#idk if i'll get it back or not - i think they should use it to fix up the walls - but im not really bothered about it i guess
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Mysterion in Chaos Plan
Upon request I'm gonna translate my elaborations on this post on Mysterion's design in my fic :> I wish I could actually present you guys with a drawn design but i haven't had time to draw lately plus all my attempts to draw him until now haven't been satisfactory to me, but I still wanna rant about my choices.
[Anyways, first things first, IF anyone ever is tempted to draw any fanart (giggles and kicks feet uncontrollably) I want y'all to know there's no pressure to stay true to these ideas. The descriptions & details for Mysterion's getup in my fic are purely practical, because design is a visual element that isn't considered in questions of practicality and realism. If you have any ideas you like better for his design, or if you feel like any of this is hindering your creative freedom, by all means throw this in the trash and do what you want instead. I love seeing people's individual creative interpretations and I don't wanna hinder anyone's creativity.]
Anyways, with that out of the way, let's get to it.
(from chapter 2 of Chaos Plan)
I'm a SUCKER for Miles Morales' silhouette as Spiderman in the first movie, and because both Mysterion and Spiderman are both vigilante/heroes with working class roots I love to find similarities between the two of them. So I'll be referring to Miles a few times in this post >:)
I like the idea of Kenny using really old maybe counterfeit brand basketball shorts that he used to wear to sleep or something. I'm not yet settled on the specific patterns/lines that I want them to be adorned with, so just for reference you can imagine something like this:
As for colors; I like the idea that these shorts might be the brightest part of his outfit as a reference to Kenny's dumbass "underwear over pants" design in canon.
His canon design is also the main reason I don't wanna give him just normal long pants, and instead stick with the Miles-Morales-type shorts-over-thermal leggins idea.
I like to think that Kenny got thermal ski underwear (pants and undershirt) from Kyle or Stan at some point for when they went camping (bc ain't no way Kenny would go skiing), and he just forgot to return it aka they forgot to ask for it back, so that's what he uses underneath his hoodie & shorts to keep warm.
For colors, I like the idea that they're a dark color to contrast the light-colored shorts but have lines similar to these in a neon green color. Just to add a fun something
And well, then there's his hoodie. Just a regular ol' hoodie, a dark one of course to blend in better into the night (dramatic ass bitch), dark purple like Mysterion's cape in canon except he has no cape because. well. realistically, impractical. But yeah, I imagine it to look a little makeshift, which is why I have Kenny spray-paint the question mark in the front (and an unmentioned "M" on the back of his hoodie) to give it that tacky look. Again, like Miles does his Spiderman costume in the first movie.
(screenshot from chapter 6 of Chaos Plan)
As for his pouch/fanny pack; I was very inspired by the type of clothes people who do parkour wear, and that shit has to be very light for maximum mobility. A utility belt wouldn't be the best choice for hip mobility, so a fanny pack he can slap across his chest and back would be the way to go. It just needs to be big enough to store some fireworks, a gun (the one he stole from Harris lmao), cigarettes and other miscellaneous things like a lighter, lock picks, his small knife, maybe a chapstick idk he definitely should
Something like this but, again, creative freedom is welcome.
And well, then there's Kenny's gloves (crucial!! bc it's cold as balls plus he CANNOT LEAVE FINGERPRINTS ANYWHERE!!), his mask, and a bandana to hold back his hair. Here's a really old shitty sketch I did once gashagdha (yes he has long hair that he has to tie together. I haven't mentioned this in the fic because i'm an idiot)
And well, for warmth & anonymity reasons I often describe him wearing a thermal tube scarf, kinda something like what I often see in Princess Kenny fanart to cover his mouth. But I haven't yet found a way to make this look cool in combination with the mask so maybe this will only stay in written word...
As for his shoes, I'm not really attached to any specific type but I do find it significant that they look like they're being held together by hopes and prayers. Tongue, collar and lining sticking out upward as the shoelaces wrap tight around the ankle to ensure it doesn't slip. Maybe duck-taped together at the tip or something. Listen, it's hard to buy new shoes when you don't want any purchases to get traced back to your identity, okay. He's forced to raw-dog this shit and we respect that.
Anyways that's it!! someday i'm going to edit this monster fic and all these details will be much clearer from the text alone, but for now we're running on the first version of the story so bear with me. I might do a similar post for Chaos too if I don't manage to draw him first :)
#mysterion#chaos plan#sp fanfic#sp fanfiction#south park fanfiction#kenny mccormick#sp kenny#my fic#lucio yaps
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//lots of end-of-the-year shouting in this post, sorry if it gets too loud, I'm screaming into a read-more pillow... mostly.
there would be no Zach, Eric, and Ria (and Ver lol) without ByeNYC so:
thanks @byenycfm , its lovely admins, and every single member of the group, I obv won't tag all of you on an indie blog but I LOVE YOU. you're all amazing and amazingly talented, I love your characters. I'm grateful for Ria and her beautiful skeleton bio, thanks for letting me take care of this bby. thank you for *the* brotp I'll never get over, thanks for two heartbreaking ships and three heartwarming ones, for all the crazy headcanons we've got there, whether it's chasing zombies with an RC car or pushing one out of the window or down the stairs... most importantly - thank you for promising you'd come back after the group's hiatus and for actually coming back. we've created a community we wanna return to and we all deserve the biggest hug for that. 💙
thanks for coming back @renegadetulisrp , Old Ass RPers know what's up lol. we've known each other for more than a decade, holy shit. I love you and your babies - don't ever change, add more muses, write more crazy plots, you're one of my favorite reasons I'll always log back here 💙
@pleinsdemuses my bb! I love you and our 1000 verses where we hurt our babies for the plot and hand them some Happy Verse cookies so they don't kill us. my angst, smut, drama partner in crime, I don't think we'll ever run out of ideas. thank you for everything 💙
I don't know if I love us or hate us, @parvumchao , probably a bit of both lmao. it sounds like a threat, but I'll follow you everywhere, the dash without you is shitty. I love your muses - we don't have a single happy thread *shrugs*, but I really do 💙
@nikkiitalks , let's ruin our muses and cry over them like we're not responsible for their misery! thank you for finding me years ago and for keeping me. or for letting me keep you. I don't know, we're just holding hands and follow each other everywhere and that's how it should be 💙
another partner in chomper crime! I'm so happy you and your ocs joined BNYC, @myriadxofxmuses , so now our lovely nerd ship can sail in two verses, giving us diabetes! it wouldn't be the same without you, my dash here wouldn't be the same without you, I'm so happy I've met you! 💙
@ayakoito first-time husbands muns, I'm so happy for these two! we can have 100 threads and they find a new way to make me AWWW in every single one. we can ramble about everything and anything and I'm so happy to have you, but I'm sure you will understand when I say thank you for teaching me the most important word ever: verschlimmbesserung. 😂💙
thinking "oh god, so much cringe" already? it gets worse. more hugs and thank yous:
@plotsjotsandespressoshot and your girls - I apologize for being a shit partner and I miss writing with you, so we need a new thread or ten now lol 💙
@kierankyleculkin you hurt a bot but I think you're lovely 💙
@impcrsonatcr my fellow h.alsey human, big hugs! 💙
@thefvrious & @ghostsxagain and your chef's kiss muses - I'm a fan 💙
@dontcxckitup , @richardxoliverxmayhew , @kit-just-kit - I don't think you'll mind if I put your trio like this? that's how I see you, guys lol. your muses are among my all-time favorites. 💙
speaking of favorites - @notsoinnocentlittleangel I want you to know that Joanna is one of my favorite female ocs ever 💙
@brokenblondeprincess and pierogi is a full sentence 💙
@rcbf4 it's "Adam", not "Jake" 😂💙
@sugarandwhiskey and your lovely bby - thanks for popping on my dash 💙
@emeryfleming @corxunum @ghostsandmirrors @formaechao @heartxshaped-bruises @crew-from-capulet @bewitchingbaker @poisonedfire @brooklynislandgirl @thatslayer @facepeeled @alwaysanangcl - seeing you on the dash makes me happy 💙
people I've followed since my indie debut, @cheapxseats @heartonanoose - idk if you're still around, we haven't had a thread together in ages but thank you for the ones we had in the past 💙
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hi. i run a decently popular ososan blog (well, it's a bit dead nowadays, but still), and i've been pretty vocally anti-blmatsu for its entire run. i've been diligent in keeping every post free of any of it, and that's not going to change anytime soon, for the sake of that blog's remaining follower base who rely on it being a safe space away from the proshipping, but...
well... i just made a blmatsu sideblog. and i've been feeling a lot of conflicting feelings about it and about my personal sense of morality considering my previously strong stance against it.
something simultaneously really funny and really sad to me is that i actually still don't ship or support incest shipping in any other fandom. (i've never supported harassment over any kind of shipping though. so idk if i count as an anti or more of a neutral party with a strong opinion? well i guess none of that matters now bc here i am, shipping blmatsu lmfao)
i still find incest to be morally wrong, but my hypocrite ass just... eats blmatsu up for breakfast lunch and dinner. i'm tired of fronting like i don't. how do i reconcile these conflicting beliefs? how can i be an anti and ship it at the same time? GOOD QUESTION, UHHH, LEMME GET BACK TO YOU ON THAT ONE IN LIKE... NEVER YEARS
i'm gonna put my inner conflict in a bottle and try really hard not to think about it <3
i've wrestled with myself about this for a while actually— i used to have another blmatsu blog, way back in the peak of the fandom, that i deleted out of guilt shortly before making my current main and taking my opposed stance to it. part of me still feels like an awful person for "sliding backwards" and taking part in something i previously thought i was "over".
i really don't even have a good defense for it, if im honest, so i won't even try. i've heard every argument against it because i used to make them. in the end, it just feels right to me that the only ones desperate enough to get with these losers are... these losers.
i could never ever endorse irl incest because i'm a victim of it, and i feel like that alone should have ensured i would never touch blmatsu!! it adds heaps to my guilt about all this, because i feel like in a way i could be failing my fellow victims... but seeing blmatsu art makes me just as happy as seeing platonic art of them does. i just keep coming back to it no matter how hard i try to repress it. it's practically unavoidable around here anyways, sooo...
sooo. i'm done repressing! if that makes me a bad person, then i'll see you in hell. oh yeah, and if you like karamatsu ships you should come follow me at todokaras on tumblr <3 (no, i'm not THAT todokaras, i just stole their name)
TL;DR: I run a blmatsu blog and an anti-blmatsu blog at the same time and i feel pretty guilty about it. oh the thrill of a double life
Congrats! It’s actually pretty common for antis to secretly like « problematic » things, because puritanism inherently goes against normal human behavior such as kinks and catharsis. It’s sad that we have to hide to avoid abuse and harassment, but that’s how it is for now.
Anyway, going against the shame a cult has pushed into you must be hard, but it’s great that you’re taking that first step to understand and express yourself free of shame!
I also feel honored that you came to my page to confess this ^^
#osomatsu san#blmatsu#tw inc*st#tw: incest#proship#proshipper safe#tw antiship#tw: anti#anti anti#recovering anti
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Okay, I'd initially decided not to respond to this chain any further because it didn't seem like we were going to get anywhere other than stressing us both out, but in the interest of... idk, respecting the fact that I appreciate you stopping to explain what this has looked like from your end and clarifying some things, I guess? I do want to actually respond.
Which - thank you for doing that, genuinely, because I think we've been talking past each other for a lot of this conversation, and I apologize for my part in that. I have clearly misunderstood some things you've been saying. (For instance: at no point did I get the message that you thought I'd misunderstood something, and to be honest even reading back I can't parse that out of anything said prior to this response.)
I will be honest in saying that I do think that disagreeing on whether people are allowed to exist or not is not "just having a different opinion." I did not start thinking you were interacting in bad faith until the last couple of messages (where if I'm completely honest, I started getting the same "being dense on purpose" impression you've clearly been getting from me in turn), however expressing disbelief in the legitimacy of someone's experience is not really something you can just agree to disagree on. (Bad faith is different from malice.) I do appreciate that you weren't trying to be rude, but the fact remains that coming onto someone's post defending endogenic systems calling me "genuinely insane" and "probably why people say leftists are sensitive" for doing so is rude by I think anyone's measure. That's not a very neutral or respectful way to express an opinion, and it came off to me as starting an argument on purpose, which is why I responded the way I did.
My second response, to your initial "I don't want to discuss this right now" reblog, was not me getting upset about it again - it was me trying to explain why I'd gotten frustrated, while acknowledging that forgetting to respond to stuff happens and that explained why it had looked like you'd ignored me the first time.
The context that you lost the headspace for having the discussion after the initial comment explains why you suddenly reversed course after you started the conversation initially, and that's much more understandable now that I know that - if I'd known that to start with I wouldn't have been so annoyed. Without that context, from my perspective, the exchange basically looked like:
A: here's my opinion defending an often-bullied group's right to exist. B: hey this is a stupid opinion you have and I disagree. A: why do you think it's stupid and disagree? I'd like to talk about it. B: I don't want to talk about it actually.
Does it make sense why that felt frustrating and like shit-starting for no reason to me? (I don't want to keep overexplaining myself, just - this conversation looked very different without that piece of context you just provided, which is why I've been reacting the way I have.)
I'll be honest, I completely misunderstood what you were apologizing for. It sounded to me like you were apologizing for either not realizing I was the same person (???), or more likely apologizing for doing this twice on my posts/reblogs, without acknowledging the thing I was actually annoyed about, which was the perceived A-B interaction I just described above. This was a misread on my part, and I probably should have asked for clarification; that seemed clear enough to me that it didn't even occur to me that I might have misunderstood. (To the point where to be honest, even rereading it now knowing that's an incorrect interpretation, it still reads that way to my brain.) I apologize for that; that one's on me.
Given that understanding that the apology was actually meant to be for the thing I was annoyed about and not the mostly-unrelated things it seemed to be about, I appreciate the apology, and I think we can probably let this conversation rest there, unless some part of my explanation for why I've responded the way I have to all this needs more clarification?
Genuine question, does our system need to label ourselves as ‘endo-neutral’? (Mostly because we just really, really cannot bring ourselves to care. Also people are people and we can’t care (low empathy))
I ask asking because I (and the system) are not involved in syscourse, and I’m not sure what to put in the tags to prevent people from being upset.
Ignore this ask if it is rude in any way (genuinely)
(This was written by the co-host)
If you want my opinion, if you want to say “we don’t want to be actively involved in syscourse,” that exact sentence is the only way to say it.
Personally, I’m kind of of the opinion that “endo-neutral” isn’t a real thing unless you’re “neutral” in the sense that you haven’t done enough research on it yet to have formed an opinion (which, that’s valid but a different thing than true neutrality). You can’t really be neutral on whether people are allowed to exist or not. Either you’re okay with people fakeclaiming other people, or you’re not. “Endo-neutral” just tells me you are okay with it, you’re just not actively doing it yourself - which is a little like this comic:
Y’feel?
This is not me saying you have to involve yourself actively in syscourse. As a matter of fact, I recommend you don’t actively seek that out, in most cases - it’s not really good for you, generally speaking. Not wanting people to drop syscourse on your doorstep is perfectly reasonable. But unfortunately, if you interact with other systems much, it’s probably going to come up eventually, whether you like it or not. Eventually you are going to be in a space where someone starts talking about how endogenic systems aren’t real, and you’re going to have to decide how to respond to that and whether you’re willing to tolerate it.
Ultimately, I don’t think you have to be emotionally invested to decide whether you think something is right or wrong. I know there’s probably some extra energy investment required for that for you, but unfortunately I think that’s just something you’re going to have to deal with, as harsh as that might sound. I don’t really see a way around it. Which, it’s as good a time as any to ask yourself - where do your morals lie? What basic principles do you build your morality on? Are they internally consistent, and if not, what needs to change to make it so? And if you follow those principles to their natural conclusion, what does that tell you about the situation you’ve been given?
(Also, entirely pragmatically, if your goal is to avoid people getting mad at you, “endo-neutral” in my experience kind of just gets both sides upset anyway - endo supporters because of everything I just said, anti-endos because anyone who tolerates endos is the enemy according to them. You’re probably better off just stating you don’t want to argue about syscourse to achieve that goal.)
But that’s just my two cents’ worth. Hopefully it’s good food for thought at least.
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a pet headcanon of mine is that after they're done with the sigil removal, emira expands her horizons and starts studying the psychological side of healing, pulling in some resources from the human realm and combining it with boiling isles methods (i imagine the field of psychology in the boiling isles, while existent, was often pushed aside as just a lesser branch of the healing coven back when belos was in charge. i do imagine there's often magic like the memory tweezers involved)
and i imagine she ends up focusing in on like, art therapy and self-expression, because she knows how important that can be, after having her individuality stifled so hard when she was young
#eliot posts#toh#the owl house#emira blight#canon gave us so little on her compared to her siblings and i feel A Need to expand on her because of that lol#also i like the idea that she does still enjoy illusion magic and focuses more on the artistic/creative side of it#she also gets into non-magical art at some point#<idk if that hc came from me or f1ddlyb1ts or if we both came up w it independently but it's included in one of their fics#and then i think she explores writing some and even a bit of music and bard magic#projecting my ''cannot stick to just one creative hobby'' here#raine mentors her because if amity can get lilith and edric can get eda then emira should get raine#also all of the blight kids have formed a good relationship with darius as their probably future stepdad#but emira especially vibes with him#like ''hey dad i'm going for manicures and bubble tea with your boyfriend. i'll be back by seven''#boiling isles bubble tea has eyeballs instead of tapioca‚ naturally
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Looks like I might be getting an Xbox pretty soon. And maybe, 6 months game pass. I didn't want a game pass, planned just buying games I needed (one game, you know which one), but one local shop has some really nice offer with it included. Maybe it's a good idea - to try something else as well, and then buy it if I really like it.
(oh my, didn't plan it before the winter break... I don't have much time for gaming right now... ).
#truly I was doubting whether I needed it at all#like maybe I should just go back to Skyrim on my potato of a PC and forget it all#like a weird dream (that was the best dream until it turned to nightmare)#all this DLC mess left me kinda burnt out#truth is I think souls mechanics by itself could be good for improving my current pitiful mental state#like getting some real challenge not just lazy drunken TES strolls#and maybe getting inspired enough to go on with my AU#alma.txt#not getting PS bc it's more expensive#Also mom won't let me use the TV much so I'll be connecting to my desktop (IDK if PS connets to desktop but Xbox synchronizes well)
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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.
#well I just submitted my essay for my history class so I'm finally done with finals#I wish I felt happier or relieved or something but I don't. I feel awful. my body hurts from the incredible amount of tension/anxiety I had#trying to finish it before 11:59. I submitted it at 11:55. I have never come that close before and I hate it#the amount of anxiety I had you'd think the deadline was hunting me for sport#and what's worse is I felt all this anxiety and put all this work into it and I'm not even happy about it#I spent two days trying to figure out what he wanted us to write about because apparently he just seems to be really bad at instructions#like I thought maybe it was just me overthinking but I spent two hours talking to my mom about it and in the end even she couldn't figure i#so then I had only two days to gather notes make an outline write an essay. while burnt out and barely able to focus.#and while not knowing exactly what I was doing like is this what he wants. is it not. who knows I literally don't have time left#to figure it out I just need to write something and hope it works#but I hate being unsure it makes everything harder#especially because I really wanted to make a good grade. this was the class where I made a 78 on my midterm#which brought my class grade to a B but I'd been able to get it back to an A and I'd be able to keep it if I got like an 80ish on the final#the essay turned out okay idk if it's what he wanted but whatever at least I got the other requirements like word count and sources#but the CITATIONS...we had to use chicago which I'd never used before and let me just say. mla is the love of my life after this.#actually chicago might not be that bad if I got used to it I think my violence should be directed toward every word processor#that links footnotes. it is so STUPID that there isn't an easier way to make them different#if it hadn't been for trying to figure out footnotes on google docs I could've submitted it like ten minutes earlier#and with phenomenally less stress#I eventually had to make a choice as to what I'd give up: (1) submitting it on time (2) perfect citations or (3) word doc#which is what he wanted it submitted as#except when I tried that thank goodness I looked at the preview before I submitted it because I saw that it'd messed up the citations#I ended up submitting it as a pdf. on time. with perfect (maybe) (I didn't have time to double check) citations. but not as a word doc.#is it the end of the world? idk probably not but not meeting a professor's requirements is like. anathema.#all of that is to say that I'm going to cry and then let it go and get to bed and just. idk. I've reached that point where#I'm so tired and numb that it feels like I'll never feel better#anyway#maybe I hurt because of my meds and the side effects decided to kick in now because the grace of God held them back long enough#for me to finish#earl crow ramblings
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just recently watched this is us with my college friends
#tbqh i found it kinda boring 😭#the louis clips were so not enough#ive watched some clips online prior to actually watching it (for the first time might i add)#one of my friends had a cousin who was crazyyy ab 1d so she dragged her out to the cinema to go watch it when it came out and in 3d lol 😭#the 3d schtick is so funny 2 me lmao 😭#my friend recalls freaking out in the movie theater bc she was a major niall fan at the time. she said 3d niall was so close 2 her face lol#anyway. ab how i watched some clips online prior#i was actually waiting for the louis n his sisters part or the one where he visits his school or smth#my friends.... they literally don't know a thing ab louis personality-wise so they didn't really get much from it#UGH i should download aotv and make them watch it that was way more interesting (but idk? smth about it feels like it's made for fans only?#but... i'll suggest it the next time we get together 🙏🏼#anyw back to my review.#simon cowell's face was a jumpscare what can i say. it was so evil how nicole scherzinger was just. completely written off#im from the future i Know things#<- and like. about this. i felt kinda bad being cynical about the movie when i know my friend is Still an ot5 at heart#i think i broke her 13-year old heart a little 😭#it's so weird how the movie keeps singling out zayn about him getting kicked out or him talking solo music etc kskdj. feels v pointed Lol#they really just documented the 1d-mania & madness they ensued huh.... i think 2 of my friends (bts fans) weren't as impressed LOL 😭#they kinda flamed their performances and stage outfits which is. yeah i agree. kpop idols do WAY more than just.... that (1d) kskskd#i guess i'll make them watch the extra clips next time (o haven't seen all the clips yet i think)#OH and 😭 why was martin scorsese in the film that was hilarious#didn't have a lot of realness to it. is what i thought of the film. yeah. this is(N'T) us ✊🏽😔#maybe... i am too much of a hater#i liked... the... um. it's hard to highlight things i liked ab the film when im Not a 1d fan 😭 like im a louie ONLY idgaf ab 1d 😔#the part ab louis audition.... im sorry babie the editors did u dirty but it was so funny........😭#<- though i imagine it solidified people's (wrong) opinions about him :/
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Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake finale spoilers without context
#all im gonna say is that if you know you know! lol#iykyk; not sure if I should tag this as spoilers or if this is incomprehensible enough to not need one 😂#you're welcome to take guesses on whats going on with adventure time fionna & cake if you want lol to avoid spoiling anyone though I'll#neither confirm nor deny your guesses lol#some of these are very specific references so I think i'll just post it lol#by the way; I'm counting episodes 9 and 10 as the finale since they dropped in pairs of 2!#all of this is seen in those two episodes though; in one way or another; you'll see if you haven't yet! plz go watch it on HBO Max!#boosted numbers & stuff could get us more adventure time spinoff series or even a F&C season 2 (though I don't think one is needed tbh)#I wouldn't be upset though if they somehow came up with more material to cover for a season 2; there are little loose ends left over#but I'm not sure it's really enough content for an entire 2nd season unless we're going to lava world; apocalypse world; tiny world; etc.#the lich could also come back for however many times he has if it's a different instance of him from across the multiverse; but idk#tried to get a little bit of everything in this post without giving it all away; hope I did okay in that regard!#if you can tell me the collegehumor reference without looking it up; you get a cookie! 🍪💜#mine#op#adventure time#fionna and cake#atimers#casper & nova#cheers
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Sometimes i feel useless and annoying
#//vent#my vent art is... normal sometimes like this one so okay to rb but idk might delete later or removing the tags#i use a lot the wilsons as confort ch actually#idk sometime i feel like i'm not that appreciated in the fandom idk despite my heart know it's wrong#i think it just bc i overthink about some tawog artists that i enjoyed giving support for months but they never interacted with me#and for one of them their art and cute doodles helped me in personal stuff + brought me back to tawog fandom#and i hoped to make them smile with my art but.. yeah they just... don't care after these months#I get sad and disappointed that now they art send just... /neg vibes so i unfollowed them#idk i just feel guit that i made them upset for... unknown reasons#sigh i should just don't care about that and keep to draw dor myself#cringy or not#i'm mostly an optimistic person but overthink a lot when i feel anxious haha#i'll be probably smile and enjoy life again tomorrow#if ppl wanna talk or sending cute ask ye you can#talking with ppl help me to confort so feel free
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ugh there it goes
#our promotion 😢😢#1st place is gone#today was tough our opponents were all way better than us#we only won 1 match out of 6#now they're leading our league well we should at least win our last matchday and get 2nd place#the no1 seed was in another league from ours 6:0 6:0 altough she's quite a good player at our club#we only won one doubles match altough they were not as good by far as their other players#and all the matches were quite one sided they were also way higher rated than us#i also lost my match 😫 altough it was quite close actually but that is even worse sometimes idk#i certainly could have won idk why i didn't i mean there were not many chances but they were there#i lost 5:7 4:6 ugh 😭#maybe with a better serve i would have won#but i was 5:4 up and i didn't win that point like that's when you have to be there and make it#i think this might just be one of my weaknesses i'm really good at conebacks and believing in that i'll win but i have to be more effective#and 'cold' when it matters sometimes i'm quite wasteful with my chances#i often make the craziest most difficult shots which are 'impossible' to get back but then fail at the easiest one's#especially in the crucial moments maybe i should play it safe more and be more patient#nah but winning that first set would have changed everything because 3rd sets are more likely to be my advantage with my speed and fitness#and in the 2nd i was just always one behind i always caught up but never went ahead#my serve also wasn't really there today and my 2nd serve is still too weak opponents take advantage and if i have a bad 1st serve percentage#like today it makes it difficult to win my own serve and i also made many double faults (4) 😕#i aced her once tho 🤪#but my serves are sometimes great but very inconsistent dependent on the day (the 2nd one always bad)#my backhand also wasn't as good as usualy i hit a lot of them out but it got better altough then i took many with my forehand which worked#and my opponent had riddiculous stops they wouldn't go up the ground again 🫠#and she was so good at net and also whenever i went there she'd pass me or lob me 😅#i gave up doing that very soon my best shot at this was just hitting winners and hitting balls deep to her forehand#i succeeded at that a couple of times but it was not enough#i mean i didn't play badly but what a shame#she was very nice though and very fair it was a pleasant match and she told me she was the best opponent she encountered in the league
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having to make myself just pull back a second and go for "simplest explanation that fits all the facts and isn't accidentally inferring beyond the facts we do have".
#I tend to not want to eliminate possibilities so long as there's even a small chance of them happening and I get why#but at the same time I've ended up doubting things that I think in retrospect I should have taken at face value.#so being sus of ltx beyond the point at which it was clear she wasn't some secret mastermind and wondering if chen bin was even possessed.#and I've ended up making assumptions without realising we're not actually shown it (re: presuming photo possession allowed control)#I think it's mainly just frustrating because in retrospect I can see the clues all lining up. it's not that it wasn't fair play.#the pieces were all there.#link click#link click spoilers#(for the tags :V)#And I'll be honest. Usually I just keep theorising to myself unless I'm super certain or enough other people think similarly#because sometimes I'm on point and can't explain why and other times I trust hunches and don't realise that's what I'm doing so get confuse#when suddenly a piece of media seems to 'contradict' itself. when it's actually just contradicting what I thought I'd inferred#just. taking a step back and trying to apply the simplest explanation that fits. applying common sense as to what fits within genre etc.#I feel really weird about meta-gaming theorising using stuff like current pacing etc but at the same time it's still data that's available#and as long as it's not stuff like idk an interview giving it all away I don't think it's necessarily 'cheating'?#(may delete later idk)
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drowley is so good because i read a fic years ago and instantly fell in love and proceeded to imagine them getting together and getting married in my imagination/daydreaming and proceeded to have them as my favorite ship for years.
#drowley#idk whst it is man but drowley...... it proceedes to have a hold on me even though i eant to get rid of it sometimes#Like NO it wouldnt realistically be rhe best ship because of all the baggage#the fics i read i should not have been reading at yhe age i was#and overall its not yhr superior ship from an objective pov.#But. i cant get rid of it.#i cant stop thinking about deans favorite thing being crowley slowly running his fingers up and down his back.#i camt get over dean loving to be laid on top of because it grounds him and crowley likes to use him as a pillow#i cant gr over late night dates to crappy bars or to the famciest restaurant to ever exist#i had years of thoughts on them to the point the thoughts will never go away and I'll always have the headcanons and ill always be stuvk#shipping them. Like other people this is destiel#right? and dont get me wrong. i also LOVE destiel but like.... the way others sre eith destiel is how i am with drowley#because i spent gears imagining them together and literally cried shile imagining them getting married YOU WILL NEVER UNDESTAMF THE EXTENT
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my (virtual) meeting with my thesis advisor is in... 7 hours. I'm sort of almost finished writing the exposé that I was supposed to write. sort of. I'll probably need another hour or two until I feel okay enough about it to actually get any sleep.
unfortunately my left arm is realllly starting to hurt and I can't lift it much anymore (thanks to the covid booster I got today). hopefully I'll get it done anyway. and hopefully the pain won't be so bad that I can't sleep.
#I mean. if I get... idk like 3-4 hours of sleep that should be enough#I only have to be awake until the meeting is over. then I'll probably go back to bed.#and that way if it goes really really badly I can escape from that by being asleep lol#I hope it'll be okay 😭 I'm so scared#but it's this... much more quiet subtle kind of scared. I never experienced that before the anxiety meds#so it feels weird.#I haven't even cried yet! no panic attacks or anything! there have been a few meltdowns but not specifically about this#so I have to keep reminding myself that this is fine! I can handle this! it used to be sooooo much worse and I somehow got through that too#so I will definitely get through this and it will be okay#after all - no matter what happens. I'll be done with uni in February. I won't have to speak to my advisor ever again (so if he thinks I'm a#fucking idiot it doesn't matter at all!)#this is far from the hardest thing I've done! I was my dad's carer. I got my driver's license (yes that was very hard for me). I was in#therapy. I lived in abusive households until I was 25! this is easy in comparison#it just feels hard because I can't stand the feeling of being judged. and this is. just. me being judged (for what I write)#but it will be okay and I'll never write anything like this ever again and I'll get a break and I'll find a job I don't hate and it'll all#be worth it#personal#posts about my thesis
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@ihatethewest is a radfem who has a huge terf following and often interacts with other radfem blogs (if you search "feminism" on their blog, it's all from radfems)
Anon I think if you go tell them about it directly, it might resolve your issue??
inb4 the rest: I haven't contacted her before posting this reply;; anon i did take your suggestion to search her blog under 'feminism' and originally did see some questionable posts. but as I'm typing this response, I refreshed the search and it appears that she's actively removing rbs from radfems, maybe she got shinigami eyes a little late in the game, who knows. so... anon. did I do anything wrong? I don't think I've reblogged posts with terf radfem content but please let me know if I did thanks 👍
this is not an invitation for any radfems/terfs thinking my blog is friendly to you lot. you will be welcome here once you dismantle the hateful ideology from your mind and are no longer a radfem including you 'cryptos'
#asks#anon#the girls are fighting.txt#I mean if I've rb'd any specific posts that have harmful rhetoric pls let me know. I'll delete it#because yeah. I don't support any transphobia or misandry#while tumblr does seem to want to suggest 'blogs like this one' that have those components of radfem off of @ihatethewest's blog.#i don't see posts of that flavor on their blog? maybe she was radfem back in the day but i'd say it looks like she's not anymore#idk maybe that's where a lot of people start & then realize there are many parts of it that are bad!! u can talk to them directly about it?#I don't want to judge people purely by their past as if their current actions/change don't count.#i don't want to subscribe to 'once an x always an x' especially when it comes to ideology. which is something that CAN change#this is also like the 2nd blog that someone's told me is a radfem but also happens to be black ???#the other one was legit BAD w/ terf shit tho. like that was deserving of calling out. also the person who told me wasnt anon#<- im NOT saying that being black is an excuse/shield for terfism NOR am i saying that black feminism->radfem.#but is it a coincidence?? it is misogynoir on the part of anon???? whats going on folks. what. is. happening.#idk im tired. hey anon! you wanna tell me about other blogs that are for black liberation and aren't 'work with the establishment' liberal?#like im trying to get clued in to aligned struggles. clearly i have a void to fill wrt listening to black folk & im trying to remedy that#thru youtube and tumblr. purity policing is making it... annoying. also people's thoughts can change over time hello#exhibit A right here. I used to be a liberal & thought NPR was the bomb.com lmfao. u think people should start out perfect or be beheaded??#chen yells at clouds. more at 10
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