#idk if anyone else cares about this but it needed to escape my skull

[riccissance]

thinking about this in the context of the chapter i’m writing of my current fic and it’s driving me bonkers. jackie had been a girl and then shauna made her a god, and she was shauna’s god for so much longer than she was her friend.

but now shauna is back with jackie the girl and good news! no more suffering necessary because jackie never actually wanted that from shauna! but she’s asking shauna for honesty which is actually so much worse because shauna’s entire life and identity is a (not so) carefully constructed tower of lies that she can’t dismantle without destroying herself.

so what now? when the god is dead but the girl is here and she only wants what will tear you apart?

jackieshauna and sainthood is such a rich topic and it's been stuck in my head for a while now. jackie definitely has saint vibes, but i think there's an argument to be made that shauna is the saint and jackie is the god she devotes her life to. shauna constructs this elaborate shrine of punishment and shame that at it's core is a twisted form of worship. she suffers because of jackie and she suffers for jackie and that suffering defines her entire existence. the saints are all tragic, after all. and it adds another layer to their connection if shauna sees jackie as her saint but shauna has actually become the saint, just like she tried to become jackie. it's yet another form of consumption and jackie's actual body was the communion that started it all

i also love the idea of saints having visions of god while shauna gets visions of jackie

[magniloquent-raven]

something occurred to me and if i don't let it out now it's gonna bore a hole in my skull tryna escape, so. um. it's always really bothered me that stranger things doesn't really do anything to address that eleven's hero complex is...not a good thing? like, i kind of hoped her character arc was going somewhere with it when she made the decision in s2 to save her friends (knowing that they couldn't save her in return). like, her being there for them was a good starting point, that's her figuring out who she is, but then she grows from there and learns to rely on them too.

except s4 doubled down on her being the sole saviour of the entire group.

it's been a while since i've watched the whole series in it's entirety so forgive me if i'm forgetting something, but none of her friends ever do anything significant to directly save her life, do they. the kids burning the tunnels as a distraction in s2 is the only thing i can think of and....idk it's just not the same? she has repeatedly put her life on the line and sacrificed her emotional/physical well-being to keep her friends safe, and i'm not saying she should be keeping score and billing these people for her time and effort but relationships are supposed to be give and take, ok. and she's giving a lot more than anyone else. which the show doesn't seem that concerned about.

and while i was thinking about the fact that she's constantly putting herself in danger for the people she cares about and none of her friends ever seem to do the same, i remembered that...billy did. billy, who didn't get the care and concern that will did when he was possessed. billy, who's been hurt and abused his whole life and abandoned by the only person who ever protected him from it.

an argument could be made that el doesn't need the same amount of saving that her friends do, she has the power to help them, she can defend herself, so of course she's always the one putting herself in harms way. but i just. can't stop thinking about the fact that when she was at her most vulnerable, it wasn't the people she's spent the past few years protecting who stepped up to save her, it was billy. meanwhile mike and will couldn't even save her from a fucking milkshake.

i needed more of billy stepping up to protect el, and max, realizing he's doing it because it's instinct, because he cares, not because neil told him he had to. i needed more of el seeing herself in billy. haunted by their absent mothers and controlling fathers, constantly told they needed to be responsible for the safety of others while ignoring their own well-being. if i couldn't have billy back, teaching el how to make friends at school, how to fit in even if you don't feel like you belong, suddenly finding himself with more little siblings than he knows what to do with, then the least they could have done was have her acknowledge that his sacrifice meant something. because it should have.

[themonopolyhat]

shoulder the sky au: helix whump

[ETA: this one-shot has become a round robin fic via the reblogs, but mind the tags folks!]

i have been dared by @shootingstarpilot to contribute to the helix whump “what-if” for his fantastic shoulder the sky series on ao3, so here we go.

pilot, you and i had the exact same idea on how to make helix’s life even worse than it already is -- namely, we both envisioned him on iwanaga along with obi-wan during dooku’s science project / torture spree.  this brainshare is hilarious all by itself.

(i should probably CONTENT WARN for torture, misery, and major character death right now haha)

my thoughts:

+ not sure whether dooku grabs helix on purpose or if it’s an accidental acquisition -- but since helix is along for the ride, and dooku is a bastard, dooku decides to make use of him.

+ therefore it is helix’s job to monitor vitals, update certain chart fields, and administer the antibiotics and pain meds while dooku’s minions or droids or whatever perform the experiments.

+ also because dooku is a bastard, helix has been outfitted with an explosive slave tracker right inside his skull. no escaping or even going where you’re not supposed to be on the base, pumpkin

+ so helix is in the fucking room with obi-wan when dooku questions him, and when dooku threatens him, and when the experiments begin. dooku threatens helix, too -- like shut up and do what you’re told or something real bad will happen.  obi-wan all but orders helix to comply because of course he doesn’t want anyone else to suffer on his behalf.  so helix shuts up and complies.

+ obi-wan is as quiet as he can be, quiet and straining at the restraints. it’s just another tuesday for helix, watching somebody he cares about fucking suffer while he’s unable to save them

+ helix loses his cool probably around the time that dooku proposes to drain obi-wan’s blood completely? or some other horrible thing, idk.  anyway helix responds as any horrified medic with his temperament might, and dooku has him knocked the fuck out.

+ helix wakes up in time to hear obi-wan screaming, and he gets to listen to the screams for a while before dooku wanders in like “oh yeah, if you’re not around to monitor obi-wan’s pain meds, i’m certainly not going to pick up the slack -- he’ll just suffer through the knives au naturel lol”

+ so helix goes back to work.  he gets obi-wan’s pain back under control, but of course he can’t do anything about the other sensations, or the sounds, or the smells, or the existential horror of being vivisected alive by your grandmaster who gave you tea

+ helix holds his hand, strokes his hair, tells him again and again: “look at me, look at me, don’t look down, obi-wan, you look at me”

+ they both quickly give up on apologizing for their mutual wracking sobs because they’re in this together, sweetheart

+ one night helix asks obi-wan how he can pray to the force and obi-wan (ever the teacher) haltingly talks about other force religions, the difference between praying and chanting for mindfulness, etc etc etc.  he quotes the guardians’ mantra: “i am one with the force, and the force is with me -- and i fear nothing, for all is as the force wills it.”  obi-wan seems to find it a little comforting (or maybe dissociative) to say it and hear it said, so helix bends over him and murmurs it over and over and over and over and over, even when obi-wan can’t speak the words himself. he can’t save his general but he can do this thing until his throat rips if need be

+ i don’t actually know whether sidious shows up, but if he does, he gives an Order via holo ahead of time and helix Goes Away for a little while. when he comes back to himself, obi-wan is blinded and deafened.

+ no help is coming. they can’t get out. dooku strips the skin from obi-wan’s hand and helix can only keep the meds at max, repeat the guardians’ mantra to his deaf ears, card a hand through his sweaty, grimy hair, hold his elbow, try so hard to be gentle so obi-wan knows it’s him

+ helix has had a particular intrusive thought since like day three, and he’s been shoving it aside because it’s unthinkable, but y’know, the unthinkable is becoming thinkable the longer he stays on as an accessory to the gruesome torture-murder of his general.  helix is a smart guy and figures out how to activate his explosive tracker at the time of his choosing.  useful information, under the right circumstances

+ around the time that dooku mentions breaking obi-wan’s spine for lols, helix decides he’s about had enough

+ no idea how he manages to get obi-wan alone in the lab, without dooku or droids or anybody else around, but:

+ the door is locked, the clock is ticking, they don’t have a lot of time before the window of opportunity will be lost.  helix undoes obi-wan’s restraints and climbs up on the table with him so he can prop him up in his arms and hold him close. he tucks obi-wan’s nose into his neck and rocks him for a few moments, whispering to him even though his general won’t hear, because he thinks obi-wan knows it’s him and he wants him to feel safe and loved

+ “see you soon, general,” he murmurs through his tears, and fuck, has he stopped crying even once in the past three weeks?

+ he activates the tracker

+ he saves his general

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 296: Ngl, This One Pissed Me Off

Previously on BnHA: Deku was all, “p.s. I actually activated yet another quirk several chapters ago when Kacchan got stabbed.” Compress was all, “[gets captured and passes out].” Spinner was all “[rifles through Tomura’s pockets and slaps a random Charbroiled Hand onto his friend’s unconscious face].” Tomura was all, “SOMEHOW THAT ACTUALLY WORKED” and woke up again, except it wasn’t really him, it was everyone’s favorite Final Villain, AFO. AFO was all, “time to escape finally” and summoned a bunch of Noumu and Absconded with Spinner and the DabiMarble in tow. Skeptic was all, “Horikoshi forgot I existed, but I’m actually Absconding in marble-form as well.” Deku was all, “ATTENTION WORLD, I WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THAT I OFFICIALLY WANT TO SAVE SHIGARAKI TOMURA.” And then the arc just sort of ended lol.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all, “but when you think about it, do we really need literally any female teachers at U.A. at all?” and for whatever reason doesn’t stop to wait for an answer. Midnight, who absolutely did not need to die, Dies, and I’m pissed about it. Ochako wanders the ruins of Jakku for what feels like hours, rescuing small children while her adult hero compatriots fall to pieces around her, because apparently the U.A. kids really are the only people who have their shit together. The citizens of Japan are all “damn that’s wild, wonder how fucked we are now,” but are actually super casual and chill about it which is oddly realistic. The chapter ends with AFO in Tartarus being all “lol time for the prison break arc,” without giving us so much as a chance to catch our breath, like holy shit. Are we on the clock or something now, goddamn.

lmao it’s like 7pm on a Sunday night and this is out already. this is like the worst possible timing lol. there goes my nice, relaxed evening. unless of course this turns out to be a nice, restful, soothing chapter, as chapters coming on the heels of traumatic, earth-shattering battles so often are. yeah, break out the Pina Colada song and the little drink umbrellas, I got a good feeling about this one

(ETA: I mean, I was obviously being sarcastic here but damn, Horikoshi.)

-- fff why did I laugh

it’s the crumbling city ruins in the background that really does it, I think. JUST LOOK AT THIS MESS THAT YOU HAVE MADE, EVERYONE. FOR SHAME

also, the title is dramatic af and I am so fucking excited you guys, like holy shit. BnHA’s In-Between arcs have always been my favorite part of the series, because it’s when all the character development and angst and/or catharsis happens. just, those little breathing spaces in between the action when everyone gathers to recuperate and compartmentalize their fresh new traumas lmao. bring on that angst!! but also, let’s please have some Comfort to offset all of this Hurt too, please and thanks

blah blah blah so the survivors were evacuated, good good, can you actually show us though?

AHHHHHHH

PIXIE BOB SURVIVED!!!! WASH IS STILL ALIVE LMAO HOW. THIRTEEN’S FACE, OMG SHOULD I LOOK AWAY. IS IT LIKE MANDALORIAN RULES. IDK HOW IT WORKS

HOW THE FUCK ARE THEY ALIVE. LOLS ANYWAY I’M HERE FOR IT. FEEL FREE NOT TO KILL ANYONE ELSE HERE HORIKOSHI, I THINK WE’RE GOOD

(ETA: it’s like talking to a brick wall.)

oh my god do we really need exposition about how the heroes tried to stop TomurAFO from escaping and OF COURSE failed completely because they suck lmao. oh my god I am shocked, that is such shocking news

wow they only managed to defeat three of the Noumus. holy shit. again, all of the Not-Kid Heroes are only slightly more useful than cardboard cutouts of heroes at this point, MORE AT ELEVEN

so Tomura may have lost the PLF, but he still more or less has an army then, huh. I really don’t know how anyone could expect a timeskip with that threat looming over everyone’s heads

oh nvm lol there are only seven Noumus left. wait so you’re telling me there were only ten Nearly High Ends in that last chapter?? felt more like fifty but whatever lol I’ll take your word for it

COMPRESS YAY YOU’RE ALIVE TOO

MAYBE THEY CAN EVEN REATTACH HIS ASS. I’M SERIOUS LOL, BECAUSE HE STILL HAS IT, DOESN’T HE? OR IF NOT, THEY CAN REBUILD HIM WITH A PROSTHETIC ASS. he’ll be more powerful than ever

WHAAAAAAT YEAH BOIIIII

WOOO, EDGESHOT, WOOOOO. THAT’S HIS WAY OF THE NINJA

YEAHHHHH SUCK IT, PLF

(ETA: for the record I don’t think Cementoss is dead here, just badly wounded. if he had died he would have been included in the forthcoming In Memoriam page along with the others.)

GET BENT LOL. TRUMPET I FOR REAL FORGOT YOU EVEN EXISTED. I NEVER WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU LOSERS AGAIN PLEASE. ONLY INTERESTING CHARACTERS MAY PROCEED PAST THIS POINT

dsflksaldkh;l

that’s... holy shit. that’s a bigass mansion, that’s what that is. also so does this mean there are still eighty thousand PLF members still at large, because that’s a plot line I very much do not care about in any way whatsoever lol. can’t we just retcon to say that Re-Destro was exaggerating? I mean hell, a CEO criminal pulling some Enron-type bullshit is pretty believable, isn’t it? those poor bamboozled shareholders

“makeste, here’s an idea, what if you scrolled down to read the rest of the page” lol gtfo of here with your logic and your sense

well those 132 people have made it onto my enemies list, but at least it sounds like they more or less took care of the rest. good riddance

and Toga escaped, as we knew already, and is now on the lam. hopefully she reunites with the League again at some point. although her doing her own thing could also be very interesting. idk what I want lol

anyway so there’s another big panel showing how fucked up the city is, just in case it hadn’t already been hammered into our skulls yet. there’s a car dangling off a roof somehow. how does that even happen. did Machia pick it up and put it there or

NOOO OMG RANDOM SMALL CHILDREN IN PERIL WHAT IS THIS

OCHAKO PLEASE SAVE THEM OMG

“if it falls on me, I want you to have my Endeavor pouch” OH MY STARS. HIS MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION. NO MY CHILD YOU CAN’T GIVE UP HOPE YET

LMAO

“FOR THE LAST TIME NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR DUSTY-ASS POUCH, KYLE” fffff these children are dying and I am cracking up so hard my eyes are tearing up what is wrong with me

YAY THEY SAVED THEM

but listen. not that I don’t love seeing the girls kick ass, because you know I do. but I also really, REALLY need to know what’s going down with the Musketeers, and I’m not looking forward to waiting three whole weeks for that so please Horikoshi. please hurry this along so we can get to them

goddamn it Tsuyu is saying she’ll take the boy to the shelter to get first aid, and I was all “okay great because that’s probably where Kacchan and the others are too”, but now someone else is shouting for help and Ochako’s all “I’ll go” and it’s like OKAY BUT PLEASE? this chapter is already more than half over omfg. ‘bout to start wringing some hands here

oh my god

is this Toga again??? WHAT THE HELL, THIS CREEPYASS HALF-DEAD DUDE BETTER BE LEADING UP TO SOMETHING INTERESTING, I AM REALLY GETTING IMPATIENT

OR, I GUESS, WE COULD DO THIS INSTEAD

“SO AS IT TURNS OUT, NOT EVERY CHARACTER WHO NEEDS HELP SAVING THEIR SPOUSE FROM FALLEN RUBBLE IS ACTUALLY TOGA IN DISGUISE” HUH, OKAY. DULY NOTED. FILED AWAY FOR FUTURE REFERENCE

but fucking... okay, look. I love Ochako, I do. but I like her a whole lot more when she’s interacting with other characters I actually care about, as opposed to running around in the rubble rescuing random people while the fate of my other children is still up in the air. like okay, I get it, shit’s bad, now if you don’t mind we really don’t have to spend all day here though

...anyways but nope, we’re still staying with her. she’s bouncing around rescuing all of these other people. omg. I literally have no patience here at all and it’s terrible, I know, but oh my god

omg finally something interesting is happening!!

look at that, an adult hero standing around being useless while the kids are busy getting shit done. why is this becoming a recurring theme

MY DUDE, THIS IS SERIOUSLY NOT THE TIME THOUGH

I GET THAT IT’S OVERWHELMING AND THAT YOU’RE TRAUMATIZED AND SHIT, BUT GUESS WHAT, SO IS EVERYONE ELSE. THAT’S WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR. JUST LOOK AT OCHAKO! SHE’S SO EXHAUSTED HER HAIR HAS EVEN LOST ITS FLOOF, AND YET SHE’S STILL OUT HERE DOING HER BEST. ONE SAVE AT A TIME MY MAN. GET IT DONE. LITERALLY A SMALL CHILD IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CALLING FOR THEIR MOMMY AND YOU’RE JUST STANDING THERE ALL “WAHH IT’S TOO MUCH” LIKE COULD YOU PLEASE POSTPONE YOUR CRISIS UNTIL AFTER YOU SAVE THEM PLEASE

OH MY GOD

MAYBE YOU SHOULD!! oh my god I really cannot, like wow. oh no I actually have to save people and do my job, god forbid. jesus christ, at least the other heroes tried. but Moping Hero: Bellyache here is just throwing in the towel and fuck everyone who still needs his help I guess. you are like the anti-Deku my dude

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO OH FUCK

THAT’S MIDNIGHT’S HAND OH FU -- SHE BETTER NOT -- HORIKOSHI I SWEAR TO GOD --

I’M GONNA LOSE IT I REALLY AM!!!!

HOLY SHIT HOW INTENSE OF A RAGE DO I NEED TO BRACE MYSELF TO BE FEELING HERE. THIS CHAPTER WAS ALREADY TRENDING TOWARDS DISAPPOINTMENT, DO WE REALLY NEED TO GO AND COMPOUND THAT

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

you’re telling me Tomura wasn’t brought back by that electric shock, but by his “fuck you” attitude? why are you explaining this to us now, again??

......

HEY, SO UM, FUCK ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS, THOUGH. (: OH MAN. OHHHHHH MAN. I HAVE... I HAVE GOT A LOT OF WORDS FOR THIS AND HERE ARE SOME OF THEM

FUCK

THINGS THAT SHOULD BE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO “SOME BULLSHIT”: THIS

FUCK

GET FUCKED HORIKOSHI

AND ALSO PLEASE FUCK RIGHT OFF!!

AND SERIOUSLY THOUGH FUCK YOU

NO BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH!! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED OFF ANYONE. LITERALLY ANY CHARACTER. YOU HAD TWELVE FEMALE PROS. TWELVE. YOU COULD HAVE MADE MORE OF THEM. PROBABLY, IF THERE ACTUALLY WERE SUPERHEROES IN REAL LIFE, THERE WOULD BE MORE THAN TWELVE OF THEM IN AN ENTIRE NATION. BUT NO, YOU WERE ALL “TWELVE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH.” AND THEN WHEN IT CAME TIME TO KILL PEOPLE OFF, YOU WERE ALL “WELL ALL RIGHT THEN, LET’S SEE, I PICK... THESE 18 RANDOM SIDE CHARACTERS WITH LITTLE TO NO DIALOGUE, PLUS THE ONE SINGLE FEMALE U.A. STAFF MEMBER WE ACTUALLY HAD. YEAH THAT OUGHTA DO IT”

AND BY THE WAY, HORIKOSHI, I PICKED SOMETHING UP FOR YOU ON MY WAY HOME, HERE IT IS, ┌П┐(・＿・) do you like it it was on sale. I saw it and was like, “Horikoshi would really like that.” so there you go. sorry it wasn’t gift-wrapped

p.s. I hope y’all can tell that that’s supposed to be a middle finger and not... something else lmao. er. anyway

(ETA: so I got a few asks from people who were really put off by this part of the reaction post, and so I’m just adding an extra note here to make it clear that I do not actually wish harm on Horikoshi in any way or even particularly dislike him. I wasn’t happy about Midnight’s death and I wanted to convey that, and so I went with my usual LOUD CAPSLOCK REACTION tone, but looking back on it I can see that it’s kind of a lot, lol. 

so just to be clear, the “fuck you” stuff is almost entirely tongue-in-cheek. that’s on me, I forget sometimes that there are people who share these sentiments unironically and so I didn’t think to make sure my intended meaning here was clear. anyways, killing Midnight was still a really problematic decision for numerous reasons but it is what it is. Horikoshi is not perfect, the story isn’t perfect, and I’m not gonna pretend like it is, but again just to be clear, I don’t harbor any actual ill will toward Horikoshi here.)

shit. and wow this man really went and killed off fucking Mystic too on top of that. have you ever seen a character fail so spectacularly at living up to their hype. r.i.p. Mystic you were like the Star Wars sequel of characters

(ETA: I have no fucking idea why I keep thinking Majestic’s name is Mystic lol. rest in peace you old scarecrowy bastard.)

and poor Momo, though. fuck. lost two mentors in a single day. and do not even get me started on Aizawa holy shit

so now we’re cutting to some random townspeople who are gossiping about the Todoroki drama. this is actually interesting in spite of my newfound determination to hate this chapter lol

ngl I am kind of heartened to see that not everyone fell for Dabi’s bs hook line and sinker though. Jeanist returning from the dead literally two seconds after Dabi was all “I SWEAR ON MY HONOR AS A VILLAIN THAT HAWKS MURDERED HIM” probably helped with that a bit! but there will doubtless be many other people who do believe him, or are at least still inclined to side-eye the heroes in general either way given how much they sucked in this arc. very, very interesting

so it seems though that even more than the whole Endeavor reveal, at the end of the day it’s going to be the heroes failing to live up to their end of the “put your faith in us and let us use our quirks and in return we’ll protect everyone and keep them safe” implied social contract that’s going to have the biggest impact on people’s opinions moving forward. basically this was always going to be a disaster no matter what

OH MY GOD FINALLY AHHHHH

Horikoshi really tapped into some of the real-life political energy of the past few years huh. Fuck Him Still for killing off Midnight, but I will admit that so far this is hella intriguing and I am really, really curious to see where things go from here

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE KIDS FROM THE BABYSITTING ARC

“FIVE PEEPEE MAN WOULDN’T LIE TO US” YES CHILDREN YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. at least the little ones still have faith

UM

 ( •̀ へ •́  )

that’s great. that’s really keen. all we need right now, amirite

GOOD FOR YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT

let’s just wait for him to explain what he feels. you know he likes to drag it out

is that Dabi crouched down there next to Spinner? looks like they got him out of the marble after all. but why has his hair changed colors again lol what

anyways. your turn to what??

:’) excuse me what

hahahaha are you fucking kidding me. and that’s where we’re going to end the chapter then. lol okay

so let’s recap. Midnight died. we spent ten hours watching Ochako dig people out of rubble for no apparent reason and were then introduced to my new least favorite character, and because Ochako is so nice she didn’t even punch him in the face even though she really should have. we did not get any Kacchan or Shouto. we got one panel of Deku, who is Finally Asleep. and the chapter ended with AFO ordering his Noumus to go set free, AND I QUOTE, HIS “MAIN BODY.” and now I gotta wait an entire week for Caleb’s translation to confirm that last part. omg

but it sounds like a prison break is imminent, which is very, very interesting. ...and actually, is it weird that I’m actually rooting for it to be a success? I have no idea what this guy is planning, but I do know that as long as the main part of his soul is still residing in Tomura’s body, Tomura’s chance of surviving the series is close to zero. and villain though he may be, I’m still rooting for his redemption (nice to have Deku on my side now too), and so yeah. so like if AFO feels like using some latent Exorcism Quirk or something that he’s been saving for just such an occasion, be my guest lol

meanwhile this doesn’t bode well for All Might though. or anyone else aside from Tomura, really. shiiiit

anyway. [slaps roof of chapter] this baby can fit so much bullshit in it

[mister-supernova]

This Isn’t Goodbye

Pairing: Hope Mikaelson x Reader

No one expected today to escalate the way it did. The Salvatore School had its fair share of chaos this entire year, and having a group of grown adults barge onto school grounds with guns and bark orders while treating supernatural kids like the scum of the Earth surprisingly wasn’t the worst thing that was going to happen to you today. 

Without the ability to access your powers, none of the students could defend themselves and there was no one else around to protect any of you. The members of the triad were ruthless and especially dangerous with their Malivore mud bullets that could poison any student who crossed the line. 

Unfortunately, you and Josie bit the end of one of those bullets. It wasn’t even supposed to hit you, but a shard managed to bounce off the floor and dig into your leg. 

At first, you didn’t know you were hit until you could feel your energy escaping you with every minute that passed. You thought that maybe you were just dehydrated, then you looked down and noticed the blood seeping through your jeans--your blood. 

Part of you didn’t know how you were able to stay on your feet while you, Hope, Lizzie, and Jo were forced to go into the werewolf holding cells in the basement. Lizzie was tending to Josie on one side of the cell on a cot while you and Hope were sat up against the wall on the other side of the room. 

“You’re going to be okay, Y/n. I swear. Once we find a way to figure out what’s blocking our magic, we’ll get that out of you as quickly as possible.” Hope says, her voice wavering ever so slightly. It made you smile, hearing the big, brave, tribrid worry for you. 

When you first met Hope, you weren’t sure that she had any interest in you once so ever. She was the mysterious, martyr-complex heroine trying to find her purpose in the world. She never let herself get too close to anyone because of her fear of losing them. 

Like MG, you were Dr. Saltzman’s student assistant when it came to taming the out of control werewolves of the school, so you saw Hope more often than the other students did. It was probably two years ago--about a year after meeting Hope--that you guys spoke more than three words to each other. 

You made yourself comfortable around Hope fairly quickly after becoming friends. She would never say that you two became friends so fast, but you believe otherwise. 

Unlike the many other students who tried befriending Hope and ended up backing down on her due to the fact that she was very stubborn, you never gave up on her.

Instead, you continued to be your usual goofball self around her. You’d tell her one terrible joke every day and even though she acted like she loathed it, she always looked forward to hearing them.  

Sometimes you would catch her sitting alone at one of the tables in the library either reading for one of your classes or studying for an exam. You’d pull up a chair and sit right beside her, nearly talking her ear off for half an hour while she pretended not to listen when really she was taking in every detail. You knew this because you’d notice her smile softly from behind her book. 

The two of you grew close, but you never expected yourself to develop feelings for Hope that were deeper than friendship. You believe they started when she let herself really smile and laugh at your dumb jokes. Something about the way her eyes crinkled when she was really happy made your heart grow three sizes. 

You’ve made it a point throughout your friendship to tease Hope anytime you saw her show concern for you and your friends.

“Is this the Hope Mikaelson worrying about someone?” Your voice was already starting to sound groggy and you could feel the poison spreading up your body at a painfully slow pace, “You sure you weren’t shot, too?” You ask, feeling her head with the back of your hand which she quickly removes with her own, “You’re cute when you’re worried, Mikaelson.” 

“I can’t believe you're making a joke of this right now.” She tells you, not letting go of your hand. 

“Sorry. Would you prefer that I act out the excruciating pain this Malivore bullet is making me feel, instead? I could also make a list of every body part that feels like it’s on fire if you have the time.” The serious look in her eyes only made you smile more. You never let your sense of humor falter, even in your possible last moments. 

“Why do you always do that?” Hope wonders with a half-hearted chuckle as she shakes her head at you.

“Do what? Be unbelievably hilarious even though I’m on my way to my impending doom?” You hush your voice as low as possible so that Lizzie and Josie couldn’t hear you from the other side of the cell. As much as you enjoyed making a joke of this situation, you weren’t sure the twins would feel the same way.

“You just smile and act like everything is okay. Like you aren’t in any pain.” 

You in fact were in the worst pain of your life, but the last thing you were going to do was let her see that. The infection of the bullet had made its way to your lower back at this point and it felt worse than any other sort of pain you’d ever felt prior to this moment. 

Seriously, you’d rather shift into your werewolf form for the rest of the day than feel this bullet destroying you from the inside out. 

“Well, maybe--let’s say this situation goes sour and we can’t figure out how to get the evil mud out of my body--I don’t want you to see me in absolute agony and I don’t want that to be the last thing you remember about me.” 

Hope squeezes your hand, not even wanting to imagine how you must be feeling right now. 

You squeeze hers back, “But I know with you here, I’ll be okay no matter what happens.” 

Tears began to fill the bottom of her eyelids, making the usual spark in her blue eyes--that you also started to fall for--go dull. Seeing her on the verge of crying caused your smile to fade. 

She had lost so many people she cared about because of her and she didn’t want you to be the next. The thought of that hadn’t crossed your mind until now. 

“Hope, it’s going to be okay.” You tell her with the most assurance you could. You knew that the chances of you surviving this weren’t certain, but the last thing you wanted to see was Hope cry. The sight of that would be more painful than the bullet.  

She nods silently before leaning her forehead against your shoulder and squeezing your hand with all the strength she could muster. You squeezed back, assuring her that you still had a good amount of your own strength left. 

Then you pressed a kiss to the top of Hope’s head, “I’m not going anywhere,” you whisper into her hair, “There isn’t anyone else I want listening to my stupid rants and laughing at my dumb jokes. Come to think of it, I don’t think anyone else would.”

A small chuckle manages to escape the tribrid and when she looks back up at you, you can’t tell if she thinks you're the biggest idiot in the world or the greatest person to exist. You decided to go with the second one judging by the faint smile she was giving you. 

It wasn’t until a few seconds passed that you realized how close her face was to yours. Her nose could practically touch yours if you were to slightly rotate your head to the right. 

Super hearing or not, you were sure that everyone in the cell could hear how fast your heart was beating right now and it wasn’t because of the Malivore bullet. 

You glanced down at her lips for less than a second and that was all you needed to do to know that you really wanted to kiss Hope Mikaelson. It wasn’t like you haven’t wanted to in the past, but in this moment you thought that this could be your last chance.

“Hope, I-”

The moment vanished at the sound of a familiar vampire running towards your cell--MG. Josie remained on the bed while you, Lizzie and Hope talked with him from behind the bars that he had now unlocked. 

After being caught up on how his mother is an agent working for Triad and that there’s a terrifying bloody skull sculpture in the school tunnels that’s blocking off the witches’ magic, you looked over at Hope. 

“Looks like that’s your cue,” she looks at you and Josie, who is looking a lot paler than earlier, “The school needs you and so does Landon. Go be a hero, Mikaelson.” 

Hope gives you one last awed smile before taking a confident step towards you and gently pulling your neck down to meet her lips with yours. To catch yourself from falling forward in surprise, your hands find her waist and you let out a content sigh. 

For a moment, the pain from the Malivore bullet was long forgotten and all you had to focus on was the beautiful woman in front of you. You couldn’t care less that Lizzie, Josie, and MG were witnessing your first kiss with the tribrid. In your mind, they weren’t even there. For all you knew, it was just you and Hope in the world.

The kiss didn’t last nearly as long as you wanted it to, but given that some of you were in a life or death situation, you thought maybe it was for the best. When Hope pulled away, she leaned her forehead against yours while her fingers still traced along the back of your neck. 

“Now, you really better come back.” You say breathlessly, feeling another smile grow on your face. 

“You better be here when I do,” she whispers with a hint of seriousness in her voice. 

“Will I get another one of those if I am?” 

She smiles, taking a small step away from you, “We’ll see.”

~

this is my first time posting an imagine like this, so i hope you guys like it ;) i’m making this a little mini series (idk how many parts yet) but part 2 will be coming very soon! 

[carryonmywaywardcaptain]

Imagine...being a demon and hunting Dean down

CarryOnCap’s Masterlist Dean Winchester Masterlist

Summary: When Dean says he knows you better than anybody, you’re surprised to find out that you may have more of a history with the Winchesters than you can remember...

Warnings: very slight Season 15 *SPOILERS* for like a paragraph; mentions of “need to kill”; slight angst and open-ish ending, but implied TFW 2.0 win

A/N: Written for @wayward-mikaelson​‘s #Daily Imagine Prompt and (unintentionally) for @winchester-reload​‘s #Suptober20 day 4 prompt “Brand” (even though I’m working on my actual entry sketches!)  Idk where this came from and it took a weird route. Also, there’s an unintentional...nod? paraphrasing maybe? of dialogue from CA: The Winter Soldier, so credit to the MCU writers for permanently snaking their way into my subconscious because my love for Steve and Bucky apparently knows no bounds.

“If it isn’t the notorious Dean Winchester,” you sneered. “As fun as this little game of cat and mouse has been, you Winchesters are really starting to piss me off.”

They’d been tailing you all across the country and you’d had enough. Sure, you were a demon, but it wasn’t like you set out to hurt anyone. As long as everyone else could mind their own business, you liked to think you were pretty easygoing. 

…aside from a few bloody slip ups here and there but, hey, who was counting?

At least you weren’t one of those crossroad douches in the soul collecting business. You preferred to spend your time topside, having fun and wreaking a little havoc now and again. It had been going just fine until those plaid-wearing pests became obsessed with you. Eventually you’d decided to hunt them down for a change so you could finally get a little peace.

You hadn’t spotted the tall, sasquatch Hunter yet, but you’d caught the green eyed one by surprise and knocked him to his knees. Glaring down at him with a smirk, you kept a firm hold on the pressure point of his shoulder to make sure he stayed right where you wanted him.

“Did the cat catch your tongue? Because, with all of our showdowns lately, I was expecting a little more of that quick wit you always seem to have stowed away.”

If you were being honest, he was a pretty fine piece of ass and you wouldn’t mind going a round or two with him under different circumstances. Even with the dopey look of intensity on his face, laced with...something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

Distress? Of course it would make sense for him to feel that way--you were a demon after all. Was there a hint of longing in the way he was staring at you? Maybe he couldn’t help thinking you were attractive despite what you were.

Who cares? You practically growled at yourself, chasing away something nagging in the back of your mind that told you there was more to his reaction. Pretending you didn’t actually care because you were incapable of such feelings anymore.

“D’you remember me?” he asked, eyes darting back and forth between yours.

Fuck, he was gorgeous. And it was really hard not to get caught up in his eyes. Why did that piss you off so much?

“Of course I do. You two meatheads have been on my ass everywhere across this godforsaken world,” you spat. “I know we’ve had a grand ol’ time and all, but listen up because I’m only going to say this once-- Leave. Me. Alone. If I catch you two on my tail again, I won’t be such a ray of fucking sunshine.”

He studied you for a long moment, seemingly unfazed by your threat.

“What do you remember about becoming a demon?”

You narrowed your eyes and tilted your head at his question. “What does that have to do with anything? And why the hell would it matter to you?”

“Because it does. Now I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess you don’t remember a whole lot about what happened to you. That there’s some gaps you just can’t seem to fill in.”

“And let me guess--you just happen to have all the answers to that because you know me so well?”

“I do. I know you better than anybody.”

You weren’t sure what game he was trying to play or how he could possibly know how disconcerting it was that you couldn’t recall a damn thing before the last month or two. Your life as a human, your time in hell-- you didn’t have the slightest idea who you were or what had happened to you.

But there was no way you were going to listen to some Winchester--even if your gut told you he was telling the truth.

“I highly doubt that,” you retorted, seething with defiance.

“You know me--”

“No I don’t,” you snarled, unsure why his words were making you feel so unsettled.

“Your name is Y/N L/N. You’ve known me and Sammy your whole life. You--ngh--”

He flinched and groaned in pain when you tightened your grip, digging your thumb into the hollow area just below the crook of his neck and above his collarbone. With your other hand, you withdrew a large blade from the side holster you’d crafted yourself.

“Sorry, sweetheart. I’ve had enough of the foreplay.”

Dean threw a sidelong glance at the weapon. His nostrils flared as he clenched his jaw and fixed his olive eyes on you again.

“I know you’ve been bouncing around looking for answers on that blade. Just like I know that underneath that jacket of yours you’ve got a mark on your arm. And I know from the small trail of bodies you’ve been leaving behind that you’re trying to fight that hunger you have to kill anything and everything around you.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Your voice quivered between your gritted teeth.

“It’s called the Mark of Cain. And that right there is the First Blade.” He nodded toward the weapon without a trace of deceit on his face. “I know the calm you feel when you’ve got the blade in your hand. And that power flowing through you? It scares the hell out of you.”

You grimaced, placing the antique blade against his throat as your chest began to heave from the growing rage pulsing through your veins. What gave him the right to pretend he knew a damn thing about you? 

Maybe he was right. Maybe you could admit the power did scare you sometimes. You didn’t exactly give a shit about right and wrong, but the overwhelming urge to kill left you feeling out of control. It was why you were trying to uncover answers about the brand on your arm. Why you were fighting a losing battle with the trembling hand gripping the blade now-- you wanted answers and you needed him to keep talking.

“How do you know all of this?” you demanded.

He swallowed uncomfortably and the blade bobbed against his Adam’s apple. “It was Chuck--uh, God. You’re a Hunter, Y/N. You, me, Sam, Cas, Jack--we’re family. Chuck’s trying to end the world and we were working to stop him. On our last run-in with him...we thought he killed you. But it turns out he sent you to some other universe he’d created. In this world I had the Mark and, when I died, I became a demon. In the other world he tossed you into, we think that’s what happened to you. ‘Bout a month or two ago, somehow you found your way back to this world and we’ve been trying to track you down ever since.”

Furrowing your brow, your eyes fell away from him as glimpses of the events he’d described flashed through your mind. You squeezed your eyes closed, trying to latch onto fragments of the hazy memories emerging from the depths of your subconscious...

Dean screaming your name, face contorted with horror. A small man with graying hair and a wicked grin snapping his fingers. Your hand gripping someone’s forearm, just as his strong hand grasped yours. The deep red energy that flowed from his arm to yours, searing through your veins until the Mark bubbled to the surface of your skin--the scar that was always itching to let the darkest parts of you reign free. 

“We can help, Y/N. Me and Sam can fix this.” Dean’s gruff voice was resolute as he briefly glanced away and begged you to consider his offer. “Just come with us and we can cure you.”

His words stirred something in your chest, making you realize he had triggered the faint prick of some long forgotten emotion. A small part of you longed to go with him, but it was miniscule and insignificant when you considered that “fixing this” might mean getting rid of the Mark. 

Despite the fear and lack of control it brought you, you were unwilling to give up the power or the blade. It was an addiction you had no intention of overcoming.

“Maybe I don’t want to be cured. The way I see it? There’s nothing to fix. Time to say goodnight, Dean-O.”

You raised the blade but, before you could strike, something cinched around your wrist. When the power coursing through you became dull, you turned in surprise to see that Sam had secured your wrist in one end of the cuffs he held. He reached for the blade with his free hand and swiftly dodged you when you lunged at him after releasing your hold on Dean. 

Snarling in rage, you again swung at Sam while he tried to wrestle the blade from your grasp. Dean suddenly collided with your back, circling his arms around you as he pinned your limbs to your sides. You thrashed your head and screamed as you tried to escape, but his cheek was pressed between your shoulder blades, tucked safely away from your efforts of fracturing his nose with the back of your skull.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he grunted, arms tense as he squeezed you tighter. “We’re gonna fix this. You’re okay, sweetheart.”

“Dean, I still...can’t...she’s too strong,” Sam grumbled.

You continued struggling while you gripped the blade with every bit of strength you had. As you fought the boys, you spotted a young man in a tan jacket walking toward you who had seemingly appeared out of nowhere. He looked vaguely familiar and you surged toward him out of instinct, knowing he was a greater threat than the men holding you.

His hair was side swept, with a few of the sandy colored strands grazing his forehead. His eyebrows were drawn together over soft eyes, brimming with an array of emotions. The boy raised his hand in greeting, smiling in relief as if he’d managed to find a long lost family member. 

“Hello, Y/N... We’re going to help you. I promise. Sam and Dean will find a way to fix this.”

“Do it, Jack!”

“Any time now, kid.”

The boys shouted in unison and you paused for a fraction of a second as another series of memories flooded you. Before you could make sense of them, Jack reached out and pressed two fingers to your forehead.

Your knees buckled and your eyes fluttered closed as you slipped into unconsciousness.

CarryOnCap Crew (Forevers):

@abswritesfandoms​  @amanda-teaches​  @cosicas-cuquis​  @crist1216​  @droidyouseek​  @emoryhemsworth​  @ericaprice2008​  @flawless-disaster​  @janeyboo​  @jenn0755​  @ksgeekgirl​  @maresmiley​  @memyselfandmaddox​  @notyourtypicalrose​  @randomparanoid​  @rynabarnesrogers​  @sandlee44​  @scarletsoldierrr​  @shann-the-artist-moon​  @sheerioasteroidpanda​  @shynara51​  @someday-when-you-leave-me​ @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​  @thisismysecrethappyplace​  @torntaltos​  @waywardbaby​  @waywardrose13​  @weebid​  @whimsicalrobots​  @wintersoldierbaby​  @wintersoldierissucharide  @yesfanficsaremylife​

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[whumpqin]

Day One - Anchor

Soooo I decided that I want to participate in the May 2020 whump challenge! I’m not planning on being able to finish this in time, but I do have an idea of where I want to go with all of this. Hopefully this counts...? This fic DOES include an anchor in it but the whump isn’t... surrounded by the anchor so idk fingers crossed!

Masterlist

General taglist: @spiffythespook (If you want to be tagged in my stuff or a specific story, just let me know!)

CW: Failed escape attempt, creepy/intimate whumper, gun involvement, drowning threat, broken fingers threat, alcohol use, noncon kiss on the cheek, maybe some other things I forgot to tag! Let me know if I have to tag something.

Word Count: 2,493

All is still and quiet, save for the sounds of the ocean waves rocking the boat back and forth in a continuous rhythm, waves crashing in the distance. Even the creaking of the boat itself was pleasant to the ears, moved against the ocean without need of worry or care. The ocean carried The Seeker like a dear friend, never once threatening to sink it below its depths. A kind of assurity that he could only dream of.

The only other noise besides the sound of the sea was the gentle sweeping of a broom against the deck, trying to rid the ship of what little dirt had made its way here. He tried to let himself focus onto cleaning as much as he could. That way, he didn’t have to think about anything else but the waves and where to sweep next.

For now, he was alone. The rest of the crew was down below in the underbelly of the ship, partying and singing whatever stupid songs they had come up with over the course of the voyage. It wasn’t often that they left him be and didn’t drag him to their celebrations over nothing, so he relished in the stillness they had left him in. He hoped that they would forget about him until morning..

Nereus paused in his cleaning and sighed heavily, as if trying to let the weight of everything flow off of his shoulders.

He cleaned his way up and down the ship, sweeping what he could off of the boat and into the dark waters below. By the time he had finished this end it was already dark, the light of the moon illuminating the deck in its cool glow. He couldn’t see in the dark like some other crew members or the Captain, so he was forced to squint against the little light that he was given. Nereus prayed that he didn’t slip and tumble over into the waters. Alone, there would be no one to find him. He wasn’t even sure if he could swim.

With a sigh Nereus wiped what little sweat he had on his brow away, lifting his head to see the silhouette of the ship as it rocked back and forth. His eyes caught sight of a dark, looming machine, round in nature with a large, hooked metal object on the end of a chain.

The anchor.

Because they were steadily going to the north, the anchor had been raised for as long as he could remember. Raising the anchor was a  big to-do with several crew members all working together to make sure the thing didn’t break off when they moved it. He knew it was probably one of the most important parts of the ship. After all, without it you’d have no way to properly stop the ship without it getting damaged in the process.

Nereus looked away quickly. He shouldn’t be thinking of that. It was hard to say what could happen to the ship, to the people, if he did such a thing. Everything might get ripped apart or worse!

In his attempt to divert his gaze, his eyes rested against one of the life rafts. Wooden with a couple of oars, small enough to fit on the side of the ship safely tucked away and pristine. Sometimes the crew would drop anchor and use it to catch fish to eat, when supplies were really running low. Nereus knew he could figure a way to untie it. If he’s really careful, he could let the anchor down and rush over to the boat and throw it into the water before anyone can get topside. He’d be gone before anyone could catch him.

It’s such a bad idea. He knew what happened the last time he tried to escape. But the whisper of freedom still called, beckoning him into the ocean. Nereus was desperate.

He dropped his broom where it was and made his way to the liferaft. First he needed to untie it and prepare for it to be in the water. It took him a moment longer than he’d liked, but soon everything was unfastened and the oars delicately placed inside the raft itself. Nereus shifted it so he could easily push it into the water, then stood up straight to look back at the anchor.

This is such a bad idea, his mind warned. Begging him to reconsider. But I have to try. If I don’t try then I’m just what he says that I am.

Nereus shrugged off his worries and embraced the idea of freedom. His feet carried him quickly to the anchor, stopping just in front of levers and buttons - things he never took the time to learn how to operate.

A rush of anticipation sped up his heart as he frantically tried to read anything that might tell him what the levers and buttons did. Just his luck, however, all of the words that may have once been there were no longer present, scratched off with time and use. Nereus cursed under his breath, glancing down to the cabin entrance.

The door opened, and his heart froze.

A Cambion, tall enough to have to bend forward to go through the frame, exited onto the deck. His skin was as blue as the sea, dark enough to look nearly black in the night air. Messy, nearly white hair was tousled and forced into a ponytail, strips of missed strands lying over his light blue eyes.

The Captain.

Nereus ducked for cover as The Captain’s gaze moved over to the liferaft, obviously noticing how it wasn’t secured like everything else should be. He hid behind the anchor, trying to still his breath enough to listen to the Captain’s boots thud against the deck of the ship. Nereus could hear him begin to hum a low tune, one of those dumb sea shanties to himself as he moved.

He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t been called. He wasn’t going to try and find out. Instead, he listened to which direction the sounds were coming from and slowly tried to shift away. Maybe if he swerved to the side he could still get away, still push the raft into the water before the Captain had a chance to grab onto him-

The sound of a gun clicked next to his head.

Nereus swallowed thickly, slowly moving his gaze to his right to stare down the barrel of a gun. He aimed his eyes higher, to look at the softly smiling face of the Captain as he watched. Nereus lifted his hands upwards, a sign of surrender. Tears almost immediately sprung to his eyes as the Captain took a step forward and placed the gun against his forehead.

“Thought you could sneak off in the middle of our celebration, did you?” When there was no answer, the Captain’s smile fell into a frown. “I left you with enough brains to speak, at the very least. Be honest with me and I won’t blow them out across the deck.”

“Y-yes…” he breathed, almost so quiet he could barely be heard above the waves. “I, I did.”

“Did what? What’s the magic words, boy?” The Captain lifted his thumb, cocking the hammer of the gun back to ready it to fire.

“Yes, yes Captain! I did Captain, I’m so sorry! I won’t do it again I promise, I won’t-”

The Captain raised the gun away from Nereus’ face and slammed it into the side of his head, sending him reeling against the ground. He whimpered, curling inwards to prevent any likely kicks against his ribs. He couldn’t do that again.

Above, the Captain grinned that fanged smile that struck fear into the hearts of the entire crew.

“I don’t need none of that babbling from you. Doesn’t work, from what I’ve seen.” He holstered his gun against his left pocket, taking care to put the safety on before doing so. “I know you’re not stupid, you’ll say anything to get someone off of your back, wont ya?”

Nereus didn’t say anything and only nodded, too afraid of what might happen if he accidentally started his “babbling” again.

“No, didn’t think so. Come on, I suppose a lesson’s in order, isn’t it? Gonna have to teach you humans the only way that seems to get through your thick fucking skulls, it seems.”

Hands snaked across his shoulders as the Captain leaned down, hooking fingers into Nereus’ collar and lifting him up with ease. He was so skinny now, it was hard to imagine anyone in the crew having trouble picking him up, let alone the Captain himself.

Nereus was flipped around, rough hands gripping onto the back of his shirt as he was marched to the side of the boat. He could see the waters much more clearly now, and it only filled him with fear as it got closer and closer. It was hard to say what the Captain was going to do with him, whether this might be his last night alive, eaten by whatever lurked in the dark waters or drowned because Nereus couldn’t get the hang of swimming in time, or if he was to be mercifully spared this time around.

He was pushed forward, nearly toppling over one of the metal bars. Suspended only by the Captain’s hand as he held him aloft. Hanging over the waters dangerously, but completely unable to save himself.

Nereus screamed.

“Captain! Please, please Captain I’m sorry! Please don’t drop me I don’t wanna drown, please!” he cried, arms reaching behind him to grab onto the Captain’s wrists.

“What? I thought you wanted to be out there in the open sea! Isn’t this what you wanted?” The Captain’s grip slipped just slightly, instead holding onto Nereus’ pants as he dangled further over the side of the ship.

“No! No, please! Captain I’m sorry! I don’t want to be in the water, please, Captain!” Nereus wasn’t sure if his begging was making sense, anymore. The primal terror in his bones screamed at him and every hair stood on end, proper words were hardly in his mind at the moment.

“That’s what I fucking thought.”

He was hoisted back up onto the deck of the ship and dropped into the floor. Nereus’ weak legs could barely hold his weight, and he collapsed against the floor sobbing. He curled up against himself, trying to protect the important areas even as fear coursed through his veins. There was no telling if the Captain would just leave his lesson at that, or if it would escalate into something worse.

Nereus whined as he was lifted into a sitting position, forced to face the gaze of the one who nearly threw him overboard. The Captain took his chin roughly and tilted his head to the side, inspecting where he had hit him.

“Ah, damn. Looks like that’s gonna bruise. Sorry about that, Roo. Wouldn’t have had to do that if you weren’t stupid enough to try and leave.” The Captain heaved a small sigh, watching Nereus cry into his hands for a moment. He could smell the tinge of alcohol on his breath. “You do realize that you’d likely get yourself killed if you tried to leave on your own, right? No food, no water, no idea where you’re supposed to be going? Why the fuck would you waste time trying to squander the one gift I’ve given you, huh? Look at me.”

Nereus forced his blurry eyes back up to the Captain, who smiled in return.

“There’s my trophy. Now, repeat this back to me. ‘I’m not going to try and escape ever again.’ Go on. Say it.”

He swallowed. “I-I won’t try to escape ever again, Captain,” Nereus murmured softly, voice gravely and cracking.

“Again. This time with feeling.”

“I won’t try to escape ever again, Captain.” It was stronger, with less breaks. Like a passionate opinion said amidst frustrated tears. 

“Good. Now,” the Captain murmured, leaning close to whisper in his ear, a hot breath making him shudder at the feeling. “If you ever try to escape again, Roo, it’ll be your last time. You understand me?” Nereus nodded quickly, terror latching onto his vocal cords and refusing to let go of them. “Good. And if you ever touch that raft again without someone telling you to, I’ll break all of your fingers one. By. One. Just to make sure you’ve gotten the picture. Got it?”

“Ye-yes, Captain. I understand, Captain,” Nereus finally blurted out, voice quaking and hardly any strength put behind it.

“Alright. Now you have two options, because you obviously can’t be trusted by yourself. You can go below deck and help pick up after my crewmen, or you can come up to my room and stay with me. You choose, Roo.” His voice was poisonous, the air of a threat that hung over him like a weighted cloak. It was hard to speak with the Captain’s hiss in his ear, let alone think.

Nereus weighed his options carefully. If he went to clean up after the crewmen, they might be drunk enough to leave him be for the night. He might be able to get a full night’s rest, curled into the safest corner that he could find. Though, the chance that they might be fully aware of him and might try to play mean tricks was always an option, too… But, if he went with the Captain, it was hard to tell what might happen to him. He was at the very least drunk, and the fact that Nereus might have pissed him off made him so very scared of what might happen behind closed doors.

The lesser of two evils was, like always, still evil. But Nereus was going to need plenty of energy to work tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that. If he wanted to survive, whatever would hurt him the least had to be the better option. 

“I’ll clean up after the crew, Captain,” he finally said, after he had managed to gather enough courage for it.

The Captain breathed a deep sigh, and Nereus wasn’t sure if he had made the right decision or not. He felt the gentle press of lips against his bruising cheek, before the Captain pulled away to stare him down with cold eyes.

“Skitter on down to the underbelly, then. I’m sure you know your way around by now. Don’t get any other… ideas, you understand me?” The Captain’s voice had turned to ice, and Nereus certainly wondered if there was a right and wrong choice. 

But he nodded like he was supposed to. You never disobey the Captain. 

Nereus forced himself to his feet and dusted himself off, before running to the door that led into the lower cabin of the ship, holding back king-sized tears and praying that none of the crewmembers asked him about the new bruise against his cheek.

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

20, 27, 35, 40, 50, 59, 67, 88 for All Eight Characters (one each but if you wanna go Hog Fucking Wild feel free)

Alright so. I’m not going hog wild but! I decided to do two guys per question, one who was my first gut instinct for that question, and then one random character to spice things up! Do some character building in a direction I might not have thought to go, you know? 

Also bro this got so long so just. Putting it. Under a read more because I do respect your time and dashboard.

20. How would your character define love? Caspian: Love is when people stop to listen to you. When they smile when they see you, and sneak you an extra dessert when no one is looking. Love is being willing to bend the rules to make you happy, teaching you to hold your head up high even when you’re getting in trouble, and telling you to always look the world right in the eye when it wants you to back down. Love is giving up whatever you have to without a second thought for the other person’s sake, and knowing they would do the same for you. Love is taking the lessons they taught you, carrying them in your heart, swallowing your fear and setting out to bring them home. Ryker: Love is fleeting, and fickle, and fragile. Love is at best a luxury and more realistically a bargaining chip. It’s real, sure, but its primary use is to blind people to what’s hidden behind it. Some people may get lucky, but only a fool would bet on those odds. ...if you are lucky enough to find it, though, hold on tight. Real love, genuine, honest, reciprocated love, is worth doing anything for. The people you care about should know how you feel by what you do, not by what you say. Show love with discretion, but show it fiercely. 

27. How much have they given up to get to where they are in life, willingly or unwillingly? How much do they think they would give up to get to where they want to be, in the future? Raini: Raini I think is super interesting because I think she’s given up a fair bit, and she’s completely fine with the sacrifices she did make because she decided the benefits outweighed whatever she had to give up to get it. But on the other hand, giving something up unwillingly? Having something taken from her? Absolutely a cause for retribution at any cost. idk if I’m explaining the difference in a way that makes sense, but that distinction means the world to Raini because, even if the sacrifice is hard to swallow, at least she was in control of it. And like, the whole premise of the campaign is giving up shit! Giving up everything! And was it willing at the time? Yes! But coming out on the other side of it and not remembering making the decision and, quite frankly, not agreeing with the decision you made is rough! You’re yourself, you know because you’re you, but you’re also not yourself because that’s the whole point of what you did, so did you really do this? Was it someone else in a body you now inhabit? What happens to this new you when you regain your old memories, because there’s no way in hell you don’t at least try to get them back? It’s a lot to think about!! And that, and the core of this question, is why Raini doesn’t let this end without a Wish to restore the memory of whoever wants it. I don’t think she sees erasing them the first time as a decision “she” necessarily made -although whether that’s a philosophical issue or one of diverting guilt is open for debate- so she wants to reclaim what she sees as having been taken from her unwillingly. Pip: Tbh, the plot and premise of Strahd aside, Pip has lived a pretty charmed life. He fucked up plenty, but he always seemed to manage to stumble his way into where he needed to be when he needed to be there. Honestly, even within the module things didn’t go too badly for him! He lost a good friend at one point, and nearly died in that same fight, but other than that he fared pretty well. The biggest thing he’s given up in his life was his place in his home village, but honestly it’s like 50/50 on whether that was willingly or unwillingly. Like, he feels bad about the accidental arson? But also. It kinda kicks ass that he did then just like. Leave and it was fine. With his campaign over, I don’t really have much in the way of future goals for him! He’s just. He’s just fucking vibing. You know? So! Seems like he’s getting out of giving up anything in the future.

35. What is their most prized possession? If they have one that is. Ryker: For sure have talked about this before: it’s his hammers. He has two enormous hammers that he fights with, named Last Chance and Misery’s End. They’re sturdy orc made weapons with their names hammered into the side of each head in orc, that have been passed down from clan leader to clan leader for generations. They hit well, they don’t do much else, but when you’re regularly shattering knees, ribs, and skulls, what else do you need them to do? They’re sturdy, practical weapons. Reliable, and they remind him of home. He’s more comfortable putting his life in their hands than anything -or anyone- else’s. Brilliance: Her armor! For several reasons: 1. She paid extra to have it enchanted so that it repels dirt and blood and grime. After crawling through cult sewers to clear out some nasty boys, Brilliance decided that never again was she going to spend her short rest having to wipe blood or shit off her nice armor. When she upgraded to splint mail, she absolutely forked out that Armor of Gleaming enchantment. 2. Her shield specifically was decorated by her fiancee! Sienna likes to paint, and when Brilliance first got her shield for guard duty at the church Sienna took it upon herself to get out her paints and paint on a wreaths of vines and roses and birds and other lovely things, so that her love could always have a piece of her with her 💖

40. Do people expect a lot from your character or look up to them for something? Why or why not? Ayen: Unfortunately, Ayen is baybe. And even though she hasn’t outright told anyone how old she is, it’s becoming rapidly apparent that. Hey? They might have figured it out. It’s literally inconceivable how they could have pieced it together though?? I mean, how does anything about her not read as completely mature and put together elf woman thank you I’m an elf??  So, no. I don’t think anyone looks up to her. And that’s okay!! Yes she is a young adult with her own set of skills and her own value to add to the world and the people around her, but she would not thrive in a position of leadership like she thinks she would. She needs time to mellow out and settle down, and to learn how to make decisions quickly and responsibly. I think, one day, she’ll be able to show a lot of people how to do a lot of good. For now, though, she’s happy trotting along after Dad and rowing her and her new friend around in circles in a row boat, just because it’s fun to mess around sometimes. Auriga: Interesting question! Interesting question. I think in the collective sense, as part of the Court of Stars, definitely yes. They’re the rulers! They guide their people through the knowledge and wisdom accumulated over the course of millennia! I think Auriga specifically even is seen as having a closer connection to this wealth of knowledge, being a cleric and all. But I am toying with the thought that outside of the context of the council and the court, the people that make it up don’t have as much weight? There’s still respect of course! But while one star shining on its own is all well and good, without the context of those around it how are you meant to learn from what it has to say to you? Auriga understands this, it’s just part of their culture, and he’s in no way troubled by it. It’s the way things are meant to be, and so they will continue to be until it is clear that something needs to change! 

50. What’s their earliest memory? Auriga: Now full warning this is going to be a lot less detailed than Cog’s is just because I know him less, but I think Auriga earliest memory is something sweet and warm like. Sitting in one of his older sibling’s laps (while he’s the Baby of the family!) and just. Dozing against their chest while the rest of them sit in front of a roaring fire and just talk. He doesn’t remember a word of what was said, he just remembers being little and held and loved. Their family mostly interacts in the council room, I think, because when things get busy with ruling it’s so easy to just fall into work and let family time fall by the wayside. But when things get stressful, when he realizes he hasn’t interacted with his brothers or sisters outside their meetings in a while, I think this is one of the memories that comes to mind and encourages him to set aside whatever he’s reading and go off to be intentional about spending time with his brothers and sisters :) Cog: One of her earliest memories was when her magic first manifested! She was maybe six or seven, and Mama was busy at church and Daddy had gone out to check on some of the folks that lived a bit further out from town, and baby Cog was bored to tears. She knew she wasn’t supposed to leave home alone!! But there were some Cool Older Kids she wanted to impress, and they were going to sneak out and explore the swamp. They were big kids! They were like thirteen! Surely, nothing bad could happen if there were big kids with her! So she followed them out of town, and by the time they noticed their tag-along it would have been Way too much work to take her back home. Whatever. It’s fine. They start poking around the edge of the swamp, looking at weird fish and bugs and poking at mushrooms or whatever kind of shit grows in swamps. Probably getting eaten alive by mosquitos.  Well! Cog is having a grand old time playing with frogs and cattails, and she’d wandered off from the teenagers she was supposed to be staying with. She was up to her calves in the brackish water trying to recapture a frog that escaped her when she looked up to see a long, thin shape darting through the water straight for her. It was a cottonmouth, mutated by the Wasteland and nearly as big as she is. It hissed as it closed the distance between them, mouth open wide as it readied itself to lunge and sink its fangs into her. Cog screamed and threw her arms up to protect herself-  And then there was a burn of something wild and unfamiliar in her chest, a warm hand on her shoulder, and a flash of light so blinding that people swore later they could see it from town. Cog stood there for a moment, frozen and trembling, but when she gathered the courage to open her eyes everything within five feet of her was scorched clean, and the corpse of the snake that had charged her was bobbing, almost completely unrecognizable, in the water in front of her. Mama was furious with her when they made it back home, of course, but after hearing what happened? After hearing that Cog had finally managed to channel a spell, some rudimentary form of Word of Radiance? Well, there were much, much more pressing things to worry about, all of a sudden.

59. Have they ever had an encounter with someone that changed their whole life? Cog: HA Morgan opened up a can of “Talk About Ace” SOUP and folks it’s fucking lunchtime. Drink up assholes!!! I know I’ve talked about this a hundred times but I’ll never be sick of it: they’re JUST such good friends and they’ve been so so good for each other. Before they met, Cog was in a place in her life where she felt trapped and perpetually anxious, and Ace was restless and angry at the world. Neither of them felt like they could measure up to the expectations other people had for them, and Cog had turned that worry self-destructively inward while Ace had turned it outward. Ace’s straining at his leash brought him to Lafaroh, and Cog’s -at the time, Charlotte’s- soft heart had her defying direct orders to slip up to this stranger and warn him that he needed to leave before he got hurt. And Ace looked at Charlotte, at the genuine worry on her face for someone she’d only just met. And he looked at the town around them, at the way the people who passed by looked at him and how that look shifted from suspicion to shock and outrage when they saw Charlotte with him. And he did some math, and he realized whatever the hell was going on in this podunk town was a thousand times more interesting than anything that would ever happen back in New Alexandria proper. So of course, he settles in to pry. Charlotte, bless her, has many, many strengths; reading into people’s intent is not one of them. So when Ace starts asking questions, she’s happy to answer to impress upon him how important it is that he goes home! And the more she talks, the easier it is to just... keep talking? This man, this stranger from the Academy, is talking to her, listening to her like nobody ever has. And more than that, he actually seems to care! He has no reason to care that she’s worried she won’t be able to step up the way she knows her mom wants her to, but he’s clearly concerned and invested in her story. And even though she’s trying to keep things vague, she’s never been very good at deceiving people. Pieces start to fall in place, Charlotte lets more slip than she means to, and by the time they’ve been talking for an hour or so Ace has a pretty good picture of what’s going on here. It’s not safe here, not for him and certainly not for her, so he doesn’t even stop to consider whether it’s an offer he can make when he holds out his hand, both literally and figuratively, and tells her he can take her back to the Academy with him. And to Charlotte, who less than an hour ago had been weighing her odds of surviving the Wasteland alone if she ran away on her own, the door this man just opened to her? The way he’s reaching back through it to offer her a hand, to pull her through to a better, safer life? How can she say no?  They fought their way out of Lafaroh that day. Charlotte almost certainly wanted to try to slip out unnoticed, but they’d already attracted too much attention by letting townspeople see them talking. Charlotte goes home to quickly pack, and she doesn’t come back out of the house. Ace waits, and the sun starts to set, and she still hasn’t come back out. Something isn’t right. He knocks on the door: there’s no answer. He knocks again, louder. Then again. Finally, an angry looking man opens the door and starts to tell Ace to get lost, but there’s clear sounds of arguing inside coming from just out of view of the doorway. The man is big, but Ace is fast enough to duck inside and around the corner in time to see Charlotte struggling to get around a woman who looks strikingly like her in order to make a break down the stairs and toward the door. The next several seconds are messy and disjointed; no one expects someone in high level caster robes to take the staff off their back and start attacking with it, but the next thing Charlotte knows Ace has her hastily packed bag slung over one shoulder, has planted her firmly behind himself, and is holding her hand with one of his own while he levels his staff at her parents with the other. His voice is calm but hard as he explains that they’re leaving, because Charlotte made it clear that she isn’t safe or happy here. If they try to stop them, Ace can and will bring the full force of New Alexandria’s wrath down on their tiny, shitty town. He’s going to take Charlotte away, find her a place in the Academy, and they’re not going to say a word. And so they leave! With all of Lafaroh absolutely seething behind them, with Charlotte gripping Ace’s hand as tight as she can and willing her own not to shake, they set out together into the Wasteland and, ultimately, to New Alexandria.  I have Such a vivid mental image of the two of them camping out in the Wasteland the night before they made it back to New Alexandria, with the lights of the city just peeking over the horizon in front of them. They’re eating dinner over a fire Ace made Such a show of lighting with magic instead of the tinderbox one of them definitely had, and they’re talking about names Charlotte could use in New Alexandria because she’d quietly admitted earlier that day that the name “Charlotte” has so much baggage that she doesn’t want to carry anymore. And Ace, while he is trying to help, is also a dork. He’s throwing out every name that pops into his head, good or not, trying to see if he can get her to laugh at one of them. They spend a few minutes talking, Ace muses aloud over “Charlotte Olivia Grace” a few times, looking for some cute nickname he can pull out of a name like that. And then he pauses, and sits up, and looks at Charlotte, and nods. The suggestion that she go by “Cog” makes her laugh, but that’s a good thing. Ace is grinning too because some dumb shit he said finally got a smile of out Charlotte for the first time since they left her shithole town. She’s sort of laughing in spite of herself, and it eases some of the heaviness that’s been hanging over them the last few days, but after considering it for a moment? She loves it. Taking the name she was given, and making it her own in a way she knows her parents would hate? It feels good! She’s grinning ear to ear when she turns to Ace and nods in agreement. “Cog” it is. “Charlotte” dies in the Wasteland that night; Cog enrolls in the Academy the next day. In Cog’s eyes, Ace’s intervention literally saved her life. She went from being a scared little girl in the middle of nowhere with no future beyond the ramshackle walls of her small town, to an incredibly promising up and coming student of the Academy. She went from being told that the only use her magic had was what it could do for the Church, to blowing away professors who expected her to barely be able to manage a cantrip and being praised for her intuitive understanding of magic. And for Ace! Cog was the first person his actions truly, directly helped. He saw a problem, he stepped in, he fixed in. In a slow moving, insular city like New Alexandria, that wasn’t something he’d been able to do before. He saw how the good he’d done in helping Cog reflected and redoubled in the way she treated the people around her, and saw her making the choice to be kind not in spite of but because of everything she’d been through growing up. Bro like Ace’s character bio says “self-appointed big bro to Cog” and “he sent a letter to Cog thanking her for being a positive influence in his life”. This question got SO out of control as I wrote my Cog and Ace fanfic but! They deserve it! AND the party is going back to New Alexandria next session, so!! More Ace content soon folks stay tuned! Raini: Did you think I ran out of soup?? Did you think lunchtime was over? FUCK you! This is MY blog and I’ll wax poetic about my dnd characters and their friendships for as LONG as I want to! And there’s nothing you can do to stop me!!!!! Now this one in fairness probably won’t be as long as Cog’s was, just because I know that all the people who follow me are like. Actively in the campaign and various group chats where we discuss how important our characters are to each other. But do NOT make the mistake of assuming it’s because I love you any less. I love you so much. Yes homo. Where do we start? At the beginning, with our lizard. Y’all ever uh. Y’all ever met a dipshit lizard who you’re pretty sure you can trick into taking you adventuring but plan to ditch the second they become deadweight (i.e. whenever they go down for the first time, probably), except then you became like best friends and siblings by all but blood and you realize you’d rip the world in half for them without them even asking and you can’t even begin to imagine how you’d reconcile the hole they’d leave in your life if they left it? Have you ever slowly realized that you’re adding “except for him” at the end of every generally grumpy statement you make about the world? And then realized even more slowly after years of friendship that somehow the bastard managed to extend “except for him” to “except for them”, and you’re so much less disengaged from and disinterested in the world around you? Y’all ever had that happen to you?? Shit’s wild. And then. Y’all ever met a fucking cop who clearly has, like. An actual metric ton of baggage she’s refusing to even glance in the direction of? And at first, it’s a pain to have to circumvent her “morals” in order to get shit done. Honestly, it’s kind of always a pain. But even your crotchety ass has to admit there’s something about sticking so firmly to your guns regardless of the situation you’re put in that’s admirable, that the world would be a much better place if more people had that same iron will and a refusal to be moved. Even if they’re standing up for stupid shit, at least they’re standing up for something. And maybe you take some of that resolve and tuck it away in your chest, to give you something to grip onto when you need to dig in your heels and refuse to let the world knock you around. And then. Y’all ever met a druid who burns with an anger you, honestly, kind of understand? Who wants to be more than the world wants her to be so badly, in a way that you definitely understand? Have you ever gotten to watch over the course of weeks and months as she time and again made the choice to take that anger and that drive and point it at things that would hurt the people she cares about? By god, she’s leaving her mark on the world, and she’s doing that by burning the shit out of it. But, without fail, there’s always a circle of uncharred, untouched ground around each and every party member. And when you notice this pattern, you can’t stop yourself from noticing it again, and again. And you learn: sometimes, you’re angry at the world. Sometimes! You’re angry at your party members! But that anger points outward. Always, and unequivocally. You have your friends’ backs, even if you’re furious with them. And then you meet a fish and you learn that sometimes things just need to be hit a lot of time in a row, really hard, with a big fucking hammer.  Okay but you meet this fish who, somehow, despite being monotone and weird and a fish and clearly an outsider to like. Land culture? Which you guess is a thing, apparently. Despite all of that, they have an emotional intelligence that’s off the fucking charts. And quite frankly! For a long time, it makes you really, really uncomfortable! If you don’t tell somebody how you’re feeling, and you don’t, then they shouldn’t be able to figure it out. But, slowly, you start to see the value of it. Your lizard is upset about something, and they won’t tell you what, but you’re able to squint at them and slowly figure it out so you can fix it. A few days later a joke a party member makes rubs you the wrong way, and you swallow your pride enough to admit it and they just. Apologize? Just like that? They promise not to say it again? And fish expressions are so hard to read, but you can just Tell that they’re over there looking smug, the bastard. But while you’re definitely not ready to commit to this being a daily thing you can, begrudgingly, admit that you can see the benefits of “communicating” with the people around you. 

67. What was the most acidic remark your character’s ever given to someone? And their reaction? Brilliance: In like our third session, our warlock had disguised himself as a “beautiful woman” in order to flirt with the guy we were there to talk to to get information out of him (Note: They did not ask Brilliance, at any point, if she was willing to flirt with him instead. She would not have been, but they could have at least asked). So Brilliance was hanging out at the bar near this dude’s private booth while the warlock chatted him up, and when the warlock got up to leave the dude reached out to try and grab her arm. He missed, but Brilliance was on his ass in a second with her sword out like “If you had grabbed her hand, you would have lost your own. She’s not interested in you; let her leave.” He thought it was funny and kept calling Brilliance “sweetheart”, but I did get to put my sword through his gut before the end of the night SO. Who’s the real winner? Ayen: I rolled Ayen for this one and I want to respect that and not cop out, but I don’t think it’s super in her nature to snark at people. She’s just gonna tell you like straight up that you’re a dickhead, and that’s that. I think the only time we might get to snarking is if someone (Dad, a party member, etc.) said “leave it alone” and Ayen is Not Done. She might send some parting shots over her shoulder then, like a “You’re lucky I like this guy so much, or we wouldn’t be done here” or “Show your face again when my dad’s not around, if you’ve got the balls.”

88. Assuming they aren’t one already would your character prefer to be a Vampire, a Werewolf, or a Demon? Pip: Potentially a cop out! However. A little..... vampire frog? Hello Mr. Strahd. Are we friends now? Could be a vampire! We have seen that vampires are cool and hot and powerful if perhaps a little amoral but that’s okay, because they’re cool and powerful.  Caspian: I literally spent fucking forever looking at this because. She literally worships and derives her Sun Soul monk shit from Pelor, the god of the sun. So like! How the fuck you gonna be a vampire or a werewolf with that going on. Dude hates the undead too, so vampire struck out twice. Demon’s iffy too, because it very much goes against the whole “good aligned” thing she has going on. So I guess?? Werewolf is the least offensive?? She’ll just pray and hope Pelor is like. Cool. With it. Haha? Also objectively, a werewolf that worships the god of the sun is VERY funny so there is that.

[generallynerdy]

Mom & Dad (Steve Rogers X Reader)

Summary: Steve Rogers is not the only mother hen the Avengers ignore. He’s only the Dad of their makeshift family. Mom is much, much more stubborn than he is.

Requested by Anon: Could you do a Steve Rogers/superhero!reader where they meet in the middle of a battle and go their separate ways but they keep ending up in the same battles and one day Steve finds she's not there and starts to worry, finding her bleeding/some kind of really bad injury in an alley and she's unconscious, so he takes her back to the compound/tower and watches over her in the hospital and maybe when she wakes up they kiss or something. Thanks!!

Requested by Anon: Hi! I thought a Steve Rogers/reader with prompts 355 and 342 would be fun, maybe Reader works for shield, or is a first responder, maybe they're even an avenger? Idk whatever you want :) Thanks!

Prompts: 342: “It’s not okay for you to run around and threaten to kill everyone.”

“Oh, but you never told me that so how should I know?”

    355: “Don’t look at me, this is not my fault.”

The prompts are bolded in the text.

Key: (Y/N) - your name, (L/N) - last name

Warnings: Violence, mentions of explosives, head injuries, mentions of amnesia Word Count: 1,569

Note: so the reader is a shield agent like the second request instead of the first cuz i think it works better. Hope you don’t mind me melding two requests! two fics today cuz i wanna post my 300th post tomorrow at the same time of my AO3 100th chapter yeet

Steve Rogers was getting used to having (Y/N) (L/N) around. It was almost a rare thing for her not to be involved in their battles. No matter where in the world the Avengers went, she almost always appeared. After finding out she worked for SHIELD, it was a little easier to believe, but it was still ridiculously coincidental that they would send the same agent every time. Steve was starting to get suspicious.

When the Avengers first noticed her kicking ass in one of their scrimmages with leftover HYDRA agents, they could have sworn she was a civilian. They were quickly corrected when Steve tried to help her evacuate.

“I appreciate the help, Captain,” she hissed through her teeth as she roundhouse kicked someone. “But I’ve got it handled.”

She whipped out a SHIELD-issued handgun and brought down two others, leaving the Captain with wide eyes. With a big grin and a slight silly bow, she sprinted away, disappearing into the battlefield.

“Cap, your civilian is running the wrong way,” said Tony over the comms.

Steve shook his head. “She’s not a civilian. SHIELD sent a babysitter,” he sighed, rushing off.

After that, she never stopped showing up. It took them awhile to figure out her name, but once they did, she was practically family. Well, extended family.

They couldn’t help notice that she could be aggressive sometimes. She never approved of their plans, except maybe Steve’s. He was perhaps the only one with an actual plan of attack, while the others improvised.

Somehow (Y/N) had managed to get access to their comm channel and took that advantage to heart, chiding them every three seconds. Her frustration was easily translated, but only a few of them listened to her warnings. This resulted in more frustration and quietly hissed threats over the comms.

One day, she let out a particular nasty shout.

“Tony, you fucker! I’ll kill you!”

Steve stopped in his tracks, standing right behind her in a quickly falling flurry of HYDRA grunts. “It’s not okay for you to run around and threaten to kill everyone.”

She sent him a glare before shrugging. “Oh, well, you didn’t tell me that, so how should I know?”

Steve rolled his eyes and was soon separated from her, but couldn’t help laughing to himself. She was almost like a reluctant mother hen. He couldn’t help but admire her ability to put up with the team without begging for a transfer. Even he would’ve given up by now, he thought.

“Focus, Cap!” She barked at him as a HYDRA agent snuck up on him.

He snapped back into it at the last minute to bring the man down before nodding at (Y/N), who rolled her eyes back. That just made him smile a little. He knew she really did care, even if she tried to play it off.

“We’ve got a bogey entering the southeast building,” Sam said.

At his voice, both Steve and (Y/N) stopped, listening intently. The former pressed a finger to his earpiece to make sure he heard the man’s words clearly.

“Is he carrying anything?” Nat’s shout sounded from down the street and in their ears. “What’s the target?”

“Looks like he’s headed for the 5th floor. Can’t tell but I think I see wires--”

Before Sam even finished his sentence, dust flew up from the main street in front of Steve and (Y/N) sprinted by. Her boots kicked up dirt as she went, blinding Steve for a second, but she wasn’t stopped by her own mess.

“I’ve got it!” She huffed as she passed by him, disappearing into the building.

When Steve realised what she had said, he turned on his heel and ran after her. “(Y/N), wait--!”

He passed Natasha on the street and stopped for a brief moment, sighing at her for not attempting to stop the agent.

She shrugged. “Don’t look at me. This isn’t my fault.” She raised her eyebrows at him pointedly.

Steve mostly ignored her and made his way to the southeast building, taking down agents as he went. There weren’t many left and they were spread farther out, so entering the building wasn’t too hard. Odd as it was, he didn’t spot any sign of (Y/N) or the bogey she was chasing. Doing a quick survey of the room, he spotted the back door wide open.

“Back door is open,” he said to the rest of the team. “I’m gonna check it out. Sam, go in from the roof. Make sure he didn’t go up.”

“Got it.”

Steve halted by the back door before swinging into the alleyway, shield raised. When no gunshots sounded, he peeked out and glanced around. Behind him, he heard a quiet groaning.

When he turned, he spotted two figures on the ground. One was the bloody remnants of a HYDRA agent, shot straight through the heart. The other was (Y/N), who was face down on the ground and definitely the one letting out an almost silent whimper.

“Shit,” Steve muttered under his breath before jogging over and crouching beside her.

Tony cleared his throat over the comms. “Cap, what do you got?”

“(Y/N)’s down,” he said, flipping her over gently onto her back.

There was a trail of blood spilling down the side of her face, dripping onto her shoulder when he held her up. It came from the side of her skull and, upon further survey, Cap found a bloody stain matching her injury on the dumpster.

“And the bogey?”

“She got him, but she’s not responding.” Steve tried to wake her gently, but got nothing. “Bleeding from the head. It could be bad. We need evac.”

Natasha spoke up before anyone else could. “On my way. Don’t move her.”

Steve leaned over (Y/N), still holding her in his arms. A breath of relief escaped him as Natasha appeared around the corner. As she raced over to assess the damage, Steve whispered to himself and perhaps (Y/N), too.

“Just hold on,” he said. “I’ve got you.”

(Y/N) was admitted into the compound’s medical centre as fast as possible and after a long process of stitching her up, she was put in one of the recovery rooms. She still had yet to wake up, so Steve had yet to leave her side. Wanda had brought him a cup of coffee, which he drank in minutes, and Clint brought him some garbage fast food. It wasn’t much, but it would help him power through the night.

And power through the night he did, not getting a wink of sleep. They told him her injury wasn’t fatal, but it could be damaging. In fact, she could have a small case of amnesia. At that news, Steve wanted to cry. It would be Peggy all over again.

Over the last few months of knowing (Y/N), the captain had become rather fond of her. She rivaled his own mother hen attitude toward the team. Peter even called the two of them Mom and Dad as a joke once. (Y/N) called Steve ‘honey’ once after that, which made Bucky choke on nothing. Steve wouldn’t admit it, but he had almost tripped over himself.

“Steve?”

At the small whisper from the bed, Steve snapped back into focus. (Y/N) had opened her eyes drowsily and glanced around, spotting him.

He leaned over her bed and instinctively took her hand. “Hey. How are you feeling?”

“Like I ran into wildebeest stampede,” she chuckled.

Steve just kind of tilted his head. “What?”

“Oh, man, you haven’t seen Lion King yet?” She gaped a little. “Who’s been catching you up? They’re not doing a good job.”

Steve laughed a little, ducking his head to look at the ground. “Got really worried about you there for a second.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Yeah?”

“They said you might have amnesia,” he said quietly, glancing up again.

Instantly, she frowned. She squeezed his hand almost reassuringly and tried to meet his gaze as a form of comfort, but he wouldn’t look. Of course, she knew about Peggy. Everyone did, but especially SHIELD agents.

“Everybody else okay?” (Y/N) asked to change the subject.

Steve laughed. “Of course that’s what you ask. Yeah, everyone’s fine. Peter passed out on the lounge couch, so Tony drove him home, since he has school today.”

“Love that kid,” she muttered. “Are you okay?”

“Better now,” he sighed, giving her a small smile.

(Y/N) could not help looking up at him with a dorky grin. She then tugged on his arm. “C’mere.”

Though bewildered, Steve scooted his chair as close as he could and leaned over her, searching her face to see if something was wrong. He saw nothing off, so was content to remain in the new spot.

(Y/N) placed her hand on his cheek, caressing it with her thumb. He started to get an idea of what she was hoping for and leaned in closer, kissing her softly. His lips were somewhat rough, but neither noticed. When (Y/N) pulled away, she went in again to press her forehead against his.

“You’re sweet, Cap,” she said.

He smirked. “And you’re stubborn.”

“MR STARK! YOU OWE ME A NEW SUIT!” Peter screeched as he ran out of the recovery room, which he had just entered a second before. “MOM AND DAD ARE KISSING!”

Masterlist

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #251

apologies the formatting is fucked up, oof.

How many smurfs can you name? Zero. Have you ever fully eradicated a bad habit that you had? Uhhh maybe? I'm not sure. The radio is playing U2, The Defects, Echo & the Bunnymen, The Pointer Sisters, Staubkind, and Dr. Dre. on different stations. Which band are you most likely to listen to? I only know U2 (and do NOT like them), Dr. Dre, and one song by E&TB; I don't know the others. I guess I'd pick whichever song sounded most appealing. Miracle on 34th Street, original or remake? Never seen it. Have you ever been in a parade? No. Do you turn the bass up all the way in your car (or would you if you had a car) and blast the music? Ew, no. That shit's obnoxious. What keeps you from being happy? I'm quiiiite sad of an adult. I want to feel worth something, do something. If you could go back in time and talk to yourself five years ago what would you say to yourself (You can only stay in the past for FIVE MINUTES so make it COUNT!)? At that time, Jason and I would still be together, so I'd try to nail it into my head that I can't put my happiness entirely in another person's hands and that I have to have faith in myself and my own strength. AND ESPECIALLY to not give up, to keep trying harder every day. Five minutes wouldn't be enough. What websites are addictive to you? I'd go bonkers without YouTube, and I go through Tumblr binges, but then don't go on for a few days. I have to check KM daily, but it's not really an "addictive" thing, but rather the admin instinct of I have to make sure everything is in order. I check Facebook habitually, but only like, once or twice a day. Who do you never want to end up like? It's... sad to say, but in a lot of ways, my mom. Her life's just been super, super unfair. As a person she's mostly lovely, but as far as luck, happiness, and success goes, sometimes it feels like the whole world's against her. What will you never ever do again? Turn another person into my whole entire universe. What’s the most terrible lie someone could tell you? Something regarding Jason, I'm sure. Probably like, he said he never loved me or something. Even knowing that's absolute shit, PTSD is a ride and I'd. Lose my absolute shit and obsess over "well what if he really didn't." What was the last thing that you printed out? Stuff for my Women Writers class. We print out SO much shit there. I feel like I've alone killed at least seven trees by now, and we don't have a choice but to print the readings out. What do you look forward to each day? M a r k/Unus Annus video boiz. What’s the best song to listen to after a break up? "It depends on the context of your breakup." <<<< This. The radio is playing Poison, Inxs, the Psychadelic Furs, Dio, and Matchbox 20 on different stations. What do you listen to? AHHHHHHHHH Poison, my friends. Do you know what it’s like to take care of someone else? Not really, I guess? But yes to a degree: I've babysat twice, and I assume that counts, and then when Jason had bronchitis, I would barely let the dude leave the bed. Would you rather take care of someone or be taken care of? I don't know, I guess it depends on what's wrong? What is the worst 80’s song in your opinion? You're asking someone who loves '80s music. I'm sure there are some pop-ish/more mainstream ones I don't like, but idk off the very top of my head. What song makes you so happy that just want to dance and dance and DANCE? None. What has been your most beautiful magical memorable cloud nine manic ecstatic incredibly happy bouncy air-light moment of this life??? Slow-dancing to "Stairway to Heaven" w/ Jason out in my yard in his headlights the night of prom. It's the reason I absolutely, entirely, 100% cannot listen to the song anymore, no chance. Do you go out of your way for other people? Depends on the person. What’s your favorite short story? I don't know. Have do you feel about beauty pageants? I fucking hate them. It always just feeds the standards of society and makes both women and men hate their bodies. It also puts far too much emphasis on the "importance" of appearance versus personality. What is your favorite DIY related website? I don't do/watch DIY stuff. Do you bruise easily? Very very, but not the ones you usually see clearly. I don't know how my anemia test came back negative. What kind of bread do you like? Pumpernickel is entirely the supreme type, I love potato bread too, I enjoy wheat... Are your air and water as pure as you want them to be? Idk about air, but I'd suppose so; we live in a rural area. Our tap water, I'm positive no. There's some weird shit with our water. The smell is fucking disgusting, like pure iron, but supposedly it's clean... We've had it tested a few times, but there is SOMETHING wrong with it. Would you ever visit an insect zoo? Sure, if they couldn't get on me. Can you enjoy life without stimulants (coffee, cigarettes, drugs, alcohol)? All of those, yes. Does caffeine count? If so, I'm sure I could, but it'd be very hard. How much thought do you put into your dance moves? I don't dance, so like... zero. What is something you want to improve on this year? Just how much I care about others' perceptions of me, mainly over the most trivial of things. If you could, would you want to stay young forever? No, considering I want to die one day. Immortality sounds ew. What is/was your worst subject in school? Mathematics. Are you a sarcastic person? Oh yeah. What role does religion play in your life? A small one. It helps that my religion (or at least the one I relate closest to, Neo-Paganism) doesn't have the most strict doctrine, therefore allowing a lot of wiggle room varying from person to person. Can you sleep with your eyes open? No. In the past week, what song have you listened to the most often? "Broadcast From Beyond the Grave: Death Inc." by Motionless In White. What was the last thing you shared with someone else? I shared some fries with my mom last time we grabbed fast food. While playing video games, do you prefer being first or second player? I don't care, UNLESS I'm showing someone a new game and therefore I know what to click and such to set the game up; in that case, I prefer to be player one. Otherwise, I don't care at all. What is the most difficult word for you to pronounce? HA, currently, my Biology professor's last name. I obviously won't share it, but I always fuck it up. What did you have to do for the last homework you were assigned? I have to watch a movie - The Suffragette - for Women Writers for when I missed it that week I was away from school. What was the last important thing that you thought about? I think if Mom and I really should stock up on food and TP, but to an actually realistic degree. You hear so many different voices on how bad this pandemic is really gonna be. Personally, I think it's an extreme overreaction, but what do I know. I haven't researched. Generally, do you call people, or wait for them to call you? I wait. I hate talking on the phone. Has anyone ever questioned your sanity? I'm sure, including my gd self. I'm 99.99% sure at one point in the breakup's aftermath, I actually was insane by definition. Especially now that I'm mostly recovered, looking back I'm just like... "hun." How many people do you depend on? Just my mom, really, but to a dangerous degree. How many people do you think depend on you? I feel like my mom does, to an extent anyway. I'm the only person who lives with her and I know she loves me, so I'm company for her. Especially now that she has cancer, she's really gonna depend on me during chemo and surgery. What is the worst color combination? Uhhh maybe like. Puke green and brown? Have you ever injured yourself walking around in the dark? Yeah, but nothing severely. At what age did you develop an interest in the opposite [or same] sex? Idk. I was "ew, boys" until I think... late elementary school. Girls, I had my bi crisis in the 8th grade. Then came the denial and shoving into the very back of my skull. I came out as bi though late '17. Are you or members of your family religious? I think my entire family is but me. Well, correction, I have like a mild connection to religion, but definitely not Christianity like the rest. When was the last time you acted like someone you’re not? Good question. It's not something I really bother with anymore. Like, I can curve around things I don't want to share, but I don't fake what I do reveal. When was the last time that you cleaned your room? Actually! I vacuumed and dusted yesterday. Or the day before, not sure. How many hats do you own/wear? Either none or one, in which case it would be a Carolina Hurricanes' cap as a memento I got from one of the hockey games Dad and I went to. Did the last song you listened to hold any special meaning? I actually don't recall what it was. Are you experiencing problems within a current relationship? No. When you’re upset, who do you turn to? Usually Mom. Does winter weather depress you? Noooo! Who was the last person that you called? Me mother. What product was being advertised on the last commercial you saw? I haven't watched TV in forever. When you think about your last relationship, what song comes to mind? "Oh, Pretty Woman" by Van Halen REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Are there any lyrics to describe your current crush/relationship? Eh. Who in your life makes you the most uncomfortable? Probably my sister's husband, really. I don't think he likes me at all. Treats me decently to my face, but I have my reasons to believe so. Do you ever receive comments on your weight? Not unless I'm at the doctor. Occasionally people who know me well comment I've lost weight, but it hasn't really happened lately now that my weight's slightly risen for who the actual fuck knows why. Don't get me started. Is there anything that you do just to make other people happy? Uhhh just for that sole purpose, don't think so. When you need a temporary escape, what do you do? Listen to music or sleep. What was the last lie that you believed in? I don't want to focus on it. What band would you most like to meet? OZZY. LET ME SEE MY DAD. What was the last thing that you wrote down [with a pen/pencil]? Psychology notes. Has anyone told you that you have a nice smile? Yes. Are you uncomfortable with being photographed? YES. How many people have you talked to today? Just Mom. We woke up in the middle of the night to screeching tires outside; someone lost control of their car because dumbasses go lightning speed around this cure we live on. When you go camping, do you sleep in a tent or an RV? Never legitimately been camping. What’s one ridiculous thing that you do? Let anxiety ruin a lot of opportunities. Do you feel that you must wear makeup to be attractive? Ehhh no, depending on your taste. Ever done anything dangerous while driving with someone else in the car? I don’t drive. Name someone you wish you could be closer with? There's a handful of old high school friends/acquaintances I have on Facebook I really wanna rekindle relationships with. I think I especially would like to get to know Courtlynn better. We seem very similar. What’s unique about your city or town? Its name is shared with a town in Tennessee. Are you a momma’s girl/boy? I'm very close to my mom. What is your favorite dance to do? *shrugs* What is your favorite song to sing? I don't really sing along with songs, but I suppose "Disguise" by MiW. It holds meaning to me and I also just love the chorus. Is English your 1st language? Yes. Did your older sibling ever tell you freaky stories that you believed? I DO NOT know why I remember this, but one time she told me that a boy in her class kept saying the same word repeatedly so many times that it became the only word he could say. It scared me, lmao. Where is the biggest scar on your body? I'd assume at the very bottom of my pelvis where I had surgery. I can't actually see it, but cleaning the area let me know it was kinda long. Do you have a yahoo account? No. Is your mom prettier than you? This is such a mean question, tf. What do you think about guys shaving their legs? You shave whatever you want, boo. Are you a violent person? Not at all, if you don't include my insane nightmares/terrors/whatever they qualify as. Those are always violent. Do you like word searches and cross word puzzles? I do. Have you ever gone to a private school? Yes, my college.

[hellfire-state-of-mind]

Not Fit to be a Hero

Part 1

Telepath!reader au

Warnings: not any in this chapter (maybe none at all?)

Word Count: 1564

A/N: Ok so I have no idea how long this whole thing is going to be but if I waited until I finished the whole thing and then posted it as one long fic, it would’ve been long enough for me to worry about people wanting to sit and read it (maybe 4-5k, maybe more?) Idk what y’alls preferences are for fic length so yeah I’m just gonna split it up into parts. Like I said, I haven’t finished writing the whole thing but I will (eventually) and there will be more parts. Maybe only like 3 or 4 parts total (I guess like a mini-series).

“Telepaths aren’t inherently evil-” you try again, but the senior hero cuts you off.

“Mind readers aren’t inherently evil,” he says. “Mind controllers are. None of us can trust you when you can force any of us to do anything at any moment.”

“But I wouldn’t-”

“But you could.” Stark’s gaze is hard. You look around at the others gathered behind him- Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner. They all hold the same cold, emotionless expressions. Their decision was final. “We can’t trust you, which means you can’t be a hero. I’m sorry.”

“You can’t trust me? What about her?” You gesture at the small, ginger-haired girl shrinking back from me. Wanda Maximoff. Who you thought was your friend. At least up until now. “We have the same abilities. She could turn on you just as easily as I could. Why trust her and not me?”

“Wanda has already proven her loyalty to the Avengers. You, on the other hand, refused to help the last time we asked you to. So what makes you think we would just welcome you back with open arms this time?”

“I was a kid back then, I was scared! I didn’t know what to do so I ran! How can you decide whether you trust me or not based on what I did when I was 15?”

Tony huffed through his nose. “Alright, I’ve had enough.” He flips the Iron Man mask onto his face and raises his hand at you, his repulsors whining as they charged up. “You have our answer. Now get. Out.”

You look pleadingly at Wanda one last time, but she avoids your gaze. Defeated, you turn and walk to the elevator. The doors open but you don’t enter when you hear Wanda’s voice in your head. “I’m sorry, Y/N.”

You think back, “It’s not your fault, Wanda. I don’t blame you. But don’t reach out to me. They’ve made it clear what will happen if they see me again.” You walk into the elevator, turn around, and see her look of regret just as the doors close.

-

You enter your tiny apartment, fuming, and slam the door closed with your mind. One chance. That’s all I needed, you think. They wouldn’t give me even one chance to prove myself. I guess one telepath on the team is enough. You throw yourself down on my bed and close your eyes, holding back a scream of frustration. I’ve caused enough trouble today as it is, let’s not add property damage to the list. You think back to your days with HYDRA. The experiments.

They didn’t know what powers you would manifest after using Loki’s scepter on you. When you started presenting as a telepath, Wanda was assigned as your mentor. You trained with her, she taught you everything you needed to know. Only you were stronger. She weaves her magic with her hands. You can crush a grown man’s skull to dust with a single thought. And you have, while training, gauging just how powerful you were. When the Avengers attacked your base, you escaped with Wanda and her brother, Pietro, without a single scratch. Wanda didn’t let you fight like she and Pietro did. She made you run and hide, told you to wait for them to find you. And they did. But the base had been destroyed. The three of you retreated into the city, Sokovia. There, you were recruited by Ultron, a malevolent AI created by none other than Tony Stark; he wanted to wipe out all human life and start Earth’s population anew and to do it, he needed Sokovia. The next time the Avengers attacked, the city was flying thousands of feet in the air. Had it dropped, the impact would’ve killed billions. Wanda and Pietro aided in the evacuation, having abandoned Ultron when you finally learned of his entire plan. You left, too, but left with the evacuees. You ran. Over the years, your psychic link with Wanda had never faltered; you shared in her pain when Pietro died, you felt her remorse when her mission in Lagos went awry. You whispered to her in those times, trying to ease her pain. You often talked through the link. You could see her, she could see you, you could both find out where the other was if you just closed your eyes reached out. But you never saw each other face to face until today.

When you open your eyes again, the sun is rising over New York City. You can hear your next door neighbor bumping around, getting ready for the day. You turn your head and see Avengers Tower directly through your window. The events of yesterday flood your mind and a new wave of fury crashes over you. You stare at the city skyline and the glass in every window in the small apartment shatters. You close your eyes again and sigh. It’s bad enough I don’t actually pay for this place, I’m just squatting here. Someone probably heard that and they’re on their way to investigate. You open your eyes and sit up with a groan. “Well, better be gone before they get here.” As if on cue, there’s the rattling of a key turning a lock and the front door swings open. Soft footsteps pad closer to your room. As soon as their head pokes around the doorway, you lock eyes with them. The landlord. Maintaining eye contact, you slowly approach him as he backs away. You lead him out of the apartment and don’t break your concentration until his head disappears down the staircase. You let out the breath you were holding and rush back into your former home, throw what few belongings you have into your worn duffle bag, and get out, closing the door softly this time. You sprint down the stairs and onto the already busy city sidewalk.

“Y/N, are you okay?” You hear Wanda’s voice whispering in your mind. “Please talk to me.”

“I’m fine,” you reply curtly. You shut out her voice and start walking.

-

“Tony, you should see this.” Steve turns the computer to face him. Tony takes off his safety glasses and reads what’s on the screen.

“ ‘Last night, another crime was solved by the NYPD.’ ” Tony dictates. “ ‘Similar to other cases solved earlier this month, the suspect walked straight into the police department and confessed to his crime.’ I don’t get it, why would he just walk in and confess?”

“Apparently, after his official arrest, he claimed that he was being controlled. That he was forced to confess.”

“What, like threatened?”

“No. Actually controlled. He said he felt like a puppet with someone else moving the strings. He’s not the only one. There have been 5 other cases solved this last month alone, all ending with the suspects just waltzing in and confessing and claiming they were being controlled. No one knows who’s controlling them but whoever it is has been officially named the Puppeteer by the media. Someone even thinks they got a picture of them.” He pulled up a slightly grainy picture of a figure in a mask and dark purple suit.

“Huh,” Tony breathed out. “So, what, you think this Puppeteer could be a potential threat?”

“I’m not sure.” Steve admitted. “I did notice, and I could be completely going out on a limb here, that these things started happening right after that incident with Y/N.”

“The telepath? Wanda’s friend?” Tony tried to remember.

“Yeah, her. Do you think this is something she would do?”

“Yes,” came a voice from behind the two men. Wanda. “It is. All she wanted when she came to see you was a chance to prove that she could help but you didn’t let her. This would be her way of proving herself.”

“You’re absolutely positive this is her?” Tony asked.

“No. She somehow managed to block me out, I can’t see her anymore. I can talk to her, but I have no idea where she is or what she’s doing. But this feels like it’s her.”

“What do you propose we do? If it is her?”

“I...I don’t know. If it is her then we need to be careful how we approach her. If she feels threatened, she’ll fight. And I know her power, she could easily take down all of us and come out of it unharmed.”

“I say before we think about confronting them, we need to decide if Puppeteer is a threat,” Steve chimed in. “If they’re not a threat, then wouldn’t it be best to just leave them alone? From what we’ve seen, they’ve only been doing good. They haven’t hurt anyone-”

“Yet.” Tony cut him off. “They haven’t hurt anyone yet. Telepaths with that level of power are dangerous, they can be unpredictable and if it is Y/N then I think yes, we should consider them a threat.”

“But we don’t know that it’s her. We know it might be but what if it’s just another telepath?” Wanda defended.

“Tell me, Wanda, how many telepaths do we know? Hm? Not just that, how many telepaths do we know are in New York? 2. You and her.” Tony paused. “I think it’s her and I think we need to go after her. I’ll call for a team meeting.” That was all he announced before leaving the room.

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 33: The Dapper Little Men of The North

Chapters: 33/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: None Relationships: Loki x Reader (Someday) Characters: Loki (Marvel), Reader, Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), There Are No Puffins In Real World Hrisey Yet, But They Are Trying So, Someday You Too May See This Wonderful Sight Summary:   Puffins! Also something about unpleasant dreams, the Realm of The Dead, and some court case verdict, Idk.

Loki gazed out over the city, triumph swelling in his breast. Everything had gone perfectly! All his enemies had fallen, one by one; a mechanical heart crushed beneath his heel, a spy murdered, a skull split, a soldier captured, a brother banished, and a monster subdued.

He stepped out onto the open balcony, watching with great satisfaction as his army wove through the city, decimating the rest of the opposing forces. They would wind throughout the nation, spreading the news of his reign. Portals would be opened all over the planet, dropping more of his soldiers, consolidating his power. He should be king within days. King Loki, Allfather of Midgard. What a lovely ring it had.

Standing beside him, Odin nodded slowly.

“I remember what this was like.” He said. “The eve of a successful conquest. The feeling is indescribable. What will you do with them now, my son?”

“I'm not-” Loki snapped. “If you fear that I will align them against you, do not. I care nothing for you or Asgard. I now have what I was promised, and I will rule them like a stern father. I will make them great, brook no insolence, and eventually, we will rise in prominence to become a galactic power.”

“Ah, yes, what was promised to you.” Odin said, unperturbed. “And what of what you promised? Those that facilitated this victory will come for their tithe. The price of your reign is half your own subjects!”

“There are billions of them” Loki snarled. “Losing billions only means that I still have billions left! And they breed so swiftly that their numbers will swell within a mere century. The Titan is a fool, and his price is a temporary setback at best!”

“Does the king consider his subjects to be mere chattel? To be traded as currency for power?”

“It's half or all. I am doing them a favor by ensuring their survival under my rule.”

“Perhaps. But you might be losing more than you understand. The true price of your reign might be as yet unforeseen.”

Loki sneered. “You use so many words, yet say nothing.”

“Then perhaps you should be shown, boy.” Odin placed his hand on Loki's arm, and they were whisked away to another place.

Loki found himself on a road, surrounded by orderly rows of tall plants that went on for miles on all sides. Before him was the edge of a town much smaller than where he had just been, its inhabitants being herded onto either side of the road, into the deep ditches that divided asphalt from field.

Yes, this was part of the plan. Every planet Thanos got involved in had to be purged-for the inhabitants own good. Even though Loki would rule, the Titan must still have his due. It didn't matter. There was no reason to care.

But there was a woman there, being shoved roughly into the ditch, facing down the death squad with all the ferocity of a wild animal. She was bruised, bloody in places, thrown back again and again as she tried to clamber back up out of the ditch. Her left hand bled especially profusely.

As his army took aim for their deadly work, she turned, the only one to notice he was here. Her eyes locked with his, filled with bewilderment and sudden curiosity, a plea for help.

He was the last thing she ever saw.

Something wrenched within Loki, a tremendous loss he couldn't place. A seething emptiness for something he hadn't known, but could have.

“There are consequences to every choice.” Odin said as the fields burned and the people died. “You must decide what it is that you really want. Not what anyone else has told you to to expect, but what is truly important to you!”

He was gone then, and the corpses were gone, and everything was gone, and he was awake in a Midgardian hotel room, and you were sitting up in the other bed, fretting slightly at the blankets.

Loki threw off his covers, flipped on a light, and crossed the few feet between your beds to kneel beside yours. He threw his arms around your middle, and lay his head down in your blanketed lap. You were shaking slightly, and didn't signal that you wanted him to stop, so he just nestled there.

“Is...is it just gonna be like that?” You asked. “Are we just gonna keep sharing dreams, whether we want to or not.”

“I hope it isn't so.” Loki mumbled. “My nightmares are frequent and awful.”

“Yeah, looks like. That was terrifying. Is that...Is that really how you were?”

Loki said nothing.

“Who was that man?”

“That was my father. It only makes sense that he would begin to appear in my nightmares.”

“Oh.” You said, absently stroking his hair. “Unresolved issues. And he's gone now, so you can only talk to him in your head. Loki, how did he die?”

“He willed himself to go. Ascended to Valhalla before my eyes.”

“Wait. Gods have an afterlife? Where...where do you go after you die?” It was clearly something you hadn't thought about before. Many humans didn't think gods could die, so why would they have an afterlife?

“Niflheim.” He said, gloomy and reverent. “The ninth realm. The realm of mystery. The land of the dead.”

“That's...a real place? Like one of the planets you showed me?”

“Yes and no.” Loki said. “It's a difficult place to pin down. We know it exists. We know where it is. But it's insanely difficult to get to, and those that go are all but guaranteed never to return. At least, not in the same form as they went. It's the only one of the realms I've never been to.” He raised his head from your lap with a slight frown.

“No, I suppose that's not true. I went there once. But I am not able to remember.”

“Because you died? And your soul went there, but it's still a real, solid place? I don't know if I'm really following here.”

“It is the realm of mystery.” Loki said simply. “There is a great deal of speculation surrounding it. But we know for certain that it is real.”

“Where is it?”

“Within a black hole.”

“I'm sorry, what?”

“It is within a black hole. Specifically, the one at the center of its galaxy.”

“But...I thought nothing survived a black hole. That's why they're so scary and compelling. That's why they show up in every space fantasy story ever written since their discovery. Because they're terrifying, inescapable destroyers.”

  “Your people have no idea what happens beyond the event horizon of a black hole.” Loki pointed out. “And neither do mine. No one does; likely not even the inhabitants of Niflheim.”

“Which is totally a real place, where dead people live.”

“Which is totally a real place where spirits reside, and sometimes they still speak to us. And sometimes we remember a time when we were there, in between being one person and being the next. Niflheim is a realm, but it doesn't necessarily need to be a planet. It is where the spirit goes after death, and comes back to be reborn.”

“How? Light can't even get out of those things, how does a spirit escape? Do they swim?”

“It is not known. Photons may not be able to escape, but there are many types of energy in the universe, many types of waves that could comprise a soul. Things do escape black holes, through quantum tunneling. There are other potential ways, but we haven't solid evidence yet, and the few of us who did dedicate themselves to the realm's study have been disrupted. But...I was there, I know I was. I just don't remember.”

“Is that where Valhalla is? Did you go there?”

Loki shook his head. “Can't remember. I didn't come back to a different life, I was reinstated into my old one. I don't see how. I wasn't the kind of person who should sit among heroes. That's not who I am.”

“Says who? The king sure seems to think so. Most everyone I talk to speaks highly of you. And you've gone out of your way to help me. As it was described to me, you saved basically everyone's life when you brought the evacuation ship. And how many people did you potentially save when you set that absurd fire giant lose on your sister? How many people do you have to save, Loki? Like, what do you have to do? You said your dad willed himself to Valhalla? How many people did he save?”

“Quite a lot, actually. He's the one who initially locked Hela away. In Niflheim. He is the only person I have ever heard of who ever managed to open paths to the realm of mystery, and even then, he did it only thrice in all the millennia that he lived. I think he was only able to do it because of the kind of Aesir that he was: one connected to war and death. That's likely the only reason Hela could survive there, the reason the Valkyries were chosen to go forth and subdue her there. All associated with death.”

With all his exploring, all the paths and portals he had found, it was one of the only places beyond his reach. It had been frustrating in his youth, but now he had little desire to go back.

“Is that what heaven really is?” You wondered. “Souls sucked into a black hole, just waiting to escape?”

“Perhaps. That's what Niflheim is, but nobody can say for sure what it's like in there. The few people who can remember do say that it's divided up into lands, like an actual place. That there is some kind of reward or retribution for who you were when you lived. Aesir who ascend to Valhalla...their bodies dissipate into motes of light, and away they go. Thor didn't mention that happening to me, but sometimes it takes a while. As far as anyone knows, I was left a cinder, out in space, in the remains of a demolished ship. I didn't save anyone, _____. I failed, and died. That is what I do. I fail people, and I die.” A rueful laugh escaped him. “And they call that redemption.”

His death had solved nothing, not once in the several times he's been thought dead, and not when he had actually died. All he had left behind him was a legacy of ruin, where he had tried to help his people, and still caused innocents to die. Even here, people were beginning to die because of things he had done.

“Loki, that's not-”

“No.” He said firmly. “No platitudes. Not right now. I need to say this, please. I'm still doing wrong by you.”

“You-”

“Shh!” He pressed a long finger to your lips. “I wasn't meant to be this way. I know my reputation, and I earned it, but I didn't start out like this. I keep thinking if I can just successfully do something good...But I'm still just using you. To make me look and feel better, pushing my agenda and baggage all onto you.”

“I mean, You could have let me die. You didn't have to do any of this.”

“And what kind of choice is that?” He shot back. “Immediately leave your home and job, everything and everyone you've ever known, take nothing with you, leave your home nation, your culture, everything you love. Instead, live with people you do not know and cannot speak to, people who aren't even the same species as you, who live on timescales you cannot fathom, and manipulate powers you have no frame of reference for, tied to an evil villain who tried to conquer and enslave your people, and who murdered many of them. Or die. That is not a choice, that is coercion! That is what I have offered you. It is not some noble sacrifice on my part, the sacrifices have all been on you.”

“You're not an evil villain.” You said quietly.

“Oh, yes I am. Perhaps not actively, not at the moment. But it's still there. The things I have done, I did without remorse, without hesitation. Exactly like when I kidnapped you. There are things I've done you don't even know about, things whose consequences are still unfolding, and cannot be reversed or repaired. Dying isn't enough _____, I can never make up for what I've done. There is no retribution I can endure, no redemption I can hope for. I am truly wretched _____, and yet I keep striving for hope.”

You were quiet for a few long moments, long enough for Loki to wonder if he had said too much. You had the right to reject him, either for his past wrongs or his current pathetic whining, and he began to fear that you would.

“I'm not sure how to help you Loki.” You said, cradling his head. “I don't know what to say. I can tell you that you hide this well. But I'm tired and we just had a nightmare, so if you want you can stay next to me tonight.”

He craned his head up to gaze at you. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. You're not gonna do anything bad. Get up here, and let's be lost together.”

Loki clambered into the bed next to you, all limbs and no grace.. He settled down next to you and, with your permission, cuddled right up.

There was something naturally comforting about the sensation of your living warmth against his body, of the occasionally discernible heartbeat, the gradually slowing breath. When you were sleeping, still and peaceful like this, he felt almost like a normal man.

                                                                              *****

The next day found you on a ferry, crossing the beautiful blue fjord to a large island situated in the middle. There wasn't any blue water in Iowa; the streams and lakes were either clear and flowing, or thick with fertile, brown silt. The ocean smelled different from the waters of home, different even than the river that surrounded Asgard.

According to Loki-who was feeling much better this morning-the island of Hrisey promised to hold an enjoyable time for you, and so you had taken Acorn and Leynarodd north out of Akureyri, to the ferry.

Though the island was mostly ringed with high cliffs, there was a low harbor, and the rest seemed to be mostly flat. Loki took you to a small, seaside restaurant, which served some of the best fish soup you had ever had. The coffee was also very good, and both warmed you up very nicely. It was a cold morning for August, and you'd needed to put on all the layers you could. Your cloak would be getting quite a bit of use this winter, if this was any indication of the upcoming temperatures.

The little restaurant reminded you a lot of the old coffee shop back home, with its simple tables and chalkboard menu-helpfully written partially in English as well as Icelandic. Loki actually looked slightly uncomfortable in his surroundings for once, towering over everything, and seeming to take up way too much space. An extraterrestrial god-prince in a small town coffee shop. It was kind of amusing, and made you want to show him around back home. Or show him off, more precisely.

Oh, hey everybody meet my immortal god-boss! He's a real Prince Charming if you work for him, but he sure will slaughter the competition! Hahah, why are the cops here?

Yeah, that wouldn't go well. You did miss home, and it wasn't quite as old-fashioned there as people might think, but there were still people who painted bible verses on the sides of their buildings, and billboards that warned about the terrors of Hell. A known murderer claiming to be an actual pagan god was not going to be popular.

Loki leafed through the pamphlet provided when you'd left the ferry, while you ordered another coffee to-go. Hrisey supported only a tiny population of permanent residents; the majority of the island was a wildlife preserve, specifically for the seabirds. Outside of the single settlement, with its lovely, colorful houses, was broad, flat wilderness dotted with ferny puffs of fluffy white flowers, and patches of short juniper trees. The soaring mountains of the fjord were visible to either side, with only the shining waters separating you from them.

Using the pamphlet as a tour guide, the two of you visited the pair of museums located on the island: one focusing on historical life on the island, and the other specifically about sharks. That one was stationed in the oldest house on the island, a house that had once belonged to a man appropriately named Shark Jorundur, and detailed the history of shark fishing in the area, a profession no longer popular, but not entirely eradicated. Apparently, a traditional Icelandic dish was prepared from the fermented flesh of Greenlandic sharks, and you had never been less interested in tasting a local food.

There were many tractors in the little village, and you spotted one especially aged model with a trailer attached, loading up with people. A wave of familiarity crashed over you.

“Is that a hayride?” You exclaimed, dashing down to the street, leaving Loki to chase after you.

“Wait, no, ______,” He protested weakly. “You cannot mean to ride in that thing. Are we vegetable sacks, so lacking in dignity?”

“What's wrong?” You teased. “Scared of getting straw on your cloak?”

“This is beneath us.” He insisted.

“Not me.” You gestured at the cart. “This is essential summer and fall activity to me. You might have dressed me up and given me a different job, but you haven't pruned the cornfields out of this peasant just yet...” The people already in the cart were staring, some checking their phones and whispering to each other, some glaring. Altogether, they projected a rather unfriendly front. “...On second thought, a hike might be nice...”

Loki took your hand and led you away from the whispers and glowering, away to the lonely hiking trails.

“Looks like they recognized us...” You muttered.

“I am a rather prominent figure, and you are growing in notoriety. I don not see why they feel entitled to dominate the hayride, however.”

“You didn't even wanna ride it!”

“No, but you did.”

There were three paths, and you decided to take them all, one by one. You had the entire day after all.

The view was like a fairy tale from practically every inch of the island, and you let the magic of it sweep you away. It really was nearly perfect; beautiful surroundings, exploration, a mostly friendly village to return to, with delicious food waiting. A fantasy prince who held your hand and walked at your pace. He really was thoughtful sometimes. Willing to ride in a tractor trailer just because you wanted to. Taking you on this little vacation to calm your nerves and keep your spirits up while you waited on a verdict.

Loki seemed to like to go overboard on certain things. Now that he knew you were troubled, he was trying to overwhelm you with beauty. It was kind of working; you hadn't thought about the trial all day, and had only been bothered once, by the stand-offish stares of the people on the hayride.

The wind was biting cold though, whipping up off the water, the flat landscape doing nothing to slow it down, and even your plush cloak wasn't enough to keep your ears and nose from burning with cold, your eyes watering from the frigid gusts.

Again Loki provided a handkerchief for your eyes; you went much easier on this one.

“It appears that we will need to have another cloak made for you. Even this is clearly not sufficient. Fur lining perhaps? Heavier clothing too. It wouldn't do to let you take a chill. Your kind are remarkably adaptable, but you still fall to such things.”

Standing at the northernmost point of the path, Loki wrapped you in his cloak, so that only your face was poking out, the warmth of his body banishing the sting of the wind. You probably should have protested: this was far too casually intimate. This was boyfriend territory, and the thought of anyone calling Loki their boyfriend was just weird. It was so mundane.

But he had already said he didn't want you getting too cold, so you probably shouldn't worry about it. It was probably nothing more than Loki being extra. He was good at that.

“Behold.” He said softly, as birds approached, dapper little tuxedo patterned creatures, waddling and squawking with large, colorful beaks.

“Oh my gosh, puffins!” You exclaimed. The adorable penguins of the north. You watched them hop and cavort over the short, wild grasses, wrapped in the safe warmth of Loki's cloaked arms, and a little bit of joy suffused you. It would be wonderful to come out and do things like this every now and then. You'd hardly seen any of your new home, but everyone knew Iceland was beautiful. And also stuffed with volcanoes, which you hoped would not become a problem later. But as long as there were puffins, surely there was happiness in the world.

“They really are appealing little beasts, aren't they?” Loki mused. “Perhaps when we have the means, we can fund a wildlife sanctuary of our own?”

“You would want to do that? Loki, that would be amazing! There are so many places that need environmental help, but I've never been able to do anything about it.”

“Perhaps you will be able to, in the future. I don't mind helping. Your animals are whimsical and strange, and I rather like some of them. Contrary to popular belief, I do not actually hate the Earth. I never did, and Asgard has a long history of environmental conservation. Of course, that was for later exploitation, but the techniques were still effective.”

“Our own wildlife preserve...Maybe back in Iowa? There's a lot of endangered plants there, because of all the corn.”

“Would you like to plant them?” Loki asked. His face was awfully close, but you turned your head to look at him anyway, finding yourself captivated by those deep, glittering eyes.

“Yeah. I would.” You mumbled. So close.

A puffin hopped up on the path, and trod on your foot. It squawked loudly.

You looked down. “Oh my gosh!” You cried. “You're so cute! You're so brave! What do you want, beautiful birdie? You want scritches?”

“Meddling creature.” Loki muttered. “No wait!” He grabbed your wrist as you reached out to pet the bold bird. “It says in the pamphlet that we mustn't touch them. Their feathers have a special coating that protects them from the water, but our touch can destroy it.”

“Oh geez! Sorry little guy, I didn't know.”

“Here.” Loki said, enfolding your fingers with his. “Nothing to rub off here, except, perhaps, my many virtues.”

“Or your bad habits.” You snorted, giving him a small shove. Regret immediately flooded you; that wasn't the kind of thing you should be doing. That was something you did with Tara, or any of your old boyfriends, or school friends, or you dad. Not a god. Not royalty. Not your boss. Your hand-holding, surprisingly cuddly boss, who princess carried you, and snuggled you after nightmares... Okay, it could definitely be said that he started it.

Why was Loki so tactile? You couldn't help but wonder, as he kept hold of your hand, and began the long, leisurely walk back to the village. Was he like that with everybody? You hadn't seen much evidence of it, but he didn't seem close with all that many people, and touching servants-even in a completely professional manner-seemed like it would be considered wildly inappropriate, even for a prince. That was something you had noticed about Asgardians: they were very proper about personal space, unless they really liked one another, in which case, they were all back claps, and arm clasps, and tackles, and hugs.

Loki didn't seem to have that with anybody. Even with his brother, he was somewhat withdrawn. He seemed to save it all up, to pour out on you.

Of course, you didn't yet know what he did, or who he was with when he was away from you. He could have plenty of friends you'd never met. He could have a whole mob of concubines...

No, that sounded wrong. Loki was very handsome, and very powerful, and had plenty of desirable traits, if anyone were to ask you. He was also a flirt, but oddly enough, he really didn't seem like a philanderer.

Still, you didn't know for sure. Not yet. Just that he seemed very comfortable with being close to you. Perhaps it was good for him, and maybe even a little for you as well.

There were whales in the water on the ferry ride back to the mainland, and Loki was particularly interested in them.

“Bigger than a bilgesnipe!” He exclaimed. “And humans used to hunt these with no more than harpoons? Preposterous!”

“We almost wiped them out. It wasn't even that long ago; some of them are still endangered.”

“It's a good thing Thor did not spend much time on this realm until recently. For certain, he would have joined in many such hunts with great gusto, and your whales would have been as much myth as we.”

“That would be terrible.” You said. “We've already caused so many extinctions. And just look at them out there. Wouldn't it be sad if they were all gone?”

“They are majestic.” Loki leaned on the railing, watching the huge animals swimming. As the ferry neared the shore, his phone rang. Whoever was on the other end of the line told him something he liked; his face stretched into a wicked, almost cruel grin.

“Well?” You demanded as he put his phone away. “What's that about? You look like a cat that just stuffed a dead bird in its owner's shoe.”

“Twenty years.” He said. “And immediate deportation upon release. Harsh, for Icelandic justice, but ultimately fair. The man did come here specifically to murder people, after all. Rejoice my dear. He shall never trouble you again.”

Relief flowed through you, lifting your stress, leaving you drifting on a kind of high all the way back to Akureyri. You floated through the entire evening like that, holding lightly on to Loki's arm while he took you out on the town, eating a lovely dinner, picking up a cellphone for you, and a little puffin charm to go with it. People followed you around, and everyone in the city must have gotten a picture of you, but none of that mattered to you for that night at least.

When you returned to your room, you actually gave him a real hug, full of solace and satisfaction. He took the opportunity to begin a slow dance with you, sweeping you effortlessly around the room until you were ready to turn in for the night.

You crawled under your blankets, looking forward to the rest of your vacation, and especially, a good night's sleep.

[rogue-barnes-16]

RUSSIAN ROULETTE (Destroyer fic)

Request: just watched Destroyr too nd I'm thirsty for a fic nd saw you're taking requests from it. Can you do a fic where chris goes undercover with the reader instead with erin and when the Russian Roulette shit happens the reader does something to stop it nd chris confronts her later or smthng || idk it's a messy request sorry. || Pls make it anon??? || lol srry XOXO

Pairing: Chris x reader (Destroyer)

Genre: angsty (?) idk how to describe it

Tags:

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @sinviix @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125

Warnings: not actual spoilers (that's a warning), tension, makeout, language

A/N: first of, I feel like I should make this clear again THIS DOES NOT CONTAIN SPOILERS BUT IT IS BASED ON A PART OF A SCENE OF THE MOVIE. Also, DAMN I enjoyed writing this. Also, it soothed the pain caused by the movie (thanks Nicole Kidman, you lovely human being, for destroying my heart). Anyway, enjoy <3.

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

I lay down on the sofa, giving Chris a brief glance to check on him. A while ago, I could have just asked him since all the party noise would have covered our voices, but it all had gotten really quiet.

People had slowly left, and in the house there were just a few people left. Silas, sitting on the armchair; Petra and that other girl, checking their messed up makeup in the mirror; Toby, playing some random video game; Chris, sat right behind Toby, and Arturo, who was coming my way in the moment.

"look what I found" he shook the pack of beers on his right hand, a mischievous grin on his face.

"reinforcements" I extended my hand for him to give me one. "nice, I needed it" I opened the one he gave me and took a sip.

When Arturo made a hesitant attempt to sit besides me, I moved my leg for him to have more room. "looking gorgeous today, Y/n" he said, half cuddling me.

Arturo was kind of pinning over me, I knew it. I sometimes, if I was in a playful mood, would lead him on. He knew I 'was with Chris' —even though we weren't actually together—, so there was nothing else apart from teasing and light flirting.

Chris, however, to pretend, most of the times would play the jealous boyfriend card, but right now he was distracted.

There was someone who was noticing it, though. Silas had his eyes on us, and, if I only had noticed it before, I would have stopped.

But I hadn't.

I jumped at the loud thud that sounded right besides me. When I turned to it, I saw a small gun on the floor.

"Arturo" Silas called the boy besides him. He tilted his head to the gun with a sick smile on his face. "let's see if your time has come?"

The room, now silent, was filled with anxiety and tension.

I tried playing it cool, but the fear in my eyes gave me away. I knew I was being too obvious when Chris decided to intervene.

"fuck it, Arturo" he said carelessly, not looking at anyone, but at the joint he had just rolled. "don't do it" he added, lighting up the joint before giving it a puff.

"it's none of your business Chris" Chris replied at Silas' statement with a gesture of indifference while he let out the smoke. "C'mon Arturo, grow a pair. Don't wanna play?"

I knew things were about to get worse than expected when Arturo got up and grabbed the gun from the floor.

"there he goes" Silas commented, letting out a dark chuckle. "c'mon, come here and look at me in the eye."

I stole a glance at Chris, who was subtly staring at me with almost unnoticeable nervousness in his eyes.

"Wait" all of them turned to me. "he doesn't wanna do it." before Silas could protest, I gave him a knowing smirk "doesn't have what it takes"

"sweetheart, it's done" Silas made himself more comfortable before looking at Arturo again. "someone gotta play now, so go ahead"

I wasn't going to allow that to happen.

"I wanna play." I stated, standing up. "and I definitely got what it takes" I made my way to then, noticing how Chris' breath hitched, making him swallow the smoke and causing him to cough. "c'mon give me the gun"

Arturo gave me the gun, not before looking at Silas for approval. "Okay sweetheart" the man sitting before me let out a chuckle. "same rules. Gun against your head and eyes on me"

"Silas, c'mon" Petra, who had stayed silent until then, spoke with a trembling voice. "don't- babe, let's drop it."

"Nope, babydoll" the man replied. "c'mon Y/n, make the roulette spin, will you?" it took me a second, but I managed to made the cylinder spin without looking at it. "atta girl."

"baby, quit it" I heard Chris voice, but I didn't really listen to it. "leave it, c'mon" I took a deep, shaky breath, and, when I felt my eyes watering, I pulled the trigger. "Y/n!"

Nothing happened.

I exhaled, tossing the gun to the floor and shutting my eyes. "Y/n, sweetheart, you're nuts." Silas started to laugh, giving me a surprised look. "it was loaded. You can't let people tell you what to do like that" everyone started to chuckle lightly too.

"it has three bullets inside" I turned to Chris, who was holding the gun with the cylinder open. "holy fuck" he managed to feign a laugh and I exited the room, feeling my whole body shaking.

"Chris, go get your crazy girl" Silas said, not able to stop laughing. "go and fuck, she'll calm down!"

I heard heavy steps behind me before a large hand grabbed my forearm, dragging me into a dark room. "what were you thinking" Chris hissed, shutting the door. "what the fucking hell, Y/n?"

"he-" I chewed my lip harsh enough to draw blood, while my back rested against the wall. "there was three bullets, you said it yourself. I knew there was a trick."

"so what?!" he hit the wall besides me, taking a shaky breath "it was damn obvious there was a fucking trick. That's not a reason for you to play the Russian fucking Roulette"

"what if he had killed himself?" I asked, hugging myself in a vain attempt to refrain my goosebumps.

"better him than you"

"Silas gave him the gun because of me. 'cause he was flirting with me" I explained "I didn't want his death in my conscience" I replied, gripping my forearms.

"yeah? Well I didn't want a bullet in your fucking skull and I almost got it" he bit back, choking on the last few words. "do something like that again and you're out"

"you can't fucking do that" I stated. "we're undercover, you can't make me leave."

"fuckin' bet, baby" he growled, trying to pass by me and open the door. He couldn't, though since I put myself between him and the door. "move your ass out of my way, Y/n"

"you really wanted one of the criminals we're chasing to get killed?"

"I swear to fucking God Y/n-"

"Tell me" I shoved him back for him to get away from the door "that you wouldn't have done something like that if you thought it was the right thing to do" when he, instead of replying, growled under his breath with his eyes on the ceiling, I repeated, "fuckin' tell me you wouldn't-"

We heard the door's lock clicking open and I panicked, afraid someone might have heard us.

"fuck"

I took a glance at the door, which was being opened.

"shit" When I turned to Chris again, I barely had time to process that he, with his hands gripping my hips, was backing me against the wall before hurriedly crashing his lips against mines.

"Hey guys- Okay" Toby stood there, holding onto the door frame, for a long minute, watching us making out. "they're fine!" he yelled, turning back to the room where everyone was. "I think they're gonna fuck!- sorry for the interruption, I'll give you some... Privacy"

With that, the door closed again and we were left alone in the dark. It was only when we were sure we were safe, that Chris let go of me.

We stood close to each other, breathing heavily. From my current angle, the moonlight made the tears in his face gleam.

Those tears that I didn't even know were there. Those tears that kept running down his cheeks nonstop.

"what are you fucking looking..."

He went silent when my arms wrapped around him, gripping the back of his jacket with both of my hands.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry" I whispered. "but I don't regret it. It was the right thing to do. Arturo didn't deserve that shit, you know it"

"you didn't either" he circled my hips, pulling me flush against him, like I was going to banish. "Goddammit, Y/n. You didn't either" he muffled a brief sob by burying his face deep into the crook of my neck. "God fucking damnit."

"nothing happened, Chris" I mumbled in a shaky breath, bringing him impossibly closer to me. "I'm fine"

"you scared the shit out of me" he muttered under his breath, letting himself rest against me. "I was so fucking terrified-"

"we're alright" I whispered, pulling away to wipe his tears.

After a beat of silence, he leaned on me an planted a tender, careful kiss on my lips. And it was easy to tell that this one wasn't feigned. This one had Chris' actual feelings on it.

"what was that?" I muttered, slightly confused.

"two weeks deep into this and you already put your life on the line three times" he explained with his jaw clenched. "I'll better come clean 'bout my feelings before you do something stupid and get yourself killed." I nodded, not really knowing what to say. "you... Don't have to- we can just keep pretending, it's fine with me" he cleared his throat, fidgeting with the hem of my jacket. "but, just in case, I needed you to know"

I nodded again without letting any word escape my lips. He waited for an answer that didn't come, and after a few seconds, he cleared his throat again and walked to the bed.

I frowned at him sitting on it. "we should wait a bit." he explained "they think we're fucking so-"

"it's gonna make it more complicated" I blurted out, half wining because, damn, I wanted to be with him. To actually be with him.

"why?" he questioned, resting his elbows over his thighs. "because we'll get too attached? Because we'll get hurt if something happens to the other?"

Those questions made me angry because they were, in fact, the reasons I was going to give him. Now that he had said them out loud, I realized they were stupid reasons.

We were already too attached to each other. We would get hurt anyway if something happened to one another.

"Y/n, I need you to say something"

I walked to him, sat on his lap, and caressed both of his cheeks with my hands. "Okay. Let's do this" I replied, pulling him into a kiss that was, by no means, meant to be rough, but ended up being it.

"Listen" he pulled away for an instant to take off his jacket and mine. "don't you fucking dare to play the Russian Roulette ever again."

"Okay" I pulled the tee off my body and tossed it to the floor. "I won't"

"promise you won't do anything stupid" he demanded, leaning to kiss my jaw, just to pull away to throw his shirt besides mine.

"I promise"

"Good" he cupped my cheeks, bringing me closer to kiss my lips. "cause I'm not sure if I'll be able to stay undercover if something happens to your reckless ass"

[readbythestarlight]

c2e28

“This flask is Taliesin’s new character” shut up Sam don’t mock us

They’re FINALLY going to go check out the Taskers and i swear if Taliesin’s character isn’t with them I’m gonna die

(unless this is all a trick and Taliesin is just hanging out until Molly can reasonably be brought back…)

Caleb stepping in and doing some strategizing both makes me proud and makes me sad because I guarantee he was great at that before Everything happened

Beau and Caleb disagreeing over a spider

“Shady Debaters Debate Team” I would wear that shirt

Nila wants to use her lighting let her fuck people up with her lightning draw people outside for her to fry please

Yes please get yourself some goddamn healing potions

YAAAAS NILA HAS HEALING WORDS

and good berries xD

GUYS I STILL LOVE HER SO MUCH I WOULD STILL DIE FOR HER

The Bone Orchard…ooooooo

Necromancers maybe?

Please go to the Taskers first I feel like Taliesin has to be with them

If people have been torturning Jester I’m gonna cry she’s too sweet for this

Nila’s smell bag is so cute y’all stop teasing her

“You are relying on me, I’m very happy” sHE’S SO PURE

Oh shiiiiit she just saved them from freaky forest ground monsters that’s my girl!

GRAVE SITE I’M TELLING YA ITS NECROMANCERS

Caleb getting tired of the debate and just heading over the gate

Not just carelessly flinging herself after him smh

Spooooooky place I don’t know how I feel about this

YAAAAAAAAS THEY FOUND HIM HOLY SHIT AHHHHHHHHHHHH OF COURSE HE LIVES IN A GODDAMN GRAVEYARD I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN HE IS THE ULTIMATE GOTH

HE’S A FIRBOLG???

“Caduceus Clay” AND HES A CLERIC GOD BLESS Jester will be delighted that she doesn’t have to do all the healing anymore

Caduceus seems delightful I’m delighted I MISSED YOU TALIESIN

fuck i love him already

he’s like the goddamn grave keeper TALIESIN COULD YOU HAVE GONE ANY MORE GOTH

B: “You’re drinking dead-people tea?”

Cad: “Aren’t we all?”

THE. ULTIMATE. GOTH.

…can’t bring Molly back. I’m not surprised at all given that it would be weird to bring his own character back, but still. That’s okay. It’s fine.

He just figured he’d sit there with his tea until someone came to help him leave lol

C: “Welcome to the Mighty Nein”

Cad: “There’s only, uh—“

B: “DON’T overthink it”

Nott shooting Beau to test Cad’s healing xD

FRUMPKIN NO DONT KILL HIM

fuuuuuuuck he dead

they needed him god dammit

HE’S ALIVE

ALIVE BY 1

I can’t decide if this is going to be a disaster, them going after them again right now, or???

LETS NOT SPLIT UP AT ALL EVEN JUST TO KILL TWO GUARDS

Taking off her armor is a horrible idea guys

Guest!Ashley has the cutest face and the purest laugh??? I love her

While we’re on break I’m trying to decide, is it weird that Taliesin chose to play a cleric when they already have a cleric? Part of me is like “what if he did that because he knew they were gonna need the temporary heals and he’s just gonna stick around as Cad until Jester is back and then he’s gonna rez Molly” and part of me is just like bfs girl Molly is gone let him go??

I don’t think I’ll be able to move on from Molly for sure though until the M9 move on from Shady Creek, with Cad tagging along.

Frumpkin the 3-HP spider

Not asking Cad questions nervously is adorable

Beau just sticking her face in the bag for the luck orb xD

Caleb: talks about breaking a guy’s skull

Nila: “excellent”

Poor Taliesin having to figure out a whole new character. He’d barely really figured out Molly yet.

20 for a perception check nice job Keg!

Sumalee accidentally meta gaming is honestly just cute enough that i don’t even care she could metagame all day and i’d be fine with it

HERE THEY GOOOOO

Matt looks so lost xD

FUCK ‘EM UUUUUUP TEAM BEAU/CALEB/NILA

FUCK ‘EM UUUUUUP TEAM KEG/NOTT/CAD

good rolls, good rolls…

YAAAAS GO KEG!

YAAAAAS NILA BASH HIM DO IT GIRL she’s been waiting to kill someone for so long

goddamn they handled that SO WELL LOOK AT THEM IM SO PROUD

“one was just enjoying the wind, and then darkness forever” Matt xD

Goddamn I can’t believe they pulled that off so well. Lorenzo better watch the fuck out.

Are we calling him Clay then because I liked Cad

Frumkpin the flying spider?? Methinks they all forgot Caleb made him a spider

Nila’s so excited to have like 32 gold she’s so cute you guys

Keg get another nat20 for stealth

okay… are they really unnoticed I’m nervous

B: “Look at the—look at the windows, too.”

Cad: “They’re nice.”

I love hiiiiiim

We can’t go get friends tho because they’re not HERE YET

Boy I can’t wait to see this map

Liam missing his rogue days hardcore right now lol

YAAAAS Taliesin with the nat20 deception I was so scared

“I’m gonna have an ulcer after this game” fucking SAME

Ashley and Sam holding hands like SAME god the stress

Also heck yeah we’re uncovering the maaaaap!

Liam is just very thoroughly uncovering the map

fuck don’t squish Frumpkin

“Hey Phil come help me kill this spider!”

Oh thank god good job poofing him out Caleb

I’m serous guys I love Caleb coming up with plans and leading the group in Fjord’s absence I love it

WAIT

YOU CANT SEND NOTT IN BY HERSELF

DONT DO THAT

FUCK

WE CANT AFFORD TO LOSE ANOTHER MEMBER OF THE GANG GUYS

NOT NOTT

Hey Caleb can you teach Nott the door unlocking spell?

Keg: “Nott. Be careful.”

Nott: “…Do you care about me?”

K: “…Yeah.”

N: *happy wiggle*

Fuck I don’t like this they were doing so well but this is going to be a disaster

A NAT1

FUUUUUUUUUCK

KILL THEM

fuck it was going so well god DAMMIT Caleb this was a BAD PLAN

God they’re not even all together I am literally so afraid right now

Yessss hasted Keg

fuckfuckfuck im literally so fucking scared right now

okay good they missed Not

FUCK ‘EM UP NILA

NO SAVE THE TOTEM FOR LORENZO

SAVE IT NILA

SAVE IT

poison spray yesss that sounds nice and 12pts damage good girl

poor Sam has such a hard time with his rogue skills

NOTT STOP RUNNING AHEAD

GOD Y’ALL DID MOLLY TEACH YOU NOTHING

fuck them up Keg

Yessssss kill him Keg my hero

Hasted Keg is the best man 4 attacks? She’s helping make up for a lack of Yasha

Keg getting between Nott and danger is so sweet I’m crying is she trying to make sure Molly does’t happen all over again

I would also die for Keg you guys

Sorry Phil you dead

BITCH HAS YASHA’S SWORD

FUCK HER UP

Wait until you get in the room above the trap door at least Nila

I adore her

PHIL DON’T YOU TOUCH NILA

yesssss he misses

NOTT

DONT FUCKING GO NEAR THE BARBARIAN

“IM THINKING OF REMOVING MY SPINE… CAUSE IT’S ONLY HOLDING ME BACK! :D”

holy shit Nott put her prone I’m crying I’m sorry I doubted you Nott

Fuck up the barbarian Keg yessss

Action surge means what what is that it’s cool

NAT20 YAAAAAS Keg is the BEST you guys

What I’m taking from this is that women name Ashley make the best lady characters and get the job done

why are you spending key points in non-combat when Lorenzo is still out there somewhere

Oh jeez are Cad or Nila close enough to heal Keg if she needs it??

DON’T TAKE AWAY HASTE

fuck

Liam and Matt gonna fight lol

Let Nila beat the door in

MOMMA POWERS ACTIVATE and she beats in the door HELL YEAH

Maybe she should have saved the totem for IN the trap door?

Sumalee is so concerned that she’s gonna make a mistake it’s cute

UH I KNOW IT’S A JOKE BUT YOU CAN TAKE TALIESIN’S NEW CHARACTER FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS SOMEONE ELSE CAN DIE

Cad coming in with the heals heck yes

“A cleric who likes to heal! It’s amazing” LOL Sam. My thoughts exactly though

This isn’t going terrible but it isn’t going great and I’m worried about what they will have left when it comes time to face Lorenzo

YEAAAAAH HDYWTDT CALEB HECK YES somebody grab Yasha’s sword

also damn Caleb you get vicious with that fire

oh baby

please don’t freak again Molly isn’t here to forehead kiss you out of it

Aw first time he managed not to have issues

Maybe Lorenzo isn’t home… that would be great…

Or he’s downstairs…

Damn, Taliesin, that’s so amazingly morbid and fantastic. Just melting them away into fertilizer.

Nott apologizing for not being able to unlock the door and Caleb reassuring her that it’s not her fault. My heart.

Trapped door.

They are all getting silly xD

Oh god okay here we go

“I like pink better than purple” Liam how dare you

Manacles again ffs Matt

God a whole underground place

“He’s looking for green or blue or goth”

Fuuuuck they gotta get through at least 3 more??

And still no Lorenzo

fuck i don’t like thiiiiiiis

Lorenzo is absolutely in there. If he was upstairs he would have come down.

You’re assuming that there isn’t another way out that they could escape through and flank you

Matt’s like “I just got the downstairs map out guys”

Cad/Clay/Whatever like “let’s just?? ask??”

Oh no

stop him

“fucking Phil, ammiright?”

fuck this son of a bitch up

16 damage fuck him uppppp Nila!

fuck him uuuuup Keg!

fuck him up Clay!

fuck him up Nott!

Clay just… turning him into mulch I’m crying

Damn I’m so impressed they took care of that so well

fuck traps

PLEASE LET NILA’S BABY BE OKAY

Nila being such a mom is my favorite like I’m so here for the peaceful person who has never hurt anyone, but will fuck you UP for touching their loved ones

SOMEONE HEAL ASSAR

IM CRYING

MATT STOP IT

it’s fine I’m only crying a little

“be well. be well my son.”

I’m very much crying

Let her rip it open Matt let her do it

Okay Nila it’s okay let Nott try or Caleb then if Nott can’t

SAM stop with the 1s!!

SHES GOT HER FAMILY BACK AGAIN I CRYYYYYYY

the power of love is stronger than metal bars hell yes

“I love it when it works for the narrative!” lol Matt at his most DM-i-est

FAMILY HUG ITS FINE IM NOT CRYING

oh god I’m gonna miss Nila so much

WE LOVE YOU NILA I HOPE WE SEE YOU AGAIN SOME DAY

FIRBOLG HUG

I’ve cried way too much these past like idk 7 episodes

Nila is forever a member of the M9 y’all save that feather

it’s fine

it’s totally fine

How many members of the M9 are there now

Fjord Jester Caleb Nott Beau Molly Yasha, then Shakaste, Cali, Kiri, Keg, Nila, and now Clay.

God this was such a good episode.

Caduceus is great guys. He’s different enough from Molly not to make me heartsore, and I think he’ll bring a nice new dynamic? I’m not at all disappointed by him (not that I expected to be, I knew Taliesin wouldn’t let us down).

I’m gonna miss Nila so much. Like Marisha said, she was the softness the group needed.

I can’t believe Sumalee has never properly played before! That’s amazing! She was amazing! I hope I can be half that great at my first proper game!

And I’m so excited to see how it goes next week, live from GenCon! Excited to see how this section wraps up. It’s gonna be amazing.

[starryseo]

youtuber!changbin

omg i’m excited for this one bc it’s the loml

s e o  c h a n g b i n

enjoy :)

Chan | Woojin | Minho | CHANGBIN | Hyunjin | Jisung | Felix | Seungmin | Jeongin

introducing the one and only. . .

Changbin “I love dark” Seo!!!!

so, as you (probably) already know

he has done lots of collabs with chan and jisung under 3racha

that’s how he met the rest tbh; chan messaged him and jisung both for a 3-person collab and then he stuck with them bc they made some bombass tracks

and he also manages the joint StrayKids youtube account where their gameplays are posted

he has too much time on his hands

which is also why he posts a lot of diss tracks about the other guys

it’s all in good nature, no harm done

and his insults are the bEST

he’s actually a lyrical genius

and no one can hate him or what he says in his raps because

1) what he said is probably true

2) if you hate on it, he’ll come out with a second diss track that’s much worse

his tracks are usually about how chan is like the dad of the group

but everyone just uses him for his money (not in a mean way!!!!!)

or about how felix is desperate for changbin’s love but it’s unrequited (he’s still salty about the forced kiss ok, give him time pls)

he hasn’t made a diss track about jeongin though because the boy is too precious okay no one can say anything bad about him except jyp but hes a snake so screw him

you may be asking what changbin could’ve said about seugmin bc he’s also heckin’ precious but i’m afraid you’re gonna have to wait for seungmin’s one to find out ;)

jisung once hacked into changbin’s youtube account

hacked meaning he guessed changbin’s password (hint: it was ilovegyu<3)

and changed the profile picture to a screenshot he got from a video hyunjin took of changbin being dared to act cute

the video was vv cringey so jisung figured this was the perfect revenge for that diss track changbin made of him

and he also thought changbin needed a change from the pitch black profile pic he had up before

yeah, he loves dark thaaaaat much

as well as producing music and gaming

changbin also dabbles in skateboarding and a biiit of parkour

he does this with felix

(when he has a quick method of escaping felix’s wrath, he can tolerate time together)

his skateboard is. . .

you guessed it: black

probably has a skull or some other ‘scary’ design on the front too

but felix managed to notice a small sticker of a munchlax (the pokemon gyu is fyi) on the back too :) cutie :) 

changbin really loves skateboarding because he thinks it looks cool and goes well with his dark concept

but then he always ends up bumping into something because sometimes he pulls his cap too far down and so he can’t see very well

idiot

it’s really funny seeing him try to act nonchalant about tripping up

when everyone around saw

and felix videoed it and is laughing his ass off

changbin threatened to murder felix if he posted that video anywhere

and felix was like “;) good thing i haven’t posted it... i did send it to the SK group chat though”

bro felix was literally running away for his life and changbin was right behind him on his skateboard tryna run him over

that was not a good day to be felix tbfh

the parkour he does is usually quite simple (about as simple as parkour w/ a skateboard can get)

but he looks badass whilst doing it so it’s cool

his favourite move is when he rides perpendicular to a rail and so the board goes under the rail and he jumps over the rail

it took a while to perfect the landing but he was really determined and now he’s mastered it i’m so proud of him

whenever he posts these videos he gets a lot of comments

because with his music & gaming videos his face usually isn’t seen

but with this, it is

so there are a lot of comments about him being b e a u t i f u l

the comment with the most likes was from jisung who was like “mr dark?? more like sunshine boy! :) keep up the great work i <3 your vids!!”

he was close to reporting that comment just so it would go away lmao salty

but instead he ranted to gyu like “sunshine boy? i’m not a sunshine boy, i’m a dark, dark man, right gyu?”

the group have a lot of hang-outs at his house (bc dude look at his house wtfffff it’s so shiny)

and his mum is the cutest!!! always giving them food as soon as they enter

she also LIVES to embarrass her child, poor changbin :(

constantly pulling his cheeks, giving him lil’ kisses and always calling him her “little prince” or some other equally cheesy variant

the guys lowkey thinks it’s cute and know she’s only doing this for fun, but they still use it as an opportunity to laugh at him

one time she whipped out the photo album with baby changbin pics and omg they’ve never seen changbin redder in the face than that day

no one knows if he was fuming or just really embarrassed lmao

what hurt the most was how jeongin - the baby of the group - was laughing and calling him a “cute baby”

and obviously hyunjin had to go “wow dude you were so cute, what happened to you??”

his mum, bless her soul, was like “he takes after his father that’s why”

#SavageSeoMama (this is where he gets inspiration for his diss tracks)

oKAY BACK TO GAMING!!!!

he mainly plays shooting games like battlefield, CoD and csgo with the guys

loves it when they play with just them in a local match, not online (mainly talking about CoD here)

because then he can put on friendly fire so that he can kill his team mates lmao

he’s a major kill scene stealer and proud - truly evil

the guys eventually kick him out of the lobby

only bringing him back once he’s apologised to them

to this day, he hasn’t apologised lmfao

when they kick him out he’ll just start playing online

because changbinnie don’t care 

he loves killing people’s hype

for instance, jisung will be cheering over the mic like “yay!! i got the last kill”

and changbin will just reply like “ok and?”

jisung: “wHY CAN’T YOU JUST BE HAPPY FOR ME?!?!?!? I <\3 YOU”

the real question is: how did jisung say “<\3″?

he kills his own hype too though

like when he gets the final kill and suavely goes “wow much skill”

and felix is like “yeah!! wow!!! that was so cool changbinnie!!!”

he’s just like “yeah it wasn’t that good, stop that”

sometimes when they’re all playing free-for-all

he’ll start singing his threats

like he’ll be two steps behind seungmin and just start lowly singing “seungmin, i’ve got your back~”

and like normally someone might interpret that to mean “dw bro i got your back, i’m protecting you, you’re covered”

but nah

changbin straight up stabbed seungmin in the back

seungmin felt that betrayal in his heart

so on the one hand he’s singing to people before he kills them which is heckin’ creepy

but on the other hand he has a beautiful voice so it’s not that bad???

but on the other, other hand (idk imagine 3 hands or smth) he’s technically being nice by giving them a heads-up before he kills them so

really

they should appreciate his kindness

:)

ok no i can’t defend him he’s too into these killing games

the only person he likes teaming up with is hyunjin and here’s why:

chan talks about strategy too much (dude all you gotta do is kill ok relax a bit)

woojin, as previously discussed, makes really bad rookie mistakes

minho gets too frantic when ambushed and just ends up dying without fighting back

jisung is too talkative

felix is also too talkative and is too risky (he’s literally jumped in front of changbin’s character dramatically like “I’ll save you!”. jeongin ended up killing the both of them together lmfao #DoubleKill)

seungmin just runs around in the middle of the battlefield with NO strategy

and jeongin is jeongin. he’s too precious for changbin’s lethality

so that leaves hyunjin. he’s the right amount of talk-y (yes that’s now a word), he has gr8 gameplays, he can handle a multiple-person attack AND he can be really frickin’ ruthless at times

gotta love that boi

felix is always fueled to kill hyunjin for stealing his man

but honestly changbin would rather just solo it because “i work alone, buddy” [sOMEONE GET MY REFERENCE PLS]

wow this has gotten rlly long soz

imma just end it here:

although changbin loves killing them in games and mocking them through his diss tracks

the guys know that they can trust him 100% and that he really, truly does have their backs (even seungmin’s)

and he’s always prepared to fight anyone that hates on any of the guys because only he can do that okay they’re his family and no one else can do that to them

he feels blessed to have them and whenever they come around to his house he’ll get lowkey sentimental bc wow, this is his family that bring a smile to his face everyday

and although he probably won’t admit it without jisung forcing him to, he really loves these guys and is glad to have met them

thank you for reading this far lmao hope you enjoyed it & feedback is always welcome!!

i saw some tag where someone talked about waiting for hyunjin’s one, and bc i’m doing this in age order he’s coming soon

and now just to playfully annoy them i wanna change the order

just kidding

ok not kidding i wanna change the order but i’m too lazy to since i’ve already planned it out

also!! is the desktop theme okay for everyone?? pls let me know of any improvements! :) thank youuuuuuuuuuu

[quantumghoul]

i wrote this a while ago, a rewrite of fox’s last interaction with father but didn’t post it bc institute fans used to be fuckin’ nuts. i’m sure they still are but the demons have returned to hell from where they came.

fox hates their monstrous son who deserves to be dying

warnings for misgendering, deadnaming, and mentions of dubious consent also idk if you find this child abuse bc they fuck him up a bit? he’s a 60 year old awful man but okay

“So, have you come to gloat?”

There he stood. He was waiting for them. Waiting to give them one last lecture, obviously. Most of his weight shifted on a cane, he still managed to shove his awful little finger in their face, and raise his awful voice to them. “Do you enjoy this? Ruining my life’s work? I gave you chance after chance. Despite your ties with the railroad. Your obvious activities to disrupt my work and the work of those here. I ignored it all, I gave you a position those here would die for. To lead the Institute into a better tomorrow. And this is how you repay me? I’m your son.”

There’s that famed guilt, it must be in the Houndstooth blood. He didn’t even have the blood. 'I don’t owe you anything.’ It’s what Fox wanted to say, it stained the back of their throat. They noticed Pat-- the Synth, watching them from the corner. As always. Diligent. It stayed in their throat. “I’m here to give you one last chance to actually help someone. I need your terminal, evacuation for the populous and deactivation codes for the synths. No one needs to die further.”

“No one needs to die further? You’re dooming it’s last, best, hope for humanity, right here, right now. Destroying the Institute-- there will never be anyone better than us. You think that those simpletons on the surface will ever come close to what we’ve accomplished? You decide to destroy everything because what, what reason? The synths. Those railroad people really did poison you, thinking they had any value to be saved. You are the one killing people right now. I have no reason to help you. To think such a thing.”

“Shaun, enough. Just give me access to the terminal, and the codes.” Why was their voice so quiet. They were shrinking. Into a corner. Just like with their father. He sounded so much like him, all the time. He’d be so proud. Eck.

“I gave you everything.” He motioned to the synth in the corner. Like he was an object. With Pat’s face and the implication, it all but made Fox’s stomach turn. “We could have been a family, we could have another chance. You stupid, selfish woman!”

That was enough. That broke what small self restraint that’d kept chained down. “Did you ever think to ask what I wanted?” They grabbed him by the front of his shirt and hoisted him right off his feet and into the air. He dangled, weak, frail body gasping and flailing his cane. Didn’t dare hit them. They’d hurt him worse for it. They pointed to the corner, to the synth. “Do you think I wanted this? Did he want this?! You didn’t ask us, either of us. We’re both just OBJECTS to you? Do you think I wanted some fucked up child version of you?

Pat stepped forward, hands raised. “Henrietta, I must advise against that. I am instructed that while your safety is of the most importance, prime directive refuses to let Father be hurt. I will have to hurt you.” There was hesitance as they pointed their claws at him.

“You, shut the fuck up. I don’t want to hear you speak. I never want to hear you speak again. And you--” They gave Shaun a hard shake. “You don’t know anything. About me. You don’t care about me, I’m an experiment to you that you can’t even dare respect the identity of. I am doing what I am doing because no one has given me any choice, no one cares what I think or what I want to do. Not you, not the railroad, but at least in the wastes, I found something worth while.” 

They slammed him down against his desk, rattling and knocking everything off. Shoving him to the terminal. “I have given you enough chances. Enter the code, or I will have to try and make you. You’re weak, you’re old, you’re dying, and I’m not afraid of you. But I think I can make you afraid of me.”

“No.” They slammed his forehead against the pristine white surface. Blood splotching. And again. “They never will learn a better way of dealing with things on the surface, hmm? Not without us.”

Yet another crack to his skull. Going for the head when you needed someone to work a computer isn’t the best idea, but then again, Fox didn’t have the highest intelligence. Not as much as mister ego here. “You act like I’m dooming the surface to live in utter squalor, like they haven’t gotten along without you. Since when do you give a shit about the surface for anything other than your personal petri dish. Enough excuses. Do you care so little for your own people, or are you going to be so much like me to let them die out of spite?”

“I am already dying, as you pointed out, and I am sure you killed many of them. Why help furthering the destruction and stolen property. Not much logic with those muscles.”

Another crack against the desk.

“Fine-- fine. Enough. I will.” That seemed just as persuasive as whatever they might have said. He didn’t seem to have much tolerance for pain. Probably didn’t even know what a bullet wound felt like. (There was a creeping feeling in their gut, curling around their spine, reminding them to care, to feel, to-- something over him, that they should feel bad, but they ignored it.)

They kept a strong hand on his back, pressure keeping him down. The other hand with deathclaw gauntlet ready to tear through flesh, Pat still off in the corner of their eye. His hands slowly found their way to the keyboard, beginning to unlock the damn computer and go about doing what Fox had ordered him. Typing surprisingly slow. Clearly reluctant.

They scowled, muttering to themselves. Also him. 

He clicked his tongue. “Resorting to violence. The wastes truly did infect you.”

“Are you still-- are you still like this? Do you have to die on your high horse?”

“I am simply stating a fact. Let this old man have one last review of his experiment then. Since I am not your son.”

Teeth gritted. He had to salt the wound to the very end. “Fine, you want to be my son so bad? How about a bed time story, something to put you to sleep. And! It’s informative and helpful to you. I can tell you’re a boy who doesn’t like fiction. The story of sad little Henri Jones Houndstooth. Someone who had never been taught to say no. That poor... poor child.

“Her parents told her she was a girl, and she said yes.

“Her parents told her she should go into medicine, and she said yes.

“Her father told her she was a disgrace and unladylike and ugly, and she said yes. Her mother said she should be grateful they bothered to keep her, and she said yes.

“When asked if she liked men, she said yes.

“When he asked her to marry him, she said yes.

“She wasn’t very happy, mind you, through all her life. But. She thought. Perhaps she was the one at fault. Everyone else was always so happy, everyone else was always right. She was wrong, you see, and if she stuck around... if she spent enough time with these pretenses. She’d he happy just like them.

“And when he wanted a child, well… she didn’t say yes, that was for sure. But it happened anyway, didn’t it. You’re here, aren’t you?”

He was deathly silent. Hands hovering above the keyboard as Fox crooned in his ear. “That is the end of Henri Jones, you see, as she died soon after that. She didn’t want to go in a vault, you see, the idea there was so... trapped. Stuck. She’d never escape. But she didn’t know the word no. Never no, always yes. Vault-tec surely didn’t know the meaning of no, so it all worked out.”

“What a cruel person you are,” he turned his head slightly, eyes down to the floor. Not at them.

“You had to inherit it from somewhere.”