#idk just something about how they treat all these younger characters always left a bad taste in my mouth | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

linkspooky · 4 years ago

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idk if ur taking asks abt jjk but i was curious on ur thoughts abt gojo i haven’t rlly heard this around but i’ve been thinking abt the fact that gojo desire to basically indoctrinate children to fit his ideal sorcerer society is a bit strange and i saw this on your meta on how the schools only see these kids as tools but doesn’t gojo do the same idk my thoughts are everywhere and i get that gojo was raised in this system so it’s normalised in his eyes but idk gojo’s ideology is lowkey fucked imo and i was curious what u thought

I think Gojo is a product of the same society that raises up kids to be used as tools, and he unintentionally passes that lesson onto his students.Gojo knows that the system is wrong for using kids that way, but he’s such a fundamental part of the system, he doesn’t really know how to overcome it works inside of it instead. I think what he said to Megumi is pretty telling of how he treats these kids in general, he tells him you better get strong or else you’ll get left behind.” He thinks he’s teaching them what’s best, because that’s how Gojo understands the world works, but at the same time he’s telling a five year old kid if he fails to protect his sister it’s all his fault.

Gojo teaches his students to “get stronger, get stronger” as a response for all of their problems. He takes responsibility for their development as sorcerers, but nothing else really, and especially not their well-being as individuals. Gojo basically treats his students like mini-adults, friends he can pal around with, and that makes sense if you think about it, he’s raising them all to be political allies. He’s not really trying to raise a bunch of healthy adults. I think Gojo genuinely does care for these kids and stick out his neck to protect them, and his goal is entirely an altruistic one to prevent the childhoods of other children from getting destroyed like his did. However, Gojo is fatally a selfish person just like Geto is fatally selfless, he doesn’t offer help out of the goodness of his heart, he barters. He always expects something in return from these children.

So, on one level I believe Gojo yes is intentionally using these children. He only extends help when he gets something in return from them, his helps is always conditional on the fact that he’ll gain another ally. However, at the same time I think the problem more lies in the fact that Gojo doesn’t see individual people as individuals, and therefore doesn’t want to pay attention to the indivdual emotions of his students that he ends up using his students this way. He thinks it’s fine. This is how he was used growing up, but this time, Gojo is using them for good ends instead of a bad one.

I think Gojo’s inability to take care of their needs as individuals, especially attending to their emotional needs is why Tokyo Students are so strong indivudally, but weak as a group. Gojo’s only interesting in fostering their strength as sorcerers, not their emotional health, or their interpersonal relationships, because he doesn’t view those things as necessary. I mean he’s only had one best friend his whole life, and look at him, he’s fine.

To give evidence to my argument though, here’s a comparison between the Tokyo Kids and the Kyoto Kids.

1. Tokyo vs Kyoto

Gojo can be a fantastic teacher when he wants to be, but it requires him paying attention to a student’s individual needs, which he almost never does. When he designs a lesson plan raound Yuji, he does two things that make him better than most Jujutsu Sorcerers already. First, most traditional teachers teach that cursed technique is everything, and would have rejected Yuji outright. Whereas Gojo sees Yuji’s strength as a brawler. He’s willing to go outside the box, and buck tradition to focus on a student’s individual strength and emphasize those rather than telling Yuji he’ll never be a strong sorcerer without strong techniques. The second is he comes up with a method extremely suited to Yuji’s learning style.

However, I think it’s important to note that Yuji and Gojo are actually really similiar. He’s a really receptive student who hangs off of Gojo’s every word. For Gojo it’s like him teaching a younger version of himself, someone who believes that strength is everything, and wants to become the strongeste to be a pillar of support to others. You don’t really get good teacher points for spending the most time with someone who’s easy to teach.

And even with Yuji whose really really receptive to Gojo’s highly individual focused learning style, there are several things that Gojo just neglects to teach or even mention. Basic, fundamental things, that every sorcerer should know.

Nanami has to go out of his way to give Yuji the 101, because Gojo neglected to tell him all the basics. Children are smart of course, especially adolescents who are capable of thinking for themselves, but they also generally know what they’ve been taught up to this point. Yuji is a complete newcomer to the sorcerery world, it makes sense he’d basically be a blank slate having to learn all of this from scratch, but Gojo himself either doesn’t know this, or doesn’t bother with it because it’s too troublesome. He thinks of the kids as miniature adults so, it would make sense that he just assumes they know everything he knows already.

That’s the entire point of introducing Nanami into the story. Gojo teaches Yuji to be a better sorcerer, but not to be an adult, and it’s because he doesn’t really see him as a child to begin with. Gojo thinks becoming a strong sorcerer is the way to teach these kids to be good adults, but he neglects the emotional half of having to teach because Gojo doesn’t deal with emotions well. I mean, even in his training of Yuji, he designs a training method where Gojo doesn’t actually have to be there, and present with him most of the time. He can lock him in a room, and go run off to do Gojo things while Yuji teaches himself. As opposed to a mentor like Nanami who constantly watches and monitors his development.

This is where we start to get to the comparison with the Kyoto students. Because even in the creaive way Gojo taught Yuji, there were some things that Yuji just learned wrong, and internalized wrong from Gojo’s lesson.

Gojo explained the theory behind Yuji’s divergent fist, but Yuji learned it wrong, because he didn’t understand the way cursed energy flowed through the body. If Gojo was paying attention, he would have caught it and corrected it, but Gojo’s teaching style is sink or swim, let students learn or fall entirely on their own. Whereas, when Todo actually sees Yuji’s flawed divertgent fist, he’s able to point out the problem.

Todo actually acknowledges that there’s a difference between beginners and elite sorcerers, that their’s a learning curve to these things, and rather than leaving Yuji to learn it on his own he guides him through these things. While at the same time, expecting Yuji to figure out some things naturally. Todo never once goes easy on Yuji, I’d say his standards for people are as harsh as Gojo’s. You either learn it or you don’t. You’re either strong or you’re not. However, there’s a distinct difference between Todo and Gojo’s teaching styles, and it’s that Todo is emotionally intelligent, and Gojo is not.

Todo pays attention to people, he notices when they’re off, when they’re going through something, and rather than just ignore it, he almost immediately addresses it and tries to talk them thorugh it. It’s not perfect of course, but having his emotions paid attention to, helps Yuji develop as a person moreso than a sorcerer.

The Kyoto students have a teacher who pays attention to their individual needs. A teacher who actually teaches. While we may not know much about Utahime as a character yet, you can see the direct impact she has on her students compared to Gojo.

Gojo’s students are individually strong, but weak as a team,. Utahime’s students are much weaker individually, but can come together.

It shows both in the Kyoto Battle Event, but also the Shibuya arc. The Kyoto kids are all unstable it’s true, they’re all prone to lashing out, but because they’ve dealt with such dark emotions rather than repressing them they’re also way more capable of talking about their feelings to others.

Yes, the Kyoto kids don’t deserve to lash out at whoever they want. Yes, lashing out is a bad way to attempt communication. However, it’s also true that the Tokyo kids respond with what basically amounts to self-righteousness. The Kyoto kids are lashing out because they are going through something, because they’re suffering, yet the Tokyo kids don’t really try to understand those feelings.

Kamo was seperated from his mother at a young age. Maki left Mai behind in an abusive household. Nobara has never experienced the same abuse that Mai has so she’s not really in a position to judge which twin she thinks is the good twin, and which is the bad one. Mechamaru is chronically ill and in constant agony, and then instead of getting him medical help he’s just being used as a toy soldier.

So. The problem is. Gojo’s style of teaching. He wants these kids to be political allies. He wants them to try to make a better world than the one he experienced growing up. However, Gojo doesn’t really teach them to think for themselves. He doesn’t teach them to look at the situation, and the way the Jujutsu World is designed to manipulate and use these children.

Individual responsibiltiy is a good lesson to teach. Individual responssibility can help someone get over themselves and their issues and work towards self improvement, but it’s also, not the only solution. It’s also, impossible to overcome these circumstances all on their own.

Mai can’t be strong like Maki. She’s not weak for folding under the pressure of being in an abusive household. You could even argue that Maki isn’t stronger than her abuse, because emotionally she’s weak, she can’t even maintain a relationship with her own sister she has to cut herself off from everyone.

Kamo has to follow the clan’s orders, he’s terrified they’ll hurt his mother and he’ll never see her again. She’s actively being used as a tool to manipulate them.

Mechamaru is already strong as a sorcerer, that’s not going to stop the fact that he’s chronically ill.

Basically, in this regard Gojo’s students repeat what Gojo himself always says. “Have you tried getting stronger?” We can see why this approach doesn’t work with Kokichi, because he did do what Gojo would always reccomend. He didn’t want to burden others with his emotions so he tried to be strong and solve everything on his own, and that resulted in his death.

Think if Mechamaru had been supported. If he thought it was okay to confide his problems with others, if it was okay for him to be weak, and ask for help when he didn’t know what to do on his own.

However, when he tried to do that with panda he just got slapped with a “Your behavior is wrong.” It’s why even when telling people, especially children their behavior is wrong you also need to be sure to take care of their emotional needs as well. Especially teenagers, because teenagers are literally all emotions, they’re not minitature, fully-developed adults. Kokichi was wrong to lash out, but his emotions were right. He has every right to be in pain. When he’s told off, he also takes that as a message that he’s weak for trying to confide anything in others, that him complaining about his victimhood made him weak in the first place, so what does Kokichi do. He retreates into himself, he quiets down about his problems, he tries to solve everything on his own and he fails at doing that because you can’t. You cannot solve all your problems by simply being stronger than them.

Gojo’s students aren’t raised as emotionally healthy individuals, and because of that they also can’t really relate to the emotions of other people, especially the negative one. They are, strong willed individuals yes, strong sorcerers, yes, but they’re not really a team.

I think that’s illustrated in how they all fall apart in Shibuya. All of Gojo’s students basically make the same mistake, they don’t listen to the adults, they charge into battle because “I’m strong enough.”

Nobara, the adults literally all told you not to fight. Nobara: Nah it’s fine I’m strong.

Look at how Nobara loses. The second she starts fighting with Yuji as a team, she makes a sloppy mistake because she 1) underestimated her opponent and 2) was never taught how to fight in a team.

It’s not just Nobara though it’s every single one of them.

Yuji runs off on his own, fights on his own, and loses to Choso. Megumi suicide attacks to take down one (1) opponent whose just a regular curse user when he reaches his limit.

This is what they are all taught. They all have to fight on their own, be strong on their own, and if they’re strong enough they’ll win, if they’re not strong enough oh well. The Tokyo Kids genuinely like each other as a team but they’re always running away from each other. They all overestimate themselves and what they’re capable of handling and get in over their heads.

And it does go back to the Kyoto Battle arc, because the Tokyo kids are just as emotionally disturbed as the Kyoto kids, they just are repressed about it. Take Megumi for example, Megumi has been abandoned and neglected all of his life, and Gojo never really offered him any support or healing for that abandonment.

There’s no canon indication that Gojo ever raised Megumi or did anything with him other than provide for housing, and protect him from the Zenin clan on the condition that Megumi STILL BECOME A SORCERER, JUST ONE POLITICALLY ALLIGNED FOR HIM AND NOT THE ZENIN.

He didn’t offer Megumi a chance at a normal life, or even help him grow up as an individual because Gojo’s not interested in these things. Gojo’s help is conditional on the fact that Megumi work hard to pay him back, and reach his full potential as a sorcerer. As a result, Megumi is walking around with completely unaddressed abandonment issues as a result of never having a stable adult in his life, and this goes, completely unnoticed, which leads to him constantly risking his own life, endangering and harming himself. Megumi’s just as unstable as the Kyoto kids, he’s going to do something dangerous someday soon. It’s just Megumi’s been taught from a young age, he has to be the responsible one in his household, and he has to take responsibility for everything on his own by working to become stronger, and look like where that has led him.

Hmm, I wonder why Megumi always feels like it’s his responsibility to sacrifice, what could have possibly led him ot that conclusion? Why does he feel so responsible for the actions of other people around him? It’s a geuine mystery.

However, the Kyoto kids are capable of doing something the Tokyo kids can’t do. They can cry and be weak in front of other people. They can support each other as a group. Not only did they help Miwa at her lowest point, but Yuji would have given up, had Todo not shown up when he did.

Yuji actually wasn’t capable of handling it all on his own. He couldn’t defeat Mahito just by being stronger than him, or having a strong will.

Individualism like Gojo teaches is important, but it’s also incomplete. It’s only half the solution. The Tokyo kids need the camraderie of the Kyoto kids, the same way the Kyoto kids need to learn to take responsibility for themselves.

That’s why the Shibuya arc ends the way it does. The Tokyo kids failing as individuals, and the Kyoto kids coming together as team. However, since both sides only have half the answer, neither side is able to defeat Kamo Sr. totally.

However, Gojo’s mistakes are shown even more clearly after the arc resolves. Gojo doesn’t actually teach people to think for themselves, because he’s raising them up to follow his politics. Now, look at what his students are doing in his absence. Gojo wants to fix the broken world, but Yuji’s conclusion he comes too after suffering is that he doesn’t want to think about fixing the world. He just wants to become another cog in the machine.

What was the greatest mistake the previous generation made?

Geto. Not only in exposing him to the trauma of Riko dying in front of him. But also, offering him no support a year afterwards. Yaga completely neglecting him and failing to see what was going wrong. Then, when Geto finally did break, sending another student to kill him.

Yaga really can’t understand why this eighteen year old would hestiate to kill this other eighteen year old, that’s been his best and only friend for three years. Why is this child not comfortable with an execution mission? It baffles the mind.

Gojo, by failing to raise his students as emotionally healthy individuals repeats the same mistake.

Yuta and Yuji both don’t really care about the world around them, or politics. They don’t pay attention to those things, they weren’t raised to do that. However, now because of that, because both are willing to become cogs in the machine they’re both letting themselves beused right now.

They refused to think for themselves, so now the elders are manipulating them into a conflict against each other. Yuta because he doesn’t see the situation at large, he only wants to protect his friends. Yuji, because the only way he thinks he has value is by killing curses, he’s just going to keep blindly executing them until Yuta comes to kill him. Gojo’s students are divided specially because of that reason. They’re not together as a group, they’re just a group of particularly strong individuals, and Gojo never even thought that these strong individuals with no particular connection to each other might turn against each other. They might lie to each other. They might keep secrets from each other. They might fail to communicate. Because, Gojo doesn’t really pay attention to complex relaitonships like that. He’s only had his one friend his whole life.

Even though that’s also exactly what happened to his one and only friend, his emotional needs were neglected by the system around him until he completely fell apart. Geto and Gojo’s problem wasn’t that they weren’t “the strongest” when they were together. It’s that they were never “together” again after a certain point.

#Anonymous #gojo satoru #suguru geto #okkotsu yuta #itadori yuji #metasks #jjk meta

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binniesthighs · 4 years ago

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hello stranger | reader x changbin |

a/n: I sincerely apologize for the pain caused with last chapter...so naturally, i had to go and write more pain muahaha. i also apologize for the wait on this one, for some reason i had a weirdly hard time getting this one out of my head, ahhh i think I’m just lil sad about it all ending :( but! we’re almost out of the woods cuties!! thank you so very much reading as always!! <3 this is the second to last chapter and idk how to feel ahhhh

Part 7

Pairing: self insert, female reader x seo changbin, female reader x han jisung

Genre: strangers to lovers, fluff, smut, angst

Tags: (of this part) college au, rapper!changbin, rapper!jisung, establishedfwb!jisung, artist!reader, skz side characters, bestfriend!chan, bestfriend!felix, roommate!minho, explicit language, some kissin’ and that good, good makin�� out, soft n’ intimate body touchinggg, mentions of getting drunk in the past, mentions of a toxic familial relationship, gahhh lots of crying and emotions in this one but it’s bc we’re figuring things out :)

CW: dub-con-ish scene due to conflicting feelings but it gets stopped pretty quick

Word count: 7.6k

Chapters

Jisung shared his apartment with two equally messy boys. You had forgotten their names despite meeting them and seeing them around on more than one occasion. Lucky for you, they each had distinguishing features so you named them as such: tall one and younger one with white hair. Once upon a time the four of you had hung out and they weren’t unbearable, just a bit cookie-cutter as you had called it. Both of them were in the same music school as Jisung and didn’t have many other interests outside going to music shows and playing PC games while loudly shouting.

There was never food in that apartment but somehow there was always dirty dishes in the kitchen. Sure, it smelled a bit like dirty socks, but you never paid too much attention to that when you would clambering in the door with your lips locked with Jisung’s. It was strange walking in not doing so. Tall one and younger one with the white hair sat on the couch eating pizza with feet kicked up on their banged up coffee table. They didn’t say anything as they watched you walk in, but merely rolled their eyes and pretended that you weren’t there anymore.

“We can go to my room.” Jisung raked his hand through his greasy brown strands, then kicked aside approximately ten pairs of sneakers. He held onto your hand tightly--so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

You nearly slipped on that rug that lined the wooden floors of their hallway. It wasn’t the first time.

Just as the rest of the apartment was, Jisung’s room was strewn with all kinds of random articles such as dirty clothes, tangled up cords and old to-go containers. His bed was unmade; it was those navy sheets that likely hadn’t been washed in several weeks. You could never really pinpoint what they smelled like, just that they smelled like him. You had spent nights there too, but they were nothing memorable. No groggy mornings with coffee or sunlight streaked onto his features for you to admire in the golden sheen. It had been running late to class and the dozens of times that you had left jewelry and hair-ties.

“Wanna sit down?” Jisung patted the spot next to him, and you did so.

The two of you sat in silence, the atmosphere became thick with the tangible sense of disaster that hung around the both of you. It was catastrophic.

His trembling hand came reaching for yours, and you let him take it. He sniffled, and it triggered your eyes to fill with the same hot tears.

For the first time, you wondered, what am I doing here?

“You want to lay down?” His puffy eyes asked you.

You nodded, crinkling those bedsheets that were probably full of dust.

In all your months of knowing him, you had never, never cuddled. This was the first time and you really weren’t even tied together anymore.

His nose had turned pink, and he rubbed a bit of snot away with his wrist.

“Thank you for coming here.” Jisung whispered. “But--what are you doing here? I thought that you were with Changbin now?”

I am. You thought briefly. Am I?

“I just...so confused right now. I don’t know...there’s just...I don’t know...”

A tear fell down Jisung’s cheek, and you couldn’t fathom why he would be the one crying when it should’ve been you. You wiped it away. You had never thought of it before, but seeing him cry brought a sting to your chest.

Jisung leaned forward, and the bed creaked lightly, then he kissed you. It wasn’t really a passionate one, but one that he had used to say more than he could himself. His lips tasted salty running over yours, and your brain froze deciding what to do. Jisung never changed: as broken as it felt, he was still starving, needy, and rough. You tried to find meaning in it, or if it made you feel.

It didn’t.

Jisung held your face in his hands, and with a hesitant sigh, he said, “I really, really wanted to do that for so long.”

As desperate he had seemed for you, you couldn’t find the same desire if you had tried. Maybe, you had to find it?

“Kiss me again.” You hushed.

He licked his lips with a gaze softening. “Okay.”

This time he swung his legs around your hips and straddled you with the kind of pressure that you had craved, once upon a time. He bent down to press even more of his heated desire on your skin. He was a good kisser, and you remembered once again how you really had wanted to have him kiss you like this, once upon a time. His tongue slicked against your bottom lip and you gave him the permission, testing it out just to see.

You had thought back then that he was unreal.

Jisung rutted his hips down into your waist, and you had already felt how he had hardened in his sweatpants.

You knew how it would go...or how it used to.

“Baby, I want you so bad. You have no idea. I-I don’t think that I want anyone else besides you--” He broke to meet your eyes. Your world blurred, and sobbed out from under his gaze.

What am I doing here?

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Worry flooded over his face.

“I-I can’t do this, I shouldn’t do this, fuck--what the fuck am I doing?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Please just...get off of me. Please...”

He did so, but still looked just as shocked. “Did I do something wrong?”

He too started to tear up again. At last you could finally name what it was that tugged at his soft brown eyes. Fear.

“Can you please tell me what I did wrong? Y/n, I don’t understand, you’re confusing me so much--”

“--This isn’t right Jisung!” You nearly yelled with broken sobs. “We aren’t right.”

Jisung’s face fell, crestfallen. “N-no--”

“--We destroy each other!! Don’t you see?? Never have we ever been happy together, we’re just...coping! That isn’t love!!”

“Then why the hell am I in love with you??” Jisung spat out the words, and then it was immediately evident that he had regretted saying them.

A deadly silence fell over the room, and all that was left was the both of your weak sniffles.

“What did you just say?”

Jisung grabbed one the pillows then threw it down on the floor with a poof.

“Fuck!!!” He literally shouted. His face had turned red, and snot dripped down to his lip. “I have fucking feelings for you okay?? Is that enough for you?”

“Ji...yo-you can’t--”

“I can’t what?! Is it a fucking crime? Listen, I’m scared out of my fucking mind saying this to you, alright? I don’t know why the hell I am but--”

“--We-we can’t, Jisung..”

“Can’t what?!” He threw his hands up into he air in his exasperation. “Stop fucking confusing me!!”

“We destroy eachother.”

Jisung grabbed another pillow to pummel to the ground, but then stopped himself, digging his fingers into the fabric until his nailbeds turned white.

“We hurt eachother too much. An-and...I don’t think that it’s really our fault either. It’s just...who we are. I can’t give you what you want and you can’t give me what I want.”

Jisung sobbed out horribly, then buried his face in his hands.

“But I fell in love with you...?” His voice was terribly cracked.

You watched as tears dropped into your lap and made little wet dots on your jeans. “I fell in love with Changbin...”

His eyes were puffy and bloodshot, but still glistened, like the way that oil would slick in rainbows with the snow.

“Then what are you doing here?” He asked one more time, but now he had appeared to be utterly broken.

You rose from the bed, looking down at him and drying your face. “I...think I know why.”

“And?”

Outside of Jisung’s window, the view was similar to your own: city lights in an array of colors; each of them like stars on the ocean. On the wall adjacent from his bed, you noticed there was a crack. You had never realized that it was there before.

“I’m admitting something that I should’ve a long time ago.”

╚ ——————————————— ╝

You had likely forgotten to close a window in your apartment somewhere because the winter cold had pervaded the whole space. It took you about ten minutes to realize that it was in your bathroom from when you had taken a shower earlier to air let out the steam.

The second thing that you noticed was the crumpled up blanket resting on the couch from before. For some odd reason, you felt the strong desire to wrap it all around yourself like you could capture some essence of him in it. Sure enough it did smell like that scent of his that you had grown so used to. You let the blanket trail behind you has you made your way to your room to pull on one of his shirts over your head.

“Who told you that you could look so cute in that?” He had said one time.

[23:16] Bin

me: can i call you?

[00:18] Bin

me: if you’re asleep, can I call you in the morning? if that’s okay? i said things that I didn’t mean...i just didn’t know it then.

i’m so sorry

how i treated you...you didn’t deserve that

i understand if you’re mad at me. you have every right.

i’m sorry that i couldn’t see that things that you were trying to show me.

i see them now.

You had thought that now the snow had finally faded into the edge of the winter that near it’s conclusion. Early March, and you wanting nothing more for spring buds to peep from the snow capped floral beds on street corners and for the white hugging the trees to dissapear forever. The winter had felt as if it had lasted for a year--even though this year you had seen less snow than other years.

There had been a time when you firmly believed that once the snow melted, it would get better. Snow was a bitter memory, and it was curse that had to happen each and every year.

The night that you had met Changbin, it had been cold. Cold like the winter that you had tried to hide from. You hadn’t thought of it until now, but he was much like the way that snowflakes melted on your skin. It reminded you of the icy coldness of the world for fleeting moments, then faded just as quickly as it arrived. The little wet mark of him warmed on your skin.

Outside of the miniscule window to your living room, snowflakes got caught up in the edges of the frame, and sprinkled the surface of the glass in their variety of gorgeous fractals and unique shapes. A full moon was painted into the sky with a brightness that could’ve paralleled the sun on this clear night swimming in deep azure.

You hugged the fabric of one of his shirts even closer to your frame, pretending for a moment that it was him that had been hugging you and not the cotton.

“I’m so sorry.” You cried out weakly to the empty room.

Your phone screen flashed with the time: [00:42]. You wondered, maybe he really had given up like he said that he would’ve. Maybe he walked home in the shivering cold, hands shoved into his pockets and decided that he was done waiting; that you weren’t worth his time and the effort. Maybe he walked in his front door, closed it behind himself, and said the words, This is it. No more. Maybe he walked into his room and cried. Maybe he didn’t. You couldn’t decide if you had wanted him to cry for you or not. Both hurt.

[01:13.]

Your eyes dragged with sleep, but your mind moved faster than the pace of your dry eyelids. Dust had settled on the white sheet that you had drawn over the painting in your room. On the underside of the sheet, globs of acrylic had dried and turned into multicolored flecks: a bit like the sheet was a piece of art and and of itself. It was nearly finished, and only had about one more quadrant left that was void of color.

Your wooden pallet had been resting by the window, so it was cold to the touch--as were the little aluminum bottles of paint resting beside it. You used your shirtsleeve to dry away one tear that had battled its way to your lid, then sat back on your desk chair, facing the easel head on.

Black first. Then deep blue, then bright yellow, burnt orange and gold.

Hairs brushed over the canvas, and swept in wide strokes back and forth. With an empty mind, you smeared over the dark colors that faded to the edge of the canvas into the glowing light of the edge of the alleyway painted here. His figure was prominent, even though you couldn’t see his face. He wore black clothes that were simple. Frankly, you didn’t really remember what he had worn that night, but it didn’t matter much. Neon blue and red restaurant signs met on as reflection on his dark black hair.

It was as if your chest and hand had been weighted down even further, but you fought through it to raise them. While you let the tears fall at first, they dried after long and made the skin of your cheeks tout. The room was silent, and so it was outside with the drifting snow. Soon, the painting would be finished, and you could sleep. You couldn’t sleep until then.

if your art didn’t mean anything, what even was it?

The pink lights lining your room provided the only light to the room, however not much else was needed than that.

You bit your lip, now mixing yellow with red.

If you couldn’t tell him. You hoped with every fiber that this would.

[04:51] Bin

me: if you’re up to it, can we talk? or, i can call you?

goodnight

wait its morning

good morning then.

╚ ——————————————— ╝

Chan was good at keeping his promises. There was not one time in your whole time in knowing him that he hadn’t kept a promise, no matter how absurd it might’ve been. He had promised you to buy you ice cream on the first day of snow, and he had promised to share his lyrics with you, no matter how much they would make him cringe. He promised that if you ever needed someone to watch your guilty pleasure reality shows with, he would be over as soon as he could. Next to Felix, you had figured a long time ago that if there were ever people in your life that you were destined to meet, he was one of them. Admittedly, there had been a time when you had harbored a crush on him, but as usual, you had been best at getting in your own way before anything could’ve happened. This, and you loved him as a friend too much.

Too many jell-o shots were both of your enemies. Halfway into the driest seven minutes in heaven of your life, and halfway into your confession to him, he had passed out right in your arms. You were lucky that he had forgotten the event entirely. Or, he was keeping his promise that you had hurriedly made asking him to forget that it ever happened when you and Felix carted him out of there.

While he was good at keeping promises, you more so wished that he had forgotten that one.

Chan had promised that he would personally use his ID card to get into the soundproof booth in the music department to scream.

You hadn’t ever taken him up on the offer until today.

It was nearly midnight and unopened text messages still sat in in empty bubbles on your phone screen.

Even though you had consistently texted “good morning” and “goodnight” for three days straight, the action of sending them didn’t make you feel any better.

Chan didn’t ask any questions, but merely let you through the halls which echoed from your squeaking wet shoes. The green light of emergency signs appeared to be the only guiding lights, but Chan knew the way well.

“Careful. The floor is slippery. They mop after everyone leaves.” He hushed in the silent hallway.

Your fingers and lips cracked from the cold and felt tingly warming up in the dry heat of the building. The two of you turned two more corners, then Chan carefully wrapped his veiny and red hand over the handle to the door marked with “Studio Five.” He tapped his key to the reader, and it beeped with flashing green and orange lights.

“Here. This is the entrance to the booth. I’ll enter from that door to get to the other side of the glass. You don’t...want me to go in with you?”

“Want me to wreck your ears?” You have him a feeble smile.

He mustered his own kind of strength that he had been keeping up just for you. “Hm. You’re right.” Your friend clicked on the light, and it burned your eyes at first compared to the black hall. “Take...all the time that you need, I’ll just be over there. If you wanna...talk about things, I’m here for that too.”

The booth was an ugly shade of lime green, and you wondered how anyone could ever be creative in a place such as this. On the other side of the tinted glass, you watched as Chan flicked on the light, then made his way to push the button to the little intercom system. His voice buzzed with a tinny sound.

“No one can hear you, so....go nuts.”

The walls were too padded with black foam insulation, and for a moment you considered how strange it was, that you, had entered that place to scream--not make music like the room had been used to. Even though the walls were lime green. It still brought a sense of sadness to your chest.

The room spun lightly behind your eyes, and you panted out frantically.

What the hell am I doing in here?

[23:29] bin

me: I hope that you sleep well tonight. i’m thinking of you.

“Is everything okay in here?” Chan’s voice said over the speakers.

“W-what am I doing here?” You repeated the question, feeling panic rise up your throat.

“Getting your anger out?” He tiled his head. “I-I don’t know why else because you didn’t tell me. You angry at someone? Something?”

“N-no? --I mean, yes...I-I don’t know.” You said with uncertainty. Suddenly the foam walls of the room started to close in. “I need to get out of here.”

“Woah! Woah! Y/n! What’s--” Chan chased you out of the room, back into the empty hallway with the squeaky floors and the green light.

“Hey, let’s just...take a breather here for a sec.” Your friend reached out to smooth down your arms. “If you wanna talk about it, I can help maybe?”

You tore from his gasp, then slumped against the wall to slide all the way down and sit on the cold linoleum floors with the heaters pumping steadily above your head.

“He’s not...messaging me back, and I think that I royally fucked up this time. I think that I finally did it, I finally pushed him too far.”

“Who? Changbin?” Chan crouched down to sit next to you. “Is that what this is about?”

Shallow breaths filled up your lungs, “I think...I think I just lost everything that I could’ve had with him, and it’s all my fault...I’m fucking angry at myself, Chan.”

“A-are you sure?”

“I basically told him that I didn’t know if I wanted to be his girlfriend...after everything that’s happened, everything that he’s done and how patient he’s been...but...there was Jisung an-and...I realize that I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean any of it, I want to be with him so fucking badly and I was just too caught up to see it and--”

“--Stop!” Chan barked. “Stop and give yourself a second to breathe! Did you realize that you’re not doing that?

You hadn’t. Nor had your noticed your shaking hands. However, Chan had seen them, and held them with his.

“You said that you do want to be with him but you told him that you didn’t?”

Somewhere in the hallway, one of the emergency floodlights blinked with a harsh white light.

“Yes.”

“And did you tell him that you didn’t mean it?”

“I have but he hasn’t gotten back to me? He would always get back to me, no matter what it was--it makes me worry--”

Chan cupped your hands then brought them to his chest where he held them earnestly. “Some things are out of our control, Y/n. And, I hate to say it but, now, I think you need to come to accept the possibility that maybe...” His gaze softened. “I’m sorry. I wish I could say something more or better but I’m not him and I can’t know...”

You scoffed, “Is that supposed to be comforting?”

Chan tsked, as he often would do with a little sarcastic drag to his voice. “A long time ago I promised you that I would always be honest with you, and you know that I hold to my word.

He rubbed his thumb into your hands.

“Do you want me to say then to go running after him? Throw it all to the wind? Even if it doesn’t end up going your way?”

“...Maybe.” You swiped a tear from the corner of your right eye. “Would it be worth it?”

“Maybe.” He sighed.

A silence filled the hall and the space between you two, and Chan kept holding your hand. It was a simple touch, but you hadn’t realized that you had craved something as such.

“Y/n? Can I say something?”

“Yeah?”

“Even if it isn’t him that it ends up being, I think that you should know that you still deserve happiness in someone. Even after all that you’ve been through, you still do. It sounds like to me...you’re finally realizing it.” He smiled with a bit of a wrinkle to his lips. “I’m proud of you.”

You squeezed his hand. “Thank you. Its...been a long time coming.” Your head hit the wall behind you with a slight thud. “I’ve been painting recently. And...it means something to me. I feel like I found something, like I’m seeing something for the first time in a long time and it makes me really... full. Like he does.”

Your friend let go, then went to play with his shoe-laces.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what was the final straw?”

“He just...loved me different. Better than I ever could myself, and I think that it made me realize that in order for me to love him too, I had to make peace with myself, and just...” You breathed out a laugh, “...Chill the fuck out. But--I know that I can’t let go of it forever. What happened, made me. I can’t give that up, but that doesn’t mean that I should wallow in it forever. I don’t deserve that.”

Chan leaned to give you a light slap to the arm. “Look at you.”

“I...saw Jisung too.”

While anger laced his voice, Chan remained level headed. “...And?”

“Me and him just dug ourselves into a deeper hole. Even he...he could do better. He needs a “Changbin” too. You know? I can’t be that for him. I never was even close. I feel sorry. I should probably see him one last time...”

The image of Jisung’s disparaged face burned in your memory in the midst of it all. Somehow you had forgotten that he had gotten feelings tangled it up in it all, and you had just left. Through all that you had been through with him, you couldn’t let it just go so easily.

“There’s a lot of things that I need to make right.” You sighed out with finality. Next to you, your best friend did the same.

“Whatever happens, Felix and I will be here for you. Like always.”

“Mm. Thank you, Chan. Really. Thank you so much. The two of you are the best friends that I could ask for. I don’t know how you put up with me...”

“Ahhh, don’t mention it.” He shoved his shoulder into yours playfully. “Ya know, if this goes south, we could just date.”

“What?!” Your head whipped over to him so hard it hurt.

“As I recall, about a year ago all it took were some jell-o shots...”

You smacked him upside the head, causing him to burst out laughing in that empty hall.

“I told you to forget about that!!”

“I’m just joking!! Jeez! Can you take a joke!?”

You laughed with him, your goofy and kindhearted best friend. You realized it hadn’t happened in quite some time.

“Yeah Changbin is alright, but me and Felix are forever. Got it?” He teased, and you slumped your head on his shoulder.

“I know.”

In your pants pocket, your phone vibrated and flashed with a white light.

[01:36] L. Minho

minho: i fucking hate that i’m in this position

but

bin’s in a bad way and i’m fairly certain that he hasn’t told you about it all

idiot.

anyway, his parents are being shitty assholes and i think that he really needs you right now, even if he isn’t saying anything about it. actually i know that he does.

i also wanna ask you to kindly resolve whatever shit that you have going on before you walk in our door. out of kindness for both yourself and him.

sorry not sorry. i really do love the both of you and it hurts me to see it be like this.

i suggest that you come over as soon as you can.

Your heart beat its way into your throat with a million emotions, but out of them all, fear for Changbin ached the most.

“Chan, I have to go.”

╚ ——————————————— ╝

It was likely Minho who had buzzed you in.

Luckily, the night had somehow gotten warmer--at least warm enough to where you couldn’t see your breath in front of your face any more. Unfortunately though, you had still worn the shoes that Changbin would scold you for wearing on snow-packed nights. Luckily, the snow had started melted too.

The door clicked when it unlocked, and you slid inside the glass entrance that was smudged with fingerprints and the wet from dog’s noses pressing on the surface.

For a reason unknown to you, you decided to take the stairs--even though he had lived on the seventh floor. Partially you had decided that you had done so because it meant that you had more time with your thoughts; more time to decide if you really had resolved all the shit that you needed to leave on the outside of his doorstop.

You thought back to the painting sitting finished in your room. It waited in all of it’s beauty for the sun to shine on it and the rest of the world to see it. For him to see it. It was for him that you had painted it in the first place. Every ounce of pain and confusion was lathered across the canvas, it was bare for anyone to see after you had kept it concealed for so long.

He would see it.

You took each step slow and carefully, and listened to the way that the sound bounced off of the walls and how the carpet matted on each stoop.

Chan had said, “Even after all that you’ve been through, you still do.”

Minho opened the door after three clicks wearing a bathrobe and slippers. For being so distressed like his message had said, he looked perfectly cozy. You remembered that Minho really was one to keep it all together when shit would get intense. Somehow he had the ability to write whole papers over the course of one day and had passed tests after studying for only four hours. You wished you could manage as well as he could.

“Fuck. It’s late.” He rubbed his eyes. “Come in. Take off your shoes please.”

You did so, and rubbed your toes into their carpet. It was almost as if you were waiting further instructions, but you knew full well what you had to do.

Minho glared at you expectantly. “Well? Shits left outside?”

“Shits left outside.” You repeated with a nod.

“l’ll let him explain. It isn’t really my place. Just--listen to him okay? I think that’s what he needs right now.”

The apartment itself was a bit barren, the only things that were placed in the small space were the things that the inhabitants needed: a dining table, a leather couch, a TV set, a few beanbags and a kitchen kept clean by Minho. It was strange seeing a place so organized and...neat. It was as if this apartment was from an other side of the world compared to what you had grown used to previously. Changbin’s thick and dark black coat hung on one of the dining chairs, the same that he had worn the night that he had last seen you. You wondered if it had been sitting there these past few days.

“Go on.” Minho flapped his hands to usher you down the hallway to Changbin’s room. At the end of the hallway was the bathroom, and seeing it flooded your skin with the feeling of warm water and defrosting skin, lips on lips with heated desire; tracing fingertips that got caught with the translucent stream of water as they brushed down spines and hips. If you could’ve gone back to then and done it all over...you wondered if you would’ve.

“Knock first.” Minho mouthed.

You did, breath hitching when it opened slightly, and you called out his name. “Bin? Its me. Can I...can I come in?”

His hesitant voice called back to you, “Yes.”

He was a crumble on his bed, black socks twisted up with his dark bedsheets and his hoodie riding up his back to expose a sliver of skin where he laid facing away from the door. His beautiful dark hair was knotted.

“B-Bin? A-are you okay?” You advanced forward carefully, reaching out to touch his arm. You had never seen this confident and headstrong man reduced to something so small, it broke your heart into shards to see him as such. You didn’t know what to do with yourself: sit with him? Stand? Crawl in to bed next to him? Unspoken words filled the air, and he sniffed out loudly into it.

“Thank you for messaging me still.” Was what he had said first. “I saw them a little bit ago. I was...too scared to open them at first...your messages. I was...ashamed to...”

“--Bin,” You took two steps closer. “You don’t have to explain yourself.”

He sniffed in with a clogged nose once more. “I’m sorry.”

Two more steps. “No, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry that I didn’t listen to you, and took all of your patience with me for granted. I really don’t deserve it. I tore you up, and that was awful of me. You somehow ended up being collateral damage to me figuring my shit out and I can’t say I’m sorry enough. I understand if you don’t want to keep this going that we--”

“--Can you get into bed with me?” He suddenly interjected. Changbin twisted his hand back as if he knew that yours was there in some superhuman way, and grabbed at it. “It’s...cold.”

Your heart paused, uncertain if you had heard him correctly.

“Please?” Changbin muttered. “Two bodies is warmer than one.”

Silently, you crossed the room and shimmied off your coat so it fell to the floor. It had been partially absentminded, but you had pulled on one of his shirts that day. It was light grey, and had nearly lost all semblance of his scent on it. You pulled the covers over both of you, peering just enough to see his puffed and red eyes and red wet nose. Seeing him like this, you had to fight every instinct to pull him into your arms, but rather keep a respectful distance.

From seeing the way that he dominated the stage to how he looked under the soft glow of your pink lights, to how he had looked as thin and as fragile as glass now, it had all finally made sense to you. As brash and forthcoming as he was, it wasn’t all of who he was in the slightest. If anything, it was who he had pretended to be.

Tears fell over his pink lips. “I didn’t tell you because...I was embarrassed. Fuck,” He laughed a little, “It’s so fucking pathetic. I’m so pathetic for getting so messed up over this all. I-I shouldn’t. That and...it’s not something that you should--”

“--Don’t you dare say that I shouldn’t worry about this Bin. How many times do you need me to say it?” You traced his dark hair over his ear. “What happened to being each other’s problems?”

He smiled with a weak grin, then wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “Minho didn’t tell you?”

You shook your head. “He said that you should be the one to.”

Changbin sighed out, then pulled the comforter up to his nose, adjusting himself to meet your eyes with his that were strained with pink.

“They’re disowning me. For real this time. They asked me to do a legal name change and everything...as if...they’re cutting me out of the family line. Fuck, I mean, they basically are.”

His chest shook with an inhale, and a thick and burning mucus felt as if it had clung to your throat. It was anger and rage, the kind that was so foreign to you, it even started you to feel such a thing.

“Bin, I’m so sorry. They’re...they’re fucking less than human is what they are. Treating you their own son like this...like they think that they can reverse time so that you were never even born of them...” Under the sheets your knuckles clenched so hard it bit the skin of your palms. “I-I’m sorry too...that you were going through this by yourself--”

In one single motion he had spread out his arms to circle them around your upper body and pull it into hm.

There he was again. Rosemary and cedarwood.

You were in shock, but feeling the warmth from his body on yours made you shiver--it was the contact that you had craved so intensely now that you had it, it was so all encompassing that your brain scrambled feeling it.

“Thank you for coming.” He whispered to the top of your head.

Your hands snaked around his body, and you held him back.

In that very moment, you had decided that you would spend the rest of your life holding him back if he would let you. If there was someone out there listening to your thoughts, you prayed that they would let you hold him.

Changbin patted to top of your head with a trembling hand.

“What the fuck do I do?”

Your fingers tugged at the thick cotton of his hoodie.

“They said that either I meet with them to sign away my name, or I pack up, and go back with them as if nothing happened. They said that they were willing to “forgive” everything that I had “done” if I chose to come back home with them, so to school, and forget everything that I’ve ever written, performed...”

“They said that??”

The young man remained silent, but instead nuzzled further into you.

“They said that they could arrange for a meeting with their legal team to finalize it in as little as two days if I decide to do it. Those assholes expedited the whole process and called up their lawyers to make it happen as quick as possible...”

“Bin...” You cooed, and smoothed up and down his back. Being close to him like this you could nearly feel his own heart breaking in his chest against yours.

“Do I forget everything that I was to chase this...dream? Or do I go back, get their support, live a normal life...”

“--Stop.” You gently pushed his hand away to look up at him. “This, all of this is your life Changbin. It’s what you’ve worked hard for relentlessly and it’s what makes you happy, isn’t it? Yeah, it’s harder to do, but you’ve gotten so far, people love you! You’ve made a name for yourself, people want to hear your music--”

“--Yeah, my names gotten itself out there a little too well for my parent’s opinions.”

You wiped a tear cascading from one of his exhausted eyes. “They should be proud of you, not trying to suppress you.”

“They...don’t want me to be Changbin any more. Do you know how that feels? I’ve lived my whole life being me and now they just want to take away the very last thing that I have that they didn’t touch?” He stifled a sob.

“Hey! Just because you change it on paper, doesn’t mean we have to call you that!” You laughed out gently, “If you want to get a driver’s license or something it might be important...but, you’re always going to be Changbin to me, and Minho and everyone else who knows you. A name is just a word. You make up who you really are.”

Changbin laughed out, then returned his hand to pat at your head.

“Who told you to say that?”

You chuckled back at the way that he had turned your words back on you. “No one.”

“I’m just me, but...” Under the covers, your legs intertwined. “I think that if we compare a life of missed oppurtunties to a life where you leave a couple things behind, its worth leaving.”

Body heat swirled between the two of you, and it was as calming as a song. Changbin brought his hand down to caress the side of your cheek with as much gentleness one would with those fragile snowflakes.

Past his shoulder, your eye caught a small piece of paper that had been pasted to the wall above his desk: right in a space where he could see it if he had sat at his desktop. It was crinkled and held several creases and the lead that had been used to draw on it had smudged as if it had rubbed up against itself.

It was a picture of a bench, some Christmas lights, and the city skyline behind it.

Tears flooded your eyes, and then fell freely onto his his fingers where he held your face. They caught in the corners of your mouth, and heated up your eyes.

“Woah, hey, what is it?” Changbin rubbed away the wet and pulled you even closer to him.

“Y-you kept it?” Your voice wavered.

“Kept what?”

You pointed a shaking finger to your drawing posted on the wall, and his eyes widened at first like he was embarrassed, then he slowly faded into something much softer.

He nearly whispered the words, “Of course.”

“W-why?”

“It reminded me of you and that night. I think that I realized something then.”

“What’s that?” He wiped your tears once more, stretching the skin of your face as he did so.

“I realized that, well...I’m in over my head here.” He laughed out lightly. “Do you need me to say it again? I love you a fuck ton, alright? Getting over things, and healing from things...it’s not easy. You...don’t have to apologize for the mess of things and what it did to you. It’s not your fault.”

You threw your head into the crook of his neck to sob openly. But I hurt you. I made you wait...I-I don’t wait you to wait any longer.”

“And I made you wait too. My stupid...my parents fucked me up too, and I couldn’t get over the fact that this fucking mess that they made of me put a wedge between me and you. I didn’t feel like you deserved...I’m a mess too. A fucking nervous, cocky bastard at times and I don’t know how to talk about it. Isn’t that pathetic?”

“What?? No--”

“You wanna call it even then?” He grinned out, and it was his sly little smile that you had found yourself thinking of after you had seen it for the first time those months ago.

“I--”

“Damn. It does feel kinda good to talk about things.” He joked.

You cried out his name even harsher, then melted into his whole body. He was boundless in the way that he had understood you, and how he had looked you without condition or pause.

You don’t have to be scared any more.

With your face muffled in the fabric of his shirt, you let the words fly of your tongue with reckless abandon, and it felt as if you had finally been rid of the crushing shroud fogging your mind, and chaining your heart.

“I-I want you to be...my Changbin. An-and I want to be--”

“--Wait!” Changbin pulled you back by the shoulders with a new and wild smile on his face that only grew wider by the second. A type of excited panic flamed in his chocolate brown eyes. “Willyoubemygirlfriend???” He said at light speed.

You were confused as to why he had said it as such, but you nodded, finally feeling the sense of respite that you had searched so hard for. “Y-yes?”

Changbin startled you with his sudden crack of laughter, then squeezed you so tight that it became hard to breathe. Once he let go looser, he bowed in deep to press dozens of kisses on your mouth and around it. Most of them missed the mark, but that didn’t matter to him. He only stopped for a couple moments to mutter the words, “I wanted to say it first.” You would’ve laughed had he not been attacking you incessantly with more and more pecks that you struggled to keep up with.

“I-I’m sorry again that I made you wait--”

Changbin rolled his weight over to lean carefully over your body tangled up in the sheets, then kissed away at your lips with “don’t say that’s “ quietly. “Thank you for trusting me.” He said quickly, then returned, pouring out oceans of admiration onto your lips until they felt a little raw. You kissed him back too, and you kissed him like you wanted to spend your whole life holding him back. His blissful little “oh’s” tickled at your lips, and you giggled at the way that they vibrated.

Once you had properly kissed nearly all of the air out of each other’s lungs, you laid back, gasping, and each still a bit bewildered.

“Thank you for trusting me too.” You turned your head to look at him where he lay with quickened breaths quaking his chest.

“When I go through with this name thing, can you...be there?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you.” He said, barely loud enough for you to hear. His strong hands fell down his shirt which you wore; down to the small of your back where he snuck up the fabric. His fingers tickled at your tiny hairs there.

“I have one more loose end to tie myself. One more place that I need to make peace.”

Changbin nodded. “Mm. We’ll get through it together.”

To your surprise, Changbin then took to pulling his sweater over his head, revealing his bare chest, then pulled off his pants from his legs a bit awkwardly under the covers.

“W-what are you doing?”

He giggled, then pulled at the hem of your shirt for you to do the same.

“Trust me.” He whispered.

You held his eyes as you did, and your bare skin too met the crinkling edges of the sheets which were a bit colder than you had expected. Changbin watched as you did so with a prideful little grin.

“I-I’m confused.” You hugged your arms over your cold torso.

“You’re so gorgeous.” He merely muttered, uncrossing your arms for him to look at you fully, then pulled you by the under sides of your chin back to his lips. He pulled gently at your bottom lip with his teeth. “Clothes were getting in the way.” He hushed, then set to unhooking your bra behind your back.

“Getting in the way of what?”

“Me being as close to you as I possibly can.”

While he had said the phrase calmly, it still sent heat rising straight to your cheeks.

“I want to hold my love like this for as long as she’ll let me. Can I?”

Your two bodies met in the middle, flush, buzzing with a kind of giddy energy that only heightened the more curious that your hands got eating up each other’s presence.

“As long as you’ll let me do the same.”

You couldn’t quite tell, but it had almost felt as if Changbin had scribbled little invisible messages into the skin of your back.

“Isn’t it obvious?” He answered.

You took his wrist to kiss at the line of a scar that lived there. Naturally, Changbin blushed rosy from the action--then promptly pretended that he just hadn’t.

~🌹~

Bunch of (Ro)ses!

@minaamhh @dazzlehoseok @synnocence @jjewibeans @hyunsluvv @unexceptional-h @bobawithchaitea @lechanters @sailorhyunjinz @silencefavarchive @eunaeiekim @lunarskzzz

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imperiuswrecked · 3 years ago

Note

To me, it doesn’t make sense to make Magneto the main villain because it has been done so much before and it would connect it so much to the Fox Films. Also I think there is a GREAT laziness in writing Magneto especially in films. He generally didn’t want to kill all humans, subjugate them yes because he doesn’t trust them. Which isn’t a ‘good guy’ move in itself and he slips in and out of.

He legit murdered genocide I think when he was going to kill all humans. Like no.

I also think that the average cinema goer likes Magneto too much… or maybe that is me. It would also require them to recast the most famous faces of the franchises?

Like is anyone going to care if they recast Jean, Scott, Iceman, Rogue, Kitty, Beast even Mystique but Magneto? I don’t know. I have long been a fan of an actual Jewish actor playing Magneto but following Ian McKellan would be difficult for the casual fans to accept. I don’t think Fassbender left such an amazing impression.

Even my most average MCU fans friends (and god they love the MCU 😤 but I see past it) still talk about how much they want to see a Magneto solo film.

To me I would put the focus on their reveal and sentinels. Then again I thought they’ll go through Krakoa stuff. Like it turns out the mutants have been living on this Island etc

With the ‘simpler times’ comment I have to for the sake of my sanity have to think that it was because Pietro knew where he was. Things were clear to him, as much as it hurt he had his sister. The following trauma had not occurred. Again I don’t think this is true but I am trying to reason bad writing. He didn’t doubt his morality but was indebted and controlled. Shitty actions were out of his control.

I don’t read Avengers so I didn’t know he was shelved for so long.

I think the Trial of Magneto is trying to ride on the coattails of Wandavision because even though she’s not a mutant a lot of the internet was wanting Magneto to show up. So what is the best way to get those fans who wanted to see that? Set up a family comic book where they establish the family again because I guess the MCU fans heard they’ve changed their background and themselves didn’t like it.

I see the Trial of Magneto as something poorly thought out as they saw what the audience was interested in. The timeline kind of clashes uncomfortably with Inferno. Which makes me think it was wedged in there to ride the Wandavision train and undo the retcon on the side of the main storyline.

Thank you for reading my essay/rant

Ok so I'm going to first say you have a lot of great thoughts and great on picking up the whole forced feeling. You are right, it does feel wedged in there and it does feel forced because that's exactly what Marvel did.

The Trial of Magneto was supposed to be an X-Factor plot, it was Leah Williams next arc, here's an article link talking about her podcast: link (yes I know it's bleeding cool but I don't have time to listen to the podcast)

Leah Williams tells us that X-Factor was canceled because Leah's pitch for the Magneto/Wanda story for X-Factor, now called Trial Of Magneto, became such a popular pitch at Marvel but they thought the reader numbers for X-Factor wasn't big enough for this story, so they wanted it as a separate comic. And canceled X-Factor #10 rather than seeing it run as originally planned, with the Trial beginning in X-Factor #15. Williams says she only learned about the cancellation of X-Factor when she was writing #9, so as she had to finish the series quickly, squeezing six issues worth of story into those last two issues, calling it "cramped and rushed".

So I'm not a fan of Leah but the way Marvel treats it's writers has always been terrible so this cancellation doesn't surprise me. Could this be about W*ndaVision? It's likely, but it's more likely this has to do with Hickman bowing out. It's no secret literally everyone hated the retcon and I always knew it would be undone but I didn't think it would take 6 years but here we are.

Hickman leaving is a bigger thing, he stated in an interview ( link ) that he had planned Krakoa and X-Men to be a 3 arc story, and he wasn't allowed to move onto the 2nd arc because the clowns at Marvel liked the idea of Krakoa too much and I'm so mad because that's exactly the kinda behavior that annoys me with the fans, them thinking Krakoa is just a fun playground for the mutants to mess around with.

"Oh, plans have changed entirely," Hickman says. "When I pitched the X-Men story I wanted to do, I pitched a very big, very broad, three-act, three-event narrative, the first of which was House of X. And while this loosely worked as a three-year plan, I told Marvel upfront that I honestly had no idea how long the first part would last because there were a lot of interesting ideas that I had seeded that other creators would want to play with, and so, we left this rather open-ended. I was also pretty clear with all the writers that came into the office what the initial, three-act plan was so no one would be surprised when it was time for the line to pivot." Hickman continues, "However, I also knew that I was cooking with dynamite, and it was very possible that what I had written in House of X, and the ideas contained within, was not actually the first act of a three-act story, but something that resonated more deeply and worked more like Giant-Size X-Men, where it would represent a paradigm shift in the entire X-Men line for a prolonged period of time. So, during the pandemic, when the time came for me to start pointing things toward writing the second-act event, I asked everyone if they were ready for me to do that, and to a man, everyone wanted to stay in the first act. It was really interesting, because I appreciated that House of X resonated with them to the extent that they didn't want it to end, but the reality was that I knew I would be leaving the line early."

I'm so MAD because the thing I was predicting, that Hickman would have it come crashing down and everything would be revealed to be terrible and Mutant Death Sex Cult Island wasn't a paradise is never going to happen because the fucking CLOWNS at Marvel don't want him to move past it. I may have my personal gripes about some of Hickman's writing but we can't deny the man wrote one of the best if only the best Marvel Event with Fantastic Four/Avengers/Secret War.

As for the simpler times comment, like I have my theories that I wrote out here, and that's what I think is most likely but I do think Pietro's life has never been easy or simple once his adoptive parents died. Pietro could be drinking to a time before the Brotherhood.

I would love for a Jewish actor to play Magneto and any other characters who are Jewish. I would love for a Jewish writer to be able to write them too. However Ian's performance literally set him in the minds of the people as Magneto, not even Fassbender's bleh one note Magneto could compare. Imo the only reason people liked the younger Magneto was because he was young, handsome (? ig idk i dont simp for him) and they could ship him with young professor X (cowards. where is the old man ship???) But I feel like a new actor could definitely fill the role if they are Jewish and the writing was good.

Magneto's writing in comics... well I just wish we could have a Jewish writer for him. There's some great stuff for him but I feel like characters like him and Doom could be written better by non white/american writers.

Although by today's standards the og X-Men trilogy doesn't hold up I will defend the first two movies with my life simply because after Blade these movies opened up the idea that a good serious, non campy version where characters called Magneto and Cyclops were taken seriously. X2 in my mind was the definitive X-Men movie. Was it totally comic accurate? No, but it doesn't do what the MCU does, it doesn't treat the watcher like they need to have their hand held through all the military propaganda and "hints to the comics". Also side note; the reason no one cared about any of the other X-Men being recast is because all through most of the X-Men movies the focal story point has been Professor X vs Magneto. If they really want people to care about those characters/actors then we would need stories that focused on them. Not like how Storm barely had any character growth or plot in the og X-Men and even young Ororo got mishandled by the script. This is why I feel we should have "origin movies" for the X-Men that don't do what Wolverine Origins did and try to make a whole new cast but instead should use the stories as they are. If it was Kurt's story then we would see him join the X-Men, and have the other actors revolve around that. Same with each of the others, the X-Men work best when they are working off each other and each given enough screen/page time to shine. Unfortunately we all have our favorites, even movies and writers, so those are who are going to be pushed for fans to love.

Thank you for your long rant and sorry for my own long rant/reply.

#xmen #x men #comic talk #xmcu #magneto #erik lensherr #imp answers

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feckin-zicons · 3 years ago

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that's why i hate larries, i hate them with all my heart. besides being boring they are hypocrites 🙄

Hey nonnie, sorry its taken me so long to reply but if you’re following me you know I’ve been travelling lately and have been more scatterbrained than usual. Not that I’m ever not scatterbrained, but its been just a little crazier than usual!

Now I wouldn’t go as far to say I hate Larries. After all their delusions can be pretty funny sometimes!

Joking aside, I don’t hate Larries, I love Larries, I’m a Larry, so I really hesitate to tarry the whole group with the same brush. However I do strongly agree with you that there are those who are complete hypocrites. Nothing annoys more more than when Larries ™ treat the other boys, other celebrities, their friends and even family as one more side character to the Larry Show.

In particular when Larries ™ flood comment sections asking or in some cases, ordering people to confirm rumors/the couple being together. The absolute fucking disrespect. Not just because they’re flooding comment sections in videos streams, tweets, what have you, that sometimes have nothing to do with the couple in question, but because its presumptuous and rude as fuck to think they’re owed a coming out- just because they’re fans of the boys.

Stop it. Thats fucking ugly as hell.

While I have no doubt all the boys will one day be out (as referenced by their continued efforts in fighting the closet. I don’t get the sense the boys will just stop at being freed from their contractual obligations). It should and will be on their own terms. Provided they’re not forcibly outed some other way.

Coming out is a deeply personal experience and no one, no one ever, has the right to out someone else. I’ll never not be absolutely furious at the Larries ™ who posted about having ‘receipts’ that would out the boys. Which… tbh weren’t receipts at all but thats a whole other story. I’m also still angry at the reactions after Liams Attitude spread that wouldn’t have been as bad if not for the entitled fandom that peddled ridiculous claims beforehand about Liam confirming Larry to be real.

I mean… What the actual fuck. Setting aside the fandom experience of the time, and boy was it an experience. What right would Liam have confirming Louis and Harry’s relationship? I mean, get some perspective? It doesn’t help that a lot of fandom adults were the ones coming up with, and reblogging those theories and the younger fans ate it up. It would have made more sense for Louis and Harry to do it but idk maybe I’m still out of touch for thinking so. I mean, it felt like every other week someone was talking about Larry coming out. It was such a shit storm oh my god.

Biggest issue I still have with them is that the entitled behaviour hasn’t stopped. For some it seems like, Larry coming out is it for them. Like pack it up, goodbye, shows over, Louis and Harry are gay and in a relationship and everything is rainbows, we get to see cute pictures of them and everyone lives happily ever after.

Yeah, no. Coming out, for anyone, is just the beginning, can’t even begin to imagine what its like for them. They’re still going to need everyones support, and it irritates me that for some fans it seems so fucking conditional.

Time and time again, I’ve seen tweets, and posts, and videos, whatever, going on about Larry coming out and it reads like a fucking wattpad story. Not just that but its always on the assumption by the poster, on the off chance they consider the other 3/5ths of the band and Ziam being a possibility, that Larry will come out first?

What?

I’m sorry but, what?

Everything I’ve seen from the boys tells me they’re all in this together, they support each other and are working through the bullshit as a team. We have all seen the No Judgement music video yes? The merch, posts, double speak etc referencing each other, yes?

I mean, I suppose if you only look at Louis and Harry, like so many do, sure. Only Larry matters, everyone else is a side character in their life.

(Lemme just, scream for a second).

However, that kind of thinking leads them to the wrong conclusions. Like… assuming the SBB/RBB countdown was attributed to nothing, when it counted down to Liam finally being free of Sophia. In the years since, I’ve seen Larries ™ backtrack on claiming the bears had anything to do with the boys, that they weren’t behind it at all, or that they were just trolling the fandom.

You know, despite all the proof otherwise, and some really, really good posts breaking down clues about what the boys were trying to tell us. The moment something might not actually be about Louis and Harry its like all their thinking shuts off. Its frustrating. Really fucking frustrating.

Seriously, fans of the other boys as individulas, not just Ziams, have been talking about the stunts too and how they fit together. Its why we tend to be right, because we’re considering the entire group. They’re still a group. They’re not free until all of them are free.

Just for that Nialls coming out first. Lmao. I’ll call it now. Lets go Niall, whens the baby coming. We all wanna know. Its been years.

Imagine, imagine! Acting like coming out is some race to be won. The fucking audacity.

Go outside and touch fucking grass you absoulte ninny.

I get it, you want to be vindicated, you want to be rewarded for putting your faith in two celebrities being together.

Newsflash you dandelionfluff, its not a race, Louis and Harry coming out isn’t a fucking prize. Thats not what supporting a relationship looks like.

Its worse when someone admits they don’t know much about Ziam or the possibility of Niall being LGBT+, and claim they’re open to it, but then immediately tweet or reblog or sub tweet or tag comment a post or answer an ask from another Larry ™ talking about how Larries ™ are the most marginalized and persecuted group.

???

In what fucking world?

IN WHAT FUCKING WORLD?

If we wanna play that game, boohoo, the media claims Louis and Harry aren’t friends anymore because of crazy shippers. Meanwhile Zayn publicly isn’t friend with anyone and “left” the band… despite the Ziam fandom calling the stunt about either Louis or Zayn “leaving” and getting it down to the exact week (the second article coming out a week before about the Ziam kiss pretty much cemented it for Zayn leaving. Which did a lot to fan the flames of the already rabid fanbase when Ziam got two articles confirming a Ziam kiss over the years and Larry got nada. Like that actually means anything).

Not to mention Larries ™ using the hetties and management tactics against the other parts of the fandom to silence them.

Who cares what the media says anyway! TPTB, 1DHQ, The Sun, The Mirror, Simon and his minions and their unpaid interns have used the media to split the fandom apart and it worked.

Who the fuck cares if the media calls the 1D stans delusional, you know the truth! The truth it out there and you’ve seen it! The truth is coming! Who gives a damn about what some two bit “journo” who failed out of their creative writing course writes? They get worse by the year. If it wasn’t so pathetic and hilarious I might actually feel embarrassed for them. They can’t even come up with new stories and have just taken to copying old articles, but you’re upset with them??? Give it a rest. Honestly.

The sense of disconnect, entitlement and victimhood of some Larries ™ is absolutely ridiculous.

Oh my god they’re Karens. I’m not trying to be insulting, but thats exactly who they remind me of.

I’m not going to say its a surprise to me that so many in the Ziam fandom are POC, LGBT+, and Neurodivergent and any combination of those, but I am going to say I’ve read a lot of Larry fics that just have Het sex made gay. Those in the Ziam fandom just tend to look at facts in a different way than Larries do due to their life experiences. A interfaith, interracial, relationship where one or both partners fall under the Bi umbrella (not saying Louis or Harry can’t be or aren’t Bi+ but rumors, and the way the fandom markets them, puts them firmly in the gay category) looks very, very different than gay or straight relationship. Both looking from outside and being in one. There’s just different dynamics at play that aren’t often realized or understood by the gays and hets.

Its not a bad thing. All relationships are different. The issue is that theres a lot of biphobia/racism/religious prejudice etc that arises from people being unwilling to understand the inherent differences.

Taking myself for example, I’m bi, like, bi as hell, and I don’t understand how gays and hets only like one gender. I just don’t. Can’t wrap my head around it. If someone asks me to choose one gender over the others to prefer I can’t. Its so stressful. My brain goes into panic mode and it feels like I’m being torn apart. My sense of identity is shaken- its a shit feeling. I just can’t lie to myself like that. If other people feel the same well, its no wonder bi+ have such high rates of depression and suicide. Its not about choosing who to like, there is no choice, I just feel attraction to everyone. Aces, I get. Its similar to being the opposite of what I feel, or not feeling an attraction to someone I’m not interested in. Easy. Gays and hets? I’m completely lost on.

Completely, and I know I’m not the only one who feels that way. But that doesn’t mean I’m not willing to try and understand where they’re coming from. Its alien to me, personally, but I’m not going to shut down the fact, that theres a fuck ton of people who only like one gender or try and make up reasons as to why they’re actually bi+

I digress, none of the boys fall neatly into the gay stereotypes, its just that parts of the Larry fandom have boxed Louis and Harry into certain roles to fit preconceived notions (likely do to them initially fitting in better with the white, sassy, somewhat effeminate twink thats been plastered all over Hollywood as their “LGBT+ representation” for years. Gag), they can understand better, and only look for proof to back up their theories but don’t look at things objectively.

They really need to get out more and make some LGBT+ friends that aren’t on the internet and talk to some gay elders. They need educating that’s not the often sanitized and insulting Hollywood version, that’s all I’m saying.

They made Louis and Harry more palatable for themselves and its… really gross.

I don’t know, I don’t get it.

Some Larries ™ turned the boys into their fandom and fanfiction stereotypes when they’re so much more than that. The Sony leaks should have been enough to dissuade the fandom, and prove that the brand sold to the broader audience is just that- a brand, and yet… Niall only talks about food and golf and Ireland and is only allowed to be straight or ace. If he exists at all its just to be Capt Niall. Liams slow and dumb and depending on the day he’s either Capt Liam or a horrific abusive homophobe. Zayns just The Worst, a unstable drug addict, and the boys hate each other, and they should have kicked him out of the band sooner because he never wanted to be part of them anyway, etc.

It drives me absolutely around the bend some days. They’re real people who don’t owe anyone anything, especially not coming out.

Yes, I think they will. But they’re not obligated to. They can change their minds, I’ll support them regardless of an “official” coming out or not.

Look, a part of me gets it. They wanna be right, they wanna prove the haters wrong, they want to be able to say I called it all along! The vindication will be sweet.

But like, it takes a quick look at someone other than Louis and Harry to realize theres something hinky going on with Liam, Zayn and Niall. Please listen to their fans who have spent just as much time as you have looking into Louis and Harry compiling together evidence.

It might take a weekend to watch the ILYSM and pterodactyl bros videos and a few more hours looking into some Niall blogs, which isn’t much compared to the hours I know they’ve spent looking into Larry. At least then they’ll have enough information to form an opinion on things.

I wonder, for some, what would happen if Larry didn’t come out, or didn’t come out first, or one of the other boys was outed against their will. Because… I don’t know. It seems like some would rather just be proven right at this point.

I get it. We’re tired. Its been eleven long years. But this isn’t a television show were everything can come to a head with a s3 or s4 cliff hanger and fixed in the series finale. Its real life, and they started off as boys trusting industry veterans who never had their best interests at heart.

Iduno. I just want some Larries ™ to take a step out of the echo chamber, realize life isn’t The Larry Show & co. And especially. ESPECIALLY, that every instance were someone, friends, family, co-works, industry peeps etc support the boys they are SUPPORTING THE BOYS, NOT THE FANDOM. They are not “confirming Larry for the fans” they’re doing it to support the couple, not to cater to the fandom. Please stop confusing the two. There’s a huge fucking difference. Learn it.

#Honestly it should be the Liam Payne the three guys who’ve had a crush on him and the one who married him.#aka the hill I'll die on #lmao #sorry not sorry #IM SORRY IT LOOKS LIKE I HAD A LOT MORE TO SAY ABOUT THIS THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD #ASDFGHJKL;#also please don't think I'm calling anyone out specifically #these are a lot of generalizations and trends I've noticed after being in fandom for nearly 11 years they pop up all the damn time #circles we're just going in circles #I've been following Ziam in particular since the Nov 2011 interview #but suspected Liam had a crush sometime before when I saw a gifset of him talking about Zayns birthday presentsbc he as acting the exact sa #e way I was when I was crushing on a girl I knew #I saw myself in him and ignored it for another day #lmaooo #ziam #larry tunnel vision #larry vs ziam #Larry vs Niall #fandom bs #ask

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rip-a-dip-dip-you-potato-chip · 4 years ago

Text

what have I created?

idk if yall like this, but they just exist not i guess :/

ok the the first one is Royalty AU

first things first, when I say Royalty AU, I don't mean the classic shit we've all become accustomed to. Im talking about the good old Chinese royalty! And I want to emphasize that these guys will/should be dressed in century appropriate attire. As someone thats read a handful of 'marinette, princess of china' fics from the ML Fandom, I've noticed a common trend. Marinette wouldn't be in the culturally appropriate clothes, always ballgowns. Not that there's something wrong with it, its just most of if not all these fic are set in China, so I'd expect Chinese royalty to dress as THERE dress code calls for. And since this AU takes place far in the past like, it won't make sense for any of the characters to be in royal clothing that wasn't from there region. I'm not trying to white knight/gatekeeping. Im Guyanese not Chinese. But since JTTW and Monkie Kid take place in China, it's only right. In my opinion that it. You don't have to outright agree with me.

With out of the way, it's time for that good old AU crack

- Wukong is the king of the Flower Fruit kingdom(or a different one if you'd like, again I'm only familiar with what western culture has taught me, but I'll try my hardest)

- he’s single but rumor has it he used to/still is dating the Vigilante/thief The Six Eared Macaque

- *chants ShadowPeach violently*

- no one know whether it true or not

- On of his wanders around the kingdom he finds an abandoned baby in a basket.

- and no shit sherlock it's fucking baby Xiaotian

- I think we all know where this is going because i'm a simp for Monkey Dad & Monkie Son shenanigans

- Xiaotian becomes prince

Shit, ill be referring to Xiaotian as Mk from now on, I mentioned this before in a fic I wrote for lmk that Mk's a nickname for Xiaotian for some reason- wait i don't have to explain my self to you people!

- Sun loves his son

- MK is treated differently by staff and others because he's not blood related to the king

- no one mistreats MK per say, because there King loved his adopted son, but words are said behind his back

- Sometimes MK hears what’s said, and he feels as if he won't live up to his dad’s legacy.

- He meets Mei during a festival

- Mei is from a noble family, that wouldn't mind if they got a connection into the royal family.

- but it becomes hella clear to Mei’s family very fast that the two are just friends, and will always will be. but hey there daughter is bffs with the prince so that's a plus.

- the Demon Bull Family is rules a kingdom as well, I dont/am not creative enough to think of a name I leave that to you.

- It's a common misconception that DBK is a tyrant, when he’s not.

- most of the time...

- they have been at war with the Monkey King for some time now and settled for a peace agreement.

- that agreement being there sons to marry

- oooo original i know

- MK and Red Son are roughly the same age, Mk being 20 and RS 22

- RS is revolted/disgusted at the idea of being wed to the Monkey Kings child, even more so when he realizes MK is adopted,

- but, that all changes the second he meets MK while he meets him by accident when he gets kinda lost in the palace when he and his parents go to discuss the arrangements.

- the second he looks at MK, he's instantly in love. MK less so, he's nervous and honestly kinda bummed he's not marrying someone he loves but it's for the good of his ppl, and he'll do anything for them.

- RS isn't even aware that MK is Suns adopted son until MK walks him back to the meeting room.

"Oh There you are MK! I was about to have a servant go fetch you!" Sun Wukong says, gesturing for his boy to come sit with him.

"S-sorry for keeping you waiting I got caught up in my lessons with Mr. Tang" MK responds, sitting next to his father. Red Son looked gobsmacked. The beautiful young man he had bumped into, was the prince of this land? Damn, life truly blessed him. Or cursed him depending on how you looked at it.

- the two are left alone in a separate room for a while.

- And MK straight up tells RS why he's agreeing to this union.

"Look Red Son. I've dreamed about meeting my one true love for a while. And I would give almost anything for that dram to be real. But I wouldn't ever dare give up my people, for as there price they mean more to me. I'm doing this for them, no other reason" MK says, his back straight and hands folded neatly in his lap. The look in his eyes was a mix of sadness, but that was drowned out by loyalty and determination. It just made Red Son fall for him even harder. Clearing his throat Red spoke.

"I understand, for im doing this for the betterment of my people to. But I propose a wager"

"A wager?"

"Yes, if i can make you fall in love with me by years end, before our marriage, we can live together like in the fairy tales from far away. But if I fail, in a years time afterwards you will be permitted to find your own path in life" Red Son stated. MK took a moment to process what was happening.

"So, if you succeed in making me fall in love with you, before our marriage we can live happily ever after?" Red Son nodded in response, letting the younger continue.

"And if I shouldn't fall for you, in a years time after our union, im free to leave?" Red Son nodded once more.

"So, what do you say?"

...

"Deal"

In the end, your free to choose their fate, should Red Son win the hart of Mk? Will he fail? Or will he let him go, and let him travel the country, after all Mk's a free spirit and keeping him trapped in a big house is like keeping a cannery trapped in a cage only for its song, only for it to dul. Or will the unthinkable happen and will both boys find their freedom? together or appart? I don't know, because that's all up to you 😉

personally, I’m partial to where MK and Red Son both find freedom together. Like they straight up run away together to somewhere far away and just live out there lives together.

this could also be genderbent thing as well. MK or Red as their respective counterparts. Again it doesn't have to be, but it’s whatever bro. im just spitting out the idea.

Also, there is a main side plot that they fight the WBS throughout the year as well, along with other shenanigans you wanna throw in.

____

The second is a My Hero Academia/BNH/MHA AU

truth be told i'm not a big fan of MHA i think it to over hyped(this is also coming from the same person that’s a Fairy Tail fan lol), and the fandom i don't even know how to describe that mess, but I will admit not the whole of its toxic since every fandom has some toxic members, some even more so.

I just sometimes find myself enjoying MHA AUs like the Fullmetal Alchemist, Danny Phantom, Evil!Deuk AU and several others.

to make it clear I don't see this AU taking place the same time as the main plot of the actual Anime/Manga. This could be either like 6-10 years before or after the plot idk bro. But i’ll do this after the main story plot of MHA, so keep that in mind ya? another thing, the gang is still in China, the top hero school in the world just so happens to be in Japan, and it’s only ever mentioned by Sun wukong and other pro heros. So MK never attended AU. in short it’s only ever mention/ reference.

- Mk was considered Quirkless as a kid.

- he was just a late blumer, i swear

- Mai’s Quirk is called Dragon.

- it pretty much works the same way as it does in the show(duh)

- Tang’s got a knowledge Quirk,

- my man can retain information and he’s basically an archive of information drawback being his personality lol

- Piggsy is a Animal that gained a Quirk

- in cannon to my current knowledge, there are two other characters that can confirm animals can become sentient. the characters being Fumikage Tokoyami, & Nezu the principal at the school UA.

- Sandy is just Conner Kent, aka he like superman but can't fly, or shoot lasers from his eyes. And blue.

I have two scenarios for Macaque and Wukong

*- The first one is that, Sun Wukong & Macaque are brothers. twins to be exact.

- they where legit people, but have mutation quirks that made them too like monkeys.

- the added powers were just a boues.

- Sun and Mac are close growing up, like there brothers but also best friends.

- the draw back to there quirks could honestly be whatever you want bro idk, same with the others tbh. Personally I like to think Sun just has lack of motivation, and Macaque needs to draw on other people's energy.

- Sun is a hero, Monkey KIng and Mac is a villain Six Eared.

- Sun was always treated has the golden child in the family, Mac always resented that, but there shitty up bring didn’t stop the two from being good brothers to one another.

- soon tho the resentment became hatred when Sun was able to attend UA in Japan, while Mac didn't.

- Mac be angy

- so he became a villain, and joined the Chinese branch of the LOV(league of villains)

- Sun doesn't know this till he finds out during the all out war during the main story. and by that time he’s a full on hero with is own agency(The Flower Fruit agency)

- when the hero's ultimately win and Mac is arrested

- This ultimately hurts Sun a lot, his brother was in jail now, arrested for his involvement and wrong doings, he knew nothing about this! this brother, his blood. A bad guy? why? he hadn't seen his brother since he left for UA, he hadn’t seen him when he came home, and started his agency.

- this just puts Sun into a funk so he’s not as active as he used to be, and he starts thinking he might need a successor

*- The second one is that they were two separate people that had similar quirks and both attended UA but Sun ended up in the hero corse. so 1A.

- Both Macaque and Sun have similar quirks, Sun’s is obviously more light based while Macaque’s is more shadow based(this applies to the first one as well)

- Macaque was placed in class 1B, U.A.’s High's Heroics Department, I believe, you can correct me.

- In cannon Class 1A and 1B both went to the training camp. I can see the teachers pinning Sun and Macaque against each other to hone their skills.

- And because of that they become great friends

- In fact when they graduate they both co-found there hero agency together in China and are a duo.

- But due to Monkey King’s popularity and Six Eared's association with shadows(people sometimes saying he has more of a villains quirk than a heros) the public see’s Macaque as Sun’s sidekick when thats far from the truth.

- now it’s up to you whether you think that Wukong and Macaque would be in a relationship together, but knowing how cooked we all are, ShadowPeach is a thing here more than likely.

- If you do or don’t support/ like the ShadowPeach aspect, the two would be living together regardless since its more cost efficient.

- They my be heroes but living costs are expensive!

- I would imagine there would have been a huge fight/argument between the two in privet of course, at there home.(or in there shared office if you want the extra angst of the other people they work with hearing them fight)

- If the two are dating, then this would either lead to an out right breakup, or Macaque just up and leaving with Wukong thinking he’ll come back once he’s cooled off. But after a week, with no sign of his partner, or him answering texts or calls, not even coming into work. Wukong gets worried that something might have happened to him. so there wouldn't be a confirmation if they were still a thing or not.

- But Wukong remains hopeful, despite the nagging at the back of his head, and gut telling him to go find Macaque, or atleast make a public statement, or even just tell another pro hero about it.

- on the not so shippy side, Macaque and Wukong still have there argument, and much like the ShadowPeach esc side, Macaque up and leaves, and isn't seen for weeks. the only difference here is that when Wukong comes home one night to there flat, most if not all of Macaques stuff is gone.

- where as if this was the ShadowPeach side, Macaque leaves all of his possession in the flat he and wukong share. for the simple reason being, he still loves him and wants to go back, but Macaque being Macaque can’t bring himself to do it, especially after seeing just how hurt Wukong looked when he yelled at him just before he left.

- in other words, ANGST DIALED UP TO A 10 BABY

- in either case, its a news report that confirms Wukong's suspicions that he desperately didn’t want to believe, and that is Macaque turning into a villain.

- much like if the two were brothers, Wukong just can’t take it and is no longer as active as he once was, and is thinking about, either A) Retirement B) Saying, “Fuck Society, Be Gay Do Crime” and join Macaque as a villain himself, or C) find a successor, and a way to bring Macaque back to there side, but most importantly, back to him.

- also extra points if you're after people's hearts and want to make them suffer; - If there dating, Wukong curle’s up in the bed he and Macaque shared, holding/wearing something of great value to Macaque and just crying himself to sleep, where as Macaque is getting wasted on alcohol, as he stumbles out of the bar he’s in, he either see’s something that reminds him of Wukong or while he’s trying to put his wallet back into his pocket, a photo of them on their first date fall’s out. and Macaque just cries in a nearby alley way. And it’s there where he gets indoctrinated into the League.

- If there just friends, macaque heads to the nearest forest and just levels it, where as Wukong just gets engrossed into his work, trying not to think about it. you could add you own spin on this, again i'm just spitballing.

- NOW BACK TO MK! :D

- Obviously MK is a huge Monkey King fan

- at Twenty MK has come to terms he's quirkless (HE’S NOT)

-for ANGST reasons MKs fokes kicked him out at this realization at 13.

- he works at Piggsy's Noodle shop, and has been since he was 14.

- don't need a quirk to drive or cook!

- the boy lives a content life with his new family, till DBK happens :D

- DBK runs a Mafia(in conjunction with TLOV) and has been in jail for like 5 years thanks to Monkey King, PIF and RS brake him out one night when MK's out making a late night delivery since Piggsy had the bright idea to go 24/7 service!

- one thing leads to another and Mk somehow manifest what looks like the Monkey King's staff, but its not, it’s MKs powers, it just so happens to be the same power the Monkey King has. And it practically goes down the same way in the pilot.

- but unlike the pilot Mk and Mei go straight to the FF Agency, after making a panicked call to Pigsy and Tang.

- one way or another Mk are lead into Wukongs office. Mei being forced to stay in the lobby.

- they have there convo, butterfly monkey squishing included.

- "And so, I want you do be my success-" BOOM 💥

- from there they rush downstairs and see that the lobby has been infiltrated by the DB fam, and you know fight.

- once the DB family seems like there down, PIF wisks them away. Much to Monkey King’s displeasure.

From there stuff kind plays out like cannon, the calabash ep is just a conjoint quirk the Demon bros have. As for EP9, ill have to script that one out myself lol. I'll get onto it as soon as my will to commit stabs me in the face. Till then have a dancing Kermit the frog.

Now if you'll excuse me, am about to Kermit a felony :D

(For legal reasons thats a joke)

Psst @writingamongther0ses its done

#lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lego monkie kid au #rip a dip dip wrights

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smediumsmeatbae · 4 years ago

Text

And They’re Always Glad You Came

TITLE: And They're Always Glad You Came PAIRING: Bartender!Chris Evans X Reader SUMMARY: After being stood up on a blind date, a certain blue eyed bartender wants to cheer you up WORDS: 2.5K WARNINGS: Smut, swearing, fluff, brief mentions of cheating, reader feeling sorry for herself, bad smut writing (probably, idk) A/N: I think this was supposed to be a drabble but ended up being a one shot as I got carried away with this fic. This fic was made for the prompt: "Bartender!character and you having sex on the bar after it closes" by @the-ce-horniest-book-club. Hope you guys enjoy! I had a lot of fun writing this. Likes/comments/reblogs are always appreciated! As always, don't be a dick and post my stuff elsewhere without my permission.

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You were still on your first drink that you had been nursing pretty heavily for the past hour. You had been stood up, and by a blind date, no less. You were pretty sure the night couldn't get any more humiliating. Who gets stood up by a blind date?

About a year ago, you had caught the supposed “love of your life” happily in bed with another. Your friends had understood, at first, your apprehension about dating someone else. As the months progressed though, they became less and less understanding and you had less and less excuses to use. Sara, your friend, had talked you into dating a friend of hers that was “so perfect” for you. He was smart, funny, charming. He was a lawyer at a reputable firm and was looking to make partner within a year. You had exchanged text messages with him and made a plan to meet at a local restaurant for drinks after work. You had even decided to sit at the bar to make it easier for your date to find you but apparently that wasn't an issue anyway. Had he seen you and backed out? You decided not to dwell on it too much. Not being good enough for yet another man in the span of a year was almost too much.

Even the bartender was seeming to take pity on you as he came to check on you every so often. You had started out the evening giving out such a good, positive vibe. Now? Not so much. His voice got softer and sweeter every time he came over, as if he was tending to an injured doe and didn't want to spook you off. At least he was very easy to look at with his neatly trimmed chestnut colored beard and crystal blue eyes. His hair was a little longer in the front and shaped nice and short in the back; it had a little bit of product in it but not enough to be obnoxious. He was tall with slender hips and a built upper torso. Christ almighty, was he built. He probably had no issues lifting the kegs in back for the beers with his broad barrelled shoulders and thick as hell arms. You hoped he didn't notice you staring at him. You didn't know how much more hits your ego could take in one night. Or maybe… you did want him to see you stare. You imagined him lifting you up in those strong arms and taking you over the bar top… Jesus, get a grip! You didn't even know him and already you were left wanting.

“How you doin’ sweetheart.” He came over to check again. You noticed a slightly New England accent that made you melt a little. "Well… I think I'm going to give up the ghost on this and call it. He’s not coming." "Date stood you up?" The man asked, genuine curiosity on his face. "Worse." You admitted, your cheeks flushing slightly. "A blind date." "Ouch… that sucks. If you don't mind me askin', what are you doin' on a blind date anyway? You're too pretty of a girl for all that." "Thanks." You chuckled out an awkward laugh. "Just too busy for actual dates I guess. My friend took pity on me and set it up. It's the first date I've been on in a bit."

You don't know what was making you admit to all this. Maybe it was because he was a bartender and they're used to hearing life stories. Maybe it was because he looked so trustworthy, like you could tell him anything. You were spilling top secrets and you couldn't put your finger on why. He didn't seem to mind though, his kind eyes and sweet smile were trained on you, genuinely interested.

"Hey, you want a coffee or somethin'? My treat." He offered. "I'm Chris, by the way."

He stuck out his hand to you with a smile and you shook it, the feeling of his hand in yours electric.

"Thank you. That's very kind of you, Chris. I'll take tea if you have it." "Comin' right up." Chris nodded as he started to prep your tea.

As he turned back around to set up for your tea, you got a look at the back of Chris. His broad shoulders were even more impressive from the back than the front and it gave way to your imagination of his toned back muscles. He also had an impeccable ass. You bet you could bounce quarters off that bad boy. You shook your head, trying to get your thoughts off of practically a strangers rear out of your mind. You never ogled someone this much before but there was something about him that just drawed you to him.

The next couple of hours seemed to go fast. The two of you talked about everything from your families to hobbies, favorite music, and what movies you thought were terrible and great. The bar was dead so it allowed Chris to put his focus on you and you not feeling like you were getting in the way. You found so many other things in those two hours that attracted you to him even more than physically, if that was possible. Chris was well spoken, kind, and funny. God, was he funny! He had you laughing for a solid 5 minutes, tears streaming down your face, telling stories about the stunts he used to pull with his younger brother Scott. It had begun to feel like more of a connection with him than you had felt for anyone in quite some time. The butterflies that you thought had long ago died, were fluttering furiously in your stomach.

A comfortable silence came between you, where you were both just looking at each other. After a beat, Chris cleared his throat and began wiping down the bar top for the night. He had done most of his closing duties while talking to you and was basically just running out the clock.

"Hey, I only have about 30 minutes left on my shift. Do you wanna maybe go get a drink after this with me?" His blue eyes looking straight into you, making you blush. "Yeah, I'd like that."

His body seemed to ease in tension after that, as if he was waiting for you to say no. For a man who looked like Chris and was so charming and sweet, you doubted how he got told no often. You liked that about him, though. He didn't know that he looked as hot as he did, or at least didn't put on airs about it.

The next 30 minutes seemed to go by at a fairly clipped pace. Servers came up and cashed out their tips, making small talk with Chris as they left for the night. Soon, it was just you and him in the entire restaurant. You got off your chair and went over to the opening of the bartop. Chris met you there, a shy smile on his lips.

"So, what d'you want to drink?" He asked. "You." You murmured.

You took charge, grabbing onto his shirt and pulling him to you, not being able to stand the electricity between the two of you any longer. You had never been so bold, never been so forward with a man before but Chris… God you couldn't help it with him. You kissed his lips hungrily, as you snaked your arms around his neck. He, in turn, put his big hands on your hips and massaged them with his fingertips. He broke away from the kiss with a breath.

"Don't take this the wrong way but I was kind of hoping that your date wouldn't show up so I could be alone with you." Chris chuckled in your ear. "Oh is that a fact?" You giggled. "Well I've been checking you out all night so I'm glad he chickened out too."

You continued kissing him, your hands running down his shoulders, squeezing them gently. Your hands went down the solid wall of muscle on his pecs and abs and you got to the hem of his shirt and began to tug. You both broke the kiss for a second as he helped you take off his shirt. You slid your hands back over his chest, loving the feeling of his chest hairs against your hands, and curled your fingers around the nape of his neck before you went to kiss him again. He stopped you and you looked at him questioningly for a second.

“D’you want this?” He asked, his dark blue eyes bore into you.

Nodding your head, you scraped your fingernails along the nape of his neck. God, he was working you up so much.

“I need you to use your words, sweetheart.” He whispered gravelly in your ear as he nibbled on your lobe, sending a shockwave straight to your core. “Yes Chris, I want you.”

That was all Chris needed to hear. He grabbed your waist and turned you around to face the bar top. He swept your hair from your back to leave wet kisses on your neck, his hot breath leaving goose bumps on you. His hands, wandering achingly slow down your sides, grabbed on the hem of your shirt, and pulled it up, kissing and licking where new flesh was found until the shirt was off of you. You were grinding your heated core into his hips, feeling his erection against you, growing by the second.

“Goddamn, you're so beautiful...” He whispered against your shoulder, giving little kisses and nips.

He wrapped one of his arms around your waist, his hand grabbing your hip and squeezing. You would probably be sore there tomorrow but what a way to get a bruise. His other hand came up and cupped the opposing breast, thumb moving down the fabric of your bra. He drew light circles on your nipple until they were hard as pebbles. You mewled at the feeling, throwing your head back so that it was leaning on his chest, eyes closed and breathing hitched. He had enveloped all of your body in his arms.

The hand that was grabbing onto your waist left and started travelling south towards your aching sex. He cupped your mound in his hands moving fingers over the fabric. You bucked slightly against his hand, craving for movement from him.

“Gonna make you feel so good.” He cooed in your ear as he moved his hands up your skirt, past your panties, and into your folds, feeling how wet you were. You were suddenly glad you wore a skirt. He hummed in approval as he gently stroked your clit. Moaning out, you wrapped an arm around his neck to steady yourself as he kissed and sucked on your neck. He pulled one finger inside you, then another, alternately pumping into you and working on your clit. You could feel the coil in your stomach rapidly tightening as Chris worked on you.

“Oh… god Chris… I-I’m gonna... “ “I got you baby. Let go for me.” The coil snapped as an intense orgasm shook through your body. Screaming out Chris’s name, you rode his fingers coming down from your high until you were back on earth again. “Jesus Christ....”

You breathed out as you turned around and grabbed his face, kissing him deeply, your tongues darting in and out of each other's mouths, passion building again. Your hands dropped from his face and moved down his hard chest and abs, feeling him flex against your fingers. You found his belt buckle and undid that, then unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down, his fly coming undone in the process. Tugging on his boxers, it didn't take long for his manhood to spring free of their confines, standing proud and ready to play, precum leaking out of the tip. He placed his hands against the bartop, giving himself a place to steady himself as you placed a hand around him and started running your hand up and down his shaft. Chris groaned and bucked his hips forward into your hands, his head pressing onto your shoulder.

You stopped stroking him and he whimpered from the loss of contact. You took your hand that was wrapped around his neck and pulled his head close to you, getting his ear right next to your lips. “Need you, Chris. Please.” HIs breath was ragged as he nodded his head. He grabbed your butt and motioned you to jump. You did, wrapping your legs around him. You felt like you were weightless in his arms as he held you. He positioned himself near your entrance and pushed in, you both moaning as you took him in. He felt so big around you; pleasure and pain mixed as you stayed still for a second to get used to his delicious size.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He groaned out, taking a couple of deep breaths so that he wouldn’t climax too early.

Slowly, he started to pump into you, moaning and hot rasping breath on your neck as you weaved your fingers through his hair and tugged on it. You let out little moans as well, your body feeling electric and super sensitive as you felt him going deeper into you until he was at the hilt. You wanted him, needed him to fuck you harder, a storm in your eyes as the full feeling finally washed over you and you craved motion. You scratched a long line up his back with your fingernails, eliciting a growl from him and he picked up the pace, eyes lust blown and needing to reach his peak.

“Yes, fuck yes… right there!” You cried out, throwing your head back in ecstasy. “You like that? You like it, huh?” “God yes, more!”

Still holding onto you, he swiveled around and sat you down on the bar back. He grabbed your right leg and lifted it to rest on his shoulder, allowing him to get a new angle with you. You cried out in pleasure as his dick hit your g-spot over and over and over. You could hear the bottles of alcohol clink beside you as Chris rutted into you.

“I’m so close.” You moaned out, grabbing the bar back with your hands so you could match his thrusts. “Me… too…”

He reached down in between your bodies and rubbed tight circles on your clit with the pad of his thumb. Your back arched, eyes slammed shut, and all you could see was white as another mind blowing orgasm rocked you. You shouted out incoherently with shaky breath, walls clenching around his cock, milking it. Shortly after, he followed, a string of curses and your name leaving his lips as his thrusts became sloppy and his head fell forward onto your chest.

“Wow…” He breathed. “I know... Me too.”

He looked up at you, a small smile forming on his lips.

"So… how's about that drink?"

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TAGS: @angrythingstarlight @cheeseburgersstuff

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fandom #chris evans x reader #chris evans x fem!reader #chris evans x female!reader #chris evans x female reader #real person fiction #rpf #american actor rpf #chris evans smut #bartender!chris evans

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dirt-cup-draco · 5 years ago

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I Never Knew You

Warnings: angst, little bit of fluff, swearing, injury, death of a character

pairings: remus x reader, but focuses on how reader is Sirius’ sister and how that effects them all

“Can I request where the reader is Sirius’ twin sister and he hates her because she’s the perfect child but she tries everything to make him feel included in the family and then when she gets with Remus he feels super betrayed by Remus and maybe they make up at the end idk but angst please ! I love your writing”

“You’re shitting me! Why her?” Sirius exclaimed, his jaw clenched so tightly you were sure his teeth must be turning to powder in his mouth as he glanced between you and Remus- your hands intertwined.

You sighed and looked towards the ground, feet shuffling as you looked at your robes. Slytherin. That’s why your twin didn’t like you. You were everything he didn’t want to be. You were your parents’ star. You were the one they were proud of, you were the one that they cared about. You knew that they were cruel to Sirius because he didn’t have the same ambitions as them but you still loved him, he was your brother, he was family. He didn’t seem to have the same sentiments though.

“I really like her padfoot... C’mon, can’t you be happy for us?” His friend said quietly, pleading. He didn’t want his best friend to be upset with him. James had taken it well, Peter was indifferent. You had both known that Sirius would be upset. It had been years since your brother had felt any type of love towards you.

“Isn’t this a good thing?” You began, “Maybe this way we could spend more time together and get to know each other better, it’s been a while Siriu-” But you were halted as Sirius’ eyes turned cold and dark. His posture turned even more stiff.

“No!” He roared, stomping his foot much like a child would. “I don’t want to spend time with you, or know you. You are just like our horrendous parents and your stupid house! I wish I didn’t know you and I wish I wasn’t your brother!”

Sirius’ words froze you to the spot and Remus was moving before you could stop him. His hand was falling from yours and in two quick strides his fist was connecting with your brother’s jaw. You gasped but still found it hard to breathe. Tears were streaming from your cheeks. Why did he have to hate you so much? Your heart was pounding as you took in the scene. Remus was on Sirius, hand fisted in his collar as they yelled and exchanged punches.

“Stop it! Both of you!” You hollered, voice cracking and making you feel even more pitiful in this moment. Remus froze and sighed, eyebrows still drawn to the center of his forehead. Your heart warmed a bit, knowing he was ready to defend you when Sirius went too far. Yet Sirius looked far from apologetic. He had a venomous glare on his face that made you shrink where you stood. He might as well have used Reducio on you.

Remus shoved him away and was at your side in a moment, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as he guided you from the dorm. You had wanted some privacy with your brother but hadn’t thought about how Remus would have to walk you out of the gryffindor common room. Everyone’s eyes seemed to linger on the green on your robes and no one saw the tears. Why couldn’t they get past your house? Why couldn’t your brother get past it either and why couldn’t he realize you loved him and you weren’t the same as your parents?

Remus was there for you all night as you sniffled in your bed, asking why you couldn’t be better for all of them. You just wished to make everyone happy.

---

“I just don’t think we should see each other anymore...” Remus admitted softly, hand stroking your cheek and tucking your hair behind your ear, you jerked away however. The words felt like a cold bucket of ice had been tossed on you. Things had been going so well, what had happened?

“Why?” You eventually squeaked out. How could he touch you so lovingly yet break your heart in to a million pieces? “Remus please... Did I do something? I can fix it...”

“N-no, Y/N, listen. It’s not you, alright? I just can’t keep going between you and Sirius. Every single time I’m with my best friend I feel like he is about to bite my head off. I didn’t want our relationship to affect my friendship with him. I’m tired of having to choose, I love the both of you...” He admitted.

“And you’re choosing him,” You finished the words he was clearly too afraid to say.

“I’m not choosing anyone-”

“Yes you are! This is why you are dumping me! Because I am not the person my brother wants me to be! Because you can’t see past our difference in house either... If I was in Gryffindor would you be dumping me? You told Sirius you really liked me, but you don’t love me. If you did, you wouldn’t care what house I was in! If my brother loved me he wouldn’t either.” You couldn’t help the hiccups that were accompanying your tears. You had done nothing wrong, had you?

Remus left with very few words to add to your own rant and you felt the finality of it. The truth to your words rang around your common room and you knew that Remus wouldn’t be coming around, nor would Sirius.

Maybe you had to be the slytherin they thought you were. Maybe you had to be the Black they thought you were.

Hexes and spells were being tossed everywhere. Death eaters were surrounded the young kids who had the gall to sneak into the department of mysteries. You were doing the same, but missing on purpose. They were just kids for god’s sake. You couldn’t do anything to harm them. You hardly could believe what you had become. You were sure Voldemort would have seen straight through you by now. Yet here you were, battling kids on the whim of the dark lord.

You weren’t expecting to see your brother however. You had been overjoyed to hear he had escaped from Azkaban. He didn’t hold much love for you, especially now but you still cared for him and Remus. You had mourned when you found out Lily and James had been killed. You weren’t a bad person. But the pressures of your upbringing and the lack of support had driven you into a dark place when you were younger.

You’d made the impulse decision to become a death eater after Remus had dumped you and it had been haunting you ever since. You couldn’t leave. You couldn’t change. You would be killed if you tried or imprisoned and neither sounded pleasant. Seeing Sirius try and protect his godson warmed you from head to toe. He’d always been valiant and caring.

Well, for everyone but you....

Lost in thought momentarily you nearly missed the moment Bellatrix set her eyes on Sirius’ unsuspecting form. Your heart sank to the bottom of your chest as she readied her wand. Your feet skid against the floor uncomfortably as you bolted forward, Harry’s eyes were wide and he prepared a spell aimed for you. You ripped the hood from your head and called out to your brother, arms outstretched in front of you as Harry tried to hit you with Stupefy. Thankfully the spell missed.

You collided with your brother at the perfect moment, knocking him to the ground as Bellatrix spoke the damning words. “Avada Kedavra” . The spell pushed your body through the veil. You were gone.

It took Sirius quite a few moments to understand what had happened. He had been standing, eyes locked with Harry’s as he tried to find a way to get his godson and friends back to hogwarts or grimmauld place, somewhere safe. He wouldn’t let Harry befall the same fate as his parents. Yet he had been distracted until a familiar, yet unsuspected voice was calling out his name at the same time Harry was shouting, “Stupefy!”.

Sirius looked the same direction as Harry was and found you pulling your hood off. His sister was lunging towards him, a determined look on her face. How long had it been? All Sirius knew was Y/N Black was barreling towards him, the dark mark visible as she reached forward. He was about to cast a spell, save himself form whatever attack you might be planning, until your hands were shoving at his shoulders and a light was coursing through the room, connecting with you as you stood in the spot Sirius had been moments before.

He watched your body stiffen and the light leave your eyes nearly immediately as the killing curse hit a target. Your body was then propelled into the veil, body slowing as you passed through. Your eyes were unseeing, your chest unmoving, your heart stopped. How long had it been since he had seen you? And now here you were, sacrificing yourself for him. Facing death in his place.

He was stunned. Maybe it was because you had knocked him to the ground, the breath leaving his lungs abruptly. He knew that wasn’t all it was though. You were a death eater, you were voldemort’s puppet, a great example to your parents. What everyone thought all the children from the Black family would end up being. Yet all he could think of now was how you had pleaded with him back at hogwarts.

You had wanted him to know you. You had wanted him to love you. You had wanted to be siblings again and all he had ever done was shove it right back in your face. He’d done all he could to get Remus to dump you and once that had happened he had gone on happily as you succumbed to the worst parts of yourself and bent under the will of others. He had expected the worst of you. Yet you had proven with a single action you were ten times more brave than him, more forgiving and loving.

Maybe he should have been the slytherin. He should have been the one to die, or at least he had been the intended target. All of these thoughts whirled through his mind until Harry was shoving at his shoulder, trying to get him to stand. “We’ve got to go!” He barely processed it but nodded, scrambling after the boy he had known for a short time and loved like family, but looking back to the woman he had known since before birth and never treated like family.

Sirius wasn’t sure what to feel. How did he mourn the loss of someone he never knew? Instead, he would spend his life mourning the loss of someone he could have known and never took the chance to. He would spend his life regretting that he had treated you the way his parents had treated him. Like a stain. You weren’t so different yet he had pushed you away to where he could never drag you back when you had pushed him away to save him.

#sirius x sister!reader #remus x reader #remus lupin x reader #angst #request #sirius x reader #sirius black #remus x sirius'sister!reader #remus x black!reader #i hope this is alright!

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shijiujun · 4 years ago

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[SPOILERS KIND OF] TLTR2 - Thoughts on the last 10 episodes + EVERYTHING

Ahhhhh the found family trope gets me every single damn time!!! Honestly Zhu Yilong’s TLTR is the best I’ve seen!

Okay first things first, TLTR as a whole was EXCELLENT in terms of characters, script, twists, SETS (wow damn TLTR creeps me out episode after episode) and the whole premise seems a little far-fetched but actually melds together really well. Pacing could be slightly better (HAHAHAHA like Wu Xie was stuck in Warehouse 11 on his own like FOREVER in the first half) but they remedied that with S2, the pacing was spot on and I was literally jumping on my feet EVERY WEEK. Reunions? Check. Xiao Ge badass catwalk from the shadows every time Wu Xie is in danger? Check. TEAM BONDING WITH LIU SANG WHUMP?! CHECK. HAPPY ENDING?!!! CHECK (could have done with an alive Jia Ke Zi to be honest, but we’ll take what we can get).

And one thing TLTR does really, really well is like touching, reminiscing scenes? Even with Er Jing?!!! And of course everytime Pang Zi and everyone else thinks Wu Xie is dying, and when Wu Xie himself thinks he’s literally going to die the next moment, wow the script is amazing?!!! I cried (okay but I admit that I cry really easily) soooo many times?!

On Er Jing - The Mole

The moment when Wu Xie recalls Er Jing saving him when he was younger, and how much he trusted Er Jing, and I do feel so sad for both Er Jing and Wu Xie? Like I don’t believe each moment for Er Jing was spent like scheming and tbf he’s not that good of a schemer, ISTG his greed and glee shows up EVERY SINGLE TIME the second he steps into warehouse 11 and Pang Zi is right, “It’s so obvious it’s Er Jing please.” Wu Xie says it as well - if Er Jing truly was a scheming little bij, he would have been seen throughout the 20 years?! So Er Jing perhaps through the years, did think about Er Shu and Wu Xie as his family, I do believe that. It’s just sad af that he chose treasure that he never saw over riches with Er Shu ya know?!

Not sure if Er Jing and his band of crazy friends are dead or alive? Seems at the last episode Wu Xie asked to send doctors down to treat them, but I guess...

On Liu Sang

In the book apparently Er Jing isn’t the mole but Liu Sang (in a different setting, not the same situation if I recall correctly), but San Shu admits that he was drunk or smth when he was writing the ending and Liu Sang and Xiao Bai ‘disappeared’ LOLOL but San Shu has been supportive always in Liu Sang’s character, so I am soooooo glad my Liu Sang BB is pure, innocent, sometimes scheming, always whump?!! AHHHHH LIU SANG!!!!!

Liu Chang as Liu Sang is fricking amazing damn I LOVE HIS LOOK? Honestly, Liu Chang is my new obsession, I love this man. I really, really do. I love his hair, I love him with glasses, anything tbh.

And he’s so protective of Xiao Bai?!!! LIKE LEGIT GENTLEMAN?!!! The first time when he tried to save Xiao Bai from Boss Jiao’s people in the cave, and then in the last ep, when the black thingys came flying over, he shielded her with his coat?!!! Not that it would have made a difference but damn, my pure, competent bb Liu Sang.

Also Liu Sang still DOES NOT GET HIS HUG FROM XIAO GE ISTG?!!! XIAO GE HUGS EVERYONE BUT HIM. DAMN. I REST MY CASE.

On IRON TRIANGLE + 4th sister Xiao Bai

Wu Xie is amazing. ZYL is damn frickin amazing too, and Chen Minghao as Pang Zi IS GOLD. HE’S SO DRAMATIC ASS?!!! And young Huang Junjie as Xiao Ge, damn. This is the best trio I’ve ever seen. This is the best trio you need. All the brotherhood shit, all the meaningful stares between Xiao Ge and Wu Xie, COME ON!!!!

And also Pang Zi taking care of Xiao Mei?!!! And Xiao Mei calling him dad?!!! I love it. AHAHAHAHA

Xiao Bai, I don’t even know where to begin. I think it’s cute, her and Wu Xie, and when Wu Xie called her and she didn’t pick up and in the last ep when Xiao Bai left him behind to run towards Pang Zi and the rest and Wu Xie’s AFFRONTED LOOK, I think he’s fond of her somewhat too. Although to what degree, in what sense, well... I just think it’s cute (ALSO DID YOU GUYS KNOW THAT MAO XIAOTONG WHO PLAYS XIAO BAI IS THE SAME AGE AS ZHU YILONG?!!! LET THAT FARKING SINK IN. THEY ARE BOTH 32 YEARS OLD OKAY?!!)

Hei Yang Jing, Huo Dao Fu, Li Jia Le, Kan Jian, Xiao Hua

AHAHAHAHA I just wanna laugh at these few - LJL especially was so mean in Warehouse 11 but the moment S2 starts he’s just a cute, clumsy bun bun who keeps getting KO-ed, glad he’s alive tho!!! Kan Jian too, so skinny and crying all the damn time, who loves his boss so much, he’s the cutest. I see a lot of fics shipping Kan Jian and Liu Sang, and tbh, in S1 I did see it quite a bit.

Hei Yan Jing and Chu Chu is frickin alive?!! Damn Xiao Hua, I knew you would have done something. Honestly, if you have so much damn money, and you let Chu Chu go without a fight after warning her that you take HYJ’s request to keep her safe seriously?!!! DAMN THE REVEAL IN THE LAST EP. Hope they meet. Baron Chen is... gosh, I love this man. Also Baron Chen and Huang Junjie were in The Pillow Book tgt and oooooof I love it I love it.

And all of you know just how much I love YOUTIAO DOC?!!! He was such a major side character in the second half of like S2 and I am all for it. His sass, his eye rolls, the way he takes care of Wu Xie and does things for him even tho he grumbles about it?!!! Damn. I need a friend like that.

On Er Shu

Honestly Er Shu was the mastermind in the novel? If I recall, it was his plan basically to get Wu Xie to go to Thunder City to get himself cured, because Wu Xie would not have done it otherwise. In fact, everyone except Wu Xie knew it was Er Shu’s plan to get him to go and that he schemed it all?!!

And when the reveal happened, everyone was like “yeah we knew it was him and that we’re all part of his plan but we didn’t say anything” because no one knew which roles they were playing in Er Shu’s plan?! And then yeah Liu Sang turned out to be a mole but I didn’t manage to see why, but he was kind of a morally ambivalent character? And Wu Xie in the novel at one point said that he believes in the kind of person Liu Sang is and that he’s not all that bad after the reveal, so... anyway, ER SHU WAS MEANT TO BE MORE BADASS THAN THIS?!!!

I’m so sad he was really paralysed ;-; I legit thought when he stood up in Ep 29 it was really him and I freaked out but it was HYJ CRIESSSS

Overall this was definitely a drama of friendship? Forged over creepy tombs that were a mix of Frankenstein, The Mummy Returns, Aliens vs Predator and Indiana Jones?!!! FRIENDSHIP!!!! At the end of it all, Wu Xie found so many new friends that are definitely going to come running the next time they have to find another tomb?

Like I was sad Liu Sang didn’t turn up in the last scene but he’s alive thank god, and you can imagine that the next time they need help, Liu Sang will roll his eyes but turn up?!!! And LJL also maybe?! And HDF, everyone!!!!

One thing I wanna know is what the hell is going to happen to the Wu family business?!!! Wu Xie looks like he not going to deal with the power shit, argh IDK he’s back to hobo-ing with his bros which I guess is best life.

EVERYTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN GREAT IF ER JING WASN’T A MOLE ARGH I’M SO MAD. AND IF JIA KE ZI DIDN’T DIE?!!

I’D WATCH THIS WHOLE DAMN THING AGAIN. 10/10 FOR BROMANCE, FRIENDSHIP, FAMILY AND CREEPY ASS TOMBS.

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the-last-cuddlebender · 4 years ago

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So you just refuse canon and bumi and Kya were lying or were just dumb not to realize what was really happening and perfect dad aang didn’t favor tenzin so much and he wasn’t the special one who got all the trips and time with him and was the favorite and every air nation person didn’t revere him and his mother didn’t adore the baby of the family who gave her grandkids and youre right I had to look it up but pema was o n l y 16 years younger and a man doesn’t leave a long term partner to hook up right away with a girl if there wasn’t something going on before even if maybe they didn’t get close to f#cking or maybe it was the worshiping from her that he liked and it was enough even if he really didn’t have anything going on with her but for you tenzin is this perfect victim who never done anything wrong like aang and who only suffered by everyone else being mean and wasn’t loved enough for your liking but this is your hc and to be fair you can have any you want. Bumi was the oldest and he was a non bender that must have been crushing but he kept being a good person and loving his family. Kya was the middle child who was gay and who probably was a bit confused and a bit lost and still was the most caring person ever to anyone and was always willing to help and who even went to stay with her elderly mother. tenzin was the miracle child who got all his parents attention, an island and grow up to expect to be special and a leader who was rigid on his teaching and rules and was also sort of a shitty teacher who also treated a girlfriend/oldest friend like crap not because of the break up but how he did it. That’s all tenzin not just poor baby defenseless never done anything wrong tenzin but if that’s what you want I’m glad he isn’t as loved as you think he should be because with the bits we got his siblings are much more interesting and even better people

(I assume you’re referring to this post about a previous ask, and I’m happy to discuss)

Hi, anon! There’s considerably more for me to unpack here, so bear with me. I’ll try to keep my response contained to a few points:

some child (< age 12) psychology

Katara and Hakoda’s relationship

some pretty dang neat-o history facts that explain more than you think (because my diploma has to be worth something lmao)

(I’m trying to be concise, so if I sound short, please know that’s not my intention. I just wanna save this from becoming a novel. I also just burnt myself with NaNoWriMo, so it may kindof ramble idk)

To start, I don’t refuse the “canon” of the Kataang family, so take that as you will. I gave my argument completely within the lines of TLOK canon because I figured that was what you were after. And I can make an argument for something while not arguing against the opposition. A good argument should be able to validate itself. I never went after Bumi or Kya, and I never would. I love their characters to bits. I was focusing on Tenzin.

Nowhere in my previous post did I say that Tenzin is a ‘perfect victim’ who never did anything wrong. I’m discussing the reasons why I think his character should be explored and appreciated more. He is an extremely complex character just like the rest of the cast. To box him in as “the favored one” is narrow-sighted at best. He’s human. There’s more to him. He didn’t ask for his lot, but he makes of himself what he can with it, just like Bumi and Kya. He by no means had a cozy time (and he has the stress-lines to show it).

You say that Tenzin was “expect to be special and a leader.” That alone makes me want to know more about him and how he grew up with that weight on his shoulders. That kind of expectation can destroy a person. It’s very a-la the pressures of the first-born in a monarchy crumbling under the stresses of learning to rule. Tbh, I think that’s why Tenzin was written as the youngest, so that the cliché wouldn’t be as obvious.

I have NEVER said that Bumi and Kya were lying or were dumb. I was discussing kid-Tenzin and how/why kid-Bumi and kid-Kya perceived favoritism (all while remaining within the lines of TLOK canon, too). Perception isn’t a bad thing. It’s just someone’s interpretation of the world. Idk if you think there’s a negative connotation to the word, but there’s not. Person A can look at the sky and see the moon and Person B can look at the sky and see a void that makes them feel small and insignificant. It’s just a difference of perception. Just because they’re different doesn’t make one or the other inherently wrong. Different truths are more than capable of co-existing.

FIRSTLY, about Aang passing:

Kya wasn’t the only one to help Katara after Aang passed. Aang left a void in MANY ways, both as a family man and the Avatar. Bumi, being in the military, guarded the world in his stead. Tenzin took up the mantle in the City and on the island. Kya took on the emotional safety-net.

Katara was Aang’s best friend, partner, and second-in-command. She was just as renowned as him. I can imagine the world expecting her to shoulder his burdens in the wake of his passing. She was the Mighty Katara, after all.

ALL of her kids helped her through his passing, in their own way. Being a shoulder to cry on is just one facet, and all three kids helped her beautifully.

Some psychology:

I’ll explain why I think Bumi and Kya perceived favoritism (which every kid does, myself included. It’s natural and somewhat instinctive for siblings) as best as I can. I’m not a psych major by any means, but I can lay down what I know and remember from my classes.

I’m not saying favoritism doesn’t exist in families. I’m talking about family dynamics in situations where favoritism is subjective because it objectively isn’t there. (Others might define favoritism differently, I suppose. But these are my thoughts)

Children (again, I’m talking <12 here) perceive the world differently than adults. They have incredible imaginations and a pretty tame survival instinct. Give a kid one of those mind-bender jigsaw puzzles, and they’ll have a higher chance of success solving it because their minds haven’t grown enough to be constrained by reality. They’re mad geniuses who haven’t been developed enough to be closed off from the possibilities. That’s what makes childhood so precious.

That’s why even Gyatso wanted to wait until Aang was older to learn he was the Avatar. You have to let the mind grow and fall and dust itself off before you fence it in. This doesn’t discredit or underestimate kids, either. They are extremely capable. I’m just talking about their lesser known psychology.

“Developed” is also a word that doesn’t have negative connotation here. I’m speaking clinically. Some cognitive and executive brain functions aren’t developed until 25. It doesn’t devalue ability or understanding. It’s just a word.

Kids internalize things differently than adults, especially when it comes to interpersonal relationships. Perceived favoritism among siblings (in situations where there objectively isn’t favoritism, of course) is a classic example. Kids need only be a few years apart for this to be seen. If a two-year-old gets a younger sibling, they can regress to breastfeeding because of the perceived favoritism they see being given to the youngest. Mom isn’t going to let the other kid starve, but the kid doesn’t know that.

This isn’t just in infants, though. And as it can be seen with the Kataang kids (they were all kids when Tenzin went on the trips with Aang, and kid-Tenzin is my focus here): Bumi and Kya don’t ‘know’ that Aang is saving time for them, too, when he isn’t there. All they see is Dad gone with Tenzin and leaving them behind. And by ‘know’, I don’t mean to insult their intelligence. They comprehend why, but their instincts don’t. Siblings have a lot of strange instincts, not just Cain Instinct. Object permanence is critical until critical and abstract thinking are properly developed. Before then, it’s a “I believe what I can see” mindset (in the simplest terms...I don’t wanna wax eloquent about the nuances of it rn. I can see people taking this as me discrediting kids, but I’m not. I’m just trying to explain the Point B missing between Points A and C presented in the show).

Katara:

Children don’t start developing abstract thinking until about age 12. It’s part of their cognitive development. That’s when they start developing critical thinking (and scientific method and etc.) and the understanding of relationships between verbal and nonverbal ideas. Before then, seeing dad take their youngest sibling on field trips would 100% feel unfair, no matter how the situation would be explained to them. They literally can’t understand it.

***Katara: If you want an example, look no further than when Katara confronts Hakoda in The Awakening. Katara knew Hakoda had to go when he did (2 years before the show, by the way, making her 12). She really, really does understand, even when she’s older. But it still hurts, and she doesn’t know why. That’s because the damage has been done. She perceived his leaving differently when she was younger and it internalized differently as a result. She feels a little abandoned even though she knows Hakoda didn’t and why he had to go. Its affects don’t go away, though (as seen in the invasion).

I never said that Kya’s and Bumi’s feelings would go away or were untrue to begin with. It was real to them, and that’s all that matters, just like Katara’s feelings being real to her is all that matters. Hakoda understands that. Aang would, too.

Is that Aang’s fault? It depends on what your definition of a good dad is and whether or not you give him room to make mistakes. Personally, I think he’s a great dad to all three of his children, even in the canon of TLOK. He just isn’t given a proper analysis in the show.

Time spent together does not equal time spent loved. Otherwise, school teachers would be more of a parent(s) to a kid than their actual parents.

The acolytes:

The acolytes of The Southern Air Temple being all “Avatar Aang had more kids?” and completely side-lining Kya and Bumi is not in any way a testament of Aang’s or Katara’s characters. That’s the acolytes’ characters. Aang and Katara have no control over what the acolytes do/do not want to believe or think, no matter how many times they would have corrected them. They fangirl over the airbenders in the scene you’re referring to. Even the fangirls in the comics completely side-lined Katara as Aang’s “first girlfriend.” Their behavior in TLOK never surprised me.

Teacher!Tenzin:

Tenzin being a poor teacher was a good thing. It meant he could grow with his equally-poor student so they would become something better together, as mentor and pupil. I found that idea for growth to be pretty darn cool.

Devaluing the opposition:

“The bits that we got his siblings are much more interesting and even better people” objectively, sure, I could agree, but if I met an interesting and awesome person for a short window of time, I wouldn’t believe they were interesting and awesome 100% of the time. Bits of a person do not define their character. Every person has a capacity for just as much good as evil—it’s a variable that stretches equally in either direction.

*********************************************************************

History-fun-time with the-last-cuddlebender woohoooooo

(a.k.a. I’ll address my thoughts on the “Tenzin being given the temple” and Tenzin-Pema situations, as you’ve presented them, as delicately and concisely as I can)

Importance of different generations:

If we go on the theory that TLOK mirrors more than just the industrial shifts of the real-world at the turn of the 20th c., then the age difference between Tenzin and Pema isn’t abnormal. (It wouldn’t be abnormal until even the early 1990s.) I have to use some anecdote to explain this, so bear with me:

Their age gap is strange to us because we’re used to things progressing so quickly. History as it’ll be written about the generations from the mid-90s onward will be very, very tricky. Generations now-a-days aren’t as easily defined because of the colossal leaps in technology from the past twenty or so years.

Loosely, a generation is a group of people defined by relatively the same “changes” that happened in their lifetime (or whose effects affected their early development). There have been way too many changes in technology (which we know has a much stronger effect on a person’s early development now than ever before) in recent decades for that formula to hold up anymore, otherwise there would be a new generation every 4 years.

An age gap like Tenzin’s and Pema’s feels so much stranger to us because our generations are so tightly layered. 4 years could mean a world’s difference when, back then (and I explain what I mean by “back then” further down), it didn’t change much on the dating scene. Life was more or less the same as they both grew up. It was far slower to change. And everyone in TLOK was growing up in the void of post-war for several decades. The technology jump didn’t (arguably) happen until just before Asami (if still holding up the comparison to modern day), so an age gap even in-universe wouldn’t be abnormal at the time they were dating.

(Even my parents got married at almost the exact same ages as Tenzin and Pema, the only difference being that my mom was 26 not 25. Most people I know are in the same boat. It’s just a generational disconnect)

Kya, Bumi, and Katara weren’t kicked out so Tenzin could be “given” the island (needs time period explanation):

I know TLOK says it got its inspiration from the 1920′s (the inspirations are there), but, if I were to date it, I would say that it’s moreso set in the mid 40′s-ish. (Kuvira ESPECIALLY reminds me of a not-as-known-as-they-should-be person from that time).

Among others, the size of the radios and Tenzin/Pema sleeping in one bed are some easy hints to me about TLOK being set in the mid-40s (if we’re using New York City as the template for Republic City).

Even in the time of FDR’s earliest Fireside Chats, the radios were monsters that had to be kept in the corner of the living room. Towards the mid-40′s, commercial radios were becoming compact, and the radios in TLOK are pretty darn small.

The Cathedral Radio used in TLOK wasn’t created in mass in the real world until 1933, and people didn’t have the means or money to replace their massive radios with smaller ones until (arguably) after the New Deal (1933-1939). Thus, I say the 40s.

Tenzin/Pema sleeping in the same bed also supports this time period because it wasn’t uncommon for couples to sleep in separate beds leading up into the “I Love Lucy” era of the 50s (the separate beds were for too many reasons to talk about here because they were a fad--for even medical reasons--for about a century).

^^^setting the time period is needed to prove why I think Kya and Bumi left of their own volition, why they would do it, and why it was actually quite normal

Kya and Bumi weren’t kicked out of the temple. In real life, it was a trend up until the mid-40s for families to stay in the familial home, some even long after marriage. After that, however, multiple factors encouraged the want and fostered the need for young adults to leave their home as soon as 18. Kya and Bumi would be influenced just the same given the parallels with the time period.

Not all families did. The big (mostly industrial) cities were the first to do this. TLOK mirrors this with Bolin and Mako’s family staying together.

Republic City, like New York City, was years ahead of these kinds of changes, so they started the one-bed shift and kids leaving the home just before the 50s. (This isn’t to disregard the cultural influences bellying the four nations. I know that familial homes are a characteristic common to Asian cultures since the US is more oft to sending elderly into nursing homes and such--and I’m having a blast learning about Asian culture since my specialty in college was medicine in Europe and the West--, but, here, I’m working on the assumption that the world in TLOK is migrating towards a Republic City standard, and the comics seemed to be hinting at that from as soon as just after the war, not to mention in TLOK.)

Again, kids leaving the home at the age of 18 is a very new thing that’s pretty specific to the US (in the time the trend first started) because of the new opportunities that were so suddenly afforded to younger people post-war. These opportunities were in all areas of life, not just economic (economic arguably being the least contributing factor imo), but that’s a historical essay for another time.

My point is, kids leaving the familial home began as a choice in a post-war (100-year war, in TLOK’s case) world that encouraged them to do so.

Bumi and Kya were not kicked out so Tenzin could be “given” Air Temple Island. Bumi joined the military, and Kya traveled the world. They CHOSE to leave because there was opportunity to do so (that hadn’t been there for 100 years). They wanted to find their own destinies (and be the nomads they were born as...I always found it to be a great irony that Tenzin, being the poster-child to carry the legacy of the Air Nomads, never really got the chance to be a nomad. It’s sad, really, and potentially another reason why Aang took him on one-on-one trips since he knew Tenzin would be stuck with his legacy?).

Katara (again): As for Katara leaving the island, I believe that, among other reasons, Katara left Republic City because the light pollution made it difficult to see the stars she had grown up with. In real life, the Milky Way used to be visible to the naked eye everywhere in the world, and I think that change would be reflected in TLOK by default. Katara would probably find comfort in something as consistent as the stars and the Aurora lights in her old age. Plus, the city was probably too loud for her, and snow muffles sound pretty darn well.

TO BE CLEAR: This is not a justification. This is an explanation. I’m taking no “side”, here, because I’m not invalidating the opposition to validate my own. These are just my thoughts for how I see Point A becoming Point C in a way that keeps in line with TLOK canon.

*********************************************************************

Final thoughts:

You and I “perceive” Tenzin and his family differently, anon, and that’s okay. That’s just our interpretations of the show. I’m not calling for Bumi and Kya to be torn down so Tenzin can be uplifted. I’m talking about Tenzin (kid-Tenzin) in particular. His character is his character, and his value shouldn’t have to proven by devaluing Kya and Bumi. Likewise, Kya’s and Bumi’s value shouldn’t have to be proven by devaluing Tenzin. Just because they’re “more interesting” than Tenzin doesn’t make them interesting people (meaning that line of logic is flawed. i.e. lesser evil isn’t good because it’s lesser; it’s still evil. They should be interesting if the comparison is taken away, and they absolutely are and for their own reasons). Their characters should able to stand in an isolated argument, and they absolutely do, make no mistake. I love them to pieces, and nothing I’ve said about Bumi and Kya has made them inferior. I love them to death and have written more about them than Tenzin. It wasn’t until I started thinking about Tenzin that I realized his potential.

Tenzin, Kya, and Bumi were never “given” anything, and I doubt they would ever want it to be. They all had it rough, and they all deserve love. Bumi fought for a name in the military. Kya carved out her place in the world. Tenzin dug in his roots and planted the seeds for a garden he thought he wouldn’t be alive to see grow.

Me believing Tenzin should be appreciated more does not mean I believe Kya and Bumi should be appreciated less.

...just like Aang giving Tenzin one-on-one attention does not mean he didn’t give Kya and Bumi one-on-one attention, too:)

Again, this isn’t an attack on any character, person, or fandom! I’m not a psych expert, either, and I apologize if it sounds like I’m delegitimizing kids and their experiences. I’m trying to do the opposite. I can go more into detail about Kya and Bumi, but this post is a novel already and I'm too burnt out to add more.

I’m just trying to give Tenzin as much love as Kya and Bumi🥰 I love all the cloud babies equally (as I should😤), and I wanted to toss out my two cents for discussion because I don’t see the cloud babies being loved equally in fandom (kindof ironic)

If there is some hidden childhood!tenzin content please hmu I beg🥺

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ghost-in-the-stalls · 4 years ago

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your hc about mary please🤲🏻🤲🏻

Aw thanks so much for asking!! Idk if you're the same anon that asked about Tilda or a different one, but I appreciate you just the same 😍 no one has interacted with the Tilda post yet from what I can see so idk if people care about this in general but im glad you do! And I'd love to share regardless.

Once again this'll probably be long so it's going under a cut. Cw for normal aftg stuff but then also a little human trafficking mention in the beginning and general abuse/neglect both physical and emotional.

And once again this is in no way to excuse Mary's shitty behavior. She and Tilda were both abusive and terrible mothers and this is more just an exploration of the character and her mentality than anything else. I just love character depth.

Finally, I apologize if this isn't very well worded. I'm pretty tired but I dont like editing myself lmao I'd rather just get this out now. I think I get my points across clearly enough so I don't care as much about how good or bad the writing is

So Mary's mother was a woman who I consider not only having married into the Hatfords but who was basically like... sold to them as a child. Like maybe she was the illegitimate child of some other wealthy family who happened to owe some kind of debt to the Hatfords. And the Hatfords had only one son and were struggling to have another, but were desperate to keep the family line going. So they took this baby in exchange for forgiving a debt, and raised her to one day marry their son.

So this girl (whose name I've decided is Marion for some reason) is raised as a member of the family but like... slightly less. Treated as more of an object than a person. They basically only gave her enough of an education for her to get by, and made sure she knew from a young age that her sole purpose in the family was to marry their son (let's call him Samuel).

So you can imagine she didn't grow into a very happy woman. But she filled her role. She married Samuel Hatford, gave him 3 kids, and then pretended to stay out of the way. Stuart was the oldest, Mary in the middle, and I hc they had a younger sister as well. Don't ask me why. That just popped into my head one day and now I can't imagine otherwise.

So this family dynamic was fucked from the beginning. See Marion filled her role, but she had plans. In raising her children, she gave a great deal of care and attention to Stuart as he was the eldest and the only son. He was to inherit the family business upon his father's death or retirement. And she wanted to make sure she was taken care of properly in her old age. So she made Stuart feel as loved and doted on as she could.

Her daughters served her no purpose, so they got very different treatment. Mary especially was affected by this. The youngest daughter was able to generally slip under the radar and find her own niche in the world (married into a powerful wealthy family through a man she genuinely loved and that was already more than anyone needed or expected from her).

But Mary. She felt her mother's cold shoulder on a very deep level. Their father wasn't exactly a family man- couldn't be bothered. And here was her mother, so plainly and openly playing favorites. Stuart would get hugs and soft words while Mary would- on a good day- get slapped for even opening her mouth. See Mary and her sister were never meant to have any real power in the family. So what did it matter to Marion what grudges they held against her?

So enough years go by and Marion decides its taking too long for her husband to retire. So she takes matters into her own hands. Starts slowly slipping poison into his meals in very small doses until he's too weak to fight back when she slits his throat. She doesn't hide what she did. She doesn't need to. When Stuart takes over at 22 years old, he can't find it in himself NOT to protect her.

But I'm getting carried away. So Mary was now in a pretty weird spot. Stuart being in charge gave her a bit stronger footing in the family (they'd always had a very close relationship despite their mother's attitude), but she was still lower rung. She still suffered at the hands of her mother's emotional neglect and manipulation. And she was getting tired of it.

In comes Nathan Wesninski. See the thing I imagine with Nathan is that he is actually incredible charming. His knives can only get him so much when there are people he can't reach to cut up. And when his rising empire starts doing business with the Hatfords, he and Mary latch onto one another very quickly.

They each have their own intentions in the relationship and neither of them are blind to that. But it wasn't an arranged marriage. See Mary saw Nathan as her ticket up and out. She knew he was vying for power and she knew he was fully capable of getting it. I wouldn't go as far to say they were ever in love- I don't think either of them were ever really capable of that- but Mary definitely had some strong faith in what their relationship could be.

Now, when she looked forward, she finally saw herself on top. She saw her and Nathan standing side by side. That power that had always been out of reach for her? It was now in sight, and she definitely was blinded by that. She didn't see what Nathan really was until she was in too deep.

Stuart and the younger sister had disapproved of Mary and Nathan being together from the beginning. Being in business with him, Stuart knew what Nathan really was and how much he could drag Mary down. Their younger sister had just learned to be much better at reading people. But it didn't matter what they said. Mary had her plan and nothing was going to take it from her.

Mary's commitment to marrying Nathan and Stuart's blatant disapproval of him created a deep rift between them. They had always been very close, but Mary saw his interference as an attempt to keep her in her place. She was stubborn and refused to back down. By the time she and Nathan got married, her and Stuart were barely on speaking terms.

Now the thing is, Nathan knew what he wanted out of Mary. And he also knew that once he had her, she wouldn't be able to go anywhere until he got what he wanted.

It didn't take too long for Mary to come to understand that what they had was never and would never be a partnership. She was a tool to him. And by the time she had Abram, he was already beating her into submission and openly fooling around with Lola on the side.

But now she was stuck. Their marriage may not have been arranged, but it was still a business deal. And even if it wasn't, Nathan wasn't going to let her go anywhere.

Once it became clear that Abram wasn't going to make an appropriate heir for the Wesninski business and Nathan tried to sell him to the Moriyamas, Mary decided she'd had enough. She was going to get out one way or another.

Now here's the thing. We know what Mary was like with Neil when they were on the run. We know how abusive and controlling she was. And she could say it was for his own good all she wanted. But ultimately, it was all about power. She had been beaten down from the very start of her life. She'd been left in the dust, bloody and bruised, while those around her rose to a power that was always just out of her reach.

But now it was just her and her son. And they may not even have the luxury of being real people anymore, but damn if she was going to lose the one thing she was able to call hers- the one thing in the world she actually had power over.

Because that's really all it's ever about isn't it? Mary Hatford wasn't capable of loving anything or anyone. The people who'd raised her and made her who she was had never taught her how to do that. And maybe the fierce protectiveness she had over Abram was the closest she could get to it. But really she just ultimately became the same thing she had always been fighting against. Now it was her own heavy and swift hands doling out punishment to a misbehaving child. Now she herself was the one getting the last word and making all the decisions. Now she had someone following her every command.

It eventually became clear to her that she very likely would die sooner or later at the hands of Nathan and his men. She could only run so far and for so long. But even in her death, she knew she would never let them take what was hers. She never took Abram to Stuart because the break in their relationship was beyond repair at this point. But she still would prefer Abram eventually ended up in his protection than at the end of Nathan's knife. But until these things came, she took Abram and kept running. The more days they ran, the more days she had of power over him and freedom from everything else. The more able she was to ensure that Abram would keep running after her death; that he'd never fall under anyone else's power and that her voice would be the only one left in his head at the end of each day.

If she could see where he'd ended up, she'd be furious (and she'd be surprised at her own fury, as introspection wasn't something she indulged in often). He was never meant to live. He was never meant to move on from her memory or to leave her dying request behind.

But, at the same time, good for him for finding his own strength and place in the world. Because of course it could only happen once she was gone.

---

So thats my take on Mary. Once again, she was a piece of shit just like Tilda. This is not to do anything other than explore the character and give her complexity. I do genuinely believed she "loved" Neil in the only way she could ever be capable of loving anyone. But it wasn't love. It was possession. And good on both him and Andrew (and Aaron and Nicky for that matter) for being able to slowly learn to heal from the abuse they suffered at the hands of their parents.

Thanks so much again for asking!! It means a lot and I love to share my headcanons 😊❤

#aftg #aftg meta #mary hatford #stuart hatford #neil josten #nathan wesninski #nathaniel wesninski #abram hatford #tfc #my writing

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tights-orno-deal · 3 years ago

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BASIC QUESTIONS

First name? Danielle

Surname? Dennison

Middle names? Olivia

Nicknames? Dani

Date of birth? July 15

Age? 18

PHYSICAL / APPEARANCE

Height? 5’2

Make up? Nothing crazy. She usually keeps it fairly natural.

Tattoos? A secret star on her thigh that only she knows about.

Type of clothes? A lot of black and pink and soft goth aesthetics.

How do they wear their clothes? She wants them to be comfortable and able to be moved around in.

Are they in good health? She’s in relatively good health, yes, but mostly thanks to age. She doesn’t work at it.

PERSONALITY

What words or phrases do they overuse? She probably says “like” too often for not being a valley girl.

Do they have a catchphrase? Not that I’ve noticed.

Are they more optimistic or pessimistic? Optimist, 100%.

Are they introverted or extroverted? Extroverted, 100%.

Do they ever put on airs? Nah, what’s the use? Everyone makes mistakes, everyone looks dumb. You should own it and own those things that make you human.

What bad habits do they have? She has a real problem with not listening when people give her good advice.

What makes them laugh out loud? Most everything. She’s easy to get laughing.

How do they display affection? Soft touches, shutting up to listen to you.

How do they want to be seen by others? A badass bitch who takes no shit, lol. Really, just someone worth being around.

How do they see themselves? She likes who she is for the most part. She had always believed she was courageous, but the witches have flipped her view, unsure about what her pervasive fear of them means.

How are they seen by others? I think people see her as fun, wholesome, cute… she hates 2 out of 3 of those descriptors though, because she feels like people don’t take her seriously because of them.

Strongest character trait? Courage

Weakest character trait? Selfish

How competitive are they? Not really all that competitive

Do they make snap judgements or take time to consider? Depends on the day.

How do they react to praise? She has some sort of goofy response and a compliment back, shift the attention off her.

How do they react to criticism? It takes a moment, she doesn’t just accept it instantly, but she can eventually come around to it.

What is their greatest fear? Being unable to stop when something puts her family or Binx in danger.

What are their biggest secrets? I don’t really think she has secrets. She usually is fairly open about things. There are things she has yet to tell herself… but mostly she says what she thinks and feels.

What is their philosophy of life? The beauty of life is in the people you share it with. Choose wisely and be a person that can make their life beautiful as well.

When was the last time they cried? Probably at multiple points while Binx was missing.

What haunts them? She said, ‘idk ghosts?’

What will they stand up for? You, your dog, your dog’s cousin… she is willing to fight when someone needs it.

Who do they quote? Celebrities probably.

What is their sinful little habit? ‘It should be a sin to be this awesome’

What sense do they most rely on? Hearing

How do they treat people better than them? She likes to think that she treats everyone the same, but she is easily awed by people she thinks are great.

How do they treat people worse than them? Unless you move against her, she tries to treat you with respect.

What quality do they most value in a friend? Just love her.

What do they consider an overrated virtue? Obeying rules.

If they could change one thing about themselves, what would it be? She would be less afraid of the witches.

What is their obsession? All things witches. She thinks about witches, dreams about witches, reads about witches. She is unsure where the lines between terror, fascination, and envy are.

What are their pet peeves? When people don’t listen to her, especially her brother.

FRIENDS AND FAMILY

Is their family big or small? Who does it consist of? Just her, her mom and dad, and brother.

What is their perception of family? She loves her family and depends on them, but she firmly believes that that same kind of family can be found in other places. It’s not all about blood.

Describe their best friend. Binx is certainly the yin to her yang sometimes. He’s deep and contemplative, made up by centuries of experiences and layers that she really is only starting to peel back. She feels their connection goes deeper than that of friends, though. This is her person, her soul mate in life. Her other bestie is Fran. Their immortality has allowed her to create a friend in them that you normally might not see with their vast age difference.

Describe their other friends. Dani’s type is apparently immortal hot men, and she is not complaining. She surrounds herself with them. Outside of that, when it comes to friends her own age, it’s more of a mix of personalities. She’s sweet, but mischievous, which allows her to be friends with people like Logan and Aurora and remain completely herself. She likes having a friend for all occasions.

Describe their acquaintances. Dani probably has acquaintances, but she’s quick to call you her friend, regardless of how the other person might see it.

Do they have any pets? She needs a new cat, preferably a regular one this time.

PAST AND FUTURE

What was your character like as a baby? As a child? I think her personality has been fairly steady throughout her life. She’s always been relatively upbeat and a troublemaker.

Did they grow up rich or poor? Middle class.

Did they grow up nurtured or neglected? Nurtured.

What is their greatest achievement? I don’t know if she has one yet. In writing her, I like to take the mentality that until the moment the witches were released, her life was very ordinary. She wasn’t rich, or poor, or had anything big and dramatic happen to her. All her greatest achievements as well are yet to come.

What was their first kiss like? It was fine. Nothing to write home about.

What are their ambitions? She currently is really into learning about magic and really getting to a place of understanding of it. Partly she thinks it will help her fight against the witches, but beneath that, she hopes understanding magic will make it less frightening.

What advice would they give their younger self? “It’s going to be scary but it’s going to be worth it. Just be brave.”

What smells remind them of their childhood? Salt air

What was their childhood ambition? To be Doctor Dolittle

Did they have an imaginary childhood friend? Oh, for sure. His name was also Max, like her brother, was the same age, but was always there to play with her.

When was the last time they were crushed with disappointment? When she thought Binx had left her.

What past act are they most ashamed of? Unleashing the witches onto the world. She wouldn’t take it back, because it brought so much to her life, but she is aware of the danger of it. It’s a complicated feeling that she struggles to navigate.

LOVE

Do they believe in love at first sight? I think she does in the way that most young people have an impractical idea of what love is, but she would say that she doesn’t believe in love at first sight though.

Are they in a relationship? Not at the moment.

How do they behave in a relationship? She’s all about the fun aspects of relationships. She loves just goofing off with the person, is constantly looking for excuses to be around them, trying to make them laugh and have fun with her.

When did you character last have sex? A couple years ago.

What sort of sex do they have? The inexperienced kind.

Has your character ever been in love? Nope

Have they ever had their heart broken? … probably, but only in like, having a deep crush on a guy who doesn’t like her back and how that feels really serious and earth-shattering in that moment when you’re young.

CONFLICT

How do they respond to a threat? She tells her army of hot immortal men… lol, she actually can get a little mouthy when she’s in danger. It’s her defense mechanism.

Are they most likely to fight with their fists or their tongue? Tongue, but she’s not unwilling to fight with her fists. She never has, but she could.

What is your character’s kryptonite? If someone she loves is in danger, she would probably give the person whatever they wanted.

If your character could only save one thing from their burning house, what would it be? Her cat.

How do they perceive strangers? She used to be very open with strangers, and to an extent, she still is. She’ll tell you her life story if you get her going. It doesn’t mean she is as willing to trust people as she used to be with the important things.

What is their choice of weapon? Flamethrower, if she’s being given the option. Who would pick anything else?

What living person do they most despise? The witches.

Have they ever been bullied or teased? Nothing serious, I doubt.

Where do they go when they’re angry? Dani is very much a pillow screamer. Her pillow, your pillow, if she gets pissed, no pillow is safe from being screamed into.

Who are their enemies and why? The witches. They might give a damn about Dani but she feels its her duty to keep people safe from them. She doesn’t know how to do that yet, but she’s learning. She’s ready to make them give a damn.

WORK, EDUCATION AND HOBBIES

What is their current job? Student.

What are some of their past jobs? She once wore an awful hat and sold corndogs on a pier before they moved here.

What are their hobbies? She loves a good adventure as much as she loves digging into Howl’s collection of magic materials.

Educational background? Standard public education.

Intelligence level? Average.

Do they play a sport? Are they any good? She played soccer through high school and was decent enough at it to make the All-State team.

What is their socioeconomic status? Middle class.

FAVORITES

What is their favorite animal? Cat.

Which animal do they dislike the most? Monkeys because one pulled her hair once on vacation.

What place would they most like to visit? Egypt

What is the most beautiful thing they’ve ever seen? The rare and elusive Binx smile

What is their favorite song? Whistle by Blackpink

Music, art, reading preferred? Music

What is their favorite color? Black

What is their password? Dani101was101here101

Favorite food: Pizza

What is their favorite work of art? She is not that discerning.

Who is their favorite artist? She only knows the biggies. That Michelangelo seemed to know what he was doing.

What is their favorite day of the week? Friday

POSSESSIONS

What is in their fridge? Leftover pizza, bottles of water, a thing of whiskey hidden behind some Cokes.

What is on their bedside table? Alarm clock, phone charger, lamp

What is in their car? Phone charger, some takeout trash in a garbage bag

What is in their purse or wallet? Wallet, phone, some treats for when Binx is in cat form, and also candy for both of them when he isn’t

What is in their pockets? Keys

SPIRITUALITY

Do they believe in the afterlife? She would have said no before now, but she’s at this point where she really doesn’t know what to believe about anything. She’s searching for the answers to these questions that will help the world make sense to her again.

What are their religious views? Searching.

What do they think heaven is? If there is a heaven, it is probably pretty close to the Christian version – but she would also tell you she really doesn’t know what other people believe besides so she might not be the best to ask.

What do they think hell is? Fire.

Are they superstitious? I think she’s probably fairly superstitious at this point in her life. If magic is real, then all bets are off on what else is or is not.

What would they like to be reincarnated as? Something cool, like a falcon.

How would they like to die? Quick and painless, please.

What is your character’s spirit animal? Probably a chipmunk or something along those lines.

What is their zodiac sign? Cancer

VALUES

What do they think is the worst thing that can be done to a person? Abandonment

What is their view of ‘freedom’? I highly doubt she’s given this much thought. Just being free to do what you want.

When did they last lie? Maybe a couple days ago… little white lies, nothing serious.

What’s their view of lying? If something is serious, it is best not to.

When did they last make a promise? Earlier today? She throws promises around like softballs.

Did they keep or break their last promise? Keep. She always tries to keep them.

DAILY LIFE

What are their eating habits? I mean, probably not great. She’s a college student, so a lot of Ramen and pizza.

Describe their home. Just an average middle class home. Her own room that’s done up with posters and black and purple.

Are they minimalist or a clutter hoarder? Clutter hoarder.

What do they do first thing on a weekday morning? Coffee.

What do they do on a Sunday afternoon? Lay around in her room with Binx or at Howl’s shop.

What do they do on a Friday night? She loves a good party.

What is the soft drink of choice? Dr. Pepper

What is their alcoholic drink of choice? Whiskey and coke (see: what’s in her fridge)

MISCELLANEOUS

What or who would your character dress up as for Halloween? She loves Halloween and a great monster costume.

Are they comfortable with technology? I would say she has the average teen grasp of technology.

If they could save one person, who would it be? Binx or a member of her family

If they could call one person for help, who would it be? Howl seems the most capable

What is their perception of redemption? Everyone is capable of redemption, but she’s aware that giving people that second chance is easier said than done.

What would they do if they won the lottery? Put it all in a room and then roll around in it.

What is their favourite fairytale? Jack and the Beanstalk

What fairytale do they hate? Snow White

Do they believe in happy endings? She believes some people get them and hopes that she’s one of the lucky ones that does.

What is their idea of perfect happiness? She’s sitting in a room, surrounded by the people she loves, all laughing, all talking, all enjoying each other.

What would they ask a fortune teller? She would be completely unable to narrow that down. She’d just be like, tell me everything you see!!

If your character could travel through time, where would they go? Dinosaurs, baby!

What sport do they excel at? Soccer

What sport do they suck at? Basketball

If they could have a superpower, what would they choose? Invisibility

#watask

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imaginepirates · 5 years ago

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Characters Being Vulnerable

Alright, so I’m kinda doing a series here where I give headcanons about the characters being vulnerable, suggested by @nightrainn2. She’s already requested Beckett, James, Jack, and Carina. If you’d like to see any more, drop ‘em in my inbox!

Beckett:

The first time he was vulnerable with you was when he told you about his family. It took a really long time for him to be able to trust you with this, so even the fact that he was talking to you about them really meant that he trusted you. More than anyone else.

His childhood was awful, and I mean seriously horrid. His father was cruel and treated him horribly because he was different from his brothers. He was exceptionally smart, but he was still looked down upon. Even his classmates hated him; they were jealous of how smart he was. His family looked at him like an extra mouth to feed. His father critiqued him for not having the same physique as his brothers. (I heard somewhere that he was overfed to make him taller, idk if that’s true though. I have to read The Price of Freedom at some point).

The only people he loved in his family were his mother and sister. They showed him kindness, so he was very attached to them. Unfortunately, they both died, so he really doesn’t like to talk about them.

One night, he remarks that you remind him of his sister. It takes you by surprise; you’ve never heard him mention his family before. You ask him what about you makes him think of his sister, and he kind of freezes. He doesn’t want to go down that road. He’s still emotional over her death, having not mourned her properly, and the scars his family left him with still seem too fresh.

He stares at you for a moment and mumbles something about how you’re kind to him like his sister was. He can’t look at you, though, as he says it. He can feel tears pricking at his eyes. The more he thinks about it, the more you remind him of her. You cup his face with a hand and make him look at you, only to see glassy eyes.

Needless to say, you’re shocked. You’ve never seen him anywhere close to tears. He rarely shows emotion; it’s a battle getting him to so much as smile. (When he does it’s radiant, by the way). When you see how upset he is, you wrap your arms around him and let him bury his face in the side of your neck. You have no idea what to do when you feel him shaking, so you stay put, hoping that you’re a comfort to him. The fact that he’s crying concerns you because you know something awful must’ve happened for him to feel this way.

He’s humiliated to be crying in front of you. It was drilled into him from youth that tears were a sign of weakness; that emotion was a sign of weakness. No matter how ashamed he is, he can’t get himself to let go of you. The way your arms have wound around him make him feel more loved that he’s felt in years.

When he’s done crying, you stand like that for a moment, holding each other. He wipes the tears from his face and sits down, knowing he owes you some sort of explanation. So he takes a deep breath and tells you everything. He explains how awfully the men in his family treated him, and how much he cared about his mother and sister. He takes a good hour or so detailing his early life. From what you learn, by comparing you to his sister, he’s comparing you to one of the two only figures of love and compassion he’s ever had. You’re touched by this, obviously, and can feel tears of your own falling down your cheeks.

You spend the next few hours after that together, often holding hands and staying physically close. He’s thankful that you took his emotional side so well; more thankful than he can communicate to you. He’s happy that he can trust you with his vulnerability and emotions, allowing him to really open up around you.

This wasn’t his only vulnerable moment, either.

His father and brothers left him with some serious body image issues, so he doesn’t eat that much, and he’d rather be caught dead than have anybody see him even partially unclothed.

Not to mention, he has horrible scarring from when he was captured by pirates when he was younger. They were allowed to torture him, and he ended up with lacerations all across his back. (This is a theory of mine that I will die upon, I swear).

All in all, he hates his appearance, and doesn’t want to share it with anyone.

Being married to you, though, means that he’ll have to undress in front of you at some point in time, and he’s dreading it. You give him the space he needs, though you find yourself a little confused as to why he won’t undress in front of you. You’re married, after all.

You don’t ask, knowing he won’t want you to. Instead, the matter comes up in an altogether different way. You’re having a wonderful time distracting him from his work in his office by kissing him, and he’s thoroughly enjoying the distraction. You manage to slip him out of his waistcoat and cravat, and you begin to undo the laces on his shirt before he catches on.

His hands fly up to catch yours, and he looks at you with what you slowly realize is fear. What he’s afraid of, you can’t say, but you can see how uncomfortable he is.

“I’m not sure you want to undress me,” he whispers. “I’m not… in the prime of my youth, exactly.”

You give him a soft kiss and stare him in the eye, making sure you have his attention. Without breaking eye-contact, you untuck his shirt from his trousers, running your hands under it to caress the skin beneath. He gasps, and though he’s afraid you won’t like what you find, he lets you continue. You kiss him again, and again, and everything is surprisingly gentle and loving. Really, you just have to treat him tenderly, and he melts into your touch. You pull the shirt off over his head and trail light kisses across his chest.

He’s feeling really out of his comfort zone, but you’re being sweet, so he doesn’t stop you. He can feel his eyes welling up with tears, and he cries a little, silently. You kiss his tears away when you notice, holding him close.

You trace little patterns into his back, and he has the horrible thought that you’ll see his scars. Maybe you notice them then, or maybe you notice them another day, but when you do, he doesn’t know how you can stand to look at him.

You make him turn around and show you. You gasp when you see, shocked to think that he had to endure something so painful. He takes this as a bad sign and tries to turn around, but you hold him in place. You press feather-light kisses to his skin, right on the scars, letting him know you love everything about him. Everything.

He’s a tearful mess and can’t help thinking he doesn’t deserve you. You can’t help thinking that you’re lucky to have him, knowing that scars like that meant there was always a chance he might have died. When you tell him as much, he completely breaks down. He’s just not used to someone loving him so much.

Allowing him to be vulnerable around you lets him let go of some of the toxic teachings of his past. He’s happier with you in his life. He hasn’t had anyone that takes care of him emotionally, so he loves you desperately and would do anything for you in return.

Ugh. I just have some emotions about this man because his life was messed up.

#potc #pirates #pirate #pirates of the caribbean #beckett #lord beckett #cutler beckett #headcanon #headcanons #drabble #request #requests

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devintrinidad · 4 years ago

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I haven't watched it Akadama Drive the way through. But I have seen a lot of it. It's almost too gorey for me. But the visuals are a real treat and it definitely has the cyberpunk cool factor down. Swindler was a great main character! (I never shipped her with Cutthroat. I knew the psychopath was that. A psychopath and I bet he was going to turn on them at anytime. And he did! Never be distracted by the childish antics pretty boy serial killers!).

I'm interested in the future of AD. I heard the last episode was getting a special Directors cut including a alternative ending. I also heard the AD creators were happy to hear AD is doing well in the west so fans are wondering if that means their hoping to make a S2? I don't keep up with AD news so I'm not sure if that's their intention or not. But I did hear a fan theory that S2 could be about the bad guys using technology to bring at least of the main characters back to life (considering Swindler had a religious themed death and both her and Courier's bodies could easily be recovered. Plus revival through tech is such a Cyberpunk staple) because Brother and Sister are still targets and they were would where to look for them.

So maybe AD still has a bright future ahead with more content to explore the world (I honestly think Hacker could easily be a main character in any sequal).

Onto the CAW/AD verse.

I could totally see 3803 being this epic biker chick.... Who gets lost easily. But because she does all these crazy stunts, her enemies (who don't know her yet) think she's planning everything to confuse them. X D

I could see 1146's akudama name being Bodyguard. Because when he's not acting like one for 3803 and Platelet. He's taking up bodyguard jobs for anyone who needs them. For the right price and reason. If you're a scumbag who hurts innocent people, he'll kill you on the spot. But be nice enough to return the moneyto your corpse. Unless 3803 or Platelet needs something, then he'll strip you of all your dough and leave you penniless. He has a very ruthless rep. But he's so good at what he does, his help is in high demand. Ecspecially for someone who needs a bodyguard they can trust (and they know they aren't or won't act like scum around him to earn his wrath). He's fine with helping criminals. Just not ones who do a lot of harm to innocents or are involved in nasty business like trafficking or something.

Story wise things change up.

The way I see things here is that Cancer is the one secretly in charge and why things are so wrong. He's this absolute monster of a human being who gained immortality hundreds of years ago. He went nuts and caused wars and blew up the moon. He wants all the power and has created societies in his own twisted corrupted image (basically his dream in canon coming true here). But he's noticed after awhile things always go bad under his leadership and nearly everything dies. Instead of starting over again and again. He's decides to find a way to force everyone to become immortal like him so that even if they're killed. They'll have no choice but to come back to life like he does. If he has to suffer this, then so does everyone else.

That's where 3803 and Platelet come in. For decades, Cancer has been collecting and experimenting on people in secret in order to figure out how to gift them with his immortality. 3803 and Platelet are surviving lab rats who managed to escape during a explosion happening in the building. 3803 is the closest he's come to achieving his goal. 3803 would later tell 1146 she has no idea how immortal she is and it scares her to death that she might be unable to die like Cancer. All she knows is that she can take a lot of damage and recover in time. She's been able to age a little. But she hopes she's not being paranoid about looking younger and smaller for her age (Macrophage, another Akudama who knows her secret, tells her it's common for girls like her to look younger then they are and that she has gotten bigger since they first met. But 3803 is still a little concerned). 3803 also has no idea about Platelets status in all this since she's never been badly hurt and she's aged normally. But she's also never gotten sick a day in her life and she was put in the same cell as her. The scientists saying all she needed was a little tweaking and they'd both be closer to becoming their goal.

Ohhh, I didn't even think about 4989 and the others being 1146's enemies. I assumed they'd follow his lead eventually. Say they're dissapointed in him. Because yeah things are corrupt. But that's no reason to become a criminal and abandon their dreams of making the city a better place. They weren't there when he turned traitor so all they've been told is he got beguiled by some witch (3803 gets a very exaggerated and unpleasent rep along the Executioners for turning their top soldier against them. 1146 was already having serious doubts on his own but the organization puts the blame on her regardless). Eventually they get told by a superior officer if they can capture both 1146 and 3803 alive, they'll take 1146 back instead of executing or throwing him in jail. They'll strip him of his Akudama name and only punish him by putting a bomb collar on him until he redeems himself to them. It's not ideal. But for their friend they'll take it. They do eventually find and fight 1146 and even manage to knock him out and tie him up. They're prepared to fight 3803... Until they meet her face to face. From the rumours, they were expecting this buff scary woman who could rip their faces off. Instead they meet this determined but petite girl who looks like she'd hurt herself trying punch them. Even worse she's holding this little scared crying girl calling her big sis in her arms. They're the picture of defenselessness and it's suddenly making them not comfortable with this. This goes two ways: either they decide to cool down for a sec and let 3803 and 1146 explain themselves and then make the choice to leave and become akudamass too. Or, they harden themselves and take her anyway. 3803 promises to come quietly if they let her little sister go (they don't suspect Platelet is the Akadama Bomber). 3803 is hoping if she goes alone, She can at least convince Cancer Platelet died years ago and was a failed test subject. They agree and 3803 has to push Platelet away and yell at her to go (she knows she'll go to Macrophage so she'll be fine) because Platelet knows what's happening and is desperate enough to almost throws a small bomb at them (but 1146 would get caught up in the blast and 3803 glares at her to obey so she doesn't). The WBC squad does feel bad since they're not used to dealing with vulnerable women and children who can't fight back.

When 1146 wakes up in a room with his superior officer telling him he's back and not getting a bomb collar. He's getting brain surgery and it's a surprise what that's going to be. Needless to say, 1146 is pissed beyond words. He's going to be forced to be their top dog somehow again. Platelet is alone and scared. 3803 is going to be carted off to Cancer so Cancer can make things even worse. Needless to say he manages to make his case to his friends who see definitely now know being a Akadama is better then this. Half of them go to rescue 1146 before he gets brain surgery and the others go get 3803 before Cancer can.

That's my idea of it anyway. Cause the WBC squad would actually be really good akadamas.

Now when it comes to 1146 fighting allies a lot. My initial idea was before he left, 1146 was the best of the best alongside NK and Killer T. They were the power trio that stood above the rest with a 100% success rate in missions once all three worked together. But unlike the WBS squad. They stick to their Executioner roles. I see this because in CAW canon, despite being softies inside, both Killer T and NK have this 'don't get chummy with civilians' mentality. Killer T ecspecially getting on 1146 for wanting to interact and go soft with them. In AD verse, NK and Killer T ultimately believe the Executioners are a nessecary evil at worst because the world needs them to be (Idk, you can keep the germs and make them monsters that Executioners have to fight to keep the city save too. Of course all of them are secretly made by Cancer to convince the most 'noble' of Executioners to keep the corrupted status quo). When 1146 left, they took it personally. Particularly Killer T. NK keeps things more professional, but both want Roto resolve things with 1146 and see it as their duty to take him down. They don't believe 1146 about the whole conspiracy of a immortal Cancer ruling the world and doing all this other unbelievable stuff. Even when they see 3803 surviving a lot of damage, they chalk it up to her having access to some high tech she stole. Either way I'm conflicted on them being tragic villains who refuse to stop fighting 1146 and capture 3803 under orders or villains who get redeemed at the end.

But Akadama Killer T. Tell me more? What's he like?

Other stuff-

Macrophage is called Hacker. Both because she can hack her targets into pieces with her axe and because she's a famous computer hacker. She found 3803 and Platelet years ago after they had escaped from the underground lab. She was reasearching for fun what the base was and discovered its use for making immortality. She took the two girls in to raise as if they were her own and trained them how to survive as Akadama (more so 3803 since she's older). When Macrophage isn't a assassin for hire, she's using her hacking abilities as mission control for 3803 when she's on the job. She helps her not get too lost and handles money transactions. They see her as the mom they never had despite that she's really only around 14 years older then them.

Platelet loves blowing things up. She likes building things too. But bombing things helps her little family out more. She'll often plant tiny bombs all over the city and has Macrophage use her computer to keep track of them so she can detonate them when she sees a use to (like blowing up anyone chasing 383 while she's on her motorcycle). She adores 1146 and loves having him be part of her family. Partly because he's so strong and protective she doesn't have to worry as much about 3803 as much with him around. It's unknown just how much the experiments affected her too. All that's known is she's never been sick and barely needs any sleep to operate and always has nothing but energy to spare. She gets scared easily when 3803 might get taken away because her big sis has always been there for her and she's terrified of Cancer destroying her life and family again. If she lost 3803 she doesn't think she'd known how to live ob without her.

Cancer refers to all his experiments as his children. He calls 3803 and Platelet his daughters in particular and plans on having them back and fully like him so they can be his perfect family. He's actually known them since they were babies since, before they escaped, they've spent most, if not, all their lives in his care at the lab.

In this verse, 1146 is a much more aggressive pursurer of 3803's affections. He's still shy about making moves and acts stoic. But it's apparent he's interested in her early on and after awhile he makes no secret he wants to marry her. It always surprises her when he talks about wanting to marry her because he's too shy to flirt with her or even ask her on a date. He's both unable to make the first move, yet is very blunt about his desired intentions. She on the other hand is more hesitant. With her unknown immortality status, she's afraid she can't grow old with him and would deny him a normal wife. He simply says he wants her and no one else will ever do.

3803 feels bad about him becoming a criminal. He's fighting his friends and comrades and has a huge life sentence on him all because he protected he. He tells her even if he has never met her. He knows sooner or later he would have left on his own and been branded a Akadama. Meeting her just have him another reason to believe in protecting others. Plus she does let him live with her and her for free. She still tries to pay him for his services when he protects her on the job. Initially he takes the money. But after too long she finds out all he does with the money is buy her things she was planning on getting later anyway. He basically was doing her errands for her. She gave up after that.

1146 is very protective of 3803's secret and has killed people over it to protect her. Those people being top high level Executioners who are in on Cancer's existence and his plans. 1146 knows the moment Cancer can get 3803 and confirm her ID. There's going to be a lot of trouble. He's made it a goal to either turn those people to his side or kill them all until there's no one left. When Cancer hears of this, he calls him a kind killer.

Macrophage once jokes 1146 should be called Husband instead of Bodyguard because that's what he acts like with 3803. All overprotective and lovey dovey. He hates it when other men flirt with him and scared them off.

Cancer is actually more aware of 3803 and Platelets activity then anyone thinks. It's just that he's immortal so time is a little for him. He kind of enjoys watching them hide and run and wondering how far he can push 1146 in his efforts to protect them.

That's all I got I think. Putting in Cancer kind of changes things up but I also think he strangely fits in there very well.

Any other ideas you have?

~~~

Oh my! It’s been a while since you’ve made such a long and lovely submission! First things first, yes, Swindler is best girl!!!

Heheh, I found Cutthroat/Swindler to be somewhat cute, but I had a feeling things would turn out for the worst when the team ultimately separated after Doctor’s betrayal and the fight with the Executioners. It was a pretty cool dynamic and I love how Swindler ultimately turned the tables on him.

(I’m a bit leery as to why he could see her “red halo” from so far away, but I suppose it was due to insanity/supernatural influences).

And yup! There was going to be a director’s cut. A Youtuber actually translated the tweets that directors had regarding the director’s cut and discovered that it was going to be an extra seven minutes of footage and would feature scenes that would help flesh out the last episode more.

It’s super interesting.

LINK HERE

Ooohhhh, a season 2 where we can see best girl and Courier to come back??? To be honest, I like the series where it stands. It had a message, stuck with it, but managed to punch it all in with masterful animation techniques and storytelling. One of the characters that I think would definitely come back, should probably be Hacker. He was a god of cyberspace and savvy with technology.

Someone once speculated that he’s smart: he would definitely upload a backup of himself somewhere.

(Another person thought that Hacker must have saved himself on Swindler’s phone because his drone icon was there after his final parting gift).

I think the best way to add onto the series would be to revisit their backgrounds? Then again, I checked out the available manga chapters that have been translated thus far, and it seems they might delve a little into that territory.

Maybe a one shot episode where we get to see all the Akudama go about their daily lives where they sometimes interact (unknowingly) Durarara style (another great anime you should watch if you have the time).

Hacker as main character??? Yes please???

3803 would definitely do crazy tricks, hahah. She’s simultaneously skilled and unskilled with her bike. She’s like the... Captain Jack Sparrow of the series except instead of being drunk all the time, she’s somewhat clueless and innocent.

Bodyguard is such a lovely name. Like... I can picture it and it really fits. Not only does it satisfy his canon role of protecting, it actually helps him from actually killing too many people unnecessarily. He’ll do it if he has to, but his main goal is to protect his charge, not go after any assassins and whatnot.

Ooooohhhh, I love Cancer here! You make him out to be some terrible god of destruction and chaos and I absolutely adore it. And the motive for immortality makes more sense in this au then in the canon for AD, hahah. But yes, I imagine after years of destruction and infamy, he would definitely feel lonely and bitter.

So of course, why not drag the rest of humanity down with him?

3803 and Platelet both being somewhat immortal beings? Yes??? And Macrophage being one of their true confidants? Also yes??? (WHERE ARE YOU GETTING ALL THESE GOOD IDEAS???)

I know later on you’ll talk about Macrophage being a hacker (because of major hacking skills in tech and in killing), but what about this: she’s the Doctor from AD. Not a backstabber, but one who was somewhat affiliated with the idea of immortality. Maybe she was one of the scientists who helped raise 3803 and Platelet and after discovering that all the rest of the experiments died and only two remained, she decided enough was enough and got them out of Cancer’s hold.

Hmm... how about we combine Hacker and Doctor to create Scientist instead? She’s cold and ruthless underneath her ladylike vibes, but she truly does feel for the plight of 3893 and Platelet.

I don’t know, it would make for an interesting dynamic.

Oooohhh, I love the confrontation with WBC squad and 3803. They’re so geared and ready (4989 is definitely sweating bullets while the others reassure him). Also, you know how in AD canon that the Executions are always in pairs? Let’s have 2001 and 1145 the original pairing before he broke out. Then, 4989 with 2626 and 2048 and Eosinophil while 2001 gets stuck with Band Cell. Because, why not.

(Or, we go back to one of my most heinous friendships I ever created, 2001 and Dendritic Cell).

Can I also say that Bomber is such a bomb name for Platelet? (Pun completely intended).

And yeah, the WBC squad are definitely really uncomfortable when they undergo some cognitive dissonance here... perhaps it’s starting at this moment that they realize that Akudama aren’t that different from normal people... or the Executioners.

Bomb collars and surgery for 1146??? Ooohhhh, he must really be the top Executioner... I wonder if he’ll reunite with 2001 again as his partner or get someone new who can help control him. Because NK and Killer T are definitely partners.

On a side note you mentioned that they think that Executioners are a necessary evil. It’s like your acknowledging and somewhat hinting that they know this is wrong and that Akudamas aren’t inherently bad, but do so anyway because of a corrupt legal system. I love it. It really adds to the depth of the characters.

And yes, we need tragic villains with feelings.

As for Akudama Killer T... Maybe he went through some mental breakdown before realizing that the Executioners aren’t always right )if they were ever right in the first place). Perhaps he breaks like 1146 did, but instead of using his skills for constructive purposes, he goes all out and doesn’t care about the law anymore. He sort of becomes 1146’s foil. They’re both rear Executioners, both saw the errors of their ways, but while 1146 becomes a protector in his own way, maybe Killer T decides to become a mercenary.

I don’t know, I love parallels and showcasing how far characters have done.

(I REALLY WANTED PUPIL EXECUTIONER TO BECOME AN AKUDAMA OR AT LEAST HAVE A MOMENT TO HERSELF, BUT IT NEVER HAPPENED. AT LEAST THE DIRECTORS CUT IS SAID TO ADDRESS THAT).

Cancer as a father?

Cancer as a family man?

I... that’s a concept I never considered. Just, I can only imagine him playing with all of his experiments, knowing that one day, most of them will end up dying. He probably favors 3803 over Platelet because of how close they are in physical appearance/age and acts creepy about it.

(Is this my Abnormalities!verse writing urge acting up again, probably).

Hehehe, why but blunt 1146. That is so cute and adorable. He and 3803 constantly dance around the issue, especially due to the whole immortality thing, but he makes it clear that he doesn’t care. Though he doesn’t know it, he’s actually quite suave when he finally convinces her that it’s the time they spend together now that matters so they won’t regret in the future.

3803 swoons.

Husband??? Yes???

Macrophage as confirmed 3803/1146 shipper? Why not???

Ooohhh, Cancer is more aware than what was already expected... I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!!!

So I know that I said earlier that Macrophage would be a combination of Hacker and Doctor, why not also make Cancer have Hacker elements? Think about it, he’s practically immortal and it was never truly confirmed how immortality works in AD canon. Maybe his immortality is due to a combination of high technology and organic stuff. Maybe, he can upload his consciousness at will so that he can “supervise” his children. It also adds credence to the whole “3803 had high tech to help her stave off heavy damage” that Killer T and NK think is what’s going on. I don’t know, I just think it would be cool to have Cancer be a god in the physical and technological world.

He would be so OP, but that’s what Cancer probably would want in CAW canon, so there, hahah.

Hmm, anything else? Let’s see, Killer T as an Akudama would definitely be more of a Brawler character... I don’t have anybody down for Hoodlum... But who do you think would be a best fit for Head Executioner? At first, I wanted Helper T, but I realized that he doesn’t get super utilized in canon, so why not make him Executioners alongside Regulatory T. Seriously, they don’t get enough screen time (especially Regulatory T).

As for the majority of Akudamas, most are definitely pathogens or germs, but I’m assuming some of them are actually Normal Cells... Normal Cells with benign mutations, but somehow get the attention of Executioners.

But yeah, this was an awesome little au. I’m down to read some action packed nonsense with these characters. You should definitely try your hand at writing this, hahah!

#cells at work #hataraku saibou #devin trinidad #devin trinidad author #devintrinidad author #caw #devintrinidad #caw anon #anon ask #submission #akudama drive #akudama

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