#idk if i'd rec it but i also wouldn't........ not rec it? it was just. an odd read. idk i'll prob read the next volume when it drops

[reinedeslys-central]

when it's been so long since you've read a fic that you forget about it and you find it in the search tags and start reading it again

and it's great, if a little familiar, but you've read a lot of these sorts of fics bc you like this tag a lot, so you assume it's nothing

but then the deja vu starts adding up and you start to wonder

and then moments before the great big Plot Twist Reveal happens you're suddenly like ah hell this is the bloody sundial fic again isn't it

smh this has to be the fourth time yet

[chadsuke]

Comics Read in 2024:

Dragon Age: The Silent Grove by David Gaider, Alexander Freed, & Chad Hardin (2012)

Dragon Age: Those Who Speak by David Gaider, Alexander Freed, & Chad Hardin (2012)

Dragon Age: Until We Sleep by David Gaider, Alexander Freed, & Chad Hardin (2013)

The Great Snake's Bride Vol. 1 by Fushiashikumo (2023)

The Great Snake's Bride Vol. 2 by Fushiashikumo (2023)

The Great Snake's Bride Vol. 3 by Fushiashikumo (2024)

The Great Snake's Bride Vol. 4 by Fushiashikumo (2024)

My Stepmother & Stepsisters Aren't Wicked Vol. 2 by Otsuji (2023)

My Stepmother & Stepsisters Aren't Wicked Vol. 3 by Otsuji (2024)

[ID: Covers of the aforementioned books. End ID.]

[cuephrase]

Are there any individual issues/short sections of the Tom Taylor Nightwing run you'd say are still worth checking out as little standalone/self contained things? I've read and enjoyed the 2021 annual (blood brothers) after seeing enough about it on tumblr but don't know much about the rest, and you've mention individual issues in other rec posts so it got me curious (and it's completely fine if you don't think you can recommend any).

asking me to be nice about TT?! *sighs* turns out i can be, actually, but um. only a little.

i'll preface all of this by saying, if you're interested in reading his run, you should. other people disliking a run is like...idk if this is going to make sense, but it's kind of like knowing the weather. you'll be like "hey, there's rain" and then you can either a) choose not to go outside, b) grab a coat and umbrella, or c) pull on a swimsuit and go dance. no wrong choices! maybe you get outside and it's more of alight drizzle, or maybe it's basically a tropical storm and you book it back inside and start batting down the hatches.

i could present you with people who's overall taste in comics i agree with who hate and love this run- actually, i was super hyped to read this run bc most of the people i'd talked to were like "OMG ITS SOOOO GOOD!!" and i was like "OKAY!!!" and then i was like 😗👉👈 maybe idk what good comics are?? (baby comic-reading cue felt wayyyy to new to the genre to trust their own opinions lmao. we're mostly past that now.)

but okay!! to answer your question: so post issue #91 is where my overall enjoyment of the run went like *imitates plane falling and crashing noises*. which. upon skimming from 78 to 91, i don't think i can say i was loving it that whole time, more like my tolerance threshold maxed out around there. bc uh. skimming i was like...yikes. i've also read way more Nightwing comics since, so like that could be factor.

ANYWAYS. me being nice:

#80 has some decent dick and tim!

#89 opens with a nice batman/superman/nightwing story, honestly can't remember if i liked the two-issue mini, but i'm going to guess i didn't bc even though i just looked i recall ✨nothing✨

#90-91 is a fun dick and wally adventure, if i remember correctly???? wally stans don't shoot me, i haven't read a whole lot of him idk if he's written well here i'm sorry

#111-112 is decent. it's not like. groundbreaking. but yk. maybe i just liked it more than the stupid pirate arc and maybe my standards are low and Good Dad Bruce is a weak spot, IDK

ummmm past that?

i like this page from #79

this panel is from #83 if you want to like see it with your own eyes on page.

the Hug is in issue #100, which is a bigger to celebrate 100 issues, and it happens later, i think it's the third story? some people love that scene, others can't stand it, i am a whore for soft batfam moments so it's very precious to me, and also nice moments make bad ones hurt more what?

if you like dickbabs you might enjoy more issues too, i was neutral about dickbabs and this run made me...not neutral. but i've heard from people that do like dickbabs that they don't like how they're written here so also, maybe you won't like it even if you like dickbabs??

but yeah!! these are my not-hated TT nightwing issues. i think there are a decent amount where i liked a line or panel here or there, but like overall most of it is just...not my fave. but you could like it!! which, i feel like it's worth saying that it's totally valid if you end up engaging with the run more and liking it. you wouldn't be the only person in the world to like it. but it's also ending in 4 issues thank god, so um don't get too attached if you end up digging it lmao

the red hood annual is also the annual i've liked for this run, i actually love that issue sm lol. the second annual is all about the Lamest Most Scariest Villain Ever, boring, and then the most recent was all about bea, dick's love interest in his ric era, which i was excited for...and hated. that one isn't even on TT, tho. travis moore your gorgeous dick is not enough to redeem you on that one. WAIT I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT-

thanks for the ask anon!! always good to practice loving your enemies i mean, i hope this helps, have fun <3

[aimwigs]

hey I've been listening to the yard for about a year and a half and I want to get more into it ifywim do I just start watching old vods to catch up or is there any content u can recommend as a baseline must-watch

this is by no means a comprehensive list because i've only really been watching the yard since dec 2022 and my 2021 stint in lud viewing was brief and casual (didn't know what i had) but it is a fucking long list so i'll keep it under the cut. included stuff that maybe i wouldn't classify as a must watch but i wanted to include it so you can pick and choose what interests you

PODCASTS - I know for a fact there are other podcast appearances out there that I don't know of but here are a few:

the yard x wine about it - it's just the four of them and qt which means good times! this is an essential imo

there are a few eps of fear& that they appear on! specifically rec the ep with nick and aiden and the ep with ludwig and aiden. there are also a few eps with ludwig and slime (not at the same time) if you're interested in those

i've watched aiden on three different interview podcasts all are worth a watch to me: karat interview, across the bar, and good griefed (audio a little scuffed on this one but it's cute)

fucking loved nick's ep of across the bar because his outlook on creativity is super relatable to me. he also did something with safety third that i've been meaning to watch but haven't yet!

VIDEOS AND STREAMS - there's a lot here but i'll try to describe what's what

mogul money ft the yard - this is the full vod, there's also a cut down video. extremely fun watch

nick was also on mogul money live (first game specifically) and he and aiden appear in the bts video a little bit

qt posted vlogs from italy! they're all fun watches and there's some good moments. one, two, three, four

qt and aiden halloween gingerbread house video. ludwig and aiden kiss in this one. i think the full vod is in god's hands unfortunately

qt and aiden make shit in an ezbake oven and make the guys eat it. fun little video. idk if the vod is out there somewhere or not

there's a cut down version of this too but the full stream of qt having all the guys do a gingerbread house competition is very peak

lud did a shit load of taste test videos with the guys for a slim jim sponsor. this might not be all of them but here are the ones i cold find off rip (fruit, cheese, chocolate, water, steak)

ludwig has done a shitload of ylyl streams with slime that you can find and honestly i have a horrible mediashare allergy so i haven't watched a lot of them but i have watched the one they did with aiden and the one with everyone but idk where the full vod is for the latter

from ludwig's fortnite mondays, there was a week where slime and nick played with jerma and sapnap. idk if any of the others posted the vod but here's sapnap's

the subathon has a shitload of stuff that i can't even begin to link but if you want the experience of the dcom series without subbing to tier 2 they watched the truman show starting about an hour thirty into this vod, tho it takes a hot minute to get everything lined up with the time stamps

halloween po unboxing where them + qt dress up as characters from scooby doo. nick looks frankly obscene as velma this is a great vod

how many flashlights does it take to cook an egg is exactly what it sounds like. it's lud slime and nick ft a little bit of yingo

they play the family feud game together in these two vods: just them and against miz/otk (can't stand miz but it was still good)

RECENT STUFF - aka stuff you probably know about or have seen because you've been around a year and a half but i figured i'd include them anyway since they happened off the pod

two months ago they all played fortnite on lud's stream and it was awesome

both the show matches of the ludwig tarik invitationals are worth watching if you're into valo! the first one is team mogul v otv and they're split up in the second. if the timestamps are broken it's 2h30 in both vods

the rivals 2 tournament is fun! i don't understand shit about fighting games but i love to see the boys play

cdawgva ski vod with lud and aiden from the japan trip! there's also a cut down version of youtube but i found it a fun watch

recency bias alert: they all played in creator dodgeball

the qt and aiden winter cocktail tierlist stream was so good like genuinely a stream of all time to me. ludwig hangs around for parts of it

the yard doing the dougdoug fast food challenge is a MUST WATCH! they celebrate and they suffer what could be more beautiful

otv's fear pong video with them is so fucking good. SO GOOD!

and finally i guess i should mention beerio because it just happened LOL

[wiltking]

(same person here) I would actually love a "starter fantasy list" or something similar, if you have anything like that! I've been trying to get back into fantasy lit as an adult, but i've admittedly had kind of a rough go of it.. :/ I like my fantasy best when it's weird and sincere, and that seems strangely harder to find now than it did when i was 8 and spending every second of my free time in the library. But maybe I'm just more jaded now, IDK. i'd appreciate any recs you've got, though! i haven't had much energy for reading recently, but i really, really want to get back to it this year. fingers crossed

also i feel like i should say that i don't...necessarily hate urban fantasy, under the right conditions it can be fun, I'm pretty sure I just got exposed to wayyyy too much of it when i was a high schooler and now i've built up some kind of resistance to it. it was completely inescapable (in my circles) in the 2010s and now it's like i can smell the genre conventions from a mile away. so if you have urban fantasy recs i wouldn't turn them down! it's just not suuuper high on my preference list

secret ending note: I know your main thing is drawing, but I'm pretty sure you like to write too - I remember you saying something a long time ago about how one of the main things that motivates you to write gay fiction is spite that there isn't better stuff out there already. and, tbh? my writing muscles are REALLY rusty, but if it turns out the only way to get the fantasy i want is that i have to write it my god damned self, then i /will/ pick up the pen again, faustian bargain though that may be

luckily for you i like to think 'weird and sincere' is my driving force. here's 5 titles in ascending order of density/difficulty, with each being either a single novel or duology: 1. Lord of the While Hell by ginn hale 2. The Fire's Stone by tanya huff 3. Obsidian Island by arden powell (*horror fantasy, but whimsical) 4. The Still by David Feintuch 5. Ariah by B.R. Sanders

If you're ready for weirder books or longer series, you can check out these lists:

M/M Fantasy Rec lists - my favorite m/m fantasies, no YA, though i'm very much a series guy and these recs might be a little overwhelming!

Old(er) LGBT Book recs - as it says on the tin, pre-2010 adult books with queer characters. some overlap with the m/m list but also contains scifi, and other types of queer fantasies

and yes, i still write! i've been throwing my head at the keyboard with spite and sincerity in my veins for a few years now. most of what i have available is fanfiction (a great way to get back into writing, imo) but i have originals in the works too. it definitely helps keep me sane, and writing for the sake of making the stories you want to read is one of the best reasons to go for it. best of luck!!

[meruz]

another ask post

i mean i also read it because a friend whos rly into queer SFF fiction circles recced it but she did kinda lead with "the writer used to write hs fanfic...tasmyn..taz...?" to which i replied

of COURSE I read the locked tomb because i heard taz had written a book. of course. ill consume most any media made by a beloved homestuck bnf. thats also why i played undertale. and read like..snotgirl. and idk... watched the new dub of neon genesis evangelion.

if u made homestuck fanwork 10 years ago and havent even made it since chances are I still remember and I love you for it.

sdlkfhsg its funny you sensed that because that drawing did in fact start kinda more........ well, I'd be lying if I said my hands never wrought a drawing toeing over the pg-13 line LOL...

NOT to say i have a secret stash of porn or anything. in general im more interested in the implication of sexuality or mature themes over any explicit depiction. like everything i draw is so softcore itd almost feel silly to make a nsfw acc for anything.

but im not rly jumping to post anything on main either bc i get the sense i have a lot of kids in my social media following. it varies from site to site and fandom to fandom but the themes in my work often circle around childhood, coming of age etc and in general i like stories about kids so the fandoms i draw for have a lot of kids in them. even stuff like IT (stephen king) which is about kids but isn't necessarily for kids.. there were a lot of kids in that fandom lol.

actually thats why ive been censoring swears in comics lately because the tmnt fandom comes across to me as a little young...IDK I've had MULTIPLE people ask me what "sodomize" means because of the joke in this post and I'm like... I Cannot be the one to explain this to you. you have to look it up on your own klfsdhsdg like i wouldn't be doing this if i were doing a comic for mgs or even homestuck wherein the characters textually swear constantly LOL but sometimes u gotta change tacks depending on the faces u see in the crowd yknow.

i HAVE been thinking abt drawing nsfw of sunspot/richard rider/kobak from x-men red just because that comic seemed to be really asking for it. who knows.. if the need rly arises maybe my separate account policy will change.

its rly more a matter of the fact that i havent read/watched much of any other iterations... im sure id like most lol. I like most things related to my interests regardless of quality. i rly like the marvel ultimate alliance games for instance. sometimes seeing my fave guy is enough he doesnt have to be well written LOL. i dont exactly have a wealth of free time tho thats the real impediment.

i did watch the 2007 movie on new years eve and found it quite charming overall. and i have read about 30-40 issues between the mirage and idw comics. still feels like im barely scratching the surface but i liked em. i rly want to read all the sophie campbell stuff bc i think her work is interesting. jason aaron will be a mixed bag i think lmao. i say as the worlds biggest Wolverine and the X-Men (2011) fan.

hmm this is kinda hard bc i feel like i naturally draw very loose and the hard part for me is tightening it up. maybe some suggestions tho...

1) hand excercises. i think its easy to forget this when many artists sit in front of the computer all day but drawing is a physical activity u do with ur actual...bodys...muscles lol. if u feel urself tightening up it might help to strech (any google search for "artist hand excercises" should yield good results) or do a page of loose practice strokes like..big circles. long lines. scribbles. that kinda thing. whatever feels good for ur hand. this is also just good to do as a general warm up before u sit down for any drawing sesh.

2) draw further away from the canvas. as a general rule...when ur painting traditionally you do the big strokes with your whole arm outstreched and a long handled brush. and when you do the details its smaller wrist movements and a shorter handled brush. so it might help to take a step back or push back from ur chair a little.. or hold ur tablet a little further away. and hold your pen further away from the nib.

3) change mediums / brush types. some brushes and mediums are more suited to loose sketching and some more inclined towards detail work. so changing ur tool could help. also! i personally have this problem where sometimes if im using a brush i feel really familiar with the pressure to make a "good" "finished" "perfect" drawing is greater... if i want to force myself to loosen up ill switch to a tool i dont use as often so it feels like the pressure is off. a lot of times for me this is switching from digital to traditional. but sometimes its switching from a small pen to a big marker. or a smooth pen to a textured one. or a nice brush to a shitty dried up marker.

but also every body is different so i dont think these tips will work for everyone. u should listen to what ur body and mind tell u and how drawing feels to you

bro just sign up and set it up i dont think theres much to it... i dont rly think too much abt my itch.io store because its digital goods so u just upload the file and let it do its thing. no distribution work needed on ur part. youll notice i barely even advertise my itch unless i have smth new on there lol.. its easy. but good luck!!!

idk if im the best person to ask this im more a comic fan than i am a comic professional... a comic hobbist.

well. scott mcclouds understanding comics and making comics are good books on the craft. i think i had to buy them for a class in art school once.

other than that idk just keep at it. comics are really laborious i think for a lot of people the hardest part is sitting down and doing it.

i think a lot of people have a very instinctive understanding of how to read comics and what they look like so whatever you think seems like good way to tell the story you have in mind, its probably right. if u get stuck, study comics that have done something similar. most people in comics are relatively self taught and actually it can be problematic bc you can tell when a lot of comic artists are all copying the same like 5 old white guys LMAO. but on the flip side if you make sure to reference and study broadly your comics will almost assuredly feel unique.

sorry im responding to this anyways. this is just a really nice ask. i like when people reference my older work bc i feel like sometimes theyre subtly implying it wasnt very good LMAOOO. but its true! at least compared to the work i make now ^^ and the fact that im still making art is whats keeping me from being embarassed abt how much of my old art just floats around online lmao im never ashamed to be growing and learning. isnt that a nice thought <3

[the-blind-assassin-12]

20 Questions for Writers

I was tagged by the lovely @maggiemayhemnj - thank you!!

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

Ten. I was cross-posting everything for a minute there, but I lost steam and now I only post here - except for Aphelion, which I am co-writing with @something-tofightfor. That still gets posted in both places.

2. what's your total AO3 word count?

68,449 - not counting Aphelion. My tumblr word count is... a lot higher.

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Right now just Pedro Pascal characters.

4. top five fics by kudos?

Gonna go by notes on tumblr instead because that's where most of my stuff is:

Bes'laar Din Djarin x F!Reader (based on artwork by @stealyourblorbos!)

Survivor Blues Joel Miller x F!Reader

Forever Din Djarin x F!Reader

The Cold Offends Me Oberyn Martell x F!Reader (The Viper & The Wild Thing universe)

Point of No Return Ezra x OFC Clara

5. do you respond to comments?

I try to respond to all comments because I appreciate them SO MUCH MORE than I can accurately convey. I love hearing from people about what they liked or what shocked them or what made them feel things, and I really love the chance to sort of have a micro mini chat about it in the comments. That being said, sometimes I completely check out and miss a whole batch or a whole fic worth of comments goes unresponded to for far too long. And I always feel bad when that happens, which sometimes results in me responding to things WAY after the comments were left, to the point where it wouldn't surprise me if the person has already forgotten the fic/what they wrote... but I haven't forgotten how much it meant to me that they read and commented on my work. So even if it's 6 months to an eternity late, I intend to respond to them all.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It Pours From Your Eyes Joel x Tess

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I feel like most of them have happy endings, but we'll go with A Little Christmas Magic - Frankie x F!Reader as perhaps the fluffiest happy ending.

8. do you get hate on fics?

I have gotten non-fic specific hate directed at my writing before, but that was a few years ago and it hasn't happened since. Which is cool because the fewer people wasting their time and energy on being unnecessarily mean about things - let alone about stories about silly little fictional guys - the better.

9. do you write smut?

I do, but I do not consider it one of my strong suits, and I typically only include it if it fits with the overall story though a few times I have written smut just to be filthy as a challenge... and as a treat.

10. craziest crossover?

I've been slowly spinning a True Detective x Tim Rockford crossover like a rotisserie chicken for months but I've only managed to jot down a few unconnected snippets thus far. And a title. It's gonna be called (maybe, if I ever actually write it) Flat Circle, Twisted Game.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, but if I did I would be absolutely PISSED. And I can't say I'd be nice about it.

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, but that would be cool AF.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! I am currently co-writing Aphelion with @something-tofightfor and it is so much FUN.

14. all time favorite ship?

In all honesty it's probably Leslie Knope and Ben Wyatt. I was straight up ready to stop watching Parks and Rec if they didn't end up together.

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

lol what kind of passive aggressive, self-doubt feeding question is this? I'd like to finish them all and I try like hell to believe that I will.

16. what are your writing strengths?

I think it's probably describing natural settings? But maybe dialogue. Idk.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Smut. Also keeping the momentum to finish things in a timely fashion, but mostly smut.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I try to only use it when it makes sense or when it benefits the story and not just as like... a novelty or an afterthought.

19. first fandom you wrote in?

Teeeeeeeeeeechnically? Like first one I ever made content for? I guess that would be the Twilight series. But I will not be sharing where to find that here. And if you find out where it is, you take that knowledge to the grave with you, you hear me? DO YOU HEAR ME, FRIENDS?

20. favorite fic you've written?

Even though it's nowhere near done, I love and am so very proud of Survivor Blues. But then again, even though it's a few years old now and I feel like my writing has grown since finishing it, Point of No Return will always have a very big piece of my heart.

Tagging: anyone who sees this and wants to play! Please tag me so I can see your answers!!

[sleepy-vix]

hello hello hello!! i hope this day is treating you well <3

so. erm. i finished if we were villains one second ago. there are tear tracks still glistening on my face. and i have Thoughts TM

to be frank i wasn't a fan of most of the book (i found the very excessive shakespeare-quoting stilted, pretentious and cringey — and i'm saying this as a person who quotes shakespeare too much for the average sane person and is very annoying about it) but something changed when i was reading act five. i then proceeded to cry through the end bit of act five and the whole epilogue.

i have no idea what i feel about it skjfksdfj i have no idea when i started caring about these pretentious ass bitches enough to cry over them, seeing that for most of the book i was just incredibly annoyed by all of them. although i am proud to say i clocked james and oliver for what they were in their first few interactions. the power of the gaydar ladies and gents

i think part of the problem was that i was comparing it to the secret history so much in my mind (which is practically literary perfection in my mind. i personally believe that donna tartt is a greek muse in disguise and should be treated as such/j) it just paled in comparison — honestly, people need to stop comparing the two or just lumping them into "dark academia" (i'm personally not the hugest fan of aesthetic-based grouping for book recs, but that's a rant for another day)

i think it's a one-time read for me. like yes it was definitely an... interesting experience but probably not good enough to reread? i don't know?? i have zero idea if you like this book or not i just know that you've read it — so apologies if i accidentally offended you or something 😭😭 i would love to hear your thoughts on it though (especially the ending)!

I READ IT BACK IN GRADE 8 DURING THE SUMMER HOLIDAYS AND I WAS JUST DEPRESSED FOR THE WHOLE 8 WEEKS LMAO

im like ehhh about it now 😭 which is sad because i was so obsessed with it i made a playlist for james and oliver (im such a geek it's actually so embarrassing 💀)

also i completely agree with you about the shakespeare quotes. it got to a point where i would just skip the quotes and only read the actual writing because is it ever THAT serious?

also i have a few other icks about the book:

- oliver and meredith getting together (that was so ???? like i lowkey hated oliver for that)

- filippa's character. it was so ?? like m.l. rio did such a bad job writing her... the idea of her character is awesome but the execution was really not, which was disappointing.

but in general i really liked it :) i read it before the secret history, so thankfully i never unconsciously compared them with eachother (which i've heard is actually really common between people who read tsh first).

i agree with you in the dark academia lumping thing sooo much. like, you often see them side by side, but the only thing they have in common is a friend group + one person dies + school setting. which really doesn't mean much considering that alot of stories are set in schools and include friend groups.

also not to mention that tsh is twice the size of iwwv 😭 idk i get so defensive when ppl bash iwwv for being worse than tsh (even tho i agree)

tbh i loved it alot but i wouldn't reread it either because the oliver and meredith parts where so 💀

m.l. rio is writing another book btw! its called grave digger. im looking forward to it because i'd like to know if she's actually a good writer or if she was only good in my 13 year old mind.

im so happy that u sent me this ask :)) its not very often that i get to talk abt iwwv with a person who agrees with me that the book is sad but not that good

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

(Self hating content incoming sorry if you don't wanna answer) I'm a grey ace lesbian and honestly I just wish so badly that I wasn't. I'm so scared that even other queer women won't want me, I know that realistically my odds of finding someone who's compatible aren't good, and honestly I just don't want to have to deal with all this. I wish I wasn't scared to even casually date half the time because I'm so afraid no one who isn't also ace is ever going to want me so it feels like I'd be

(self-doubting greyace lesbian anon pt 2) Like it wouldn't be fair to expect someone who wasn't ace to stick around for maybe a regular relationship. I want love and I wish I enjoyed more than the idea of sex more than once in a blue moon, is that so wrong? And it's so hard to not feel like i got cheated by the universe and resent my identity. I don't want to drag other ppl down so I just bottle these feelings up plus idk if I can afford therapy rn. I just wish I could make my peace with this.

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, Anon. It sounds like there's two issues going on, the first is finding a partner you're compatible, and the second is self-acceptance in general.

I'd focus on self acceptance to start. Start following ace spectrum blogs (both ace themed, and people who just happen to be ace spectrum). If you can lesbian ace spec stuff, even better. And consider joining communities. Check and see if there's any in-person ace meetups near you, or think about joining online communities like a discord server or similar. It can help a lot to regularly see real aces who are dealing with the same or similar things as you so you're not always comparing yourself to the same standards as allos.

Seek out ace media, there's a lot of books and podcasts out there especially and you can find rec lists. Find characters who you relate to.

Remember too that your value is not in your relationship status, build yourself up. Learn a new skill or take up a fun hobby (or build on ones you already have). Build up your self esteem and self worth. This isn't giving up on dating, but it will help you value yourself no matter how things are going on that front, and will help you be in a good place when you do meet someone who is compatible with you.

Generally speaking there are actually a lot of aces out there (even if you take the conservative 1-2% estimate, which is almost definitely underestimating, that's still over a thousand aces in any city with a population of 1 million or more. They can just be hard to find, but I have known a lot of aces who have successfully found ace dating partners and found good relationships, so remember it is possible.

We do absolutely need better ways of finding each other, especially for dating purposes. In the meantime though there are dating apps that let you give your orientation as ace, and seek out other aces, and there are communities around. As visibility increases, this is getting better though. So even if you try and date withing the ace community, you do still have options.

There are also allo people who aren't as big on sex, or don't mind going without or not having sex very often, though that can be like looking for a needle in a haystack because of societal expectations. But they do exist.

So try your best not to give up hope, and to keep trying to meet people. What you want is possible and something others have succeeded at too.

All the best, Anon! And good luck!

[starlingflight]

I’m trying to dive into more of your fics, and more Hinny:

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

❌ what trope will you never write?

Also, do you have any advice on writing Ginny and showing her characteristics?

(also, I’m sorry you are going through a tough time 🫂 hopefully things get better 💐 )

Girl, I can give you so many hinny recs (not written by me lol)!

🛒 common things you incorporate into fics (Themes, feels, scenes, imagery)

I like to play with the 'love is the strongest form of magic' theme from canon!

For hinny, the thing I try to incorporate the most is humour, but I've been dipping my toe more into their angsty side with the bingo drabbles which has been fun!

❌️ trope I will never write:

I had to think about this one for ages but I think the answer is time travel... not because I don't like it (I love reading it), I just know I wouldn't do it justice.

I sometimes day dream about time travel scenarios but I wouldn't want to change anything I'd just want to see the characters reactions (think Hary's reaction if married Hinny showed up in Grimmauld Place in OotP), so there would literally be no purpose to it and it would be very unsatisfying 😂

Advice on writing Ginny:

Idk if I'm qualified to give advice, but when writing Ginny it's really tempting to fall into the trap of making her 'fiery' and a bit of a walking quip machine without considering the more vulnerable side of her (she does like to keep it well-hidden)! I think keeping in mind her insecurities and her caring side and incorporating them in to her personality is super important and what I try to do when writing her!

Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️

[mermaidsirennikita]

Could you rec HR with the hero having a...idk, I don't want to say disability (?) Idk if that's the correct word, but the hero has a limp, or a backache or he can't walk that much without getting tired, he needs a cane, can't see properly, something like that, he ain't that healthy like the usual males from the romances

I'm not an expert on the terminology, but I do think "disabled romance heroes" is an acceptable term based on what I've seen in discussions. However, it's not universally agreed upon (nothing is) and in real life it would obviously very case by case. Gently, I would suggest not using terms like "healthy", etc--I have a condition that qualifies as a disability, but I'm not really comfortable with identifying myself as disabled (at this time in my life) and physically I'm overall pretty "healthy". I wouldn't begrudge anyone with the same condition for feeling otherwise, etc. Like I said, things like this are super individualized! But I appreciate you wanting to use the correct terminology, there isn't a single right answer but we can (and should) always try.

But yes! Historical romance heroes with disabilities. I'd check out:

Rules for Engaging the Earl by Janna MacGregor. The hero is a veteran with chronic pain and a limp/mobility issues. He uses a cane, and this is something that affects his sex life with the heroine--not a lot, he just can't do certain positions, and it doesn't negatively impact them. They get more creative (it's hot). It's a really sweet, gentle read; there's a lovely scene where she takes care of his leg when I think he's initially anxious about it. Obviously, this turns into a BJ, because... why wouldn't it...

My Darling Duke by Stacy Reid. Super romantic one here, with top tier tension. The hero was injured years ago in an accident, and though he can technically walk, ride, and stand, it's very difficult and he uses a wheelchair most of the time. He also has it in his head that he's impotent--I'll add that Reid does make it clear that one of his more progressive doctors is like "yeah I'm pretty sure that you have a mental block and CAN have sex" but, what with the mental block, the hero is like "NO I CAN'T WHICH IS WHY I CANNOT BE WITH HER".

Surrender to the Devil by Lorraine Heath. The hero has progressive vision loss; he will eventually be completely blind, and he's really upset about it. I will add a TW--this book does deal with childhood sexual abuse experienced by the heroine, as well as the domestic abuse of a supporting character.

Flowers from the Storm by Laura Kinsale. Probably the best example of this! The hero is a famous rake, but he has a stroke at the beginning of the book, which leaves him in a state the people around him call "madness". He initially can't speak and has some mobility issues. Mentally, he's totally there--he has issues processing language. The heroine ends up seeing him in a asylum (they met before his stroke) and ends up helping him. It's super romantic, and Kinsale writes his experience in an incredible way.

Dearest Rogue by Elizabeth Hoyt is known for the heroine being blind, but the hero actually has a mobility limitation due to an injury he got on the job. I forget exactly what it was, but it took him off said job, so.

Edit, silly me, forgot:

When The Earl Met His Match by Stacy Reid. Hero was born unable to speak--he's verbal, but he lacks speech, so he writes and signs. The heroine ends up learning how to sign and it's super romantic.

Still haven't read these yet, but Joanna Shupe's A Notorious Vow has a deaf hero, and Romancing the Duke by Tessa Dare has a blind hero.

[irritablepoe]

Do you like any scary movies and if so what are some ones you have enjoyed? Are there any types (like ghosts, slashers, body horror, etc.) that scare you too much or that you wouldn't want on even around you or no?

Unfortunately I have not watched many scary movies (mostly because I don't watch a lot of movies lol but also I'm not fond of jumpscares💀). From what I can remember I watched resident evil part 1 but didn't like it at all (generally not a fan of zombies and the whole infection thing), then "it" which was good and some older vampire movies which I watched really young and which were mostly entertaining to me lol (I... Do not remember the name, I think it was the fearless vampire killer but I couldn't be sure lol). Also watched jaws which didn't leave an impression on me. And idk if the Edgar Wallace movies count, they're more of a mystery type though, with a murder in the beginning and everything leading up to exposing the culprit? What really rearranged my dna was van helsing (2004) but idk if that's horror tbh?💀 Generally I like other media when it comes to horror though, like books and magazines, podcasts (hehehhehe tma 👀) and horror games, big fan of the chillas art games and the faith of fathom episodes, also mortuary assistant and observation duty have taken over my brain a lot :3 soo ig most of the horror I like is more in the mundane, probably more psychological horror, stalking, something just being off but you can barely put your finger on it. What I don't like at all is dolls or clowns or ghosts who are children being used in horror I'm sorry this is terrifying help😭 ghost in general are fine though, especially if they're not shown. also a bit off topic but I don't like movies like Inception too, I know it's not officially horror but to me it is oki, wdym he doesn't care if he's dreaming or not I'd be fucking paranoid af, stoppppppp😤 anyways sorry for the rant I don't know if this was at all helpful💀 if you have some recs for horror movies gladly lmk though, I wanted to watch more movies anyways (especially older ones with more practical effects, love that shit)

[liesmyth]

Heyy bit of an odd ask but I'm trying to learn Italian and I was wondering if you had any tips? Idk I know you obv didn't have to. Actively Learn it bc it's your mother tongue (afaik?) but just if you had any resources or general language learning tips, i'd super duper appreciate 🙏 even like. Tv shows or books you can recommend for beginners !!

HI! ok so I'm probably not a good person to ask specific recs to because, yeah, it's my first language, but I always recommend checking out reddit for language learning stuff because there are so many resources out there (r/ItalianLearning) — some posts: ONE, TWO, THREE

I would also add that in my experience, children's books are pretty good for grasping basic language. Like, if you can get your hands on an italian translation of a children's book you're very familiar with in your native language / in English, and try to reread it again in your target language, that could be useful. ALSO once you get far enough there are some italian language films / tv shows on netflix and similar platforms, but I'd recommend checking on a case-by-case basis (again using reddit, or HMU whenever!) if you're trying to learn italian by watching TV, because some very popular Italian shows have lots of dialect and I wouldn't recommend them to someone who's not already a fluent speaker (like: Montalbano, Gomorra, and similar)

I hope this helps! If anyone seeing this is actually actively trying to learn italian please feel free to jump in

[salemoleander]

I hated how gdocs won't let you do dark mode*, so I went hunting for alternative document apps, and now I'm smitten with Calmly Writer.** Tried its web-based version, loved it, and just (voluntarily- you can use it for free) paid $15 for the desktop app version.

It's lovely, extremely uncluttered, and has all the options I personally want in a writing app (bold/italics/headers, basic image capabilities, dark mode, multiple doc tabs open at once, a few color customizations, and basically nothing else.) This would not work for MANY people - it wouldn't work for me at work, even - but as a creative writing workspace that removes anything unecessary it is IDEAL.

Turning on and off certain utilities like spellcheck or auto-correcting quotation marks into directional quotes are just checkboxes, no hunting through menus. That's about as complicated as it gets.

Also you can turn on typewriter noises and they make my brain happy :D It has a few other themes - including a sandy theme that's nice if you like light but not fluorescent white pages - and overall I would def recommend ^.^

*Yes I know if you go into the dev settings menus in Chrome you can enable a kind of janky forced dark mode. I use Firefox, and also that setting frequently caused color problems with other sites. Also that wasn't my only issue with gdocs, just the biggest

**I realize this is written not unlike an ad read - I am not getting money for this lmao. I just really like this app & thought I'd spend a moment reccing it bc it rules, and I imagine I can't be the only writer who's like 'wow I want to light gdocs on fire but idk what else is good'.

[jess-quillkiller]

SONG RECS HUH?

OK

HERE YOU GO

Notre Dame-Paris Paloma

Rabbit Run- City Calm Down

Teach Me About Dying-Holy Holy

When I Can't Sleep-Pascal Pinon

Symphony-Maggie Rogers

Fools gold-Briston Maroney

Alaska - Maggie Rogers

Helen of Troy - Lorde

THE ENTIRE ALBUM OF PETROL BLOOM BY LAUREL

Which ones you like and don't like because I'm curious

I won't be offended if you don't like any or something, promise :)

HIHIHIHIHII TYSMMM FOR THE RECS <33 im gonna explain how much i like them and why and give them a rating [just in my opinion, music tastes r different and my opinion clearly doesn't determine how good a song/singer is !!]

sorry if this is boring i love music ‼️‼️

notre dame - this song is so niceee, the voice is so calming yet desperate? idk if that's the right way to describe it, but it's how i'm gonna. i love how the instruments go together erheregehhss!!! ALSO THE LYRICS. they're so pretty, this song is so pretty. definitely different to my music style, but i still loved it. i'd say a 7.5/10 :]

rabbit run - this one is so cool, not really my type of song tho!! it's got like an upbeat sound but then sadder lyrics which i love ! <3 i really like that in the first verse + chorus it's kinda slower and then speeds up + changes tempo (? idk im not good in music terminology) it just makes it sound sm cooler ehagdjhasg!! 5.7/10 !

teach me about dying - I LOVE THIS ONE its got upbeat music from the start, and the sadder lyrics like i loved in the prev one ! but its also saying "teach me about dying, so i can learn how to live." which to me is saying you need to see the bad before you can properly see the good? it also has this 80s feel i really like it! 9/10

when i can't sleep - the intro really reminded me of pink pony club by chappell roan. it's really soft and prettyyyy ! Idk how else to describe this other than delicate and oceany! 8/10

symphony - aagfhgoossh ur music taste is actually so pretty, i love these sm. i think this one may be closer to music i listen to !! 9.5/10 !!!

fool's gold - this one's not rly my style, but i wouldn't mind listening to it [like if im listening to music with friends]. still loved the lyrics, the meaning in them's quiet evident ! 4.5/10 (i'm giving everything .5s oopsies)

alaska - i think uve started an obsession with maggie rogers for me, her voice is so pretty and she fits right with the instruments so well (that sounds weird but wtv!!) 9/10

helen of troy - I FORGOT ABT LORDE I HAVENT HEARD HER IN SO LONG. she's so good, i never really got into her but i'm def adding this song to my playlist!! the chorus is so HSUSIABDYX7AI its js a delicious song i love it. 9/10

+ i'm gonna rate the album tomorrow because i'm so tired rn it's 1am 😔😔 which is also why i'm very sorry if some of this doesn't make sense

sorry for rambling, i am js very happy somebody recommended me music hehehehe ‼️‼️

[purplesurveys]

1896

20 random people... Don't look at the questions beforehand! :D

Nina

Celeste

Hans

Lui

Kaye

Angela

Mom

Reena

Gabie

Kuya

Pau

Jo

Lei

Andi

Leigh

Marie

Dad

Dev

Sam

Pia

Ok, here we go...

How did you meet #4?: College org. I was an applicant at the time, they were already a member, and they seemed very friendly to all the newbies so I stuck around them. In time we became close and even got in the same friend group, which we're both still part of today.

How much does #9 mean to you?: She's a co-worker so while I wouldn't, like, die for her per se or can say that she's 'everything' to me, I'd look out for her nonetheless.

Describe #14 in 2 words.: Extremely intelligent.

What is your best memory with #5?: I loved when she came over to watch YTC Busan live with us! That was also such a random mix of friends to end up happening, so I was anxious they'd all be opposites – but it got really fun.

Do you know all of #2's secrets?: I know none of them seeing as we're only workmates and I like my boundaries.

When is the next time you're going to see #7?: In an hour or two, I'm guessing. She went out for a bit for errands.

When's the last time you saw #17?: 2 AM, Friday – dropped him off at the airport. From there, I won't be seeing him again until November.

How do you think #13 feels about you?: After trying to teach me one of her party card games last Sunday, I bet she now thinks I can get ditzy as all hell hahaha. But apart from that I don't know what else she thinks of me! We rarely see each other and are always shy when we do, lol.

Are #11 and #12 anything like each other?: Quite the contrary; they're a good example of how two people cannot be any more different.

Describe the relationship between #14 and #19.: They have a nonexistent relationship, but if we're gonna be extremely loose about degrees of separation – Hans went to the same school as Andi (#14); they both also were schoolmates with Gab, who used to date Sam (#19).

Is #10 single?: No. Has been engaged for a while now, too.

If you could tell #8 one thing right now, what would it be?: Let's go out soon and maybe we can try a new hobby together, too.

What is the funniest thing you've ever seen #16 do?: I haven't had many funny encounters with her tbh as she's kind of shy and doesn't really want to put herself out there – that, and we've always worked from home.

Can I name coolest instead? There was a time when my teammates and I each needed to make 10-slider decks about any topic (meant to be an exercise on public speaking); and she had what I thought was the most unique and personally relatable presentation – she covered her favorite lesbian media. Music, movies...and there's a bunch in there that I was able to relate to...just cause of my past, I guess. Haha. It felt pretty bittersweet, and I gave her some of my recs too.

How did you meet #15?: School. I can't remember when we got close, though. Maybe in high school if I had to guess – we stay friends these days, too, as she's with Andi.

What would you do if #4 died?: I'd be shocked to say the least. I'm imagining that'd bring the college friend group back together again.

What's the weirdest thing you've ever seen #3 do?: He had a brief stint as a camp...something (guide? counselor? idk terms) in the US a few years ago, so when he came back the first thing he did to me was share a bunch of camp songs he picked up from his time there. After he taught me, he proceeded to sing them all to entire time hahaha.

Are you friends with any of #19's friends?: Not with most of them. We only have a few mutual friends, all linked to Angela/Hans.

Who is #7 to you?: My mom.

What is one thing #13 is really good at?: I'm gonna go with biology and chemistry as she's literally a licensed pharmacist.

What would happen if #1 and #3 hated each other?: That would crush me, tbh. Hans is family at this point, and it'd be sad if he and my sister actively disliked one another.

Is #11 anything like #18?: I guess. Very surface-level similarities, but yeah. They're both leaders, their personalities are both pretty nonchalant...that's what I can think of now.

How much trust do you have in #12?: Lots, in the grand scheme of things. Jo is reliable and trustworthy.

If you fell off a bridge, who would you trust to catch you, #4 or #6? Why?: Angela, 100%. We're exponentially so much closer.

Who do you like the most?: It's a tie between my dad and Angela.

Who do you hate the most?: I didn't put in anyone I dislike.

How did you meet #1?: I would guess she was introduced as my little sister when I was 2.

What would you do if you never met #14?: I probably never would've gotten back into wrestling.

Would you date #20?: Hypothetically, in another universe – sure, why not? She's pretty and so so so SO ridiculously kind and has just such a warm personality.

Have you ever seen #8 cry?: Just once. We cried together at the time, but they were happy tears.

Would #5 and #13 make a good couple?: I've never thought of that. But I don't think so.

Describe #9.: I don't know her much outside of work, but from what I've seen she's hardworking; has a sensitive side in that she doesn't really like getting scolded; and she's a million times friendlier than I am – she gets along with everyone which makes her such an important part of the team. You gotta have an extrovert in PR, and she's that.

Do you like #16?: Yes.

Do you think #4 is attractive?: Personally not my type.

When's the last time you talked to #19?: Around two weeks ago.

Would you date #10?: Hard pass, that's my cousin.

What's the best thing about #15?: She has this innocent and pure aura around her that I adore very much. Like she can never get mad at anything and anyone.

Best thing about #7?: She's very resilient.

Have you ever kissed #11?: Nope.

Have you ever slapped #18?: I've never slapped any one person on the list.

When's the next time you're going to see #12?: I have no idea, our group rarely makes plans to see each other anymore. The last time I saw her was mid-2023 and we didn't even get to meet up after to talk about our Yoongi concert experiences like we planned.

Is #16 pretty?: Yes!

What was your first impression of #4?: Kind, approachable, helpful, reliable, older than me.

Is #13 your BFF?: No.

Have you seen #15 in the last month?: I haven't seen her in years actually lol. Andi and I hang out all the time and I always check in if Leigh will be tagging along...and she just doesn't.

Have you been to #20's house?: I have not. We're not that close.

Last time you saw #14?: April! We watched a wrestling gig. I'll be seeing them again later this month for trivia night – they added me to their team because two of the topics will be Friends and BTS, haha.

Next time you'll see #10?: Tomorrow, I'm guessing! We'll be coming over tomorrow and I think he'll by home.

Are you really close to #1?: Not heart-to-heart talk levels because we're a dysfunctional family and can't bear baring our souls to one another LOL – but it's a close-friend type of close for sure.

Would you give #20 a hug?: Sure. I'm sure I hugged her a few times when we saw each other 2 weeks ago at our surprise engagement party for Angela and Hans.

Tell me a secret about #5.: I don't know her enough to know her secrets.

Describe the relationship between #14 and #3: They were schoolmates in grade school until Andi moved.

What's your relationship with #5?: She's one of the school friendships I've been able to retain all these years. We're not best friends but we check in on one another from time to time.

Have you ever danced with #18?: I have not.

How do you know #13?: She's my closest cousin on my dad's side.

Does #2 have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: I don't think so. She had a dating phase early in the year, but I haven't heard much updates from her since.

Have you ever wanted to punch #6 in the face?: Maybe just once, heh.

Has #11 ever met your mother?: Nope.

Have you traveled anywhere with #12?: Nah. We could've, for Yoongi's tour! But I ended up in Thailand, she in Singapore.

If you gave #7 $100, what would they spend it on?: Probably on groceries.

Best memory of #2?: One of our events where we both ended up fairly tipsy.

What is one thing you most want #14 to know?: That I always feel bad for being the occasional terrible replier, but I hope they know that I always love it when they message and send me the most random questions or rants.

What's the last thing you did with #15?: I honestly have no clue. She's the one I've seen the least often.

When did you meet #8?: We first met around six years ago, when Angela brought us together for some drinks. We never talked again until 2021 when it was Angela (again) who put the three of us in the same chat since we all liked BTS. We got super close from there.

What do you wish for #17?: Good health is #1. It's something I find myself thinking about more often now; and for him not to feel lonely and sad when he's away.