guess these things when someone has a planet in the first house which also rules one of the nakshatras, in this case saturn and pushya. It makes it so much harder to go off of appearance. For me personally I spot pushya women by their narrow but full lips (alongside the other traits you mentioned). The beautiful pushya moon native Tripti Dimri has this trait- her lips are full but their shape has a certain narrowness to them.

Going back to Angelina, as you said she has the pushya look anyway bc of cancer + saturn influence, but idk I’ve always felt like it’s a different vibe? The saturn nak women feel a bit more calm and “closed off” if you will(?)

Her having a Jupiter placement would explain this tbh. I’m kind of obsessed with her when she played “Corky”, whenever Jupiter (or mars actually) women do a masc look they eat it up every time!!

I thought Claire's Punarvasu video about ugliness was most relatable to Punarvasu men perhaps because men externalise their traits whereas women internalise them. So Punarvasu/Jupiter men playing the "Beast" made sense to me because they feel hideous and when it's projected outwards (our thoughts create our reality, when someone thinks or believes they're ugly they experience things that affirm this belief?? if that makes sense??) they are perceived as Beastly by others. Also Jupiter dominant people, be it men or women are hella intimidating as all these naks have feline yoni animals (cat, tiger, lion who are all unapproachable and intimidating in their own ways) I think if others are intimidated by you, they're less likely to approach you and if you feel socially isolated like that, you're more likely to think "oh it's because everyone hates me/because I'm ugly" and I think maybe that's why Punarvasu natives struggle with "feeling ugly". Claire did also say that being isolated was a big theme in their lives. It could also be because of how Jupiter's boundlessness means these natives contain too much substance, both good and bad, it's only with age and wisdom that an individual learns to tune out the negativity and focus on the goodness so because of all the internal negativity the natives "feel ugly". Another reason could be that having really turbulent and difficult childhoods are kind of part of the Jupiter experience, if you grow up feeling neglected or if you're abused, you're not going to feel good about yourself?? A lot of people who have childhood trauma also struggle with their self image. Kali Uchis, Punarvasu Sun, Vishaka Moon & Rising spoke about it in this interview about how being abused as a child meant that she hated being looked at or seen :(((

Angelina has mentioned that she hated modelling (which she did briefly as a teenager)

Omg 😳😮 I had never looked at Maleficent that way but damn that does sound very Punarvasu core especially since her own Punarvasu Sun daughter Vivienne was cast to play the young Princess Aurora because all the other kids were scared of her lmao 😭😭

Sleeping Beauty is closely linked to Revati/Pisces as well (She has Revati Moon & stellium)

You're right it is hard to determine bc of her chart 😭😭But Pushya natives imo have longer slimmer faces because of their goat yoni, Angelina's wide expansive face and features are giving Punarvasu 🤌🏼

But also I feel like Saturnian women are very comfortable with their femininity from the get go. They don't transform into it, like Angie did (which is a Jupiterian quality). Salma Hayek, UBP Moon, Madhuri Dixit, Pushya Moon, Miranda Kerr, Pushya Rising, Mariah Carey UBP Sun, Monica Bellucci-Pushya Moon are all Saturnian women who are known for their hyperfemininity. It's inherent to them?? They have this very exaggerated femininity (Pushya is considered the most feminine nakshatra) that I don't see with Angie. She's very poised and elegant now but I see her individuality before I see her femininity?? If that makes sense lol and like you said Saturnian women are 100x more mellow, more composed and overall chill, Jupiter is what creates a more bold/loud in your face kind of persona.

Idk what Corky is 😭😭😭😭please tell me I have no clue 🥹🥹

[liebgirl]

so basically i’m going to arizona on sunday so. my list of media consumption that must get done before i have to go on this fuckass vacation no offense vacation but like i didn’t even ask to go i didn’t plan this trip i’m being dragged on a vacation against my will lowkey. anyway. my list #mylist:

sharpay movie. we gotta wrap up this hsm rewatch before i literally forget. this has happened before i checked the receipts (letterboxd diary) i did exactly this in 2022 i actually watched the 3rd one and then didn’t close out the full rewatch with sharpay. now there were other factors contributing to this which we do not have to get into because it’s kind of a whole thing but my point is i haven’t closed out a hsm rewatch in four years and we gotta get this done this time

finish siege and storm. we are like. at a point where this is just silly. to be honest. girl you’re on page 355 of a 432 page book lock IN omg

i know i’m not gonna finish any of my tv show seasons in two days so i’m not even gonna try to say i’ll watch any of them

not necessarily a “by the end of this week” type of task but i do for sure need to make some more progress on superman summer. girl we’re lowkey fast approaching the new movie…. not that i’m gonna be there opening week be serious. i can’t even imagine anything worse than a movie theater crowded with superhero fans. no offense but i’d rather die….

i DO need to get my dad to commit to going to see superman with me though. i haven’t brought it up yet because it’s been too far away for him to care but now we’re probably good. he’ll go he always agrees when i ask him to watch a movie. which i have been known to abuse on occasion. i did make him see wonka with me… but you know what he did like wonka because wonka was a beautiful and whimsical film ok. but i did not ask him to come with his interests in mind that was a very “i don’t want to drive to the movie theater” situation much less of a “i think my dad would genuinely like this” situation… i did ask him to see dune because i thought he’d like it though i want us all to know i’m not always abusing my powers here…. he would also like superman my dad likes superman sort of. he likes batman more but no one wants to make whimsical and fun batman films so we’ve never seen one. bring back adam west batman!!!! i digress. my point is. about 85% of the time i only ask my dad to watch movies i think he’ll actually like. and that is a good enough percentage <3 although i did once try to make him watch. sharpay’s fabulous adventure. which made sense at the time. although we never did get to it. because i’m of course referring back to our first bullet point. see above! that whole incident was my fault though sorry dad…. in my defense. we did have the horrors going on at the time. anyway. he’d like superman he’d want to see superman. ok

start my book for vacation. i have three books picked out i haven’t started any of them but i feel like i need to start one so that when i’m like. on a plane and want to read maybe it won’t feel like such a gargantuan task to open up a book. you get me

as for media consumption DURING vacation. well i have my three books. you don’t know them so it’s not relevant to say their titles or whatever. they’re like normal books not fandom website books. anyway. and also i probably will be listening to my audiobooks too. gotta have the audiobooks on. honestly if my sister expects me to go hiking i’m pulling out the classic earbud and audiobook like what do you want from me girl… and i probably won’t get much tv watching done. or movies. although. it’s a family reunion there’s gonna be kids there and if i can get away with like. hiding out with the children to watch some fuckass disney movie indoors instead of sitting outside with my mom and a bunch of old people who don’t care about me you will catch me watching fucking. idk. encanto or whatever with the children… whatever kids are into these days i am not certain…

ok that’s the plans. xoxo love beth

[theerurishipper]

After learning about the leaks about Paris special, I just want to say that all of the comics and headcanons fans created speculating how they would be in emoverse are much better than what we got. Wouldn't it be ironic to say that they're born evil like Chloe in ogverse and that some backstory doesn't justify their wrongdoings. They are evil and very much proud of it with either their cringe worthy fails or terrifying terrorism

Agreed. Like, I don't mind the arc they were intending for with Chloe, I don't mind them showing that some people can't change, but then they'll redeem the terrorist/abuser. And they'd rather say that Chloe is just inherently evil without exploring or acknowledging the backstory and motivations they wrote for her. That's the issue here. And now Shadybug and Claw Noir are going to get some half-assed redemption. Honestly, I would have preferred them being evil, you know, like an everyone has a good and bad side in them and who you are depends on the choices you make kind of thing, especially since Miraculous is so fond of redemptions.

I get it, that's just my wish and the show doesn't have to follow my exact preferred storyline to be good, but the information we have doesn't paint a very promising picture either way. Considering the bullshittery of the Season 5 finale and Gabriel's shitty-ass redemption, it really just feels like this special is pushing the Gabe Is Good agenda in our face, you know? I mean, Guardian Angel? For the child abuser in our main continuity? The one who doesn't seem like he did a good job in the alternate timeline either seeing as his son was so unable to process his grief that he became a magical terrorist? This guy is called Guardian Angel? I mean, maybe he did his best, but we won't know until we watch the special, and the show has a habit of blaming Adrien for Gabriel's actions anyway, so. It just feels like it's pushing the "some people are good and some people are evil no matter in what continuity, and Marinette and Adrien are good deep down, and so is Gabriel. But Chloe is just always evil lmaooooo." I don't mind it too much, but shit's still kinda weird, man.

And like, what do you mean "Shadybug and Claw Noir don't even like each other?" That's kind of the whole appeal for a lot of people lmao, and they hate each other? I mean, I'm not going to judge it based on my expectations and say it's bad just because I didn't get what I wanted, but... really? And I'm also gonna go out on a limb and say Hesperia and Claw Noir have no personal interaction despite them being father and son and Adrien's motivation being to bring Emelie back. Like, at a certain point, it crosses the line from being my insignificant expectation to being just... bad choices and an inability to create proper payoff. I think Hesperia interacts more with Marinette than Adrien in this special. Getting major Season 5 finale-esque "Marinette replaces Adrien in his arc" vibes.

But I'm not disappointed, surprising as that sounds. I never expected it to be good. I was always just here to see Claw Noir on screen so I can properly pick him up and toss him into my fanfics. I was excited for the special, sure, but I didn't have my hopes up and the leaks seem to have proved me right. Idk, maybe they'll surprise me. I doubt it though.

Thank you for your ask!

[doukeshi-kun]

The original RE3 was short too but they did cut alot of stuff in the remake, like the choices you could make at certain points, Nemmy popping out out of nowhere instead of every single encounter being scripted and lots of locations being removed/altered just to name a few 😭 Aksdissdj I cant blame you, I thought Alice was Jill when the movies first came out! Then the second movie came out and I was like “Wha– But…Jill there…but….Jill….there? What…?” BUT THEY DID CARLOS SO WELL IN THE REMAKE, HE’S SUCH A CUTIEEE. “Now here’s a weird fucking door” WILL NEVER NOT BE FUNNY TO ME. THAT AND JILL’S LINE, “Bitch can’t even swim” Exactlyyy like please, just stand in the corner, we’ve got this man. But oh GOD, dont remind me, Im tearing up just thinking about that scene. The way Ethan says that line just…ooooo it just clutches at your heart and rips it from your chest. 

Amsfsdjf thats not fairrrr /j 

Apparently so, I think there’s like ten in total? Ajsfisjfi I totally get why. I wonder if alot of people thought that 😭 I adore Cheryl/Heather. She’s so sarcastic and has so much personality. James is a more fascinating character to dissect; Cheryl is more expressive and entertaining to watch (but also has a few heartbreaking scenes I won't mention cause spoilers hehe) …But she does look similar to Rebecca now that you mention it– 

Honestly….I feel like your take is actually pretty spot on. Yes, James did something completely unforgivable. It was the ultimate form of betrayal, no one should deny that. But in the same time, humans are complex creatures. (And props to Team Silent for making characters that are so human) James wanted his life back and probably even wanted to be free of the pain that came with watching someone he loved suffer. Maybe he even saw it as a mercy killing. He didn't want her to suffer anymore. Who would want to watch someone they love suffer the way Mary was suffering? But if this was as simple as a murder or a mercy killing, he wouldn’t have been dragged into his own personal hell. He wouldn’t have felt like he needed to be punished. He wouldn’t carry around so much guilt. Because he knows what he did was unforgivable and no punishment will ever be enough to atone for his sins. But James loved Mary, and she loved him too. That is undeniable. Yes, James may have had some impure thoughts about the nurses while Mary was bedridden and yes, he developed a drinking problem to cope with everything. But James wasn’t abusive or a rapist (I remember seeing such videos floating around when the remake was released/I looked to see if some people are still saying so and GOD there are some awful takes out there 😭) But I also saw someone accusing him of being a rapist because Angela isn't comfortable around him?? Like??? Did you just skip over her whole story??? But all that to say, James is an extremely grey character. He’s not good or bad, and I feel like that’s what makes him so human. Because real people aren’t black or white either. They’re not clear cut good or bad; they’re shades of grey. Omg really? I thought it was goofy 😭 But we all know the true ending is the dog ending 

Oh, and best wishes for uni!!

-💛

uni kills me my god /j

i have seen those rapist accusations and somehow angela was roped into it? like idk i feel like it's kinda disrespectful to her story and trauma. angela was uncomfortable because she's fucking traumatised 😭 i don't doubt that her discomfort around james stem from her distrust towards people in general especially because the one who abused her were people closest to her. she's literally stuck in a town filled with her nightmares.

i think james' character is well-written. it gives room enough for many interpretations of his human. the discussion surrounding his guilt kinda reminds me of a certain character...... 👀

speaking of ending, maria ending was... something💀 james, you're a fuck in that ending LMAO "better do something about that cough" OR WHAT UR GONNA KILL HER OR SUMN LMAO

[torialefay]

As someone who also has insomnia and severe sleep deprivation- I can tastefully say that 90% of the time I flick it is to solely sleep.

So yeah, it does help but you gotta go 2-3 times before you get exhausted enough to sleep ( at least for me).

So I wouldn't be surprised if Chris was the same and I'm for sure certain he has giggled and gone feral over the...

'No lube, no protection, on the kitchen floor, to the trampoline, against the washing machine, in the dirt, on the side, hands in front, hands behind, playing twister on the ground, in the drive-thru, behind the shower curtain, with the hot sauce, covered in chocolate ice-cream, slam against the windows, drool over the sink, bent into a pretzel'

Long ass paragraph ppl leave on Instagram and has the intrusive thoughts and being like-

I got something else to help me sleep again tonight haha

also the effort people make to write those long paragraphs and the creativity they have is insane.

Idk whether to be admired or scared for them.

first of all: i am SO SORRY. TWO TO THREE TIMES?!?! THAT'S HOW LONG IT TAKES YOU TO TIRE OUT?! i will never complain ab my life again, that really takes the cake i'm so sorry 😭 i would love to be able to say "omg relate so hard", but tbh i'm out as soon as my head hits the pillow... but if i get a good knut in, my brain is already turned off on my head's descent to the pillow. I'M SORRY YOU MUST BORDERLINE ABUSE YOURSELF TO SLEEP 😭

"the creativity they have is insane"... proceeds to write a very detailed long-ass paragraph herself 🤪 i know u couldn't help it though, just giving christopher some extra fuel for tonight 🥵

what i'm gathering from all of this is: (1) maybe he is having to get off at least once if not more???? (2) the more he has to get off, the more he has to fantasize ab different situations??? (3) the more he has to fantasize ab situations, the MORE LIKELY HE IS TO BE READING OUR SMUT FOR IDEAS.

have i taken this out of context? maybe. but is christopher probably excruciatingly horny and getting off to the shit we type? almost exclusively the answer is yes.

TOPHER, if you're out there, i do not give you permission to be on my page so you better lurk quietly in the shadows

watch, he actually has an anon emoji for half the people on this app 😭😂😂😂

[me-saw-hoo-dini]

Kind of a vent post a little bit? I’m talking about the DSMP and a little bad about Nogla and Terroriser

Bro my Twitter is a fucking shit storm rn where every other post is about Dream or Tommyinnit and I do not give a single flying fuck about either or any of them. I did watch the dsmp and I was a huge fan of literally everyone but drama after drama with some shit being true and this that and the fucking other I deleted my original Twitter and unsubscribe from everybody. I don’t want to hear jack shit about ANYONE anymore whether it’s good or bad no matter if they did anything bad or not when I was watching them I do not give a fuck do not show me that shit. Now there are people from the dsmp that I’ll get posts from/about on rare occasions and I feel nothing but sorrow cuz I did love them and they never did nothing wrong no drama or nothing (to my knowledge but like Techno, Puffy, Ponk, etc) and I reminisce about them but other than that I mainly want that shit off my fyp.

The way I do not give a fuck about any of them is that literally any one of them could come out as pedo or abuser or ANYTHING and I would just shrug and go “eh fuck them they can rot in hell” and then simply carry on with the rest of my day. Like okay I probably would be pissed about it like I was with Wilbur but that was more towards the whole “Shelby is lying” and or “Wilbur did nothing wrong” idiots and then Wilbur trying to play it off? Idk maybe I would care I’m not sure how to explain it I just know I don’t wanna hear from/about them anymore at all. Same shit even if it was something happy like “oh they got married” or “oh they had a kid” like… ok cool idc. I keep marking tweets as not interested or even not relevant and I keep getting tweets! Twitter for whatever reason will not let me mute words either so I’m just stuck here having to see these tweets and mark them.

But I know deep god damn well down in my heart that this shit isn’t going to just stay on twitter cuz I know damn well that Terroriser and Nogla are gonna milk this drama on their react channel and I’m going to die inside. Like for the love of god DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THEM MY GOD. Now they might not make a reaction video idk but I just know that somehow they’re gonna bring it up sometime. Fun fact that’s why I don’t follow Nogla, Scotty, or Kelly on Twitter because they talk about the DSMP from time to time and I …

I’ll be real Nogla’s alright or whatever but sometimes he really does frustrate me when he brings up drama out of no where. Like Miniladd for example. Now let me get this shit straight FUCK MINILADD THAT ASSHOLE CAN DIE but Nogla brings up Miniladd any chance he can get and it’s just not funny at all to me it just makes me roll my eyes. “That guy looks like a certain someone we shall not name” “ohh that voice yikes” SHUT UP AND MOVE ON like you’re watching old clips and guess who y’all used to play with I’m gonna pull my hair out. Now Terrorizer isn’t really that bad cuz him and like Wildcat and even Delirious like one time will crack Miniladd jokes sometimes and they’re HILARIOUS you know why? Cuz they don’t take every opportunity they can to bring him up (and they’re really fucking good ones oml)! The only time Terroriser brings up drama that I know about is either back to back to back on the react channel depending on the topic of course or when he’s making the funny one off jokes in random videos (or random one off tweets) while Nogla my god I can tell 94% of the time when he’s about to bring up Mini and just GOOOOOOOD. Idk if maybe Nogla is getting more views/better ratings when he does talk about drama but euugh.

I just don’t wanna hear about any of the DSMP members anymore

Edit: thinking back on it I guess it is a little hypocritical of me/not entirely fair that I’m getting on Nogla and Terroriser for their drama reaction vids cuz like they’ll all make videos specifically about drama like the Johnny Depp v Amber Heard videos but too be fair I also didn’t care about their drama or really care for those videos but I did watch them and there were some funny moments that I laughed at (and I also laughed my ass of at Terroriser/Lanai’s “@AmberHeard there’s always onlyfans” tweet) so idk man I’m just sick of the dsmp and Nogla making Miniladd jokes Ig (ºل͟º)